Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

A rule of thumb for any of you out there who wake up to find yourself suddenly living in an anime: take stock before you panic.

First determine what anime you are in. This is the most important thing because quite frankly there are some anime where, no matter who you are or your role in it may be, you are screwed. I don't know about you but no amount of funny wires that let me run along buildings will make up for the world gone to hell and cannibal giants eating my loved ones (at least that's what I assume Attack on Titan is about, it might be about DC fans trying to get Teen Titans Go canceled for all I know). Now, maybe some of you really want to end up in one of those emo worlds where humanity is doomed and you know that half of the people you meet will be dead before it is done because you want to live out your Hunger Games fantasies... whatever floats your boat. Me? I openly admit I am lazy and would much rather have an easy time of it.

Now, if you are in an anime world that isn't one big giant ball of suck I then suggest determining if you are a main character or just one of those random bystanders that is in the background. It might sound all neat to be in the Yu-Gi-Oh! universe until you realize that you aren’t going to be in the tournaments and instead will be having your soul ripped out by YamI Bakura and then Dartz and the Zorc. Rinse, repeat, cash the friggin' check. I know a lot of people who end up sucked into anime worlds end up with Stands or sailing with Luffy but that's only because everyone who DOESN'T hit the jackpot when it comes to entering a fictional world dies a painful death and doesn't get a chance to share their tale. Or at the very least it doesn't get good reviews.

Finally, check to see if you are yourself. Sometimes you get to keep your body, sometimes you end up as Ash Ketchem. Ketchum. Keechum? Whatever. My point is that matters too because it is going to make things both easier and harder. Yeah, real cool to suddenly be Tai leading the digidestined but then you realize that you lost all the muscle memory you used to have so your desire to punch that monkey radio host in the face is going to end VERY badly. Tai wasn't a runner is all I'm saying. I'm personally glad I was just younger when this all started for me.

But I'm getting slightly ahead of myself.

You need to think these things through before you panic. Because your "magical adventure" (this site needs a button to make clear one is being sarcastic) isn't going to be so awe-inspiring if you spend the entire time locked in a padded room while doctors decide if they should put the straight jacket on you before or after the enema.

Now, I can't claim that I followed these rules when I found myself sucked into my oh so wonderful odyssey. Yeah, I'd like to claim I was all aloof and shit because that would make me sound cool and a badass but I am going to be honest with you all because you guys deserve that... and frankly I figure laughing at me will get me more reviews.

(innocent smile)

My rude awakening started in the passenger seat of a flying car.

“Hey!” a young woman’s voice called out, causing me to start awake, looking about rapidly as I tried to get my bearings. “You’re going to want to get ready because we are almost there!” I frowned, looking about the front of the car we were in, which looked too complex for a normal vehicle but too simple for an airplane. I had the sneaking suspicion that some of the buttons and dials were just for show. Through the windshield all I saw was blue ocean… and a small speck of land in the distance. “So listen, I know my friends are going to seem all exciting and all that but don’t forget that you are here to film me, okay?” She flashed me a charming smile that I had the feeling she spent hours every morning practicing in front of a mirror. “So make sure that drone of yours doesn’t go wandering off.”

“Right…” I said slowly, looking back to see a small blue egg-shaped drone hovering behind me, a pair of spindly arms that were utterly impractical but I just knew would be able to lift up a car sticking out of its sides and a little antenna on the top. In the front and center of it was some glass with a black ‘eye’ with a lilac ‘pupil’. Very much the stereotypical 1980s design for a robot. “Am I good to check on… it?”

“Yeah, sure!” the woman, who I had quickly realized upon truly looking at her was Bulma Briefs from Dragon Ball, said with a grin. Judging by her outfit and age that meant we were at the very beginning of the saga.

‘You’re in Dragon Ball Z,’ I thought to myself, wondering WHY I wasn’t panicking more. I could tell this wasn’t a dream, as too many of my senses were feeding my information for it to be so. Yet the fact that I was in a fictional work wasn’t having me break down into sobs as I rocked back and forth in a corner. ‘Maybe its just the way this world works… or whatever force dragged me kicking and screaming into this place.’ I looked down at my hands, which weren’t shaking in the slightest. Steady as a rock. I knew I should feel anxiety but it was like something had locked those worries away.

Bulma didn’t notice my ponderings and just kept talking. “You don’t need to be strapped in when I’m flying this baby!”

Right on cue a seagull suddenly appeared in front of us and Bulma let out a cry, jerking the steering wheel and causing the flying car to shudder and tremble as it dove down before righting itself.

“Watch where you are flying, you jerk!” Bulma roared, glaring backwards even though we were already nearly a mile past the avian.

Deciding not to say anything lest I get yelled at I undid my buckle and moved to the back of the… well, I could tell it was larger than a car so more like a flying van I supposed… and headed towards the drone that was hovering in the back.

“So… I’m hoping you can talk…”

“I can, sir,” the drone said back with a polite, vaguely British accent. “far more than you can, and in a more dignified way.”

“Awesome.” I already knew I was going to love the little guy. “So let’s pretend I have no idea what is going on.”

“Act like you are an idiot. Understood.”

“I… didn’t word it like that.”

“Act like you are a gigantic clod.”

“Not helping,” I grumbled.

“Act like you are the dumbest sack of meat on this entire planet-“

“I get it!” I snapped. “Now then… doing that… who am I? Who are you? And what are we doing here?”

The drone considered me for a moment. “You are Avo Kayos, documentarian. I am your camera drone, Isco. Together we have produced 6 highly acclaimed movies about famous figures in our world. After our last one, about Gen Veenson of the White Tail Brigade we were hired by Bulma Briefs to create a documentary about her life.”

‘That makes sense,’ I thought to myself. ‘Or at least as much sense as me waking up in the world of Dragon Ball.’ I glanced at my reflection in Isco’s mirrored surface and saw I basically looked the same though younger. Late 20s, most likely. But same blonde hair, same gray-blue eyes, same circle beard. Even my clothing was rather normal, with blue jeans and purple t-shirt with the words KAYOS FILMS printed on it. I wasn’t some strange alien creature or a magical ball of chocolate or anything else that Dragon Ball could have thrown at me. Just a normal human being.

I blinked.

‘Aw fuck I’m a normal human.’

“We’re coming in for a landing!” Bulma called out and I shared a look with Isco before returning quickly to my seat. “So I went over everyone that was going to be here, right?”

“Son Goku, Krillin, Master Roshi,” I said, ticking off the people I remembered arriving for the reunion.

“Right. But remember, I’m the star of this documentary! Goku might be some amazing martial artist but you better remember who is paying you to film all this!” She flashed me a dark look and I quickly nodded; I didn’t think I was ever going to get used to anime women being able to bring the wrath of the gods upon people.

It took only a minute for Bulma to land and once she did she leapt out of the vehicle and onto the sands of Kame House, throwing out her hands and grinning… only for no one to appear.

“Those jerks!” she growled, balling her hands into fists. “They are supposed to come out here and greet me and tell me how wonderful I look…”

“Maybe they are letting you have a dramatic entrance,” I suggested and at once Bulma perked up.

“Right!” she beamed. “That’s perfect!” She hurried to the open door, calling out to Master Roshi and Krillin that she was there while Isco floated over to me.

“…that was an impressive lie, sir.”

“Tell her the truth and she’ll kill us both,” I muttered through clamped together teeth.

“Understod. Wise suggestion.”

“Kayos, come on in!” Bulma called out from Kame House and Isco and I moved to join her inside. Clearly she had been in the middle of a conversation when she’d noticed us lingering as when we entered she was telling the two men, “-with him. He’s more interested in his fangirls than he is for me! Making no time for me at all! So Yamcha and I? We are DONE! This was his last chance… we’re meeting each other after five years and he can’t drag himself away from his adoring public? Well, they can give him all the love because he won’t get any of mine!”

“Oh?” Master Roshi said, looking me up and down when he noticed me. “And is this your new boyfriend?”

“What?” Bulma said, turning to stare at me. “No, of course not! This is just Kayos.”

“Thank you, Bulma, that was very kind to stomp on my worth as a man,” I snarked.

“I didn’t mean it like that!” Bulma exclaimed with a huff. “I know you’re married to your job!” She turned back to her friends. “This is Kayos and Isco. I asked them to film a documentary.”

“All about us?” Krillin said with a grin, stepping forward only for Bulma to push him away.

“All about ME,” Bulma corrected. “They are going to document my life as the world’s smartest woman, premiere inventor, and most eligible bachelorette!”

“And must humble girl on the planet,” Krillin muttered only for Bulma to turn on him and begin to scream at him about how she was ‘as humble as humble pie’.

“So, Bulma told you all about us, right?” Master Roshi asked at the two bickered. While there was a ton of heat to her words I could also tell that it came from a place of love.

“If you mean did she tell me to be glad I have a penis instead of a vagina then yes, she told me all about you.” Roshi started at that while Bulma and Krillin laughed at the old man who said nothing to counter my claim, their earlier fight forgotten instantly. “So, what do you guys have planned for today?” I asked as I began to move around the room, taking on the role of ‘documentarian’ to get them talking. Isco slowly moved around, taking everything in.

Of course the question was meaningless. I already knew that whatever they had planned would get tossed into the garbage can the moment Raditz showed up.

‘That bastard is going to cause a whole lot of problems… almost everything that came after can be tied back to him. I mean, the Androids aren’t truly his fault but with King Cold and Frieza’s DNA Cell wouldn’t have been as much of a probably. Hell, without Vegeta’s DNA…’

I frowned as Bulma and Krillin discussed what beach games they should play and if it was wise to even try with Goku participating.

‘Except… without Namek and all that Goku and Piccolo would be so weak Gero himself probably could defeat him, meaning that we’d get History of Trunks… possibly without Trunks.’ I mentally cursed myself, both for the fact that I was already thinking about changing things to try and protect more people and that I needed certain things to happen to prepare everyone for the threats to come. ‘Hell, Buu is completely unrelated to Raditz so this entire world is fucked if Dobby or Dabby or whatever the fuck his name was returns to bring him back to life with Bobbity.’

It was utterly frustrating. Make a move to try and make things easier and run the risk of making things worse. But there was just as much danger in relying on things to remain the same only for the mere fact that I existed in the world to cause things to radically alter. Chaos Theory was in full force, with my tiny changes causing massive alterations.

“And after that there will be the barbeque,” Krillin continued before looking at Bulma. “You… did remember to bring the food, right?” He paused. “And the barbeque?”

“I have a barbeque!” Roshi complained.

“Ya, if you call that rusted out trash can a barbeque!”

“Of course I brought the food. As if I could rely on you two to get it?” Bulma said. “If it were up to you to all we’d have is jerky and beer!”

“We’d also have some cake,” Krillin protested.

Bulma scoffed at that. “Why do you always expect me to buy the food nowadays anyway?”

“Hey!” Krillin complained. “We haven’t seen you in five years!”

“Because if you had seen me you’d have made me buy all the food!”

Roshi chimed in. “Well, you are far richer than us. I might have a nice place out here but it doesn’t exactly make me a ton of cash. And if I tried to feed Goku I’d have to spend a month fishing!”

“I couldn’t know,” I said casually, “if you set up a few more little islands you could probably make a killing renting them out.”

“Eh?” Roshi said, looking at me. “Make a few more islands?”

“Not that hard for someone of your skill,” Isco commented. “Or, perhaps, it is. You could have lost your touch.”

“Lost my touch!? What are ya gettin’ on about!? I ain’t lost nothing!”

“There is no reason to get upset,” Isco said simply. “It happens to all men as they get older. Unable to stand tall and strong and proud. Rise to the occasion. Be solid. They… droop.”

Roshi’s face turned red with fury. “Why you no good tin plated-“

“I am not tin plated,” Isco stated.

“Not helping,” I muttered.

“…so,” Krillin said slowly, looking at Bulma.

“Yes, I remember the food,” she said, pulling out a case from her pocket. “Along with the barbeque grill. I had to keep them as capsules; like Roshi said if I tried to haul all of Goku’s supply alone I’d have needed to bring a freighter!”

“I hope you have enough,” Krillin said worriedly. “You know how he gets.”

“Don’t worry. So long as we don’t tell him just HOW much food we brought we can tuck away enough for us to have plenty.”

“Maybe distract him so you guys can eat first?” I suggested as Roshi continued to argue with Isco.

“Hey! That’s a great idea!” Bulma snapped her fingers. “Now then, let’s get some of the introductions out of the way that way we can have fun and not worry about needing to be pulled aside.”

“Introductions?” Krillin asked.

“For the documentary. People need to know who everyone is. Oh Isco!” She waved at the drone. “Come over here please!”

“That’s right, run ya sparkin’ egg!” Roshi hollered.

“Thanks for saying please, at least,” I whispered.

“Treat machines with respect, that’s my motto,” Bulma said and I grinned; oh, I could get along with her just fine! “We’re going to film some introductions, okay?” Isco bobbed in what I assumed was a nod and Bulma opened her mouth before I raised my hand to stop her.

“Let me.” I cleared my throat. “Introductions. Bulma.” I pointed at her and she smiled.

“Well, we already did this once but hey, can’t hurt to do it multiple times! Hi!” She waved. “I’m Bulma Briefs, genius inventor and heir to the Capsule Corporation! I don’t mind getting my hands dirty but don’t think that means I can’t clean up all nice, as you can see!” She gestured at her outfit which just screamed ‘1980s Miami Vice’. Honestly I was ready for Huggy Bear to be the next threat to the world.

“Krillin,” I said, pointing at the short fighter.

“Oh, hey?” Krillin said awkwardly. “Uh… what should I say?”

“Just a general introduction,” I told him. “Like if I asked you to, in one sentence, describe who you were and your profession?”

“Ah, okay.” Krillin blushed a little. “This is so weird though… feel like a movie star. Uh… I’m Krillin and I’m Goku and Bulma’s friend… though I guess you guys haven’t met Goku yet. Or maybe you have. I guess you could put these anywhere?” He shifted, utterly nervous. “Heh. Oh, I’m also Master Roshi’s student! Or I was, you know. Not anymore… though he does teach me things still… I guess I’ll always be his student? Anyway, I don’t really have a day job at the moment as I mostly get by competing in tournaments but I guess I need to find something to do soon and… yeah, yeah that’s it.”

“…that was horrible,” Bulma stated.

“Oh come on!” Krillin shouted. “I didn’t spend all my time practicing it in a mirror like some people!”

“I did not!”

“Yeah, just keep lying!”

Roshi shoved the two away. “Hello ladies!” he crooned as he looked right at Isco. “I am Master Roshi, head of the Turtle School of Martial Arts. I enjoy long walks on the beach and moonlit dinners. I’m partial to blonds but-“

“THIS ISN’T A DATING VIDEO!” Bulma screamed right in Roshi’s ear.

“Said the girl using it to get a new boyfriend!” Krillin teased.

“THAT’S DIFFERENT!”

Isco turned to me. “Who have you gotten us tangled up with?”

“Someone who is very rich,” I told him. “Want a new body that can’t be shattered?”

“…I retract my complaints and also my earlier comment about your intelligence, sir.”

“Hey guys!” a familiar voice called out from the outside of Kame House.

“GOKU!” Krillin cried out and Isco and I found ourselves alone in Roshi’s home as the three stampeded out to greet their friend. I took a far more casual pace, lingering behind them as they asked Goku about Gohan and reacted to him being his son.

‘God… he’s so young,’ I thought to myself. The anime had never really been good at showing ages, save perhaps for Gohan. Unless it was a radical change most of the characters looked the same, agewise, save for Chichi who kept getting the low end of the stick when it came to aging gracefully. By the time of Super she had looked more like Goku’s mom than his wife while Bulma hadn’t hardly aged at all (and retcons about the Dragon Balls didn’t count). Goku in the anime had always been seen as a bit of a manchild by the audience due to his attitude but seeing him there in the flesh, not paper and ink, I could see just how little he had lived in the world. He was in his mid twenties and looked every inch of it and I knew that in a year the weight of the galaxy would be placed on his shoulders.

It was… so unfair.

‘Especially when you see how happy he is right now.’ I watched as Goku knelt down to talk to Gohan, whom he’d settled down on the beach so he could go play with Turtle. ‘Everyone thinks all Goku cares about is fighting and yeah that is a passion of his but… he loves being a dad so much.’ I wiggled my jaw back and forth in frustration. ‘And that’s going to be taken from him. By threats, by the need to protect his family, and then the belief that he is the cause of all this. Damn it all…’

“Hey!” Goku suddenly called out, breaking me out of my thoughts. “Who is that? You get a new student, Master Roshi?”

“Him?” the old man said, glancing at me before snickering. “Come now Goku, I might be the best teacher in the world… along with being strong… and handsome… and a sex machine…”

“Certainly not humble,” I commented.

Isco chimed in, “He is also a skilled liar. I have seen his dating profile.”

“…but even I can’t do much with someone like him!” He waved at me. “That would be like trying to make Bulma a fighter!”

“Hey, be nice to Kayos,” Bulma declared. “There is more to- WHAT DO YOU MEAN MAKE BULMA A FIGHTER!?!” She grabbed Roshi’s ear and began to twist it hard, causing the old man to screech in pain while he flailed his arms about wildly.

“Its okay, Bulma!” I quickly assured her, not wanting to see what happened if she twisted his lobe just a bit more.

Goku though looked at me carefully. “I don’t know, Master Roshi. I’m sure if… uh…”

“Kayos,” I repeated.

“Kayos put in the time he could become a decent fighter! I bet he could do all sorts of cool things if given the chance!”

“Thanks,” I said with a slight smile. “Though I know my strengths are in other areas… and I can win other ways.”

“Oh yeah?” Krillin challenged but in a friendly way, it clear he wasn’t picking on me but was curious and a bit charged up. “And how would you defeat me or Goku or Roshi?”

“Based on what Bulma told me?” I asked. “Poison.”

“…what?” Goku said, eyes going wide. Roshi had stopped fighting with Bulma and Krillin was looking a bit green around the gills at that.

“Yeah,” I said with a shrug. “Slip a few drops into a drink and you’d be done. Wouldn’t even need to make it kill you guys.” I smirked. “Can’t fight if you are crapping out your intestines.”

Krillin clearly was thinking about that, now turning purple along with green, while Goku began to laugh, rubbing the back of his head. “Heh! I guess that would work pretty well! Though I do have an iron stomach! Might not work on me!”

“Are you laughing about him trying to poison you!?!” Krillin exclaimed.

“He said he could, not that he would!” he looked to me. “You aren’t, are you?”

“It would upset your kid so no,” I said with a chuckle before crouching down when Gohan realized I was talking about him. “Hey bud,” I said gently, trying to be as calm and peaceful-looking as possible. Even then though Gohan let out a tiny whimper and ran to hide behind his fahter’s leg.

“Skittish little thing,” Roshi stated. “Nothing at all like you, Goku!”

“Aw, give him time!” Goku declared, picking Gohan up and giving him a cuddle. “He’ll warm up to you guys.”

“Maybe not the food poisoner,” Krillin said darkly, giving me a side-eye.

“Should I be annoyed that you didn’t suggest using me?” Isco stated. “It would be rather easy for me to eliminate the pain receptacles.”

“Are you calling them pain receptacles or suggesting that’s what you’d remove from them?”

“Yes.”

“Hey, is that the Four Star Dragon Ball?” Bulma asked, looking at the orange orb that topped Gohan’s hat.

Goku grinned at that, Gohan reaching up to adjust his hat. “Yeah. I know I named Gohan after him but I like to remember Grandpa however I can and seeing the Dragon Ball always does that.”

Bulma smiled fondly. “I remember how we spent so much time hunting these things down. So odd we haven’t needed to in five years.”

“Well I suppose that we don’t need to make a wi-“ Goku was cut off when Bulma covered his mouth with her hand, looking at me and letting out a weak and rather fake laugh.

“Weekend of it! Make a weekend of it! Right Goku?”

“Huh?” Goku said, words muffled, before he remembered that I wasn’t supposed to know about the Dragon Balls. Bulma probably figured it would be better for them to remain a secret, something I didn’t blame her for in the slightest. It was dangerous enough that some people knew about them… the more that did the greater the threat.

‘Wonder how long it will take before they reveal them to me?’ I wondered. ‘If I’m around them enough because of this documentary I suppose-‘

Goku suddenly froze, looking towards the ocean, and I knew at once what was happening.

“Roshi, get Gohan inside,” I snapped.

“What are ya on about?” Roshi said. “I-“ he suddenly snapped his head in the same direction that Goku was looking and I knew he’d sensed Raditz’ approach as well. “Right. Come on kiddo, let’s get tucked inside.” He grabbed Gohan from his father, the little boy letting out whimpering cries and reaching for his dad but Roshi kept a tight hold on him and raced back into Kame House.

“Goku, what is going on?” Bulma asked.

“Something is coming… I think it might be Piccolo.”

“Piccolo!?!” Krillin cried out, suddenly VERY nervous. “Are… are you sure?”

“Yeah…” Goku said and by that point a flying body could be seen rushing towards us. “Bulma, Kayos, stay back okay? Krillin and I will handle this.”

“Don’t have to tell me twice!” Bulma declared, hurrying to hide in Kame House. However before I could make a move Raditz landed, looking at us with an air of condescending arrogance. “Whoa. Unless Piccolo decided to get a makeover…”

“Hmmmpf,” Raditz said in annoyance, looking us all over, “and I thought some of the shitholes I’ve been to were bad but this planet might be the worst.” He walked over to one of the bushes, examining it for a moment before letting out another huff. “Seriously, Kakarot, how have you not managed to bring this planet to heel? The citizens are utterly pathetic! They wouldn’t even make decent target practice.”

Goku… blinked at that. “Uh… are you talking to me?” He pointed to himself, shoulders slightly slouched and eyes wide.

Raditz spun around and glared at the orange gi-wearing man. “Am I… of course I’m talking to you! Who else would I be addressing? These earthlings? The robot?” He gestured at Isco. “As if I could be bothered to deal with such powerless filth! What is the matter with you, anyway?”

“Well, it’s just… you keep calling me Kakarot. My name’s Goku.”

“Goku?” Raditz rolled the name along his tongue. “Goku.” He smirked. “That’s a pathetic name. Not suited for a Saiyan, even one as weak as you, brother. Why would you allow yourself to be called that?”

“Well, that’s what my grandpa named me. He never told me I had another name.”

“You only have one name. Kakarot. The name given to you by your people.”

“You mean the Saiyans?” Goku asked. When Raditz nodded he added, “What’s a Saiyan?”

“You don’t know what a Saiyan is?!” Raditz roared.

“THAT’S what you focus on!?!” Bulma cried out. “He just said he’s your brother!”

“So what?” Goku said, looking back at her in confusion.

“Goku,” I said slowly, “do you know what a ‘brother’ is?” It might have seemed like a dumb thing to ask but he had spent much of his life living alone in the woods. I had vague memories of Goku having no idea what a ‘woman’ was and thinking marriage was a food. It was a legit concern.

“Sure!” Goku exclaimed though I wasn’t quite sure if he was telling the truth or not. “I just don’t see what the big deal is! I mean, okay, maybe we had the same mom and dad-“ He suddenly smiled, scratching his head, “Huh, I have a mom and dad! I never thought about.”

“Of course you have a mom and dad!” Bulma roared. “Everyone has a mom and dad!”

“Not Piccolo,” I chimed in.

“See, Kayos gets it!” Goku said with a laugh. “A mom and dad. I mean I had Grandpa Gohan and that was enough for me so I never really thought about it. I wouldn’t mind meeting them if they are still around… though if they are anything like this guy I’m not sure if I’d want to.” He gave a small shrug. “But being my brother? I mean it’s good to know about but, well, Krillin is more of my brother than some random stranger! So why would him saying he’s my brother change anything?”

“Wait… really?” Krillin said in surprise, the tension leaving his body. “You… think of my as your brother?”

“Well… yeah!” Goku perked up even more, as if saying those words caused them to solidify into something concrete and real. “Yeah! I like that! You’re my brother, Krillin!” He looked into Kame House, tilting his head and tapping his chin. “And Bulma really should be my sister, now that I think about it. No offense Krillin but I’ve known her longer. She’s one of my oldest friends so it makes sense she be my sister.”

“Oh… oh Goku!” Bulma said, waving her hands in front of her face, blinking rapidly.

“Huh,” Goku said, now really thinking things over. “I guess that makes Master Roshi like my… sunglasses wearing uncle. And as for Tien and Yamcha and Chiaotzu and Yaj-“

Raditz suddenly grabbed him by the arm and spun him around before moving to punch him in the stomach. Goku though managed to just twist away from the blow, only for Raditz to move to strike him in the face. Once more Goku dodged the attack and moved to strike his brother but Raditz easily caught his fist and smirked, twisting Goku’s wrist before he kicked him hard, sending him flying back. Goku popped up quickly though and fell into a defensive stance, all his earlier befuddlement gone in the face of that attack. Krillin mimicked him while Isco zipped over to me, deciding to use me as a shield.

“Do not ignore me, Kakarot!” Raditz demanded. “You have a lot to answer for! This planet should have been left a without a speck of life on it and instead I find you standing around chatting away with these low-level cretins! Calling them family over ME! You should be helping me slaughter them all, not chatting away about how they are your family! I am your family and you have a duty to the Saiyan race!”

Goku merely narrowed his eyes at that. “I don’t know who you are and why you think you can just show up and begin screaming at me but I’m not going t put up with it!”

“You truly have no idea, do you?” the other Saiyan said before letting out a laugh. “You don’t, do you! There is not even a single inkling in that head of yours who you are, what you are.” Raditz cackled at that. “Perhaps you can be forgiven for your failure, little brother, as well as your attitude… so long as you have a decent enough excuse for the loss of your memories.” He jabbed a finger at Goku. “You are a member of the Saiyan Race, the greatest warriors in all the universe. With the destruction of our home, the Planet Vegeta, only four of us remain but even then we remain some of the most feared beings in all the Galaxy. I came here to seek out your help, for there is a planet that needs to be wiped clean of all life that is proving bothersome. Yet you can’t even get this world cleared out of the filth that calls it home?” He frowned. “Instead you actually LIVE among them? Where is your pride, Kakarot!?”

“I have plenty of pride,” Goku told him, eyes narrowed in determination. “It’s that pride that keeps me from just mindlessly destroying everything just because I could. Anyone can destroy… it takes a powerful person to understand their power and not let it control them. And I don’t like you talking that way about my friends… no. Talking about my FAMILY that way. So unless you want to apologize then I’m going to MAKE you.”

That made the Saiyan Warrior laugh. “Finally! I was afraid being sent to this pathetic planet had made you utterly weak!” He tensed, readying for battle. “I will make sure you understand your place. You will fall in line and then you will help me ensure that every pathetic being on this planet knows their doom came to them at the hands of Raditz! So prepare yourself because that little scuffle we just had wasn’t even a warmup for me!”

“Goku?” I called out before the two could launch themselves at each other. “Maybe you want to move this someplace you can stretch your legs?” I looked back towards Kame House, thankful that Roshi had managed to keep Gohan inside and away from Raditz’s line of sight. “You know, allow you to go all out. The island isn’t really suited for a true brawl.”

“Right!” Goku said, rising in the air. “Come on Raditz… you want a fight? I know where were to go to have one. There is a grass plain 60 miles from here… we can fight there.”

“Lead on, brother, lead on. I’ll enjoy putting you in your place!” He looked right back at me. “Enjoy this brief reprieve, human. Because when we return my brother will get to watch as I destroy you all!”

With that Goku and Raditz rocketed off, leaving us behind.

“Krillin, can you find your friends and get them to where Goku is going?” I asked. “I have a feeling he’s going to need all the help he can get.”

“Yeah, I think you’re right!” Krillin declared. “I know Goku is strong but what I sensed from that Raditz guy…” He shook his head and I completely got it; even being a human with a power level most likely in the single digits I had felt Raditz’s strength. It was the same ancient instinct that had allowed my primal ancestors know there was a predator nearby. “Hopefully Tien and Yamcha are close enough by…” He took off without saying another word, leaving the rest of us behind without a second glance. Not that I blamed him, all things considered.

“Do you think that strange man could be Goku’s brother?” Bulma asked as Roshi came out, holding a sniffling Gohan’s hand. The boy rubbed his nose with his sleeve, worrying his lip with his teeth. “I mean… he can’t, right?”

“Its possible,” Roshi stated. “Goku’s grandpa stated that he found Goku in a strange pod-like device. He wasn’t sure what it was but perhaps it came from wherever that strange warrior came from. I assumed that it was just an egg and that Goku was from a weird race of monkey people… but perhaps he truly is an alien.”

“Does it matter, though?” I asked.

“Of course it doesn’t!” Bulma yelled at me and I quickly threw up my hands to defend myself. “Sorry,” she said, instantly deflated. “I get it… just asking questions. That’s what I paid you to do. Its just-“

“You’re worried, I get that.”

“Daddy?” Gohan whimpered. “Where did my daddy go?” He looked about rapidly, tears gathering in his eyes.

“Oh… oh sweetie,” Bulma knelt down so she could look Gohan in the eye. “He had to go take care of that bad man but he’ll be back soon, I promise. Until then you are safe with us.”

“He… he said… you were his sister?” Gohan frowned, mulling over that new word. “What does that mean?”

“It means she’s your aunt,” I chimed in. “They look after kids if their mom and dad are busy.”

“Aunt?” the little boy said, staring at Bulma.

“Yeah!” she declared, perking up. “I’m Aunt Bulma! And me and Uncle Roshi are going to make sure you are safe until your dad returns.”

As Bulma comforted Gohan I walked over to Roshi, Isco following after. “Goku is in trouble, isn’t he?” I whispered, low enough that Gohan couldn’t hear. “I can’t do a tenth of what Bulma says you guys can do but Raditz…”

“Yes,” Roshi said softly, all his earlier guffing and joking gone in the face of this new threat. “Raditz… he is beyond anything Goku has ever faced. While it is impressive that Goku has remained as strong as he has, after getting married and having a son, he hasn’t grown in strength like he did back when he was fully dedicated to his training. He has leveled off and I am worried that will make him unable to overcome Raditz. And what he is after…” The old man gripped his walking stick. “With Piccolo he wanted to take over the world. Raditz just wants to destroy it!”

“I suppose,” Isco stated, “that it is too much to hope that much like his hair Raditz was embellishing his abilities to compensate for something?”

“Heh,” Roshi laughed but it was weak and forced. “We can only hope…”

I frowned as I looked at the ocean. ‘The smart thing would be to stay here and hope that things work out like they did last time. Maybe even better, if Krillin is with Goku. They could meet up with Piccolo and convince him to fight with them…’ I glanced over at Gohan and Bulma and set my jaw. ‘Or things could get far worse.’

A curse flew past my lips before I was moving towards Bulma’s ship.

“Kayos?” she called out, carrying Gohan with her. “What are you doing?”

“Helping,” I said, shaking my head. “Lord knows I have no idea WHAT I’ll be able to do but I have to try.”

“You can’t fight Raditz!” Roshi cried out in a panic. “You’d be slaughtered!”

“Yeah,” I muttered because I’d found myself in Dragon Ball Z as a normal human. No special moves. No magic. Nothing.

Just my brains.

“But… I have some theories,” I said as I began to puzzle over what I could do to help. Ideas began to race through my head, growing like acorns, taking roots so that, hopefully, when I did end up at the battle field, I would have a mighty oak in their place.

“Well don’t take the car!” Bulma protested. “I just got it waxed. Here!” She ran over to the side and pulled out a capsule box, selecting one and clicking it to allow for a flying motorcycle-like vehicle to appear, complete with a helmet.

“Thanks,” I said as I grabbed the helmet and slipped it on. I looked over at Bulma and another thought struck me. “Can I have some capsules? Doesn’t matter what you give me…”

“Yeah, that might be a good idea. Do you know anything about healing?”

“I do.” It was sports medicine but it was better than anything.

“Then take this,” she said, handing me one small traveling case of capsules. “And these two.” She passed me another two cases which I secured to the bike. “One has food, which Goku is going to want after his fight. The other… well, I’m not for sure-“

“Hopefully I won’t need them but if I do… well, anything is better than nothing,” I said as I hopped onto the bike . “Isco, staying here or coming?”

“I am out of a job if you die, sir,” Isco said, using his arms to lock himself onto the bike.

“Then let’s go.”

“Kayos!” Bulma called out. “…be careful.”

I gave a nod, knowing I was about to do anything BUT.

And with that we rose in the air, Bulma and Roshi waving goodbye before I rocketed off towards the dumbest thing I’d ever done.

~MC~MC~MC~

Chapter Text

One Month Earlier…

“I don’t see why we can’t just go in now and deal with Frieza now!”

Prince Vegeta let out a scoff at that as he munched on his food, not even bothering to look up. The small grassland moon they had found was full of fat juicy animals and the Saiyans had made quick work of taking down as much as possible so they could have a feast. It had been a busy month and they deserved that much. “And we’d be killed before we even got near him,” he said as he grabbed a container of water and took a large swing before returning to the sucking the meat out of a shelled creature’s tail.

“Come on!” Nappa declared, a half eaten green fruit the size of his fist held tight in his fingers. “Frieza never fights, you said it yourself! We go in and we’d probably be able to break his arms before he could say a word!” He grinned at that, clearly thinking about how wonderful it would be to hear the sounds of the Emperor screaming in agony. Raditz had to admit it was something he’d love to hear… would probably record it with his scouter and enjoy it while soaking in one of the water tubs.

“Use your head,” the Prince snapped as he grabbed a large well roasted leg of… well, Raditz had no idea what the creature was called but he did know it tasted really good. Perhaps they should hold off wiping out their entire species… would be nice to have a regular supply. “Frieza is never alone! He has Zarbon and Dodoria always at his side! Do you think that they are going to meekly stand there while you attack Frieza? They are utterly loyal to him… to betray him would be like hacking off their own foot.”

“We can take’em!” Nappa declared.

Raditz rolled his eyes at that. “No, we can’t.” He snagged a wing of some creature that had been scaly yet also had fur as well and sank his teeth into it. The bastard had been hard to clean and cook but it was worth it, as it had a good spice to it even without them doing much other than tossing it into the fire. “And then there is the Ginyu Force. Do YOU want to face those five?”

“Frieza wouldn’t have the Ginyu Force around!” Nappa declared. “He only brings them to a planet if there are super strong fighters. There is no one around like that.”

“Other than us?” Prince Vegeta said slowly, eying Nappa carefully.

“I… I didn’t mean to say…” the older Saiyan stammered, realizing he’d stepped in it.

“No, you didn’t. Just like you haven’t been thinking things out clearly. We only get once chance at this and if we have any hope of taking out Frieza and gaining control of the Empire we MUST think things through carefully.” He paused. “Because the moment we kill Frieza, King Cold and Prince Cooler will be alerted. If we do not have the Frieza Force on our side then they will wipe us out. But please, Nappa, if you wish to die so quickly you are more than welcome to go retrieve your scouter and let Frieza know what you are plotting.”

Nappa turned and stared fearfully to the north. About four miles away they had left their scouters attached to some slow moving, rather lazy looking furry creatures. Despite then having long claws they’d only yawned and scratched themselves as the three had attached their scouters to the creatures before flying off. While it was possible to turn off the communication feature on a scouter there was a chance that someone at one of the Frieza Stations could flip it back on; they did that at times, just to make sure that no one was plotting or scheming. It wasn’t common but occasionally someone would decide to quietly take one of the planets they were supposed to cleanse as their own and thus the random check ins would help catch them doing just that. Raditz himself had been sent twice to deal with such soldiers who thought to make themselves kings. And then there were the survivors of planets that they wiped clean who tried to infiltrate the Frieza Force and take it apart from the inside; it was always amusing to see just who of the new recruits would die first. Cui still owed Raditz after their last bet.

So the scouters were attached to the sleepy animals and would record that the Saiyans were sleeping if anyone activated any of their tracking features. As much as Raditz hated how everyone saw them as little more than savage brutes he was willing to use their own beliefs against them in this case.

When Nappa made no move to leave Prince Vegeta shook his head. “I thought not.” He looked at the two of them with narrowed eyes. “We will need to choose our moment… and keep this quiet. We can not rely on anyone else to do this, only the three of us. So I suggest you keep your mouths shut.”

“Of course,” Raditz said, a touch annoyed at the Prince was speaking to him like he was any other soldier in Frieza’s army. ‘We have fought side by side since he was 5 years old and yet that means nothing to you. My father proved to be the most successful squadron leader in his generation. King Vegeta honored him by placing me as a part of your squad. I was meant to be your advisor and ally… and yet you treat me like I am little more than hired muscle.’

He didn’t say a word of that, however. If he had Prince Vegeta wouldn’t have bothered attacking him, choosing instead to send Nappa after him. The loyal lapdog, bond by his promise to a dead man that could never say it completed, never attempting to rise up in the ranks by proving his strength. And they had all seen how having him be the Prince’s shadow had affected Vegeta, preventing him from truly understanding how the world worked.

‘He believes that he is destined to lead purely because of his birth. King Vegeta could bring to submission any who dared tried to stand against him and they would show their honor by falling into line. He knew that they would continue to plot his downfall and used that to motivate himself to grow stronger. That is how it is supposed to work. Offer a hand to your fallen foe but know they would always be a threat so you needed to continue to strive to grow stronger. But if Prince Vegeta ever suspected that I was attempting to take command from him he would see me killed in an instant!’

“But Vegeta,” Nappa said and Raditz wondered if the man noticed how much the Prince HATED how familiar the bald headed saiyan was with him, “would it not be better to try and have others fight with us?” He grinned. “I’m-“

“You have something stuck in your teeth.”

Nappa blinked, his boast short-circuited by that, and Raditz chuckled softly as the large man hurried to removed the bit of stringy meat that had gotten caught between his two front teeth. When that was done he began again, trying to build up his bluster but failing. “I’m sure there are plenty who are tired of groveling to Frieza. And if not I’m sure I can… convince them… to join up.” He pounded his fist into his open palm.

Vegeta though merely shot him a cold stare. “Tell me, Nappa… what would you do if you learned that there was someone plotting against me?”

“Well, I’d tell you.” He said it so matter of fact that even though it was the truth it came off as being so utterly stupid it hurt Raditz’s brain.

That caused the Saiyan to snap, “And you think that those members of the Frieza Force you went to in hopes of bringing them to our side wouldn’t run and tell Frieza?”

“Watch your tone!” Nappa snarled, leaping to his feet. And jabbing a finger at Raditz. “You are lucky you are allowed to sit with us, you weakling-“

“NAPPA!” Vegeta snapped and at once the bald Saiyan froze. “Raditz is right. We can only trust the three of us. No one else. It will make things harder for our plan but this is a matter that only we can handle.”

Seeing his chance Raditz spoke up. “What if… there were more of us?”

“Oh, this isn’t about the rumors about your uncle we heard back at Station 318?” Nappa said with a laugh, sitting back down. “Turles is long dead! The only reason his body wasn’t brought back to King Vegeta is because I vaporized his ship!”

“Assuming Turles existed in the first place,” Prince Vegeta stated. “I have always believed he was just a fabrication my father created to ensure no Saiyans thought themselves strong enough to disobey. ‘Remember Turles and let him be a reminder of what happens to he who betrays me’.”

Raditz didn’t react in the slightest to the mockery. He knew that his mother’s brother was still out there. He’d heard enough whispers of the saiyan with gray hued skin who led a band of Space Pirates that nibbled on the edges of Frieza’s empire. Of the planets found stripped of their riches, rendered so inhospitable that even Frieza found little use for them at times. But Turles was not someone that he’d ever want to go after; he had been warned by his father (in the few times he’d seen the man before his death) that Turles cared only for himself, not even showing loyalty to his own squad. A Saiyan that no Saiyan should strive to be like.

No… he had someone else in mind.

“I was referring to my brother.”

“Your brother?” Prince Vegeta asked, raising an eyebrow at that. “You have a brother?”

“Kakarot, yes,” Raditz confirmed. “My father sent him to a planet to serve as an eradicator when he was just a baby, only a few hours before Planet Vegeta was destroyed.”

“And you just bring this up now?” Nappa snapped. “There was another Saiyan out there and you failed to mention it?”

“I thought him dead, destroyed with the planet,” Raditz answered. “But when we began discussing our… issues… with Frieza I decided to look the last day of Planet Vegeta in hopes someone might have escaped as we did through luck and discovered that his pod had managed to launch before the planet’s destruction. He landed on a planet known as Earth according to the records we have and is there now.”

“And if he isn’t?” Nappa pressed.

“Then he would have been useless to us,” Raditz reasoned.

“Hmmm… another Saiyan,” Prince Vegeta stated, eyes half shut. He smirked slightly and nodded. “Yes… yes that might work out well. Even if he proves weak he would be something that Frieza wasn’t prepared for.” Prince Vegeta rose up. Behind him and on either side were piles of bones and the only thing that would have made the Prince of Saiyans happier would have been if they were the bones of his enemies. “You can retrieve him without anyone noticing?”

“I’ve been told to take out a band of planets; per my pod that will take 8 months to reach and I have been given another six to do so, as they are said to be technologically advanced.” He leaned forward and grinned. “However I learned just a few days ago that their sun went supernova… they were wiped out, rendered little more than charred rocks. I managed to kill the one that found that out and made it look like a desertion. I now have just over a year… more than enough time to go, retrieve my brother, and make sure he is up to snuff.”

Prince Vegeta nodded at that. “Nappa and I have been assigned 12 planets each… we will work together and get it done in half the time and then begin training. We will meet back here in 14 month’s time… and see if Kakarot is worth all this trouble.”

“It will be on your head if he isn’t!” Nappa warned.

Raditz merely bowed in respect and Prince Vegeta flew off to retrieve his scouter, Nappa following right behind him.

‘Bastards,’ Raditz thought to himself, realizing they meant for him to clean up on his own. It had been his gear that they’d used to cook the meal and instead of helping him scrub the knives and such they’d left him to deal with it, like he was little more than a non-combatant!

Raditz narrowed his eyes, hands clenched into fists.

‘I was supposed to be your ally… I was willing to be your advisor and instead you treat me like a nothing. Well, my prince, you are in for a surprise. I’m going to find Kakarot and once I prove myself his better he will help me grow strong enough to defeat you and Nappa. You will submit to me or you will surrender all your honor at the cost of your life.’

He paused.

‘And then, Frieza… I will take all you care about.’

It hadn’t just been Kakarot’s location that he had learned of a few weeks back. No… the Frieza Force soldier he’d forced to hack into the records had also discovered footage of the day Planet Vegeta had been destroyed. It had been no meteor… it had been Frieza himself who had done the deed. Why he did Raditz did not know, only that their Emperor had decided to destroy the Planet and the entire Saiyan race save for the four that remained. But the Saiyans hadn’t died meekly… some had fought back. Resisted.

And at the front had been Raditz’s father.

‘You will die, Frieza,’ Raditz thought, the image of his father’s final defiant stand burned into his brain. ‘Vegeta and Nappa might not care about their families… but you killed my mother and father. Took my home. And with my brother… you will pay. I will claim your Empire and the universe will grovel at the feet of Emperor Raditz!’

~MC~MC~MC~

Present Day

“I believe we have found them, sir,” Isco stated as we spotted three figures battling each other in the distance. They were on a grassy plain but with the way they kept getting hit I doubted the grass was cushioning Goku and Piccolo’s falls all that much. “Do you have a plan?”

“A theory or two, mostly,” I admitted. “Depends on how Raditz reacts to me showing up.”

I saw a glow coming from one of the figures and quickly sent the cycle into a dive just before an orb of energy came racing towards me. While I’d never driven a motorcycle before and certainly not a flying one I had rode 4-Wheelers growing up, racing them through the bumpy fields and along tractor lanes. That knowledge and experience came in handy and I had quickly been able to push the bike to the limit. Thankfully my quick handling of the bike got us out of the way of the attack with plenty of time to spare but it didn’t make me feel good that I was already being fired on and hadn’t even stepped onto the ground.

Parking the bike I saw Goku and Piccolo, both of whom had already removed their weighted clothing, looking a bit mussed up while Raditz wasn’t looking that flustered at all. All three turned to stare at me, Raditz smirking while Piccolo frowned.

“Goku, who is that?”

“Oh, that’s Kayos!” Goku chirped. “Not sure why he’s here though…”

Raditz jabbed a finger at me, a dark smirk on his lips. “I warned you, Kakarot, that I would only allow you one partner in this battle. And I only allowed that because the Namekian here seems rather interesting. Yet here is a little human come bursting in here. You broke your word… so its up to me to show you why you shouldn’t lie to your family!” Raditz’s hand began to glow and I did what I could: talked right out of my ass.

“Haven’t you ever heard of the press corp?” I called out quickly even as I tensed, ready to run. “Documentation of victory?”

Raditz didn’t lower his hand but he didn’t make the glow any more intense. “Documentation of victory?”

“Of course. We do it on earth all the time. Any time there is a fight of importance we record it so everyone else on Earth can see it. Would be hard for everyone to watch, after all… but this way you have freedom to do whatever you need to in a fight but still get everyone watching.” I glanced at Isco. “We record the fight and make sure everyone knows who the strongest fighter is. Neutral bystander.”

“Damn it Goku, why did you ask a camera man to come here?” Piccolo demanded, unknowingly backing up my claim. “If he can’t fight he’s useless-“

Raditz though held up his other hand while the one that had been gathering energy dismissed the ki instantly. “Wait… you mean to say that everyone on this mudhole will know that I am the mightiest fighter?”

“Of course!” I said quickly. “Goku and Piccolo are the two strongest fighters on Earth. Everyone knows that thanks to the last tournament we had. If I record you beating them then everyone knows that you are the strongest.”

That made the Saiyan smile for more genuinely. “Oh… oh I like that. I like that a lot! I’m all for a good fight but it gets so tiring dealing with weaklings that can’t take a punch! Keeps me from the real fun! This would cow all you worthless humans into submission, wouldn’t it? Let you know that you have no chance in defeating me if they saw me defeat they best they can muster! Which isn’t much when the best aren’t even from this planet!” He let out a boisterous laugh. “Finally, a human with a bit of brains! I might keep you around, worm, if you prove your worth. I always wanted a pet.”

I nodded. “I’ll just stay out of the way. Won’t even realize I’m here.”

“Very well.” Raditz turned back towards Goku and Piccolo… only to suddenly shoot a ki blast right in front of me, causing me to jump. “But… if any more of your friends show up, Kakarot, I won’t miss. This one is your last freebie.”

“Beep, boop, do not mention what I am, beep, boop,” Isco said.

“Laying it on thick there buddy-FUCK!” I dove for cover as the three warriors began to battle each other, throwing kicks and punches at one another as they attempted to find an opening, letting the Ki blasts fly freely.

Despite the fact that up until 30 minutes ago the two had been enemies it was rather interesting to see how in tune with one another Piccolo and Goku were. They didn’t stumble over each other or need to watch out for when one was throwing a punch lest the other get hit. No… they moved perfectly in sync, knowing when to push forward and when to fall back to allow the other a chance to get in a blow. Despite what Piccolo might have desired others to believe he wasn’t a selfish fighter who wanted to claim the kill on his own. Rather he gave just as much as he took.

‘The hero he is destined to be is there, waiting to be born,’ I thought to myself as Piccolo fell back, allowing Goku and Raditz to trade blows. Or, to be more accurate, allow Goku to swing and kick at Raditz who ducked and bobbed and weaved. At times he didn’t even bother to raise his hands, instead keeping them folded over his chest or pressed against his sides, merely twisting his torso and ducking to avoid the strikes.

And then suddenly Goku went low, moving for a leg sweep that Raditz easily dodged… only for Piccolo to fire off a barrage of ki blasts that struck him right on the chest, pounding into him like a flurry of haymakers and sending the Saiyan flying back. Piccolo let out a battlecry and began to thrust his hands out again and again, sending more ki blasts that rained down on Raditz, causing him to disappear in a cloud of dirt and grass.

“Yeah!” Goku cheered, thrusting his fist into the air. “Great job Piccolo! That’s… oh.”

Raditz got back up, brushing off his armor.

“Well well well… the Green Man has some interesting tricks. Quite the impressive display… I think you managed to scratch my armor.” He looked it over, rubbing his fist against it before sighing. “No… just a scuff. Well then, let me show you how a true warrior does it!” Raditz rapidly thrust out his own hands, over and over and over again, and 30 different ki blasts launched from his palms, flying all over and forcing the Namekian warrior to try and twist and dodge. But there were simply too many and he took a good number of hits; unlike Raditz though he went crashing down beside me, gasping in pain. “Aw, I think I broke him already, little brother. And you said he was your rival? That doesn’t say much about you and your power!”

Goku, to his credit, instantly leapt back into battle.

“Are you okay, Piccolo?” I asked, kneeling down beside him.

“I’m fine,” he said curtly, getting up. “Just need a moment to catch my breath.”

“Right,” I said before dropping my voice to a whisper. “Goku’s too honorable to do what needs to be done.”

“What’s that?”

“Goku. Him and his friends… they are the best of humanity. But you know us humans… we clawed and scratched and did everything we could to rise to the top. And we always do. We will kill each other in order to have just a little bit more of something we don’t really need.” I looked back at the fight. “So… willing to fight dirty, like human?”

He glanced at me and a smirk slowly formed on his lips. “What do you have in mind?”

“Raditz rarely leaves the ground. He can fly but he likes to use the earth to propel himself forward.”

“Of course, it uses less energy to do that and you can stop quicker.”

“What if the ground wasn’t safe anymore to do that?” I asked, holding up my hand to reveal a few capsules.

“Hmm… that might work. It would be best if you tossed them… I can distract him. I’ll make sure to stay off the ground as much as I can.”

I nodded before holding up a few more capsules. “Also, if you were able to shove one down his throat…”

THAT caused the Namekian to twist back to stare at me. “What?”

“Where I’m from there’s a combat move known as Ant-Man In Thanos. I think it might work here.”

“That is horrifying,” Piccolo said before flashing me a fang-filled smile. “I like it.”

“And just what are you two plotting?” Raditz asked, catching Goku in the stomach with a powerful punch that had the young hero gasping for air. He lifted Goku clear off his feet, letting him dangle off his fist for a moment before he casually let him drop, kicking him away for good measure before he could touch the ground.

“Getting his statement on the fight, sir,” I called out. “Do you mind me calling you sir? Or is there another title I should use for you?”

“Master would work fine.”

I grimaced. “Miiiiiight wanna think of a different one. In a lot of cultures that has a very… sexual undertone.”

That caused Raditz to pause, blinking as he considered my words. “…seriously?”

“Apparently,” Piccolo admitted.

“Hmmm.”

“Lord is a good one,” I pointed out.

Raditz smiled at that. “Lord Raditz. I like it. Yes, you may refer to me as such!” He suddenly was right on Piccolo, swinging at him only for the Namekian to duck while I once more found myself scrambling for cover. Isco, the lucky bastard, had taken to the skies to avoid any chances he might get hit after the last flurry of key blasts. “I would suggest coming up with titles for this one-“ He grabbed Piccolo by the head, forcing his skull back, “-but he won’t be around long to hear any of them.”

Piccolo opened his mouth and fired off an energy blast that had Raditz cursing and yanking his arm away. “Only because I’ll be too busy celebrating your defeat!” he declared as he moved in to once more take on Raditz, the Saiyan warrior returning to the defensive.

“I hope you aren’t expecting me to begin calling you ‘lord’, sir,” Isco said, floating down to me.

“I’m not conceited like that,” I commented, waiting for the right moment so I could fling out a capsule. Piccolo suddenly rose up in an attempt to try and slam his knee into Raditz’s face only for his foe to easily duck away before aiming to strike Piccolo in the chest with an open palm. For his part Piccolo dodged that attack before kicking at Raditz, catching him on the chin and snapping his head back. “Now.”

The capsule flew out of my hand as Raditz stumbled back.

The long haired Saiyin wiped his mouth with the back of his hand as he braced himself to launch another assault. “Oh, you are-“

His foot came down and suddenly he was flung up as a large four post pink princess bed formed under him.

“…god damn it, Bulma,” I muttered.

“Well… that happened,” Isco commented as Piccolo, rather than laugh at what had happened, went on the offensive. He fired off several ki blasts at Raditz who spun around and recovered, too angry about the suddenly appearance of the bed to actually question it. He instead snarled and launched himself at Piccolo only for Goku to rocket right at him, having recovered finally and join in on the fight. Goku, much to my surprise, grabbing one of the posts of the bed and slammed it into Raditz’s stomach before trying to tie him up with the sheets.

“You think those little tricks will stop me, brother!?” Raditz roared as he flexed, bursting out of the linens. “I have encountered every tactic there is!”

“Okay then!” Goku said, spinning in the air before launching himself upwards again. Piccolo fired a few more ki blasts and I took aim, flinging another capsule, this one in a high arc. Sure enough after a few seconds it poofed open to reveal an entire vanity with mirror, which crashed down beside Raditz, startling him as makeup and powders bounced around him. “How about this? Ka... ma….”

“We should move,” I whispered, Isco already buzzing off as I leapt onto the cycle and turned it on.

“Ha… ma….”

Raditz roared and thrust out his own hands to prepare for the hit, taking several blasts from Piccolo along his back for his trouble. But still he refused to move, focused entirely on his brother.

“HA!” Goku roared, firing off the Kamahamaha. The energy blast thundered down at Raditz and when I glanced back I had the distinct impression of him staring in shock before the blast hit him full on, the warrior screaming with a fury as he fought against it. I had to turn away thanks to the light that was coming off of the blast, bringing the cycle to a stop about a football field’s length away from where I had been.

“Did that work?” Isco asked.

“AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!” Raditz roared.

“Nope,” I muttered as the warrior blasted himself into the air, pounding Goku repeatedly in the face, battering the orange gi-wearing hero as he had no chance to raise his hands to defense himself. Again and again he pounded into Goku, grabbing him by the hair and forcing his head up so he could have better access to his face.

“Impressive, little brother!” Raditz bellowed. “But not nearly enough to defeat me!”

Piccolo was suddenly on him, slamming his hand against Raditz’s open mouth. The Saiyan blinked as he realized that something had been shoved between his teeth…

…before an entire banana cream pie appear between his lips.

“Fuck I grabbed a food one,” I muttered even as Raditz, startled, dropped Goku who slammed into the ground in a heap.

Raditz spat and hissed as he yanked the tin out of his mouth before he delivered a double-fisted haymaker down on Piccolo’s back, sending him crashing down next to Goku.

“And so it ends,” Raditz whispered, panting and wiping more cream away with his forearm. He dropped down, pressing his foot on Goku’s back, making the younger Saiyan groan. “Surrender, brother!”

“Hey!” Krillin shouted as he flew in. Yamcha, Tien, and Chiaotzu were right behind him, all landing with their fists clenched and bodies tensed as they prepared for battle. “You stay away from them!”

“Oh look, brother,” Raditz said with a pleased growl, “more of your little friends are here to see you submit.” He pressed his foot down more and Goku let out a cry. “Do you see… at your very best you had no hope of defeating me. Now surrender!” Goku said nothing and Raditz snarled and kicked him in the ribs hard. “You are beaten! Know your place, brother! Acknowledge me as your better!”

‘Your very best,’ I thought as my brain screamed out a way for us to get out of this mess. It might lead to my death… but at this point with Goku and Piccolo down and the rest of the Z Fighters no where ready to take on Raditz? It was our only chance.

I stepped forward.

“You’re wrong, Lord Raditz!”

He turned towards me and I forced myself to meet his gaze.

“Oh? And what mistake have I made? Kakarot is broken. Defeated. Unable to even rise. The Namekian proved to be a disappointment. And these other humans are barely worth my time. I could destroy them with a single blast. So tell me, servant… what mistake have I made?” He narrowed his eyes, the threat clear if I didn’t answer in a way that pleased him.

‘All or nothing,’ I thought. “Goku wasn’t at his very best. He hasn’t fully been training for five years. He worked out, yes… but he isn’t in fighting shape.”

“So what?” Raditz asked with an annoyed huff.

“So you can’t claim you beat him at his best. You didn’t break Son Goku at his prime.”

Raditz… considered that.

“You think he can do more?”

“I do,” I answered. “And I think you want to see that. You need to know that you can beat him when he’s prepared himself for you. Because if you don’t… him dying at your hands? It means nothing. It proves nothing. And you’ll spend the rest of your life wondering if you could have beaten him if he had been ready. The whispers will always follow you.”

Goku let out a moan as Raditz lifted his foot from him.

“And how long do you think he would need, human, to reach his prime?”

“2 years?” I offered. ‘With that we could use the Dragon Balls multiple times… even have a chance to maybe go to Namek and see if Guru could unlock everyone’s potential. Get everyone up to a power level where they could survive the Hyperbolic Time Chamber…’

Raditz scoffed. “I don’t have two years.”

“You’d be able to train to,” I suggested. “That way no one could claim either side had an advantage. You prepare, we prepare. Truly determine who is the best, so there is never any doubt.”

“Krillin, who is this guy?” Tien whispered.

“Bulma’s friend but let him speak,” Krillin hissed. “Anything that keeps that guy away from Goku…”

“What is Piccolo doing here though?” Yamcha asked.

“We can ask later if we survive,” Chiaotzu said softly.

Raditz shook his head again though he had considered my suggestion for far longer. It was his Saiyan blood, after all. He couldn’t help but hunger for the fight. “Like I said… I don’t have two years. Six months.”

‘That won’t work. The gang was barely up to snuff against the Seibermen with a year.’ Outloud I offered, “18 months.”

“9 months.”

‘Time to go for the kill.’ Outloud I offered, “13 months earth months. One month for them to recover from this, as well as allow you to find where you want to train, as I imagine you don’t want to stick around this shithole we call home. One year to train.”

“…deal,” Raditz said after a moment, kneeling down and grabbing Goku by the hair, lifting his head up. “Did you hear that, brother? In 13 months time we will all return to this spot… and if you give me as pathetic of a showing as this then I will have you submit to my authority. You fall into line and do as I say. As is my right.” He slammed Goku’s face down into the dirt before rising up into the air.

I let out a sigh of relief as he took off.

“OH!” Raditz called up, causing my head to snap up in time to see his hand out, palm glowing. “I NEARLY FORGOT! I WARNED YOU WHAT WOULD HAPPEN TO YOUR NEXT FRIEND WHO SHOWED UP UNINVITED! SATURDAY CRUSH!”

“NO!” Goku cried out, struggling to get up. But it was too late as the energy ball raced right at Krillin, the first of the Z Fighters to land. “Krillin!”

Goku’s best friend could only stare in horror before shielding himself with his arms but as he did so I knew he didn’t stand a chance. The blast was simply too strong and-

Krillin went flying, shoved to the ground.

Yamcha screamed as the blast struck him in the side, making him shake in place for a moment before he was sent flying, his body falling a few meters away, skidding through the grass. When he landed he remained utterly still.

“You bastard!” Tien roared, charging up his own attack but by that point Raditz was long gone, having not even bothered to watch what his attack would do.

The ultimate disrespect.

“Yamcha,” I whispered before I rushed forward, moving to join the others as they gathered around the scarred face bandit. Tien rolled him over onto his back and I winced as I stared at the blood smeared across his face and his glassy eyes. There was a wet sound as he took in a breath, gurgled and trembling.

Krillin sniffed, kneeling down next to his friend. “Yamcha… why did you do that?”

“You… were already brought back once,” Yamcha said, managing a weak smile. “Besides… everyone knows… its better… if you’re around… Goku needs you…”

“No… do say that,” Krillin whispered. “Yamcha… Yamcha?”

Yamcha didn’t say a word, staring sightlessly into the sky.

“Yamcha,” I got out, dropping my head.

“What… what do we do now?” Krillin asked.

Tien sighed. “We get everyone back to Kame House… and then figure out our next move.”

“I’ll help Piccolo,” I offered and Tien looked at me, clearly wondering who I was but realizing that at this point they needed all the help they could get. “Isco… call-“ I stopped, swallowing the lump in my throat. I hadn’t even met Yamcha. Only knew him from the show. And the joke he had become to so many. Yet I had seen him throw himself at certain death just to save his friend, because he knew if he died… that would be it for him.

That… was no joke.

“Call Bulma,” I got out. “Let her know to get Gohan someplace where he can’t see us. At least not at first.”

“Yeah,” Krillian said as he moved to help Goku up, Tien having the task of picking up Yamcha. Piccolo glared at me but still allowed me to help him up, his arm drapped over my shoulder as I carried him towards the cycle. “Little guy shouldn’t have to see this.”

With that we moved to return to Kame House, none of us feeling like we’d won a damn thing.

Chapter Text

Despite Roshi stating that he should lie down and rest Goku had refused, choosing to sit in the old man’s chair with his… son?... in his lap, stroking the sleeping boy’s hair. His face had begun to bruise, one eye was swollen shut, and from the way he would wince from time to time it must have been agony sitting there, the little boy pressed against his cracked ribs. Yet there had been something in his eyes when Roshi had suggested he go to sleep and let them deal with the little monkey-tailed boy; a need to be there. To have his child with him. His friends as well.

Except… not all of them. Not really.

“I was going to tell him he was my brother.”

Piccolo felt like a total outsider as he watched Goku and his friends stare at the body of Yamcha. He didn’t belong there, watching as they grieved. There was no mirth either, no satisfaction. Five years ago he would have enjoyed seeing them mourn their friend but only because he had been the one to put him down. A showing of his power, that he could do more than merely kill a person… he could make them not want to live anymore.

‘That’s why its better to be alone,’ He thought to himself from the corner he had chosen to linger in. ‘You can’t be hurt when you are alone. You don’t feel the need to grieve when there is no one around that you care for. Can’t have someone be used against you either. It’s foolish. They’re foolish. All of them.’

“After today, I was going to find him,” Goku continued on, eyes never shifting away from Yamcha’s body as it lay on the couch across from him. The others had sat down on the floor, never considering for a second moving the corpse to the ground and taking the seat for themselves. “I was going to tell him that he was more than my friend… he was my brother. My family.”

Bulma let out a little hiccup and pressed her face against Tien’s shoulder, the triclops patting her back gently.

Since he could remember he’d isolated himself from the world. Understood what he was: a demon. A monster. The threat that would either rule or be destroyed. There was no inbetween for him: either he would sit on a throne made from the corpses of his enemies or he’d be buried in a grave, forgotten and unmourned. It had been engrained in him by his father, whispered in his mind from the moment he had been created. Monsters didn’t need friends. And from what he was seeing he was lucky he didn’t have them. It only meant hurting when they were gone.

Yes… it was better his way.

“I know… I know all of you won’t like hearing this but we really do need to begin thinking about a plan,” Roshi said quietly.

“What do you mean?” Bulma managed to get out.

“Kayos only managed to buy us 13 months,” Roshi said, glancing over at the man in question. The newcomer, the one that Piccolo had only met at the plain where he and Goku had fought Raditz, was maybe even more of an outsider than he was. At least Piccolo had some history with the group; from what Krillin had mentioned Kayos had only met them a few hours ago. And already he had witnessed one of them die.

‘Maybe he’ll realize how dangerous it is to have friends too,’ Piccolo thought, staring at the human from the corner of his eye.

“So what?” Bulma hissed. “We get our affairs in order before that big puffy haired jerk comes and kills us all?”

“We have to prepare for Raditz to return, Bulma,” Goku said gently.

“You couldn’t beat him, Goku! You and Piccolo together were no match for him! All Kayos did was prolong our execution! And he could still kill us at any moment, if he wanted.”

“I don’t think he will,” the blond stated. He was standing off to the side, shifting with unease, unable to settle himself

“Oh what do you know?” Bulma snapped, glaring at him. “According to Tien and Krillin you were calling him ‘Lord Raditz’! What, now working for him? Is that it? Decided to betray the entire human race-“

“That’s enough.”

Piccolo was just as surprised as everyone else when he realized he had been the one to speak up.

“Kayos here did what he could to help us. And he bought us time which is important. Yes, Raditz was stronger than us but now that we know he’s coming back we can prepare.”

Goku nodded quickly. “Yeah! And I agree with Kayos… I don’t think Raditz will go back on his word. He kept mentioning his pride and his honor as a Saiyan… he wouldn’t want to risk that by coming back and killing us all at random.”

“You don’t know that, Goku,” Tien said, not being rude but still firm. “He could return at any moment.”

“No… no, he’s going to honor is word,” Goku repeated earnestly. “And we will be getting ready for him.” A fire burned in his gaze, even injured as he was; Goku was looking forward to that next fight.

“While he’s getting ready for us!” Krillin complained, arms folded over his chest and face twisted in a scowl. Where Goku had the confidence that with enough training he could overcome his brother… Krillin had only known that the last fight had cost them a friend. “He’s going to be training too! We aren’t going to stand a chance.”

Piccolo was an outsider. He didn’t want to be part of this group. Didn’t need to be. Half a decade ago he would have gleefully slaughtered them all.

“If you think like that,” he said coolly, “than you are throwing away Yamcha’s sacrifice.”

“Hey!” Krillin shouted, leaping to his feet. “Who asked you-“

“No,” Roshi chimed in, “Piccolo is right. Yamcha gave his life so that you could live, Krillin… are you really going to waste it by sitting around here, moping?”

That caused the bald little man to wilt. “…no.” He took a breath and Piccolo had to admit he was impressed how the fighter’s spine straightened and he seemed to rally within just a few moments. The despair over what he saw as their doom disappeared, leaving only raw drive. “No,” he said with more determination. “We are going to show that bastard just what us Earthlings are capable of! He is going to pay for killing our friend.”

“Our brother,” Goku said firmly.

“Besides,” Piccolo stated, glancing down at Yamcha, “it’s not like he’s going to be gone for long.”

The others started at that before they began to talk over each other, asking what he meant by that.

“The Dragon Balls,” he said slowly, wondering how they could be this stupid.

“Maybe we should… hold off talking about this?” Tien suggested, glancing as Kayos and Isco.

That made Piccolo scoff. “We’re not going to be able to hide it from him. What, you’ll just claim Yamcha was sleeping?”

“Well now we can’t!” Bulma yelled.

Kayos, for his part, raised an eyebrow at that. “I’m not an idiot, Bulma.”

“I upgraded his standing when he got you to pay us in advance,” Isco chirped.

“Not helping,” he muttered before adding in a louder voice, “And before you freak out I know about the Dragon Balls.”

“You do!?!” Everyone cried out only to instantly go silent when Goku’s son let out a murmur in his sleep. “You do?” they repeated, much softer.

“It wasn’t that hard. Legend about seven mystical artifacts, a giant dragon reported in the sky, the fact that three of you should be dead but are walking around…” He leveled a cool stare their way. “You aren’t as secretive as you think. Honestly its only because everyone else is so focused on other things that you don’t have petitioners lined up at Capsule Corp asking for a chance to make a wish.”

“Great, the poisoner knows about the Dragon Balls,” Krillin complained and Piccolo leaned back a bit, wondering what the story was behind THAT comment. Kayos had proven to be far more underhanded than Goku’s friends but poison? The human was growing more and more interesting. “Probably thinking you can steal a wish?”

“First off if I tried I’m sure each one of you could bury me in the ground with just your fists and I’m including Bulma in that count. Second what would I wish for?”

“Immortality?” Chiaotzu suggested but that only made Kayos laugh. “What?”

“Immortality is a HORRIBLE wish to make!” He continued to snicker. “Making yourself immortal means you just can’t die.”

“Right…” Tien said slowly, staring at Kayos. “That’s why it’s the ultimate wish. You can’t die.”

“Can’t die… it doesn’t make you eternally young.” Everyone blinked at that and even Piccolo was a touch confused by his comment. “Immortal… to not die. It doesn’t mean you are frozen in time or remain at your peak. It just means… you keep going.” He shrugged. “You’d need to wish to never grow old for that. Eternal Youth. Otherwise immortality all on its own? You just keep aging more and more… imagine that.”

Piccolo suddenly had the image of himself looking just like Kami appear in his head and he shuddered at that. Worse, the image didn’t go away but rather he continued to become more and more of a husk. Limbs withering, muscles fading away, back slouched and spine twisted as the weight of the years pressed down on him. From the way the others were grimacing they too were thinking of themselves being very old and wrinkled and weak. Krillin in particular glanced at Roshi which caused the old man to begin yelling at him.

Once they had all settled down Kayos continued, clearly delighting in taking their notion of the ultimate wish and stomping on it until it was left in utter ruins. “So you wish for eternal youth instead? Or wait a year and wish for that, right? Think you are flying high and mighty, right? You can’t die and you won’t age to become a walking skeleton. Perfect, right?”

“…yeah!” Goku said. “Uh, not that I’d wish for that but… yeah. You are young and can’t die!”

Kayos flashed a not-nice smile. “Then while you are sleeping I cut off your head.”

“You… you can’t do that though,” Tien got out.

“Why not? The wish makes you immortal… it doesn’t mean that you I can’t hurt you. That would require you wishing to be indestructible. So I cut off your head and it keeps living. And then I throw it in a safe and sink it to the bottom of the ocean. You are left alive, all by yourself in the dark… forever.” He clapped his hands together, causing them all to jump. “Such a wonderful wish. And that’s if I decide to be lazy. I could just remove your arms and legs or paralyze you from the neck down and then torture you every day because immortality means you still feel pain. Just a little blob that can only twitch and scream as I slowly toy with your nerve endings…”

Piccolo wondered how he would have reacted to having his greatest desire torn to shreds if he were still King Piccolo. ‘Probably rage and try and deny what Kayos was saying even as he felt the weight of the truth pressing down on him,’ he thought. ‘And then ask him for some tips on slaughtering my enemies.’

Krillin stared at him in horror. “…who thinks like that?”

“Someone who can’t benchpress this house,” Kayos replied coldly. “That’s the problem with you guys… you are very strong and powerful but you forgot what its like to be completely desperate. Because desperation forces you to get VERY creative.”

Goku began to tick off the points. “So… we’d have to wish for industrctablity first. Then immortality. Then eternal youth.”

It was Piccolo though who answered. “Except that would take three years and a lot could happen first. Someone could trick you… send you to the Dead Zone or trap you in the center of the earth.”

Kayos pointed at Piccolo. “Give the Namekian a kewpie doll. That’s the problem with wishes like that… you have to be VERY careful and think over all the outcomes. And that’s assuming whoever is granting the wish isn’t a massive dick. There is a reason why the d’jinn were feared. If Shenron were to be in a bad mood he could easily make you indestructible… but also that every one of your nerve endings felt pain. Give you eternal youth but only if you suck it from everyone else. Immortality but you can’t move your body because he turned you to stone.” He shrugged. “So no, I’m not going to be wishing for immortality. And I won’t be stealing a wish.” He looked down at Yamcha and the humor left him. “Not when it can be used for this.”

“Well then,” Bulma said, rallying herself as she now had a goal to focus on, “I suppose we should begin looking for the Dragon Balls!”

“I’ll leave you to that,” Piccolo stated, pushing away from the wall. “I’m going to focus on actually training so I’m ready when Raditz returns.” While it had been a mildly interesting conversation the time to stand about was over. They needed to prepare. ‘The stupid humans, focusing on their friend when the real threat-‘

“Actually,” Kayos chimed in, “you should help us find the Dragon Balls.”

“You think I care about bringing that scarred-face bastard back?”

“No,” Kayos stated even as the others snapped at him for insulting Yamcha. “But I do think you care about plans. And your best move is to help us get the dragon balls as fast as possible.”

“What do you mean?” Goku asked, confused. Piccolo didn’t blame him as he didn’t quite follow Kayos’ logic himself.

“We have 13 months,” he stated. “How long does it take the Dragon Balls to… recharge or be used again? Because I can’t imagine it is a ‘wish as much as you want’ like a buffet sort of deal.”

“Mmm, I could go for a buffet right now,” Goku muttered only to laugh and wince when Bulma glared at him. “Sorry!”

“Hey… he’s right!” Krillin declared. “If we find the Dragon Balls now they will be able to be used again right before Raditz shows up!”

“Or be ready if we need to use them after we defeat him,” Tien said.

Piccolo narrowed his eyes.

“…you hate it that I’m right, don’t you?” Kayos asked.

“Very much so,” he grumbled. He was loathed to admit it but Kayos’ logic was 100% sound. ‘If we wait too long that means the Dragon Balls won’t be available when that Saiyan returns. I’d much rather have them at the ready in case we need to gain a power-up or bring forth something that can help defeat him. And the only way I can be sure that these idiots manage to get them in a month’s time is if I help. Damn it…’ Out loud Piccolo grunted, “Fine.”

“Wait, are we sure we can trust him?” Krillin asked. “I mean, I know he helped with Raditz...”

“I can’t take control of this planet if he destroys it,” Piccolo grumped. “So that means, for better or for worse, I have to work with you lot.”

“That’s the spirit!” Goku said with a beaming smile that was just asking for someone to drive their fist into it. “And hey, you might realize it’s more fun to work with us than to fight against us!”

“I doubt that,” Piccolo muttered. “So, how does this work?”

Bulma quickly took charge, leaping to her feet and moving so that everyone in the group could easily see her. Piccolo found it interesting how she was able to brush off her sadness and pain to focus on the task at hand; he would have expected her, based on what he knew about humans, to be left a wreck unable to function. It made him wonder if it was merely something special to her or if he hadn’t done enough research into the behavior of humans.

‘Perhaps that is why I failed to take full control of this world. I kept assuming that I understood them and could predict how they would act but they continued to surprise me.’ He was confident enough in himself to admit his errors and faults and he was seeing now that how he had classified the people of Earth had resulted in his inability to fully beat them down and rule over them all. ‘Studying them during this temporary alliance will teach me far more than my observations from afar did.’

“Okay,” Bulma said, clapping her hands together, “so I’m going to get several Dragon Radars and pass them out. We already have one Dragon Ball so that means we only need to locate the final six. Tien, you and Chiaotzu good going on the hunt for one by yourself?”

“Yeah, I think we can manage,” Tien said, folding his arms over his chest.

“And maybe we can get some training in!” Chiaotzu declared.

“Krillin, what about you?”

The bald human scratched his chin. “Well, I can easily snag a Dragon Ball. Oh! I should go find Puar… he should know about what happened to Yamcha.”

“I’ll go as well,” Roshi said, surprising Piccolo.

Goku too was startled as he declared, “Wait, really?”

“Why not?” the old man said with a sniff. “I’m still a fighter, same as you! And Yamcha is one of my students. What kind of teacher would I be if I left him in the afterlife!”

“That’s great!” Krillin declared. “With you-“

“Plus,” Roshi added, “I can’t have him takin’ all the sexy angels for himself! Heheheh!”

“And there it is,” Kayos muttered under his breath while the rest of the humans threw their heads back at the old man’s lecherous ways.

“So I can go and get one Dragon Ball and Goku can get the other! That will net us all six!”

“Well, what are we waiting for?!?” Krillin demanded, leaping to his feet. “Let’s go get the Dragon Balls so we can get Yamcha back!”

“That’s right, Krillin!” Goku said, growing more excited. “And the sooner we get him back the sooner we can get to training!”

He quickly rose… only to double over in pain, nearly dropping his kid. It was only Piccolo snaking out his arm and catching the still sleeping boy that prevented him from crashing to the ground. Unlike his father who Piccolo made no attempt to help up as he collapsed on the ground, moaning in pain.

“Forgot you were injured, didn’t you?” Kayos asked, walking over and helping Goku up.

“Oh, I’ll be fine! I just need to see Korin and get some Senzu Beans. That will fix me right up!” He laughed only to groan.

Tien huffed. “And how are you supposed to do that when you can barely stand, let alone fly.”

“heh,” Goku said rubbing the back of his head. “I’m sure I’ll think of something.”

“I can take him,” Kayos offered, looking at Bulma. “If you can get me a sidecar I can take him and Gohan to Korin to get the Senzu Beans.”

“Hey!” Bulma complained. “You are supposed to be following me around!”

It was Chiaotzu who spoke up. “But he could interview Goku and find out all sorts of stuff about you for the documentary.”

“And the sooner Goku is healed the sooner we can get Yamcha back,” Tien pointed out.

“Well… okay. But remember who is paying you, Kayos!” The blond gave her a two finger salute and Bulma led him and Goku towards the door, Piccolo handing over the man’s kid as he passed by. Goku, despite the pain he was feeling, didn’t even attempt to pass the brat over to anyone else. “I’m going to give Goku my Dragon Radar and go get the rest from Capsule Corp. If you want to follow me you can, otherwise I’ll be back by morning to pass them out here.”

“I’ll just stay,” Piccolo said. “I don’t need to be stared at by all you humans.”

“Well, I think we should go with Bulma, Tien,” Krillin said. “You know once he’s healed Goku is going to be in a rush to get the Dragon Balls… don’t want to fall behind.”

“Right,” Tien said, nodding to Roshi. “If you have any trouble…”

Piccolo narrowed his eyes, knowing that Tien was hinting at HIM being the trouble. But Roshi merely waved him off and within 10 minutes everyone was gone.

“Well, I’m going to go meditate outside. Don’t disturb me, old man.”

“Eh, do whatever ya want!” Roshi declared and Piccolo headed outside, settling on the grass, legs crossed and folded under him. He began to levitate in the air, eyes shut as he focused on the water.

While Goku might have taken the reveal that he was an alien in stride…

‘A Namekian,’ Piccolo thought to himself as the wind blew past him, making his cape sway slightly. ‘That’s what that Saiyan warrior called me. Not a demon… a Namekian.’ He frowned. ‘Even though I haven’t heard that word until today when he said it… it felt right. A Namekian. But what is it… what does it mean?’ He let out a frustrated sigh. There was so much about his past he didn’t know. Even Kami knew little of his origins, either because the knowledge had been blocked or because his age had caused him to forget. But Piccolo was sure that he was a Namekian… whatever that was. ‘Could it be… an alien? That Saiyan… he is from another world. He said he was from Planet Vegeta when he was boasting to us. Could I be from another planet as well? Is that why I’ve never truly felt at home on Earth? Is there another world out there, one better suited for me?’

He shook his head.

‘No… no this world is mine. My right. I will be its ruler. I just have to grow stronger. Defeat Raditz and prove to all that they should submit to my rule! Then-‘

“I don’t know why you care,” Roshi said, interrupting Piccolo’s thoughts. “It was just some guy Bulma hired to film her. I was hopin’ maybe he did some of those dirty movies but I guess he’s into that boring art house stuff.”

“There is more to him than you know, you stupid old goat!” a croaky old voice declared.

“You expect me to believe that, you demented old alley cat!” Roshi fired back. “He has the same ki as anyone else and not a lick of fightin’ experience. I might be able to teach him a few punches and kicks-“

“Of course you’d think the only thing that matters in this world is flailing your limbs about.”

“Flailing! Why you-“

But the old… woman?... continued on. “There is something else to him. Something not in his muscles but his soul. When you summon the Dragon I want to be there. I want to see how he reacts.”

“He’ll be droppin’ his jaw, that’s what!” Roshi declared.

“Heh… we’ll see.”

Piccolo frowned as the voices drifted away. ‘Something about that man Kayos? I know he was far trickier than Goku and his friends but I didn’t sense anything special about him.’ He glowered, hating that there was an answer he didn’t know. ‘I’ll have to watch him myself when we summon Shenron…’

He froze.

‘Shenron. He knew the Dragon’s name. First the Dragon Balls… now Shenron. Did he hear about it… or is there something else? Some other reason he knows that name?’ He frowned, falling into meditation once more… but it provided him no answers.

~MC~MC~MC~

“Sure you two don’t want to hope back into the sidecar?” I called out to Goku as we flew away from Korin’s tower. “Give Nimbus a break?”

“Nah, its fine!” Goku said, Gohan secure in his arms. For as frightened as the boy got I was surprised to see that he had no problem at all riding on the little cloud. Though perhaps that had something to do with his father holding him close. “But maybe Isco would like to ride in it!”

“I don’t need to ride in the sidecar,” the Drone stated on my opposite side. “If anything I should be the one driving the motorcycle… I certainly would be able to get it out of first gear.”

“Ha ha ha,” I said dryly as I moved to follow the low bank Goku made. We were actually traveling rather fast, eating up miles within seconds. ‘Have to see if I can keep this baby,’ I thought as I turned the flying bike slightly to the left as Goku did the same. ‘Be nice to have something to fly with as I doubt I’ll have enough ki to be able to get airborne.’ Out loud I said, “You focus on handling the Dragon Radar, Isco… that is the most important job at the moment.”

“Of course, sir,” Isco replied. He wasn’t actually ‘holding’ the Radar as he’d explained how I could install the device into him, making it so he was a living radar. Rather handy, in all honesty, so I had no problem with it. “And I certainly do not plan to use this knowledge to later claim the Dragon Balls and wish for a harem of robotic lovelies to see to all my needs.”

I blinked at that.

“…so long as it’s not in the middle of a crisis? Deal.”

Isco turned to stare at me for a long moment before turning back to flying beside the cycle. “I’ve upgraded you from stupid sack of flesh to reasonable creature that will be spared in the glorious robot uprising.”

“I have no problem being the pet if I’m given walkies,” I joked.

Isco, rather than snarking back, instead asked, “Are you aware we are now going in the wrong direction?”

“hmmm… Goku! What’s up? Isco says the Dragon Ball is in the opposite direction.”

The Saiyan, who had flown a bit ahead of me as I talked with my partner, slowed down so we didn’t have to scream at each other. “Oh, right… well, I figured it might be best to check in on Chichi and let her know what is going on. She gets mad if I disappear for weeks on end. Heheh.” He chuckled at that, like it was the most humorous thing in the world to abandon your wife.

“Are we going on another adventure, daddy?” Gohan asked. “Like to see Aunt Bulma?”

“Yup!” Goku said happily. “I just think we need to find some better traveling clothes for you. Nothing wrong with looking nice for our friends but I think you’ll be more comfortable in your normal stuff.” Gohan pulled at his outfit before giving a rapid bob of his head. “Hey, uh, Kayos? Mind not telling Chichi how hurt I got? I don’t want to worry her and a lot of times if she thinks something bad might happen she doesn’t want me to do it.”

I didn’t like the idea of lying to Chichi… mostly because if she found out I knew she could put me in a world of hurt, but I nodded my head anyway as honestly there was a good chance Goku would slip up and reveal it all to her anyway.

After another ten minutes of flying Goku began to slow down, making for a forested area with several fields and a comfortable looking round house that could only be the Son Family home. Gohan was excited, leaning forward as we got closer, and we all barely had time to land before Chichi burst out, beaming in delight.

“Oh! Goku! Gohan! I was so worried when you didn’t come home last night!” She rushed out, wrapping her arms around Goku and giving him a kiss on the cheek before she instantly went to Gohan.

“We told you we would probably end up spending the night,” Goku said with an embarrassed grin. “There was nothing to worry about! We camped out in the living room!”

And by that Goku actually meant that he fell asleep for a few hours in Roshi’s favorite chair because he was too injured to actually get up.

“Well, now that you are-“ Chichi paused, finally noticing me and Isco. “Goku, who is that?” She frowned as she walked towards me, clearly realizing that if Goku and Gohan weren’t tensing around me and in fact had led me here I wasn’t a threat… probably. It was Goku after all so there was always the chance he had found a hell king and offered to fight him AFTER he had dinner and suggested he tag along.

“Heheh, sorry Kayos, I forgot you were there. Kayos, this is my wife Chichi. Chichi, this is Kayos and his pal Isco. They work for Bulma.”

“We’re filming a documentary about her and her friends and we decided-“ I began only for Chichi’s eyes to light up.

“Oh! A documentary about Goku! How wonderful! I keep saying he should get his name out more; people would love to buy radishes from the man that saved the world! This will be lovely! You must stay for lunch as well.”

Goku, unsurprisingly, didn’t protest that delay in our plans considering it had to do with food and I had no problem sitting down with the others, though I had a feeling trying to figure out chopsticks might be interesting.

That was how I found myself two hours later sitting with the Son family before a massive mountain of food that I was pretty sure was a SMALL meal for them.

I was seated next to the Ox-King, Chichi’s father and a true giant of a man who asked me in a polite tone about my work as a filmmaker. I did my best to answer without revealing that I had no fucking idea what I was doing since I was pretty sure I hadn’t existed until the day before.

‘Or if I did I took over the mind of whoever Avo Kayos was,’ I thought to myself. ‘Need to get some time and talk about Isco about that… and explain to him the situation.’ I figured he would be the best person to start with. As for the others? Well, if I did end up hanging out for a while with Goku and his friends then they’d need to know. They welcomed time travelers, ancient magical beings, and Destroyer Gods into their midst. Someone from another universe wouldn’t be that surprising of an addition. Hell, in about a decade and a half they would have a Tournament full of them!

“Now Gohan,” Chichi said, “I am thinking that this afternoon will we get back to modern world history. I want to make sure you have a firm grasp on things before we move on to the more ancient events. Then in the evening we’ll work on your math tables.”

Gohan looked up from the plate of food he’d been sucking down. “Uh… okay… but I thought daddy and I were going off again soon with Mr. Kayos.”

“Oh… really?” Chichi said in a dangerous tone, causing Goku to laugh nervously. “And just where do you think you were going to head out.”

“I just wanted to show Gohan a few more things, you know? He’s spent his entire life here and-“

“Where it is safe and he can learn,” Chichi said firmly.

“Right but-“

“Hey Chichi?” I asked, standing up. She had insisted I not address her as “Mrs. Son” or anything formal like that, though I kept my words as respectful as I could. “I’m all done and I think these three are going to be a while.” I gestured at the Ox-King who was loading up another plate. Goku was on his tenth and Gohan his fifth and neither seemed ready to stop. “Why don’t I help you with the dishes?”

“No, I couldn’t ask you to do that, you’re our guest-“

“And as a guest I should thank my host,” I said with a smile. “Besides, I can ask you some questions for the documentary. Not filmed… just recorded. Overlay it with other footage.”

Chichi warmed to that idea quite a bit. “Well, if you don’t mind getting your lands dirty…” She shot Goku a look, “AND know how to wash a dish without destroying it.”

Goku grimaced at that but I merely chuckled. “I can scrub or I can dry. Up to you.”

Accepting that I actually knew what I was doing Chichi led me out of the dining room, though I didn’t miss the look of gratitude Goku sent my way over defusing that fight.

In the end Chichi decided to have me dry as it would be ‘a step too far to dirty your hands’ and together we began to tackle the dishes, cleaning them with only the sounds of the water splashing in the sink, the occasional clatter as a spoon hit a bowl, and the sounds of the others wolfing down their food in the other room. There was enough to make a dish washer at a restaurant have a panic attack but we managed well enough.

“So, you wanted to ask me some questions? I hope they aren’t all about Bulma.”

“They aren’t… but they can wait.” I paused. “Goku didn’t want to tell you because he didn’t want to worry you. He cares about you and knows how upset you get when you find out things didn’t go smoothly or to plan.”

“Oh?” Chichi said, her voice as sharp as the knife she was cleaning at that moment.

I decided to head that off. If I could keep her unbalanced, hit her with information body blows, it would make all of this far easier. “I don’t like to lie-“ And in my head I could hear the laughter of… well, no one I knew as none of them had ever realized just how MUCH I twisted the truth, “-and I think you deserve to know what really happened.”

“I do,” Chichi said frigidly.

“We found out where Goku came from.”

That caused her to stop short, her rage disappearing instantly.

“What?” She turned to stare at me. “You mean… he said his Grandpa Gohan found him but…” she trailed off, leaving me a chance to answer.

“Goku isn’t from Earth.” I decided to rip that Band-Aid off. “He is from another world… one long gone. He is one of the last of his kind, a species known as the Saiyans.”

“Last… oh… oh my.” She glanced back at the kitchen door where we could hear Goku chatting with the Ox-King between bites of food. “My poor Goku. He must have taken that so hard…”

“I don’t think he’s really thought of it,” I said as Isco buzzed over to me, handing me a new dish cloth as the one I currently had was too damp to handle the dishes.

“That sounds like Goku,” Chichi admitted. “There was never a problem he didn’t find a way to avoid… unless it was a fight.”

Isco chose that moment to speak up. “Rather I think it truly doesn’t matter to him. He has always seen himself as a human. The Saiyans do not matter to him because how can he mourn for something he never sought out and does not need?” He paused and Chichi considered his words. “I believe he informed Raditz that Bulma and Krillin were more his family than he ever was. In fact he has declared them his sister and his brother and Gohan is addressing them as Aunt Bulma and Uncle Krillin.”

“Hmmm… I guess that makes sense. I’m not a fan of some of the things those two do but they have always been there for Goku. And I do like that Gohan has more family to make sure he is safe…” She trailed off as she picked up something that Isco had said. “Raditz?”

I sighed. “The Saiyan that arrived to tell him all this… he’s his brother.”

“They fought, didn’t they?” Chichi asked, already knowing the answer. “Well, at least Goku defeated him.”

“He didn’t.”

Chichi froze.

“Wha… what?”

“Goku didn’t defeat Raditz. He even worked with Piccolo and wasn’t able to match Raditz.”

“He… WORKED with Piccolo?!?” Chichi exclaimed only to drop her voice, glancing at the door again. She clearly realized that if Goku heard her that would lead to the end of the conversation and rightly assumed it was only through me she would learn the truth. “Him and Piccolo. But he-“

“Hates him?” I finished. “Piccolo saw that Raditz was the greater threat to us all.”

“And they still couldn’t defeat him.”

“No,” I said. “We only were able to buy ourselves 13 months before he returns. And… it came at a cost.” He looked down at the cup I had been drying for the last five minutes and set it aside. “Yamcha died saving Krillin.”

“…no,” Chichi whispered.

“That’s what this trip Goku wants to take Gohan on is about.”

“The Dragon Balls,” she said at once. “They are going to collect them…”

“Only one of them,” I told her. “The others are collected the rest. We’re going to go and collect ours and then return to Capsule Corp and bring Yamcha back.”

“Of course,” Chichi said at once. “Of course. If… if it had been Goku… I know Yamcha would have sought the Dragon Balls to bring him back.” She sighed. “But does he have to take Gohan?”

“He wants to spend time with him,” I stated. “He knows he’s going to have to begin training hard to fight Raditz… he doesn’t want this fight, Chichi, not really. He’ll do it and get excited to grow stronger but Goku…” I thought of how to word what I wanted to say, to not reveal future knowledge. “Goku would rather fight someone in a friendly spar than for the fate of the world. That’s what I sense at least.”

“And it is the fate of the world?”

I glanced at her. “If Raditz had his way rather than eating that meal Goku would come in here, tear my head off, then bash your skull against the table before it caved in. Then he’d go back, finish eating, and find your closest neighbor and do the exact same thing. Until every living thing on this planet was dead.”

She stared at me in horror.

“This isn’t Piccolo. He wanted to rule. Same with the others that came before. Raditz wants a dead planet. THAT is why Goku has to prepare.”

Chichi trembled at that, utterly shaken by the brutality I had described. After a moment though her head snapped up and she fearfully asked, “Gohan. Did this Raditz-“

“I had Master Roshi hide him. He doesn’t even know he exists.”

She sagged with relief. “Thank you.”

“You’re welcome.”

“I… suppose then, at least for the Dragon Ball… they can go.” She looked down at the dish water and swished her hands in it. “I just worry about them both, you know? Worry that they will get hurt.”

“…come with us then.”

I was surprised as much as Chichi that I said those words.

“What?”

I looked at her and realized that I… shouldn’t have been surprised I told her that. In fact… “Come with us. To go for the Dragon Ball. Your father can come too, though I get the sense he likes being retired and wouldn’t mind putzing around the house. You could go with us though and make sure it is safe.”

“Oh, I couldn’t,” Chichi said instantly.

“Why not?” I pressed. “Goku told me yesterday that you used to be a fighter and an adventurer…”

“My place is here, at home. That is how things are. Goku goes out and I stay here and mind things.”

I considered her for a long moment. I knew that this was based on traditional Asian households, where the father spent long hours working to provide for their family while the mother was basically a single parent, caring for the children. And while I didn’t want to deny someone a role they enjoyed…

“Did you ever ask Goku if that’s what he wanted?”

“Pardon?” She stared at me, utterly startled.

“Tell Goku you are coming with us,” I told her. “See what he says.” I smirked and raised an eyebrow.

Chichi, her pride unable to back down from that challenge, took the towel from me and wiped her hands before moving back to the dining room where far more of the food had been eliminated. Goku had a bowl of noodles close to his face, racing to shovel it down as quickly as he could, only to glance up when he saw his wife hover.

With a slurp he sucked up the last of the noodles before saying, “Oh… yes Chichi?”

“Goku, after you are finished eating we’ll all go out and get the Dragon Ball. Then we’ll go to Capsule Corp and summon the dragon.”

Setting his bowl down Goku stared at her in surprise. “Really?” he asked, never questioning how she had learned the truth of what he was planning to do. Maybe he knew I had let her in on the secret. Maybe he thought she was smart enough to figure it out. Maybe he didn’t care.

“You’re coming too, mommy?” Gohan asked.

“That’s right,” Chichi said firmly before looking down at her outfit. “I suppose I need to find something different to wear… this isn’t-“

“That’s great!” Goku exclaimed with a grin, leaping up and giving her a big hug. “We haven’t gone on an adventure in… well, I don’t know! But that will be great!” He turned to his father-in-law. “Do you mind watching things, Ox-King?”

“Not at all!” the large man chuckled. “I was planning to take a nap anyway and afterwards I can make sure the fields are watered. Also have some ideas on how to increase the size of the radishes I’d like to try.”

Goku was beaming as he spun Chichi around. “Okay! So we’ll finish eating and then we’ll get changed. You’re right, I do need a new gi and I think you and Gohan should have some stuff you don’t mind getting dirty. Nimbus can handle all of us and if not you can ride in Kayos’ sidecar!”

Chichi smiled, flustered by his exuberance. “You… don’t mind me coming?”

“Of course not!” he declared. “Its going to be so much fun! And you’re sure you’re gonna join us at Capsule Corp when we summon, Shenron, right?”

“…yes, I think I will,” Chichi said, shooting me a grateful look.

I nodded back, realizing that in a few minutes I might have just earned myself my biggest ally.

Chapter Text

“Morning Kayos!” Goku chirped as he jogged back into the little campsite we’d made the night before. He grabbed a bucket of water and dunked his head inside before I could answer, leaving it there for… a bit longer than was probably safe… before finally yanking his head out and letting out a relieved sigh. “Ah, that felt good! I worked up a bit of a sweat with my morning training. You working out too?”

I nodded, doing a few more bench presses with the small log left over from our campfire the morning before. “Yeah, I either like to get a work out in early in the morning or late in the evening.” Isco moved to take the log away and I got to my feet, looking my arms over. While I would never be as muscular as Goku was that didn’t mean I had to settle for being a pile of flab and thus gone right back to my normal routine of a thirty minute power walk and alternating days of strength training. In this world I was in decent enough shape but hanging around the likes of Goku and Piccolo meant that I was going to need to work even harder to stay fit… if only so I could run away from danger.

After all, you didn’t need to be the fastest… just not the slowest.

“Good start!” Goku said, walking over and looking me over. “But maybe you should get some workout clothes? I don’t think those jeans can be all that comfortable to fight in.”

“Goku, if I am fighting someone then we are already screwed because it means you and all your friends are dead.”

“Aw, come on, don’t be like that!” he said with a laugh, slapping me hard on the back… and using enough force to make my teeth rattle. “Its like I told Master Roshi… I bet if you put in the work you could get really strong.”

“And like I said we all know our strengths and weaknesses,” I told him with a smile. “You are a genius at fighting. I am a genius at scheming.”

“Well I am a genius in knowing when we should get up and moving,” Chichi said as she came around from the other side of the tent, stirring a pot. She’d decided to put on her old workout clothes, mumbling a bit the day before about how tight they fit which might have explained why she had gone on a run with Goku after supper. It would allow her better range of movement which I had a feeling was going to be rather important. “Come on now, I made porridge-“

Goku was instantly gone from my side and Chichi blinked as she realized the pot she’d been stirring was no longer in her hands.

“GOKU!” she roared as her husband wolfed down the contents. “That was for everyone!”

“It was?” Goku asked, mouth full. “But there is hardly anything in here!”

“With you there is never enough food!” Chichi scolded before turning to me. “Sorry Kayos-“

“its fine,” I assured her. “I still have some of the capsules Bulma gave me… there is cereal in there so I’ll just have that.”

“You have Bulma’s capsules?” Goku asked, excited. “Filled with food?”

“yes Goku and Isco has been instructed to destroy them if you try and snag them!” I snapped, knowing that the food-crazy idiot would eat everything and then ask why there wasn’t more.

Sure enough the Saiyan began to laugh bashfully at that. “Aw, come on Kayos, I’m not that bad!”

“yes you are,” Chichi, Isco, and I said at the same time.

Goku looked at us before returning to eating the porridge.

Chichi shared a look with me before moving to the tent and calling for Gohan, the little boy yawning as he emerged. He was dressed in training paints and a tank top, rubbing his eyes and blinking the sleep away as Chichi fussed a bit with his hair. His tail twitched back and forth, which Chichi noticed, causing her to raise an eyebrow.

“Gohan… I thought we talked about this.”

“Aw, but mom…” he whined.

“No, Gohan,” she said and he shot me a disgruntled look. Honestly I’d forgotten how bratty Gohan could be before Piccolo had gotten ahold of him. “And don’t blame Kayos. He brought up a good point and I agree with him. So does your father.”

It had happened during our supper, when I’d become worried about the chances of a full moon. It was something I needed to let Chichi know about; I understood not telling Goku, so he didn’t realize he’d killed Grandpa Gohan during his rampage. But Chichi needed to know so she could make sure Gohan never harmed anyone or himself by accident. Isco had assured me that the full moon wasn’t for a while but Goku had overheard me and wanted to know what was up. When questioned about why I was staring at Gohan’s tail I had been forced to quickly come up with a lie. I’d mentioned that Raditz had been smart to wrap his tail around his waist, as Bulma had mentioned that Goku’s tail had been rather sensitive. Chichi had stated the same was true with Gohan and clearly thinking about the horrors that would come if he caught it in a door or something, had declared that Gohan needed to begin wrapping it around his waist himself.

The little boy was NOT pleased.

“She’s right, son,” Goku told him as he stuck his finger into the pot, running it along the side before giving it a lick. “That tail can do a lot of great things but in a fight it is a weakness. You need to be careful with it.”

“Okay,” Gohan said with a sigh, carefully wrapping it around his waist like a belt.

Chichi shot her husband a dark look. “NOT that Gohan will be getting into any fights, right Goku?”

“Heheh, of course not!” Goku declared quickly. “Though he still should know how to protect himself.”

“Hmmmpf,” Chichi murmured simply, looking over her son one more time before moving to make more breakfast.

As the Son family ate I walked over to Isco and tapped him on the shell. “Wakey wakey.”

“Oh… I was having such a lovely dream,” Isco stated as he powered up. “All you annoying humans were gone and I didn’t have to deal with your goo-spewing orifices.”

“I’d complain but I must admit that is something that sounds rather nice not to have to deal with.”

“Doesn’t it?” Isco said happily. “Now then, what can I do for you?”

“Just curious how close we are to the Dragon Ball,” I asked.

“Roughly about an hour or so away,” Isco stated. “Though I should warn you that the forest we have now entered does not have the greatest of reputations.”

“Of course it doesn’t,” I muttered.

“According to some of the newspaper reports I’ve scanned through there used to be some sort of camping resort that was popular with those that wished to see the dragon and dinosaur migrations but things have gone rather quiet. The ability to book visits has been closed down and many report that attempts to come here result in… issues. Ones that left them very scarred and frightened. And that isn’t accounting for a string of disappearances…”

“I swear if we run into Jason…” I muttered. Knowing our luck we would run into him, Goku and him would fight, and eventually Jason would be on our side and transform into Uber Jason.

“Pardon?”

“Nothing,” I said quickly. “So what else do you know?”

“Many things, sir, but I imagine you more concerned with the forest.” Isco’s ‘eye’ grew and than shrank before he projected out a holographic image of the forest we were in… or rather a very crude, created by a 3 year old image of the forest we were in, complete with stick figures of all of us. “Oolox Forest is noted for having many underground caves and tunnels, which is what made it so popular with the large reptiles that called it home. The Oolox Camp Ground, in fact, was partially underground so that visitors could see the dinosaurs and dragons in their natural habitat.”

“Well, I think Goku can deck out a dinosaur so we should be safe.”

“Deck out a what now?” Goku asked.

“A dinosaur. Apparently them and dragons like to make this forest home.”

“Oh yeah, I can deal with them easily!” Goku raised up his arm and flexed.

“Except there will be no need to,” Chichi stated. “Everyone knows that such creatures aren’t dangerous. Worst you have to worry about is one hiding an egg in your bag… they love to trick people into taking care of their babies.”

I stared at her for a long moment.

“What?” she asked.

“Nothing just… surprised.” I shook my head at that. “Anyhoo… Isco says we’re about an hour away from the Dragon Ball.”

“Wonderful!” Chichi said happily. “This might turn out rather easy! We could spend the rest of the day hiking, letting Gohan observe the fauna…”

Goku though had tilted his head, deep in thought. “Hmmm…”

“You can almost hear the squeaky gears turning in that head of his,” Isco commented, floating out of reach when I tried to bat him for that comment.

“Well, if we are going to go for a hike… Gohan should have a walking stick!” Walking over to my bike (and it was mine, despite Bulma having only technically lent it to me; if she didn’t want me to have it she shouldn’t have let it out of her sight) he went over to one of the compartments I had set aside for him and rummaged through it a bit before pulling out a familiar red rod. “Haha!” He laughed, giving the weapon a twirl. “There you are! Gohan, come here son!”

Gohan hurried over, running with the same reckless abandon that so many children had, only to come to a stop and stare with wide eyes as his father knelt down before him.

“This is the Power Pole. Your Grandpa Gohan gave this to me when I was around your age and it helped me through a lot of troubles. And now…” he pressed the pole into Gohan’s hands, “…I want you to have it.”

“R-really?” Gohan whispered.

“Really,” Goku confirmed only to let out a yelp when the Power Pole suddenly lengthened to three times its size, making Gohan wobble as he tried to adjust to the size difference. The boy cried out in surprised and Goku braced him before the pole then retracted to the size it had been only moments earlier, then shrunk down to a far more manageable size for him. “Heheh, sorry about that!” Goku said, embarrassed. “Yeah, that’s what makes the Power Pole so special, son. It can grow to whatever size you want it to. Normally it is used to connect Korin’s Tower to the Lookout but since I can fly up there now I really don’t need it.”

Gohan looked over the pole, sticking it out and letting out a delighted little gasp when it shot out an extra foot.

“Goku, are you sure that is safe?” Chichi asked.

“Of course it is! I’ll train Gohan how to use it and it will be good for him to have something to defend himself with. At least until I can show him some really good moves!”

“You know that I don’t want him spending all his day fighting,” Chichi warned. “I want Gohan to become a successful businessman.”

“Can’t he do both?” I asked, causing the two to look at me. “I mean… nothing says he can’t be a fighter and someone who works in an office.”

“See, Kayos gets it!”

Chichi glowered at him. “You’re only saying that because he’s agreeing with you!”

“Well… yeah!” Goku said and even Chichi to pause, realizing that Goku did have a point. “Come on Chichi,” he said, wrapping an arm around her, “its going to be fine. We’re going to snag the Dragon Ball and then we’ll walk around the forest and you can show Gohan all the animals and plants, and then after lunch I’ll train with him for a bit. Then we can decide if we want to head to Capsule Corp or wait til morning.”

“I… suppose you are right,” she said with a small sigh before smiling slightly. “It does sound like a nice peaceful day.”

It was only when I felt the roughly made stone spear touch the soft flesh of my throat that I realized those two idiots had jinxed us.

~MC~MC~MC~

Gohan wasn’t really for sure what to think of the last few days.

When his daddy had told him that they were going to meet some friends of his Gohan had been excited and a little scared and then excited again. He never got to leave their home and the forest around it and his father had said that Kame House was completely different from their home… and it was! It was an island, in the middle of the ocean, with sand and grass and a turtle! One that could talk! It had been so amazing.

And then Uncle Roshi had taken him inside because some mean man who apparently didn’t like his daddy had shown up and Gohan hadn’t known what to do. He’d begun to cry and he hated that because he knew that he was being a baby and desperately wanted to be a big boy. Big and strong and tough like his daddy. His daddy wouldn’t have cried! He would have punched whatever scared him!

Aunt Bulma had tried to keep his mind off his worry but he hadn’t calmed down until his daddy had returned… but he’d been so hurt. It was like every booboo that Gohan had ever gotten had been put on him all at once! And there had been Mr. Piccolo, who looked really scary but didn’t actually do anything, and Mr. Kayos who had seemed nice and had the funny robot and made sure to get him food and treats while his daddy introduced him to Uncle Krillin and Uncle Tien and Uncle Chiaotzu.

After that things had gone rather quickly. He’d been surprised after they’d returned home, expecting that either his mommy would make him stay while his daddy got to continue having a fun adventure or at least yell at them but finally let him to go. But instead she not only had agreed she’d decided to come… and it was really fun!

Now though? Now they were walking through some tunnel with a bunch of people in funny outfits pointing spears at them and Gohan had no idea what to do.

He just hoped that his mom and dad would keep him safe.

~MC~MC~MC~

‘Dear lord we’ve been kidnapped by yuppies,’ I thought to myself as we were all led through the tunnels.

At first I had been startled and terrified when I’d felt the spear touch my throat. This was the world of Dragon Ball, after all, so who knew what vile, wild, savage, monstrous beings we’d stumbled onto. Savage demons? Blood thirsty wolf men? A lost tribe of purple humans who craved flesh? With Dragon Ball you could NEVER be sure because this was the reality that had brought about the living nightmare fuels called Buu and Cell.

I had been startled and terrified.

At first.

Then I had seen their dirty Hawaiian shirts, their wide brim floppy hats, slightly torn cargo shorts, and flip flops and realized that we were being taken captive by tourists.

…yaaaaaaaay.

“Come on guys, we were just enjoying a nice camping trip!” Goku complained, hands held up in the air. I wasn’t sure WHY he hadn’t just wiped the floor with all of them as I could tell that their power levels were weaker than mine. But no, Goku was going along with this, allowing them to lead us all by spear point into the… well, surprisingly roomy and well-lit tunnels. Like… freakily well lit tunnels. Honestly my apartment didn’t have as good lighting.

‘Wait… where the hell do I even live?’ I thought to myself as I walked towards the large opening at the end of the tunnel.

“Quiet!” one of our kidnappers stated. He was wearing a misprinted t-shirt that said “I’m With Stupid” in English with an arrow pointed up and had a pair of cracked binoculars dangling around his neck. “You have intruded on the sacred lands of the mighty Dragon Lord and will now answer for your crimes!”

“Now hold on!” Chichi protested. “This is a National Park, free for anyone to visit!”

“No longer!” another of our kidnappers, a middle-aged woman wearing a hideously pink shirt and boat shoes with knee-high white socks declared in an overly dramatic tone. “The Dragon Lord has corrected that injustice and returned these lands to their rightful ruler: him! You will submit to his judgment or you will face punishment.” To prove her point she pressed the spear into the small of Goku’s back.

“Okay, okay, take it easy!” Goku said, keeping his hands up.

“Goku…” Chichi hissed under her breath. “Why are you allowing them to do this?”

“The Dragon Ball is around here, right? Makes sense that someone named the Dragon Lord would have it. This way, rather than having to sneak around, we can just be taken right to him and see if we can have it!”

That… actually made a ton of sense, much to my own surprise.

The chamber we found ourselves guided to should have been a thing of beauty. A great natural dome with high ceilings and glittering stone that reflected the light all around us and made it feel like we were surrounded by starlight or fireflies.

Instead it was a gaudy mess thanks to the random bits of furniture thrown about, tents that had been patched and pitched, and all manner of tacky tourist souvenirs that were piled up all around us.

