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English
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Published:
2024-05-01
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998
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1/1
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short, easy words

Summary:

Roy struggles with having what is definitely more than "a feeling" when Jamie's "dad" goes back to his abusive ways. A short exploration of Roy's feelings and choosing gentleness even when all you want to do is scream.

Notes:

(See the end of the work for notes.)

Work Text:

Roy slammed his car door and stalked towards his house, making sure to pace himself slow enough that Jamie, who was lagging behind, stayed in eye-sight. Even with anger rushing through his veins, Roy had enough sense to know he didn't want to take his anger out on Jamie.

Again.

"This ain't necessary." Jamie mumbled sullenly, twisting his hands in his sweatshirt as Roy fumbled with his keys to get his door open.

Roy shot him a glare as he succeeded with the keys and yanked the door open. "In, Tartt." He ordered.

Jamie rolled his eyes and stomped into the house, predictably huffing under his breath as he did. The behavior was childish but unlike it used to, it didn't annoy Roy. There was something reassuring about the peacocking Tartt did, the way he bristled and puffed out his chest despite the fact his posturing did nothing to hide the emotions scrawled across his face. It also felt eerily familiar but Roy wasn't interested in thinking into that.

Not to mention the fact that Roy didn't really have a leg to stand on if he wanted to complain about Jamie being huffy. His sister would kick his arse if he tried. After she finished laughing her head off at the hypocrisy.

Roy strode into the living room after relocking the door, finding Jamie exactly where he'd expected; sprawled on the couch, arms wrapped defensively around his body, staring at nothing, the black eye adorning his face highlighted by the angle.

For a moment, Roy did nothing, watching the younger man. Part of him wanted to snap at Jamie, just to get his anger out, to do something other than simmer in the fury caused by the stunning bruise surrounding his star player and [FUCK] his best friend's eye but he swallowed the urge with difficulty.

Jamie didn't deserve to be snapped at. Fuck. Roy could do better than that. He could.

Sure, he struggled with having a feeling but he was doing better. And he wasn't a monster. He didn't want to fucking hurt Jamie, to make him curl further in on himself and leave. In fact, he had the intense impulse to do exactly what he'd done last time a situation like this had arisen; hug the man.

But he couldn't just hug Jamie, could he? FUCK. Roy growled in annoyance, making Jamie jump and turn to stare at him.

"I'm cooking dinner." Roy blurted, hating himself immediately for the awkwardness but determinedly doubling down on the statement. "Chicken. And stir fry. Why don't you put on that baking show you and the lads fancy?"

Jamie blinked a couple times, turning slightly on his perch to stare. "The Baking Championship?" He asked, lips twitching slightly, the first sign of a smile Roy had seen from him all day. "The one you introduced to me and the lads?"

Roy's face heated and he made a face, waving a hand. "Don't be a prick, Tartt, just turn on the TV." He said and then, before he could change his mind, strode into the room, coming to a stop in front of Jamie. He stood awkwardly in front of the man for a moment, trying to convince himself a hug wouldn't be as humiliating as he thought it would.

The problem was, it was one thing to hug Jamie after his dad treated him like shit in public but it was definitely an entirely different fucking thing to hug Jamie because Roy felt like shit after finding out Jamie's scumstain of a "dad" had fallen off the wagon and given Jamie a black eye.

He wanted to hug Jamie not just to make Jamie feel better but also because Roy fucking wanted to hug him, wanted to convince himself the man was really okay. He fucking wanted to hug his [FUCK] best friend and wipe the devastated look he'd been carrying around off his face.

He warred, not just with the idea of hugging Jamie and having a feeling, but with the guilt wrapped around his lungs, screaming that he didn't deserve to hug Jamie and make himself feel better.

"Why are you hovering over me like a creep?" Jamie asked, reaching for the remote and eyeing Roy. "Stop."

Roy growled, rolling his shoulders with discomfort and then bit the bullet. He lurched forward, enveloping Jamie in a tight hug that made his leg ache at the angle but immediately settled the rage clinging to him. Jamie was stiff for a moment, not making a move and Roy almost pulled back, despite the comfort the man's warmth brought him-

But then Jamie shifted, almost falling against him, head bumping into Roy's collarbone as he hugged him back, clinging to him. Roy squeezed him tighter, automatically and they stood in silence for a minute. Jamie was cold - that wasn't a surprise, the man always seemed chilly no matter the weather. But in Roy's arms, he was solid, heavy and real.

Roy was still angry - he didn't stop being Roy fucking Kent just because he'd initiated a hug - but it was tamable now. It was background and he could admit, at least in the privacy of his mind, that hugging his [FUCK] best friend was helping.

Roy inhaled and exhaled, resting his head against Jamie's shoulder. "I'm sorry." He said, the words coming easy with the man pressed against him.

Jamie sniffed, face still pressed against him. "I know." Was all he said, his breath warm against Roy's skin, voice quiet and wavering but certain. "I know."

Roy knew he'd regret staying in that position later - his knee and back were already protesting adamantly - but he didn't move, just relaxing in the embrace.

Damn his knee and repression. If Roy could stand having [a] feeling[s] for Jamie, he could also stand to ice his knee later after he'd cooked dinner for him and Jamie. He'd be fine. They'd both be fucking fine. He was going to make sure of it.

Notes:

If you got here, tysm! I'd really appreciate any comments, especially if you have any notes. I'm trying to get back into writing more and I'm hoping this wasn't too bad. I've only written parts of stories for this fandom before, so I'm not entirely sure if I've gotten their characters right.
The title is a quote from Winnie The Pooh that reminded me of Roy, btw.
Stay safe, y'all. Tnx again for reading. <3