Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

It had reached just over 6 years of them being together, when Shouto had decided to break up with him.

Katsuki never really knew why and even questioned Shouto multiple times on it but the only answer he’d receive is ‘I can’t give you everything you deserve in a relationship’. The scent that Shouto gave off that day wasn’t sad like he’d expected but more like anger, which he couldn’t comprehend why he’d felt that way. He assumed it had to be with him being an alpha and Shouto being a beta but he had told him before they even began dating that Shouto was what he wanted and that was more than enough.

That had never changed.

Even now after giving Shouto some space to think things over, that time being two months, Shouto hadn’t reached out to him even once. Then again he was stubborn as fuck, more than Katsuki, that often he would give in to Shouto’s silent treatment. This time though, he decided he’d wait for him, just to make sure he was certain of his decision.

Turned out he was.

By the time it had hit four months of them being apart, he had given in as he couldn’t stand it. Putting his pride aside, he decided to message Shouto one last time to ask if they could meet up before he had to leave to go on an undercover mission overseas. The mission was estimated to be around six months long if things went smoothly. That would’ve been the longest he’d been without Shouto since he'd met him.

Within a few minutes, he had gotten a response but it wasn’t the response he wanted, he remembered rereading it to make sure he was seeing that shit clearly. But the message was as clear as day, ‘sorry i’m busy but safe trips, Shouto’.

All that crossed his mind was anger.

Every time he’d encounter Shouto in public, he’d shrug him off and say ‘talk later’. There was never once one fucking ‘talk later’ and it had pissed him off, enough he started to question himself. What had he done for Shouto to distance himself so badly that he couldn’t have had a conversation with him. It’s not like they’d ended on bad terms, Shouto had even agreed that it's nothing against him and that they could still be friends.

Fuck being friends.

He still wanted to marry this man.

as ex sex c b 5

Not be fucking friends.

Since it was better than cutting him off completely, at that moment Katsuki couldn’t offer any more so he agreed since he still loved him. He couldn’t lose him as a lover and a friend, that’s one thing he wouldn’t be able to handle. He didn’t even try to seek out anyone else at that time, his mind was riddled with memories of him and Shouto. How could he even begin to think about anyone else?

Eventually, Shouto stopped reading his messages entirely and if he did get a response it would be two weeks later with a thumb down emoji. That’s when he decided it’ll be good if both him and Shouto had some space to think about their relationship. Lucky for him he’d be gone for 6 months and that was more than enough time.

Too much in his opinion.

When he had been sent off to his mission, which was based in England, he wasn’t allowed contact with any of his friends or family. That was harder than anything he’d ever gone through, it felt as if he was by himself constantly. The most annoying part was that he had to change his whole appearance: shaving his hair and dying it, his accent adjusted and even a few piercings (ones that he’d wanted anyways but didn’t have time to get). Scars came along with his disguise during the few scruffs he went through as he was forbidden from using his quirk. This way it was harder for people to notice him and he put in less effort to conceal his identity.

The mission itself was draining, the only thing that really kept him going was the thought of seeing Shouto again and the few friends he made along the way. The group of people he was trailing after, their main spot was a bar concealed behind tall buildings. With there being only one way in and out, it benefited him if he ever needed to intervene. The bar was owned by a couple around the same age as him, a man with red shitty hair and a pink girl with raccoon eyes. One thing he could say was that their cheerful personalities changed the atmosphere of the bar entirely; instead of it being quiet and dreary it was loud and almost party-like, it seemed like everyone was a tight-knit family.

The man in question,who he knew as Kirishima, didn't care that his name was a fake or real one after he told him not to get close to him. He simply replied with ‘but you look so lonely, held up in your corner so at least have my company’, friendly little shit. The man didn’t seem the type to lie, especially with the giddy smile he wore day after day. One of the main reasons his smile beamed, was that he and his partner were expecting a child well two as a matter of fact. In his opinion, Kirishima overshared too much to the point he was concerned how no one had tried to target him in this slummed area.

They were due just after his mission would end.

He didn’t make promises he couldn’t keep, but he did promise that once he got the chance and a break from hero work, he would come and visit. The man brought him in for a tight hug and cried tears of joy at his words, which he didn’t reject and patted the man lightly on his back until he was released.

Kirishima's partner was what he would call ‘overexcited’, the few times he’d met Mina she was always a handful. Always greeting him with a headlock - which he could easily get out of - but he never thought to fight her off in case he harmed her or the babies she was carrying. They weren’t your typical couple - then again neither was he and Shouto - with Mina being a beta and Kirishima being an alpha.

All they showed was genuine happiness between each other, maybe because they had known each other since childhood. But Katsuki would deem their relationship unbreakable, they spoke of nothing but the future of them together. All mushy and romantic, that it almost makes him want to throw up until he thinks about he was just like this.

With Shouto.

After they’d parted ways, Katsuki promised to keep in contact and that once he’d returned home he would contact them on his real account after he was allowed to reveal himself. They seemed delighted with just that news and said they’d send updates on the babies. Twins were alot for a first time parents he’d think; double the nappies, double the bottles and double the work. Then again they were both very hands on with everything when it came to the babies, so they’d work out just fine.

Not even a day after he’d arrived back in Japan, he got a message from Kirishima attached with 2 pictures. One with him sitting next to Mina’s bedside, where she looked worn out with a baby held in each arm. Then the second was of Kirishima putting a thumbs up with his signature smile with Mina and the babies asleep. It was captioned ‘the babies are here and healthy, you just missed it dude but you should be back already so message us when you’ve got time’.

To say he was fond of children would be an understatement - no one will ever know that- he’d always look at them with adoration. As they were helpless, yet had so much potential ahead of them and how they resembled their parents so much. Their childhood that he vowed to protect as his was taken away. Plus they are cute. Then he thinks of how he was once like that and inwardly gags at the thought of someone thinking of him like that.

Once he unpacked all of his stuff, which wasn’t a lot as most of it wasn’t his style that he had to adapt to, he began to think of Shouto. About how much he missed his presence around - especially with those two lovebirds clinging to him - he wanted to see him. Badly at that, so instead of messaging him and getting ignored anyways, he’d decided to show up to their house. Well now it’s Shouto’s house as the best option was for him to move out with most of the furniture belonging to Shouto. Plus he knows how comfortable he’d gotten in a short amount of time living in that house. For Shouto it took years of moving from place to place for him to be satiated, so when they finally found the one. Both close to their workplace and the marketplace, which ticked all their boxes so they moved in the following week after viewing it.

That’s why when he showed up outside to an empty house, he was more shocked than anything. He only knew it was empty after knocking a few times with no answer that their old neighbour, an old lady in her mid sixties popped out. The one he and Shouto would help bring in her shopping as most of her family lived far and rarely visited. She relayed to him that Shouto had moved out over seven months ago without saying goodbye.

So that was just before he left for the mission, maybe that’s why he declined to meet him because he was busy with moving. But still that didn’t sound like him at all, he always greeted the woman next door and he’d even get all cozy with her cats that’d she’d let out. Irresponsible he’d say, Shouto always begged for one but he always told them that with their lifestyle they couldn’t give it the best life. Shouto would be sad but agree and forget about the idea for another week or two if he was lucky.

“Yeah it seems he left in quite a hurry, I didn't hear any loud noises.” He took the bags that she was holding as she walked up the stairs, “ Not until two days before the moving van showed up which I would assume was any large piece of furniture. But I could sense he was distressed, with the scent he was letting off.”

“Yeah that makes sense, is there anything you need help with?” She shook her head and began unlocking her door, “If that is it i'll be off.” Distressed? What could be making him so distressed that even she could smell him? Shouto’s scent was weak and hardly noticeable so it was weird how she could notice it.

“You’ve done more than enough young man, now go find your boyfriend.” He cringed at the last word but he didn’t let it show on his face.

As he left, thoughts plagued his mind about Shouto and if he was okay. Had he even told anyone that he was moving, if so then who? But why would he leave so soon after they broke up? The memories maybe? No. He wouldn’t let something so trivial get to him and he loved that place as soon as they’d seen it on the brochure. From describing where he’d put everything even taking into account the big kitchen so Katsuki could cook multiple dishes at once. Katsuki knew that house was theirs before they even did a tour and was happy that Shouto could finally find comfort and call this place home. That’s why it worried him about why he moved out.

He only had one way of contacting him and that was through Izuku. That man hardly picked up his phone so he decided the best option would be to go to the office they shared. When he reached the building, everyone greeted and congratulated him on the successful case and his safe return. After a few run ins he went for the stairs, as only psychopaths would take them or if you wanted to start a warm up before gym and liked the exercise. Thankfully he was the latter.

Once he’d gotten to the 13th floor, he laid his eyes on the familiar door and swung it open with so much force it bounced off the wall. The mop of green hair shot up from the papers he was holding and looked at him with the expression of a mixture of happiness and confusion.

“Ah- Kacchan, you’re back? I thought you weren’t scheduled for another two weeks.” Izuku began sorting his desk, as if Katsuki cared. He’d once seen papers on every inch of Izuku’s side of the room. This? This was nothing compared.

“Yeah I'm not. I came here to ask you where Shouto is, I went to his house and it turns out he’s moved.” He stomped over and slouched over the desk to stare into his eyes, “And don’t act dumb, I know you know something.”

“Ye-yeah, Shouto-kun moved out and decided to take a break from work.”

“I fucking realised that on the way here, usually that bastard is plastered on every billboard but i didn’t see one that even resembled him. So say something you little shit, where is he?”

“I don’t actually know where he moved to,” Katsuki's right eye began to twitch, “I swear Kacchan, i’ve never even been to his house.”

“Tcch- fine, then give me his number at least, i know you have his new one.”

“Shouto-kun doesn't want anyone to contact him, he’s dealing with some personal stuff. That’s why he’s away from work.” Katsuki could see him beginning to sweat nervously.

Just what was this nerd hiding?

“You think i’d give a fuck about that? Now give me his number and don’t make me say it again.”

Izuku knew he didn’t want to get on the wrong side of him, especially after being on a mission so long, he was unpredictable. Reluctantly he gave it to him, not without warning Shouto first with a quick message that he was back.

Katsuki left the office quickly after that and started heading home, there’s nothing more he hated than a dirty house especially with him wearing the same clothes since he left England. So after he texted Shouto a quick message ‘Can we talk? Katsuki’, instead of sitting and waiting for a response he decided to start tidying.

Each surface was covered with a thin layer of dust, the fridge was empty and he had bags full of clothes to wash. So he got his hands busy with shopping since he’d have to walk past it on the way home anyways and it’d save him a trip. Expensive trip he had, he’d spent just over 70 thousand yen on groceries with most of it being cupboard stuff. Most of it being taken with him to England, if he didn’t enjoy their food during his stay he’d have options. By the time he could see his reflection in the cabinets, he decided to check for a response from Shouto but to his disappointment.

Nothing.

Three weeks had passed of him getting no response from Shouto, he wouldn’t deny that it was getting to him. They ended on good terms, so why the fuck was he acting like this. He was beginning to look desperate, every time he went out he'd turn his head so fast if someone even slightly resembled him with either red hair or white. Just anything to see him would satiate his mind, he almost feels nervous as if he hadn’t been assured by Izuku that Shouto was fine. But it wasn’t enough, he needed to see him for himself, touch him to make sure he was real.

Anything.

After a month of being back, he got a message from Kirishima that he and Mina would be coming to Japan with the babies to see him. Luckily, he had a spare room for them to use when they came. It only had a bed so hopefully they bring something for the babies to sleep in. They’d only waited a month because they didn’t want to risk any harm to the babies by being on the flight with how much pressure it gives off. Katsuki himself still thought it was too soon to even bring a baby outside, let alone on a 14 hour flight. But it brought ease to him, that he at least had something to look forward to and not be constantly worrying about someone who’s avoiding him.

He’d just finished a long 10 hour shift when he reminded himself he couldn’t turn up empty handed when the others came to visit. There was a small baby shop located near his and Shouto’s old house, he’d always notice Shouto eyeing it when they walked past. The one time he offered if he wanted to go in, Shouto flat out refused as if he had offended him. So he decided not to ask again. Work had exhausted him enough that he hadn’t even thought about coming to this store before, then again he could barely keep his eyes open. It’s only one store and convinced himself that he’d be quick with it so he decided to cross the road and head in.

What do babies even like? What do they need? When he entered he noticed it was only the shopkeeper and one other person in the toy section with a beanie on. He walked around each aisle and couldn’t come up with anything that a baby could need. Diapers all had different sizes and he was too lazy to return it, then wipes; what if they were allergic to it and got a rash? He wouldn’t be responsible for something like that, now he was left confused.

That’s when he thought back to him as a baby, most photos he’d seen of him as a child would have scratches all over his face. When he asked his parents why they didn’t get him mittens, they said they did but he’d either throw a tantrum or chew them until they came off.

After scanning each aisle, he finally found mittens and in a pack of two, lucky for him as they were the last pack. As he was reaching to get them, another hand bumped into him, which he quickly retreated.

“Ah, sorry about that, I didn't see you the-“ he put his hands up in defense and turned to look at the person in shock. He’d recognise that face anywhere, then again who wouldn’t.

“Katsuki?”

”Shouto?”

Shouto stared at him in shock and quickly brought his hand that was reaching for the mittens, back to caress a small figure tied to his chest. Was that…a baby? That’s when he took in the full picture of Shouto: a small baby strapped to his chest, layers of cloth hung on him and then his face. It was so pale, almost sickly looking, his cheekbones were defined unlike his usual roundness and the dark bags that hung under his eyes. Then there was the baby, small and quiet with its legs scrunched up against Shouto’s chest. The only noise coming from the baby was a wet sound, that’s when he could see the baby suckling on its fist. It seemed it was doing it to soothe itself as it was fast asleep and hadn’t once tried to open its eyes.

“Who’s baby- where have you-” He couldn’t get the words out as quickly as his mind said them, the only thing that could come out of his mouth shocked even him. “You cheated on me?”

As soon as it left his mouth, he regretted it. If not for the award silence then it was for the way Shouto’s face dropped in disbelief.

“Ho-how could you even say that?” Katsuki could see he was on the verge of tears, he couldn’t let that be the face he’d see on him after nearly a year of not seeing it.

“I didn’t mean it like that, jus- just who’s baby is that?”

“She’s mine, well my friends but i’m looking after her for a while.”

“Ah, sorry I didn't mean to assume please forgive me Sho.”

“It’s whatever, i’m not bothered by your comment. May I ask why you’re here?”

“Why am I here? For baby stuff obviously isn’t that what this store is for?”

“Yeah I know that, but who’s baby are you shopping for?” Katsuki could see the distress on Shouto's face begin to form, “I-is it for yours, are you having a baby with someone?”

“Of course not, dumbass. I’m here for my friends' kids that are visiting.” He was glad he cleared that before Shouto began making assumptions, “Actually, since you probably know more than me what’s best to get for twin babies?”

“Oh, um I'm still new to this kind of thing, actually she’s only just turnt two months. But for twins I'd recommend something simple, maybe matching outfits?”

“It’s a boy and a girl so I don't think that’d work.”

“Hmm, so maybe a baby blanket for each? Blankets can get used for years and it’s good if they each have their own.”

“That’s actually smart, wasn’t expecting that from you haha,” he could see Shouto do his signature pout that made him laugh. This felt so… normal. Relaxed even. He’d been worrying about how Shouto would react to seeing him, all for nothing. “Did you still need the mittens?”

“Yes, I've searched everywhere for them but I only recently remembered this place so I decided to come here.” Katsuki picks up the mitten pack and hands it to Shouto, their fingers grazing one another that it almost makes him nervous. “She likes to pull at her hair alot and suck her thumb, so I'd rather stop the habit now and thank you, Katsuki.”

Katsuki took in the parts he could see of the baby, she was on the small side of a 2 month old he realised. He would know, after working in the NICU for his probation after destroying a few too many buildings. A few hardly noticeable patches on her hair that were thin which he assumed that’s what Shouto had been referring to earlier with the hair pulling. It was barely noticeable as her hair was a light blonde, almost blending in with her complexion. It looked soft, he began reaching to touch her before he stopped himself.

“Can I? It’s okay, I'm clean. I made sure to shower before leaving work.”

“Sure, she’s a deep sleeper anyways she won’t feel a thing,” that signaled Katsuki to take off his gloves.

When his fingers grazed her head, he instantly fell in love. It was so soft and warm, the movement from her suckling could be felt on her head as her jaw moved. He could feel Shouto’s eyes on him as he began fiddling with her ears.

“She does that when she’s tired too,” Katsuki looked at him confused, “Playing with her ears, I assume it soothes her.”

“She’s a cute kid, you know how long you’re keeping her for?”

“It’s not determined yet, they are still looking to see if she has any relatives locally. As her mother died during childbirth and there’s no father in the picture so I offered to take care of her. I owe her mother for saving my life, this was the least I could do.”

If not, does that mean Shouto would have to keep her? That's a lot for one person, especially one of the top heroes by themself, that shits basically unheard of. Katsuki couldn’t help but compare Shouto’s situation to Kirishimas; he’s all alone in this, to the point he’s left work but the stress itself reflects on his body.

Their conversation lasted barely ten minutes, but to Katsuki it felt like he could repeat it for a lifetime if it meant he could stay with Shouto. But their time was cut short due to the baby beginning to get agitated and beginning to fuss. Shouto’s reason for leaving the house in the first place, was to calm the baby as apparently walks put her to sleep. That small encounter they had, he was forever grateful as he and Shouto had exchanged numbers with Shouto apologising as he doesn’t have time to check his messages anymore with the baby and all. And that he wasn’t intentionally ignoring him, he felt like he was crossing the line when asking if he could visit him and the baby. To his surprise Shouto agreed, but told him not to force himself if he didn’t have the time, with him being a full time top ten hero.

Katsuki didn’t care.

He’d make time.

~ ⋆ ̊ ⋆୨♡୧⋆ ̊ ⋆ ~

The thing with Shouto is that he didn’t want to break up with Katsuki, never once had he thought about it until the night prior.

They were making love, one of the rare chances they got with their schedules being almost polar opposites. It was never not passionate, Katsuki always took his time with him. Slowly, taking him apart piece by piece until he was drowning in lust and the only thing on his mind was those red eyes that stared lovingly into his own. But Katsuki that night crossed a line Shouto didn’t even know he had. It was a small comment with no intention of offending him, he knew that.

But it did.

It hadn’t been the first time Katsuki had said it but this time, it had hit him right where it hurt.

“Ah- hah, Sho you’re so fucking -ah tight it’s like you’re sucking me in,”

“Katsuki go -hah faster, i’m close,”

“Let’s come together, i’m nearly there,”

“I can feel you getting big? Katsuki don’t you dare fucking hah- knot me,”

“Please Sho, just tonight hah- i wanna be close to you,”

“Fine but go harder, I need to feel you,” he wrapped his legs tighter around Katsuki's waist and pulled him in for a kiss.

Katsuki combed his finger through Shouto’s hair and pulled it back to gain better access to his neck, leaving love bites all over his collarbone. But Shouto could tell he was getting close, he was doing slow but deep strokes as he panted heavily near his ear.

“Sho, Sho I'm close. So fucking close, just hold me baby,”

“Kats, hurry up i can’t hold it any longer can you -agh ah,” he could feel himself reaching his climax as his dick was grabbed and pumped by Katsuki slicked up hand.

“Sho, i’m going to fuck you so deep that i’ll put a baby in you, you’re so wet like an omega in heat -hah,” Katsuki mind began to get foggy as he felt his knot buldge at Shouto’s rim.

Shouto was laid still at the comment, a baby? He could tell Katsuki wasn’t thinking straight as he collapsed on top of him, kissing all over him. Shouto held him tight to his chest until his orgasm died down, patting his head softly. Katsuki rearranged them, until his back rested against his chest. His heartbeat was fast against his back, but the room was silent except their breaths mixing together trying to catch their breath.

He felt shivers down his spine as Katsuki licked his mating mark that he had given him on their 3rd anniversary; that area was still sensitive even now. But for them stuff like that didn’t really mean anything, except to show the world that they belonged together. They’d never go full out and party as they liked their own space with it just being them.

Being a beta he’d rarely pick up on scents, unless that person was either in rut or heat. But he’d felt after he got the mating mark, he could smell everything about Katsuki: from his change of his emotions, to his pre-rut stage and even his calm scent that sometimes made him sleepy. Katsuki wrapped his arms around him and pushed his hair out of his face to whisper into his ear.

“I love you Sho, so much you don’t understand,” he chose not to respond and act silent because he felt like if he even opened his mouth he would start crying.

But over what?

Katsuki knows he can’t have a baby so why would it matter?

“Sho?” He braced his arm over Shouto to take in his relaxed features, “You bastard, always falling asleep in the worst moments.”

After a few minutes, with Shouto confirming he had fallen asleep he pulled Katsuki out of him as he went to the bathroom to break down in tears. It’s not like they hadn’t discussed this before they started dating, it was one of the main reasons they didn’t start dating until their 3rd year. With him being a beta and Katsuki being an alpha it typically didn’t go well, he always knew he could never give Katsuki a family as he wanted. But Katsuki always reassured him that he only wanted him and that he was more than enough. But lately it seemed the opposite. Katsuki would always bring up how their friends were settling down and having their own families, he knew he didn’t do it purposely to hurt Shouto.

He never would.

But Shouto wouldn’t deny that it was getting to him, seeing how Katsuki interacts with kids when on duty. One time his explosion was so powerful, it had sent a kid's ice cream flying, but Katsuki immediately went to reassure the kid and bought him two ice cream cones instead of one. The child immediately smiled at him with so much love that Shouto couldn’t help but to do the same. His boyfriend was perfect, in each and every way without even knowing (he’d never tell him that with his ego being high enough). Whenever they’d go to a gender reveal, he would go all out on buying baby stuff and each event he’d have a basket full signed from him and Shouto. Even though only Katsuki picked out the stuff, he'd always make sure he never left Shouto out of the mix.

Before going to sleep he made sure that he had no tear marks on his face, Katsuki would always notice little things about him… After he iced his eyelids, he set out a warm flannel and towel and cleaned Katsuki off then himself and laid back down in the bed. Almost instinctively, he was pulled into a tight hug with legs entangling with his own and lips pressed to the back of his neck. He fell asleep instantly.

The following morning, he’d woken up to an empty bed but the smell of breakfast lingered from the opened door. After he’d mustered up enough energy, he lunged himself out of bed and followed the smell of fresh eggs. The view would never get boring; Katsuki in only underwear with his merchandised apron tied tightly around his waist with multiple saucepans in front of him.

“Seems like the princess decided to get up, what smoothie did you want? I did strawberry and banana and then a blueberry and kiwi one,” he plates their food, bringing it along with the smoothies to place in front of him.

“Strawberry and banana please, pass the butter as well.”

“Seems someone knows how to actually speak in full sentences in the morning, wow,” Katsuki walked to stand in front of him and place his hand to his forehead, “You sure you're not sick?”