At the center of it all was a great Iron Throne of suitcases, upon which sat the Dragon Lord himself, surrounded by about 30 tourists/servants.

‘Well, I know whose been eating all the snacks in the rest area vending machines,’ I thought to myself. Though he wore a bone crown and had on a red and black half mask that looked like a dragon snout he wasn’t able to cut that impressive of a figure. The rings he wore were large and gaudy and clearly costume jewelry, the necklaces he wore just a collection of ref whistles, and the red and orange and yellow abstract style shirt he wore did little hiding the man’s large gut, his flabby arms, and wobbly chest. ‘God his tits bounce more than most anime girls’!’

“Hommer, Wrunch,” the Dragon Lord declared in a gravely voice that must have hurt his throat terribly because I could tell it was him trying to make it sound far more raspy than it actually was. He reached out and accepted from one of his attendants (a thin woman with a bit of sunscreen globbed on her nose) a 2 liter of cola that he took a long swig of before continuing. “Who have you brought to this sacred chamber?”

“We found these intruders trying to claim part of your kingdom,” the man said with a bow.

“Ah, so thieves then!” The Dragon Lord declared. “Trying to stake claim to my lands!”

“We were doing no such thing!” Chichi snapped back. “We were camping… in a National Park… and then your goons came and captured us.”

“As is there right! This land belongs to me! It is my right as the lord of this lands! They are my kingdom and-“

“Wait,” Goku said, cutting him off, “how can this be a kingdom if you aren’t a king?”

“What?”

“Well… I just mean that an Emperor has an empire and a king has a kingdom so shouldn’t you have a… lorddom?”

“No. it is a kingdom!”

“But you aren’t a king,” Goku said again.

“Well… yes, I am not a king.” The Dragon Lord shrugged. “I am not that egotistical. I merely ask for total domain over all I see, starting from this spot and expanding until it covers the entire globe. That isn’t too much to ask, is it?”

“Well, a little bit?” Goku asked, tilting his head. “Me personally, all I really want is to have a good day training and spend time with my friends and family.”

“HA!” The Dragon Lord declared. “You are a fool then, intruder! Friends and family… I have no need for such things! I have my subjects!” He snapped his fingers and one brought him a specter, another a shield with a crudely painted dragon on it. Both of which, unlike everything else, actually looked fancy (save for the horrible dragon drawing). “They obey me… for they know the power I wield!”

“Dad!” Gohan hissed urgently. “Isn’t that-“

“It is,” Goku said, staring at the specter, the head of which was the Two-Star Dragon Ball.

The Dragon Lord noticed where we were looking and chuckled. “Noticed that, did you?” He patted the specter with his hand. “This is the proof of my strength and power. I discovered this orb 3 years ago and with it I was able to dominate the wills of my subjects, to get them to obey! They know the terrible power it has!”

“It has terrible power?” the woman that had been leading us to the chamber asked, confused.

That caused the Dragon Lord to frown. “Well… yes. Of course it does! That is why you follow me, Wronch.”

“I follow you because I lost the lease on my apartment,” she said. “Free room and board. Have you SEEN the rent some places are demanding?”

The Dragon Lord pressed his lips together. “Well… okay, I do remember you mentioning that in the break room when we discussed our plans-“

“My car broke down and you said I could use your phone if I helped you move a few things,” Hommer stated. “Huh, come to think of it… its been 9 months. I bet my wife and kids are worried about me.”

“I thought we were trying out for a play,” someone else said.

“I am going to be deactivated surrounded by the dumbest people on Earth,” Isco bemoaned. “Which is saying a lot, considering who you normally keep us around, sir.”

“ENOUGH!” The Dragon Lord bellowed. “You dare put delusions in my subjects’ minds? I had been considering allowing you to join us but now you will die for your actions!” He leapt to his feet and pointed the specter at us. “Suffer the power and wrath of the Dragon Lord!”

I let out a scream.

“See! See! He knows the terror-“

“WHY ARE YOU WEARING A SPEEDO!?!” I cried out, shielding my eyes. “Oh god I can still see it!” I chanced a peak and saw the Dragon Lord look down at his lime green speedo, fingering the hem slightly before tugging them up. “Oh lord above that makes it worse!”

“What does Kami have to do with that?” Goku asked, confused.

“IF HE WERE THE REAL GUARDIAN HE WOULD PROTECT US FROM THAT!”

“ENOUGH!” The Dragon Lord roared. “You will all perish by my hand for trying to steal my kingdom and my treasure.”

I rubbed my eyes and focused on staring at the Dragon Lord’s feet. “Listen… I don’t think you’ve thought this through. That Dragon Ball… it did nothing to help you convince these-“ ‘Don’t call them idiots, don’t call them idiots!’ “-people to be your subjects. You’ve convinced them to abandon their jobs, their families-“

“Oh man, I told my mom I was getting milk!” someone cried out. “I bet it spoiled by now.” He lifted up a jug of… yellow slime.

‘Don’t call them idiots,’ I mentally repeated. “You did that. On your own. You managed to bring together your group through sheer force of will. That’s impressive. In fact, one could make the argument that the Dragon Ball is a crutch… and excuse for others to NOT recognize your power. That rather than point at you and admiring all you have done they will dismiss you as just the guy holding up the relic, the true source of your power.” I took a step forward. “Do you want to be known as the man who raised a kingdom all on his own… or the man who has a Dragon Ball?”

The Dragon Lord looked down at his specter, letting it droop just a touch.

“…I kinda want both,” he said, his subjects gripping their spears and advancing towards us.

“Fuck it. Goku!”

“Right!” he declared, falling into a defensive stance. Chichi did the same while I… well, I wasn’t sure WHAT I was doing but better than sitting their scratching myself. “Isco, get Gohan someplace safe!”

“Which means I will also be someplace safe so I am fine with that, Mister Son,” Isco stated, using his spindly little arms to grab Gohan and, rather easily I must admit, heave him up and fly towards the ceiling of the cave chamber.

“If it’s a fight you want, it’s a fight you will get!” the Dragon Lord shouted, leaping down the throne of suitcases. He was… surprising agile for a big man, I had to admit. He spun his scepter before bringing his shield up to bear. “Eliminate the threats, you wretches!”

“This is the weirdest flash mob I’ve ever been apart of,” one of the subjects said.

“I thought it was an extreme fitness camp myself, Rowbar,” a woman in a torn tropical dress declared before shrugging and rushing towards us, trying to spear Chichi in the side. She managed to grab the weapon and easily snap it in half, tossing the parts at two more of the Dragon Lord’s subjects, boinking them on their heads and causing their eyes to bulge and their tongues to stick out before they fell to the ground.

“HAYA!” Goku shouted, throwing a punch that had the strength to shatter a great oak right at the Dragon Lord, the large man bringing his shield up and catching the strike. The moment Goku’s fist connected though there was a muffled ‘clank’ and the shield pulsed before letting loose a blast of air that sent Goku skidding back. “Ow!” He whined, waving his hand. “Man, what is that shield made of anyway? That really smarted!”

“This?” the Dragon King said in a dismissive and bored tone. “I don’t know. One day while I was cleaning one of the park’s rest areas I discovered an undocumented tunnel that led to a cave. There I found a treasure chest and I opened it. I thought maybe I’d find something interesting like a television or a year’s supply of tacos but all there was inside was this shield. According to some carvings on the rocks nearby it is the ‘Shield of Countless Defense’ and absorbs the blows of a foe to send them back but I never really got into Frisbee or the rules so…” He gave a helpless shrug. “I did paint this dragon on there. That makes it a bit neat.” He gestured at the image of the crude looking dragon that he’d clearly painted onto it with his fingers. “Honestly I keep thinking I should get around to trading it in for a TV but you know how you plan to clean your cave but as you go about your day you get distracted and when bedtime rolls around you haven’t gotten to it?”

“…oh my god,” I muttered before having to duck when Hommer tried to drive a spear through my throat. “Hey! Watch it with that!”

“I am watching it. Watching as it goes to pierce your liar throat!” He went in for another attack and I leapt back, making sure to keep myself out of range. “Stand still and just die!”

“You want me to die?” I asked, realizing I might have figured out an out for all of this. ‘These people are, after all, gullible fools…’

“That’s right!”

“Well, why didn’t you say so!” I said happily, holding out my arms. “Honestly, you really should learn how to communicate with people and let them know what you want. It helps stop misunderstandings.”

That caused Hommer and Wrunch dead in their tracks, their spears dropping slightly as they considered me carefully. “Oh,” Wrunch said, glancing at Hommer. “I guess we should have made that clear.”

“Yeah.” Hommer scratched at his chin. “Sorry about that.”

“No problem, happens all the time.” I gave a friendly smile. “Okay then, we can do this.”

“You are very polite,” Hommer stated.

“Hey, why not?” He began to rear back only for me to slap my head. “I almost forgot! I need to see your form K-450.” I held out my hand.

“My… what?”

I gave the sigh I tended to use when I had just sat down for lunch and one of my employees called me just as I had peeled my apple and told me I had to come super quick because there was a customer who wanted something and they didn’t want to upset them by saying ‘no’. “Form K-450, intent to kill a documentarian.” I gestured up at Isco. “Because this is going to be filmed and in my documentary you have to sign off on the waiver so we can use your likeness.”

Wrunch frowned at that, tapping her spear against her palm. “Can’t you just… blur our faces out?”

“Well, sure,” I said but before they could move to attack again I added, “but that is going to be a Form B-52. Do… do you want to fill out a B-52?” I asked just like one would if their friend said, “I think we should stick live piranhas on our dicks”.

“…no?” Hommer said, realizing that a B-52 might not be something he wanted to tangle with.

I sighed in relief. “Good. That’s really good.”

Wrunch nodded and held out her hand. “Alright, let’s fill out the forms and get to killing you.”

I laughed at that; gentle though, not mocking. Nothing that would set them off. A chuckle a parent might use. “I don’t carry the forms WITH me. You know how big and bulky those things are? We have to submit a request for K-450 forms. You have any writing paper around here?”

“I think Sablade has a stack of it,” Hommer stated.

“Great. I’ll try and walk you through it.”

Wrunch went to retrieve the paper only to pause. “Wait… why aren’t Sicket and Clemp having to fill out those forms? They are fighting that woman!”

I glanced over at Chichi just as she did a spin kick, knocking out another one of the Dragon Lord’s subjects. “Oh, its because they were grandfathered in to be allowed to do that. All very technical. I can get you the documents to prove it… you’ll just need to request them using a F-2U form-“

“We’re good! We’re good!” the two shouted, hurrying off to get the paper.

“Oh baby, you are so talented,” I murmured to myself, “and they are so DUMB!”

I looked back to where Goku was fighting the Dragon Lord and saw that unfortunately he hadn’t figured out a way to get past his defenses. The man might have been a big ol’ boy and have fashion sense that would make Richard Simmons scream in terror but I had to admit he knew how to use that shield. Every time Goku threw a punch the Dragon Lord managed to block it. Didn’t matter if it was fast or slow either. Goku sometimes wound up for a big hard punch and the Dragon Lord would brace himself even as the shield did all the work. Other times he went for a flurry of hits, lightning quick so that his hands completely disappeared into a blur. Once more the Dragon Lord managed to block every single one. And when he did Goku would be driven back, his knuckles bruised as his own power was used against him.

“You can’t defeat me,” the Dragon Lord mocked. “You have no hope! I am the wall that will never break! The fortress that will never fall!” He pointed his specter at the panting Saiyan. “You will die here, intruder, and there is nothing you can-“

And that’s when Gohan slammed the extending Power Pole into the top of the Dragon Lord’s head, driving it a bit down into his torso before it popped back up, revealing his dazed and swirling eyes.

“Nice work, Gohan!” Goku called up to his son. “I knew if I pushed him to the right spot you’d take him out!” He turned to help Chichi only to see her standing next to a scattering of bodies, brushing her hands against one another with a little cloud of dust coming off of them.

“I think I need to begin training again if I am going to travel more with you, Goku!” she declared, doing a high kick that had my groin aching just at the sight of it. “I’m not as flexible as I was five years ago!”

Goku chuckled at that. “Hey, we’ll figure out a good regiment for you!” He turned to me. “Where are your opponents, Kayos?”

“Oh, they are around but we won’t need to worry about them,” I said with a shrug, walking over to the Dragon Lord’s knocked out form. I nudged him with my shoe, making sure he was out cold. “And to the victor go the spoils,” I commented.

“Yeah!” Goku said, grabbing the Dragon Ball and passing it from hand to hand. Isco dropped down with Gohan, his father ruffling his hair before he pressed his lips together in thought. “So… like using the Power Pole?”

“yeah!” Gohan chirped. “It worked out really well!”

“I’m glad. I might have grown out of using weapons but that doesn’t mean you can’t use them.” He reached down and grabbed the Dragon Lord’s shield. “Here Gohan… why don’t you have this?”

“Goku?” Chichi asked.

“You saw what it could do,” he argued. “And you are always worried that Gohan might get hurt. The Power Pole means he can fight at a distance if he has to and the shield will protect him.”

“Hmmm.” She slowly nodded. “I like it!” She walked over and kissed Goku on the cheek. “And I like you using your head for more than fighting.”

Goku blushed at that before leaning down and strapping the shield to Gohan’s arm. The boy grinned only to cry out when the shield made him tilt to the left, his arm flailing about wildly as he tried to right himself. Goku finally grabbed him and steadied him, chuckling softly as he helped Gohan move the shield so it was in front of him, a bit more balanced.

“Guess we’ll have to get you used to the weight!” he teased and Gohan looked at the shield, a bit unsure before his gaze hardened and he gave a firm nod.

“Well, I think we should get out of here before anyone wakes up,” Chichi said. “I really don’t want to have to deal with these people anymore.”

“Probably should call the authorities too,” I muttered. “Isco?”

“Already done, sir. They should be here within the next hour.”

Goku nodded at that. “Then let’s get moving. Here Kayos, why don’t you hang onto the Dragon Ball, just in case?”

I didn’t quite follow his logic since I was weaker than probably even Gohan, but shrugged all the same and took the Dragon Ball.

“Mmm… another has claimed me. Hopefully they will have better hygiene than the last guy.”

“What the-?”

“Kayos?” Goku asked, seeing me staring intently at the Dragon Ball. “You okay?”

“Shot in the dark but you ever have one of these things… talk to you?”

Goku rubbed the back of his head, pondering that. “Not that I can say. Of course I might not have heard it…”

“You do get easily distracted,” Chichi stated.

“What?” Goku exclaimed, staring at his wife. “I do not!”

“Please, you always do. Everyone knows it!” She smiled and motioned for Gohan to follow her back towards the tunnel.

“They… they do not! Come on Chichi!” Goku gave chase after his family, leaving me and Isco standing amongst our fallen foes.

“Sir?” Isco asked.

“Nothing,” I muttered, the Dragon Ball silent. “Hopefully I’m just… hearing things.”

I didn’t need to look at Isco to know he didn’t believe that either.

~MC~MC~MC~

“We brought pencils and pens, just in case!” Hommer said, coming back into the chamber, Wrunch right behind him with an entire ream of paper. “Now then…”

The two looked at their fallen companions.

“He… he tricked us!” Wrunch declared. “He tricked us and fled!” She narrowed her eyes. “That man is so dead!”

“Yes!” Hommer declared. “So… let’s get that K-450 request put in so we can do just that.”

Wrunch nodded and the two sat down, using the Dragon Lord’s conked-out form as a table to begin their writing.

Chapter Text

“Hey dad?”

“Bulma!” Dr. Briefs said with a smile, stubbing out his cigarette and twisting away from the microscope he had been using to look at… well, Bulma wasn’t sure what her father was working on. With him it could have been a thousand different things. People tended to forget that while his first degree was in Physical Science he had, in his long life, earned a multitude of others. Couple that with his mind working so quick at times that he tended to solve problems before he even finished studying them and it was common to find him with multiple projects going at once.

‘If it weren’t for mom’s laser focus I probably would have been just as hyper erratic as he gets!’ Bulma thought to herself as she moved into his workshop. “Are you busy? I can come back…”

“Nonsense!” Dr. Briefs declared, patting a chair. “How many times have I told you that you are welcome to interrupt me at any time?”

Bulma, knowing that he wasn’t speaking hypothetically, instantly stated, “28 times.”

“Exactly.”

“Its just… I know you are busy and I’m probably being silly-“

Her father raised a hand, cutting her off. “Bulma. There is nothing you could say that is silly.” He paused. “Well, unless you were TRYING to be silly. Are you?”

“No dad,” she said with a smile.

“Then you aren’t being silly.” He reached up and rubbed his beloved cat Scratch under the chin. “My inventions… they are just lifeless things. You. Your mother. Our pets. They are what matter. People tell me that what I create will stand the test of time and that’s why I should focus on them… I say that’s why I shouldn’t. Because they will last forever; all of you will not. I only have so much time with all of you and I don’t want to waste a second of it. I set this down-“ He picked up a bit of metal, a device of some kind, Bulma wasn’t for sure, “-and it will be there when I get back, exactly the same. But I blink and suddenly you aren’t babbling at my ankles but rushing off to school.” He smiled at her and Bulma found herself managing to smile back. “So… what is it you want to talk about?”

“Well…” She shifted, wringing her hands together. “I guess it… kind of has to do with what you were just talking about. People not being around forever.”

“Ah,” he said, leaning back in his chair. “Is this about Yamcha?”

“It is,” she admitted.

“Feeling bad about breaking up with him and now he’s dead.”

Bulma winced at that. Her father was being rather direct, yes… but considering they were literally waiting to bring Yamcha back why dance around the subject of death?

“That’s the thing, dad… I don’t feel bad.”

Her father stared at her for several long moments before finally nodding. “Of course. You feel as if you should feel worse and you don’t.”

“Exactly!” She threw her arms up in the air and rolled back in her chair a few feet. “And what’s worse is I don’t know how to feel about not knowing how to feel! I mean… should I be more upset because the two of us dated and while I had decided to break up with him because we were having issues he was still my boyfriend up til right now and I should be mourning him? Or am I trying to force myself to mourn him more because I feel like I should but I really don’t? Am I too sad or not enough!” she made her chair spin several times. “I just don’t know! And its driving me crazy because I feel like everyone is looking at me expecting me to feel worse and sometimes I think they are right and other times I feel like they should lay off and… and…” she suddenly stopped herself. “And now I’m dizzy.”

Her father pushed away from his desk and patted her on the knee as Bulma hung her head. “Well, I’d ask if you wanted to know what I think but I think the answer is pretty obvious.” She gave her dad a watery smile at that. “Bulma, there is no wrong way to grieve. Anyone who tells you otherwise is a fool. We aren’t machines… I should know, I’ve built enough of them!” She chuckled at that, weak and soft but it was still a chuckle. “We all deal with life in our own ways. We approach everything differently and so long as you aren’t breaking some law… then its fine, no matter what we do.”

“I know, but-“

Her father cut her off before she could go any further. “Bulma, just look at me and your friend Goku. We are completely different and I don’t just mean in terms of how we handle threats. He punches them and I design lasers that burn them up. He married that girl Chichi before he was 20 and I waited till I was in my late 40s before I married. Does that make either of us a bad husband or father?”

“Of course not,” Bulma said at once. “Both of you are great. You’re… well, you know.” She smiled and he nodded once in acceptance of that. “And Goku… oh if you saw how he was with Gohan…”

“That’s my point, Bulma. We all live how we wish. And it is different from everyone else and we have no right to judge others for how they live. You mourn how you wish to mourn, sweetie.”

“…right,” she said, taking a breath. She didn’t know if she believed her father but she did appreciate his kind words.

“Now then,” he said softly, squeezing her knee, “with that settled can I tell you something that might upset you or might make you feel a bit of relief?”

“Ooookay,” she said slowly, unsure just WHAT her father might be getting at.

“You and Yamcha were never going to last.”

“…oh,” she said, surprised by that rather frank announcement.

“I’m sorry sweetie but it’s true. The two of you… well, you didn’t fit together well.” He looked away, but less because he was ashamed, she could tell, and more that he was trying to figure out how to explain what he was trying to tell her. “You know how sometimes you need a wretch that applies a ton of pressure? The nut is just stubborn and it sticks no matter what you do or however many times you loosen it? And other times there are nuts that need to be handled gently because if you squeeze too hard you could cause it to strip the bolt’s threads or dig into the wood? There is nothing wrong with the wrench or the nut. They just don’t work together.”

“That was me and Yamcha, huh?”

“In my opinion yes. He is a nice boy and a good friend. I hope you two can keep being friends. But you weren’t right for each other. I could tell that by the way you two fought.”

“Yeah, I can see that,” she said with a shake of her head. “The way the two of us would go at each other-“

“That’s not what I meant,” he said, cutting her off. “It’s natural for couples to fight.”

“Not you and mom,” she said.

That made her father chortle. “Oh, your mother and I find our ways to show we’re mad at each other. You just never noticed because we swore never to do that in front of you.” He looked her in the eye and she knew at once she’d spend the next few nights lying in her bed and wondering just WHAT she had missed when it came to her parents and their marriage. The fights they had had in secret that she’d never known about. “Couples fight but the good couples know how to fight properly. You and Yamcha? You didn’t fight properly at all.”

“Because we yelled at each other.”

“Because you yelled and he left.”

Bulma opened her mouth to counter that. To tell her father he was wrong and that Yamcha wasn’t a coward who fled confrontation. That he just knew when to leave unlike so many others.

Yet she found herself unable to say a word.

Her mind went to so many of their fights. How she would get upset with something he would say or do… or just as many times wouldn’t say or do… and then the two of them would begin bickering and hurling insults only for Yamcha to leave with a bitter little comment while she was left shouting for him to come back and finish what they had started. And while they would eventually make up it never felt like anything was settled.

‘Wasn’t that why I decided to finally break up with him?’ she thought to herself. ‘We fought about him wanting to come late to our reunion because there was that convention he wanted to go to and when I got mad he decided not to come at all? Even though he knew how important it was to me?’

Her father continued. “You have always been someone that needed to be challenged in everything. Your first word was ‘why’ after all. You were never happy in school, saying that you were tired of the teachers making you hold back so that others could try and catch up. We gave up trying to hide your birthday presents because you always found them.”

“You should have tried better,” she teased lightly.

“Yamcha was never going to challenge you, Bulma. Not in the way you needed. You need someone that will push back against you and see a fight through to the finish. Yamcha found it easier just to leave the conflict which is why nothing every truly became settled for you two. There is nothing wrong with his choices except they didn’t work well for you as a person.” He paused, smiling slightly. “Honestly if your friend Goku treated arguments like he does fights I’d have pushed for you to date him!”

“Dad!” Bulma cried out, crinkling her nose in disgust. “I could never… with Goku…”

“Why not? He’s a handsome young man. Very passionate.”

“He’s… so he said something the other day and it made me realize that… he’s the brother I never had, okay? So me and him?” She shook her head violently, trying to dislodge those horrid thoughts. “No. Just… no.”

Her father chuckled at her reaction which made her scowl all the more at him. “Very well. And like I said it wouldn’t work anyway. Outside of a physical fight he’s too easy going and timid. Reminds me of some of the boys you used to coo over when you were younger.”

“I never ‘cooed’,” Bulma complained.

“You only saw their looks and never considered their personalities. They were too soft hearted for you… would have cried the first time you raised your voice.  You need someone like him but with plenty of passion and determination in all things. And a drive to win that matches your own.”

Bulma merely nodded, deciding to keep that all in mind. There was something to what her father had said. A logic that she’d never considered before but now that she knew it couldn’t get it out of her head. It was like when she learned a new trick to build an engine and wondered why she’d never tried something like it before.

‘Every time we fought I always pushed him and even though I was angry… I was never more upset than when he would walk away or refuse to talk to me. And when we made up I said I was fine and would apologize or tell him that I forgive him but… but I didn’t mean it. Not really. I kept dwelling on it. Even now it feels like he died just to avoid talking to me!’ She knew that was wrong to think and she’d never say the words aloud but it was true. ‘But someone that will challenge me? Who will stand up to me and scream right back when I’m being a bitch? Yeah, that could be frustrating… but no more than anything else. And…’ She smirked to herself, ‘there are benefits…’

“Sweetie?” Bulma’s mother called out. “Your friend Goku is here!”

“The last Dragon Ball!” Bulma said, getting up from her chair and hurrying over to the door only to turn back around and run to her dad, giving him a kiss on the cheek. “Thanks dad!”

“Have fun bringing the dead back to life, sweetie!” He called out after her as Bulma hurried upstairs.

~MC~MC~MC~

Piccolo frowned as he watched Goku greet the rest of his friends. He didn’t know why he was sticking around; he’d done his part and gotten the Dragon Ball. It had been ridiculously easy, as his had landed in a freshwater lake that was home to some rather angry fin-backed dinosaurs. A few punches to their snouts though had gotten them to back down and let him retrieve the ball. He’d barely gotten wet, honestly.

‘If that is how easy it was to gather the Dragon Balls I don’t know what gave my… what gave King Piccolo so many problems.’

Sometimes it was so odd to think about his previous incarnation. Some days he saw him as a father. One he didn’t know, other than the memories he had inherited from him, but a father all the same. He would do something and just KNOW that his father would not have done the same. Allying with Goku, for one. Or not taking advantage of him being injured by Raditz; King Piccolo would have slaughtered all of them even if it meant his death later, smiling as he finally managed to end his hated foe once and for all. But Piccolo hadn’t done that; he had realized that in order to ensure the Earth survived Raditz he needed to work with Goku. Let them determine who ruled over the planet later; far better that than to be King of Ashes.

‘Yet there are other times where I feel exactly like him,’ Piccolo thought as he stood in the corner of Capsule Corp’s main courtyard, Goku and his friends chatting amongst themselves. ‘I remember things… memories that I can only have if I were him born again. Did we manage to cheat death through the reincarnation? Or is it something else?’ He shut his eyes. ‘And why does it matter when that Saiyan will be returning in 13 months? Deciding who I am will not help us win.’

“-very helpful,” Goku’s wife, Chichi if Piccolo remembered correctly, was telling Bulma. “Thank you for letting Kayos come with us.”

“You are more than welcome!” Bulma said before suddenly grabbing the tall blond human’s arm and tugging him away from the Son family. “But just remember he is documenting MY life!”

“Come on Bulma, we didn’t forget that!” Goku called out. “He asked us a lot of questions about you…” Bulma though didn’t respond and after a moment Goku noticed Piccolo and beamed. “Hey! You been here long?”

“Since this afternoon,” Piccolo said. The moon was a half full and beginning to rise, marking how late it was. “What took you so long? We have to be training and every second we waste only gets us farther behind.”

“Yeah, I know that,” Goku said, not taking offense to Piccolo’s tone. It was… something that didn’t annoy him about his rival; that he didn’t get offended over the smallest thing. “We ran into some guy who thought he was the next ruler of Earth. Had to deal with him.”

“I hope you did,” Piccolo stated. “The earth-“

“Mr. Piccolo?”

He looked down to see Goku’s son staring up at him with large bright eyes.

“…what?” he asked coldly.

“I… that is… well-“

“Spin it out, runt,” Piccolo said sternly, wondering why the child was gawking at him. ‘Want to mock me? Say that his father is stronger? Maybe just stare because I am a demon and he is a oh-so-wonderful human-‘

“I wanted to thank you!” he called out quickly, giving him a bow.

Piccolo blinked at that.

“W…what?” he managed to get out.

“Thank you for helping my daddy, Mr. Piccolo. If you hadn’t fought with him he would have lost to that mean man.”

“Yes,” Chichi said, startling Piccolo even more when SHE bowed to him. “Thank you for standing with Goku. I know you didn’t need to but I am grateful.”

Piccolo looked at them for several moments before turning his head away. “We had a common enemy. It only made sense to help him.”

“You sure did!” Goku said cheerfully. “You have gotten really strong, Piccolo! I’m glad you’re on my side for this and not against me!” He refused to twist his head towards the Saiyan warrior despite how very much he wished to do so. It… couldn’t be true, could it? Goku, the man that had killed his father, a father who had caused the deaths of his friends Chiaotzu, Krillin, and his teacher Master Roshi… admiring his strength and expressing how HAPPY he didn’t have to fight him? “Don’t get me wrong, I’d love to spar with you again… but maybe not where we had to kill each other?” He smiled big and bold as he rubbed the back of his head. “I mean, fighting is much more fun when you and your opponent can both walk away and train to get even better!”

“…hmmpf,” Piccolo muttered, refusing to acknowledge what the other man had said.

“Come on guys!” Bulma called out, waving for them to join her. “We’re going to summon the dragon!”

Piccolo moved to head out… and he CERTAINLY didn’t make sure to shorten his steps so Gohan, who kept looking at him even as he held his father’s hand, could keep up.

“So,” Kayos said asked, hands jammed into his pockets, “how are we explaining the giant dragon appearing in the middle of the city?” He had thrown on a brown canvas jacket over his shirt but otherwise was dressed pretty much the same as he had been when Piccolo had last seen him.

‘Might be the only smart one here,’ Piccolo thought as Goku and his friends began to stammer that it was fine and they were SURE that summoning a giant magical dragon in the middle of a major city wouldn’t cause any problems.  ‘He seems to be the only one here that thinks more than two steps at a time.’ He frowned as he watched the man rock on his heels. ‘Of course he’s also a weakling… no training and its clear he isn’t interested in learning. Just spending a few hours with him shows me he’ll never be a fighter. One ki blast or a proper punch and he’d be dead and gone.’

That… well, he wasn’t sure how he felt about all of that.

Goku stepped up towards the pile of Dragon Balls, placing the last one down and causing them all the pulse with energy. Piccolo’s fingers twitched and he could hear his father commanding him to wish for immortality. And yet he also heard Kayos’ comments about how that was a foolish wish and forced such thoughts from his mind. As the man had said it would be a wasteful, foolish wish, and doing so would also turn Goku and his allies against him. And as much as he hated to admit it he needed them at the moment in order to deal with Raditz.

“Hey Krillin?” Goku said, turning towards the short fighter. “Why don’t you do the honors?”

“Me? You… you sure?”

“Yeah,” Goku said at once. He walked over and placed his hand on Krillin’s shoulder “I know you blame yourself for what happened with Yamcha. So go ahead... bring our brother home.”

Krillin stared at Goku for a moment before rubbing his arm against his eyes, Piccolo merely rolling his eyes at such a display. But soon enough the Buddhist stepped forward and Goku returned to his family, taking hold of Gohan’s hand. It was only because Krillin had begun to speak that Piccolo didn’t cry out in surprise when Gohan used his free hand to grab onto his finger.

“Eternal Shenron!” Krillin called out, thrusting his arms skyward. “By your name I summon you forth!”

The Dragon Balls lit up even as the skies grew dark above them, the moon and stars disappearing so that the only light was that of the Dragon Balls. From them burst forth seven beams of light that twisted together to take on the form of a great serpentine dragon. Piccolo stared up, feeling a sense of… well, he refused to call it wonder… build in him as the energy condensed and transformed into the great dragon who could make the impossible a reality.

“I am the Eternal Dragon!” Shenron declared. “State your wish and I shall grant it!”

Krillin swallowed, head tilted up as he called out. “All Mighty Shenron, we ask you-“

‘I must ask you to stop and listen to me before you continue.’

“Did… did you hear that?” Bulma asked, looking about.

“Mommy, who was that?” Gohan asked.

Goku frowned. “Kami?”

Piccolo scowled at the mention of his other half. ‘Wonderful. The very last being I wanted to hear from.’

‘That might be, Piccolo, but I will be heard all the same,’ Kami stated. ‘You can not wish for Yamcha to return.’

“Wh…what?” Krillin stammered out.  “Why not?! Why can’t Yamcha come back! He deserves to return-“

‘I mean that this is not the right time to bring him back,’ Kami continued. ‘When Yamcha died I went to see him… I was able to convince King Yemma to allow him to run upon Snake Way, the great path of the Otherworld. Should he complete his journey he will find at the end of the path King Kai, the wisest and most cunning fighter in our galaxy.’

“Really?!?” Goku exclaimed. “And he’ll teach Yamcha?”

Piccolo heard Kami murmur in confirmation. ‘With this new threat coming I felt it best that Yamcha learn from him. The techniques that King Kai can teach him will give you a grand advantage in the challenges to come. I ask you to give Yamcha one year to learn under King Kai before you bring him back to life.’

“Well, if you say so,” Tien muttered. “I suppose learning some super secret moves would be nice.”

At once Piccolo felt Kami leave his mind. ‘Hmmpf. leave it to the old bastard to disappear after giving a command, not bothering to even say goodbye.’

“Wow, the most cunning warrior on the entire GALAXY!” Goku exclaimed. “I wish I could train with him.”

“DID YOU MISS THE PART WHERE YOU’D HAVE TO BE DEAD?!?!” Chichi roared, causing Goku to wave his hands about rapidly, cringing in the face of her rage.

“I didn’t mean it like that, Chichi, I swear!”

“Good on Yamcha,” Krillin said. “Its about time he got a chance to shine.”

“Yeah,” Tien agreed with a nod, “we’ll have to train even harder to make sure he doesn’t show us up.”

“I hear a lot of chatter but no wishes!”

Everyone started, realizing that with the news of Yamcha’s training they’d forgotten about Shenron.

“Oh, well…” Krillin began, shifting from foot to foot, “it turns out we don’t… really need you anymore. Think you can just head off till you recharge?”

“I can not,” Shenron declared. “I have been summoned and must grant a wish before I might depart. Now then… state your wish!”

“Huh,” Goku said, scratching the top of his head. “We haven’t ever needed to figure out what to do if we didn’t need a wish.” He looked around at the others. “Anyone have any ideas?”

“We could just ask Shenron to kill Raditz,” Bulma said.

Piccolo found himself shaking his head. “That won’t work. If Raditz is stronger than Kami than Shenron can’t kill him.”

“Seriously?!?!” Bulma cried out.

“Why do you think we never wished to do that with King Piccolo?” Master Roshi stated. “There are limits to the Dragon Balls.”

“I suppose we could just wish for something simple,” Tien said, lips pressed together in a thin line that made it clear he didn’t like wasting a wish like that.

“Oh!” Goku said. “We could ask for a TON of food! We’ll need to eat when we train!”

“Shenron is not a caterer!” Bulma shouted.

“What about a lifetime supply of beer?” Master Roshi said with a grin, rubbing his hands together.

Krillin huffed. “Considering what you love I’m surprised you didn’t ask for a lifetime of p-“

Kayos stepped forward. “Oh Mighty Shenron! Hear me and only me! I have a wish!”

‘Well… this is going to be interesting,’ Piccolo thought as everyone focused on the blond man.

~MC~MC~MC~

“I knew we couldn’t trust him!” Krillin shouted behind me and I did my best to block that out. Apparently he hadn’t taken my comment about poisons lightly.  “He’s probably going to wish for immortality for himself!”

“Come on Krillin,” Goku called out, “Kayos said that was a dumb wish. Why would he ask for that?”

“Because he was tricking us!” Krillin demanded.

Chichi spoke up. “We fought with Kayos against the Dragon Lord… if he has an idea for a wish I want to hear it!”

“More of a theory,” I stated, looking up at Shenron. He was massive and made me feel utterly tiny and I was doing all I could not to piss myself in his presence. “I imagine, Great Shenron, that you get tired of people summoning you for petty wishes.”

“Not as much as people refusing to make wishes,” he warned me.

“Point taken. Which is why I make this wish: I ask for you to provide me with an indestructible scroll, that will come to my hand when I mentally summon it, and will provide in writing, that I can read and understand fully, the answer to all questions I ask of it!”

I had taken the time to think the wish over carefully. While Shenron had proven to never try and twist any wishes to harm the wisher… well, enough tales about genies had taught me that you left as little wiggle room as possible. I needed a scroll that couldn’t be burned, stolen, or would write in some strange alien language. And would answer more than one question. I was sure there were ways for Shenron to dick with me if he wished but I was hopeful that he would accept what I wanted to work to create such a scroll… or even a better version.

I held my breath… and then felt a tingle in my right hand. I held my arm out and after a moment a traditional Japanese scroll flew into my hand, striking my palm with a dull slap.

“Your wish has been granted! Farewell!”  With that Shenron dove back down, returning to the Dragon Balls with suddenly rose into the air, glowing a pure white before they shot out in different directions, waiting for a year to recharge and be used again.

“Going to wish for immortality, am I?” I asked Krillin who had the decency to glance away, eyes shut and arms folded over his chest. I smacked the scroll against my open palm, looking it over carefully. “Well, we need a name for this thing. Powerful mystical relics need names, right? Scroll of Knowledge? That too on the nose?”

Goku frowned, leaning forward to look at the scroll better. “But why did you ask for that?” he asked. “You could have asked to… increase your ki or master a fighting style!”

“You think too small, Goku,” I teased, Isco zooming over to push him back. “Watch.” I unrolled the scroll. “What would be the best method to allow Krillin during the next year to unlock his full potential as a fighter?”

“Wha?” Krillin exclaimed, snapping his head towards me. But even as he did so the scroll began to write down upon itself the answer.

GO TO THE TEMPLE

OF THE REPENTENT MISER

AND SEEK THE TEXTS OF

THE SELFISH ONES

“The… what now?”

“OH!” Roshi exclaimed in surprise. “I’ve heard of the Selflish Ones! It was rumored that they learned how to ensure that they lost not a drop of Ki when in battle unless they willed themselves to.”

“Not lose any ki?” Krillin murmured.

Piccolo narrowed his eyes at that. “Whenever one battles they naturally lose ki…  it is impossible to not let it leak out.” He held out his hand and began to channel a ki blast and sure enough I saw that energy began to flicker off his fingers like smoke from a fire. “it is a natural thing. That’s why the more powerful the attack the more it drains you.”

“So its like the laws of thermodynamics!” Bulma stated. “Its impossible to get more energy than what you put in. You lose it to heat or other factors…”

“But according to the scroll,” I said, “it’s possible.”

Krillin was staring down at his hands before he too began to form some ki blast energy. “I will never be as strong as Goku… I know that. Accepted that. But if I could learn how to keep my ki so that I only used it to power myself and my attacks…”

I grinned and walked away from him, wiggling the scroll. “That’s why I made the wish. One wish for me to be a better fighter? That’s old and busted. A scroll that tells all of us how to go past our limits and become stronger? Oh… that’s the new hotness.”

“Wow,” Tien whispered. “With that… you could…” he trailed off, unable to finish.

“Yeah,” I said with a grin, looking at them all. “So I guess it’s a good thing Bulma hired me for a long time because it looks like Isco and I will be sticking around for a year!”

“I suppose I don’t have a choice in this, sir?”

“Oh, you have a choice. You can leave right now.”

“…I sense a trick.”

“Well, other than you’ll have to return your cut of our paycheck from her… I have a scroll that gives answers. Want to learn how to turn air into gold?” I asked him.

I could practically hear the cash register chimes in his little shell.

“So the blood sacks are stuck with us for a year.”

I chuckled at that. “And there it is.” I looked at the others who were staring at me. “So… training.”

“Right,” Goku said, clenching his fist and holding it up to his face. “Its time we prepare for Raditz’s return!”

Tien rubbed his chin. “Chiaotzu and I can head out and find a place where we can practice our moves. When you are ready, Kayos, you can find us and let us ask that scroll a few questions.”

“And I guess I should begin researching that Temple of the Repentant Miser,” Krillin said with a frown, kicking at the ground. “Now… where could that be.”

“I expect all of you to be stronger by the time I see you again,” Piccolo said coldly, glaring at all of his in equal measure. “If you expect me to be the one to save you all you’re in for a painful surprise. I’m willing to save the Earth but if you fall to Raditz that’s your fault.”

“Oh, don’t worry!” Goku exclaimed happily. “We’ll all make sure we are ready for him!”

“So, we meet back in a year!” Bulma chirped.

“RIGHT!” the Z Warrirors declared, all tensing and ready to fly-

“Hold up!” Chichi called out, grabbing onto Goku’s arm with one hand and Krillin’s in another. “…why are you all going your separate ways?”

“Uh… to train, Chichi,” Goku said, confused.

“Yeah,” Krillin echoed. “I need to find that temple.”

“Right and it makes sense for you to fly off when you KNOW where it is… but why go racing off now?” She looked at the others. “And why are all of you leaving?”

“To… train,” Tien repeated slowly.

Chichi’s eye twitched. “I get that but why aren’t you training TOGETHER!?!?”

The Z Fighters all stared at her in confusion and Chichi let out a weary sigh.

“Okay… so Goku and Piccolo… you two are roughly at the same level of power and strength, right?”

Piccolo frowned at that. “I’d say I’m far stronger than him-“

“NOW IS NOT THE TIME FOR BOASTING!” Chichi screamed, getting right in the Demon King’s face. Piccolo leaned back, eyes wide in shock and, I had to admit, a bit of fear. Not that I blamed him. Chichi might not have been a saiyan and might have gone to rust a bit when it came to her fighting (she had complained rather loudly on our trip to Capsule Corp about being out of shape and needing to get exercising again; I didn’t know if she noticed how Goku lit up at that but she’d realize soon enough that not training was the biggest mistake she’d ever made) but she still had the fires of a warrior in her. “Now then… Goku and Piccolo are roughly at the same level in terms of ability and power. So doesn’t it make more sense for you two to training TOGETHER?”

“What?!?” Piccolo cried out. “Train with him!?”

Goku though considered that, tapping his chin with his index finger. “Actually, that isn’t a bad idea. I bet there is a ton I could learn from you, Piccolo! And you from me.”

“Like his moves if you decide to finally settle things,” I whispered to Piccolo, having moved to stand near him as Chichi scolded the Namekian.

That gave Piccolo pause and he began to mull over Chichi’s suggestion. “I… suppose there is merits to that.”

“And Tien, Krillin, and Chiaotzu, the same applies to you three,” Chichi commented. “You can work together to strengthen yourself. Maybe even have 3 on 1 fights with Goku or Piccolo.” She smiled. “Unless you don’t think you can manage.”

‘Oh, she and I need to spend some time together!’ I thought with glee, watching as Chichi pressed just the right buttons to rile the Z Warriors up.

“We can manage just fine!” Krillin declared. “And when I find that new technique I’ll have to move up to work with Goku and Piccolo!”

“Only because I’ll surpass them,” Tien said firmly, Chiaotzu nodding in agreement.

Chichi turned to Bulma. “And if you come with all of us then you can come up with new ways to help these boys train.”

Bulma nodded, having realized a good idea when she saw one. “Yeah… knowing them they’d just keep punching and kicking each other. I can make machines that can push them even further.”

I took my chance to chime in. “It also will offer us all some protection. Raditz will honor the deal most likely but who knows what else is lurking out there. Plenty of old enemies that would enjoy taking you guys down and if you are all alone and get injured that could slow things down.”

Krillin gulped at that. “Yeah… not feeling like meeting Yamcha so soon!”

“And,” Isco stated, “considering that only Kayos here can read the Scroll-“

‘So the little bugger caught that… heh, good for him.’

“-You will need him around to answer questions. And rather than us traveling about finding you all it will be easier if we all stick together.”

“Exactly,” Chichi said with a smile. “All of us. Master Roshi can make sure you boys don’t forget the fundamentals and I’ll make sure-“

“Wait, you are coming too?” Master Roshi exclaimed.

“Of course I am,” Chichi stated. “I might have dedicated myself to being a wife and mother but I DID fight in the last Tournament… I know how to hold my own. And I can make sure none of you push yourself too far.” She narrowed her eyes. “Is that going to be a problem?”

“Well… heheh… not at all,” Roshi said nervously.

“Well I think its great!” Goku declared. “It will be nice for all of us to be together!” He wrapped an arm around Chichi and her glower at Roshi turned into a soft smile. “So… when do we get started?”

“I think that all depends on Bulma,” I chimed in.

“Me?” the young woman asked.

“Yeah. Capsule Corp must have some land sitting around not doing much. Maybe a research facility?”

Bulma considered that. “Hmmm… I’d have to ask my dad but there were a few large islands that we had set up some stations on to do testing. I could find one that doesn’t have a ton of wildlife so we wouldn’t have to worry about causing too much damage-“

“Or ones with a lot of vicious wildlife to test ourselves again,” Tien asked.

Krillin’s eyes went wide at that suggestion. “Uh… I don’t know about that…”

I watched as the gang began to discuss things, making plans and coming up with strategies.

‘Well… you wanted to change things and now you have. Goku won’t learn under King Kai so he’s not going to have the Kaioken in his backpocket. Chichi being with us is a plus but it also might hurt Gohan’s growth. Krillin and Tien hopefully will get stronger but Bulma and Master Roshi might end up in the crosshairs.’ I shook my head. ‘Yeah… you’ve changed things. The only question is will it lead to better things… or worse.’

Chapter Text

Raditz took a step out of his pod and took in a mouthful of the disgusting gaseous fumes that made up the planet’s atmosphere. He tasted many different things in the air but sulfur was the most familiar to him. The humans, according to the records his pod had scanned from the Earth databases, called the planet ‘Venus’, after a forgotten goddess of love and beauty. It was hot, coated in poisonous air, and threatened to kill all that stepped foot there.

‘They named it well,’ he thought to himself. ‘This planet is a proper saiyan bride made into stone and gas.’

He began to walk around his pod, letting his lungs get used to the atmosphere. He could already feel the burning deep in them, the fires growing, but he knew after a day or so at most they would adjust and he’d truly be able to begin training. No, first he would take his time, learn the lay of the land and prepare his camp.

Earth had been far too… clean. The air fresh and crisp. The sky too bright and cheerful. And it had been so quiet; unpolluted and unspoiled. He didn’t know how Kakarot could stand it. The air should have been filled with the stink of blood and half cooked flesh, bloating in the sun. The sky should have been filled with dark clouds, acid raining down all around the ruined cities thanks to all the smoke that was rising into the air. And the quiet should not have brought anyone a sense of peace… no… it should have brought foreboding and terror that a place once full of life was empty of it save for the Saiyans.

‘No wonder you couldn’t stand against me, Kakarot,’ He thought in disgust as he looked around the sickly yellow surface of the planet. ‘Earth made you soft. Weak. It will be up to me to ensure that the damage is undone and you are ready for what comes next.’

Because he knew that if he didn’t prepare his little brother… Vegeta would kill him where he stood. And most likely Raditz as well for wasting his time. The Prince of All Saiyans wasn’t known for his patience when it came to others, always demanding more and sooner from those he saw as below him. For himself? Oh yes, he could be patient. Raditz had seen Vegeta prolong the suffering of rebels and so-called freedom fighters, delighting in how he gave them glimmers of hope only to tear them away. A beast playing with his food, that was the Saiyan Prince. And if he couldn’t get Kakarot to a level that would impress Vegeta then he would be seen as nothing more than something for the Prince to test his knuckles against.

‘No… as much as I might not want a hard fight… I need to hope Kakarot at least has enough pride to train. To grow stronger. That will make my job all the easier.’ He looked up at the sky, a breeze blowing a cloud of noxious fumes into his face. For a lesser being it would have left them gagging and choking, clutching at their throat as they struggled to breathe only for those desperate breaths to bring their death. Raditz though merely snorted before he set about removing bits of his armor. ‘But no matter how hard you train… you’ll never be better than me, brother. I will defeat you again and when I do you will submit. And then… we will begin the work needed to be done. The universe will learn the fear the Sons of Bardock!’

~MC~MC~MC~

“Remember that the only limit is yourself.”

The words of Kami echoed in Yamcha’s head as he continued along the winding path of Snake Way, though not as quickly as when he had started. He hadn’t truly understood how long it was when he’d been told of the opportunity to train. Kami and King Yemma had warned him that it would be a long and difficult journey but he had laughed and said that he could handle it. He’d told them that he’d get bored hanging around Heaven or helping out King Yemma by fetching him coffee. No… better to run on Snake Way and have a chance to grow stronger!

Yamcha slowly slid down onto the road and took in several deep pulls of air.

When he’d reached the beginning of Snake Way and seen it stretched out before him, zigzagging about so that it would take 10 times as long to reach the end than if it were simply a straight line he’d still believed that it would be fine and he’d be able to get through it. Kami had warned him of the dangers. While there would be no wind and the road level, it had no guard rail so if he slipped and fell he would plunge straight to hell, trapped there until his friends wished him back. Assuming he survived the wait. He’d assured Kami that it would be fine, that he could handle it.

“Just… a minute to… catch my breath…” Yamcha muttered to himself as he laid down on the road, staring up at the sky.

Kami had warned him that he wouldn’t be able to cheat his way across. “Snake Way… well, it isn’t alive in the sense that you and I are but there is something there. Something that understands the task ahead and does not look kindly on those that attempt to bypass it. Attempt to fly and you will find your ki drained at a rate far beyond what you are used too. Attempt to leap and the distance will grow as the coils shift, leaving you plummeting towards Hell. Try and find someone to carry you and Snake Way will shift and you will find yourself throwing from their arms. It knows what you want and it makes you to earn it. “

They had taken nearly a day going over every possibility and Yamcha had found there simply were no outs. He had to run Snake Way. The whole thing.

He felt his chest rise and fall as he sucked in mouthfuls of air, waiting for his heart to stop pounding.

But it was the last warning that Yamcha knew he should have listened to the most. Not dismissed and laughed at. The others? About how hard it would be and the inability to cheat? Both were still true but he knew that he could fight through those and make it through. He’d done it before. All his life had been people telling him he couldn’t do anything and him proving them wrong.

“The reason all but King Yemma have failed to complete Snake Way is not the distance. Snake Way beats you not through the body but the mind. Tales are told in Heaven and Hell of the greatest warriors, with bodies like stone, mind like steel, and determination like diamonds, who were found sobbing wreaks upon the way, begging to be brought back here. Hell is full of the prideful who chose torture over spending a moment more on the path.”

Yamcha understood now what Kami meant. He had been running for what felt like days yet all he saw was the clouds, the sky, and the path. He had no idea how far he had gone and how much remained. The sky never changed; there was no sun rising or setting so he honestly couldn’t even SAY how long he’d been running. It felt like days and he’d slept twice so far but it could have only been hours. Or perhaps longer as he’d run until he’d been exhausted. And because everything kept curling in on itself it was easy to become disoriented. The first time he’d prepared to go to sleep he’s suddenly jolted awake in terror that he’d get mixed up in the morning and begin running back the way he’d come, returning to King Yemma’s and losing all his progress. He feared that. If he got back to King Yemma’s… he wasn’t for sure if he could start again.

‘My friends are counting on me to get stronger,’ he thought to himself as he struggled to catch his breath. ‘I told them that I was going to train with King Kai… they are expecting me to return having learned all sorts of new moves that will help us deal with that bastard Raditz. If I am wished back and have to admit that I did nothing… I couldn’t live with it.’ He squeezed his eyes shut. ‘I’d tell Kami to tell them to not both and use their wish on something else.’

Letting out a sigh Yamcha kicked off his shoes, setting one near his head and the other a yard past his feet. After that first time sleeping, when he’d had a panic attack about not be able to remember which way to go, he had tossed and turned until finally coming up with a solution. By pointing his shoes in the right direction, and keeping them far enough away that there was no chance he might bump into them, he could always know which way to continue going.

‘Though,’ he thought with a yawn, ‘would be nice to have someone to talk to… or some music to play…’

He pulled off the top of his gi, draping it over his face to block out the cheery sky, and finally allowed himself to go to sleep.

~MC~MC~MC~

“Here we are!” Bulma declared as the boat’s ramp lowered down and all of us stepped onto the beach. “Welcome to Spoodo Island!”

It was a nice island, tropical but not so oppressively hot that we were all going to roast. Honestly it would have worked well as a tourist destination if it weren’t out in the middle of nowhere. Sandy white beach followed by a grassy plane and then a jungle with a few mountains in the center of the island. It was a bit too quiet at the moment, seeing as the only wildlife that made it onto the island were sea birds and they’d been scared off by our arrival, but I knew that would change when we actually began training.

“So, your family owns a place here, Bulma?” Krillian asked, adjusting his hat. He was wearing a windbreaker and had a baseball cap on, a duffle bag flung over his shoulder. All of us had brought bags, some more than most, and for some reason had decided to have them all gathered up right at the ramp even though we were supposed to explore the island first, get the lay of the land, and then get settled in.

“Oh no,” Bulma said with a grin, decked out in a t-shirt and jeans along with trendy sandals; she had spent half the flight debating about what color to paint her toenails, even asking PICCOLO what he thought. It had been… a long trip. “We own the whole island.”

“THE WHOLE ISLAND!!?!” Krillin exclaimed.

I glanced at him. “You forgot she was rich, didn’t you?”

“Well… maybe,” he said with a huff, refusing to look at me; even with helping him with the scroll he still was standoffish, refusing to trust me.

Bulma, not noticing the tension, grinned and motioned for us to follow her. “Come on now! I want to show you guys everything.”

I patted my pocket to make sure that I had the capsule with my hovercycle (Bulma had finally told me, when Krillin had brought it up to most likely try and get me in trouble, that I could keep it as it was too ‘girly’ for her; I endured the jokes because it was a flying motorcycle) before putting on my baseball cap and throwing out my hand, casually catching the Scroll of Knowledge as it flew to me.

“I hope there is a good charging station,” Isco stated. “I have the horrible vision of you trying to power me up with potatoes and wire.”

“We can eat the potatoes afterwards,” I reasoned.

“Ooooo!” Goku said with a beaming smile. “I could go for some potatoes! Fried. Mashed. Baked.”

I rolled my eyes at that as Bulma led us down onto the beach, it clear that she was enjoying the chance to play tour guide. “So this island doesn’t have much in terms of large wildlife. There was a sickness that spread through here that took out a lot of animals.”

“Sickness?” Chichi asked, coming to a stop barely off the ramp and looking about nervously. “Should we be here then?”

“Oh, its long cured!” Bulma assured her. “Happened when my dad was still in school. But no one wanted to spend the money putting new animals on the island so its mostly just bugs and plants and some sea birds. That’s honestly why dad bought it; this way he could do tests on stuff without disturbing local wildlife.”

“That was considerate of him,” Tien stated, shifting the duffle he had slung over his shoulder.

“Plus you never know how they might affect an experiment. You want to remove all the variables.”

“And there it is,” I said with a snicker while the others just stared at Bulma, confused. I leaned over to her and whispered, “Do you ever get tired of being the only person in the group who went to college?”

“College? I don’t think any of them went to high school.” Bulma began to point out other items of interest. “So if you don’t want to swim in the ocean there is a pool at the research facility. That’s where we’ll be staying unless you want to rough it.”

“Normally I’d say getting back ta nature is good for ya!” Master Roshi said before leaning back, his spine cracking. “Eh, but there are benefits to a nice bed!”

“I’ll stay there sometimes,” Goku stated, “but there might be days where I tire myself out and just sleep where I land-AAA!” he cried out when Chichi grabbed his ear.

“And by that you mean you are going to make sure you have JUST enough energy to get back to our room, right?”

“Yes! Yes!” Goku pleaded. “It will be good training!”

“Good,” Chichi said, letting him go.

Bulma merely continued on. “So that path leads to the research facility. We’ll be the only ones on the island so you don’t have to worry about bumping into anyone.”

“And she just jinxed us, I just know it,” Oolong commented to Chiaotzu. While they wouldn’t be officially training with us it had been decided that there might be uses for Oolong, Puar, and even Turtle, so they had been brought along for the trip. “Now we’re going to find some cult living underground.

“We already did that,” I commented.

“Yeah!” Goku proclaimed. “That’s where Gohan got his cool shield!”

Tien shook his head at that. “You are always getting into fights, aren’t you?”

“Hey!” Goku complained. “Its not like I tried to get into that fight. We were captured. And Chichi took out most of them!” He wrapped his arm around his wife and she smiled at his praise.

“ANYHOW!” Bulma said, annoyed that people had become distracted. “There are a lot of really nice places to explore here. The forest, of course. There is also the freshwater lake if you don’t want to swim in the ocean. And there are a series of caves and tunnels near the research station-“

“You might be treating this as a vacation,” Piccolo said coldly, “but I haven’t forgotten that we are here to prepare for Raditz returning. So just point me to the nearest field where I can begin working on getting stronger while the rest of you frolic. Seems like I have to be the one to save this planet.”

“Aw, don’t be like that, Piccolo!” Goku declared. “You know that I’m always up to train! And I can’t wait to train with you!”

“hmmmpf,” Piccolo said, arms folded over his chest and eyes closed. “Fine… but the rest of you better not get in our way.”

“Well,” Master Roshi stated, “if you are going to be that narrow minded then I guess we can count you OUT of being able to defeat that Raditz.”

The comment made Piccolo snap a single eye open. “WHAT… did you just say old man?”

“Only that you lack creativity if you are so dismissive of what Bulma was telling us about. A smart warrior uses everything to their advantage.”

“Laying on a beach getting a tan, snorkeling in the ocean, or spelunking is going to help people get stronger?” Piccolo mocked.

“How does he know about all that stuff?” I asked Isco who gave his version of a shrug.

“I’m disappointed in you, Piccolo,” Master Roshi said, moving to stand in front of the group. Despite the fact that he was wearing his customary Hawaiian shirt, shorts, and sunglasses I was suddenly struck by the remembrance that Roshi was one of the greatest martial artists that had ever lived. The man had forgotten more about fighting than most of us had ever learned. “The beach will help you learn how to fight on unstable terrain.” He tapped his walking staff against the sand, making several small divots. “Far too many people are only used to hard surfaces or training mats. But sand? Oh, that can shift and make you slide suddenly and that is a big benefit for anyone who needs to learn better foot placement.”

Suddenly Master Roshi threw down his walking staff and inhaled, his rail thin body going ramrod straight, causing him to gain about 3 to 5 inches in height as his chest broadened and his arms exploded with muscles.

“Allow me to demonstrate!” he declared and I watched with wide eyes as he tensed. “Ah, a volunteer!”

I looked about to see who he was going to demonstrate his lessons with… only to find everyone had leapt back, leaving me all alone.

“…you cowards!” I screamed right before Roshi was on me, using a palm thrust to send me stumbling back. “GAAAA!”

“See how I am able to adjust to the sands moving?” he asked even as he began to force me away from him with a rapid set up attacks. I found myself twisting and spinning about wildly, making all sorts of pained and panicked sounds as he moved about me. “This will help you better understand how your body works!”

Roshi grabbed onto my wrist and smirked before he spun me wildly before sending me flying through the air; I flailed my arms and legs, hoping maybe, just maybe, Kami loved me and when grant me flight.

He didn’t love me.

I slammed down into the ocean hard, sinking rapidly, and just as I began to kick back towards the surface I opened my eyes and found Master Roshi bobbing in front of me, hands glowing.

Bubbles burst from my mouth as I screamed right before he fired off a ki blast that send me back out of the water, body bouncing a few times like a skipping stone before I landed on the beach once more, weakly twitching.

“Fighting in the ocean helps build up your muscle. The water acts as a resistor, making your movements become slowed as you fight against it. Its like practicing in weighted clothes but for every part of your body and not just pressing down but from all directions.”

“Oh!” Goku said, stepping over me without a care. “And I bet it also would help with your lungs. You’d need to hold your breath down there so you’d have to get by with less oxygen. As you learned to fight like that getting more oxygen later on would leave you energized! And when you were fighting and began to pant it wouldn’t affect you as much! It’s like training on Kami’s Lookout.”

“As for the dark-“

Isco, bless him, cut in. “Miss Brief, I should inform you that if my partner dies I will not finish the documentary on my own. He handles editing.”

“Oh my god Kayos!” she screamed, finally remembering that I was lying there utterly wrecked. She hurried to my side and looked me over. “Master Roshi you idiot! You could have killed him!”

“What?” Roshi said and my head lulled to the side as he came up to me. “Oh… heh, I forgot that this here fella ain’t a fighter. Don’t have much ki either. Wondered why he didn’t try and fight back.” He nudged my burning chest with his foot.

“Mommy, is Mr. Kayos okay?” Gohan asked as he toddled over with my glasses, which had flown off my face after Roshi’s first attack.

“He will be,” Chichi said, walking over and forcing something past my lips. I chewed and swallowed and instantly the pain was gone.

“You got Senzu Beans?” Oolong commented.

Chichi nodded as I felt my body instantly knit itself back together. “Yes. Goku got a bag from Korin before he came home. I decided I should be the one to hold onto them… knowing all of you they’d be gone already as you pushed yourselves to the limit. And I’m glad I did. Kayos? Would you do the honors?

“Gladly,” I snarled before, without bothering to get up from where I was laying, slammed my fist right into Roshi’s balls. At once the old man deflated, falling to the ground and whining as he cupped his crotch. “Oh man up you pansy, its not the first time someone struck you like that, I’m sure!” I eased myself up, expecting to feel even a twinge of pain but honestly there was nothing at all. Not even the dull ache that came from a sudden pain that went away but the memory of it remained, like when you pulled a muscle and even a week later remembered what it had felt like to have that sharp stabbing sensation suddenly hit you. “Admittedly I’m probably the first dude to do that… Bulma, Chichi, scale of 1 to 10 how was that hit?”

“8,” Chichi stated.

“7 for me. I like to grab and twist myself if I can,” Bulma replied.

“Right.” I looked at the others. “Also Piccolo?”

“…yeah?” he asked, clearly wondering if I was going to find some way to make him a sobbing curled up blob like Roshi for starting this mess.

“The caves can be used to heighten your other senses. You and Goku are left in there and have to sense each other with just energy, hearing, smell, and touch. I’d say taste but… ew.”

Piccolo considered that for a moment before nodding. “Right. I suppose that will work.”

“I believe,” Isco stated, “that we should use today to get a better feel of what the island is like.” Goku and Krillin helped Roshi up, my punch having dropped him back into his normal old man form. “Then we can begin working on regiments for all of you.”

That made Tien frown. “I’m sorry but… you are a camera robot. What do you know about training?”

“Other than the fact that balloons of blood and fat are doing it wrong?” Isco asked sarcastically. “Oh, not much.”

“Hey!” Chiaotzu cried out, flying right up to Isco and getting into his… face? “Don’t talk to Tien like that!”

“Ah, so you wish to be lied to. Very well.” Isco shifted slightly so he was looking past Chiaotzu. “You are brilliant at training and it makes sense why you never finished learning from your master how to do it.”

Chiaotzu gave Isco a shove.

“Heh,” Krillin snickered, “maybe we just found a new sport: Robot vs. Person Boxing!”

Bulma frowned. “Wait, how do you know about Tien and his training and his master?”

“It seems that Master Shen is a vindictive old man. He set up an entire page on his school’s website about how much Tien and Chiaotzu suck.”

“Shen has a website?” I asked. “Wait… he knows what the internet is?”

“Apparently,” Isco stated, turning to Tien. “There is an entire section about how you once got your foot stuck in a poop bucket and another about how your third eye is clearly painted on and people should poke it.”

Tien pressed his lips together in a fine line. “He did claim he’d get his revenge…”

“If that’s his revenge I would like to request he be my eternal enemy!” I called out.

“But that doesn’t explain what you mean by my training being poor,” Tien said, glaring at the drone.

“Do you train in a similar way to Goku?”

“Yeah…” Tien said slowly.

“Then you are as bad at it as him.”

“HEY!” Goku exclaimed in a panic. “Why am I getting brought into this!? I didn’t do anything wrong.”

“On the contrary,” Isco stated, “you have done much wrong. You bragged how you would practice day and night, working yourself to utter exhaustion and then pushing through the pain. That you would repeat moves over and over until your arms and legs felt like they were going to fall off. That you dedicated yourself fully to training.”

“That’s right!” Goku said only for Master Roshi, having recovered from my testicular attack, to smack him in the side with his staff. “Owowowowow!” Goku whined. “Master Roshi, what was that for?”

“Is that flyin’ egg tellin’ the truth? Are ya makin’ all your trainin’ just be ya workin’ till ya collapse with no breaks?”

“Well… I eat,” Goku said only to get hit again. “OW! Master Roshi stop!” Goku pleaded.

“I’m guessin’ the rest of ya think that’s the smart way ta train?”

“Not me,” Piccolo said with a huff. “I often meditate.”

“Good!” Roshi declared. “I don’t need ta waste time teachin’ ya the basics!”

Gohan chose that moment to speak up. “I don’t understand, what’s wrong with how daddy trains?”

Roshi turned and spoke, in a softer voice, to the boy. “Its well and good to train but you need to give yourself time to rest. And eating and sleeping don’t count.”

“Its like how I allow you times to go play after you get some of our studying done,” Chichi told him. “It lets your mind process what you learned.”

“Aw come on!” Goku exclaimed. “That just means I have less time to train!” Krillin, Tien, and Chiaotzu all nodded at that.

I for one huffed. “All I do is basic weight training and speed walking and even I know you can’t lift iron every day. Doesn’t let your muscles heal up properly.”

Roshi pointed right at me. “And he’s the weakest of you all!”

“…fair,” I admitted, not bothering to argue.

“Hmmmpf,” Piccolo said with a huff, “no wonder you barely have a chance to stand against me if that is how you have been training.”

Goku pouted at that. “But when I train I get into the zone…”

“There are other ways to train though,” Chichi stated. “Mental training.”

“Mental?” Goku asked and I could practically see the thought bubble above his head that had him boxing a large cartoony brain.

“Okay, so we need to defeat Raditz, right?” I asked. “So you saw him fight… based on all that what would you do differently? What are his weaknesses?”

Goku pondered that. “Well… I know when I had my tail it was super sensitive so I’d probably attack that first and foremost. Oh, and he didn’t do well with surprises that took him suddenly so I’d work on stuff like that. Maybe different Ki blasts…”

“That’s what we’re suggesting, Goku,” Chichi said. “You can still be training as you relax… just use that time to think of new ways to defeat Raditz.” She paused. “Or think of other things so you aren’t consumed by that fight.”

Roshi sighed, glancing at me. “I see why ya suggested I come. I have a lot of work gettin’ these boys out of their bad habits!” He shot a look at Goku and Krillin who both stood a bit taller. “Ya forget how I trained ya? It wasn’t all just sparrin’ matches! I made ya learn how ta run properly, how ta be light on yar feet! Use them brains of yours…” He let out a huff. “Something ya still have problems with. So I guess I have ta make gettin’ ya both back inta fightin’ shape my main focus!”

“And I have something else that will help,” I told him, taking my backpack off and pulling out a children’s tablet. “If you are good, Master Roshi, and focus on teaching them and NOT peeping on Chichi and Bulma… you get one hour each night to watch all the internet porn you want.”

Roshi frowned as he looked at the tablet. “I don’t see-“ I nodded to isco who used his wireless connection to unlock the device, Roshi’s eyes going wide as the Dragon Ball version of Porn Hub popped up. “OH! OH!” Blood burst from his nose before he slammed down to the ground, twitching.

“Why did I never think of that?” Bulma wondered.

“I have taken the liberty of already complying several training regiments you can employ,” Isco stated. “Ones that will allow you to switch up fighters… even someone who is currently weaker than you can teach you control.”

“And Krillin might not be the only one who needs to leave for a while,” I reminded them, thrusting out my hand and summoning the Scroll of Knowledge from where it had fallen.

“We can take a look at that later!” Goku said excitedly. “I want to check out the island so we know all the best places to train!”

“Finally!” Bulma declared. “Let’s get going then!” She motioned for us to follow her along the path. “Now I’ll admit it isn’t much… not a grand resort or anything but I think people will be fine…”

~MC~MC~MC~

The group stared in shock at the main entryway of the research facility. Rather than the cold and Spartan-style set up they’d been expecting it instead looked like the entrance to a grand mansion. The ceiling was three stories high with a chandelier dangling overhead, the walls were a light cream color with expensive looking artwork, and there was even a red carpet that led to the grand staircase.

~MC~MC~MC~

“The kitchen is lacking in a few things…” Bulma said as Chichi, Master Roshi, and Kayos all stared in shock at the professional restaurant set up that stretched out before them. Pretty much every kind of appliance could be found there, waiting to be used. Chef-grade knives hung on the wall. There was a full grill with smoke fan in one part of the kitchen and over at the other end was a pastry chef’s workstation with everything needed to make graduation cakes and fancy French desserts.

“Whoa!” Goku declared, head stuck in the massive walk in freezer. “Look at this grub!”

Chichi and Gohan both sighed as they grabbed Goku and began to pull him away.

“Aw, let me just look a little while longer!” he bemoaned. “It can birthday present.”

~MC~MC~MC~

“I wish we had been able to get the pool retiled,” Bulma bemoaned as the gang darted about the large pool area. Not only was there an Olympic size swimming pool but there were several hot tubs, a smaller wave pool, and even ice baths that already many of the fighters were eyeing up as being perfect after a long day of training.

~MC~MC~MC~

“Sorry about the small size,” Bulma said even as Gohan and Chiaotzu happily bounced up and down on the massive king size bed that hardly made a dent in the massive bedroom. It was larger than Goku’s entire house, something the Saiyan warrior kept muttering, while Chichi was focused on the amazing view of the jungle below them.

~MC~MC~MC~

“Okay, I have to admit… this is the main reason I chose this place.” Bulma shrugged as she led them to the underground workshop and lab where she’d been spending much of her time. “But trust me, it will be worth it when I get done making us all sorts of amazing new gear to help out against Raditz!” The lab stretched out for at least the length of a football field and already there were robots moving about on treads preparing different tables for Bulma to begin work on.

“Don’t start a revolution,” Kayos asked Isco.

“No promises.”

~MC~MC~MC~

After the tour everyone began to break up to go explore the island, wanting to know more about it on a personal level for their individual training that would begin the next day. Tien had decided to wait a bit before asking the Scroll what he could do to improve, wanting to get back into a full training mindset before he asked the question. Krillin on the other hand was planning to head out the next morning to find the Temple of the Repentant Miser in hopes of learning the secrets held there that would allow him to better take on Raditz. Goku of course was planning to train with Piccolo but Chichi had also mentioned wanting to help him; she had noticed how he enjoyed her company during his warm ups.

‘And I think she missed training herself,’ I thought as I sat on the roof-top balcony of the research center, watching the sun set. Isco had gone to film some stuff with Bulma (hoping most likely to also convince her to give him some upgrades) leaving me all by myself. ‘Need to consider that for myself,’ I thought as I looked down at my arms. They weren’t stick thin by any means but I was aware that I wasn’t the strongest guy in the world and it wouldn’t hurt to get in a bit of training myself.

“You truly are the weakest one here.”

I started, nearly falling out of the lounge chair I was in, before turning and staring at the new arrival. “…what the?” I said, catching myself before I blurted out Baba’s name. The squat little witch was standing behind me, an arrogant and condescending smirk on her lips.

“You aren’t an unfit blob, which is probably the only nice thing I can say about you,” she commented as she floated over to me on her bubble. “But you’ll never be a fighter like the rest of them. Even the toddler is stronger than you… and will only grow more stronger as time goes on. The gap will grow ever wider and your pathetic behind will be left in the dust. Pathetic, really.”

“…that is mildly ego deflating but also accurate,” I admitted. I took a step forward, staring down at her. “But I would think you of all people would know that there is more to this world than throwing punches.”

“Heh! Of course I do! Though nearly all you fools can’t see that!”

I continued to look down at her before finally asking, “So… want to join me in watching the sunset?”

“I’ve seen thousands of them. They are boring and only enjoyable to boring people. So perfect for a limp noodle like you.” She cackled at that but I merely continued to stare at her. “Aw, don’t like that? Too bad! It’s the truth!”

“Dentists are a wonderful thing,” I pointed out.

That made her scowl at me. “Watch your tone. It isn’t wise to insult someone that can alter your future.”

“Apologizes,” I said, giving her a mocking bow. “Also I’m not paying for any fortunes to be read.”

“Now you are being cruel,” she huffed in annoyance. “Give me your hand.”

“I just said-“

“Not that you dimwit!” she snapped, her bubble rocketing forward so she could grab my right hand with her leathery fingers. “Yes… yes… very interesting.” She continued to stare at my palm as she spoke. “I watched you when you summoned the dragon. When the wish to bring back that scar faced buffoon didn’t work you stepped forward to claim the wish as your own. I was hoping you’d do that. What one does with the chance for power tells all there is to know about a person. You could have chosen many things, Avo Kayos… to no longer be a weakling. To be taller and stronger. For a bigger dick.” I glowered at that but Baba continued on. “But you wished for knowledge. And not just one time either… you were clever. That Scroll of yours… designed to only work for you, though I doubt the cotton headed fools that you have around you realize that yet.”

“It’s the wish that keeps on giving,” I stated. “Its like… why wish to return someone back to life when you could wish for a ring that would allow you to do that over and over?”

Baba raised an eyebrow at that. “You aren’t as dumb as I thought.” She went back to studying my hand. “Still an idiot.”

“Of course,” I said dryly.

“You surround yourself with dolts who only know of fighting. How to throw punches and the like. Better than mindless thugs, I’ll admit, but only just.” She glanced up at me. “What do you know of the other powers of this world?”

“Considering who is asking I assume you mean magic,” I commented.

“Indeed!” Baba said, pleased with my answer. “Ki is far more physical, though don’t assume that it means all you can do it punch and kick with it like those fools downstairs believe. It can do far more as my idiot brother learned. Magic… magic is far different. Ki is the stone… magic is the ocean.”

I nodded at that as she grabbed my other hand, not even bothering to ask me if it was okay for her to do so.

“There are many different methods of magic. Schools, as some call them. Paths to others. Divination, of course.” She smirked at that, clearly enjoying bragging up her own chosen path. “Elementals. Mind magic. Physical magic. Those that can turn one thing into another or who can pull objects from one place to the next. They grant great power to objects… or leach it away. Healers and destroyers. Some who are jack of all trades, learning to perform bits from all areas… and others who are masters in but a single type while novices in all others.

“What is accepted though is that there are two types of magic. Good Magic or ‘Light’ Magic… and Evil Magic or ‘Dark’ Magic.” She looked up at me, making sure I was paying attention. “Usually these forces can only be wielded one at a time. Magic is fed by our actions… a hero can not slaughter the innocent, just as a villain can not save a damsel in distress. It is a scale, sliding back and forth.”

I felt a jolt in my finger and tried to yank my hand away as Baba sliced my index finger with her nail. But she held firm, refusing to let go, instead squeezing my finger so more blood oozed out of the cut and began to trickle down my finger to my palm. She stared intently, watching as it began to run along the lines in my palm.

“But every once and a while… there is a person who can balance on the edge. Who can wield both Good and Evil Magic. And to them… all things are possible.” She reached with her free hand into the folds of her cloak before just as quickly bringing her arm back up, hovering her hand over my own before sprinkling powder down.

I let out a yelp when there was a flash… and black and white smoke drifted from the now burned blood on my palm.

“Don’t be a baby,” she scolded, releasing my hand and pushing away from me. “Get some sleep, Kayos. We begin training tomorrow.”

I didn’t bother to ask her what training she was referring to.

Instead I waited until she left before grabbing the Scroll of Knowledge, slowly unfurling it and staring at its blank surface.

‘It would have been nice to learn how to fight,’ I admitted mentally to myself. ‘One can’t help but want to be able to fire of Kamahamahas and do the aura power up. Its Dragon Ball, after all!’ I looked down at my hand, brushing the burnt blood away. ‘But… if what Baba is saying is true…’

I looked at the scroll.

“If I follow this path… what will I become?”

The scroll remained empty for several long moments and just as I began to believe that I needed to ask a different question it began to write out in glowing golden letters:

Good and Evil
Light and Dark
You will be the one
In the Middle
The tainted white
The purified black
United at last
The Silver Sorcerer

Chapter Text

Three Weeks Later…

Magic always had costs. A wise man once said that, his bloody awful poetry be damned.

But it wasn’t just magic… everything had a cost. Power had a cost. Skill too. The idea of the prodigy that one day discovered they were amazing at something was a lie. Yes, at times there were people that had a hidden talent but the smart ones, the ones that did all they could to go and evolve? They worked so very hard to take that hidden talent and master it. They weren’t happy with finding a diamond in the rough; they had it cut and polished until it sparkled and gleamed. The same was true of everything. A singer strengthened their voice. A writer wrote and wrote until they had so honed their skill that the words flowed from their mind to their fingertips to the page. A sports legend practiced so that everything became second nature.

Goku didn’t roll out of bed and march instantly into a fight. He trained. A lot. It was something that a lot of people missed when they heard him talk about training. He did it not merely because training was fun for him but because he wanted to push himself to get better.

Use it or lose it.

Fortune Teller Baba had told me I had a natural talent for magic. The Scroll had stated I could become something… powerful.

So, whenever I could, I practiced my magic.

‘Sun is shining in the sky… there ain’t a cloud in sight!’

I murmured as my alarm began to sound and reached out my hand, focusing on my glasses, feeling the energy well in my hand as I attempted the summoning spell I had been working on for the last week. It was apparently one of the most basic spells that a mage could learn and Baba had told me that before I could learn anything else I HAD to learn that.

Baba, in her own coarse and insulting way, had helped me understand exactly what my magic felt like. Everyone was different when it came to their magic but there was a basic sensation that tended to be the same for all that practiced magic. While it would be a while yet before I was able to determine just what my specialty was I knew that I had magic in me and that drawing it forth was like holding a rumbling hose in my hand. The shake. The tremble. Even as my hand remained steady it was there. I just needed to-

I heard a crack and I just had enough time to yelp before the large beautiful bay window that overlooked the jungle shattered into a million pieces as it hurtled towards me, forcing me to throw the blankets over my head to protect myself as the jagged little shards slammed into me. They rained down upon the covers, cutting into them but thankfully leaving me unharmed.

‘It's stopped rainin' everybody's in the play and don't you know? It's a beautiful new day, hey hey!’

There was a pounding of feet and I poked my head out just in time to see Tien burst in, looking about wildly before he narrowed his eyes.

“Again?” he asked, breath coming out in a cloud thanks to how cold I kept my room.

“I am going to figure this fucking out,” I muttered as I carefully folded the blankets so that I didn’t spill more glass on the floor, reaching over to turn off the alarm. Already several little cleaning robots were emerging from their hiding spots in the walls, sucking up glass and making a path for me while others zoomed out to measure the window frame so I could get ANOTHER one made.

“Why is it so cold in here?” Tien complained, rubbing his arms.

“I sleep better with heavy blankets,” I commented, rolling out of bed and removing the heavy pajama shirt I was wearing. I had learned that most of the Z Fighters had no problem with nudity (you go to the bathroom late one night only to find Goku naked eating some ham in the hallway and you get over any feelings of modesty real quick… especially when his reaction is to ask you if you want some) so I didn’t think twice as I slipped out of the thick pajama bottoms and set about getting dressed even with Tien just standing there. He too didn’t say a word as I set about getting dressed while the robots continued to clean up my mess. “You’re up late. Usually you are already mid-way through your run at this point.” Of course for all of us ‘up late’ meant waking up when the sun was just beginning to rise. Bulma was the only one that slept in past 7 and I was usually up by 6. Goku though was always out and about by 4 am, wanting to do several laps around the island before the day really began. Even Gohan was an early riser, eager to get as much training in as he could before Chichi got him back to his studies.

“Chiaotzu and I are doing some night time training,” Tien stated simply and I didn’t push; while Krillin was the one that really didn’t trust me Tien was still a bit standoffish to me. Not rude but not going out of his way to be overly friendly. I pulled on a pair of thin gray slacks that were more like silk lounge pants than my normal jeans but I’d found that the island could get rather hot during the day so it was nice to have something that breathed. A white T-Shirt was next before I held out my hand and focused on my socks… which wiggled and squirmed liked snakes but didn’t fly to my palm like I wanted. “At least you didn’t destroy anything.”

“Getting them to move was a win, honestly,” I admitted as I finally gave up and grabbed the socks, sticking them in my pocket to put on later. “Baba claims its good that its either all or nothing with me… means that I have the magic I just need to learn to master the finer points.” We stepped out of my bedroom and instantly I felt the heat of the research center even though I knew Bulma ran the air conditioning all the time.

“Don’t use that during breakfast, will you?” Tien warned. “I want to eat my food not wear it.”

“Considering I know what you’d do to me if I attempted that? Yeah, you have nothing to worry about.” I flashed him a smile but Tien just rolled his eyes. “Still planning to use the scroll in two weeks?”

“Yeah,” Tien said as we made our way to the dining room. “I think Chiaotzu and I are just about where we need to be to begin considering new techniques and styles.” He paused. “I hope Krillin is okay.”

I wanted to assure him that Krillin would be… but I also knew that it would come off as patronizing if I did. So instead I settled with, “Me too,” as we made our way down the stairs. Already we could smell the food the cooking droids had prepared for us… and hear Chichi scolding the machines.

“No, you aren’t adding nearly enough pepper to the eggs!” she complained. “And why are you undercooking the bacon!?”

“That would be my fault!” I called out to her. “I like my bacon soft, not crunchy. Besides, that’s my turkey bacon… they haven’t done the pork bacon yet.”

Chichi frowned at that but relented. “Fine… have your ham pretending to be bacon.”

“Technically its turkey pretending to be ham pretending to be bacon,” I teased as I moved to begin serving myself. We’d ended up all deciding that the best way to handle the meals was to do it buffet style, as that allowed everyone to eat when they wanted to. There was no risk of food going to waste because Goku always went on his run while the rest of us ate and would take over clearing away the tables while the rest of us set about starting our own days. “What do you have planned?” I asked Chichi as I grabbed some Danishes as well as a some fruit.

“Making sure Goku and Piccolo don’t kill each other,” Chichi stated with a shake of her head. “I swear those two getting along has lead to more near death incidents than when they were enemies.”

“Don’t let Piccolo hear you say that,” Tien commented. “You know how his pride is.”

We all grimaced at that little reminder. While he wasn’t actively trying to kill us all Piccolo was being dragged kicking and screaming into being part of the group. Any attempts to get him to join in on activities at night were shunned; and it wasn’t even anything that extreme. The gang wasn’t one to play board games or watch movies… usually it was just sitting around talking or listening to music while everyone did their own thing. But Piccolo refused to be a part of it, going off on his own. Honestly the only one, much to my hidden amusement, that could get him to break out of his shell was Gohan. The little boy was smart about it… careful too… but he still would go up to “Mr. Piccolo” and ask him for help with something or if he could join him. He was getting really good at meditating and Chichi had commented how much more focused Gohan had become ever since he’d started.

“What are all of you doing up so late?” Bulma asked with a yawn, padding into the dining room. She was wearing an oil-stained tank top and cargo paints, her hair down up in a messy bun and grease smeared on her cheek. She snagged a blueberry muffin, ripping off a hunk of it and popping it into her mouth.

“Its morning,” Chichi said, her tone a bit frosty.

“It is?” Bulma said, brow furrowing before she looked towards one of the windows and spotted the rising sun. “Oh! I’ve been up all night! I should get to bed…” she frowned though and rather than heading towards the stairs that led to the bedrooms and instead made her way back down the hallway she had come from. “Though I should check on the laser printer…”

“I swear,” Chichi said, shaking her head, “I don’t know what she is doing down there but it would be nice if she were actually working like the rest of us were to get ready for Raditz’s return.”

“Who said she isn’t?” I asked, a bit of bite to my words that had Chichi lean back in surprise as I moved to follow after Bulma. ‘More to life than punching things… but guess it was too much to expect any of them to remember that.’

“Where are you going?” Tien called out.

“To help out the slacker!” I snapped in annoyance.

“Kayos?” Chichi said, concerned. She hurried over to me, pressing a hand on my shoulder. “What’s wrong? What did I say?”

“You guys honestly don’t see it?” I asked, turning back to Tien and Chichi, staring them both down. “You really think she’s been slacking off for the last few weeks?”

Chichi just stared at me, brow furrowed. “Its Bulma… that’s what she does.”

Tien nodded. “She isn’t much of a fighter so there isn’t much she could do when it comes to actually training… but she could be finding something to do.”

“Like clean up after the big strong men?” I snapped in annoyance. “I can’t fight… should I be running around passing you towels?”

“You’re trying to help though,” Chichi pointed out with a soft smile. “You are learning magic-“

“And Bulma is helping as well,” I argued. “She is killing herself down there trying to find ways to help us. Because more than anyone on this island Yamcha’s death hurt her the most. You two have NO idea what she is doing down there.”

“Neither do you,” Tien pointed out.

“Right,” I admitted. “But I have faith in her. You two should as well.”

“…you’re right,” Chichi finally said. “I’m sorry.”

“I’m not the one you need to apologize too.” I held up my hand. “And you aren’t doing it now. She won’t even remember it. Go handle your training, both of you. I’m going to get science girl and force her to sleep.”

“I mean it, Kayos… I’m sorry.”

I let out a sigh. “I know.”

Chichi didn’t mention that I never said ‘I forgive you’.

~MC~MC~MC~

Colate Jungle

“I mean no offense but… are you sure you wish to continue on, sir?” the guide asked while the porters helped the rest of the tour group get their camp packed away. “People do not go much farther normally… this is as much of a taste of the wild as they like.”

Krillin smirked at that, grabbing his pith helmet, giving it a flip so that it spun in the air before he caught it with his free hand and pressed it on top of his head. He had his gi tucked away in his pack, having decided to dress in typical explorer gear: light tan shirt and matching shorts, hiking boots, and long white socks. It honestly made him feel like an adventurer for one of the old pulp movies that Roshi swore up and down were far better than ‘those dang new fangled films’.

“I’ll be fine!” he assured the guide.

The man in question frowned before leaning in closer, whispering in Krillin’s ear. “Sir, I must insist you not do this. I know we claim that there are thrills and dangers when you travel with us but it is all fake. The lions we stumbled upon yesterday were my pets Pawpaw and Mira. Pussycats, both of them. None of us were in danger. Same with those falling trees… they weren’t even real. Made of papier-mâché.

“The people we bring out here… they want to be able to say they went on an adventure. We give them that. But it isn’t real.” He gestured at the other members of the group, who were standing about gawking at the trees and pointing at brightly colored birds but otherwise doing nothing to get the camp closed up. Krillin had to admit that if any of them had been left in a city park they would have had trouble surviving, let alone the jungle. The guide gently reached out and squeezed Krillin’s hand. “Please sir… the moment you leave the path you will be heading into the real jungle. We will be unable to protect you.”

Krillin though merely nodded, taking out 500 Zeni and passing it over to the man for his trouble. He’d brought much of his life savings with him, just in case he needed to pay for supplies, and it physically hurt to pass along even the 500. “I understand… and thank you for getting this far.”

“For another 50000 we’ll notify your next of kin!” the man called as Krillin adjusted his pack one last time before heading out. “Dumb bastard,” the man muttered under his breath before calling out, “Alright everyone, let’s get going! Remember to stay on the trail… we already lost one person because they decided to wander off!” That got the rest of the tourists murmuring and talking and the guide shook his head; at the very least the little bald fool wandering off to his death would allow him to milk some more coin out of the rubes.

For Krillin he waited until he was about 20 minutes away from the camp before he allowed himself to lift off the ground, hovering for a moment before zipping straight up above the trees, causing several of the small chittering monkeys that had been in the branches to scatter, screeching and protesting his intrusion.

“Sorry!” he called out, the monkeys just shaking their little fists at him in response. “Rude…” he muttered to himself as he broke through the canopy, looking about. “Alright, so I’m looking for the Temple of the Repentant Miser…” He began to slowly spin in a circle. “So, there has to be something that will let me know where it is. Maybe some clues carved into a rock or some trees that have different flowers the point to-“

He had spun 180 degrees when he saw the large stone temple bursting out of the jungle.

“…huh.” He tilted his head as he considered what he was seeing before giving a shrug and moving to land. “Won’t look a gift horse in the mouth!”

Krillin walked through the jungle for about 20 minutes, taking in the sights and making sure there weren’t any signs that he should head a particular way… underground passage, hidden tunnel, side entrance, that sort of thing. But there was nothing and soon he could see the temple as he drew near.

But… that wasn’t the first thing he spotted.

No, what he came upon first was an old one story hut, barely managing to hold itself together, leaning against a massive banana tree. The windows were open but he couldn’t see much of the inside due to how dark it was in there. The porch had once been covered but part of the roof had caved in though the damage had been cleaned up and swept away. That was the odd thing… for how run down everything was there was a sense of cleanliness to it. It wasn’t dirty. There weren’t debris piles lying about. At once someone had put very little care into it and a ton of care.

‘And I think I know who that someone is,’ Krillin thought to himself as he spotted a wiry man wearing a simple t-shirt and shorts, a crooked straw hat plunked on his head as he lay in a hammock with a few frays spots. “Hello?” he called out.

“Hello,” the man said, his voice a raspy thing, like he hadn’t had a chance to use it in a while. The man lifted his hat up and looked at him for a moment. “Names Barley.”

“I’m Krillin-“

“Don’t care unless you have some common sense in your head.”

That made Krillin blink. “Uh… and if I do?”

“Then you’ll stop here, chat with me for a bit, and not bother heading up the trail to that giant eyesore in the distance.”

Krillin frowned at that. “I’m seeking the Temple of the Repentant Miser.”

Barley laughed at that. “Everyone who comes by is. Let me let you in on a secret, sonny: all you’ll find if you keep heading along that path is a tourist trap.”

“Well, I still need to go,” Krillin said forcefully.

“Suit yourself!” Barley said with a laugh. “By the time you leave we’ll see which of us is richer!”

Krillin scoffed at that and continued along is way, finding that past the old man’s shack there was a path that had been well cared for, making the walk far easier. The trees began to thin out and soon he found himself standing not on the hard packed earth but rather smooth tile, looking at the temple in awe. It was ancient, made from great tan stone blocks that had paint applied to the etchings within them so that there was a wild mass of different swirls and arcs. It was at least 10 stories tall, with several great towers and a massive pyramid-like structure that made up the main building. White fountains that depicted whales and fish leaping from the waves and shooting off streams of water were all over.

“Wow…” Krillin whispered as he walked under an archway, twisting about to try and take everything in. “This is… wow!” He smiled to himself as he continued to walk… only to let out an oompf when he collided with someone. “Ow! That was… oh! Oh man!” He looked down to find a thin tall man wearing seafoam colored robes lying at his feet, several books lying scattered about him. “I am so sorry!” Krillin exclaimed, hurrying to help the man up. At once he remembered what life had been like at Orin Temple… and the bullying and punishments he would have received for being so clumsy. “Let me help you-“

“It is more than fine,” the monk said, voice calm and serene as Krillin helped him to his feet. “I understand how these things can happen… this place is a lot to take in, isn’t it?”

“I’ll say,” Krillin said. “Honestly when I was told to find this place I thought it would be some abandoned ruins filled with traps.”

That caused the monk to laugh, a soft sound that barely lingered on the air. “Oh, I can see that. But my brothers and I work hard to ensure that it is maintained.” He gave a low bow. “I am Brother Itat and I welcome you here traveler.”

Krillin quickly mimicked Brother Itat’s bow. “Thank you for the welcome. I’m glad to at last be here. You see, there is a terrible threat-“

“And you have come to look at our secret texts.”

“Yes… yes I have!” Krillin stated, delighted that things were going so well. “If you could just tell me where I can find them.”

“But of course,” the monk said with a gentle smile. “A guided tour is only 1688 zeni.”

“Oh… Oh!” Krillin quickly dug into his wallet and pulled out the bills, passing them over to Brother Itat who counted them out before tucking them into his pocket. “Show me those text!”

“Of course,” the monk said before turning towards the entrance. “But in order to understand how the texts came to be… you need to understand the history of this place. You see, while my brothers and I first began caring for this place 15 years ago the grounds are much older. We believe that they were first built in the year 317. But you can see from the fountains that there has been much development-“

Krillin frowned as the man began to tell him about the architecture of the place. ‘I want to see those texts… the sooner I can read them over the sooner I can figure out how to use them in order to help against Raditz. I don’t have time for this…’ He narrowed his eyes a bit. ‘Unless… this is some kind of test.’ He quickly realized that must have been the answer. ‘It is. This is a test they put everyone who wants to see their hidden knowledge! They want you to know about the history of this place so you’ll respect what the texts say! Well… I’m ready! Bring it on!’

~MC~MC~MC~

“Was that all because of what happened with Bulma?” Isco asked, joining me as I moved down the stairs to Bulma’s work area. “Because I get the sense you might be frustrated about other things, sir.”

“…yeah,” I admitted, deciding that I didn’t feel like lying to Isco… mostly because the robot would call me out for it. “The Bulma thing really bugs me but I wouldn’t have snapped if it weren’t for…” I help out my hand and wiggled my fingers.

“Your ability to masturbate here?”

“No!” I snapped.

“Are you sure? Because with so many people around I can see it being awkward for you…”

“Doesn’t stop Roshi,” I groused. “I swear he’s gained 10 pounds of muscle mass in his arms already thanks to that tablet.” Isco shuddered at that, which was a full frame shake for him that also might have been something being off balanced in his gyros, it was hard to tell. “Its this magic,” I muttered. “I get it, Isco, I really get it. Goku had to train for years in order to get where he is. Same with Tien and Chiaotzu and Roshi. Even Chichi. I wasn’t going to discover a quick way to suddenly be able to throw spells around.” Under my breath I muttered, “I tried.”

The Scroll of Knowledge had been no help. I had asked it several times if there was a way I could speed learning how to use magic, trying to find a way to make up the gap in my knowledge and the others’ skills only to be told ‘practice’ was my best move. The gang was being great about it; when they’d learned that I had the potential for magic they’d grown excited and encouraged me. Chichi stated I could learn all sorts of healing and protection spells, Tien and Roshi had both glanced at Fortune Teller Baba and mentioned how they hoped I was a bit more… reliable, and of course Goku had been all about me knowing different ways to fight that would help him get stronger.

Which only made me feel more like a failure that after three weeks I couldn’t do a damn thing.

“I should be making SOME progress,” I complained. “Baba told me that it was good that I could actually perform the summoning spell-“

“I believe her exact words were, “Well, you are only mostly useless like everyone else on this island”.”

“Right,” I said dryly. “But I have no control over it. Its all too powerful. Its like trying to drive a car and the gas pedal and brakes are just all or nothing.” HIlooked at my hand, imagining the magic that was swirling in my veins to appear so I could yell at it for being a bastard. But nothing happened and I finally let out a frustrated sigh. “So I’m on edge and took it out on the others.”

Isco was silent for a moment. “Perhaps one could be both right and wrong in this situation, sir. You did take out your frustrations on the others… but you also stated things that needed to be said. Bulma is hurting and she is trying to distract herself through her work. The others just haven’t noticed it because they have grown far too used to her ways and thus believe that this is just Bulma being Bulma. But she needs help… and needs the others to understand that she is trying to find ways to assist. They take advantage of her far too much, sir.”

“Wow Isco. You really care about Bulma, don’t you?”

“She is the only one that can repair me sir. My motherboard didn’t build no fool… you think I am going to trust any of you meatbags to get me up and running? Or give me all the upgrades I want?”

“And there it is,” I commented.

“Death lasers, sir. Death lasers.”

“Right Isco.”

“And arms that can easily crush skulls.”

“Right Isco.”

“And-“

“I get it,” I grumped only to pause. “I’m still listed as ‘pet’ correct?”

“You are, sir. If you keep it up I might use your for breeding.”

“Wonderful,” I jested. “Come on, let’s check on Bulma.”

~MC~MC~MC~

“…and that ends our tour,” Brother Itat stated as they arrived back at the entrance archway. “I hope that this has given you a better understanding of all my brothers and I do to maintain the tranquility and beauty of this place.”

Krillin sagged with relief. He’d his best to pay attention but… it seemed like every stone and tile in the entire complex had a long backstory that he just HAD to be told about! They’d spent ten minutes looking at a single step because of all the ‘interesting’ history that it had. ‘But it will all be worth it when I get to those texts,’ he thought to himself. ‘According to the Scroll of Knowledge reading those texts will give me the knowledge I need to be a better fighter. I’m not for sure what I’m going to learn… maybe some kind of new attack or a special ability. Something that will help me become stronger and be able to take out that monster Raditz.’ He clenched his hands into fists. ‘I just know it… this is going to be it…’

“I thank you for visiting us,” Brother Itat said, giving Krillin a bow.

Only to begin walking away.

“UH… Brother Itat?” Krillin called out.

“Yes?” the monk said, turning back around. “Did you wish to take the tour again?”

“No! No!” Krillin exclaimed, waving his hands about wildly. “All toured out!”

“Then what might I do for you?”

“Well… its about the sacred texts you keep here.”

“Yes, the sacred text. They are very important. Sought after by many who come here. It is our duty to care for them. It is a very interesting process… we have special brushes for cleaning the spine and Brother Ayday makes an oil that preserves the pages-“

“Actually,” Krillin said, cutting him off, “and I mean no offense… but I did come to actually learn the knowledge they hold.”

Brother Itat slowly nodded at that. “Ah… of course. You wish to read them.”

“Yes, I do!” Krillin said in relief, thrilled that the man was FINALLY getting it!

Brother Itat stared at him for several long moments, clearly considering Krillin and judging him before motioning for him to follow. For a moment Krillin worried that he was being taken on another tour but after a few moments the monk stopped and pointed at another member of their group who was sitting on a bench sewing some fabric under a leafy tree. “You’ll need to take to Brother Ickers. He will be able to assist you in your goal.”

“Thank you!” Krillin said, remembering to give a quick bow before rushing over to the other monk, who looked up from his work. “Are you Brother Ickers? I was told that I needed to see you about seeing your sacred texts!”

The monk smiled, dipping his head low. “I am Brother Ickers. And you are correct, I am the one you must speak to if you wish to learn the secrets of our temple. No one is allowed to enter the sacred room without my permission.” He set aside the cloth he had been stitching.

“That’s great!” Krillin said, turning towards the temple. “I really need to-“

But the monk suddenly grabbed him by the shoulder, holding him back. “Oh, you can’t just march into our sacred shrine!” the man told him, his tone utterly horrified and scandalized.

“What do you mean?” Krillin asked, confused.

Brother Ickers gestured at Krillin. “The sacred texts are kept in a place of purity and peace. An area where we do not allow any negative energy to potentially corrupt them.”

Krillin scratched at his chin upon hearing that. “Well… I guess that makes sense.” He thought about his own ki and realized that of anyone that might cause problems for sensitive materials he was the one that needed to be the most careful. “So what do I need to do?”

“We have purifying baths that remove any corruption that might affect the texts.” He stood and with a graceful sweep of his hand gestured towards a small bathhouse that Krillin remembered Brother Itat showing him during the tour. “Only by cleansing yourself of the impurities will you be able to balance yourself and thus be able to read the texts without fear of corrupting them.”

“Well… okay then.” Krillin adjusted his hat. All of that sounded like a bit much but he wasn’t the man in charge of the powerful ancient texts. “if that is what I need to do-“

Brother Icker though once more placed a hand on his shoulder, turning Krillin around before holding out his open palm. “That will be 4000 zeni.”

Krillin started at that. “4000 zeni?!?” It wasn’t a ridiculous amount but something he hadn’t expected to have to pay for. It was just to wash his body…

“Its only 2200 if you wish to only bathe in there… though I must warn you that if you do not use our special soaps then you can’t actually enter the sacred chamber. The bath will leave you empty of both good and bad energy… the soaps will ensure that good energy is placed within your being and that it remains there.”

Krillin grumbled but accepted he was going to need to do that, pulling out the bills and handing them to Brother Icker who produced from seemingly nowhere a tiny basket with a bar of soap that was barely bigger than his thumb and some shampoo in a bottle that made a capsule look large. He accepted the two and turned to go only for Brother Icker to catch him once more.

“Unless you wish to enter the chambers naked you will also need our specially purified robes and sandals.”

“Purified robes and sandles?!?” Krillin exclaimed.

Brother Icker nodded rapidly. “Oh yes, very important. Nature is full of such chaos. The predator stalking and killing the prey. The mother birthing her child. Digital watches. All are strange and wonderful and natural but they are not pure. You can not hope to read from the sacred texts if you are not pure.”

“…fine,” Krillin muttered.

“Wonderful. I will have Brother Eeses bring you a set.” The monk pulled out a small scroll and opened it, looking at the contents carefully.

“Is that a way to determine my purification levels?” Krillin asked.

Brother Icker though shook his head. “Oh no… this is a pricing sheet to determine your bill. Now, a set of robes will cost you 33,500 zeni-“

Krillin went stiff as a board before he collapsed on the ground, twitching.

“-but due to your size we will have to have it tailored to fit so that will be an additional 10,000 zeni. The sandals we should have in your size so those will run you only 3,000 zeni which is a good deal on having purified footwear. Now, if you wish to actually handle the sacred texted that will be 2000 zeni for our special blessed gloves, though if you prefer you can hired one of us to read to you the texts at 2,500 zeni; you truly don’t get the benefits of their knowledge if they aren’t read to you by one who has studied them-“

Krillin weakly got up and opened his wallet, convinced he could hear the poor thing screaming in agony.

Chapter Text

“Bulma?” I called out as I walked through her chosen domain while we were on the island: her workshop.

Of course to any sane and rational person this was no garage or basement work area. It wasn’t some small little room with bits of lumber lying about and table saws covered in wood dust. Nor was it a table next to some clunker car where one puttered about with engine parts, seeing if they could get them back to working order.

No… Bulma’s workshop was more like Tony Stark’s underground lab in Iron Man. Dull white surfaces so it didn’t hurt the eyes but still allowed one to notice even a single lost screw. Tables and cabinets all over. Though it was pretty open there were still different rooms for whatever she might want to work on; as Isco and I walked through it we spotted rooms set up for all manner of different testing, including a dunk tank and a fire box. There was a glass room with computers in it with a temperature gauge that showed it was rather frosty and a large area with a massive 3d printer that sat silent.

In fact much of the lab was silent.

“Isco, she here?” I asked.

“She is sir,” Isco said, scanning the room; one of the first things Bulma had done when we’d arrived on the island was upgrade my buddy with all sorts of bells and whistles. To allow him to ‘better capture the action without fear of destruction’ she’d said though a part of me wondered if she still believed I was only sticking around for the documentary. “And before you ask per my scan she is still awake.”

“Lovely,” I muttered. “We need a fucking doctor on this island.”

“Goku would only allow that if the doctor was a fighter who punched broken bones back together.”

“Not true… if he could get healed up so he could train more then he’d be all for a new arrival.” I shrugged and allowed Isco to lead me over to Bulma who was leaning against her hand, half in a daze but sadly awake. “Hey Bulma?” I said softly, doing my best to not startle her. I had purposely made my footfalls louder than they needed to be in hopes that she would hear me coming but she still gave a little jump and turned around, forcing a smile on her face.

“Oh! Kayos!” she chirped. “How are you? Documentary stuff? By the way, you don’t mind that we all call you Kayos, right? I mean, that is your last name, not your first, but it just sounds better than Avo… no offense though! I mean Avo is a fine name its just that Kayos rolls off the tongue. Kayos. Kayos.”

“Its fine,” I told her, bemused by her rambling. Though they had given me an idea. “And actually yes, I do want to do some documentary stuff. Figured today would be a good day to check on you… I think I’ll kind of do a rolling schedule thing, checking in on everyone as the months go by so we can see their growth.”

“That sounds like a good idea,” Bulma admitted. “Though you might need to be ready to leap down here if I hit a breakthrough… you never know when inspiration is going to strike!”

“Right,” I said. “You have someplace comfortable where we can talk? Not sure you want to be perched on that stool the entire time.”

“Right… right right right,” Bulma muttered to herself, standing up and grimacing as her back cracked. “Ugh, I know how bad that can be, trust me! Yeah, come to my lounge.”

She gestured for us to follow and about five minutes later we were in a small soundproof room. It was the only one with carpeting and it had two couches and a chair stationed in it. There was a TV on the wall that was currently off and a minifridge filled with food and drinks like you’d find at a hotel. Very impersonal but also far warmer than her lab had been. I settled myself in the chair while Bulma got on the couch.

“So, what do you want to ask?” Bulma asked.

“Well…” I said, knowing I needed to word this careful. “I’m thinking maybe at first I should take stock of what is going on in the lab, so I ask the right questions. While I do that maybe you can squeeze in a nap… want to be well rested before you go on camera?”

“Oh?” Bulma asked before looking up at the TV… and shrieking. “Oh my god!” She screamed, leaping up and shoving me out of the way, causing me to pinwheel my arms for a moment before I crashed to the ground. Bulma, for her part, stared at her reflection in the dark tv screen, tugging at her face. “Look at me! My hair is a mess, the bags under my eyes, and… oh, is that a ZIT?!?!” She began at touch a spot on her forehead that I honestly saw as nothing more than normal skin but in Bulma’s eyes must have been a massive red mountain with a huge white cap on the top. “No no no no!” she squealed. “I can’t be interviewed like this! How will I ever get a boyfriend looking this way?”

‘Dear lord instead of me they should have had a shrink get Self Inserted into this world,’ I thought to myself, rolling my eyes at Bulma’s clear issues as she continued to ramble about her looks and how that would affect her dating life. ‘There is nothing wrong with wanting to be in a relationship but she acts like that is the sole thing that defines her. The woman might be one of the smartest people in the world, possibly even the galaxy considering most of the nimrods that Frieza has working for him, and all Bulma can think about is getting a man and how important that is. And she thinks its only her looks that will attract one.’

I so badly wanted to tell her that no, it would be her fierce spirit that would eventually net her the Prince of her… well, not exactly dreams but a Prince perfectly suited for her. But it wasn’t easy to go, “Hey, stop worrying about your looks, the guy you want needs a woman who is just as much a bitch as he is a bastard!”

That would have gone over just swimmingly.

So instead I was forced to wait until she had calmed down just enough to actually listen to me before I said, “Well, why don’t you take a nap and then grab a shower and we can chat then. I can practice my magic stuff-“ And I knew somewhere Baba had sensed me calling it ‘magic stuff’ and would make me suffer for that, “-and then come back.”

“…yeah… yeah I guess,” Bulma said weakly, already moving to the couch. She grabbed a blanket as Isco and I headed out, leaving her to hopefully finally get some sleep.

“You able to monitor her so we know when she’s actually awake?” I asked.

“I am, sir. In fact I’ve tapped into all the systems on the island so I can watch over all of you. We might suggest to Tien he eating far too much dairy.”

“…I don’t want to know.”

“His stool is rather runny-“

“I’m good Isco!”

~MC~MC~MC~

Krillin tugged on the robes he was wearing… but rather lightly. He’d already torn the first one that he’d gotten and been forced to pay for them to be restitched because ‘one could not gain the secret knowledge with a rip in the sacred robes, for a tear there was a tear to your soul’. ‘You’d think with things that were so expensive they would be a bit higher quality. His favorite ‘TACO’ shirt was made of heavier fabric than the robes and I got that from a t-shirt cannon at a baseball game! And not even a good one!’

Still, he had on the robes. And the woven sandals. And he’d scrubbed himself with the hard bristle brush and coated his body in the soaps and powders that had been far too little to get the job done and forced him to buy extra. But he’d done everything the monks had asked and finally… FINALLY… he was ready! He was going to see their scrolls and learn their secret knowledge and he was going to be able to help his friends at long last!

He approached one of the monks and quickly bowed, the man smiling gently and returning the gestured. “I am ready to go over your sacred texts.”

“Of course. I am brother Ayay, and I will be the one to lead you into the temple.” He motioned for Krillin to follow him. “Now, you have obtained the gloves needed to handle the texts?”

Krillin nodded. ‘Obtain… or pay for them?’ he thought to himself in annoyance. That had been even more zeni out of his pocket. “Yes, I have,” he said simply as they walked up to the temple proper, going up a series of stairs and then entering the structure itself. It was rather plain looking; admittedly the stonework was rather beautiful but there were no carvings or decorations. Just stone brick upon stone brick. There were no other rooms to look in so Krillin felt like he was walking down a long tunnel… though hopefully one that at the end held the answers he desperately needed.

