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Chapter Text

Draco’s cottage, Cornwall, 14th May 2008 - 3.45pm

Draco stood staring at the note attached to the front of his door for the better half of thirty minutes. He had been out seeking a suitable pair of denim jeans to wear for his twenty eighth birthday which was only a few weeks away. Living in the muggle world for the better part of eight years once he realised how the wizarding world would always view him, judge him for the part he played for the choices he was never given. He and Harry were two sizes of the same coin, one chosen for greatness, the responsibilities thrust upon him at a young age would result in a life-time of admiration from all around him. Draco however was chosen to pay for his fathers mistakes, the responsibilities to keep his family alive thrust upon him and left him no way out of horrific actions, meaning a life-time of people assuming that is who he was all along. No matter his circumstances the wizarding world did not care. 

The muggle world seemed a relatively better place for Draco to be. He was in training to be a muggle healing assistant, what the muggles called a nurse. He was set to finish his first year of university and then a summer long break filled with fun plans with his fiance before returning to study further. Is what he thought the plans were before he found this note, a few words scribbled and Draco’s world was once again changed out of nowhere, 

‘This is Stephan’s father - he has moved home, you have twelve days to vacate the property.’

Draco & Pansy’s blackberry messenger chat. 

[Draco Spears] *attached picture* 

[Pansy Aguliera] … 

[Draco Spears] Not even from himself, from his FATHER! I may have in the past been one to play the daddy card, but !!! in our lord's year of ‘08 at the ripe age of 29 he leaves a note via … his father???? 

[Pansy Aguliera] Darling, I am not surprised. Nothing can shock me at this point. I do hate this horrific form of communication, I keep this awful device for you. Come home, love. Floo to my flat in London. 

[Draco Spears] Where am I to live? I don’t have any money! I am a student. 

[Pansy Aguliera] Floo to the flat. We will have to sort something out, my love, have faith. 

[Draco Spears] Faith is not a friend to Draco Malfoy. 

[Pansy Aguliera] I’m rolling my eyes, darling. 

[Draco Spears] What of Weaslbe, Well born and Scarhead? 

These were Draco’s three (two of which are very large) cat’s, Weaslbe his ginger tabby he rescued on his 21st Birthday, Well born a bushy brown cat that found her way to him after one of the worst occurrences of his life when he was twenty six. Scarhead came a few months later, the runt of the three. Horrible skinny little cat until he filled out recently. Distinctive scar above the cat's eye standing out amazingly amongst the black fur, Draco couldn’t resist. Couldn’t get rid of him really, he found Draco as if he seeked him out. Then followed him home and never left. He did exhaust all options to see if Scarhead belonged to anyone but no one came forward, he seemed to belong to Draco. 

He had twelve days, could he do it with a broken heart? though a broken heart is not due to the relationship ending, which had been happening for quite some time. Draco had time to accept it, he basically shared the last almost eight years with Stephen and it was a nice, refreshing time away from all that happened. Until the war and fight to keep himself alive moved from the wizarding world to within the walls of the place he once called home. The cottage was small and wasn’t much to look at on the inside, a far cry from Malfoy Manor yet Draco found sanctuary.. Once upon a time.. Or a dream. 

For one day Draco woke up and his fairytale life wasn’t a fairytale, it was a living nightmare. Most of his shame comes from begging Stephen to be decent towards him, long before back at Hogwarts Draco was maybe not so nice himself. Nasty to many of the other students. He is regretful of a lot from the way he behaved back then. Though Stephen doesn’t so much remind Draco of his former self but someone much worse. Draco almost forgot what fearing for his life felt like, he spent so long in temporary bliss. He has spent his recent days in survival mode. 

So, the heartbreak comes from a place where he found his person, they both made sacrifices. Draco gave this his all, poured everything to cater to Stephen, moved in even before the year mark. Did everything to ensure his boyfriend, then fiance's happiness and in return there was not even the grace of giving him a little more time to move out or to tell Draco to his face, or send a message to him by himself. Draco has a bit of savings for the fear this may one day happen, he did think when the time came he would have more time. The broken heart is the broken promise that somewhere out in the world there are good people who will find you if you also are a good person. 

He supposed this happened to the lucky ones, the Harry Potter’s of the world. He was not Harry Potter though he was Draco Malfoy. It was an exceptionally lonely thing to be Draco Malfoy, Stephen made that .. less, even when he was horrible because the good times always returned. Even though it all never did a day pass where Stephen did not make him smile. Time going on he would make him cry and feel fearful a lot more than smile, but the smiles still came naturally through that. What a horrible mess Draco landed himself, checking underneath the pot where the key once rested to find nothing at all. As he heard Scarhead meow he took a breath and looked around. He was very much wandless, and had not carried one in a long time.

“You’re on your own kid,” he said to himself, ‘You always have been’ said a voice.

Dingy club toilet, Brighton, 15th May 2008 - 3.45am 

Harry was thoroughly snogging a man whose name he couldn’t quite remember but it was better that way! Easier, no room for mess or any of that painful nonsense. Harry was perfectly happy being a casual lover to someone, or a nameless fuck. Whatever suits! The man was definitely at least ten years older than him, not that that mattered, not when he looked the way he did and seemed just as hungry for Harry as Harry was for an escape from reality. 

Who would have thought all that at Hogwarts turned out to be the easy part? Sometimes he couldn’t believe this is the adulthood he fought hard to reach, sometimes when he looks in the mirror and thinks of the seventeen year boy he once was he wants to tell him not to get the train back to life. He thinks what would have happened had he gone on, reunited with Sirius, with his parents, Remus, Fred, Tonks. Everyone who’d gone. Maybe something good was beyond that train journey, Sirius had looked better in his ghostly form than he had been when Harry knew him on earth, which Sirius was never ugly on earth either. He was rather handsome, even in the shrieking shack. Harry feels he grew into his own looks, but isn’t as good looking as his god father was. He supposes he looks like his dad would have had he lived to nearly twenty eight. 

He does still get told how much he looks like dad, though he fears that will fade in time he will be thirty in just two years and James Potter never lived past twenty one. His eyes though, they’ll stay the same, always be hers. He heard someone once say when you fall in love, fall for the eyes for that is the part that stays the same, the rest will age with time. So he’ll always look into the mirror and see a part of Lily while time removes James from the traces of his face. He did actually hear for the first time last week that he looked like his grandad Fleamont when he had been young, he doesn’t know what to make of that. He trusts he’ll soon only hear of that and not how he looks like his dad. He supposed neither of them ever kept their wild hair as long as Harry had his now, he constantly had to tie it up.

The man whispered something in Korean and Harry shivered and pressed his hands again’t the other man's trousers, making eye contact waiting for a sign of approval before he touched him. The man nodded, giving Harry the go ahead he started to slither his hand over to give the man some (well needed it turned out) pleasure. He kissed the man’s jaw while he got him off, Harry’s nose ring somehow got caught in the man's hair at one point. While he tossed the man off he thought of the beach, weird but he thought of sitting in Brighton beach with someone else unknown man, faceless and blonde, he was holding hands with him and smiling. A fairy tale he shook his head before pressing his warm mouth to the man’s once more while the song blurred from outside the bathrooms, 

‘Shake that ass for me, come on, girl Shake that ass for me’

They were just bodies to each other. A short-term fix, a quick relief of the physical touch of another. That is more practical, more aligned with how the world works than whatever fantasy Harry would play out in his head. He had to accept that or be swallowed whole by the same world he fought to save.

Pansy’s Flat, London, 15th May 2008- 6.07am

She hated that she was not surprised, and hated how the words ‘I told you so’ played on her lips. Too soft to let them spill out just yet while Draco sobbed in her kitchen wondering what was going to become of him. She soothed him for hours, she almost thought he would never calm down. In the end had to make him take a sleeping draught to sleep which he was once accustomed to taking after the war. He had not taken potions for anything in years, which Pansy told him was ridiculous, luckily he listened tonight. Draco was not in the right state to be awake, too hysterical and unable to calm for more than ten minutes at a time. 

His hope seemed to dwindle, she would have to find him anything to be hopeful for. They both knew Draco needed to find somewhere to stay and they both knew it could not be with Pansy who found herself to be heavily pregnant, seven months along with Neville Longbottom’s child. She had not told Neville yet, she had avoided him since she began to show. What they had was casual so when she stopped accepting owl invitations to go out he seemingly got the message and understood quickly that what they once had was now over. 

Neville had been working as a Herbology teacher the last year in Hogwarts, living full time and meeting once a fortnight in the three broomsticks for drinks and sex. She doesn’t think teenage Pansy would believe her if she told her she conceived a child with Longbottom outside of Hagrid’s hut after a night of drinking with them both inside. She hated to admit it but Hagrid was marvellous company. She had been lonely without Draco, she did visit monthly at least. Blaise was always there, not so much lately. Which means he is seeing someone. He always disappears when he is serious about someone. He’ll pop up sooner or later to tell her how it went or how it’s going. 

Theo is travelling, and she never played nice enough to make proper friends with any of the girls in her year. It was mostly lonely apart from the unignorable life growing inside her, swelling her up. She would tell Neville eventually.. Maybe.. She had to..right? Did she? She huffed out a breath, the last night they met she thought about telling him. She pretended at first to be too hungover for drinks so they shared a meal and it felt nice, right up until she noticed the exchange he and Hannah Abott shared, Hannah who was set to take over as landlady for the bar from Rosmerta in a few months. 

Not only was she having Longbottom’s baby but she had seemingly managed to allow him to lose his full attention from her. She dares not think what teenage Pansy would say about a Hufflepuff running off with the father of her child. She threw a blanket over Draco who was now sound asleep on her sofa. 

“How the mighty have fallen, eh Draco?” she chuckled before bending down to kiss his hair, which proved a tremendous struggle. She can’t help thinking about the people she and her friend once were, she can’t help wishing as she thinks back to many moments she could scream through time and stop it all happening. She can’t though, it did happen, things continue to fall apart. Time goes on.

Chapter Text

Pansy’s London flat, 15th May 2008 - 12pm

Draco and Pansy cooked and ate breakfast together, gossiping about school friends and Draco filling Pansy in on the celebrity gossip in the muggle world. They laughed and judged others and it made him feel almost human again, feeling a lot better than he did the night before Draco realised he has to take matters into his own hands and try to get in contact with Stephan, the cats cannot be left alone in a cottage without access to food or water. Draco needs to step up and get them and bring them to a safe location, he can’t rely on Pansy; she has too much going on with being two months away from giving birth. The image of which is rather frightful. He pulled out his Blackberry phone and dialled the number ‘Arse lick’ who was one of two of Stephen’s only friends who had not really bothered to see him much during the time he and Draco were in a relationship but all of a sudden became very arse licking towards him as the relationship began to end. 