“No, I'm just tired of this,” Katsuki sat across from him as he stuffed a fork full of eggs into his mouth.

“Tired of what Sho, did i tire you out that much last night?” he smirked as to get a reaction out of him.

“I’m tired of us, Katsuki,” he’s never seen Katsuki sit so still and quietly in all 8 years of knowing him.

It was eerie.

“EH? What do you mean Sho? Where did this come from?” he lowered his fork and stared almost as if he was shocked-still.

“I meant exactly what I said. I’m tired of us, let’s end this and break up.”

“What the fuck? Where the fuck is this coming from?” Shouto could smell Katsukis anger rising.

“I know it’s the typical one-liner but Katsuki, I can't give you everything you want in this thing we’ve got going on. It's me, not you and It’s best if we put an end to this now before we both get hurt in the end.”

“There’s not one thing wrong with you, can’t we talk about this properly? Don’t just cut me off like that without an explanation.”

“There’s nothing more to say Katsuki, we’re done.”

“What?” Shouto could see the distress written all over him as he clenched his hands, with his tears overflowing but not falling.

“I can move out by next week, i’ll stay with Hanta since he’s got a spare ro-“

“Slow down Sho, you’re actually fucking serious about this? About us?”

Being truthful to himself, he wasn’t sure about it at all but what he was sure about was that what Katsuki truly wanted in a relationship. He couldn’t give. And he’d never hold him back, not for his own selfish desires of wanting a relationship.

“Yes, I am serious.”

They sat in an awkward silence until they both finished their food and smoothies - oh how he was going to miss these. He washed as Katsuki dried, after they had cleaned and packed everything away, that's when Katsuki broke the silence.

“I’ll move out,” Shouto couldn’t see his face with his back turned to him and it made him uncomfortable. “You stay here since you’ve got more furniture. My parents want to see me more often anyways so I guess until I find my own place they can see me everyday. It’s a win win.”

“Oh okay, if that’s how we are doing it. Did you want me to help pack your stuff?”

“NO. I can do it my fucking self,” he walked out the kitchen and went straight for their bedroom.

Well he guesses he’d call it his bedroom now. Shouto didn’t want to end this on bad terms, he still cherished Katsuki as both a partner and a friend. He couldn’t afford to lose both at once so he followed after him.

“Katsuki?”

“What.”

“Can we still be friends? I don’t want us to end like this, our friendship all together.”

“Ye-yeah. Whatever, now can you please give me some space.”

“Of course, call me if you need anything.”

Shouto was stupid. Out of all the days he could have chosen to end things, he did it on one of the only days they both were home all day. It was a rare occasion, one where they’d usually do something romantic like go out on a date or even stay in and do a movie marathon together. He couldn't even begin to imagine how the atmosphere would be in an intense silence, so he decided to do the only thing he could do.

Clean.

Even after hours of cleaning surfaces he didn’t even know existed, Katsuki never once left their room. It made him upset that it had come to this, the only thing that came to mind was food. Katsuki loved his food, so he decided the best way for him to emerge would be to cook his favourite.

Spicy salmon rolls with ramen.

They hadn't done a restock for a while because they were so busy, so he decided he’d go out and get the ingredients and make it as a surprise whenever Katsuki decided to leave their room.

“Katsuki, i’m just going to the shop but i’ll be back.”

He didn’t receive a response so he took that as for him to get back as soon as possible. But what he didn’t know was that when he’d return it would be to an empty house.

Katsuki was gone.

He didn’t want to overthink it so he checked around the whole house, all of Katsuki stuff was gone minus a few shirts. The ones he’d always like to borrow, like the one he was wearing right at that moment. The thing was that he wasn’t mad, he could never be especially not at Katsuki. But it upset him nonetheless.

He didn’t even get to say goodbye.

A few days had passed with him in an empty house, he hated it. It felt like Katsuki took the feeling of ‘home’ with him, his footsteps echoed every time he walked on the floorboards. The ones that Katsuki had chosen. The food he bought was still sitting on the counter in its bag, the same place he left it. He’d only ordered takeaway since he left and he could barely stomach that, nothing was as good as Katsuki cooking.

The following week after their ‘break up’, Katsuki had messaged him and apologised about the way he left, assuring that they could stay as friends. Shouto felt relieved at that message but as time passed he could feel some tension building between them. Not as if any of them would bring it up, they were both treading lightly on the situation at hand. But he couldn’t live like this.

Dragging Katsuki along with no meaning to their friendship, would only drag them both down and he only wanted the best for Katsuki. So he decided to slowly distance himself from him: replying bluntly to his texts, avoiding him in public and he even went out of his way to ask to change shift rotation so that they’d never cross paths.

It worked sadly enough, he’d never see or hear of Katsuki unless it was on an advertisement or the news going on about how he defeated twelve villains in the space of 5 hours. But that was enough for him, it’s not like he wanted to cut him entirely out of his life. Just to put enough distance between them that they didn’t rekindle their feelings.

At some point he’d gotten so upset with seeing Katsuki's name in his phone he decided to straight up block him. It was for the better both for him and Katsuki, so if he had to take the reins then he would.

After just over three months of not seeing or hearing from Katsuki, he’d woken up alone and in pain. A pain he’d never experienced before, he felt nauseous and ran to the toilet as fast as he could. The toilet was full of bile, he’d hardly had an appetite nowadays and the only thing he’d eat would be instant ramen noodles on his breaks. That Hanta always criticized him for but today felt different, between his legs there was a wetness. He moved his hand to touch the wetness dripping from him and brought it to his face to almost throw up again at the sight of blood.

Was he dying?

He couldn’t bear to stand again so he crawled back to his room and climbed onto the bed only to see it stained with his blood. Panic hit him as he reached for his phone and rang the last contact in his phone as he held it to his ear. After hearing the repeating rings, someone answered.

“Help me, i’m bleeding everywhere i think i might be dying,” he could barely catch his breath until the voice spoke.

“Shou tell me where you are right now and i’ll come,”

“Home, i’m at home please hurry,”

“I’m coming Shou, just stay on the phone with me okay?”

“Okay.”

He heard the click of his front door being opened and footsteps running towards his open door, trailed with blood outside from the bathroom. Someone shook his shoulders and only then did he realise who he called.

“Hanta, help me i can’t move,”

“I’ve got you,” he picks him up easily and holds him against his chest, “I’ve got you Shou, so just hold on really tight to me okay?” he guided his hands around his neck as he ran.

Hanta could barely think, the amount of blood he’d seen looked like it had been drained from a horse let alone a person. The taxi he called before he entered the apartment complex was outside, he clambered in and told the man to drive as fast as he could to the hospital. It would’ve been quicker to swing his way there, but he knew Shouto cared about his image to the public and with the state he was in. It would be tarnished. Time passed so slowly as he held him, he could feel Shouto’s arm slacken and his breathing becoming laboured.

When they had finally arrived, he tipped the taxi man generously and ran to the paramedics situated outside. They quickly took Shouto from him and put him on a stretcher and wheeled him in. Only then did he get a view of his face, almost as pale as a ghost with frost clinging to the side of his face.

He was sedated to relieve him of any pain he might be having but they kept asking him questions like what Shouto’s blood type was and if he was on any medication. Of course he knew nothing but his age and gender and things that he did know wouldn’t benefit them like Shouto’s interests and his favourite foods. All important things for him wouldn’t help Shouto get better. That’s when they took him to a private room and asked him if he was family or a partner, he was neither but he couldn’t leave Shouto by himself like this, so obviously he lied.

They opted to do an ultrasound as he was bleeding from his lower region so it was likely to do with his regenerative area. After lifting his top and pouring the liquid all over his lower stomach, they poked and prodded until a small blob appeared on the screen.

“Is that a tumor doc?”

“I’ll have to take a closer look to confirm, but if so we are lucky we caught it in the early stages,” he moved lower on the abodemen.

There was a loud pounding noise, going thump-thump right after one another.

“You are his partner, correct?”

“Yes?”

“Just to confirm, you’ve stated he is a beta as does his medical records.” He grabs the medical sheet hung at the end of the bed, "Is there any chance these could’ve been tampered with? As I can see here that all these doctors are home visits and none that have been registered to a hospital with supervision.”

Sero shakes his head.

“I can tell you this much, your partner is not a beta but a recessive omega,” Sero’s face must show confusion as the doctor continues his explanation. “Meaning that he doesn’t have heats and if he does they are very painful but his scent glands develop over time. And as he is over the age of 20, he should be reacting to pheromones as any normal omega would. Which would also explain why he is now ovulating and why this,” he points to the pixelated screen “ He has now fallen pregnant, to put a date to it I would say he’s approximately 3 months along.”

“H-he’s pregnant ??”

“I did just say that,” the doctor pushes up his glasses and shows an unamused expression. Silence follows, then urging him to continue, “I would recommend getting a private doctor, if it is within your budget, to minimise the stress on your partner and the baby as he has a higher risk of miscarriage.” The doctor wiped the liquid off of Shouto’s stomach, then began to turn off and put away all the equipment.

“Thank you doc, is there anything else we need to know?”

“I’ll write it all on his medical file so you can relay it back to your partner once he is awake, if that is all I will be leaving now. He should wake up shortly as the sedation that was given wasn’t strong and also take care and congrats on the baby.”

After the doctor had left the room, Sero pulled down Shouto’s shirt to cover his stomach and held his hand. Then he sat in the position for a few moments replaying the last hour in his mind. Shouto’s pregnant? With who? The only person that came to mind would be Bakugo, it matches up with a similar time from when they broke up and he knows Shouto wouldn’t be so quick to move on let alone cheat. Should he call Bakugo and let him know? Wouldn’t Shouto be mad at him? That idea was quickly deterred when he felt a light squeeze to his hand.

“Hanta?”

“Shou are you alright? Do you feel okay?” Shouto began getting up and swinging his legs over to stand up “Whoa slow down there Roki, no need to rush.”

Shouto looked around to take in his surroundings to realise he was in a hospital room, that’s when he remembered the blood. He moved his hand to touch his lower stomach and immediately relaxed at the feeling of no pain and not a drop of blood. The medicine they had given him made him begin to feel lightheaded, with the bright lights creating black spots in front of him. A hand squeeze relaxed him slightly, that’s when he finally got a good look at the person in front of him.

“Hanta did you bring me here?”

“I had to, you were covered in blood and your whole bed was drenched in it. I couldn’t not bring you to the hospital, I know you hate them but there was nothing I could do! If i had the option i would’ve obvi-”

“Hanta. Calm down, it’s okay and I'm okay so thank you for getting me here so quickly.” The tension in Sero’s shoulders drooped immediately and his panic was soon replaced with happiness.

“Ah, okay thank fuck cause i haven’t been calm since I got your phone call.”

“I apologise, I didn't mean to startle you. There was just no one else I could think of.”

“It’s fine, you know I'd be there no matter the situation but hopefully not like this one again.”

“About that, did they find out what it was? What is wrong with me?”

“Oh.” Shouto leaned in closer as if to wait for him to finish his response, after a few seconds of silence he decided to repeat his word.

“Oh?”

“Um, i honestly don’t really know how to tell you this and i know it might come to you as a shock as much as it did me because never would i have thou-“

“Hanta. Get to the point.”

“You’re pregnant.” The same awkward silence filled the room, with nothing but blinking eyes and fast breathing.

“I’m what?”

“Pregnant. Meaning that you are carrying a child.”

Shouto couldn’t even begin to understand what that meant or how that was possible. But he’s a beta? How is that possible? It must be wrong, but then again Sero wouldn’t lie about something so big especially when he knew that was a sensitive subject for him. That meant that he really was pregnant. Pregnant with Katsuki’s child after he'd just broken up with him.

“How?”

“It’s easier to understand if you read your medical file, the doctor put everything on there for you.”

He took the file from Sero’s outstretched hand and began flipping to the most recent page and scanning for the obvious. The words that stood out to him the most were ‘Recessive Omega’ and ‘High risk pregnancy’, so he truly was an omega. What did it mean by high risk? Was he going to lose the baby he had only just found out about? He couldn’t. He’d do anything in his power to keep the baby healthy and alive.

“Forgot to mention, the doctor advised you to get a private doctor due to you uh- you know being a ‘new omega’ or whatever. Since it’s undetermined how it will go, especially with you never having a heat it’s unpredictable how this will play out.”

“That’s fine. I’ve had my own private doctor since i was a child but chose my own once I was of age, he specialises well in this department so there’d be no need to find a new one.”

“Good. That’s really good then, not to ruin the moment but wanna get out of this room? It’s getting really stuffy in here,” he motioned for Shouto to lean on him as they made their exit.

After a few weeks of thinking, he decided the best option for him and the baby would be to move house. A fresh start for both him and the baby, and that there was only one bedroom and he didn’t want to move again too soon. House searching took him around 3 weeks for him to finalise on a house that suited his needs best. Two weeks into moving in, it was fully furnished from the flooring to the ceiling in each room minus the baby’s as he didn’t know how to design it. What do baby’s like? Would too many colours hurt their eyes? For him, he got headaches after looking at vivid colours too long but then again he didn’t want it to be plain like his childhood house was.

It was almost lifeless.

With the months that followed, he was solely focused on him and the baby and making sure they were both healthy and updating his doctor of his condition. After a few months of debating whether he wanted to know the gender, he decided to find out as in the long run he could buy all the stuff before the baby was born. Not that gender mattered to him but he’d rather have the room decorated and furnished before they arrived. So he waited until he was 4 and half months and called his doctor to schedule an ultrasound appointment at his home; he decided he didn’t want to let anyone know for the time being, minus his family until he was comfortable.

To his surprise it was a girl.

He was having a baby girl, but he didn’t know anything about girls… So he ended up reaching out to his closest female friend, Momo. Instead of speaking to her over the phone, he decided rather than repeating the same conversation multiple times he could do it just the once. The people who he decided to tell were his closest relationships he had built over the years; Hanta, Izuku and of course Momo. When he told them the news, they were ecstatic as they were concerned why he’d randomly taken a leave from work without reasoning. His father signed him off work as soon as he told him with it being his first grandchild. But he assured them it was to prioritise his and the baby’s health, with the line of work they were in there was a high chance for a miscarriage.

He opted out of telling Katsuki in the beginning, due to him being overseas and he wouldn’t have been back until the baby was at least a month old. As the months had passed, he realised he never wanted to tell Katsuki. The idea of telling him and Katsuki only being in a relationship for the baby and not for love, made him scared. As that was what he was a product of, not that he didn’t love his family but he can say that no one should ever suffer the way he did nor his siblings.

Then came up the conversation about names, he hadn’t put much thought to it originally. That was another stress factor added on that he couldn’t handle so he opted to name her when he met her, one that would suit her face.

Reluctantly, he accepted help from the others as they decided on visiting him in their free time from work and even sometimes on their short work break. They were spoiling the baby before she’d even arrived and that’s when it came apparent to him he was having a baby. A living and breathing thing was growing inside him and he knew nothing about how to care for it. Since he had so much on his hands after taking leave from work, he decided to delve right into all the parenting and baby books he could find.

Turns out they were useless.

Most of them spoke of ways he never wanted to raise his children such as one of the quotes he read stated ‘if my child didn’t finish their food they wouldn’t leave the table even if they fell asleep’. Now that made him sick how people could think that way and how it was labelled under the section ‘controlling eating habits’. So he kept things simple, starting with buying toys; toys of all categories and colours especially ones that made noises.

He hated silence.

His childhood was silenced.

That he didn’t want a repeat of, so with the baby’s room he decided to go all out and paint it pink, even the ceiling.
Soon after opening the first can of paint, he realised that he couldn’t do this himself. The smell of paint made him so nauseous that he almost threw up into it. Asking for help was never a problem as Momo loved to decorate so he left it up to her to do most alterations.

In his last stages of pregnancy, he would admit his patience began to wear thin and he got annoyed at almost every moving thing. To the point after the room had been fully painted, he thanked Momo and said he would do all the big projects once he was ready. The noise of people breathing bothered him; he didn't want to imagine the banging of a hammer or the vibrations of a drill. He dumped what he could in the room; everything was sealed in plastic as he hadn’t even taken a look at what he had bought. The cot he bought wasn’t a big worry as he had bought a second that attached to his bed so she would always be close to him (he knew he would be too lazy to get up and go to her room just to feed her).

One thing he hadn’t seen coming was his chest, it had grown in size and even began leaking small droplets of milk if he bumped his chest too hard. Though he’d already bought the formula that was recommended to him, 112 to be precise... At least he’d save money in the end, in the end he chose he’d switch between his own milk and the formula so it balanced out as he’d read that sometimes breast milk didn’t provide enough for the baby.

In the last month of his pregnancy, he could barely walk let alone cook to provide for himself. Takeout wasn’t an option so his last resort was his sister who was more than happy to stay with him until he could manage on his own. Honestly, he didn’t mind her presence as she was quiet and her smell was weak with her being a beta so she was the best option.

Then there was the birth.

The pain had never registered in his mind how much he had to bare just to give life to a person. It was planned months before to be done at home in his bathtub, he’d also read it shortened the labour time and that you’d experience less pain. Lucky for him (not that he didn’t have a high pain tolerance already). The doctor, his sister and Sero were present at his birth the whole time. The doctor guided Fuyumi how to help as he had to handle all the checks immediately after she was born. Sero was his support, holding his hand throughout and tying his hair back when he started to sweat profusely.

Thanks to his research, the birth was quick and almost painless until her shoulders began to breach. She was a loud cryer when she reached the surface and he feared that she was in pain. The doctor quickly reassured him that she was healthy and that she had strong lungs. When she was placed in his arms and he had taken a good look at her, he broke down. She was beautiful, with a head full of hair just like her father but fairer, almost a light blonde but overall she was small.

So small, he was scared she was too delicate to even handle so he held her close in fear of dropping her. When he moved her closer she began making small mouth movements which he noticed to be her rooting reflex. He held up one oh his breast to her mouth and she latched on and began suckling right away. Her hair was thick as he brushed his fingers through it and relaxed against the bathtub only getting out after she had been burped and fallen asleep.

Fuyumi soon took over, cooing over her red cheeks and small nose, rocking her back and forth in her blanket. Quickly, bathing and dressing her in an outfit that he’d picked out prior and then bundled up in a strawberry pink blanket. Shouto wasn’t bothered that he wasn’t present for her first ‘bath’, he was so exhausted after pushing her out and basically another child with how big the placenta was.

Sero helped him dress and clean the bath as he went to lay down with her against his chest. The doctor had reassured him that it had gone smoothly and that he’d leave the birth certificate to fill out when he was ready but for it to be done within the first month.

The name came easy to him, she looked calm and relaxed like her grandfather Masaru but when she ate she had an almost angry face like Mitsuki whenever she received good news. She resembled them so vividly, especially with the added blonde hair he couldn’t not name her after them. Saruki would be her name which he was also glad sounded similar to her father, Katsuki.

The baby was loud, he realised and would fuss over most things making it hard to know if she was in discomfort with a wet diaper or wanted to be fed. One thing that he picked up on was her cries, there would be this one cry that almost sounded like she would be in pain. Which he would assume would be a colic cry after all his months of research. From trial and error to try and relax her, the only thing that would seem to calm her would be a long walk outside.

Strapped to his chest, both of them layered in thick clothes due to the weather being cold and to conceal their identities. In those times, since she couldn’t suckle on his chest she would put her whole fist in her mouth and suckle and with the other hand play with her hair. Sometimes a bit too rough, as he’d find strands of blonde trapped between her chubby fingers. It’s not like he hadn’t tried hats on her but she’d rip them off within seconds and if she couldn’t herself she would cry until it was off. The next best option would be mittens, which he searched everywhere for, even foreign stores online. But he guessed because of the time of year, it being late December that’d they’d be fully sold out.

After she had just turned 2 months, he was out on a longer walk than usual, he came to the realisation it calmed him as well as it did her. That’s when he had realised he was walking in his old neighbourhood, the main road lined with shops from barbers to nail salons. The only shop that ever caught his eye was the store covered bottom to top in bows.

The baby store.

He had never been in there, but always looked in if he happened to walk past but it wasn’t as if he needed anything inside back then. It was like a dream that now he actually needed it, he quickly went in and took off the thick layer that surrounded him and the baby. The woman behind the desk greeted them with a small bow, he gave her a smile in return. Saruki tended to get hot really easily and easily frustrated and he didn’t want to wake her up after such a long walk. So he removed most of her layers until he could see the baby carrier that was tied around him, with her cheek squished against his chest.

It felt like he was in a dream, everything he’d thought of was in the store and they even had a whole section of hero merch bears. Including his own and Katsuki’s so of course he grabbed both, he wandered around the store for what felt like a few passing minutes but turned into an hour. He was so focused he hadn’t even realised someone had come in the store as the bell chimed, he continued on until he remembered the whole reason he came here.

Mittens.

He was certain he hadn’t stumbled across any on the aisle he had searched so he walked towards the bib section. To his luck there was a packet of mittens in a pair, with them being the last pair and he didn’t hesitate to reach for it until a hand touched his own. As he was about to apologise the person beat him to it and only then did he look up as he recognised the voice.

“Katsuki?”

“Shouto?”

Chapter Text

After Shouto had left the store, Katsuki was left to his thoughts about their small encounter. They’d had an actual conversation, with no tension, since they broke up nearly a year ago. It made his inner alpha senses heighten, not with the usual lust he held, but protectiveness? It was rare he’d felt that and if he did it was only if Shouto was in a life or death situation, which wasn’t that. The child maybe? He’d always wanted children to be protected and cared for since he was young; especially after being with Shouto and seeing how his past still affected him in everyday life.

If it hurt him to see it, he couldn’t imagine being in it.

A few weeks had passed since then and not once had Shouto messaged him but then again neither had he. What would he even say? How’s life going? Obviously hard with being a single parent, even if it's temporary it’s still a lot for one person, especially a pro hero who had no time to adjust. He was waiting for a good opportunity for him to meet up since lately his schedule had been night shifts, after he’d finished he’d be drained and pass out for the whole day only to repeat the cycle again.

Luckily his rota had changed due to him being assigned to train the new interns as of next week, meaning he had only morning shifts. Izuku was in charge of both of their rotas so that one of them could always be on duty if the other was not and it seemed like Izuku would be working the whole weekend. Meaning he had time to finally see Shouto again, with the baby of course.

He decided to message Shouto to see if it would be okay if he could visit on Saturday, even though he said it’s fine to show up any time. But it seemed that Shouto’s reply time wasn’t getting better any time soon as 4 days had passed since he’d sent that message with no response. It seemed it wasn’t only towards him as Izuku assured him that he’s been like this since he got the baby and that it was best to call him.

Katsuki didn’t want to call him, in case it startled the baby if Shouto had just put her down to rest or even worse began bathing her. He knows how Shouto panics whenever he gets a call, it’s either bad news or an emergency. Katsuki decided it’d be best to just show up, not without bearing gifts, as Shouto had told him it was fine to show up uninvited just in decent times.