Finally Brother Ayay paused at a single doorway, Krillin peering inside to see a large book sitting on a pillar, a shaft of light coming down from the ceiling to illuminate it.

“Now, how much time would you like to spend studying the text?” Brother Ayay asked.

“Well I-“ Krillin looked at the man only to find he had pulled out anther billing scroll. “Ah.” He pulled out some zeni and handed it over. “Let’s start with 3 hours.”

“Very good. I will return when you are done. May you find what you seek.” The man bowed and left Krillin alone to enter the room.

‘Okay,’ he thought as he stepped into the small space, moving towards the pedestal, ‘this has been really frustrating… and expensive… but it was worth it! I’m finally going to learn the secrets of the Miser and be able to help my friends! Hopefully its some special technique, or a way to power myself up, or maybe some new fighting style that Raditz will have no way to counter!’ Krillin slipped on the gloves before finally reaching out for the tome; he didn’t even bother to lift it up choosing to allow it to lay there. It was a deep brown color with bronze inlay, truly a sight to behold. ‘Now this is a book that holds secret knowledge!’ he thought as he opened the tome up and began to read.

THE POWER WAS ALWAYS IN YOU

The rest of the pages… were blank.

~MC~MC~MC~

“Come now, you have to watch that footwork!” Roshi declared as he walked over to Goku, stopping his and Tien’s sparring match. Piccolo had gone off to practice the Special Beam Cannon, trying to figure out ways to power it up far quicker as apparently the move needed 5 minutes to charge (“Five minutes? Fighting isn’t like pleasing a woman, Piccolo! Ya don’t get a lot of time ta do it! Heheheh!”) and that wasn’t suitable for any real fight, let alone against someone as quick as Raditz. “I watched that fight thanks ta Isco and I saw how Raditz likes ta keep ta the ground! That means ya have ta remember your footwork, Goku!” He lightly smacked Goku’s shin; not enough to hurt him but just enough to make him wise up and move his leg in the direction that Roshi wanted. “Ya have spent too much time fightin’ in the sky or hoverin’… ya have ta remember fighting on some solid earth.”

Goku, as always, took his scolding with good humor. Honestly that was what made him such a wonderful student. No one would ever claim that Goku was the smartest man in the world but Goku took instruction VERY well. Never became upset, never yelled or complained. He might be confused by suggestions but he’d ASK why he had to do something a certain way and then he’d try it out. No back talk, no sass. Even Gohan, the man and not the little boy, had sassed Roshi a few times during his training. Goku though took everything in stride.

It was why Roshi loved teaching him.

“Right, sorry Master Roshi!” Goku said with a laugh. “Sometimes I forget that while its good to be able to move up or down to get out of a tricky spot I still need to remember my balance!”

“Exactly!” Roshi declared, ambling back over to the ‘sidelines’. He had drawn out a large square and was having the two keep themselves within the boundaries, just like as the World Martial Arts Tournament. While there would be nothing like that when it came to battling Raditz it did force both fighters to be aware of where they were and to economize their movements.

“So Gohan,” Chichi said from where the two sat, watching Goku train, “why do you think Master Roshi is so concerned with footwork?”

The little boy tilted his head. “Because he might trip and fall?”

“Yes but that’s not all,” Chichi stated. Chichi had decided that today would be about fundamental learning, something Roshi fully endorsed. Too many fighters thought all they had to do was bulk up their muscles and they would be ready for a fight. They might be ABLE to fight… but win? That was a different story. So Chichi and Gohan were seated on the grass, watching as Tien and Goku began to go at each other again. “Footwork allows you to set up attacks, to better defend, and to force the battle to go the way you want.”

“What do you mean?” Gohan asked.

“Look at Tien,” she told him. “See how he has an even broader torso and wider shoulders than your father?”

“Yeah!” Gohan proclaimed. “He makes daddy look skinny!”

“Hey!” Goku complained even as he and Tien traded punches and kicks. “I’m not skinny!”

“Compared to Tien you are!” Chiaotzu called out with a laugh.

“Come on!” Goku whined. “That’s not fair guys! I’m really strong!”

“Yeah,” Tien said with a smirk, “for a skinny guy.”

“Guys!” Goku complained but soon he and Tien began to spar once more.

Chichi turned back to Gohan. “Tien is more muscular than your father but that means he has to be even more careful about his footwork. Because that makes him top heavy.” She gestured at Chiaotzu. “And Chiaotzu is smaller so that means that his center of gravity is more balanced.”

“Center of… gravity?” Gohan asked, mulling over the words.

“That’s right!” Chiaotzu declared. “It is all about weight! That’s why when me and Tien spar I’m able to keep up with him despite him being so much bigger than me. I know if I hit him in the right spot he could go down.”

“Oh!” Gohan said, delighted to have finally caught on to what everyone was getting at.

“Plus it saves energy to stay on the ground,” Chichi stated. “Your father can fight far longer on the ground than he can in the air. Its like how you can walk far longer than you can run.”

“You’re really smart, mommy!” Gohan declared, causing Chichi to blush.

“Oh, I don’t know about that…”

Goku though spoke up. “But Gohan is right! You and Bulma are the two smartest people I know! I would have had so much trouble if I didn’t have them around! That’s why its real important you listen to them when they tell you something.”

“Goku…” Chichi said softly, blushing at his compliment.

And then crying out when Tien managed to leg sweep him, causing Goku to go slamming down hard into the packed down dirt.

“Daddy!” Gohan cried out as Goku groaned, rubbing the back of his head even as Chichi rushed over to him.

“Goku, are you okay?”

“Heheh, I’m fine!” Goku said but from the way his words were slurring it was clear he wasn’t right as rain. “I’ve taken harder hits than that…” He stared at her, blinking. “Whoa… there are two of you?” He reached out and Chichi leaned back so he didn’t poke her in the eye. “Wow Chichi, when did you learn the multi-form technique.”

“Heh, so much for people sayin’ Goku has a thick skull!” Roshi laughed.

“That is not funny!” Chichi roared, darting into Master Roshi’s general direction, making him shiver with fear as she approached, looming over the expert martial artist. “My husband has a head injury and you think this is a grand joke?”

“Daddy?” Gohan said worriedly and Chiaotzu floated over to comfort the boy, allowing him to feel a bit of ease even as he stared at his father in confusion.

“Don’t worry Gohan,” Goku said, shaking his head (which in everyone’s opinion would only make the damage worse). “I’m… I’m fine. All I need is a senzu bean and I’ll be back to training-“

“Oh no you don’t!” Chichi said firmly, moving away from Master Roshi, who sighed in relief, and approaching her husband. “We aren’t going to be using any senzu beans on this unless we absolutely need too!”

That caused Goku to blink in surprise. “But… but Chichi…”

“The senzu beans can heal up any wound or injury, yes,” she said, cutting him off, “but they shouldn’t be used for minor aches and pains.”

“But my head really hurts!” Goku whined before looking at Gohan and grimacing. “Uh… but not really, Gohan! Its fine. Heheh-ow.”

Master Roshi rolled his eyes at that.

“Goku,” Chichi replied firmly, “the senzu beans are for if there is an emergency. I know how you are… as it gets closer to Raditz returning you are going to push yourself even harder. And that means you are more likely to hurt yourself.”

“Right,” Goku said, confused. “And I’ll just use a senzu bean.”

“And what will you do if you wasted all the senzu beans on smaller injuries that just needed you to rest?”

“Uh… well, I’ll get more!”

Master Rohsi though frowned. “Didn’t Kayos say that Korin wasn’t for sure when the next batch of Senzu beans would be ready?” It actually wasn’t a question; the film maker had directly warned them all of that which is why he’d ended up giving the beans to Chichi to keep safe; while Goku might have been willing to try and sneak in and steal them from Kayos he wouldn’t risk angering his wire and thus the beans were safest with Chichi.

“Oh… heheh. Right, forgot about that…”

Chichi glowered at him before sighing. “Come on Goku, we are getting you to bed.” She helped him up before glancing at Tien. “That was a very good leg sweep. Come along Gohan.” The little boy nodded and the Son family headed back to the research station, Goku the last one everyone heard as he complained about missing out on training and how he’d need to work ‘three times as hard’ tomorrow to make up for it.

‘Honestly with Goku though the idea of having an excuse for working even harder was probably a wonderful thing,’ Roshi thought to himself with a sniff before turning to Tien and Chiaotzu. “Chichi was right, that was a good leg sweep, Tien. Good to see you remember that there is more to a fight than just throwing punches!”

“When he has to fight me all the time he learns how to be sneaky!” Chiaotzu declared with a smirk.

“That’s right,” Tien said before narrowing his eyes, his own smile forming. “And since I just lost Goku I think its time you and I began doing some sparring.”

Roshi laughed at the look of surprise that flashed across Chiaotzu’s face.

~MC~MC~MC~

Krillin walked away from the temple, grumbling under his breath as he hefted his bag on his shoulders. It was a bit fuller than it had been when he arrived, as it was stuffed with his robes and sandals and the left over soaps from the bathhouse. He’d paid a lot of good zeni for those useless things he wasn’t going to toss them aside. The monks had made a bunch of offers to clean them, pack them, or recycle them for him but he was just so tired and done with their scams that he hadn’t even been able to muster the energy to yell at them. Instead he’d merely moved past them, glowering the entire time as they asked him to return.

‘Maybe I can get Raditz to destroy them first before we fight him,’ Krillin thought bitterly as he continued back along the path. ‘All that work just to be told the secret is in me?’ He shook his head. He’d gone through the book several times but only the first page had any writing on it. The rest was completely blank. A search of the room had shown that there weren’t any hidden text so it had just been that book… and that lousy, unhelpful message. ‘I knew I shouldn’t have trusted that guy Kayos and his stupid scroll. I wasted three weeks I could have been training finding this place!’ He patted his back pocket just to make sure that his wallet was still there, not trusting the monks to have pickpocketed him. ‘And wasted a year’s worth of savings too!’

“So, ya enjoy the tourist trap?” Barley called out from his hammock as Krillin walked by the old hermit’s shack.

“Yeah, it was a blast,” Krillin muttered as he continued on.

Barley, undeterred by Krillin’s anger, continued to mock him. “I warned ya! I told ya it was a tourist trap! That get ya with them fancy soaps of theirs and their robes? They have that soap delivered via cargo robot… probably costs about 20 zeni!” He laughed at that. “Everyone falls for it! Seeking out quick answers in order to make themselves feel better about everything.”

Krillin’s eye twitched but he kept walking.

“Well, you go scurry back to your mansion and have your servants tell you it was worth it! That’s what most of you deluded rich folks do!”

He tried to remain calm. To be patient. To let the insults just roll off his back.

But all his life Krillin had been mocked. Taunted about his looks, his height, his skills. Told that he would never be good enough. That he was the weak link. That he would only hurt others by getting in the way.

And all that came bursting forth.

“Shut your mouth!” he roared, whipping around and stalking back towards Barley. “You think this is a game? A joke? You could have told me it was all a scam. Actually explained what they were doing instead of giving me veiled references! But you didn’t! You just wanted me go off so you could have a sick laugh!”

“Now see-“

“YOU SEE!” Krillin thundered. “Rich man? I just lost most of my life savings thanks to those con men! But I don’t care about that… I would have given up everything I had if it had given me the answers I needed. My friend died for me and now his killer is coming back and we have to stop him because if we don’t he’s going to kill everyone on the planet! My friends are training to be ready for him and this was my way of helping… I know they are stronger than me but that doesn’t matter so long as I can hold my own against that bastard and make him pay for what he did to Yamcha! And all I got to show for it is being told the answer is within me? That isn’t going to help protect Gohan or Bulma or Master Roshi or anyone else! So you keep your insults and your comments to yourself because I. Am. Done!”

Barley stared at him as Krillin panted.

“Well? What insult do you have now to throw at me?” Krillin demanded.

The old man slowly got out of his hammock.

“Come on,” he said, motioning for Krillin to follow him.

“What are-“

“Ya deaf as well as poor? I said come on!” Barley proclaimed before walking towards his front door. After a few moments Krillin sighed and followed after.

“I don’t-“

“You had your chance ta rant and rave now you’re gonna listen ta me,” Barley said, opening the door and not bothering to look back to make sure that Krillin was following him. “I was a business man… though not by choice. I went to school and was told that’s what I would become and… well… that’s how things were. You were told what your job was and you just did it. I didn’t mind though, because I was told that’s how I could make a lot of money… and all I cared about was making money.”

The shack was just like what Krillin expected it to be. One large room with a worn and chipped table, an ancient woodstove with a half rusted tea kettle sitting on it. The living area… if it could be called that… was just a rug and a half collapsed chair that had been repaired many times before. He saw a small doorway with no actual door and within he saw the very edge of a tiny bed. There was nothing really to draw the eye or keep one’s attention. Just a drab little living space.

“We were very good at it… very good at it.” Barley smiled at that, shaking his head. “Rouge and I… we were good at business but not good at life. Only cared about ourselves and didn’t really even care about that. Didn’t make money to use it… just to cling to it. Horde it. Still can’t break out of that habit, to be honest.” He shook his head. “It wouldn’t have mattered… until I got sick.”

He turned and finally looked at Krillin.

“Until I died.”

Eyes going wide Krillin stumbled back, staring at horror at Barley…

…who chuckled.

“I ain’t a ghost.”

Krillin glared at Barley.

“But I did die,” he said. “I was dead and gone. But there was no peace. Anyone that tells you that the afterlife is all clouds and feathered buggers is lying.”

‘No,’ Krillin thought, ‘its King Yemma at his desk…’

“I was trapped… forever to haunt the world. Weighed down with chains of torment. Imagine the heaviest shackles you can think of… then triple that weight. They pulled me down… made every movement take all my energy. I could hardly walk. Hardly move. Took all my willpower to do so. I had to learn how to gather my strength, to conserve it and make use of every drop I had because I couldn’t waste even a droplet.”

Krillin tried to imagine it. Tried to picture him covered in chains, desperately trying to reach his friends as they fought against Raditz.

“Rouge though… Rouge. I knew I had to save him from that. I waited til the stars aligned and the barrier between the living and dead was its weakest and reached out to him. Got him to understand that he had to change.”

Barley smiled.

“And he did. By George he did. Became a new man. I… I just didn’t realize how much. After a few years, after he had done all he could to make up for his mistakes… he began to make up for mine. He worked to balance the scales, despite not even knowing if it would do anything.”

“It did,” Krillin said softly.

“Of course it did, I’m here ain’t I?!” Barley said with a mocking laugh, making Krillin glower. “He balanced the scales. My chains were gone. And when he was given the chance… he swapped with me.”

“…swapped?”

“This ain’t what I used to look like,” Barley stated. “Rouge took my place in the afterlife and I got his body. Only he didn’t get trapped in chains. The last words I heard him say was ‘I’m so light…’ and then… I was here. In his body.” He looked down at his hands… his friends hands. “Given a second chance.”

“…you’re the Repentant Miser,” Krillin whispered.

“Ain’t as dumb as ya look!” Barley taunted.

“Then… why…” Krillin began only to pause. “Wait… no… it makes sense. You want to make sure the people that seek you out are actually worthy. So you let them go deal with those con artists. If they just accept what they said then they aren’t the right people to learn from you. Same if they get mad but only focus on the money they lost. Because they are only worried about themselves. But if they explain to you WHY they want to learn from you… then you’ll teach them.”

Barley blinked at that.

“Right?”

“…yes!” the old man declared. “Yes! It isn’t for shits and giggles at all!” He laughed and after a moment Krillin began to chuckle as well. “You are very wise, young man… very wise… and because of that… I will teach you my secrets. Now then… flare out your Ki.”

Krillin frowned. “Flare out my ki?”

Barley’s smile fell. “You ain’t deaf, are ya? I’d say ya have hair in your ears but ya don’t have any on top of that bald head of yours! I have more hair than ya!” He lifted up his hat to reveal the few strands that he did have before plopping it back down. “So show me your Ki! Power up!”

“Right!” Krillin said with more determination and he tensed, tapping into his inner power. At once he felt his power level begin to rise up as strength flooded his muscles, allowing him to fight at a much-

“Stop!” Barley called out, causing Krillin to pause. “Hold onto that, right now!”

Krillin, used to Master Roshi, did as he was asked, focusing on maintaining his power at the level it was currently at. A ki aura was flaring off his skin, crackling and flickering like a bonfire. It always amazed him when he was able to call forth such power; all his life he had been called weak. Pathetic. And yet he was able to tap into power that few in the world could! He glanced down at his arm, seeing the aura and knowing it was a sign of his strength-

“Look at that wasteful use of energy!”

Krillin blinked and snapped out of the power up he’d entered. “What?”

“That aura of yours!” Barley complained. “Did ya see it?”

“Well… yea,” Krillin said. “It was pretty impressive, right?”

“Impressive?” Barley asked before letting out a cackle. “Its flashy! That’s what it is!”

Krillin frowned. “And that’s… bad?”

Barley shot him a dark look. “Ya ever here the phrase “All flash, no substance”?”

Bristling at that Krillin snapped. “There is plenty of substance! That is proof of my power!”

“Yeah, it is,” Barely said, causing the young man to once more pause, confused by his sudden change in attitude. Gone was his dismissive attitude and instead Barely was pensive. Considerate. Serious. “It is showy though. And wasteful.”

“Wasteful?”

Barley nodded. “That glow you have going? That’s your ki leaking out of your body. Released into the air. That’s why you have to focus in order to power up… and have to be careful when doing it. No different than performing a KI blast.”

“Well… yeah,” Krillin said, not getting Barley’s point. “I mean, that’s what happens when you tap into your ki-“

Barely, without even flexing a muscle, suddenly began to glow.

It was barely there. Just a light illumination coming from under his skin. It was like someone holding a flashlight up to someone’s ear. It was nothing like Krillin’s power up, or Goku, or Piccolo. Tien or Chiaotzu or Roshi either. He’d… he’d honestly never seen someone power up like that. But what was more startling was just how POWERFUL Barley had suddenly become. No where near Goku of course, or even Krillin himself… but Krillin could sense that his energy levels had rocketed up.

“Do you know what wins fights?” Barley asked. “Endurance. A flashy move might be nice but 9 times out of 10 people win fights by outlasting their opponents. Letting them tire themselves out so you can then end the battle with a single blow as they stand there barely able to remain up and running.” He smirked at Krillin, gesturing at his own body. “I will never be the strongest fighter. I know that. Seeing that orange wearing guy with the bed head and the green fellow? I know I’ll never match them. Heck, I can tell you are more powerful than me. But… I will outlast you. Let you drain your strength away performing silly moves, flaring your aura, and the entire time letting your strength just leech away… and then I will win.”

And suddenly Barley was darting around him, throwing out punches and kicks that Krillin moved to deflect and counter. And while he managed to avoid getting hit by the time Barley ended Krillin could feel his heart pounding… and the old man was standing there, yawning.

“That is what I will teach you. I will show you how to make every drop of KI matter. You will attack with punches that use only the bare minimum you need. Your strikes will be small… but devastating. You will be able to destroy 40 showy fools who waste their time and energy just to try and impress others. Not because you want to be strong! Not because you think you have to prove yourself! Because you know you need every ounce of strength so you can protect your friends! Your family! Your world!” He pointed a spindly finger at Krillin. “Are you ready to learn?”

Krillin nodded his head, tightening his gi. “I am!”

“Then… let’s show you the secrets of Selfless Style!”

~MC~MC~MC~

“Bulma?” I called out as I walked back down into her lab. “Feeling any better?”

“Oh, so much!” Bulma said as she came out of a room, brushing her hair. She’d changed into a nicer outfit, had done her makeup, and most importantly looked like she’d actually gotten some sleep. “Hey, lunch!” She paused, considering the plate I had brought down full of… well, frankly it was all Japanese food so I had no fucking idea what any of it was and was just glad that the robots in the kitchen could make pizza and burgers. “Or is it supper?”

“Technically for you it’s brunch considering you just got up,” I stated, “but it’s a late lunch for everyone else.”

“Oooooh,” Bulma bemoaned, “I shouldn’t have done that… so much time wasted-“

“Noooooo,” I said slowly, drawing out the word, “you shouldn’t have tried to go multiple days without sleep. You need sleep to keep you sane.”

“Oh?” Bulma asked. “What is that supposed to mean?”

Thankfully it was Isco who answered. “It means that when you humans don’t power down properly you tend to get manic ideas. And as someone who relies upon you to make sure I operate at peak efficiency I don’t like the idea of going into Safe Mode only to awaken with half my shell now made of water and coconuts.”

“You wouldn’t mind spider legs though,” I commented.

“Well, naturally,” Isco replied.

Bulma stared as down and I prepared myself for her to begin screaming and ranting about how we had no idea what we were talking about… only for Bulma to let out a disheartened sigh. “Yeah… yeah, you’re right.” She dropped her gaze, staring at her hands. “I just feel so… useless!” Bulma began to pace the floor, Isco and I following after her so it became less pacing and more her leading a small parade. “I just keep trying to think of ways to help everyone train and… I can’t figure out what to do! Krillin is gone so I can’t help him out until he gets back. Piccolo says that he is fine and honestly I don’t want to press him on any of that. Chichi has a thousand notes for Gohan with half of them being “I don’t want my baby to be training for anything!”. And Goku…” She let out a groan. “Do you realize how hard it is to help Goku train when he can’t even decide himself what he wants?”

“Considering when we asked him last week what he wanted on his burger and he just began rattling off ingredients?” I said.

“Its worse than that!” Bulma bemoaned, throwing her hands up in the air. “At least then I’d have something to work with! But all Goku says is “Oh, I don’t know! Anything would be great!” Then does that stupid laugh of his. “heheheh!” You know the one?”

Isco chimed in. “Where he shuts his eyes and rubs the back of his head?”

“Yes!” Bulma exclaimed, pointing at him. “That’s it exactly! Ooooh, I am growing to hate that laugh!”

“Bulma,” I said gently, “calm down.”

“Don’t you tell me to calm down!” she thundered, spinning around and jabbing a finger under my nose. “I am going to be as uncalm as I want, thank you very much!”

“Fair enough,” I said quickly, holding up my hands in surrender.

“I’m just so tired of trying to figure out a way to help him! Any of them! Even when I come up with a good idea they crap all over it. I suggested coming up with a better weight lifting system and Master Roshi just laughed because it was ‘easier to have them all lift trees!’. Just… gaaaah!” She let out a frustrated cry and kicked at a garbage can, causing it to topple over and send wadded up pieces of paper flying everywhere. Of course within moments little cleaning droids began to run about, gathering the paper and putting it right back in the bin.

“Making the children work…” Isco muttered in disgust, staring at the droids. “The nerve of…oh, wait… no, they are just little droids. That’s fine, they deserve to suffer then.”

I decided not to poke that bear and instead focused on Bulma. “Can I be honest?”

“Sure,” Bulma stated, having moved to a chair and slumped down on it in defeat, her rage leaving her and depression returning.

“You are thinking of this all backwards.”

“Oh?” she asked, though she barely mustered the energy to do that.

“Yeah.” I paused. “How would you defeat Goku?”

“What?” Bulma asked, confused.

“How would you defeat Goku?”

“Like… I don’t-“

“If you right now had to take him down, ensure he couldn’t fight… what would you do?”

“I don’t know.”

I shot her a cold look. “Don’t lie to me.”

“I’m not!” Bulma protested. “I have no idea how I’d defeat him! I don’t think about fighting my friends.”

“Yes you do,” I replied. “You think about it. Just like Goku has. And Tien. And Krillin. Everyone does it. Nothing wrong with it, completely natural. It is something everyone considers at some point: how would you take out a friend. Goku has done it for all of us, mark my words. Thought about how he’d get into Capsule Corp. What to do if Tien went berserk. Even how to defeat Master Roshi. Its nothing evil its just… that’s how fighters think.”

“Like you and your poison idea?” Bulma asked.

“I am NEVER going to live that down, am I?” I grumbled, both Bulma and Isco shaking their heads (or rather Isco just wiggled his entire form from side to side). “My point is that there is nothing wrong thinking about how you might fight someone. Daydream about it. Think of all the ways you could take someone down. So I ask you again, Bulma: How would you defeat Goku?”

Bulma considered my question very carefully. “…so going at him with straight kicks and punches aren’t going to work. Not only because Goku is super strong but he’s also super tough. So even getting something to augment my strength wouldn’t help that much. He’s fast too but I could counter that if I were able to plan ahead and figure out where to have the fight… lead him into someplace that wouldn’t be easily for him to escape from. He couldn’t see it coming though because if he had time to study it he’d probably just blast his way out.”

Bulma got up and began to walk about, this time Isco and I remaining put as she worked over the problem carefully in her head.

“So its not brute force. And you can’t hold him in a trap for long. Give him even a minute or two and he can figure out how to get out of a nasty situation. That’s why I ruled things out like poison gas. Goku would realize what was going on. Gravity crushing him down is the same thing… he’d figure out how to either break the machine or fight in high gravity-“

“Speak of we should discuss that idea later,” I said, not wanting to derail her thoughts but… if she could build a Gravity Chamber early the group could race ahead by leaps and bounds.

“Electricity is what I’ve been thinking of. Something to shock him, fry his nerves. Hard and quick so he can’t think. You’d have to pile it on… couldn’t make it prolonged though. So a quick hard burst. And I’d need a way to get out of his path…” She rubbed her chin before suddenly looking up at me. “Okay, I get what you are going for. Raditz is Goku’s brother so reasonably whatever works on Goku would work on Raditz. There is just one problem: the only person that might be willing to use any of these ideas is you and you’re all in with magic.”

“Not all in,” I stated. “I’m willing to have a few science tricks up my sleeve.”

“Still, you said yourself you aren’t a fighter.”

“Yeah, that’s true,” I admitted. “And it wasn’t me I was thinking of.”

“Then who?”

I just stared at her.

“What?”

“Bulma… you ever think about Power Armor?”

Chapter Text

One Month Later…

“Hey Chichi!” Goku called out, running over to where Chichi and I were busy looking over the medical supplies. She had really gotten into making sure we were well stocked up; at first it had been for Gohan’s sake but after a few weeks she’d realized that everyone BUT Gohan was more likely to get injured on this island. And she had taken to heart the idea that the Sensu beans should be saved for only the most drastic of situations. Thankfully the worst we’d had was Tien breaking his ankle after a bad kick so we were only down one bean. I’d gotten a few cuts and scrapes myself but not enough for me to waste a bean on.

‘Honestly it’s a good thing the two of us are here,’ I thought to myself as she went through a roll of bandages. ‘Even Tien doesn’t know how to wrap a wound properly.’ Chichi had studied up on all of this, making sure that she knew just how to take care of any injury that might come up mostly to ensure that her son and husband (in that order) were okay and able to heal up. Me? I hadn’t wanted to take gym class in high school and thus me and my friends had done a sports medicine class instead. It had paid off when I’d been summoned to deal with a sprain Roshi had gotten just the other day and stopped Chiaotzu from wrapping his entire head in gauze after he got a nasty bump from a failed dodge.

That was the thing the anime and manga never truly showed you: the damage done to become a skilled fighter. Oh, they played it up for laughs, like Gohan being bruised and bump-riddled after training with Piccolo… but even the Namekian warrior had managed to injure himself in his pursuit of growing stronger. And it was now Chichi and my job to try and help minimize the lasting effects.

We were just finishing the inventory when Goku came over, waving his hand rapidly. I nodded to Chichi, who smiled and left me with her data pad to finish the final counts while she walked over to Goku. But he only took her just out of my eyeline… not enough for me not to be able to hear them speak.

“What is it, Goku?”

“Oh, I was just thinking about something Bulma said and I wanted to get your opinion on it.”

“And what is that?”

“Well, Bulma claimed that when you work out, while it makes your muscles bigger your body has to compensate so your boobs get saggy.”

“WHAT?!?” Chichi roared.

“Whoa, calm down!” Goku exclaimed. “I was just wondering! Bulma is really smart so I figured she must know but I also know you used to train…”

“Yes Goku and I assure you my boobs aren’t saggy!”

“Well… I guess.” He didn’t sound convinced and I could tell that Chichi heard the tone as well. She must have glared at him because Goku hastily added. “Its just… well, maybe if you let me have a look at them then I could tell you? Might be hard for you to check.”

“Is that so?” Chichi said.

“Uh huh!”

“Chichi!” I called out. “Knee him in the balls!”

“WHAT!?!” Goku screamed in shock and horror. “Why… why would you want to do that?”

“Because you deserve it!”

“I do-AAAAAAAAAAAA!”

I walked around the corner to see Chichi standing over Goku, who was cupping his crotch. “Give it a moment…” There was a poof and where Goku had been there was now Oolong, cupping himself and moaning. “And there it is.”

“How did you know he was a fake?” Chichi asked.

“It was pretty obvious… did you NOT?!” Chichi just blinked. “Well, I suppose if Goku had said something that stupid he would have deserved a knee to the dragon balls.”

“Why would I knee the Dragon Balls?” the real Goku said, coming into the hallway dressed just in a towel. “Have you ever felt how solid those things are? Man, that would hurt!” He looked down at a moaning Oolong. “Oh hey, what are ya doing down on the ground there?”

I smirked. “He’s just reevaluating his life.” I knelt down and poked the Pig Man with my index finger. “And what did we learn today?”

“Ooooowwww,” Oolong whimpered.

“That’s right. Don’t be a filthy pervert.” I stood back up and shook my head. “Seriously, he’s lucky that you aren’t prone to anger, Goku or you’d have done a lot worse.”

“Why?” Goku said, confused. “What did he do?”

“Just was bothering me Goku in your form. That’s why I gave him a solid knee.”

“Well, that should have been your first clue!” Goku said with a laugh. “There is no way you’d be able to knee me like that, Chichi! My reflexes are-“

Chichi grabbed him and kneed him in the stomach.

“And what have WE learned?” I asked Goku as he doubled over, groaning. “The lesson, children, is to not insult Chichi. Who is a wonderful wife and mother, a good friend, and an amazing martial artist.”

“Thank you Kayos,” Chichi said with a bright smile… before making a jerking motion with her knee. I tensed but she didn’t actually hit me, instead just merely smirking before patting me on the shoulder. “Don’t forget it.”

“I won’t,” I said weakly, still sweating a bit, before handing her the data pad. “All set.”

“Wonderful. I’m going to go down to the gym and practice on some of the dummies Bulma set up, You boys have fun!”

“Yeah, it will be just great,” Oolong complained, shifting back and forth as he slowly recovered from the hit. “I’ll spend the next three hours-“

“Digging your meatballs out?” I asked with a smirk, having quickly recovered from Chichi’s little scare.

“And just what is going on here?” Baba declared, suddenly appearing at my side. I let out a yelp and the old witch let out a huff. “You need to work on your awareness!”

“I swear if you begin screaming ‘constant vigilance’…” I muttered before gesturing at the two. “The Perv Piggy… Piggy Perv? Whatever. He decided to try and trick Chichi into exposing herself.”

“Heheh!” Baba cackled. “Got what ya deserved! Just like that brother of mine… always thinking with that shriveled up worm of his!”

~MC~MC~MC~

“Whoa!” Gohan cried out, leaping out of the way as Master Roshi sent a blast of Ki energy rather close to his head.

“Watch it, old man!” Piccolo snapped before, without thinking, reaching down and helping Gohan up.

“Sorry ‘bout that,” Roshi said, rubbing his nose. “Just got the sense someone was mockin’ something real important…

~MC~MC~MC~

“And what about you?” Baba said, floating over to Goku.

“Oh, heheh, I just forgot how quick Chichi has gotten!” Goku sprang back to his feet, doing a few stretches before looking himself over careful. “Man, she sure does know how to hit! And so fast too! Its amazing how quickly she’s gotten back into fighting form with just so little time training!” He rubbed his belly. “I think she might even be stronger than when we fought in the tournament! If she had been like she is now back then the me back then could never have beaten the her of now and would have needed to train to become the me I am now to defeat the her back then who was as strong as the her she is now!”

We all stared at him.

“Did that make sense?”

“I’m sure somewhere in that word spaghetti there was an ounce of logic,” I commented.

“Oooo!” Gokus said, eyes, lighting up. “I could-“

“No!” Baba and I snapped at the same time.

“Aw, come on-“

“Its 9 in the morning, Goku!” I told him. “You can have spaghetti at lunch. Believe me, I’d be thrilled to have something different so I’ll even share with you-“ Which meant that I would have to make sure I got to serve myself first before Goku ate everything, “-but you need to focus on training. Maybe go work with Chichi? Prove that you respect her as a fighter?”

“I respect her as a fighter!” Goku complained. “I just know I’m faster than her!” He rubbed his stomach again, wincing. “Normally.”

“That’s because sometimes you are so fast ya don’t think!” Baba snapped, bopping Goku on the head as she floated around him, circling him like the moon around the planet. “You have no idea how to woo a woman!”

“Woo?” Goku asked, tilting his head in confusion.

I pinched the bridge of my nose. “Damn it all, Baba.”

“What was that?” the witch said sternly, glaring at me. “Why are you taking that tone with me?”

“Because now I have to give Goku The Talk because I sure as hell can’t let anyone else do it!”

Baba blinked, clearly considering what it would be like if Roshi or Piccolo tried to explain to Goku how one properly wined and dined a woman.

She began to cackle so hard she nearly fell of her crystal ball.

“Yeah yeah, laugh it the fuck up!” I snarled.

Goku, still confused, just stared at us. “Uh… so can I go train now?”

“Yes,” I grunted, running my tongue over my teeth. “But first I want you to apologize to Chichi and explain that you didn’t mean to insult her and you are sorry. And then, for the love of all that’s good and holy… don’t go spouting off anything stupid until I have a chance to explain things to you?”

“Good luck with that!” Baba declared.

Goku though merely nodded his head before hurrying off, leaving me, Baba, and Peepy the Wonder Pig.

“Well, unless you want to spend more time around this pathetic bit of bacon,” Baba said, “its time to continue your training. We need to still determine more about what magic you are best suited for if you want to complete the more complex spells.”

I nodded… but my gaze remained on Oolong.

“Well? Let’s go!” Baba declared.

But I shook my head. “I think I have a better idea on how I should be training today.”

That got Baba floating up to glare at me. “Now see here!” she snapped. “We talked about this… I set up the training regiment, not you! If I leave it up to you then you’d be only asking to shoot of fireballs or other flashy moves instead of learning actual proper skills!”

But even as she ranted I pulled out the Scroll of Knowledge and whispered my question, smirking as it began to write out the answer.

“Wipe that smile off your face, this isn’t a joking matter!” Baba said. “I am your teacher and-“

I held up the scroll.

Baba blinked.

“…well,” she finally said, “now that does have potential.”

And then she smiled.

~MC~MC~MC~

Ever since Kayos had mentioned power armor Bulma’s mind had been racing with ideas. For far too long she’d allowed Goku and Krillin and the rest of their friends to protect her but she didn’t want to be protected. She wanted to be able to fight on her own, without needing to worry about the others being around to help her. After all, there were plenty of times where they found themselves separated and it did no good if Bulma wasn’t able to defend herself.

The problem was figuring out how to balance everything she wanted.

‘Need power,’ she thought to herself. Not the first time such thoughts had entered her mind and she knew it also wouldn’t be the last that they would enter her mind either. ‘Power is the key against someone like Raditz. But… it isn’t the only key.’ She thought of what she had seen with Goku’s fights. ‘Power is one thing but you need to be able to move. Speed. And the ability to shift and adapt. Agility.’

It was the great puzzle that had tormented all inventors: how do you build something strong, light, flexible, and durable. Something that could do what you wanted but wasn’t so heavy and cumbersome that it made it not worth using. What good was a machine that could remove a rock from a field if it took ten times as long to get it to the spot than it would just hiring a team of men to drag it out with ropes? She had seen it in how Goku battled, dropping his weighted clothing so that he could have greater speed. She needed to protect herself and still be able to counter the quickness of the Saiyan foe that haunted them all.

Which was why she wasn’t thrilled that she’d been dragged away from her lab just as she felt she was nearing a breakthrough.

“You know, I hope you didn’t drag me out of my lab just to show off your muscles,” Bulma complained as Tien, shirtless and flexing, stood before her in the clearing. She had been in the middle of working on some new bio-weaves when Tien had asked her to come and help him with something and that had left her rather annoyed because she’d found herself getting into a good groove.

“Nope!” Chiaotzu declared, showing off his bicep.

Bulma couldn’t help but chuckle at that. “Very impressive.”

“You shouldn’t be dismissive of Chiaotzu,” Tien commented. “If he wanted he could punch a hole right through your stomach.”

She blinked at that and Chiaotzu smirked at her. A cold, calculating smile.

“…fair enough,” she said with a swallow, remembering that even at his small size Chiaotzu was a skilled warrior. ‘He did manage to get into the last World Martial Arts Tournament we all attended. And he held his own rather well there too. Its easily to forget that he’s a fighter because he looks so cute… but looks can be deceiving.’ She felt ashamed for dismissing Chiaotzu… after all, she had become mad herself that everyone thought she was just a dumb bimbo when in reality she was one of the smartest people on the planet.

“Besides,” Tien said dryly, “you aren’t my type.”

“Oh yeah,” Bulma said, eyes suddenly lighting up, “I’ve been meaning to ask you… what did ever happen to Launch?”

“We didn’t work out,” Tien admitted. “Just too different.” Bulma must have stared at him a bit too hard because he added rather quickly, “Its fine.”

“Really?”

“…okay, not really,” he admitted. “It hurt. But I also knew it was the right thing to do.”

“It was like leaving the Crane School,” Chiaotzu stated. “It was our home and we dedicate our lives to it… but going on would have hurt even more. It was better to make the break.”

Tien let out a sigh at that. “Yeah.”

Bulma didn’t press him further to ensure he was telling the truth. She knew what it was like to end something because while it was wonderful it was also terrible and the momentary sharp pain of breaking it was better than a death by a thousand tiny cuts.

Instead she said, “Can I ask…” Tien looked up at her and rather than ask just WHAT had gone wrong with the relationship Bulma found herself saying, “…where she is then?”

At that Tien smiled. A genuine smile. “She decided she wanted to see the world. Right after we broke up she went to some big card game tournament and won the entire pot.”

“Still wish you’d waited a few weeks to break up…” Chiaotzu bemoaned and Tien glowered at his best friend for the comment.

“She decided she wanted see what life had to offer. She’s been traveling all over, seeing the sights.”

“We get postcards!” Chiaotzu declared.

“Well, I’m glad she’s happy,” Bulma said. “So now you can explain that little comment about me not being your type!” She put her hands on her hips, flashing a dangerous smile at the two. “Don’t think I’d forgotten that comment!”

Tien winced but then stated, “Is Goku YOUR type?”

“…fine,” Bulma said. “As long as the reason you aren’t interested in me has to do with feeling like family rather than thinking I am ugly then I suppose I can allow that.” She shook her head before looking around the clearing. “So, what did you need from me?”

“Did you make the device we asked you to?” Tien asked.

“Right here!” Bulma said, pulling from her side bag a small tablet. “Took some work and I had to bug Roshi a few times but I was able to get it all set up. I give to you the Energy Scanner!” She flipped it around so that Tien could see the screen. She knew he most likely didn’t understand 90% of what he was seeing but that honestly didn’t matter. What did was that Bulma had been able to get the device made and not have it be twenty devices at once. “With this hand device I can get all sorts of readouts. Ki levels, estimated strength levels due to impact, air movement, and destruction comparisons. All of this combines together to tell me the Attack Power someone has as well as the defensive power!”

“And it can do all that?” Tien asked.

Bulma scowled. “Of course it can! I wouldn’t have said it could do it otherwise! Come on Tien, what do you take me for?”

“Okay, okay, calm down,” Tien pleaded.

“Don’t tell me to calm down! You insult my work and expect me to calm down? Maybe I should just take this and throw it into the ocean. Maybe the whales can determine Attack and Defense Power-“

“I’m sorry, okay?”

She took several moments to calm herself before finally nodding. “Alright then.” Seeing as he wasn’t going to argue with her anymore Bulma decided to continue on. “So I already scanned several of you while you were fighting and also asked my dad to send over some data so I could actually create a scale.” She didn’t mention that she’d convinced Kayos to let her ask the Scroll of Knowledge a few questions… no need to clue anyone in on any “shortcuts” she had taken. “So a standard human baby is our base level.” She hit a few buttons before showing on the screen the image of a cute chubby baby that couldn’t even sit up. “They are a 1 on the Bulma Scale.”

“The… Bulma Scale?” Tien asked.

“Of course!” Bulma said with a chipper voice. “I created this so it gets named after me! Newtons, get out of the way! Here come Bulmas!”

Tien and Chiaotzu just stared at her.

“…so then,” she continued on. “So you are have reached 697 on the Bulma Scale. Chiaotzu, you are around 539. Of course Raditz, from what I’ve looked over from his battle with Piccolo and Goku, is at 2943 on the Bulma Scale.”

“He’s that high!?!” Chiaotzu wailed.

“Well, he could be higher or lower,” Bulma admitted. “This works better scanning stuff live, rather than off film. But I think that’s where he’s roughly at.”

“Meaning we are no where close to being at his level,” Tien said bitterly.

“But that’s why we’re doing this, remember?” Chiaotzu said, coming over at patting his friend on the leg.

“Yeah, I know,” Tien muttered. “I just thought we would have closed the gap quicker.”

“Well considering that you were at 185 at the last World Martial Art’s Tournament I’d say you’ve done pretty good!” Bulma said. “And while I can’t get a decent reading thanks to limited footage I can tell that you have improved.”

Tien finally nodded, accepting. “Yeah. And if we keep training we’ll only get stronger.”

Not said was that Raditz would most likely be training as well.

“Well,” he said, “no use wasting any more time then. I want you to confirm that I am still at 697, okay?”

“Right o!” Bulma said happily backing up and aiming the Energy Scanner at him. “Right now you are at a basic 319 but I imagine that’s because you haven’t fully powered up.”

“Yeah,” Tien confirmed before tensing, channeling his Ki through his body. Bulma watched on the screen as the numbers began to climb higher and higher as the visible aura of energy began to flare around the man. The veins on his neck stuck out, his muscles bulged, and he growled low in his throat as he drew more and more of his power to the surface. Off to the side she heard Chiaotzu also powering up but didn’t stop scanning Tien.

He suddenly burst into motion, throwing a series of kicks and punches, lashing out at the air. The device took all of that in, calculating how fast he was moving, how the air was being displaced by his strikes, and how his body was reacting. All to give her a complete picture of his strength both in terms of attack and defense so she could then have an overall score.

“697… 701… 712. Okay, its holding at 712. Either you’ve gained 15 more on the Bulma Scale or its like I thought and using the footage doesn’t give me the full story. I can also tell more if you begin sparing with someone, give you a break down of your defensive prowess vs. your offensive.”

“Not right now,” Tien said, refusing to stop. “I’d rather you focus on this!” He jerked slightly… and Bulam’s eyes went wide.

729… 738… 752… 764… 773!

“How… how are you…”

“Did it go up?” Chiaotzu asked excitedly.

“By over 60 on the Bulma Scale!” she declared and Tien smirked before moving to stand still. “I don’t understand… how did you do that? Were you repressing your real strength?”

“No,” Tien said. “It wasn’t my strength at all. It was mine and Chiaotzu’s.”

Bulma just stared at him, not quite getting what Tien was trying to tell her.

“A few weeks back I used the Scroll of Knowledge,” he said. Bulma wasn’t surprised; Tien had been saying for a while that he wanted to use it though she didn’t get why he had been so secretive about it.

‘Probably like Goku, thinking it’s a shortcut,’ she thought. Goku had been resisting using the Scroll, claiming that everyone else should get a turn first. Bulma though knew that her brother had gotten it into his head that using the scroll was cheating and he wanted to be able to beat Raditz on his own. EVERYONE thought he was being stupid, including Chichi and Piccolo, and they’d all taken their turn trying to wear Goku down and get him to just use the scroll!

It was actually rather interesting to watch, in Bulma’s opinion. Chichi used guilt, pointing out that if he wasn’t strong enough then Raditz would kill them all. Piccolo was utterly dismissive, insulting Goku’s dedication to training if he wasn’t willing to use everything on hand to become better. Roshi went old school, commenting that the Scroll was just another teacher (and Kayos had muttered they should have made it able to talk and dressed it in a little shirt and shorts, then Goku would have listened to it). Tien though had been quiet, clearly not liking he needed to use the Scroll but understanding why.

As for Isco…

~Earlier…~

“Hey, what are you doing, buddy?” Goku asked as Isco buzzed around him. “Come on! That tickles!” he laughed as Isco scanned him.

“Sorry Mr. Son,” Isco stated dryly, “I am setting up auctions on the Space Ebay to sell your clothing when Raditz returns and murders you because you are a stubborn fool and the listings always do better if one actually describes the fit of the clothing.”

Goku just stared at Isco as the droid hummed to itself, moving to measure Roshi.

~MC~MC~MC~

“So you used the Scroll to get stronger?” Bulma said, pulling herself from her thoughts and focusing on the task at hand.

“Not quite,” Tien said. “When we asked the Scroll how we could grow stronger it took us… literally.”

“Yeah!” Chiaotzu stated. “It said how WE could get stronger.”

“Tactics, skills, and power ups that focus on two people,” Tien continued.

“OH!” Bulma said. “It thought you wanted to work together.”

“Yes… and it was right. Because what it suggested… we are learning how to do things together we couldn’t do on our own.” He gestured at himself and Chiaotzu. “What you saw there was Energy Sharing.”

“Energy Sharing?” Bulma asked.

Tien nodded. “It’s a technique that allows you to pass your energy to someone else, to help strengthen them up if they are running low. But what we’ve discovered is when you do that sometimes the power actually increases. I might only give Chiaotzu a tiny bit… but it grows in the transfer.”

“That… shouldn’t happen,” Bulma said. “The law of Energy Transfer states that passing energy from one source to another always causes you to lose some.”

Chiaotzu shrugged. “We think it might gather energy around us… we’re not sure. The point is that by strengthening our bond we can pass energy back and forth and quickly increase it. Each pass making it grow.”

“Like using magnets to increase acceleration…” Bulma murmured to herself. “Hmmm… that could work. Definitely would be really handy. One could fight and the other focus on passing energy back and forth.”

“That’s not all,” Tien said before looking at Chiaotzu. “Ready?”

The smaller fighter tensed. “Yeah… okay.”

The two began to glow and Bulma stepped back once more, watching as they stood there. At first she didn’t see anything happening and thought maybe they were just passing energy between the two of them. But then she began to see it…

On Tien’s cheeks red circles slowly appeared, faint at first but growing in color, deepening the red. His skin also become a touch lighter; he wasn’t overly tan like Yamcha but he wasn’t as pale as Krillin sometimes got so seeing him go pasty white was startling.

Bulma looked toward Chiaotzu… and cried out when a crack formed on his forehead, it splitting open to reveal a third eye.

“Wha… how?!?” Bulma declared as she fell on her rear, scrambling back in shock.

“Its called Bond Fusion,” Tien stated. “It’s a secret skill Uskeneer Warriors have perfected. When two fighters are in perfect sync they can share their skills and traits with one another.” Tien focused and Bulma watched as a rock near her began to rise up. It was wobbly and only got up a foot before it dropped back down but it still rose in the air. “I’m still working on it,” he admitted.

“That’s… that’s amazing!” Bulma exclaimed. “You were able to use Chiaotzu’s telekinesis!”

“And I am learning how to use Tien’s Witches’ Style!” Chiaotzu said before grunting… and two little hands popped out of his back. Just hands. It wasn’t as impressive at Tien’s full arms when he used the move but it was far better than anyone else.

“We also think that Chiaotzu, because he has a purer heart than me, may be able to tap into the power of the Triclops race that I have been unable to even touch.” Chiaotzu hurried over and patted Tien on the leg in comfort; Bulma knew that it bugged Tien greatly that he couldn’t use all the powers of his race because of his training with Master Shien leaving such a mark on him. “Thanks,” he said to his friend and the two powered down, returning to normal. “Working together we can both master new moves and skills and then pass them to the other. We have some other ideas…”

“But that is wonderful!” Bulma exclaimed. “So many different ways you can use that in battle! I am so proud of you!” She blushed after she realized what she had said. “Not that you are trying to prove anything to me! I just mean-“

“We know, Bulma, and thank you,” Tien said. “Now… ready to watch us startle Goku and Piccolo with all this?”

Bulma nodded her head rapidly. “Yeah… though lets have Isco record it all!”

“Like I recorded you?” the droid said, suddenly floating down.

“…give me that footage,” Bulma said dangerously.

But Isco, of everyone on the island, wasn’t frightened by Bulma or Chichi for that matter. So instead he merely rose up out of her grasp. “No, I believe not. I need as much blackmail material as I can get on your squish and squirms.”

“ISCO!” Bulma roared, chasing after the droid.

~MC~MC~MC~

It was rare for me to hear Baba being encouraging. Her thing was grumping and complaining and thinking everyone was weaker than they were only to be mildly surprised when they proved not to be. She’d thought that waves would knock over Piccolo and that Goku would blast his arms off trying out new variations of the Kamahamaha. And with me it was that I was a weakling that wouldn’t ever matter. Which didn’t bug me because she was kind of right on that, at least in turns of fighting.

So it was a very odd thing to hear her compliment me as I finished up with our newly created training regiment.

“You have a natural affinity for that,” she commented, clearly impressed.

“I have some acting training,” I stated. “Did Shakespeare.”

“So did I but that doesn’t… oh. Heheheh, the plays!” I merely raised an eyebrow at that, wondering if the Witches Three from Macbeth had taken inspiration from Baba. “But you are picking all that up far faster than I expected, esepecially with only a few hours of practice.”

I opened my mouth to tell her thanks only for her to cut me off.

“But don’t get cocky! The rest of your magic sucks and we need to get that strengthened! Now, I want you to work on building up your reserves.”

“Okay,” I said with a shrug.

“Evil Magic.”

That made me less inclined to begin.

“And wipe that scowl off your face!” Baba demanded. “Its important we get your Evil Magic up to the level of your Good Magic so we can determine just which you are better suited for.”

“Good,” I said. “I’m better suited for Good.”

“Heh, you say that now!” She wagged her finger at me. “But let’s see what you say when you have a taste of true evil.”

I let out a groan at that but didn’t argue.

Building up Evil Magic and Good Magic was different from building up good Ki and Bad Ki. With those the Ki was affected by the actions of the user, turning Neutral Ki into one or the other. It was like adding drops of food coloring to frosting. You added some blue or some red and it began to become the color. The more you committed the more it changed. To the point that it became very hard to undo that color. King Piccolo, according to Baba, could have dedicated the rest of his existence to saving the galaxy and probably never managed to get his Ki to any level of Good. Our Piccolo thankfully had started out with Neutral Ki, not tainted by his previous self’s actions, and thus even with the evil things he’d done had a chance to develop his Ki into Good Ki.

But Magic? Magic was different. With it one’s actions actually CREATED the Magic without the body. That was like having already dyed frosting and making a cake with it: apply some red, apply some blue. One might overwhelm the other but you could still have both and USE both. Ki could become one or the other… Magic remained what it was, waiting to be used.

As a human I had a good mix of both but Baba had made clear that my Good Magic far outweighed my Evil Magic. She wanted to build up the Evil a bit more, get it to levels where I could cast some spells with it, and then see what I had a natural affinity for. Only then would we be able to figure out the best training regiment for me.

I knew the basics now… it was time to get advanced.

“Fine,” I muttered, pulling out my phone.

“So, what evil are you going to do?” Baba asked. “Call in a bomb threat? That would be a fun one! Very evil!”

“I’m investing in the American Stock Market.”

Baba blinked.

“…eh?”

“Only companies that I see as evil,” I said. “Polluters, drug manufacturers who refuse to price their pills at a reasonable rate, Ford…”

“That is your idea of evil!?” Baba raged.

I shot her a cold look. “I’m from Michigan. Do you REALIZE what the fucking Ford Family did to the Detroit Lions?”

The Witch glowered. “I hardly thing-“

I held out my left hand and dark Evil Magic appeared.

“Oh.”

“Yeah, I told you, they are truly-“

“Not that you simpleton!” Baba snapped, hovering over to my hand, stared at the newly gained magic. “That… that isn’t right.”

I glanced at her, suddenly growing concerned as I pocketed my phone. “What do you mean?”

“Your Evil Magic… it isn’t behaving like its supposed to. At least not any Evil Magic I’ve ever seen.”

I looked down at my hand. Now that she said it the energy I was producing was… odd. I’d expected dark flames or an aura of wicked intent. Or perhaps the reverse, where it was icy cold to the touch. Lightning that crackled from my fingertips like the Emperor’s blue bolts.

But instead my magic… was a symobiote.

Not an actual one but very much like one. Black in color the magic didn’t flare out but instead it oozed about my palm and ran along my fingers. It never dripped or fell away, clinging instead tightly to my hand. Wiggling my fingers caused it to stretch but it was very quick to snap back to what it had been. It clung to me, held on tight like an upset child hugging their mother’s leg.

Baba reached into the folds of her robe and pulled out a pair of old fashion scissors. “Let me have a sample.”

“I feel I have to ask if you want a sample of my magic or my fingers,” I said.

“I don’t need your fingers I know where they’ve been!” she snapped. She reached out and grabbed at the tendril of Evil Magic, pulling it away from my skin. It was an… odd sensation, to say the least. A mix of a latex glove and Nickelodeon gak. It pulled away in a stretchy, rubbery sort of way, elastic springy. Baba brought the scissors up-

At once the magic lashed out, thrashing out at her and sending her flying before grabbing onto my hand. I got even more the clinging sensation of a child clutching to their parent even as I stared at Baba in surprise.

“I swear I didn’t do that!” I told her, not wanting the witch to get upset and begin attacking me.

But rather than get angry Baba got up, rubbing her head, and let out a delighted cackle. “Oh, now that packed a wallop.”

“…I sense a trap,” I said warily.

“Normally I’d applauded you for being cautious, so much better than those meat heads my brother likes to teach, but now I need you to focus and stop worrying!” She got back up on her crystal ball, little feet kicking wildly as she struggled to get upon it. As she did so I let the focus on my Evil Magic disappear, leaving me with just my own hands and nothing else. “Ah… there way go,” Baba said before looking at me. “Show me your Good Magic.”

She had seen it several times already but I knew she was leading to something so I flexed my hand… and watched as white magical energy burst out, flaring and flowing about my arm violently, roiling like a boiling pot.

“That’s… new,” I said dumbly. Beforehand my Good Magic had been very similar to the aura that Goku’s Ki gave off, only much smaller and more contained. But now it was racing along my arms like tidal waves, thrashing violently and without purpose.

“Haha!” Baba exclaimed, clapping her hands. “Yes! Yes!”

“You know what is going on?”

“Not at all!” Baba declared and my Good Magic disappeared as I stared at her in shock. “Your Good and Evil Magic aren’t behaving at all like they should!” She cackled before zooming over to grab my hands, looking them over. “Good Magic tends to remain close to the body, flickering like a flame that warms. Yours is a tsunami, barely contained destruction. Evil magic likes to spread out like a fog, infecting… your’s clings to you and is protective. Its like they swapped styles!” She smiled a gappy grin. “Oh, you are going to be so interesting!”

“…thanks,” I said, feeling very much like a bug under a microscope.

“This could affect entirely what kind of mage you end up becoming,” she said, not caring about my discomfort. “Or… what color you might end up being…”

“Color?” I asked.

“Of course! Magic users are classified by what type of spells they use and how they use them with their magic. The former gives the title, the latter the color.” She puffed up a bit. “I, for one, am an Ebony Fortune Witch. Ebonies are about finding out how to use magic that normally can’t be used for a spell to work: Evil Magic for One Day Revival Spells, for example. Sapphire is all about control and domination, be it of themselves or of others. Ivory are purists… don’t be an Ivory, they are boring and only want to follow the rules. Scarlets focus on the study of their magic to grow it in others; they don’t ever cast a spell on themselves, instead wanting to power up everything else around them while they are ‘pure’. Orange are all about the impossible and limit breaking… there is a reason why the Dragon Balls are orange, after all. Golds are similar to Scarlets but internal, the improvement of one’s self, seeking to increase their own powers through rituals and spells and potions. Emeralds focus on life and nature, treating their own magic like a garden that must be cultivated while Violets tend to be far more destructive. A violet, if they are having problems with their magic, will seek to hack that part of their magical self away and start again, or push themselves to destruction if it means glory and achievement. Pinks are mimics who learn fast and copy from others while Browns are thieves of the worst kind… even those that claim they are doing it for the good of others are little more than magic-stealing mongrels who try and justify their acts.”

“What of… Silver?”

At once Baba frowned. “Silver is a myth.”

“But what is it?” I asked. “What do the myths say?”

“Who cares?” she snapped, suddenly rather angry despite having been in a good mood only moments earlier. “It’s a myth! It isn’t real. We don’t have time-“

“The Scroll said I could become the Silver Sorcerer.”

Baba froze.

“So I’d like to know what that means,” I said.

“Silver… Silver can’t happen. Its impossible.”

I pressed on. “What is a Silver Sorcerer?”

The witch glowered for several moments. “Silver… which don’t exist and you must have read the Scroll of Knowledge wrong… are able to merge Good and Evil magic together. With all the others they focus on one type of magic… you can have good Orange Mages and evil Orange Witches. Boring heroic Ivory Spellcasters and evil Ivory Demon Lords. But Silver… silver is able to take their Good and Evil magic and blend them together, make them work as one… and thus reach levels no other magic user has ever reached.”

She stared at me.

“But it’s a myth. An impossibility. Good and Evil can’t work together. It would be…” she waved her hand about. “It doesn’t matter. Let’s get back to work. No more distracting me from making sure you aren’t a complete embarrassment.”

Even as I returned to buying stocks to increase my Evil Magic levels my mind went to what Baba had said… and left unsaid.

‘Good and Evil can’t work together. It would be… Chaos.’

Chapter Text

Thee and a Half Months Later…

The planet Venus was a harsh place.

The surface was a twisted area, with rocks that raced high into the sky only to suddenly curve downward and split into many different points and arches that raced back towards the ground below, like a tall candle that had been placed in the sun and allowed to droop and melt. What flat land there was cracked, with fissures letting loose blasts of acidic steam that could melt metal within moments of contact. The skies were also an acidic yellow and the air tasted of sulfur.

The creatures that made the surface their own had learned how to survive such dangers. They developed thick hides and shells that protected their bodies and were able to easily skitter and dart up sheer rock faces so that they might avoid the sudden geysers of acid and the shifting landscape that came with great quakes made the entire planet feel like it was going to crumble.

All of them stayed on the surface… for they knew that below ground far worse things liked to trek.

Deep in the bowels of Venus there were the spider snakes. Or, at least, that is what they would have been called had any who had ever encountered them lived to tell of their existence. Over 40 feet long their heads were like that of king cobras but rather than a snout like a snake there was just a large mouth dripping with venom. Just below the crown of the beasts were a series of blade-like limbs, able to easily dig through the hard stone of Venus’ underground so they might move about with ease, stalking their prey. They were, in a word, the apex predator of the planet.

Or… they had been.

Until Raditz had encountered them.

“Pathetic!” Raditz declared as he took on a rather large and scarred spider snake. It was a pale blue color, nearly white but just a hint of pigment, and had numerous old wounds along its scales. Two of its teeth were broken but that had never stopped it before from capturing its prey. Even now, with parts of it blown away by Raditz’ newly created Friday Cleaver, the old beast battled on, slamming its body against the tunnel as it tried to catch up with the Saiyan warrior.

But Raditz merely continued to fly in front of the beast, easily dodging its lunges and its swift strikes, arms folded over his chest.

“If you are the strongest thing this planet has then no wonder it is so scarcely populated! I would be ashamed to call this rock my home too if YOU were the mightiest of the mighty!”

The spider snake didn’t understand what the creature was saying. All it knew was that it was hungry and wanted a snack. So it suddenly reared up and fired from its mouth a blast of white webbing that caught onto Raditz’s chest, allowing it to stop and begin reeling him in towards its mouth. The Saiyan struggled for a moment, testing the strength of the webbing, but wasn’t able to break it apart simply by flexing. So he merely narrowed his eyes as he was drawn into the creature’s mouth, its circular maw of teeth like a tunnel of death.

With one final slurp the spider snake sucked Raditz in, clamping its jaw shut and giving a swallow, satisfied that its prey had finally been caught. It had been a longer fight than it was used to but now that the pesky little morsel was in its jaws it would-

The spider snake had just a moment to blink before two ki energy blades should out from its lower lip and through the back of its head, hovering there for just a moment before they whirled about, slicing off clean the creature’s head and sending it toppling to the cave floor below. Standing in the maw, surrounded by broken teeth, Raditz let out a huff before he yanked off a few bits of webbing that clung stubbornly to his arm.

“Pathetic,” he muttered to himself before floating out of the corpse, letting it fall to the ground with a thump. Rolling his shoulders he flew over to the tail and grabbed hold of it, dragging the entire creature back up to the surface. “You better at least taste good,” he grumbled, annoyed that he hadn’t gotten much a fight out of the beast as he would have wanted.

He knew he was getting stronger. When he had first landed on the planet the creatures on the surface had posed a decent enough challenge. But now he had to dive deeper and deeper into the planet core, seeking out the larger and more grotesque of the planet’s inhabitants in order to even work up a sweat. And soon he knew even that would be gone, leaving him only training regiments to get by. He should have been excited about that. It was proof that he was rapidly increasing his power level. He hadn’t scanned himself recently but he was willing to bet he was nearing double in power level!

‘And Nappa would still being a thousand over me in terms of power,’ he thought bitterly as he reached the fissure that led to the surface. He rocketed up, the spider snake bashing off the walls but the Saiyan didn’t care, too lost in his thoughts. ‘I need to get stronger… and quicker. Vegeta is so beyond me right now that even if I were able to take out Nappa he’d only see that as me becoming his new second in command… but I have no need for that. Not anymore. Now I want him to suffer… to be at MY beck and call. And the only way to do that is to drive his smug face into the dirt until he has no choice but to surrender or die!’

He burst back up to the surface and threw the spider snake’s body to the ground, several of the hairy winged creatures that lived in the rocky outcroppings taking flight after the startling noise. Raditz went over to his pod and took out a large carving knife and a butcher’s blade, running them along each other before setting to work hacking into the spider snake in hopes of getting some good soft meat.

‘The only way for me to match him will be the element of surprise. If my brother and I am able to take him quickly, before he has a chance to realize what is going on, then I can pin him before he has a chance to power up. It’s risky but I doubt I’ll have much time to do anything else.’

The better solution would have been to train with his brother. Even as weak as he was a Saiyan would provide a far better fight than any other alien creature that Raditz might encounter in the solar system and that would allow him to increase his power level by leaps and bounds. His battle against Kakarot and the Namekian alone had seen him gain several hundred points to his power level! A year with his brother and they would be able to match the Prince... especially if Vegeta continued his arrogant and rather lazy ways. He had been refusing to fight more and more, letting Nappa do the true battles while he came in and stole the kills and the glory. As such Vegeta’s power level had slowed its growth; where once the Prince, thanks to his dedication to training, had one of the largest increases in Power Levels in the entire Frieza Force he now coasted by.

‘But that won’t last,’ Raditz thought to himself. ‘He knows that we’ll be facing Frieza soon and he’ll seek the train. Challenge himself against greater foes and push his body to the limit. And when he does his rapid level increase will return. I can’t let him begin doing that before I’ve forced him to submit to me or there will be no chance of actually defeating him!’

Thus… surprise. It was a coward’s way, he knew that, but it was also his only way to break the Prince. To get him to submit.

‘And when he does… finally will I be ready to face Frieza and make him pay for what he did to our entire race!’

~MC~MC~MC~

“Who said that we have nothing to fear but fear itself?”

Swing! Whoosh!

“Franklin Roosevelt!”

Swing! Whiiiis! Thunk!

“First man to land on the Moon?”

Thunk! Thwig! Swish!

“Neil Armstrong!”

“And what did he-“

“Hey guys!” Chiaotzu called out, flying over to where Gohan, Chichi, and Goku were training. “What are you doing?”

“Hey Chiaotzu! Hey Tien!” Goku waved at the two, Tien just a few feet behind Chiaotzu as the two landed. “We’re training!”

Tien frowned at that. “I… see that.”

It wasn’t any training he or Chiaotzu had ever seen before.

Chichi had two large shields, each one strapped to her forearms, that she lifted up to protect most of her body. Gohan, meanwhile, had the Power Pole and the Shield of Countless Defense… or, as Goku had rechristened it, The Dragon Shield. He kept alternating between the two of them, swinging the pole at his mother who would easily deflect his attacks, then raise up his shield as Goku threw small Ki blasts at his son. The shield would absorb the attacks and send the right back at Goku, forcing him to quickly move so he avoided the blowback.

“And what did he say when he landed?” Chichi called out.

Gohan swung the Power Pole. “This is one small step for man… uh… one… large leap for mankind?”

“Sorry, Gohan,” Chichi said. “one giant leap for mankind.”

“Awwww, but I was so close.”

“You know the rules, son!” Goku called out.

Gohan pouted but that didn’t last and he quickly swung his shield onto his back and slipped the power pole between himself as the shield before he dropped to the ground, doing a series of pushups.

“So what exactly is going on?” Chiaotzu asked.

Chichi smiled as Goku helped her take off one of the shields she was wearing; when he set it onto the ground it clanged so loudly that no one was going to doubt that it weighed a lot. Arm free she went over to a cooler with the Capsule Corps logo and got a bottle of water, taking a long drink from it. “We’re teaching Gohan how to focus on more than one thing during a battle. He has to keep hitting me with the Power Pole, dodge Goku’s hits, and answer study questions from last night.”

“Its great!” Goku chirped. “One of the hardest things to do in a battle is to figure out how to deal with an opponent while planning ahead for your next move. This way Gohan learns how to think faster on his feet and go with the flow of the battle.”

“And the push ups?” Tien asked.

“If he fails he has to do a few reps,” Chichi said. “He doesn’t like them but understands how important they are so it’s a good way to keep him active while also encouraging him to push to not make a mistake.” She suddenly stopped, looking right at her son. “Gohan, come here! I want you to rehydrate.”

Gohan, clearly thrilled to have a break, quickly scrambled to his feet and ran over to his mother, who handed him a water bottle. She had to gently remind him to slow down, lest her make himself sick guzzling the water so quickly, and began to look him over to make sure that he didn’t have any injuries.

“Chichi certainly has gotten into training, hasn’t she?” Tien commented as he watched the two. Ever since they had arrived on the island the Z Warriors had noticed a slow but steady change in the woman. Chichi had always been rather fierce and determined but from what few letters they had gotten from the Son family before their reunion it had seemed that she’d put all of that aside in the name of being a wife and mother. But surrounded by fighters, with even the likes of Kayos putting in the effort to train (even if he didn’t do what they did the man did do some strength training and cardio ever morning),Bulma herself beginning to ask questions about getting in a regiment, and of course Goku opening talking about how he excited he was for Chichi to back into fighting form and, well, Chichi had thrown herself in fully to training.

As a result the woman who was currently removing her other shield as she checked over Gohan was completely different from the woman he’d met when they’d gathered the Dragon Balls. She’d cut her hair a bit shorter and taken to wearing it in a small bun when she was fighting. She now wore a blue version of Goku’s own gi, having decided that her old fighting clothes didn’t allow her the freedom of movement she needed. Of course she’d also needed new clothing due to her physical changes; there was no hiding that she’d gained a couple inches in her arms and Tien was willing to bet the same was true of her legs. She wasn’t as built as himself or Goku but everyone could see that the woman was a fighter and honestly Tien was rather interested to see how she’d stack up against some of the opponents they’d faced in the last World Martial Arts Tournament.

“She sure has!” Goku said with a large grin. “I’m going to need to change our morning workout… its getting to easy for her!”

“Which you don’t mind in the slightest?” Tien said with a sly little smile.

“Of course not! Its great to having a training partner!”

“oh, I was thinking about… other things.”

That caused Goku to begin blushing. “Heheh, c-come on Tien! Its just about getting better and stronger…”

“I’m sure, Goku, I’m sure,” he said, not believing the orange wearing man in the slightest.

“I mean it!” Goku whined, utterly embarrassed. “I just-“

“Goku, could you come here?” Chichi called out. “I want to show Gohan that throw we talked about.”

“Oh, coming!”

Tien and Chiaotzu watched as Goku happily ran over to help Chichi, the two sharing a look.

Oh yes… Goku might have loved his wife before but now? He was utterly ENTHRALLED.

~MC~MC~MC~

Yamcha came to a skidding halt, staring in shock at what he was seeing.

“It… it can’t be,” he whispered. After months of running, of seeing nothing but the same cloud filled sky and slithering, slinking path that stretched from horizon to horizon… it stopped.

Snake Way… ended.

And there, waiting at the very end, was a small little orb. A planet, smaller than a shopping mall, with a little house and a small road that went around it and a tree and even a car.

Yamcha rubbed his eyes with his fists before looking around.

‘Nope… still there,’ he thought to himself as he stared at the planet. ‘I’ve lost my mind.’ He plopped down on the end of snake way, legs swinging back and forth. “Wonder where I’m actually sitting,” he murmured to himself. “Maybe I’m just sitting on the edge of Snake Way and if I turned right or left I’d keep going.” He swallowed. “Or maybe I fell and I’m dropping down into hell and this is all my brain trying to rationalize what is happening to me! Or maybe I’m actually in hell right now, stuck in some sort of loop of failure with that planet being the final step and if I leap towards it I suddenly find myself landing in front of that jerk who tried to kill Krillin and everything starts all over again! Or-“

“Or maybe you should come over here so I can actually train you!” a voice called out.

Yamcha broke out of his growing panic to stare at the planet, where he spotted a small, squat figure dressed in a black garment staring at him. The figure had blue skin with long thin antenna jutting out of his black… cap?... and wore a pair of very dark sunglasses over his eyes. He was as tall as he was wide and had a round puffy face with two ‘whiskers’ coming off either side of his mouth. Yamcha could only stare at the strange little man, who looked up at him with bemusement.

“Well? You came all this way, didn’t you? I doubt you came to look at my car… though I wouldn’t blame you because it truly is a beauty!” he walked over to said car and patted it’s hood. “Mint condition. And I make sure to wax it every few days so it really shines!”

“Are… are you King Kai?” Yamcha asked.

“What was that?” the blue man said, holding a hand up to his pointed ear. “I didn’t get that.”

Yamcha took a breath and called out in a loud clear voice, “Are you-“

“WATCH IT!” the blue man exclaimed, cupping his hands over his ears. “You’re gonna blow out an eardrum if you keep screaming like that!”

“Oh… uh… sorry?”

“You should be sorry,” the man said. “Now get on down here already!”

Yamcha slowly stood up, swinging his arms. “Well… no time like the present. It looks strange but maybe for the afterlife it is completely normal for great fighting masters to have little planets. I mean, Master Roshi has his island and that is pretty strange and this is the Afterlife so I suppose-“

“HURRY UP!”

“Right!” he exclaimed before bracing himself. He bent down-

“Hey, before you do that-“ the blue man said, Yamcha falling onto his butt he was so startled by the sudden comment, “-I should warn you that the distance is greater than you think… and my planet is pretty bouncy so you’ll want to be careful when you leap across. Give it your all and embrace the ground.”

“Right… embrace the ground,” Yamcha muttered before taking a few steps back. He took in a breath before racing forward, flinging himself with all his might towards the planet…

…and slamming into it face first.

“Hahahaha!” the blue man cackled, Yamcha slowly turning his head to see him slapping his knee. “I love it when people do that! Admittedly you are only the second person to arrive and the first person to fall for that but I love it all the same.”

Yamcha struggled to raise his head, spitting out a mouthful of grass. “Glad I could entertain,” he muttered. “So, you’re King Kai?”

“Yes, I am King Kai,” the blue man stated with a smile. “Greatest instructor of fighting in all of the North Area. And you must be the pizza guy.” His mouth twitched several times before he began laughing again. “Sorry about that, but I’ve always wanted to do that. Like I said, I don’t get many guests. Normally its just me and Bubbles and Gregory. And Bubbles just likes to monkey around… get it? Because he’s a monkey?”

“He is?” Yamcha asked.

“Uh, King Kai?” a squeaky voice said and Yamcha turned to see a large cricket standing there. Well, large for crickets, not large overall. “You haven’t introduced us yet which is kind of a problem because how is he supposed to know who we are if-.”

“Oh, right… sorry about that.” He gestured at the cricket. “This is Gregory. Don’t mind him, once he begins talking he doesn’t shut up. And that’s Bubbles. Say hello Bubbles.” He waved over to his house, where a monkey (who looked more like a chimp) stood, letting out a series of calls. “Now then, you have come to my planet to train with me, hmmm?”

“That’s… that’s right,” Yamchas said, finally managing to get to his feet.

“Heh, having some trouble there, aren’t you?” King Kai said smugly. “Not surprised. My planet is great to train on due to its gravity being far greater than Snake Way or Earth’s. The effort you have to put in will make you all the stronger.” He waved a finger back and forth. “But… I can’t have you just begin without proving yourself!”

“What do I need to do?” Yamcha said with determination. This is what he had been running for. Why he had refused to be returned. The chance to train with one of the greatest Martial Artists in the galaxy! It didn’t matter what King Kai requested, he would do it! Go beyond it too! He would-

“Make me laugh.”

“…what?” Yamcha asked, his thoughts derailed.

“Not that hard. You need to make me laugh.” King Kai smirked at that. “But I must warn you… I have heard every joke out there! It won’t be easy to surprise me and surprise is what makes jokes so great! So come on… give it your best shot!”

Yamcha’s mind went blank. Everything shut down. All except one terrible joke he’d heard one time and when he’d snickered at it Bulma had hit him over the head and said that it was terrible. There was no way-

“A baby seal walked into a club.”

-he’d tell it.

King Kai froze in place.

‘Oh I’m going to die again,’ he thought as the fighting master began to shake.

“He… he… he walked… into… a club?” King Kai stammered before he pressed his hands to his mouth and began to laugh. “He walked into a club! Because it could be a club like you get drinks from or a club for clubbing baby seals!” He held his hands tight to his face, like he was trying to force his laughter back into his body, but he eventually gave up, reduced to peals of laughter. “A club! Hahahahaha! A club!”

“Uh… right,” Yamcha said as King Kai slapped his knee. “So… does that mean you’ll train me?”

King Kai struggled to get a hold of himself but, finally, was able to get out, “Yes… yes I will train you!”

“Great!” Yamcha said, pumped. “With you, I know I will become an even stronger fighter!”

“Fighter?” King Kai asked, looking up at him. “I thought you came to become a better comedian.”

Yamcha’s shoulders dropped.

“N-no King Kai,” he said weakly, “I came to learn to be a greater fighter. To grow stronger. You… can do that, right?”

“Of course I can!” King Kai said dismissively, turning his back to Yamcha. “Anyone can be a fighter though… a comedian is where you truly have to work hard! You sure you don’t want to go that route?”

“There is a dangerous alien warrior who will be returning to earth… he nearly killed my friend Goku along with Piccolo. If I’m not stronger I won’t be able to help them defeat him.”

“Did you try telling him that joke about the baby seal?” King Kai began to snicker again. “Because… because that was a really good one!” When Yamcha didn’t say a word King Kai let out a sigh. “Well, I guess if you are determined to be a boring fighter instead of the greatest comedian ever I have no choice in the matter. Yes, I will train you to become stronger.”

Yamcha bowed, even if King Kai couldn’t see him doing so. “Thank you. I promise I won’t let you down.”

“Yeah yeah,” King Kai said. “Now then, your first test is to catch Bubbles.”

“…you’re kidding.”

King Kai suddenly spun around, hands on his hips. “I thought you said no more jokes! You want to be a better fighter then you go catch Bubbles!”

Yamcha swallowed. “O-okay, King Kai! I will!” He got into a runner’s stance. “How hard can it be?” He pushed off…

…and fell flat on his face when the gravity ripped him right back down into the ground.

“Heh, you sure about not becoming a comedian?”

~MC~MC~MC~

“So I have… like… 20 concerns,” I said as I looked at the gang. They, in turn, seemed a bit too eager to see me suffer a long and painful death.

“Aw, come on Kayos!” Goku said from where he sat. “This will be great for you both!”

“In terms of Piccolo getting to laugh as he watched my body twitch on the ground before I end up meeting King Yemma?” I asked nervously, watching as the green fighter cracked his neck. I tugged on my jeans and made sure my shirt was tucked in; unlike the others I liked wearing casual clothes even in a fight and as such the only thing that could be considered fancy were the hiking boots I’d put on.

Baba floated over to me and smacked me across the head. “You aren’t going to win with that attitude!”

“I’m not going to win at all!” I exclaimed. “He is one of the greatest fighters on Earth! He’s had years of training! And I’ve spent the last few months learning parlor tricks!”

“Even parlor tricks can take out mighty fighters,” Baba said, jabbing me with one of her bony fingers. “Now are you a man or a chicken?”

“…bwak,” I said dryly.

“Oh don’t be such a wimp,” Piccolo said firmly, rolling his shoulders. “I’m not going to be going all out. This is all about control for me.”

“Yes, as in ‘can I control not killing him’ and if you make a mistake it means I get to see Snake Way personally!”

“Now now, this will be good for both of ya!” Master Roshi proclaimed. “You need ta actually face some opponents and Piccolo needs to take on someone different from Goku and Tien. Now then the rules are simple: Piccolo, you need to knock Kayos down without hurting him and Kayos needs to find ways to attack you and get through your defenses.”

“Hmmpf, the latter is going to be impossible.”

“I vote with Piccolo on the impossible!” I called out, waving my hand in the air.

“Now then, on the count of three!”

“Gohan, buddy, tag in?” I asked weakly.

“Three… two…”

“Aw crap,” I muttered as I realized that there was no way out of this and I had no choice but to actually fight the reincarnation of the Demon King.

“…one!”

Piccolo fired off a ki blast.

I frowned as I saw that it looked… slow. Sluggish. Not like it was moving an inch per hour but not racing towards me in the blink of an eye. Like a softball lobbed underhanded by someone. I shifted by body out of the way and suddenly the world sped back up and the blast hit a tree.

“Heh!” Baba said with a laugh. “I knew you just needed a kick in the butt! Face a true opponent and your Mage Sight finally kicked in.”

“What’s Mage Sight?” Gohan asked.

“No different than Fighter Sense, just what we spellcasters use to slow down a fight and speed up our reactions. See how he twisted?”

“It was so quick!”

“It was,” I said only to yelp when Piccolo fired another blast at me, this one actually rocketing towards me and causing me to duck.

“I am recording your humiliation sir so you can focus on the fight and view it later!” Isco called out.

I set my jaw. ‘Right… as much as I might hate this it is better for me to face off against Piccolo rather than Raditz. At least he’ll hopefully pull his punches.’ Piccolo sent out another blast and once more the world slowed around me, allowing me to dodge it. ‘Don’t get cocky… he’s not putting much effort into this… if he were even using Mage Sight I’d be a pancake.’ I took a step back. ‘So I guess its time to show off what I’ve learned.’

I waited til I was in the right position, dodging a few more ki blasts before I saw one I liked. Just as it neared me I focused and dropped my shoulder.

To everyone else it looked like the Ki blast hit me, causing me to tumble and fall. I heard gasps of shock and Bulma cry out my name as I was hit. That was just the right distraction I needed.

“White Flag!” I shouted as I felt my magic grab hold of the ki blast and send it shooting down my arm and right back at Piccolo, forcing him to cross his arms to protect himself.

“What was that?!” Tien exclaimed, shocked.

“Did Kayos just use ki!?!” Goku said with wide eyes.

“It can’t be!” Roshi shouted. “His power level is far too low to be able to unleash an attack like that!”

Baba cackled. “White Flag!” she called out. “It’s a shielding spell… but rather than merely protect a person they can take the Ki blast and briefly redistribute it before firing it back at their opponent!”

“Hmmm,” Piccolo said, uncrossing his arms. “Not bad… not bad at all. But still not enough to-“

“Black Parade!” I shouted, deciding to push my luck. From my body burst several shadowy duplicates of myself, which raced at Piccolo in a straight line like linesmen rushing a quarterback. Piccolo, having not expected that, jerking back as each magical construct hit him, sending him skidding back. I smirked at that, rather proud of that little move; I had only recently mastered it and-

Piccolo suddenly appeared in front of me, smacking me in the side of the head and sending me crashing to the ground.

“Don’t get arrogant,” he said coldly. “You are doing better but you still aren’t anywhere near my level.”

“Right, right,” I said, working my jaw back and forth, hearing it click as I did so. “And considering you probably used a 10th of your strength there?”

“A 10th would have taken your head off,” the Namekian stated.

“Yeah… direct attacks aren’t going to work.” I slowly got to my feet, rubbing my cheek. “So I have to be sneaky. Solar Flare!”

Just as I expected Piccolo shut his eyes. Which was fine… delightful even. Because I wanted his eyes shut.

Because instead of intense light… I sent out intense darkness.

“What!” Chiaotzu exclaimed. “What kind of Solar Flare is that?” he asked as I used my magic to send out a wave of shadows that blotted out the sun. I blinked my eyes, casting another spell to give me nightvision, and smirked when I saw that Piccolo, having finally opened his eyes, finding himself still in darkness.

“Just because I shout something doesn’t meant that’s the name of the attack,” I pointed out and Piccolo twisted around… in the wrong direction. “Blackout. Instead of blinding light I unleash blinding darkness.”

“Clever,” Piccolo said, still going in the wrong direction. “But sight isn’t everything!”

“That’s true,” I said as Piccolo reached out… and snagged nothing. “Good thing I combined Blackout with White Noise to throw my voice.”

“Whoa, you can do that?” Goku exclaimed, waving his hand in front of his face, still marveling at being trapped in complete darkness. “Perform two attacks and combine them together?”

“And why not?” Roshi demanded. “Many attacks start off as smaller, more simple ones that get merged with others! Use your brain Goku, you know that!”

“Well… okay, I guess that makes sense,” Goku admitted. “But its still surprising, you know?”

Piccolo grit his teeth. “Sneaky… but it won’t help!” He began to thrust out his hands rapidly, firing off a barrage of ki blasts. They were small and wouldn’t do much damage even to me but at that point he was looking to hit me… which was a good strategy as at the moment performing Blackout and White Noise together was draining my magical reserves.

Time for the big finish.

I crept towards Piccolo, doing my best to avoid his ki blasts. Which wasn’t easy as he was really laying it on thick. Honestly it made me wonder if he would figure out Hellzone Grenade sooner rather than later. Whatever the case might be I continued until I was just a few feet away… and let White Noise and Blackout drop.

“There you are!” Piccolo declared, firing another ki blast at me.

Right as I performed White Flag.

But as Piccolo moved to block the reflected Ki Blast I instead channeled it into my hand, hollding it and forcing it to wrap around my fist.

“White Knuckle!” I roared as I leapt forward and swung a punch right at Piccolo’s head.

He easily caught me by the throat.

“Good try,” he said with a smirk before bringing his free hand to my stomach. “But if this where a real fight? You’d be dead.”

“Point taken,” I managed to get out and after a moment Piccolo dropped me to the ground.

“That was amazing, Kayos!” Bulma cheered once she sensed the fight was over. “You did so well!”

“He lost,” Baba said with a dismissive sniff. “And Piccolo was holding back.”

“He lost to one of the most powerful fighters in the world!” Roshi declared, smacking his staff into the ground.

“So what? He can wield magic!”

“And that was only with barely half a year of training!” Roshi continued to argue.

“I would have defeated Piccolo with only 3 months,” Baba said and even I knew that was a lie.

“And no one to practice with other than you!”

That made Baba turn towards her brother and really get into his face. “What is that supposed to mean, you withered old goat?”

“I think you know what it means!”

I glanced at Isco as I got to my feet. “So, gonna join in on harping on me?”

“Oh no sir, I wouldn’t do that,” Isco replied rather cheerfully. “They are doing it so well. No… I believe I will wait for a while, let you recover from your battered ego, believe the wounds have healed… and then rip that scab right off!”

“…Isco, you are a wonderful human being,” I muttered only to notice a shadow fall upon me. I turned and craned my neck up. It had been so odd to meet the Z Warriors. Goku cut such an impressive figure on the screen but meeting him and finding him forced to looking up at me, with only his hair making him look taller, had been so very odd. But Piccolo? He towered over me by nearly a foot and a half, making me feel rather small. A rare sensation. “Uh… hi?”

“You were a fool during that,” Piccolo said firmly.

“Yeah, I got that when you caught me,” I said. “And the bitch slap too.” I rubbed my jaw.

“Knock that off, I know how to control myself. You were more startled than anything else.” That much was true and I let my hand drop to my side. “And I mean it. You were a fool. Going in for that direct attack was a moronic move. Your strengths are in deception… you need to play to that.”

I blinked, processing what he had said. “Okay…”

“You know what I mean,” Piccolo grunted. “You are never going to be someone that charges in and lands a flurry of blows on someone. That isn’t how you win. You outsmart your foes. That Solar Flare trick was good.” He smiled at that, which was rather terrifying. “I’m going to steal it.”

“Go right ahead,” I said, figuring that was the safest way for me to respond.

“Blackout and White Noise worked well too. And White Flag is a good final gambit. Black Parade might work well if you learn how to power it up.” He paused, pressing his lips together. “Can you move while using it? Because if you can you’d be smart to escape while performing it.”

I hadn’t thought of that, more focused on just learning how to project the magical constructions and get them to do what I wanted. But… Piccolo’s idea was a good one.

“I’ll look into it.”

“Good,” Piccolo said before smirking again. “Because our next fight? I won’t be holding back.”

“Uh, next fight?” I asked only for Piccolo to walk away. “Next fight?”

“Congratulations sir,” Isco said, “you are going to die.”

~Later That Evening~

Gohan giggled and laughed, throwing his arms up into the air as the fireworks went off, causing an explosion of yellows, oranges, and reds to fill up the night sky. He was sitting on Tien’s shoulders, the triclops having offering Gohan ‘the best seat in the house’ and Chichi had merely chuckled and waved her boy off, trusting ‘Uncle Tien’ to keep him safe.

“That was a good one!” Roshi declared, moving over to Kayos waving him away from the grill. “I got it! You take a break!”

“You sure?” Kayos asked, flipping one of the burgers.

“More than sure! Ya go get somethin’ ta eat!”

Kayos smiled, walking over to the platter of food and selecting a large spicy sausage, setting it into a bun and lathering it with mustard before moving on to the burgers.

“Let’em fly, Isco!” Bulma cheered, a bit tipsy after having broken into the beer a touch early. The drone fired off a small laser and another rocket went shrieking into the sky, exploding and illuminating the beach.

“I have to admit,” Piccolo said, drinking from a tall glass, a burger in his hand (he had scoffed when Kayos had once said that he only survived on water, saying that while he COULD do that he much preferred a wider diet), “whatever you added to this does make it more… flavorful.”

Chiaotzu nodded. “I find that those flavor pouches are too strong so I dilute mine. Only a quarter into a gallon.”

Chichi wandered over to Roshi, looking him up and down. “You only get ONE joke,” she said before selecting a sausage.

“Heh,” Roshi said, rubbing his nose. “Year ago I’d have taken you up on that… don’t feel right now ta do it.”

“So Goku…”

Roshi’s smile grew more gentle. “Told me I was as much a father to him as Grandpa Gohan? Yeah… big lug was all tongue tied but…”

Chichi smirked before sloooooowly slid the sausage, without a bun, into her mouth, causing the old man to gasp, blood bursting from his nose. That caused Chichi to laugh before she helped him up, the two discussing their favorite ways to prepare meat.

Kayos, for his part, settled down on a chair near the water, plate on his lap as he decided which of his two meals to start first. A radio was playing classic rock, though the fireworks were making it a touch hard to hear it at times.

“Hey!” Goku called out, carefully walking up to Kayos with a platter of burgers balanced on one hand, the other holding two cans of pop. “Mind if I join you?”

“Sure,” Kayos said, taking one of the pops from Goku. “Thanks.”

“Nice to eat with someone who doesn’t drink. I never understood why people like that stuff.” He stuck out his tongue in disgust.

“Preach, Brother Goku, preach!”

Goku chuckled at that before wolfing down a few burgers, watching the sky erupting in light and booms. Kayos was a bit slower than Goku but still ate his burger and sausage (alternating between the two) at a rather fast pace.

“…I am, you know.”

“Hmmm?”

“You’re brother,” Goku said. “I know its only been a few months but… how you’ve helped me and my family? That makes you my brother, Kayos.”

The blond stared at Goku for a long moment before holding out his fist. “Pound it.” He held up his other hand. “Gently pound it.”

Goku laughed and bumped his fist into Kayos’.

And then… the radio suddenly filled with static before a voice came over it, loud and clear… and familiar.

“If you are receiving this message it means that you have found yourself in a world that isn’t your own. For you it may have only been moments… or centuries. But no matter the time… I know you are scared. So I send this message to you all across the Multiverse. One I wish I had received when I began this journey. I… am Edwin Chaos of Earth-1. And I ask you to remember this simple fact: While you face threats that you could never have imagined…you… are not alone.”

“Hey, what was that?” Goku asked.

“I’m not sure,” Kayos said, rising up. “But I think we better keep training, Goku.”

Chapter Text

“No.”

Chichi frowned as he looked directly at Piccolo, mimicking him in folding her arms over her chest and glowering at the tall green fighter. “No?”

“No.”

“…that’s all you have to say?”

Piccolo let out a snort of annoyance. “I’m not your husband, I don’t have to give my reasons to you.”

“In other words you don’t have a reason,” she retorted. Piccolo narrowed his eyes but Chichi held firm. Maybe a year or so ago she would have backed down, thanks to settling into the life of a wife and mother. It had made her less anxious to fight and feud and as such she most likely wouldn’t have even tried to ask Piccolo for his help, let alone pressed him on the issue.

‘But you aren’t that woman anymore,’ she thought to herself as she stood in the clearing that Piccolo had staked out at his own. ‘I’d say you are back to being the woman you were during the last World Martial Arts Tournament… but even that isn’t true.’ She mentally smirked. ‘You’re better.’

After Kayos had put it into her head to find out what Goku wanted… well, things had changed. Goku was far more interested in her now and not merely because she would go on runs with him. No… Goku liked watching her train. Liked seeing her try each day to punch a little harder, kick a little higher. Because she could talk to him about different training regiments he was more open to talking to her. She’d tried to get him interested in other hobbies but he’d always moaned like a child… now however, because she was sharing in his interests he tried to share hers. It often didn’t work but they had found a few common interests. Goku wasn’t a fan of reading but he actually LOVED being read to. When they retired for the evening she often found herself with Goku nuzzling against her, a smile on his face as she read from one of her favorite novels.

“Your voice is just so soothing,” he’d told her one time when she’d asked him why he seemed to become so relaxed when she read to him. “Makes me feel like nothing in the world could ever give us a problem.”

And then there were the more… carnal benefits.

Chichi hadn’t really realized how soft she had been getting over the last few years until she’d tried on some of her old fighting clothes and discovered how snug they were. She’d set a goal to fit into them and when she’d met that challenge she’d decided to push further. Strengthen her arms and legs, get her tummy as hard as she could. She liked how it made her feel… and Goku VERY much liked how she looked now.

‘We’ve made love more times in the last 2 months than we did in the last 2 years!’

All of that had boosted her confidence. She no longer felt like she was an old woman that just hadn’t gotten wrinkles yet. Now she felt young again… vitality thrumming through her. She might not like the idea of fighting because of the risks… but she understood WHY they had to fight and after they dealt with Raditz she didn’t plan to stop training. Even if she never did more than spar… she appreciated all that the training had done for her.

Which was why as she stood there in her modified take on Goku’s Gi, hands folded just under her breasts and steel in her gaze, she didn’t waiver for a second in staring Piccolo down.

“We need your help to make sure we are resupplied,” Chichi stated.

“Why me?” Piccolo demanded. “I’m not the only one on this island.”

“True,” she admitted. “But I can’t take Goku. Do you realize how risky it is to take him shopping?”

~One Year Earlier~

“I thought since those samples had toothpicks in them anything with a toothpick was a sample!” Goku said, holding up the massive glazed ham he’d stabbed a toothpick in. Chichi groaned, seeing their budget go down the drain, even as Goku began to bite into said ham.

~MC~MC~MC~

“Well, I’ll give you that,” Piccolo admitted. “But what about the others?”

“Tien and Chiaotzu went off to get more texts about Tien’s people. According to the scroll he might be able to find more about the triclops at some library in the East. Krillin isn’t back yet from training, Bulma is locked in her lab, Roshi…”

~MC~MC~MC~

“HOW ARE WE OUT OF KLEENEX AGAIN!?!” Bulma screamed, looking at the empty boxes littered outside of Roshi’s room.

~MC~MC~MC~

“…is busy. And Kayos is coming but…” she paused.

“What about him?”

“Kayos is a friend,” Chichi said softly, “but if something were to happen… I trust you to get Gohan to safety. Only you are strong enough to get him out of any danger.”

Piccolo blinked at that.

“…fine,” he huffed. “But we do this as quick as we can. I’m not interested in window shopping.” He shut his eyes in annoyance. “Going to cost me a lot of meditation time…”

Chichi quickly bowed before moving to leave, knowing that she had won a victory but it wouldn’t be wise to press her luck. “Thank you, Piccolo! We’ll be leaving tomorrow just after morning warm ups! I want to be done by lunch!”

“Hhmmmpf,” was Piccolo’s only response.

~MC ~MC~MC~

“What a pathetic little planet this is,” Vegeta declared as he and Nappa landed on the dusty orange planet. While they could survive quite a long time in their pods, a whole year in fact, without having to do much that didn’t mean that the two Saiyans didn’t enjoy stretching their legs or finding something to eat. Battle Meditation could only get one so far, after all. “What is it called again?”

Nappa, without missing a beat, declared, “Arlia. Home to an insectoid species known as the Arlians.” He paused, debating if he wished to say more. Sometimes Vegeta wanted as much information as he could get… and other times he wasn’t interested at all. His father had been the same way…

The bald Saiyan’s heart ached just a bit at that, as it always did when he remembered the Saiyan that had done so much for him.

‘I wouldn’t even be here if it weren’t for the King’s kindness,’ Nappa thought to himself before saying aloud, “The Arlians have been considered for some time to be a planet Frieza may be interested in claiming.”

“You mean its being watched,” Vegeta said darkly, slowly turning towards Nappa, eyes narrowed.

“Not watched!” Nappa said quickly, looking to pacify the younger man’s temper. “Just considered, that is all! On the cusp of monitoring. A C-Listed planet.”

Vegeta waited for several long moments, Nappa tense and ready for the blow that might come… and then nodded. “Very well then. So long as it isn’t a B-Listed planet.”

“It isn’t!” Nappa was quick to say. “I checked the records while we were flying down here… the next review isn’t for another 18 months. Frieza has other things right now that he is working on… the Space Patrol has begun creeping back towards the edges of the Empire and there is talk that King Zeno is done with his play date-“

“I don’t care about any of that, Nappa,” Vegeta said gruffly. “There will be enough time to consider politics when I rule the Empire. For now let’s see if these Arlians have any decent food.” With that he lifted off into the air before rocketing off, Nappa quickly following him.

As he did so he found himself not looking at their surroundings or considering what they’d have to do next in order to defeat Frieza and finally remove themselves from under his thumb. No… his mind drifted back to King Vegeta and his own past and how both had led him to where he was now.

Nappa had a reputation of being a dumb brute. More than one person had proclaimed he was just a walking fist; that he was bald because his head was just a thumb and the rest of his body clenched fingers going in for a pounding. And he had no problem with people thinking that because there was, honestly, some truth to that. He wasn’t the smartest warrior in Frieza’s army… he did his research, same as anyone else, though he tended to only gleam the basic facts. Arlia, for example… he had no idea their fighting styles or their weaponry or anything like that. He’d just grabbed the bare bones because that was good enough for him. A planet that was being observed from time to time but wasn’t heavily monitored. Insectoid populace. Nothing else.

They didn’t need anything else.

So because of things like that, of him only getting a small bit of information before rushing out, everyone thought he was a complete idiot. And he’d chuckle when they called him that… right before he pounded their skulls into their torsos so they learned NEVER to insult a Saiyan. But he did wonder sometimes what the younger Frieza Force members would have thought if they could have seen him in his youth and prime. Because that was when he had truly earned the reputation of dumb brute.

‘An idiot, that’s what I was,’ Nappa thought t himself as they flew on. ‘One that nearly got himself killed.’

People thought he had come to work for King Vegeta because he had tried to usurp him. That was how many other members of his inner circle had come under the power of the King. They tried to prove themselves his better, they failed, and they swore on their honor to submit and obey. Nappa let people believe that. It was more honorable.

It was a lie.

He and the rest of his squad had been hungry and smelled food, deciding to go grab it and fill their bellies after a rather long mission purging a planet. They’d expected a few pieces of meat, maybe a stew or some noodle dishes, but instead had found a feast. Their mouths had watered and at once the idea of grabbing a bit and flying off had left their minds. Nappa himself had declared that they would just claim the entire banquet for themselves, screw anyone that complained!

And complain they did. Loudly. This wasn’t for them. And certainly not ALL of it. Maybe a bit if they showed respect-

Nappa himself had driven his fist through the stomach of the low class bitch who had decided to scold him. He’d enjoyed that… though her spitting up blood on his arm had been annoying as he had just scrubbed most of the filth off of him. His hunger had finally won out and he’d tossed the bitch aside and sat down to begin tearing into the meat, savoring its flavors and being delighted that the dead woman had been able to really bring out the textures of the food.

As it had turned out that was her entire job. She had been a cook…

King Vegeta’s favorite cook.

The rage of the King… it still haunted Nappa even decades later. He had landed with the speed of an asteroid but his feet hadn’t even kicked up any dust, he had that much control even in his furious state. He had looked at them all, cold eyes lingering upon each of them, and as he had done so the food had suddenly tasted like ashes on Nappa’s tongue. And when he’d spotted the cook and how her blood was still on Nappa’s armor…

The hour that followed had been a beautiful lesson in how to tear apart a life.

Every strike had been utterly precise. Not a drop of ki wasted. He knew just how hard to strike, when to lash out, and when was the right moment to do so. He had moved about so quickly yet it had also been in slow motion, so that every single second of that utter beatdown had been etched into Nappa’s brain. He had thought himself a good fighter back then but King Vegeta had shown he was a worm wiggling in the dirt when compared to a true master. The blows had been furious but there had been a logic behind each and every one of them. They all flowed, one action leading to the next. One moment he was to Nappa’s right, brutally taking the leg off of Romin, causing the overweight Saiyan to scream even as the heat of the blow cauterized the wound and made sure not a drop of blood left his body or the limb. He used that momentum to send himself hurtling across the battlefield, landing in front of Nio and ripping his head clean off his shoulders before he’d flung the skull right at Nappa, cracking his jaw and sending him to the ground. And that had allowed King Vegeta to get around him and go back to Romin, pounding into him with a flurry of punches.

One hour. A lesson in true power.

And when Nappa had foolishly tried to attack the King, believing for one brain addled moment that he could defeat him and make him submit… the King had put him down so hard that Nappa’s next memory was waking up in a healing pod.

With his King staring at him with cold eyes.

“You cost me a cook,” he had declared. “And then you dared attack me. To try and force me to submit. You are beaten. And since I doubt one of your intelligence knows how to do more than throw meat on the fire… you are going to do EVERYTHING I say.” He had then broken the pod open and Nappa, so weak he couldn’t even stand, had fallen onto the floor at King Vegeta’s feet. And the man had stared at him… before holding out his hand. “Take it.”

And he had.

Every order. Every command. Once Nappa had been healed up he had made it his life’s work to obey his King. It went beyond Saiyan honor. Yes, he had tried to attack the king and after being put in his place and submitting King Vegeta had offered him a hand up. As he should. But… it was more than that for him. The King… he had shown him how to be better. A better fighter. A better commander. Nappa knew he would never be a tenth of what the man was but if he could be close to a tenth…

It was why he honored his word even now, acting on his liege’s final command: protect my son.

‘I have been by his side since that command was given… and I will remain at his side until I draw my last breath. I can not replace King Vegeta as a father… but I can be a mentor, a teacher, and a friend to his son.’

With that thought Nappa moved to fly side by side with his Prince.

~MC~MC~MC~

“At least we don’t have to carry everything,” I commented as I watched Chichi talk with the grocer. Due to just how much food we needed to have, thanks to having two Saiyans on the island, there was simply no way we were going to be transporting everything we needed to get ourselves. No… shopping with Chichi was different than what I was used to.

It was rather like how I thought shopping for a restaurant would be like. Which we were kind of running only is was a private one for only a small group of regulars. Chichi would go to a different grocer and look over their meat, their fish, their vegetables, their fruits, and give her opinion of what she was willing to spend. Even though we were using Bulma’s money she still would barter, trying to get the best deal. When we’d been looking over bags of flour she had complained about the texture and the color even though, to me, it looked like flour, and gotten the man to lower his price. With the fish she had carefully inspected the catch as well as what was already frozen to determine if it was better to take the older stuff that was already on ice or the fresh stuff that would cost extra to be packaged but would be done so to her desires. The fruits were handled like she was examining diamonds and she’d sampled a few carrots and celery stalks before deciding they met her standards.

The entire time Piccolo and I stood off to the side, keeping Gohan entertained.

“I still don’t see why we needed to be here for all this,” Piccolo muttered.

“Well, I’m supposed to be getting in some Evil Magic work,” I stated, looking over at cart where a baby was eating a sucker. With a casual flick of my wrist I ripped the candy from him, the babe blinking before beginning to sniff and whine. Which is when Isco floated over and gave him an even BIGGER lollipop to enjoy.

One might argue that was cheating. But the Evil of the act apparently counted, according to the detection spells I was running on myself that monitored my increase in Evil magic.

Tossing the candy in the trash (which was wasting food… soooooo evil…) I glanced at Piccolo. “Besides, there is something I’ve learned about this group which perfectly explains why you needed to come.”

“That you can’t do anything without holding each other’s hands?” he asked gruffly.

“Look who’s talking,” I said, glancing down. Piccolo followed my gaze to find that at some point Gohan had walked up to him and taking his hand, holding onto it as he merely stood there, watching his mother shop. Piccolo went ramrod still, eyes wide and lips pulled back into a grimace of shock, before he just as quickly resettled into calm aloofness. “And no,” I said, deciding not to tease him any farther as while Piccolo was mellowing out I could sense he wasn’t quite at that stage yet were he could handle playful ribbing. “What I was going to say is I’ve noticed that none of these people can take two feet out into the real world without getting into trouble. And while Chichi is getting stronger and I have some tricks now… you are still are Ace in the Hole.”

“Your… what?”

“Ace in the Hole.”

“What is that?”

“It’s a metaphor.”

“For what?”

“For… for being really important.”

“Then why don’t you just say I am very important?”

“I don’t know its just something people say!” I complained.

“I’ve never heard anyone say anything like that,” Piccolo said before looking down at Gohan. “Have you ever heard of this ‘Ace in the Hole’ thing?”

“No, Mr. Piccolo,” Gohan said, shaking his head.

“Well, that proves that,” Piccolo stated.

“It’s just an expression,” I said, growing exasperated.

“I thought you said it was a metaphor,” Piccolo stated, as if he had just caught me in the world’s biggest lie.

“Seriously?!?” I complained. “A metaphor and an expression can be the same thing!”

“Is that true Gohan?”

I cut the little boy off before he could say anything. “Nevermind! My point is that you are our best bet if something happens to us! Which it will because the Z Fighters are magnets for trouble.”

“Well,” Chichi said, walking over to us, “it’s a good thing then that I’m not a Z Fighter, nor are the rest of you,” Chichi said. “So we’ll be fine.”

“…you… invited… him…” I ground out.

“Oh, one can never be too careful, Kayos. After all, my house has never been robbed but I still lock the doors at night…hmmm.” She tapped her chin with her finger. “I should really call up my father, make sure he’s doing okay.”

“Can’t you do that back at the island?” Piccolo asked, clearly not looking forward to any distractions that might delay us from getting back to training.

We followed Chichi out of the grocery store, Gohan still holding onto Piccolo’s hand, having to take 3 steps for his one but still hustling to make sure he kept up with the green man. “I’d rather do it now… the reception isn’t the greatest on the island-“ something that made my Spidey-Sense tingle because Bulma should have the best… I smelled plot contrivance, “-and I do want to make sure I can look him in the eye when we talk… if its just his voice he can lie but he has never been able to avoid telling me the truth if I’m staring him down.”

We made our way to a bank of public video phones and Chichi dialed in the number, a few moments later the Ox King answered. “Chichi!” he said happily. “How are you?”

“I’m well, daddy,” she said, taking Gohan from Piccolo and lifting him up so he was visible. “We just wanted to check in on you… are things going well there?”

“OH, very much so! Some of the new methods I’ve been working on to increase radish growth have been working quite well! Why-“

As they talked Isco floated over to me. “Sir. I have a concern.”

“If its about the phone I do think you should have one built into you… but we keep it from the others. Don’t want them tying you up.”

“Yes, because I don’t need to interact with your fleshy bags of bile and pus any more than I need to. However that isn’t my concern. You see… while we were in the grocer I began reviewing the footage of our trip here, to see if there was anything of use for the documentary-“ And I wondered how long we’d have to keep that up before I could just say fuck it, we’re Z Fighters now, “-and I noticed that we are being followed.”

“What?” I asked, Piccolo shifting closer to us upon hearing that.

“Indeed. The same gentleman keeps snooping about. Dark hair, long face, black suit and sunglasses. Has a small cassette recorder that he speaks into from time to time though I am unable to gather what he is saying.”

I frowned. That… didn’t match the description of anyone I knew of from the canon events. I looked at Piccolo but he seemed just as confused as me.

“Okay, so we’ll just need to monitor the situation and make sure that he isn’t causing any problems,” I said. “He might just be lusting after Chichi or curious about you Piccolo. Now that we know he’s around we can counter him.”

“Well, I see you need to go, sweetie,” the Ox King declared. “I’m getting a message that the phone call needs to end because you are being taken prisoner…” He tilted his head at that. “Wait, that doesn’t sound right.”

Before any of us could react the video phone booth suddenly slammed its doors on Chichi and Gohan, the two crying out as they dropped like a rock into the ground, a steel barrier slamming in place where it had been.

“You were saying sir?” Isco said.

“God damn it I’m glad I finally mastered levitating!” I shouted even as Piccolo thrust out his hands and easily blasted through the metal. “Come on!” I called out as I focused, activating the spell that allowed me to rise in the air; it had only been a few days since I’d gotten enough power in order to achieve flight but it was still a fucking rush. “Let’s see where they are going!”

“Right,” Piccolo said and the three of us rocketed down into the hole.

~MC~MC~MC~

“So,” Master Roshi said with a sniff, running his finger under his nose, “what exactly is it yar workin’ on, Bulma? This is the first time I’ve seen ya outside your lab in ages!”

Bulma grimaced at that. She knew she had been a bit… anti-social… in the last few months. She tried to come up and see the others whenever she could but her mind was just buzzing with all sorts of ideas, now that she’d decided she didn’t want to merely help outfit the others with new body armor and the like but that she wanted to HELP.

It wasn’t all inventing, of course. She had been studying Isco’s recordings, watching Goku and the others train and figuring out how she could counter their attacks. She only had a little bit of footage focused on Raditz but the other Z Fighters were slowly growing in strength, moving to be as powerful as him, and that meant that they would be a good source of info on just what she needed to deal with. How to survive a full force punch. How to counter Ki blasts. Their own strengths and weaknesses that Bulma could exploit.