“Hello,” Draco said when arse lick answered the phone, 

“Hi Draco, what is the matter?” Arse lick said in a condescending voice, 

“It is just Stephan has-”

“Stephan wishes no contact with you, if you try and contact him whether that be via a friend such as myself or show up at it his house it can be viewed as harassment,” the arse lick breathed, 

“I am not looking to rekindle the relationship by any mean,” Draco confirmed slowly, “I was the one to suggest several times it should end, the thing is-”

“I cannot pass along any information, It is Stephan’s wish that he breaks the cycle,” Arse lick cut across. Draco tried to calm himself, ‘breaking the cycle’ was a term Draco learned from a book he read, about a situation similar to what he was facing within his relationship to Stephan. His former boyfriend used to relish in using Draco’s own words to hurt him, while he agreed the cycle needed to be broken, he feels it could have broken without him having little to no time to relocate himself and the cats. 

“Agreed. Though this doesn’t feel like the cycle breaking, it feels like a power move. A grand finale if you will in my mistreatment,” Draco bit his lip. Stephan had little power moves left to play beforehand, anything he said to try and hurt him Draco could counter. He was foolish enough to delude himself into thinking he had a ‘handle’ on how he was being mistreated, fool. 

“Whether that is the case or not Stephan’s wishes are you do not contact him, He can’t afford the arrears the place was going to be taken away anyway, you are an adult Draco.”

“He is also an adult, he should have had the conversation with me about the arrears he had me take him out to dinner last week and give him money to see his other friend. This could have been sorted with an adult conversation, I could have paid them or paid towards it instead of throwing my money around foolishly. Can’t you see this is a way of getting off without accountability. I am an adult but so is he, I need to get into the cottage to get my cats at least.” Draco was starting to feel hysterical. 

“Give me the phone,” Pansy whispered angrily. He decided not to, he walked into the other room trying to sort this himself. 

“Well I cannot help you with that,”

“I understand you cannot. However Stephan would have a key,”

“He does not wish contact and this conversation is against his wishes. I can’t help you sorry,” The friend of his boyfriend seemed to be growing weary with the conversation.

“I don’t want to see him or meet up perhaps if he contacted-”

“He isn’t going to contact anyone. You need to better yourself, Draco.” Arse licker cut in. Draco started to shake, because he had been bettering himself. How much he has come in is tremendous and while he still has so far to go, it seems his setbacks often involve the abusive relationship he was in. You see Stephen never left when Draco needed to work on himself, he got worse the more he did work on himself, for the more he did the more he called out the mistreatment. The more he wasn’t willing to tolerate. Which resulted in this,

“Yes, I am trying to but for me to continue to do that I need to get my cats safe. They were both our responsibility. We both had talks and agreements before bringing them and if he is going to abandon the cats then ok but I am not going to. I owe the cats that.” Draco bit down on his lip again this time drawing blood… he hated thinking how the cats would hide and cower when Stephan was doing what he did to Draco. Draco thought with staying he was saving them all until he could get out. In the end he couldn’t prevent the inevitable; this was only ever going to end one way. This isn’t the first time Stephen ran away; this was simply the first time he was too cowardly to face him himself. 

“Stephan does not feel he is responsible, nothing can be done,” Arse licker said.

“Don’t you see what he’s doing,” Draco whispered, when Arse Licker and Stephan got back into contact a few months ago Draco disclosed the abuse over a message. He was begging anyone from Stephan’s side to see how he was mistreating him and hoping they would converse with Stephan on how it was wrong. How utterly pathetic. He thinks back to his time at Hogwarts, how he was then, he thinks how it all changed when Voldemort came back. He promised himself when Voldemort was defeated he would never feel like that again, or more another person wouldn’t have that control on him. His life wouldn’t be on the line to please someone, he wouldn’t be in that situation again. Yet here he was, the only difference was Voldemort tagretted many, Stephan only targeted Draco. It was harder for others to see the monster when he was so charming. 

Accio Queers, Cornwall’s only LGBT magical bar. 17th May 2008 - 5.27pm

Harry wiped the cum off his chin smiling up at the man he just sucked off. He was very handsome. He had dark skin,a wondrous afro and beautiful hazel eyes. He offered to buy Harry a drink once he got off his knees. He regarded him for a moment then shook his head, better not. He knows what this is, what will happen if he seeks out more than the quick relief of human contact. If Harry pursued this further he would end up heartbroken, no one wanted what Harry wanted, no one wanted to continue to work on things to build something when the honeymoon stage ended. Feels like the world around him is chasing the high of the start but no one wants him when things get real. It’s ok though, he has his friends for company. As for the contact of another in that way, this is Harry’s only option. 

‘ Your skin, oh yeah, your skin and bones turn into something beautiful’

The song played as he left the bathroom, muggle radio was played from 3pm-8pm then Wizard Wireless would come on from 8pm until close. Harry shook his head at the romantic lyrics, who would have thought magic and wizards turned out to be real and that the fantasy was romance. His emerald green eyes locked on a very blonde head of fluffy hair wearing a leather jacket and the most amazing jeans (for the way they hugged his ass) which was bent over as he was leaning against the bar. It had to be Draco Malfoy, but it just couldn’t be. 

‘I jumped across for you, oh, what a thing to do 'Cause you were all yellow’

Then he heard his laugh, it was Malfoy, almost melodic to Harry’s ears. Yet, he knew that this was Draco’s fake laugh, when he was trying to charm someone or act as if he was nice, well he may be nice now, right? It’s been what? Over a decade. Harry felt like he might lose balance before catching himself in the mirror and desperately fixing his messy hair into a bun and pulling down curls in strategic places. For some reason it was suddenly greatly important that Harry looked presentable. 

“Alright Jack, I’ll have a Firewhiskey double, on the rocks and whatever he is having.” His eyes glued to Draco as he turned around to face Harry. The two former school boy rivals face to face looking at each other, almost studying each other. For whatever reason Harry was forced to think of the Sun and Moon in full solar eclipse.

‘And your skin, oh yeah, your skin and bones turn into something beautiful and you know, for you, I'd bleed myself dry. For you, I'd bleed myself dry’

“Alright, ferret face,” Harry said casually grinning cheekily at Draco, who had grown up just as well as Harry often imagined, if not somewhat better. Fully grown into his features that were still rather pointy, he looked like a fallen angel who also happened to have his septum pierced. Sleeves rolled up, he had quite a lot of tattoos, the faded dark mark had been decorated with flowers and he had a lot of random ones around it and on his other arm. Harry’s mouth felt dry,

“Ah scarhead, fancy meeting the chosen one here,” Draco raised his eyebrow.

“Probably not that surprising,” Harry rolled his eyes, the prophet had a field day with the fact Harry was gay and at the time had been actively dating another bloke. 

“Suppose you never could stop oogling me while we were at school,” Draco teased, standing up to thank the bar man for his own double firewhiskey. As Harry accepted his own and then paid Jack for both he noticed Draco also had his bellybutton pierced, Merlin helped Harry. 

‘Look at the stars, look how they shine for you’

“Ch-cheers Jack,” his bright green eyes glued to the jewellery hanging off Draco’s navel,

“Old habits certainly do die hard.” Draco’s voice is full of the same arrogance from their school days. Fuck it, Harry didn’t mind, he was weirdly pleased to hear it. Maybe not so weirdly as the first time he discovered the art of self pleasure it had been after an argument with Draco. Feeling his neck heat at the embarrassment of the memory of his teenage years. Even more so as he realises Malfoy is skilled at legilimency. 

“Something like that, what brings you here then, Malfoy? Except the obvious,” Harry muttered, not really wanting to discuss blokes with Draco. 

“You mean in Cornwall?” he asked, Harry nodded, taking a sip. “I live here Potter, or rather lived here. You?” 

“Oh right, I just like moving around exploring bars and that since I gave up being an Aurror of course,” Harry scratched the back of his neck,

“Really? You gave up the heroics?” Draco asked, Harry furrowed his brows. Draco had not heard? He wasn’t sure what he had been up to, he knew Narcissa was staying with Andromeda, he saw her often when he was visiting Teddy but she would make herself scarce when Harry was around. He always wanted to ask about Draco; the desire burned him up every time he caught a glimpse of her. Harry spoke in her and Draco’s favour during the trial. In the end they were free, Luicius got a few short years in Azkaban and Malfoy Manor was seized. No one knows where Lucius went after he got out. Not even Narcissa according to Andromeda. 

“Not a fan of the prophet anymore are you not?” Harry teased, 

“Nope this is the first time I step foot into a wizarding location by choice for the better part of eight years,” Draco admitted. 

“Hang on, he’s seven right? turning eight soon,Your son I mean?” Harry blabbered out. Draco’s face softened and then looked very solem, he nodded. Harry heard Astoria Malfoy nee Greengrass died giving birth to a boy named Scorpius Malfoy, she had a blood curse and couldn’t withstand the birthing process. Custody battle for the baby took place immediately after, he heard Draco lost rights to his son by the time he was three months old, he knows Narcissa goes and visits the boy who lives with Astoria’s parents. He heard that the mother is getting very sick with the same blood curse and is finding it difficult to care for Scorpius. “Do you er do you see him?” Harry asked awkwardly, 

“Yes, I was allowed him to stay with me every weekend from his was three months until he was seven. Then I was taken back to court and had to appear again before the ministry as it turned out he was frightened of the boyfriend I was seeing. I was not aware of this, but I agreed to never have my former boyfriend around Scorpius so our weekend time turned into every other weekend. I would take him one day for a day out.” Draco’s heart looked like it was breaking, I had been studying at the point working towards higher education. Towards stability. I lost custody but I wasn’t going to seek it back until I could provide Scorpius a stable home environment, he deserves that.” Draco sniffed, “I got into university and gained more time with him.” Harry smiled as he heard this, 

“Why don’t you reapply for guardianship soon? His grandmother is getting sick, I don’t think she can continue to look after him properly. Since you are working on stability and clearly have left that tosser, shouldn’t you-” but Draco held his hand up.

“You see Potter, the world is not sunshine and rainbows. I only lost him in the first place because of the mark on my arm. Which was not the path I would have chosen to take but some of us get dealt a worse hand than others, that is just how it works.” 