Time passed quickly with Saturday being only a day away, he decided that since he’d finished his night shifts for the week and had had a full day of rest, it’d be the best time to look for gifts. Something for both Shouto and the baby, weirdly enough with the baby it came easy to him. Blankets, all types of them ranging from texture to sizes and there were also bibs. Babies always needed them, from how much mess they made just from dribbling on top of the food.

With Shouto, there was a lot to think about. He might've changed a lot since their breakup, he knew he had. Shouto didn’t receive many gifts but when he did he never had much of a reaction to them, always a smile and a small ‘thanks’. Shouto’s favourite brand of strawberry milk was always sold out, due to fans discovering his love of it. It got so bad till the point Shouto couldn’t have it for months, he got dehydrated alot of the time from forgetting to drink something that wasn’t milk, typical Shou.

Katsuki decided to go back to that baby store near their old house, the lady at the till recognised him and waved, he gave a short nod in return. The bib section was limited and what confused him is that even bibs had sizes. He ended up just picking the biggest ones, more coverage means less mess, is what ran through his mind. Blankets were easier to pick between than bibs, he just grabbed a double set which were both reversible and soft to the touch. Yeah fuck it, he’s got his soft side too.

After he had paid and bagged his stuff, he went home on the train with the bag placed between his legs as the vibrations from the tracks lulled him to sleep. Their old neighbourhood was quite a length away from his parents home, taking up to an hour without an extra complaining about something as stupid as a leaky toilet. He had decided that as it was a last minute move out of his and Shouto’s house and to reduce the added stress, he’d stay with his parents until the mission was over.

He wasn’t against renting a flat, so he picked one out that was convenient: having two rooms (one for an at home gym), a large bathroom with double sinks and a large seating area connected to the kitchen. It turns out that even after being back for 6 weeks, he hadn’t even started to look for kitchen appliances let alone buy any furniture, minus the sofa that wrapped around the living room and his king sized bed. Well deserving for a top pro, the only benefits he had was being able to spread out and not squished into one corner, basically hanging on the edge.

With his parents they didn’t complain, they hardly saw him before he came to stay with them and his presence seemed to ease their worry. Every time he’d return home, either one of his parents would be up, his father watching the news or his mother sewing a new project. The comfort it brought him to come home to someone was something he’d never been without. He couldn’t begin to imagine living by himself in an empty and lifeless house with the only noise being the humming of the fridge. It sounded depressing to put it simply.

The only time he’d been back to his apartment was when Kirishima and his mate came over with their pups, which had given him a reason to clean his apartment from head to toe. The dusk lingered all around, but once he had finished, all that could be smelled was disinfectant. He let it air out for a couple days before their visit, so it didn’t come on too strong with the newborns.

It took a lot out of him to be a good host, offering up his bed to his friends, meaning he had to sleep on his sofa. Not that it wasn’t comfortable, he only picks the best, but the room he had to spread out on, without risking falling onto the hard floor was something he took for granted. Lucky enough for him, the couple bought bassi- baby beds or whatever the fuck you call them, meaning that each baby could sleep comfortably beside a parent.

He’d learnt many things during their two week stay, one was to never leave his kid alone with Kiri; he was so boisterous with them already, that he decided to demonstrate how he could hold both babies in one arm each and do squats. There was obviously an easier way, but it seemed this man liked to challenge himself; he cradled a baby’s head in each of his hands with their small bodies on his forearms with their little legs scrunching up to him. It seemed they weren’t bothered by it, with drool dripping between Kiri’s fingers as they fell asleep.

Mina objected the first couple of times, but knowing her mate wouldn’t do something if it meant risking their pups safety, cheered him on. He’d asked a couple of times, if their babies had a lack of hearing as they could sleep through anything. One of the days where it had been hammering with rain, the dumbasses somehow decided the best thing would be to do karaoke. He joined in obviously, he can’t let karaoke go on in his own home and not prove he’s the best at it. They assured him that the babies slept through anything, as back home there was always something going on.

He wouldn’t tell them but he was grateful for their visit, even if it was only short, it was comforting seeing something so domestic in his home. They’d taught him many things that he may not even have the chance to use: like burping a baby, differentiating the cries between each baby and even how to make a bottle when they’d both be too hammered to do night duty. The twins were quiet and looked the complete opposite, one taking after each parent with a few features mixed in between. Both being easy to handle, and usually clung to him if he’d pick one up but usually not without the other as they’d fuss when being apart.

One of the things he swore he’d never forget, was when they both forgot the twins on the train and it had left without them. The day started as every other day since they’ve stayed, other than he had to go into work to collect some files, even during his paid holiday he had much to catch up on. It was meant to be a short 20 minute interval of small talk, then he’d leave but the nerd just had to unload a bunch of crap that happened in hero news.

Kirishima decided that it’d be a good day to see where his dear friend Katsuki worked, and suggested doing a bring kids to work day! Him and Mina both decided to go by train, as that was the quickest and only transport they’ve used since they got here. It wasn’t hard to find out where Bakugo worked, with his face plastered at the front of a 30 story high building on google maps. The stop just before they were meant to get off, had announced that they had a quick maintenance due to a flashy light. Kirishima was pretty impressed with how quickly Japan was on to fix stuff, whereas in England it’d take months to get fixed, if ever unless it affected it enough that the train couldn’t move. Mina had said since it would take a while she would head to the bathroom, she’d headed off after kissing each of their foreheads.

10 minutes had passed and yet no sign of Mina, it got Kirishima worried enough that he thought she’d gotten lost with the lack of english signs so he hurried off, forgetting the most important things.

Their kids.

The train started up and left, not even a minute after Kirishima had vanished and returned with Mina painted with a full face of makeup. Luckily Katsuki was just leaving work, about to get on the train when he noticed a commotion on the other side of the track. He blasted over to see what it was, only for it to be about two lost babies. Intrigued, he looked over into the pushchair and saw two familiar faces staring into his face with unamused expressions.

He assured everyone that he had it under control, taking the babies to the other side of the track using the underground passage. The pushchair was placed in another train, heading for the opposite direction, this time with Katsuki watching them as he let their parents know they were safe and could head back. It was a call of ushered tears and thank you's, he took in the compliments with glee making sure to never forget something on the train.

It reminded him that he was now at his stop, he picked up the baby bag and got off the train, heading for his parents home.

He returned home to his father, on the phone (a rare sight), with the phone between his ear and shoulder, both hands holding and stirring what Katsuki would assume would be his favourite curry. His father waved him in and pointed to the stove full of pots, in his words meaning ‘help yourself’ so he took off his shoes by the door to head to his room. He dumped his jacket on his chair so he could begin changing into his inside clothes, which was a vest top and a baggy pair of pants.

By the time he’d entered the kitchen, there were three plates layed out, one of them being piled to the brim of meat and veggies. It was obviously meant for him as his parents both worried about his health, especially after being in foreign country for so long, to the point his eating habits changed completely. It seemed his mother had arrived during that time, face full of makeup and heavy jewelry hung around her neck.The bag he’d left at the front door, to avoid questioning, was moved to be placed on the table right by his mother.

“Got anything to say boy?” His mothers face looked between anger and disappointment but to him either would result in shouting.

“Yeah, stop going through my shit. I left it at the door for a reason.” Katsuki pulled out his chair, purposely making the legs scrape against the wooden floorboards.

“Katsuki, we know you value your privacy as we do our own but something as big as this can’t be thrown under the bus,” Masaru placed utensils beside each of their dishes as he sat down.

“There’s nothing ‘big’ going on, if there was you’d know that you’d guys would be the first to know. So don’t assume shit you know nothing about.” They all put their hands together to their forehead and said a silent prayer before they began to dig in.

“No swearing at the table and anyways we didn’t go through anything. Didn’t need to go through anything when it was written in bold at the front of the bag.” That’s when Katsuki took notice of the bag, it was labeled in bright blues and pinks with the words ‘Baby Care’.

“It’s not what you think so let it go and let me eat in peace.” He began to scoff his face with the curry and rice, he could feel the silent looks his parents gave each other and began to eat faster.

After he'd finished, he washed and dried his dishes as his parents passed their own to him to finish. Leaving the awkward silence, to then sit in his own room to scroll through his old messages with his parents. They’d been distant with him since him and Shouto broke up, mostly his mother as she was fond of him. When he had told them the news of it and to ask if he could move in temporarily, his mother had all but questioned him about the reason behind their breakup.

He wishes he knew himself.

He relayed to them that it didn’t end on bad terms and that they had agreed to stay friends, as they got on well and had to work in the same line of duty. The distance between him and Shouto seemed to have affected his parents as well. They used to go all out on buying new movies and trying out new dishes whenever he and Shouto would come over. Meals used to be comfortable and joyous, now they were silent and full of tension.

It seemed like talking to Shouto would solve all his problems, all his goals he worked towards and future trips he planned to go to, all included Shouto. Without him, his future was unsure and unstable without having someone he loved by his side. He couldn’t imagine doing those things by himself, let alone anyone else, which left him stuck in time. The future he thoughtfully planned out, had changed. He began going with whatever came to him. Never looking forward to anything, never planning out a new hiking track he wanted to try but the hardest was that he could imagine ever getting over Shouto.

His first love.

His first everything.

No doubt, it was hard not having Shouto by his side as he had never thought about not having him. Even with their line of work, with their life constantly at risk he knew that they’d both pull through it. So to him knowing that Shouto was alive and well but not by his side, made him uneasy. The only thing that reassured him was the posts daily about Shouto, the fights he’d won or a new speculation of why he wasn’t working. It also comforted him, knowing that he was alive even if he was living without him. There was a knock at his door pulling him out of his endless scrolling of his ex boyfriend.

“Come in, old man,” his old hag would always barge in so it was obvious who it was.

“I don’t mean to disturb you son,” his father opened his door and slithered through the small gap, to close it behind him with a small click.

“Nah, you weren’t disturbing me. Did the hag send you here? I ain’t apologising for nothing.” He threw his phone to the corner of his bed as he moved to make space for Masaru.

“Katsuki, this has nothing to do with your mother but more about you. You’ve been distant ever since you’ve got back from your trip, did something happen?”

“Nothing happened, it’s just weird being back.”

“Katsuki, you know you can be honest with me.”

“Ugh- fine. I realised I want some things, my friends are all ahead of me in some way and i’m just here. Hoping for a miracle.”

“What do you mean son?”

“Settling down, finding the one or even having a family.”

“That’s a big commitment to make so young, remember that everyone goes at their own pace in life so no need to waste time thinking about what others are doing.”

“I’m not wasting my time on it if the only person I want can't even talk to me.”

“You talking about Shouto?”

“Who else would I be talking about? It seems that idiot has even started settling down, even if not by choice.”

“What do you mean not by choice? Is Shouto okay?” Masaru's figure stiffened against the headboard.

“Yeah, he's okay. Just has a newborn kid he’s looking after.”

“Oh. I am so sorry Katsuki, I would say congratulations to Shouto but I know how much you love that boy. It’s a shock that he has a partner and a kid so soon.”

“What? When did I mention a partner?” Katsuki finally turnt to to face his dad.

“Did I ‘read the room’ wrong? As you kids say nowadays.”

“No one says that Pa.”

“Oh?”

“The kids’ not his. He's looking after her until they manage to find some blood relatives to take her in.”

“What happened to the parents, may I ask?”

“Shou said the mother died during childbirth and that the father is unheard of. He feels indebted to the mother since she had saved his life before, so he quit work for a bit to look after the baby.”

“That boy has a pure soul through and through, I hope he’s getting some help. Being a single parent must be a struggle, you were a handful for both me and your mother.”

“Yeah he does, that’s why I want to help him in any way I can.”

“You’re a good person, anyone could see that son. Just know if Shouto ever needs any support, me and your mother are here too.”

“Yeah, whatever. Can I ask a favour?”

“Of course.”

“Do you still have that sensitive detergent for the fabrics?”

“Yes, why do you ask?”

“I need to borrow it to wash some of the baby stuff I bought for Shou.”

“You never have to ask for such things, just help yourself when you need.”

“Thanks, pa.”

After his dad left, he sat up and fell into his thoughts about his future. His future with Shouto, him and the baby, if he’d accept him of course but until he did he’d work towards earning his trust again.

The baby clothes were something he’d learnt during his time spent with Kiri and the twins, keeping only their scents in their space. The washing of clothes would introduce the baby that Shouto is caring for, to his smell, making it easier for her to adjust to liking it. He knew that he had to have the baby’s acceptance, otherwise he wouldn’t get far with Shouto.

The baby was so small, it scared him. To bring harm to the baby, even if it was accidental, sat at the back of his mind especially with one being so small. The smallest thing, such as a cold, could kill babies that small and he didn’t want to bring anything that could harm Shouto or the baby. So the night prior he threw both the blankets and the bibs in the wash, then air dried them until he woke up. He put them in the dryer to make certain they were thoroughly dried, then packaged them in a sealed bag he took from his parents' studio.

The whole morning he had the nervous sweats, constantly wiping his hands on a dry cloth to prevent an explosion from forming. He kept pacing frantically around until even his father picked up his unusual attitude but decided to not to say anything to make it worse. Why was he so nervous to see Shouto? What’s a good time to see someone? Especially one with a newborn baby…

He didn’t know any of these things, all of this was new to him, probably even worse for Shouto, so he chose for him to shop for some groceries he and Shouto would have for movie night. He didn’t end up leaving till mid day, once his pheromones had calmed down enough as they were so strong he had to change his whole outfit. The aisles were just as he remembered them being, weirdly enough not having been rearranged. There were a bunch of strawberry flavoured snacks and even some hero merch ramen packs. There was a spicy curry flavoured one, featuring his gauntlet
and a few explosions to show the spice level with 4 being the spiciest.

Secretly, he asked one of the workers if they had any of Shouto’s favourite batch of strawberry milk as he’d been seen so often by paparazzi drinking it that his fans had picked up on it aswell leaving it out of stock. But since Shouto being away from work it should’ve died down for now, by the way the worker blushed at him and gave him a whole tray it seemed she recognised him either as a Shouto fan or as Pro-Hero Dynamite, he wouldn’t deny that he was either..

The house he arrived at was far more average than he was expecting: it was a house with three floors, sandstone brick and long paneling windows. He had to do a double take to make sure the address was right that Shouto had given him, only to find out it was accurate. A few stairs led up to the white door, with a letter box over rammed with mail that some of them had poured over to the floor. It was only midday so the chill hadn’t set in yet so they hadn’t been damp or frozen to the floor, as he was about to pick up the last letter when he heard a cry.

It was the baby, he could hear Shouto’s voice trying to calm her down but with no luck her screams only grew louder until he could hear it quieten meaning he moved rooms. Katsuki knocked a few times not too loud enough to startle the baby but not too quiet to be unheard.

After a few minutes of waiting, the door still unanswered, he decided to try the handle and with his luck it opened and he let himself in. The place he walked into was the definition of ‘homey’, the floors were covered in a fluffy carpet all the way up until the end of the hallway. Walls plastered with each of their friend’s heroes merch, pictures of them in school and even a small one of him and Shouto before they got together with their arms around each other. The cry startled him out of his moment and he followed through the doors until he located the source, Shouto was pacing whilst soothing the baby.

The baby’s face was red and full of tears, mouth wide and toothless as she screamed. Her small tuft of hair was brushed into two strawberry bow clips, matching with her also strawberry baby grow. Shouto was rocking her gently side to side as he patted her back and ushered soothing words to her. Their old neighbour wasn’t wrong, he could smell Shouto’s scent even stronger now and he could smell sadness.

A lot of it.

Only when he stepped closer did the baby stop crying, he looked from the back of Shouto’s head to the baby's face. Only then did he notice she was staring right at him, still with tears running down her face, but her crying had stopped. It seemed as she was staring to take him in, looking at his face all around only to then start sniffing the air as if to sense him. After a few sniffles she seemed to smile, gums on show as she let out a small sound of joy it seemed.

Shouto turned to see what had amused her, only to wear a face of shock and fear of him. He took in all of him, his flushed face and sunken eyes but mostly his scent was strong and it smelt of distress. The clothes he wore hung from his body, putting his collar bones on full display showing how much weight he’d lost.

“Kat- Bakugo? What are you doing here?”

“I came to check on you, well you and the baby,” he settled the bag against the wall as he slung off his jacket and pocketed his gloves, “May i?” He gestured to the baby.

“Ye- yes, be careful and just make sure to secure her he-”

“Her head, yes I know don’t worry,” he took her softly and held her to his chest. She gazed up to him, in her features showing something close to acknowledgment and adorishment.

“If I knew you were coming I would’ve tidied up a bit more,” Shouto began scampering around picking up loose toys and blankets strewn around.

“I gave you the heads up,” he hooked one of the baby’s curls behind her ear, “If you actually read your messages.”

“I apologise again, it’s just all my time is on her right now that I barely even have time for myself.”

And it’s true. Katsuki could see it in the way he held himself, body hung over itself almost as if there was a coat hanger holding all his weight on a weakening hook. The bags on his eyes looked drawn out, making his scar look more prominent than it already did. His half-n-half hair looked uncared for, which was not in his nature, it fell past his shoulders like he didn’t know it grew longer.

Knowing him, he didn’t.

The baby began to wiggle in his arms showing a face of discomfort just before she started wailing like a banshee. Her face was all red, blotchy tears all over her cheeks as she fought to get out his arms. Fear, fear is what he felt as he looked up to Shouto for answers but it seemed for once he was as clueless as him in that moment.

“Has she been fed?”

A nod.

“Her nappy changed?”

Another nod.

“Burped?”

A questioning head tilt.

“Course it’d be you to forget one of the basics,” he gestures to a white rag on the sofa, “Pass the cloth over there.”

He flung it over his shoulder and began patting her lower back, watching her face to see a sense of relief. The grunting sounds she was releasing showed him that she was close. Within seconds, a gurgle came out with a big burp and some milk over his shoulder.

“There we go, good girl.” She looks up and gives him a lopsided smile, showing her little gums, Katsuki grins with pride.

Her head wobbles with drowsiness, Shouto steps in to swap the cloth covered in milk with a fresh one as her head rests against Katsuki's shoulder.

“Take it she was tired, just couldn’t rest comfortably,” Shouto whispers from beside him as he strokes her cheek, he hums in agreement.

Katsuki secures her more to his shoulder as she tucks her head into his neck, receiving a content purr from the baby in his arms.

“Thankyou.”

“Hah?” Katsuki says quietly as he turns around to see Shouto’s face, “I didn’t do nothin’ for you to be thanking me for idiot.”

“You did. You helped when I didn't earn anything for your kindness, so thank you. Again.” Shouto bent over giving him a slight bow.

“I don’t do anything I don't want to do and when it comes to you, i’d do anything Shou.”

They stared into each other’s eyes, Katsuki couldn’t take his eyes away from him. He was so beautiful in every form that he couldn’t look at him with anything but love. The baby snored quietly into his neck, he could feel the small brush of her breath that his hair stood up. Taking his eyes away from Shouto to look at her, she was so small but she had a spark to her with the emotions she wore on her face. Fierce and demanding with Shouto, who would give everything and expect nothing back, she knew she was in good hands.

There was a click.

“Ah, the kettle is ready, would you like a mint tea? Or a coffee maybe? Sorry, I don't remember what you like, besides smoothies.” Shouto stepped past him to head through the door behind him.

“I told you to stop overthinking with the small stuff, just give me whatever you were having.”

“Uh- the kettle wasn’t for a drink, it was for my hot water bottle.” Katsuki gave him a questioning head tilt, urging him to continue, “I get cramps from time to time and don’t want to strain my quirk with how much energy I have nowadays.” Shouto hovered his hands over his lower stomach as he spoke.

“Just a coffee then, black.”

Shouto shoots off to the kitchen but not without him catching a blush on his cheeks, he looks down to the baby held in his arms. Sakura? No, Saruki had a sweet smell to her. It’s like she smelt like home; he couldn't put words to it, maybe Shouto’s increase in phermenomes have rubbed off on her. He unzipped his jacket, trying not to disturb her as he carefully sat on the sofa. Reaching for his bag, he pulled out one of the blankets he had gotten for her and rested it over her as he pats her back.

Saruki, huh? He liked it, it had a nice ring to it and it suited her round face like a monkey's cheeks. If he was right, then her first kanji (猿) meant monkey, one of the animals Shouto was obsessed about, with the similarities it had to a koala. Both clingy shits. Then the second (木), meaning multiple things but usually the word element, maybe like Shouto’s quirk?

Knowing Shouto, he would’ve only given that part of the name as in remembrance of the child’s mother that it lost. Maybe having an emitter type quirk like Shouto’s, he would question him but didn’t want to bring up hurtful memories when he’s probably reminded everyday looking at the baby’s face.

Shouto walks in as he looks up, standing in the doorway staring at him with two steaming cups in hand. But quickly steps forward once they make eye contact, he places one on the low table but hesitates with the second one.

“Should I take her, so that you can drink?” he hovers over him carefully securing the cup with both hands.

“Nah i’m comfortable and i’ve got sturdy hands, don’t worry I won’t hurt her.” He can see a sense of relief wash over Shouto at his words, then sitting across him with his own cup in hands.

Hours pass by, they talk comfortably as if they hadn’t ever separated like that evening they missed out on the day they ended things. As much as it brings him happiness, he’s drowned in sadness about the what ifs. Shouto looked at him with nothing but fondness, that look that he’s always had when they were directed at him. He truly missed it but all he could do was welcome it, not knowing if he’d ever receive it again.

It gave him time to take in his surroundings, the gray plush corner sofa he sat on bunched up with baby blankets and pillows. An ottoman under the tv, open and full of nappies and wipes with a few blankets folded neatly in the corner. Almost untouched, he knew Shouto could barely fold so someone must’ve been here before. Family maybe? Or friends? There’s no unfamiliar scents he could pick up and the ones he could were quite faint, so it must have been Shouto and Saruki majority of the time. Everything was baby proofed, you would know a baby lived here by the first step into the room.

But nothing about Shouto.

To show he was here.

It seemed he wasn’t, mentally that is.

They spoke about everything they’ve missed: the mission, work, the baby and about the gatherings with their friends that they’ve both missed out on. Shouto never said a reason for it but he assumed it was the same as his own; he’d never gone to an event with his friends without him and honestly, he couldn’t face him. But seeing him now, brings all the worries and doubts he carried about their relationship.

There’s still questions.

There always will be questions.

From the start of the conversation he had taken lead, asking questions and commenting on little things that Shouto said to keep it going. He didn’t want any less time with him than he already lost but he could see the strain Shouto was having to keep up with him. The responses he’d received would either be delayed or turnt to a light hum either in agreement or disagreement.

“I should probably head out soon, so you and the baby can get ready for bed,” he slowly sat up and adjusted Saruki's wobbly head more securely.

“Ah, I didn't notice it was even that late. She could sleep all day, through anything and not realise what’s going on around her,” Shouto rubbed his eyes as he gestured for him to pass the baby.

“It’s fine, I don't want to unsettle her more times than needs be. Show me where she sleeps and I'll put her down for you.”