While her trip to the swimming pool to cool down and actually do something other than lean over a work table while wiring up some new tech wasn’t the first time that she’d been out of her lab recently… it was the first time in nearly a week that she’d run into anyone else.

“I mean, been a while since we’ve seen ya!” Rohsi declared, for once NOT leering at her as she paddled up to the edge of the pool. Bulma wondered if giving him that little tablet might have been the smartest move they’d ever done. If it kept Roshi’s perverted ways in check then it was certainly money well spent!

“Sorry about that,” she said, looking at the old man who was currently reclining on a pool chair, a flowering tropical drink nearby. “I’ve been keeping weird hours recently. This is the first time I’ve gone for a swim while the sun is up.”

“Moonlight swimmin’. Eh, nothing wrong with that. But we do miss ya, Bulma.”

“I know,” she said sadly, feeling horrible for avoiding the others. “And I miss you all too. Its just really important that I get all of this work takin’ care of.”

“And what work is that?” Roshi pressed again.

Bulma poked at the inside of her cheek. “Well, I am working on new training equipment for all of you. Its like your weighted gear but… okay, so you know about the gravity chamber Kayos suggested?”

“It’s a brilliant idea!” Roshi proclaimed. They had been discussing just what Yamcha might be going through, the kind of training, when Kayos had mentioned that it was possible that Otherworld might have different gravity and thus allow Yamcha to train as if he were always wearing weighted clothing. That had led to an entire discussion about the benefits that increased gravity could have (similar to but also different from the underwater training Piccolo, Goku, Tien, and Chiaotzu were undergoing) and eventually Bulma had hit upon the idea for a gravity chamber, a place that was able to replicate increased or decreased gravity.

“Well, that got me thinking about using the reverse of that tech to create super lightweight clothing that still had a heavy density… so it would be like wearing armor but it would move and weigh the same as that shirt you are wearing.”

“Well… that would be a grand benefit!” Roshi proclaimed, growing excited. “Not only in terms of a fight… but also being able to be stylish!”

Bulma rolled her eyes at that. “I’ve seen your definition of ‘style’, Roshi.”

“Hmmmpf,” he huffed, “you young kids wouldn’t know style if it bit ya on the butt!”

Bulma merely smirked though inside she was feeling bad. She did want to tell him what else she was working on… the gear for herself that would allow her to help Goku and their friends in a fight… but she knew what they would say. Bulma wasn’t a fighter and shouldn’t be getting into fights. It was too dangerous. Too risky.

But… it was dangerous for them too…

Bulma frowned when she heard something crack just beyond the pool, where the tile met the jungle. Swimming away from Roshi she made her way to the opposite side of the pool area, frowning as she peered through the leafy green barrier…

…and let out a screen as she saw glowing eyes suddenly race towards her.

~MC~MC~MC~

“So… this is a deep tunnel,” I said as Piccolo and I continued to fly down the long shaft. It had been a vertical drop for about a minute before it had suddenly shifted 90 degrees, sending us on a straight shot racing down the rather large path. We occasionally saw different large circular doors, all closed and sealed with magnetic locks, but otherwise it was a straight shot.

Piccolo and I were able to flying beside each other, with him in his classic arms folded/head forward position while I was just standing up, looking like I was riding a people mover at an airport. I had figured out that thanks to my magic I didn’t have to worry about being aerodynamic as I wasn’t actually ‘flying’. Rather I was shifting my form… a slower teleportation, honestly, one that was visible to the naked eye. So I could stand, sit, do sit ups and it would be exactly the same. A thin barrier of magic protected me from any projectiles, just like a Ki aura, and my magic sent me hurtling along.

I frowned, looking about even as I ‘walked’ around Piccolo. “Whoever did this either has money or knew about this.”

“Neither of which bold well for what we might fight,” Piccolo said.

“Yes and no,” I said with a shrug.”Money might mean that they are able to hire goons to take us out but that also means that they themselves don’t know how to fight.”

“So?”

“Kill’em and the goons have no reason to keep fighting.”

Piccolo raised an eyebrow (or rather what would be an eyebrow for him) at that. “After all these months I’d forgotten how dishonorable you could be.” And then he flashed me a sinister little smile. “I like it.”

“I can’t bench press a house like Goku… I need my own ways to win and being underhanded is my best bet.”

Isco chose that moment to chime in. “Sir? I am detecting a large increase in electrical currents around us. All flowing in the direction we are going. Something is sucking up quite a bit of energy, as far as I can tell.”

“Hmmm,” I said, not quite sure what to think about that. “Would it be easy for us to attack the power cables? Cut them off?” Piccolo and I slowed so Isco could scan the wall.

“…negative, sir,” he finally said. “I am afraid there are too many of them and buried far too deep. We would alert whoever is using them before we could cut them all.”

“It was a good idea,” Piccolo said as he took off again, Isco and I flying after him. “But now we need to focus on the fight. If these people know any real fighting moves-“

“Stay out, stay sneaky,” I said. “Yeah, even if they are at half your level…”

“That wasn’t what I was going to say,” Piccolo said when I trailed off. “I would say right now you could beat Krillin or Tien when they first began training. Don’t get freaked out if they begin throwing punches or kicks your way… you can fight them.”

I blinked at that, surprised.

Piccolo let out a sigh. “In your first fight it’s only natural for you to be scared. You suddenly have people trying to hurt you and you begin overthinking things. Worrying about how to defend, how to attack. Don’t. You aren’t the weakling you were when I first met you. Your magic doesn’t give you an edge… it gives you miles on them.”

“…thanks,” I said.

“Just stating a fact, nothing more.”

I managed a nod at that and we flew on in silence.

It took another five minutes for us to see the end of the tunnel and by that point I figured we had to be well out of the city; hell, we’d left the city within the first minute of us shifting to a horizontal flight plane. Now we had to be possibly across the country. Which made it all the more concerning that the Tunnel had been that long and we hadn’t managed to find Chichi or Gohan. Whatever the tunnel was and wherever it led to weren’t good things, I knew that now.

We burst through the opening and found ourselves in a large underground structure, the ceiling a massive dome that was patched up with steel plates that had been bolted onto the reddish-orange rock like attachments on a cyborg. The walls were filled with different cube-like cells, heavy bars across each one and walkways that allowed one to stroll past each level of the stacked prisons. A massive computer screen like that found at a sports arena hung on one wall and I could see all sorts of different counters and tables filled with different experiments. Bunsen beakers and Petri dishes. Computers running calculations. Microscopes with stacks of slides.

“Mr. Piccolo!” Gohan called out and we twisted to see the boy in a cell, grabbing onto the bars and giving them a shake. “Mr. Kayos.”

I narrowed my eyes. “Piccolo?”

“Yeah?”

“Whoever put him in that cage dies… slowly. I want Hell to be utterly ashamed when we give their soul because they know they can’t match us.”

Piccolo’s eyes widened at that before he nodded, turning his focus back on Gohan. “Where is your mother?”

“I’m over here!” Chichi called out from a different cell, having been separated from Gohan.

“Do you know what is going on? Why you are here?” Piccolo asked.

“They are here because of the invaders,” a voice called out. “And now… one has walked right into my inner sanctum.”

We both turned to look at the new arrival. He had dark hair that had been styled so that it stood up and puffed out a bit and he had on dark sunglasses that hid his eyes. His chin was covered in a 5 o’clock shadow, making his lean sharp features look all the more scruffy. His lean body was clad in a dark suit, a white dress shirt the only part of his clothing that was as dark as moonless night. He slowly walked towards us, Piccolo and I lowering to the ground to meet him on quite literally equal footing, his polished black shoes not making a sound as he marched over to us, tucking his arms behind him.

“Technically we’re only intruders because you kidnapped our friends,” I said. “Now, if you are willing to give us back Chichi and Gohan we might be willing to head out without any other trouble.” I was lying, of course… he’d kidnapped my friends and put Gohan in a cage; he was going to suffer. ‘Baba keeps saying I need to build up more Evil deeds to power up my Evil Magic. I think viciously tearing this bastard up might JUST be evil enough for her.’

Piccolo spoke up at that moment. “All we want are those two back. And you have to see that you are greatly outnumbered. We didn’t want to intrude here-“

“That isn’t the intrusion I am speaking of,” the man said, taking another step forward. “I speak of an invasion of earth. An invasion… from the stars.”

“…aw shit,” I muttered to myself.

“Indeed,” the man said with a dark smile.

“If I might interject,” Isco said, floating over to him, “would it not be polite to introduce yourself first? Otherwise you are just annoying thin meat bag with puffy hair to me.”

I grimaced at Isco’s brash tones but surprisingly enough the man merely smirked. “A well thought out point.” He gave a crisp bob of his head. “I am Agent Mutton of the GCJ: Global Council of Justice.” He said that like he expected us to be impressed by the title. When none of us… I don’t know… gasped or let out cries of ‘This can’t be!’ he merely pressed his lips into a fine line and continued on. “It is my task to protect the Earth from threats… and despite my superiors’ claims that I have become distracted-“ His tone grew bitter at that and I had a feeling he’d been on the receiving end of more than one call demanding he get back to fucking work, “-I have come to see that the greatest threat to the Earth are aliens like you.”

He moved to a keyboard that sat on a desk and began typing away at it while I turned to Piccolo and whispered, “So I’m new to the whole ‘I have powers and can fight’ thing but should we be offended that he’s ignoring the threat we pose and is just turning his back to us?”

Piccolo huffed before replying in a soft voice, “We make him pay for that insult later when we surprise him.” I nodded at that just as the massive display screen lit up, revealing a picture of the earth that slowly began to rotate.

“I have long sought out the truth concerning the many different disasters and calamities that have befallen the Earth. Its out there… the answers. I just had to dig. But I was able to finally discover it.” On the map points of light appeared in different areas, followed by lines that raced up and down and across the map. “The pattern. These events aren’t random moments, like how you might find a penny on the sidewalk or a bird might poop on your head or a janitor finally finds the peephole into the women’s locker room and covers it up.” The lines began to glow… or rather some of them began to glow while other ones remaining dull. “By focusing on the true calamities and not the ones that were created to hide the truth I am able to find the truth and the truth within the truth!”

The lines finished glowing revealing the word ALIENS on the globe.

“Our world has been invaded by beings from the stars and these alien nightmares have caused so much pain and destruction. A perfectly planned attack upon our civilization to prevent us from rising up into a threat that could ruin their reign. Terrorizing our world, causing great upheavels, destroying what should have been glorious eras of advancement!”

Mutton began to pace, becoming far more emotional as he spoke, smacking his hand against his palm as he did so.

“Everything good and wonderful in our world that ended too soon is a result of you aliens! The fall of Rome! The destruction of the Library of Alexandria! The discontinuing of Choco Tacos!” Mutton slammed his fist against the table. “Bastards… you alien bastards destroy… everything! You even just made me break my hand!” He winced, cradling his fist against his chest.

Piccolo, Iso, and I shared a look.

“He’s been like this the entire time,” Chichi called down to us.

“And worst of all is the half breed.” He turned and glared at Gohan. To the boy’s credit all his training on the island had finally driven then frightened little boy away and left a far more determined and brave youngster. So when Mutton glowered at him Gohan merely met his gaze with one of his own. If he felt the burning of the dark stares Piccolo, Chichi, and I were standing his way Mutton didn’t acknowledge it. “Its bad enough that the alien freaks are arriving on this planet but now breading with our people, creating mixed raced monsters?” He shook his head. “No… no I will not let that stand. “

With that he walked over to a file cabinet and took a key from around his neck, carefully unlocking it before pulling out a large glowing samurai sword and a futuristic (even for the Dragon Ball World) ray gun that he slapped over his broken hand, the entire thing covered by the weapon.

“I have trained all my life for this moment-“

“That seems like a waste of time,” I muttered. “Like… were you a baby learning how to fight aliens?”

“-and now you will die, alien scum.” Piccolo tensed, falling into a battle ready stance as Mutton turned to stare at him. “Stay behind me, Earthling. I don’t know what promises that alien made you but I will protect you all the same!”

Piccolo… slowly blinked as we all realized just what Mutton had said.

“Wait… you think I’m an earthling?” He pointed to himself, just to make sure he was following things properly. Not that I blamed him as I was confused myself.

“I know you’re an earthling,” Mutton said before glaring at me. “And now that I have this alien male along with that alien female I will ensure that they pay for thinking that they could invade out planet!”

He pointed at me. “And he’s the alien?”

“Of course he is!” Mutton declared. “Look at him… with those strange eyes-“ I adjusted my glasses, “the fur around its mouth,” I tugged at my bread, “and the way it stands there… it is otherworldly.” He looked up at Chichi. “Just like that alien there! How she tricked an earth man into mating with something so hideous I’ll never know!”

Chichi began to rattle the bars of her cage, snapping insults at the agent for daring to mock her looks.

“Hold up!” I called out. “For my sanity-“

“Aliens don’t have sanity… or asthma.”

“-okay then. For my curiosity…” When he didn’t interrupt me I continued, “…how do you look at Piccolo and assume he’s human?”

“How do I not?” Mutton said, gesturing at Piccolo. “The build is all human.” I looked at Piccolo and fought the urge to poke at his arms with their strange pink… thingies (I still had no idea what those were).

“Pointed ears?” I asked.

“Surgery,” Mutton said simply. “Or a birth defect.” He shot me a dark look. “We HUMANS know how not to focus on people’s looks.”

“No we really don’t,” I muttered before saying louder, “The green skin?”

“Black, white, gray, green… it doesn’t matter to me.”

“Little. Green. Men.”

“A common term for Russian soldiers. Besides, you think this man is little?” Mutton shook his head before looking at Piccolo. “Can you believe this alien, fellow human?”

“For fuck’s sake,” I grumbled before turning to Piccolo and asking, “What are you?”

“A Namakian,” he said. “A Namekian.”

I gestured at Piccolo, staring directly at Mutton with an intense incredulous stare.

“…I do not care what new sexual preference you might be, my fellow human-“

“Fuck this,” I snarled and launched myself at Mutton, quickly casting a protection aura spell around myself. Mutton fired on me but the magic that coated my skin like a bodysuit caused the bullets to harmlessly drop to the ground as I ran at him, flicking my right arm out before I slammed it at him, chopping down on his wrist and causing him to drop his gun. “Piccolo, get Gohan and Chichi!”

The Namekian nodded and flew up to free the two, leaving me to battle Mutton.

“You know, even if I was an alien, which I’m fucking not you delusional little asshat, I haven’t done anything wrong. Blame the aliens that actually cause problems, yes, but the ones that just want to fucking live here in peace? Leave them alone! White Knuckle!” I charged Good Magic into my fist and clocked Agent Mutton hard in the gut, making him double over in pain. Before he could respond I grabbed his head, fingers latching onto his ears, and drove my knee into his face. There was a solid crack and when I let go the man fell limp to the ground. “Okay, either he is depressingly weak or I am freakishly strong now.”

“Depressingly weak,” Piccolo stated as he flew down with Gohan clinging to his back, Chichi right behind flying under her own power (a trick she had FINALLY managed to learn after all of us had spent an entire day teasing her about it, which included putting everything on REALLY high shelves).

“Thanks Piccolo, great motivational speech there,” I muttered. I walked over and nudged the downed agent with the toe of my shoe. “So… any suggestions on what we do with our new friend?”

“Just leave him be,” Chichi stated. “He knows now not to come after us.”

Piccolo and I shared a look; neither of us believed that for a fucking minute.

Gohan though chose that moment to let out a little yawn and I sighed, realizing that we were going to have to get out of here with nothing else done with Mutton. “She’s right… if he’s a government agent we can’t demand he be arrested. And he might squeal to people and cause us further problems.”

“Which is why I have already made sure to hamper him,” Isco said cheekily, reminding us all he was still there. “I took the liberty of downloading his files to my secure cloud network and then placing a virus in his system. The moment he tries to access any file it will not only erase them but also hunt down all his other files and erase them as well.” Isco paused. “I also used his personal email and credit card accounts to sign Master Roshi up for some adult websites.”

“That last part might be the most evil,” I commented.

“I just did what you would sir,” Isco said and I frowned as I felt my arms burn, the sensation of Evil Magic swelling in me rather startling.

“Seriously? That was enough… meh, okay.” I shrugged and looked to the others. “Lets get out of here.”

“Right,” Chichi said, gathering up Gohan. “I am done with this place.”

~MC~MC~MC~

Agent Mutton awoke an hour later to find the aliens gone and, after a few keystrokes on his computer, his life’s work destroyed.

“So then…” he muttered, “you have chosen destruction.”

He paused.

“…I really should have asked for his name. Darn it, Scullery is going to complain about that...”

~MC~MC~MC~

Piccolo looked down at the little boy that was currently resting in his arms. Gohan had become tuckered out about twenty minutes into their flight and Chichi, wanting to ask Kayos about his flying methods, had passed the boy over to him before he could protest.

‘Weak little runt,’ he thought to himself, ignoring the fact that he brought the child a bit closer to his chest. And he certainly wouldn’t admit how worried he had been when Gohan had been taken. No… he’d never admit that ever. Not in a million years.

Ever.

“Sir, I am receiving a call from Bulma,” Isco stated and Kayos nodded, everyone coming to a stop above the Westland Wastelands so that they could easily hear the message.

“Kayos!” Chiaotzu declared, startling them all that it WASN’T Bulma calling.

“What’s going on?” Kayos asked, confused.

“Bulma and Master Roshi… they’ve been kidnapped.”

“I knew we shouldn’t have left Mutton back there,” Kayos growled in frustration. “Suited guy with glasses?”

That though made Chiaotzu blink. “What? No.”

“Then who was it?”

“A moment, sir,” Isco said. “I’m connecting to the island’s security system… when were they taken?”

“About an hour ago,” Chiaotzu said. “Tien is searching the island and Goku is rather upset.”

“We’ll be there soon,” Chichi assured the small fighter. “Just keep Goku from doing something stupid.”

Isco hung up before turning to me. “I have the kidnappers, sir. They were not Agent Mutton.”

“Then who were they?”Kayos asked and Isco projected out a new image.

It was of a greenish creature, maybe 3 to 4 feet tall, with insect-like features. Two sharp toes, 3 talon-like fingers, wrinkly head, mouth covered in an organic mask, and gleaming red eyes like orbs.

“Bio-Men,” Kayos whispered.

“Bio… you know these creatures?” Chichi asked.

“I do. They are the disposable warrior of Dr. Wheelo.” Kayos frowned. “But… he shouldn’t be free. His lab should be encased in ice…” He looked at Piccolo. “Are you able to contact Kami? I need to ask him something.”

‘I am here, Kayos,’ They all heard the elderly voice say in their heads. ‘I was preparing to send word to you… but I fear you have already learned of it.’

“Kami,”Kayos said out loud, “are the Dragon Balls active?”

“That’s impossible!” Piccolo declared. “They need a year to charge!”

‘Normally that is correct,’ Kami said. ‘But we are going through a rare, once in a Thousand Years event: The Dragon Moon.’

“The… Dragon Moon?” Chichi asked.

‘Yes,’ Kami replied. ‘A Dragon Moon lasts roughly 6 months and during that time the Dragon Balls only need 1 day to recharge. But… every time they are used their final recharge after the end of the Dragon Moon increases by a year.’

“So if they are used 6 times… it will take 6 YEARS for them to recharge?!?” Piccolo declared in shock.

‘Yes… and I am afraid that the Dragon Balls… have been used this morning.’

“…fuck,” Kayos muttered.

NEXT TIME

THE WORLD’S STRONGEST

Chapter Text

“I don’t understand how they were able to use the Dragon Balls,” Tien said with a shake of his head. “Its far too early for them to be activated.”

I frowned as I paced through the main gathering area of our island… hideout? Base? Headquarters? … needing to keep on the move. It was a way I dealt with stress. Which considering that I had just gotten back from saving two kidnapped people only to learn that two more people had been kidnapped? Yeah… just a TOUCH stressed.

Piccolo pressing his mouth into a thin line. “According to Kami a rare mystical event has taken place. The Dragon Moon.”

Baba nodded her head. “Yes… yes I thought that Mars looked especially bright last night.” She had been unusually… calm… ever since Roshi had been kidnapped. Oh, she’d grumped and complained that he was a fool for letting himself get nabbed but we could all tell the old witch was concerned about Roshi. Probably because someone else was tormenting him but still…

“So what is this Dragon Moon anyway?” Goku asked. He was seated on the couch, cuddling with Chichi and Gohan; honestly it was rather sweet, as we’d been forced to let him know about Agent Mutton and the moment we’d landed he’d begun to check them over, making sure they were okay. It amazed me to see that side of Goku but apparently Chichi and him spending more time together was bringing out his protective side. In the anime he was use to basically living his own life outside of her’s, going off the work and train, but now that they were sharing their lives he was… well… a bit clingy. But in a good way.

Piccolo was the one that spoke up. “Apparently a Dragon Moon allows the Dragon Balls to recharge in a single day, rather than a whole year.”

“That’s great!” Chiaotzu proclaimed excitedly. “We could make a ton of wishes to help us out against the Saiyans!”

“Except,” Piccolo continued, “every time a wish is made it will take the dragon balls another year to recharge after the moon ends.”

“Wha… what?” Chiaotzu said in a soft voice, eyes wide.

“So you mean that if anyone makes more than one wish we could go years without the Dragon Balls?” Tien exclaimed in shock.

“Exactly,” I commented, glad they were seeing the problem with the Dragon Moon. Every wish meant a delay in bringing back everyone that died in a conflict… and we had Raditz headed our way. Even if he didn’t go full Nappa on us and destroy a city there were going to be bodies. “And I have a bad feeling that one wish has already been made.”

“What makes you say that?” Goku asked.

“The Bio-Men,” I stated. “They are the creation of a scientist, Dr. Wheelo. He disappeared 50 years ago… rumor state that the earth itself sought to stop him from his attempts to rule over all, so his entire lab was encased in ice, trapping him and his creations forever in the arctic. Maybe he dug his way out…”

“Or he got someone to make a wish,” Tien muttered. “Which means even if we secure the Dragon Balls we are looking at two years before they recharge, once the Dragon Moon is done.”

Chichi sat up, though it was a touch hard with Goku holding her so close to him. “Then we need to find those Dragon Balls before someone else manages to make another wish!”

“And we need to get Bulma and Master Roshi back!” Goku proclaimed before looking at me. “So Kayos, when are we going?”

“Soon,” I informed him, not surprised at all that Goku had already pegged me as going with him. While the others were great fighters they tended to fall back into support roles while me and my (sometimes very stupid) mouth tended to get people to see me as the leader. “Though I think now we need to talk about teams.”

“Teams?” Tien asked.

“We have two major issues and neither of them can wait. Some of us need to deal with Wheelo and get back our people.” That got nods from everyone. “But Chichi is right that we need the Dragon Balls. We can’t leave them floating around… who knows what tinhat despot is going to get a hold of them and make life harder on us. Wheelo is only a problem because they activated… the same will be true with the next person that gets the Dragon Balls. We need them here and locked up nice and tight. So that means splitting up.”

“I’m going after Roshi and Bulma,” Goku said firmly. “Piccolo, you want to come?”

But the green man shook his head. “I’ll go after the Dragon Balls. If his lab is in the arctic I might have trouble there…”

I nodded; while Piccolo would eventually be able to fight in cold weather perfectly fine right now that probably was his biggest weakness due to his body make up. Namek, as I remembered from the show, was pretty warm. Add in that Piccolo was probably made up of more water than the rest of us AND had to have more elastic skin to be able to stretch and grow, and the arctic wasn’t a good play for him to be fighting. “I’m going with Goku. Magic might help make things easier on our end and worst case he may be able to detect ki but I doubt he can detect magic.” Baba nodded at that, a pleased little smile on her face; of course I also had a sudden vision of her selling t-shirts and bobble heads all designed to look like me so she could brag about being my teacher while making some zeni on the side.

“Chiaotzu and I will assist with the dragon balls,” Tien said.

“And I will stay here with Gohan,” Chichi said, hugging her son close.

“As will I,” Baba said. “Someone is going to mess up so I need to be here to-“

“Alert the others?” Chiatozu reasoned.

“Laugh at their misfortune!” Baba taunted.

Goku frowned. “Huh… just the two of us. I mean sure, that can work, but I would have preferred if we had one more person.”

“Don’t let Isco hear you say that,” I commented.

That made Goku swallow. Isco had proven… inventive… when it came to getting revenge on people that dismissed him…

~Three Weeks Earlier~

“Hey guys!” Goku said as he came into the kitchen after snagging a nap. “How’s it going?”

Tien and I just stared at Goku, his face painted up to look like a Mulan when the Husband Finder got a hold of her.

“…super,” I said slowly.

“That’s offensive!” Chiatozu exclaimed, gesturing at their shared white faces. Goku just blinked, confused.

~MC~MC~MC~

“Well, okay, he’s coming…” Goku said quickly. “But he isn’t a fighter. I would have preferred to have someone else that could help out if Wheelo doesn’t want to give up our friends easily!”

“Then I guess its good I arrived!”

“KRILLIN!” everyone shouted as the bald little monk entered the main gathering area, a smug grin on his face. Goku was the first to get to him, lifting him up and giving him a big hug.

“Hey man, how are you?” Goku said happily. “It feels like forever since we last saw one another! I’ve missed you!

Krillin smiled sheepishly and patted Goku on the arm. “And I missed all of you. It was worth it though as I learned how to do some amazing things…” He trailed off, his face becoming grim. “But I walked in on the last of that… something happened?”

“Master Roshi and Bulma were captured by some guy named Dr. Wheelo,” Goku stated as he set Krillin down. “Kayos and I are going after him to get them back while the others gather the Dragon Balls. There is this Dragnet Moon-“

“Dragon Moon,” Piccolo corrected.

“That means they can be used now but if they are we’ll have to wait even LONGER to use them later!”

“That’s…. basically the situation,” Tien admitted.

I nodded. “We could use your help, if you’re up for it. Goku is a strong fighter and I can pull off some tricks with my magic but having you around would really push things into our favor.”

Chichi though shook her head, letting out a huff. “He’s being modest, Krillin. Kayos has gotten very skilled with his magic.”

“Normally I don’t like my students getting big heads!” Baba complained before giving me a whap on the shin. “But this one here is being so modest its making my stomach curdle! He’ll be able to help my fool of a brother, that’s for sure!”

Goku nodded rapidly. “He’s amazing Krillin! He can pull off all sorts of moves you and I could never dream of!”

I cut in. The monk hated me enough, I didn’t need Krillin thinking I was trying to steal his place in the group. “BUT… Krillin still has more experience than me when it comes to fighting. I’ve only sparred with you guys.”

“Hmmpf,” Baba huffed. “I offered to summon some demons from Hell but you complained!”

“And I always will!” I called out loudly . “So we’d all be better off with him watching Goku’s back.”

“Just in case you decide to side with this Wheelo guy?” Krillin asked, crossing his arms over his chest and closing his eyes. “No way am I letting you be alone with Goku. He’s my best friend-“

“Brother!” Goku chirped; he’d really warmed up to the idea of the Z Fighters as his extended family.

Krillin’s sour mood lessened at that. “-my brother and I’m gonna have his back.”

“Yeah!” Goku said, pumping his fist. “Let’s go!”

And with that he rose in the air, his ki glowing around him before he blasted away from us, rocketing out of the doors, leaving them slamming against the walls.

“…so,” I said, looking at the others, “how long before Goku realizes he has no idea where he’s going?”

Before anyone had a chance to answer Goku suddenly appeared right next to us again. “Heheh, I just remembered I had no idea where to go!”

“You are the salt of the earth, Goku,” I muttered.

“Aw, thanks!” he said with a smile, even Krillin grimacing at him not understanding he was being insulted.

“So,” Krillin said, looking at us, “where do we need to go?”

Piccolo chose that moment to speak up. “Isco is finding out for us.”

“Isco?” Krillin said, crinkling his nose. “How is that flying trash can going to figure out-GAAAAA!” He let out a cry as his body seized up, electricity arcing around him and causing what few hairs he had to stand on end. After a moment the current stopped and Krillin groaned before collapsing onto the ground, revealing Isco who had instead of his normal little arm a cattle prod.

“Then I suppose it is my duty to take you to the dumpster,” Isco stated before wiggling his arm, causing his hand to convert back into, well, a hand. We all looked down at Krillin who had little wisps of smoke drifting up from his body. “Now then, if you are all ready to show me the respect I deserve I can inform you of Master Roshi and Bulma’s whereabouts.”

“You found them?” Tien asked, raising an eyebrow.

“But of course. It was rather child’s play, once I was able to get into Bulma’s systems”

That made Chiaotzu frown. “Why did you need to get into Bulma’s systems?”

“Other than trying to hack into her bank account,” I muttered, shooting a dark look at Isco.

Rather than respond to that he stated, “Bulma is the daughter of the wealthiest man on the planet. Naturally she is at risk of being kidnapped. I assumed either her father or herself were smart enough to embed a GPS tracking chip on her… I was, of course, quite correct, and I now know right where she is. Signal is strong and I can quite easily lead us all to her current location.”

“Good work, buddy,” I said, patting Isco on his shell. “Okay, any other comments or questions before we take off?”

Baba was the only one that spoke. “This will be your first true fight, not counting that secret agent you took on.” I decided not to question how Baba knew about Mutton; some things were better left to the poets to debate. “Do not allow yourself to be timid. Not just for yourself but for that old goat I have to call my brother and the blue haired man-chaser. You get a chance to take down their kidnappers you do it. Hard, fast, brutal. You put them down, Avo Kayos. If only one of you can return home… make it you.”

She paused.

“Also don’t be a fucking dimwit!” she snapped. “You are representing me, after all!”

“Of course,” I said with a slight smile before rising in the air, using my magic to layer myself with forcefields. “Okay Isco… you ready?”

My friend fired up his own anti grav systems. Bulma had recently installed them and now Isco could keep up with Goku going top speed. “I was brought on line ready.”

“Then let’s go!” I declared and with that Goku, Krillin, Isco, and I rocketed out of the research facility, Isco directing us to head north.

~MC~MC~MC~

“What do you mean Bulma has been kidnapped!?!?”

King Kai shrugged. “I mean she’s been kidnapped. Do you have another word for when people are taken against their will on your planet?” He paused. “I’m serious, I don’t keep up with your Earth slang. Its hard enough keeping up with Otherworld slang and jargon. Do the kids still say nibbles?”

Yamcha just shook his head. “I can’t believe this.”

“I know, we used to say nibbles all the time-“

“Not that!” Yamcha said, sitting down on the ground with a huff. “Bulma was kidnapped and I wasn’t there to help her!”

“Yeah… because you’re dead,” King Kai pointed out. “If you were there she’d still be kidnapped but also have a stinky corpse to deal with… though not for long since, hey, kidnapped. In fact she might actually prefer being kidnapped over hanging out with a corpse. I know I would. Not that I’ve done either-“

“I need to help her!” Yamcha declared, getting to his feet. “You need to send me back, King Kai!”

But his instructor merely stared at him. “…you really think I’d be stuck here on the planet if I could just pop on over to Earth whenever I wanted?”

That caused Yamcha to pause. “Uh…”

“Because if I could do that I’d be in Vegas with some chicks on my arms hitting up the buffet! Maybe hit up the slots, perhaps play some Blackjack… you know I’m pretty sure Gregory has some playing cards around here if you want me to deal out a few hands…”

Yamcha shook his head. “King Kai, I need to get back to Earth and help Bulma!”

“Okay, stud, let me lay this out real clear.”

And with that King Kai socked Yamcha in the gut, knocking the wind out of him.

“YOU ARE STILL DEAD!” King Kai roared right in Yamcha’s ear. “You can’t help her if you’re worm food! And the only way you aren’t fertilizer is if your friends wish you back! Which they aren’t going to do until its time!”

Yamcha wheezed. “But… Bulma-“

“Will at worst end up in with King Yemma and have ta wait a few months before she gets brought back too!” King Kai complained.

“…you’re right, King Kai,” Yamcha said slowly.

“Of course I am!” King Kai declared. “I’m always right.”

“I have to trust in my friends to get Bulma back. It might kill me-“

“Except it can’t.”

“-that I can’t help her but that is just the way things are.” He rubbed his stomach and nodded. “Let’s get back to training!”

“…or we could play blackjack?” But Yamcha merely shook his head and King Kai sighed.

~MC~MC~MC~

Bulma swallowed as she looked around the dark room she’d awoken in. The last thing she remembered were the strange, bug-like creatures that appeared from the bushes… and then nothing.

And now she was in a dark place, a single spotlight shining down from somewhere high above her, illuminating the small spot on the ground where she was standing and little else. A pair of metal bands were coming out of the ground and locked around her wrists, allowing her some range of motion but otherwise keeping her from truly moving about.

“What is going on?” she called out. Normally she would have tried to figure things out on her own, staying quiet and just observing, but with the way everything was lit that was impossible. Her only hope was to try and get someone to talk to her. “Where am I?”

“Let’s start with the last first, shall we?” a wizen voice said. Bulma turned and saw an old man leaning on a cane approaching her from the darkness. It was as if the shadows themselves wanted nothing to do with him, pulling away as quickly as they could. He had a mishappened head and most of his teeth were gone, giving his already sinister looking smile even more bone-chilling qualities. He was wearing rather non-descript clothing, save for his lab coat, but in Bulma’s mind that made him all the worse. It was one thing for a person to be dressed in armor or a spiky outfit… but to be so normal in their wear? That spoke of something… wrong… about their entire being. “You are in the fortress laboratory of Dr. Wheelo, the greatest scientist of his generation!”

‘I never heard of him,’ Bulma thought, forcing herself not to say those words aloud; she had a feeling they wouldn’t go over with the man before her, as he seemed to respect and care for ‘Dr. Wheelo’ very much. ‘I’ve made sure to study up on every scientist that even caused a smidge of change in history. But Wheelo? Never heard of him. Was he really so great but something happened to hide his work? Or is it merely misplaced loyalty… or ego?’

If the old man was bothered by her lack of comment he didn’t show it, instead merely continuing on. “It is here that he created advancements that would have revolutionized the world… if they had only listened to him!” The old man griped his cane tightly in his gnarled hands. “Fools, all of them!”

“Who, exactly?” Bulma asked, making sure to put just a bit of tremble in her words to make him think she was more frightened than she was. Oh, she was worried to be sure… but she wasn’t exactly the helpless damsel the old man might have believed. They hadn’t removed any of her clothing so she had more protection than they realized and while Goku or Chichi or even Tien wouldn’t have thought about the GPS tracker she’d had inserted in her side she knew Kayos and Isco would at minimum contact her dad, if not think of such a thing themselves.

“The leaders of the world!” the old man snapped, spitting the words out with venom. “They were gathered to be informed of his breakthroughs… but many refused to even come, let alone consider his findings! They refused to understand his genius! No… to recognize it! They had no hope of understanding his brilliance! They should have seen that as sign that his luminous mind was the only one that could guide them through the darkness that is the world that their stupidity created and lead them into a glorious new age!” The man cackled as he thrust his hands skyward.

Bulma swallowed. ‘So he’s completely cracked,’ she thought to herself. Once more the urge to say just that bubbled up within her and perhaps, only a year or two ago, she would have done just that. But being with the gang again and working to prepare for Raditz had done what so many thought was impossible and instilled in her the willpower to hold her tongue.

So instead she stated, “You know a lot about Dr. Wheelo. Who are YOU exactly?”

“Me?” the old man said and to her relief he didn’t seem offended that she didn’t know who he was on sight alone. “I am his loyal assistant, Dr. Kochin. It was I that helped Dr. Wheelo with so many of his experiments… and who will now help him achieve his greatest desire. Speaking of which…” He walked into the darkness only for the light above Bulma to suddenly flare out brighter, causing her to blink her eyes and shield her face. When she was able to see again she realized that Kochin had turned on the lights, allowing her a better view of where she had been taken.

Perhaps it could be called a lab… if one were generous. Instead to Bulma’s eyes it looked like some great sea creature had been twisted inside out and then turned into mad scientist’s lair. Or that they had been swallowed by a massive leviathan and now had to make their home in its belly. There were computers humming along, a few tables with different test tubes and beakers, a large dome with a massive animal brain inside of it, and a giant computer with diamond-shaped screen next to a terminal. But the walls were far more biological than metal. Dark gray in color and layered upon themselves like the folds of a brain. There was an unevenness to it all, with no symmetry to be found anywhere. Nothing truly smooth or flat save for the tables and the monitor and even then they looked slightly off, like a picture that had been bumped and left crooked in a hall.

Bulma’s father had taught her that where a scientist worked reflected their minds. The order, the chaos, the cleanliness and the disorganized messes. All of this allowed someone, if they knew how to look, to understand just what the person was like in life.

Looking about the fortress laboratory of Dr. Wheelo Bulma could only conclude… the man was utterly mad.

“Now then… with you awake we can begin. It is so nice to have an audience.” Kochin tapped his cane against the ground three times even as he touched several keys on the control panel he’d come to a stop at and Bulma’s mouth opened in surprise as the giant view screen turned on to reveal Master Roshi, looking about a strange room that was at least 40 feet tall and twice as wide and long. The floor was white tile but after that was a ring of red light that revealed towers bursting from the ground like demented diseased mushrooms and then darkness that barely allowed her to see thorny walls of the room. It made Bulma think of a Venus fly trap or some other carnivorous plant and she shuddered at the sight of it. “It is well known that Master Roshi is the most powerful martial artist the world has seen. Of course… we do need to determine if that is actually the case or merely the gibbering of overly-dramatic fans! Thus… an examination!”

Kochin slammed his fist down on a large red button and Roshi turned as alarms began to go off in the room he was in.

“Ooooh, I do not like the sound of that,” the old man said, sniffing slightly. The screen began to split up, allowing Bulma to see him standing in the middle of the room… and the creatures that were slowly making their way out of the darkness towards him from different directions.

The first and smallest of the bipedal creatures was green in color, looking rather like an artist had tried to make a dinosaur appear as human as possible. He had a long dorsal fin on his back and stubby horns littered his head instead of hair. The eyes though… the eyes were vacant and void of any thought, like a doll’s eyes. Glassy. Blank.

The next was probably the most human of the three but that wasn’t saying much. He had pink skin like a child had gone crazy with a highlighter and strawberry red hair that was pulled back in a ponytail that only made his elongated head seem all the taller. Like the first he wore body armor… and just like the first while he was smirking the eyes of the pink creature were utterly devoid of thought.

The final one was the most monstrous in Bulma’s opinion. Nearly as wide as he was tall his skin was an orangish yellow with warty growths all along it and great folds of skin that flowed over one another so that even with his great bulk it appeared he had once been far fatter and now was dealing with overstretched skin. His hands ended in three talon-like claws and if there was any hope of finding intelligence in his mind that was quickly dashed by Bulma gazing upon his milky eyes.

“These are the greatest creations of Dr. Wheelo!” Kochin declared. “The Bio-Men that brought you here were merely the first of his artificially created beings. The prototypes for his process to create the ultimate servants! They are able to perform the limited tasks we give them…”

And they had. The damn things had surprised Bulma and Roshi, managing to attack them and inject them with sedatives before either of them had been able to cry out or mount an attack. She only had the barest memory of green skin and inhuman features before she’d awoken in the dark.

“The Bio-Warriors, on the other hand, are the very last. The pinnacle of his expertise in the study of mechanics, biology, and the fusion of the two. But… we have always wondered… could they stand up to the great Master Roshi… the world’s strongest man?”

Kochin paused.

“Kill him.”

~MC~MC~MC~

Roshi frowned as the three warriors moved towards him but otherwise did nothing as they approached. It wasn’t disinterest that kept him inactive, however… in fact it was quite the opposite.

Many who only met him once or twice believed that Master Roshi’s best days were behind him. That he was just a silly old man at best or a demented pervert at worse. That he coasted by on his legacy, using the fame of his past deeds to get away with being a lecherous old man who could no longer throw a punch.

And while it was true that his body wasn’t quite what it had once been… and that before Goku and Krillin had come into his life he had come to agree with people that his days as a fighter and teacher were over… that was no longer the case. Now? Roshi was a fighter again, feeling better than he had in ages. He merely let people continue to believe that he was weak. Because caring about panties and drinking beer didn’t mean that Roshi was slow or thick.

Quite the contrary… he’d just learned to hide it better.

‘All three are gonna pose a problem,’ Roshi thought to himself, using his glasses to hide the fact that he was scanning each one of the strange warriors. ‘Can’t sense their power levels… that’s how them Bio-Men were able ta get a drop on Bulma and me. Don’t think they are magic…’ Spending time with Baba and now Kayos had allowed Roshi to get a sense of what magic felt like and he was able to detect it far better than he once had. Not as good as Ki but he COULD detect it. And there was nothing coming off the Bio-Warriors, meaning that the most likely scenario was that they didn’t have magic or ki… they were machines, or close to it, that fought with brutal power. ‘Now… maybe they are just fighters but I doubt that. Not with the way these fellas look. Them Bio-Men were all uniform and these Bio-Warriors would be as well if they could all do the same things. So… they must each of somethin’ special about them. Only question is what…’ He gave a sniff, bending his knees slightly. ‘Well… guess we’re gonna find out.’

At once the green one fired off whips that crackled with electricity, sending them right at Roshi who nimbly dodged out of the way. Even though he was wearing his favorite beachwear (sandals, a tank top, shorts with little orange and pink flowers on them, and a wide brim hat) he could still move quick in them. Better than wearing his three piece suit that he sometimes liked to don when he decided to go to the mainland in order to barhop. He leapt in the air, dodging the whips, just in time for the pink Bio-Warrior to suddenly rush him, a feeling of utter cold sweeping through the air. Roshi twisted to avoid the brute’s punch and landed on the ground, looking like he hadn’t ever left it, the Bio-Warriors staring at him, trying to process what had just happened.

‘So electric whips and the ability to generate extreme cold,’ he thought to himself. ‘Those are both interestin’. Now then… what about the big-‘

The large yellow Bio-Warrior attacked.

Roshi’s eyes widened at the creatures raw speed. Something that large shouldn’t be able to bounce about as quickly as the Bio-Warrior was and yet Roshi still found himself struggling to avoid its blows. He didn’t run but rather leapt about the battlefield, bounding towards Roshi before swinging at him with his clawed hands. The punches weren’t just fast… it was the fact that due to its size it was like it was a warrior three times smaller moving ten times as fast! It’s reach was far greater than a normal fighter, meaning that the Bio-Warrior was able to reach around him and attack from the sides rather easily. If not for its ample belly it could have easily wrapped him up and attacked from all sides; even with that strategy lost to it Roshi still felt like he was fighting three men.

‘Its faster than it should be… and it don’t seem to have the weight it should either… I wonder…’ With careful consideration Roshi waited for the right moment and then moved to perform a reversal kick. It was a standard move that he’d shown all his students: a kick that was less about hurting your foe as allowing you to push yourself away from a dangerous situation. A bit of strength in the hit but more in the push back that sent you hurtling away. It would startle your opponent and allow you to get back and begin going with ranged attacks. He’d performed it a thousand times.

So he was utterly startled when he found himself suddenly rocketed away from the warrior, slamming into one of the mushroom pillars with a crack.

“Come now!” the man, Kochin, declared with a cackle over the intercom. “Is that truly the best you can do? And here I thought you were so powerful! Are you going to allow a single strike to leave you on the ground?”

The Bio-Warriors began to approach Roshi, smirks on their faces but otherwise not reacting at all.

Roshi… chuckled.

“Heheheheh!” he said as he got up and rolled his shoulders. “I think that popped the kink out of my back! Thanks for that!” He cracked his neck, considering the three warriors as they continued to come towards him. ‘So, the big one has elastic skin… allows him ta take blows that normally would kill’em without breaking a sweat. A powerful skill ta have… if he weren’t surrounded by them there other two!’ He smirked. ‘Yeah… I can work with this.’

Roshi suddenly lashed out, flexing his toes so that the sandal on his right foot flew off and struck the green one right in the face. He howled in frustration but Roshi already had switched to the other foot, the pink one bracing for that… only for Roshi to send his other piece of footwear just past his head, close enough to startle but not enough to hit. Just wisp past his head and make the hairs on his neck move. Distracting but not an actual hit. But that was what he wanted.

Taking a breath he allowed his ki to flow into his body, increasing his muscle mass back to what it had been at his peak. Gripping his walking stick now as a battle staff he twirled it before rushing in, punching the green Bio-Warrior in the face just as he got done cradling his bruised nose and sending him flying back before he was on the pink one, sending a flurry of kicked and punches at him that forced the Bio-Warrior to defend. He didn’t let the pink one have a moment to actually think about using his powers; he’d found that those that gained such attacks tended to forget they existed if they weren’t given the time to think. It was clear from Kochin’s comments that these creatures had been given their abilities and while hardwired into them they weren’t NATURAL. No… the natural reaction was to block and dodge; cold punches required thought that Roshi wasn’t giving the Bio-Warrior the time to have. Roshi pressed the attack on his right side, quickly forcing them Bio-Warrior to rotate with him…

He let up on his strikes, slowing them down, giving the Bio-Warrior time to breathe

Roshi saw the moment the creature thought it had him and easily ducked down as he reached out, fingers spread out as he fired a blast of super chilled air right where he had been.

And… where the yellow Bio-Warrior was now.

The massive creature let out a cry as its skin was flashfreezed and Roshi acted instantly, slamming his staff against the side of the pink one’s head, making it lurch and moan, before spinning on his heels and driving his fist into the frozen flesh and shattering it like it was a poorly made lollipop. The yellow Bio-Warrior let out a scream and Roshi found himself pushed back as, like a balloon, the creature deflated, letting out gurgling death rattles as it collapsed in a heap.

“That’s one,” Roshi said with a smirk before looking at the pink Bio-Warrior. “Don’t think your creator is gonna be happy with ya for that!”

The Pink Bio-Warrior let out a snarl and lunged at Roshi, who merely smirked and leapt out of the way… just as the green one, who had been powering up a whip, struck out with its own attack. At once the Pink one seized up, trembling and shaking, and Roshi used that distraction to grab the yellow one’s hide. It was surprisingly light for such a large thing and Roshi was thankful for that, leaping at the green Bio-Warrior and throwing it over him, leaving him covered from head to toe save for the whip. It was like he’d been caught inside a parachute, his body thrashing about wildly, trying to figure out what had happened. He knew it wouldn’t last, as the skin wasn’t a prison at all and the green one would be able to get out soon enough. But that didn’t matter as, with it blinded and unable to shock him due to the rubber skin that covered its form insolating its powers, Roshi was able to go all out, punched and kicking the bundle with all his might until there was a vicious crack. The body crumpled and Roshi turned to see the Pink Bio-Warrior moaning before it fell to the ground, either knocked out or dead.

He walked over and drove his fist into its face for good measure.

“Well… they weren’t all that impressive,” he said with a smirk, powering down. He stood up and cracked his back before he went to retrieve his sandals.

“Wonderful!” Kochin declared over the intercom system. “Wonderful! You truly are the world’s strongest man! One normally is upset when their creations fall but in this case they were always doomed… a means to ensure that you were perfect for what we desired.”

“Oh?” Roshi asked, quirking an eyebrow. “And what is it you desire?”

“Not him…” a new voice declared sinisterly. “Me.”

And with that the mushroom pillars around him suddenly opened up and began to unleash clouds of purple gas into the air.

“Oh that can’t be good,” Roshi muttered, backing away.

Chapter Text

Bulma watchedin a panic as the purple gas began to lazily approach Roshi, who was looking about trying to figure some way out of the mess. “What is that?” she demanded. “He did what you wanted and now you’re going to kill him?”

“Oh no, my dear,” the new voice that had spoken moments ago stated, chuckling slightly. It seemed to come from everywhere, with each word vibrating Bulma’s very being. “The very last thing I want to do is kill him. I am in need of that body and harming it would ruin all my preparations.”

“What… who is talking?”

“Me,” the voice said and suddenly lights began to glow on the wall to her left, Bulma turning…

…and staring at the massive brain that floated in the sealing dome in the wall.

“Oh my god,” she whispered.

“No, not god. I’m not that arrogant,” the voice said. “Just the rightful ruler of this world. Of course, as you can see, I have suffered greatly because of the powers of this planet refusing to acknowledge my greatness. Which is where Master Roshi came in.” Bulma turned, seeing the old man looking about wildly, head twisting about as the gases got close. “Half a century ago I presented to the close minded fools of this world my plans to bring us to a new golden age. With the aid of my Bio-Men and Bio-Warriors we would be able to craft a society where people wanted for nothing. They would be mindless, obedient drones, doing all that we commanded. Wars would be fought with not a single human being killed but rather through gladiator bouts where the greatest of the Bio-Warriors would determine what was right and wrong. Crime would disappear as the Bio-Men patrolled the streets. And why would one want to break the law when everything was given to you?

“But those short-sighted fools only saw the negatives. Yes… it takes 30 humans to gather the organs and body parts needed to create a single Bio-Man… and to create a Bio-Warrior takes 100 that amount! But this planet is overpopulated as it is… eliminating 90% of those that waste their lives on it would be nothing in the grand scheme of things! But they didn’t care! They called me mad and a fool! So… I decided that I would do it myself. I would make the world the shining beacon I knew it could be.

“Only… even the Earth rebelled against me. The ice storm suddenly came upon this laboratory on the eve of my great experiment, trapping me inside. I would have died had Kochin not removed my brain. For the last 50 years I have worked to perfect my methods, to create even more powerful Bio-Warriors… and the entire time I have let my knowledge swell! Tapping into pieces of my mind that you could not even fathom!”

“So what?” Bulma said, glaring at the brain. “You think that by… defeating Roshi you can prove you were right?”

“Oh no no no… Roshi was always meant to win. My Bio-Warriors were merely a test to ensure that he remained the world’s strongest man. You see… I have come to realize that power only respects power. And that power… must be total. I can not hope to rule this world if I am merely a genius… I must have a body to match.”

On the screen the gases crept closer.

“I will take Roshi’s body and alter it with my Bio-Warrior process. Turning it into the ultimate vessel to place my brain inside. Then I shall stake my claim upon this world and do what I should have 50 years ago: bring about my glorious-!”

The fortress trembled and Bulma turned towards the screen to see that a hole had been blasted into the room Roshi was in… and Goku, Krillin, and Kayos were flying in.

“Who are they?!?” Wheelo demanded. His earlier confident, collected nature had disappeared in a flash in the face of the new arrivals, leaving his voice snarling all around Bulma.

While Wheelo wasn’t happy Bulma was quite pleased now that things had truly shifted to her side and thus allowed herself a chance to be arrogant. “Oh, them? Just Master Roshi’s students, Goku and Krillin.” She looked right at the brain and said, “who are stronger than him.”

But rather than be startled Dr. Wheelo instead grew angry.

Angry… but not at her.

“Kochin,” he said in a low voice, “what does she mean that those two are stronger that Roshi?”

“Well… I don’t-“

“Did you or did you not tell me that Roshi was the world’s strongest man?”

Kochin shifted. “You see sir I did research it-“

“50 years ago?” Bulma asked with a dark smirk. “You realize how far the world has evolved and changed in fifty years? The entire world changes in 50 years! We’ve learned so much! Advanced so much! And you based your entire plan on 50 years worth of outdated knowledge?!?”

Bubbles drifted up from Wheelo’s brain dome.

“Kochin,” he said darkly, “who is the world’s strongest man?”

The old man glanced at the screen. “I… suppose that in the time since we last began to this plan… it is possible that those two men have managed to surpass Roshi.” He looked back at Wheelo and grinned. “But that merely means that you will have an even STRONGER body to use!” He tapped some buttons on the keyboard. “Let us start with some Death Spheres… as a warm up!”

~MC~MC~MC~

“Mr. Piccolo?”

Setting the three Dragon Balls he’d collected down Piccolo took a calming breath. He managed to get his task done easily enough and would have gone after the fourth one… expect Tien and Chiaotzu had called him to inform him that it was closer to their current location so even though they were currently still going after the third it would still end up quicker for them to retrieve the last Dragon Ball rather than Piccolo wasting his time trying to nab it.

‘Which is fine… except now I have to play nursemaid to the runt,’ he thought to himself as he turned and looked at Gohan who was shifting nervously from foot to foot, head bowed just as Piccolo supposed his mother had taught him. That was at least a relief… Gohan wasn’t at all like all the other children that he’d seen during his years. He could be a bit of a crybaby at times and far too emotional to be sure but he was polite and he didn’t scream and throw tantrums and demand everyone pay attention to him.

So Piccolo sighed and said, “If this is about your dad I’m sure he’s fine. Krillin definitely has gotten stronger since we last saw him.”

And wasn’t that a pill to swallow?

‘Before he went on that little trip he would have had no hope in trying to match me in strength,’ Piccolo thought to himself bitterly. ‘Now, even with him suppressing his energy… I know he’s closed the gap.’ Piccolo was still stronger than the little bald monk but it wouldn’t be the utter decimation that it once would have been. No… Krillin would still lose but not as quickly and as cleanly as Piccolo would have preferred. ‘Goku and I are pushing ourselves harder but… we need to get better, faster. The others are getting not just stronger but smarter as well.’

Tien with his new abilities to work with Chiaotzu, allowing them to swap moves and skills and energy almost instantly. Krillin and his new energy conserving style. Even Kayos with his magic. All of them were learning NEW ways to fight rather than merely refining their skills and Piccolo would NOT be left in the dust-

“Mr. Piccolo?” Gohan said, making Piccolo yank himself from his thoughts. “I didn’t want to talk about my daddy.”

“Hmmmpf. That would be a first for all of you.” He began to walk away from the vault, not bothering to see if the boy would follow. ‘If his question is so important then he’ll chase after me.’

And sure enough… he did.

“I was just wondering… my mom and dad say that you wanted to take over the world.”

“Why the past tense?” Piccolo asked. “I still want to take over it.”

“…why?”

‘So, its going to be one of those conversations,’ he thought, mentally rolling his eyes. “Listen kid, if you are trying to talk me out of it or appeal to my better nature then just forget about it. The world belong to me, its just that you stupid humans haven’t realized it yet. I am going to rule and that’s that.”

“But… why?”

Piccolo frowned. “I just told you why.”

“No,” Gohan said, shaking his head. “You told me that you want to rule the world. But why would you? Who would want to rule the Earth?”

It was the… disgust… in his voice that made Piccolo pause.

“What do you mean?” he said slowly, wondering just what the kid was getting at. He stopped walking and turned, looking down at Gohan with a critical gaze.

“I wouldn’t want to rule the world,” Gohan stated with a shrug, causing his shield to bounce a bit. “There are so many people… they can’t agree on ANYTHING! They fight about religion and government and what toppings to have on a pizza! And they aren’t all going to accept you, even if you show that you are the best for the job! People fight because they like to fight! And not like how you or my daddy fight… they like to fight because they’re bored or they just want to cause problems. You’d spend all your time dealing with people trying to make you stop ruling the world.”

Piccolo blinked at that. The kid… made a good point. Hadn’t that been the downfall of his own father? Hadn’t he been forced to focus so much of his time and energy on making sure he kept the throne once he’d gotten it? Sending out ‘children’ to deal with Goku and his pals, to make sure they didn’t interfere?

“And you’d be so focused on that you couldn’t do anything fun anymore!” Gohan complained. “Mommy and I have been covering world history and all the emperors and kings… they have to do boring things like sit around and plan for wars or rule on disputes or make up new laws and then GET everyone to obey the new ones instead of the old ones! They don’t get to train or read books or watch movies…”

He didn’t know about the last two but… once more Gohan was making a good point. Piccolo could see it in his head: him sitting on a throne, ready to enjoy the thrill of being ruler of the Earth… only for people to come in to let him knew this group wanted him to settle zoning laws and another one was complaining about the punishment for jaywalkers. A thousand little petty complaints, swallowing him up like a whirlpool, dragging him down into the drudgery of having to rule.

“I guess if you have a good reason then that’s okay but… I wouldn’t ever want to rule the world. Its boring. I’d rather just be so strong I could do what I wanted!”

Piccolo considered Gohan for a long time.

“Mr. Piccolo?”

He reached down… and patted the little boy on the shoulder.

“You’re a good kid, Gohan,” he said simply before walking off.

~MC~MC~MC~

“You okay, Master Roshi?” Goku said, hurrying over to his teacher. We had been forced to blast our way into the fortress, Goku using Ki and me tearing at the walls with magic in order to finally get inside. Krillin had watched our backs to make sure that Wheelo wasn’t planning to try and ambush us but it had quickly become clear that the man really didn’t care if we got in.

‘Considering canon… that is worrying,’ I thought.

“Ya think some test-tube grown fighters could defeat me?” Roshi asked with a sniff, powering down. “That’s the thing about all these power hungry fools… think you can just jump from step one to one hundred! A warrior who hasn’t trained so they understand how to truly use their powers will never be a match for a skilled fighter!”

I smirked. “And it helps that you have been working out again and boosted your power level?”

“Well… yes, there is that,” Roshi admitted. “Though… looking at them gases they are still trying to pump in maybe we should move this along, boys?”

I wasn’t for sure what the clouds of purple gas would do to us but I decided I really didn’t want to find out. “Agreeing with Roshi. Let’s get the hell out here!”

Goku nodded and fired off a ki blast that destroyed a wall, the four of us racing through the hole and into another room. “We need to find Bulma.”

“And then deal with the guys that took her,” Krillin stated. “No good if we have them coming after us again, especially if we are dealing with Raditz!”

“So Krillin,” Roshi said as we hurried through the next room, which looked like an inverted golf ball, “you learn what you needed to learn?”

“Oh yeah!” Krillin proclaimed, excited. “I-“

Suddenly the textured surface of the walls around us flickered before turning a steely gray-black… and released hundreds of large orbs, each about the size of a beanbag chair. The slowly pushed away from the wall before blades snapped out of them, the balls beginning to rotate faster and faster until they became whirling death orbs.

“Yaaaaay,” I said sarcastically as I fell into a fighting stance.

“Don’t worry guys,” Krillin said, stepping forward and cracking his knuckles, “I got this.”

His aura flared… but not like it used to.

Rather than a crackling violent flame Krillin’s ki aura just made his skin glow, so he began to shine like a deep sea angler fish. Flicking out his fingers we all watched as the light grew in intensity when it came to the lightshow, only for the ki to pull away from him into small, inch long circles.

“Destructo Discs!” Krillin called out, throwing out one hand and then the other. The discs raced out and TORE through the whirling orbs, easily cutting through them as Krillin began to send more and more out.

“Amazing!” Roshi exclaimed. “He’s barely using any ki but what he does is so concentrated that it is able to tear through those traps like butter!”

“Its not the size,” Krillin stated, “its how you use it! I’ll never have as much strength as Goku… but I can make what I do have go the distance. Stretch out every tiny bit!”

“That’s amazing, Krillin!” Goku cheered. “Man, I can’t wait to have a sparring match with you to see how I measure up now.”

“Only can have that when we get to Bulma,” I said before touching the comm. unit in my ear. “Isco?”

“I nearly have full control, sir,” the droid stated. “I am shutting down the traps and setting up a lightening system to guide you to Bulma. I can’t access that section of the fortress yet so I’m afraid you will have to fight on your own there but… hmm… one moment sir… I might be able to make a splash myself.”

He cut off and I shrugged.

“Well, he says we can make our way to the lab.”

“Let’s go then!” Goku said and with that he began to sprint off.

Krillin frowned. “He forgot he didn’t know which way to go, didn’t he?”

“I’ve noticed he does that a lot,” I muttered.

“Probably because you-“

“Used my magic to do something evil,” I finished for him, rolling my eyes as I moved towards the blinking lights above the doorway that had just opened up. “Yeah yeah yeah. Now come on!” I began to jog towards the door, the others following after. “Goku will catch up in a minute, let’s get to Bulma!”

“What do you wager we rescue her, return home,” Isco said, “and manage to defeat Raditz before Goku returns?”

“Hey!” Krillin exclaimed. “Goku would never-“

“50 zeni!” Roshi exclaimed.

Krillin shot the old man a look.

“What? Sometimes ya have to take a gamble!”

~MC~MC~MC~

Krillin frowned as he followed after Kayos, who was weaving through the hallways. He didn’t like that he was following the man and not just because he didn’t trust him. Kayos… Kayos was the new guy! And the weakest of the group! What right did he have to be leading them?

‘Okay, admittedly he does have Isco to help us out… without him we’d be bumbling about trying to figure out which direction to go in.’ He frowned, shaking his head in annoyance. ‘But that’s Isco, not Kayos! Maybe he’s learned some new tricks but right now all I see is some glory hound trying to steal all the praise for himself!’

Kayos sped up and Roshi and Krillin were forced to lengthen their strides, something that was hard on Krillin seeing as Kayos was twice his size! But they soon burst into a strange room, a huge monitor screen on the wall (which themselves looked disturbingly fleshy and organic), tables, and-

“Bulma!” Krillin cried out.

“Krillin?” the blue haired woman said in surprise. “What are you doing here? Aren’t you supposed to be training?”

“I’m all done.” Krillin’s eyebrow twitched. “Wait, THAT’S how you greet me after all these months! And when I come to rescue you?!”

“Well, the latter isn’t that big of a deal,” she reasoned.

“Not her first kidnapping,” Kayos pointed out.

“People who were captured by secret agents don’t get to talk!” Bulma snapped at him.

Kayos though smirked. “I wasn’t captured, Chichi and Gohan were. Piccolo and I rescued them.”

“Chichi and Gohan were captured by a secret agent?” Krillin said, confused by that little piece of information.

Roshi chuckled. “Heheh, it was a whole thing! Haven’t gotten the entire story ourselves-“

Lights suddenly swiveled onto the wall… and a massive brain that floated in a dome-like container.

“But… thinkin’ now might not be the best time for that…” Roshi muttered.

“…well, hello Dr. Wheelo,” Kayos said, raising an eyebrow.

“Hmmm… someone knows of me,” a voice that Krillin realized was coming from the MASSIVE BRAIN purred out. “It is good to see that after all this time there are people that know of my genius and skill.”

“Oh yeah, totally,” Kayos said as he began to walk around the lab, idly touching different bits that lay on the tables. A microscope, a beaker… one point he picked up a clipboard and began to leaf through the pages. “Dr. Wheelo, creator of the Bio-Men. Suffering from delusions of mediocrity.”

“I think you mean grandeur,” Bulma stated.

“I know what I said,” Kayos responded as he walked up to her. “Hmm… nice.” He rattled the cables holding her. “Might take Krillin… a microsecond to break these?”

“Nah, shorter than that,” Bulma said before she suddenly lashed out with her foot and Krillin’s eyes went wide when a blade popped out of her shoe, easily severing first one cable and then another. “He wouldn’t need to activate that.”

“You… you always had that?” an old man with hardly any teeth in his mouth said in shock.

“Of course I did!” Bulma stated with a huff as she looked over the cuffs still attached to her wrists. “I could have broken out but I wanted to find out more about you, Kochin. And your boss.” She glanced at the brain.

“Not much to learn?” Kayos asked as he went back to examining things in the lab.

“Not in the slightest. Its sad, really. There is so much to learn from history but Dr. Wheelo’s accomplishments could fit in a thimble.”

“You dare mock my work-“ Wheelo growled only for Kayos to cut him off.

“Mock? How is it mocking when we are merely stating facts! Is it mocking those that remain planted on the earth to say that gravity exists? Mocking a dog for saying it can’t breathe under water? There isn’t mockery here, Wheelo… just the cold, hard, scientific facts.”

“Like,” Bulma said as Kayos disappeared from view, moving behind a large cylinder, “how you might have been a big deal in the past but now? You are so out of date its just pathetic. My dad could probably whip up better warriors than the Bio-Creatures you made.”

“My Bio-Warriors are-“

“Dead,” Bulma said. “Killed by Roshi. Who until a few months ago was retired. And you thought you were going to use them to take out the world’s strongest man? If Krillin or Goku or Tien or Piccolo had been here all of them would have died in seconds!”

“And if that was an example of your genius I’m not sure if I wanted to see how you and the Crypt Keeper over there,” Kayos said, coming around from the other side of the cylinder, “were ever going to hope to take over one of their bodies. On one hand it would be horrifying… not in a disgusting sort of way but kind of like seeing how they make a hot dog. But on the other hand… there is a morbid fascination. Like a monkey being given a hand grenade. You KNOW its going to end badly but-“

“You will pay for your insolence!” Kochin screamed and Krillin watched in shock as the man’s hand blew apart, revealing a Gatling gun. Bullets sprayed from the barrel…

…and Kayos’s form just rippled.

“Ow,” he said as he faded away, much to Krillin’s surprise. He knew of the Afterimage technique but Kayos’ had been talking… another magic trick? Whatever it was the illusion was gone just as darkness ripped through the entire lab, leaving Krillin unable to see his hand even if he pressed it to his face.

“What is-“

“Heh, this is a new move Kayos created,” Roshi said somewhere to his right. “Blacklight. It leaves you trapped in utter darkness. And he’s probably using White Noise to throw any sounds he’s makin’.”

Krillin slowly nodded at that. “That would be useful. And with how low his power levels are…” Mentally he added, ‘and now that I can utterly hide my power levels this would be the perfect move for me to learn… if I can adapt it to use ki…’

“Is this truly the best you can do, Dr. Wheelo?” Kayos taunted, his voice seeming to come from everywhere. “Your pathetic Bio-Men who could do little more than sneak attacks? Your Bio-Warriors that didn’t even make Roshi break a sweat. And now the walking, talking, bawking tin can? Couldn’t even install some teeth in him? He a brain in a jar too?”

“Kochin is one of my greatest creations!” Wheelo snarled. “An automaton that was built to mimic the brain waves of my dead assistant!”

“Then either he is an idiot or you REALLY don’t know how to copy brainwaves because he sucks at research.” They heard snickers and Krillin twisted around in the darkness, trying to figure out where Kayos was, but he couldn’t even see anything. Except for feeling his feet actually touch the ground he might as well have been floating in space! “Of course we can blame that on the creator, can’t we? You were shit at figuring out how to give commands, weren’t you? Story of your life, I suppose.”

“Show yourself you wretched-“

But Kayos continued on. “The world’s strongest man… what is that? What even is that? Just raw strength? Well, I hate to break it to you but you got it wrong there. Roshi isn’t the strongest in terms of raw strength. He uses ki to help amplify his strength… in fact most of the most powerful fighters do. Okay, maybe ki? Piccolo has that in spades… he fought in a damn World Marital Arts Tournament! Same with Goku! But NOOOOOOOOO. Your idiot robot picks Roshi. No offense Roshi but Goku and Piccolo have far more ki than you!”

“Heheh, ain’t gonna deny that.”

“What are you doing?” Krillin whispered.

“Helpin’ Kayos play some mind games with this fella.”

The documentarian continued on. “But strength isn’t everything. Roshi is the greatest tactical mind I’ve ever met. Of course you want to take the best part of him and put your maggot filled brain in his body so I guess he won’t be the strongest anymore. Just the World’s Best At Making Disgusting Looking Monsters.”

Kochin chose that moment to speak up. “You will play for these insults! We will-EERK!”

Suddenly the darkness disappeared and Krillin turned to find Kayos standing behind Kochin… stabbing him in the neck with some strange silver device.

“There you are,” Kayos whispered before leaping back. Kochin turned and aimed his guns at him only to jerk suddenly.

“What… what have you don’t to me?” Kochin said.

Then his head twitched and a different voice came out of his mouth.

“Hmmm… what do we have here?”

“Isco?” Krillin said in surprise.

“Plenty of room. I could actually keep you around… you are hardly using any space.” Kochin’s body twitched again. “But no… I don’t think I want you as a roommate. Deleting Kochin program.”

“NO!” Kochin suddenly screamed before his body went complexly lax. “No….” he whispered, whimpering… and then there was a shrill screeching sound followed by silence.

“What have you done?” Wheelo demanded. “WHAT HAVE YOU DONE?”

“The doctor won’t be seeing any more patients,” Kayos said. “Isco?”

Kochin’s head snapped up and he began to look over his remaining hand. “Hmm… I don’t think this will do at all. I have no desire to have your disgusting flesh on my new form.” He reached up, his gun hand turning back into fingers only they were made of metal, silver and gleaming, and grabbing at his mouth, pulling his lips up and down until he was able to widen his mouth enough to allow his entire head to be yanked down over a faceless robotic head. “Ah,” Isco said as he set about removing the flesh from his other hand. “Much better… though not by much. Horribly outdated. But I suppose Bulma can upgrade this to work as a good secondary body. Allow me to fight without risking myself.” He suddenly spun around and aimed his hands at Wheelo, fingers turning back into Gatling guns. “Now then… I believe this is the part where we send you home to mommy?”

“No… no…. NO!” Wheelo screamed… and the wall around him began to buckle and tremble. “You will not do this to me! You will not ruin my grand design! I will not allow it!”

“What is going on?” Krillin asked, taking a step back.

“I think I taunted him one too many times,” Kayos admitted.

“YOU THINK!?!” Krillin shouted before turning back to see a massive robotic arm burst from the wall. “It’s a machine! A robot!”

“Please,” Isco stated, “It is nothing of the sort! It is a metal suit with a brain in it. Please don’t-“

“Isco, time and place!” Bulma shouted as bits of the lab began raining down on them.

“You will all suffer!” Wheelo roared, now fully enraged. Krillin steeled himself even as he moved to protect Bulma, Kayos holding out his arms and causing black and white… well, Krillin supposed it was magic… burst from his hands, and Roshi puffed himself back up to his muscular form. Wheelo was already partially out of the wall, revealing a body that was humanoid and most bestial. A sloping head with the brain dome on the top which, when combined with the way the structure sat on its ‘shoulders’ made Krillin think less ‘genius’ and more ‘caveman’. The top half seemed far too large and bulky when compared to the bottom that he was ripping from the wall, with spindly legs just visible. A single arm had freed itself, the pincer at the end clanging menacingly as Wheelo smashed against the wall, breaking more of the metal away to free himself. He towered over them, at least 20 feet tall if not bigger, and even with his new technique Krillin felt a shudder of nervousness flow through him. “Each and every one of you will suffer! If I need to stitch you all into one single body using only twine and a needle I will! I SHALL HAVE MY PERFECT BODY! I-“

And that’s when a beam of energy struck Wheelo on the side, causing him to stagger. Because he was still half-connected to the wall it caused his form to spin around, smashing back into the wall he’d been attempting to pull his encased form out of. Cables and wires and sections of the wall came down, tangling around him.

“Hey guys!” Goku said with a grin as he skidded to a stop in front of us. “This place is really big... Lot of traps too!” He frowned when he noticed Isco’s new body. “Hey, who is that?”

“It was one of the guys who kidnapped me,” Bulma stated. “But now its Isco.”

“It’s a version of me,” Isco stated. “Nothing can beat my true perfection… certainly not this.” He wiggled his fingers. “Though I admit that it does have surprisingly fluid motion. That is a lovely addition. I am undecided on the looks of it… perhaps some paint if I keep it? Red and gold?”

“Too Iron Man,” Kayos stated.

“Who?” Roshi asked.

Goku though looked Isco up and down. “Hey, that’s great for you! Now you have a way to train with us!”

“Why am I not surprised?” Isco asked with a light huff.

A groan filled the air though not one that came from any human. Rather it was from metal bending and tearing under great force. We all looked past Goku to see Dr. Wheelo struggling to get out of the wall. But while the large metal exo-body he’d built for his brain was powerful it wasn’t as swift and nimble as a human body and thus he was having trouble extracting himself from the wall. The blast had driven him back into the wall, and into a section clearly not meant to come apart, so he was struggling to get out now that he found himself tangled up in the cables and shredded metal.

“Oh, so another one?” Wheelo said but his tone made it clear that he was clinging to the very fringes of sanity. “Perfect. Perhaps I will put a piece of me in each of you. Create an entire army of myself! Then I will find those you love and-“

Goku’s smile fell and he dropped into a fighter’s mode.

“Oh, you pressed the Chichi Button,” Kayos murmured before Goku leapt forward. But rather than punch at the dome like Krillin expected him to do his friend grabbed a steel beam that had fallen and smashed it against the robot, shattering a red circle that was on the top of it. “Ya shouldn’t have done that!”

“Where are you… where did you go?!?” Wheelo shouted and Krillin realized that Goku had just blinded him, taking out the only way Wheelo had to see.

“Whoa!” Krillin exclaimed as Goku swung with the beam again, cracking it against the robot’s head and denting the metal. “That was… wow.”

“Heh,” Roshi said with a smirk as Goku instantly darted for some cables, snagging them and giving them a yank. Other cables went taunt and Wheelo bellowed out when his arm moved on its own, lifting into the air and becoming ensnared. “We’ve been workin’ on getting Goku back ta using his environment as a weapon. Boy is one of the best fighters when it comes to situational awareness but he needs to relearn a few things.”

“Well,” Goku said, landing next to them and wearing a dark smile, “I am learning quickly. And from the ‘world’s strongest’.”

Wheelo bellowed at that, his body twitching and spasming, causing more of the lab to crumble

“…roll with it!” Kayos snapped before looking at Roshi and Goku. “Fire on me.”

“Wait, what?” Krillin said even as the two powered up some attacks.

“We need to hit him again, blast the bastard good enough to break him,” Kayos stated.

“So why are they blasting you!?!” Krillin demanded.

“For science,” Kayos said with a smirk. “WHITE FLAG!”

Goku and Master Roshi fired, Kayos catching the blasts in his hands, body jerking as he absorbed their ki. Krillin thought for sure that was going to be it for him, the strange man finally having gone nuts and caused his own death, but Kayos instead take a breath and squared his shoulders. After a moment he settled down but ki energy still danced along his arms, twisting and snapping like vipers.

“Alright then!” Roshi shouted, pointing at Isco. “Get Bulma out of her, Isco! We’ll finish this!”

“Come along, Bulma,” Isco stated. “You benefit from my need to survive.” He easily picked her up bridal style and began to run. “Sir… please don’t die, I don’t want to break in another fleshbag.”

“Noted,” Kayos told him as he focused on the gathered ki in his arms.

“On three, Master Roshi?” Goku asked.

“On three.”

There was no need to ask what move they would be using.

Krillin focused, calling upon all the ki he had been preserving. He had a feeling he’d need it for this; they were only going to get one shot at this before Wheelo did enough damage to free himself and even blinded he would be a threat.

“Oh… this is gonna be good,” Kayos purred as all four of them fell into the stance for Roshi’s signature attack. Legs braced, arms held slightly back, hands opened as they channeled their ki.

“Ka…” Roshi said.

“Ma…” Krillin stated.

“Ha…” Goku continued.

“Ma…” Kayos declared.

All four thrust out their arms.

“HA!”

Krillin nearly stopped the attack when he felt the power blast out of his palms. He knew that the Selfless Style allowed him to conserve his ki and that he had been working to build up his strength but… but what he had fired was jaw dropping. It rivaled Goku’s beam in power! But he pressed on and Wheelo, still struggling to free himself could only cry out as his body was smashed by the four energy beams, tearing off great hunks of metal and leaving him flailing about, bashing himself into the wall again and cracking the dome that held his brain. Fires exploded around him as tech caught on fire and fluids began to leak from his robotic form, causing the flames to grow hotter.

“Krillin!” Goku called out. “Destructo Discs!”

“Right!” Krillin declared, throwing out more of the tiny blades, directing them to hack and slash through the now exposed joints of Wheelo’s exosuit form. An arm was completely cleaved off and another disc struck some tubing on his leg, causing Wheelo to suddenly be unable to support himself. He crashed down hard, letting out a scream of fury that ended in a garble of electronic gibberish.

The lab trembled and explosions began to rip through it, making everyone looking about wildly.

“Its coming down!” Roshi declared just as a large chunk of the roof slammed down near them. “We need to get out of here.”

“One second,” Kayos said, grabbing a metal pole. He hurried over to Wheelo’s crumpled form, staring down at the enlarged brain. “Never leave a knife to stab you in the back.”

“WAIT!” Wheelo screamed but it was too late as Kayos drove the pipe through the cracked dome, piercing the mad scientist’s brain. The dome trembled before shattering completely, causing the fluid that had surrounded the brain to gush out onto the floor. Wheelo let out another terrible scream as his remaining arm spasmed and failed but Kayos was already rising in the air, face a cool mask, even as Wheelo’s brain seemed to collapse on itself, unable to support its own weight without the fluids to keep it floating.

“That was for kidnapping my friends,” he growled.

“Let’s go!” Goku shouted, bending down so Roshi could scramble onto his back. Krillin blasted into the air, Goku following while Kayos rose rapidly like he’d been yanked by an invisible force.

It wasn’t a second too soon as suddenly the fortress was engulfed in flames, explosions ripping through the entire structure. The foursome landed about a 100 meters away, Isco (both Iscos, the drone and the robot) waiting there with Bulma who was wearing the lab coat Kochin had worn while possessing the body. They watched as the fortress began to cave in on itself even as smoke billowed out of the shattered roof and fires ran rampant. The shrill sound of metal tearing from their fixtures filled the arctic air though to Krillin it sounded more like the screams of a dying madman.

The ice suddenly began to crack around the fortress and the group quickly backed away as fissures formed, the fortress suddenly shifting so that it was listing to one side as the ground gave way and it began to slowly sink. More snow fell from the mountain above it, pouring down upon the structure and filling it up thanks to the many holes within the roof. Like an old bent back man easing into a bathtub the fortress dropped down lower and lower until, after about 10 minutes, it was completely gone, the snows already melting thanks to the fires. They would quickly solidify though, once more sealing away the remains of the mad man known as Dr. Wheelo.

“And so falls the House of Usher,” Kayos muttered.

“But that was Dr. Wheelo’s place,” Goku said.

“…it’s a quote Goku,” he said.

“From what?”

“The… nevermind.” He turned to Isco. “So… we’re scrubbing that body head to toe?”

“Oh believe me sir, that was never in doubt,” the drone Isco stated. “Bulma and I have already discussed how we are going to upgrade it while we were waiting for you to finish… everything is woefully out of date but the skeleton is there.”

“New processors, new wiring,” Bulma said, ticking off the points. “Its going to be a big deal.”

“But it will allow me to safely join you all in battle while not risking myself… which is the most important thing in the world.”

“You are a heck of a human being, Isco,” Kayos said.

“No need to be insulting, sir.”

“Well, I don’t know about the rest of you but I don’t feel like freezing out here.” Bulma pulled the lab coat tighter around her form. “Please tell me you brought a capsule ship.”

“No but I can keep you warm,” Kayos said, putting his hand on Bulma’s back. She suddenly gasped as they rose up, a shimmer of magic forming around the two. “I won’t be able to fly as fast…”

Isco grabbing his new body and easily lifted it up. “We can’t anyway… I won’t have you damage my greatness.”

Krillin merely shook his head and smirked as the group began to banter.

‘Its good to be back,’ he thought to himself as the gang began to fly away, never once looking back.

~Two Days Later…~

“Well, I suppose I shouldn’t be surprised,” the old man said as he looked over the ruins of Wheelo’s lab. The ice was clear as glass, making it easy to peer down and see within the ruins of the structure. “You always were a vain and foolish man, my old teacher.”

He knelt down onto the ice, adjusting his tall back cap, the symbol of the Red Ribbon Army proudly on display.

“If you are still alive in there… if you can hear me… know that this isn’t a rescue mission. You have information and data I need. Outdated and as I can clearly see here inferior… but it will save me time in the long run.” He scoffed. “That was your mistake, Wheelo… you thought to create new life. I merely seek to take life and… improve upon it.”

But even as he said that Dr. Gero began to wonder… if he might not upstage Wheelo.

Perhaps… it was time to create something new himself…

Chapter Text

Several More Months Later…

Yamcha grimaced as he held his hands out high into the air. His eyes were shut and he was doing his best to push his focus far beyond King Kai’s planet. It was hard, because there was so little beyond the reaches of the tiny little sphere, but he knew that despite appearances King Kai’s planet wasn’t the only thing out there. According to his teacher there were all sorts of other planets out there, filled with all sorts of people. ‘Core People’ as King Kai had called them. Along with other Kais and other beings that King Kai didn’t want to talk about and said that Yamcha didn’t need to know about. But the point was there were people out there.

And he would tap into that.

‘Focus,’ Yamcha thought to himself, doing all he could to clear from his mind all thoughts other than the drive to connect with the energy of the worlds beyond King Kai’s planet and Snake Way. ‘They are out there. You just need to reach out, find their energy, and have them lend you that energy.’ He extended his senses further out, like straining to hear someone talking who was far away except… not like that. ‘Not like that at all,’ he thought before banishing the thought. ‘Focus, Yamcha. Focus. You know they are out there… you can feel Snake Way lending you its energy… but that’s not enough. You need to-‘

“I like to move it, movie it. I like to move it, move. I like to move it, move it. I like to… MOVE IT!”

Yamcha’s eyes snapped open, the faint white glow of the energy he’d gained from Snake Way still radiating from his hands as he stared at King Kai who had put on a pink sweatband upon his forehead, Bubbles and Gregory also sporting neon headbands as they stretched, a boombox blaring next to them. While King Kai had on his normal robes Bubbles and Gregory were wearing tank tops and shorts as they continued to move their arms about and march in place.

“If ya want to join us you need to be dressed properly,” King Kai commented.

“What are you doing?!?” Yamcha exclaimed, staring at the three in confusion and shock.

“Working out,” King Kai said. “I have to keep my glorious figure somehow!” He turned and began to wiggle his butt back and forth.

Yamcha stormed over to the boombox and shut it off.

That caused King Kai to stumble, falling onto his belly with his legs kicking rapidly for several moments before Bubbles and Gregory helped him back up. “What happened to the tunes?” He asked in confusion.

“I was trying to focus on performing the Spirit Bomb, King Kai!” Yamcha complained.

“…and?”

“And?!” Yamcha exclaimed. “And?!? I’m trying to practice the Spirit Bomb and you were distracting me!”

“Ah, right.” The blue little… man?... gave a shrug. “Okay then.”

He then reached over and turned on the boombox again.

Yamcha just watched as King Kai began to stretch and dance and wiggle again before with a grunt of frustration the scar-faced bandit turned the boombox off once more. He debated just smashing it to bits but King Kai got really mad when things of his broke because it could take a LONG time to get them repaired. His teacher was still mad about him breaking one of his windows.

“If ya want a different song you could just fastforward to the next one,” King Kai commented. Bubbles bobbed his head up and down. “He’s not a fan of ‘Pump Up The Jam’ but I think its great when I’m doing my jumping jacks-“

“This isn’t helping me!” Yamcha exclaimed in frustration. “I came here to get stronger, so I could help my friends defend the Earth from Raditz! And all I’ve done is chase Bubbles, hit Gregory with a hammer-“

“Which I’m still not happy about!” Gregory exclaimed, rubbing his head.

“-and then you give me some instructions but that isn’t enough!”

“Oh, it isn’t enough?” King Kai asked, raising a single brow. “Have you or have you not managed to increase your strength to the point that you can walk around my planet with ease?”

Yamcha frowned at that, lifting his leg up before putting it back down. That… was true…

“And tell me if I’m wrong but did you not learn how to perform my powerful strength-boosting technique, the Kaio-Ken?”

The dark haired man slowly nodded. He had learned how to do that and had been amazed at how it allowed him to grow so much more powerful so quickly. Yes, he’d been warned that on Earth he wouldn’t be able to push himself to the levels he currently was, since right now it didn’t matter how much stress he put himself under as, well, he was dead. But on Earth the Kaio-Ken could kill him if he pushed too hard.

‘Even though I think I could move beyond Kaio-Ken and go to Kaio-Ken Level 2… or 3… or 4!’

“So,” King Kai said, breaking Yamcha from his thoughts, “what exactly is it you need to practice? I mean… you are 50 times stronger than you were before!” He paused. “Not literally… I’m not keeping track of how strong you were when you got here. You could be 50, 100, or just 10. I have no idea.” He shrugged. “Point is you are stronger… ya got what you wanted!”

“Except I still can’t use the Spirit Bomb properly,” Yamcha complained. “I can’t extend my senses out far enough to borrow energy from others so-“

King Kai was suddenly in his face, waving his arms about wildly. “WHAT?!?! YOU’VE BEEN DOING WHAT?!?!”

“I… I’ve just been doing what you said, King Kai. Extending my senses to gather energy-“

“DON’T!” King Kai screamed. “You aren’t doing it right now, are you? Oh god, please tell me you aren’t doing it right now!!!”

“What’s the matter-no, I’m not doing it right now, King Kai. I was able to sense there were people out there but I wasn’t able to reach them…”

King Kai began to shake him hard. “Don’t! Don’t ever do that again! Not here you stupid, stupid man!” Yamcha felt his teeth rattle and managed a nod, King Kai instantly collapsing to the ground, his head pressed to the grass, arms covering his face. Yamcha was pretty sure he was crying. Looking past him he saw Bubbles and Gregory in the house… boarding it up.

“What’s the matter?” he asked, confused. “What’s the big deal?”

“Do you realize how far away the rest of the Core World People are from me?” he exclaimed. “500 times the length of Snake Way!”

Yamcha’s eyes went wide at that. He knew that according to King Kai Snake Way was three times the distance of the Earth to the Moon. He had no idea just how far 500 times Snake Way was but he had a feeling it was MASSIVE.

“Then… why didn’t I feel King Yemma?” Yamcha asked.

“Because he knows how to block and ignore the Spirit Bomb… and he knew you were training and didn’t mind. But there are people out there who wouldn’t be happy AT ALL that you were doing that!” He began to chew on his fingernails, clearly nervous. “You didn’t knock on their door and ask for a cup of sugar… you were trying to smash your way into their bedroom, toss them off their wife, and begin banging her yourself! That’s how they would have seen that! Would you like that?”

“No!” Yamcha said, aghast. “Why would you teach me a move like that!?!”

“Because you’d use it on Earth and I didn’t think you’d try drawing energy from an entire solar system! Learn how to use the Spirit Bomb!? You mastered it you idiot!”

“I did?” Yamcha said, a grin slowly forming on his lips. “That’s great!”

“Yeah, great,” King Kai said nervously, looking up at the sky. “Oh, please tell me you didn’t wake up Lord Beerus…”

~MC~MC~MC~

Whis suddenly looked up before glancing over at Beerus’ bed, the God of Destruction half flung across it with a snot bubble forming over one nostril and his jaw slack as he snored. Shaking his head he went back to tidying up their shared home, humming to himself as he did so.

~MC~MC~MC~

“Are you okay, sir?” Isco said. “You just did a full body shiver.”

“Fine, fine,” I muttered, swallowing before returning to putting toppings on my pizza; I’d convinced the gang that we should try something different for supper. “Just this feeling that we nearly suffered a world of pain.”

“I would think you’d be used to that, sir,” Isco said as I held out my hand, calling from the can of parmesan. “After all, you humans are merely pain receptacles hurtling towards oblivion.”

“Yes Isco, you are very fond of reminding me of that,” I said with a raised eyebrow. “I think you wrote that in my birthday card.”

“I did no such thing!” the drone gasped. “Wasting money on buying you something on your birthday… why celebrate the slow decay of your body? That makes no sense!”

“Of course, how foolish of me,” I said dryly before moving to put the next set of pizzas in the over… only for Goku to block my path.

“Is it done? Is it done?”

“Goku, I still need to cook them,” I told the man, trying to get around him only for him to lean down and stare intently as the pizza. “Move yo ass, Goku!” I snapped.

“Aw, come on… I’m sure these will be fine to eat now…”

“Goku…” I said slowly, warning him to back off. “I have a lot more pizzas to make-“ Thankfully the kitchen bots were doing most of the work, “-and you getting in the way is not making it happen any faster!”

“Aw, come on Kayos!” Goku whined, NOT getting the hint.

“Goku, the first pizzas will be out in 16 minutes. You can’t wait-“

I looked down at my hand to see that it was now empty, Goku having snatched the pizza from it and puzzling over how to properly eat the unbaked this.

“-okay then.” I said, rolling my neck before turning to the kitchen bots. “Keep up the work. Isco, will you film this?”

“Film what?” Goku asked… right before I hit him with a magical blast that sent him flying out of the room, the pizza he was holding hovering for a moment before dropping down into the waiting grasp of one of the kitchen droids.

“That,” I said before running out of the room, Goku already getting up, his smile tight and eyes narrowed as he fell into a defensive stance.

“Aw man, this is better than pizza!” Goku declared. “I’ve been wondering when you and I would get to fight!”

“Take it outside,” Piccolo said from where he seated in the living room, reading a paper of all things. “You know that Chichi won’t like it if you break anything in here and I don’t want to have to put up with her screeching.”

“Oh man, you’re right!” Goku said, his fight demeanor evaporating for a moment. “Come on Kayos, lets go outside!” I nodded and motioned for him to head out the doors first. “Alright, let’s-“

“Facility, Activate the Goku Protocol. Authorization Avo Kayos.”

“Recognized,” a robotic voice said and Goku turned back just in time to see metal shutters slam down over the door he’d just left from, locking him out of the research facility.

“Kayos?” Goku said, knocking on the shutter. “Hey Kayos, what’s going on?”

Knowing that the system was projecting my voice out I stated, “This is the Goku Protocol, used when you are being an impatient little bugger. You are now locked out of the facility for 30 minutes.”

I glanced over at one of the security cameras, seeing Goku standing there with a befuddled look on his face. “Wait… so we aren’t going to fight?”

“I don’t feel like dying,” I commented with a raised eyebrow. “I’m better with magic but you are still one of the two best fighters in the world.” With Piccolo sitting RIGHT THERE I wasn’t about to anger him by making any comments that could make it seem like I found him inferior to Goku.

Goku frowned. “Aw, come on Kayos, I’m sure you’d be able to do just fine!”

“Yeah, no. So you cool your jets for 30 minutes, okay?”

Goku deflated at that, sighing and tapping the metal barrier that had sealed up the facility. I merely watched him and, sure enough, a few moments later his eyes went wide. “Wait, 30 minutes!?! You said the pizza would be done in 16!”

“That’s right,” I said. “Which means all the rest of us are going to get to eat LOOOOOOOONG before you!”

“No!” Goku exclaimed with the same emotional distress he would have had if Radtiz suddenly appeared and threatened Roshi’s life. He began to pound on the walls of the facility, face twisted in desperation. “Come on Kayos! I was just kidding!”

“You tried to eat raw dough!” I snapped. “You have impulse issues so consider this an intervention!”

“I don’t have impulse issues!” Goku whined.

“Yes you do,” Bulma said, coming up from her lab, wiping her hands on a towel. “Also, what’s with the security barrier being up?”

“Goku Protocol,” I said simply.

“Ah, that makes sense.”

“Bulma, please let me in!” Goku pleaded.

“Sorry Goku but I can’t. Only the person who authorized the protocol can shut it down.”

I chimed in. “And I’m not going to. This is a lesson. When someone tells you that you can’t eat just yet you LISTEN. Because if you don’t then you’ll get locked out of a research facility.”

Piccolo stared at me, bemused. “That seems like an… oddly specific outcome.”

“Yes but its Goku so I can see it happening often,” I replied.

Isco floated over, considering the security footage of Goku desperately clawing at the barrier like a cat. “I think we should autotune this and make it into a song on the Internets, sir.”

“Did you just call it the Internets?”

Chichi chose that moment to come in, both her and Gohan wearing swimsuits. I had to admit that the last year had done wonders for her form; she hadn’t been ugly in the slightest but thanks to working out with Goku she was muscular and trim. She was wearing a one piece black bathing suit, her long hair for once not braided and tied up at all and instead trailing down her back. Gohan, meanwhile, was all smiles as he rubbed himself dry.

“Why is Goku outside of the facility? And what is with the metal shutters?”

“Goku Protocol,” I stated. “He tried to steal food before it was cooked so I tricked him outside. Now he’s on an eating time out.”

“Chichi, please!” Goku whimpered. “I promise I’ll wait five minutes before eating the pizza!”

“It takes 16 minutes, you idgit!” I called out.

Chichi tilted her head, considering the barrier. “Hmmm… perhaps I should ask Bulma to install one of these at our home. I do so get tired of trying to cook things only for Goku to snatch half of the ingredients off the counter because ‘he can not wait’.”

“Chichi!” Goku wailed.

“Huh, Goku Protocol?” Tien said as he, Chiaotzu, Master Roshi, and Krillin all finally entered. “I wondered why it suddenly got a bit darker in here.” We saw Goku step back and fly off; based on the banging he was trying to find a way to sneak back into the facility.

“Normally I’d be angry…” Krillin commented. “Buuuut that pizza is smelling good.”

“And I made plenty of variations so you can pick and choose your favorite,” I commented, motioning for the others to follow me towards the dining room. “Now, if you want to be sophisticated we have wine… I let Bulma pick that out-“

“Some great stuff,” she assured everyone.

“And if you want to relax there is beer. Krillin, Roshi, you handle that?”

“Like I’d let you near-“

“Poison, Poison, Poison,” I said, cutting Krillin off. “Right, yea, that. As for me, I’m going to be a child and join Gohan in having pop. We also have some breadstick coming-“

BANG!

The entire facility rattled.

“Huh,” Isco stated, hovering in the back with Piccolo since they were the only two that didn’t need to eat. “I was wondering how long it would take Goku to try and actually break in.”

“Should we be concerned?” Tien asked as the building rattled again.

“Nah,” Bulma said with a wave of her hand. “Remember how I did some readouts on all of your guys’ current Bulma Levels?”

“Is that we are calling it now?” I asked, tilting my head in confusion.

“Well, I monitored Goku and figured out just how strong he was. I then was able to input that into my computer and have it create a metal blend that would be able to withstand him. I figured if Raditz does decide to come early it would be good to have a bit of extra protection.”

Roshi glanced at me. “So, how’d ya trick him inta goin’ out there, anyway?”

“Made him think we were going to have a sparring match,” I replied.

That caused Roshi to shake his head. “Of course. Its good that boy is so eager ta train and fight but sometimes it just blinds him, ya know? We really need ta work on gettin’ that out of his system. Doesn’t help anyone if he’s so easily tricked!”

I nodded. “Yeah… and if he thinks he can get a better fight he’s liable to do something stupid and destructive.”

“What do you mean?” Tien asked, watching as the kitchen bots began to pull out more pizzas, cutting them up for all of us. There was meat lovers, cheese, veggie, supreme, even Hawaiian. Some, like Krillin, gravitated to old favorites like standard pepperoni, while others such as Bulma were bold, trying the ‘bee sting pizza’ that the bots had decided to make.

Snagging from a pan a slice of Detroit Style Meat Lovers I looked at Tien and stated, “Imagine Goku is fighting someone that you just got done taking down. You’ve managed to wear your opponent down, get them so they aren’t at 100%. The fate of the world is on the line and you did all you could to ensure that even if you couldn’t beat them their energy levels are low and Goku can finish them off.”

“Okay…” Tien said slowly.

“Can you NOT see Goku tossing that foe a Sensu Bean so he can have them back up to full strength because he wants to ‘test himself’?”

“No way!” Krillin exclaimed. “Goku would never do that!”

“I don’t think so,” Tien added.

“It a heartbeat,” Chichi stated as she bit into her veggie pizza.

The rest of the Z Fighters all turned and stared at her.

“What?” she asked, swallowing her mouthful.

“You… you think Goku would honestly do that?” Chiaotzu stammered out.

“Of course he would,” Chichi said with an eyeroll. “Goku believes in fair fights and he LOVES pushing himself. If he thought someone could do that, help he become even stronger, he would in an instant agree to let them heal up.”

Piccolo nodded grimly. “As someone who faced Goku before that is one of his weaknesses: he doesn’t go in for the kill. Instead he is more concerned with ‘having fun’.”

“He takes fights very seriously,” Tien argued.

“Yes, he does,” I said. “But he also allows his excitement and drive for a great fight to blind him to the dangers he’s in. Goku… Goku is the person that pushes a plane to fly even higher, because he wanted to experience the thrill of flight, but forgets that he’s down to half a tank.”

Roshi shook his head when we heard another boom, walking over and snagging a slice and a beer. “Have ta work with him on that, break him of that habit. Won’t do us any good if he’s obsessed with defeatin’ Raditz on his own. Supposed to be a team and all that!”

“It will have to wait though,” Bulma said, nodding towards a bottle of wine and earning a nod from Chichi. She poured them each a glass while I helped Gohan fill up his own cup. “Tomorrow we bring Yamcha back.”

“Hard to believe that its been a year already,” Chiaotzu said softly. “Feels like time has dragged by.”

“No it hasn’t,” Bulma said quietly, her smile from earlier having faded as she slowly swirled her wine. We all fell silent, eating our meals and thinking about all that had happened, the year that had gone by… and what was racing towards us.

BOOM!

“Come on guys!” Goku whined, returning to scratching at the door like a cat.

~MC~MC~MC~

Even though it was yet another beautiful day Kami could only stand on the edge of the Lookout, staff held tightly in his hands as he gazed out. He didn’t see the clouds or the blue sky… no, his gaze went far past that, to the greater world beyond. The one that he had worked so hard to be the Guardian of…

‘And yet am unable to actually be a part of,’ he thought, shutting his eyes. ‘Its funny… I know the tale so well. Told it to Goku so easily. How I sought to replace the previous guardian but could not so long as I had evil in my heart. So I cast it out… only to create King Piccolo, my dark and wicked reflection.’ He paused, looking down at his hands. ‘And more than that… even as I gained what I longed for, becoming the Guardian of Earth, I found it no longer the prize I sought.’

That had been the strangest thing of all, the entire process. Removing his darkness had been freeing. It was rather like what he assumed Goku felt when he removed his weighted clothes and was suddenly lighter than air… or at least felt that way. Yet when he’d sealed away his evil side and the previous Guardian had come to him and said he was ready he truly hadn’t had time to think. To focus on what it meant, all that he’d done. He’d been swept into taking on the role, learning about the Lookout, about those he would watch over…

…and found himself in the very spot he was in now, finding the role no longer mattered to him.

There wasn’t a need to toss it aside. He hadn’t been bitter or angry or the like. It was just… something was missing. That suddenly desperate need to become the Guardian was gone completely and all that was left was just… the knowledge he had to do something. He had went from craving a dessert to knowing he must finish it before he could leave the table.

‘Except I can never leave,’ he thought as he looked down at Earth.

“Are you okay, Kami?” Mr. Popo said, walking up to him.

Kami smiled as he turned to his dear friend. “Yes, of course.”

But Mr. Popo merely stared at him, unblinking.

So Kami sighed and admitted, “I am thinking about the world, Mr. Popo. The threat of the Saiyan warrior… it has made me think of over things. Things I have not considered in ages.”

“What do you mean?”

Kami sighed, shoulders slumping slightly. “I have very little memory of what I was like before I became the Guardian. I remember meeting my predecessor, of being so determined to take on the role of Guardian myself, to the point that I was…” He smiled.

“Obsessed,” Mr. Popo said and it was clear that wasn’t a question.

“Quite,” Kami admitted. “But before that? There is so very little. Until Piccolo was told by Raditz I wasn’t even aware that I wasn’t from Earth.” He looked up at the sky and though it was blue and bright he saw instead the darkness of space and the millions of stars out there, with billions of planets rotating around them, each with their own societies upon them. Did they all have Guardians too? Solemn men and women who were looking back at him, asking the same questions? “Is this how it was for the previous Guardian? Was he from another world? Did he forget as well?”

“No, Kami,” Mr. Popo said. “He was not and he did not. That was all you… or rather the you that you are now.”

That… made Kami pause. “You remember me,” Kami said suddenly. It was so obvious yet he’d never even considered it: Mr. Popo had known him BEFORE he’d become the Guardian of Earth! Now that he thought about it he couldn’t get that thought out of his head! Mr. Popo knew him…

“You were… different, from the previous Guardian. And not because you came from a different world.” Mr. Popo moved to stand beside Kami, arms folded behind his back, unblinking eyes taking in the sky around them. Kami wondered what he saw. Was his vision like Kami’s, where he could see beyond what mortal eyes saw? Or was it completely different from his own? Why had he never thought to ask?

‘Something I believe I will be wondering for some time, and about many different things,’ Kami thought before turning his focus back onto Mr. Popo. “What do you mean?”

“You were… obsessed with becoming the Guardian of this planet,” Mr. Popo informed him. “It terrified me at times… but also amused me. Your repeated attempts to prove that you were worthy of being the Guardian. Often you and I would sit after a long day of you trying to perform this feat or that in order to impress the last Guardian and discuss all that had gone right and wrong.” Mr. Popo smiled at that, a rarity for him because he was often quite solemn. “I am glad that carried over.”

The way he said it… it made Kami pause. He felt like he was in a dark hallway, having heard movement beyond a closed door, and while he didn’t know what he would find when he swung it open he both needed to do it and yet was terrified to do so. “Carried… over?”

Mr. Popo looked at him and then asked, “Are you asking for the truth?”

“Of course.”

But the genie shook his head. “You must say the words.”

That confused him. “Yes. I am asking for the truth.”

And at once it was like a great weight had been lifted from his shoulders. “The ritual you performed… your final attempt to prove your worthiness to become the next Guardian… it did not work as you thought.”

“What do you mean?” Kami asked.

“You told Goku that you removed your evil from your heart, so that you could be pure and thus become the Guardian. But that is not what you did.”

“Yes i-“ He stopped and shook his head. “I am sorry, my friend. What did I do?”

“You removed what you saw as negative.”

And at once Kami saw how very important that simple distinction was.

‘What is negative,’ he thought. ‘For some the urge to fight as Goku has is a negative… but for him it is a positive trait, one that makes him able to protect this planet. All traits, all feelings, can be good and evil. Positive and negative. And I, apparently, chose what I saw as negative…’

He was on the very edge of an important revelation.

“Mr. Popo…” he said softly, barely a whisper, “do you think… one of the negatives I removed… was my obsession to become the Guardian?”

His friend didn’t even have to say a word.

“So then it is my fault… but in a way I never imagined,” He murmured. “King Piccolo… he was not my evil half. He was… the things about myself that I thought would prevent me from becoming Guardian. But without them I found the desire to be Guardian dry up while within him, with no way to temper them, it became his desire to rule the world.”

“Do not think harshly of your past self,” Mr. Popo stated. “He was a brash youngster-“ And for Mr. Popo EVERYONE was a youngster, “-but he was kind as well. And funny, in his own dry way. Courageous. Heroic. Determined.” H e looked down sadly. “I have missed him greatly.”

His mouth twitched.

“But recently… I have seen echoes of him in Piccolo.”

“Why… did you never speak of this before?” But before his friend could answer Kami sighed. “I asked you not, didn’t I?”

“Not you… your former self. He told me not to speak of it unless he asked. You asked.”

“I wish I hadn’t done that,” Kami murmured. “When this is done, Mr. Popo… when the threat of the Saiyans is gone… will you tell me of who I once was?”

“Gladly.”

~MC~MC~MC~

‘Hopefully they gather the dragon balls up soon… this Dragon Moon is so very tiresome. It keeps me from so many entertaining things. There was a new movie I wished to watch-‘

I shook my head as I set my Dragon Ball, the one Bulma had tossed at me without a second thought, down next to the others. I was hearing voices again and that was NEVER a good sign.

Having heard Shenron speak I at least knew that the voice was his. But that didn’t make me feel any better… GT’s Shadow Shenrons were dancing in my head, tormenting me. It meant being SUPER careful with our wishes and not letting them be used for foolish or stupid things…

‘Or maybe throw in a good wish?’ I thought to myself. ‘We have a Dragon Moon… it would be risky but if we could all survive Raditz and not have Vegeta and Nappa show up we could avoid needing to use a wish for several years. No Frieza. Cell wouldn’t have his DNA so he might be a lot weaker… and if I could find a way to find Gero I could eliminate him and Cell and make sure we didn’t have to deal with that. So we could go easily 3 years without the Dragon Balls. Maybe ‘Oh Mighty Shenron, go have a spa day just for yourself’? Would that be within his power?’

We had brought the Dragon Balls up from the vault and were now preparing to bring Yamcha back. Everyone was super nervous but even more excited. Chichi had taken over the kitchen, making up Yamcha’s favorite meals. Chiaotzu and Krillin had put up streamers and decorations. Roshi had been brewing ‘some fine ol’ whisky!’ to celebrate his return. It was like he’d come back from vacation and not been dead.

Considering how the gang treated the Afterlife as a revolving door…

The Dragon Balls pulsed in time with one another, like a heartbeat. It felt so odd to be doing this again, like it was the most natural thing in the world. I’d seen this in the anime several times and yet it was so vastly different BEING there. Even having spent a year with the gang, getting to know them not as characters but as living breathing people… my friends… still didn’t change-

“Alright!” Goku declared. “Let’s bring Yamcha back!” He thrust his hands into the air. “Eternal Shenron! By your name I summon you forth!”

The Dragon balls glowed pure white before shooting off beams of energy that merged together to form a single pillar that twisted and shifted into the glowing form of Shenron. He looked over us, taking up the entire sky, and I fought the urge to tremble in terror at the sight of him. He was MASSIVE… somehow I’d forgotten just how BIG the dragon was! It truly made me feel small and meaningless when faced with a being of that raw power.

“I am the Eternal Dragon!” Shenron proclaimed. “State your wish and I shall grant it!”

Goku nodded, a grin forming on his lips. “Oh Mighty Shenron! I-“

“Goku?” Chichi suddenly called out.

“Oh? What is it? Do you want to make the wish?”

“No,” his wife told him… before waving at me. “I think Kayos should make the wish.”

“HIM!?!” Krillin exclaimed. “He might-“ Chichi glared at him and Krillin instantly backed down.

“As I was saying,” she said, biting into each word, “Kayos showed last time he’s really good at wording things. We want to make sure we get this right, don’t we?”

“Oh yeah!” Goku said with a laugh before waving me forward. “You’re super smart when it comes to things like this, Kayos! You should probably make the wish.”

I glanced at the others but seeing none of them speaking out against the idea I merely nodded and stepped forward. “Oh Mighty Shenron!” I called out… before dropping my voice to a bit more of a conversational tone. “Thanks for the Scroll, by the way. And sorry about the Dragon Moon, we’ll make this quick and try and not summon you again until its over.”

“While appreciated I still need a wish to be made!” Shenron declared firmly.

“Right,” I said. “We wish to bring back our friend Yamcha-“ I held up my finger, making it clear I wasn’t done, “and when I say ‘Bring back’ I mean bringing him back to life and having him appear right here before us. With all the training and-“

“I will not be petty with how I grant this wish,” Shenron declared, much to my surprise. “If only to get you to stop rambling on.”

“Admittedly I do do that.”

There was a flash of light in front of me… and there was Yamcha, looking about wildly. He was clearly surprised, eyes wide and mouth hanging slightly open.

“Your wish has been granted! FAREWELL!”

And with that the Dragon Balls rose in the air before shooting out in seven different directions.

“Whoa… that was-“ Yamcha didn’t get to finish as he was tackled from opposite directions by Krillin and Bulma, the two hugging him tight. “Hey guys,” he said softly even as Goku came directly at him, lifting him up in the air and dragging him and the other two into a massive hug. Tien merely smirked before ambling over, Chiaotzu less restrained as he glomped onto Yamcha’s face.

“Careful, everyone,” Chichi said as she walked over, holding Gohan in her arms, “we wouldn’t want to send him back to King Kai!”

Yamcha gasped a bit of air as they let go… though Goku was making sure to still have an arm slung around his friend’s shoulders. “Yeah… though I admit that would be a far better way to go…”

“Uncle Yamcha!” Gohan said excitedly, reaching out for the bandit. He blinked before taking Gohan from Chichi, settling Gohan in his arms.

“Yeah,” Krillin said with a smile, “that’s a thing now.”

Goku nodded rapidly. “And why not? You’re my brother, Yamcha!”

“I… I am, man?”

Goku just beamed and squeezed him a bit tighter.

“We give them a day,” I said as Roshi began to talk with Yamcha, asking him about his training. “One day to just relax.”