“You can’t give up.” Harry shook his head, “I’lll speak for you. In court say how much you changed, yeah throw the ‘Harry Potter’ name about it a bit but fuck it, this isn’t fair.” Harry said,

“I have ten days to find somewhere to live because I stood up to say ‘tosser’ so, before I even think about getting guardianship of my son, I need to make sure I can provide him somewhere to live. I have applied for a few places, I will continue to try,” Harry listened while drinking as Draco explained how the twelve days now ten were sprung on him and how he struggled to get into help his cats. How he tried to get in but without a wand couldn’t do so smoothly, how no one would help and in a fit of temper he texted the exs friend saying he hope karma exists and the same happened to the ex, and when was met with a rude response he got even ruder and said he wishes it on all who helped the ex do this, which he isn’t sure he does wish thag but felt it in the moment. From what Harry can gather the reaction Draco has had to the abuse has been taken worse than the fact he has been abused, Harry is logical Draco’s wishes can’t do anything even if he meant them even if that made him bitter, it was still the exs actions. He went on to explained how the police had been called with Drafo trying to gain access to help the cats. How he almost got into trouble with them and how in the end his ex confirmed to the police via phone that Draco also lived there. So, Draco was able to stay in his old Cottage for the next ten days until he is able to find somewhere for him and all three of his cats, which Harry and him spend a good few minutes laughing at the name choice. 

“Can’t believe you named your cats after Ron, Hermione and I,” Harry chuckled ordering another round for them both, “Stay with me,” Harry blurted out as Draco laughed looking into his eyes causing him to shiver, 

“Have you lost your mind?”

“Look, I haven’t gone mental. Well completely mental, but you know I have space, so if only until you find somewhere else!” Harry tried, 

“No,” Draco shook his head, “I need to take responsibility. I stayed too long when the repeated behaviours,”

“You aren’t responsible for his behaviours, you did what you could you kept your son away which is a plus and yeah you stayed longer than you should have but you have just told me that was to prevent exactly what happened. Seems to me the bastard seen you were trying to get away safe, taking steps and couldn’t stand it.” Harry shrugged, “You are not responsible for his behaviour,” he repeated.

“But I am for finding myself a new place to stay.” he looked down at his firewhiskey glass, 

“Yes, but you have been given a ridiculously short time for that. So, stay with me, yeah? Gives you more time at least.” Harry cleared his throat.

“I need to try to stand on my own two feet, for the second time in my life I need to learn again and rebuild from scratch.” the blonde man said grey eyes pouring into emerald ones, 

“Right, well if at the end of ten days, yeah? OWL me or something if you need help steadying your legs before you are able to stand on them yourself.” 

“Oh god listen to you, Potter,” Draco snorted and Harry punched him lightly, “You sound fucking stupid,” 

“Oi,” Harry flicked Draco’s pretty nose. 

“You do, listen to you trying to come up with those myspace/tumblr quotes,”

“Er the what sorry?” he pushed his own glasses up his face. 

“What are you going to come out with next ‘Alice had to fall before she got to wonderland’ or something?” Draco raised an eyebrow.

“No.” Harry scoffed, “You seem fond enough with these spacey tumbling quotes. Look at your rhyming them off,” 

“I said one Potter,” Draco retorted, Harry just gave him a look and they argued for the next hour. Draco insisted then he had to go on and keep trying to get his life together. He was sad to see the blonde go, though he loved to watch him leave. He was feeling like this hour long conversation was going to play on his mind way more than any bloke he ever had sexual encounters did. Draco didn’t kiss him, didn’t touch him but he demanded his attention in a different way that Harry was glad to give it he wanted to keep giving it he wanted to laugh like that again soon. He seemed to consume him whole within an hour … Yeah, Harry realised he was fucked as the next song started playing. 

‘I just can't get you out of my head, boy your lovin' is all I think about’

Chapter Text

Florean Fortescue’s ice-cream parlour, August 1998 - 2.22pm

Astoria was glad the war was finally over, she looked forward to what would be her first normal year of Hogwarts since she arrived at the school. She remembers how full of wonder she felt as she stepped off the boat as a bright eyed first year. Wobbling into the giant castle hoping to be sorted into Slytherin just like her sister had been two years prior. In the end she was a hat stall. The hat took over three minutes to decide whether she should be placed in Ravenclaw or Slytherin, before shouting Slytherin. 

The year Astoria arrived at Hogwarts the place was abuzz with the talk of an escaped mass murder from Azakban by the name of Sirius Black. She recalled being frightened in her dorm at night and sometimes sneaking up to Daphne’s dorm room. Her sister allowed her to sleep in the bed with her but often would bring up in the morning that she had to try to stay by herself, try at least. Trying came with great difficulty as the summer before Hogwarts was when she learned the women from her family were cursed, an ancient blood curse. At eleven years old she learned she was going to meet death early. How early she did not know. Most female family members don’t make it to 50, she heard. 

The thing is at eleven years old Astoria already felt a lot more tired than her peers, she needed to rest more, was it already kicking in? Didn’t she have time? Twenty years? Thirty years? Anything? Anxiety related to how long she would live seeped into every aspect of her first year of Hogwarts especially with Sirius Black on the loose of whom she would accidentally run into and he’d cut her life shorter than it was already being cut, stole her last years. She almost laughed when it was revealed just two years later that the man had been innocent all along, but by then the war was in full swing. All Astoria knew is she wanted nothing to do with Voldemort. 

Now a sixteen year old Astoria in a post-war world is just grateful to be here, she loves animals especially white cats and pygmy puffs. She loves the sound of the birds singing outside her bedroom window at home. She is grateful to be going into her sixth year and experiencing an ordinary school year, she is grateful for her sister though they fight. Her sister is returning to re-do her last year of school, another thing she is grateful for as the school year previous would have been her last. Thankfully headmistress McGonagall was giving last year's seventh years the chance to redo the year because of the circumstances the school found itself in. 

She feels the last school year weakened her significantly and had effects on Daphne too who was only now starting to show some of the early symptoms of the blood curse which Astoria showed at age 11. She didn’t know how much time she had but she had time and she was going to enjoy it and make use of it.

“Chocolate cherry with a scoop of chocolate chilli, please,” Astoria asked politely,

“Sure thing, coming up now darling,” Alyssa Fortescue said with a smile, she had taken over the shop from her uncle Florean, who was deeply missed by all customers who would never forget him. “Here’s your pistachio ice-cream Mr Malfoy,” Alyssa handed over the ice-cream her voice slightly less warmer than it had been when addressing Astoria, who spun her head round to see Draco Malfoy was standing in front of her. 

“Oh hi,” she smiled, he just half smiled in return as he reached for his ice-cream. “I heard about the trial, I am glad you got off. I doubt you had much choice in all that,” she said sincerely, 

“Bold assumption,” Draco scoffed before thanking Alyssa. 

“Educated guess,” Astoria shrugged, Alyssa started preparing her ice-cream cone. 

“Cheers,” he said sarcastically, “Really helpful that!”

“Perhaps more than your willing to see right now,” 

“What the hell does that mean,” he tutted walking past her,

“That it’s never a bad thing to know someone sees you, for who you are and that they are in your corner. The wand I possess may not be capable of opening the whole world's eyes though I wish it could. People will form their own opinions, I’m not sure that matters in the grand scheme of things though it can be an annoyance.” she said as Alyssa handed the ice-cream to her. Draco turned his head back, “Perhaps one day you will feel alright enough to put more focus on the people who do care, rather than ones too blinded by hatred to see anything other than what their own ignorant minds have made up,”

“I hope you have a nice quiet year at Hogwarts, goodbye,” Draco said almost robotically before turning his head back and walking out of the shop.

“I’d say that one is a lost cause,” Alyssa shook her head, 

“I don’t know, maybe not,” she shrugged, she doesn’t give up on people not that easily. 

Pansy’s Flat, London, 20th May 2008- 4.03pm 

Harry couldn’t manage much sleep worrying about Draco keeping him up at night. He had not seen Draco since that evening in Cornwall and kept track of the days Draco had four to find somewhere to live. Whether he had managed to do so or not Harry remained in the dark, which is why he wrote to Neville who had a fling with Pansy prior to dating Hannah to ask where she lived. Neville had been rather reluctant to give out her address but Harry explained, he hated telling someone about Draco’s situation but this wasn’t a gossip session he was trying to help the ferret-faced prick. 

“I was not expecting to see you here, Potter,” a very stunned Pansy Parkinson answered the door after Harry had been knocking it loudly and consistently until she done so. Harry was equally as stunned as she was, she wasn’t expecting to see Harry Potter hammering at her door and Harry wasn’t expecting to see Pansy Parkinson with a very pregnant stomach. 

“I- err - you are,”

“Potter, I must tell you it is extremely rude to point at a lady’s stomach be she with child or not,” Pansy raised an eyebrow, he was reminded of Draco and some of the shock wore off and he remembered why he was here at Pansy Parkinsons flat door in the first place.

“We need to talk about Malfoy,” 

“We do?” she crossed her arms looking amused, her green silk pj top starting to creep up exposing her bump slightly, but Harry would have to put a pin on asking her about that and who the father was… 

“Yes, and I think you know we do.” Harry asked, “If you were his friend and all you’d be concerned and want to talk about it! You would want to actually help him!”

“I do want to, I have been helping him! I have accompanied him to three flat viewings in the past week even though I do not wish to wander outside in this state and otherwise do not. My mother brings me my necessities.” Pansy sniffed, “I would have had Draco stay right here with me had this not been going on,” Pansy’s eyes travelled to her stomach then back up to Harry’s. 

“Er right, sorry,” he said, scratching the back of his neck, suddenly feeling awkward, “How did they go - er - the viewings? Did he get one of them? The flats, that is” Harry asked though he wished the ground would simply swallow him up.

“One said no due to the cats, one said the cats were ok but ultimately refused due to the fact he is still in higher education and can likely only acquire a part-time job whilst that is happening, he had an interview for one of those yesterday they should get back to him in the next few days,” Pansy yawned, 

“And the last um viewing? You said you went with him to view three flats…” 

“Yes indeed, similar to job he has to wait to hear,” she confirmed, 

“He is running out of time, he does know that!” Harry bit his lip.

“Yes, he has applied for a lot more than just those three, most dismissed right away due to the cats,” she rubbed sleep from her eye. “He is trying everyday I promise you that. He wallowed in his own pity for approximately a day and then gave himself a good shake. He may have even found somewhere by now with how offient he is being … but the cats,” 

“I offered him to stay at mine, him and his cats,” Harry said desperately, 

“Did you?” 

“Yeah, he er he didn’t mention seeing me in the bar?” Harry asked with a mortifying amount of hope, 

“He did,” Pansy smirked, “He left out the part of you offering him a place to stay, though I suppose that is because he is very much unwilling to take hand outs, seeing as his ex put only his own name on the cottage lease telling Draco as he didn’t work and was not in education at the time he would hurt their chances of being accepted. Draco paid the deposit flogging off some of the Malfoy jewels he still had in his possession, yet Draco found himself in the situation he has, all because he blindly and foolishly trusted someone.” 