“Upstairs, first door on the right. It’d make sense I tidy, since I know where to put things,” Shouto began to rise and clear the sofa.

Katsuki holds the baby close as he walks up the stairs and takes in all the scents around the house. It’s stronger the closer he gets to the room Shouto directed to him, the door is slightly ajar. As he steps in, he takes in the room; it’s lit up dimly with heaps of baby stuff piled in a corner. Nearest to what he can make out to be a master bathroom, is a baby hammock tied to the ceiling and the back wall. The bed is opposite him, as Shouto said, with a baby bed attached to the left side. He approaches it slowly and lowers the baby gently until she is on her stomach, he pats her back once she starts to stir, laying the new blanket over her. It takes him a while to settle her so he decides to sit on the bed rather than crouching, with how low the bed was.

Saruki is everything but quiet, he realises her presence as much as it brings comfort it brings noise. From her loud cries, to her noticeable snoring as he pats her back until she finally relaxes with her mouth wide open. He curls his fingers around her hair gently, the pale blonde wisps of hair going in each and every direction and the subtle white hairline blending in with her complexion. Her cheeks are stained a bright red along with her ears, he fiddles with them for a while until he ends it by brushing a white curl behind it. It hits him that he’s been up here so long, while Shouto’s been downstairs tidying.

Once he reaches the living room, he sees Shouto’s had all but tidied the whole place with only a few toys thrown around here and there. He decides to take refuge in the kitchen and wash the few dishes left in it, Shouto accompanies him shortly after and dries everything and puts it away minus the bottles. There’s a white machine placed next to the toaster, which he stuffs the six bottles in, separating them into small pieces and placing them into different compartments. With a click of a few buttons, the machine starts to steam up with condensation dripping down the sides.

Shouto catches him staring,“It’s for the bottles, it sterilises them of soaps and other bacteria that I might've missed.”

“Ye-yeah, I knew that cause what else would that big ass machine be for.” He dries his hands with a cloth and heads toward the living room with Shouto following.

“Are you off now? I wanted to thank you for today, before you left and didn’t get a chance to.” Shouto rushed out as he stood by the doorframe.

“Chill out, I am going but I wanted to give you something first,” Katsuki hands over the bags to Shouto, “I thought I'd get you a few things, as well as Saruki as I know babies are constantly growing.”

Shouto handles the bag gently, pulling out each item slowly and inspecting them and each time his eyes get more watery. Seems that habit hadn’t left him, always getting emotional when he’s tired, it seems even more so now with the baby.

“Hey, it’s not something to cry about, you know i don’t ever show up empty handed.”

“Thank you, I appreciate it and so will she, so will Saruki.” He sniffles as he rubs his nose on his sleeve, holding the stuff close to him.

“It’s nothing much, just a few things I knew would come in handy at some point.”

“It’s not just nothing, it’s the first thing you’ve got for ou-for the baby so it’s not just nothing. Thank you, again.”

Shouto bowed his head slightly, not without him catching a look at a few tears dripping off his face. That bastard really was tired, he should start making his way out.

“Well i’m glad you like it so much, I now know for next time to bring tissues along with all that you’re dripping onto the floor.”
He smirks as he gestures to the floor.

“Next time? You’ll come again?” Shouto’s face brightened slightly, his eyes having more colour to them and his cheeks turning red.

“Why wouldn’t there be a next time? Unless you don’t want me to, then of course i don’t want to overstep my- “

“No, you can come by, just call me. I’m not really prepared for guests, if you didn’t notice and next time I'd like to be.”

“Okay, I'll call you. Make sure you pick up, yeah?” Shouto gives him a firm nod, “If not I'll show up anyways.”

Katsuki heads for the door as he slings on his jacket and puts on his gloves, waving goodbye to Shouto as he walks into the cold wind. Shouto waves goodbye as he shuts it behind him, noticing the letters placed on the bottom step of his staircase.

Weeks pass by, Katsuki has conversations with Shouto both short and long and typically ends with a loud screech or cry of a disturbed baby. It seemed even just talking to him, sets his mood for the day as he’s told by his underlings that his smell isn’t as potent and angry as usual. The talks are about anything and everything so it’s always exciting where their conversation would end up. One day, it’s Shouto who calls first. It surprises him none the less but picks up after the first ring.

“Hello Shou, what’s got you calling me first today?” Katsuki smirked as he planted his feet on his desk.

“I wanted to ask something of you, you can say no of course but I've asked everyone else.” Shouto sounded desperate, even if he wasn’t he’d always say yes.

“Yeah, I'll do it so what place and what time?”

“Katsuki, wait a minute? You don’t even know what I'm going to ask yet?”

Katsuki felt his ears turn red, only recently Shouto began calling him by his first name. It feels just like old times.

“Yeah,yeah whatever is it you want to ask me,Shou?”

“I wanted to ask a favour of you?” He could hear a slight tremor in his voice, if he imaged Shouto’s face he would be biting his lower lip.

“Get on with it, princess.”

“I need you to watch Saruki for a bit, not too long just this evening. I'll make sure she’s asleep before you come and everything, all you need to do is monitor her in case something happens.” He rushed it out so quickly, that Katsuki barely caught on with his words but being with him 6 years and knowing him 8, it wasn’t hard to get what he said.

“Yeah, sure I'll head over in an hour, if that’s fine with you. Don’t want traffic to be bad when I'm leaving.”

“Yes, that’s fine, I'll be home! And thank you Katsuki, I owe you.”

Katsuki hung up the phone and smiled to himself, this was his chance to prove to Shouto he was here for Saruki as well.

Not just for himself.

Chapter Text

~ ⋆ ̊ ⋆୨♡୧⋆ ̊ ⋆ ~

Shouto was once again grateful for Saruki's slight outburst, it gave him a reason to escape the scenario before he had exposed himself any further. Meeting Katsuki wasn’t in his plan that day, definitely not like that. For him to be in his most vulnerable state, being slightly under the weather from being overworked and overstimulated by a loud baby.

His body was worn out, Saruki mentally and physically sucked the life out of him. The plasters on his chest, itched each time she’d rub her face to get closer to him as if she wasn’t almost skin to skin. As she grew, so did her
appetite, enough where she’d suckle onto his chest every chance she got. Something he recently had to adjust to, resorting to a mix diet, half formula and half breastmilk as his body couldn’t produce as often as she needed it.

The uncomfort the movement brought was hard to hide in the presence of Katsuki, with him being able to read him like a book. Their conversation had felt like a stopwatch running out of time, until his secret unraveled right in front of him. In that moment it was as if his mind was elsewhere, barely making eye contact like he usually would. Katsuki looked enamoured everywhere his eyes roamed but all that crossed his mind was if he would connect the dots.

There was a slight glint in his eyes as his eyes roamed to his chest, where Saruki was calming herself by suckling her fist. Shouto could see the gears turning in Katsuki’s head, then he could smell it.

Anger.

Pure rage.

“Who’s baby- where have you-” Katsuki stumbled over his words, he could see him trying to grasp for an explanation. “You cheated on me?”

As soon as it left his mouth, he felt something he’d never felt towards Katsuki. Disappointment. Is that really how low he thought he could reach? Out of all resolutions, the first he’d come to term was Shouto cheating on him? Betraying him?

“Ho-how could you even say that?” He could feel tears gathering, but he held back. The last thing he’d want is to bring attention to himself, let alone Saruki.

“I didn’t mean it like that, jus- just who’s baby is that?” The instant regret was slathered across Katsuki’s face.

“She’s mine, well my friends but i’m looking after her for a while.” He did his best to lie but to also put a firm foot down that he would never cheat, though it did roll off his tongue with slight malice.

“Ah, sorry I didn't mean to assume please forgive me Sho.”

“It’s whatever, I'm not bothered by your comment.“ He was bothered, how couldn’t he be? But it was best to divert the conversation elsewhere. “May I ask why you’re here?”

“Why am I here? For baby stuff obviously isn’t that what this store is for?”

“Yeah I know that, but who’s baby are you shopping for?” , Shouto knew it was obvious but why would Katsuki be here
if not for himself? “I-is it for yours, are you having a baby with someone?”

“Of course not, dumbass. I’m here for my friends' kids that are visiting.” But none of their friends were having children? Unless it’s new news, he had drifted from his friends a lot in the recent months.

“Actually, since you probably know more than me, what's best to get for twin babies?”

Huh?

“Oh, um I'm still new to this kind of thing, actually she’s only just turnt two months. But for twins I'd recommend something simple, maybe matching outfits?” He was put on the spot and as usual revealed too much.

What if Katsuki lined up the dates and knew?

“It’s a boy and a girl so I don't think that’d work.” Oh.

“Hmm, so maybe a baby blanket for each? Blankets can get used for years and it’s good if they each have their own.” That’s another thing he needed to add to his own list, this year's winter was harsh.

“That’s actually smart, wasn’t expecting that from you haha,” Was he implying that he lacked ideas? He pouted and looked to the side, it was becoming too comfortable.“Did you still need the mittens?”

“Yes, I've searched everywhere for them but I only recently remembered this place so I decided to come here.” Katsuki had picked up the mitten pack and handed it to him, their fingers grazing one another that it almost made him nervous. “She likes to pull at her hair alot and suck her thumb, so I'd rather stop the habit now and thank you, Katsuki.”

Revealing too much….again.

Katsuki watched Saruki deeply, like he was trying to get a reading on her. His pupils dilated the longer he stared at what little he could see of her, it made him nervous. Could he tell? Could his alpha be telling him to sniff it out? Shouto knew how unpredictable Katsuki was when it came to his primal instincts. He would scent Shouto like crazy after a rut and make him bed bound until he could only smell himself on Shouto.

In this moment he didn’t only have to worry about Saruki but himself too, his scent was unpredictable. His emotions had been all over the place and with him not being able to smell it much, he had to keep calm.

He took a deep breath.

As his feelings grew stronger, so did his scent, which was something he only had just been getting used to himself. Saruki moved from nibbling her fist to start suckling on his chest, it calmed him that her presence was doting on him. Katsuki took notice of this and reached out his hand before he stopped, hand hovering just over her head.

“Can I? It’s okay, I'm clean. I made sure to shower before leaving work.” Shouto didn’t doubt that and he couldn’t raise suspicions in saying no.

“Sure, she’s a deep sleeper anyways she won’t feel a thing,” that signaled Katsuki to take off his gloves.

When his fingers grazed her head, he could tell Katsuki instantly fell in love. He let out a small growl, a comforting one, one he thinks not even Katsuki noticed he was doing. The movement from her suckling could be felt on his chest as her jaw moved. Katsuki's hands were anything but small, his whole hand cradled her head even his fingers covered her face. Shouto noticed him rubbing her ear between two of his fingers, causing her to stop nibbling on him.

“She does that when she’s tired too,” Katsuki looked at him confused, “Playing with her ears, I assume it soothes her.”

“She’s a cute kid, you know how long you’re keeping her for?” The first part warmed his inner omega, enough that he almost purred but he had to give as little information as he could.

“It’s not determined yet, they are still looking to see if she has any relatives locally. As her mother died during childbirth and there’s no father in the picture so I offered to take care of her. I owe her mother for saving my life, this was the least I could do.”

Shouto thought of it last minute after he had Saruki, with Shinsou adopting a kitten with a similar story line, which was easy to adapt to. Minus him not finding her on the side of the road, in a cardboard box and drenched to the bone. It was stressful to keep it up, as people tended to ask more questions. Hopefully, Katsuki wouldn’t because he had nothing further than that child’s tale.

Their conversation lasted barely ten minutes, but to Shouto it couldn’t go any slower. The tension was building on him and he couldn’t yet sense his own pheromones, so not knowing whether he was releasing them put Shouto on edge. But their time was cut short due to the baby beginning to get agitated and beginning to fuss. Shouto’s reason for leaving the house in the first place was to calm the baby as walks tended to put her to sleep.

This reminded him that he had to find a way to keep Katsuki off of Izuku and questioning him, sooner or later Izuku would slip up and not to his own faults. If your best friend was having your childhood friend's child without them knowing, he probably wouldn’t be able to keep it in either. It was a burden he didn’t want to leave on Izuku and to keep lying to Katsuki's face everyday.

Shouto opted to give him his number, not only to keep his suspicions off of Izuku but also to ensure Katsuki would have no excuse to ask anything about him or Saruki, when he could himself.

He made it appear to Katsuki that his focus was mostly on Saruki, not other things so he wouldn’t expect great replies from him. Then Katsuki asked a question so forward he had to take a mental step back, it wasn’t unusual for him
to be so forward but it was unexpected.

Katsuki asked to see him, both him and Saruki.

The thought scared him but also comforted him, even without the knowledge of her being his daughter he wanted to spend time with her. Shouto couldn’t say no, he was already shutting him out he couldn’t turn him away too. But the expression Katsuki wore on his face, says he would persist until he'd said yes.

But he also didn’t want him to throw away the only free time he had on Saruki, being the number 8 hero couldn’t be easy. Shouto didn’t want to push him away, but he also didn’t want Katsuki to get too close, too soon.

~ ⋆ ̊ ⋆୨♡୧⋆ ̊ ⋆ ~

This time it was Shouto who welcomed him in, rather than himself, fully dressed in a suit that outlined his figure well. The house was quiet from what he could hear, meaning that Shouto had kept to his word and had put the baby to sleep. Just from looking at him, you could tell that the day had already taken a strain on him, now he’d had to work through the night. Katsuki would trade places with him in a second, if it could mean Shouto wasn’t wearing sunken eyebags before sundown.

“Hello Katsuki, come in. Again, sorry to ask this of you, it's only because you were the only one that picked up.” Shouto moved to the side to let him through.

“Shou, what have I told you about apologising about things you shouldn’t be sorry for?” He slung off his bag to hang on one of the many empty hooks.

“Sor- thankyou, i’ve written a few things that if she unsettles what it could be and if at any time you can’t handle her just call me back. Promise me.” Shouto tightened his tie tightly then handed him a sheet of paper.

“Yes, I'll call you if I need to, which I won't because I can handle anything. So stop worrying your stupid little head, like you said she can sleep through anything.” He was nervous, but he couldn’t let Shouto know that or he’d never leave.

“Thank you, let me just say goodbye to her.” Shouto turned the corner into the living room, he followed and watched his careful movements.

The baby was snuggled up tightly in a cloth, arms bundled to her sides with her mouth open and snoring softly. Shouto crouched down, placing a few kisses on her nose, saying sweet words to her that Katsuki couldn’t pick up with how far he watched from. Her nose twitched slightly, her lips then parting to show a gummy smile even in her sleep.

Katsuki didn’t realise it but it seemed Shouto did.

His inner alpha was purring, a small thrilling sound at the back of his throat as he watched the scene go on. The way Shouto was so gentle and caring, enough to get a reaction out of a sleeping baby said a lot. The little girl was in good hands, even if it was temporary he knew she would go on with Shouto’s love.

Shouto blushed when he realised he’d been caught, avoiding eye contact and stumbling upwards, quickly but quietly past him to put on his shoes. Katsuki opened the door for him, passing him his bag as Shouto turned back to him, cheeks flushed.

“Come back home, safe,” the cold wind brushed his cheek, Shouto’s hair blowing with it.

“Keep her safe, until I'm home,” Shouto smiled and turned to leave down the steps and onto the streets until he was out of his eye range.

He closed the door and turnt back to the warmth.

The house was quiet, filled with only the sounds of a snoring baby sleeping peacefully. Shouto’s scent was everywhere, it brought both him and his alpha comfort to be surrounded by it again. Katsuki removed his jacket and ventured in further to the house, he followed the carpet down the long hallway until he reached a glass door. The sun shone through beautifully, in oranges and pinks as he pushed the handle down and forwards.

A sun room.

The windows were panelled all around, even through the ceiling you could count the clouds in the sky. It was so open, he could see the whole sky from all points in the room. There were things strung around almost in a tidy mess, shelves were full of massive white bags and pots full of dirty brushes. It’d seemed Shouto still did have his hobbies, those pottery classes inspired him so much he decided to make his own.

Katsuki could see that it hadn’t been touched in months, with a thin sheet of dust covering every surface and there was a pungent smell. The smell of mold, the kind you get from leaving the glaze for too long and he located it just as quick as he got a whiff of it. It was placed next to what he would assume was a flower pot, one side having a massive slope going inwards.

It seemed it was Shouto’s last project as it was still sitting on the spinning wheel, with a toothpick laid next to it and that’s when he saw a few scribbles at the side of the pot.

9mth Saruki.

Katsuki looked further around the room and found similar ones around the room, all with the name Saruki with a different number before it. Up until the one he found with less of a slope, saying 5mth but with no Saruki next to it. He took a closer look at each one and noticed a slightly hollow section, similar to the size of a coin.

That’s when Katsuki caught on.

A baby bump.

Katsuki felt like he had come across a boundary he should have never seen, let alone knew. Shouto had been doing sessions with Saruki’s mother, up until the last month of her pregnancy. He could see the gentle touches of Shouto’s brush marks on the work, all around the rim and the hollowed belly button area.

He felt queasy.

Uneased.

Katsuki left the room within seconds, closing the door gently behind him as he circled back to Saruki sleeping deeply. Knowing that the only thing she had left of her mother was back in that room, the last thing she has with both of them together. It broke him that such innocence had started off to such a cruel fate.

She was snoring loudly, her mouth hanging open with drool dribbling down the side of her red cheeks. Katsuki crouched next to her bassinet, he grabbed the cloth that hung off the side and rubbed the excess drool. The small motion caused her to let out a small ripple, close to a content purr as she scrunched her nose. His inner alpha responded immediately, emitting a loud purr that vibrated off his chest.

He admired her closely, her rosy cheeks and how the tips of her hair curled upwards with her white hairline blending to her light blonde crown. Even her eyelashes were slightly different, with one being fully blonde and one being partially white and blonde. Her cheeks were full and round and even with being swaddled up, she was full of rolls even her little fingers were chunky.

The bassinet was mostly empty minus the blanket Katsuki had gotten her his previous visit, bundled up near her feet with an empty bottle on top. He picked up the bottle and felt a waft of pheromones, not Saruki’s but Shouto’s. The blanket was heavy with Shouto’s scent, mixed in with his scent, subtle but was still there and it smelt like home.

The bottle loosened in his hold as he held the blanket close to him, hugging it almost but also clinging on to something he doesn’t want to lose.

Shouto.

He adjusted the blanket to be held back by Saruki’s small feet and moved to the kitchen, bottle still in hand. The sun had settled already, with the only light being on reflecting off of her red cheeks. The air downstairs was becoming still and cold, so he decided to pick her little bundled up limbs and hold her to his chest. Warmth was quickly felt through his body, her breath fast and hot on him; he moved to grab the blanket and wrap it around her as he moved to go upstairs.

Light shone through the gaps of the stair railing, the stairs creaked under his footsteps but only twice. The fourth and the very top one made the loudest noise, he had to familiarise himself with this place as much as he could. Shouto’s room was the same, door open and a pile of clothes towards the back of the room.

It was warm, it smelled like home and he didn’t want to leave but it was Shouto’s home. It hadn't ever occurred to him that it’d never be just ‘home’. Saruki felt just right in his arms, small and dependent on him, something he’d always wanted but could go without if he must.

Having children was always in his books, not so much Shouto’s but he didn’t blame him. The weight he carried from
the moment he was born was too heavy to handle, it still was and it wouldn’t be healthy to have a child in between it all. Katsuki wouldn’t ever rush him, let alone bring it up for him to make a decision that’d impact both their lives.

This was enough, to be able to see and talk to Shouto was a privilege in itself, the hero industry was brutal. It would either end you or drain you of all the strength you had left, to be able to have someone he loved still here was everything. To cherish Shouto means he had to cherish her too and it came easy to him.

The bassinet was just as low as he remembered, his back had almost given out just by crouching. It seemed that all the villains that day, decided to aim for his back but that was just the surface of what he’d experienced. He settled her down and patted her until she suckled on her hand, he moved carefully to slide mittens on both hands positioning them at her sides.

He took it as an opportunity to look at Shouto’s manga shelf; he could recognise a few that Hanta had lent him back in UA. The series that attracted him the most was AJIN, all spines a different color and seemingly untouched. He grabbed a handful of the first few and moved to the bed, settling near Saruki as he opened the first page.

Hours had passed, enough that Katsuki was well invested into the 14th volume, when he felt movement beside him, Saruki was awake. Her little legs swathed in a thick cloth, he lifted her gently from the back of her head and laid her down in his lap. The swaddle was loose around her as he unwrapped it, her arms shooting out as soon as she was free. Then it was her bottom half, her legs pressed into his stomach as she stretched them out and wiggled her toes.

The relief she felt was a sight to see, she brought both her fists to her mouth and started gnawing on it, drowning it in her drool. He moved to brush them from her face and her hand caught him, her whole fist wrapping around half his finger. He purred at her gently, moving to rub his finger against her flushed cheeks.

The moment was quickly ended, by the sound of crunching footsteps outside the window. Katsuki was always quick to assume so he settled and waited, making sure his pheromones were kept at bay so as not to startle Saruki.

The sound of the latch coming off the door echoed through the house, Katsuki immediately stood up with Saruki held tightly to his chest. Shouto would always turn on the light when he came home, one of the habits he never let go of and would whisper ‘Tadaima’. All he could hear was rustling of clothes and hard shoes being kicked off, he sniffed to see if it was Shouto’s scent but it was far from it.

Another alpha, one’s scent he couldn’t familiarise himself with, the scent was off putting as the alphas emotions were all over the place. The light tred of footsteps got closer, the floorboards creaking meaning they were on the 4th step. He had time to assess the area and find a durable weapon, the closest to him was a wooden hanger. He couldn’t risk using his quirk with Saruki so close to him, she would be hurt in the crossfire. Another creak, they’d reached the top meaning they were right opposite him, behind the slightly adjacent door.

Saruki made a sudden movement too, turning her head towards the door and starting to wiggle out of the blanket. Katsuki rubbed the back of her head to try and soothe her, to keep her focus on him and not the danger that could be across from them. He should’ve realised earlier, kids didn’t know how to read the room let alone act on it.

She cooed towards the door.

The door swung open before he had time to react but luckily there wasn’t a need to as it was someone familiar. Black hero suit tailored to his body, with a mask covering most of his face and ears. Capture weapon slung around his neck and of course his purple hair tangled with it that hung to his chest, Shouto’s adopted brother.

“Out of all people, I wasn't expecting you eyebags,” Katsuki threw the hanger back on the bed.

“You’d be the last person i was expecting, especially holding a baby, by choice that is,” Shinsou removed his mask and capture weapon, putting it to the side.

“I’d only do this if one person asked, which is why i’m doing this,” he brushed Sarukis' hair out of her eyes as she looked up to him.

“Seems like she likes you, she doesn’t take well to strangers. I’d say that’s the one trait she got from me, I'm surprised she’s not wailing,” he unzipped his outfit and tied it around his hips.

“What do you mean, got it from you? Are you saying you’re related or something?” Katsuki moved to sit back down on the low bed.