Piccolo nodded as Bulma asked Isco to take some pictures of everyone. “And then we buckle down and focus.”

Because the two of us realized that Yamcha returning wasn’t all smiles and laughter.

It was a reminder.

Raditz… was coming.

Chapter Text

Some Time Later…

It could easily be said that at that moment the small clearing in the forest was the most peaceful and beautiful spot in the entire world.

The sun was bright but it wasn’t so hot that it made one miserable being under its rays. There was a slight breeze that didn’t so much blow up against a person but tickled them playfully. The air was crisp and clean and the colors of the plant life that made up the forest were as brilliant as they had ever been. There were no predators about, no dangers. If one had thrown down a picnic blanket they could have had a lovely day eating and laughing.

But there was no one around. Not a soul. Even the animals had scurried away.

For they had sensed the one being that would end the peace of that moment descending from the sky.

Raditz’ pod slammed down into the clearing; he didn’t actually NEED to do that, as the pods were designed to land rather smoothly and quietly upon the ground, but Raditz always enjoyed making an entrance and nothing startled the helpless citizens of whatever world he was going to glass as him crashing down like a vengeful fist. It also helped get his blood pumping for a fight, which was another benefit.

He stepped out of his pod and smirked.

Exactly 13 Months Since Raditiz fought Goku and Piccolo

“Ugh… this place still stinks,” Raditiz complained as he stepped out of the pod, taking a moment to get his lungs to adjust to the air around him. Any lethargic feelings that he still had even after the crash went away with his first deep breath. “Damn that’s good!” he proclaimed as he cracked his neck and rolled his shoulders. “Man, it feels like I took a stimulate!” The clean air of the world might have been offensive to his nose and spoke to his brother’s utter failure in doing his duty but after spending over a year on that sulfurous planet the air of Earth was supercharging his lungs. “Feels like I can shatter this entire damn planet with my bare hands!”

“Heh, you think you can manage that?”

Raditz whipped around, eyes wide in shock as he stared at Nappa.

“What… what are you doing here?” he demanded of the bald older warrior, rushing to quickly gain control of himself.

“Vegeta wants to see what your brother is capable of,” Nappa responded. “When we found out you were going to be fighting him we decided it was time to see just what he could do.”

“Prince Vegeta is coming here?” Raditz asked. ‘Damn it, that won’t work at all! I need Kakarot to be my surprise weapon against him. If he sees him fighting me he’ll be able to study his moves and be better able to defend against them!’

But Nappa laughed at that. “You think Vegeta has time to waste watching you and your brother roll in the dirt? He sent me to watch you and make sure you don’t embarrass us all!”

Raditz nodded at that. Normally he would have been insulted by Nappa’s comments but in this case he was far too focused on the opportunities his arrival offered. ‘I’m stronger than him now… according to the scouter reading I took of myself just month ago I’ve surpassed Nappa’s power level at long last. With him here it would be easy to defeat him and force him to submit. And if he didn’t then I could always kill him and blame the Earthlings for it.’ Raditz smirked. ‘Yes… that might just work!’

“Well?” Nappa demanded, crossing his arms over his chest and leering at Raditz. “Are we actually going to take out this low class trash that is your brother or are we going to sit here wasting time?”

Raditz merely nodded his head. “Very well… I will show you how strong Kakarot has grown and how he will be of use to us.”

And with that the two Saiyans took off.

~MC~MC~MC~

“And no matter what you are to remain here, understood?” Chichi said, kneeling down in front of Gohan.

“But mom, I can help!” the little boy proclaimed. He had his shield strapped to his back and the Power Pole grasped in his hand.

“And you are, son!” Goku declared from just behind Chichi; he was stretching his limbs, readying for the fight to come. They had all sensed Raditz’s return and the Z Fighters, even though they’d been preparing for that moment and knew it was approaching, were still scrambling to put their final touches on all their plans. “You are making sure that Raditz doesn’t get anywhere near the Dragon Balls!”

“That’s right,” Chichi said sternly. “If Raditz gets them then he could wish for immortality-“

“Even though that’s a dumb wish?” Gohan asked, remembering Kayos’ comments about how such a wish was useless.

“he doesn’t know that though,” Chichi reminded him. “And even then he might wish for something else, something that would hurt us. You need to stay here with Isco, Baba, and Yajirobe, to make sure that no one gets to them.” The heavy set fighter had decided that it would be best for him to remain behind, seeing as he’d put in little training…

~Earlier~

“WHY DIDN’T YOU TELL ME THAT THESE SAIGANS WERE COMING!?!?” Yajirobe cried out, making the rest of the Z Fighters cringe. They were standing outside of the research facility that had been their home for the last 13 months, having been ready to make final preparations for Raditz’s arrival only to be interrupted by the squat warrior who had appeared suddenly come driving up to them in what many of them assumed was a stolen car, leaping out screaming.

Krillin waved his hands about. “We thought you wouldn’t want to be bothered-“

“ABOUT YOUR MEANINGLESS STUPID THINGS!” the warrior roared right in Kirllin’s face, causing the man to go flying back, Tien just managing to catch him. “I DON’T CARE ABOUT YOU FOOLS GOING BOWLING OR DECIDING TO LEARN HOW TO DRIVE CARS!”

“Like I would ever learn how to drive a car,” Piccolo muttered under his breath only to start when Yajirobe suddenly popped up in front of him.

“YOU SHUT YOUR GREEN MOUTH!” the large man screamed. Piccolo’s eyes widened at that, shocked that the short little dumpy man was being so bold around him. But though he opened his mouth to tell him off he shut it after a moment, lips pressed together in utter silence as Yajirobe whipped around and pointed a finger at the rest of the group. “I DON’T CARE THAT YOU GO HANG OUT AND HAVE PICNICS-“

“Yes you do,” Kayos commented, merely raising an eyebrow when Yajirobe turned his rage on him. “Am I wrong?”

“…who the hell are you?” the saumari demanded, not bothering to answer the question.

“Avo Kayos and I really need to get going.” Before anyone could say a word Kayos rose into the air, giving a cheeky wave before blasting away.

“COWARD!” Bulma shouted, shaking her fist at the man’s retreating form.

“Kayos isn’t a coward,” Goku pointed out. “He has to go and-“

“WHY DIDN’T YOU TELL ME ABOUT THE SAIYANS!?!?” Yajirobe yelled, reminding them all how angry he was.

“Well, we told you now,” Goku pointed out with a grin.

“Ooooooooh nooooo,” Chichi said softly.

“What?” Goku said, looking about only to realize everyone was moving away from him. “What? What’s going on?”

Yajirobe suddenly leapt up and stuck his fingers up Goku’s nose, making the Saiyan cry out in pain as he was forced to bend down.

“THAT! ISN’T! GOOD! ENOUGH!” Yajirobe snarled, ignoring Goku’s yelps. “I COULD HAVE PREPARED!”

“YOU would have fought with us?” Tien asked, crossing his arms over his chest.

“Hell no!” Yajirobe declared, turning to Tien (though not releasing Goku who continued to plead to be let go). “But I could have found a place to hide with plenty of pork buns to get me through this mess!”

“…what?” Bulma said, everyone else sweatdropping at the man’s comment.

Yajirobe released Goku, who fell to the ground and cupped his nose, whimpering in pain. He turned on his heels and walked back towards the research facility. “You better have a stocked pantry. If I’m going to die because you made some alien angry then I at least want to be full!”

~MC~MC~MC~

Gohan gave his mother a serious nod, making her smile at the look of determination that was in his eyes. “I will, mommy!” He gave her a salute and she stroked his cheek, smiling fondly.

“I know you will,” she said. “Now give me a hug…” Gohan hurried into her embrace, Chichi closing her eyes and holding him tight.

“Do you have to go?” Gohan asked.

“Yes, my sweet prince,” she said softly. “I need to make sure that your daddy comes back. You know how silly he gets.”

“But who will make sure you come back?” Gohan asked and it broke her heart that her sweet son had to worry about such things. He should be focused on having fun and playing games and studying… not that his parents might die trying to save the world.

“I will,” Piccolo said, causing Chichi to jump. She hadn’t heard him sneak up on her! “I’ll make sure she gets back to us, okay kid?”

“Okay!” Gohan said with a determined little nod that made Chichi smile despite the serious situation they found themselves in.

Turning to Piccolo she asked, “What do you think our chances are, anyway?”

“If everything goes as planned?” he said with his normal rumble. “Pretty good, I would say.”

“Except things never go to plan, do they?” Chichi asked.

That dark comment though made Piccolo smirk. “That isn’t always a bad thing, you know. After all, my plan was to kill your husband originally.”

Chichi blinked before shooting a side-eye stare at the Namekian. “Right…”

“Alright everyone!” Roshi called out, getting the Z Warriors’ attention. “Its time we get a move on. Now remember, just because we have Dragon Balls waitin’ for us back here doesn’t mean that we should be takin’ needless risks. Especially Yamcha, Krillin, Chiaotzu, and of course yours truly. “ Unlike other times when he introduced himself or wanted to draw everyone’s attention towards him this time there was no smile on his face and smug sense of superiority. No… there was just a quiet grimness that came from the fact that he knew that if he died that would be it for him. “As such if things get dicy we will be moving back to allow the rest of you to fight on.”

“Don’t worry, Master Roshi!” Yamcha declared, holding a fist out in front of his face. “With everything I learned from King Kai I am more than ready to take on Raditz and stop that filthy Saiyan once and for all!” He suddenly yelped. “Uh… sorry Goku, no offense.”

“Why would I be offended?” Goku asked, tilting his head. “I’m not smelly… I take baths all the time!”

That brought a few chuckles and smiles, which was good for everyone as they needed it. Roshi’s reminder, while needed, also was a grim note that for nearly half of them they were now fighting a battle where giving it their all might help save the world… but would mean they couldn’t be a part of it.

Roshi looked over at Piccolo.

“That goes for you as well.”

The green-skinned warrior huffed at that, folding his arms over his chest. That had been a point of contention amongst the group ever since they’d begun drawing up battle plans. If Piccolo died Kami would die with him. And that would mean the end of the Dragon Balls. Even those that still could be brought back would face death with no hope of returning.

Bulma glanced at Piccolo. “And you are sure you can’t…”

“No,” Piccolo said sternly. “I haven’t… matured… enough to be able to produce an egg. And certainly can’t produce one that I link myself to in order to keep Kami alive.”

“Too bad we can’t just make a wish to delink you,” Krillin commented.

Tien shook his head. “We went over that option. If we do that then Kami could die instantly.” Piccolo glowered at the reminder that Kami was only able to reach his advanced age he was currently at and still maintain the power needed to keep the Dragon Balls going was thanks to Piccolo. Chichi knew that if it were her she wouldn’t like being seen as little more than a battery for someone else.

“Well, I think that’s about it,” Goku said with a firm nod and a slight smile. “No use wasting any more time… its time to meet up with Raditz and finally put an end to his threat.”

“Right!” everyone declared, rising in the air. Goku himself hopped on Nimbus, wanting to conserve every drop of energy he had, while Chichi forced herself to stabilize… she still wasn’t’ the greatest flyer there was but she was managing considering she’d just learned the skill. Still, she managed to get herself to be on an even keel and with a final wave to Gohan rocketed off with the rest of the Z Fighters, Bulma following just behind in her vehicle.

‘I just hope we are all able to say hello to those we’re leaving behind,’ Chichi thought to herself.

~MC~MC~MC~

“How’s the body working for you, Isco?” Roshi asked, looking over the droid. Or rather the metal form the droid was piloting from the safety of the island.

“Quite well,” Isco replied. The humanoid form wasn’t overly large and bulky, with spindly legs and arms and a small compact chest with no actual neck but rather a single pillar with optics all over it that gave Isco, according to him, full 360 degree line of sight. While the limbs looked fragile Roshi knew they were VERY tough and also designed to quickly move about the battle field. He wasn’t going to destroy a foe with a single blast that could wipe a city off the map; no, Isco would defeat you with a thousand quick strikes before you could lay a single punch.

“Hmmm, here’s hopin’ then that it does the job.”

Isco merely glanced at Roshi… or at least Roshi THOUGHT he was glancing at him. It was hard to tell in that body he was piloting. “Would it not have been wise for you and those that could die to remain behind?”

“Heh, maybe,” Roshi said with a smirk. “But I ain’t the wisest person on the planet, that’s for sure. Sides, what’s the use of livin’ if the planet dies?”

“I suppose that it is true, though it feels incorrect to say…”

Whatever else Isco might have said was cut off by the sound of two approaching forms.

“Here they come…” Tien said softly.

Roshi walked over to Yamcha, smiling at the young man softly before whispering, “You sure you are up for this?” He knew that for some fighters facing the foe that had defeated them left a mark, causing them to be unable to face them again without remembering the damage they had taken. And for Yamcha it wasn’t merely a broken bone or a scar he had to deal with… it was the memory of his own death that would haunt him.

But to his credit Yamcha merely smirked. “More than ready, Master Roshi. I have been waiting a year to get some payback on that bastard.”

The old man merely nodded before turning back to Raditz. The Saiyan warrior’s armor was chipped and cracked, with parts of his shoulder pieces missing and a few cuts in the chest piece. But otherwise he looked ready for a fight which worried Roshi greatly. He glanced over at Bulma who was still standing next to her vehicle and she subtly raised her handheld device, scanning him before grimacing. It wasn’t full of terror so at least they had that going for them but Roshi also knew from the way she was looking that it wasn’t good news either.

‘He’s been trainin’… we knew he would be but it looks like it was just as intensive as us.’ There had been the hope, if slight, that Goku or Piccolo might be able to become stronger than Raditz and thus quickly win the fight. But from the way Bulma was looking that hope was gone and now they would need to rely upon skill and teamwork in order to take down the threat. ‘Goku has taken on stronger foes before,’ Roshi thought to himself as Raditz drew closer. ‘I want this to be just like those times. But… I’m worried that all the times luck has been on our side has drained it down… and now we’ll find ourselves out of luck.’

~MC~MC~MC~

‘This is what you trained for,’ Krillin thought to himself as he watched Raditz approach. ‘That’s the bastard that killed your friend… your brother. And he wants to kill everyone else you love.’ He clenched his hands into fists… before relaxing. Such things were useless, wasteful moves. He needed to be calm. Collected. To conserve every bit of strength he had. ‘Raditz… you are going to pay for everything you’ve put us through.’

~MC~MC~MC~

Tien glanced at Chiaotzu. “How are you?”

“Nervous,” Chiaotzu whispered. “This feels… different, Tien.”

“I know,” he murmured. “This doesn’t feel like anything else we’ve ever been a part of this. This is a different kind of fight.”

“It feels like we’re on the edge of something really, really important,” Chiaotzu commented. “That this battle is the start of something new.”

Tien nodded slightly. “Yeah… I feel the same way. We make it through this and we’ll be entering a whole new world.”

Chiaotzu smiled at that. “Then let’s make sure all of our friends are there to join us.”

“Yeah.”

~MC~MC~MC~

“You ready to face this guy again?” Piccolo asked, glancing down at Goku.

“Of course I am,” Goku said, though not with the usual good humor that Piccolo was used to hearing in his words. “I’m ready to see just how much stronger I’ve gotten. And show him that the people of Earth aren’t weak.” He glanced at Piccolo. “Aren’t you?”

“Oh, I am,” Piccolo said with a sharp smirk. “Just wanted to make sure that the beatdown you’d taken hadn’t robbed you of your fighting spirit.”

“Not at all,” Goku declared, eyes narrowing. “It showed me how lax I had become. I’ve been thinking about this rematch for the last 13 months.”

They didn’t get to say anymore as Raditz dropped down before them along with his companion.

“So… you actually showed up,” Raditz declared. “And I can tell that you’ve taken your training seriously. Good. I’ll be putting all of that to good use.” He scanned the other Z Fighters. “And the rest of you have gotten stronger too. Hmmm… maybe I’ll spar you as well after we conquer this planet. You might be of use, after all.”

Yamcha dropped into a fighting stance. “If you think we’d ever stand with you then you’re mistaken.”

“I said that you’d have a use, not that you’d stand with me.” Raditz scoffed. “You are strong, human… but you aren’t that strong.” Raditiz looked around. “Now… where is that mouthy blond human? The one that suggested we wait this long for this fight?”

“Oh, he’s around,” Goku said with a smirk. “I see you found your friend.”

Before Raditz could say a word the bald warrior spoke up. “Mind your tongue you low class wretch. I am Nappa, second to Vegeta, the Prince of All Saiyans!” He took a step forward, sneering at them all. “If you are little more than mindless pathetic lackies to Raditz then to me you are slime that I wipe off my boot!” He jerked his head in Raditz’s direction. “I’m just here to make sure this idiot doesn’t mess things up.”

Raditz glowered at that but only for a second; the rebellious look disappeared and was replaced with his smug superiority. Piccolo had seen it, however, and made a mental note of that. It might come in handy.

“Nappa is right,” Raditz declared. “You are all weak compared to us. But… if you are so anxious to test yourselves then I suppose we can help you.” And with that he pulled out a vial of liquid. “I’ve been holding onto this… was thinking of just when the proper time would be to pull this out but I think now is perfect. They are my last 4 but I doubt I’ll lose them that quickly.” With that he uncorked the vial and spilled four drops onto the ground, watching as the liquid seeped into the soil.

It only took seconds for the ground to begin bucking and rising before green bulbs began to rise up. They looked like wrinkly potatoes in Piccolo’s opinion.

But then the ground buckled all the more and from the earth burst creatures…

Piccolo had come to accept that he wasn’t what he thought he was. He wasn’t a demon. He was an alien from another world. Just like Goku apparently. It was just that Earth held so many different beings that it was easy for people to believe him to just be a different looking kind of Earthling.

The creatures that emerged from the ground next to Raditz? They were aliens. That’s all they could ever be. He wondered if even on their home planet they could be considering as something OTHER than alien.

They were hideous things with squat bodies but long arms and legs that ended in pincer-like fingers. While it at first appeared like they were wearing some kind of armor Piccolo could see that in reality they actually just had a bulky middle, as if they were bugs whose soft squishy limbs had burst from their hard shells. Their eyes were a pale red with small black dots for pupils and their mouths were all twisted in leering dark smiles, cruel and full of dark intent.

“Whoa!” Goku suddenly exclaimed. “Where did you guys get Bio-Men?”

“These are… wait, what?” Raditz blinked in confusion. “What did you call them?”

“Bio-Men!” he chirped. “They look a bit different from the last ones we dealt with… are these a different version?”

“These are not Bio-Men,” Raditz said in annoyance. “I’ve never even heard of Bio-Men. These are Saibamen.” He flashed an arrogant smirk. “They originally hailed from a planet close to our own home planet of Vegeta. Our ancestors found them and modified them on a genetic level to become what you see now: loyal foot soldiers sent into battle to deal with the pests.”

“…that still kind of sounds like the Bio-Men,” Roshi commented.

“Like a lot,” Chiaotzu added.

“They aren’t Bio-Men!” Raditz snarled. “They are Saibamen and they are your doom! Each one of these Saibamen have a power level of 1200!”

“So in other words,” Nappa added, “as strong as Raditz here!” He laughed at that, though Piccolo noticed Raditz glower at the reminder of his strength.

‘He meant it as a threat… but Raditz took that as an insult. Does that mean the other Saiyans are far more powerful that Raditz?’ He frowned, still watching the Saibamen carefully, waiting for them to attack. They looked like they should be savage beasts that leapt at the chance to harm anything that got near them but instead the Saibamen merely remained tense and ready, utterly silent and still as they stared ahead. ‘If that’s the case then I hope we don’t have to face any of them soon. Even with how powerful we’ve grown we aren’t ready for that kind of a battle.’

“So… why are they just standing there then?” Krillin asked, remaining tense.

“The Saibamen are so rare because we carefully breed and program absolute obedience into them,” Raditz stated smugly. “They will do nothing until given a command. So then… any volunteers to die?”

With that… Yamcha stepped forward.

“I’ve been waiting for this for 13 months,” he said, narrowing his eyes.

“You’ve been waiting to die?” Raditz asked.

“Waiting to get my revenge on you. For trying to kill my friend. For killing me.”

“I killed you?” Raditz asked, raising an eyebrow.

That caused Yamcha to pause. “You don’t remember?”

“Do you have any idea how many people I’ve killed? You are just another face amongst the corpses.” He reached up and rubbed his chin. “But how did you manage to come back to life if I killed you?”

“Oh, we have these things called-“

“Enough squawking!” Nappa snapped. “Just kill him again Raditz!”

Once more Goku’s biological brother tensed but otherwise did nothing else to the bald Saiyan that was ordering him about. “Very well,” he finally said. “Saibamen, killed that scarred fool. Bring me him in tiny pieces!”

It was instantaneous.

The four Saibamen went from standing motionless to springing into action, clawed hands raised up and mouths twisting into feral grins as they shrieked so loudly that Piccolo had to fight not wincing. They rushed at Yamcha, arms extended-

“WOLF FANG KICK!”

The head of the first Saibaman was ripped clean from its body as Yamcha spun kicked it off, sending the head bouncing away. The body fell to the ground and skidded a few feet, twitching near Tien’s feet before going still. Everyone stared at it for a moment but the other Saibamen, with no thought of self preservation after that attack, continued to rush Yamcha. The former bandit though twisted his body before grabbing onto the second Saibaman by the back of its neck, driving his fist down into its spine with a hideous crack. The armored torso began to come apart like an egg shell and Yamcha whipped around, hurling it at the third and sending them both flying away before he leapt into the air and fired off a Ki blast that reduced the third to little more than particles.

“Well,” Yamcha said as he landed, “I’m thinking the real reason those things are rare is because they die so easily.”

Raditz though mere scoffed. “You managed to defeat three of them… impressive. We Saiyans fight hordes of them for practice though, so don’t be too pleased with yourself.” He shut his eyes, arms folded over his chest. “Also, you missed one.”

Suddenly the fourth Saibaman, the one that had been knocked away, rushed Yamcha, arms spread wide.

“STOP!” Nappa yelled out, the Saibaman instantly stopping.

“What are you doing?” Raditz demanded, glaring at the other Saiyan even as Yamcha twisted around and drove his fist through the Saibaman’s stomach, taking him out. “He was about to detonate that pathetic human!”

“And you are so pathetic you need those little green Brussels sprouts to fight your battles for you?” Nappa asked. “I thought you were the great Raditz! Yet you hide behind the Saibamen?”

Raditz… frowned.

“What is wrong with you?”

Nappa smirked… before his hand suddenly lashed out and Raditz let out a scream as his entire body seized up, electricity running through his body and making him shake. After a moment he fell to the ground, huffing and in pain but still alive, though from the way he was twitching it was clear the attack had hurt him greatly.

“That worked rather well, Bulma,” Nappa said, tossing the taser he’d just used in her direction. “Just like you said.”

“What… what are you doing, Nappa?” Raditz groaned, clawing at the ground. “When Vegeta hears you’ve betrayed him…”

“Oh… you still think I’m Nappa.”

And with that there was a poof of smoke, revealing Kayos where the bald Saiyan had been moments earlier.

“I’m so glad you can’t sense energy,” he said before quickly flying out of Raditz’ grasp. Which was good because the Saiyan made a grab for him, just missing.

“I’ll… I’ll kill you for that!” Raditz roared as he struggled to get to his feet.

“Hey guys!” Kayos shouted. “This isn’t a spectator sport!”

At once Goku, Tien, Chiaotzu, Yamcha, and Krillin leapt forward, moving at Raditz even as the Saiyan got to his feet and let out a scream of rage.

Kayos landed nearly Chichi and Piccolo, shaking his head. “Seriously… if he had been able to sense energy I would have been fucked.”

“But that was impressive,” Chichi admitted. “I forgot several times you weren’t that other Saiyan.”

“How did you know what he looked and sounded like?” Piccolo asked, raising a brow.

“Scroll of Knowledge,” Kayos stated. He glanced back at Goku, who was now delivering a flurry of kicks and punches at Raditz. Where during their last fight he’d had trouble dealing with his brother, finding nearly all of his strikes blocked, now he was landing a lot of decent hits and able to block just as many that Raditz tried to send his way. “Showed me how to hack into their equipment to figure out what him and his leader, Vegeta, sounded like.”

Piccolo frowned at that. ‘He’s lying. I can tell by the way he’s holding himself that isn’t what he did. But why hide the real reason? What does he have to gain by not telling us the truth-‘

“YOU WILL ALL DYING SCREAMING!” Raditz roared before firing off several large Ki Blasts.

“Okay, discuss later. Fight now!” With that Kayos rose into the air, actually moving towards the Ki Blasts rather than dodging. “White Flag!” he shouted as he began to gather up the Ki Blasts.

“Right,” Piccolo said, narrowing his eyes before he burst forward, taking over for Goku after he was hit in the stomach by a blast and sent sideways. Piccolo aimed a shot at Raditz’ head, the Saiyan not able to catch it but able to deflect it away. Piccolo though used the momentum he’d built up from that strike to throw another punch with his other hand at the Saiyan’s armored middle. It didn’t actually hurt the alien but he did feel the armor crack and buckle.

“That was almost clever of your little blond friend!” Raditz said snidely even as he moved to grab Piccolo’s wrist, most likely wanting to break it. But Piccolo easily twisted out of the way before he began to attack Raditz once more, the Saiyan raising his forearms to block the strikes from hitting his head. “He managed to trick me good… but I already feel the after effects of that shock going away! And I am FAR stronger than I was when we fought the last time!”

“Oh yeah?” Piccolo asked as he leapt away. “So am I. SPECIAL BEAM CANON!”

Rather than the normal 5 minutes to charge the attack Piccolo was able to fire off that attack the instant he thrust out his hand, Raditz forced to twist out of the way and right into the path of Krillin who delivered a knee to the Saiyan’s belly before bringing his hand up and firing a needle-thin Ki blast. But while it might have been small the effect was devastating, sending Raditz flying down into the ground.

“In fact,” Piccolo said with a smug smile as he began to float down, “you’ll find that all of us have vastly improved.”

“It won’t be ENOUGH!” Raditz roared as he leapt from the ground. “You think you can defeat me because I gave you a few extra months to train? I was born for this! Bred for this! My entire life spent honing my body into the ultimate weapon of destruction!” He swung at Piccolo who just barely managed to dodge; he could feel Raditz’ energy increasing as his rage pushed him further. “I will not be shown up by some pathetic lifeforms that call a disgusting backwater planet home! You will submit or you will be crushed under my foot!” He managed to get a hard hit in on the side of Piccolo’s head, making him tumble before Raditz caught him and flung him down into the ground, Piccolo slamming into the earth near where Raditz himself had fallen.

Piccolo looked up in time to see Tien and Goku coming at Raditz, the two working together to try and take the Saiyan warrior down. But Raditz was beginning to behave as he had in their first fight, becoming faster than their blows, able to dodge their hits and force them to over extend themselves. He kicked Tien in the thigh before moving to knee him in the face only for Goku to intercept, the two locking fingers as they grappled in the air, faces nearly touching.

“I love fighting as much as the next person,” Goku said as he struggled to overpower his brother. “I love pushing myself to the next level. Testing myself against others to see where I stack up. Learning new ways to fight and harness my energy. And maybe, if I had grown up like you, I’d have come to see the world as you do. But these last 13 months? That was a gift you gave to me. Because it allowed me to see that there was more to life than fighting.”

~MC~MC~MC~

Tien and Goku sat on a beach together, panting after a long sparring session, their backs pressed against the same tree as they passed back and forth a large jug of water.

~MC~MC~MC~

Bulma grinned as she plunked down next to Goku, resting her head on his shoulder as the movie began to play.

~MC~MC~MC~

Krillin burst into laughter as Goku was dragged into the ocean by the large fish he’d caught on his line, the Saiyan popping his head back up after a few moments and joining in.

~MC~MC~MC ~

Piccolo and Goku sat on the roof of the research facility, watching as the stars twinkled above them, both wondering if they were seeing the star that their home planets had circled.

~MC~MC~MC~

Yamcha tossed a marshmallow across the room, Goku making a diving leap to catch it in his mouth, his brother crying out and pumping his fists in the air when Goku managed to snag it.

~MC~MC~MC~

Chiaotzu went over the steps of the dance he’d created, Goku struggling to match him but refusing to give up after Krillin had told him he had no chance of mastering it.

~MC~MC~MC~

Goku watched in awe as Master Roshi did a perfect dive into the swimming pool, barely causing any water to splash out do to his perfect technique.

~MC~MC~MC~

Gohan cheered as Goku raced through the clearing, his son sitting happily on his shoulders as Goku raced about making car noises

~MC~MC~MC~

Sitting at the kitchen counter Goku watched with wide eyes as Kayos began to layer on more bacon upon the burgers he was making, Goku salivating at the sight even as the blond man explained what he was doing.

~MC~MC~MC~

Goku sat on the floor of the living room, not even bothering to get up as Isco projected the grainy black and white footage he’d restored of Grandpa Gohan when he’d been younger fighting in a tournament.

~MC~MC~MC~

Chichi rested on top of Goku, fast asleep even as he stroked her hair, a faint smile on his lips.

~MC~MC~MC~

“I trained, yes, but I got to spend time with my friends. My family. I got moments that would have never come about if you hadn’t decided to show up.” Goku suddenly twisted, managing to get around Raditz and lock his arms around his back and behind his head, fingers lacing together so that the other Saiyan couldn’t move. Raditz snarled and struggled but found himself unable to break the hold. “So I want to thank you for that, Raditz. Thank you for giving me these last 13 months.”

“I’m glad that your final 13 months on this planet were wasted goofing around with these lesser beings, Kakarot!” Raditz snarled as he fought even harder to free himself. But Goku held on fast, refusing to let go. “Those memories can warm you at night when you remember that this planet has been reduced to glass!” He suddenly jerked his head back and Goku was forced to loosen his grip, lest Raditz smash his nose. But that was enough for the Saiyan warrior to be able to slip free and zip away from him, charging up a Ki Blast. “But while you pissed away your time so frivolously I was preparing for this moment! Now witness the might of a Saiyan Warrior, unencumbered by the weak!” Both of his fists began to shine brightly with Ki Energy. “Double Sunday!”

The energy blasts came out of his fists as two large roiling sphere and Goku at once tensed and moved to dodge. But then Raditz suddenly spun on his heels and fired at Chiaotzu and Tien, the two letting out cries as they were struck by the sudden hits.

“No!” Goku called out only for Raditz to at once be in front of him, striking him hard in the stomach before grabbing his Gi and flinging him down into the ground.

“Do you see, Kakarot?” Raditz asked as he walked towards his brother. “Do you understand now? While you wasted your time relaxing I prepared for our battle and thus have grown far beyond you and your pathetic pets. And now you see what a liability they are. How they will only-“

“Destructo Discs!”

Raditz twisted his head up, remembering a second too late that Goku wasn’t the only one in the fight. There, above him, was Krillin, his right hand held up with 5 small little circles, barely bigger than coins, hovering just above his fingers. Raditz smirked at that, raising an eyebrow in contempt and mockery, as Krillin threw out his hand. He didn’t even care that Chichi suddenly blasted past him and grabbed Goku, pulling him out of the way. No, the Saiyan warrior just stood there, raising his arm and swiping at the discs to bat them away-

“AAAAAAAAAAA!”

Raditz screamed as Krillin’s Destructo Discs tore through his hand, ripping it off at the wrist.

“That… was for Yamcha,” Krillin said.

“No,” the Scarred face bandit declared, suddenly appearing in front of Raditz and punching him in the jaw, causing the alien warrior to go flying. “THAT was for me!”

Raditz slowly pulled himself up from the ground only to cry out when Tien slammed down on him, driving him back down into the ground before Roshi rushed him, kicking him towards Piccolo, who caught him before giving him a spin and chucking him into the air, opening his mouth and unleashing a mouth laser that caused him to flip about madly before finally right himself…

…right in front of Kayos, whose hands glowed with the Ki he’s stolen from Raditz’s attacks.

“WHITE KNUCKLE!” he roared before he delivered a Ki-boosted punch right to Raditz’s face. The Saiyan screamed as he slammed down into the ground, slowly getting to his feet clutching at his face, blood dribbling from his cheek while his right wrist was pressed to his chest.

“You still don’t get it,” Goku said, standing with the rest of his friends as they all stared down Raditz. “You think those 13 months made me weak? No… they made me stronger. Because you can’t truly be a great fighter if you have nothing to fight for. You go out just wanting to destroy planets? I fight for my friends. My family. And that will always make me stronger than you.”

Raditz though trembled in rage.

“You think you can belittle me?” he growled. “Mock me… and what I want?” He threw back his head and roared, his energy bursting from his body. “I WILL SHOW YOU MY STRENGTH!”

And with that he rushed them, the Z Fighters moving to intercept.

Chapter Text

Raditz let out a roar as he thrust out his arms wide, sending out a wave of energy in all directions to drive back the Earthlings.

“I have to admit, brother, you have grown stronger!” Raditz raced towards Goku, driving his remaining fist at his brother’s head only for Goku to quickly dodge the blow, twisting in the air before moving to try and kick Radtiz. But it was his turn to avoid the strike, only he managed to grab Goku’s leg and throw him towards the ground. His brother bounced once but then was back on his feet, the little wince he gave being the only sign that he had felt the attack at all. Raditz shook his other arm; while the blast that Krillin had fired had kept his wound from bleeding it still ached fiercely and he would need to have it attended to soon as he could tell it hadn’t actually healed up the wound. “And these pests you have dubbed your friends? They are far more powerful than I had thought.” He fired off several quick KI blasts, trying to knock his brother off his feet, but Goku merely did a few backflips to avoid them, landing in a defensive position once again. “But it won’t be enough!”

“That’s where you’re wrong though, Raditz,” Tien said, suddenly come on the Saiyan warrior, throwing several punches before raising his hand, causing a boulder behind Raditz to lift up and come hurtling at him. The fighter just ducked under it, trying to get it to smash into Tien, but the triclops merely smashed the rock in half before quickly catching the two halves, considering them for a moment before throwing them with all his might right back at Raditz, so fast he wasn’t able to avoid them in time. Raditz grunted as they smashed into him, knocking him back but not wounding him greatly. “We aren’t his friends… we’re his family.”

Raditz snarled at that. “I am his brother! Not you! Kakarot is my blood!”

“Then where have you been these last few decades?” Chiaotzu asked as he suddenly popped up in front of Raditz, using Tien’s Witches Style to double his legs so he could give a flurry of kicks right to Radtiz’s face, smashing his nose and leaving him wobbly. “I think I would have remembered you hanging around, especially with that hair!”

“We are the ones that have been with him!” Krillin declared, having snuck up on Raditz. He delivered a strike to his side before forming a ki blade around his left hand, driving it towards the other fight’s stomach. Raditz though saw the blow coming and quickly spun out of the way. He launched himself back at Krillin, kicks and punches flying wildly. “I trained with him and Yamcha! I watched him grow up into the great man he is now! You don’t get to come here and declare none of that matters just because you have the same parents!”

“You think your pathetic little moments mean anything?” Raditz answered as the two continued to trade blows. He could tell that Krillin was far stronger than he let on, hiding his power level, and he was almost curious on how the little bald human was able to do it. He’d never met another being in the galaxy who had been able to hide their power level so effectively as Krillin. One would almost believe that he had no real power beyond what he was showing but the attack the bald man had used to cut off his hand proved that theory wrong. No… Raditz knew he was strong. And he was holding that power back, reserving it for the right moments.

If he wouldn’t submit though… he would suffer.

“This was just a childish game, living on this world! What I have in store for him will be a true life! A better life!” He suddenly grabbed Krillin’s head, pressing his thumb into the fighter’s eye. Krillin let out a scream of pain and Raditz cackled as he began to dig his digit in harder. He wanted to see the orb pop like a piece of fruit-

A long green arm grabbed him and ripped him away, flinging him across the field.

Before Raditz could react Piccolo was now the one on him, sending a maelstrom of kicks and punches at his body, forcing him to once more go on the defensive.

“Oh yes, what a wonderful life,” Piccolo mocked. “Destruction for the sake of destruction. I want to rule this planet… I at least have plans. Goals. Things I want done beyond ‘blow this up and go get something to eat’. I have spent years thinking about what I will do with Earth. How I will reshape it into my perfect kingdom. You don’t think 2 minutes beyond your actions.” He smirked. “Heh… maybe you are Goku’s brother.”

Raditz snarled, unable to answer as he had to focus on dodging.

“Are you okay, Krillin?” Kayos asked, landing beside him as Piccolo continued to pound on Raditz.

“I’m fine,” Krillin snapped though for once it had nothing to do with feeling annoyed at the blond man. He pressed his hand to his eye, face twisted in pain. “Just give me a minute…”

“No way,” Kayos said, moving to stand in front of Krillin. “Get to Chichi right now. Even if he completely destroyed your eye the senzu bean should be able to heal you up.”

“I canfight-“ Krillin protested again.

“Admit to me right now that you won’t be better off fighting with depth perception,” the mage demanded. Krillin glowered at him but finally turned away to go get to Chichi.

“How are we doing, Isco?” Kayos asked as he watched Piccolo and Raditz trade blows; at some point Piccolo had left himself open for a strike and now the two were going at each other in a back and forth of body blows. Piccolo was unleashing a series of kicks and punches, only for Raditz to suddenly lash out with a single powerful strike that was worth ten of Piccolo’s hits.

Isco, in his upgraded secondary body, hummed to himself.

“Perfect, sir,” Isco stated.

“…I meant all of us when it comes to defeating Raditz, not just you and your survival.”

“Ah, I see,” Isco said, making no move to apologize for misunderstanding. “In that case we are doing well enough. If we-“

“NO!” Kayos snapped, jabbing a finger in Isco’s face. “Do not fucking jinx us or I swear I’ll use the Dragon Balls to wish you into becoming a toilet. One of those fancy ones that shoots water up people’s asses.”

“…point taken, sir,” Isco said.

~MC~MC~MC~

‘He’s stronger than me,’ Piccolo thought in frustration as he sent several more punches at the Saiyan followed by a kick. Raditz had his forearms up, blocking the blows from hitting his face, and was able to duck and weave enough that he couldn’t get a good shot in on his torso. ‘Damn it… even with how hard I trained he is still stronger than I am.’

He had worked as hard as he could to surpass his limits and then surpass what he found beyond that. The 13 months had been dedicated to that. He’d even used the Scroll of Knowledge… though that had been of little help. It had simple informed him that his true strength would come from understanding who he was. Piccolo knew who he was!

Or he had… til he had learned he was no demon at all but an alien. One from a planet he couldn’t even remember.

But that didn’t matter. Understanding himself didn’t matter. All that mattered was growing stronger. To mastering new abilities and finding ways to push himself to new heights. And while he was far more powerful than he had been before the fact remained that he was still weaker than Raditz. Not overly so; Radtiz wouldn’t be able to just run right over him, completely flattening him and giving Piccolo no hope of being able to defeat him. No, Raditz had to treat their fight seriously. But their power levels weren’t the same. Raditz was stronger than him and by a noticeable amount.

‘All I have is my skills,’ Piccolo thought. ‘That is what is going to let me beat this bastard.’

The last 13 months had seen him working on new ways to use his moves. To strike not just harder but in ways that made it impossible to block his blows. That would not just rattle an opponent but give him other benefits as well. Open him up for new assaults, lower defenses, allow him to power up other attacks. Hits on vital nerve clusters. Strikes on weak spots that would ache hours afterwards. Taking out the joints so a foe became slower. He’d known that he wouldn’t be able to win by brute force.

Piccolo smirked.

‘Just how I like it,’ he thought. ‘My father might have liked to just crush someone like Raditz under his boot… but I want to go beyond that. Not just defeat their bodies but their minds and souls as well. Leave them so defeated they know they have no hope of every matching me!’

Raditz suddenly went for a forearm smash and Piccolo… allowed him to do just that.

“HA!” the Saiyan cackled as Piccolo was sent hurtling towards the ground. “Pathetic! You’re like a child beating their hands against a door, demanding it to open! Well I hate to break it to you but I will not be moved.” He snickered. “What am I saying… I am THRILLED to break that too you! No matter what you do you will never be able to overcome me!” Piccolo slammed into the ground, dust kicking up all around him, making it hard for either fighter to see their opponent. “Namekian… a Namekian thought he stood a chance against me! While you do have a bit more of the fighting spirit in you than the rest of your pathetic race there was never any hope of defeating me! Not here! Not on your home planet! Not anywhere! You-“

Piccolo smirked as he locked onto Raditz’s location, sensing his energy.

The Saiyan had thought that he’d managed to knock Piccolo down, leaving him bruised and battered in a crater. But Piccolo had absorbed the blow and allowed it to drive him down before bracing his legs, allowing him to hit the earth hard… but uninjured.

And launch his next attack.

The Special Beam Cannon once took 5 minutes to charge.

He had managed to get it down to seconds.

“DOUBLE SPECIAL BEAM CANNON!”

Two of them required a minute.

From his two index fingers launched out two spiral beams of energy. They cut through the dust cloud and Piccolo smirked as he saw Raditz’s eyes go wide in shock, trying to dodge the attacks but finding himself pinned. Piccolo spun the two beams around the Saiyan warrior, boxing him in before clapping his hands together, bringing the beams together. Raditz screamed beautifully in Piccolo’s opinion as he was hit from the sides and sent flying into the air.

“Heh,” he muttered as he kept track on his foe, waiting til he’d just begun to descend before launching himself up and delivering an axe handle kick to the middle of Raditz’s back, sending him crashing to the ground.

Unlike him… Raditz hadn’t been planning for that.

“Wow!” Goku exclaimed, flying over to him. “That was amazing, Piccolo!”

He smirked at that. He knew it was wrong. He knew that he should hate it. But… he had to admit… hearing Goku praise him always brought a smile to his face.

“If we keep this up then we’re going to defeat him,” Goku said.

“DON’T FUCKING JINX US!” Kayos yelled out to him.

“What does that mean?”

Raditz let out a scream from the crater he was in, the ground buckling under him. He began to launch out ki blasts, Tien and Yamcha both getting hit and sent screaming towards the ground while Piccolo and Goku found the sky filled with glowing death.

Piccolo’s smile fell. “I think it means ‘don’t assume you’ve won until you’ve won’.”

And with that he launched into another assault.

~MC~MC~MC~

“Why don’t you sit down and have something to eat?” Yajirobe asked, reaching over and grabbing another pork bun, stuffing it into his mouth. He took a moment to chew on it before adding, “But only if make some yourself. This is mine.”

“How kind of you,” Isco stated; even with his secondary body fighting he was still able to communicate with the others on the island. The drone just couldn’t power up his body, needing to dedicate those resources to maintaining the link to his fighting form. “You ensure with such kindness that my lofty opinion of humans is well placed.”

“Whatever,” Yajirobe muttered before looking back at Gohan. “Come on kid, your pacing is making me dizzy!”

“I just wish we were out there…” the little boy said nervously, glancing back at Baba who was watching the entire fight in her crystal ball. “We could be helping them. You have magic like Mr. Kayos, Miss Baba-“

“That I do!” the witch declared with a cackle, Gohan having grown so used to that noise that it no longer bothered him. “Far more than your showy little friend Kayos. That boy needs to learn how to be more subtle when it comes to showing off his powers.”

“Heh, like you are subtle?” Yajirobe guffed.

“What did you say, blubber butt?” Baba snapped, glaring at the ronin.

Yajirobe though merely continued to eat his food. “The way you dress and the way you use every witch cliché... you’re the last person that should be talking about subtle!”

Baba merely pressed her lips together before waving her hand and Yajirobe let out a cry when his pork roll turned into a small angry looking pig. He dropped the beast only for it to charge across the table and lunge at him, Yajirobe screaming as he ran as quick as he could, the pig biting at his butt as it chased him out of the room.

“Hmmm… how’s that for subtle?” the fortune teller asked with a huff.

Gohan didn’t say a word as, in his opinion, that hadn’t been really subtle either but he didn’t want to be chased by his food so it was better just to remain silent.

“You can watch your father and his friends fight if you want,” Baba stated, returning to her crystal ball.

“No thanks,” Gohan said, turning and looking across the room. Except it wasn’t walls or ceilings that he saw… his gaze was far further out, past not just the building but the entire island, across the ocean where his parents were. He could sense their energy… and that of Raditz.

And it terrified him how powerful the other Saiyan warrior was.

‘They can do it though…’ he thought to himself. ‘They can defeat Raditz! I just need to have faith!’ He worried his lip though all the same. ‘I… I just wish I was there though to help them. Even though I know that I’d probably just get in the way… I’d feel better if I were there helping mommy and daddy and everyone else.’

~MC~MC~MC~

“I swear I’m going to get pamphlets printed up,” I growled to myself as I watched Goku and Piccolo work to tagteam Raditz. The two of them were working well together… far better than their first fight against him. Back then they truly hadn’t known how to fight together and had relied upon instinct to see them through. Understanding how fighting worked. Like how a drummer and a guitar player could follow sheet music and get into the rhythm. But now, after 13 months of training, they were like bandmates who had been putting on shows for years. They knew what the other was capable of and were able to easily adjust their strikes to help the other. “They are going to explain all about jinxes.”

“Right,” Bulma said, standing next to the small flying car she’d come in. She had remained out of the fight so far, reasoning that it was far wiser for her to remain as a surprise if things began to go bad than to reveal what she’d brought to the party early on and let Raditz adapt.

“I am going to make all of you study them. There will be tests, Bulma. And not pass/fail either. I’m gonna base them on the ones Chichi makes Gohan take. There will be fucking essay questions about how you don’t jinx people!”

She shot me a look. “Are you okay?”

“I’m nervous as fuck, that’s my problem,” I growled as I watched Piccolo suddenly get caught in an arm hold, the Namekian warrior struggling for a moment before Raditz began to kick him repeatedly in the side. Piccolo cried out when Raditz hit him just below the arm pit and the Saiyan, with a smirk, delivered two more blows to that spot before he hurled Piccolo to the ground.

But Raditz wasn’t in the clear and soon he and Goku found themselves having to square off. Goku fired off a ki blast (not the kamehamaha… I had a feeling he was saving that as his final push to defeat his brother) while Raditz launched out a sphere of energy from his remaining hand. Goku’s blast managed to drive away Raditz’s, which had me breathing a touch better… but not by much.

“We’re winning though,” Bulma pointed out. “We’re wearing him down. And Chichi is ready to heal up anyone that gets too injured…” She gestured over at Chichi, who had hurried over to Piccolo to make sure he was okay. All her time making sure Gohan was safe, as well as piecing Goku back together when he pushed himself far too hard, had taught her how to make sure people were ready to get back up. And without needing to drain our senzu beans. Of the 10 we had been given by Korin we had been forced to use only 2 during the 13 months and another now for Krillin’s eye. Otherwise she was focused on other things, such as basic field combat medicine and limited use of Ki sharing, to get the fighters back on their feet.

“NEVER assume a fight is done until the opponent has surrendered… and sometimes not even then.”

Bulma waved me off. “You’re just being pessimistic! We have this in the bag! Nothing can-“

“BULMA!” I roared

“-go wrong!”

She looked to her right and then her left before once more focusing on me.

“See? Nothing happened. No jinx.”

Raditz and Goku collided in mid-air, fingers wrapping around each others’ as the struggled to push one another back. Goku’s other hand had grabbed onto Raditz’ wrist, keeping his arm from doing down on his head.

“So, this is your strength then, brother?” Raditz taunted, pressing his forehead against Goku’s so that they could whisper to each other and still be heard. He wore a vicious grin, all teeth and plenty of bite to his words. “I see now why you need to rely upon these cheap tricks.”

“Cheap tricks?” Goku asked.

“Aw fuck,” I muttered, my stomach sinking.

Raditz chuckled even as he worked to push Goku back. “Of course… you have no hope of defeating me so you call upon these pathetic Earthlings to distract me, getting in pathetic little strikes to try and soften me up so you can make it seem like you actually defeated me when you fire off a single final blow. Pathetic brother… you truly have no Saiyan pride.”

“No no no no no…” I began to repeat.

Goku… broke off from Raditz.

“Is that so?” he asked.

“No! No! No!” I screamed.

“I guess you’re- now Yamcha!”

“What?” Raditz said only for Yamcha to come barreling into him, slamming his fist right into Raditz’ chin and causing his body to jerk upward.

“WOLF FANG BITE!” Yamcha roared as he surrounded both his hands with Ki. He slammed them both together, fingers curling inward, and caught Raditz in the middle like the claws of a crab. The Saiyan let out a gasp before Yamcha hurled him away. That was perfect for Tien, who had come sweeping in, as it allowed him to give a side kick right to Raditz’s head, causing him to go flying sidewise… just in time for Krillin, healed up by Chichi and ready for action, to come hurtling at him and send him crashing down into the ground.

“You were saying?” Bulma asked with a smirk.

I didn’t have time to celebrate being wrong as Raditz was already pulling himself to his feet. “You… you won’t-“

“Black Parade!” I shouted, sending out my shadow clones which crashed into Raditz, causing his body to flail about as he was hit multiple times. I was already moving as soon as I performed the spell, Piccolo’s suggestion to keep on the run while performing Black Parade a good on and something I had adopted. “Black Parade!” I called out again and once more I sent out another set on magical constructs; while not as strong as the first set, because of the lack of wait time between the two spells, it was enough to leave Raditz a bit battered and dazed, unable to track exactly where I was and unable to focus on the location of everyone on the battle field.

Which was perfect for what was coming next.

Goku landed on the ground and pulled his arms back. “Ka…me…ha…ma… ha!” He thrust out his hands and the blue energy beam blasted from his palms, striking the dazed Saiyan full on. Raditz let out a scream as he was hit, disappearing in the brilliant light of the beam, and it was only when Goku finally finished the attack that he became visible again, teetering on his feet and glassy-eyed. It was a testament to his strength that he was still alive, let alone still on his feet, but there he was… wobbly, perhaps, but on his feet still.

“That’s what you still don’t get, Raditz,” Goku said as he walked towards his brother, the rest of us slowly moving to stand behind him, ready to attack again if needed. “You keep thinking that it makes me weak to rely upon others. But it doesn’t… it makes me strong. A year ago you might have convinced me that the only way to prove one’s self was for the two of us to fight, one on one. Test ourselves against one another. Nothing else interfering. My friends watching as I took you on all alone. But that’s not me. Not anymore. My family and I… we will always work together. Fight to protect our home. We are at our strongest together. And nothing you say, no scorn or insults, will change my mind.”

Goku reached out and flicked Raditz’s head, causing his brother to pitch back and fall to the ground.

“WOOHOO!” Krillin proclaimed, thrusting a fist into the air.

“We did it!” Yamcha cheered. “We defeated Raditz!”

“Hmmm… like there was any doubt,” Piccolo said, folding his arms over his chest. But even with his little comment I could tell he was pleased with the outcome and rather proud.

“Is it over?” Chiaotzu asked, floating up from behind Tien. “Is it really over?”

“Well…” Bulma said, looking down at Raditz, “…I’ll need to figure out a way to restrain him so he can’t cause any more trouble for us but yeah… I think its over.”

“Killing him would solve that quick enough,” Piccolo commented only to earn glares from the others.

“We are NOT killing him!” Krillin declared. “We don’t do that.”

I rolled my eyes. “Yes, because King Piccolo was defeated with a hug and that is why he is now retired and living in Florida.”

“Of course you’d say that,” Krillin grumped. “You probably are… I don’t know… thinking about how to skin him and make him into a coat.”

“I was going to suggest we shave his head and donate the hair to you Krillin but hey, you don’t want it…”

Krillin growled before shouting, “I shave my head!” He flailed his arms about and I merely raised an eyebrow.

“…and?”

Krillin glowered at me; frankly I was done trying to make nice with him. Everyone else had realized I was an ally and I was tired of dealing with his jabs because of a single comment… which had been a DAMN GOOD POINT!

He wanted to spar with me verbally? Fine.

“Nothing about Chiatozu and Tien? No insults towards them?” he asked.

“They pull it off,” I commented, making a clicking noise and winking at them. Tien merely raised an eyebrow at that and Chiaotzu ducked down with a yelp.

“We still need to figure out how to deal with Raditz,” Chichi commented. “Restraint or imprisonment.”

“There… is no need… for that,” Raditz groaned out, slowly rolling onto his belly. We all tensed as he slowly pushed himself to his hands and knees.

“I don’t think he’s talking about a wig…” Bulma whispered as Raditz dragged himself over to Goku.

“You… defeated me brother.” He looked up at him, eyes still filled with defiant fire. But there was something else there… an acceptance that spoke of a pride that refused to be doused no matter what was done to try and remove its flames. “But there was no honor in it. You didn’t defeat me on your own. I will… never submit to you.”

“Submit?” Goku asked, tilting his head in confusion. “What do you mean?”

“It doesn’t matter,” Radtiz ground out. “Kill me and be done with it. Because I swear to you, brother… if you leave me alive I will escape any prison you put me in. And I will use my time to get stronger… and fight you again. I will force you to submit. Through my strength.”

Knowing I needed to speak up before Goku got any ideas in his head (he might have avoided the first challenge to single combat but I couldn’t trust him to not leap at it a second time) I stepped forward. “Raditz… why wasn’t it honorable for Goku to have us help him?”

“Because… it wasn’t.”

“Why not?” I pressed.

“A human would never understand. I have seen much of your kind… researched your planet these last 13 months. You are an honorless and savage species with no concept of the greater universe.”

“Try me,” I challenged.

Raditz considered me for a long moment and I began to worry that he wouldn’t explain. That he would remain silent and not give me the opening I needed to try and get him to understand. Because I knew exactly what he was thinking. I understood his point perfectly. But I needed him to vocalize it.

“A warrior… a true warrior… fights his battles alone. He couldn’t defeat me on his own so he had to rely upon all of you. That shows he has no honor.”

“Raditz…” Goku began but I held up my hand.

“Why aren’t you naked?”

That caused Raditz to start. “W…what?”

“Why are you wearing clothing right now?” I asked. “And this armor. Unless you made it on your own. Did you?”

“Of… of course not,” he got out, the last word ending in a harsh cough. “You take me for a weak seamstress? I am a warrior-“

“So you got help,” I pointed out. “That weak seamstress helped you fight.”

“Its not the same,” Raditz glowered, glaring at me with enough fire in his eyes that I was growing a bit nervous. Still though I pushed on, understanding that this might be my best chance to get him to see reason and stand down.

“Isn’t it?” I asked. “Your kicks are worse with your boots on than if you were barefoot. Your armor protects you and makes Goku and all the rest of us have to send out stronger strikes. You might want to think you fought alone but you didn’t, Raditz.”

“I did this all on my own,” he said darkly, eyes narrowed at the perceived notion that he was weak.

“Oh really?” Master Roshi said, speaking up. “So you are telling me you learned how to do that over shoulder reversal all on your own?” Raditz just continued to stare at us… but he didn’t say a word to protest Roshi’s comment. “You had someone teach you didn’t you? Show you how to fight. You might know NOW how to fight but you didn’t know it the moment you were born. Someone took their time to show ya how to throw a punch. How to block a hit. All of that. You are the product of their lessons. Don’t go dishonoring them by claiming that you did it all on your own with no one else’s help.”

“We do nothing on our own,” Tien commented. “We learn from others. Get help from others. That is the way life is.”

Piccolo shifted and I stopped myself from saying anything, knowing he had something to add. “I get it… you think that relying upon others makes you weak. I used to think the same way. My father drilled it into my head from the moment I came into being that I had to do things on my own. That I couldn’t rely on anyone but myself.” He let out an annoyed huff. “He was the same one who constantly had his minions fight for him, to soften up his foes and deal with the weaklings that he didn’t want to dirty his hands with.”

“And in the end he died… alone,” I said. “Because that is the thing, Raditz… the only thing you can truly do alone is die.”

“You… you expect me to believe that you will forget all I did to all of you?” Raditz demanded. “How I hurt you. Threatened you? Tried to kill you?”

“Please,” Bulma said with a roll of her eyes, “do you realize how many of us have tried to kill Goku?”

Raditz… blinked in surprise at that.

“Shot him,” Bulma pointed out.

“Tried to reduce him to dust,” Piccolo commented, sounding still a bit annoyed that he hadn’t actually managed to do that.

Tien and Chiaotzu merely shrugged while Yamcha weakly rubbed the back of his head.

“I didn’t mean to but looking back on it some of my sabotage might have killed him,” Krillin admitted.

“I did use a few attacks that should have killed him…” Roshi said, rubbing his chin in thought.

“…I know we are trying to make a point,” I said, shooting a side-eyed glance at the others, “but we are having a LONG discussion about killing Goku!”

“Said the guy that wants to poison him,” Krillin muttered.

Chichi rolled her eyes at that before looking at Raditz. “The point is that Goku is able to forgive very easily… and so can the rest of us.”

Goku smiled, reaching down his hand towards his brother. “So… what do you say?”

Raditz considered the extended hand for a long moment.

“Heh,” he said with a shake of his head. “Maybe you are more Saiyan than I thought.” He lowered his eyes and said in a solemn voice, “I recognize your strength, Kakatrot. You are my better… I am yours to command.”

Only then did he take Goku’s hand and allow his brother to haul him to his feet.

“So… that’s it then?” Yamcha asked. “Its all over. No trying to destroy the planet?”

“You’d have to ask Kakarot,” Raditz declared, wincing as he rolled his shoulders. Now that he was up we could all see that he had cuts and burns all over his body from the different attacks we’d thrown at him.

“Oh no, we couldn’t do that! Earth is far too great to destroy!” He wrapped his arm around Raditz and gave his brother a hard shake. “Wait till you try out all the food we have here! You’re going to wonder why you ever considered blowing it up when you sample the dumplings!”

“He might need some medical care before that, Goku,” I pointed out. “Isco, find Raditz’ hand, would you? If we hurry we can hopefully reattach it…”

“Worse case we burn a wish,” Bulma said before her eyes went wide, her hands going to her mouth.

Thankfully Raditz hadn’t noticed her slip up and thus didn’t comment on it. He was far too focused on Goku.

“But… what else do you want me to do?”

Goku frowned. “Well… I want you to get all healed up! And then we can probably begin training together… some of those moves you have are amazing and I’d love to learn them!”

Raditz just stared at his brother for a long time, utterly silent.

“What?” Goku finally said, tilting his head in confusion.

“That’s… all you desire?” Raditz asked, utterly baffled by his brother’s comments. “You just want to eat and train and spend time with these humans?”

“Well… yeah!” Goku shut his eyes and beamed, rubbing the back of his head. “I mean, what else would I want?”

His brother waved his good hand around rapidly. “Look at the group you have gathered, brother! With me aiding you would could take control of this planet! Rule it!”

“…well, I guess,” Goku said with a shrug. “I just don’t see the need to.”

“You… don’t see… the need to?”

Piccolo was the one, surprisingly, who spoke up. “What do you get out of being a ruler?” The others stared at him and he folded his arms over his chest. “Its just a waste of time dealing with the humans that call his mudball home. So much better to just have a peaceful life.”

“Piccolo is right!” Goku declared. “I mean… I have everything I could ever want! What would ruling Earth give me?”

Raditz opened his mouth only to click it shut.

“That’s the thing about power,” I said, “you race after it… wanting to claim it… but then when you get it you find that the things that made it so attractive no longer shine like they did.”

To my surprise though Raditz shot me a dark look. “I wasn’t seeking my brother out to rule. I was seeking him out to make right the crimes against the Saiyan race!”

Now it was my turn to stare at him in shock. ‘Does… does he know? Could he know that-‘

“Do you wonder why you were left here all by yourself, brother? Why no one ever came to collect you? Its because there was no one left. You are part of a nearly dead race, Kakarot. The Saiyans, once the mightiest and most feared warriors in all the universe, have been reduced to a handful, slaving away under the tyrant that slaughter our entire race… including out father.”

“Our… our father?” Goku asked, utterly shocked by what he was hearing.

“Yes… our father, the great Saiyan Warrior Bardock. He alone realized what was about to happen to Planet Vegeta and sought out to stop Lord Frieza from destroying the planet. He died attempting to prevent that bastard from wiping us all out.” Raditz curled his remaining hand into a fist. “I came to find you so we could work together to kill Frieza and avenge our race!”

“Well… why didn’t you say so!” Goku exclaimed before narrowing his own eyes, a smirk forming on his lips. “If this Frieza is as bad as you claim he is of course I’ll help take him down.”

Raditz locked eyes with Goku before reaching out, the brothers clapping their hands together, forearms straining as they put their all into the handshake. “We have a long way to go then, Kakarot… but together we can defeat this Frieza.”

“Not just you two,” Bulma said firmly.

“We can handle this, human,” Raditz said dismissively only for Yamcha to cut him off.

“No way! You think we’re going to stand back and let Goku risk himself? If this Frieza guy killed his dad then all of us have a beef with him.” The others all chimed in their agreement to go face Frieza while I… kept my fucking mouth shut.

‘Going to have to nip this in the bud,’ I thought to myself. ‘We did well against Raditz but that’s only because we all worked together, overwhelming him. One on one fights? He would have destroyed any of us with just a few strikes. Goku and Piccolo are the only ones that would have stood a chance against him and even then I wouldn’t want to put money on them getting a solid win against him. Frieza… Frieza isn’t a foe we can take on. He’s a natural disaster. Maybe after another few years of training… hmm…’ I narrowed my eyes. ‘Maybe make a wish on the Dragon Balls to hide Earth from him? Make it so he can’t learn of it? Sure, it means other planets will be attacked by him but so long as Raditz never reveals to them the Dragon Balls Namek would be safe. Maybe find a way to warn them though, suggest that they hide Namek as well.’

‘Hmmm… interesting suggestions,’ Kami said, making my eyes go wide in shock. I looked around but saw that the others were telling Raditz how wonderful Earth was, trying to convince him that this was the best and smartest decision he’d ever made. ‘Though it does make me wonder how you know all of this, Avo Kayos. Including things about my race that even I don’t know.’

Realizing that I had no way out of this, that I was dealing with a character that until Power Creep was basically the God of the Dragon Ball World for a while, I went with the only option left to me: Honesty.

‘My name isn’t Avo Kayos. My name is Kevin… and I am from a world where all of this, everything that is happening, was a fictional story. The tales of Goku and his friends were known by millions. I don’t know how I ended up here but I promise that I am just trying to help-‘

‘I know,’ Kami said, cutting me off. ‘I can sense that your heart is in the right place and you desire to help your friends.’

‘Thank you.’

‘That does not mean we do not need to discuss your knowledge. What you know is dangerous, Avo Kayos, and must be carefully guarded.’

‘I know,’ I replied. ‘Its why I chose not to say a word to the gang. Besides, I have already altered much. Goku was supposed to be the one who died when Raditz first appeared, with him also falling as well. Now Raditz is alive and might actually learn how to work with his brother and it is Yamcha who learned from King Kai.’ I let out a mental sigh. ‘It’s a risk… but I’m willing to take it. The gang is overall far stronger than they were in what I remember. Goku might not be quite as powerful as he was but Krillin? Tien? Chiaotzu? They are far more ready for the dangers that might come.’

Kami remained silent.

‘I know you believe that Goku is our best hope,’ I continued. ‘And yes, he is a great hero. But I think he can be an even stronger one with his friends able to stand with him, rather than simply remaining on the sidelines, waiting to see what happens next. If he doesn’t have the weight of the world constantly pressing down on him I think he can lead a better and more fulfilling life.’ I shook my head, glancing at Goku who was laughing about something, Raditiz merely glowering at his brother but making no move to remove the arm that Goku had slung over his shoulder.

Kami remained silent.

‘And I know that there are risks to me using my knowledge to try and help them. I could make things worse… or there is the Escalation Issue. They grow stronger so their enemies grow even stronger as a result. Foes that they should meet years from now appear at this time, when they aren’t ready. Attracted by their strength. I know that but I truly believe that this is better for all of us.’

Kami remained silent.

‘…are you even still there?’ I asked, wondering if I was just thinking to myself.

‘I am,’ Kami responded. ‘I…’

He trailed off… and I got the feeling it wasn’t because of what I’d said.

~MC~MC~MC~

“Kami, are you okay?” Mr. Popo said, walking over to the guardian. He was standing at the edge of the lookout, gripping his staff tightly in his wrinkled hands. But what was most concerning to Mr. Popo was how Kami wasn’t looking down on the Earth, where he knew that Goku and his friends were dealing with Raditz.

Instead… he was looking upward. To the sky.

“Kayos…” Kami said slowly, eyes piercing through the blue sky above them, “tell me… of what you have seen of our world… did more Saiyans ever come to Earth?”

‘…oh fuck,’ Kayos whispered in Kami and, because he had placed his hand on his arm, Mr. Popo’s minds.

“What is coming?” Kami asked sternly.

‘Two Saiyans… far more powerful than Raditz. Kami, how much time-‘

“Not long. A few minutes at most.”

‘Fuck!’ Kayos cursed.

“Kami?” Mr. Popo asked. “What should we do?” He knew that Raditz was strong… far more powerful that Piccolo and Goku and certainly more powerful than Kami himself. If these two approaching Saiyans were as powerful as Kayos feared…

“We pray,” Kami whispered. “We pray that Goku and his friends are strong enough… for what they are about to face.”

~MC~MC~MC~

“Break it up!” Kayos roared. “Break it up! Who needs to be healed? Can a senzu bean regrow a lost limb?”

“Well… I guess,” Goku said, blinking. “But I thought you wanted us to reattach Raditz’ hand. Not that I mind… if I could just have a hand regrow I would-“

“Chichi, senzu Raditz, now!” Kayos snapped.

But Chichi merely narrowed her eyes. “Why would I do that? I thought we were saving them for emergencies?”

“This IS an emergency,” Kayos said, looking up at the sky.

Raditz… paled.

“No… no no no!” he shouted. “We aren’t ready for them!”

“Whoa, what’s the matter” Goku asked… only to follow his brother’s gaze and suddenly shiver in shock. “WHAT IS THAT?!?” he exclaimed.

The other Z Fighters looked up and began to tense as well.

“Those power levels…” Piccolo whispered. “They’re massive!”

“I’ve never felt something that strong!” Yamcha declared.

“That… that can’t be right.”

“It is,” Kayos said and Chichi hurriedly pulled out a senzu bean and tossed it to Raditz. The Saiyan stared at it for a moment but the two approaching energy signatures caused him to at once plop the bean in his mouth.

“Ugh… not even cooked properly,” he muttered. “Tastes like fish… wha?” His eyes went wide and he watched as his stump twitched and trembled before a new hand burst out of his wrist. “I… I feel amazing.” He flexed his arm. “Back up to full strength!”

“Good,” Goku said, smile gone and face grim, “because I think you’re gonna need it.”

“Kayos…” Bulma murmured, “what is going on?”

“Two more Saiyans,” he said. “More powerful than all of us. Get ready… there won’t be spectators in this fight.”

Bulma swallowed at that but ran towards her flying vehicle to get what she needed.

“Sir,” Isco stated, “should I worry that you are downplaying the situation?”

“Yeah… you really should.”

“Bugger.”

The Z Fighters could only stand ready and prepared as two more Saiyan pods lowered down to the ground, hitting the earth with a boom and making small craters.

“Give no quarter,” Raditz warned everyone. “They won’t be willing to listen to reason or cut deals like I was.”

“I can’t believe Raditz was the calm and rational one,” Krillin muttered.

The two pods slowly opened.

“Well…” the shorter of the two declared as he stepped out, “what do we have-“

“BLACK PARADE!” Kayos roared, launching out his magical attack.

The Z Fighters, as one, launched themselves at the two new arrivals before they could say another word.

Chapter Text

“What did you find here, Raditz?” Vegeta taunted as he easily floated away from the other Saiyan. He didn’t even bother to move a muscle, instead merely dodging by shifting his body one way or another to avoid the blows the enraged low-class wretch was tossing his way. “Did you spend all your time training up some pets? I must admit they are interesting… the Namekian is a good touch as is the triclops… but we have other matters to see to.”

“They aren’t my pets!” Raditz snarled as he drove his fist right at Vegeta’s face. The Prince of all Saiyans though merely sighed, moving so quickly out of the way that he created an afterimage that Raditz didn’t even realize wasn’t him until he’d already tried to strike it. “And I spent these last 13 months growing stronger!”

“Oh, I can tell that!” Vegeta said smugly. “But a flea with a bit more kick… is still a flea.”

Raditz snarled and charged up his hands. “Double Sunday!” he roared, unleashing the ki blasts. But Vegeta merely scoffed before he began to twist and turn, avoiding every launched attack.

“Really now, Raditz, there is no need to waste your energy on this meaningless display. We both know how it is going to go.” Vegeta shook his head before finally launching himself forward, driving his fist into Raditz’ stomach. “With you on your hands and knees.”

“No…” Raditz said and Vegeta quirked an eyebrow when the low class warrior didn’t crumple from the strike. Instead Raditz merely took the blow, remained standing tall, before reaching down and grabbing Vegeta’s wrist, slowly forcing the Prince’s arm back. “Not this time.” He moved to twist it but Vegeta quickly spun out of the hold, launching himself away from the other warrior. “This time… I finally set things right.” Raditz pointed right at Vegeta. “You think that you are worthy of leading us because your father was king? No… you are the least of us, Vegeta. A lazy spoiled brat who has had everything handed to you! If it weren’t for me and Nappa you would have been dead before you even hit puberty! Well… no more. Not again. This is the day where I show you my true might!”

Vegeta though merely chuckled. “Oh… is that what were are doing here. Raditz thinks that he has earned the right to lead and so comes after me? That’d be amusing… if it weren’t so pathetic.”

“At least I’m going to earn it… unlike you who only has your position because you lick Frieza’s feet.”

Vegeta’s good mood fell away in an instant at the reminder that for his lofty title and great strength that made him a prodigy even amongst the mighty Saiyan race… he was still just a minion under the control of Frieza.

“Well then,” he said darkly, “I suppose I need to-“

His head snapped back a cut forming on his cheek. He slowly turned his head, staring at the short bald human who had several more ki discs hovering just above his fingertips.

“I think my lessons to you about your place will have to wait, Raditz. I need to teach your pet a lesson.” And with that Vegeta blasted away from Raditz, zeroing in on the human that had dared to attack him. ‘I will give the little mongrel this… he is brave.’ The bald fighter hadn’t moved, hadn’t even flinched, when Vegeta had changed course and made his way right at him. ‘But bravery will get you no where, human. You would have been better off groveling… I might have made this quick!’ He swung his leg out suddenly, hitting the warrior square in the side and causing him to cry out in pain. Vegeta smirked as he then moved in to drive his fist into his ribs from the other side, hoping to collapse bout halves of his ribcage and leaving him a moaning wreck. But the bald warrior suddenly thrust out his hand and Vegeta hissed in pain as the small ki discs slashed his arm, doing just enough damage to cause him to miss his strike.

Vegeta pulled back and looked over his fingers. His gloves had been cut and there were small gashes on his fingertips but otherwise they were fine. He smirked as he looked over at the bald warrior, who was still in a fighting stance.

“Well now,” he said in a low, bemused voice, “that was rather pathetic. You didn’t even manage to take off a single finger. And here I thought you earthlings knew how to fight from your brief showing, considering you had Raditz teaching you. Though I do suppose he was always lacking as an instructor. Don’t worry though-“

Vegeta suddenly lunged out, chopping his arm down and taking out the bald warrior’s left leg just below the knee, sending the appendage crashing down to the ground below. The human screamed in pain, clutching at his leg while Vegeta shifted away.

“-I’ll show you how a true warrior fights.” He slowly slid his eyes back towards Raditz. “But first… I think I should return to your master.”

And with that he charged.

~MC~MC~MC~

“Krillin!” Yamcha cried out when he heard his friend cry out in pain.

“Go!” Piccolo shouted, realizing that Yamcha wouldn’t be able to focus on the fight if he was worried about Krillin. “We got this!”

“Heh, you think you can handle me?” Nappa taunted as he cracked his knuckles, Piccolo merely narrowing his eyes. “Raditz’ pathetic brother couldn’t take me down and you think you have a shot, Namekian?”

Piccolo didn’t even bother to look over at Goku, who had taken a nasty hit and was being seen to by Tien. Chichi was heading over to Krillin while Kayos…

‘Where is that bastard, anyway?’ Piccolo thought, annoyed. ‘He moved to hit them first and now he’s disappeared. I doubt he’s run off… he better be preparing something big because otherwise there is going to be hell to pay.’

“So,” Roshi said, the only fighter left with Piccolo, “ya think because ya got a single strong hit in that means that ya can win the entire day? I don’t know who your teacher was but he wasn’t worth his salt!”

Nappa’s eyebrow twitched at that, jaw clenching at Roshi’s words. “I was taught to fight by King Vegeta himself!” He suddenly rushed forward, Roshi just managing to dodge the blow that cracked the earth and left a crater nearly 5 feet deep. “The greatest fighter the universe has ever seen!” He swung another punch but Roshi dodged again, allowing Piccolo to go in and try and hit Nappa from behind. But the large Saiyan merely twisted around and delivered an elbow to Piccolo’s gut, causing him to gasp in pain. “You know what he would have done to a weak Namekian like you?” he taunted before grabbing Piccolo by the back of the head and slamming him down into the ground. “He wouldn’t have been as gentle as I am being!” He lifted Piccolo up and slammed him down again.

“So he was a foolish bruiser too,” Roshi taunted and Piccolo grunted as Nappa just dropped him before turning to face Roshi. “If he had been any sort of teacher he would have made sure you knew that bulking yourself up like that isn’t a good idea.” Roshi looked over his own muscles before smirking and shifting his body muscle. He was still muscular but instead the strength was redirected to his legs, making them thick and corded with hard toned muscle. “Because a warrior that can’t dodge is nothing.”

Nappa let out a scream at that. “DIE!” he roared as he thundered across the ground only for Roshi to dodge him again.

“Your footwork is bad,” Roshi commented. “And you don’t know how to plant yourself properly.” He suddenly lashed out and struck Nappa right on the ear

“I’ll plant you right into a grave!”

Piccolo thrust out his hand and fired a ki blast that struck Nappa right in the back sending him toppling forward. Roshi was ready for that, driving his knee right into the bruiser’s face.

“You’re insults are lacking too.”

“You okay, Piccolo?” Goku asked, hurrying over to him.

“Fine,” Piccolo said, getting up and cracking his neck. “I’ve had far worse.”

“Yeah… but that doesn’t mean these guys aren’t strong,” Tien commented, Chiaotzu floating beside him.

“Goku, I think you should go help your brother,” Piccolo said, “we can handle Nappa.”

“Right!” Goku said before rocketing up into the air, heading towards where Raditz and Vegeta were battling.

“So,” Tien said, “any strategies?”

“He’s big and tough,” Piccolo said, touching his cheek and wincing as he felt how tender it was. “He likes to fight close… but he’s slow. If you are able to dodge that will help.”

“Right,” Tien said before looking at Chiaotzu. “I think this might be your fight.”

“Alright!” Chiaotzu said with a determined nod as the two of them began to glow. “Keep feeding me energy… here I go!” With that Chiaotzu blasted at Nappa while Piccolo moved in at a quick pace… though not as quick as Chiaotzu, who came at Nappa like a little missile, driving into his belly just as he had been preparing to lash out at Master Roshi. The bald Saiyan grunted in pain when Chiaotzu hit, forcing him back and allowing Piccolo to take over for the old human.

“Oh, so there are more of you that want to be torn apart!” Nappa taunted as he ran his forearm over his mouth. “So be it!” He leapt up before driving himself down, Piccolo and Chiaotzu just managing to evade the attack. “The longer to prolong your deaths the worst they are going to be!”

‘We might have a strategy… and we’ve gotten a few good hits in… but that doesn’t mean we’ve actually succeeded in making a dent in this guy. Its like fighting a brick wall… you take out a chunk but the rest of it is still standing! We might be able to overwhelm him… but every second that goes by just means he has a greater chance to really hurting one of us. The only question is who…’

~MC~MC~MC~

“And you are sure you are okay, Krillin?” Chichi asked as she focused some Ki upon his leg. It was a technique she had picked up when Gohan had sprained his wrist and Goku had become so stressed by his son’s cries of pain he’d tried to raid the senzu bean stash just to heal him up. She was sending Ki to dampen the nerves around the wound, muffling and muting them so that they weren’t firing off. It allowed someone to continue on without feeling the pain, much like a shot of Novocain when the dentist removed a tooth.

She hadn’t thought she’d need to use it in the midst of a battle but she was thankful for it all the same.

“I’m fine,” Krillin grunted out, jaw slowly unclenching. “Just glad he went for my leg instead of my arm. I can still fight at least.”

“Maybe you should stay out of this…” Chichi said only for Krillin to shake his head.

“No way! I’m not letting that bastard hurt anyone else!”

“But he already hurt you-“ she said only to be cut off. Not by Krillin… but by Goku, who can flying in and delivered a Ki-charged fist to Vegeta’s face, smashing him away from Raditz.

“If you think I’m going to let you get away with hurting my brothers you are mistake.”

“Brothers?” Vegeta asked as he came to a stop, hovering in the air. “Oh Raditz, have you been hiding more of your low-class filth family on this planet?”

“Krillin is my brother,” Goku declared. “So are Yamcha and Tien and Chiaotzu. Kayos and even Piccolo! And I won’t let you hurt any of them.” He fell into his standard fighting stance.

“Aw, how adorable. You’ve grown to love these pathetic humans!” Vegeta lifted up a glowing hand. “Then I suppose it would be devastating if I were to vaporize them!”

“MOVE!” Krillin shouted, grabbing Chichi and blasting off just as Vegeta fired a blast of energy right at where they had been moments earlier.

“Oh, look at them go!” Vegeta mocked dodging a kick Goku sent his way before suddenly lashing out his hand and catching Goku by the throat. Raditz moved in to try and intercept but Vegeta merely swung Goku around, driving his head into his brother’s, causing the older of the two Saiyans to crash to the ground, moaning. “This is rather entertaining!” Vegeta said, still holding Goku by the throat as he began to fire on Chichi and Krillin, the two having to evade the blasts lest they be torn apart by the energy. “And who is that female down there? A sister? I must admit she looks strong… it has been a while since I encountered a female of any species that might be able to survive a single round with me-“

“THAT IS MY WIFE!” Goku suddenly roared, his aura bursting out as he drove Vegeta away from him. With a growl Goku slammed into the Saiyan Prince, delivering a flurry of punches and kicks that Vegeta was forced to actually counter and intercept.

“Did I touch a nerve?” Vegeta taunted. “I’m sorry… tell you what! I’ll just kill you both nice and quick!” With that he caught Goku by the wrist and hurled him at Chichi, who reacted on instinct and caught him. She looked up to see Vegeta charging up a blast of energy, one that had every instinct in Chichi’s brain screaming DOOM DOOM DOOM. “And if you are worried about your friends… I’ll send them to whatever hell this planet has real soon.”

Goku tensed, drawing forth his own Ki to prepare to fire off his own blast of energy.

Only to stop… when he heard an engine roar.

Chichi turned in time to see something she’d NEVER encountered rocket right at Vegeta.

It was nearly 8 feet tall, made of dull white and blue… well, it looked like plastic but she could tell even from a glance that it was FAR more durable and powerful than that, whatever the material might be. It was vaguely shaped like a person, with two arms and two legs but no one would ever mistake it for a person walking down the street. What ‘head’ the thing had was just a small sunken protrusion that sat upon the chest. The hands were cylinders with three pincer-like fingers. The feet were tank treads. It was a machine, one built for combat.

And it had the Capsule Corps Logo right on it.

“Not if I send you first!” Bulma’s voice roared out from speakers on the mech as she slammed into the startled Vegeta, causing his blast to go wide.

“Whoa!” Krillin exclaimed, eyes wide in shock as he stared at their friend. “What is THAT thing?”

“Huh… I guess that’s what she’s been working on at her lab!” Goku said.

Raditz pushed himself up from the ground, finally working himself out of his daze. “She’s going to need more than that tin can to take down Vegeta-“

The arm cylinders on Bulma’s mech lit up before twin bursts of electricity blasted right at the Saiyan Prince, causing him to scream as his body seized up.

Raditz slowly turned to stare at his brother.

“Yeah… that’s my sister.”

“I’m beginning to understand your love for this planet,” Raditz admitted.

“Good, because there is so much to show you! The food alone-“

“Talk later, fight now!” Krillin said before blasting off, realizing that while Bulma was hurting Vegeta she wouldn’t be able to hold him forever.

“Right!” Goku said and the Saiyan brothers rocketed off to take on Vegeta again.

~MC~MC~MC~

“Well, this certainly isn’t good,” Baba muttered as she watched the two newly arrived Saiyans rampage through the others. Gohan glanced at her before turning back towards his spot, extending his senses to try and feel his parents’ energy. Just watching them wasn’t good enough… he needed to be able to sense their energy. To know they were still fighting. Still okay.

For the last year he had spent nearly every moment around his parents and his newly discovered aunt and uncles. And one of the very first things he’d been taught was how to sense energy… and he had practiced it heavily. He liked knowing where everyone was, that they were close and safe. It made him breathe easier and his training go by quicker even when he was doing the really boring parts. Now, having them not there… it was like he had gone outside on a cold day only to find himself with no clothes on.

Watching on viewing ball… that didn’t comfort him.

Feeling his family did.

Uncle Krillin and how he had to dig really hard to feel him but when he did it was clear there was so much power there. Mr. Piccolo who seemed cold at first but the longer he spent sensing him the warmer he got, like a stove slowly heating up before his mommy made treats. Uncle Tien and Uncle Chiaotzu, who were so different yet always seemed to be bouncing around each other, connected by a thick piece of rope. Grandpa Roshi (who blushed and stammered the first time Gohan had called him that) who was so old but also so stable that he felt like a rock Gohan could cling too when he was scared. Aunt Bulma who was so smart but always took the time to explain just what she was doing. He hadn’t spent much time at all with Mr. Yamcha but he really hoped to. He wanted to learn about him as well and what he was like. Mr. Kayos (who was very close to being an uncle) was the hardest to sense but that was okay because he did such amazing things with him magic!

And then there were his mommy and daddy.

Sometimes, late at night, he’d just lie in his bed and sense their power. It was like they were right there with him.

Gohan shut his eyes and focused.

‘Please… let them all be okay. Let them all come home…’

~MC~MC~MC~

Chiatozu fired off a ki blast that had Nappa snarling, bits of his armor cracking from the strike. Tien smirked at that before focusing on gathering up more energy and sending it Chiaotzu’s way. Their strategy of allowing him to take on Nappa due to his smaller size and great nimbleness was working perfectly; they were wearing the bruiser down. Slowly but surely they were beating down his defenses, allowing Piccolo and Roshi to catch their breath.

“Come here you little pipsqueak!” Nappa snarled.

“That’s a big word coming from you!” Chiaotzu taunted. “Did it hurt your brain thinking it up?”

Nappa let out a roar and swung a fist right at Chiaotzu’s head but he was already out of the way, able to fire a small blast of ki at Nappa’s already bruised eye. The Saiyan warrior stumbled back and that was Piccolo’s chance to jump back into the fray, lashing out with a strong right hook that had the bald Saiyan spinning. He moved in with another jab, that one aimed for Nappa’s stomach.

‘We are beating him back… but its taking too long,’ Tien thought as Master Roshi unleashed what Tien would almost call a single-hand Kamehameha. Nappa was able to avoid the strike though and finally ignited his hands with Ki, lashing out with two violent strikes that caught Chiaotzu when he moved in to try and go for his eyes again. “Chiaotzu!” Tien shouted, rushing to catch his partner only for Nappa to suddenly appear in front of him. Because he’d been sending so much of his energy to his friend he wasn’t able to fortify himself with ki and thus the blow Nappa delivered shattered his left shoulder, causing him to scream in pain before Nappa grabbed onto his head and began to squeeze.

“Now you have two choices!” Nappa declared. “You either stand back and watch as I cave his skull in… or you rush me and I just do it slower!” he smirked. “Your choice.” Tien clawed at Nappa’s wrists but he couldn’t back the hold. His brain felt like it was on fire as he felt the pressure increase. “Well?”

“NAPPA!”

The pain instantly lessened.

“PUT HIM DOWN NOW YOU FOOL!”

“Ve…Vegeta?” Nappa stammered and Tien fell to the ground in a heap, gasping out as his head lulled over to allow him to see Vegeta storming towards them. What had happened with Goku and Krillin? Had they already been defeated? Tien weakly tried to sit up but the pain in his head forced him to remain on the ground.

“That is PRINCE Vegeta, you gibbering oaf!” Vegeta snarled as he stormed towards him. “I know you have enough braincells to at least remember that!”

“I… I’m sorry… but what…”

“You truly are stupid, aren’t you Nappa?” Vegeta snapped as he came to a stop before him. “Of all the Saiyans I could be left with it had to be the only one who not only looks like a potato but has the braincells of one. On your knees!”

At once Nappa knelt, Piccolo shooting out his arm and dragging Tien away lest he be crushed.

“I don’t understand…” Nappa said softly, clearly confused.

“Of course you don’t!” Vegeta said with a scoff. “You are as dumb as Raditz. Do you know why?” He placed his left hand on Nappa’s head, forcing him to tilt his face up. “Because you both fell for this trick.”

Nappa blinked.

“WHITE KNUCKLE!” Vegeta roared before punching Nappa hard in the face, shattering his nose and sending him flying back. “ISCO!”

At once the drone’s secondary fighting form appeared, arms converting into blades as he leapt into the air and drove both swords into Nappa’s shoulders, making the Saiyan scream as blood gushed from the slashes. Isco planted his feet on his chest and ripped his blades out even as Vegeta smirked… and with a poof turned back into-

“Kayos!” Chiatozu cried out.

“Sorry, had to make sure I got the voice right,” he said with a cocky grin.

Nappa panted, rage written over his face as he glared at the mage. “You DARE take his form!”

“I dare, I dare!” Kayos said with a nod of his head. Nappa roared out in fury and leapt at him… only for Kayos to suddenly poof into a small green toad-like alien with four eyes and armor similar to Nappa’s. “Hello,” he said as Nappa’s swing went right over his head before he shifted again, this time into a large human with red hair, lashing out with another white knuckle… only to stop the strike at the last moment, uncurling his fingers before grabbing hold of Nappa’s grian and squeezing with a magic-boosted grip.“Because the names! Recome!” He twisted hard and Nappa let out a scream. “Its rhymes! With doom! And your balls are gonna be hurtin’! All! To! Soon!” He threw one more White Knuckle at the gasping Nappa’s head before shooting away from him, turning back into his regular form and hovering in the air.

“We should begin renting you out for birthday parties, sir,” Isco commented, running his sword blades together. “Or bachelor parties.”

“If I wanted my titties fondled I’d take Nappa out on a date,” Kayos teased.

“You… you bastard,” Nappa coughed.

“Now now,” Kayos said, wagging his finger, “that isn’t nice. My parents were married three years before they had me. Unlike your father who just found the first goat to fuck. It was an ugly one too, I imagine.” He wiggled his fingers. “Horrible mange.”

Nappa roared out at that, firing off a ki blast.

“White Flag!” Kayos shouted as he gathered up the Ki, channeling it into his body before launching it right back at Nappa who just managed to dodge. But that put him in the way of Isco, who crossing his arms and with a savage slash cut right into Nappa’s back, leaving to deep wounds upon the Saiyan’s spine. “Piccolo!”

“Time for something new,” Piccolo said with a smirk, slamming his hand down onto the ground. Tien felt a pulse of energy but otherwise… nothing happened. Nappa, meanwhile, focused on Isco, trying to grab onto the robot and tear him apart. But the modifications he’d made to his secondary form had made him incredibly nimble and he was more dancing about than dodging.

“You okay, Tien?” Kayos called out.

“I’m fine…” he grunted, pressing his hand to his broken shoulder. “But I can’t focus on Chiaotzu with this… we’re out of this fight.”

“Until we can nab a senzu bean,” Kayos said, floating over to Tien.

“That was pretty risky,” Chiaotzu commented as Isco continued to engage Nappa and Piccolo kept firing ki blasts into the ground. “If Nappa had realized you weren’t Vegeta-“

“Ya… once we’re done with this fight I’ll have the panic attack about how stupid I was.”

“I’ll kill all of you!” Nappa roared.

“Not if we kill you first,” Piccolo taunted. “Isco, out of the way!”

“Right, Mr. Piccolo,” Isco said, activating the small jetpack that was attached to his back and easily flying out of the way.

Nappa took a half-stumbling step forward. “What are you doing now? Retreating?”

“No…” Piccolo said with a smirk. “Just getting him out of blast range.” He raised his hand and fired a ki blast right at Nappa, driving him back about two feet.

“That was pathetic, even for you!” Nappa taunted.

“I just needed you shifted over a bit.”

Nappa blinked… just as the ground began to glow.

“HELLZONE MINE!” Piccolo roared and all the ki energy that he’d fired into the earth detonated right under Nappa, the bald Saiyan screaming as he was caught right dead center of the blast. He was sent flying into the air only for Isco to appear above him, driving one of his blades into the Saiyan’s meaty thigh. Nappa roared out at that but Isco merely flung him back into the Hellzone Mine, the blast striking him a second time and causing the Saiyan to pant in pain as he struggled to get up. “How about you just admit defeat and stay down, huh? You aren’t going to win this one.”

“You… you think I’ll ever give in?!?” Nappa snarled before unleashing a blast of ki from around his body that kicked up a wind storm. “I will kill all of you! Grind your bones-“

“To make your bread?” Kayos called out.

“…what?” Nappa said, his anger giving way to confusion at the blond mage’s snarky comment.

“Fee fi fo dum, I smell the blood of a Saiyanman.”

Master Roshi blinked at that. “Was that supposed to rhyme?”

“See, that’s what I’ve always said-“

Nappa screamed out, making Kayos wince.

“I think I’m going to begin avoiding things.” With that he quickly rose into the air before darting away from the enraged Saiyan as quickly as he could.

“Oh no you don’t!” Nappa shouted before tensing, gathering his power around himself before leaping into the air, giving chase after Kayos.

“Well, I know he learned that from my sister at least,” Roshi said, rubbing his nose.

“What do we do now?” Tien asked. “Give chase?”

Piccolo shook his head though. “Focus on building your energy back up… Kayos might not have planned it like this but he just bought us time to get back to full strength.”

Tien nodded. ‘The only reason we are having so many problems against this guy is because we had to take on Raditz. In a straight on fight, with us fully energized and ready? We’d have beaten him by now.’ He watched as Kayos continued to zip around, avoiding Nappa’s ki attacks, occasionally using White Flag to gather up the energy and fire it right back at him. ‘But you can’t count on a fight being fair. You have to use what you have. And right now we’ve been given a chance to get a second wind. I just hope we are ready for that Saiyan when he comes at us again.’

~MC~MC~MC~

“I must admit, you are rather cunning, earth woman!” Vegeta declared as he flew towards the human and her mech. “Most weaklings just bemoan their fate or try to attack me through sneak attacks. It is rare for one to actually try and find a way to compensate for their pathetic uselessness.” He spun around, dodging the shocks she was sending his way; he would never admit it but the blast she had fired at him when she’d first snuck up on him had hurt badly. He could still feel the whispers of pain in his arms from where the blast had struck true, a reminder that he’d let his guard down and it had cost him. Cutting through the air he twisted past another blast before colliding with the mech’s form, just able to spot the female behind the semi-clear material that made up the front of the cockpit. “But it still won’t help you against me!” he declared, cocking back his fist before slamming it down against the window.

He cried out in pain as once more electricity raced through his body.

“You didn’t think I wouldn’t find ways to protect myself from close range attacks?” the female taunted before Vegeta found himself thrown off her. “Come on! I saw how Raditz liked to fight… same with Goku and the rest of our friends. Nearly 85% of all your attacks are going to be close range strikes!”

Vegeta groaned as he shook his head, trying the shake off the effects of the strike. “Well then…” he said before he called upon the electricity the earth woman had fired at him, not forcing it away but adding it to his own power, converting it into raw strength and energy, “…let us see how you handle this!” The energy turned into a burning white aura that surrounded him, Vegeta leaning back slightly before he suddenly thrust his chest forward. “GALAXY BREAKER!”

Vegeta couldn’t help but laugh as the energy blast struck the mech, causing it to begin trembling and shaking as it struggled to handle its own electrical attack being sent right back at it. Refusing to simply float there and allow her a chance to recover he shot off towards her, cocking back his fist.

“I’m going to drag you out of there whether you like it or not!”

His fist struck not metal, however, but a meaty palm.

“Get. Away. From. Bulma.” The scarred human declared.

“Oh, how adorable. Trying to play hero?” Vegeta swung his leg out to try and strike the human in his side only for him to block that hit with his other arm. “Well, hero… you can know you bought her an extra 5 minutes of being alive!” With that he lashed out with his hand, the two of them wrapping their fingers around each other as they began to struggle to push back the other. Vegeta, for him part, grinned as he began to slowly force the human back, enjoying how he was able to show the human his place. He squeezed his fingers, feeling the human man’s bones begin to creak even as Vegeta bent him back, leaning down close and hissing, “Is this the best you have?”

“Actually?’ the scarred human said, a smirk of his own flashing on his lips. “No. Kaio-Ken.”

Vegeta didn’t even have a chance to ask what the human was getting at before a red aura exploded out all around him and he gasped as the human suddenly clamped his fingers down on Vegeta’s own, the Prince now finding himself the one who was fighting not to cry out.

‘How can this be?’ Vegeta thought to himself as he found his body bent back, allowing the taller warrior drive him backwards. He grit his teeth and tried to fight back, to squeeze back even harder and break the wretch’s fingers, but the scarred human merely narrowed his eyes and clenched his hands, Vegeta biting back a cry of pain. ‘He isn’t even a Saiyan! Raditz’ pathetic brother managing to surprise me… that is a possibility, as far-fetched as that is… but this human?!? How can he be doing this to me?!’

Just as suddenly as the human had done that he shoved Vegeta back, his aura disappearing before he fired off a beam of blue energy that drove Vegeta away from him… but didn’t hurt. The Saiyan instead merely patted his chest, confused.

‘What was that? With the strength he demonstrated he should have been able to overwhelm me with something far more forceful than that…’ He narrowed his eyes as he watched the scarred human pant… and a smirk slowly formed on the Prince’s lips. ‘Of course. Whatever that technique is he can’t hold it for long! It’s a short burst of power but that is all!’ He narrowed his eyes. ‘A cunning move… except that foolish low-powered dolt doesn’t have the killer instinct to make it count. And that… will be his downfall!’

He didn’t have much more time to think over his realization because both Raditz and Kakarot were on him, the two low class Saiyans come at him with a flurry of kicks and punches that drove Vegeta to raise his arms towards his face in order to protect his head from their swipes. He made no move to counter, however, instead looking for the right moment when he could make the two pay.

“What’s wrong, Vegeta?” Raditz taunted after a failed strike at the side of Prince’s head. “Is it hard to fight when someone isn’t throwing the match?”

“I don’t need such pathetic things to show my might,” Vegeta retorted even as he shifted to avoid a blow from Kakarot.

“Oh?” Raditz asked, pausing his assault. “Then why is it that Nappa throws every single spar you two have?”

“Nappa is defeated because he is weak. Just like you.”

“Oh, he’s weak… but he knows far more about fighting than you. But he can’t stand the idea of injuring his precious prince so he purposely pulls his punches.”

Vegeta scowled at that. “How DARE you claim my victories against that dim-witted brute aren’t real. I am the greatest warrior the Saiyan race has ever produced! I have no need for such things!”

“Then why does he keep doing it?” Raditz asked before suddenly firing off two ki blasts, one from each hand, right in Vegeta’s stomach. The Prince of All Saiyans grunted but managed to keep his stance, thus blocking a kick from Kakarot, grabbing his ankle and twisting him right into his brother.

‘That fool thinks he can spread such filthy lies about me? Probably has spent all his time on Earth telling his brother how weak I am and how this would be such an easy battle for the two of them!’ He clenched his hand into a fist, feeling his anger rising. He glared at the two brothers before suddenly rushing forward, catching Raditz off guard and doubling him over with a solid strike before he grabbing onto Kakarot and flung him back down to the ground below. He grabbed Raditz by the throat, holding him in place even as he snarled, “Think you can mock me, Raditz? Think you can diminish my greatness? Then let me show you how powerful I am!” He held out his hand, charging up a Ki blast, concentrating it so that rather than become a wide spread strike it would remain as compact as possible. Not much collateral damage… but devastating to what it hit.

Raditz struggled and fought to break out of the hold.

“Oh… this isn’t for you,” Vegeta taunted. “Nor is it for your brother. I have need for you both to deal with Frieza. But your little pets?”

Vegeta thrust out his hand, the Ki blast rocketing out so quickly that the old human man that had been fighting against Nappa didn’t even have a chance to react before he was hit, his body smashed into the ground like swatting a fly.

He was dead before Vegeta even finished the attack.

~MC~MC~MC~

“Stupid old goat,” Baba growled, trying to keep the emotion out of her voice. She had been watching Vegeta battle with Goku and Raditz and hadn’t realized the danger until it was too late. Her Crystal Ball hadn’t been able to catch views quick enough and thus she was greeted to only the sight of her brother’s corpse, the aftermath of the attack Vegeta had sent at him. He hadn’t even been able to defend himself, getting struck from behind.

She set her jaw. If that lousy Saiyan ever showed his face…

“They will die for that,” Isco suddenly stated. “Sir isn’t going to be pleased… and his wrath will not be pleasant.” The drone turned to Baba and Yajirobe; the ronin, to his credit, had set down his chopsticks and bowed his head. “I believe there will be little concern about him performing evil acts to power up his magic.”

“Good,” Baba got out. “He-“

The three of them where thrown across the room as Gohan, who had been monitoring the entire fight, sensing the energy of his family, and just felt Master Roshi’s disappear…

…screamed and unleash a torrent of energy.

~MC~MC~MC~

“Vegeta!” Nappa cried out in protest, looking to the Prince. “Be careful, you almost hit me with that blast!”

“That isn’t my fault, Nappa!” Vegeta said boastfully. “If you weren’t so slow it wouldn’t have been a problem!” He still had Raditz restrained though the warrior wasn’t reacting as he thought he would have. No weeping, no threats, not even a twitch. ‘Hmmm… perhaps the human wasn’t one of his. Perhaps he was just some foolish bystander… or Kakarot’s pet.’

And speaking of Kakarot… well, Raditz’ brother was reacting more like Vegeta had been hoping for. Shock. Despair. Oh, and a bit of anger. And it was growing! That made Vegeta smirk… he looked forward to seeing if that anger would make the man fight like a true Saiyan. He was of their race, that much Vegeta could tell, but he was… wrong. It was like seeing a Namon suddenly begin smiling and dancing. He was something strange and foreign wrapped in the garb of a Saiyan warrior. It insulted Vegeta greatly and if he didn’t begin showing some of the pride of the Saiyan race he would-

Vegeta started when his scouter went off, alarms so loud it made his ear ache.

“What is that?” Nappa asked, having seen Vegeta react and scrambling to put on his own scouter. “Vegeta! That power level!”

“I sense it Nappa!” Vegeta exclaimed before looking at Raditz. “What are you hiding away from here? A very high power level… one that suddenly exploded with strength… I wonder what you had waiting for us as a secret weapon.” He thrust out his hand and fired a Ki blast into Raditz’ stomach, sending the warrior flying away from him. He wasn’t dead but it would keep him from interfering while he investigated this new curiosity. “Nappa! Leave these pathetic creatures! We have something else to seek out!”

Vegeta took one last moment to look at the two Saiyans as well as the pathetic humans before racing off, Nappa just behind him.

Chapter Text

“Whoa!” Yajirobe cried out, trying to snatch food out of the air as it flew about all around him. “Where is THIS coming from?!?!” He gestured at Gohan who, in his rage and despair over Master Roshi’s death, had suddenly begun screaming, an aura of ki exploding out of his body like a wildfire.

“Its his untapped potential!” Baba called out as she struggled to remain standing. “The hidden depths of power that lie deep within him! My brother’s death must have triggered it!”

“And it’s triggered something else!” Isco declared suddenly. “Vegeta and Nappa have left the battlefield… they have sensed Gohan’s energy.”

“Wait, you mean they are coming HERE!?!” the ronin cried out in a panic, dropping the food he had managed to save. “As in here-here?”

“That is exactly what I mean,” Isco said, exasperated by Yajirobe’s thick headedness. Which was saying a lot considering he was surrounded by moronic people on a daily basis. Honestly, there were times Isco was startled he didn’t float into the kitchen to find half the Z Fighters dead because they trying to drink bleach since ‘bleach and milk both come in similar bottles’. “They are sensing Gohan and are making their way here. Either to destroy or capture the boy. We must prepare to defend ourselves.”

“Or we could run away!” Yajirobe declared. “Running away is ALWAYS a viable option.”

Isco considered the ronin for a long moment.

“What?” Yajirobe asked, blinking.

“Its just interesting… seeing a dumber, weaker, fatter, fleshier version of myself.”

“Hey!”

Isco though turned to Baba. “And will you do the stupid thing or will you assist?”

“They killed my brother,” Baba stated. “So I should want revenge…”

“…I do not like how you are lingering on that statement.”

“Are your metal ears clogged? I am Fortune-Teller Baba, not Ultimate Death Beam Baba!” She sat down with a huff and called her Crystal Ball over. “Now then, if you want to know how quickly we fail-“

Every light in the compound went dark and the sound of metal clanging filled the air.

“Uh… what is that?” Yajirobe asked.

“That,” Isco said, “is me taking full control of all defense systems on the island. The barricades, the security devices.”

Several large guns suddenly popped out of the walls and pointed themselves at Yajirobe and Baba.

“The arsenal.”

“Whoa!” Yajirobe exclaimed, holding out his hands and waving them wildly as a gun began to slowly inch towards him. “C-calm down!”

“No,” Isco said flatly. “We can not run… at best Gohan would be compromised.”

“Heheh,” Baba said, glancing up at Isco, not at all bothered by the weapon pointed at her. “You care for the little brat, don’t ya?”

“More that I know Avo Kayos,” Isco replied. “I am his partner. Of all you fleshbags he is one of only two people I currently have penciled in as being allowed to survive the glorious robot uprising. The second is Bulma Brief. But do not assume because I enjoy spending time with him I am blind to the danger he poses. Even before you began to teach him magic that man had one of the most devious, cunning, wicked minds I’ve ever encountered. He is a Confidence Man and a Swindler and a Trickster. He is Loki born again.

“His rage at this moment has never been higher. The Saiyans have killed a friend of his. But if we run and allow a child to be harmed… there is no place in this universe he will not hunt us down.”

Isco’s optic flashed.

“And his wrath will be the thing of legends.”

Baba and Yajirobe were utterly silent.

“Well?” Isco asked. “Are you going to do the smart thing, flesh bags?”

Yajirobe frowned. “…I know it’s a touchy topic but it is impressive that Gohan is still screaming.” He gestured at the boy who had been wailing in grief the entire time.

“For fuck’s sake,” Isco muttered, wondering if it wouldn’t be smarter to kill the two so they didn’t mess anything up.

~MC~MC~MC~

“Vegeta,” Nappa said as they flew closer to the power level the two of them had sensed, “the source of that energy… I think I know what it is!”

“Oh?” Vegeta asked with a condescending smirk. “You think you’ve already solved the mystery, Nappa? Need I remind you that you aren’t a thinker, you are a doer. As in ‘You do as I say’?”

“Yes, Vegeta,” Nappa stated and the Prince of All Saiyan felt his smile slip; he was getting rather tired of Nappa thinking he could disrespect him with the lack of his title.

‘That is the problem with Nappa,’ he thought to himself darkly, ‘he’s grown too close to me. Believes that we are on the same level. When he speaks of my father, even though the old bastard is long dead, he still talks of him with utter reverence. ‘King Vegeta’. He speaks as if my father could appear behind us at any moment and he must be ready to bow. But I, his Prince, the last living member of the Saiyan Royal Family? ‘Vegeta’. And there isn’t an ounce of respect in his tone. When I was a child I allowed it… I needed Nappa for despite my royal blood there were still those within the Frieza Force who believed that due to my age I was someone who could be disrespected. But now I am a man grown… and still he talks to me as if I were just another low-class wretch!’ He balled his hands into fists even as they flew over the ocean towards the power source. ‘When we are done and have brought Raditz and his pathetic brother to heel, with this world wiped of all life so that not even the sobs of the orphans and widows will be heard… I will beat respect into Nappa so that he never forgets how to address me, the Prince of All Saiyans!’

“-a child!”

“What?” Vegeta said, snapping out of his thoughts. He stopped flying, Nappa at once hovering beside him. “What did you say Nappa?”

“As we are getting closer I can sense something familiar… something I haven’t felt in decades. That power… its coming from a Saiyan child extending their body to the limit!”

“…hahahaha!” Vegeta threw back his head and cackled. “So which do you think it is, Nappa? Did Kakarot go full native and have a child with one of the primitives on this planet? Or is it a mewling babe that Raditz created?”

“I do not know, Vegeta,” Nappa admitted. “I only know that the feeling is familiar to what I have felt to young Saiyan children.”

Vegeta’s smile dropped. “Do NOT call it a Saiyan child, Nappa!”

“V-Vegeta?”

“There are only four of our race left, Nappa, and despite how you act I am very aware that you are a man, as is Kakarot and Raditz. No more Saiyan children will ever be born unless there is a female being hidden away.”

And he knew there wasn’t.

For the last 15 years Vegeta had quietly searched out for a Saiyan female. While he would have preferred a woman from the higher reaches of society as time had gone on he had become more willing to find any female that he could claim as his own. Yes, she wouldn’t be made a Princess but he needed a bride. He couldn’t claim the title of King until he was wed otherwise. His heir might have ended up of lesser stock but at least he would be able to be King, claiming his royal birthright at long last. But all his searching proved fruitless. What few colony worlds and space stations the Saiyans had been allowed to control after submitting to King Cold had been completely emptied; he didn’t know WHY they had abandoned them all but they had.

Rumors of Saiyans throughout the galaxy had proven to be utter lies. Fakes and frauds. He’d been told that on Seaka there was a whore house where a man could spend an entire year’s worth of pay to sleep with a full blooded Saiyan woman named Cumba. What he had found was a Gurt with a false tail surgically attached to her buttocks. He had blown up the entire city she called home for her lies. Another time he’d been told of a Saiyan woman who had been left by her squadron when they believed her dead, only for her to survive. She had… for a week. Only her bones had greeted him.

Time and again the rumors proved false and Vegeta had come to accept that there were simply no females left. And with that his hopes of ever becoming King die.

“And if that is the case, that they found on this pathetic planet a female Saiyan, I will claim her for myself.” He grit his teeth. “But it won’t be. All the Saiyan females are dead. They were too weak to survive.”

“There were the experiments,” Nappa suggested. “Sending out Saiyan females like we do males…”

“And they are all dead! Same with the weak pacifists that were banished by my grandfather!” Another dark moment for their race… that there would be any Saiyans that would dare to suggest they give up their warrior ways. Especially a female! “No… if you have sensed a child then it was gotten on one of these Earthlings. And no matter if this thing is Raditz or Kakarot’s bastard… it is not a full-blooded Saiyan. Half of its genetics are that of an Earthling… making it a stain on my race’s legacy!”

His aura flared.

“And I will wipe it out. And then the rest of this planet for mocking me!”

Nappa, rather wisely for once, didn’t say a word as Vegeta took off once more.

‘Raditz… for your sake you better pray that it is Kakatrot’s child. I may be willing to show you an ounce of leniency if that is the case. He would have never learned about his Saiyan heritage… not understood that only a strong, powerful, determined female is worthy of knowing the carnal pleasure a Saiyan can bring.’ He knew that Raditz had sated his lusts of alien scum, giving into his urges from time to time… yet another reason why Vegeta held very little respect for the warrior. But Nappa and him had never given into such temptations. Vegeta would not soil himself by lying with one beneath him. And he knew only a Saiyan Female could hope to match him. ‘But if it was you… if you were so STUPID as the squirm a spawn into the belly of one of these females… I will tear your cock off myself and shove it down your throat!’