“He can’t have known, he probably thought that twat was talking sense.” Harry shrugged, 

“Indeed, however, can you see how he could not want to put his whole life in someone else's hands again? Draco needs to rely on Draco right now, he won’t settle mentally if someone is chucking him a lifeline they can just pull away,”

“I wouldn’t”

“Of course, the noble Harry Potter. Though I must point out you and Draco never did seem to see eye to eye in school,”

“Long time ago, we both changed, grown since then,” Harry said firmly. 

“I should hope so, though you and Draco have not took time to see how the grown versions of you two would mesh together, in a living situation atleast. Draco obviously sees the potential for disater, I don’t think he’ll budge on this one.” Pansy sighs, 

“He can’t go back to him, he knows that right?” a tiny bit of hope in Harry’s voice, 

“He does, he already had his first ‘he isn’t coming to save me’ moment for the first time some days ago. As much as that gastly bastard would destroy Draco daily, he would also pick up the pieces daily, he would come to his rescue more often than not. Vicious cycle he ended up trapping him in, the one breaking him being the one putting him back together… We are all nearing our thirties now, it’s not like school. We have lives and jobs. I am designing robes and dresses from the flat now but before this I worked in office, Blaise is always god knows where with god knows who, though he is meeting Draco and I for dinner here tomorrow he has a new flame it appears,” Pansy chuckled, “Cunt as that man was, he was Draco’s person.” 

“But he didn’t love him, he can’t have, ending things the way he did. He didn’t give Draco any time to relocate himself, Scorpius didn’t ever want to be in the cottage because of him. He can’t have been his ‘person’ he can’t have,” Harry shook his head, 

“Just maybe not a very good one. I suppose this was all an act of cowardice, he does tend to flee when issues come up. I really can’t have seen it ending any other way. I did press Draco to find his own place ahead of all this. He did in the end take my advice, started to save money and put it away, the bastard caught on and next thing you know his dad left Draco a note to shield his pathetic grown up son from having an uncomfortable adult conversation” the pale dark haired woman sighed,

“Well he deserves a better person than that, no one who cares even slightly about another person's well being would do that. I’m sorry, to think any different is delusional, but what about the cats? Would he let me keep them um temporarily, I mean. He could get any old flat then for a while and would at least buy him more time to find a place that allows animals while he rents that!” the messy black haired tanned-skinned man smiled, 

“I am unsure, he does love those beastly things so much he may be willing to,” she yawned, “Again though that’s putting the cats lives and by extension his own in the hands of a man with pretty eyes all over again,” 

“You think my eyes are pretty?” Harry teased.

“Not as pretty as your ex-girlfriend's eyes I must say,” Pansy chuckled, “Look for what it is worth I will ask him, I will then owl you his answer, alright? But please for now I must nap, I am tired and as I stated already Draco will be over here for dinner tomorrow with Blaise and I, I will inform him then,” she promised. 

“Thank you,” Harry said and then turned to walk away and turned back, “The baby, is it Neville’s? I mean it's clearly your too but he's the father, yeah?You haven’t, um you haven’t told him have you,” Harry bit his lip, 

“Neville is the father?Bold assumption" she joked but Harry gave her a look that told her he wasn't for letting this go, "Tell him? I can’t see how I can,” Pansy said breathlessly, 

“I think the two of you have to have one of those uncomfortable adult conversations,” Harry shrugged smiling sympathetically, she gave him a look that clarified she knew he was right, “Good luck, not that you need it! You’ve always been a tough one,” he grinned. “You can handle this,” 

“Good luck to you too Potter, on whatever it is you are looking for,” she gave a small smile before closing the door, Draco Malfoy joyful and real laugh echoed in his mind.

Chapter Text

Draco & his ex’s texts 15 minutes before Draco arrived to the cottage and found the note

[Draco] Please, I am crying in the street for the 4th time this week. I am embarrassed, stop it, Why can’t you stop mistreating me? This is embarrassing at this point. I'm begging for you to be nice. 

[S.] I know and I’m sorry, please know that I am really sorry. What is wrong? 

[Draco] YOU. you are what's wrong. 

[Draco] I’m so burned out from this. I don’t have the energy to be nice, I think if someone else asked me into a relationship right now I’d say yes. 

[S.] That’s all you had to say. 

[Draco] Only because I am so, so tired of this, the cycle keeps repeating. I’m losing myself daily, you want back what we had? LET ME HEAL :( You are killing me. 

[S.] I know and I’m so sorry

[S.] please know that I am sorry for how much I mistreated you. 

[Draco] I just need to heal from the past year. If you give me time, everytime I work on myself I’m set back by the abuse. When I do feel better and even then you want to break up yet if I try to move on you threaten to kill the person. Just please let me heal. 

[S.] I am sorry for all of it, I really am. 

[Draco] Why do you keep saying sorry you are freaking me out.

Pansy’s London flat, 21st May 2008 - 3.55pm

“Draco why have you been rereading these? Delete the chat. I also warned you about communicating over this thing! He goads you into these big reactions and uses them to paint himself in a good light and you in a bad one,” Pansy said, frowning while pouring the tea as the two friends wait for Blaise to arrive.

“Don’t you see, I had written if someone asked to be with me I would say yes,” Draco breathed out, “I absolutely would not have. I am not in the headspace for that, I wasn’t wanting to be with him but if we both know he hates the thought of me moving on, If I had have kept my temper in check then maybe-”

“Then maybe he should have given you more notice. You offered to pay the rent for a few months and I offered to pay towards it but every time you try with him it’s denied. If he truly believed that he was foolish, It was clear to me you wanted to work on yourself and had been. He could have left without doing this, stop tearing yourself about there is no excuse! Nothing excuses this.” Pansy stirred the tea aggressively with her hand while her other hand had a wand gripped in it pointing it at the other cup to magically stir it. 

“I am embarrassed at how much I begged someone to act right. He didn’t want to, he wanted things to instantly be as they were when it would have taken time for anything, a friendship or whatever the hell he wanted. Whatever the case was he wanted it back instantly, he didn’t want to earn trust he acted nice for one day and would then throw a tantrum the next that I hadn’t instantly thrown myself at him,” Draco rolled his eyes and whispered a thank you to Pansy for making the tea, “The frantic attempts to ask him and those around him to act right/talk to him about acting right. Were to prevent what I felt like he was going to do. No matter what now he has the freedom to blame me. I wish he could see it wasn’t anyone else who I wanted to separate because of, regardless of feelings I may have developed when he pushed me to move on before demanding me back, it was never leaving for someone, it was always me leaving because of how he was treating me. His actions made me want to leave, nothing else. He hated when I said that any accountability made him worse, I am stupid I should have-”

“Well if he wasn’t willing to wait and put the time in that is his choice, he claims he ‘loves’ you but thinks you could have never got it, you claim you could have it would have taken time. In the end he doesn’t care enough to piece it back and I’m sorry but I am glad. You had a nice start to relationship, but the last year, I don’t know how anyone could put up with that,” Pansy scoffed, “Sory, my point stands if he doesn’t want contact that is his choice, however leaving you and the three cats which you both took care of less than two weeks to relocate homes is cruel and there was other ways to go about it. He could have let you move out safely with a decent time frame.”

“Yes, however no one cares. Just shields him, validates that he is not responsible. Though don’t people always make a whole ‘who-ha’ that a pet is for life not Christmas? Doesn’t he have the responsibility to make sure they don’t get put into a shelter?” Draco took a sip of the tea he no longer wanted. 

“Of course he does. He is acting cowardly and is able to because those around him baby him. He is a grown man fuck sakes, it feels like this teenager behaviour. Merlin sake whatever happens with this one,” She pointed at her stomach “I have come to the retaliation babying your child too much, especially when your son is an adult ! turns the child into a horrible, horrible human. Yes, if I keep him I want to be gentle but I am clearly going to have to find where the line is, or whoever takes him is going to have to be well prepared for what I expect for what I hope for him. I have no idea what I am doing, but whatever happens I won’t treat this decision lightly his life in my hands,” 

“Him?” Draco smiled, “You found out?”

“Did a gender reveal spell when I was bored,” Pansy shrugged. 

“Oh Pansy you do have a heart,” Draco teased, 

“You cannot prove that,” Pansy smirked. “I know I want to give him the best chance I can give him, I have also written to Neville and requested he meet me here tomorrow to talk about this,” Pansy rubbed her forehead. 

“Fucking hell, good luck,” Draco groaned, 

“And what of you? I take it you haven’t heard from the flat yet?”

“No, I have not. While waiting I did search the muggle papers, I found some people listing rooms for rent for a month. It’s not the best but it’ll buy me time,”

“It will do that at least,” Pansy’s eyes saddened as she drank her tea.

“I wouldn’t be able to take the cats, that's the thing. I refuse to abandon them how he did, you know they are family. They are living things not teddy bears. That muggle film I forced you watch ‘Family means no one gets left behind’ I am hoping if it’s just the month someone will look after them for me,” Draco bit his lip, “Just while I use that month to try secure somewhere, which I don’t know I am acting like its a given, I haven’t answered the ad yet.”

“Then let's do that now, before dinner is ready. Answer the ad, I could look after one of the cats for month,” she suggested

“You are pregnant,” Draco waved his hand, 

“Yes, so one is what I am willing to look after and as far as I feel capable of. The other two though Maybe Harry Po-”

“Please don’t, you know why I can’t-” he choked out, 

“Very well, then how about I send an owl to some people I know asking what they would consider?”

“Just for the month though, I need to make sure I get them back.”

“Yes, of course. Now write that owl,” she demanded, 

“Muggles don’t use owls. Answer the ad you mean? I’ll have to wait till after dinner to post it,”

“Whatever,” she rolled her eyes. 

“Hello,” Blaise called out. 

“Alright, who are you sleeping with then?” Pansy asked brazenly, 

“George Weasley,” Blaise grinned, 

“WHAT!” Draco and Pansy chorused, 

“Yeah, he has just come out to his family about being bisexual and he said I could tell you guys so,” Blaise beamed whilst taking his jacket off. 

“Ok, I need so much information!” she gasped. “Spill!” 

Three broomsticks - 17th December 1998 - 1.05pm

Astoria was laughing at Ginny Weasley’s impression of the Ravenclaw Quidditch captain. It was spot on, this month's hogsmeade trip allowed her to breathe and feel like she was just like everyone else, just a girl. 