“Not by blood obviously, but Shouto is practically my brother so I'd consider her- wait. What did Shouto tell you? I mean about Saruki.” He untangled his hair and tied it into a low bun, the binding cloth loosening and falling to rest at his waist.

“What about her? That her father is nonexistent and that her mother passed the moment she took her first breath. Or that someone like Shouto has taken this on, by himself. Knowing him, he hasn’t reached out for help even if this is temporary.” He stared into her eyes, and he admired her left dimple as she smiled up at him.

“Well I mean yeah, that’s one way to put it. This is all new to me too and he doesn’t need to ask for help with the people he has around him.” Shinsou sat next to him and brushed back her hair, making her turn to focus on him.

They both sat and admired her fragile smile, unbeknownst that one of them knew the truth whilst the others’ anger simmered of the white lie. She cooed loudly at them both as her fist grabbed onto Katsuki shirt, pulling at it as she bit on his chest. Shinsou snorted at the motion, urging his hands out to pick her up.

“That means she’s hungry, it’s nearly 3am. She usually has milk at this time, well a bottle.” Shinsou stood with her tightly to his chest, “Let me atleast show you how to make one before I go.”

“You on the night shift then, means you only got 15 minutes left so get a move on.” Katsuki urged him forward and down the stairs and into the kitchen as he followed.

“Well she’s a bit behind on babies her age but Shouto’s been told she will catch up soon enough,” he passed Saruki over to him as he took out the bottle from the steamer.

“Was she born premature or something? I noticed she’s on the small side but she’s still fat all around.” Katsuki adjusted her head so that she could rest her neck and lean on his shoulder.

“Nah, it was something to do with the pregnancy, the lack of pheromones from the other mate and probably the overall stress of the mothers pheromones. But I'd assume the mother didn’t know, otherwise they’d have the father around to ensure her health.” Shinsou boiled the kettle and pulled a tub of white powder towards him.

“That’s new to me, so because her fathers a deadbeat even before she was born it now affects the rest of her life? There’s no fucking excuse for that.” Her purrs were the only thing that was keeping him calm.

Shinsou decided not to comment on it.

“So she’s just coming up to 3 scoops of this now, you put 150ml of kettle water and you shake it so it mixes.” Shinsou shakes it gently with one hand as the other holds the lid securely. “Not too much, otherwise it will fill with bubbles and make it hard for her to pass gas.”

“You seem to know a lot about this, I'm guessing you’re around her a lot. But I don't pick up your pheromones here at all.” Katsuki adjusted her to lay back in his arm.

“I’m working most of the time or if not I'm away for missions, when I am here I try to learn as much as I can. So if Shouto needs me, I can be here cause she’s practically my niece.” Shinsou ran the bottle under the cold tap.

“Well at least someone is keeping an eye on him, I plan to be here for him and her until he gets fed up with me.” Shinsou hands him the warm bottle with a knowing smirk and shrugs back on his uniform.

“Trust me, Shouto won’t get fed up with you anytime soon. But I gotta go, they’re paging me in. Do you know how to change a nappy?” Shinsou moved to pat Saruki’s head as she suckled on the bottle.

“Yeah simple enough, I've done it hundreds of times over in the NICU when I was put on community service.” Katsuki tilted her bottle to keep the bubbles at the top.

“Well good luck with her, Shouto usually warms up the wipes before he uses them. She will probably scream until you put on the new nappy.” He releases his low bun and puts his mask back on.

“Yeah she probably will, she’s not quiet about anything she does.” Katsuki pulls away the bottle as she begins to fuss.

“Funny that’s coming from you, who shouts at any given moment.” He steps closer towards him, “I’ll lock the door behind me, Shouto should be back by 5.” Shinsou bends slightly to boop her nose and turns to leave.

Katsuki listens until he hears a door shut and a few clicks of a key being turned and pulled out. He turns his attention back to the small being in his arms as she spits out the bottle. Katsuki moves to adjust her, laying her head on his shoulder as he rubs up and down her lower back. Her small legs push up and down on his chest as she wiggles out of discomfort, a small but loud burp brushes past his neck.

He smiles pridefully.

“Good girl,” he holds her up in front of him as she coos at him and stretches out her hand.

Katsuki knew if he gave her even the slightest of excitement she wouldn’t fail to stay awake and stare at him. After a few minutes of burping her and being sure she was full, he soothed her back and paced around the kitchen. Tidying as he went, washing and putting the bottle to sterilise all with one hand.

Taking slow and steady steps up the stairs and sitting low on the bed, swinging his legs over and pulling the blanket up to his waist. Saruki clung on to his finger, he attempted to unwrap her chubby fingers but she resisted. He didn’t want to disturb her routine any longer, so he complied, letting her hold him.

~ ⋆ ̊ ⋆୨♡୧⋆ ̊ ⋆ ~

Shouto came back to a quiet house, with a lot more pheromones than he was used to. The faint smell of his brother lingered in the hallway, meaning he didn’t stay long as he’d mentioned over text. Katsuki’s shoes were in the same spot as when he left, which reassured him that Saruki didn’t get too upset to need a walk.

He stepped out of his work shoes and hung his satchel on the hook next to Katsuki’s open bag. Work had over ran longer than he was expecting, making him worry he'd warranted Katsuki to distance himself because of his unreliability.

The layers he wore became suffocating the more steps he took, he slid them off piece by piece until he was left in his undergarments by time he reached the top of the stairs. He didn’t want to keep Katsuki here any longer than needed, it was more than enough that he helped out but he also didn’t want him picking up on Saruki’s scent.

His bedroom door was adjacent, with a small light coming through the crack meaning Katsuki had somehow managed to work his new lamp he had gotten in the previous week. He hung his uniform on the banister in a neat pile, the mixed scent of Katsuki coming from his room comforted him. His body relaxing immediately and urging him to walk in and sit beside him.

Katsuki was positioned slightly upright, his head resting against the headboard instead of the many pillows Shouto used for nesting. His upper half was bare, his muscled arms on full display as they wrapped around Saruki’s small body.
Her mittens hung loosely on her fisted hands, he moved to position them lower on her wrist. The positioning of his hold was perfect, one holding her wobbly head and the other holding her bottom. Both of their mouths wide as they both snored loudly and in sync, she really did take after him.

Shouto undressed, quickly and quietly as he knows Katsuki catches onto sudden movements and also wouldn’t hesitate to take a peak. The colours of clothing all blended in his pile of yet-to-be-packed-away piles, he grabbed the biggest one in what he could make out to be shirts. Once he had adjusted himself, he turned to look at Katsuki and noticed he was laying in his usual assigned spot on the right.

There was enough room left for Shouto to lay beside him but Saruki had to be put in her own bed. Reasons being he didn’t want her getting too reliant on skin to skin contact, especially with Katsuki. Then there was also the chance of both him and Katsuki rolling over and suffocating her to death, from his research it wasn’t uncommon. The thought of it scared him, waking up next to his lifeless daughters body with no sign of life in her round face.

He approached carefully and adjusted Katsuki’s hold around her, he was resisting slightly but after a few strokes to the back of his palm he relaxed. Shouto positioned himself next to Katsuki so he could just pass her over him without the added movement of him climbing in.

Saruki made a noise of frustration and started wiggling to get out of the awkward hold but he quickly placed her on her back. He rubbed her forehead up and down in strokes from her forehead to the tip of her nose until her forehead held no creases. Then he himself put his head on the pillow, facing her as she scrunched up her nose in defeat.

Shouto woke up to little grunts and movements, he rolled over to see Saruki fussing as tears ran down her face. She started to wail as her mitten hands waved around frantically, he sat up quickly and moved her to his chest. There was a reassuring hand on his lower back, Katsuki looked over his shoulder with heavy eyelids but encouraging eyes.

“It’s okay, I've got her. Just sleep, go to sleep.” Shouto swung his legs over the side and moved to stand up but was stopped by a tug at his shirt.

“I’m here, use me if i’m here,” Katsuki stood to move beside him and turn on the lamp.

Shouto didn’t reply but walked out the room to another, one unfinished but had potential written all over it. The walls were a light pink, from the floor to the cowlings with cecilia petals as a chandelier. Shelves were stacked on the window seal, nails wrapped in a bag to the side of them. There was a pile in the corner, packed high full of unpackaged toys soft and hard, the one that looked like they made a lot of noise. A built in wardrobe with open doors, full of empty hangers but hand painted teddy bears all along the back wall.

Katsuki could see the love and effort put into the room, but he could also see the time that stood still. It still smelled new in her room, it smelt as new as she did as if no one had stepped foot in here since she was here. A dresser with a changing mat on top, with a new package of nappies to the side.

Saruki’s wailing did not die down even with Shouto’s gentle rocking and soft pats to her back. Her cheeks were painted a bright red, all the way to her ears as her mouth was wide and loud with noise. She was set down gently on her back, Shouto holding his left hand to her forehead and she leaned into it. She started settling as he unzipped her sleep suit and pulled out a leg at a time, then unfastening her nappy.

It was damp, full to the brim even reaching some of the edges of the ruffles. Katsuki felt guilty, he checked but she was dry when he last checked but that had been hours ago. Shouto had only gotten in an hour ago, his shoulders were tense and his movements were slow.

He was tired.

Just so tired.

He could only watch, knowing he would only interrupt something Shouto had already been doing for 3 months. Each wipe was held for a few seconds in his left hand before he wiped, he remembered what Shinsou had said. Saruki was calm as Shouto wiped her down and pulled out the nappy from under her. He rolled it up gently and taped the sides around each other until it was secure, Katsuki grabbed it from his hands without a word. They were always fluent with their movements, not so much their words, so he could only watch.

Within the couple of minutes, she had a changed nappy and had settled calmly, enough that she had started to suckle
on her fists. One of them seemingly falling off during her tantrum, Shouto didn’t rush to take her comfort away only to bring her to his chest.

She nuzzled into him, and Shouto held onto her. Katsuki moved to bin the nappy that was outside the bedroom door. Shouto turned at the moment, seemingly only just noticing Katsuki presence and he turned his head. To anyone his face would be hard to read: to him he knew the movement of his eyes, the pinch of his cheeks and the scrunch of his nose.

He was upset.

Holding back tears.

Katsuki tested the waters and took a step forward, Shouto didn’t take one back. He moved his hand and hovered over the small head held to his chest, clasping his fingers with his.
His other hand turned Shouto’s head, not to look at him but to rest on his shoulder as he brought them both in close to him.

They held the hug for a while, enough that Saruki had started snoring and blowing bubbles over her drool covered fists. Katsuki ushered Shouto in front of him, bringing him back to his room and to his bed. He took Saruki from his hands and pushed him gently to lay down, dragging the thick blanket up to his shoulders.

“I’ll take care of her, sleep.” It was the only reassurance Shouto needed, shutting his eyes soon after.

He moved to the hallway, bouncing her gently up and down against his chest. Shouto was struggling, he had witnessed it in his own eyes and knowing he wouldn’t reach out hurt him.
The small life form in his arms was important enough to Shouto, that he reached out for help.

Reached out to him, for her. But not for himself.

He didn’t know how long he stood there but it was long enough that his feet started getting pins and needles. Saruki was openly snoring in his arms, muscles loose but scrunched up to his chest. He pushed through the door, Shouto was deep enough into sleep he had rolled on to his left side facing toward the wall. Katsuki moved quietly, crouching low to the bed level to settle her into her bassinet. Rubbing her nose as Shouto did earlier until she relaxed fully, then sliding on her mitten that had fallen off earlier.

He clambered over Shouto, carefully enough not to make the bed dip and slid himself under the covers with his back against the wall. Shouto’s face was centimetres from his face, enough that he could feel the soft puffs of air on his nose. A loose red lock hung down his cheek, he hesitate but moved to tuck it behind his ear.

It was uncomfortable, he didn’t know what to do with his hands, they were held stiff in front of him. Unconsciously, Shouto had given him the answer and shuffled until his head rested on his chest. Arms scrunched up between both their chests, he moved his arm around him to pull him in closer, as close as a person could get.

Katsuki was the first to see the beams of sunlight through the gaps of the blinds, he yawned and moved to rub his eyes when he noticed his hand was warm. Warmer than usual, his arm was still wrapped around Shouto, whilst his other was under Shouto’s pillow. The moment he’d been missing for a year was worth the wait: the warmth, the soft snores and the mixed scents of them intertwined.

He purred, moving closer to kiss Shouto’s forehead and pulling him in tighter, his unguarded face as beautiful as he remembered. Shouto always slept deeply, sometimes having to be rolled off the bed to be awoken. So it was no surprise when his head flopped forward at the movement, moving to rest on his chest.

The focus on him was stopped when he saw a movement just behind Shouto, a wave of small arms. He moves to sit up slightly and sees those bright turquoise eyes staring right at him. It’s rare that he doesn’t have control of his pheromones but it seems he was so caught up in the moment of awe, that he had let it out.

She cooed at him, he grinned back. Her bed hair was pointed in every direction, that he couldn’t help but smile at it. Shouto’s body was relaxed against him, he knew he didn’t want to wake him after last night. It’s not like she was a hard child to cater for, she was quite vocal when she wanted to be held or fed and there wasn’t much else to it.

It’s not like Katsuki couldn’t be a dad for a day.

He moved his arms gently from around Shouto, climbing over him gently whilst tucking in the blanket around him. Saruki’s coos were getting more frequent, she wasn’t patient at all as she waved her arms more frantically for attention.

Gently, he hooked his hands under her armpits and pulled her to his chest and she immediately looked up and smiled her gums at him. It was like Shouto, he couldn’t help but give in to his pout but she wore an all knowing she was getting her way kinda face.

She was cute.

The list that Shouto had written him only ended up to the time 3am, meaning that he didn’t intend on him ever sleeping over. It was barely 8am, his usual timing of waking up and it seemed it was the same way for Saruki too. Was it too soon to give her a bottle? He didn’t know her schedule, since all kids were different and he didn’t want to mess up what Shouto already had in place.

But it seemed she would show him the way, as she started nibbling at his bare chest. It’s not like she was breastfed, but he assumes it's a natural instinct for her to latch on to anything close to her.

“Sorry but I don’t have any milk for you, Cupcake,” he whispered gently to her as he smoothed down her hair.

The hallway was bright, the window at the end bringing in the light from outside. She cooed again, turning her face towards the warmth and tucking her face in between the divet of his pecks.

There was a bottle of milk already pre-made on the counter, bobbing inside a bowl full of water. It was warm to the touch, almost perfect as he held it to his skin, he removed the lid and poured a bit of the milk on his skin. It was slightly warmer than he’d like but he had no room to judge as she started to reach for it. She gulped it down within a few minutes, burping as soon as she released the teat from her mouth.

She fell asleep soon after, tucking her face into the crook of his elbows as he walked back upstairs. The room to his left caught his eye, her unfinished nursery stood in front of him. He couldn’t leave now, not with her unguarded and Shouto knocked out, he had to find something to stay and if not benefit Shouto.

The room had everything laid out, the nails and hammers and even a few screwdrivers with worksheets next to them. A manual to each unbuilt thing in front of him, was stacked up on top of each other in the middle of the floor. He had to do something, it’s not like he wasn’t good with his hands and couldn’t adapt to a few pages.

Saruki twitched in his hold, he moved out the room and back to Shouto’s side to settle her down next to him. Her belly bloated and rolls on full display, she was healthy, the complete opposite of her carer. If Katsuki could do something as simple as build a few bits and ease Shouto’s day, he would.

He left as soon as he came, closing both doors behind him as he sat in the pink room. The most important subject was the cot, he got the hang of it after a few page flips and managed to finish it within an hour. By midday he had managed to leave it down to putting the bedsheets on, something he could do with his eyes closed. Before he had the chance, he heard a soft cry and quickly headed for the other room.

Saruki was fussing lightly, huffing and puffing as she tried to bite off her gloves. Shouto was knocked out, near enough dead to the world with the way his arms were strewn out. Instantly, he bent down and scooped her up with his left hand, her head resting in his palm and legs hanging to the side of his forearm.

He rocked her gently side to side, sliding out the room and back to the nursery. She fell asleep before he had closed the door behind him, adjusting to the dim light of the room. Katsuki got back to the finishing touches, one handed and swayed as he went, keeping as quiet as he could.

Her soft snores were comforting, not knowing just how her presence alone brought peace to Shouto’s quiet life

~ ⋆ ̊ ⋆୨♡୧⋆ ̊ ⋆ ~

Shouto woke up to silence, something he hadn’t been used to in months. The fear set in after the calm, he stretched his arms and yawned and patted around the bed to find his daughter. The blanket that usually rested by her feet was cold, and had a stillness that usually wasn’t there. Instantly he opened his eyes and sat up, her bassinet was empty and cold to the touch.

Words could barely form on his tongue, he threw the blanket off of him and stood up quickly and moved to the baby hammock. Empty. Did Shinshou take her last night? His nerves were hard to control since he had Saruki, her small unguarded body was so fragile he couldn’t leave her out of his sight.

His feet carried him around the room frantically, he threw the discarded clothes everywhere as if there was a chance she could be under it. Sweat pooled on his eyebrows, he wasn’t self regulating properly, he swung his door open enough that the hinges creaked. The light in the hallway was blinding, he was unfocused about where to go.

The stairs blended into each other, he attempted to steady himself on the bannister as he took slow steps. A slight misstep had him tumbling, each body part finally awake enough he could feel spasms of pain everywhere. By time he reached the bottom of the staircase, his recognition of his surroundings had started to make sense.

The living room door was closed, it was never closed. Jumping to conclusions wasn’t something he ever did, he bursted through the door and scanned the room. Empty. Saruki's scent was faint, had he harmed her in a fit of haze and not remembered?

He was scared, he was so scared.

The next location was the kitchen, he never left her unattended in there but with the way his mind was playing up, he could do anything to harm her. The knife block had a missing knife, he did hurt her he just knows he did. Carpet was the only thing he could get a good grip on, his toes curling up trying to find steadiness.

Picture frames reflected back at him, the light from the sun room hitting the collage of pictures hung in his hallway. He followed the light carefully, turning the corner to be opposite the front door.

Shoes.

Shoes that weren’t his.

Katsuki.

Katsuki had her, still here, somewhere in the house as the outside was too cold with the letterbox freezing over. Upstairs, he had to be upstairs. Shouto ran as fast as his feet could take him and opened the door next to his, a wide frame stood in front of him. The shortness of his breath made enough noise for him to turn around and look at him.

There she was, her whole head placed in his palm and legs scrunched up on his forearm. Dribble running between his thumb, she was snoring calmly and her unruly hair laid flat to head. Saruki was with her father, she was safe and calm and making noise.

~ ⋆ ̊ ⋆୨♡୧⋆ ̊ ⋆ ~

“Shou? Why’s your eyebrow bleeding?” Katsuki looked him up and down, stepping forward and around her cot.

“Saru, she’s okay? I didn’t hurt her.” Shouto finally caught his breath and collapsed to his knees.

Katsuki rushed forward to hold him, moving his head to rest on his chest whilst readjusting Saruki. Shouto’s body shook against him, tears leaking into his bare chest. Katsuki couldn’t do anything but hold him, and brush his hair down his neck to calm him.

The stress pheromones coming off Shouto were strong, the room felt suffocating the moment he walked in. He couldn’t begin to imagine what was running through his head. Sweat had built up on his forehead, meaning he couldn’t even self regulate in the panic state.

Careful not to make sudden moves he adjusted them, he shuffled himself so that his back could rest against the cot. Both of them in his arms, he adjusted Shouto so that his back was against his chest and legs wrapped in his. Saruki being held more by him then Shouto, but against Shouts chest with loose hands around her.

Katsuki wasn’t going to ask, only hold him until he was ready too and brushed the sweaty bangs of his forehead to behind his ears. Shouto leaned his head back to rest on his shoulder, looking up at him with doubtful eyes. Tears welled up on the corners of his eyes and blood dripped as Shouto bit his bottom lip in fear. If he couldn’t reassure him with words, he’d have to change something for once.

His words

“I’m here for you, for her and for anything you might need me for. Don’t you ever hesitate to ask for anything okay?” he rubbed his forehead gently as Shouto nodded back.

He truly loved this man.

Chapter Text

Shouto’s body was cold and rigid against him, his arms were tight around Saruki enough that it would seem uncomfortable if not for her purring. He could see that Shouto was smelling her, lightly rubbing his cheek against her hair enough that it started sticking up.

Katsuki was confused, only moments before Shouto’s scent was going haywire, almost suffocating the room with his pheromones the moment he entered. It was fear that stuck out the most, even without his scent he could see it with the panicked eyes and the sweat that pooled in his collar bone. Now he was calm, with Saruki held in his arms and Katsuki behind and holding them both for extra support.

The baby was completely out of it, drool hanging off her lip and snoring so loud that you’d question it was coming from her. Unbeknownst to what’s going on around, her body then shivered and it brought him back to the moment, the room was cold enough that the mirror on the door slightly fogged up.

He couldn’t make out what expression Shouto was making, in the mirror his eyes were pointed down but he could see it wasn’t in the direction of Saruki. Was he spacing out? Katsuki didn’t want to be the first to move, for Shouto to move off of him and not speak about his feelings. He could still feel the tremors from Shouto’s hands, he held them tighter and rubbed his knuckles to assure him that he’s there.

It seemed that that was a mistake, he was still watching Shouto’s face through the mirror opposite them and he watched him come back in the moment. Shouto adjusted his hands and secured Saruki close to his chest, he pushed himself up and staggered to his feet with uncertainty. The last thing Katsuki was expecting was him to walk out without turning around and even more so by not saying a word.

The door clicked behind him.

Katsuki ended up sitting there until his legs went numb, he couldn’t get a reading on Shouto at all, especially when he was with the baby. Before, he could read him just by a simple eye twitch and now he couldn’t read him unless it was written on a piece of paper. It was less than a year and Shouto had become a complete stranger, it was as if he had gone on the mission and changed his whole identity instead of him.

Eventually he convinced himself to get up and move around the house, the door to Shouto’s room was closed instead of the usual ajar door. He decided that Shouto wanted his space but he didn’t want to leave yet, not without knowing what was going on with him. There were drops of blood down the stairs and piles of coats at the bottom, he then realised that that was what he had heard earlier, that sudden loud bang.

Shouto had fallen down a whole flight of stairs and hurt himself and Katsuki knew it was a heavy fall with the scrapes all over his face. The stairs were the least of it, when he got downstairs there were piles of broken items and even more as he walked through the front room and into the kitchen.

The rooms downstairs were a mess, bits of stuff had fallen off the table and the counters and even some of the pillows from the sofa were on the ground. It seemed Shouto had run into them with so much force they’d fallen off and wasn’t able to notice his surroundings.

He decided to give himself a reason to stay even if Shouto didn’t, he tidied everything that was out of place and wiped every surface that held a layer of dust. Katsuki had been downstairs for nearly three hours and he hadn’t heard a sound, he assumed they were both sleeping. But it was getting late, the winter sky had already begun getting dark and it was barely 5pm, which was around when he ate.