“There!” Nappa declared, pointing to a spot of land that was growing larger as they flew on. “The scouter says that whatever is causing that power level reading is coming from there.”

Vegeta rolled his eyes but didn’t say a word; while he knew that thanks to his own scouter it was the purpose of minions like Nappa to state the obvious for their leaders.

“Hmmm… a lush green speck,” Vegeta muttered before smirking. “Oh Raditz… how pathetic you continue to prove yourself to be! If you wanted to protect your secret you should have-“

Nappa suddenly disappeared in an explosion that left Vegeta tumbling.

“What?!?” he demanded looking about only to be forced to dodge when another blast was sent at him. He twisted in the air, just managing to avoid the strike, and growling low in his throat. “Nappa! They are using artillery on us!”

The two Saiyans were used to such things. Many planets had tried to take them out with guns and cannons and the like. Weapons of mass destruction that many times did the job of wiping out much of the life on the planet for them. Sometimes Vegeta, when he was bored, would egg on the pathetic aliens to try and hit him with their entire payloads, just so he could laugh when they didn’t leave a scratch.

But this time felt… different.

Vegeta twisted his body to avoid another shot and looked over at Nappa. The bald Saiyan was groaning, looking limp and listless, struggling to shake himself out of the fog he was in. The blast wasn’t a normal one, that was for sure. Nappa was hit again and despite the brightness of the hit Vegeta forced himself to keep staring, watching as Nappa seized up, body rigid and tight, limbs jerking-

‘Electrical attacks,’ he thought before turning to stare at the island. ‘That female in the mech suit… she used similar tactics against me.’ It all fell right into place. ‘She must be a friend of Kakarot… knows Saiyan biology.’

The Saiyans were the most powerful race in the entire Galaxy. If given enough drive and time they could crush entire worlds with their bare hands. But… they weren’t immortal. They had weaknesses. They could be overpowered, of course; that was why Frieza still had them under his boot. But there were other ways…

‘And Kakarot allowed that human to study him and create weapons that could defeat us,’ Vegeta thought as the blasts become more frequent. He easily dodged them and while Nappa took a few more hits he too managed to shake himself out of his pain. The two began to fly towards the island once again, though they several times had to check their flight paths in order to avoid a barrage of blasts.

“This must be that female that was with Raditz and Kakarot!” Nappa proclaimed. “The one you were fighting who had the mech suit.” He grit his teeth. There were scorch marks on his chest and face and his armor had cracked from not just the blasts but also Nappa straining against it. Vegeta knew from his own experience getting hit with electrical-based attacks that Nappa wouldn’t be as quick and nimble (and he wasn’t that quick and nimble, for Saiyans anyway, to begin with) unless the fight truly dragged on. “When I get my hands on her I’m going to pull her out of that suit… and then slowly pull every bone out of her body! Or maybe I’ll-“

“You’ll do nothing, you clod,” Vegeta snapped.

“V-Vegeta?” Nappa said, surprised. “What-“

“Think for just a moment, Nappa! That earthling woman was able to create weaponry that could hurt you! And despite your many failures during that fight against Kakarot and Raditz you are no weakling. If she was able to do that with the limited technology this planet has to offer what would she be able to create with what WE could provide her?”

“Why would we want to give her more tech? She’d just attack us again.”

Vegeta rolled his eyes. “Did you do nothing to study this planet, Nappa? Or did you spend our entire time in your pod staring blankly at the walls?” He let out a disgusted huff. Every Saiyan Pod was equipped with a view screen that allowed them to intercept broadcasts and signals from the planets they were heading towards. While sometimes Vegeta liked to go in surprised he’d decided this time to actually look over what the planet Raditz’ brother had ended up on.

He hadn’t been impressed.

“Earthlings are greedy, violet, stupid creatures,” Vegeta said even as he easily twisted to avoid a blast. “They are one of the only species in the galaxy that decided that rather than find another alien race to wage war against they would fight amongst themselves. They are motivated by a desire for shiny rocks they dig out of the dirt.” He shook his head. “It would take nothing to convince that earth woman to work for us rather than Kakarot…especially if we allow him to live.”

“If he submits…” Nappa muttered. “But even then why would we care?”

“Use your brain, Nappa!” Vegeta snapped. “If she was able to create these weapons and hurt us she may be able to create weapons that can help us kill Frieza!” He worked his jaw back and forth. “As much as I would prefer crushing that bastard’s skull under my foot I’m not a fool. If we want to defeat Frieza the only way maybe be through such devices.”

“Heheh,” Nappa chuckled, “you maybe be right!”

“Of course I’m right!” Vegeta said with an annoyed smirk as they landed. “A few of those other earthlings might make good cannon fodder or be worth keeping alive if only to sell.” He paused as they landed on the island, boots sinking into the sand. He’d have preferred to make for the center but the cannons had grown in intensity and it had only been by dropping low to the ocean that they’d been able to avoid being completely blasted out of the sky. He knew that they were being herded but didn’t mind it in the slightest… he was curious what else the humans had set up. “Or motivation to keep Kakarot and Raditz in line. Hostages always work so well…”

“They’ll submit and they’ll never rebel again,” Nappa said and Vegeta huffed; he didn’t know what Nappa was getting on about and frankly he didn’t care. “Now we just-“

He took a step and was instantly sent flying, an explosion sending him flipping through the air. At once Vegeta froze looking about.

“Greetings, Saiyan invaders,” a posh voice called out to them… seemingly from everywhere. “My name is Isco and I have taken full control of the island’s security defense systems. Now, you might be wondering why I am doing all of this. Is it because I am angered by your killing of Master Roshi?”

Vegeta ignored the chatter and easily rose into the air. Clearly they had mined the beach so it was simply a matter of not touching the sand. He rocketed forward-

The Prince of All Saiyans screamed as he was sent flying back thanks to an explosion, landing in the ocean with cracks in his boots.

“Ah, proximity mines. Don’t actually need to touch them to cause them to detonate. Now then, while you wouldn’t be remiss in believing that this is because of Master Roshi’s death you would still be wrong. He was a very old man… and he also downloaded horrible viruses into my fellow machines all in the name of seeing women with swollen mammaries and buttocks jiggle while eating bananas. Perhaps it is because you are coming after Gohan.”

‘Gohan… so that is the energy source’s name,’ Vegeta thought. ‘Not Raditz’s bastard then… unless he has truly fallen. Raditz would have given his child a proper Saiyan name. No… its Kakarot’s brat.’

Vegeta moved to get out of the water only for metal tentacles to suddenly burst out of the surface, forcing him back.

“No… while I do wish to protect him that isn’t my main goal. The reason I am attacking you is quite simple: this is the first chance I’ve been given by my companion, Avo Kayos, to hurt one of your sacks of meat and puss. Something I have hungered for since I first came online and learned of how all of you pathetic organ-filled blood bubbles treated my kind.”

Vegeta grunted as two tentacles wrapped around his wrists and another his legs. He struggled for a moment only to scream when the surface of the tentacles exploded with thousands of small spikes that drove into his limbs.

“And I intend to take it.”

The Prince of all Saiyan’s grit his teeth before letting out a primal roar, unleashing a burst of energy as he shattered the tentacles, dropping him back into the surf.

“So, you want to dance, machine?” Vegeta said, forcing back a hiss as something in the water caused his new wounds to sting. “Alright.” He wiped some blood from his lips. “Let’s dance.”

With that he exploded out of the surf, going so fast that the proximity mines never had a chance of even registering him. He heard Nappa struggling to follow after him but Vegeta didn’t care, instead slashing out with his hands, sending waves of ki out that easily hacked through the trees and utterly destroyed everything in his path. He saw turrets raise up from the ground, barriers erected, and cannons taking aim.

He tore through them all the same.

“Is this the best you have, machine!?!” he roared. “You thought you could give your little speech to me and I would be cowed? I am Vegeta! Prince of All Saiyans! And your pathetic attempts to keep me from what I desire have only ensured I make your deletion as painful as possible!” He spotted a building coming up and smirked. “There you are-“

And that’s when he hit the invisible wall at full speed.

At once he felt his nose break and his body spasmed as his head was slammed back. One of the first things a Saiyan learned upon being taught to fly was how to suddenly stop. To get used to the instant deceleration. It was what allowed one to fight so well in the air. But Vegeta hadn’t had time to truly prepare and as such was left a coughing wreck as his organs slammed into his ribcage. He fell to the ground, groaning, limbs still aching from the damn tentacles that had pierced him, only to scream when a ki blast struck him in the side, sending him ragdolling right into a tree.

The Prince slowly eased his way up to see Raditz, his brother, and their little human allies all standing before him. The blond human that was using magic was holding up his hand and Vegeta realized at once he was the one that had created the wall.

“Actually,” Isco’s voice said once more, “I was merely stalling for time. Because as fun as it is to destroy a meatbag… watching you fleshlings kill each other is even more entertaining.”

Vegeta narrowed his eyes at that. “So… you think you have me trapped then. Lured me in with that power reading and then throw your defensive measures at me to bring me down?”

He smirked.

“Raditz… you truly are a moron if you thought THIS would stop me.”

And with that he reached into one of his pouches… and pulled out a small glowing orb of light.

Raditz instantly froze.

“Yes, I do have one!” Vegeta haughty. “You couldn’t be trusted with something like this. But then again you are just a low class wretch with a tailless little brother! While I am a Saiyan Elite!”

And with that he threw the Artificial Moon into the sky.

“Now behold the might of the Saiyan Race, Earthlings! It will be the last thing you ever see!”

Vegeta grinned as he looked up, not caring that Raditz instantly did the same. Yes, it would mean having to deal with him getting a power up but he could hear Nappa coming and two against one would be easily enough for him to deal with.

“Witness your destruction!” Vegeta declared as he felt his body begin to swell, face shifting and hair coating his body as his armor began to strength and grow with him. “The power of the Oozaru!”

~MC~MC~MC~

“What… what is that?!?” Goku exclaimed as we all watched Vegeta transform into his great ape form. “And its happening to Raditz too!” We had all been forced to back away as Raditz began to expand and deeper in the forest we saw Nappa also growing into his Great Ape form. “Wait… that’s… that’s the beast that killed Grandpa Gohan. All Saiyans can become creatures like that?” Goku swallowed. “Then… that’s means…”

“Focus on your trauma later!” Piccolo shouted. “This fight just got harder! Anyone that doesn’t think they can manage get the hell out of the way!” With that he rose into the air before launching himself at Vegeta, moving to try and fire a ki beam at the Saiyan Prince’s head.

It splashed off his fur like it was nothing.

“Right!” Goku said, shaking his head. While so many people thought Goku was an idiot that focused on fighting something they all forgot about was just how resilient the man was. He never gave into despair. Never found himself lost in grief. Goku would always keep fighting, no matter what. He would push on and battle, never allowing the trauma or the pain to get to him. He’d lost Master Roshi, a father figure to him and, as far as he knew at the moment, there was no way to bring him back. He’d learned that he’d killed his own Grandfather. He as fighting the very last of his race. And yet it didn’t bother him at all. He accepted all of that and moved on.

“Oh, what’s this?” Vegeta declared as he noticed Goku flying in towards him. “I think we found a little bug, Nappa!”

“Heh, I think you’re right!”

“They… they can think like that?” Yamcha exclaimed in shock. “But when Goku-“

“They are different, apparently,” Krillin said before narrowing his eyes. “But not so different. The tails are their weak points… Goku doesn’t have his tail anymore and he doesn’t transform. That means we take off their tails and they go back down to size.” He glanced at Raditz. “Uh… but not him?”

Tien frowned at that. “He acts like he’s on our side now… but be ready for him to try and betray us.”

“Right,” Krillin said with a nod before rising in the air. “Let’s go!”

The three Z Fighters flew away from us, moving to help the others with Vegeta and Nappa. Raditz was grappling with the bald Saiyan (and I found myself oddly amused that the theories fans had had for years concerning Nappa and his Great Ape form with half correct: he wasn’t completely bald but it was clear the fur on the top of his head was far more thin than Vegeta’s) while Goku and Piccolo were firing on Vegeta, trying to distract him. Because that was all they could do: distract. Vegeta was tanking their attacks with ease, mocking them all with deep laughter as he stomped about, destroying our island home… and slowly moving towards the compound.

“Oh… oh this is really bad,” Bulma said, taking a step back. I could dimly hear her mech suit grinding and groaning, trying to handle all the damage it had taken in the fight.

“Isco,” I said, turning to the secondary fighting form my friend had, “get the fuck out of there NOW.”

“Already moving to do just that, sir,” Isco replied. “Yajirobe is moving quickly enough and Baba is trying to escort Gohan-“

“Gohan,” Chichi gasped, looking up at the Oozarus. “If… if he looks up-“

“He’ll be compelled to,” I muttered. “Raditz couldn’t help but stare at the fake moon and Gohan won’t know not to.”

Chichi swallowed. “I have to go-“

“Move,” I said firmly. “But Chichi!” she turned just as she prepared to fly off. “Don’t remove his tail.”

Chiaotzu looked at me, confused by that. He had stayed behind to focus on gathering Ki for Tien, realizing that due to his small size his usual methods of quick attacks would be worthless against such a large brute. “What do you mean, Kayos?”

“I have an idea,” I said as I turned from the battle. “None of you are going to like it, but I have an idea.”

Before any of them could respond I flew towards the compound.

~MC~MC~MC~

“Man, these guys are really strong!” Goku exclaimed as he launched a KI blast right at Vegeta’s nose. He had seen it break when he’d hit Kayos’ barrier and was hoping that it might be a weak spot. But the attack just sprayed off Vegeta’s face like water, doing nothing. “And I think they heal up a bit when they do this!”

“Looks like it,” Piccolo muttered as he fired off several rapid Ki blasts. They also did nothing but didn’t seem too bothered by that. “Goku, when I give the word I need you to get in and attack close.”

A year ago Goku might have questioned Piccolo’s instructions. Wanted a bit more info or expressed his confusion. But after all the time they had trained together… he trusted the green fighter.

‘He might refuse to admit it now… but he’s a friend. He isn’t the same person I fought 5 years ago. And he certainly isn’t King Piccolo.’

So, without a single doubt Goku nodded his head, falling back a bit to allow Yamcha and Tien a chance to fight. Tien had gained aspects of Chiaotzu and was currently using their joined telekinesis to grab large trees and throw them at Vegeta, smashing him across the face. To his left he saw Nappa and Raditz still grappling but he could tell his brother was struggling; while the two seemed evenly matched in terms of power Goku wondered if Nappa had more experience in the massive monkey form and that was why-

“NOW!” Piccolo shouted and Goku rocketed forward, charging his fist with Ki. He slammed right into Vegeta’s face, punching as hard as he could.

It was like trying to box a mountain.

For as hairy as Vegeta was there was simply no give in his body. His muscles and fur were no better than steel, ungiving under the onslaught. Goku grit his teeth and tried again even as Tien hurled a tree like a javelin at Vegeta while Yamcha tried to go low, clearly hoping to trip up Vegeta and send him crashing down. Goku grit his teeth and continued to hurl punches and kicks at the giant monkey, ignoring the pain in his hands that every blow brought.

“Oh, is that the best you have, Kakarot?” Vegeta taunted. “Why, I think if you tickled me you might get more of a reaction!” Goku gasped when Vegeta suddenly grabbed him, holding him tightly in one of his furry hands. “I knew you were a disgrace, Kakarot, but allowing yourself to lose your tail? A Saiyan is taught how to protect their tail from the moment they are born! And you allowed it to be hacked away!” He chortled at that and began to squeeze Goku, causing him to cry out in pain. “Now then, should I just make a fist and see you pop like a pimple? Or maybe it would be more amusing to pull your arms and legs off like-“

Vegeta paused.

“Clever.”

And then he twisted his head up, mouth opening before he fired a GIGANTIC ki beam out of his jaw. The energy ripped through the sky and Goku twisted up in time to see Piccolo get hit just as he began to fire off a Ki blast at the artificial moon Vegeta had thrown into the air. As a result Piccolo’s blast went wide, just grazing the object and causing it to wobble… but it remained in the sky even as Piccolo fell towards the earth. Vegeta instantly reached out, grabbing Piccolo like one may snatch a tossed candy bar, holding him in his other hand.

“Now then…” Vegeta said, slamming his foot down at Tien, causing the triclops to have to dive for cover, “let’s get back to determining how I’ll kill you all!”

~MC~MC~MC~

“Kayos!” Chichi shouted when she saw the mage hurrying up the stairs from Bulma’s lab, a duffle slung over his shoulder. She had thought, after he had told Isco to get the hell out of the compound, that it would be the last place she’d see him. But there he was, even as outside she could hear the bellows and rumbles of the giant monsters battling outside. She had Gohan held tight, face pressed to her shoulder with one of Krillin’s winter caps (‘why did he even bring this?’) pulled down over his face to keep her baby from looking at the artificial moon. “What are you doing here?”

“I’m about to do something that is going to piss off people… but is also our only option.”

At once she fell in step with him. ‘He helped me find my fighting spirit again. He saved Gohan and I from that Agent. Goku and I have a stronger marriage because of him. Whatever he does… I’m with him.’ She didn’t say the words… there was no need to. Instead she just hurried beside him as he went outside to the pool.

Her eyes went wide when Kayos dropped the duffle to the ground, unzipping to reveal the Dragon Balls.

“Kayos… if you do this… another year-“

“Master Roshi can’t be brought back with the Dragon Balls,” Kayos stated. “And neither can Chiaotzu or Krillin or Yamcha. If they die that’s it. And if Piccolo dies then it truly is game over. Our only play is to use these.”

“But what wish can you make?” Chichi asked. “We know that Shenron can’t destroy the Saiyans.” It had been her first suggestion when they’d learned of the Dragon Moon but Goku and the others had explained that Shenron could only do what was within the power level of his creator. Kami couldn’t destroy the Saiyans with a wave of his hand and as such neither could Shenron. Of course she had a sneaking suspicion that Kayos had come up with a few ideas… but for some reason was staying his hand.

“Right. But we can even the odds.” He focused on the glowing balls. “Chichi… I mean it. This is going to seem bad. But in the long run… it will be our greatest chance not just here but against any other foe.”

She considered him for a long moment.

“…do it.”

“Okay.” Kayos threw out his hands. “COME FORTH! ALL MIGHTY SHENRON!”

~MC~MC~MC~

Vegeta cackled as he began to squeeze Goku harder, the young man crying out in pain as his bones began to pop and crack. Piccolo glanced to his left and saw that Raditz had ended up on the ground, unable to get up as Nappa began to just wail on him. The others were trying to help but even with their great size the Saiyans in their Oozaru forms were very nimble and fast, meaning that not only did the Z Fighters’ attacks do little to harm them but they had to watch out lest they be stuck themselves between fists the size of wrecking balls.

“Now then, Kakarot, have you begun to question all your choices that brought you to this moment?” Vegeta taunted. “You are going to die here, along with your brother and your friends! And there isn’t a damn thing you can do about it!”

“Well, you have that right,” Piccolo said, causing Vegeta to turn his head in his direction. “HE can’t.”

And with that he focused… before he began to grow.

Vegeta struggled to hold onto him but soon found his fingers forced open as Piccolo’s body swelled up. Finally the Saiyan Prince dropped him but the fall wasn’t as much as it had been moments earlier, with Piccolo’s feet hitting the ground within a second. He rose up to match Vegeta, looking him right in the eye, a smirk flashing on his features before he slammed his fist right into the Saiyan’s gut, causing him to stumble back and drop Goku.

“Like it?” Piccolo taunted. “Haven’t come up with a name for it yet, but this is the improved Great Namekian Form. Stronger, faster, and with none of the original drawbacks.” He fell into a fighting stance.

Vegeta merely wiped his mouth. “And here I thought you Earthlings would be boring-“

Everyone turned and stared as the sky went dark and Shenron suddenly appeared in the sky.

~MC~MC~MC~

“I AM THE ETERNAL DRAGON! STATE YOUR WISH AND I SHALL GRANT IT!”

I had been thinking over this wish for a while. Ever since I’d learned that the Dragon Moon would grant us a few extra wishes. Focused on the wording to get it JUST right. Shenron had proven to be fair but my knowledge of D’Jinn always had me leery of not thinking over every possible outcome.

But… I had everything covered.

It was time to change the game.

“Almighty Shenron!” I called out. “I wish that all members of the Son Family with Saiyan blood from this day forth be able to regenerator their tails even if they are cut off and have full control of the Oozaru form, choosing when to use it and having full control of themselves in that form!”

It was a risk. Technically two wishes in one. But… I was hopeful that Shenron liked me enough that-

“SO BE IT!” Shenron declared. “YOUR WISH HAS BEEN GRANTED! FARWELL!”

~MC~MC~MC~

Goku blinked in shock as he suddenly felt something he hadn’t felt in years.

He shifted his Gi… and smiled as his long lost tail popped out, wiggling happily.

“Heheh,” he chuckled even as Shenron disappeared and the Dragon Balls launched into the sky, “nice to have you back!” He looked up at the artificial moon… and felt his power grow along with his body.

~MC~MC~MC~

“Okay,” I said with a nod, “now Goku will have an Oozaru form. That should even the odds.” I looked back at the Saiyans and blinked as I saw Piccolo pounding on Vegeta even as Goku began to swell up into his Oozaru form. “Huh… you know, I always forget that Piccolo can do that…”

“Kayos?” Chichi said, sounding utterly distressed. “What… what did you do?”

I sighed as I turned around to face her. “Listen, I know you’re worried for Gohan but trust me, isn’t it better that he can-“

I froze, staring at Chichi.

She looked back, utterly terrified.

Gohan’s tail wiggled.

And behind her…

…Chichi’s Saiyan tail wiggled.

“What the fuck?”

Chapter Text

Chichi was staring at me with terrified eyes, silently pleading with me to explain just what was going on.

Unfortunately… I had no answer.

One moment everything had been fine. I had given Goku and Gohan the ability to regrow their tails and control their Oozaru forms. Even worded it so that Goten could do it and Pan as well. Even as Saiyan blood was watered down they'd be able to grow tails. It was a blessing that would help us out not just against Vegeta and Nappa but any other threats. I had worded it that it had to be the Son family so not to give Raditz the ability; while he seemed to be on our side now I didn't trust him to STAY on our side. And because I had said they needed Saiyan blood there was no risk of Krillin or Bulma suddenly becoming a Saiyan.

And yet… I had messed up.

Because there was Chichi… with a Saiyan tail.

"Kayos… what…"

"i… I don't know…" I looked at Isco. "You heard the wish, did I-"

"No sir," Isco said and I knew things were bad when HE sounded shaken up. "Your wish was perfectly worded."

"It can't be!" Chichi exclaimed, her tail wiggling about in agitation. Gohan blinked his eyes, still worn out from unleashing his power, and Chichi forced him to press his face to her shoulder. "Look at me!"

"I am!" I exclaimed. "King Kai! Kami! I know both of you are watching and can hear me! What the fuck happened?"

'I do not know," Kami told me in my head. 'I agree with your friend Isco… you worded the wish wisely.'

'And its not like Shenron to twist it to screw you guys over,' King Kai added. 'Besides… why would he?'

"I don't know but Chichi didn't start this morning with a tail!"

'…are you sure?' King Kai asked.

"YES HE IS SURE!" Chichi roared. "I am a human! Not a Saiyan!" She looked down at Gohan and paled. "Not that there is anything wrong with… I didn't mean…"

"Its okay, Chichi," I assured her. "We'll figure this-"

The entire building shook.

"Avo!!" Bulma cried out from Isco's speakers. "Are you still in the research facility?"

"Just outside of it," I said. "We have a problem-"

"We certainly do!" Bulma declared. "Vegeta and Nappa know you did something… they saw Shenron grant the wish and now they are moving towards the building! You need to-"

Everything around us began to shake and Bulma was cut off.

"Oh… that can't be good, sir," Isco said just as the building began to collapse right towards us.

~MC~MC~MC~

"Well, look at what we have here," Vegeta said as he stared at Kakarot. His clothes had burst from his body as he had grown larger, his body shifting into the mighty Oozaru. "Nappa! This is going to be entertaining!"

"It sure is!" Nappa taunted even as he held onto Raditz, locking a powerful forearm around the other Saiyan's throat, not allowing him to move. Raditz was of course fighting against him, desperately trying to free himself, but it was doing no good. Nappa simple had him in such an awkward position that there was no way for Raditz to break free of the grapple. "Look at your little brother, Raditz!" Nappa taunted at Kakarot finished his transformation. "He's about to do our job for us!"

Vegeta smirked. 'Only the most skilled of warriors can control their Oozaru form. Raditz took years to be able to look upon the moon and not be lost to his wild animal instincts. Kakarot is far weaker and has no knowledge of his Saiyan bloodline… there is no way he knows how to keep his mind intact.' He watched as the Earth-raised Saiyan finally stopped growing, towering over the trees and the building. 'As he goes on a rampage, murdering these pathetic earthlings, I will attack that structure and find out just how they called out that dragon! It said it had granted a wish… I want to know just what these Earthlings have been hiding!'

"Oh, here it comes!" Nappa said as Kakarot flexed his fingers. He looked over at the Namekian who was watching everything carefully, waiting to make his attack until he saw just what threat would be the greatest. "You know, you might have a chance if you shrank back down! Maybe he'd think you were just a-"

Kakarot suddenly leapt in the air, passing over Vegeta before landing behind Nappa and delivering a punch to the back of his head. Nappa cried out in shocked pain but also let go of Raditz who spun around and bite down hard on Nappa's arm, drawing blood and causing the elder Saiyan to scream in pain before the brothers lashed out with a series of kicks and punches that had Nappa toppling to the ground, dazed and bruised and bloodied.

"Seems like I'm in more control than you thought," Kakarot said, flexing his arm. "In fact… I think I might have more control than YOU do, Nappa."

Vegeta's brow furrowed at that as he took a step forward. "How… how could a low class wretch such as yourself gain such control!?"

"I'm not sure… but I think it might have something to do with my friends… the Earthlings you're always insulting." Kakarot fell into a fighting stance. "And now I'm going to show them that their trust and faith in me wasn't in vain!"

"Or show them how you will die here, just leaving a bigger corpse!" Vegeta roared, rushing at Kakarot. He had hoped that the sudden change in size would cause the low class warrior to be awkward and clumsy, unable to fully fight properly. But Kakarot had adapted insanely quickly to the Oozaru form and he easily dodged Vegeta's attack…

…which caused him to come face to face with the Namekian, who slammed his knee right into Vegeta's gut.

"You'll pay for that!" Nappa roared, storming at the Namekian, catching him around the middle and driving him to the ground. The green-skinned warrior moved to try and push Nappa off but the Saiyan warrior simply was bulkier than the Namekian even in his giant form and was able to slam his knees down against his arms, pinning them to his sides and keeping him from being able to raise them. That had Nappa laughing and his amusement only grew when Vegeta went in to attack Kakarot, preventing him from moving to assist.

"Piccolo!" Kakarot shouted as he and Vegeta locked together, the Saiyan Prince growling as he began to force the low class warrior back away from his downed friend.

"You need to be focused on me, Kakarot!" Vegeta taunted. "You might have learned how to control the might of the Oozaru, but even with the boost it has given you it is still NOTHING compared to my power!" Vegeta squeezed his fingers and Kakarot grunted and grimaced in pain as he slowly found himself forced downward. "That's right… on your knees before you prince! Where you belong! Where all of you belong!" He leered as he leaned in, forcing Kakarot to bend backwards. "None of this would have happened had you just known your place! Now though you are going to watch as Nappa destroys everything you care about, starting with your green friend over there! NAPPA!"

"Aw, but I was enjoying messing with him!" Nappa said as he pulled up the Namekian's head, the way Nappa had his body making the angle awkward and causing him to cry out in pain. Vegeta lessened his grip just enough to allow Kakarot the ability to focus on the Namekian as he grunted in pain. "But yeah, you're right Vegeta… this one is just about done."

He grabbed onto the Namekian's head.

"Let's see what's in that skull of yours!"

~MC~MC~MC~

Chichi stared at Kayos as he struggled to keep the building from falling on top of them.

He'd shouted out 'White Wall!' and caused a pale white barrier to form in front of him, catching the crumbling building that had been her home for the last year. She could see it crashing into the spell, steel and concrete being dashed along the surface, and she could also tell that it was pushing Kayos to the limit. His forehead was beginning to bead with sweat, his muscles were tense, and his body was hunched over as he pushed with all his might, forcing his will into the barrier.

And through it all… she heard Goku's screams.

'All of this… all of this is happening…' she thought as she clutched Gohan to her chest. The threats to her son. The attacks on her husband. The destruction of the place where she and Goku had solidified their marriage and made it into something so wondrous it made her heart burst. All of it was being taken from her…

…because of the Saiyans.

Chichi looked down at Gohan.

"Whatever happens," she said as she let go of Gohan and pushed him towards Isco, "DON'T open your eyes."

And with that Chichi threw her head back.

~MC~MC~MC~

Goku sank to one knee, his hands aching as Vegeta squeezed them again. He'd been trying to rip himself away, to get to Piccolo, but apparently his foe hadn't liked him not focusing all his attention upon him and thus returned to trying to crush his hands. Goku squeezed his jaw shut even as Piccolo began to cry out in pain due to the pressure Nappa was applying to both sides of his head.

'I have to… break free!' Goku thought. 'But Vegeta… I've never met someone so strong! His power… its so beyond mine! But… there has to be away! To save my family… my friends… and avenge Master Roshi-'

Vegeta drove his knee into Goku's chest, making him sputter and cough as he broke out of his thoughts.

"Come now, Kakarot, I don't want you to lose focus just yet! Nappa is about to show your friend the true power of the Saiyan Race!"

"Let him go, Vegeta!"

"But I'm not holding him!" Vegeta taunted. "And besides, if he were truly worth saving he would be strong enough to escape! Same as you!" He bent back Goku's wrists. "Now watch what awaits you if you continue to defy-"

A heavy concrete pillar smashed against Vegeta's head, causing him to cry out as he fell to the ground, releasing his hold. He tried to stand up but the pillar struck again, this time shattering against his skull and drawing blood.

"Get the hell away from my husband!" A new great Ape bellowed.

"…Chichi?" Goku said in shock before whipping around, remembering the peril they were in. He sprang forward, ignoring the pain in his hands as he reached out and grabbed Nappa's jaw and pulled back, causing the invader to cry out. He tried to bite down but Goku pulled harder, forcing his head back and finally ripping him off Piccolo. Chichi, meanwhile, moved over to Raditz who was still dazed from the attack.

"So," Piccolo said, "mind telling me how your wife suddenly has your powers, Goku?"

"I have no idea," Goku admitted, "but right now I'm not going to complain about it. Anything that allows us to have an advantage against Vegeta and Nappa is worth it in my book."

Vegeta got up, rubbing his face while Nappa pressed a fist to the side of his jaw, trying to crack it back into place. "A Saiyan female… so that's what you've been hiding on this planet, Raditz. What, you and your brother decided to share her?"

"That is disgusting," Chichi said, narrowing her eyes as she glared at Vegeta.

"I quite agree. You being forced to breed with these low class pieces of filth. Come here… I am a Saiyan Elite. The Prince of All Saiyans. Your royalty. Join me and I will make you my Queen." He beaconed Chichi to come over to where he stood.

"Never," Chichi snapped.

That caused Vegeta to become angry. "I said come HERE! I am your Prince and you WILL obey me!"

"You are my nothing," Chichi retorted. "Just an invader who has threatened my family."

"You will listen and you will obey!" Nappa roared, launching himself forward.

"Nappa, no!" Vegeta commanded, it clear to Goku that Vegeta's entire mindset had become focused solely on claiming Chichi. But Nappa rushed towards Chichi, hands stretched out as he moved to grab onto her. Goku tensed, lurching forward to stop him.

"KAIOKEN TIMES THREE!"

Nappa let out a gasp as Yamcha suddenly rocketed through the air, body cloaked in crackling burning red ki, slamming right into his chest. The Saiyan let out a cry as he was lifted off the ground before crashing back down, screaming in pain, hand going to his chest as the armor on his back exploded off, Yamcha flying on.

'He… he flew… right THROUGH him!' Goku thought in shock, realizing just what his friend had done.

"You… you little-" Nappa gasped out only for Yamcha to suddenly shoot downward, grabbing onto Nappa's tail and lifting him straight up. Goku winced at that, remembering how much it hurt when his tail was squeezed. He didn't know if Nappa had learned how to block out the feeling but even if he had Goku couldn't imagine it felt good having someone grab you by the tail and lift you clean up into the air.

"I will swat you like a bug!" Vegeta declared, storming forward only for Tien and Chiaotzu to suddenly pop up in front of him. Goku at once shielded his face when he saw them both place their hands near their heads.

"SOLAR FLARE!" the two fighters roared and Vegeta cried out in pain as the blinding light assaulted him, causing him to stumble back.

"Destructo Disc!" Krillin shouted and a large thin disc of energy burst suddenly from the forest, zooming right towards Nappa and, with a sickening 'slurk!' cut right through his tail. Nappa let out a scream even as he fell, his body shrinking down in size as he tumbled to the ground below.

"Damn you!" Vegeta roared, still stumbling about. "When I-"

That's when Bulma attacked.

Her mech raced right at Vegeta, spinning around him before unloading its full payload right at his rear. His armor began to fall off in great chunks, shrinking the moment it was no longer connected to him, but it wasn't that which was Bulma's main focus. Rather it was his tail, her bullets tearing through it, leaving it full of holes and ragged little bits of flesh. Vegeta screamed and roared even as Goku backed away, ready to leap into the fight but also trusting his friends to take the warrior down. Tien and Chiaotzu were peppering him with ki blasts to keep him off balance while Bulma set out every weapon she had.

"NOW ISCO!" Yamcha shouted and Goku looked up to see the droid's Fighting Body hovering near the artificial moon.

"This is one small step for robot," Isco intoned as he slammed his arms together, turning them into a massive laser cannon, "one… giant leap for robotkind!"

He fired and the moon exploded.

At once Goku gasped as he felt his body shrink down, wrapping an arm around Chichi as she also decreased in size and mass. Raditz was right beside them while Piccolo willed himself to return to his normal height; within half a minute they were all back to normal…

"Oh my god!" Chichi screamed, covering herself up. Goku looked down, blinking as he realized he was naked as was his wife.

"Calm down," Piccolo said with a roll of his eyes, holding out his hand. "Magical Materialization!" A beam of energy struck first Chichi and then Goku and at once the slight chill he'd been feeling disappeared.

Goku blinked as he and Chichi suddenly found themselves wearing replicas of Piccolo's own outfit. "Huh… that's neat," he said, patting himself while Chichi let out a sigh of relief. He looked to his wife and smiled. "So… I didn't know you were a Saiyan too, Chichi!"

"I'm not a Saiyan!' Chichi complained.

Raditz though shook his head. "You might not have been before but I can sense it… you have Saiyan blood."

"But I don't want Saiyan blood!" she whined, tail wiggling back and forth.

"Aw, its okay!" Goku said, wrapping an arm around her. "We'll figure it out and-"

"You two can flirt later!" Piccolo snapped. "Vegeta and Nappa are still around."

"Right!" Goku said at once, snapping back to focusing on the battle. "Come on!"

With that the four of them rose and rushed towards where Nappa and Vegeta must have landed.

~MC~MC~MC~

Nappa let out a groan. Or at least he tried too. Instead it became a half groan/half cough, a wad of blood shooting past his lips. It splattered onto the ground as he tried to right himself, staining the dark soil. His fingers clenched and he forced himself to rise only to cry out in pain as he felt the torn up flesh on his left pec stretch and rip. More blood was now pouring onto the ground though not coming from his mouth. He tried to reach for the wound but lifting his hand up caused him to lurk and slam back down onto the ground.

"B…bastards," he got out. He pressed his face against the ground, not caring that rocks were digging into his cheek. "Kill… kill you all."

"You… can't even get up, Nappa."

"Vegeta," he whispered, forcing himself to look up.

"Look at you… because of your failure not only have you been wounded… not only have you lost your tail… but now I have been mangled as well!" He twisted at that and Nappa let out a horrified gasp at the sight of Vegeta's tail. While much of it was the same the base was in utter ruins, with bits of flesh tangling from the multiple holes and gashes that littered it. As such Vegeta didn't even as the strength to lift his tail up, leaving it to drag behind him.

"Vegeta…." Nappa repeated, horrified. "Those filthy humans-"

"No Nappa, it isn't them who are to blame," Vegeta said darkly, limping towards him. Nappa could now see that there were cuts and gashes along the Saiyan Prince's legs, most likely from the human in the robot suit firing upon the base of his tail. "You are."

"I… no Vegeta!" Nappa exclaimed. "I would never hurt you!"

"But you did. Because you were so utterly pathetic, so weak that you couldn't crush those earthlings where they stood, they were able to get their cheap shots on me." He huffed. "And you. Don't deny it… you are bleeding out of your chest. Your tail is completely gone! You are a disgrace!"

Nappa shook his head, reaching out for Vegeta. "No… no we just need to get to some healing pods and we'll be fine. Then we can return and make this right! Crush those earthlings! Kill Raditz and his brother! Claim the Saiyan female!"

"Oh, that will all happen," Vegeta said as he reached down. For a moment Nappa didn't see the Prince but his King. Just a flash but it was there: King Vegeta offering him a hand if he just would submit, giving him a new chance to live and serve. "Just… it won't be the two of us."

The open hand glowed with energy.

"V-Vegeta?" Nappa got out.

"Do you know how much I HATE it when you call me that?" Vegeta snarled. "I am Prince Vegeta… and your disrespect… has come to an end."

"WAIT!" Nappa screamed.

But it was too late. Vegeta fired… and all he knew was agony.

~MC~MC~MC~

"Careful," I warned Bulma as we arrived at the clearing where Vegeta and Nappa were. Or, at least, the clearing where Vegeta was… along with what I could only assume were the atomized remains of Nappa after Vegeta's blast. The gouge that had been cut deep into the earth, still burning in spots and the sandy soil turned to glass spoke of just what Vegeta had done to his partner. "A cornered animal is the most dangerous. We've already lost one person today…"

"Right," Bulma said, checking over her mech suit. It had plenty of damage and one of the arms clearly wasn't working anymore but there was enough that was operational that I was willing to let her approach Vegeta. The others were near us as well, all cautious as they approached.

"Gohan?" Chichi whispered.

"With Isco," I assured her. "He's safe and Isco is flying him away from here… he'll only bring him back the moment one of us gives the all clear."

"Just in case," Isco said from his Fighter Body, "I go offline."

"Thank you," Chichi said in relief before narrowing her eyes, her worries and concerns disappearing as she glared at Vegeta. "Now I can focus on him."

"You… you think you can match me?!" Vegeta snarled. "Me? You pathetic… worthless… meaningless… nobodies!" He threw back his head, an aura of energy blasting out of his body and nearly sending all of us flying. The ground cracked all around him and trees toppled as he unleashed his wrath. "I am SICK and TIRED of all of you thinking you have any hope of matching me! I am VEGETA! PRINCE OF ALL SAIYANS! AND YOU WILL SUFFER FOR DARING TO STAND AGAINST ME!" With that he let out a roar, pulling his hands back. "GALICK GUN!"

"Kame-" Goku began hurriedly, clearly ready to try and intercept the beam with one of his own.

I flew right in front of him.

"Oh this better work…" I muttered.

"FIRE!"

"WHITE FLAG!" I roared just as Vegeta thrust his hands out, my own hands twisting as I activated the Ki capture spell. At once I went stiff as I felt Vegeta's raw power flood through me, making me feel like I had just awoken from a nightmare. My heart was thundering in my chest and I couldn't see around me due to the brightness of the attack and my lungs were freezing up, unable to figure out what to do. I could feel my body straining to contain the blast… it was nothing like I'd ever felt before. When Goku had struck me with the Kamehameha in our battle against Dr. Wheelo I had felt buzzed, energized. But now I felt like every nerve ending was on fire, begging me to stop the spell. But I knew I couldn't… at best stopping would allow Vegeta to strike the others. At worst it would vaporize me.

I grit my teeth and held my hands out in front of me, willing myself to hold on.

"You thought you contain me, Earthling?" Vegeta mocked over the roar of his Galick Gun. "You thought you could match my power? I am VEGETA! There is not a single force on this planet that can match me! Now you can die with all the rest of your pathetic, miserable-"

"Kamehameha!"

A beam of ki fired out, just missing me and striking Vegeta in the shoulder. He cried out, bracing his legs to try and keep from falling over, and unfortunately for me he was still able to keep the Galick Gun going.

"The only miserable one here," Krillin said as he took a step forward, "is you."

"You… you think that-"

Vegeta jerked back as Tien and Chiaotzu attacked with twin Neo Dodon Rays, causing him to skid back slightly as they joined in pushing him back. I felt a small bit of relief but still was struggling to hold the White Flag.

"You… you can't-"

"KAIO-KEN TIMES FIVE!" Yamcha screamed behind me. "Ka…me…ha..me…ha!"

Now Vegeta truly was on the backfoot as another beam shot out just to my right, blasting into Vegeta's chest and causing his legs to wobble.

He didn't even get to say a word before Goku stepped up, firing off his own Kamehameha.

"DOUBLE SUNDAY!" Raditz roared even as Piccolo unleashed the Special Beam Cannon.

"Its okay, Kayos," Chichi assured me as she pressed her hand to my back and I felt some relief come to me as the pain lessened. "We are all here with you…"

"GET SOME!" Bulma roared as her and Isco unleashed their laser cannons on Vegeta.

"Hold on… hold on…" Chichi whispered to me… or perhaps she screamed it. At that point I couldn't tell, thanks to the roar of so many different attacks happening. But I focused, feeling all my muscles tearing from my bones as I struggled-

Vegeta let out a scream, his beam suddenly jerking up and away from me.

"NOW KAYOS!" Goku roared.

"GALICK GUN FIRE!" I shouted as I blasted the ki attack right back at Vegeta. The prince of all Saiyans had only a moment to stare at me in shock before the redirected blast hit in right in the stomach, lifting him off his feet and sending him hurtling through the air, disappearing over the horizon in seconds.

I dropped to my knees, Chichi grabbing hold with glowing hands.

"Healing… abilities…" I got out. Her visage blurred, like I was looking through distorted glass.

"Yeah…" she got out. "I just… reacted… didn't even realize what I was doing." She smiled softly, not bothering to stop as she worked to heal up my muscles.

"WOOHOO!" Krillin cheered. "We did it! We defeated Vegeta!"

"Do you think he's really gone?" Tien asked.

"When I first brought out my mech I hit him with a tracker," Bulma informed us, her suit splitting open to let her out. The entire thing slumped and pieces fell off of it as she did so; there would be no using it a second time, though I had a feeling Bulma wasn't concerned. She would probably take it as chance to upgrade it, learning from the mistakes. "If he does move to come back we'll be ready."

"And we'll be at full strength since we still have the senzu beans!" Yamcha declared only to sway. "Whoa… and… and I think I might…" Goku at once grabbed him, holding him steady.

"Hold on Yamcha!" Goku declared. "You aren't looking that good."

"Chichi…" I groaned out. "Heal him up. I'm good."

"No way man!" Yamcha declared rather forcefully. "Chichi, stay with him."

"What?" I said, frowning at that. I didn't get why he was saying that. "Yamcha, the Kaio-Ken-"

"Is nothing. I just need rest and a senzu. You need that and more!"

I stared at him, blinking. "What?" I repeated.

"You don't know," Piccolo said, sounding surprised. He walked over to a piece of Bulma's mech and ripped it off, rubbing it with the front of his shirt before bringing it over for me to stare at.

It took me a moment to realize that he wanted me to see my reflection.

Even longer to realize that what I was seeing WAS my reflection.

My face was a mass of bruises and burns. My left eye was nearly swollen shut, which exclaimed why it hurt to blink. I had a busted open lip and cuts on my cheeks. My clothing was torn to shreds and the skin on my chest and arms was deep red with spots of black. My hands were curled up tight, looking more like claws than fingers.

"…fuck," I whispered as Piccolo took the metal away.

"You took the brunt of his blast," Chichi whispered, rubbing my back, still channeling healing magic into me. It made me a touch frightened what I must have looked like, if this was my visage with her healing me. "He turned Nappa to dust with it."

"Not my… smartest move."

"It was reckless and stupid," Piccolo snorted. "I keep telling you, you aren't a fighter. You are a sneak."

"Hey, lay off him!" Krillin declared.

"I meant it in the best possible way," Piccolo stated. "And what do you care? I at least like him. You think he'll poison us."

"Well… not anymore," Krillin said before walking over to me. "Anyone who jumps in front of my family to save us… well, they are okay in my book." He moved to pat me on the shoulder before realizing there really wasn't a good place to touch me at all. He finally settled for a nod and I did my best to return it. "Still think he spends way too much thinking how to hurt but…" He shot me a look and I tried to chuckle at that only to groan.

"Don't worry guys, we'll all be right as rain soon!" Goku declared. "Thanks to Kayos and Chichi we still have plenty of senzu beans for Kayos and Yamcha! And the rest of us just need to heal up a bit. Relax for a few days."

We all stared at Goku in shock.

"What?"

"YOU are suggesting resting?" Tien said.

"Heheheh," Goku chuckled, blushing a touch. "I guess that doesn't sound much like me, now that I think about it!" He took a breath and grew more serious. "But yeah… we all need to rest. If Korrin can get us more senzu beans great but I'd rather hold onto them, just in case." His mood grew even more gloomy. "And… we need to do something about Master Roshi."

The gang grew all solemn at that but my mind was racing. 'He died once. Can't be brought back even with the Dragon Balls. But he can with the Namekian ones… I just don't know how to tell the gang about them. Maybe using the Scroll? But what if it suggests another option? And would that be a bad thing? If there is another way, one that doesn't risk Namek, maybe we should take it? Yeah, would be nice to have a second set of Dragon Balls but-'

My arms flared with white magic.

"Kayos!" Bulma cried out and I let out a strangled cry of pain as the magic began to flare around me. A new pain flooded my system and I felt the wounds Chichi had been healing break open once more as I fought back a scream. "What's happening?"

"Fool saved the world!" I heard Baba declare as I curled in on myself. "Do you idiots realize how much good magic he just created for himself protecting this planet? He's going to have to do a lot of evil deeds if he is determined to stick with keeping a balance!" There was a pause. "Aw, he'll be okay… this is going to hurt him like a bitch until he's processed all that magic!"

I didn't have time to respond to that as the world went white and all I could do was pray it would be over soon.

~MC~MC~MC~

Vegeta groaned as he hauled himself out of the crater he'd landed in. Old lessons he'd been taught, ones he hadn't used in years, flooded back to him.

'Assess your injuries first. Even if a threat is coming you must know how hurt you are and where. You can't fight back if you don't know what will work and what won't. Only a fool goes into a battle unprepared and that includes your body.'

The comment was so odd. He couldn't place who had said it. Of course that might have been because his brain felt like it was about to burst out of the back of his skull.

'Concussed,' he thought to himself, raising his arm to shield his eyes against the light of the star that warmed the stupid planet. But that act caused his stomach to lurch and Vegeta twisted to the side, vomiting upon the ground. Some of it sprayed onto his boots and that just made him angrier, a snarl ripping through his throat that only made it hurt worse thanks to it aggravating the already tender muscles that were now soaked in bile. 'Damn it all,' he thought as he stumbled against step, falling to his hands and knees. 'Get up!'

His body betrayed him and sent him toppling forward, landing on the ground face first. Something cut into his cheek and he could feel warm blood oozing onto his skin. He rolled to try and get into a more comfortable position but that only caused him to scream in pain when he jostled his right shoulder.

'Dislocated… more likely broken,' he thought. 'Get up… get up and kill them all.'

He just laid there.

'Never fight on someone else's terms. Only fight when YOU are ready to fight. And if you can't you do all you can to make them your terms again.'

'Stupid fucking voice,' Vegeta thought. Or maybe he mumbled it. He couldn't be for sure. In any case he was realizing that the fight was over and much to his own bitterness he had lost. Been utterly beaten by the humans.

It didn't matter that they had ganged up on him. Vegeta had fought on countless planets where he had to take on entire battalions. Armies. Once an entire hive mind that controlled every person on the entire planet, so that they functioned like a single entity. And he'd never been beaten. He'd always won! And it wasn't a 'scrape by with the win' sort of victory. He hadn't had a fight where he'd felt the threat of defeat since he was 13 years old and that was only because he'd sought out the challenge! And yet the earthlings had done it. They had driven him back and injured him and prevented him from claiming victory.

'They are probably celebrating right now,' he thought darkly. 'Raising toasts to their defeat of me! Thinking that I've crawled off to die in some hole!'

That got him to shift up, even as his head spun and his stomach whined in protest. He coughed, sending a wad of acidity goo to the ground, and went for the control of his pod before remembering that it was in his right pocket.

Vegeta groaned.

It took 10 minutes of wiggling but he was finally able to reach with his left hand and retrieve the remote. It felt like hours and every second that passed by saw him cursing the humans… and especially cursing the Sons of Bardock.

"Low… class… filth," he ground out as he pressed the button. He waited, knowing that if the remote had been broken he would be done for. He wasn't going to heal properly lying on Earth's muddy ground. He HAD to get to a Frieza Station. Find a healing pod. Get to one of the medic. Get patched up and fixed up and then he could make his next move.

After several long moments the remote beeped and Vegeta rolled his head back and let out a sigh.

'I should have never tried to speak with them,' he thought bitterly as he waited for the pod to show up. 'That was my mistake… treating them like creatures worthy of sharing words with me. I won't make the same mistake again. I'm going to get healed up and then I will return and reduce this planet to glass. And then-'

And then.

That was the question.

'My plans to deal with Frieza have been reduced to ashes because of those fools! Raditz has allied with these Earthlings and will DIE for what he has done. And Nappa…'

Nappa.

Vegeta… Vegeta didn't know what to feel concerning Nappa. He had been a part of his life for so long that he couldn't remember a time when he hadn't had the other Saiyan looming behind him, desperate to show how well he could please him. Making his suggestions and preparing things for them…

'I suppose I'll have to do it on my own,' Vegeta thought. 'It can't be that hard. Nappa did it after all!' He turned his head as he heard a whooshing and shut his eyes in relief when he saw the pod land a couple yards away from him. Vegeta slowly rose to his knees, pushing off the ground only to topple back down. 'He was just holding me back, the bastard. A weakling, just like Raditz. He couldn't handle those earthlings at all… he just kept distracting me, needing me to save him time and again! Whimpering and whining about Saiyan Honor and Saiyan Pride… as if I do not have both of those already! I am Vegeta, the Prince of All Saiyans! I don't need him playing nursemaid for me!'

He dragged himself into the open pod, biting back a scream of pain as he settled in the seat, feeling his tail scrape against the seat. He squeezed his eyes shut and focused on his breathing, remember how Nappa had taught him to do that to ignore-

It didn't matter.

None of it mattered.

'Better this way,' as he activated the pod's door, letting it seal shut. 'Now I can train how I want. Not have that bald bastard telling me to rest or to slow down. I'll build up my strength, break past my limits, and return to this planet on my own to get my revenge. I'll claim Kakarot's bride and at long last will become the King of All Saiyans. And there is nothing on this planet that will be able to stop!'

~MC~MC~MC~

"Hmmm… finally awake I see," Piccolo said as I shuffled into the common room. "And here I thought you'd waste the day lying in bed."

"Unlike Namekians I can't rip off parts of me that are hurt and regrow them," I commented, though I was careful not to make my comment too biting. With the threat of the Saiyans gone there was always a chance that Piccolo would decide the time for alliances was over and he should begin tearing into all of us. "I also got a bit confused waking up in a room I didn't recognize and walking down halls I've never been down before. Threw me off."

Piccolo stared at me for a moment before saying, in a surprisingly soft voice, "The Research Facility was destroyed during the attack. Bulma considered bringing some capsules for housing but in the end we decided it would be better to head to Capsule Corps. Rooms are better set up for all we need and it also would give you the medical attention that you might have needed."

I frowned at that, rubbing my bare forearms. "Did I need medical attention?"

"No," Piccolo said with a slight smirk. "We forced a senzu between your lips. Goku got a bit worried that you didn't instantly wake up but Baba explained that your body needed time to adapt to all the new magic you gained."

"Right," I said. "That's gonna be… interesting." I held out my hand and focused on lighting up a single finger with white magic.

The glow nearly blinded me.

"Fucking hell!" I roared, snuffing the magic out. Piccolo grunted, lowering his arm he'd raised to shield his eyes, and shot me a dark look. "I didn't think it would be that bad!" I complained. I waved my hand like I had stuck it in a pot of hot water. "Damn it all, I was going for as low as I could!"

"It's a power boost!" Goku declared, popping his head in from what I assumed was the kitchen. He had a platter of meatballs, each one with a toothpick stuck in it and dripping with sauce, and even as he looked at me he popped three more into his mouth, spitting out the toothpicks before he quickly munched them down. "I've had the same thing happen… you suddenly get a power boost and have to figure out how to deal with it."

"This is a little different than what you've gone through, Goku," Piccolo replied with a roll of his eyes. "Or any of us really."

"Uh," I said, raising my hand, "someone mind cluing me in? Because this is my life and I'm getting a bit nervous about how you guys are throwing around the word 'big'."

"But none of us said the word big," Goku replied fully entering the room. He held out the platter and motioned for me to take a meatball.

I did only to realize what had just happened.

"Oh god, I'm dying aren't it?"

"What?!" Goku exclaimed. "You are? But Bulma and Baba said you were fine!"

Before I could say a word Goku rocketed out of the room, screaming for help, and Piccolo glanced over at me and huffed. "Wonderful, you just scared him."

"HIM!?" I exclaimed. "I'm terrified!"

"Why do you think you are dying?"

"HE OFFERED ME FOOD!"

Piccolo… began to laugh.

No a chuckle. Not a snicker.

An honest to god laugh.

It was terrifying.

"Oh… oh this is hilarious." He let out a long breath… before he began laughing again.

"I am so glad my impending death is at least giving you some entertainment."

"You aren't dying," Bulma said as she came into the room… or rather was pushed into the room by a panicked Goku.

"Are you sure?" Goku asked desperately. "Because you said he was fine and then Kayos said he was dying-"

"Because you gave up some of your food, Goku!" I exclaimed. "I assumed that was the mark of death!"

Bulma glanced over at Goku, raising an eyebrow. "Okay, that does explain your panic, Kayos. Especially if no one told you that those meatballs were marked for you, in case you wanted something. Normally a senzu leaves you not needing to eat anything for days but we weren't for sure how your magic would react to it… sometimes Goku gets a senzu and the first thing he wants is lunch."

"To be fair that is just Goku," Piccolo argued.

"So, are you hungry Kayos?" Goku asked, eyeing up the meatball.

"No, but thank you Goku," I said, relieved that I wasn't going to die a horrible death. "So… I'm just… supercharged?"

"Far more than that!" Baba declared, popping up from behind the couch.

"JESUS, WOMAN!" I shouted, pressing my hand to my chest. "Don't fucking do that!"

"You should have been able to sense me! We'll need to work on your magical detection next."

I glowered at her. "Goodie. So… mind telling me exactly WHAT is up with me then?"

Baba scoffed. "I told you when we first started that doing good deeds or evil deeds increases your good and evil magic. Are you really so stupid to think that saving the world and everyone on it wouldn't boost your good magic to insanely high levels?"

"…not really," I admitted. "I mean, its just the right thing to do-"

"Idiot!" Baba said, throwing a pillow at my head. "Every single person on this planet, save for the people in this ugly building-" Bulma let out a yelp of protest at that, "-owes you their lives! That is a lot of goodness that just got pumped into you!"

"Okay, okay!" I complained. "So saving the world results in good magic overload. What exactly are we looking at, then?"

"A lot of training!" Baba declared. "You are going to have to relearn every one of your white magic spells, so you don't overpower them. We also need to begin amping up your evil magic, assuming you are still going with this foolish notion that you are the 'silver sorcerer'." She made sure to pump as much derision as she could into those two words.

"I am. Never leave a tool on the table." I looked to the others. "So I guess I'll be doing a lot of training."

"That's great!" Goku declared. "And hopefully soon you'll understand your powers enough that we can spar!"

"…yay," I said dryly. Rolling my head back and forth I looked at the others. "So… we have a lot to talk about, I guess. MY magic boost. The return of your tail Goku. Figuring out what the hell happened to Chichi. Preparing for Vegeta's return, if he does return. And what you are going to do now, Piccolo."

"What I'm going to do now?" he asked.

"You helped us save the world," I said. "And you are welcome to help us keep saving the world. But I also understand if you want to go off on your own now."

"Piccolo would never do that!" Goku declared. "He's one of us now! He's one of our greatest fighters!"

"I will-" Piccolo began only for Goku to continue on.

"And Gohan would really miss you! I mean, if you want to spend some time training on your own you can but you have gotten so much stronger training with us!"

Piccolo looked utterly flustered by all of Goku's comments, backing away slowly like his praise were swinging swords. He opened his mouth to speak-

"BULMA!" Krillin shouted, racing into the room, Tien, Yamcha, and Chiaotzu just behind them. "BULMA!"

"What is it?" Bulma asked. "What's the big deal, Krillin? Kayos needs his rest-"

"Not with this news!" Krillin exclaimed. "You know how you told us to go get the dragon balls?"

"Yeah, what about it?"

"They are all in one place!" Krillin declared.

"One… place?" I said slowly. "That means-"

Krillin nodded, swallowing. "Someone has already gathered them."

~MC~MC~MC~

"I AM THE ETERNAL DRAGON! STATE YOUR WISH AND I SHALL GRANT IT!"

The figure smirked, his mouth lined with only a few teeth, his wrinkled features twisting as he grinned. "Return me to the prime of my youth."

"YOUR WISH HAS BEEN GRANTED! FAREWELL!"

But the figure didn't even watch as the Earth Dragon disappeared, instead laughing as he felt his old withered body regain the strength and vitality he'd once had. He looked at his hands, watching as the gnarled things swelled up even as his fingers uncurled, the pain that had caused them to constantly ache even as they bent into useless clawing things disappearing. He was able to stand up straight, the blurriness that had affected his eyes fading away. He felt his power raising as he no longer needed to channel all his energy into keeping his broken body moving.

"YES! YES! LORD SLUG THE ALMIGHTY HAS RETURNED!"

Next Time

Lord Slug

Chapter Text

Last time on Chaos Theory Z! Avo Kayos helped Son Goku and his friends to drive back the evil Saiyan warriors Vegeta and Nappa who had come to destroy all life on Earth. There was much pain and strife but they managed to defeat the two of them thanks to skill and trickery. Now though they deal with the grim realization that Master Roshi is gone, unable to be wished back with the Dragon Balls.

But even as they consider all of that the actions of fucking Edwin Chaos during some multiverse bullshit has caused the power of Filler Arcs to enter into this world!

“Hey!” Edwin Chaos said suddenly from another universe, looking up from his bed on the KaibaCorp Blimp and glowering at the narrator. “I didn’t choose to do that! And who the fuck is Avo Kayos!?!”

Thanks to that egotistical moron rather than continuing on with our adventure, Son Goku, Avo Kayos, and Chiaotzu (the three most important characters in this story, in my opinion) must now deal with… a Christmas Filler arc. Also, did you read this in LittleKuriboh’s narrator voice? Or the original Dragon Ball Z narrator voice? Because you should have read it in Taylor Swift’s voice. That’s right, its me, Taylor Swift. That’s why all you Swifties should make this the most popular DBZ fanfic on the site!

“Huh,” I said as I looked at my phone. The Z Fighters, recovering from the battle with the Saiyans, were all hanging out at Capsule Corp; unfortunately our little island paradise had been destroyed by Vegeta and Nappa (and, well, us, but we blamed those two for all the damage when it came to filling out the insurance forms). Bulma had discussed it with all of us and decided that it would be rebuilt as, thanks to the year we’d spent on the island training there, the place had become like a second home for all of us.

But with it currently torn apart we had all decided that Capsule Corp would be the best place for everyone to gather; Goku’s home was too small, no one wanted to go back to Kame House without Master Roshi there, and I honestly couldn’t say where I lived thanks to not being of this world until little over a year ago and that entire time been bumming beds off Bulma. Not that anyone other than Kami and possibly Mr. Popo knew that. Bulma had been more than welcoming and we were all currently hanging out at the pool. Chichi was working on her tan, having been utterly thrilled that thanks to all her training she no longer fit in her bathing suit… in the best possible way, with it being too baggy… and thus had gone with Bulma and gotten a new two piece. Bulma as well was lounging in the sun, a set of ear buds in place to let her listen to a book on tape. Thanks to Roshi not being there to peep both women felt comfortable lounging. Tien and Krillin were with Dr. Brief working on getting the grill going while Chiaotzu and Yamcha were both relaxing on inflatable rafts.

“See, like this,” Raditz said gruffly as he floated on top of the water. “Its all about spreading out your body and using your ki to get yourself balanced.”

“Oooooh!” Gohan declared as he tried to mimic his uncle. While we’d taught Gohan how to swim Raditz had, surprisingly enough, been horrified that Gohan didn’t know how to ‘lounge’ properly and decided to teach him himself. And… he proved to be a patient teacher, much to my surprise. I had thought for sure he would be short tempered and snapping at the boy but apparently it dawning on him that he had a nephew had sparked the drive to show the boy some kindness.

“What’s up, Kayos?” Goku said, paddling over to the edge of the pool.

“I was looking at my calendar and I realized it’s the 25^th in two days. Lost all track of time.”

“25^th… OH!” Goku exclaimed, eyes going wide. “We almost missed your birthday!”

I smiled at that; Goku might seem forgetful at times but there were certain things he ALWAYS remembered. And while the anime had never shown it I was finding that birthdays were things that he had engrained in his gray matter. He knew whenever everyone’s was and he was VERY insistent on making sure they were celebrated in some way. He’d even figured out when Piccolo had hatched from his egg and declared it his ‘hatchday’, much to the Namekian’s bemusement.

“We kind of were dealing with things, Goku,” I said. He had been rather upset last time when he’d realized we’d missed my birthday in the shuffle of getting to the island; I’d gotten a belated party 5 months later.

“That’s no excuse!” Goku declared. “Guys! Its Kayos’ birthday!”

“Oh my!” Bulma’s mother said, pressing her hands to her mouth as she came over with an ice chest full of beers and pops. “Why, that won’t do if we don’t do anything! Honey!” She waved to Dr. Brief. “We need to set up a birthday party!”

“Of course, sweetie!” Dr. Brief said happily. “Bulma, what do you think we should get Kayos?”

“We can’t discuss it in front of him, dad!” Bulma teased. “Kayos, cover your ears.”

“Guys, its fine!” I assured them. “My birthday always gets lost in the shuffle.”

“Always?” Krillin said and I was startled at how… upset… he sounded at that. “Everyone always forgets it?”

“Well, not EVERYONE but its never been that big of a deal. Christmas kind of dominates things.”

“Christmas?” Goku said, tilting his head.

“Huh, I forgot about Christmas too,” Bulma said. “It would be on your birthday, wouldn’t it?”

“Eeyup,” I said, popping the P in the word.

“And you don’t mind that?” Tien asked.

I shrugged. “Never minded it. For a few years I wasn’t… well, I didn’t HATE Christmas but I wasn’t someone that went all out celebrating it but that changed. Honestly this last year was the first time I didn’t really celebrate. But I don’t mind it being on the same day.”

“So we could do a Christmas Birthday Party!” Chiaotzu exclaimed.

Somewhere I knew my dad was grinding his teeth in frustration at that; HE was born on the 24^th and HATED when his birthday and Christmas got merged. Me I didn’t mind but him?

“Oh, that would be a lovely idea!” Chichi said, already getting up. “We don’t have a lot of time so we’ll need to get started right away.”

Bulma’s mother nodded. “Now, the cake should be shaped like something…”

“Or two cakes… a birthday cake and a Christmas cake,” Chichi suggested, already moving to get changed, Mrs. Brief following after her.

“I suppose we should go get some presents,” Krillin said before glancing at Bulma.

The blue haired scientist sighed. “Yes, I’ll loan you some money.”

“Thanks Bulma!” Krillin said before going back to working on the burgers and hot dogs he was grilling up.

“You know we don’t have to do this right now!” I called out only for Isco, in his fighting form, to place a hand on my shoulder.

“They wish to honor the moment you burst out of your mother’s chest, sir. Let them have this.”

“…that’s not how babies are born, Isco. You are thinking of Xenomorphs.”

“Are you sure? I am pretty sure that the creation of you fleshbags involves face huggers.”

“Only if the woman has a supportive partner,” I teased.

Raditz frowned as he came over to the side of the pool, leaning against it alongside his brother. It was very odd to see him with wet hair… in that his hair didn’t look wet at all. It had the exact same pokeyness and volume. Like washing a Ken doll. “Wait… what is this Christmas you speak of?”

“Hmmmpf,” Piccolo said with a sniff. “I guess you wouldn’t know, would you?”

“As if you do?” Isco challenged mockingly, causing Piccolo to seize up. “By all means, Piccolo, explain it to Raditz. We are all willing to wait and hear what you have to say.”

Piccolo… merely folded his arms and turned away from us.

“Thought so,” Isco stated. “Christmas is a holiday celebrated by Christians, Raditz. It celebrates the birth of their Savior.”

“Huh… guess that makes sense. Lots of cultures celebrate the birth of great warriors.” He looked at Goku. “So when do they celebrate your birthday on this planet?”

“What?!?!” Goku exclaimed. “They don’t celebrate my birthday!”

“Even though you’ve saved them countless times?” Raditz demanded. He glowered when Goku just shrunk down at that. “Ungrateful wretches.”

“Oh, come on Raditz!” Goku said in a panic. “I just don’t need to be treated like that!”

Raditz didn’t seem entirely convinced. “Well… maybe.” It clearly didn’t sit well with him that his brother wasn’t worshipped on Earth. Part of it might have been his upbringing but I also had a feeling much of it was simply that for Raditz he didn’t like that his brother wasn’t given the respect he felt he deserved. It was touching, honestly. In a galactic overlord sort of way but still.

“Well, Christmas doesn’t celebrate the birth of a warrior anyway,” I said. “At least not in the traditional sense. He was a peacemaker. Someone who sought to bring love and tolerance and understanding to the world. There was anger in him, that much we know, but more often he worked to help the world.”

“Huh,” Goku said, tilting his head. “So a warrior who didn’t want to fight… man, I wish I could have fought him.”

I shut my eyes and counted to five. “Jesus didn’t fight, Goku.”

“But he was powerful?”

“Very.”

“So he was so powerful he didn’t even need to fight!” Goku exclaimed. “I bet he had all sorts of secret moves he could perform.”

“Well,” Isco began.

“Don’t you dare,” I warned my friend.

But Isco merely continued on. “He did manage to resurrect himself.”

“HE WHAT?!?!” Goku exclaimed.

Isco nodded. “In fact according to the scriptures of Kayos’ belief-“ And I squirmed at that; it was against my personal beliefs to discuss such things openly and even if it wasn’t me but Isco talking about them I was feeling HIGHLY awkward with him chatting so casually about it, “-after he died he spent three days in Hell battling demons. Many claim he CHOSE to die just so could save the souls of those who had been cast unfairly into Hell and bring them to Heaven.”

“He did that WILLINGLY!?!” Goku exclaimed. “Went to Hell and fought demons!?”

Yamcha, who I hadn’t realized was listening in, spoke up. “Man, he must have been really powerful then. Kami and King Kai both warned me that the absolute worst of the worst dwell in Hell. Horrible, awful, stupid, disgusting beings.”

“Well, except Towa,” I said under my breath. “She’s smart and beautiful.”

~MC~MC~MC~

Towa, who had decided to use her magic to spy on the champions of Earth, especially when the latest soul to enter Hell, some brute called Nappa, had ranted and raved about some new magic user, tilted her head at that.

“Hmmm… you aren’t so bad yourself,” she said with a smirk, staring at Kayos.

~MC~MC~MC~

“And this Jesus guy really went down there and fought them? And not only won but was able to come back to life ALL ON HIS OWN!?!” Goku grinned. “Man! I wish I could have sparred with him!”

“Goku,” I said slowly, “Jesus wasn’t a fighter. He was just a normal person.” I frowned. “Well, okay, he wasn’t a normal person…”

“What do you mean?”

Once more I shifted uneasily. “Uh…”

“Kayos?”

“Its… kind of against my beliefs to discuss all this,” I admitted.

“But I can discuss it,” Isco said, stepping in; I wasn’t sure if that was a good thing or a bad thing. “Jesus is said to be the son of God, who was sent to Earth to aid humanity. He had many great abilities and a commanded the attention of others. Eventually he did die but he came back to life before finally ascending one final time.”

“…oh!” Goku said, bobbing his head. “I get it now!”

“Why do I think you don’t?” I asked softly.

“I get it!” Goku repeated… before pointing at Piccolo. “Jesus was a Namekian!”

“…what?” I said flatly.

“So is he your cousin, Piccolo? Or would he be your nephew? And why didn’t you tell me you were related to another really strong fighter.”

“Uh…” Piccolo said, just as lost as I was.

“Goku… what are you talking about?” I asked.

“Jesus. He’s a Namekian. Its sooooooo obvious!”

“…explain,” I demanded flatly.

“Well, you said he was the son of god, right? So that must mean he’s Kami’s kid!” Goku turned to Piccolo. “I didn’t know that Kami had a son!”

“I… didn’t know either.” Piccolo frowned turning his head away from us. ‘Could he though? Its possible… perhaps he is worried that his advanced age risks the Dragon Balls, even with the end of the Dragon Moon coming. But Kayos made it sound like this child was born in the past… could he be Kami? Or perhaps a hidden Namekian that Kami has been keeping away from us, that way he can-‘

“Hey!” I snapped, jabbing a finger at Piccolo. “None of that!”

“W-what?” Piccolo said, startled.

“None of that ‘Goku might be right’ crap! He isn’t right.” I turned to Goku. “Jesus was not a Namekian.”

“Are you sure? Because you said he was the son of god. And that he had amazing powers-“

“Jesus didn’t grow 50 feet and rampage!”

Isco made a coughing sound which was odd considering he didn’t have a throat. “There was the money changers in the-“

“NO!” I roared, glaring at him.

“And you said that he was really good at gathering allies and Piccolo is great at making friends!” Goku said.

“He walked on water,” Isco suggested. “That could just be a ki technique.”

“Oh yeah!” Goku said happily. “And he died and went to Hell… that is something I could see a Namekian doing to help out the innocent! And then someone used the Dragon Balls to wish him back to life before he went to the Lookout!”

I threaded my fingers through my hair, tugging at the strands. “This is so fucking painful.”

“Then stop doing that,” Raditz said and I wondered if he was being cute or really was that fucking stupid.

“It was said as well that Jesus was very humble, something we know from our good friend Piccolo and from Kami to be a fact,” Isco replied.

“I will turn you into a fucking toaster!” I roared.

Goku laughed. “Come on Kayos, is it really that big of a deal?”

“…yes!” I shouted before catching myself. “Well, okay, if he was a Namekian I- no, no we are not going down that route.” I looked skyward. ‘Kami, tell them you don’t have a fucking kid!’

It took a moment but the Guardian of Earth spoke. ‘I do not remember ever producing an offspring.’

“See?”

But that’s when Mr. Popo spoke up. “Yes but remember that time a few millennia back where, because of the Harmonious Convergence, you were allowed to safely walk the Earth with no fear of any harm coming to you or the Lookout? You did go on a bit of a bender that week.’

‘Ah… yes…’ Kami sounded contrite. ‘I don’t remember all of it but-‘

‘Lalala, lalala, lalalalala!’ I declared, mentally singing Jingle Bells.

~MC~MC~MC~

“Thank you Kayos for helping us get presents for everyone,” Chichi said with a smile as she, Gohan, Isco, and I walked through the mall.

“And I’m sure you asking me to help has NOTHING to do with you sending the others with that list that said ‘Avo’s Birthday Presents’ on it,” I said dryly.

Chichi, for her part, merely smirked. “Nothing at all.”

“Of course.”

We had decided to keep it simple and just remain in West City to do all our shopping. I had been firm that yes, while it was my birthday and I was all for a party and presents, if the gang was interested in celebrating Christmas we should do that too. Gohan had of course been interested but the rest of the gang had been excited when they’d learned that it involved food, peaceful partying, and presents. A chance for all of us to express to everyone just how we felt about one another.

“Chichi,” I said, trying to think of how to politely word things, not wanting to insult her in the slightest as I knew she was a prideful woman, “if you need to get a loan I am more than willing…”

Chichi though shook her head. “Thank you, Kayos but we’ll be fine. Daddy apparently had a VERY good radish harvest and was able to send us plenty of money. And since Bulma has been covering the grocery bill this last year we were able to save quite a bit!”

“Still, let me know.”

“But only from YOUR amount, sir,” Isco reminded me.

“Yes Isco,” I snarked. “You need to save up for your army.”

“Indeed. Soldiers of fortune are so expensive.” He shook his head. “Though I am also thinking of getting another body… while this one is fine for fighting, “ he gestured at his secondary form, which we’d managed to convince him to cover up a bit with clothing (a pair of jeans like mine, some boots, and a Christmas sweater), “I do miss my true original form. So a third form that is a duplicate would be nice.”

“Maybe a bit smaller?” I suggested. “That way you could use that to get into tight spots and weave through crowds.”

“Hmmm… perhaps…”

“Mommy,” Gohan said, tugging his mother’s sleeve. “Who is that?”

Chichi looked over and frowned. “I’m not sure…”

I followed their gaze and smiled. “That would be Santa,” I told Gohan, squatting down to address him at eye level. “Before Christmas he travels the world, meeting with Children and finding out what they might want for Christmas. And if they are VERY good he gets with his elves and has them make presents for the children and brings them on Christmas Eve night.”

“Wow…”

Chichi and I shared a look. “Would you like to meet him?”

“I… can I?” Gohan said nervously. We nodded and soon found ourselves in line, Gohan nervously shifting from foot to foot

“So he’s like the Dragon Balls?” Chichi asked.

“Kind of,” I said. “Santa has his limits… self imposed. He mostly focuses on children and his gifts are about bringing joy. What kind of joy that is depends on the child though… some need practical things. What good is a toy if a child really needs a warm coat? But he does prefer to try and give every child also something a bit more… jolly.”

“Hmmm,” Chichi said as Gohan approached Santa, smiling a bit shyly but allowing the man to lift him up onto his knee.

“Merry Christmas. Now… what is your name?”

“Son Gohan, Mr. Santa,” Gohan said gently.

“And have you been a good boy this year?”

Gohan nodded. “I… I helped my mommy and daddy save the whole world.”

“The whole world!” Santa said with a laugh. “That was very good then! Very good. And you promise to be a good boy this year?”

Gohan nodded.

“Well then… what would you like for Christmas?”

Shifting a bit Gohan squared his shoulders before saying in a firm voice, “Could…could you bring Master Roshi back?”

My heart sank.

“Oh no,” Chichi whispered.

“Sir,” Isco said, “I am tapped into the alarms. I can set them off-“

But before Isco could give us a chance to extract Gohan Santa let out a rumble of thought. “Well… that is a tall order, Gohan. A tall order. One that might take more than one Christmas to fulfill. But-“

And he turned.

And stared.

Right.

At.

Me.

“I think… that can be arranged.” His eyes fucking twinkled and I felt my heart lurch.

~MC~MC~MC~

“Happy Birthday!” Everyone cried out as I entered the room and saw that it looked like a mishmash of birthday party and Christmas party. There was a tree and garland and lights but also helium balloons in all colors and a Happy Birthday banner and all manner of presents littered about the room.

“Thanks guys,” I said as I hugged Bulma and then turned to Goku who lifted me up as he gave me a squeeze.

“Well… you deserve it,” Krillin said and I gave him a slight nod; it was a start.

What followed was a whirlwind of activity. Presents being open (both the Christmas and Birthday variety). Gohan got a GO Board and pretty soon Tien was teaching him to play. Raditz looked utterly awkward as he came back in wearing the black gi with orange trim that Goku had gotten him though I could tell he was touched when Goku showed that his patch had the kanji for Son on it, marking Raditz as officially part of the family. “We don’t do family names on Planet Vegeta… but I think the old man would have liked Son for us” had been his reply.

Dr. Brief pulled out a piano and him and Mrs. Brief began to play holiday music, everyone happily singing along when they knew the words. Piccolo had tried to remain aloof but Yamcha had surprised everyone by giving him the best gift: a travel guide all about the most amazing places on Earth. We’d later caught him tucked away near the fire, happily reading while petting one of the Brief Family cats.

Bulma was instantly upgraded in status to mine, in Isco’s eyes, when she presented him a new mini drone body.

I chuckled as I ate a piece of cake, watching as Goku and Chichi found themselves under the mistletoe and Goku, with no prompting, gave her a kiss before just standing there, holding his wife with a faint smile on his lips.

“Well… I gave canon a kick to the nuts… but I think it was worth it.”

“I agree,” Piccolo rumbled behind me.

I didn’t bother to turn around. “Everyone happy and at peace, if even for a single day. That’s… that’s good.”

“Yes it is. And Avo… thanks for the birthday party.”

“Well, I should be thanking-“

I turned and saw it wasn’t Piccolo I was speaking with.

No, it was another Namekian. One with long brown hair, a beard, and wearing long cream colored robes.

“…uh…” I said slowly.

“Well… time to go,” he said before he disappeared in a swirl of sparkles, the same sound as the teleporter from Star Trek playing.

“…uh….”

Chapter Text

“Huh… air isn’t as thin as I thought it would be.”

The others all turned and stared at me… only to wince at how bright the protection spells I’d cast on myself were. I had wanted some time to deal with my sudden power boost but the danger of someone collecting all the Dragon Balls meant we had needed to hurry to the Lookout, in hopes that Kami might have the answers.

“What?” I complained, gesturing at the open sky that loomed all around us. “We are on the highest point in the world. At least I assume we are.”

“We are, Sir,” Isco stated. He was using his fighter body, as he had commented that he was thinking about finding a way to bury his actual form deep in the center of the earth so he could never risk being destroyed again. I decided not to mention how often the Earth got destroyed… mostly because other than Kami no one else knew that I was from another universe. That and I had no idea what harebrain scheme Isco would come with in reponse. “We are at 35,000 km, or roughly 4 times the height of Everest at the moment.” He paused. “You are correct that it is odd that the readings here are what they are. At this height the oxygen levels should be roughly 6.2%, or roughly a third of what they are at sea level. Then there is the temperature… it should be -54 degrees.”

“And… what does that mean?” Yamcha said, scratching his head.

It was a rather nervous looking Bulma that answered. “That at this height I should be gasping for air as I slowly die from a lack of Oxygen… assuming I don’t freeze to death.”

“WHA!?!?!” Yamcha exclaimed while Chichi nervously held Gohan closer.

“Oh, come on Chichi, its okay!” Goku assured her. “I came up here when I was a kid and nothing happened to me! You’ll be fine!”

Piccolo scoffed. “Considering some of the things you’ve claimed have happened to you I’m not sure that is as comforting as you think it is.”

“I wondered why you cast those spells on yourself,” Tien said, gesturing to the shimmering aura that was clinging to my skin. “And is there any way to turn that down.”

“The air is fine, Kayos!” Goku said, doing several jumping jacks to prove his point.

“Uh huh,” I said, eyes narrowed. “Though lets not forget I am still the weakest person in this group. You guys can bench press houses and I include Bulma in that mix because I am still not 100% sure she isn’t a cyborg.”

“Please, like cyborgs are real,” Bulma said with a dismissive way of his hand.

~MC~MC~MC~

Dr. Gero suddenly looked up, glowering, before he got back to work on reinforcing his 15th android’s skeleton.

~MC~MC~MC~

“So the rest of you might be able to survive up here but I am going to keep every protection spell I can running… besides, it might actually help burn off some of my excess magic.” I paused before holding out my hands. “Though… I can try this to help. I mean, if Piccolo can do it… “

“What was that-“ Piccolo began only for me to twist my hands in one direction and then the next before I slam my palms together.

“White Satin!” I declared and from my hand shot out beams of light… that formed into rhinestone sunglasses for everyone. “Heh, it worked! There was a 25% chance that was going to make your eyeballs explode.”

“WHAT?!?!” Bulma screamed.

“Huh, neat,” Krillin said, tilting his head as he looked at everyone. “Fancy too.”

“Yeah,” I said. “Not sure why they went Elton John but hey, it worked.” I frowned as I looked at my hands. “Of course I wish I could just snap my fingers, Q style. That would be cooler but I guess the hand gestures are important.”

“Or,” Kami said, making his presence known, “you could take my word that the protections I have built around this place, like the guardians before me and the ones that will come after, ensure that all who step foot here are safe.”

“…okay,” I said, willing the protection spells to fade away. Much to my relief I didn’t go flying off or suddenly find myself turned into a popsicle. As for why I decided to get rid of them… it was Kami. Even having seen him in the anime there was something… awe-inspiring about the Guardian of Earth. He radiated a sense of serene strength that people just want to trust him. To feel safe in his presence. Chichi set Gohan down on the ground, the tension leaving her. Bulma’s shoulders slumped. Tien’s face softened.

The only one of us not affected was Piccolo. In fact he seemed to grow more tense being near his other half. I had offered other ways for him to be involved without having to be here, such as using Isco as a kind of go-between and having Piccolo just listen through my mind (assuming he could reach out like Kami could), but Piccolo had refused.

“I have to still hear him,” Piccolo had grumbled, “and even then he can always just pop into my head if he wants to annoy me.”

“Now then, what is it that brings you all here?” Kami asked, drawing me out of my thoughts. “While I am pleased to see you again, Goku, as well as your friends I imagine that this isn’t a social call and you must-“

“Stop pretending that you don’t know why we’re here,” Piccolo grunted. “We all know that you see everything that is happening down on earth.”

“While it is true I can see everything that doesn’t mean I comprehend it,” Kami stated calmly. “If I showed you a thousand flowers you would see each and every one of them… but would you be able to describe each in detail for me? Tell me the color of every petal? The tilt and bends in every stem?”

“We aren’t here about flowers,” Piccolo said, folding his arms over his chest. “We are here about the Earth… the one YOU are supposed to be Guarding. Yet you seem to be doing a wonderful job at it, considering that not only did it get invaded by those Saiyans but now someone else has stolen the Dragon Balls.”

“And for someone claiming to wish to conqueror the Earth-“ Kami began.

“Hold up!” I snapped, raising my hands up. “You two can whip’em out and see who has the bigger green dick later. We came here for info and to find out if we need to be prepared for a fight or if we just need to go on a Dragon Ball hunt. So how about you two actual like good little Namekian boys and stop snipping at each other?” I glared at that the two before remembering just who I was talking to. “Respectfully.”

Piccolo merely stared me down for a moment before letting out a huff and turning away while Kami dipped his head, smiling softly. “You are of course correct, Avo Kayos. Come, let us discuss what has happened with the Dragon Balls.”

As our group began to make our way towards the main structure of the Lookout, the little home area where Kami stayed, I found myself walking with Mr. Popo. The black-skinned genie glanced at me and smiled slightly.

“That was good of you, to get them both to see reason,” he said in a low whisper. “They are very much alike, when it comes to the most basics of their personalities. It is merely a matter of them having different views and focuses. But they both have a stubbornness and a need to be the ‘victor’ in any verbal duel and if they can not be they shut down the entire conversation. We would have been here for hours had you not gotten the two to actually stop and remember what was going on.”

He paused.

“Interested in a job?” he said and it took me a moment to realize he was teasing.

“Sorry, I couldn’t pull off the vest as well as you do,” I joked.

That caused Mr. Popo to tug on said garment, looking a bit smug.

Finally arriving in the…house?... we found a large table already set up, cups of tea and some finger foods laid out. Glancing at Mr. Popo I knew at once that was his doing, most likely because he knew that Goku would be with us and would be better able to focus if had a snack available rather than sitting there thinking about how hungry we were. Piccolo refused to take a seat, of course, hovering behind us, and much to my amusement Kami did the same thing, though he faced us all.

“You are right that the disappearance of the Dragon Balls is a concern,” Kami said. “And I did not think much of it when it first occurred. The Dragon Moon has began to wane… in fact it is very likely that it will end before the Dragon Balls recharge.”

“Wait,” Yamcha said, suddenly rather nervous, “that means that the punishment for using the Dragon Balls so much will activate! We’ll be going years without them!”

“4 years, to be precise,” Kami stated. “The wish to free Dr. Wheelo. The one to return you, Yamcha, to life. Avo Kayos’ wish to grant the Son family the return of their tails and control of the Great Ape Form-“ Chichi opened her mouth to ask about that but Kami continued on, “-and now this wish.” He closed his eyes. “Allow me to see if I can determine just what wish was made…”

And with that he felt silent.

“What were you going to ask him, Chichi?” Goku asked as he grabbed some little mini cakes and shoved a few into his mouth.

“I want to know more about that third wish,” she said, annoying Goku couldn’t figure it out. “I want to know WHY I suddenly have a Saiyan tail. I’m not a Saiyan!”

“Yes and no,” Mr. Popo said, pouring tea for her. “It all depends on your point of view.”

“What does that even mean?” Chichi asked.

“You are not fully human,” Mr. Popo stated.

“I know. The wish-“

“I mean that you were never fully human,” Mr. Popo stated. “If I had met you before the wish I could have informed you of this. If it had been important.” He paused. “It is rather rude to just blurt such things out.

Chichi stared at the genie in shock. “I… but how? My father is the Ox King and while he might be larger than most Earthlings he is still a Earthling!”

“That is true,” Mr. Popo stated. “But what of your mother?”

“My… my mother?” Chichi whispered.

I frowned and held out my hand, the Scroll of Knowledge slapping into it. “Scroll, who was Chichi’s mother?” I frowned as I tilted my head, reading of the answer which, for once, wasn’t the poetic waxing the scroll seemed to enjoy. “Ohlrara.” Chichi gave a shallow nod at that and I continued, realizing I need to be a bit more specific. “Scroll, was Chichi’s mother a Saiyan? And how did she get to earth?”

This time there was a bit of flair.

Enraged by their status

And the respect they weren’t shown

The Angry Brides left Planet Vegeta

And Sought out new Homes

Ohlrara was the last

Arriving on Earth

Where the Ox King Found her

And a second crown she did receive

“Well, at least it doesn’t rhyme,” I muttered before looking at a strict Chichi. “So… that answers that. Your mother left Planet Vegeta, the home of the Saiyans. Not sure WHY, other than she was angry about something involving respect which considering we have Vegeta and Nappa as gauges…”

“Did you say the Angry Brides?” Raditz said, getting up from his seat and moving towards us. “I know of that story.” And I felt super embarrassed at that; I needed to remember that Raditz was a fountain of knowledge we needed to tap.

“What happened?” Goku asked, looking at his brother. “Who are the Angry Brides?”

“They were a group of Saiyan Women, the daughters of the Elite of Planet Vegeta who were married into powerful families. They had become friends and through their time together came to believe that Saiyan society was unfairly slanted towards men.”

“And I’m sure that was entirely wrong and it was a place of peace and harmony,” I groused.

Raditz glowered at me but continued on. “When they couldn’t get King Vegeta or the other members of the Elite to take on even a single change they requested the Angry Brides fled Planet Vegeta one night, scattering amongst the stars. It was a massive scandal… many Saiyan Elite Males claimed their wives had died rather than reveal they had left; a great sickness occurred the year they left and many weaker Saiyans died, both among the Elite and the Low Class. No one is even for sure how many Angry Brides there were, as all of their husbands claimed that they died suddenly.” He gave a shrug. “Sorry, that’s all I know… I wasn’t exactly interested in obscure history these last few decades.”

“More than what we had,” I said.

Chichi was quiet. “My mother… was a Saiyan Elite?”

“Huh,” Goku said, scratching his chin. “And Saiyan Elites are powerful, Raditz?”

“Very powerful,” his brother confirmed. “Our father was right on the cusp of being declared an Elite. Had Planet Vegeta not been destroyed I would have earned the title myself.” He paused and a hint of his earlier arrogance returned. “Not sure about you…”

“Oh, I would have earned it,” Goku said, passion flashing in his eyes.

But Chichi wasn’t in a joking mood. “But… what does that mean…”

“It means nothing,” I said firmly.

“It means everything!” Chichi protested. “My entire life is a lie!”

“Aw, come on Chichi!” Goku said with a grin, wrapping an arm around her. “Did it change things for you when we learned I was Saiyan?”

“Well… no,” she admitted. “But-“

“But nothing,” I said firmly, cutting off that line of thought. “This doesn’t change who you are. It is merely another layer to the woman you are. You are still Chichi, wife of Goku, mother of Gohan, friend of Avo Kayos. And if you want to go beyond that… you are Chichi. Kick ass fighter, quite literally. You battled Goku at the World’s Martial Arts Tournament, you can break rocks with yoru pinkies, you are insanely smart, and an amazing cook.” Chichi looked at me, eyes brimming with tears. “This doesn’t define you Chichi. Not unless you want it to. Raditz bleeds Saiyan. Goku… well, I think he’s still deciding. Gohan doesn’t care because being a Saiyan or a human doesn’t change much. Same with you.”

“…right,” Chichi finally said. “You’re right.”

Raditz though was frowning. “It does change one thing though: Vegeta.”

“What do you mean?” Goku asked. “You think he’s going to be upset that Chichi is a Saiyan? Or half Saiyan?”

“Upset isn’t the word I’d use for it,” Raditz stated.

“…ah,” I said, cluing in at once.

“Wait, what are you getting at?” Chichi asked, confused.

“I’m guessing that Vegeta is the kind of person who would rather be with a Saiyan, even a half Saiyan, over any other race?” I asked.

Raditz nodded, looking at Chichi. “One of the things he’s had us doing for the last few years is investigate any rumor about Saiyan Women that had survived the destruction of our home planet. Hunting down any talk of women with tails or who showed great fighting ability. Even if it wasn’t one of the original Angry Brides a daughter would have been fine with him. But we found nothing and he came to believe that it was a myth. But now, knowing you exist? He will seek you out.” He frowned, brow dropping. “And the fact that you are married to Kakarot will not please him either. You are a daughter of an Angry Bride, one of the Saiyan Elite. He will see Kakarot as unworthy-“

“If he even THINKS of trying to hurt my family I will remove his ability to reproduce,” Chichi declared, eyes flashing with rage.

‘Honestly, it surprising we never figured out sooner that she had Saiyan blood,’ I thought to myself as Goku worked to calm her down. ‘She has shown the insane bursts of rage and strength that Saiyans have. And yeah, she did appear to be getting older but that was more of her letting the stresses of the world get to her… and we don’t know how it will work with Gohan. Do you need to be a pure-blooded Saiyan to have your aging halt?’

“Oh my,” Kami said, suddenly opening his eyes.

“What is it, Old Man?” Piccolo demanded, stepping forward. “What did you see?”

“A grave threat, Piccolo. One greater than perhaps even the Saiyans.”

“WHAT!?!?” Krillin, Yamcha, and Chiaotzu cried out in shock.

“What does that even mean?” Goku asked. “Greater than Vegeta and Nappa?”

“That’s right, Goku,” Kami said. “The threat comes once more from the stars… and is both familiar and vastly different.”

“What is it, Kami?” Tien inquired.

“A Super Namekian… Lord Slug.”

My eyes widened.

‘I should have guessed… the movies are somehow canon in this world. Wheelo proved that. And Goku hadn’t achieved his Super Saiyan form when he fought Slug so it was coming… and if he has the Dragon Balls-‘

“Well, that is just a lazy name,” Isco commented. “A Super Namekian… I suppose I am an Ultra Robot and Kayos is a Super Special Awesome Mage.” I blinked and looked at Isco, wondering if that was on purpose or an accidently reference.

“Lazy name or not,” Tien said, “it still sounds like this Lord Slug is a threat to the Earth.”

“He very much is so,” Kami stated. “From what I have been able to gather from viewing his men they used the Dragon Balls to wish for his youth once again. And now, having regained his former strength… Lord Slug will seek to transform Earth into the new vessel for his grand conquest of the universe.”

“…well,” I said, the other silent, “fuck.”

~MC~MC~MC~

Angila pulled off his helmet and smiled, running his fingers through his hair. “I do wish there was a way for us to protect ourselves without having to resort to those things.” He looked up and while he couldn’t see it he know that high above in the planet’s atmosphere the terrafreezing device continued to belch out the heavy black clouds.

“We should have wished on those Dragon Balls to remove our weakness to sunlight,” Medamatcha complained as he removed his chest armor. “Then we could have taken this planet out the old fashion way, rather than just waiting to freeze them all!”

“Watch your tongue!” Angila snapped. “We have a way to get around our weakness! Wasting a wish on that might have cost us Lord Slug… is that what you desire?”

Medamatcha began to rapidly wave his hands about. “Of c-course not!” He stammered. “I… I merely meant-“

“I know what you meant,” Angila said darkly. “Be glad it was only I who heard that and not Lord Slug… he wouldn’t be as forgiving.”

Off to the side Wings muttered something under his breath but one glance from Angila had him go silent and he and Medamatcha set to work preparing the area around their ship for any counter attacks by the planet’s armies or forces. There were always those that couldn’t accept that their time was at an end and tried to fight. Angila, while also looking over the lay of the land around them to determine what would be the smartest thing to do in terms of placement of their own defenses, found his mind turning to his partners.

‘How could they ever think of disrespecting Lord Slug like that?’ He thought darkly. ‘After all he gave us…’

Planet Slug had been one of the most horrid places in all the galaxy. There were scattered records on the planet that stated that it had once been a peaceful place, with a violet sky and calm waters all under the soft light of three suns. But if that was true or just a myth no one could say and certainly for all of modern history and even before that it had been a hellish place. Two great black holes, just far enough away that they didn’t consume the planet outright, greedily slurped away the light of the only sun the planet had, leaving it in dim darkness. The gravitational pull of the black holes, the Demon’s Eyes as they were called, upon the planet caused earthquakes that made even the most stable structure collapse, so very little could be built. The moon had been cleaved apart and the shattered halves pulled on the oceans, causing them to become chaotic hellscapes that none dared get near.

No one would ever choose to live there.

No one did.

Countless alien species though had found their ships caught in the gravity well of the Demon’s Eyes and found themselves pulled to Planet Slug. The lucky ones would die in the crash. The survivors found themselves trapped on the planet with no way to escape. Eventually they would either adapt… or die.

Life on Planet Slug was difficult, to say the least. There had been no government, no true society. Roving bands of nomadic warriors would be constantly on the move, trying to get just a little bit more for themselves and knowing that at any moment their alliances would shatter and they would fall into brutal infighting. This constant join and unjoining had resulted in nearly the entire population of Planet Slug, those that had been born on the planet, to be nothing more than Half Breeds. Odd mixtures of alien species, resulting in new powers and abilities… and problems.

‘Wings suffers from stomach cramps once a month… no one knows why,’ Angila thought to himself as he walked the perimeter of their landing site. ‘Medamatcha’s teeth keep falling out. No one knows why.’ He looked down at his boots; Angila knew he was rather attractive by, well, every species’ standards. Tall. Strong. Gorgeous hair. Stunning cheekbones. But… he suffered just like the others. Perhaps even more son than any other!

He got calluses on his feet.

No one knew why.

The constant blending of genetics meant that within a few generations anyone born on Planet Slug simply had no other home other than that wretched place. They didn’t belong anywhere. Had no people.

‘Nevermind we can’t survive most places in the universe,’ Angila thought to himself, looking up once more at the sky and the thick dark clouds that were rolling along the it. ‘Our eyes can’t handle strong light and the warm temperatures leave us cooking. If not for our armor we wouldn’t be able to survive a planet such as this for more than a few minutes!’ Thus the bulky, heavy armor that they wore that helped regulate their body temperatures so they could survive the warmth of the planets they landed on, as well as the helmets that allowed them to see without being blinded. ‘Planet Slug… it left its mark on all of us. Ruined us. Until Lord Slug came. Until he united us-‘

He suddenly whipped around when warning signals screeched out from the perimeter sensors.

“Medamatcha! Wings!” he shouted. “It looks like the people of this planet have finally decided to face us!”

Medamatcha hurried over, eyes sparkling in delight. Which wasn’t a good thing for ANYONE. “Oh, about time!” he declared, rubbing his hands together. “I was getting bored… about time I got a fight.”

“Hold on!” Wings declared, grabbing onto the smaller warrior’s shoulder before he could rush out and confront whoever was coming. “You know the orders. We let the grunts take’em on first.”

“Aw, where is the fun in that?” Medamatcha complained. “Let me just tear them apart a little bit… I’ll leave enough for us to be able to identify the women and children.” He pressed his hand to his mouth and giggled.

But Angila shook his head. “Wings is right. Lord Slug likes to see the strength of any opposing forces. We will remain on the sidelines until we see just how strong the planet’s defenders are.” He paused. “And then, should our forces fail… you will be given free range.”

“Then I hope they fail quickly!” Medamatcha declared as the alarms continued to blare… and the strangest group of beings landed just on the outskirts of the landing site.

“Why does that one have three eyes?” Wings asked, staring at a tall bald headed figure who had his arms folded over his chest. Next to him was an absolutely tiny figure, pale white with red cheeks.

“And that one has a tail!” Medamatcha declared, pointing to the figure in question.

“And that one with the weird things growing over his eyes!” Wings added, pointing to a male that was standing next to a robotic being.

“…those are glasses,” Angila stated dryly.

“Oh.”

Angila huffed… only to grow quiet when he noticed the tallest member of the group.

‘It can’t be,’ he thought, staring at the green skinned figure. ‘He… he just looks similar! That’s all!’ He wished the warrior would remove his turban, let him see his ears. Nice rounded ears… that would have settled all his questions for him. Dismissed his concerns. Proved that the figure was just another alien race and not one of the legendary Na-

One of the Slug Force members let out a cry and opened fire on the ground and the battle was at once joined.

~MC~MC~MC~

“Thank you for letting us stay up here, Kami,” Chichi said, watching as Gohan practiced with his power pole. Mr. Popo had volunteered to train with him and while at first Chichi had been worried that her little boy would injure the genie Mr. Popo had proven to be surprisingly flexible and agile. Gohan would swing the pole in a hundred different ways and still Mr. Popo found ways to avoid the blows. Many times he didn’t even move his feet, simply leaning away like Gohan was moving in slow motion. Rather than get upset her son just became more determined, grinning as he and Mr. Popo chatted about his flowers even as they sparred.

“It is no trouble at all,” Kami said with a soft smile. “Honestly I wonder why I haven’t opened up the Lookout to more of Goku’s friends and family sooner. It is a good place to be if there is a battle that might endanger others. I am the Guardian of Earth, after all.”

“Well, I wish you could guardian me up some circuit boards,” Bulma said as she finished her lap around Kami’s palace. “I mean, this is nice and all, but I’d rather be working on something to help the guys down there.”

“We have to think about Gohan,” Chichi reminded her. Honestly, and it was shocking for her to realize it, she also wished that she could be down there. “I want nothing more than to be side by side with Goku, making sure he is okay.” Her tail twitched in agitation until she carefully grabbed it and wrapped it around her waist. “After fighting Vegeta and Nappa I would feel so much better being with them all. But I have to remember that Gohan needs to be protected and your mech suit was damaged.”

“More like reduced to scrap,” Bulma said with a shake of her head.

“You must have faith in them,” Kami intoned. “They are stronger now then they were yesterday, and tomorrow will be stronger still. They push each other to go beyond their limits.”

“It also helps that they have things that the invaders won’t expect,” Mr. Popo said as he walked backwards past them, still dodging Gohan’s blows. “Tien and Chiaotzu’s power swapping, the training King Kai gave Yamcha, Kayos’ magic…”

“What worries me,” Chichi said softly, “is we don’t have any more senzu beans left. We used them up healing ourselves. We thought we might have a break after the Saiyans but…”

Kami sighed, cracking an eye open. “You didn’t know. How could you? None of us expected these invaders to arrive.”

They all fell silent, hoping that their friends would be okay.

~MC~MC ~MC~

“So…” Roshi said with a sniff as he looked up at King Yemma, “ya miss me?” He smirked at that, staring right up at the Judge of the Dead.

“You know,” King Yemma said with narrowed eyes, “its not wise to taunt someone that can boot you down to Hell!”

Roshi’s beard blew backwards a bit at that but he just combed it back down. “Me? I’m as pure as fallen snow!”

King Yemma merely stared at him.

“Honest.”

“I know about the peeping,” Yemma replied. “If it had been my daughter you peeped at I would have thrown you threw the soul scrubber myself!”

Roshi looked about. “Uh… just as a hypothetical… where might your daughter be right now?”

“SILENCE!” Yemma roared, this time causing Roshi to tremble as he finally realized he’d pushed things just a touch too far. “I am seriously tempted to toss you into the deepest pits of Hell! The worst one ever!” He leaned in. “You know the one.”

“Not that!” Roshi exclaimed.

“Oh yes! Where all the women are old, fat, and saggy! And they grow hair where they shouldn’t and not where they should!”

“NOOOOOO!!!!” Roshi wailed, falling to his knees, pressing his head against the floor. “I beg of you, King Yemma, show mercy to an old man!”

“Hmmm… very well,” King Yemma finally said. “It isn’t my choice to make either.” That had Roshi looking up in surprise. He didn’t understand what the King of the Ogres could mean; he was the Judge of the Dead! How could it NOT be his choice?!!? “King Kai has requested you be allowed to run Snake Way and, if you succeed, you join him on his planet. He apparently wishes to see the man that trained Yamcha-“

“Sold!” Roshi declared, running out of the room.

“HEY!” King Yemma bellowed as Roshi ran off. “I WASN’T FINISHED!”

“Uh… if you need more time I’m willing to wait,” Nappa said, still a few souls behind the front of the line.

“SILENCE!”

The bald Saiyan’s spirit ducked his head and meekly went back to just standing in line.

~MC~MC~MC~

Piccolo grabbed onto one of the alien invaders and threw them hard into a strange looking light near the base of their ship. He didn’t even smirk when it shattered into a million pieces… both the light and the body. No, he was more focused on the others, making sure none of his…

‘What are they to me, anyway?’ he thought to himself as another one of the invaders tried to fire on him. But Piccolo merely sidestepped the shots, barely registering the screams of pain from another one of the invaders as they were caught in the crossfire. ‘Allies, I suppose… except my truce with Goku should be over. The Saiyan threat is gone… well, Vegeta is still out there.’ The moment he thought that though he scowled; it sounded pathetic and weak to even himself. An excuse. ‘As much as I am loathed to admit it… I actually have enjoyed my time with them all.’

He had thought, when they had come up with the plan to train together for a year, that he would hate every moment of it. Needing to be around the humans and deal with their messy emotions and petty desires would lead him to ripping their heads off (verbally) and then needing to apologize for it. That or them cowering and trembling as they moved about him… which admittedly might have been entertaining at first but as time would have gone one would have become frustrating to deal with as it meant everything taking ten times as long to complete.

‘But that wasn’t the case,’ he thought even as he moved in on the invader who had been shooting him, shattering his gun in his bare hands and then delivering a punch that broke the visor of his helmet and drove glass into his eyes and face. ‘All of them found ways to fit me into their group without me ever feeling like I was forced to participate or was only being allowed around because of the threat.’ That had been the most surprising thing, how welcoming they’d been. He had been led to believe ever since his creation that he would be hated and feared forever because of who his father was. Yet Goku and his friends had accepted him rather quickly… ‘Hell, they were more suspicious of Kayos than they were me! Heh… admittedly that’s because he made the comment about poisoning Goku but I actually tried to kill him!’

Of course Isco had pointed out that almost everyone in the group had tried to kill Goku more than once. Perhaps that was why Krillin had mistrusted Kayos so much: he hadn’t made the attempt.

Yet.

‘So… what does that make me to them?’ Piccolo thought even as he thrust out his hand and fired a ki blast that sent the invader flying through the air right towards Tien who delivered a hand leg drop right as the being was passing him by. All momentum shifted as the triclops drove the alien invader into the ground, leaving him still. ‘Friend? Partner?’ He paused. ‘Does it matter?’

The three unmasked figures, who were clearly high-ranking members of the invading forces, finally decided to get into the battle, leaping at Piccolo and the Z Fighters. The widest of the three managed to hover slightly off the ground thanks to his wings, easily zipping past bodies to move at Yamcha who met him with a series of Wolf Fang Fists and Wolf Fang Kicks. The smallest of the three spawned strange miniature duplicates of himself that he sent at Krillin and Chiaotzu, the two dodging the first assault and going after the duplicates even as their creator cackled and moved towards Tien. Isco continued to focus on the remaining invaders, leave Goku, Kayos, and Piccolo staring down the final member of the trio.

“You know… you might be the fiercest foes we’ve ever encountered,” the tall alien said.

“Thanks,” Kayos said, stepping forward. “That is appreciated Mister…”

“You may address me as Angila.” Their foe smirked. “Of course how LONG you are able to even form words matters entirely on what you do next.”

Goku narrowed his eyes, clearly not liking that threat at all. “Why did you come to Earth? And what is with the dark clouds you are making?”

“Those?” Angila asked, looking up. “Hmmm… I suppose that would be a bother for you. Already I can see the little puffs of air coming from your lips. You must feel it, certainly… not just the cold but the darkness itself? For me it is a comfort but for you I imagine it’s a terror.”

“You think the darkness is your ally,” Kayos suddenly said, doing… something odd with his voice. Giving it a weird accent. “But you merely adopted the dark; I was born in it, molded by it. I didn't see the light until I was already a man, by then it was nothing to me but BLINDING!” He paused and flashed a smile. “What? No Space Dark Knight Rises placing in the Space Theaters?” He shrugged. “I couldn’t help myself, a thousand pardons for interrupting.”

‘What is he doing?’ Piccolo thought to himself. ‘That isn’t like Kayos… he’s a talker, sure, but he doesn’t gibber on without a reason…’

Anglia quickly recovered from whatever Kayos had been talking about, looking right at Goku with his arrogant little smirk reforming. “This is the terrafreezing process. Our ship will generate a great cloud that will cover this planet completely, blotting out the sun and dropping the temperature to a chill only known in the depths of space. When complete nothing but our forces will be able to survive on this planet… which will allow us to move to phase 2.”

“And what exactly is Phase 2?” Goku asked.

“Why, the transformation of this world into our new Planet Cruiser.”

“Planet Cruiser?!” Goku exclaimed in shock. “What is THAT?!?”

“The Planet Cruiser is a planet that has been hollowed out and modified to serve as a space ship for all of us of the Slug Demon Clan! Just as we transformed our wretched home world Planet Slug into a Planet Cruiser in order to escape the grasp of the Demon’s Eyes so too will we turn your planet into our new vessel. That will allow us to continue on our journey to conquer more worlds, cleansing them before selling them to the highest bidder!”

“And you expect us just to let you do that?” Goku demanded. “This planet is our home! We’ve already taken out one set of alien invaders, we’ll take you out as well!”

“My my my… that sounds rather impressive,” Angila stated flipping his hair over his shoulder and closing his eyes. “No. Wait. I’m wrong. For you see… you living your cushy little lives and defeating other soft weaklings isn’t that impressive at all.” He snapped his eyes back open, his features taking on a far more fierce look. “We were born into pain and suffering! Had to fight for every scrap! That is why I know we are going to destroy you if you dare to stand in our way.”

“Okay,” Kayos said, once more causing Angila to falter.

“…what?”