“I mean I dated Michael Corner and I thought he was a sore loser but,” Ginny laughed, tossing her long orange locks back and rolling her eyes before taking a sip of butterbeer. Astoria was enjoying her sixth year of Hogwarts, she liked potions and came on leaps in Astronomy. Dropped defence against the dark arts and took on care of magical creatures instead.  Defensive magic was a necessity to learn but after the war what Astoria craved was peace, which came easier with tending to animals than it would have preparing for combat. 

Nice quiet life was not boring, her friends made her laugh, the animals made her smile. The only person she argued with these days was her sister. Rebuilding took great strength, everyone who dared to after the war had a lot of it. At night she still sees the Carrows when she closes her eyes, what they did to everyone. What they made her do, when she thinks of those moments she thinks of Draco Malfoy, he could understand she knows this but on a different level. He was forced into the ranks. She wonders what Draco Malfoy sees at night when he closes his eyes. 

Bookshop in Cornwall -  21st May 2008 - 6pm 

“Stalking me, Potter?” came a familiar voice, 

“Fucking hell, Malfoy! I’ve never been so glad to see you.” Harry grinned. 

“That certainly makes one of us,” the blonde man yawned, 

“Oh piss off,” Harry rolled his eyes before noticing the wand tucked in Malfoy’s jeans and thanking the universe, Draco Malfoy had his magic back. 

Chapter Text

Accio Queers, Cornwall’s only LGBTQ+ magical bar. 21st May 2008 - 7.29pm

It didn’t take much convincing for Harry to get Draco to the bar for a few drinks. Which Draco despised, this was the sort of thing he wanted to be able to resist. Turn men down and focus only on getting himself a place to stay, but of course Saint Potter batted his annoyingly long eyelashes a few times and Draco all but nearly fell down on knee. 

“So have you had much luck with um the whole er living thingy,” Harry waved his hand as the bartender sat a pint in front of Harry and margarita in front of Draco.

“I have to give it you, Potter,” Draco tutted, “You lasted over an hour without bringing it up, I imagine it took great difficulty seeing as you are a meldsome as a cornish pixie,” 

“Oh hark whose talking, I remember all too well what you were like in school,” Harry rolled his eyes, 

“I would certainly believe that, you didn’t leave me alone then and you don’t now.” Draco sipped his margarita, 

“Fuck off, you were the same. That midnight duel carrying on, I think you spent half your time in first year plotting to get me caught out doing something,” he waved his hand before gulping down some of his pint.

“The poor little orphan,” the blonde man said sarcastically causing Harry to snort, 

“Here we go, back to the dead parents card are we?” he asked.

“Somethings never change,” Draco shrugged, the green eyed man's eyes flickered with a new light in them that had not been there for a long time. 

“I’m working on it, I am waiting on a few calls back one in two days and one next week.”

“But you don’t have until next week,” he bit his lip,

“I know, but thankfully I am prepared for this, life experience or whatever. My mother and father being who they were, what I was forced into. Yes, my mother was and remains a fusspot over me. I suppose in a different way this is. He lets him do whatever he likes to treat people; however, it doesn't matter as long as he is ok.” Draco let out a breath, “Mine did what she could to prepare me and keep me safe, unable to stop the inevitable, gave me the tools if you like. Suppose against her will she raised a soldier,” 

“Yes, exactly a soldier, not a bitch,” Harry grinned. 

“Did you just call-”

“I said what I said,” he winked as he gathered up his long tangled, horrendously messy hair into a bun. Draco all but melted, 

“The first few days after the note, I was a little frightened with the fact he had a lot of messages from me the day before and day of the emotional houdini act. Where I was acting like a cunt,” 

“You? Really?” Harry teased, 

“Suck my dick,” he narrowed his grey eyes, the brown skinned man smiled suggestively, 

“I mean if you would like,” 

“Hush now, Potter!” Draco scoffed, his pale cheeks tinged with red as he slapped Harry on the shoulder, “My point being, I was pushed to breaking point and behaved as such my anger towards the person who was causing my suffering. It felt justified and it was like word vomit, he knows this happens, he is aware people use stuff like this for the kind of target I am, I believe he is using them to justify his wrong doings.” he shook his head, “Walked into a trap. He was being so nice back all for show to show the messages, I wonder will he show all the ones from the weeks and months leading up to that where I begged him to do right he promised not to do a certain thing and would do it hours later or a day later, would he ever show that?” he asked.  “Anyway in conclusion I said what I said,” Draco grinned unapologetically

“Would he show the toxic behaviours leading up to you flipping out?Course not, cowardly trying to save his own skin. A person who is trying better themselves would own up to and clearly you two shouldn’t be friends or anything other but you know. That was sort of a Wormtail way to go about things wasn’t it?” he raised a thick black eyebrow, 

“Oh god, I hated him.” Draco tutted. “I suppose you have a lot more reason to, but I must throw in that being subjected to being around the spineless idiot was unbearable. I wasn’t exactly very brave then.”

“You played the game, you were surviving. Protecting your family, I don’t know if I would have done any different in your position and that scares me. I wouldn’t have wanted to- look the point is you were brave but in a Slytherin way, yeah?” Harry shrugged, 

“Oh here we go, you remain to this utterly Gryffindor,”

“Through and through,” Harry smiled, gulping down the pint. “Fuck it lets have another few here then go clubbing. I will pay you need the money for moving out and seeing you Son,” 

“Potter, I do not wish-”

“Please,” he flashed those damned green eyes at him, it was all over from there. Just before ten pm Draco had found himself entering a muggle club with Harry Potter. Eleven year old him would never believe it and as much as he hates to admit it, he would be a smug little shit about it. 

‘

Pretty green eyes, so full of sparkle and such light. Let me remind you chose not to cry. It's all right for your lover has come home by your side. I'll always stay. Never have to be alone’

Draco almost vomited at the song that was playing. Harry pulled him by the hand, he resisted not wanting to hold hands with Potter but as the song said he had pretty green eyes and unfortunately for Draco they were very persuasive. So, Draco walked to get another drink with Harry with their hands intertwined, yes 1991 Draco would be very smug right now. Draco met Harry whilst trying on robes, and his heart went ‘hello’ while the soul within him, that was him really said, ‘it’s you again, welcome back. I’m so glad to see you’   but it seemed Harry’s soul didn’t recognise his soul as Draco’s did him. Draco is fully convinced that they are stardust, ethereal beings travelling through the galaxy in multiple different ‘meat-suits’ experiencing all walks of life in different times. He thinks he meets Harry Potter in every one. 

‘You drive me crazy, I just can't sleep. I'm so excited, I'm in too deep. Whoa oh oh, crazy, but it feels alright. Baby, thinking of you keeps me up all night’

There was nothing quite like dancing to Britney Spears to make one feel better, the fact that Harry Potter was grinding on his ass while they danced to it was more comical to Draco than anything. Draco had not wanted to do shots, they were a terrible idea, Potter wanted though so Draco took two, he hates the power that man has over him. He wants to run from it. Falling into old patterns is not something Draco wishes for. 

“You have my heart and we'll never be worlds apart. Maybe in magazines but you'll still be my star,” Harry crooned the lyrics of Rihanna’s song which played next into Draco’s ear. The idiot Draco hated him, he hated Harry Potter and the things in which the man was capable of doing to his nervous system. An hour later he was finding it very hard to resist the fact Harry looked as though he were about to kiss him when they were in a shared bathroom stall together, which was for convenience? Right? 

“Yes, so fuck Draco onwards and upwards,” came a all too familiar voice. Draco bit down on his lip and Harry froze, “It's pathetic he keeps trying to send me messages on what used to be our shared music site on the home computer, begging about to give him more time to get out with the cats. I am not stupid, I know what he is after,” Draco put his fist in his mouth and bit down, from sheer anger. His ego was too much even for Draco, can’t he see that Draco always said about separating if it can’t improve? That Draco craved peace, needing to heal more. Needing time to become who he was supposed to be!

“Do not give in! You know his game, he’s a sly bastard and fucking nuts, Bedlam couldn’t fix the shit going on in that crazy bastard’s head.” his friend Lucas chuckled. Draco tried not to laugh, a vain was popping out on Potter’s neck, of course indicating how angry he was and the blonde man found himself momentarily distracted by the urge to lick it. 

“I know, it’s all a bit pathetic ‘Please my cats’ whiny prat,” the man he once knew chuckled, but Draco remembered when those cats were that man's best friend, when the friend he was with now did not bother with him. When all he had was the cat's cuddles and the back and forth banter with Draco, his friends and whoever he gets with next can keep this new version of him. The blonde wants nothing to do with who he has become, they are all welcome to him - the past version of him will always be exclusively Draco’s and he can remember him fondly and still let him go and move past it. 

“Don’t give in, fuck him but not literally.”

“Wouldn’t go there again. Especially now I have Addison back on the hook, any day now!” he could practically hear the wink, “She’ll break up with that girl she’s been occupying herself with, eating out of the palm of my hand. The best part is that stuck up cunt Pansy wrote to Addison to ask if any signs of abuse when she and I were together, but Addison was more locked on the fact that I was now single than the fact that Pansy was saying what I had done to Draco,” the two friends laughed. Now it was Harry biting down on his hand and Draco let his go, “Bet he’ll be miserable once he knows his pet bitch drove her back into my arms,” the cockiness bounced off him as he as his friends laughed. After a bunch of sniffing sounds they left the bathroom, 

“For what it’s worth anyone who runs back to someone they had not spoken to in over a decade because she found out he was single due to abusing his ex. Is not a good person,” Harry was shaking, “Not the kind of person you are on the road to becoming, it’s not something that is behind that prat yet he is still in the middle of doing it, she can’t forgive who he was because he is still actively doing it. No growth, no change,” Harry whispered hurried, 

“I can’t say I relate to the desperation,” Draco jokes, “But with what you just described, she still isn’t the villain in my story, she is the villain in her own. I want him to move on no matter who it is with, and hey the girl she is currently with she asked her out on the date of me and his two year anniversary I don’t think he ever left her mind. I think it might be better suited, she lives a bit way and gives him freedom, she has exactly the look he wants. From what he saif before she’s easier to mould too, and running back so quick I am going to take an educated guess that that still holds up. Even if he stopped the mistreatment, I could never have been happy with who he is now, I don’t want to mould myself into something. He hates how I look now, he likes the more clean cut look that I used to go for. I want to grow and evolve and I’d rather my life as my own to belong to me than to shrink myself to fit his box.” 

“That was um strangely mature,” Harry said, 

“I think I am actually finally free,” Draco laughed happily and Harry darted forward and kissed his cheek. “I have a bit to go till I reach the shore, but I’m closer than I have been the past year,” he said aloud to himself while Harry kissed every part of his face except for his lips. 