Shouto hadn’t eaten since he’d been back from his shift, he practically slept all day minus the two times to change Saruki and the brief panic attack. It put the pieces together of why he was so slim, he usually had muscle all around especially with how he used his quirk. Then again he didn’t know how long Shouto had been off of work, he never asked Izuku for a specific number and it pissed him off.

It couldn’t have been three months, you just don’t lose that much weight in that time unless you were starving yourself. That was the last thing he wanted, he hadn’t been gone that long and he knew Shouto was a grown man and he could take care of himself. But Katsuki wanted to take care of him, hand feed him after he had cooked for him and to press kisses to each of his scars.

Katsuki wanted it back badly but with where Shouto’s headspace was, he wouldn’t even try to put it on him, it wasn’t another ‘problem’ he wanted to put on him. He could tell Shouto wasn’t coping with whatever was going on, it could only be the baby with her being the only major change he noticed.

But again he didn’t want to overstep Shouto’s boundaries, it seemed the year they’d been apart his walls had been put right back up. Till this day he still doesn’t know why Shouto broke up with him, he doesn’t know how to bring it up let alone approach it. Either Shouto had been thinking about it for a while or he just woke up and decided.

Was it the sex?

Couldn’t be fucking that, Shouto barely made it to the second round with how they went at it and he never complained. Their sex drive wasn’t high but when they were both feeling it they’d go full out. Majority of the time, it was when he was in rut and from what he last remembered the last time they did it was on his last day of his rut.

Shouto would always say he didn’t want to take his knot but when he didn't, he’d throw a fit about how he couldn’t finish without it. They were more affectionate physically than they ever were than with their words: a kiss on the forehead before bed, a reassuring hand on the hip and hug after a long shift.

He missed it, the intimacy and just coming home to someone and having the house have touches of the person he loved most, it was something he didn’t realise until he didn’t have it. And if this was the closest Shouto would let him in, he would take it even if he knew he wanted more, wanted back his normal. His feelings were always his priority and overstepping them was something he’d never intentionally do.

Katsuki’s thoughts wandered as he kept his hands busy, wiping down counters and washing the few dishes he left from the breakfast he packed. It made him want to cook, something he enjoyed as well as watching others eat what he made and also what Shouto needed. After everything was set back in its place he explored the kitchen cupboards, most was bare minus a few instant noodle packets.

He didn’t judge it just based on the cupboards, Shouto usually kept to liquids if he couldn’t keep his food down after a serious injury. The last thing he was expecting was the fridge to be bare, minus a jug of filtered water and a near empty box with energy gel packets. Then he looked to the counter and there were stacks of baby formula and it was telling that Shouto wasn’t prioritising himself.

It pissed him off, Shouto putting others before himself and even with Saruki being a baby and only being able to depend on him, he needed to help himself if he was to help her. Katsuki only being able to see it now was driving him into a wall, he was meant to be there for him even if they weren’t close or even on speaking terms. Even though they were young when they mated he’d devoted himself to him, even if they ended up on bad terms he wouldn’t turn a blind eye to his suffering.

They wore matching earrings to signify that, a small gold hoop on the right side, the earring chosen by him and the side chosen by Shouto. Katsuki simply chose it because he knew Shouto didn’t like a mating bite, symbolising that he belonged to someone, which he was fine with. As well as picking it to be gold, it had a higher melting point than silver meaning Shouto could wear it in the field as well as fluctuate his fire on both sides without fear of melting it.

Katsuki noticed Shouto still wore it but he knew it was only so he didn’t get an infection, the first time Shouto took it out it swelled and leaked pus making him have an earache for days. They got it when they'd turned 20, he knew that Shouto didn’t like big appearances and neither did he so he wanted to do something subtle. That was the only thing he could hold onto that he had another chance with Shouto.

And he held onto it tightly.

The silence was getting to him, the house was getting darker and he hadn’t seen either Saruki or Shouto for four hours. He wanted to check on him, the last time he’d seen Shouto he was completely out of it and panicking if he had harmed Saruki. Katsuki knew Shouto would never hurt her, not intentionally but he wanted to see their faces, so he made his way up the stairs and opened the door opposite.

Shouto was out cold, the hours of reassurance by Saruki's presence seemed to put him at ease enough to rest. The blankets were tucked tightly around him, bundled up all the way around his neck as he breathed softly. Saruki close next to him, wide awake and pulling at her mittens with her toothless gums.

It wasn’t in Katsuki's plan to stay there all day but he wasn't against it, even if being close to Shouto meant he’d have to sacrifice a few days off of work. He would, a quick message to Izuku to ask if he could cover his shift tomorrow so he could stick with Shouto, soon after he received a quick reply of a thumbs up.

After not being on his phone for almost a whole day, it gave him the chance to check the date and finally it occurred to him one of the reasons why Shouto might be so anxious. Tomorrow was the 11th of January, Shouto’s birthday and the birthday where he'd not only grow a year older, but also older than his eldest brother.

And here he was, alone with no one to guide him on his grief and a new born baby on top of it all. Katsuki had wanted to ease the weight on his shoulders, even if just for a day and a birthday was the best way to do it. Shouto hated being spoiled, especially without reason but with it being his birthday he wouldn’t be as reluctant to reject the gestures.

Having people around him helped, from what he remembered from UA the few classmates he had around him changed his perspective on his future. The only person he knew that came around consistently was Shinsou but not enough to have his pheromones linger. But he remembered the guy wore scent patches most of the time, so it could be more often that he visited.

Katsuki decided that for the first time in nearly a year he’d take initiative, so he sent a text to Shinsou that he’d stay with Shouto for his birthday. Seems he got the hint enough that he wanted alone time with Shouto with his text, ‘guess i’ll bring my gift over another day then’.

His time in England came to mind, the pub Kirishima and Mina owned always did a big breakfast in the morning and he overstayed enough to have it a handful of times. Shouto hadn’t been eating right and his house was lacking food and Katsuki loved to cook, even more so he loved to feed the people he loved.

Saruki hadn’t left the house in over a day, the cold air had settled enough that it was a light fog outside and he remembered the store he’d passed on the way over. Katsuki was quiet with it, picking her up and out of her crib and down the stairs, missing every creak on the way. He bundled up Saruki in a few layers, enough that she flushed red and he was about to leave when he realised he didn’t know how to wear a baby carrier. After a few tutorial videos of how to secure the baby carrier, he managed to secure her to his chest. He put on his coat and zipped it up around her, her body instantly stopping its little shakes, that gave him enough confidence for him to leave.

He took the spare key hung up, stuffed it into his coat pocket and opened the door, letting the wind run through his hair before throwing on his cap as well as hers. The journey was already mapped out in his head, his memory was the one thing he could rely on so it didn’t shock him that one moment he was at Shouto’s house and the next he was outside the store.

The store was quiet, he then realised it was close enough to closing hours that the night shift had already begun restocking a few of the bare shelves. All the stuff he wanted was easy enough to find, all the savoury products being in the same section he practically found everything in a few minutes. The only thing left to find was beans, he’d assumed it would be in the pickled section like any other bean submerged in liquid.

Saruki has been wide awake since the moment they entered the store, he’d assume it was because of the change of brightness. On the walk to the store, there were barely any street lights and he’d only get a glimpse of the pavement in front of him when a car passed by. Each person's headlights being abnormally dim didn’t do much either, luckily the store's sign was bright and glowing from the moment he turned the second corner.

She had been staring up at him the whole time, her hat hanging loosely over her forehead and onto her eyebrows. He adjusted it slightly so it sat just behind her hairline, she followed his every movement with her eyes. Saruki spoke enough words with just her expressions, she was admiring him with her big eyes and her gummy smile and he loved every bit of it.

This child was something he didn’t know he needed, she was perfect and she looked almost identical to the person he loved most. He could understand why Shouto sacrificed so much of himself for her, such innocence and pureness in a smile was something he hadn’t seen since he was kid. Still he couldn’t sit by and watch Shouto rot away as Saruki blossomed and not have him be able to see it.

Her face crumpled up after a while and shortly after she began to cry, he was confused as she was relaxed a few moments ago. But it came to him that she hadn’t been fed, not from what he had seen of her and Shouto together and that meant it could’ve been over twelve hours of no food. He cut the journey short and headed to the till, only stopping when a line of flowers caught his eye.

Katsuki paid for what he needed and hurried back home, holding the few bags in one hand whilst the other soothed Saruki's forehead. The house had been quiet when he arrived, just how he had left it meaning Shouto was still knocked out. He shook off the thick layers of clothes and slid off his shoes, placing the bags onto the floor.

Saruki had begun to settle as he undid the baby carrier around her, he himself could emphasise with her as it was tight around his chest. Katsuki moved to pull her out and place her against him, hanging up all the clothes and baby carrier on the coat hook. He moved to the kitchen, putting the bottle in the steriliser as he put the kettle on.

She cooed the more he rubbed his hand along her spine, rubbing her face into his chest as he moved to empty the bags onto the island. The bassinet in the front room was set up for feeding already, he stepped carefully to lay her on her side as she nibbled on her mittens. With something to keep her distracted, he moved quickly and started to make her bottle as well as putting on the water to boil for the soba he decided to make.

Making soba from scratch was something he could do with his eyes closed, it came so naturally to him that he didn’t need measurements or instructions. Whereas he had to watch closely when handling her bottle, measuring the ounces of water to the formula and then getting rid of the bubbles after a good shake. The time it would take for the fresh soba to boil would be the same time for him to feed and burp her.

Katsuki decided that since the bottle needed time to cool, he’d drop the soba into the boiling water and gave it a stir. Saruki began sniffling and he knew then that he was testing her patience, he grabbed the bottle and poured a few drops onto his arm. It was a perfect temperature, he crouched to pick her up and positioned her in the crease of his elbow.

Her eyes searched for something in him and he watched her change in expression as he put the nipple to her mouth. Saruki had gone from a tired and fussy baby to being relaxed within a few seconds. The warmth from the milk and being in his arms seemed to calm her, the noises of her suckling made him feel the same way as he sat at the edge of the green sofa.

Katsuki had watched her until she had finished the bottle, he then settled her on his shoulder with a cloth to rest on. The water of the soba had started to bubble over, so he walked over to the kitchen, patting Saruki’s back as he went. He turned off the fire and drained the water, pouring the soba into a bowl of ice as he got out chopsticks and bowls.

The table was already set from where he tidied it earlier in the day, he set down two bowls one soaked in chilli oil and the other plain with a side of soy sauce. Saruki burped a few times, bringing a proud smile to his face as she nuzzled into his neck. Katsuki moved to turn off the overhead light and put on the lamps but Shouto beat him to it. It seemed he had been standing there for a while, watching his movements and being quiet so as not to disturb them.

“I was about to call you,” Katsuki moved out of the way so he could see the layout.

“There’s no need for all of this,” Shouto spoke quietly and moved to open the fridge, “Where has all this stuff come from?”

“Me and cupcake here went,” Katsuki moved her so she could rest on her belly, her arms and legs clinging to his forearm.

“You took her out? In the public eye and through a nasty storm, to what?” He could see Shouto was starting to panic, he had to change the mood.

“A simple thanks would do, now sit and eat the soba I made you.”

There was hesitation but eventually Shouto gave in and sat, Katsuki following in his step to sit opposite him. Saruki’s little mitten hands clung onto his thumb, he took the initiative and started eating with his free hand. He slurped the spicy soba loudly, watching to see if Shouto would follow and eat his favourite meal without being asked to and he did.

Shouto was finally eating, and once he had eaten the whole bowl of soba Katsuki was content enough to stop observing him. Saruki was drooling over his hand as he held her, she was reaching for his bowl of soba and he couldn’t not laugh. His one hand held her securely, wrapping her body with her belly resting in his palm and her head resting between his thumb and forefinger.

“Not for you cupcake, gotta wait until you have some teeth.” He moved the bowl forward, out of her reach.

Katsuki slurped up his second bowl, with a generous amount of chilli sauce drizzled over it and with the distance from the bowl to his mouth it was bound to drip down. Saruki was the victim of it, sauce falling flat on her white hair, luckily she took no notice of it and started blowing spit bubbles. Shouto had noticed though, wearing a pout on his face but it wasn’t because she was a mess but because he’d have to stop eating his soba.

“Don’t worry, I got it and I've gotta learn to start cleaning up my messes around here.” Katsuki brushed off what sauce he could with his shirt, leaving behind an orange stain.

“There’s wipes in her room. Make sure not to get her head wet, I don’t want to have another doctor visit because of a cold.”

“Yeah, yeah now finish up that soba before i’m done with her.”

Katsuki watched as Shouto went to serve himself another portion, he moved to get up and start heading upstairs. Once he had heard Shouto slurping the noodles, only then did he begin his ascent. Saruki had already started dozing off, her face fully resting in his palm as drool coated his thumb.

Katsuki could feel the sleep catching up to him, walking up the stairs felt like hell but things got worse before they got better. He opened the door to Saruki's room, which was submerged in darkness but he knew there was a lamp that he had installed earlier. The cabinet which was to his left, he folded and filled it with outfits that matched and in the top drawer was bows and clips that were piled in a box.

On top was the lamp he briefly turned on and a few hair brushes but the center piece was a music box, it had small compartments that were empty. He’d seen one similar in Mina‘s makeup room, instead that one held jewellery and little spiders that she so and so called ‘clusters’. Saruki started fussing as soon as he tried putting her down, her cheeks going red immediately and her nose scrunched up in distress.

That’s when he had realised she had leaked through her clothes, his hand was soaked in a thick layer of piss. But he couldn’t even blame her, she’d slept most of the day on a full stomach and unless Shouto changed her in his room it meant she hadn’t been changed since before the sun came up. He moved her to the changing table before she could complain, tossing her outfit into the dirty basket.

It seemed it leaked all the way up to her back, he knew he should properly give her a bath but as they had come in the house barely two hours ago he was against it. Getting her sick wasn’t on his agenda, Shouto would be fucking pissed at him and he only just got on his good side. Katsuki was glad he was still so in love with Shouto that he watched his every movement since he was welcomed into his house.

Saruki started to fuss as soon as he undid her nappy, the cold air brushing on her damp skin seemed to startle her. Katsuki was quick with it, holding a bundle of wipes in his hand whilst the other smoothed down her hair. Slowly, he heated up his palm enough not to sweat but to warm up the wipes and clean her up. She let out a giggle after he started to fasten up the nappy, a snot bubble coming out as he fastened up her vest.

Her eyes still hadn’t fully opened yet, despite her being three months old but every time he got a good enough look he saw a light blue. It was similar to Shouto’s turquoise but lighter, closer to Fuyumi’s blue and it was beautiful that she looked so much like the Todoroki family. Shouto taking her in was perfect, if the media got a glimpse of her they wouldn’t question her origins and he knew Shouto hated people in his business.

At that moment Saruki shivered, the winter was harsh around January even with the heating on full blast and a heating quirk. Christmas had only just passed but the red and white onesie folded on top of the pile of clothes was all he could see. Katsuki smoothed down her hair, her wrinkled nose relaxing instantly giving him the few seconds to get the onesie.

It was lined with fur on the inside, with a soft feel to it and so he put her little legs through and then her arms as they waved around. Both her feet and hands were covered, meaning he didn’t have to go out of his way to find socks and that one pair of mittens she owned. Her hair still held some of the chilli oil he had dropped on her, he used some of the extra wipes he heated up to clean until her hair went back to white. That’s when he noticed the onesie even had a hood attached to it, with the features of a cat he slid it over so it covered most of her hair.

As soon as he clipped the onesie, she began to settle and he was about to pick her up to place her in her cot when he realised his shirt was still covered in chilli oil. His mind could hardly keep up with his movements at that point to even think of where he put his bag of clothes, so he simply took it off and placed it by the door.

The rocking chair he had built earlier was calling to him, he picked her up off the changing table and moved to put her in the cot. He started lowering her when she started to fuss, her eyes fully closed but her body wide awake as she started to wiggle. Katsuki decided against it right away, he couldn’t make her uncomfortable and they were both tired and in an unusual place.

His body ran warm anyways so if she could fall asleep quick enough, he could go home and get a good night's rest before work. When assembling the chair he remembered it having a lever to extend it so that it could lay flat, he moved so the lamp could shine on the chair. Its lever was just below the hand rest, he shifted her to lay on his chest as flicked the lever and laid down on the now bed.

(more to add here +)

This time he was the first to wake up, the sun hadn’t yet risen but the warmth he felt around him was comforting. He opened his eyes and blinked away the morning blur, before taking in the scene laid out in front of him. Shouto’s cheeks were still red but his eyes didn’t hold any puffiness from the night before so at the minimum he didn’t cry after he went to sleep.

Katsuki was pissed, even if he wasn’t in Shouto’s life he should have known that something was wrong. That he wasn’t coping, at least of knowing that he had taken a whole child on board with no constant support system if needed. Saruki was still young, not old enough to learn habits from anything around her just yet but she was still vulnerable to anything.

Shouto’s pheromones had gotten stronger in the months they’d been apart, and in the few days he’d spent with him they'd gone out of control twice. Two too many, it drove him up a wall that even if he couldn’t be there for him that even just one of their friends would have noticed that he was spiraling.

But knowing Shouto he was good at hiding his true feelings, his true intentions and Katsuki didn’t blame him. Couldn’t blame him, when it had been fucking beaten into him since he was a child from the bastard. But there was no excuse now, Endeavour had died nearly eight years ago so his past shouldn’t still have such a strong presence.

Then again having your brother and father die, within months of each other, wasn’t an easy thing to talk about. With their friends no matter how hard they’d try and be there it would still end in a pity party. The chance of someone being in a similar or even the same circumstance was slim to zero.

A seventeen year old, who’d been through two wars in less than a year and fought not a villain but his own brother. The supposed ‘dead’ brother he admired, barely knew him and yet his only goal was to save him in the end and yet that still failed. Katsuki still doesn’t know the ins and outs, but he knows that Shouto blames himself for it even though he did the best he could.

Even in his sleep it seemed he couldn’t relax, his eyebrows were knitted together mostly covered by his bangs. Just by the length of Shouto’s hair, Katsuki knew that the time apart from him was too long. It took months for Shouto’s hair to grow even 3 inches, so the fact it reached just below his shoulders was proof enough.

He smoothed the creases out of his forehead until he relaxed, bringing the blanket up and around his neck. Tucking it around him as he combed the stray hair out of his face, it was slightly tangled and didn’t hold the usual silk feel. Shouto was neglecting himself but he could understand one of the reasons, he wasn’t in the public eye for what seemed like months so he abandoned his appearance.

Katsuki wasn’t bothered by it, he was beautiful no matter his state but if it was affecting his health and state of mind he’s not hesitant to speak up about it. But all he needed now was rest, if he could give him that even for a few hours he would before he’d have to go back to work. Shouto’s birthday was never a big thing, but Katsuki wanted to give him some normality if he could and that usually started with a hearty breakfast.

He treaded lightly, so as not to startle Shouto out of his sleep moving towards the open door and out into the hallway. He’d forgotten he had left Saruki's door open but in that moment he was glad he did. Seeing the sun shining on her face as she stared into nothing was enough for him to move and scoop her into his arms.

She cooed at him, her small hands reaching for his face, he lowered it to rub nose to nose and his alpha purred. It knew this was right, even though this life wasn’t his to make his own he both needed and wanted to be part of it. Saruki brought something to Shouto’s life that he’d been missing for a year, love.
Call him a sap if you want but at the end of the day everyone wants to come home to someone who wants to spend the rest of their life with you.

But even he could tell that his time at Shouto’s house was coming to an end, he was beginning to distance himself and Katsuki promised himself he wouldn’t overstep. He still hadn’t made the breakfast he intended to make initially, he promised that would be his last thing before he left. Saruki could be his judge, not on the taste but his cheffing skills and how quickly he could do it before Shouto woke up.

He stepped down the stairs carefully, keeping her head steady in his hand as she turned to look up at him. For this breakfast he needed his hands free, Saruki hadn’t been on anything but her crib when by herself. But he knew at her age she should be learning the basics of rolling over and holding up her head, he also didn’t want Shouto to be too pissed with him.

Katsuki moved to the sofa, laying one of her blankets on the carpet, then surrounding her with a pile of pillows to keep her from rolling onto the cold floor. He moved to put her down, putting her chubby arms together to keep her head from resting on the blanket. It took a few minutes but he decided after she hadn’t even tried to look up that she needed something to motivate her, or in his case to distract her.

He realised that the tv behind him hadn’t been used, sitting there and collecting dust with the remote control. Katsuki brushed it off
and turned onto the first channel that didn’t display hero work, no matter how much he wanted to watch himself. Saruki started giggling after a few clicks of people’s voice cutting out, when he finally reached a kids channel she started cooing almost immediately.

(more to add here +)

The breakfast was filling, more than he remembered feeling in England meaning he had finally adjusted back to his normal diet. His appetite was peak when he ate japanese food even more so if it was home cooked, Shouto was the same with how he shovelled the beans into his mouth. Katsuki hurried to finish his own food, so that Shouto could eat comfortably and he could hold Saruki.

She read him well, as soon as he had put his fork down she started reaching for him and he didn’t hesitate pulling her from Shouto’s arms. He could see Shouto already looking for an excuse not to finish the breakfast, so he made sure to let him know not to let it go cold. It seemed that was enough, he huffed and went to his food and Katsuki went to sit on the sofa and continue the kids show he had put on earlier.

After a few minutes he citified hear the clanging of dishes, Shouto had put them in the sink and already started walking over to him. Shouto only had to put an arm out for him to hand over Saruki, he stood up and carefully handed her over, he had caught the way she sniffed for Shouto. Her whole body relaxed as she was laid on his chest, they moved in sync with the way he turned away and she curled into her shoulder.

In that moment he realised he was the outsider, Shouto and Saruki doing their own thing as he sat and watched. Waiting for something to be said to him, or even any attention directed at him was false hope so he decided his time was up. Katsuki walked over to Shouto, his mind still elsewhere, then pressed a long kiss to Saruki’s forehead and turned without saying a word.

Shouto’s silence spoke words, he moved to pack his bag that he’d left in the hallway the night before. Shoving everything into it messily to get out as soon as he could, sliding his feet into his shoes and opening the door.

It was the last thing he wanted to do but he could tell that Shouto was starting to get annoyed with his presence and if he had a slight chance of being invited over again then he’d leave. His coat and hat had dried from the night before, Shouto’s house always holding a warmth to it that you never wanted to leave. Katsuki took one last look at Shouto and Saruki, both of their eyes on the the purple flowers he had gotten and that was enough for him to leave the without a word.

~ ⋆ ̊ ⋆୨♡୧⋆ ̊ ⋆ ~

It took a while but Shouto had managed to collect himself, the blurriness from his tears started to become clearer and he could see everything in front of him. Saruki was fast asleep, her mitten hands bundled up next to her red cheeks and he could feel her warm breath on his chest.

Katsuki's hands cradled her close to his chest, his whole hand completely covering the back of her head. The other hand was supporting him more than it was her, it kept his trembling hands holding Saruki up and close. The warmth encompassed him, he hasn’t been held so softly in nearly a year, since he ended things with Katsuki.