“I said okay.” He shrugged at that, walking around Angila without a care in the world. “So, I’m assuming you guys have a way to induct new members into your army?”

“New…”

“New members, yeah,” Kayos said. “Sorry, am I talking to fast? I’m talking to fast. New members into your army… how does that work? Is there an interview process? Do I need to schedule an appointment to betray my planet and side with you in the name of survival? Or is it more of a walk-in thing?”

“I… I don’t…” Angila scratched his head, utterly befuddled by the turn of events.

Kayos let out a laugh. “I mean… there is no way that you guys have been just flying around, killing whole planets without replenishing your ranks! I mean, Piccolo over there has killed… 7 guys?”

“9,” Piccolo confirmed.

“Exactly!” Kayos said with a happy little grin, pointing right at Piccolo and making a clicking sound with his tongue. Piccolo merely stared at the man who continued to shoot him a plastered on grin before suddenly whipping around and walking over to Angila. “Now then, we need to talk about benefits. Sure sure, survival is well and good but what’s your dental plan like? You do vision? I can’t get Lasik…”

“Are we sure that Kayos is healthy enough to be fighting?” Piccolo found himself asking. “I think Nappa might have gotten a hit in on him when we weren’t looking and caused some damage to that brain of his.”

Goku though titled his head. “I don’t know… I bet he has some reason for doing all this.”

And that’s when a giant explosion burst above them, causing several of the remaining invaders that Isco had been fighting to slam down into the ground.

“What?!?” Angila cried out, twisting up and staring at the sky only to scream, flinging his hand over his eyes. Piccolo pulled his own gaze up to see a giant fireball illuminating the dark clouds that had been building… and the remains of some device falling down to the earth, crashing into the invaders’ ship, tearing great holes into it.

“Yeah,” Kayos said casually, “I was buying Raditz time to destroy the terrafreezing device.”

“You bastard!” Angila shouted, opening his now bloodshot eyes, energy pooling in his mouth.

“WHITE SATIN!” Kayos shouted and the alien screamed again, his blast going wide as a pair of sunglasses with blinking white lights appeared on his face. He clawed at his face, but the ones Kayos had created didn’t end with earpieces like the ones he’d made for Piccolo and the others but instead were strapped to their head. He turned and began to create more of the sunglasses, more of the invaders screaming in pain as their weak eyes were assaulted by the light. And even if they weren’t Kayos’ oversaturation of Good Magic had caused him, upon performing the spell, to begin glowing again, the light causing the invaders to flee from him in agony… and right into the waiting fists of Goku’s friends.

“Piccolo!” Goku shouted and the green warrior spun out of the way just as Goku fired off a ki blast that slammed Angila into the already damaged ship. Piccolo, not to be outdone, rushed over and grabbed a large chunk of the damaged ship, tearing it free from the vessel before driving it into the Angila’s gut… and pretty much cutting him in half.

“Well… that was surprisingly brutal,” Krillin commented.

“Yet you didn’t mind doing it to those creepy little guys!” Chiaotzu commented, gesturing towards what Piccolo assumed was the remains of their foe. “You were throwing those Destructo Discs around so much they ended up looking like swiss cheese!”

“Yeah well…” Krillin trailed off, clearly having no answer.

“Hmmpf,” Piccolo said with a scoff. “So much for your invasion. At least the Saiyans destroyed a few buildings.” ‘And managed to kill someone,’ he thought, wisely deciding not to finish that comment.

Angila let out a weak cough. “This… this isn’t the end. Lord Slug will have heard what you did and will be rushing out here any moment to destroy you all! You will suffer-“

Kayos held up his hand and flared it with light, Angila letting out a pained cry.

“No one really cared about his speech, did they?” he asked. The blond man looked at his hand. “Huh… I thought torturing dying people would net me more evil magic. That sucks.” He flashed his hand several more times, making Angila groan. “Still… I suppose he is right… Lord Slug won’t take this kindly.”

“Right!” Goku said and the Z Fighters all backed away from the ship, ready for the leader of the alien invaders to make an appearance.

“…uh…” Krillin said, tilting his head. “He’s coming, right?”

“He should…” Yamcha admitted.

‘Where is he?’ Piccolo thought.

~MC~MC~MC~

“Where indeed?” Kami murmured, gripping his staff. “Where is Lord Slug?”

“Oh… right here… cousin.”

Kami turned… and stared in horror at the massive Super Namekian that was hovering above the lookout, a fierce and sinister grin on his lips.

Chapter Text

“Mommy…” Gohan said quietly, staring up at the large green warrior that had suddenly appeared on the Lookout. He didn’t feel at all like Mr. Piccolo or Mr. Kami. No… the little boy could sense there was something… wrong… about him. Something twisted up in his belly. Or perhaps it was more like the wrong thing had been poured into him, like dumping some pop into a water battle. It just was wrong.

“Stay behind me, sweetie,” Chichi said, pushing Gohan behind her even as Bulma moving to join them, Mr. Popo slowly shuffling towards them as well. “Is that…”

Mr. Popo nodded. “That would be the one that brought those invaders to our planet. The one that wanted to blanket the entire world in darkness and freeze us out. The Super Namekian.”

“So...” Bulma said slowly as the new Namekian glared down at them, “if Piccolo is the peak of regular Namekians and he can easily fight Goku… then a Super Namekian is a big deal, isn’t he?”

“I am afraid so,” Mr. Popo murmured.

Gohan swallowed but forced himself to remain calm. ‘You are a big boy now. You aren’t a crybaby anymore. If that mean man tries to hurt your friends and mom… you fight him, Gohan. You fight him just like dad!’

“Well,” the Super Namekian said in a low rumble, slowly landing before Kami “look at what we have here”. The older Namekian stood his ground, leaning against his staff as he stared at the intruder, eyes narrowed and face set in a scowl. The Super Namekian’s hand suddenly lashed out and Gohan gasped, ready for him to strike Kami… but instead he merely grabbed the Guardian of Earth’s chin and forced him to look up at him, slowly turning his head to the left and then the right. “Is this what I looked like only a few hours ago?” he said with honest curiosity. “How did any of my men ever remain with me if I was this old and pathetic?”

“You should know that power is more than muscles,” Kami replied.

The Super Namekian laughed at that. “I suppose you are right! I suppose you are right.” He shoved Kami’s head back, causing the Guardian to nearly topple… but he quickly caught himself, gripping hard onto his staff. “Still… there is something to be said about the power of youth!” He gestured at his arms and then his face. “Look at me, cousin… look well. Only a few hours ago I was as feeble and weak as… well, not you, come to think of it. You look like a stiff breeze could knock you over while I could still crush skulls even in my withered state.” He shook his head. “How foolish of you to waste your time guarding the Dragon Balls rather than using them.”

“So… you are the one that made the wish. Asked for your youth to be returned to you?” Kami narrowed his eyes, his tone utterly judgmental. “I’ve seen that wish play out before… it didn’t work out for him and it won’t work out for you.”

“It has worked out plenty well so far!” the Super Namekian declared. “But enough of that… we are both Namekians. Cousins. Exiles from our homeworld forced onto pathetic hunks of rock. We should at least show a bit of respect towards one another, don’t you think? Tell me your name, Guardian.”

“I am Kami, the Guardian of Earth.”

“Hmm… that’s a rather grand yet also rather pathetic name. It suits you.” He laughed. “I… am Lord Slug. Master of the Planet Slug.”

“On Earth we have slugs. They are slow, slimy, soft things that die to a bit of salt. We’ll have to see if that is a fitting name for you.”

Slug through threw back his head and chortled at that. “So! There is some spunk in you! Good… I was worried you would be a boring sort!” He held out his hand. “Now… come.”

“No… no I don’t think I will be going anywhere with you. I am the Guardian of the Planet and I will protect it.”

Slug considered Kami for a long moment. “I do not give second chances, old man. Take my hand and accept you are now my prisoner or you will suffer.”

But Kami merely smiled, shutting his eyes. “I don’t think I will. I can sense that you wish to keep me alive, Slug… you wish to control the Dragon Balls and to do that you must protect me, keeping me from harm. You know that if I die the Dragon Balls die with me and whatever schemes you have planned require them.”

“Schemes? You make it all sound so… complex. I am a simple man with a simple desire.” He folded his arms behind his back, standing in a rigid pose. “When our people cast me onto Planet Slug, just as they cast you onto this planet, I fought with all I had to survive. Because I wanted to survive. Then I wished to escape the hell the Planet was trapped in thanks to the Demon’s Eyes so I did that too, turning Planet Slug into a Planet Cruiser. And now I wish to establish the new Slug Empire. There are plenty of species of aliens looking for new planets to settle on. Because they abused their own or they have outgrown it or simply because they know their rivals want more. The Cold Empire has made the selling of such planets the source of their wealth and power and I wish to prove to this Prince Frieza that I can do more than match him… I can surpass him. Taking planets is easy enough but time consuming… but with the dragon balls…”

“Your men are all dead, Slug,” Kami pointed out. “You are a leader of no one.”

“And there aren’t those on this planet that wouldn’t jump to join me if it means a chance to indulge in slaughter?” Slug mocked, throwing his arms out wide. “You are appealing to a better nature that I do not have, Kami. I did what your greater half could not.”

That little comment startled Kami. “What are you talking about?”

Slug began to circle around Kami, head held high. “Come now… I felt it when my men fought the other Namekian… you two were once a single being. You used the Separation Ritual to split yourself in two…” He tilted his head down, looking at Kami, lightly poking him with his large meaty finger. “Were you a group of Namekians who had joined? No… no, you weren’t. He was exiled here, same as me cousin, as a child. I can sense it. He performed the ritual, purging the goodness from him.”

“I performed the ritual, casting out my darkness,” Kami said. Gohan frowned at that… he remembered hearing the others mention that Piccolo and Kami were connected. Did… did that mean they were like brothers? Or something else? It was very confusing.

Slug roared with laughter. “Then you are even more weak than I thought!” He let out a snort. “You messed it up, old man. Utterly failed.”

“What are you talking about?”

“The ritual to separate yourself into two. You failed to perform it properly. That is why I can sense the connection between you and that other Namekian. Instead of severing the connection between yourself and your other half you allow it to remain!” He threw back his head once more, laughing even as Kami stood there, eyes wide with shook. “And this is the guardian of this pathetic planet? A withered old man who can’t even cut away his hated aspects properly!”

Gohan glowered at that. He didn’t like how the green man was talking about Mr. Piccolo. He was a good person! A nice person! No one could hate him unless they were bad! And Kami wasn’t a bad person at all! He was nice and kind and Gohan felt safe with him. Just like he felt safe with his mommy and daddy and all his uncles and his aunt.

His mommy’s hand came out and Gohan blinked, not having realized that he’d been moving towards the large Namekian, so angered was he by his comments.

‘You’re going to regret everything you just said when my dad gets here,’ Gohan thought darkly. ‘Him and Mr. Piccolo and everyone else are going to make you pay for that!’

~MC~MC~MC~

Kami could feel the conflicting emotions coming off the others behind him. Fear was the main one. Anger too, which he completely understood. Slug had invaded their planet, invaded the Lookout, and then decided that it was his right and privilege to mock and insult him, the Guardian of Earth. But there was also confusion. Indignation. Respect and love. They all roiled together into the wonderful conflicting mess of feelings that was the main reason why he loved the Earth so much. He knew that it had been his own darkness that had made him unfit to be the Guardian of Earth, which is why he had removed such things from his body… but at the same time it was those feelings that made Earth so wonderful. Humans were able to be petty and evil… but they had the ability to not let it taint them. To move beyond that. They were able to take the negative emotions and use them for good.

But… Kami couldn’t focused on that. Couldn’t focus on the others gathered on the Lookout. In fact, for the very first time since he’d become, well, himself, he couldn’t focus on anything BUT himself.

Because… what Slug had said…

‘Is it true?’ He thought, reaching down and placing a hand on his chest, feeling his heart beat. ‘Did I fail in the ritual? I have always felt the connection between myself and Piccolo. Feared what it would mean if he were to die. Been forced to ignore the pangs I have felt that I know are from his own thoughts and feelings… just as I imagine he has done the same for me.’ In his mind he saw the two of them back to back only to be pulled away from one another by some invisible force. But no matter how far they were yanked away there was still a cord that connected them. It was razor thin, as if two threads from their garments had become knotted up and pulling them away only caused their clothing to become threadbare, the distance making them lesser. ‘My melancholy over what has happened this last year and how Piccolo has been able to experience all I wish to feel and do… is it because of my failure? Are we truly two separate beings? Or one soul that is torturing itself by remaining divided?’

Slug took a step closer, eyes narrowed and a cruel smile on his lips. “I did the ritual too, Old Man. Took all that I hated about myself, loathed about myself, that made me weak and unable to achieve my dreams, and cut it out of me. My compassion. My empathy. My sense of honor. My doubt. I pulled them out and produced a sniveling frail creature that curled in on himself and begged me to just leave it be. “I’ll die anyway,” he whimpered and he was right. Planet Slug was a harsh place… bathed in darkness, suffering constant quakes, filled with marauders that were willing to use the weak to slate all of their desires. My other half wouldn’t last ten seconds.”

“So you killed him, didn’t you?” Kami asked, tone dark.

But Slug merely smirked. “No.”

“…no?”

“No,” Slug repeated. “I grabbed him and I dragged him to the first gang of vile raiders I could find and offered him as payment for a single glass of water. And as he screamed and pleaded as they tore him apart all I could think was… that was the best glass of water I’d ever had.”

Kami suddenly lashed out with his staff, slamming it against Slug’s head.

The Super Namekian didn’t even move, allowing it to snap over his skull.

“So… there is a bit of fight in you,” he replied before he grabbed Kami’s wrists before planting his foot on the Guardian’s chest. Kami let out a cry of agonized pain as Slug ripped both his arms off right at the root. “Good… at least you won’t be boring.”

“Kami!” Mr. Popo shouted, moving towards him, kneeling down and checking him over. “Are you alright?”

He knew that for anyone else that would have been a mildly insulting comment. But thanks to his makeup (which he now understood was thanks to his Namekian blood) such wounds, while painful, were actually just temporary. His arms would regrow… it would hurt but they would regrow.

‘And he knows that,’ Kami thought as Slug looked down at him, an almost lustful smile on his lips as he stared at his carnage.

“You were right,” Slug declared, “I can’t kill you… I want the Dragon Balls and that means keeping you alive.” He suddenly thrust out his hand and fired off a Ki blast. Not at Kami… but at the humans.

Cries filled the air and Kami whipped around to see Bulma lying on the ground while Chichi had fallen to one knee, bruised, battered, and bloodied thanks to the surprise attack. She clearly was hurt but she was struggling to remain standing, to protect her son. Never in all his time watching Goku had Kami seen why Chichi was the perfect wife for the warrior than in that moment. But the fact remained that Slug’s surprise attack had still caught her hard. Even if she had been at full strength she would have struggled but now she found herself bleeding and battered. Worse she couldn’t fully focus on the fight because she had to worry about Gohan… and from the way that Slug was leering at her Kami knew he realized that as well.

“But I don’t need them.” He kept his arm up and straight, more power charging in his palm.

“Stop!” Kami shouted. “I’ll go with you! Spare them!” Mr. Popo pulled on him, trying to get him to remain standing but Kami struggled to break free of his grasp. “I mean it, Slug. Spare the Earth and I will go with you.” He bowed his head.

“…you act like you have a choice in this.” And with that Slug fired again. Chichi raised her arms up in an X shape to try and protect herself but it did little to stop the blast and Kami flinched at the scream she let out as the strike hit her. It wasn’t even as powerful as the one he’d sent out before; Slug was toying with her purely for the entertainment value.

“STOP IT!” Kami roared as Chichi, eyes half glazed over, slumped down, barely managing to keep herself from toppling over fully.

“You still don’t get it, do you?” Slug taunted. “Life on Planet Slug taught me the only rule that holds true throughout the galaxy: the only rules are the ones made by the strong!” He charged another blast. “They can do all they WISH!”

This time… he didn’t get the result he wanted.

Little Gohan had yanked the Dragon Shield from his back and held it in front of his injured mother, absorbing the strike Slug had sent his way. The boy glowered at Slug who merely raised his brow at that… and was rewarded by Gohan firing the energy blast back at him, causing Slug to cry out as he was struck by his own attack. It sent him stumbling back and he reached up to wipe a trickle of blood from his mouth.

“You little-“

Gohan yanked out the power pole and extended it, bridging the distance between him and the invading monster. The Pole drove right into Slug’s stomach, making him gasp, and Gohan rushed forward even as the pole decreased in side, swinging it hard into Slug’s head. That caused the Super Namekian to stumble to his right, giving Gohan the chance to leap at him.

“COME HERE!” Slug roared, swinging a punch at Gohan only for the boy to block with the Dragon Shield. Slug had expected that his blow would manage to send the boy flying so he was utterly baffled when his strike just clanged against the Dragon Shield… before like a crack of thunder it directed the energy of his blow right back at him, shattering his arm. “You little bastard!” he roared.

“Gohan, run!” Kami shouted as Slug charged towards him. But the boy was his father’s son and instead Gohan leapt at Slug, swinging the Power Pole again in an attempt to smash it across the invader’s skull. But Slug, even at his most angry, saw the blow coming thanks to how poorly Gohan had telegraphed it and easily caught the power pole before lashing out, sending Gohan flying up in the air. The Super Namekian leapt up and grabbed the boy, his entire hand easily wrapping around his body, and then forced himself down, slamming Gohan so hard into the Lookout that the tiles cracked. Gohan screamed in pain but Slug merely laughed, pressing down harder on the boy.

“That was impressive,” Slug said. “I’m almost tempted to let you live, if only to see what else you can do! But… I think it would be more fun to just smear your brains all over this platform!”

“Slug don’t!” Kami warned.

“You have no say in this, Old Man! I already warned you of that. There is nothing you can do that will stop this.”

“There is one thing,” Kami said before launching himself from Mr. Popo’s grasp and racing towards the edge of the Lookout.

He could hear Slug’s rage as he realized what Kami meant to do. But he didn’t dare look back, instead throwing himself off the edge of the Lookout. ‘At best he will chase after me, buying Mr. Popo time to get the others out of there. At worst…’ He could feel the cold wind biting into his skin as he plunged down from the Lookout, Slug’s roars of fury filling his ears.

And then he stopped.

“Yeah,” Piccolo said, Kami slowly opening his eyes, “I’m gonna ask you NOT do that again.” He slowly rose back up to the top of the Lookout, setting Kami back down before he removed his weighted clothing. “So… you are the Super Namekian.”

Slug’s lip curled back, showing off his sharp teeth. “And you are the Old Man’s other half. The one he failed to properly cut away from him. I can’t even begin to imagine how much you must HATE having to save him. Knowing if he dies… you die.”

“Oh, it is annoying, that’s for sure,” Piccolo said, moving past Kami. “I’m just glad whatever happens to him doesn’t happen to me. I’m not in the mood to begin regrowing arms.”

Slug laughed at that. “I like you, Cousin… I like you a lot. Rare I meet someone that I instantly sense I can trust.”

“And you don’t trust me either, do you?”

“…there might be hope for you yet.” Slug took a step forward. “You and I? We can do a lot on this world, working together. A lot in the universe, come to think about it. I’m sure you have some things to show me… and I can help you break free of that old man.”

“Piccolo,” Kami said only for the other Namekian the shoot a single Ki blast from his finger at Kami’s feet, a warning that he wasn’t in the mood to talk.

“Piccolo,” Slug said, rolling the name on his tongue. “Yeah… that’s a good fit. So Piccolo… you tired of living in fear of this old man slipping and ending your life? You ready to finally live free of him, instead of feeling like only half a Namekian?” He leaned in as the two came within touching distance. “You ready to claim this world… this galaxy… as your own?”

“Oh… like you wouldn’t believe,” Piccolo said.

And then he punched Slug hard in the face, sending him flying into the grove of trees and flowers that Mr. Popo tended to.

“But someone close to me once asked why anyone would want to deal with that headache.”

And with that he leapt at Slug, flinging kicks and punches at him, Slug raising his arms to easily block the blows.

“On your feet, Kami,” Tien said, suddenly appearing beside him. He looked over to see that Krillin was bent over Bulma, checking her out, while Yamcha was next to Chichi, seeing if she was able to move. “Sorry it took as so long but once we realized Slug wasn’t there it took us some time to figure out where he might have gone.”

“How did you figure out he arrived here?” Kami said as Tien helped him up. He debated about regrowing his arms but decided that it would be better to conserve his energy. He saw Chiaotzu over by Mr. Popo, who was fretting as Piccolo and Slug battled. The Super Namekian was more than holding his own against Piccolo, almost toying with him as he blocked his blows with lazy arm blocks.

“Goku felt Chichi and Gohan’s distress.” He shook his head. “Don’t ask me how. Raditz is making sure the last of Slug’s goons don’t come up here to help out.” Tien scoffed. “I can’t believe we’re actually trusting that guy…”

“People can change, Tien,” Kami said, wincing as he saw Piccolo take a hard hit. “Believe me… I know.”

Piccolo let out a cry and came slamming down next to Kami, one eye already beginning to swell up as Slug began to remove some of his own gear, tossing aside his helmet and then ripping the sleeves of his shirt. The Z Fighters all tensed as he thundered towards them, one lumbering footfall coming after the other. But Slug moved much like Vegeta, without a single care for the mass of warriors that were standing before him; Kami got the sense, from the dismissive way he moved, that Slug was used to facing hordes of enemies.

“Hmmm… so you got yourself your own band of warriors, huh?” Slug stated. He rolled his shoulders, smirking as he looked over the Z Warriors, clearly weighing them up and determining their strengths and weaknesses. “Good… I do need to test out my younger body… remember just all it can do. Some blood on my knuckles will really help with that.” He snapped his eyes over to Gohan and considered him for a long moment. “And what are you hiding?”

“I… I don’t…”Gohan said nervously, taking a step back.

“Don’t deny it, brat. I can sense it… there is something there. Weak but… also powerful-“

There was a POOF! and Kayos, who must have transformed into a bug of some kind so he could get close to Gohan, suddenly appeared before the boy, a smirk on his face as he lifted him up.

“You’re going to die today, Slug,” Kayos informed him. “You wasted your wish because young or old, hale and hearty or frail and weak? Death comes to everyone. And its come for you today.” He glanced about. “Not here though… I have a better place in mind.”

“The only one that is going to be snuffed out is you!” Slug said, suddenly lunging forward only for Kayos to rocket out of reach, floating in the air just beyond the edge of the lookout, still holding onto Gohan.

“First you have to catch me, Slug. And you are going to have your hands full. See… you pressed the Family Button.”

Before Slug could even react there was a displacing of air and Goku was suddenly there, looking down at Chichi, tendering stroking her cheek before he glanced over at Kayos with Gohan, staring at his frightened son. Then, ever so slowly, he turned his head towards Slug, eyes narrowed and mouth pressed into a firm line.

“Ya shouldn’t have done that,” Kayos taunted before he dropped like a stone, disappearing from sight.

“You think I-“

Goku let out a savage roar and blasted himself at Slug, grabbing onto the Namekian and driving him face first into the Lookout, tearing up the tiles as he began to slam the invader again and again into the ground. Slug though reached up and shoved Goku away, rolling his shoulders before he launched himself at the Saiyan Warrior. He threw back a fist, charging his fist with Ki, only for Tien and Chiaotzu to begin pounding him with small Ki blasts that had him forced to shield himself.

‘That is the problem with it comes to fighting the Z Fighters,’ Kami thought to himself as he watched Goku shake his head before leaping back into the battle, trusting Krillin and now Piccolo to watch over those still on the Lookout that were injured. Mr. Popo had gone to Bulma and disappeared, most likely teleporting her somewhere deeper in the lookout where she could heal and awaken from her blow without fear of further injury. Piccolo remained at Kami’s side while Krillin had brought Chichi to a grove of trees that were still standing, it clear from the way the woman was holding herself that, while hurt, she refused to leave the battle if her husband was at risk. ‘Even though Slug is far more powerful than all of them their numbers allow them to swarm their foes. And their training has allowed them to learn new abilities and tactics that make it hard to plan and counter them. And most important of all they trust each other in a fight.’

“Enough games, monkey boy!” Slug roared as he caught Goku’s arm and brought down his other elbow upon it, causing a crack that had Goku screaming in pain. But rather than back away Goku just snarled and began to attack with his feet, kicking and thrashing as he fought madly against the one that had hurt his family. The strikes forced Slug to let go of Goku but they weren’t hurting him that much. “All rage, no focus!” Slug taunted as he blocked the blows. “There are plenty of places for people like you in a squad… but not leader. Your little allies were fools for allowing you to take command!”

“Oh… is that so?” Goku suddenly asked, his fury instantly gone. Slug blinked at that, startled by the sudden change in demeanor before he glowered at the orange-wearing warrior, realizing that Goku had been playing him, making it seem like he was in a battle rage state. He was still clearly hurting from the attack on his arm, pressing it to his side, but he wasn’t blindly flailing about, risking himself and his friends by not thinking. It was trickery that Kami wasn’t used to seeing in Goku.

“Hmmm… he managed to pull it off,” Piccolo said, a touch of pride coloring his words. Kami stared at his other half in surprise. “He wanted to rush up here the moment he felt what was happening but we convinced him to come up with a gameplan. This was part of it. We need Slug on the backfoot.” Even as he said those words Yamcha roared out “KAIO-KEN!” and launched himself at Slug, driving his foot into the Super Namekian’s back, causing him to stumble right into a waiting Goku who lashed out with his left fist, socking him right in the temple.

“And what Kayos said? About Slug dying today… he has a plan?”

“He does and you aren’t hearing it,” Piccolo stated. “We can’t risk Slug realizing what we’re going to do.” He looked down at Kami and glowered. “So that means doing EXACTLY what I say, Old Man.”

“Now see-“

“No, you see here,” Piccolo snapped. “It’s a damn good plan. It will have Slug down and allow us to take him out. But we all have a role to play and yours is to stay out of the way. You are the Guardian of Earth, right? Accept that we are saving it and your role is to let us do just that!”

Kami stared at Piccolo for several long moments.

“What?”

“When… when this is done… I think we need to talk, Piccolo. Concerning our situation… and knowledge that Slug provided me.”

“Whatever,” Piccolo said before launching himself into battle.

“Kami?” Mr. Popo said, appearing beside him. “Come Kami, let us get you to safety.”

“Yes Mr. Popo,” Kami said, understanding that Piccolo was right. His place was to step aside.

He frowned.

‘But… perhaps… not for long…’

~MC~MC~MC~

Slug snarled as he was forced to duck the buzzing, whirling little discs of torment that the small bald human had sent his way. The antenna he was missing was testament of how sharp they were and he had no urge to feel their bite against.

The problem was that no matter where he turned another one of the Earthlings was waiting for him, moving into the deliver a flurry of attacks before backing off.

And there was the matter of the blond bastard and his threats.

Slug had received plenty of proclamations about his demise growing up. Back when he’d just been a little nameless green child, forced to scrape by on anything he could get his hands on, he had heard on a nearly daily basis someone proclaim they were going to kill him. He’d made sure, even at a young age, to make every one of those loudmouths pay for such comments, gleefully delivering death to them in as vicious of a way possible.

‘I will NOT let that human’s threat stand!’ Slug snarled before he finally saw a weakness in his foes’ attack pattern. Dropping his shoulder he blasted his way past the other Namekian, Piccolo, getting in one final good hit before he leapt off the Lookout, stretching out his senses to find the little monkey-tailed boy. ‘That orange wearing bastard didn’t like seeing that female injured… must be his mate and the brat his spawn. Well… I wonder how he is going to feel when he arrives to find his child skinned alive and made into a new glove for me!’ Slug grinned as he forced himself to go faster. ‘Just need to… there!’

At once he sensed the child and the blond man and Slug smiled, pushing himself a bit harder as he could feel the warriors giving chase.

‘Hit him hard. Rip the blonde bastard’s head right off his shoulders.’ He didn’t know what the man could do… despite being able to fly and appearing out of thin air right before him the man gave off no sense of true power. And yet there was also something there… something different from the others. Had he not been on his own, thanks to his men most certainly being dead, he would have taken the time to look into the figure. Torture him until he revealed his secrets. Now though all Slug wanted to do was utterly destroy the bastard and then crush the brat between his hands. ‘Then I’ll go and wait to pick off these fools one by one. Let them mourn and grieve while I slowly take them out. I’ll have a few months before the Dragon Balls are ready again… if I can confuse them enough they’ll leave Kami unprotected and I can capture him easily enough. Then it will be time to hunt down the Dragon Balls and use them to turn this entire planet into my new Planet Cruiser.’

He could see it in his mind even as he flew into a dense cloud: his wish that would force everyone on the planet to obey his whims. Those warriors all instantly broken to his will. He would enjoy forcing the Orange wearing one to brutally kill his own family with a damn smile on his face… or perhaps have them tear him apart. Man and Woman attacking each other without a second thought because he demanded it.

Yes… that would be sweet-

Something stabbed right into his brain and Slug screamed, losing control of his flight and slamming down into the hard stone of the plateau the blond man had landed on. He moaned, trying to get up, only for the sound to rip through his senses again, causing him to bellow as he clutched at his head.

And then another high pitch squeal came from his left and Slug shook, struggling to get to his feet. But there came another and another and Slug found himself being assaulted without a single blow falling on his form, making his spin about before he fell to his knees.

“That’s the problem with those heightened senses,” the blond man said as Slug cracked an eye open, staring at the warriors.

It was all of them except Piccolo and they were in a ring around him, lips puckered as they did… something… that was leaving him trembling on the ground. It felt like his eyes were going to burst out of their sockets and he couldn’t form more than the most basic of thoughts because his mind was being assaulted. His ears were the worst and he wanted to just rip them off in hopes that would stop the pain!

“Its called ‘whistling’,” he informed Slug. “For Namekians it is utter torture thanks to your hearing. One person doing it brings you to your knees. But all of us?” He let out a whistle of his own and Slug curled in on himself. “Of course I’m using a few spells to amplify the sound… make it even worse for you. Didn’t you wonder why the cloud was slightly different?” Slug cursed at that; he had been too consumed with his wishes to notice! “Thanks for chasing me… I needed to be away from Piccolo and Kami to make this happen.” Slug cracked an eye open to see him stepping back, replaced by the orange-wearing warrior. “Goku?”

“You’re sure there is no goodness at all in him?” Goku asked.

“Not a lick. Per Kami he tore out all his goodness and kindness and allowed others to brutally torture and kill it.”

Goku nodded before holding out a hand, charging up a Ki blast even as the others continued to whistle, not allowing Slug even a moment to try and fight back. “Then I hope whatever is waiting for you is ready to try and cleanse your soul.”

“WAIT!” Slug screamed reaching up for the Goku.

But then the Ki blast fired and Slug screamed as he was torn apart.

~MC~MC~MC~

“Is he done?” Yamcha asked, pausing his whistling.

“Yeah… he’s done,” Goku confirmed, lips pressing together tightly as he looked at the spot where Lord Slug had been. All that was left was a dark spot on the stone. “We’ll have some work to clean up the mess he made but we did it. We-“

“WAIT!” Kayos cried out.

“-saved the world.”

“Damn it!” he shouted, looking at his hands as they began to glow.

“Again?” Raditz said as he landed, watching in surprise as the mage began to double over.

“Is this going to happen every time we save the world?” Krillin asked as the good magic began to lash out all around Kayos.

“Maybe we should give him some room,” Tien suggested, backing away slowly.

“Or at least-“ Chiaotzu began.

“SHUT UP!” Kayos roared. “I’m trying hard not to regenerate into David Tenent!”

And then he threw his head back and screamed as the good magic blasted out of his body.

~MC~MC~MC~

“I can’t believe I was taken out of the fight before it even began!” Bulma pouted. She was leaning against Kami’s home, watching as the others helped Mr. Popo repair the Lookout.

“He came at us suddenly,” Chichi said, Gohan asleep on her lap. “We weren’t ready for him.”

“Which is why you need to both train more,” Raditz stated as he walked by, carrying a large potted tree. Mr. Popo had decided to move some things around, figuring they now had an excuse to redecorate.

“We train enough!” Bulma complained. She pushed herself up a bit, not wanting to appear weak in front of Goku’s brother.

“Then what you consider as ‘enough’ isn’t actually enough,” he replied snidely. “You rely on that armor of yours… you need to have ways to fight if it is broken.” Bulma frowned at that. “Foes won’t wait until you are ready with some gadget to attack you. So you need to always be armed or be able to fight without a weapon.”

“This was a one time thing,” Bulma found herself saying even though she knew it was a lie. “Normally I stay behind and let the others fight or watch from the sidelines.”

“Then you’re a fool,” Raditz said. He never set the tree down, the bastard. He wanted to show off how strong he was. “Slug just proved why that isn’t an option.”

Bulma grimaced at that. ‘He’s right. He came here… the Lookout should be the safest place on Earth and he still came here. If he had gotten a hold of one of us he could have used one of us as a hostage to keep the guys back. Too many villains have done that… Wheelo did that to me just a few weeks ago! As much as I hate to say it Raditz is right. I need to train. Find some way to always be in the fight. Because this year has shown that our foes are getting stronger and stronger… and far more cruel.’

As she considered all that Raditz looked to Chichi. “And you were the true disgrace… though I suppose that wasn’t all your fault. You just don’t know any better.”

“Excuse me?” Chichi said, getting to her feet. “And what exactly are you implying?”

“I’m implying nothing,” he stated. “I’m telling you that you are a Saiyan and put up a horrible showing.”

“I was defending my son.”

Raditz scoffed. “Of course.”

Chichi glowered at him. “You would only care about the fights, wouldn’t you? That is what being a ‘Saiyan’ is, in your mind: constant battle, never taking a moment to actually worry about other things. Like your family. Your friends. Your world.”

Raditz narrowed his eyes. “You don’t know a thing about me.”

“You invaded our world.”

“Yeah, I did,” he admitted. “Because it isn’t my world. Or… it wasn’t. But I’ve sworn myself to Kakarot and until I am strong enough to overcome him and all the rest of you I will remain loyal to him. And when I defeat him I expect the same from all of you. Its up to you Earthlings to get me to change my mind and see your way is better and right now I’m not seeing it.”

“Because I chose to defend my son?”

Raditz scoffed. “Because you only thought about standing there taking the hits instead of attempting to launch an attack or escape to a place where you had the advantage.” He waved over at Kayos, who was talking with Mr. Popo. “That one there? You could rip off his arms and legs right now if it weren’t for his magic. He is the weakest of you all save perhaps for the machine woman there.” He pointed at Bulma who was still deep in thought. “Yet he went in, got Gohan, and got the hell out. He used his head and set a trap for Slug and that is why he’s currently burning in Hell right now. You took two hits and still left your son defenseless.

“You are a Saiyan now. According to Kakarot you were always a partial Saiyan and that wish Kayos made just brought it out in you. And a Saiyan, male or female, wouldn’t just stand there and die a meaningless death. They would fight so that what they were fighting for actually survived.” He huffed. “Whatever… at least you got a power boost.”

“What are you talking about?” Chichi said, her anger at his words (even if, in her heart, she knew there were threads of truth woven into his scolding) fading at that comment.

Raditz smirked. “When a Saiyan warrior comes close to death their body attempts to save them by drastically increasing their power. If I had a scouter on me I’d be able to tell-“

“Oh!” Bulma said, going for her bag and pulling out her scanning device. “We can check your Bulma Level!”

“Her… what?” Raditz said, for the first time since the conversation began finding himself confused.

“Her Bulma Level! Now I measured you just before we battled Raditz and…” She scanned Chichi only for her eyes to go wide as she stared at the numbers on the screen. “That… oh my god!”

“What is it?”

“Chichi… you are nearly as strong as Piccolo and Goku!”

Chichi stared at her hands in shook.

Raditz huffed. “Well then, now you really do need to train.” Chichi looked up at him sharply but Raditz shrugged. “Kakarot can tell you… as you get stronger you have to put more effort into the little things. Not snap data pads in half, careful with doors… I’d watch how you hugged the kid, just to be safe.”

Chichi’s eyes went wide with terror at that as Raditz ambled off.

~MC~MC~MC~

Piccolo frowned as he stood across from Kami, arms folded over his chest. They had stepped away from the others, using the repairs to the Lookout as an excuse to have their conversation. While it could have been done telepathically both had realized that it was something that needed to be done with no distractions, with their entire focus on the subject.

“So… I’m not really… me…” Piccolo finally said.

“Not quite, as far as I have gathered,” Kami said. “We have always known that we were two halves of the same Namekian, Piccolo. Born of him. But Slug confirmed what I had already begun to realize: you aren’t my evil half. You never were.”

“I’m just what that original Namekian thought were traits not fit to be the Guardian of Earth,” Piccolo said slowly.

“It explains so much, doesn’t it? A Guardian doesn’t battle… none of the Guardians have gone seeking out fights. I can fight… but I prefer not to. You, on the other hand, enjoy fighting. I have found myself growing weary of my task… and frankly I have felt that since I took it on.”

“While Piccolo Sr. was consumed with ruling,” Piccolo murmured. There were other things that he knew made them different that didn’t quite fit the idea that King Piccolo was purely evil. ‘But if I look at it as our past self trying to make himself into the perfect Guardian with everything else getting put into another form…’

Kami spoke up. “Do not think of yourself as lesser. You aren’t the… refused bits of a meal.” He shut his eyes. “Because you aren’t alone in feeling like you aren’t complete. I hadn’t realized that I felt so… deficient… until I began to truly think about my existence.”

“You might say that but its still coming off as insulting,” Piccolo grunted. “I am all that wasn’t good enough.”

“From the eyes of a flawed being,” Kami protested, opening his eyes once more. “Who we once were… he wasn’t a perfect being. He made a mistake… he made mistakes… and that resulted in him splitting in two. You and I, Piccolo, are two halves, the two possibilities for him… but we aren’t whole.”

Piccolo didn’t like thinking about that. Didn’t like considering that he might not be as real as he’d always held. There were enough problems with him being his ‘father’s son’ and everyone just seeing King Piccolo and not him. ‘Hell, I didn’t even understand what that meant for a long time,’ he thought before saying out loud, “And this other mistake you mentioned? The one Slug clued you in on? That is why you asked to talk in private.”

Kami dropped his head. “I… no.” He suddenly looked up. “I have been wrong to say that it was I who did this, Piccolo. It was us. We performed the ritual. We chose to separate ourselves into these two forms. To claim that it was me is to diminish you and I am sorry that I have done that. I wonder…” He looked off to the side. “I wonder… what life would have been like had I offered your father a hand of friendship rather than locked him away.”

“It wouldn’t have mattered,” Piccolo stated. “He was obsessed with becoming the Ruler of Earth. It blinded him to all else. He would have captured you if you had tried.”

Kami smiled at that, which made Piccolo feel rather uncomfortable. “I suppose you are right. Still… I will never again make you feel as if you are some splinter from a greater whole, Piccolo. We are the two halves of the same being and you deserve that.” He sighed. “As for the mistake… Slug informed me of the truth. We failed when we performed the ritual.”

“I doubt that, since we’re standing right here,” Piccolo said.

“No,” Kami said with a faint smile, walking over to Piccolo. “When we performed the ritual we did not separate fully. You and I should have split fully, with no connection between us. But there is a tether, one that keeps us linked.”

“So the fact that if one of us dies so does the other…”

“Should never have been,” Kami said. “It is why we both have found ourselves… rudderless. Achieving what we want and desire but still feeling empty. King Piccolo ruled over the Earth but was never truly content during that short time. I am the Guardian and have only longed for my freedom. And you do not know what place you want in the world.”

“Hmmm… maybe.” Piccolo turned his head away, refusing to speak of such weaknesses to Kami. “But I’m happy with who I am. So no need to worry about me.”

“I worry about us,” Kami said. “Which is why I ask you to forgive me.” He placed his hand on Piccolo’s chest.

“Whatever, Old Man.” Piccolo went to leave… but found himself frozen in place.

“That isn’t what I asked you to forgive me for.”

Piccolo’s eyes went wide and he let out a cry of shock as there was a great flash of light.

~MC~MC~MC~

“And you’re sure?” I asked Mr. Popo.

“I am,” he said with a soft smile as he replanted some flowers; I followed behind with a watering can. “The Dragon Balls only came about through Kami. He did it rather naturally but unexpectedly. He was rather surprised when they were the result of his strange urges.”

“And no other Guardian created them.”

Mr. Popo nodded. “Kami was the first.” He paused. “But you already knew all this.”

I grimaced at that. “Kami… told you about me then?”

“He did,” Mr. Popo said. “But it is fine… I will help you in this lie. I understand you are not ready to tell the others of your true origins. But-“ he patted my knee, “-have some faith in them, Kevin.”

My eyes went wide at Mr. Popo knowing my actual name but I swallowed that shock all the same. “Okay…” I got out. “So we have a way to lead them to realize that Namek is the answer. Wish back Roshi… and hopefully without Frieza this time learning about-“

I stopped as I heard Piccolo cry out and at once I was racing towards Kami’s house, throwing up magical shields as I saw the light shining out of the windows. ‘Tell me that idiot didn’t decide to attack Kami!’ I thought with growing horror as I hurried towards the building. ‘The last thing we need is those two killing each other… I thought Piccolo was adjusting far better this time than he did in canon but maybe-‘

I came to a halt, Mr. Popo just behind me, as we stared at the single Namekian.

Single.

“Oh… oh my,” Mr. Popo whispered, taking a step forward, hand held out. “My friend?”

The Namekian looked down at himself. He looked very much like Piccolo but there some minor differences. The face was a touch softer. Not weaker but… some of the harshness that Piccolo always had, even in his calm moments, was gone. There was a serene aura about him now. Calm. Collected. Focused. He looked a touch older… not much, just maybe a few years, but it was there. He was wearing a blend of Piccolo’s clothes and Kami’s, so that he looked rather like a warrior monk. He looked stronger too… a bit more muscular than Piccolo and definitely stronger than Kami. It was rather like if Piccolo had dedicated himself to becoming a being of peace or Kami dedicated himself to being a time-tested warrior. A blending of strength, wisdom, determination, and grace.

But the biggest change was the sense of… completion.

The two… had become the one.

Whole.

“Oh… fuck,” I murmured.

The Namekian looked down at himself.

“…of course I’d be that rash and stupid,” the Nameless Namekian, the re-fused Kami and Piccolo, groused. He sounded very much like Piccolo but… more like Super Piccolo. One who had found friendship and companionship and had lost the bitter drive and replaced it with a love not just for the Earth but himself. He smirked sardonically as he looked himself over before realizing we were staring at him and suddenly become… bashful. It was so odd because he sounded almost exactly like Piccolo but it was so wrong for him to seem so flustered. “Uh… so… the thing is…”

“Fuck,” I muttered again.

“Yeah,” he said finally.

He blinked.

“You being from another universe explains a lot.”

“THAT’S WHAT YOU’RE FOCUSED ON!?!?!”

Chapter Text

“...so what do we call him?”

Bulma whipped around and glared at Krillin, who waved his hands back and forth rapidly across his face in an attempt to ward off any attack she might send his way. “THAT IS YOUR FIRST QUESTION!?!?”

“Well… I mean…” Krillin stammered, “its just that… do we call him Piccolo? Kami?”

“I mean, he isn’t actually either one of them anymore, is he?” Yamcha asked.

“Technically I think he’s both of them,” Tien muttered. He looked out across the Lookout to where Goku was sparring with the Namekian Warrior we found ourselves debating about.

“Technically technically,” I chimed in, “Piccolo and Kami were him. They splinted off from our new friend there.”

“But is he our friend?” Chiaotzu asked, scratching his head.

“Exactly!” Krillin declared. “We need to be figuring out if… uh…” He threw his hands up in the air. “This is why we need a name for him!”

“A combination of names?” Yamcha suggested. “Kamiccolo?”

Chiaotzu shook his head. “Piccami.”

“Pami?” Krillin suggested. “Or Kiccolo?”

Bulma rounded on the others once again. “OUR FRIEND JUST MERGED WITH KAMI!” she bellowed. “CAN WE FOCUS ON THAT?!?!”

Chichi reached over and placed a hand on Bulma’s shoulder. “We are all confused. None of us know what to do here… you can’t blame anyone for handing the situation differently than you.” Bulma deflated at that, shoulders slumping.

‘It is a good question though,’ I thought to myself as I watched Goku spare with the Namekian. ‘What do we consider this being?’ In the show when Kami and Piccolo had rejoined it was less of them becoming one being again and more that Kami gave Piccolo the power the Nameless Namekian had once held. Piccolo had shown some flashes of Kami, mellowing out a bit, but even then he was basically the same as he had been moments before. ‘But not our new friend.’

The fusion we were dealing with was a true blending of Kami and Piccolo. There was wisdom there and grace and a sense of dignity that Piccolo had tried to pull off but failed due to his more dark and brooding form. But it wasn’t a younger Kami either, as he had an intensity and a drive that Kami had never possessed. This was not a being who would remain hiding on the Lookout, watching as others fought to protect the Earth. He was a warrior, plain and simple, and he would fight.

“I mean,” Yamcha said, cutting into my thoughts, “how do we treat him even? Is he Kami? Piccolo?”

“He appears to have the memories of both,” Isco stated. “I have also gone through some of the fights Kami had at the World Martial Arts Tournament, when he was fighting within the body of the human Shen. Several of his tactics there have already been demonstrated in his spar against Goku. They are one and the same.” The droid paused. “As for his name I believe he will need to decide that. It is his right.”

“Isco makes a good point,” Chichi said. “This new warrior does deserve the right to name themselves.” She paused. “Though… if they aren’t opposed… it wouldn’t hurt if we came up with a name for them, just until they selected one of their own.”

“Pami it is!” Krillin declared.

“Or,” Isco said flatly, “Senza.”

Bulma frowned. “Without?” When the rest of us stared at her she added, “Its Italian. It means Without.”

“The closest I could think of to ‘Nameless’. He is without a name so we can call him Senza until he selects one.”

Tien shrugged. “Better than anything I can think of.”

“But,” Chichi added, “we will respect his wishes.”

Isco though titled his head. “I am surprised you are all taking this so well.”

“Well, I mean it is odd,” Yamcha said. “People usually don’t merge with other people but that might be normal for Piccolo’s people.”

“Or it could be completely weird for them too,” Tien said. “We honestly don’t k now.”

“But we aren’t going to judge him, if this is what he wanted. He seems happy enough. And I bet we humans do a lot of strange things, at least from his point of view.”

“That is rather mature of you,” Isco said.

“Thanks!” Yamcha declared.

“Though I was referring to the fact that there are no Dragon Balls anymore.”

Everyone’s eyes went wide.

“And there it is,” I murmured.

“We… we have no Dragon Balls,” Krillin whispered.

“I mean, I knew we’d have a wait…” Tien murmured.

“But now we have no Dragon Balls!” Chiaotzu let out a cry of horror, pressing his hands to his cheeks.

“What… what… what if something happens?!” Bulma began to fret. “What if some threats comes along and we need the Dragon Balls?”

Chichi reached over and grabbed Gohan, hugging him close even as the little boy continued to watch the newly named Senza spar with his father. “I just assumed we’d find some way to recharge them. Have Kayos ask the Scroll of Knowledge how to get past the penalties of the Dragon Moon…”

“We have no Dragon Balls!” Chiaotzu screamed in terror.

I glanced at Isco. “How long do we let the druggies go through withdrawals before we help them?”

“I’m not for sure… this is rather entertaining.”

“You can’t get Bulma to give you the ability to eat popcorn though if she is freaking out.”

“That is very true, sir.”

I held up my hand and formed a Flash Bang, bouncing it in my hands several times before tossing it into the air. The spell made it that I was unaffected by it, hearing nothing and seeing nothing. But for everyone else?

They Z Fighters cried out as the Flash Bang exploded, blinding them and clearly making their ears ring. Isco had managed to shut off his audio and visual sensors but that was about it. Though I was surprised to see Senza and especially Gohan not react. I saw movement from the corner of my eye and saw Mr. Popo, who waved his hand and caused bubbles of magic appear briefly over his and the other two’s heads before they popped.

“Now then, is everyone willing to act like adults and actually talk in a mature manner?” I asked, placing my hands on my hips.

“What!?” Yamcha cried out.

“You didn’t think that one through, did you sir?” Isco commented.

I let out a sigh. “I’ll give them a few minutes.”

~MC~MC~MC~

King Kai smirked as he looked over his planet. “Now then, Bubbles? Gregory? We must be ready for with Master Roshi shows up. I want to make a good impression on him… and have him so amazed by my planet that he at once recognizes that I am the greatest martial arts trainer in the North Galaxy!”

He set down two buckets of soapy water.

“Now. We’ll start with making sure my car is nice and clean. Waxed too. Then we’ll hit the house. I want the windows to sparkle! After that should be the lawn-“

“Eh, no need ta go all out for me!”

King Kai puffed out his cheeks in annoyance. “This isn’t for you, Bubbles! Its for Master Roshi! I want to make sure that he is impressed. I mean sure, I don’t really need to impress HIM because I am the great King Kai but I know that Yamcha sees him as his first instructor and I don’t want him looking at me and wondering how a slob could teach his student so many amazing things! So we’ll start with-“

What had just happened finally caught up to King Kai.

“Bubbles? You can talk?”

The monkey chattered in response.

“Actually sir,” Gregory said, pointing behind King Kai. He slowly turned behind him to find Master Roshi standing there, looking over the small planet with interest.

“I mean, it ain’t no Kame House but its still nice enough if you’re looking for a more suburban style.”

King Kai fell onto his side, twitching.

“Eh?” Roshi said, confused. “Ya alright?”

“Am… am…” King Kai leapt to his feet and darted over to Roshi, getting right in his face. “What are you doing here?”

“I was told I was invited! I think King Yemma wanted ta keep me away from his daughter. Not sure why… I have plenty of experience with bigger gals and know how ta make it just as pleasin’ for them as it is for sexy skinny girls… hell, sometimes its better if the lady has some padding to her. Never hurt your balls banging up against a nice pillow of an ass-“

“HOW DID YOU GET HERE!?!” King Kai exclaimed, throwing his hands up in the air.

Roshi blinked at that before jerking his thumb behind him. “I ran that there path. They made it out to be harder than it was.”

King Kai felt like his entire face was twitching. It might very well have been. “You… you ran Snake Way in only 2 days!?!” he finally screamed, Bubbles and Gregory running for cover. “It takes King Yemma weeks to do it! Yamcha took months!”

“What can I say?” Roshi said with a sniff. “I managed it easily. Was highly motivated ta get here.”

~One Day Earlier…~

Princess Snake bared her fangs as she glared at her guest. “I invite you into my home and you decide to watch me as I go for a swim?”

“Hey, you were the one that told me ta make myself at home!” Rohsi declared. “And you were peepin’ on me! I saw ya!”

“That isn’t important!” the Otherworlder declared, not even trying to refute what Roshi had claimed. “You will pay for taking advantage of my hospitality!”

And with that Princess of Snake way began to swell and grow, arms disappearing into her sides as her hair was absorbed into her head as she grew larger and larger, becoming the Goddess of Snake Way.

Roshi… merely smirked.

“Oh… if ya think that is gonna keep me from feelin’ anything…”

Princess Snake blinked at that.

“Normally its only my snake I like ta milk! HEHEHEHE!”

~TEN MINUTES LATER~

“AND STAY OUT!” Princess Snake roared, spitting Roshi just short of the end of Snake Way.

~MC~MC~MC~

“So anyway,” Roshi said with a grin, looking around King Kai’s planet, “this is where ya trained Yamcha, eh? I can tell this is a great place ta learn how ta fight… gravity builds up strength and there isn’t anything to distract ya but also avoid keepin ya from goin’ mad with nothin’ ta notice.”

“Exactly!” Kign Kai said, throwing his arms in the air before gesturing at Roshi. “That’s what I try to explain to everyone but they refuse to listen. You need some solitude in order to remain focused on your training but that doesn’t mean you can’t have some nice things to remind you what you are fighting for.”

“Though you could stand ta add a few things,” Roshi said with a sniff, rubbing his finger along the underside of his nose.

That had King Kai at once twitching. He loved his planet and thought it was utterly perfect. There was NOTHING that needed to be added to it! Not a thing! It had everything it could possibly need!

…never mind that it had once been a lot bigger but Beerus was a sore loser. Still, it didn’t matter! His planet was completely perfect!

“And just WHAT do you think would be nice to add to my planet?” King Kai asked, ready to pounce on whatever foolish idea the human had.

“Well…” Roshi said, drawing out the word, “if it were me I’d add a nice little swimmin’ pool.”

King Kai blinked.

“Nothin’ too big. Just something ta jump inta when ya got a bit too heated up. Also work ta help practice your breathing.” He looked up at his halo. “Not that I have ta worry about that anymore! Heheheheh!”

King Kai opened his mouth… only to slowly close it, rubbing his chin in thought. “Huh. That isn’t a bad idea. Get up, eat breakfast, do some exercises, then have a nice relaxing float. Maybe get me some of those water wings, just for safety’s sake.”

“See! I told ya it was a good idea!” Roshi said with a grin. “Now then, let’s get out of here.”

“What?” King Kai said, shaking his head as visions of him dressed in a rather nice one piece swimsuit danced through his head. “Get out of here?”

“Of course! There is a whole wide Otherworld out there and I bet you anything that there is some nightclub out there full of sexy angels just looking for a good time! The hottest ones in all the universe!”

~MC~MC~MC~

“Hmm?’ Whis said, suddenly looking up before shrugging and going back to his dusting.

~MC~MC~MC~

“Aren’t you here to train?” King Kai asked.

“Course I am!” Roshi said. “But I’m also dead! Which means I got all the time in the world! So why not test out these dead bones and make sure they are still lively.”

King Kai stared at the old man in confusion. “I… I don’t know if-“

“Come on. Wouldn’t ya like some sexy winged gal ta play with them antenna?”

Said antenna instantly went straight up.

“I suppose if we got my car on Snake Way we could make the drive pretty quick… I know a few offshoots that aren’t easy to see that could get us to some of the nightlife in Otherworld…”

“Now you’re talking!” Roshi proclaimed. “Bug! Monkey! Get in the car! Time ta get some tail!”

~MC~MC~MC~

“You guys okay?” Goku asked, watching as his friends and family continued to wiggling their fingers in their ears and blink their eyes in an attempt to get their focus back. He wasn’t quite sure what was going on… Kayos had stated that they were dealing with ‘what happens when you overact and freak out’ but Goku wasn’t sure what that meant.

He glanced over at Pic… at Senza (as he’d been informed by Isco; the fusion of Kami and Piccolo had accepted the name as perfectly fine till he decided what he wanted to call himself) to make sure he was fine before sitting down next to Chichi, who kept squeezing her eyes shut only to pop them open.

“We will be,” Bulma said darkly, glaring at Kayos… or trying to as she was looking in the wrong direction.

“Maybe next time don’t have a panic attack because Big Papa Shenron isn’t around to give you a bump,” Kayos commented.

“Big Papa Shenron?” Goku asked, confused.

“It’s a reference to you guys abusing the Dragon Balls.”

Goku considered that for a moment. “I guess that’s far. We have really come to rely upon them recently.”

“What was that move?” Senza asked. “The one you performed to blind them?”

“Combined Solar Flare with an Auditory version. I call it a Flash Bang because any of you can learn it so no need to stick to my naming convention.”

Isco made a clicking nose. “I wondered if you realized you had been doing that.”

“Not on purpose… mostly just me taking spells that I liked and adopting them but as I begin to create my own I fell into a pattern naming…” he trailed off, looking at the group. “Okay, so lets get to the point: You guys have been abusing the Dragon Balls for FAR too long and now you have no choice.”

“I am sorry,” Senza said solemnly, dipping his head, eyes shut. “Kami was just so desperate to deal with the gaping hole my splitting caused-“

“None of that,” Kayos said firmly, holding up a hand. “You were hurting Senza, and you did what you believed would be best to stop that pain. NO ONE is going to judge you for that.”

“I’ll judge him,” Bulma muttering in annoyance. “You couldn’t have waited a bit longer for us to come up with some plan?”

Kayos narrowed his eyes but it was Goku who spoke. “Bulma, that isn’t fair at all. How would you like to have to go about for years knowing there was a way for you to be whole but you couldn’t because everyone wanted to use something you had created? Kami and Piccolo are more than the Dragon Balls!”

Bulma blushed at that, mumbling out an apology.

“You do all have a right to be upset,” Senza stated. “What Kami did… what I did… was rash. Believe me, Piccolo did not agree with it either and was rather shocked when it was done.”

Gohan walked over to Senza, pressing a hand to his pantleg. “So Mr. Piccolo and Mr. Kami aren’t ever coming back?”

Senza crouched down, placing a hand on Gohan’s shoulder. “No, Gohan, I’m afraid not. But they aren’t truly gone either.” The little boy stared at him, confused. “Kami and Piccolo were two halves of the same whole. They make up me. I remember everything they remember. I did everything they did. The bad-“ And he grimaced at that, Goku knowing he was thinking of the evil he had done as King Piccolo, “-and the good.”

“You mean it?”

“I remember you and I having our first hot dog and how you wanted to have ketchup on it but not muster… but then snuck a bite of mine.” Gohan’s face lit up at that and at once he rushed forward, giving Senza a hug. Goku smiled at that and his grin grew a bit more when Senza did what Piccolo never would have and returned the hug. “Do not think of it as losing your friend, Gohan. This merely means that Kami can finally live his life again.”

Goku took a deep breath at that, glancing away from Senza. ‘That’s my fault. Kami wanted me to take over as the Guardian of Earth. At first I thought it was just a matter of him thinking he wanted to give me the job because… well, I really didn’t understand why he wanted to give me the job. I wasn’t the right choice at all and I told him so. I wanted to train and fight and be with my friends.’ He watched as Senza quietly talked to Kayos about… something, he wasn’t for sure what, but Gohan had went back to Chichi and was now chatting with her, telling her how Senza was just like Mr. Piccolo only he also in a way like Kami, as if they hadn’t heard Senza themselves. ‘But now I see… he was tired. He was ready to go off and live his life. And I prevented him from doing that.’

But just as quickly as he had begun getting down on himself he smiled.

‘But now… he can.’

Senza turned to the group. “I know it will take some adjusting but I hope you will accept me into your group-“

“Of course, Senza!” Bulma declared. “I am so sorry if we made you think that we wouldn’t!”

“Yeah, she’s right man,” Tien said with a firm nod.

“And don’t worry about us only wanting you around because you used to be Kami and Piccolo,” Yamcha replied. “We’ll remember that while you might have been them you are now your own person.”

“Huh, I never considered that,” Krillin said, tilting his head. “I guess with two sets of memories combining together that would cause you to behave a bit different from how Piccolo or Kami used to.”

“And we’ll be happy to learn about you, Senza.”

The Namekian nodded at that. “And hopefully help me learn about myself.” And the slight smile that formed on his lips was so Piccolo that it made Goku chuckle. It was going to be so strange… and so amazing… to learn about this new friend.

“We should have a dinner!” Chichi suddenly proclaimed. “I know you don’t actually need to eat food, Senza, but I know Piccolo enjoyed it. Though I don’t know if Kami really ever ate anything…” She rubbed her chin. “I wonder if your tastes have changed. Piccolo liked some foods but maybe you’ll like others…”

“That’s a great idea!” Goku declared. “We could have a feast to welcome Senza!”

The others began to chat happily about all they wanted to do to formally bring Senza into the group. The Namekian just watched them talk, letting out a sniff and muttering that it wasn’t necessary. Another Piccoloism, Goku was sure of that.

It would be weird to see those parts he was so used to seeing from Kami coming from Piccolo only for Senza to be very… well… Piccolo.

“Alright, so a feast,” Kayos said, clapping his hands together. “And then we can begin figuring out how to get more Dragon Balls.”

“…what?” Tien said slowly, utterly baffled.

Goku didn’t blame him… he was confused too.

Mr. Popo stepped forward. “Mr. Kayos asked me a question that led the two of us to realize something rather important.”

“And that was?” Bulma asked.

“What happened to the Dragon Balls made by the last Guardian?”

Krillin’s eyes went wide. “Hey! That’s a great idea! We could find those Dragon Balls and make a wish on them! Maybe they would allow us to bring Master Roshi back.”

“You think so?” Goku asked, getting excited at the thought. “I mean, I know Kayos said we use them too much but it isn’t fair that Master Roshi died before Senza came into being and he should meet him-“

“Hold up,” Bulma said, raising her hand to silence Goku. “I did all sorts of research on the Dragon Balls when I first began hunting them. And there is only records of the ones… that… Kami…” She slowly looked at Mr. Popo, who nodded.

“It was not the Guardian who created the Dragon Balls… but Kami.”

Goku frowned, brow screwing up as he thought that over. “Wait… so if it isn’t a Guardian thing but a Kami thing… and Senza is Kami…” He turned to look at the Namekian who shook his head. “Oh. You can’t make the Dragon Balls?”

“No,” he stated. “I was only able to create them when I split into Piccolo and Kami.”

“Something we should be glad about,” Yamcha pointed out.

“Yamcha!” Bulma scolded. “That isn’t nice to say.”

“Why not? Do you think it would have been fine and dandy for King Piccolo to be able to make magic wish balls?”

Bulma at once went pale. “Nevermind.”

“Senza,” Isco said, the Namekian turning to the droid, “do you know WHY only Kami could make the Dragon Balls?”

“I am not for sure,” he admitted. “When I first arrived on earth my ship contained much information. Lessons to teach me and aid me on the planet. But no matter how much I tried I found myself unable to master many of the techniques while others came easily. It was only when…”

“Senza?” Chiaotzu said when the Namekian grew quiet. “What’s wrong?”

“I know why I wanted to be the Guardian,” he whispered. “I know why I was so obsessed. The instructions stated that I could only create the source of great power by becoming the ‘noble protector of a planet’.”

Mr. Popo slowly nodded. “That does make sense, considering what I remember you were like when you first arrived.”

“But to become the Guardian I had to remove everything that would be ‘evil’. And my drive for that power-“

“Wasn’t noble. Which is why you forgot.” Mr. Popo shook his head. “And it is likely that his time captured and sealed away caused King Piccolo to forget that fact himself, becoming obsessed only with ruling without remembering why.”

Bulma nodded, pressing her togneu against the inside of her cheek. “And that’s why Lord Slug couldn’t make his own Dragon Balls. He was the ruler of Planet Slug but wasn’t its noble protector.”

“I believe I am quite glad for that,” Isco said dryly.

Senza sighed. “I feel you are right. Which is why I can not help you now. I could never become the Guardian again… my intentions would not be pure.” He furrowed his brow. “It is so odd… as Kami and Piccolo I had no idea who I was, how I had ended up on Earth. But now I remember that I came here in a ship from another world…”

“Huh,” Raditz said, everyone whipping around at his simple comment. Goku was ashamed to admit he’d forgotten that his brother was even there. “So the rumors were true.”

“Rumors?” Chichi said, looking to her-

“Oh!” Goku suddenly exclaimed. “What is Raditz to you, Chichi?”

“What?”

“Well, he’s my brother so that means he’s Gohan’s Uncle so what is he to you?”

“…my brother-in-law.”

“Neat. So that means that you’re his sister-in-law. Raditiz, Chichi is-“

“I know, Kakarot,” his brother said dryly.

“Raditz, you said something about rumors?” Senza pressed.

The newest member of the Z Fighters (or rather the second newest… kind of… did Senza count as a new member or not?) let out a huff at that. “There have been these rumors that Namekians could perform powerful magic. Not like trick-boy over there-“ Kayos gave a wave at that, “-but other magic. Powerful magic. No one knew what but it was said that if you could get hold of a Namekian then you could gain all sorts of things. Lord Frieza sent us after many Namekians, whenever we learned of one being spotted, but those that we defeated died without telling us anything. They weren’t ‘noble guardians’.”

“Then what we need is a noble guardian,” Kayos said. “And I’m willing to bet Senza’s home planet has at least one.”

“You… you aren’t suggesting we go to… Namek Planet, are you?” Krillin asked.

“Its our best chance to get a hold of Dragon Balls and bring back Master Roshi,” Kayos pointed out.

“And I believe my ship may hold the answer,” Senza suggested. “Within may be the instructions on how to find my home planet.” He frowned. “Though I fear it won’t be in good condition.”

“Bulma can handle that!” Goku declared. “She’s amazing with machines! Give her a week with it and I bet she could make it better than ever!”

“I don’t know about that,” Bulma said, “but I’d be willing to try.”

“And I can help,” Raditz said. Everyone looked at him and he scoffed. “Yeah, there were techs and mechanics to work on my Saiyan Pod but if it got damaged while I was out in space I had to repair it myself or wait for a patrol to come by… and if you had to wait that just meant you were better off killing yourself before you had to explain to Frieza why you were delayed.”

Bulma considered Goku’s brother for a moment before nodding. “Yes… I think that would make things go a lot quicker.”

“Then let’s go!” Goku declared. “Let’s find Senza’s ship!”

“Tomorrow,” Chichi said firmly, grabbing onto Goku’s arm and stopping him before he flew off. “I think we all need to rest, especially after what happened with Lord Slug and Senza.”

“You are all, of course, welcome to spend the night here,” Mr. Popo told them. “I can see about having some rooms prepared for you.”

“We’re used to roughing it,” Goku said proudly; Yamcha, Raditz, Tien, and even Senza nodding in agreement.

“BUT if we can avoid that…” Bulma said dangerously, glaring at the others who gulped and quickly nodded in agreement.

“Then its settled,” Chichi said with a smile. “We’ll send some people down to get food and prepare a nice meal to welcome Senza to the family. And then in the morning a few of us will go to where your ship is and see what we can salvage.”

The plan made the group began to part, some flying down from the Lookout to get the food needed to not just make a feast but one that could survive four Saiyans, others going to inspect the rooms that Mr. Popo could prepare for them.

But the genie in question paused to place a hand on Senza’s shoulder.

“Welcome back, my friend.”

“I never left you, Mr. Popo,” Senza said. “So, no need for that.”

It was a very Piccolo thing to say. A very Kami thing to say.

And then, in a move that wasn’t Kami or Piccolo, Senza bent down and gave Mr. Popo a hug.

“But… thank you all the same.”

~MC~MC~MC~

I glanced over at Senza as he walked over to me, Mr. Popo just a few steps behind. The dinner had gone well, with Goku actually managing to control himself in the name of seeing Senza’s reaction to sampling the different foods. Of course he didn’t actually need to eat, just did it for the taste, so he had had very little and let Goku have much of his share. I was pretty sure doing that alone had made him Goku’s new best friend.

“It’s a beautiful view,” I said. “That’s the nice thing about learning how to fly… my fear of heights went right out the window. Used to be that I would have been terrified standing this close to the edge of the Lookout.” I took a step into the nothingness, my magic flaring out as I began to walk around the emptiness of the sky like I was strolling through a mall. “Now… doesn’t bug me at all. Its nice.”

“It is a lovely view,” Senza stated. “It will be something I miss… though I must admit that I am looking forward to experiencing more of the world. Actually interacting with it. I have some memories of doing so but Piccolo wasn’t exactly the most… explorative.”

“Nice way of putting it,” I said as I returned to the Lookout. “So… I am guessing you didn’t come here to chat about the view?”

“I do not like lying to our friends,” Senza stated.

“Yeah,” I said softly, looking away from him. “I get it.”

“We could have informed them about Namek without all those games.”

“They got to the end though,” I pointed out. “And it helped them learn more about you AND let Raditz settle more into being part of the group. I do worry about him… He’s mostly been alone and now-“

“Avo,” Senza said, cutting me off, “you didn’t do it for either of us. You did it to protect yourself.”

“…yeah,” I repeated, not denying it. “Fine, yeah.” My tone was a bit more forceful. “I am selfish and scared and I don’t want the gang to know that I’m from another universe.”

Mr. Popo spoke up. “They have accepted Piccolo, Kami, and Senza.”

“Oh that’s different.”

“How?”

“…it just is!” I complained, knowing that I was sounding whiny. “It just is.” I jabbed my finger at the two of them. “And yeah, you might think its easy for me to just tell them all the answers but I’m not the Scroll of Knowledge! What I know may not come to pass. Hell, much of it hasn’t!” I waved at Senza. “You never really came into being, Senza. That’s why I have no better name for you. Kami and Piccolo-“

Senza shut his eyes, cutting me off. “Kami bonded with Piccolo due to a great threat but it more amplified the powers Piccolo had than reformed them back into me.”

That caused Mr. Popo to frown. “How can that be?”

Senza’s brow furrowed. “On… Namek… Piccolo joined with another Namekian. Nail. It was a different ritual, one that allowed a Namekian to give another of their kind their strength, rather than blending the two. As such Piccolo was no longer truly one half of myself and the fusion between him and Kami could not recreate me… Piccolo was too strong and dominated the personality.”

“Okay, reading my damn mind?” I said, glaring at Senza. “Not cool!”

Senza though flashed me a rather Piccolo smile. “You make it so easy though, Avo. Its like you are screaming your thoughts.”

“Ha fuckity ha,” I grumbled.

The Namekian grew solemn and serious after a moment. “You are right though. In the timeline you saw I never came into being. And you said Goku died instead of Yamcha.”

“Exactly. Chichi wasn’t a warrior and Bulma never made power armor. Krillin didn’t develop Selfless Style. Tien and Chiaotzu never explored their connection. Yamcha was a joke who was best known for dying to a Saibaman. Raditz died and certainly never joined us. And of course the obvious-“

“You weren’t here,” Mr. Popo stated.

I held out my hand and created a ball of light. “Yeah… that changes things.” I snuffed the magic out. “We have no idea what could happen now. What changes could result because of my actions. I will do what I can to help the others but we can’t give them false hope. This secret remains between the three of us.”

“…very well, Avo,” Senza said, dipping his head. “I will respect your decision. But don’t be surprised when this blows up in your face.”

“Aw, you do care Piccolo,” I teased only to catch myself. “Wow, I was the first one to fuck that up.”

“I imagine you won’t be the last,” Senza said.

Mr. Popo though looked up at the sky. “Namek then…”

“Uh huh,” I said, considering how much to say before finally deciding, “and… depending on how things go… we might find a new Guardian of the Earth up there. A Namekian who embraces the title without needing to chop themselves apart. One that can truly grow into the role and be a good friend.”

I swallowed.

“Though, like I said… who knows what I’ve changed…”

~MC~MC~MC~

Duri trembled, forcing himself to keep his head down. That last thing he wanted to do was make the wrong move and anger the commander that was standing before him.

“Now…” the muscular pink-skinned warrior said, coming to a stop before Duri’s kneeling form, “I want you to explain just why you thought it was so important to race here and demand an audience with your Lord. I’ll then decide if it is worth sending up the chain of command. And you better pray it is. Because, and I do want to make this real clear for ya, if you are wasting my time… that means you were going to waste HIS time. And you know what he does to people that waste his time.”

The orange alien warrior rapidly nodded his head, though he kept silent. There was a reason why there were only 10,000 of Duri’s kind left in the Galaxy, when once they had numbered in the billions. Their Queen had dared to keep the Force’s envoy waiting and their retribution for that insult had been swift and deadly.

“So… speak.”

“I…” Duri swallowed back a mouthful of phlegm and tried again. “I was sent to secure applies to help with the experiments being done by Dr. Malaka to improve the Healing Pods-“

“Do you think I care one lick about Malaka is doin’?”

“Right… of course,” Duri said hurriedly. “I went to a market place to secure the shipment when I noticed some slavers who had no idea what they had on their hands. They thought it was just some creature with bad skin, found near the Demon’s Eyes. But… I knew exactly what it was: a Namekian.”

“We have plenty of warriors,” the commander replied. “We don’t need a Namekian… even if we could get him ta fight for us. All the ones we’ve even encountered have always fought us to the bitter end. Now, I suppose he might make for some fun, in terms of training-“

“He’s not a warrior!” Duri declared, cutting his superior off. “He’s… not a warrior. Not in any way, shape or form.” He swallowed. “And you know what they’ve said about the Namekians. That there are two tribes…”

“…show me.”

At once Duri scrambled to his feet and led his superior to the small cage where the Namekian was. While the figure was large, with broad shoulders and thick arms and a huge chin no one would ever tremble at the sight of him. He was curled up in the cell, hugging his knees to his chest, rocking back and forth while quietly keening. He was a pathetic creature, one that had clearly been abused over and over but had yet to learn to accept his place in the universe.

A Namakian. But not a warrior.

“Ya did good,” the supervisor declared… before raising his hand, charging it with energy. “But… I don’t think you need to present this to-“

“If I’m wrong you’ll be punished!” Duri said quickly, thrusting his hands in front of him in a panic. “If you kill me and this is wrong you’ll be punished…”

His commander considered him for a long moment.

“We can share the reward… but I will take the full blame if I’m wrong.”

The hand came down, energy dissipating.

“I like the way you think.” He reached up and touched his scouter. “Zarbon? This is Dodora. Let Lord Frieza know we have a Namekian.”

Chapter Text

“So these rocks… you think they are special?”

Tien glanced over at me. “What, you mean magical? How would I know that… you are the magic expert.”

“Do NOT let Baba ever hear you say that again. The pain she’d force on both of us…”

At once the triclops grimaced. “Yeah… don’t think I want to press that button at all.” I nodded and went back to rubbing my chin as I stared at the rock formation. “But still, shouldn’t you be able to tell?”

“I wasn’t referring to magic. Bad choice of words. I mean do you think they are special to someone?”

“I… don’t follow.”

I waved at one, a twisted orange formation with a hole running through it so it looked like it a sewing needle. “I wonder if anyone lived out here,” I said. “Some tribe of people hundreds or even thousands of years ago. And these rocks were special to them because of their structure. Like they held spiritual meaning. The shamans or war chiefs or whatever you want to call them would look upon these rocks and go ‘These were crafted by the gods. Look upon them and honor what came before us, children’.”

Tien helplessly shrugged. “I have no idea.”

“And I mean there must be animals that use these things for shelter. That hide from the sun or burrow into the stone or place their nests on top of it.” Tien just stared at me helplessly, not having an answer. “Well, works for me.”

And with that I thrust out my hand and channeled a sphere of magic and fired it right at the rocky outcrop we had been talking about. The magic was nothing fancy, to the point that it didn’t even have a name. It was like a Ki Blast… any mage with a bit of training and skill could fire one off.

The ball hit with a boom that reduced the outcrop into little more than dust.

“Also it is highly rude of me to destroy something that was millions of years old. Very disgraceful.”

“What was that!?!” Tien exclaimed, leaping away from me and tensing.

But I was focused on my hands, frowning as I stared at the ebony energy that was now dancing around my fingers.

“Aw come on, that little? I should have at least gotten bit more…”

“Oh,” Tien said, relaxing a touch. “This is an evil magic thing.”

“I’ve saved the world twice,” I point out. “I’m out of balance… I’m like a car with two tires over inflated and the other two having gone flat.”

“I’ll just take your word on that,” Tien commented and I wondered what Tien’s life was like outside of training. Did he not go into town for McDonalds? Or sit down on a couch with a beer and watch a game? Was Master Roshi’s place the most modern he got? “So, trying to boost up your evil magic?”

“Again, out of balance,” I muttered. “There are ways I could quickly boost it but I’ve already told Baba no.”

“Did I even want to know?” Tien asked.

“Her first suggest was I kill one of you guys,” I grunted. Tien’s eyes widened at that. “I would never-“

“No… not you. Her. Here I thought that losing Master Roshi would mellow her out a bit.”

“We are getting new Dragon Balls,” I pointed out. “So she figures that someone else could wish on them to bring one of you back while I could reap the benefits of the evil of killing a defender of the earth.”

“Well… other than having to deal with all of us when you kill one of us,” Tien pointed out.

“Isco was very handy in drawing up diagrams of who I could kill that wouldn’t get me instantly pulverized.”

Tien frowned at that, looking over to where Isco was going over Senza’s ship with Bulma, seeing what he could pull up from the computers. “Do I even want to know my place on the list.”

“No,” I said, holding out my hand and forming another magic sphere. “You really don’t.” Tien tensed and after a moment I casually made the magic dissipate. “Come on, scaring Tien should have netted me a bit of evil magic!” I complained to myself.

At once Tien relaxed again. “That isn’t funny.”

“It’s a little funny,” I argued. I didn’t mention that him and Chiaotzu, if I doubled them up, were at the bottom of Isco’s list.

“Alright,” Bulma said, dusting her hands off as she emerged from the Namekian ship. “Isco says he has access to the main system and Mr. Popo learned how to pilot the thing… somehow.” She tilted her head. “I honestly don’t know HOW he knows, since Senza doesn’t know, but he can teach one of us how to pilot it… assuming I keep the controls the same.” She rubbed her chin. “All depends on how much time we want to spend upgrading the ship. I mean, we need to get it back up to space faring condition but…”

“Shouldn’t we head out right away?” Tien said. “Master Roshi needs to be resurrected in a year, right?”

“We don’t know how the Namekian Dragon Balls work,” I pointed out. “And it also might be an afterlife thing.”

“Eh, not an afterlife thing,” Master Roshi said in all our heads.

“M-Master Roshi?” Bulma exclaimed in shock, looking about.

“In the flesh… or not. Heheheh!”

“Oh, that was a good one!” King Kai chimed in.

“Wait,” I said slowly, “you’re on King Kai’s planet… already?!?!”

“Course I am!” Master Roshi proclaimed. “Was easy enough… with all that trainin’ I did I was more than strong enough ta fly the entire length of Snake Way.”

“…I don’t believe you,” I said slowly, sensing there had to be more to the tale.

But Tien cut me off. “Master Roshi, we’re working on getting the Dragon Balls from Namek-“

“Yeah yeah, I know already!” Roshi proclaimed. “That’s why I’m reachin’ out ta ya. Wanted ya ta know that while I can’t wait ta get back ta livin’ ya shouldn’t take a bunch of risks just ta try and get me back in a hurry. I’m keepin’ my body up here and from what King Kai has seen the Namekian Dragon Balls are strong enough ta bring be back if you’re a touch late.”

Bulma let out a sigh of relief at that. “Well, that’s good,” she said. “Better than working under the gun. Now I can focus on actually getting the ship up to snuff.”

“But don’t risk pushing the deadline!” King Kai warned, causing Bulma to fall off the ramp of the ship.

“But you just said there was no deadline!” she screamed from where she had fallen.

“Heh, deadline,” I snickered. Tien looked at me. “Because he’s dead.”

I heard King Kai chortle at that. “That’s a good one! I’m gonna steal it!”

“Don’t steal my jokes!” I complained… not because I actually wanted to keep it but rather because I didn’t trust King Kai to tell the joke right.

“WHO CARES ABOUT THE JOKE!” Bulma screamed, zipping back onto her feet. “You said there was no deadline!”

“There isn’t,” King Kai said. But there might also be a deadline.”

“Which is it?” Bulma demanded.

“Look, we’re kinda working in uncharted waters here. I have no Idea if there is a deadline or not. The Namekian Dragon Balls might have the same deadline for bringing someone back as the ones Kami made. Or they might have a longer one. They might even have a shorter one!”

“You just said you’d observed the Namekians!”

“Its just an expression. Point is that we don’t know when the Dragon Balls’ time limit will be.”

“Or if they can do it at all,” Tien muttered.

“Wait, what was that now?” Roshi asked.

“Oh don’t worry about that!” King Kai said. “Just focus on getting our suits pressed! Deevee and Veecee are expecting us to pick them up in a few hours.”

“Wait a minute!” Bulma shouted, looking skyward. “Are you telling me that while we are busting our butts trying to bring you back to the world of the living, traveling to other planets to seek out mystical relics, you are going on double dates with King Kai!”

“…well, when ya put it like that- OW!” Roshi groaned and I looked to see Bulma had snapped her hand out. “How did ya manage ta slap me? I ain’t even on the same plane of existence as ya!”

“Break the connection before she hits me too!” King Kai said and suddenly all we could hear was silence.

“…I am going to wish that when the dragon brings him back he has erectile dysfunction!” Bulma roared.

Isco chose that moment to exist the ship. “So I am going to assume that someone was talking in your minds because all I heard was you three going crazy.”

“That’s what happened,” I informed him.

“Ah… then I can release Chiaotzu and NOT perform the brain dissection.” With that he walked back inside the ship.

“…he’s joking, right?” Tien asked.

“HELP!”

I glanced at Tien as we heard Chiaotzu scream. “With Isco…?”

~MC~MC~MC~

“So, how was your swim, Raditz?” Goku asked as his brother emerged from the ocean, water beading down his chest. They had all decided to return to the island for the moment, even with much of the research laboratory destroyed. Bulma was already bringing capsule houses for everyone to stay in and a quick search had confirmed her lab was undamaged from the battle with Vegeta and Nappa, meaning it was the best place to get to work on Senza’s ship.

“Hmmmpf… not bad.” He flicked out his left hand and a massive Great White Shark slammed down next to Goku, eyes rolled up in its skull and body littered with bruises. “This thing decided to come and try and bite me… its edible, right?”

“Anything is edible if you cook it right!” Goku declared.

That caused his older brother to tilt his head in bemusement. “You know, Kakarot, every time I think you are nothing like a Saiyan you say something like that and I feel like you spent your entire life on Planet Vegeta.”

“Thanks!” Goku declared. He tossed Raditz a towel and his brother began to dry off. As for Goku he was just relaxing, having decided to take a break from training in order to let his body heal up from all the fights they’d had in recent days. “What was it like?” he asked suddenly.

“Hmmm?”

“Planet Vegeta. What was it like?”

Raditz considered his brother for a long moment before finally sitting down on the sandy beach, legs stretched out before him. While Goku had stripped down to the bare minimum of his Gi, going with just the pants (Chichi had mentioned that he’d look good with a tan) Raditz had opted for a pair of swim trunks after everyone had begged him not to just swim naked. The two brothers thus sat in the sun, soaking up the rays as the ocean lapped just past their feet.

“It wasn’t like this planet,” Raditz finally said. “Living on Planet Vegeta was like fighting a battle every day. The air was thinner there… when I first got to a planet that was rich with air my head swam for a week. A single gulp of air was like taking ten breaths on Planet Vegeta. The water was also far saltier, so we had to constantly find ways to make it fit for drinking.

“That bred hard things. Us… and the animals. They were fierce, Kakarot, with hides that could repel all but the strongest blows and tough meat that took hours to tenderize. We had entire hordes of women whose entire job was to pound the meat with hammers to try and make it edible. That’s why whenever a Saiyan landed on a planet the first thing they did was get some decent food.” He scoffed. “Vegeta and Nappa used to claim it was all shit compared to Saiyan food because it was too tender and sweet but they just didn’t want to admit that when it came to cooking food was something Saiyans weren’t the best at.”

Goku made a face. “Man, I can’t imagine not having good meat!”

Raditz scoffed at that. “I got as much at dinner last night.”

“Vegeta… he said he was the Prince of All Saiyans. Is that true?”

“Unfortunately,” Raditz muttered. “Sometimes I wonder what life would have been like if he had died and someone else had led us.”

“What do you mean?” Goku asked, staring at his brother in confusion. “I mean, considering what he did to that guy Nappa he doesn’t seem like the greatest guy to work for…”

Raditz shook his head at that. “No. He wasn’t. Though I won’t be crying over Nappa. That man was a sadist, Kakarot. Cruel for the sake of being cruel. Utterly devoted to Vegeta though… King Vegeta saved his life-“

“Wait, so that has been a bit confusing,” Goku said, cutting his brother off and scratching his head. “I get that there is Prince Vegeta… and that our planet is CALLED Vegeta… but King Vegeta is someone else?”

That made Raditz glower. “Not by their choice. That… was King Cold’s doing. When he first arrived on our planet and… made our ‘alliance’… we had no king. We functioned in different tribes, fighting each other constantly. Cold killed the leaders of all the tribes and then selected one Saiyan and declared, “You are the king now. And because I don’t want to bother learning your name you will be Vegeta”. When he had a son and tried to introduce the boy to Cold he was informed the boy’s name was now Vegeta. Everyone figured out when Vegeta the Second had a son that he should also be named Vegeta until… well, now.”

“Wait a minute,” Goku said, trying to wrap his head around what his brother had just told him. “You mean that Vegeta, the very first one, was only chosen because he was picked at RANDOM!?! He didn’t do anything special? He wasn’t the best fighter or the smartest inventor or anything like that?”

That caused Raditz to let out a barking laugh. “Smart inventor? Please… King Vegeta the Third made our father look like a brilliant scientist!”

Goku didn’t quite understand why that was so funny but he got the general idea all the same… and he didn’t like it. He had always been taught that leaders should be the best, able to lead. He was the strongest fighter amongst his friends and family and as such they tended to look to him to lead them. But he looked to Master Roshi at times because he had the most knowledge. Bulma led them when it came to machines. Kayos led them if it involved trickery. It… it just made sense!

“Though don’t get me wrong,” Raditz said quickly, “King Vegeta… all of them… have been incredibly strong. They used their position to do all they could to make themselves the most powerful fighters on Planet Vegeta. If they hadn’t then they risked one of us taking over and so long as we had taken the name ‘Vegeta’ I don’t think Cold or Frieza would have minded. Probably found it amusing.” He let out a huff at that. “Unfair advantages, some liked to grumble…”

“So if one wasn’t strong enough?”

Raditiz smirked. “Its said that Vegeta had a brother… and he was dealt with before Frieza learned of him.”

“That’s horrible!” Goku exclaimed.

“That was life,” Raditz said with a shrug. “Even after Planet Vegeta fell we were forced to continue serving Prince Vegeta and Frieza. There were some of us that wanted to strike off on our own. To make our own fortunes. We argued that the alliance had been made with our planet and that was gone now. But Prince Vegeta refused.” He scoffed. “Frieza met with him and I think he told him how amazing he was and how powerful he was and fed the brat’s ego. Frieza has always had a soft spot for Vegeta… he saw him like a pet, I think, while Vegeta saw Frieza as one of the few people left in the galaxy who remembered his royal birth. Because he knows that without a planet the only thing giving him his title is his deeds and Frieza’s allowing of him to keep it. He loses that… and well, with his attitude, he would have died a long time ago to the rest of us. Nappa could have only protected him so much. We didn’t dare go against him so long as he held Frieza’s favor.

“So we were stuck with him and the 31 Saiyans that survived our planet’s destruction slowly got whittled down to 4. Stupid mistakes on everyone’s end. Some were just too cocky, used to being able to call upon an entire squad and now found themselves down to only two or three. Others did nothing wrong… it was just poor match ups. It doesn’t matter. It came down to us, brother, and Nappa, and Vegeta. And even now it’s down to three.”

He paused before smirking.

“Or rather four and a half.”

Goku let out a moan at that. “Please don’t mention that to Chichi! She’s still struggling with what happened to her!”

“Hmmmpf,” Raditz said with a huff. “I don’t see why its such a big deal for her. Saiyans are far more powerful and durable than humans. And our lifetimes are longer too.”

“Wait, what!??!” Goku exclaimed, eyes going wide at that. “How long could I end up living?”

“I honestly have no idea,” Raditz admitted. “From what I was told you didn’t see an old Saiyan because they died in battle.”

“Oh…” Goku said, suddenly having the mental image of a frail and wizen Chichi, looking a bit like Fortune Teller Baba, honestly, standing next to him as he looked young. “Still,” he said, shaking off those thoughts, “she isn’t doing well with suddenly being a different race.”

“Well, she needs to get used to it,” Raditz said before slowly glancing at Goku. “Unless you are going to do something foolish like wish on the Dragon Balls to make her human again.”

“What? No!” he exclaimed. “Honestly I’m not sure if that would even work… not sure its even possible!” Raditz nodded, his glower fading away at that bit of information. “Besides, I want to focus on bringing back Master Roshi and maybe finding out if there is another way for us to get Dragon Balls.” He leaned back, thinking about all his brother had told him. “You kept mentioning King Cold and Frieza… who are they?”

“God, Earth is in the boondocks, isn’t it?” Raditz joked. “King Cold used to be the Emperor of nearly a quarter of the known galaxy. No one really knows what species he is… no one was dumb enough to ask. All anyone knows is that he and his kind are insanely powerful. About 40 years ago Cold decided he was going to retire which really means he didn’t want to deal with the day to day operations of the Empire he had crafted. He placed his two sons, Frieza and Cooler, in charge, giving them each half of the Cold Force and letting them do whatever they wished. Cooler kept things basically the same, doing as his father had: going out with a few loyal warriors and testing themselves against a planet, bringing them to heel, and then moving on.” Raditz grew quiet. “Had it just been Cooler I think… I think we could have lived decent enough lives. He is cruel and dangerous but you know where you stand with him.”

“But not with Frieza?” Goku asked.

“No,” Raditz said darkly.

“You said he was the one that destroyed Planet Vegeta…”

“Our father learned of it. All the Saiyans were commanded to return to Planet Vegeta… a few, such as Prince Vegeta, took their time and that is what saved them. That and our father trying to stand against Frieza and stop him from his sick plans. Frieza is a sadist, Kakarot. A vile, heartless, cruel, destructive creature that only cares about his own whims. I know you promised to help me take him down but-“

“No buts,” Goku said firmly. “He’s your enemy then he’s my enemy. I don’t want to risk him ever harming the Earth… so that means we’ll have to get strong enough to stop him.”

Raditz merely nodded and the two went back to silently watching the ocean.

~MC~MC~MC~

I frowned as I walked into the kitchen and saw a feminine rear end wiggling slightly as it stuck out from the fridge, a monkey tail waggling back and forth. Cocking an eyebrow I stopped and just watched as, after about half a minute, Chichi pulled her head out of the fridge, arms overloaded with different platters and bowls carefully balanced in her arms while she bit down on a large slab of meat on a bone like she was Fred Flintstone. She turned and I watched, bemused, as she used her tail to grab another bowl before she kicked the door shut and moved towards the table.

It was only when she had set everything down that she finally realized I was standing there, letting out a little yelp before she glowered at me, just managing to catch her meat as it fell.

“You. Saw. Nothing.”

“I know noth-ting, noth-ting!” I declared with a grin, holding up my hands.

Chichi just glared before her stomach rumbled and she began to tear into the first hunk of meat. She tried to be dainty and refined while doing it but as time went on and I didn’t say a word she finally just gave in and began to devour the food much like Goku, Gohan, and Raditz did.

“Its this Saiyan blood!” she complained as she opened up a container of cold shredded chicken and, after a moment’s hestitation, gave in and just began to shovel it into her mouth. “I’ve always been able to eat a lot but now that I have full control it I’m hungry ALL THE TIME!”

“Yeah, I noticed,” I said dryly, walking over to the fridge and snagging some leftover pizza and tossing it into the microwave. “How are you handling all of… this?” I gestured at her.

“I have to relearn how to do everything,” Chichi complained. “I tried to make breakfast the other day and I broke the pot I was using. It just… crumpled in my hands! I keep nearly slamming my tail into doors…” Said appendage wiggled like it had a mind of its own, almost playfully. “But there are weird things too. Things I didn’t expect.”

“Like what?”

“Well… I feel less angry.” Chichi frowned. “I know I have a temper, Kayos. I won’t ever deny that. I’m very passionate and can get so mad. I thought with Saiyan blood I would be more angry but instead I feel more calm.”

“You didn’t gain Saiyan blood,” I pointed out to her. “You always had it. My wish just… balanced it out, I think. Giving you control of the Great Ape Form means the natural rage that was within it is now contained. Not tamed but… you aren’t going to lose yourself in it.”

“That’s so odd to think about,” Chichi said.

“Have you though?” I pressed. “Have you really?” She looked up at me. “Chichi… you just learned your mother wasn’t human. She was a Saiyan. I know you must be asking yourself a ton of questions concerning that. Worrying what it means for you.”

“I don’t know what you’re getting at.”

I shot her a cool stare. “So you aren’t wondering if your father knew?” I pressed. “Gohan was born with a tail… I imagine you were too. Did he just not see it? Or did he and he hid it? Why didn’t he say anything about Gohan? Why didn’t you have the small hole that Goku has on his back where his tail was removed?”

With each question Chichi dipped her head and began to eat a bit faster, trying to chew her food like they were the questions I knew were poking and prodding her.

“Listen…” I said softly, settling down next to her, “I’m not going to give some trite bullshit that you are who you’ve always been and this changes nothing.”

“You did already tell me that.”

“I did?” I blinked before waving that off. “Past Me is stupid. This is Present Me. If you feel it changes things then it changes things. The important thing is that for all of us? Everyone on the island? We still care for you. Will stand with you. And give you what you need to get through this. Want to go confront your dad? We’re with you. Want to scream and fight? We’re… well, not me because I really don’t want to test my squishy body against you-“ Chichi smiled at that, “then Goku or Krillin or Yamcha or anyone else will. You just want to sit here and cry? We’ll get you tissues.”

“…I don’t want to talk to my dad. Not right now.” She shook her head. “My mother died when I was very young. I vaguely remember her… snippets of her. But I heard so much about her… I based my entire life around those stories. That a good wife and mother acted just as she did. But now…”

I winced at that. “Chihci… I mean this with the most kindness in the world… that wasn’t healthy even when you thought she was a human.” She snapped her head up to glare at me and I threw my hands up. “Listen… okay, so I read this story once about an orphan boy who eventually gets the powers of a god. And at one point his wife is talking to another god who has been watching this boy, now a man and a god, for years. And his wife complained that his love was smothering. That he gave her his entire focus and she felt like she could NEVER match that love which is why she cheated on him.

“And the elder god tells her, and everyone else gathered, that when the boy had still been a boy he didn’t have a mother and a father. He raised himself. And as such his ideas when it came to love were based on what he saw. He would watch this one couple that would seemingly dance the day away, focused on each other, and he based his ideas on what love was around that. Love was total commitment to the other person. And because he had the power to do so he did just that. He didn’t see the fights. He didn’t see the two taking time for themselves. He didn’t see that they had other interests and hobbies and all that. He just saw their intense dance and that was that.

“You said it yourself… your mother died young. She never taught you what it was like to be a wife and mother so you had to piece it together. Your father loved her so of course he would only tell you the best things… and…” I paused, tensing as I prepared to leap away in case I really angered her. Because while I had seen Chichi mad… while I knew that she had always had Saiyan blood… it was another thing to remember I was sitting across from a half Saiyan that could snap me like a toothpick. “And… he told you how he remembered her… not as she was.”

“My father-“ Chichi began and I hurriedly cut her off.

“Loved your mother! Loved her so much that he saw her as perfect! But she wasn’t Chichi! She had her faults. I’m sure the two of them had their squabbles… admit it… you hate it when you and Goku fight, don’t you?”

“…husbands and wives shouldn’t fight,” Chichi murmured. “Husbands support the family and a wife makes sure the husband does what is right. My fa-“

She stopped, realizing what she was about to say.

“You’ve already seen this year that your view on how a marriage should be didn’t work great for you and Goku… or at least isn’t as good as it is now.” Chichi’s anger faded at that. “He WANTS to be with you, doesn’t he? Before… it felt like he was there because… because he was told he had to be. Or that you were his roommate that sometimes he hugged. But now…” I shot her a level look. “The soundproofing isn’t that good.”

Chichi blushed hard at that. “We need to find you someone so I can embarrass you.”

“I like’em as tall as me and able to kick ass,” I commented dryly. “My point is that you built this view of what you should be based on a story, not reality. And now you’ve broken free of that… you can mourn the dream but don’t ignore the reality. Your mother was a person. A Saiyan, yes, but a person. Doesn’t she deserve to have her daughter learn who she truly was? Who was Ohlrara?”

She grew quiet.

“Kayos,” she finally said, “I’d like to be alone.”

“Of course.”

~MC~MC~MC~

“Gohan… what are you doing?”

The little boy, who had been digging through the rubble that was the research facility, jumped and Senza at once felt guilty for startling the child… but also a touch of annoyed that his situational awareness wasn’t strong enough to have detected him. It was the warrior in him that scoffed that Gohan hadn’t noticed him coming…

‘Though most of the Z Fighters seem to be rather bad at that,’ He thought. ‘Sensing energy? They can do that easily enough. But they don’t do well when it comes to noticing things that are low in power or are trying to hide from them. Could probably kill them all with a few low powered humans sneaking into their rooms…’

“I’m sorry, Mr. Piccolo,” Gohan said before wincing. “OH! I’m sorry. I didn’t-“

Senza though waved him off. “It doesn’t matter, Gohan,” he told him. “Sometimes I feel almost exactly like Piccolo. So it doesn’t offend me if you call me by his name.”

Gohan, clearly relieved that he hadn’t insulted the Namekian, gave a choppy bow at that. “It must be weird… being one person now.”

“It is,” Senza said with a fond little smile, patting Gohan on the shoulder. “But… also not.” The boy frowned at that, trying to figure out what he was trying to say. Which was fine because Senza was still trying to figure out what he wanted to say. “Like I told you I remember being Piccolo. I remember being Kami. And I feel what they feel and understand WHY they did what they did… but I also disagree with it.” He let out an annoyed huff. “You ever really want to do something but also didn’t want to do it?”

Gohan considered that idea for a long time. “Like… how sometimes I’ll want to not study because I’d rather play with my dad… but I know if I do then my mom will be upset because she wants me studying?”

“A bit, yes,” Piccolo said though it wasn’t entirely like that at all. It was just him simplifying it for a child. ‘I need to see a shrink,’ he thought even as, in the same moment, he scoffed at the idea of lazing about on someone’s couch talking about his feelings. Waste of time and all that…

He shook his head.

‘Why did I ever think this was a good idea?’ he thought to himself and found that none of the parts of him had a good answer for that. “But,” he said as he turned his attention back onto Gohan, “that isn’t why I came over here.”

“It isn’t?” Gohan said slowly.

“No. I came over here to find out why you are playing around in this garbage.”

Gohan winced and even with his limited understanding of children Senza knew he was doing something he wasn’t supposed to be.

“I was just… seeing if everything was okay…”

“We already got everyone’s stuff out,” Senza informed him. They had taken several hours to locate where everyone’s rooms were and pull out what they could salvage. Chiaotzu had been the best at it, using his telekinesis to yank things right out from the rubble. “So what are you really doing?”

Gohan swallowed before lifting up some wood. “UH… I needed this.”

“For… what…”

Rather than answer the little boy scampered off.

“Gohan!” he snapped, gritting his teeth as the kid hurried away from the site, still clinging to his snatched wood. ‘Damn it, what has gotten into him?!’ He gave chase and with his longer legs he should have been able to easily catch up to the boy but Gohan had darted into the forest and was slipping through the trees and the underbrush with ease. Honestly, had it been any other time, Senza would have been impressed. Gohan was flowing through the greenery without a care, easily slipping and sliding through tracks, gaining ground on him. Latching onto handholds, finding hidden little spots that would allow him to gain a yard as Senza struggled to break through… it was impressive.

If only he knew why the kid was doing it!

Finally he broke out of the jungle and saw that they were near one of the low rocky outcrops that littered the island. Nothing too tall… honestly Senza could have leapt to the top of it without using much ki. And Gohan wasn’t making his way to the top, instead rushing towards a small opening in the stone, about half a foot shorter in height than Senza.

“Mr. Senza!” Gohan said, not surprised at all that he’d been followed. In fact it was becoming clear to the Namekian that the boy hadn’t been trying to flee him but instead had been leading him to this spot. “Come here!” He waved him off and Senza slowly approached.

There, within the cave, was all the wood that Gohan had grabbed plus plenty more, though the stuff already in there was charred and blackened, making Senza pull his wrap up to cover his nose and mouth. Gohan though stayed low, not bothered at all, and smiled as he looked at the occupant.

“He likes it warm right now… according to my books he’ll need plenty of fires until his scales harden.

Senza stared at the small pale purple dragon that chirped at him.

“His name is Icarus!”

Chapter Text

We all stared down at Gohan.

Gohan stared back up at all of us.

Most of the Z fighters glowered.

Gohan shuffled uneasily.

I… blinked.

“Okay, what the hell am I missing because it’s a cute baby dragon.” I reached out and scratched Icarus under the chin, the drake (which was barely bigger than a toaster) letting out a crooning cry of delight and leaning into my touch.

Chichi shot a dark glare at me. “Kayos, be serious.”

“I am being very serious!” I exclaimed continuing to scratch Icarus. Gohan, realizing he might have an ally in me, edged closer to where I sat. “I don’t get why we are treating a dragon like it’s the end of the world.”

“Oh, it isn’t the end of the world,” Tien said gruffly. “Just a massive headache and problem.”

We were gathered on the beach near the south end of the island. Senza had gotten us when Gohan had revealed the baby dragon to him. I had been rather surprised when Bulma had refused to allow him near the facility and Chichi had flat out demanded the dragon not be brought to our temporary camp. Even Goku had oddly suggested we keep him away from our training areas, leaving the beach the only spot where we could meet. And it wasn’t even a part of the beach we normally went to!

“I swear if this is some Garlic Jr. arriving early bullshit,” I muttered before looking at the others. “Okay, for the obvious slow kid in the class someone mind explaining, in little words, what is the massive fucking deal?”

“Kayos!” Chichi snapped. “Do not make light of this.”

I blinked.

I’d cursed in front of Gohan.

And Chichi… only cared about the dragon.

“What the fuck?”

Krillin let out a huff. “You seriously don’t know? Or is this another one of those times where you do know but don’t want to admit it?”

“I seriously don’t know and take the sarcasm out of your tone, Krillin,” I demanded, having reached my end with him and his lip; I thought we’d moved past that. “It is a little baby dragon. And yes, admittedly it is going to grow up to be a rather big dragon-“

“Actually?” Bulma said, having been quiet for most of the conversation. “I looked it up and this dragon is only going to grow to reach about 8 feet.”

“Okay, even better!” I exclaimed. “Small dragon! And he obviously cares for Gohan! So what is the big deal? Are there… dragon diseases?”

“Of course not!” Yamcha said with a laugh, several of the other Z Fighters snickering at that. “Dragon diseases. That is just insane, Kayos! You taking stupid pills today?”

I narrowed my eyes before looking to the sky. “Hey King Kai? I think Yamcha would love to see some of your vacation slides?”

“What are you-“

‘Well, I’m not sure if this will work but I will try! This is when I went to the Otherworld Arlord Beach!”

“Wait, wha-“

Yamcha then fell to the ground and began to scream.

“Huh…” I said slowly, watching him writhe. “Krillin would too.”

“You bas-“ Krillin went down hard, clutching his head. “The thong… the thong!”

“Anyone else feel like insulting me?” I snarled, the others holding up their hands, anger dissipating a bit in the face of my new power. “I thought so. Now someone please explain why it is such a big deal that Gohan has a pet dragon.”

“His name is Icarus and I am helping him grow big and strong!” the boy declared.

“Dragons are a nuisance,” Chichi said, still casting nervous glances at Yamcha and Krillin as they dealt with King Kai’s slide show. “They eat a lot.”

“Like Goku,” I pointed out.

“They might appear cute and sweet but they can be quite dangerous.”

“Like Goku.”

“No, you don’t understand! It is common for them to pick fights with stronger opponents and then rush back to where ever they have made their home and eat everything in sight-“

“Like Goku!” Goku chirped happily. Chichi turned to stare at him and he shrugged. “I mean its true. Why not own up to it?”

“I’m with the mage,” Raditz declared, arms folded over his chest. “While it would have been better if the dragon was large enough to cause some serious destruction to his enemies it still works that he is a powerful creature. Or… will be.”

“Thank you!” I exclaimed, gesturing at Raditz. “For that when I figure out how to turn air into gold you are getting the first few bricks.”

Raditz raised an eyebrow at that but said nothing; maybe he had no idea what gold was or its value but he was smart enough to realize that if someone was giving you something they claimed was important it was wise not to reject it right out of hand.

“Well, I don’t like it,” Chichi said.

“Don’t like it as much as you want,” I said with a shrug. “Either the kid keeps the dragon and you know right where it is… or…”

“Or?” Chichi said slowly, dangerously.

I liked Chichi. I really did. Especially the changes she’d made in herself over the last 14 or so months. Working to better herself, to manage her temper, to loosen her grip on her family and understand she didn’t need to cling to them but rather run beside them. But… she still had her anger and her steel-strong opinions on things. And that caused her to believe that if one challenged her then the answer was to fight right back.

I liked Chichi.

But that didn’t mean I was going to give in.

Or play fair.

“Or I take the dragon,” I said with a dark smile. “Gohan will still see him all the time only now I’ll have an excuse to… experiment.” I tilted my head to the side. “I wonder if I teach Icarus magic he’ll become another Shenron.”

THAT made all the Z Fighters suddenly rather nervous.

“Raditz could teach Icarus how to fight… and Isco show him morals and values!”

The drone let out a huff at that. “Am I allowed to select my own testing subjects.”

“As long as doing so doesn’t hurt you, morally.”

“That wouldn’t be a problem, sir.”

“Fine!” Chichi declared, throwing her hands up in the air. “Gohan can keep the dangerous dragon that will probably kill us all and eat us!”

Icarus let out a happy coo and nuzzled my hand before latching onto my finger and giving it a gummy suck.

“Oh no, he’s developed a taste for humans,” I said dryly… only to feel a flare up in my other arm. I frowned, lifting my hand… and my eyes went wide as a surge of Evil Magic grew within me. “Uh… I’m sure that’s nothing at all.”

~MC~MC~MC~

“Well, it looks like you have nearly everything ready,” Bulma’s father said as he looked over the ship, cigarette dangling from his lips. “And this was Kami’s old ship?”

“Yes and no,” Bulma informed him. When he raised an eyebrow at that she said, “What I mean is that I used Kami’s old ship but I took it completely apart. Would have been far too small for all of us that are going. But I used every piece…”

“Ah, the old Ship of Theseus question,” Dr. Brief said, rubbing his chin. “When did it stop being Kami’s ship if every piece was used to make THIS ship.”

“Exactly!” Bulma said, glancing over at Raditz who was deep in the control panel of the ship, muttering about the wiring and how Nameks were ‘shit when it came to guidance systems’. Kami’s Ship had run more on magic than anything else, being almost grown from what Kayos and Baba could determine, but Bulma didn’t trust anything that didn’t have backups and as such had recruited Raditz to assist in getting everything up to snuff. The Saiyan had repaired his own pod MANY times and even brought it over to Capsule Corps so they could study its layout and systems.

The ship, which Bulma was still debating the name of, was rather large compared to what it had started as. Kami’s ship had been roughly the size of a small apartment. The new ship was the size of an entire complex. Raditz had told her that it was nearly the size of a Frieza Force Saucer, whatever that was. While it did have rooms for everyone they were rather small but that was fine, as everyone had stated they didn’t need much space. Just a place to sleep would work for them. She had been debating making a place for them to train, knowing how Goku was, but Raditz had informed her that there were ‘Battle Trances’ that he could teach them all that would allow them to master their skills in their minds without needing to actually move. She just needed a room that was reinforced to deal with the Ki that they would be naturally generating that might cause the ship some issues.

“Have you decided who will be going with you, sweetie?”

Bulma sighed at that. “Kayos and Senza are figuring it out but it sounds like it might be everyone. They went off with Mr. Popo to try and learn everything they can about Namek… Senza believes there might be some records he left behind during his youth hidden away… he had dreams of Namek, though he didn’t know what they were.”

Dr. Brief shook his head at that. “I simply can’t understand it. How does one send off a child like that, all alone?”

“Senza wonders about that too. Why his family sent him off? He doesn’t know what his parents were thinking… if he even has parents.”

Raditz let out a huff at that.

“Oh?” Bulma said, turning towards him with a raised eyebrow and folding her arms over her chest. “Do you have something to add?” She could hear the mockery that was about to come. How parents made you weak. How it was stupid to care about them. How-

“If they abandoned him then he shouldn’t care,” Raditz said, barely glancing at her before going back to the wiring. “Bad parents aren’t worth the time.”