Draco’s cottage - 23rd May 2008 - 2pm

“PAPA! I read a book about constellations. Did you know we are in the sky?” Scorpius asked as he ran at Draco who high fived him as soon as we got up, 

“Up there?” he asked, pointing upwards.

“Yes! I can teach you all about them,” he promised, Draco repressed a laugh and decided not to tell him he already knew about them. He liked to encourage his son to thrive, Scorpius really enjoys learning and is at the age he likes ‘showing’ he knows how much of a kick his son would get from explaining the stars to Draco. Scorpiusthen lowered his voice, “But I don’t want to go in there, please can we go to the cafe,” 

“It is just me and cats, he moved out,” Draco assured him and Scorpius’ face lit up, “And I would be very pleased if you would teach me all about the Constellations,”

“Really! Forever? It’s just you going to stay there now forever with the cats? Learning about space with me?” 

“Well I have decided to move out, I think it’s time for somewhere new don’t you think? You can help pick the furniture, you have the best eye for it after all.” Draco smiled obviously not going to unload on a seven year Scorpius the realities of the situation. Scorpius waved to his grandma and then took Draco by the hand and went inside. 

“SCARHEAD!” he shouted and Scarhead ran away while Weaslebe approached him and Well born lay sleeping. “I missed the kitties so much papa,” he flapped his hand while kissing Weaslebe's head, who looked only mildly offended. “Were you ever so happy when he moved away,” he asked 

“I cried a bit but then I was ok. I am happy, yes. I am excited to start having you over again. We can do our fun sleepovers when I move.” Draco promised, 

“Why would you ever cry over him moving out? I wouldn’t have,” Scorpius said bluntly and wrinkled his nose. Draco couldn’t help but laugh at his son’s bluntness not feeling the need to correct it, as Scarhead peered his head around the corner looking in the room as if deciding whether to come in or not. 

“Come on you, it’s ok now, it’s only Scorpius. He is loud but he is kind,”

“Doesn’t scarhead like the loudness,” 

“No, Scarhead is afraid of loud noises,” 

“I’ll be quiet for him, so that he will feel safe” Scorpius whispered. Draco’s heart instantly warmed - he only had a day left until he had to leave the cottage, Pansy is to ring him later about the cats and where the will go, she also has to tell him what happened when she met up with Longbottom. Times are hard and confusing for both of them right now, but it's gotta get easier somehow.

Chapter Text

The rented shed - 24th of May 2008 - 11am 

“Here you go then,” Harry smiled, placing down the cat carrier that, well born was placed in, who was meowing like crazy. Weaselbe was with Pansy and Hermione Granger decided to temporarily foster well born. She told Draco she was thinking of getting another cat and therefore it would be sensible to test out how that would fit into her life and busy schedule. So, Draco obliged. In the end he never accepted for the month's rent of a room but two weeks in a converted shed. Which was like a tiny slice of heaven, he and Scarhead would do alright here. It bought him more time to flat hunt, and also gave him and his cat a well needed break from the hardships he had been facing. 

“We should let him out now, give him a sense of the area,” Draco cleared his throat, Harry smiled and let the cat out of the carrier, scarhead was only too happy but wandered out rather slowly and began sniffing around him, 

“He’s a lovely little thing,” Harry smiled. 

“He is a mischievous little bastard,” Draco returned the smile. 

“So, what now?” Harry said falling to the bed, Draco raised his eyebrow and the black haired man laughed and pulled him down, “Can we stay like this for a while?” he said, wrapping his arms around the blonde who hummed in satisfaction thinking can we stay like this forever? He felt safe for this first time in a long time, “I am sorry you know, that I didn’t drop everything to help you after the war,” Harry yawned, 

“No need to be sorry, Potter,” Draco kissed Harry’s cheek. “You hardly knew me then, sure we went to school and argued like a pair of too proud hippogriffs unable to yield to the other but you didn’t know me then,”

“I do now, sort of. Or I am starting to and I like it,” His green eyes lit up, 

“I merely tolerate your existence, but you helped me pack up the flat, so I suppose you deserve a cuddle,” Draco rolled his eyes. 

“I will always help you know,” he kissed the pale man's jaw, “Just whatever happens that is not going to go away,” he said, kissing down his neck, “Neither is how I feel.” he whispered in his ear. Draco groaned, unable to go there,

“Hush Potter!” The blonde man snapped, Harry started chucking and settled into the crook of his neck to nap. They would wake up later and sort of groceries, he had the one thing he needed which of course was more time. 

Draco’s birthday dinner 5th June 2008 - 5pm

“Sorry, I am late darling,” Pansy waddled, yes quite literally waddled in and sat down quite out of breath, “You are looking much better,” she smiled. He did feel like he was starting to look like someone he recognised again, Pansy also started to get a glow about her. She and Neville finally discussed the pregnancy. Neville told her he did not wish for children, he does not think he shall ever have children. He has also fallen in love with Hannah Abbott, which she could have guessed for herself. She also confessed she does not want children, in the end they both concluded that should the baby ever want to know his biological father, Neville will be happy for him to know. He does not wish for a part in raising the kid.

Pansy has it settled once the baby is born George and Blaise will raise him, who have gotten engaged, Pansy however wants a more active role in the babies life. She is open to nights over with the baby but definitely wants to see him regularly. In her opinion she is too selfish and enjoys her own life-style so much that she wouldn’t be good at full time mothering. The baby will call her aunt Pansy but will know he came from her tummy. She is happy with the outcome and Draco supports her. 

“Cannot believe Longbottom knocked you up,” Theo Nott rolled his eyes in disgust. Blaise hit him round the side of the head which caused Draco to snort. Twenty eight doesn't feel much different to twenty seven or even maybe twenty five. All their lives have changed and the world around them but as the four of them sit waiting on their meal he realises some things do stay the same. 

He thinks for a moment about Astoria, she is his favourite and most painful memories. A constant reminder of a light that searched for him when he was in the dark. Wherever she is he hopes she’s happy. She deserves it, when their souls finally meet again maybe Draco will finally feel at peace. He knows if that reunion happens sooner rather than later, she will kick his arse around the entire after-life. He has their son to look after, he needs to try and survive, he can’t fail him nor her. 

“I love you all,” Draco said begrudgingly and on cue the other three started hurling insults at him and making fun of him. He hadn’t long left now in the shed which had been a dream come true, he had a morning routine of studying and staying up to date for September. He applied for jobs in the afternoon and had attended two interviews already. He watched one movie a night and sometimes called Potter on the phone. He hugged his cat and sang to him and remembered all this was not only for himself to better himself but for his son and his three furry friends. It did feel like somewhat of a break just having the one to run after he felt very settled and content and no matter what was to come after he is glad he got this time in the little shed with Scarhead. 

“What have I missed?” Harry walked in grinning.

Outside Gregory Goyle’s flat 9th June 2008 - 11pm

Draco took a breath when he got outside of Goyle’s flat. He hardly sees him anymore, since Crabbe died in the battle of Hogwarts, it has not been the same for the two of them. They are sort of the people who stay friends because they have known each other a long time and there is a lot of care still there though they have nothing in common. Goyle holds the views that Draco would have grown up with, but as he has grown, grown away from. Gregory Goyle however has become more bitter and twisted as the years go on. 

He sometimes wonders who they would be had Voldemort never existed, or had he been defeated in the first war, another version of them in another universe might be very different but in this one he has to take a breath and say ‘never again’

His healing journey is starting to feel like the first one, he is no longer willing to tolerate certain behaviours. He doesn’t like what he saw when staying there, he saw Stephen in goyle and what was worse he saw his past self in him too. Draco sees what he could potentially become if he doesn’t work on himself, if he isn’t strict with himself. He has a lot to overcome, more than what he thought he did. He thought he was a lot further on in the healing process than what he truly was, he realises now he isn’t even half way there. He is riding the waves, because he can’t control them, one day he will be able to reach the shore. Until then he is just going to have to try and stay afloat. With a moment of guilt he apparates to Pansy’s flat.

New Year’s Eve 1999 - Paris - 11.50pm

“You have been avoiding me all night,” Astoria tapped Draco on the shoulder, she wasn’t feeling the best. Her sickness worsened, she could almost smell death and there was nothing she could do to stop it, it turns out she was two months Pregnant. She was thrilled to be bringing in new life as death awaited for her. She never felt love like this, she almost cried when she realised her stomach was slightly swelling, bloating everyone said because of the stage of the pregnancy she was in. Yet she couldn’t help but smile anyway, she was bloated because she was pregnant, therefore her stomach was swelling due to the baby. 

“I have not,” Draco snapped playfully, smiling at her. His eyes had previously been focused elsewhere she sighed, she knew he wasn’t going to run off with her. He was going to go to him of course he was. He had no idea she was carrying his child and she had no idea how to tell him. She knew what they were, a summer fling which bled into September and October because they enjoyed each other's company and cared about each other too much to stop. 

She pulled the plug on it at the end, she knew they had been prolonging the inevitable, she loves him but he is not hers. 

Will she die with a broken heart? Once it’s stopped beating is it still broken? She has many questions and there are no answers, but whatever happens she knows the baby is in safe hands with Draco, he is going to love this little boy as much as she does. She just hopes she is around long enough to see some of it. She is carrying a baby which is half her and half of the love of short life’s, smiling at him because she knows it and he is sipping whiskey and staring across the room at someone else, potentially the love of his, because he doesn't know a damn thing. 

Life can be cruel, so can the world. She only hopes her son learns to dance through his storms and hopes Draco can show him a positive outlook on life. She wants him to thrive, know the world is at his feet, make his life his own. She feels hers only began to belong to her after the war. Then it didn’t start to belong to Draco Malfoy, because she lived and breathed for him, but he did not return that.

“Do you remember Italy,” she whispered, if she has the dates right (which she does) they conceived their little bundle under the stars there, 

“I do, that was a wonderful experience.” a familiar smile played on his lips, “So were you,” he whispered lowly, 

“It was everything,” she nodded ‘You were everything’ she thought. 

“Kiss me at midnight?” He asked, and she nodded one last time she wanted them to belong to each other. The rest she would face after. 

London Zoo, July 15th 2008 - 8pm 

“I really get to see the stars in the zoo?” Scorpius asked, 

“And the animals!” Draco promised. 

“The stars too though?” he pressed, 

“Of course, my little starboy,” he patted his head, 

“I am your star? Aren’t I a constellation?” Scorpius wrinkled his nose, 

“You can be anything you want but are the whole damn constellation indeed,” Draco took his son by the hand and started walking him around the place with a smile. “We’ll see Lions and snakes and everything in between,” he told Scorpius happily, who was much more excited about the ice-cream van in front of them, and started tugging on his jeans pocket. “Yes, let's go get a big cone of Ice-cream and some juice!” Draco chuckled, seeing his son’s face light up in a smile both mended and broke his heart simultaneously. He was happy when Scorpius was happy, but that smile made him think of her .