The day Saruki was conceived.

Shouto was conflicted, it was the first time he realised his own vulnerability with not having Saruki in his line of sight. Katsuki saw it all first hand, there wasn’t a way to even explain the way he acted. It was out of character for him, he had never been so out of control of his emotions enough that he hallucinated scenarios that never happened.

The security of having Katsuki holding him up was needed, he still felt unsure of how he could hold himself up let alone get up and not drop Saruki. But her shivering alerted him enough to move and he was glad Katsuki didn’t try to stop him, he knew he’d be vulnerable with him. He couldn’t be in front of him because it was one thing to be a liar, but lying to someone’s face was something he had been growing out of.

Telling Katsuki he was okay would be the most obvious lie, so avoiding him overall was his only way. The room to his bedroom was open and for the first time, he closed it behind him and laid down. He sat up against the bunch of pillows and rested his eyes, Saruki staring at him with so much emotion that he pressed a long kiss to her forehead.

Resting his eyes was something he always did if he was tired but not enough to sleep and it seemed Saruki was on the same page as him. She was staring into nothing and suckled on her mittened fist Shouto slouched further down and shut his eyes, her breathing calming him. With enough time he was out like a light, Saruki following in suit as she snored heavily into neck.

~

The constant shuffling of Saruki had him up every hour, his body couldn’t produce enough milk to keep her full but then again he was too tired to make a bottle. Plus he didn’t know if Katsuki was still in the house but it was good he wasn’t certain, he didn’t want to start relying on him. After waking up for the third time he ended up falling asleep with Saruki suckling at his chest, only waking up once she had stopped.

Shouto managed to have enough energy to put her in the bed side cot, the last thing he wanted to do was roll over in his sleep and crush her. He passed out shortly after she stopped wiggling, sleeping until the sun had all but gone from the sky and a heavy fog to replace it. The smell of a meal he hadn’t eaten let alone craved, filled his room and his instincts were saying to follow it and that had him stepping down the stairs.

He walked into the front room and admired the scene in front of him, Saruki’s eyes widened as she got a look on him. Her head started to lift up off of Katsuki’s shoulder as he walked up and down the kitchen. The lighting in the room was bright, blinding almost that he decided to turn off the big light and turn on the lamps on the wall.

Katsuki turned around just as he flicked the switch, Shouto’s inner monologue just kept calling him ‘hot’ with him in his vest top clinging to his chest. Saruki held the same look in her eyes as him in that moment, without even trying she was breaking his heart. He was shown to the the empty seat, with a bowl of soba sat waiting for him and a side of soy sauce.

The moment was mostly a blur, a bit of bickering between him and Katsuki but really he was greatful for the company, for a person to feel like home. He only came to when Saruki’s white hair had gone to a red, Katsuki had spilt his chilli sauce all on her head. Of course she was unbothered, blowing spit bubbles into her hand as he was holding himself back from cursing.

Katsuki for once took the initiative, bringing Saruki upstairs to put her to bed and clean her. Shouto didn’t know if he was doing it for him but he was greatful none the less, his stomach hadn’t craved food in months and for once it hadn’t come back up after a few bites. He moved to dish himself up another portion, stuffing his face as if it was his last meal still keeping his slurping to a minimum so not to disturb Saruki.

Shouto had finished his cold soba nearly two hours ago and Katsuki still hadn't returned from when he said he'd put Saruki to sleep. She had always been easy to settle, falling asleep after only a few rubs from her forehead to the tip of her noise her eyelids would flutter shut. Throughout the whole night since she was born she'd only awake once, to be fed and coddled and then fall back asleep shortly after.

Katsuki had said that he was putting down Saruki in her cot, it would be the first night that she wouldn’t be sleeping beside him. The cot was one of the first things he bought, expensive but worth it as it could be adjusted to size as the baby grew. It had been quiet for quite a while, Shouto couldn’t hear any movement or small cries of protest.

Shouto remembered the room himself, only going in there during his panic attack in searching for Saruki. He'd known that Katsuki had been at his house all day looking after Saruki as he rested, his sleep going undisturbed for hours. He knew he didn’t even need to ask, he just did, which was something he always loved about him, especially it being one of his motivators to becoming a hero. Since Katsuki was a child, he had hated having to depend on people, even more so to go out of his way to ask for help.

The house was tidy, almost spotless since Katsuki had arrived the previous day. It wasn’t like he’d leave the house a mess but there’d be a few blankets bundled up instead of folded or a few dishes in the sink that were scrubbed and only needed rinsing. It was a recent habit he had picked up, doing half jobs so he could attend to Saruki and check if she was okay.

It seemed since Katsuki arrived, everything was slightly more peaceful as he had gotten his first full night of rest since she was born. Their scent had mixed in the house and it gave him reassurance that he was here, his body had noticed if before he had. Shouto hadn’t realised he needed reassurance that someone was there for him when he needed it but didn’t ask for it.

Shouto’s stomach was full and as he stood he could feel the weight in his stomach drop, something he hadn’t been used to in a while. It felt as if he was carrying Saruki again, she was such a small baby that his stomach had barely been noticeable. He only started to show near the end of the pregnancy, the few stares he got from Hanta when he’d bend down and his shirt would ride up, was a lot.

The majority of the time he spent his pregnancy alone, something he wanted and had asked of both his friends and family, which he needed. Bringing a child into a world as cruel as theirs was evil, it was almost selfish but if he could give someone a great life why wouldn’t he. He knew it’d be hard, knowing that the child wouldn’t have two parents in the picture before she even arrived was sad.

But then again he would say his own life would have been better if he had just one parent, when his mind would get the better of him he sometimes would think it’d be better without both. Then he would regret it immediately, the little time he had with his mother was all that pushed him forwards to know not everyone was evil.

Many would see Katsuki as abrasive and evil, the world painted him as a villain which is the furthest thing he was from. In the spotlight his defences were always put up but at home with him he was his true self. Still loud and outspoken but that was always how he was and he loved him for it as his feelings would always be put out there.

Shouto had seen his vulnerability, how much he depended on a hug after a long day at work or when he needed to be the small spoon even if he hated it. They balanced each other out, something he’d never had in his life before him. Always having to be at the worst ends of things when worst came to worst, Saruki wouldn’t ever have to experience that.

The silence had become unsettling, since Katsuki had cooked he collected all the dishes and moved to wash them. Wiping the counters as he went by and dishing up the soba in a container, then placing it in the fridge. That’s when he’d realised Katsuki had gone shopping, his fridge was the most full it had been in months and it was filled with all his favourite things.

Shouto didn’t know how to respond, only noticing when the fridge started to beep for being open too long. It was a moment he didn’t realise he missed, Katsuki going out of his way to help when he wasn’t asked. He appreciated it a lot in their relationship, even more now that Saruki was here, that reminded him he wanted to check on how Katsuki was doing.

He walked upstairs to the door to Saruki’s room being slightly open, with a dim light shining through the gap into the hallway. Shouto could hear snoring, almost in sync with each other he pushed it in slightly to avoid the creaky hinge on the door. It felt like he was dreaming, the scene in front of him was something he’d dreamt of many times he couldn’t fathom that he was witnessing it in real life.

Katsuki was doing something he’d always wanted, being a father and with no restraint and not some ‘beta’ holding him back. Shouto didn’t want him to find out he was an omega and definitely not a recessive omega, he wanted Katsuki to love him as him. He didn’t want him to want him back either not because Shouto wanted him but because he ‘finally’ got the one thing he wanted, an omega.

It was something that was constantly running on his mind, that if Katsuki found out Saruki was actually his and not some baby he took in he’d hate him. Shouto couldn’t live with himself if that happened, Katsuki hated liars more than anything and lying about a baby was something he couldn’t be forgiven for.

The anger he might have could be aimed at Saruki instead, he could take her away if he could, they both were equally her parents. That scared him because he knew if Katsuki did go through with it, he’d win by a mile with a lot of support, especially with his background.

Katsuki had a great upbringing, two loving parents who made time for their child and was both financially and emotionally available. Then Katsuki himself knew how to juggle his work life and home life without feeling pressured so much that he’d hurt others around him.

Katsuki would never hurt his own child.

Shouto couldn’t say the same.

It had been an accident, he wasn’t in the right mindset and was sleep deprived not even from adjusting to the baby but the reality of being a parent. The week had overall been stressful, people were constantly coming over to meet Saruki and his front room was piling with gifts. So a lot was overwhelming, the house was a mess and he’d gone from a quiet empty house to a loud overpopulated one.

Saruki was a good baby, she slept the majority of the time people came over which meant he didn’t have to constantly direct people how to hold her. With her being so small, they had to hold her differently and she needed support a lot with her neck otherwise it would cramp up. It was a lot to keep her settled whilst keeping guests entertained and keeping himself fed, there was a lot of change that came with her.

That particular night he hadn’t had the energy to even go upstairs to his bedroom and opted to sleep on the sofa with her in the stand up bassinet next to him. When she had woken in the middle of the night, she screamed at the top of her lungs until he picked her up. Her bottle was already made up in a warmer on the kitchen counter, walking there he nearly tripped with all the gift bags scattered across the floor.

The movement jolted her in his arms making her go back to crying, he felt like all his light had been drained out of him. Shouto took the bottle and tested it on his left arm and in his mind it was simply ‘not cold’, not warm or hot, just not cold. Saruki's face had turned red from all of her screaming, Shouto had practically drowned out the noise but her arms reaching for him pulled him out of his head.

He put the bottle to her mouth and one moment she was suckling then the next she was screeching, her mouth wide and red and her gums spotted with milk. Shouto dropped the bottle to the ground and moved her to his shoulder, rubbing her back to calm her down. It only worsened over time, the crying had died down but she had started coughing aggressively over his shoulder.

Shouto pulled her back and held her up in front of him, there were specks of milk and droplets of blood on her lips. That moment caused him to panic, he stood quickly and moved to stand in the light and saw her gums all red. The back of her throat was narrow, it looked like it was closing in on itself with the swelling.

Momo lived a few streets down, he ran out in his pyjamas with her bundled up in a thick blanket and his feet in his slippers. The melted snow turned into slush, with his feet sinking every step he took which only made him more frantic. Using his quirk wasn’t even an option, it had been unstable since having Saruki; initially he believed it was because he hadn’t used it in months but he knew it was something biologically.

Her house was unnoticeable unless you’d been inside, it blended in with the neighbourhood but the inside was designed as a mansion. A few hard knocks to the door had the security camera turning on, with an automated vouch recording but as soon as it recognised its face the door went swinging open. Momo quickly let him in when she saw what was bundled in his arms, the baby that was usually all smiles and giggles was crying and screeching.

Shouto went in quickly and kicked off his drenched slippers, and sat down on the couch as the lights flickered on. Momo sat down next to him, unwrapping the blanket from around Saruki and until this day he will always remember her face. The pure disappointment she wore wasn’t something he’d imagined to be directed at him, especially not from her.

“Shouto what happened?” She whispered in hushed breaths, running Saruki’s cheeks to calm her.

“I h-hurt her, I can't help her, please help.” He handed her the baby, his hands shaking as he brought them back to his chest.

“She's white in the face, I can't tell what’s wrong. Shouto, tell me what happened to her.”

“I’ve burned her.” Shouto could barely get the words out, but once he did he knew he’d never forgive himself.

The day after a long night with Momo he agreed to see his doctor with her diagnosis, she even offered to take care of Saruki for the day. It was something he’d been avoiding since having her, the time was there but he didn’t want her alone without him. He knew what it was like without having his mother around, he felt abandoned even though she didn’t willingly leave him.

His doctor opted in doing a home visit, to see if he could identify anything in the house that could be contributing to his symptoms. Shouto wore the same outfit he had left with, his pyjamas were damp with splashes of mud at the ankles and his slippers drenched, hung in a plastic bag.

When he got home he changed briefly to something comfortable, a loose shirt and joggers and a pair of socks as he couldn’t control his quirk and would get flushes of heat and cold. The doctor had arrived quickly, they spoke a lot since his last visit the previous month to do her vaccine shots and Saruki had a bad reaction to it. He spoke openly, Momo's reassuring voice echoed in the back of his mind as he spoke about his feelings.

The stress of watching Saruki all night, her every movement, her every breath even though she slept peacefully through the night with no knowledge of her surroundings.

As a child should be.

Shouto was hesitant at first, for anyone to hold Saruki, sometimes even acknowledging her presence set him off. It made him uncomfortable that the one beacon in his life could easily be taken and be someone else’s purpose. There was laughter in her smile, fondness in her touch and reassurance in her presence.

The image he saw of how Saruki put an impact on others, made him want to keep her to himself so no one could take advantage of her, like he once was. Shouto kept her held up in the house, mostly in his arms even when she was in deep slumber. At times he felt he was more reliant on her than she was on him, when she hit milestones he was happy but realised the more she hit the more she wouldn’t need him.

Breastfeeding was one of the only times he was sure she depended on him, her big eyes looking up to him as she grabbed onto his chest. She looked at him as if he was all she needed and clung to him like he was her lifeline, it was something he couldn’t imagine he’d be to someone. It was the one time they both depended on each other, the one thing he didn’t want to ever lose.

The doctor's face was pulled into a tight frown, he shook his head and wrote a few notes in his book and Shouto already knew the answer. He was advised to surround himself with people so his focus wasn’t pinpointed on her and some assistance would ease the load on him.

When he asked Shinsou and Hanta for more help they were both on it as soon as he mentioned it, making a schedule between them both so he was never alone. Saruki got a bonus out of it, having two uncles who cared for her safety just as much as they liked having fun. In his sleep, her giggles echoed throughout the house and occasionally he overhead the deep laughter of men.

It was a few weeks until he got an update back from his doctor, Momo's intuition was correct and he didn’t doubt her once. She was always the one who said it straight forward, the rare time she would spare his feelings, other times she’d make sure he’d know what’s on her mind but it was still hard to hear.

Shouto had postpartum depression.

It was something he had come to terms with in the previous three months, it gave him enough confidence to ask for help even if it was from his ex. Katsuki was someone he needed and wanted in his life, even though he had the one thought running through his mind that if he found out he’d hate him. But he took the risk, mostly because of the conversation he had with Hanta about inviting him back to his life.

~

Shouto had awoken to an empty bed, still slightly warm on the side that was abandoned. It was dark out, the sky was dense with a heavy fog that blocked out the light from the sun making the room cold. It couldn’t be any later than 10am, the sun usually reached its peak at midday but with it being winter the peak was merely the brightness of a desk lamp.

Katsuki's top was loose on him, falling off of his shoulders on one side whilst the shorts were slightly tight on his thighs whenever he flexed them. The door to his room was open and he heard the movement of clattering pans and multiple voices. Had Katsuki invited people over? He quickly headed down the stairs, that time watching his footing so as not to fall over and give himself another injury.

When he reached downstairs he'd seen a pile of pillows, he stepped in the front room and saw a head of white and blonde hair. His presence was prominent enough that eyes turned to look up at him, once they focused on him he was given a smile. The show on the tv being completely forgotten by Saruki, he then realised that that was the voices he had heard before.

It seemed Katsuki had put a barrier of pillows up around her, she rested on her stomach with her head wobbling as she held it up.
Shouto crouched down to scoop her up and hold her to his chest, the door connected to the kitchen was wide open and Katsuki was out of view.

He moved quietly with Saruki tight to his chest, he watched Katsuki’s movement and how they moved fluently with every pan in hand. Each fire on the stove was in use, he could smell egg and pork and in that moment the toaster popped up four pieces of toast. Katsuki moved quickly, catching them all before they fell back down and plated them onto two plates.

Shouto’s stomach rumbled loudly, enough to alert Katsuki of his presence and turn to stare at them both with a look of fondness on his face. The island centred in the middle of the kitchen was set up with his two bars stools pulled up on opposite sides with Saruki's high chair next to it. To him it seemed almost as if it was a date, well a family date to him and it seemed Katsuki could read his expression easily.

“It’s not a date if that’s what you’re thinking,” he wore a smirk on his face, Katsuki knew what he was doing.

“I wasn’t thinking.”

“Didn’t assume you had a thought running through that head of yours.”

“Don’t start.” Shouto didn’t want to start bickering that early in the morning.

“Sorry,” Katsuki turned around and finished plating up what was on the stove.

Shouto had to change the subject somehow, he was getting used to the familiarity of having someone cook breakfast for him. That’s when he noticed the vase in the windowsill, for one it wasn’t empty but filled with flowers, his mother’s favourite.

“What’s with the flowers?”

“I got them because it seemed empty in here without it, compared to our old house where I'd get you fresh ones every week.”

“Well that’s when we were dating Katsuki, we aren’t anymore.”

“Yeah. I know.”

It was silent after that, Katsuki filled up two glasses and placed them in front of the empty seats with a fork and a knife alongside the plates. Shouto was about to question why not chopsticks then realised it wasn’t a normal breakfast, it had eggs but lacked everything else. He was about to ask how to eat it but Katsuki was already stuffing his face, with a solemn look on his face.

The silent treatment didn’t go unwanted so he did the same, he probably should have said Saruki wasn’t old enough to sit in it so he held her in one arm and sat down. Katsuki looked up at him and he immediately looked down, he didn’t know how to eat it so he just jabbed anything he could with a fork and hoped it made it to his mouth.

He was about halfway through his food when Katsuki stood up and held his arms out, Saruki moved to reach for him. Shouto handed her to him and was about to question why when Katsuki answered it for him.

“Eat before it gets cold, cause I don't want a dumb excuse of why you can’t finish it.”

Katsuki held onto Saruki and moved to sit on the sofa, both of them watching the kids show that was on. Shouto ate quickly as he knew it was soon for Saruki to be fed, it took him longer than he wanted to get to the last bite. It was a hearty breakfast, his stomach had been so full it looked almost like he was pregnant again. But he was glad that was one thing he could be sure he wasn’t, he hadn’t had sex since around this time last year.

It being both the reason they broke up and how Saruki was made, a time he wanted to both remember and forget. That moment ran through his mind every day since, even more so since he found out he was carrying Saruki. He was confused of what he wanted, Saruki should be able to have both parents and it was unfair to take that from her because of one insecurity he had.

~

Shouto started to zone out more often as the sky became dimmer, Saruki had been fed well with both a bottle and breastmilk. He’d hidden himself multiple times in his room to hide it from Katsuki, it was never intentional but how could he explain the past year in one conversation.

The main factor being that Saruki was his child, which with no doubt Katsuki would be ecstatic about but then it was how she was made. Shouto had hidden a whole pregnancy from him, even though the time that his stomach began showing he was away on a mission. Then the hardest news that would shock them both, was that he was an omega and a recessive one at that.

Would Katsuki accept that?

Would he assume he’d been lying to him this whole time?

Would Katsuki want him more because he was an omega?

Questions ran through his head constantly when he was around, his presence both being reassuring as well as stressful. But it seemed his constant absence was enough for Katsuki to feel unwanted as he was packing up his overnight bag. Bending down over him to place a kiss to Saruki’s forehead, making her smile but that all ended the moment he walked away to put his shoes on.

Shouto let him go.

Chapter Text

Since Katsuki left Shouto’s house, questions had been running through his head about where his support was. The house was constantly empty, minus Shouto and the baby and he still couldn’t pick up any scents on any furniture. Even a hint of a temporary presence couldn't be found even with his sense of smell, which meant no one came here or Shouto was good at masking others' scent.

He’d been there for two days straight, one of them being Shouto’s birthday and not one person showed up. Everyone knew Shouto wasn’t really a birthday person but that birthday was the one where he’d be older than his eldest brother. Not once had there been a knock at the door, let alone a phone call of happy birthday.

Then again he hadn’t seen Shouto bring out his phone once, not even to check the time or take pictures of Saruki trying to roll over. But he knew more than likely Shouto told others that he wanted to keep to himself, if he didn't say it to him he'd take that as he wanted him around. Even if he only wanted him to stay to look after Saruki, he would take it, any opportunity he was given to stay by his side he would.

The time he spent with him was not long enough, in the two days he practically stayed glued to his side and when he wasn't he was by Saruki's side. More often than not she was more awake than Shouto, her eyes wandering around the room every time he picked her up. Sometimes he forgets that this is her first time seeing the world, everything around her was new to her even the raindrops that streamed down the windows.

Shouto had a pile of books on the table, one opened to the page labelled ‘tummy time’, he only came across it by accident after cleaning the dishes to find it in the living room. It was the first time he had woken up since his panic attack, he cried until there were no tears left and he drained his energy and nearly fell asleep in his arms. Saruki stayed deep in sleep the whole time he held them both, Shouto's head falling forwards until it rested in his other hand.

Katsuki had never seen him break down like that, even after his brother's death his eyes were dry but he assumed it was more due to shock and realisation that death was the one thing that was permanent. The scar around Shouto's eye was moist when rested in his palm, it had never wrinkled so much that he could feel the lines around his eyes.

He didn't remember how long he stayed there but it was enough that his thighs had become numb, giving mixed signals was something Shouto was good at. But he was just as good at reading them, he could tell that he had overstepped his boundaries and maybe even his temporary stay. He gave Shouto his space, there were a few toys he still had to unpack and shelves to wipe dust away from drilling in holes.

That day had passed quickly and he didn't want to stay any longer than he was wanted, it seemed only when he was around Shouto’s emotions became unstable. And he knew with someone so young relying on him, he took the step himself to make sure they were both not stressed for no reason at all. The breakfast he did was the last thing he could offer him, if not a peace of mind he could always make a fulfilling meal.

Katsuki left after Shouto had made it clear that he wanted to be alone, he didn’t want to overstep already and be shut out for another year or more depending on how he felt. Shouto had been practically ignoring him since he'd woken up, walking out of the room into another as soon as he entered.

One thing he didn’t want to do was make Shouto feel uncomfortable in his own house, not when he had been uncomfortable in his childhood home. This house was catered to Shouto’s likes, which he was proud of as he never expressed his personality in their old home. It was a comfortable house, not too flashy even though he had money to do so, which spoke Shouto, the guy who didn’t care for appearances.

Saruki had been the one thing to sever the silence in the house, constantly giggling and blowing bubbles in her spit covered hands. Shouto never once scolded her, just wiping away her hands and covering them in her mittens and directing her to do something else. Katsuki admired him for that and observed from a distance at the interactions they had, this was their normal and he had the privilege of witnessing it.

Since he had left the house he felt like something was missing, when he returned back to his empty house with all to display was his medals and achievements. It was something he dreamed of, envisioned of in his future since he was a child but he realised this wasn't the way he wanted to live.

In the hero world it was almost frowned upon to have a family as it was near enough impossible to manage a hero status and have a happy and secured home. The reality of having both was hard to imagine but he'd seen it from the ins and outs and now knew it was possible, Shouto had already been doing it. He'd been doing it for months, alone and Katsuki would do anything to ease the load and even be a part of it if he was accepted.