Chapter Text

Draco’s new home - End of July 2008 - 3pm 

So Draco tried and moved about but did not give up. The blood sweat and tears he poured into the relationship he diverted his energies into finding somewhere. He never gave up and got through to the end.Yet Draco was still to reach the shore, his cats still temporarily fostered while he signed a six month lease in student housing to continue his journey on becoming a muggle healer of sorts. This gave him a lot more time to secure somewhere that does allow his cats, he knows he can do it he’s determinant, 

“Here it is, the last of your stuff,” Harry said, wearing the grin that Draco fell in love with. “Where should I chuck it?”

“Over there,” Draco responded, but in reality that is just where Draco himself placed it, as Harry was not there in the room with him. He had not been in his presence in over 2 months, he was simply haunted by the ghosts of what was. He was very much in love with someone he believed to not exist anymore, who Harry became towards the end of their relationship was someone unrecognisable. Draco couldn’t distinguish the Harry he had been with for nearly eight years to the man that had him fearful at the end, so he referred to that man in his head as Stephen or Stephan. It really didn’t matter he couldn’t keep up because that was not the man he loved. He felt like that man belonged in the past only. Draco just imagined Harry around to be able to cope with what had happened. 

As he sits now in his brand new room, the survival mode fades away and reality kicks in. 

‘This is Athur Weasley,  - I must inform you Harry has moved home, back with Molly and I until he can sort something for himself, you have twelve days to vacate the property.’

Is what the note really said, putting what had gone on between himself and Harry aside he couldn’t believe what he was saying. He never knew Harry to be a coward, he was brave and kind, yes he had the worst temper Draco had ever seen but Draco himself was not perfect nor claimed to be. The two of them were one conversation away from either fixing everything or parting ways forever but in a manner which allows Draco and the cats enough time to get away safely. 

In the weeks leading up to the note Draco had asked Harry to move out, the cats were becoming fearful from their arguments, Scorpius who once adored Harry wanted to be nowhere near him. Draco had reached his breaking point. Harry however was travelling down once a week to see Draco and the two had managed to start rekindling what once was, which was not the same as it had been when they were good. Harry believed it would never come back and began lashing out over BBM, Draco believed of course they could get it back but it was going to take some bloody work! He wouldn’t fight for love if Harry wouldn’t meet him halfway. Harry for the first time acted like a coward and left Draco without an explanation, just a note from Arthur Weasley. 

Drarry text messages - 2004

Harry (daddy): Please Draco, come back in the room <3 I miss you, you brat.

Draco (brat): No, this is going too far. I fear we are prolonging the inevitable. If we don’t end it now we shall end up in a toxic relationship. I love you but I am fucking it up and you will hate me. 

Harry (daddy): Oh piss off with that. This is how we are, we fight. You huff. We cuddle, we fuck were ok! It’ll always be you, you twat. I’ll never not love you, I’ll never not crave your presence. It will be you always. Only you darling :( don’t make me have to walk this earth knowing I lost you, no one else could come close. What we have is what everyone on the planet wants, muggle or wizard. This is it baby, don’t throw us away. 

Draco (brat): I love you. I do … 

Harry (daddy): then come on it, love. Always you Draco until the end my heart is yours. 

Draco (brat): ew. Fine coming in. 

Present day 2008.

Draco wonders if Harry knows the fights escalated more because instead of being nice and talking him round that way he chose to shout and get angry making Draco less willing to run back and fix things like he had done. He missed how he used to treat him, that was the key difference in their dynamic. It was as though Harry just knew how much Draco loved him and how he never left no matter what they went through, no matter what life threw at them they powered on. Draco by his side, what he failed to remember is he told Harry that the way in which he responded to things was dependent on how Harry was treating him. When Harry was loving, he wanted to solve any problem. He forgave any behaviour without a second thought knowing his partner was human and not a robot he could mess up and Draco would still be there. It was the mistreatment that changed how Draco responded, what took away from what Draco was willing to give. 

Pansy had given birth the week before, a beautiful little boy. Draco was with her in the delivery room, held her hand the whole way and she stayed with George and Blaise for the entire week after, she is set to go home in the next few days and have some winding down time, she’ll have the baby overnight just three days later. Draco is proud of her; she is the best ‘aunt’ that baby could hope for. He sees the love she has for little Freddie. 

He likes to think about those types of things and not things like his phone call with arselick aka the weasleyette. Who had barley contacted Harry in his time with Draco, 

“Hello,” Draco said when arse lick answered the phone, 

“Hi Draco, what is the matter?” Ginny said in a condescending voice, 

“It is just Harry has-”

“He wishes no contact with you, if you try and contact him whether that be via a friend such as myself or show up at it my parent’s house it can be viewed as harassment,” Ginny breathed, she was never any good with phone calls did not find them as amusing as Ronald did, but she kept one on her as all the weasley’s did when Harry pulled away from wizarding world. 

“I am not looking to rekindle the relationship by any mean,” Draco confirmed slowly, “I was the one to suggest several times it should end, the thing is-”

“I cannot pass along any information, It is Harry’s wish that he breaks the cycle,” Ginny cut across. Draco tried to calm himself, ‘breaking the cycle’ was a term Draco learned from a book he read, about a situation similar to what he was facing within his relationship to him. There was once a time where His former boyfriend would hang on to every word he said, remembering every detail in a way of adoration but time brought change and by the end Harry used to relish in using Draco’s own words to hurt him, while he agreed the cycle needed to be broken, he feels it could have broken without him having little to no time to relocate himself and the cats. 

By the end of their phone and then message exchange, Draco lost his temper and ended up leaving himself looking like the villain. Something he promised himself he would no longer allow to let happen. He was angry that they had gotten into arrears and he hadn’t come to Draco about it but was happy to let Draco treat them both to dates. Harry took over the lease of the cottage and paid the first 6 years outright. They had plans to buy it, but with too much given to charity and rebuilding and families who lost in the war and a few bad investments, over the years the fortune Harry acquired dwindled. Draco often wondered where it went, it was not as if lavish holidays were taken, they went away once a year, very sensible, and Harry wasn’t one for buying loads of stuff for himself. He went a bit overboard with Draco’s presents but surely he did not leave them this broke. They could have overcome it either way, they could have overcome anything.

He knew that from the moment he reunited with him drunk in a bar, which was the year 2000 not 2008 at all

“Alright, ferret face,” Harry said casually grinning cheekily at Draco, who had grown up just as well as Harry often imagined, if not somewhat better. Fully grown into his features that were still rather pointy, he likely looked like a fallen angel who also happened to have his septum pierced. Sleeves rolled up, the start of him getting his tattoo’s, the faded dark mark had been decorated with flowers and he had a lot of random ones around it and on his other arm. Harry had told him years later  how his mouth felt dry when he looked at him,

“Ah scarhead, fancy meeting the chosen one here,” Draco raised his eyebrow.

“Probably not that surprising,” Harry rolled his eyes, the prophet had a field day with the fact Harry had been seen snogging another bloke, Draco just had not seen it.

“Suppose you never could stop oogling me while we were at school,” Draco teased, standing up to thank the bar man for his own double firewhiskey. As Harry accepted his own and then paid Jack for both he noticed Draco also had his bellybutton pierced, Harry told him how he almost came then and there. 

“Ch-cheers Jack,” his bright green eyes glued to the jewellery hanging off Draco’s navel,

“Old habits certainly do die hard.” Draco’s voice is full of the same arrogance from their school days. Fuck it, Harry later told him didn’t mind, he was weirdly pleased to hear it. Maybe not so weirdly as the first time he discovered the art of self pleasure it had been after an argument with Draco. 

“Something like that, what brings you here then, Malfoy? Except the obvious,” Harry muttered, not really wanting to discuss blokes with Draco. 

“You mean in Cornwall?” he asked, Harry nodded, taking a sip. “I live here Potter, or rather trying to acquire somewhere to live here. You?” 

“Oh right, I just like moving around exploring bars and that since I gave up being an Aurror of course,” Harry scratched the back of his neck,

“Really? You gave up the heroics?” Draco asked, Harry furrowed his brows. After the war Draco lived with Andromeda and so did his mother but he wasn’t sure what Harry had been up to. Though he had caught glimpses of him often when he was visiting Teddy. The blonde man used to make himself scarce his mother too, later on Harry would confess how he always wanted to ask about Draco; the desire burned him up every time he caught a glimpse of him. Harry spoke in Narcissa and Draco’s favour during the trial. In the end they were free, Luicius got a few short years in Azkaban and Malfoy Manor was seized.

“Not a fan of the prophet anymore are you not?” Harry teased, 

“Nope this is the first time I step foot into a wizarding location by choice for these last eight months,” Draco admitted. 

 “Hang on, he’s around seven months right? He’ll be eight months soon,Your son I mean?” Harry blabbered out.

Crazy how ‘your son’ became ‘our son’ and then ‘our son’ went back to ‘your son’ before the relationship even ended. Before Scorpius stopped wanting to be around Harry altogether. He then began to tell Harry about a nasty relationship he got into after Scorpius was born when i was deep in grief about Astoria, it was all so raw back then he was so vulnerable. He would break down about Astoria anywhere he went, he opened himself up to be taken advantage of.

“Stay with me,” Harry blurted out as Draco laughed looking into his eyes causing him to shiver, 

“Have you lost your mind?”

“Look, I haven’t gone mental. Well, completely mental, but you know I have space, so if only until you find somewhere else!” Harry tried, “But I quite like it here, maybe we could move.. Or not,”

“No,” Draco shook his head, “I need to take responsibility. I stayed too long when the repeated behaviours, I also jumped into that relationship in the first place,”

“You aren’t responsible for his behaviour, you did what you could, you kept your son away. Did not introduce them, which is a plus and yeah you stayed longer than you should have but you have just told me that was to prevent exactly what happened. Seems to me the bastard saw you were vulnerable and he took advantage.” Harry shrugged, “You are not responsible for his behaviour,” he repeated.

“But I am for finding myself a new place to stay.” he looked down at his firewhiskey glass, 

“Yes, but you have been given a ridiculously short time for that and yeah you have Andy’s to crash at but it’s getting crowded. So, stay with me, yeah? Gives you more time at least.” Harry cleared his throat.

“I need to try to stand on my own two feet, for the second time in my life I need to learn again and rebuild from scratch.” the blonde man said grey eyes pouring into emerald ones, 

“Right, well if at the end of ten days, yeah? OWL me or something if you need help steadying your legs before you are able to stand on them yourself.” 

“Oh god listen to you, Potter,” Draco snorted and the other man punched him lightly, “You sound fucking stupid,” 

“Oi,” The messy haired man flicked Draco’s pretty (in Harry’s opinion)nose. 

“You do, listen to you trying to come up with those myspace/tumblr quotes,”

“Er, what sorry?” he pushed his own glasses up his face. 

“What are you going to come out with next ‘Alice had to fall before she got to wonderland’ or something?” Draco raised an eyebrow.

“No.” Harry scoffed, “You seem fond enough with these spacey tumbling quotes. Look at your rhyming them off,” 

“I said one Potter,” Draco retorted, Harry just gave him a look and they argued for the next hour. Slept together that night and began seeing each other; they moved into the cottage not even a year later. 

The reality of what had happened was very different to what Draco had been pretending in his head to cope with, for Harry did not go to Pansy’s flat in search of him. That is what the old Harry would have done. He would have stopped at nothing until he found Draco, that was kind of their thing he usually managed to just find Draco even when it seemed impossible. Draco often played out if this had been someone else who did it to him, what Harry as he knew would do. That man would have stopped at nothing but the reality is that man isn’t coming to save Draco anymore, he doesn’t exist. Gone extinct if you will, the past is already gone, whether he likes it or not he has to accept it. He cannot stay there anymore. 

The mother who was mollycoddling ‘Stephan’ was quite literally Molly Weasley. She doted over Harry too much, she doesn’t challenge his bad behaviours like she would her biological children. This is understandable seeing as Harry had been through so much but there is a line and she crossed it so far that she ended up damaging his adult self, Harry feels absolved of guilt and has no pressure to take responsibility and Molly will mollycoddle him every step of the way. 

In truth the reason Pansy reached out to Neville is because of Harry, but not in the way Draco’s daydream played out. The real reason was that Pansy saw how cowardly it was for Harry to not speak directly to the man he was supposed to marry and end things or try to fix them because anyone around them could see it was not just Draco hanging on, Harry left claw marks trying to hold on too. One adult conversation away from coming to a conclusion, Draco was sure of this no matter how uncomfortable it was.

So, due to that Pansy did not wish to act the way Harry had and that is the very reason she decided to tell Neville she was pregnant with his child. Neville and Hannah did come and see Freddie two days after he was born. Draco thinks they will be alright, they all will. Freddie is so loved he has George, Blaise, Pansy, Hanna, Neville and if he has Draco too if he was honest. 

The text messages leading up to him finding Arthurs note would haunt him. In a fit of distress he told Harry if someone else asked him out he would say yes, and in truth he would not have. Though Draco does now realise why that may have caused Harry to go ghost. Harry was so jealous anytime someone looked at Draco when they were out he would go crazy maybe not to the person but inwards. His face said it all. He never needed to worry though, Draco only had eyes for him when he was eleven. Always his until the end. Even now as he sits in his new home, cursing time, cursing change, cursing Harry and cursing himself. Harry told him to move on and anytime he tried Harry would threaten to kill the person, he saved the world for his loved ones but he would burn it all to the ground in an instant for Draco. Harry was not just jealous he was possessive, Draco was his, he did not mind that as Harry was his too. It seemed like nothing could break them, except of course each other, because that was it in the end wasn’t it Draco let out a sigh. 

Pansy scolded him for rereading the chats, the worst thing is afterwards she brought Harry up and said wouldn’t he look after the cats since he was the other person responsible for them, even if only temporarily. Draco cried, he couldn't, she must have known he couldn’t. Harry pulled away contact, he no longer could rely on him and even if he could the cats were scared around him and a lot more settled after he left, he could not do that to his animals. 

The night in the club where ‘Pretty green eyes’ played as the two men entered happened years before, at the start of the two of them hanging out. The whole overhearing about Addison did not happen. Draco fashioned it that in his mind to accept when he was scrolling through MySpace and saw Harry and his ex’s comments laughing with each other and flirting, he knows all too well Harry will go back to the ex for familiarity. Harry hates the fact he has to start over romantically after he and Draco lived and breathed each other for years, knows how hard it is and rare to forge a bond and relationship such as the two men had. However his ex is quite obsessed with him still and he can see it, Harry is about to enter a marriage on convenience, who knows when he’ll wake up regretful. Whenever he doubts Harry will communicate that, the two will probably stay together forever now. Draco is ok with that, it is probably the one person he is ok with Harry moving on with, because he remembers every conversation he and Harry ever had, he wishes he didn’t sometimes but he remembers every moment, all of it. 

Pansy did however write to the ex asking about signs of abuse, but Harry wasn’t like that back then Draco knows that. This is Harry Potter for crying out loud he had just saved the whole world, and gotten involved with this person and for him the fire died out quick but for ‘Addison’ the longing for Harry never left, no Addison isn’t the Weaslette, but the person who Harry shared the first few years after the war with. The name Addison, is what Draco calls the ex in his mind as that was from a TV show he and Harry were growing fond of while Draco studied muggle medicine. It was the name of an ex that one of the characters went back to after the character had cheated. So, Draco found that fitting, the years Harry spent apart from his ex doesn’t erase the cheating. None of what happened was erased, not the fact they could not care for each other properly. Not that anyone was to blame there Harry was very unwell back then, the PTSD from it all, the grief still raw in his chest. It was being with Draco they both pushed each other to do better, suppose now they could set each other free. The horrible way in which ‘Stephen/Stephan’ bragged about was merely how Draco would imagine it in his mind.

The way Harry acted towards the end, Draco can never put that in his mind as Harry, the man he knew at school, the man who he grew to love after. He cannot connect who he was in the last part of the relationship to who he had known since eleven. For his own sanity he’ll probably keep them separate for all time. Harry will either find his way back to himself now, go on and be brilliant again, he’ll hang out with Ron and Hermione who didn’t approve of his relationship with Draco and he’ll feel like Harry again. 

Draco has gone through enough to just want peace, to let it all fade. Every other version of Draco from age eleven to twenty seven would be screaming at him, he doesn’t like to think what Harry would think of what became of them, the one who was willing to risk everything to just hold Draco. 

In the end they wrecked it between themselves, outside forces were giving too much stock in their relationship too neither cared what anyone else had to say about it until last year. Draco was maybe burned out, Harry maybe wanted more out of life than what Draco could give him. Whatever way it's looked at, other people's opinions never could make a dent in it before, for some reason they both allowed it to in the end. 

Was Draco owed some bad karma and paid it in full? Was Harry finding it too easy to be on the path from the abused becoming the abuser and unable to face his problems? Draco suggested the healers or a muggle doctor/therapist multiple times and Harry would be enraged. 

It hurts when he sees old photos of Harry cuddling with the cats who were only too happy to be around him back then, it hurts when he sees an old photo of Scorpius looking at Harry like he reason the sun shone. When did it change? What happened? Were old wounds never truly treated, they may have found escapism in each other. For the most part they did push the other to do better, when did that stop? Why wasn’t this caught sooner. Draco can’t change the past and even if he could he would only travel back to the moment he thought it was not fixable and end it then instead of letting it fester, they both could have gotten away safely and happily then. 

Of course Harry was not in the shed with Draco, Draco was reading a book Harry filled in for valentines ‘I wish had dropped everything to save you after the war’ who was going to tell 2005 Harry that in a few years he would leave him in the exact position he wished he could save him from. He also did not turn up late to the blonde’s birthday meal, he didn’t come at all, Draco’s mind only wandered to imagine Harry coming in. 

At Goyle’s flat when he was still homeless and moving about he was in a very unique position where he saw Harry in Goyle and not Harry, Harry but who he became in the end which is why Draco removed himself. The thing that made it unique is Draco also saw his own behaviours, Goyle not listening to reason and coming up with his own conclusion and not allowing Draco to converse with him. Draco was like that in the last few months, Harry had been so horrible leading up to it that Draco refused communication and would make his own mind up. Now seeing that he can see how it could never have been fixed whether he wanted to or not, Harry was not the only one who had to change. 

“Goyle said I trigger people to abuse me that’s why Potter-,” Draco explained to Pansy, 

“You can not trigger someone to abuse anyone,” Pansy held her hand up. “You also are downplaying a lot of what went on between you and Potter. You aren’t perfect Draco I could have told you that a long time ago! You are entitled at times, still even now but you are a whole lot better than back then. There are behaviours you still need to correct, outside of your relationship with Harry but I could say that for myself too. Were all learning, you are twenty eight you are grown up but you still have so much to learn,”

“Just why did he have to be a lesson,”

He had so many lessons, appreciate everyone because time is limited, no one has a guaranteed number of years on this earth. Astoria had been dying for years but she was more alive than anyone he knew. Instead of having fun with her on New Years Eve which would be the last one she was alive for, he was staring at Harry. He thinks of her every fucking day. The day he moved into the house he had been begging her in his mind for help, trying to talk to her from beyond the grave hoping she could hear him. Harry once told him about how his mother said she never left him when he met her via the resurrection stone, so maybe Astoria never felt Draco either. 

The man who gave him the key was talking to a woman and asked her name as Draco walked down the street to buy supplies after checking the key worked and paid the deposit she answered ‘Astoria’ now while Draco knows that was not the Astoria he knew, he feels the timing was divine where the woman said her name at that moment, a little way for the universe to tell him, Astoria is looking out for you and for Scorpius, she is helping. 

“Don’t you remember you beat me up whilst at school?” 2003 Draco said to Harry, 

“Oh piss off with that! You bring that up every time we have a disagreement,” 2003 Harry nipped Draco’s thigh.

“And not even on your own, you gathered help from George,” he raised a pale blonde eye brow, 

“Stuff it!” 

“Can we just have take out please, I shall not bring up your unruly behaviour for another three days,” 

“You can have anything you like you brat,” Harry rolled his eyes, “Anything, in my power I can give to you, I will. I want a life for us both you twat, stop looking at me like that. I love you,” he pulled a face, 

“Gross but I love you too obviously,” he told him as he often did, Harry darted forward and pulled him into a kiss, the two men moaning into each other's mouths kissing each other desperately. 

“Mine,” Harry said possessively, 

“Yours, I could never be anyone else's,” Draco whined.

“You are my world, I have no idea how that happened but it did,” 

“My everything,” Draco cooed 

“Sit on my face,” Harry whispered, 

“Fuck sake Potter!”

Draco smiled at the memory “I love you, Harry. The man I once knew, I may not love who you became in the same way I love him but I love you and I let you go,” he said to the empty room.