It was only a few days that had passed since he'd left, he'd never felt so out of place in his home and it wasn't something he wanted to get used to. After one of his shifts he decided to go back just to check in, it was early enough that he wouldn't disturb their sleep and he was glad that the lights were on. He walked up the few stairs that led to the door and knocked, he heard movement and even a quiet cooing from Saruki.

But still there was no movement towards the door but away from it, the sound of footsteps becoming muffled the longer he stood. Katsuki tried once more in case Shouto thought he was a mailman or something and again he was met with silence. He didn’t want to startle them so he left, he too would prefer warning if someone was showing up to his house.

It became a routine of his, the two consecutive days he’d have off a week was the only opportunity he had to search for Shouto and Saruki. Shouto’s voice was prominent one of the times, shouting almost but it was directed at someone he was obviously close with the word ‘friend’ getting thrown around every minute. That time he had decided to use his voice, talking loud enough that Shouto would hear him but that seemed to only silence him.

Katsuki then decided he’d take another route if Shouto was gonna ignore him, Izuku was one of the closest to him and he saw him often enough he could ask him the following day. There was a meeting every other week on a Thursday morning, created by Uravity to check in with pro heroes mental stability and if their quirk was kept in check. Not to say it wasn't needed but nine times out of ten, everyone was functioning how they should but he knew most heroes would be there meaning he'd run into exactly who he needed.

Sero Hanta.

He knew that guy was sneaky, always everywhere but nowhere to be seen and even more so he pretty much kept tabs on everyone around him. Katsuki for once was early, he basically stood guard at the door until someone with chunky elbows came bellowing past with laughter. Where he was standing he was almost hidden behind the door, so once Hanta was within reach he yanked him from the forearm and down an empty hallway.

“Yo, man what's up?” He could tell that he wasn't expecting him out of all people.

“I ain't got time for small talk, where's Shouto?” Katsuki wanted to make the conversation quick, he just needed answers.

“Shouto? Why are you asking me about him?” Sero had shook off his hold and taken a step back, "Haven't you been separated for almost a year, not to be that guy but you need to move on.” He was deviating, trying to take the focus off of him and back to Katsuki but he could tell he was putting on a front with all the sweat that was dripping down his hair.

“Dont act dumb, I know that you know about Saruki.”

Now that seemed to set him off, his eyes widened a fraction, something he wouldn't have taken notice of if he wasn't watching him so intensely. He thought he’d at least say something but it seemed like Saruki threw him off guard and that's when he knew he had him.

“Oi, stop freezing up on me. Just at least tell me why he doesnt wanna see me?”

“Imma be honest with you, the last week or two my girls had me hung up and on a strict schedule?” Hanta stopped making eye contact with him.

“You have a girl?” He raised his eyebrow, never had he even shown interest in someone let alone to stay committed.

“Yeah, recent thing though. You know that alpha girl from the year above, pink hair?”

“Mhm,” wasting time, again.

“She might not look like it but man but she's got me on ropes, wants me home as soon as my shift is over.”

“Yeah, yeah. So you saying you can't help me out with Shou?”

“Nah, I wish. But why haven't you tried his brother, they've been close since the first war no?”

“Gimme his number, I'm a much busier man than I look.” Hanta didn't hesitate, giving his contact number and turning the corner back to the meeting.

~ ⋆ ̊ ⋆୨♡୧⋆ ̊ ⋆ ~

Shinsou wasn’t hesitant to meet up but he didn’t want to say too much because it would put him in trouble with Shouto. It wasn’t like the secret Shouto was hiding could be thrown under a rug, it was a whole baby. Just from the few interactions, he could tell Bakugo had become attached to Saruki without even knowing he’s the father.

Vice versa, Saruki is constantly babbling whenever Bakugo shows up on tv with his flashy quirk. The girl hardly pays attention to tv unless he’s on, eyes glued on with her mouth nibbling on her mittens. It’s not as if she doesn’t look like both her parents, but she has Shouto’s expressions which are limited with either a small smile or a frown.

Saruki barely meets people, not to fault his brother as he doesn’t understand him and probably never will. The season was cold when she was born, with it being early October there was light frosting on every surface outside. Shinsou had arrived late, not receiving the missed calls from Shouto until his shift was over early hours in the morning.

He rushed over quickly, arriving just after Saruki had been born and being able to hear her first cry was something he was grateful for. Luckily Sero had stayed the previous day with Shouto, it had been a long day for both of them with Shouto being in labour for the majority of it.

From what he knew Shouto avoided medicine unless it was completely necessary, so induced labour was something he wanted to avoid entirely. The pregnancy had been hard on him, his body had been under a lot of pressure and not because of the size of the baby no, but the loss it came with.

The lack of pheromones from the alpha he’s been with since he was seventeen was taking a toll on him. They had mated the year after graduation, no one knew until years later as Shouto preferred wearing scent patches. It was something he had to do, with each gender attempting to court Shouto even though at the time he was known to be a beta. There had been many occasions where he had been scented without his knowledge, only knowing when people questioned why he smelt like a particular person in his class.

Shouto’s glands hadn’t developed properly until after he had given birth to Saruki, beforehand he’d only be able to sense pheromones if they were in either rut or heat. Saruki had a sweet scent, similar to a sugary syrup which came on pretty strong if you were around her a lot. It was similar to Shouto’s, his being like a mint tea with a mix of fresh snow whilst hers was like a sweet caramel tea with blended ice.

After the birth, Shouto had been pretty out of it just by holding Saruki for a few moments and breaking out in tears after getting a glimpse of her. Fuyumi had been present for the birth and shortly after, giving the baby her first wash and combing bits of amniotic fluids out of her hair. She had clothed her in an outfit Shouto had previously picked out for her, then wrapped her in a strawberry pink blanket.

Soon after the doctor had done his checks on both the baby and Shouto, he left behind a birth certificate and words of congratulations. From what Sero had told him, Shouto had been in a lot of pain even though he didn’t make it obvious, mostly going silent for a few moments as he rested his head on the edge of the tub.

Sero had to empty the tub, full of all types of fluid but mainly blood that left a residue of pink at the bottom. He had to wash him down, doing everything in his power to avoid hurting him. It was an uncomfortable situation, he’d seen Shouto naked enough times in the locker room in UA. But he knew his private areas were tender, he avoided physically touching them and just lightly sprayed the shower on him until the water ran clear.

It took a lot of strength to hold him up, Shouto was knocked out shortly after and Hanta had started washing him and moving him was a struggle. With the dead weight and the added moisture, he was shocked he hadn’t slipped out of his arms as he carried him down the stairs. He clothed him and wrapped him in a blanket across his waist, propping pillows on each side of him.

The nesting room was previously planned out to be a gym for after he had Saruki to get back into shape. It was the room on the top floor, only having access by using pull down the loft ladder. Inside there was a hot tub and a nesting area, pillows and Katsuki old clothes piled up in a corner and opposite was the tub deep and wide that it could fit four grown men.

Shouto had used the tub when he’d given birth to Saruki, previously only using it for relaxing his muscles when he cramped up. The nesting area was a place where he rested most towards the end of the pregnancy, for when Saruki was giving strong enough kicks that he couldn’t get comfortable.

Shouto couldn’t stand on his own for the next couple of days, being put on bed rest until he could go to the toilet on his own. It was a long overall week, Shinsou visited daily as he couldn’t get time off of work so he ended up crashing on the sofa as soon as he got off.

The first month, he was basically working full time as at night he was a hero and in the day he was a babysitter. It was something he never complained about, he was able to spend time with his brother and his niece. Shouto barely left his room, he was either in a deep sleep or half awake with Saruki bundled up in his arms.

Shinsou kept things in order, having bottles cleaned and prepped for every six hours when needed. He didn’t ask many questions but he knew Shouto breastfed more often than she’d have formula. As his brother, he didn’t need to see everything as some things even crossed his boundaries and as a prime example was seeing his brother breastfeed.

Saruki was well fed, gaining weight quickly and her chubby hands reached to grab everything in her reach which was usually Shinsou's hair. Hitting her milestones was a big thing, she was a bit behind on other babies so when she opened her eyes fully for the first time he smiled back at her.

Her hair was becoming more fluffy by the day, with small curls at the end. The blonde and white blended well almost like albino hair, the edges being white and her crown being a light blonde similar to platinum blonde. Its texture was very different compared to Shoutos, he didn't know about Bakugo’s and again didn't care to know so he asked to confirm. The moment he asked he almost regretted it, Shouto had said it was just like his older brother's hair who had passed 6 years prior.

Touya died a few days after the war, Shouto being the one to comfort him in his last moments by brushing his hair out of his face. From what he remembered, Shouto had been the one to dress him for the funeral as no one else in his family could do it without breaking down. The funeral was private, as they wanted to avoid harassment from society, even though his death was kept a secret until recently. Paparazzi snapped pictures of them leaving the mausoleum, where they later had to move his remains due to vandalism and have them on private land.

Shouto broke down most times when brushing her hair, remembering Touya's red hair as it faded to white and now Saruki's from blonde to white. In the previous week she had managed to roll onto her side, it was a high achievement but in the moment of realisation it was horrifying. The morning Shouto had woken up he looked over to the bassinet to find it empty, he almost had jumped out the bed when he looked down and saw Saruki snuggled up to his chest with a little hand fisted in his shirt the other in her mouth as she suckled.

Weirdly enough he ended up seeing Sero more often than not, he always came over after every shift whereas Shinsou would leave about three hours after he arrived. They both tended to Saruki as Shouto slept, she enjoyed the attention, always giggling as she swung from person to person. Depending on the day, Sero would use his tape if his shift hadn't drained it out of him hanging her from the ceiling until she unravelled like a yoyo giggling with all gums on show.

Sero would put together a quick meal once Saruki was down, the meals were easy to digest as not to put too much strain on his body. The meals were filling but also beneficial to what Shouto lacked daily, simple meals like miso soup or a salmon stir fry were the usuals. Usually, Shouto would stay in his room only coming down a handful of times to welcome them but they didn’t care for pleasantries.

Shouto’s body had started declining soon after having Saruki, his body had strained itself carrying her and with how he cared for himself it didn’t help. No matter how much he ate it was hard to keep the fat on as the milk he produced would take most of it. More often than not Shouto simply didn’t have the energy to eat let alone be able hold the food down without throwing up soon after.

He’d assumed it was a learnt habit, hiding his sickness and avoiding telling people around him that something was wrong. At one point he had caught a virus and had constantly been throwing up, in secret. To avoid spreading it and without telling anyone, he tried to keep his distance but being in a relationship with someone who is very hands on wasn’t easy.

Shinsou didn't ask for the details, and didn't want to either as knowing his brother's sex life wasn’t something he’d ever be interested in. But when Bakugo came and asked him directly if there a reason Shouto wouldn’t let them fuck, he had to ask Shouto what was up with him. At times he’d have to use his quirk to get stuff out of him, that was one of those times and he cursed him out until he gave in.

Aizawa took Shouto in soon after the war ended, with his own family either having left or died there wasn’t much to go back to. It took a few months to notice that Shouto was staying behind for the holiday seasons, each student going back to their family would leave the doors empty. So when he and Aizawa had to go back to dorms mid holiday as he had forgotten a gift, finding Shouto in the common space watching movies was the last thing he expected.

Since then they’d pretty much become brothers since, it wasn’t down on papers but he knew what Shouto meant to him. So calling Saruki his niece wasn’t something he hesitated to do, it’s not like many people knew about her anyways. The few that knew that Shouto had Saruki, most knew she was his own child and not from the story he made up.

Near enough made up, he laughed when Shouto had relayed the story he told Katsuki about how Saruki came about. The story wasn’t necessarily a lie but it wasn’t a story about her or a person, it was his cats.

Shadow was his black kitten he had gotten a few weeks after Saruki was born, the kitten was drenched in rain water when he found her. On one of his night shifts he had taken a shortcut down an alleyway, tripping over a cardboard box and falling into a puddle.

There were cries immediately and he turned to find a kitten shivering, drenched to the bone as it tried to roll over onto its belly. Next to it was a larger cat, what he assumed to be the mother but there was no signs of movement so he moved closer to prod her but she was stiff. It seemed she had died soon after giving birth as she didn’t even lick of the blood and umbilical cord attached to the baby.

Animals and humans were different, even more so with the evolution of everyone having a second gender and succumbing to their primal instincts every other month. It was something he hadn't learnt from doing undercover work, he realised just how much people would give into their instincts. Some would hurt people they loved, even themselves if they lost control and didnt have suppressants on hand and that's why he made it his duty to keep an eye on Shouto since his new-found gender.

When it came to recessive omegas, their glands didn’t fully develop which then affected how they mated and came to bear children. Especially with Shouto still not having had his first heat, his body hadn’t been ready to even carry a child. His hips weren’t wide enough to naturally deliver Saruki but that was his only option as medicine would only prolong it. The lack of constant pheromones from the mate, made the pregnancy worrying.

Saruki wasn’t growing as quickly as she should, she was as small as a 7month fetus when she was born. Shinsou remembers holding her for the first time, he could hold her in the palms of his hands when he cupped them together. The doctor had advised to keep her bundled up constantly as she couldn’t regulate her temperature correctly.

When changing her nappies or even bathing her she would constantly shiver, it didn’t help with her being born in the coldest season. Shouto mostly kept her skin to skin, his body constantly being a furnace to keep her warm enough that her skin flushed red all over.

Shinsou himself has only seen her fully comfortable when she was in her parents arms. Bakugo would always run hot, winter was the other time where he didn’t have a layer of sweat clinging to him. Shouto had always been able to self regulate doing it unconsciously, so if he felt even a jitter from saruki he would use his left side.

Bakugo calling his number was not on his radar at all, he even questioned how he got his number as they never interacted unless they were with Shouto. Shinsou left it to ring and waited for a message back, anything Bakugo had wanted from him had something to do with Shouto and now maybe even Saruki.

Unknown - Eyebags don’t pretend you don’t know who it is, pick up the phone.

Shinsou - Are you only insulting me over text because I can't use my quirk on you?

Unknown - Just fucking pick up i ain’t got time for your antics today.

Shinsou dialled him back, “What’s so urgent I got the great explosion murder calling me at 4am?”

“Don’t fucking call me that, where’s Shouto?” Bakugo was all bite and no bark, especially when he wanted something out of you.

“Where do you think a person who has a four month old baby would be at 4am Bakugo?” He just knew his sarcastic comment would piss him off.

“Don’t act smart, so he’s at home so then you got the night shift.”

“Yeah and i’m guessing you’re not because when did you keep your phone on you when on shift?”

“Let’s cut this shit short, you finish at 8am right?” Why was this idiot watching his schedule?

“Yeah, a bit weird that you know my schedule?”

“Cut the shit, all night shifts are the same you idiot I used to do when I was an intern.”

“So what do you want with me? My time isn’t free.”

“I need to meet with you when your shift is done, the cafe behind that ramen shop that burned down last week.”

“Who says I ain't got something to do after my 10 hour shift? Like sleep?” Sleep was the last thing he craved but it was better than being on the phone to a ticking time bomb.

“If you slept after your shift I wouldn't call you eyebags, see you at 8:30 sharp.”

“I’ll think about it when I get the cha-“ beep “That bitch hung up on me.”

~

Shinsou got through his shift quickly, keeping his interactions with villains quick so he could stay warm. Keeping between tall buildings was his way of keeping out the harsh winds off of him, his hero suit was made for protection: in moments like these he wished it was for insulation.

He got to the cafe at 8:31 just to piss him off, his uniform still tight to his skin under his hoodie as he had only enough time to drag on what was in his locker. Bakugo was sitting in a booth at the back, feet cocked up on a stool as he stirred his coffee with another cup opposite his.

“Double shot espresso?”

“Yeah, but it’s probably cold because you’re late.” As if he was ever on time to anything.

“A minute less of heat isn’t a big deal, this is only ¥600. Means you only paid for 4 minutes of my time, get on with it.”

“Shouto went crazy the last time I saw him, he hasn’t let me come back to the house since.”

Crazy?

“What do you mean went crazy?”

“I was looking after Saruki whilst he slept, he didn’t wake up until late in the evening. I don’t know how long he had been awake for but if i had to guess it was a few minutes cause i heard noise from the stairs.”

“Get to the point.” Talking with a loud mouth was the last thing he wanted after a night shift.

“I was in Saruki's room, putting the last pieces on the shelves and Shou came rushing into the room. Blood was running down his forehead and his eyes were going everywhere, he was muttering about how he didn’t hurt her.”

“Shit.” It's still happening?

“You don’t seem surprised, why would he think he’d hurt Saruki?”

“This has happened before that’s why I'm not shocked, the only difference is that he did hurt Saruki even if not intentionally.”

“What?”

“It was a small accident, Shouto had been by himself for probably the longest time before. It was barely 12 hours since I'd left for my shift when I got the call.”

“Half a day? So what shit went down then?”

“Shouto had heated up her bottle as he usually does once a night except this night he did it twice, she burnt most of throat and her tonsils.” He knew he shouldn't be saying this but Shouto would never tell him and he didn't want this guy on his ass more than he needed.

“How the fuck do you heat up a bottle twice?”

“Don’t criticise him, he hasn’t been well for a while and he forgets things sometimes. It’s not his fault so that’s why me and Sero keep an eye on him.”

“What do you mean? Is he sick?”

“Not necessarily but he needs people around him, especially now with the baby.” He couldn’t straight up tell him he has postpartum depression, that would bring on a whole load more questions. Questions he didn't have time for.

“I want to be around him, so you guys can get back to what you were doing before.”

“Are you telling us to back off?”

“I want Shouto to know he’s able to rely on me, enough that he trusts me to look after Saruki. I'm not throwing away our relationship unless he says outright he wants me to fuck off.”

“Honestly man, do you know what you actually want from Shouto? Cause i don’t want you to be giving him false hope.” He sipped lightly from his cup.

”I am fully dedicated to give Shouto anything.” Katsuki could only tell the truth to him. “Whatever i’ve fucked up enough for him to not speak to me in a year, i want to fix.”

“When you say anything do you truly mean anything?”

“Why would i say that then go back on my -“

“What about the baby? He comes as a package you know, a lot changes in a year.” Shinsou had to be sure of his intentions, his brother needed something permanent in his life.

“What about her? I’m gonna be there for both him and her, i’d be there more often if the fucking commission didn’t have me on the clock 24/7.”

“So from what I'm hearing, you want to be with Shouto, which also means you’re willing to become a father figure for Saruki.”

“… a father?” It seemed he wasn’t expecting that question, it was the first one he hesitated to answer.

“I know my brother well enough, I don’t think Saruki is going anywhere anytime soon. So you’d have to accept her before even considering a future with Shouto.”

“Shou is gonna keep her? Did he tell you that?” Shinsou could tell Bakugo was holding back from saying his true feelings, it’s not like they were close even when Shouto and him were together.

“He doesn’t have to outright say it but she’s here to stay, I knew that from the moment I met her.“

“I can be a father figure for her and don’t think I'm doing this just to get back with Shou. I only do things i want to, fuck what anyone else thinks.”

The memory of him seeing Saruki and Bakugo together for the first time came to his mind, both of their hair all fluffed up from sleep. Bakugo being half asleep but ready to fight him to protect a baby he’s met once, with a hanger as the weapon. Saruki had a red hue to her cheeks, probably with how bundled up Shouto wraps her for bed.

They looked identical in that moment, both their eyes fierce, one with anger and one with excitement. It was uncanny how much she took after him, even her few characteristics especially when she cried. Loud and demanding, she loved being held no more than Shouto loved holding her close to him.

Saruki had only reached 4 months old, in that time her character showed more with the time that she was around Bakugo. She’d throw her bottle around once she was done with it, barely finishing half of it but he assumed it was because she was used to being breastfed.

How Shouto managed to keep it hidden when he was with Bakugo for two days was shocking. Saruki practically wails if she doesn’t get what she wants, unless Bakugo had managed to soothe her enough to not want to be breastfed. If he could do that, without needing to take her on a walk he would consider giving him a compliment.

Shinsou took a look at the man in front of him, the one who wanted to court his brother and maybe even marry him. It’s not like he has anything against him, not with his relationship with Shouto anyways. Before they even started dating, there was always a smile on his face when he was mentioned, something rare to see on Shouto back then

The reason they broke up was still a mystery to him, Shouto never told him even when he subtly questioned if he should beat him up. It seemed deep enough that Shouto even kept a baby a secret, a whole pregnancy and even made up a story to cover it up. If he took the time to line up the dates of when Saruki was born then when she was conceived, he didn’t get a good picture.

If Bakugo had ever hurt his brother in any way, especially in that way he would kill him. No hesitation, hero license revoked and straight to Tartarus with what he had in mind. Shouto was far from defenceless but sometimes he didn’t stand his ground, too considerate of others feelings and not his own.

“Being a father isn’t a temporary thing, remember that. It isn’t one year, isn’t sixteen years or even when they become an adult you are there for her until your very last breath. Understand?”

“Yeah as if i didn’t fucking know that?”

“So you wanted help to get back with my brother?

“You’re making me sound like a desperate ex.” It would be the Bakugo Katsuki to state the obvious.

“Well isn’t that what you are?”

“You little shi-“

“First piece of advice, you have to earn my respect and that means not attempting to kill me every time I am right.”

“You’re never fucking right all you do is -“ He started to pull his hood up,“Yeah, yeah so what your next piece of advice smartass.”

“It’s my only piece of advice, keep close to him and don’t ask too many questions. He’ll push you away.”

“Well anyone could have told me that.”

“Yeah but it’s me telling you, so take the advice or leave him alone.” He was the closest to Shouto, he couldn't get this information from just anyone.

“And also he doesn’t want the media on him and even more so the baby, don’t bring Saruki in public places without letting Shouto know.“

The picture was saved for this specific occasion, so he whipped out his phone and showed Bakugo the picture of him and Saruki in the store. He could recognise his niece anywhere, even if just the tip of her nose would make his eyes lock onto it. Luckily, it was only her mittened fist waving in the air that was captured but to the media that was more than enough to dig for some crazy story.

“As much as I avoid the media myself, I like to keep myself updated.”

“Fuck, I focussed more on covering her up than myself.” He could see the honest regret on his face, he'd be forgiven. For now.

“Well you are a top ten hero, people would be interested if he was carrying a baby around.”

“Did Shouto say anything to you?”

“No not yet and if it’s about this photo, i’ve already cleared it up with Izuku’s help putting the PR in their place.” And Shouto won’t ever know, his brother needed less stress about his baby than anything else.

“That nerd loves abusing his power since he became the number four.” Katsuki pursed his lips and sipped the rest of his coffee.

“It’s to protect the people close to him, he doesn’t care if others change their opinions of him.”

“Well if that’s all you can give me, I'll be off to start my shift in four hours and unlike you I can't work on just coffee.” He could tell Bakugo didn’t wanna hear gloating about izuku surpassing him.

Bakugo set a few bills in front of him, leaving the store and slamming the door behind him. Shinsou ran the money through his fingers, he counted it to be ¥10,000.

Guess his advice was worth a good amount.