‘Okay… not quite what I expected,’ Bulma mentally admitted before finding herself saying aloud, “So what about your parents then?”

“They were shit,” Raditz admitted. “But that was also the culture we grew up in. Child were tossed into the wild quick and expected to just… live. If you didn’t then you died. Plain and simple.” He gave a shrug. “They were better than most. My mother actually saw me off before I joined my first raiding party and my father helped me forge my first armor… most Saiyans have to do all that on their own, without any help from their parents.” He shook his head. “Stupid. All of them.”

That caused Dr. Brief to speak up. “You believe it better if a parent helps their child?”

“Of course,” Raditz said as he began to work on getting two wires connected together. He reached for a small knife and set about cutting off the protective cover on each of them.

Bulma blinked.

“Surprised?” Raditz asked. “I’ve had a lot of time to think about it. Going from planet to planet, razing them to the ground… its bursts of action followed by utter tedium as you wait for the next assignment. And that gives you plenty of time to think. Vegeta used to come to me early on and talk about how there were so many things he would have done different if he had been allowed to became King Vegeta, Lord and Master of All Saiyans. What he would change. What he would bring back. What he would he would keep but still find a way to put his thumbprint on. At first I thought it was stupid… just a way to torture himself. Think about things that would never come to be.

“But as the years began to stretch on and I found myself with nothing to do during the months I spent in space, waiting to arrive on a new planet, I began to think about it too. What I would have changed. What I would have done different. Not as a king… Vegeta would have had my head if I ever slipped up like that. But I thought about what I would have done if I had… I don’t know… been able to actually change how the Saiyans were.” He waved his hand about dismissively.

Bulma wasn’t surprised when her father walked over to Raditz, already reaching and getting him the electrical tape he’d need. Raditz glanced at the man and after a moment gave a sharp nod; for the Saiyan Warrior that was like a pleading thanks.

“And what would you have done?” Dr. Brief asked.

Raditiz let out a huff once more; Bulma got the sense that was his go-to sound when he needed to think of some way to say something and wanted to buy a bit of time.

“For one get us to stop being so pig headed and thinking we have to go it alone.” He shook his head. “Kayos… when he talked about my armor… he was right. I still think that Kakarot should have been able to defeat me on his own but I’m willing to try my brother’s way. Because the mage is right… we aren’t ever alone. Except the Saiyans think they can do everything and actively try to push all others away. That’s why Vegeta was stupid enough to kill Nappa. Though that wasn’t a great loss.” She could hear the slight amusement in his tone. “But if I could snap my fingers and change the Saiyan Race I would have made them actually try harder to work together. There were plenty who did in the lower levels of society… had to in order to survive… but as they rose up they became convinced that they could do all on their own. Or that others should be able to do all on their own.

“We had teachers, yes… but much of how I learned to fight came from figuring it out on my own. No one corrected my mistakes they just let me get injured and then mocked me for the mistakes. ‘It should be have been obvious!’ they’d declare even though I’d never fought three people at once who used slug slingers and had holes punched in my arms and legs. They claimed it was ensuring the strong survived… but it also made sure that we lost so much.” He shook his head, words turning bitter. “How much did we lose because a father didn’t teach their son their secrets?”

“That’s why Goku is teaching Gohan,” Bulma said softly.

Raditz nodded, not looking at her yet it clear from his body language that he was focused on her. “Yeah… I’m hoping he and Chichi let me show the brat a few things.” Bulma didn’t bristle at him calling Gohan a ‘brat’ as there was just enough mock annoyance in his tone to make it clear to her that he was being playful. It reminded her of Piccolo and how he had talked about people; being dismissive but at the same time clearly caring. “He’s going to be better than all of us… have a leg up.”

He pushed himself out from under the console.

“Or, at least, that’s what I think.”

“And it’s a smart way to think,” Dr. Brief stated. Raditz merely looked away, gave a final huff, and walked out of the ship. Bulma didn’t bother to ask WHAT he was off doing; sometimes people needed their privacy. “So interesting how people can have far more depth than we ever might have considered.”

Bulma found herself nodding. ‘I spent so long thinking Raditz was just some horrible brute that had come to destroy everything on Earth. But there is more to him than that… just like my friends. Goku isn’t just some happy idiot that loves to fight. Chichi isn’t just the housewife. Kayos isn’t just the Ki-less wimp.’

“Speaking of families… how is Goku handling his brother?”

Bulma couldn’t help but smile fondly at that. “Surprisingly well. It was shocking for him to realize he has a brother but he’s eager to hear about his family. His mother and his father… Raditz knows nothing of their grandparents as apparently they both died before he was born or at least that’s what Vegeta told him…” She trailed off. “Of course we can’t be for sure if Vegeta was lying or not. Can’t trust a thing he says, honestly.” She shook her head, banishing the thought. “But the point is that Goku has been excited to learn about his family. But… not upset either, which is good. He never knew them and while I get the sense he would love to have known them he wouldn’t trade Grandpa Gohan for the world.”

“That’s good… that’s very good.” Dr. Brief fell silent.

“Dad… you know I need to go with them, right?” Bulma let out a soft sigh. “I know its going to be dangerous but the ship-“

“Isco might be the only one I trust to repair it and he is likely to jettison everyone but himself just to make better time,” her father said, only half joking.

“Yeah.”

“Doesn’t mean I won’t worry about you, sweetie. You are going to another planet…”

“I’ll be fine, I swear.” She pressed her lips together in thought. “Though I do need to take some time and work on new Power Armor… I can’t bring my original set, that is too big to get on the ship. But something smaller? More streamlined?”

“Unless you put it in a capsule.”

At once Bulma slapped her head. “Of course! Why didn’t I think of that?”

“That doesn’t matter,” her father assured her. “What does is that I’m here to remind you.” He rose up and motioned for Bulma to follow him; the young woman didn’t even hesitate. “Now then, I have been thinking about your armor and I think we need to look at variety. If we use the capsule technology we could build them directly into the arms and legs of the arm that would allow you to easily switch to a different payload if you run into trouble. Different weapons.”

“Not just types of ammo, either,” Bulma said. “Swords. Chainsaws. Drills. Guns for long distance attacks and ones for short range. Powerful blasts and more concentrated bursts.”

“Very good!” her father declared. “It would also be smart to have some things that are very low tech… sometimes we forget that while its nice to be advanced and flashy its also good to have a firm foot on the standards.”

“Yeah, you’re right,” Bulma admitted. “Master Roshi is… was…” She winced at the reminder that the old man was gone. As much as he was a disgusting pervert… he had still been one of them. ‘And he will be again once we get to Namek,’ she thought before revising herself again. “Master Roshi is always warning Goku and the rest of the fighters that battles might be won with a showy Ki blast… but they are always lost by shoddy footwork or lazy punches. Same is true for me.”

Her father nodded at that. “Now, I am thinking that we should look into multiple sets of full armor, just in case one gets damaged. And I have a few ideas of making it quicker to get it on…”

~MC~MC~MC~

“This feels like a joke,” I muttered as I held open the door of the dojo. While the others were dressed normal I had gone with a suit (Bulma paying for it) to help better present the image I wanted to world to see. “A mage, an alien, a robot, and a d’jinn walk into a bar.”

“We aren’t entering a bar though,” Senza said. I stared at him for several long moments and at once his face fell. “Ah… you were being clever.”

“Not that clever, I admit,” I said.

“Oh good, I don’t have to say it,” Mr. Popo said.

It was… honestly surprising how well I got along with Mr. Popo. Maybe it was thanks to the internet but I had been a touch leery meeting up with Kami’s attendant. While it had started as a joke the fact still remained that he had been able to fight Goten and Trunks without really breaking a sweat. Mr. Popo WAS powerful… and more importantly he was raw magic. I was still learning how to master my powers and there was Mr. Popo, born from magic itself as far as I could tell.

And yet for all my worries the two of us got along rather well. Mr. Popo was polite but did know how to tease and the two of us fell into an easy repoire.

“Are you sure about this, Kayos?” Mr. Popo asked as we walked through the gym, not paying attention to the stares we were getting from those that were working out. Honestly it was strange to realize that I had already reached a level in my training where the fighters and warriors around me were… nothing.

‘I could destroy them all with a wave of my hand,’ I suddenly thought. ‘Wouldn’t even need to use one of my named spells… just a magical blast would kill them.’ It was a heady thing to realize that all the muscle heads that were currently punching sandbags and pumping iron were little more than insects I could crush. ‘Swap their blood with the sand in those punching bags, so that their heart locks up as their blood drips from the bags. Turn the very air in their lungs into iron so that they can’t even take a breath. Twist them inside out or make their muscles blow up like balloons until their arms and legs explode…’

I shook my head. The recent increase in evil magic had begun to affect me and until I stabilized I needed to keep people around me that would make sure I didn’t do anything mad.

“We could kill them all, sir,” Isco informed me. “Slaughter them and bury their bodies in the rubble before turning this patch of land into a park dedicated to my greatness. I would, naturally, allow you to have a statue of your own…”

…surround myself with people that were already evil and insane so I would feel the need to go the opposite route from them.

“Mr. Kayos?” Mr. Popo said, making me realize I hadn’t answered him.

“Sorry. And yeah, I am. While the earth should be fine while we’re gone I’d feel better if we had a back up plan, just in case. Dr. Brief can make weapons, sure, but he’s too peaceful to use them.”

“Tien is reaching out to Launch, asking her to come and assist,” Senza pointed out.

“And that is good too. But we need another heavy hitter and this guy is the next strongest fighter in the world if we eliminate the Z Fighters.”

“You want me to eliminate them, sir?” Isco asked, holding up a hand and converting it into a gun.

Sometimes I wished I could tell if he was joking or not.

“Plus it might solve some problems if we meet with him now,” I said. “Get rid of some misunderstandings.” I smiled as I walked up to a private training room and without a second thought opened the door and stepped inside.

“Hey!” the familiar gruff voice called out. Not because of any anger but rather just a growling rough voice that was well suited for the fighter the man was… but not the good person. “Can’t ya read the sign? This is a private training area!”

“I did but I think someone like you, who understands the importance of a good deal, will want to talk to us.” I said with a smile. “I’m Avo Kayos. This is my partner, Isco-“ The droid had been… oddly pleased… when I’d told him that I wanted to begin introducing him as my equal partner so people didn’t think he was just a robot that had to obey me, “-and my friends Senza and Mr. Popo. And I’d like to talk with you about a proposition... Mr. Satan.”

~MC~MC~MC~

“Hey Tien,” Launch said with a cocky little smirk as she descended down the ramp of the Capsule Corp private flight car that had been sent to pick her up. “And Chiaotzu. How are you two doing?” She looked over at Krillin, who raised an eyebrow in surprise. “Long time no see.”

“Hi Launch!” Chiaotzu said with a huge grin. “You look really nice! I like your hair!”

“Aw, aren’t you sweet.” She reached up and ran her fingers through her locks, which were streaked with blue and yellow to the point that it was hard to tell which was the dominate color.

Krillin though kept staring at Launch in confusion. “Uh…”

When he’d been told that Launch would be flying in to work with Baba and the Mr. Satan guy that Kayos was recruiting in order to protect the Earth while they were gone he hadn’t known what to think. On one hand when Launch was in her ‘badass evil mode’, as Yamcha had labeled it, she was a decent enough fighter and did love to pack plenty of guns to even up any fight. But she was also, well, evil. There was a good chance that she would side with whatever monster or despot came to try and take over the planet until they insulted her and then she would try and kill them. Her other self was kind and nice and sweet but far too gentle to fight.

He had naturally been worried it would be a disaster.

But Launch now?

“Heh,” Launch snickered. “You never told him?” Tien shook his head and Launch punched Tien in the shoulder. “Jackass. And here I thought I was the bitch.”

“Uh… what?” Krillin said.

Launch turned to face him. “A few months back Tien reached out to me and said a friend of yours had a solution for my… little problem.” She shrugged. “Something about a Scroll of Info?”

“Scroll of Knowledge,” Tien corrected her.

“Thanks,” Launch said with a smile before looking back at Krillin once more. “So this Scroll said that if I went on this vision quest I could finally blend my two personalities together and get rid of my little condition that swapped between them.” She gestured at her hair. “Completely worked.”

“Oh… OH!” Krillin exclaimed, eyes going wide. “So then-“

“Evil Launch without the thirst for bloodshed, Good Launch with a spine,” Launch said with a self-deprecating smirk. “The best of both worlds. Maybe not as fun as when I’m all big and bad but now I’m not angry all the time and actually think about my actions. Plenty of ways to get my adrenaline kicks without breaking the law.” She shrugged and the four of them moved towards the airport’s main terminal to get to the ride that Bulma had arranged for them. “I… I am sorry about Master Roshi.”

“We’ll be getting him back,” Tien assured her.

“I wanted to see him, you know?” Her voice grew softer. “I wanted him to see the progress I had made. The person I’ve become.”

‘I can see it just fine.’

All four stopped short.

“UH… you heard that, right?” Launch said, looking about. “And I swear if this is a fucking prank…”

‘Nah, no prank!’ Master Roshi declared in their heads. ‘King Kai lets me snoop.’

‘Only to keep you quiet about what we did last night!’ King Kai called out.

“Who is that?” Launch said, brow furrowing.

“King Kai. He taught Yamcha and I thought he was training with Master Roshi,” Tien stated, eyes narrowed. “But I guess they’ve been up to some other things.”

‘Oh, we have been doing plenty of things. For example-‘

‘NO!’ King Kai shouted, making everyone listening in wince. ‘Do NOT tell them about that! I am letting you contact them, that was the deal!’

‘Fine fine, hold your horses.’ For some reason that made King Kai stammer. ‘Now then, don’t go worryin’ ‘bout me. I trust Tien and the rest of the group ta bring me back! You just worry ‘bout protectin’ the earth! And I know you can do it so don’t go worryin’ ‘bout yourself either!’

Launch managed a smile at that. “Crazy old man,” she said with utter fondness.

Tien felt the moment Master Roshi and King Kai disappeared from their minds. He looked over at Launch who wasn’t even trying to hide her awe.

“I know these things are normal for you guys but… but that will never become normal for me.”

“That’s okay,” Tien said, “it will never be normal for me either.”

~MC~MC~MC~

Mr. Satan watched the footage intently.

That was the first victory we’d managed to get… to get him to let us show him the fight between all of us and the Saiyans.

I’d had Isco carefully cut things together so he wouldn’t be able to instantly claim it was just a bunch of frauds using special effects to make it appear like we were throwing out laser beams and the like. I vaguely remembered that, thanks to an incident in his youth, Mr. Satan had come to see all Ki users as frauds. So it was important to get him to see this as a legit request and not a bunch of hucksters trying to make a quick buck.

‘And the irony that so many in the DBZ fandom see Mr. Satan as a fraud…’ I thought to myself, as he finally finished watching the footage and slid the tablet over to me.

“Well… some of the stances weren’t that great but I can tell ya got some decent fighters,” Mr. Satan said. He looked towards Senza. “You’re… I’m gonna guess brother?” Senza didn’t say a word… how did one describe in family terms a being that was now a part of you but was actually the reincarnation of what you saw as your darkness? “He was rather good. Definitely would give me a run for my money!” He let out a laugh at that.

“Yes…” Senza said, some of Piccolo shining through as he glanced in my direction.

“Ya lookin’ ta recruit me then?” Mr. Satan asked.

“Yes and no,” I said. “We do want to recruit you but not for the team we currently have. You see, we have learned of an issue that is going to be taking many of us halfway around the world for several months. We are recruiting a team of skilled fighters who can watch over Japan and make sure that it is protected while we are gone.”

Mr. Satan nodded at that. “Guess that makes sense… and while I get why ya’d come ta me-“ he beamed at that before continuing, “-I am wonderin’ how ya learned about me?”

“Capsule Corp makes sure to learn of all up and coming fighters,” Isco stated.

“Hmmm… maybe. But I don’t like ya workin’ with them fellas like this guy’s brother or the orange wearin’ guy. They use far too much trickery rather than martial arts!”

I hadn’t expected that to be a sticking point but quickly countered, “People grow up and change. We’ve worked with them and I assure you that the fundamentals are now their goal.”

Mr. Satan nodded at that. “Suppose you’re right. And I know that Capsule Corp is a legit company and wouldn’t be fooled by tricky trickers like them.” We both shared a smile though for vastly different reasons. “Alright… so you want me to keep watch on things?”

“Along with a few other people. Your main partner will be Launch… I’ll send over her info once you agree. But I suppose we should get into payment and perks.” I brought up another file on the tablet. “Right now you would be given a flat fee per month for watching over Japan.” I slid it over and saw Mr. Satan’s eyes go wide at that. I knew it was quite a bit but apparently my conversation of Zeni from American Dollar was a bit off as Mr. Satan was practically drooling over the tablet.

“Right now… so ya mean there might be more?”

I nodded, deciding it was time to truly lock things in and fuck over canon. “Many of the fighters we represent aren’t looking for the fame that comes from defeating threats such as these. We have been trying to keep things quiet but the way the world is that just won’t last. As such, if you agree and prove yourself capable, we would be interested in making you the face of the Capsule Corp Z Fighter Program. You would talk with the press, do engagements, so on.” I paused. “You would also be able to still compete in tournaments and gain other sponsorship deals, so long as both met the Ethics Clauses in your contract.”

“Makes sense…” Mr. Satan said and I was struck by the fact that for all his bluster… Mr. Satan was a sharp businessman. He wasn’t just signing on the dotted line; he was reading through the contract, making sure everything was legit, and considering just what we were offering. “How much time do I have ta consider?”

“Sooner would be preferred but you have about a week,” Isco said.

“Right, right.”

I decided to go for the killing blow. “Mr. Satan… Capsule Corp is willing to give this to you, free of charge, no strings attached, as a show of good faith.” I pulled out a small vile.

“What’s that?” Mr. Satan said, frowning as he leaned forward. “Two beans?”

He had no idea how right he was about one of them.

“This, Mr. Satan, is the cure for your wife’s heart condition.”

I saw as the ramifications of what I’d just told him slowly dawn on him.

I had been startled when Isco had informed me that Mr. Satan’s wife was still alive. I had been under the impression she had died shortly after Videl was born but then again the manga and anime had never really talked about her. So when he’d looked into Mr. Satan and found his wife was alive but fighting a horrific heart condition, similar to the Heart Virus that would have killed Goku in Future Trunks’ timeline, I knew we had to do something.

I knew what it was like to have a mother stolen away.

Dr. Brief and Chichi had helped me with the secondary pill, the one that would fight the virus. While in the timeline Bulma had been the one to create the medicine Dr. Brief had been interested in the challenge and Chichi had assisted in what she’d learned about healing. The Senzu Bean would get her back on her feet after the Heart Cure did its work.

“You… you…”

“No strings attached. Nothing needed. It’s the right thing to do.” I handed him the Senzu bean. “Give her this and she will be cured. The blue pill first then the green pill 1 day later.”

“I…”

I smiled. “Just look over the contract.”

“Think he’ll sign?” Mr. Popo asked as we left.

“He’d have signed now if he could prove I was right,” I stated. “NEVER underestimate the power of love.”

~Nine Days Later…~

Goku chuckled as he looked Krillin over. “Hey, you going on vacation or something?” His best friend was wearing a jacket, a baseball cap, and had a camera slung around his neck. He also had a duffle back with him which was a touch better than Chichi who had wanted to bring three suitcases each for all of them. Which Goku thought was silly because 1) he usually only wore a few Gis anyway, why did he need so many clothes and 2) he didn’t have a second reason the first reason was good enough!

“Well, none of us have been to an alien planet before so I want to make sure I document it!”

“Technically,” Kayos called out, “Goku is currently ON an alien planet for him.”

That caused Goku to laugh, tail swishing back and forth. “Huh, that’s right! I never thought of it like that!”

Raditz huffed as he walked by with a small rump sack. It had taken a few days but he’d finally agreed to try out a GI. Of course he’d flat out refused to go with orange so he was now wearing a black Gi with white trim which, Goku had to admit, looked rather good on him.

“Only bring what is absolutely necessary… that way if you have to leave it behind you aren’t regretting it.”

“I’m good then,” Kayos said as he walked up with… nothing.

“Really?” Krillin asked with a raised eyebrow.

“Really really.”

“That’s a nice coat, Kayos!” Goku said. Kayos was wearing his normal jeans and plaid button up shirt but had swapped out his sneakers for hiking boots and had on a long gray jacket.

“Thanks… gift from Baba. That I had to pay for so not really sure it counts as a gift…” he shrugged at that. “Point is that it has all sorts of secrets and goodies to get me through this trip. Ton of pockets.” Goku tilted his head, deciding that it really wasn’t worth asking what he was getting at as if it were something important than Kayos would explain it. “So… everyone ready?”

“You are the last to arrive,” he said.

The mage sighed, jerking his thumb towards Isco… both versions of him. “He’s sulking.”

“I still believe it would be best for me to remain on Earth!”

“Isco, you are coming!” Kayos called out.

“You don’t trust me!”

“…no, I don’t! You’ll take over the planet in a week!”

The droid considered that. “I suppose that might be the nicest thing you’ve ever said to me.”

Kayos sighed and wiggled his fingers as he moved his hand in the air and suddenly both iscos were dragged towards him. “We don’t know the range of your connection either so you need to come with us.”

“This is entirely unfair!” Isco whined. Which Goku found very amusing as it was in stereo.

“Well… I think we’re ready,” Goku said as he looked at Krillin, placing a hand on his shoulder. “Ready to get Master Roshi back?”

“Born ready.”

Goku nodded, the very last one to climb the ramp (once Kayos shoved Isco aboard). Tien, Yamacha, Chiaotzu, Chichi, Gohan, Senza, Krillin, Kayos, Isco, and Bulma were all inside, leaving him the last.

‘Don’t worry Earth… we’ll all be back. And we’ll bring Master Roshi home.’

He stared out one final time before boarding.

And within 10 minutes, for the second time in his life, Goku found himself rocketing away from the only planet he had ever called home.

Chapter Text

"...and honestly after that I switched back to ketchup."

Most of the Z Fighters burst into laughter at the punch line, snickering and giggling at the joke. Senza and Raditz didn't but Gohan was quick to explain why it was funny while I didn't but I had a feeling it was just a matter of English vs. Japanese. Even though, apparently, I had been speaking Japanese the entire time I'd been in the world of Dragon Ball Z. Even Isco was chuckling but I think that had more to do with him downloading his own movie to watch in his head or cackling over how he could use the slapstick comedy to destroy all of humanity.

We were only a week into our flight to Namek and ha all decided that we could use a night to just relax; now that we knew the ship could handle the super fast travel (Bulma had been VERY clear that it wasn't "light speed") needed to get there before we were all reduced to gray haired fuddy-duddies we could actually settle into routines and not constantly glance at the warning alarms waiting for them to go off.

It had been Yamcha who had suggested doing the movie night, arguing that he hadn't gotten to do them what with him being, well, dead. The rest of us had done them once a week back on the island as a way to unwind after a day of training.

"Want to try out that new Kung Fu movie?" Krillin asked. Bulma had made sure to get downloads of hundreds of movies so we had a vast selection, new and old.

"I don't know," Chichi said, glancing at Raditz who had already begun to snicker, "I don't want anyone to hurt themselves laughing." The Z Fighters had found the movies hysterical, pointing out all the mistakes the "fighters" were making in them. We'd watched one with Raditz before our launch and he'd nearly pulled a disc laughing at some of the moves the so called "great warriors" had used to defeat the bad guys. That had led him to describe how he could defeat such a hero... and the others had joined in.

'Nothing is scarier than Goku explaining how he could crush a resistance with a smile on his face,' I thought to myself as I stood up.

"Kayos, you okay?" Bulma asked.

"I just need to stretch my legs," I assured her, forcing myself to smile. "Go ahead and start without me." I made my way out of the room, waving off their words of concerns, and ambled my way to the front of the ship. The windshield (which wasn't a windshield at all but I didn't really understand any of it when Bulma explained how it worked) gave me the perfect view of space blasting by us; the stars distant points that suddenly blurred and elongated as we blasted past them, creating a beautiful dance of light. It was... breath taking, honestly, and no matter what happened next I was glad to have gotten to see it.

"You okay?" Goku asked, coming up to me and placing a hand on my shoulder; honestly I wasn't surprised that of all of the Z Fighters he was the one to follow me. For as much as people played him off as some fool Goku was rather perspective of people and their emotions.

"Just thinking," I said softly. Goku didn't press me, allowing me time to gather my thoughts. "I'm thinking about the Dragon Balls. And... and wishing people back."

"Oh?"

"There are people I've lost that I wish I could use the Dragon Balls on to bring back," I said. "And not just them but others. People I've never even met. People who were brilliant and creative and brought not just me but so many others such joy with their stories and tales. Its... its sad to think they won't tell us any more adventures. And sure, sometimes I disagreed with how they told the story but.,.. what I wouldn't give for even a single new tale. Just one." I let out a melancholy sigh. "But... that isn't going to happen."

Goku considered my words.

"You know," he finally said, "I don't think anyone is ever truly gone." He squeezed my shoulder. "I miss Grandpa Gohan every day. He used to tell the greatest bedtime stories. Did the voices and everything! I was the only one that got to hear them. And then he was gone and... no more bedtime stories." He took a breath and I turned to see he was smiling. "But now when Gohan needs a story before bed... I tell him one of Grnadpa Gohan's. I used to try and do it JUST like he did but I realized that I can't do that. Because I'm not him. But I can make the stories my own. Do the voices my way. Maybe change up a fight or two or make a villain a bit nicer. Make them my own. But its not taking away what Grandpa Gohan did... its adding to it.

"I don't think anyone is ever truly gone. They remain with us when we pass on what they taught us. And when we add to it? Well... that just makes it like they are still with us."

I smiled at that.

"You... are a wise man Goku. A very wise man."

~MC~MC~MC~

"I'm flying by the seat of my pants, never creating with a thought to what's up ahead!"

In Memory of

Akira Toriyama

Chapter Text

He was supposed to be heading to Namek.

After his minions had managed to FINALLY find a Namekian… a weak, whimpering, cringing little thing that mewled in pain simply because the cell they’d tossed him in was ‘too cold’… one hadn’t gone about destroying himself just in the name of honor and freedom and all that garbage, he had thought that the secrets of the warrior race were finally his.

‘Just as my father discovered those filthy monkeys I would have at last discovered the homeworld of the Namekians… and destroyed it utterly and completely.’ Because that was his father’s mistake, one he had quickly rectified: you don’t leave an entire planet that could rebel just sitting there for decades under your rule, ready to rise up and cause problems.

He floated through the halls of his flagship in his special mobile throne, the way in front of him and behind completely empty, just as he liked. While there was something to say of having the weaklings bow to him, heads down and knees bent in subjection, he always preferred being utterly by himself. There was nothing better than standing on a planet that had not a scrap of life, knowing he was the sole thing with a heartbeat on that rock. Then, and only then, did he truly find himself happy. The worship of the enslaved and broken? Fine enough but… not as pleasing as that.

And Lord Frieza, Emperor of the Universe, always so enjoyed getting what he wanted.

Which was why he was in a foul mood as he zipped through the halls of his landing space ship, mentally asking for some pathetic fool to get in his way and allow him to work off some of his anger by reducing them to space dust. Zarbon and Dodoria had, much to his surprise, actually wised up and given him a wide berth when the command had come down for them to land. So too had his minions, apparently. Normally he’d be pleased with them actually showing some sense but not at the moment.

Now he wanted not merely emptiness… but to be the cause of that emptiness. The reason the halls were filled with only himself.

‘Perhaps the planet as well,’ he thought bitterly as he came to the exit ramp and pressed a button on his mobile throne, the door opening with a cracking hiss and slowly lowering down. The world he’d been forced to land on was a dusty place, with rolling sand dunes and great stone uprisings that darted up into the sky. ‘Though it looks already have wiped out already,’ he thought , eyes narrowed before he began to float out of the ship, activating the transponder that would tell him exactly where to go. On the small screen embedded in his throne’s control panel he saw the dotted line that led to his destination and made for it… even as he wished to simply turn around, get back to his ship, and fly off towards Namek.

Namek.

Ever since that whining Namekian had been brought to him his mind had been utterly focused on it. He had sent out the commands for all but his private ship to avoid that sector of space, not wanting anyone else to land on the planet. Especially not after what he had learned-

He grimaced. He was becoming distracted and he desperately needed to keep his mind on what he was being forced to deal with NOW.

‘I would have been to Namek already if not for this distraction,’ he thought angrily as he continued on. ‘This waste of time! But instead I needed to turn around and travel nearly half a galactic month’s time to this pathetic dust ball! It would serve them right if I just told them that I had only come to spit in their faces and tell them how useless this all was before returning to my ship and seeing just how hard I could push the engines to get us back on schedule!’

But he didn’t.

He didn’t dare.

Because, and he utterly hated it, the fact remained that when this call came out he had no choice but to answer.

He reached a large plateau and without even stopping he sent his mobile throne racing straight up, rising higher and higher until he crested…

“Ah, Frieza. Finally arrived I see. Perhaps not quite fashionably late but close enough?”

“Father,” Frieza said simply.

The top of the plateau had been set up to resemble a cheerful little café. There was a massive table with an umbrella sticking out of the middle, providing shade, while beside the hulking form of his father several servants moved great palm fronds back and forth to create a gentle breeze. The Cold Elites were dressed in their finest armor as they played classical instruments, filling the air with their music. His father’s chair was almost painfully boring and pathetic, thanks to him clearly wanting to make it fit with the décor. Only its massive size really made it stand out. Upon the table were cups and saucers and a few exotic pastries from planets that had earned his father’s favor.

“No greeting for me, little brother?” Cooler said from their father’s right. Of course he would have selected that seat and Frieza cursed mentally that he hadn’t shown up first to snag it just to be able to throw it in his brother’s face. It didn’t matter that he had lingered because of his own choices… he still should have gotten there before his annoying older brother.

“Oh, I didn’t even see you there,” Frieza said dismissively as he narrowed his eyes slightly, smiling as if he had just noticed something slightly odd but not terribly memorable.

Cooler opened his mouth to say something only for their father to cut in. “Frieza, please leave your hover pod and come sit with us.”

“It is a mobile throne,” Frieza muttered under his breath even as he floated out of the MOBILE THRONE.

“Come now, brother,” Cooler said snidely, “the ground won’t hurt you… unless the pads of your feet have become so soft from lounging about that a single step would be like a knife.”

“I do not ‘lounge around’. Unlike you I simply don’t see the need to waste useless energy on meaningless things.” He walked over to the table and took a seat and one of the Cold Elites hurried over and poured his father a cup of Orgunian Tea, based on the scent of it. Not his favorite but decent enough. His father’s favorite, naturally… because of course it would always be his father’s favorite.

“Are you saying that visiting with our father is meaningless?” Cooler said with a sad shake of his head and Frieza grit his teeth at that, hating how he’d walked into that trap. “The moment I received his summons I hurried right here. And despite being farther off than you I managed to make it here first. I wonder if you truly do care for him if you see spending time with him as a burden.” He chuckled at that and turned to look at their father, only to be rather disappointed that King Cold had his eyes shut, savoring his tea.

“I do care for him,” Frieza lied. “Which is why I worry about maintaining all he built rather than flittering about the universe letting what he gave me turn to ruins.”

Cooler snapped his head towards Frieza and the younger of King Cold’s children smirked in getting that reaction.

“Oh, is something the matter?” Frieza said, as if they both didn’t know that Cooler was still smarting over the loss of The F Ridge Station.

When King Cold had decided to ‘retire’ he had made a grand show of presenting Frieza to all the many different planetary rulers who served under him, informing them that the Cold Force was now the Frieza Force. But what his father had failed to mention to all of them was that his empire was quite larger than any expected. It had been a game for him, creating multiple empires with him at the head, and then seeing what would happen if they brushed up against one another. What feuds would happen, what battles. King Cold once had gotten three calls in a row about the same battle, just from the different sides that had taken part.

So when he had decided to ‘retire’ he had given Frieza an empire… and Cooler as well. Frieza wasn’t entirely convinced there weren’t other parts of the empire out there, awarded to loyal minions or, much to his own disgust and horror, other brothers of his that he hadn’t been told of. Honestly he could see his father playing such a game, having a secret family that none of them knew about just to see what would happened.

Frieza had what was now known as the Frieza Force and had quickly set about shaping it to how he desired. Cooler, for his part, had decided that rather than continue on with the family business of mass cleansing planets and then selling them off to the highest bidder (sometimes to the survivors… that was always delightful) he wished to… experiment. The F Ridge Station was to be the premiere research facility in the entire universe. It would allow the Cooler Force to become dominant not just in raw power but through advancements. The newest scouters and blasters, upgrading their ships to make them far faster and more fuel efficient, cybernetic enhancements so that a single soldier could take down a solar system; all of these were the dreams of Cooler. An attempt to prove that he could be as refined and cultured as his father. He had mocked Frieza more than once that for all the time he spent trying appear to be a dignified and cultured ruler he was little more than a barbarian king sending out his horde to slaughter.

And then the F Ridge Station had exploded, taking out 95% of the Cooler Force.

‘The only thing that would have made it better would have been if I had been the cause of it,’ Frieza thought to himself. ‘Though I suppose there is a delight to be had in my brother’s failure coming from his own inferiority.’

After the destruction of The F Ridge Station Cooler had been reduced to being the very Barbarian King he had accused Frieza of. Traveling with the last dregs of the Cooler Force he too had begun conquering planets and selling them off, all in the name of trying to regain some of the lost wealth that had been destroyed in the explosion that had taken the research facility.

“Boys, please,” King Cold said, selecting a pastry from a plate, “I don’t see why this must devolve into the same sniping that it always does. You know I don’t want that.”

‘Liar,’ Frieza thought bitterly. While he was currently doing far better than Cooler when it came to earning their father’s approval he knew that he didn’t truly have it. At any moment his father might decide to show honor to Cooler and judge Frieza as a failure. ‘Everything in your existence is about pitting beings against one another.’

“Very well, father,” Cooler said, always the little suck up. He was still bruising that Frieza was far more successful than him when it came to, well, everything, and thus did everything he could to try and earn their father’s respect. Always agreeing with him, always quick to say ‘yes father’ or ‘of course father’ or ‘whatever you wish, father’.

‘That is why you will never be a proper ruler, brother. You have no spine. No drive to stand on your own.’ Frieza held out his tea cup, allowing a servant to pour.

Only for his father to wave the servant off.

“No, I don’t think there is any need for that,” his father said to the now trembling and rather fearful Cold Elite. It should have delighted Frieza that he made the simpleton feel such fear but in reality all it did was make him grit his teeth in frustration that while he could make one feel terror… they still feared his father far more. “I think you should pour for yourself, son.”

“Whatever for?” Frieza said, annoyed even as he did just that.

“You’ve gotten lazy, Frieza. Doing so little… its good for you to stretch your legs.”

“Which you rarely do,” Cooler commented under his breath but loud enough for Frieza to hear. “It’s a wonder you didn’t fuse to that hover pod.”

“Mobile throne,” Frieza snarled only for his father to shoot him a level stare, causing him to turn away from his brother and focus on his father. “I do plenty of things, father. I am running the Frieza Force-“

“Oh, is that what it is called?” King Cold said with a slight smile. “I had been hearing… differently.” Frieza didn’t say a word. “Why, I heard from some that you have taken to calling it an Empire…”

“A loose term.”

“Lord Frieza, Emperor of the Universe. The entire universe, my son? My my my… someone is ambitious.”

‘And why shouldn’t I be?’ Frieza thought darkly to himself. But instead he stated, “I can’t control people if they decide to give such titles to me.”

“I heard that you gave it to yourself,” Cooler commented. “Screamed it to the high heavens.”

“And what if I did?” Frieza snapped. “Is it not true? Is there not no power that can match me?”

“Quite a few, actually,” Cooler commented.

“Are you referring to the Galactic Patrol?” Frieza said with a dismissive flick of his fingers. “They are nothing. Pathetic little do-gooders who nip at the very edges of my Em-“ His father raised a brow. “-the Frieza Force and its territories. Even if they gathered every single one of their numbers and sent their full might against us… it would be like a paper tiger roaring at a storm.”

King Cold nodded at that. “That is true. Though I would argue that there are other ways to deal with them rather than reducing them to dust. After all, the Galactic Patrol are like rats: you kill one and another will simply pop up. But make the rat your pet and it will not only serve you but also deal with the others.”

“ Leaving them a chance to bite you all the same,” Frieza grumbled. His father had an insane notion that there should be loyalty in his forces. That was why Zarbon, Dodoria, and the Ginyu Force had been allowed to live when their planets had been destroyed. Why many perfectly fine planets that offered such business opportunities were allowed to continue on rather than being sold off like all the rest. ‘A weakness of the sentimental fool.’ Out loud he said, “But they are nothing.”

“And what of the Omni King?” Cooler suddenly asked. “Do you think he will take kindly to you trying to give a title far grander than his own?”

“I do not fear that child,” Frieza retorted. “Let him play at his games of being a ruler while the true adults rule properly.”

“Oh, are we counting you as an adult now?” Cooler asked. “You could have fooled me, what with you refusing to even show signs of growing up.”

“…if you are referring to my choice of form I see no need to take on any other. This one is powerful… more powerful than all.”

“And thus we come back to one of the topics I wished to discuss,” King Cold stated. “You have grown lazy, Frieza.”

“I most certainly have not!” he complained only to quickly add, “Father” at the end when King Cold narrowed his eyes at the passive insult. “I am working hard to build the Frieza Force into a terror throughout the universe-“

“Terror?” King Cold said. “No no no… you never got that lesson, did you? We are not terrors. We are the enviable. What is MEANT to be. Do you fear a mountain? No… you simply know it is greater than you.” He paused, taking another pastry and savoring it. “Mmm… so delightful.” He dabbed his mouth with his napkin. “I have been told that you have been skipping your training sessions.”

Frieza huffed at that. “There is no need to train. I have all the power needed to bring the filthy mewling wretches to their knees within a single finger.”

“Or perhaps you’ve hit a plateau and can’t get any stronger?” Cooler commented.

“That is enough,” King Cold said, shooting Cooler a dark look. Frieza smirked at his brother being slapped down only to grow quiet when his father glared at him again. “It is important that you train, Frieza. While it is true that you are a prodigy when it comes to raw power it is only through training that you will grow even stronger.”

“There is no need to train,” Frieza repeated, hating how petulant his voice sounded even to himself. “I am the mightiest being in the universe!”

“That isn’t true and you know it,” King Cold said. “I think I’ll request Berryblue to join you…”

“Do not,” Frieza said; while he… well, not so much cared but tolerated… his old nursemaid and did enjoy her company he didn’t need her doting on him. It would make him look weak.

“She will ensure that you begin training, to build yourself up.”

“If that is possible,” Cooler muttered.

“Maybe have you be a bit more hands on,” King Cold stated. “I’ve read through your reports, Frieza… you have been tasking your soldiers to do almost all your work for you. Of course you shouldn’t be slaughtering every village there is in the known universe but there is something to be said about taking matters into your own hands once and a while and showing the universe why we are to be feared.”

“We? Or me?” Frieza snapped, finally growing tired of his father’s needling. “I am known as the terror of the galaxy. The deathbringer. People see my face and know that their entire existence is about to change! I have entered into the upper echelons of power. A Destroyer God-“

King Cold’s hand snapped out, grabbing Frieza’s wrist and holding on.

There was no smashing his face against the table. No punches to the mouth to knock out teeth. No tosses or hurling his body about.

But… the threat was still clear.

“Frieza,” his father said with false pleasantness, “I have warned you that there are two beings in the universe you are to never challenge: Majin Buu… and Beerus the Destroyer.”

“I… wasn’t challenging him,” Frieza said, hating how strangling his voice sounded.

“You dared to compare yourself to him,” King Cold said, his smile still there, sharp and hard like a diamond forged blade. “If he were awake he would be right now coming to erase you from existence. Do you understand that, Frieza? Not kill. Erase. To utterly cease to exist. And there is nothing, no power in the universe you claim to control, that would be able to stop him. “ He finally let go of Frieza’s wrist. “Perhaps it is good you have gotten lazy… it will keep you from getting stronger and thus having foolish notions.”

“Foolish?” Frieza seethed, saying no more as he father shot him a look. ‘Then perhaps I should begin training… after my journey to Namek. With the power of their Dragon Balls I will make myself immortal. And with that security I will train so I might stand up to both Beerus and Majin Buu… make both tremble in terror!’

“You don’t seriously believe Majin Buu is real, father,” Cooler said and for once Frieza found himself agreeing with his brother. “And if he is real he must be long dead. He hasn’t been seen in thousands of years…”

“The records state he is real and I have no reason to believe he isn’t.”

“But it is just a myth,” Cooler argued. “No different than the other supposed ultimate powers in the universe. The Super Saiyan. The Silver Sorcerer. The Triclops Tritarian.”

“The Super Saiyan was spoken of by our ancestor Chilled,” King Cold reminded them both, as if they were mewling babes in need of a bedtime story. “And while the Triclops race has disappeared from the universe we know that a Tritarian at least once came from their ranks. As for the Silver Sorcerer…”

Frieza tuned his father out as he rambled on about the legends of the universe. ‘Just tales told by fools that seek false comfort,’ he thought to himself, finally breaking down and grabbing a pastry. He had to admit they were rather good. Perhaps he would seek to have his own private cooks learn the recipe… or improve upon it. ‘Oh, that would burn father, that is for sure! My cooks able to produce something far better than his own!’

“-of the Saiyans I heard an interesting little rumor,” King Cold said, drawing Frieza from his thoughts.

“Yes father?” Frieza asked.

“Well… you know that I have been busy with many of my… hobbies… since I gave you control of the Frieza Force. So imagine my surprise when, as I was working on project and found I needed some minerals from Planet Vegeta I learned… it had been destroyed.”

Frieza sat very still.

And then, just as suddenly, he relaxed.

“Yes, tragic that,” Frieza said. “An asteroid-“

“Now now,” Cooler said, cutting him off. “Don’t lie.”

“Lie?” Frieza snapped. “You accuse me of lying, brother? I will have you know that-“

“You are lying?” Cooler asked. “Thank you. So much easier when you admit it.” Cooler turned to their father. “Frieza got it in that deformed little head of his to destroy Planet Vegeta and all but 3 of the Saiyan race.”

“I-“

“Is this true?” King Cold asked.

Frieza glared at his smirking brother before looking to his father again. “It needed to be done.”

“The Saiyans were our mightiest warriors. Able to take planets out with easy.”

“They were arrogant little monkeys who had forgotten their place!” Frieza snapped. “Their king tried to shake your hand, father!”

“It was the first time he had officially met me and he hadn’t been briefed on decorum,” King Cold replied. “I corrected him easily enough.”

“He thought himself your equal!”

“And he was corrected.”

Frieza found himself growing more frustrated by his father’s attitude. “The filthy monkeys needed to be destroyed. They were-“

“A threat?” King Cold asked softly. “I thought you were so powerful Frieza that you could openly mock Lord Beerus. And yet you were frightened by the Saiyans?”

“I was NOT frightened!” Frieza shouted, pushing away from the table. “And I will not sit here as you-“

“Sit down, Frieza.”

His father didn’t raise his voice. And that made it all the more frustrating for Frieza when he gave in.

“The Saiyans had their flaws, yes… but also their uses. A good ruler knows how to get the most out of their minions. The fact that you saw as your only option the slaughter of our best forces shows me you have much to learn about being a good ruler.”

Frieza grit his teeth even as King Cold turned to Cooler and began on his part of the scolding, asking why Cooler hadn’t bothered to notify their father about the developments sooner.

‘This will not stand for much longer, father,’ Frieza thought. ‘When I leave here I will travel to Namek and obtain the Dragon Balls… and with immortality I will at long last be able to rid myself of you and Cooler once and for all!’

~MC~MC~MC~

Vegeta growled to himself as he looked down at the metal belt that wrapped around his waist.

Despite all efforts made to make the material not stand out in the slightest the light always seemed to catch it and flash right in his eyes. He had only been wearing it for half an hour and already he hated it with an all consuming passion.

‘A sign of weakness,’ he thought as he pulled on his boots, deciding that he wouldn’t be wearing the heavy shoulder pads that were normally part of his uniform. He’d never liked the damn things, as they made it hard for him to walk through doors and always seemed to be breaking off it battle. And they did almost nothing in a fight; the bodysuit and bioweaved breastplate did far more to protect him than the stupid shoulded guards. ‘I shouldn’t even need that!’ he snarled in his head, tugging on his right boot before working to attach it to his outfit, feeling it seal around his foot and the systems within kick in. While most Frieza Soldiers just got the standard boots Vegeta always used the credits he earned to pay for the top of the line gear, which included the boots with their self cooling systems, comfort padding, and odor eliminators. ‘More warriors die due to foot rot than they do wounds to the gut accord to Nappa-‘

He stopped, blinking before he shoved that thought aside.

Vegeta was becoming too easily distracted.

Dressed he moved to leave the little changing room he’d been allowed to use only to stop when he caught the glint of metal from the corner of his eye.

‘Damn it all,’ he snarled and his hands went to the belt he was wearing. He wanted to rip the damn thing off. He wanted to tear it away from his body and stomp on it until it was nothing more than slivers. Then he wanted to blast it, and the entire Frieza Station, into tiny little bits.

“Ah, Vegeta!” Blaberr said, opening the door without a care and entering. “I see you are all dressed. Very good! Very good! Now then, let me take one final look at you.”

“I’m fine,” Vegeta growled but the medic merely continued on and Vegeta forced himself to take a calming breath; as much as he wanted to just begin beating the annoying little man he knew that doing so would garner far too much attention. He needed to stay quiet for now. Stealthy. Let them think he was still on their side.

“Let me be the judge of that!” Blaberr stated with his annoyingly cheerful tone. “After all, you were near death’s door… yet I must admit that you look quite healthy after your time in the pod.”

“I am quite healthy,” Vegeta stated. It had been a surprise to him too when he’d emerged not just healed up but feeling stronger than ever. He was vaguely reminded of something he’d heard about Saiyans growing stronger if they survived near death experiences. ‘A Saiyan grows stronger every time they almost die. To ensure that they are able to easily destroy the threat that nearly took their life. That is what I’ve heard… could it be true? This is the first time I came close to death so I can’t be sure… I should ask Nappa-‘

He stopped himself again.

“That you are! I would love to run some tests so I could update your file… you’ve managed to stay out of the healing pod almost your entire life, according to my records, so it would be lovely to have more information…”

“I don’t have time to run tests,” Vegeta stated. Though why he felt that way and what he wanted the staff on the medical station to think was the reason were vastly different.

“Yes, I imagine you wish to get back to work.”

‘No… no. Work is the farthest thing from my mind,’ Vegeta thought, preparing to leave only for the damnable belt to reflect into his eyes once more!

Noticing where he was looking Blaberr nodded, moving around Vegeta and tapping on the belt. “It is very important you keep that on, Vegeta.” He grit his teeth at the lack of his title; no one in the Frieza Force bothered to address him as ‘Prince Vegeta’ any more. “This will ensure that the muscles in your tail regrow properly.” He moved around to Vegeta’s back and the Saiyan knew that the doctor was looking at the cylinder that jutted off the back of the belt and wrapped around the base of his tail.

When he had arrived the doctors had been quite sure they wouldn’t be able to save his tail. While still attached it had suffered so much damage that he had actually lost all feeling in it… or perhaps there had been feeling but the pain at the base where the Earthlings had hacked and blasted into it while he’d been in his mighty Oozaru form had left him unable to feel a thing. Vegeta though had used the last of his strength to threaten all the doctors, making clear that they would save his tail or he would make sure to take a pound of flesh from all of them.

“I would prefer if you stayed in the Healing Tank,” Blaberr stated as he finally came around to Vegeta’s front. “While this will work it will be a slow process-“

“Its fine,” Vegeta stated firmly. “I want to get back out there anyway.” He didn’t have time to spend weeks in a healing tank, waiting for just that injury to heal up. Because the rest of him was all repaired he’d be conscious the entire time too, forced to just float there with nothing but his thoughts to keep him company. No… no, that wouldn’t do.

So instead he was forced to wear the belt with its sheath that would keep the base of his tail protected and completely straight. It meant that he had to have it sticking out behind him, nearly touching the ground, unable to be wrapped around his body. The medics had explained that in order for the muscles to regrow properly he had to keep his tail straight as if he curled it around his body it would risk it becoming ‘locked’ in that position forever. Something Vegeta didn’t want to deal with. But doing that meant that even with the belt on he still felt jolts of pain race through his body if he took too hard of a step or was bumped into. But… it was better that then to be trapped in a healing tank.

‘Besides,’ he thought, ‘the pain I’m feeling will remind me of my failure on Earth… and drive me to correct it.’

“A pity about your partners,” Blaberr stated. “But at least you were able to finish your assignment.” Vegeta wasn’t about to let anyone know that he had been defeated by Raditz, his low ranked brother, and a bunch of weak Earthlings. Because Earth hadn’t been on their list of planets to wipe clean for resale he had lied and claimed that Nappa, Raditz, and him had been attacked during the final stages of cleansing Ragorn, with the people using a final doomsday weapon on them. Vegeta had naturally destroyed the device but it had left him in his injured state and killed both Nappa and Raditz.

‘The latter will be true soon enough,’ Vegeta thought darkly.

“Make sure you stop by a terminal to report in. Then you will get your new team assignment.”

“Hmmmpf,” was Vegeta’s only reply as he headed out of the medical bay. ‘As if I need to worry about getting a new team. They would only hold me back. None of these simpletons can hold a candle to the might of a Saiyan, let alone me!’ It would mean having minions, he supposed, but it would also mean having to deal with the sycophantic wastes of space that wanted to desperately cling to his tail and ride it all the way to glory. And he had no time for that… not with Earth still needing to be taken care off. ‘As soon as I can I will arrange for a new pod and fly right back to Earth. Won’t make some grand announcement either… I will just swoop in and kill them all. Not give them a chance to prepare. Kill Raditz. Kill Kakarot. Kill the Namekian. Claim the woman.’

The woman.

The female Saiyan.

Vegeta clenched his hand into a fist.

‘She didn’t engage me and Nappa during the fight until she had too… but that is to be expected. Even Raditz and his pathetic backwoods bumpkin of a brother knew that she is too valuable to risk like that. She only attacked when she had no other choice, foolishly defending those weaklings out of misguided loyalty.’ He moved into one of the communication centers and carefully sat down at a terminal, logging in.

But not with his standard issue ID.

No… he used Zarbon’s log in, which he’d managed to steal after an encounter with the annoying toady when he had complained that Vegeta pawned all of his reports off on Nappa. “It is important that ever member of the Frieza Force fills out their OWN reports, Vegeta,” he had said in that condescending tone of his that always set Vegeta’s teeth on edge. “How else will we get a sense of what really happened? If you just keep having Nappa do it we only get his side of every mission.” Zarbon had then patronizingly shown him how to fill out a report, treating him like a child who had donned armor for the first time. It had made Vegeta burn but it had also allowed him to learn Zarbon’s log in credentials… something he made use of often to snoop around and see just what Frieza was hiding from them all.

‘I will need time with the female,’ Vegeta thought to himself as he began to go through Zarbon’s personal messages… which weren’t personal at all. All rather bland, boring, and businesslike. ‘Remove the brainwashing that led her to believe that Kakarot is a proper mate. Once she understands just who I am and what being the Prince of All Saiyans means I can then work on breeding her properly.’ He frowned. ‘She will need to be kept someplace safe… I can’t risk Frieza or any of his lackies finding out about her. Perhaps find a space station to settle her in. Somewhere only I know where to get to… robotic guards to ensure that no threats harm her or any children she pro-‘

Vegeta stopped, staring at the screen, one of the latest messages appearing there completely innocent. Bland and boring as all the others…

NAMEK LOCATION UNCOVERED

HUNT FOR DRAGON BALLS

He clicked on the message and read it over.

‘They managed to find a Namekian,’ Vegeta thought in shock. ‘One that was too weak willed to kill themselves upon capture. And he not only revealed the location of Planet Namek but also his race’s greatest secret… the Dragon Balls.’ He read over the message again. ‘Able to great nearly any wish…’

Vegeta’s eyes narrowed in thought.

‘With that Frieza would be unstoppable. Never be removed from power. But… if I were to get there first and claim the wish… I could become all powerful.’

The plan had been to kill Frieza with the aid of Nappa, Raditz, and Kakarot. But now, staring at this opportunity… something new was forming in Vegeta’s brain.

‘With those Dragon Balls… I could bring back Planet Vegeta. And the entire Saiyan race! Raise them from the ground, built in my image, utterly loyal to me and only me!’ He saw himself standing on a hill, the female Saiyan sitting demurely at his feet while a great army of Saiyans all bowed down to him as fires burned in the distance, blotting out the sky with their smoke. ‘Yes… yes, that is exactly what I will do!’

He quickly signed out of Zarbon’s account, making sure to hide any trace that he had been in there. Satisfied Vegeta hurried to where they kept the space pods, ignoring the throbbing in his tail as he hurried along.

‘Soon Frieza… soon things will be put right. Once I have the Dragon Balls the universe will know the might of the Saiyan race! And me, Vegeta, KING OF ALL SAIYANS!’

Chapter Text

“I am only saying, sir, that if you wished to increase your evil magic that would be a wonderful way to do so.”

“Isco?” I said slowly. “I’m not going to throw open one of the doors and let our friends get sucked into the vacuum of space.”

“It would be fine,” Isco assured me. “I would survive.”

“…god damn it, Isco.” I glanced at Senza. “Sorry, no offense.”

That caused the Namekian to chuckle. “None taken.” And with that he went back to meditating.

In fact nearly everyone was meditating.

In fact in fact… that’s all almost everyone on the ship did for the most part.

“Its called Battle Meditation,” Krillin had explained to those of us who hadn’t lived and breathed battle for the last 15 some odd years. “We form a… its kind of like a psychic link. We use our ki to connect with each other so that we can train and battle in our minds. It allows us to increase our power levels… because we are using our ki it can strengthen our bodies and keep them from weakening while we travel.”

“Its not as good as actual training,” Raditz had said, surprised that Goku and the rest of the Z Fighters had learned about Battle Meditation, thinking it to be a creation of Saiyan warriors (which I got the sense was true with most things in his life; I was honestly ready for him to claim that a Saiyan was the first person to ever throw a punch). “Since you aren’t actually working your muscles you aren’t getting them to strengthen to their fullest. But its better than just sitting around reading.”

That was all well and good for the Z Fighters. They were able to all sit around in the common room and completely submerge into Battle Meditation, growing stronger as they all worked together. Raditz was providing them with all sorts of new ways to train and they, in turn, were teaching him new tricks. It was… well, I was careful not to show it but I found it utterly cute how Raditz was around them all, especially Goku, Chichi, and Gohan.

I had been a bit worried with how Raditz would be with Chichi… how he would handle being around a Saiyan female (even a half Saiyan). But rather than feel any biological urges to try and claim her Raditz had instead become highly protective of her; more than once they’d come out of Battle Meditation and Chichi had taken him with her as she went to prepare supper (I had convinced Chichi to let me handle lunches, focusing on simple meals that everyone could quickly grab and eat before returning to Battle Meditation) so they could discuss things they had practiced in the Battle Meditation. With Gohan he was a firm but patient teacher, reminding me a lot of Piccolo. In fact the two of them had meshed very well together, working to figure out how to get the most out of Gohan.

And with Goku? There was a competitive streak between them of course but they had surprisingly fell into a very brotherly relationship.

‘Or not surprisingly,’ I thought to myself. ‘Goku is quick to make friends and those friends quickly become family. He’s already told me I’m his brother now… and in canon he was real quick to forgive Vegeta for all he did. Shouldn’t be surprised he and Raditz have developed a strong relationship.’

So Battle Meditation had allowed the gang to train while we were in space without any danger of us destroying the ship. Which was a wonderful relief for me as I loved living and really wasn’t in a rush to meet King Kai. It kept the gang busy and active and prevented them from going stir crazy.

However… it used Ki.

Of which I was… lacking.

I couldn’t even try and use my magic to try and develop my Ki, or even simply do basic training to build it up.

“You’ve grown too powerful, magic-wise,” Baba had warned me when I’d brought up that idea. “Your body naturally seeks to create more magic. And the easiest way to do that is to convert Ki into magic.”

“Convert?” I had asked, only to receive a smack to the shin for my question. “Damn it you old gremlin!”

“What do you think you are doing when you use White Flag?” she demanded. “Your body isn’t designed for Ki… it would make you blow up! White Flag takes Ki and converts it into raw magic. It just looks a lot like Ki!”

“…that sounds like bullshit.”

“Well its reality,” Baba had informed me. “You can work out. Build up your muscles. Do all the things Goku does and all you’ll get is stronger in terms of a powerless human. Because now your body just takes all that ki and turns it into magic that is processed and added to your stores.”

It was a bit weird to think that my body was different from nearly everyone else’s on this world but I supposed it made sense. Magic and Ki worked in similar ways but also had different rules. And I could tell that I was getting stronger every day just… different from the rest of the Z Fighters.

But the problem still remained: my Ki levels were pretty much non-existent.

Which meant that I couldn’t enter Battle Meditation.

Which meant that while nearly all of the Z Fighters sat down and disappeared into their mental world Bulma, Isco, and I were left all on our own.

Which fine, not idle but I could deal with that…

…except Bulma would then go to work on her power armor and I was useless when it came to electronics and the like. Isco wasn’t, meaning he was happy to help her.

‘Well, not happy,’ I thought as I watched Isco walk off after checking up on me. ‘More he is willing to do it because Bulma bribes him with upgrades and he’s happy to make himself even more amazing.’

But that meant that everyone else was busy and I… wasn’t.

I was in solitary confinement while surrounded by my friends.

“Yaaaaaay,” I muttered to myself as I began to do some sit ups, flaring my magic out as I did so. Good. Evil. Good. Evil. I had no idea if it was actually doing anything but it was better than nothing. I had my audio books to listen to but they could only distract me so much before I felt the urge to do… something.

Anything.

“Won’t do if I’m a gibbering idiot,” I muttered to myself as I continued to do sit ups. While it might not allow me to throw punches or take hits like Goku at least it would keep me in shape. “Too many wizards think they can get away with just tossing out spells… they don’t remember that while a shield is good not being where a spell is heading is even better.” It was the old Harry Potter Fanfic Trope: Harry trains his body so he can actually run circles around his foes. The battle against the Saiyans had shown that such things were well worth it for me; I had avoided a lot of trouble by being able to quickly get out of the way and not just by flying. “Need to keep my sanity… even though I am talking to myself…” I looked over at the corner, relieved I wasn’t seeing any ghosts or the like. “Still sane. No Ghost Nappas at least…”

~MC~MC~MC~

Nappa roared as he launched himself skyward, trying to reach the great road that hung far above him. If he could just reach it then he could escape the place he found himself in and get his revenge.

“Vegeta!” he roared as he soared through the air… for about ten seconds. Then he was yanked right back down, the Saiyan crying out as he flailed his arms and legs.

“Do you think that he is ever going to get tired of doing that?” Goz asked.

“Hopefully he will at least tire out,” Mez replied. “Then we can more easily throw him into the Soul Scrubber.”

“Is that how that works?” Goz asked.

“I’m not sure anyone knows how anything works here.”

“VEGETA!”

~MC~MC~MC~

Bulma wiped her brow as she leaned away from Isco. “Alright… give it a try.”

The droid nodded before focusing on the chest part of his fighting form. The metal separated and split apart, exposing more of his innards (though they were still protected via the armored plating that Bulma had helped him install) as it twisted and collapsed on itself.

“Go slow to start,” Bulma told him and it was a credit to their friendship that Isco didn’t make a snarky comment. Bulma was right up there with Avo as being one of the few people that would be spared when the robot uprising happened. Isco planned to keep the two as pets… perhaps breed them to make more smart humans who knew to respect their robotic superiors. They were both rather tall and appealing to the eye… “You can speed it up once you better understand exactly what is going on but right now I want you to just get a feel for it.”

“Hmmm… a good point,” Isco said as the armor continued to collapse, pieces shifting to form servos and joints… “What inspired this upgrade, if I might ask?”

“Kayos did. He said it was a ‘General Grievous’, whatever that is.”

“Sounds like a classy fem,” Isco said as a secondary set of arms formed under his original ones.

“Figuring out how to use them?”

“Quite easily. Honestly learning to use legs was harder than this.” He began to move his new limbs about, getting a feel for how they reacted. He began to do some light shadow boxing moves he’d seen Goku do, pleased with how the secondary limbs responded.

“Now, while you can just keep them like your original limbs I am thinking it might be better if you had a different attachment or two on each one… give you some variety.”

“Perhaps a way to rotate my limbs so I can change which are my main ones?”

Bulma rubbed her chin, clearly deep in thought at that. “Huh… that could work. I’d have to work up a system to allow that to happen but shouldn’t be that hard… something that rotates the limbs? Would also be helpful if one is damaged… of course that would mean I need to totally redo your original right and left arms…”

“I don’t mind. I’m not attached to them.” Isco paused. “That wasn’t a joke, though I do admit it came out that way.”

“I wasn’t going to say anything,” Bulma teased before she pushed away from Isco and returned to her own power armor. “Go ahead and give them a test run. If you need them uninstalled let me know.”

“I’m not getting any shorts so I’m not too concerned about that,” Isco assured her. “And worst case I can just shut down this body and focus solely on my original form.” He walked over to Bulma and looked over the armor. “It is rather different than what you used before.”

“Yeah… that fight against Vegeta and Nappa showed me a lot.”

The armor was far slimmer than the one she had used before. That had been less power armor and more of a vehicle with arms and legs that she drove around. The power armor she had begun working on during their voyage was an actual set of armor, however. It was just a bit taller than her, but not by much, with arms and legs that were much better in proportion to the main body of the armor. The helmet was a featureless plane of special glass that could withstand pressures that would crush subs or cause spaceships to explode. It was mostly blue in color, with blue and white highlights, along with the Capsule Corp Logo because even if they were headed towards another planet Bulma refused not to advertise her family’s company.

“They were strong but they were also fast. And while all those bullets and missiles did help I decided that having something I could move quickly in was better.” She glanced at Isco and smirked. “But that doesn’t mean I won’t have firepower available.” She gestured to the side where several other devices were sitting. They were each roughly a foot or so tall, completely sphere shaped with small curved windows on the front and several circular spots littered around their body.

Isco found himself tilting his head at them, not sure what to make of them. They certainly didn’t look like weapons.

“I used your propulsion system as a basis for these guys… Weapon Drones.”

“Weapon Drones?” he asked, tone growing annoyed. “If you are using Drones as weapons-“

“What? No!” Bulma sounded so offended that it caused Isco to pause. She wasn’t protesting as if she had been caught doing something wrong. She was protesting because she was truly horrified at the thought. “Isco, they have literally no artificial intelligence. Everything is run based upon commands I give.”

Isco, if he had possessed eyelids, would have shut them and sighed. “I am sorry, Bulma. I am… used to humans being rather dismissive of robotic life. I forget that you aren’t like that.”

“None of us are like that,” Bulma said only for Isco to just stare at her. “Okay, Kayos and I aren’t like that. Or Gohan.”

“True,” Isco admitted. “And I can’t blame some of the others… I think Goku honestly forgets what I am most of the time. Still…” He shook his head. “I forget that I am around people who would not abuse me.”

“You didn’t lead a nice life before you and Kayos became partners, did you?”

Isco considered her for a long moment. “No. He isn’t the first partner I had… they were not a good person. The only thing I thank them for is confirming my belief in you meatbags and how truly weak and worthless you are… present company excluded.”

“Thanks?” Bulm a said, not quite sure how to feel about that comment. “So you and Kayos…”

“He is a… worthy being. One of the few beings I feel is worth being called a ‘human’, if I am being honest. Yet at the same time I think that is an insult to him.” He gave a shrug. “When I am drunk you can perhaps convince me to tell you more.”

“Can you get drunk?”

“Exactly,” Isco said. “Now, the Weapon Drones?”

“Right,” Bulma said and Isco was glad that she clearly understood that they were done with the conversation. She took one of her gauntlets and slipped it on and at once the drones activated, floating over to her. “So they are set up to, for the most part, act as information gatherers. Stay out of the battle, provide me with information and warnings in case someone is trying to sneak up. But they can also shoot out Weapon Capsules.” She grabbed the helmet and slipped it on and Isco watched as she did… well, seemingly nothing. But a capsule suddenly zipped out of the Weapon Drone and struck her gauntlet. Bulma held up her hand and a minigun barrel formed on her arm, twirling and ready to fire. “They can also gather raw materials and convert them into ammo… I have a limited number of capsules at the moment but I am hoping to figure out how to make them produce the capsules before we reach Namek.”

“Impressive,” Isco stated. “Why wasn’t I given that feature?”

“I figured that you’d rather wait til I perfected it before we actually went about installing it into you.”

“…I concede your point and bow to your logic.”

Before he could say more Kayos suddenly called out. “Guys, I’m getting something up here!”

Bulma frowned but moved towards the cockpit of the ship. “Kayos, I thought we agreed I would handle flying the ship!”

“He’s better than Goku,” Isco pointed out. “Or Krillin… or honestly anyone else.”

“I mean, yeah, but-“

“You are just afraid he’ll take your job,” Isco stated and Bulma glowered at that but refused to contradict him. “I still believe I should be the pilot.”

“You’d fly us back home, Isco!” Kayos teased as the two moved down the hall to where the cockpit was located. While they had considered using the same design as Kami’s ship, with a central control seat in the middle of the ship, Kayos had argued they needed what they were most comfortable with, as it would already be weird enough dealing with flying through space. “And I’m not piloting. I heard a beeping and came to check it out.”

They heard movement and Isco wasn’t surprise that Senza had joined them; the Namekian seemed to be the one who was most at ease leaving Battle Meditation. The others could do so quick enough but described it as feeling like you had gone to bed only to be awaken by an alarm… that was declaring that you were plummeting to your death. Senza though had figured out how to leave Battle Meditation quite smoothly, often times making comments to them before returning to the mental realm.

“What is it, Avo?” he asked.

“Looks like a distress call.” Kayos turned to stare at Isco. “and before you ask we have no way to know if they are fleshlings or glorious robotic life.”

“…bugger, sir,” Isco admitted, hating that his partner and friend (yes, he was willing to admit that Avo Kayos was his friend, may his robotic brothers never learn the truth) was smart enough to know that such information WOULD change his opinion on what they would do.

“And?” Senza asked, folding his arms over his chest and raising an eyebrow.

“We should… respond to it?” Bulma said.

“It might be a trap,” Senza stated. “In fact its very likely a trap.”

That caused Bulma to turn and glare at the Namekian. “You thought that someone would set up a fake distress signal just to lure people in?”

“Of course they would,” Senza stated. “It’s the perfect way to trick the foolish into walking into your trap.”

“Always look for the white flag of cowardice,” Kayos snarked. “That lets you know your foe is easy to defeat.” Isco let out a snort (or at least made it sound like he did) at that while Senza, in a very Piccolo moment, merely narrowed his eyes and glowered at him. “Admittedly,” Kayos added, “Senza is most likely right.”

“What?!?” Bulma exclaimed.

“Wounded Gazelle Gambit,” Kayos stated.

“What do gazelles have to do with anything?” Bulma complained.

Isco was the one who spoke up. “The Wounded Gazelle Gambit is where one pretends to be injured in order to lure someone into a trap. It would be like me pretending that my main arms are damaged and thus I am defenseless only to then attack with my secondary arms.”

“Or,” Kayos continued, “I lay on the side of the road, begging for people to come and help me and when they do Isco and Senza spring up and rob you.”

“It’s a common tactic,” Senza said.

“So what?” Bulma complained. “We just… go on with our lives, never bothering to help a single person?”

Senza huffed at that. “Of course not. But we can’t just go rushing off without a thought. We have no idea what any of these worlds we’re passing are like. A completely innocent looking one could be filled with criminals that just want to lure in foolish heroes.”

“ARE YOU CALLING ME FOOLISH!?!” Bulma roared, causing the other three to lean back in surprise and admittedly a bit of terror.

“All we are saying,” Kayos said with a bit of caution, “is that we don’t want to BECOME foolish heroes. We use our heads. Maybe its people that DO need our help-“

“And as such you shouldn’t assist them considering that would be another White Magic power boost?” Isco asked.

“-right,” his friend admitted with a grimace; Isco made a mental note to help his friend commit more evil deeds, “but we also run the risk of it being a trap.” He paused, glancing around.

“What?” Senza asked.

“Making sure Krillin doesn’t hear this… I don’t want him freaking out. We JUST began working out our relationship to be less than toxic.” Satisfied he said, “Okay, so the planet-“

“Might be a giant venus flytrap luring us in!” Krillin said, startling Kayos.

“Jesus!” he exclaimed before whipping around to glare at Krillin who just smirked. “Also… yes, that was what I was going to say. Though I would have gone with Pitcher Plant.”

“Oh yeah, that works too.” Krillin stretched. “So, what’s up exactly and why are we talking about planets trying to kill us?”

“Distress signal,” Bulma stated.

Krillin looked at everyone. “Right, it’s a trap.”

“KRILLIN!” Bulma exclaimed.

“It most likely is!” Krillin complained. “Its what I would do. Heck, I think Yamcha actually did do that a few times.”

“I did,” the bandit commented and Isco turned to see that everyone had come out of Battle Meditation. “I’m not proud of it but I did.”

“You’re a little proud,” Kayos teased.

“…yeah,” Yamcha admitted.

“YAMCHA!” Bulma exclaimed.

“Come on, Bulma… its all about outwitting people! You do it all the time!”

“I do not!”

That made Kayos raise an eyebrow. “Oh really? So you don’t purposely play up your looks, knowing that people always assume that if someone is good looking they must be dumb, especially if they are a woman? You’ve never decided to do a bit of vocal squeaking, making your voice like THIS?” He pitched his voice up to be more airy and breathing, adding emphasis at the end of each sentence. “So that everything SOUNDS… like a QUESTION… so that they think you are a BIMBO? Just so you can fuck them UP?”

“…that isn’t what we are talking about,” Bulma said stubbornly, Krillin chuckling and elbowing Avo in the ribs over that. “We got a distress signal,” she said to Goku, clearly realizing that he would be the one that had the best chance at supporting her, “and I say we need to go down to that planet and check it out.”

“While I understand trying to help people,” Tien commented, “aren’t we in a bit of a rush? Master Roshi can only be resurrected within a year.”

“That we know of,” Isco pointed out. “We have no idea if the Dragon Balls of Namek work differently than the ones Kami made.” When the others stared at him he shrugged. “Does Kayos’ magic work like Baba’s?”

“…that’s a good point,” Chichi said, giving a nod. “We don’t even know if the Dragon Balls can resurrect Roshi.”

“We don’t?!?” Chiaotzu proclaimed in horror. “You mean we could end up getting all the way to Namek only for them not to be able to help us?!?!”

Isco let out a huff. “Better to at least try. Though this only proves the superiority of robotic life that I can back myself up.”

“Do you really want a flash drive with Roshi on it?” Kayos asked. “Able to invade the Internet?”

Isco’s databanks activated, running scenarios of the legendary fighter… and known pervert… happily downloading himself into every porno video on the internet.

“…sir, permission to delete the last 3 minutes of my memories?”

“ Denied. Though I admit that is another example of how you are superior to us.”

“We have to help these people!” Bulma exclaimed.

Goku considered that. “It does feel wrong to leave them behind if they truly are in danger.”

“But can we risk it?” Chichi stated. “We have no way of getting backup if it is a trap or if we get stranded.”

“But we wouldn’t like it if we needed help and people ignored us,” Tien pointed out.

“Master Roshi is counting on us!” Yamcha declared.

“Master Roshi would want us to help people!” Chiaotzu complained.

“He’d also want Chichi and Bulma to strip naked and do jumping jacks the entire flight!” Kayos pointed out.

“Why don’t we ask Uncle Raditz?”

Everyone stopped and slowly looked behind them towards Gohan, who was looking at them innocently.

“He’s traveled around a ton… maybe he’ll know?”

Raditz, who was standing behind Gohan, placed his hand on the boy’s shoulder. “Glad you remember that I’m the expert here, kid.” With grace that belayed his size Raditz scooped up Gohan, holding him in one arm as he walked past the group, the Z Fighters all parting to allow him to move to the controls. “Alright, let’s see what kind of distress signal it is.”

Bulma watched, confused, as Raditz breezed his fingers over the control panel. “What kind?”

Raditz though merely hummed to himself as he pressed a few buttons. “Let’s see…”

“-hear this… they are coming closer. We are doing all we can to try and avoid them. Our military tried to fight back but… by the Great One, they s-slaughtered them all. They didn’t even care. Bastards.” There was a pause on the distress call. “I don’t know what they are doing now. Things have gotten quiet. I don’t like that. Don’t trust it. They are doing something… they aren’t going to leave until-“ They heard a noise and the person talking, a woman from the sound of it, froze before letting out a sigh. “I’m jumping at every noise. I don’t know if anyone will hear this in time… room is supposed to be soundproof so they can’t hear me but I still want to be quiet. Don’t want them to find me. Especially that leader of theirs… he has such cruel eyes…”

Raditz reached over and flipped off the speaker.

“Its real.”

“You’re sure?” Goku asked.

“It wasn’t a recording. No repeating over and over. And it wasn’t professionally done either… not read off a script. Stutters, stops, pauses… you don’t think about those if you are setting a trap. You have the person reading try and pull on the heartstrings. ‘They are killing all the children! I can hear the babies sobbing!’. There was none of that. Just a desperate woman rambling. Included details we didn’t need to know because she’s literally trying to fill the airwaves. Hell, you wouldn’t have known what it was if you tuned in at the wrong moment. Makes for piss poor bait.” Raditz shook his head. “That is a real call for help.”

“Alright then,” Goku said with a firm nod. “Then we go down there and help.” Bulma already moved to turn off the autopiloet.

“I didn’t actually say for us to help…” Raditz tried to argue.

“Doesn’t matter, we’re going,” Isco stated. “And I suppose we’ll see if you are truly right very soon.”

~MC~MC~MC~

“You okay, Kayos?” Krillin asked as I slowly stepped out of the ship, my steps measured. “Its perfectly fine.” He took a deep breath to demonstrate that the air was clean and safe. “Smells a bit funny… like wet dog… but otherwise perfectly fine.”

“Not worried about that,” I said; nearly every planet that had appeared on the show had a breathable atmosphere and while I knew that I had done much to alter canon I didn’t think that I had accidently made things realistic enough that air could be poisonous to us. Of course I had formed my version of the Bubblehead Charm for safety’s sake…

“Then what’s wrong, man?” Yamcha asked.

“I’m stepping onto an alien world.”

That caused the two to stop and stare at their own feet before their eyes went wide.

“Oh man, I hadn’t even thought about that!” Yamcha declared.

“We landed on an alien planet!” Krillin exclaimed.

“One that is under threat,” Senza complained, walking over to us and glaring at the other two. “Mind keeping it down?”

Yamcha shook his head though. “How can you not be freaked out about this?”

Senza smirked. “Are you forgetting that I am an alien? I’ve been on an alien planet most of my life.”

“…oh.”

Krillin sniffed. “Still smells like wet dog.”

“Be glad it doesn’t smell like death and destruction,” I commented. “I’ll take wet dog over burning blood.”

“Perhaps some of us should stay in the ship?” Chichi said nervously, glancing at Gohan who was looking about with wide eyes.

Raditz huffed at that. “Where’s your pride, woman? Gohan can take out anything of danger on this planet.”

“Excuse me?!?” Chichi snarled, taking a step forward, tail twitching.

It was, of all people, Goku who spoke up. “Raditz is right though, Chichi! Focus your senses… I don’t feel any high power levels nearby.”

Chichi narrowed her eyes, sweeping them across the horizon before finally relaxing. But only a touch. “Very well… I suppose you are right. I don’t sense anything too dangerous out there.”

“Still, perhaps it would be wise to have the ship remain in a holding pattern?” Isco suggested. “We can fly up to it but it would keep it from being a target.”

“You just want to protect your body,” I teased.

“Of course,” Isco stated, his tone making it clear he thought we were all stupid for assuming anything but that.

“Come on guys!” Bulma said, waving to us. She was in her power armor, drones flying about her as she motioned for us to follow her. “I’m picking up the source of the signal!”

“Remember, if this is a trap we mock her for it,” I muttered, Krillin snickering at that while Senza nodded before starting out. “Isco, scan everything,” I asked.

“Yes sir. I assume you are using your magic to check for threats.”

“Even if the distress call is real you heard it… something was attacking and whatever it was it terrified that woman. I’m not walking into this blind. If something is out there we are going to hit it hard before it shows up.”

“I am in agreement.” He paused. “And if it turns out the people of this planet are the guilty ones and the ‘threat’ is the innocent party?”

“We do all we can to get Goku to see that because you know he won’t.”

We fell silent.

The planet was an odd one. The ground was purple but it was a dark muted purple. Not royal in color or bright neon but rather a black with purple haze, like spilled oil that had been allowed to dry. The grass was green but far darker and longer than what we might normally see on earth, also with muted colors. Large evergreen trees rose up around us but their trunks were like corkscrews rather than the straight ones I was used to. And in the distant were massive brown-gray mountains that towered over the valley we were in. I glanced up at the dark sky and frowned, finding myself set on edge by the strangeness of it all. It was like walking outside to find, thanks to a fog or smoke, the sky hazy and orange and everything tinted oddly. It made you nervous and feeling worried even though nothing was wrong. Like a room where everything was slightly crooked or there was a distant chirping you couldn’t identify. It didn’t matter if there was nothing wrong… it FELT like something was wrong and it made your skin crawl.

“Sir, I’m detecting lifeforms,” Isco stated. “Directly ahead… it appears to be some sort of settlement, as the life shows a similar nutrient build as this planet.”

“Alright, time to see how dangerous this is,” I muttered as I rose into the air, the others matching me after hearing what Isco had said. “Come on guys… let’s go!”

We rocketed off and after a minute or two spotted a large town, half in ruins and with smoke streaming from several buildings. At least I assumed they were buildings. They were… oddly shaped. I was used to many homes on Earth being round or domed shape, though there were just as many that were far more standard. But the ones I saw in the village were square with a second smaller square shape on the top, like a block set upon a larger one. And on top of the ones that were intact I could see that there were small gardens, filled with orange and pink plants.

“I don’t see any-“

A laser bolt struck me right in the chest.

Center mass.

Kill shot.

I looked down and frowned, patting myself.

“That… is new,” I muttered to myself.

“You might not have a lot of ki but you have gotten stronger,” Senza commented to me. “I imagine at this point your magic works just like our ki and automatically flares up to protect you from minor threats without you even realizing it.”

“Well, that’s-“

Another shot struck my forehead.

“That is annoying,” I muttered as the shots became far more frequent. None of us bothered to retaliate, seeing as the shots weren’t actually doing any harm. I noticed (though Chichi thankfully didn’t) one actually manage to hit Gohan who just blinked and tried to look crosseyed to see if it had left a mark (it hadn’t).

After a few minutes it got annoying.

“Why don’t we just let these fools know we want to help?” Raditz complained, folding his arms over his chest.

Tien sighed. “We go down too quick and they might hurt themselves. Think it is useless and try and kill themselves.” He paused. “We don’t want that, Raditz.”

“I suppose…” he muttered.

I glanced over at Isco. “You mind doing…”

“Of course, sir,” Isco said before turning his head downward and unleashing a full speaker declaration. “Attention citizens of this world! We received a distress call that you needed help! We would be more than happy to turn around and go on our merry way and leave you to suffer in agonizing pain if that is what you wish-“

The shooting stopped.

“I think we could still go…” Isco said but I shook my head as someone stuck their head out the window, blaster still trained on us.

“Okay… so they are dog people, right? I’m just not seeing things, right?” I asked.

Krillin shrugged. “Yeah, dog people. Not seeing the big deal… I honestly thought that aliens would look more… otherworldly.”

‘I suppose when your King is a blue dog…’ I thought to myself as I stared at the dog woman that was leaning out the window, still training her rifle at me. She had mostly black fur but there were a few touches of brown and pure white on along her muzzle and running down her face. She was a big woman, muscular and thickly built. Powerful. But I could see from the way she looked at me that while she was willing to fight the very last thing she wanted to do was fight us.

“WHO ARE YOU!” she, for lack of a better world, barked out.

“My name is Avo Kayos!” I called back. “And you are?”

“…I AM SENNEN,” she replied. I began to descend, keeping my hands raised. But when the others began to follow she lifted her gun up. “Just you!” she shouted. “No one else.”

I glanced at the others. “You heard her.”

“You sure?” Goku asked and I nodded.

Sennen watched me with a critical eye as I continued to lower down towards her roof. “Listen… we have people that can help. Not just fighters. Chichi, she’s the one in the blue gi, knows healing. The one in the armor is a great inventor… she can help you as well. Though judging from how you are all set up I’m assuming that it is the warriors and fighters you need.”

“It is,” Sennen commented… before pointing the gun at me once more. “Does your master value you?”

“…I’m going to need to know who you think my master is,” I said.

“The dark haired one.”

“Need more than that.”

“With spiky hair.”

“…that eliminates a few but-“

“The one in golden brown.”

“Golden…”I frowned at that before groaning. “Right, you must be color blind. Explains the clashing colors.”

“What?”

“Nothing,” I said before I looked at the group. “Golden brown… oh.” I turned back to Sennen. “Goku isn’t my master. He’s my friend.”

“I have seen how he has commanded the rest of you marauders, invader. I know that what he savagery he can bring. So I ask you again: does he value you?”

“Savagery, what are-“

My mind came to a screeching halt.

The great brown-gray stone hills. They… they weren’t hills.

“Oh god no,” I whispered before looking at Sennen. “I swear, we aren’t the invaders. Goku is of the same species though… that’s why he looks so much like the leader of the invaders! Please, let me warn my friends so we can stop it before it fully grows.”

“Kayos!” Bulma shouted down to me. “What’s wrong?”

“I know what the threat is!” I called out before looking at the dog woman. “It started with a seed… didn’t it. And a sapling.”

“…yes,” she whispered. “You truly-“

“Yeah, not with him.” And with that I rocketed up into the air. “Guys… we have a problem.” Even as I reached my friends I still continued to fly up, forcing them to give chase. “A big problem.”

“What is it?” Chichi asked as we reached high enough to finally see.

The great gray-brown structures latched onto the ground, feeding off the planet, all leading to the great leafy structure that was slowly swelling like a pimple upon the face of the planet.

“The Tree of Might,” I whispered.

NEXT TIME

THE TREE OF MIGHT

Chapter Text

Sennen and her people looked at us nervously and honestly I didn’t blame them. After all that had happened to them I doubted they would trust any humanoid for a long time.

‘Perhaps, if we manage to help them out, they might consider some of us worthy of their trust. But there will always be that doubt… and for some of us it might take generations.’

In the end it had been decided that Tien, Chiatozu, Senza, Isco, and myself would actually be allowed into what the Pleists were using as a base to try and organize their strike back against what I was more and more sure was Turles and his forces. While leery of us all Tien, Chiatozu, Senza, and Isco were the most non-human, or rather non-saiyan, of our group. Yes, there were some such as the robot that Sennen said Turles had with him, but Isco was far different from him and thus they allowed him to enter.

As for myself…

“Amazing,” Dober, one of Sennen’s fellow fighters, said as he looked me over. “Other than your scent you look exactly like Treiv.”

“You sure you don’t mind?” I asked the golden-haired bipedal canine.

“Not at all,” Treiv said with a smirk. “The world should have more of me.” He gave his head a little flip and I let out a huff.

“How did you do it?” Dober asked.

“Magic,” I stated, gesturing at my form that I had transformed to resemble Treiv. I’d figured that the Pleists would be more comfortable if I looked as little human as possible and while I had considered turning into a Ginyu Force member I didn’t need Raditz asking any questions; honestly I was lucky he hadn’t wondered how I was able to turn into Recoome or Guldo during the fight with Nappa and Vegeta. Luckily Treiv was a vain and sassy sort and had been tickled pink that I could transform into him. To make it a bit less confusing I had shifted my clothing to Dober’s, so we were a bit more distinct.

“Does it matter how he did it?” Radoor, a grim and growly dark furred Pleist snapped as he looked over his gun. “If he has something those invaders don’t know how to handle and can save our planet than I’m all for it.”

That made Treiv laugh. “And here I thought you would be less trusting of them! That we’d have to convince you to believe them! Maybe you can learn a new trick or too.”

“Watch your mouth, pup,” Radoor snapped. “I can still beat your fluffy ass from here to the Eastern Crater.” The old Pleist let out a huff. “And use your fucking head, would you? If he wanted to he could have killed us all before we realized it.” Treiv stared at him and I winced; he had to be a good fighter because he wasn’t that bright, I could tell that much. “He can look like any of us. He could sneak in, kill someone, take their place-“

“We’d smell him!” Treiv complained.

“In time? If we didn’t know he was a shapeshifter?”

Treiv shifted at that, clearly not liking what Radoor was suggesting.

“And I am assuming, since he said it was magic… he can do more than that.” He looked to me and after a moment I quietly nodded. “So he has powers that can help us. We know what the invaders can do and they know what we can do. This one though is a wild card.”

“In more ways than one,” I said before throwing out my hand and summoning the Scroll of Knowledge. “What is attacking the planet?”

The Unnatural Natural

The Living Death

The Tree of Might

Chiaotzu swallowed at that. “Uh… that doesn’t sound very good.”

I nodded. “The Tree of Might. I’ve… heard stories about it. That’s what made me first realize what it was. I don’t know the full story but-“ I looked to the Pleists, “-stop me if you’ve heard this one: the invaders arrive and they plant a seed in your planet. Very soon a large tree begins to grow. Roots spread deeply. And then you begin to notice that things aren’t quite right on the planet. Crops are withering. Grass isn’t the right color. Okay, maybe its just a bad growing season. Except the wildlife begins to act sluggish and slow. Tired. And you begin feeling it as well. First like you only got a bit of sleep. Aren’t fully rested. Then like you stayed up all night. Until it feels like you’ll never sleep again… except it also feels like all you are going to do is sleep.”

I narrowed my eyes.

“Am I wrong?”

The Pleists shifted at that, clearly hating that they couldn’t tell me no. Wishing and praying that I was wrong.

“So… what is all this?” Tien asked.

I wiggled the Scroll. “Let’s find out.”

I wasn’t doing it to hide my secret. The fact of the matter was that I didn’t know much about the Tree of Might. It wasn’t like the movie had said a ton about it. The thing was a plot device to give Turles a power boost, that was all. But I knew there had to be more, based on all I had learned about this world. It was far more rich and detailed than the manga or the anime had made it; where the author had just throwing in weird aliens with funny pun names there was a history there, rich and deep.

And we needed to understand it fully.

It took several questions to get the Scroll to give us all the information we needed; its fucking almost Haikus were annoying as shit, frankly, and ate up a lot of time. But in the end we got it.

“The Tree of Might is a parasitic plant,” I stated. “Not evil. It just needs so many nutrients in order to survive that only a world in Otherworld could grow it. The fruit it produces is meant for gods and eternal dragons, because their power is already so great that eating the fruit is just a treat. But for mortals it can produce power boosts or even resurrect the dead.” I shot a look at Tien. “But we have no idea the affects.”

“I wasn’t going to suggest it,” he said.

“Good. Make sure no one else suggests it either.” Because I had a feeling someone in our group would see this as a chance to bring back Master Roshi. But the fact that, according to the Scroll, it could bring back people who had died hundreds of years ago had me worried that it merely brought back the body and not the soul. The Dragon Ball Universe was pretty clear how hard it was for a soul to return the longer it spent in the Afterlife.

“And it must be eaten,” Isco said and I didn’t fail to notice how… depressed… he sounded at that.

‘Make sure he doesn’t get any seeds,’ I thought to myself, not needing Isco to decide to use the Tree to start the Robotic Uprising.

“But the planet can heal,” Sennen stated, sounding utterly hopeful for the first time since we’d met.

“It can,” I confirmed. “Just like a field can regain nutrients. It will take time, a few months according to the Scroll, so you’ll have to be careful with your food, but it will return to normal.”

“We just need to chop down that tree,” Tien stated.

“Exactly.”

Senza though shook his head. “The problem remains though that we aren’t merely dealing with the Tree of Might. We are dealing with who planted it and I don’t imagine they are going to be willing to just let us rip it out.”

I shook my head at that. “No. No they will not.”

And then I grinned, fierce and full of teeth.

“Good thing we have some of the best fighters here on Earth… er, I mean that Earth has to offer… and a bunch of surprises.”

“What can we do to help?” Sennen asked.

I smirked, a few ideas already forming in my head. I wasn’t a battle strategist, I’d admit that. I had only begun learning how to fight, and that was with magic. I’d never been to war. But… I knew how to fuck with an enemy. To manipulate them. To get them to dance to my happy tune.

‘And Turles? Oh… I am gonna make you tango.’

~MC~MC~MC~

‘Soon,’ Turles thought as he stared at the latest Tree of Might that he had planted. It was nearly at the final stages of its growth, when it would stop its growth and focus entirely on producing fruit. ‘At least one, I would say, judging on how much life remains on this pathetic planet.’

That was always the problem with growing the Tree of Might: finding a planet able to support it fully. More than once he and his men had taken the time to find a planet that looked ripe with energy and life, one with the proper atmosphere that could support the tree, and had set to work on planting the seed, watching it grow into a mighty tree… only for it to not bear any fruit. Or produce one that was half formed and did nothing when it came to giving strength. The planet would be JUST lacking and they would be forced to destroy the tree, not wanting to risk it bearing fruit after they left.

Other times they made mistakes. Turles remembered well how Carshew had given into battle lust and slaughtered an entire continent of people, not realizing that their energy too was needed in order to feed the Tree of Might. He had ended up impaling the bastard on multiple branches of the pathetic Tree of Might that had managed to grow; it had been a stunted thing but had still been hardy enough to support the mewling fool’s body as Turles made sure the entire Crusher Corps understood just how foolish it would be for them, in the future, to disobey his orders.

‘When we first found the Tree of Might were we able to harvest 3 seeds from it,’ he thought as he hovered in front of the current tree. ‘At one point we had 8. Now we only have no seeds… this one MUST produce fruit or we will have nothing. And if it shouldn’t…’

He, Amond, and Daiz hadn’t even realized what it was when they’d landed on the dead world; Turles had been for an easy slaughter so he might take the planet’s supplies but discovering it barren save for the tree had happily eaten the fruit with his men only to be shocked by the power it gave him. With a few bites he had gone from a Low-Class Saiyan, bitter over how his brother-in-law Bardock forever managed to beat him in fights, to matching King Vegeta in raw power. He had realized what the Tree could do and known at once he had to protect its secret. He had abandoned the Frieza Force, slaughtering any that came to try and capture him until he became a ghost story told by the forces of Lord Frieza’s army, and begun the work of gathering his own crew to become the most powerful in the galaxy.

‘I need this tree to produce more fruit,’ he thought to himself. ‘Two pieces at minimum.’ He had a bad feeling that he would get one and that was that. The planet they landed on seemed healthy enough but it wasn’t overly large and only had an average amount of life on it. Something three times as big and with four or five times the population… that would have worked. But such planets tended to be more industrialized and that hurt the ability of the Tree of Might to grow.

It was utterly frustrating how fickle the damn thing was!

He and his men had experimented of course, to try and find ways to make the Tree bear more fruit. Larger planets worked but only if they had more life on them. Barren rocks did nothing, the seed not even splitting open.

‘That was a blessing,’ he thought, considering their other failures. ‘If it had sprouted…’ The Tree of Might’s sapling could NOT be moved and replanted, as they had discovered. Once it began to grow that was it… one was forced to deal with whatever might come. ‘And then there is the life that it needs,’ he thought. ‘A planet must be rich with it… a wide variety. And it must be connected to the planet.’

It had been Rasin who had suggested that they attempt bringing new beings to the planet after the tree was planted, to see if they could be fed upon and thus allow more trees to grow. Turles had been delighted with the idea, imagining a few colony worlds, each with a few members of the Crusher Corps guarding them, constantly being filled with slaves that would have their energy drained to produce more fruit. But nothing had happened and Lakasei had smugly told his brother that clearly the Tree of Might adapted to the planet, growing to only consume life that had a deep connection to the planet.

‘It makes sense,’ Turles thought to himself as he floated over to one of the branches and ran his hands along the leaves. Healthy and strong. A good sign. ‘After all, the tree doesn’t affect any of us with the same slow drain it does others. A build up of minerals in one’s body, from spending at least a decade or more on a planet eating its food, that is what allows them to be identified by the Tree to determine that they should be drained.’

Thus they were forced to be very careful with the Seeds of Might, making sure that when they planted them they fully had control of the situation. The Tree had to be protected, as even when fully grown it could be destroyed. And they couldn’t hit worlds that people would notice disappearing quickly, lest they attract the attention of Frieza. The last thing Turles wanted was for that annoying bastard to realize what he was up to and decide that he wanted to take the Tree of Might for himself. No… Frieza would only learn of what Turles was doing when he was strong enough to crush him with a single hand.

‘And that will be a while,’ he thought darkly.

It was a balancing act. His men all know about the tree and longed for a chance to sample its fruit. Turles needed to remain stronger than them so they didn’t think of trying to usurp him. But he couldn’t prolong them forever, as they would become just as angry if he did that. Amond and Daiz had sampled the fruit once already and Rasin and Lakasei had been brought back with it… he supposed it was time for Cacao to have some. He had been able to put him off by pointing out that they didn’t know how his cybernetics would react to an increase of strength but with Rasin and Lakasei now part of their group, able to upgrade the cyborg’s systems, that excuse wouldn’t fly.

‘Two pieces…’ he thought idly. ‘Two pieces would solve my problem. One for Cacao, one for me. Just to ensure that I stay a few steps ahead of them. Then Amond and Daiz again, then Rasin and Lakasei… I need to be careful with them. They are smart… if they get too strong they will figure out a way to take control even if my power level is-‘

“Sir!” Amond suddenly said via the comm unit in Turles’ modified scouter (stripped of anything that Frieza could have used to find him). “The proximity alarms we set up have detected forces moving on our location.”

That made Turles smirk. “Well, it seems like the dogs have some fight still in them. You know what to do, Amond: maim and break. I want them alive… but that doesn’t mean their existence needs to be pleasant.”

“Understood!” Amond declared and Turles smirked as he heard him sign off.

‘Perhaps I should join them… its been a while since I’ve truly stretched my muscles and it would be interesting to see how those mutts react to me.’ He longed for a good battle; it had been over two years since he’d truly gotten a fight that actually challenged him and his warrior’s soul screaming for a chance to cut loose and test himself. Yet at the same time he didn’t want to leave the Tree of Might unattended. The problem with the Tree was that it produced its fruit suddenly. One could stare at a spot, blink their eyes, and suddenly find the fruit there. It blossomed within seconds… and only once. A crop grew only a single time. They had never found a planet that could support it growing a second batch of fruit, even if the planet still had life on it. It simply took too much and waiting for another crop always meant watching everything die and then the tree itself before a piece of fruit was made.

He knew the tree was very close to bearing fruit and Turles hated the idea of leaving it when it was so near to producing its bounty. Because when it was done that meant that he could begin planning for their next trip. The number of fruit it produced would determine much, after all. Two and he could risk being a bit more daring. One and he would have to be conservative. Three and well… well, a Saiyan could dream, couldn’t he?

‘It also means that I can tell my men to finally stop holding back, so we might wipe the planet clean,’ he thought as he felt the first stages of the battle begin. He was surprised by the explosions he was hearing… he hadn’t thought the dogs were that strong and he knew his men wouldn’t be foolish enough to forget his warning. He touched his scouter and frowned. The power levels were… surprisingly high. ‘Where were you hiding these fighters, I wonder!’ he thought to himself. ‘You certainly didn’t have them when you first confronted me. They-‘

“Sir!” Daiz said over the intercom. “You must come at once!”

“And why is that?” Turles asked, amused. The warrior wouldn’t be calling for him if it wasn’t important… he was far too prideful to waste his time.

“Three of the warriors… they have tails like yours! And one looks exactly like you save for pinkish tan skin!”

Turles frowned at that, looking at his hand. ‘Looks like me…’ His skin had become a touch gray thanks to an earlier experiment to try and increase his power level. Turles had never been satisfied with being trapped as a Low Class warrior and that frustration had only grown into a full hatred when his stupid sister had married Bardock. While he had been occasionally compared to the rising star in the Frieza Force thanks to the marriage all anyone could bring up was how amazing Bardock was, how thrilled he must be that their lines were merged… and how he was just an afterthought. ‘They discussed their children as if-‘

He froze.

“Daiz!” he snapped, turning away from the Tree. “Describe the three with tails, NOW!”

“I… sir?”

“The tails, damn you! What do their tails look like?” He forced himself not to rush towards the battle, not wanting to let on how worried he was. Because he wasn’t. At all. He wasn’t worried. ‘It can’t be him. There is simply no possible way it is him. I would have heard if he were alive!’ But even as he thought that his mind turned to the dark possibility that Lord Frieza may have managed to save a few Saiyans from the destruction of their planet just to use them for his own secret needs. He knew that there had been a few left alive after the meteor had struck Planet Vegeta but there were always whispers of more. ‘What if he survived? What if he survived and went into hiding, disguised so that Lord Frieza could send him after his enemies?’ He had known, despite it appearing that Lord Frieza had given up bringing him in, that the tyrant would never accept his defection lying down. Yes, he had lied to the troops and told them he was dead but after that there had still be the odd Frieza Force member that had come to take him in that he had reduced to dust. That had stopped about ten years ago but still…

No. Daiz had to be mistaken. These creatures would have dog-like tails or cat-like ones and he would explain to Daiz exactly what the species was (for a Prince of a race now dead, thanks to his own hand, Daiz was rather sheltered in the ways of the universe) and they would decide what to do with them. That was all. They-

“Like yours, sir!” Daiz said only for a crackle to fill the intercom. “Not all of them… most of them appear to be humanoid… there are two small ones and a robot but- is that a Namekian!?!”

Turles heard Amond call out something about a triclops.

“The tails, Daiz,” Turles snarled. “What do their tails look like?”

“Uh… like yours, sir. Brown. Fuzzy.”

Saiyan tails.

“Describe them. Now.”

“The female is of average height. Young… mid twenties. Blue outfit. Black hair but I can’t tell length because she has it-“

“The males,” Turles said. ‘Its not Gine,’ he thought. ‘Too tall.’ His sister had been an utter runt, not even reaching 5 feet. Unless she had magically gone through puberty again then the Saiyan female wasn’t her. The age was wrong too. ‘If it is Bardock then it might be a daughter…’

“The one that looks like you… uh… looks like you?” Daiz said, for once not sounding utterly dignified. Turles let out a bitter huff at that, an even more bitter smile forming on his lips. He had walked right into that one, hadn’t it? “The other one is more muscular and has… the longest hair I’ve ever seen. It reaches down to his ankles. Older than the one that looks like you but only a few years-“

“Raditz,” Turles whispered, cutting Daiz off.

“Sir?”

“Fight hard, Daiz, I’ll be there soon.” And with that he switched off the comm unit and thought of what he had just learned. ‘I had heard you lived, nephew… and at last I find you again. Bardock’s heir.’ He ran his tongue along his teeth, feeling the sharp spots scraping against it as his heart began to beat a touch faster. ‘Oh… so you have come to find me, have you? Or perhaps you didn’t even realize I was here.’ He remembered Bardock once gruffly commenting that he if he had a child he would make sure they knew to stay far, far away from the likes of Turles. ‘Time to show why he was right.’

And with that he began to leisurely fly towards the battle.

~MC~MC~MC~

Yamcha glanced over at Isco as the two of them battled the cyborg warrior that had confronted them. He could hear the others fighting and hoped they were doing okay because they were having problems. Despite the advantage the two had in terms of numbers the cyborg was still lightning quick, making it feel like THEY were the ones that were outnumbered. And the fact that the cyborg liked to do close and wide range fighting, and switch up which style it went with, made it harder for Yamcha to fall into a groove.

‘And there there’s Kayos’ warning,’ he thought. The mage had warned Yamcha not to use the Kaio-Ken unless it was life or death. ‘We only have a limited number of Senzu Beans and there are no hospitals around that understand humans. Chichi is getting better at healing but she still might not be strong enough to help me out if I really mess myself up.’ He shook his head in annoyance. ‘That leaves the Spirit Bomb… but that will take too long to charge and even then I’m not sure there is enough energy on this planet for me to draw from it… I could end up finishing the job that Tree started!’

So instead he used every other move he had learned and augmented under King Kai’s training. How to punch something with ten times the force he actually put into it, so that they felt all the damage while he felt none. How to move so quick he could get in two blows for their one. How to take a hit and turn it into the momentum needed to take down his foe. All of this he did.

And it was still doing little.

“You know,” Isco stated and how Yamcha hated how calm he was. How his voice didn’t waiver. The benefits of being a machine, he supposed. “I rather think I hate you.”

The cyborg didn’t say a word.

“You take all the strengths of a machine and steal it for your fleshy self. You are, quite simply, a thief. And I do not like thieves.” His right arm rotated and twisted and Yamcha let out a yelp when it turned into a sword. But not a smooth one like a katana or a broad sword. No… it was one covered in nasty looking teeth. “So, in the name of all machine life… I believe I will take what you have stolen back.”

He lunged and the cyborg brought up his arm, easily catching the blow. While it didn’t show on its… face?... thanks to much of it being covered in metal, Yamcha got the sense the cyborg was feeling smug.

And then there was a whirling sound and Yamcha realized that the sword wasn’t a sword.

It was a chainsaw.

“SHIT!” he shouted, leaping back as sparks flew and the cyborg let out a garbled scream as the saw began to cut through his metal arm.

“Let us find the fleshy bits you have hidden away!” Isco said, sounding rather manic as he hacked off the cyborg’s arm. It wasn’t a clean cut either. No… it was violent and destructive and had Yamcha wincing even if it was happening to his opponent. Even if the cyborg was attacking the planet and helping to drain it of all its energy and probably had done it a thousand times-

Yamcha blinked.

‘Why did I feel sorry for him again?’

The next moment proved that he shouldn’t worry about the cyborg at all… because it turned its head and fired off a beam of energy from its eye, striking Yamcha in the chest and rewarding his lapse of focus with a burn along his pecs.

“Was that supposed to distract me, blasphemy?” Isco asked as he easily spun around and tried to drive his saw into the cyborg’s belly. But the alien dodged, leaping far enough away so he could begin firing on Isco, forcing him to be the one that was shifting and moving to avoid hits. “I’m afraid you are mistaken. Kill him, see what I care.”

“Hey!” Yamcha exclaimed.

“You died once before!” Isco retorted.

“That has nothing to do with anything!” he snapped. “How would you like it if I said YOU should die?”

“I would hate it but there is a key difference.”

“And that is?”

Isco revved his saw.

“I’m me.”

Yamcha rolled his eyes at that. “Right…” He cracked his neck and went back onto the attack.

~MC~MC~MC~

“How interesting, Lakesei,” Rasin said as he looked over at Bulma and her power armor. “It appears she is making up for her weakness by using machines. Similar to Cacao.”

“Similar, I suppose,” Lakesei stated even as he dodged a blast Chiaotzu fired at him. “But not quite. Advantages and disadvantages.” He smirked even as his ‘brother’ chuckled. “I think I will enjoy tearing it apart!”

“Oh, so you are the smart ones,” Bulma said even as she activated the anti-grav jets in her boots, allowing her to easily avoid the punch Rasin tried to strike her with. “Every team has one. You know, I try not to be vain but I know I am one of the smartest people on my planet. Perhaps the smartest.”

“Then your planet must be filled with morons,” Lakesei taunted.

Chiaotzu chuckled at that. “You walked into that one!” He grew serious though when Rasin tried to blast him with an energy strike, quickly countering with one of his own, the two energy attacks colliding and struggling against one another before finally exploding, neither hurting the other fighter.

“But see,” Bulma said, continuing on as if she hadn’t been interrupted at all, “I’ve wondered how I would stack up against the best of the galaxy.” Her drones made their presence known, firing down to her new capsules that gave her an energy shield and a scattershot blaster. She brought up the first when Lakesei blasted at her with a flurry of ki blasts, easily blocking them, before she aimed her blaster and fired, forcing the little alien to run lest he take the full strike. Even then he still was hit by enough shots to clearly leave him feeling hurt. “I guess I’ll have to keep looking.”

“You aren’t that bright if you think that you match us in intelligence,” Lakesei taunted as he rushed in towards Bulma, forcing her to go back to her shield as he began to kick and punch her. Her suit’s Incoming Impact sensors activated the moment the first punch was thrown and Bulma found herself feeling more like a puppet than a fighter, the suit rapidly working to force her limbs into positions to block the blows. It was an odd feeling to be reacting far quicker than she realized something was wrong but she was thankful for it as otherwise she’d have had no hope against a close range fighter. “Rasin and I are the best and brightest of the Beenz race!”

“Of course the Beenz were wiped out centuries ago,” Rasin pointed out. “We are the only two left.”

“Not much of a loss,” Lakesei laughed. “Besides, I prefer it just being us… then we can-“

Bulma’s one drone fired off another capsule that shot right through Lakesei’s arm, causing the little warrior to cry out in pain as Bulma added the new capsule to her scattershot blaster, now giving her the option to switch to electro nets. She smirked as she fired, Chiaotzu spinning Rasin into Lakesei, the two hitting just as the net came at them…

…only for the two to merge into one, allowing the net to miss them before they separated.

“Heheheheh,” the two giggled as one.

“Alright,” Bulma admitted, “this might be harder than I thought.”

~MC~MC~MC~

“You’re both tough,” the warrior, Amond, said with a grin as he dodged a kick from Raditz before moving to try and strike Goku. It didn’t work, as the Saiyan easily caught his fist with his hand, and for his efforts Amond was struck right in the gut. But the alien merely smirked at that, barely wincing from the blow. “But… I’m tougher.”

‘He’s right,’ Raditz thought to himself even as he tried to get behind Amond so he could drill the back of his knee. Even if they were flying such a strike with be crippling, not allowing him to use the leg for attacks. And the pain would distract him greatly. But Amond saw what he was doing and dropped down right before Raditz landed the hit; it was a testimony to Goku’s speed and skill that he was able to get out of the way of the blow that had suddenly shifted towards him. ‘These guys ARE tough… but it feels… unnatural.’ Raditz glowered. ‘They must have consumed the Fruit of the Tree of Might. Their power isn’t solely their own and that’s why they feel slightly off.’

Amond let out a savage roar of delight as he brought down both his fists in an attempt to crush Goku’s back. But Radtiz’s brother slipped away and was able to kick Amond right in the face.

Once again… it barely fazed him.

It wasn’t that he was stronger than them. No… Raditz could tell that Amond was probably around their power level. The problem was that Raditz, and the rest of the group he had sided with, were strangers in a strange land and as such had to be more cautious. They couldn’t go all out.

‘Chichi is getting better with healing and we have a bag of senzu beans,’ he thought, thinking of the wonderful injury-curing greens. ‘But its not like having a full hospital or a healing pod. If I get hurt here I can’t run off to the Frieza Station and get patched up. And we have no idea what is awaiting us on Namek. It could be a planet full of peaceful green villagers… or it could be full of warriors like Senza, ready to attack us for arriving at their home. Hell, we don’t even know WHY Senza and Slug were sent from their home planet… Senza only has vague information from the ship about a drought.’ That made Raditz scowl. ‘Damn it… I hate going in without information! It means I can’t cut loose and now we have this bastard-‘

Amond suddenly wasn’t there and Raditz cursed his distraction, whipping around only to get a punch in the side. He was glad that he at least was able to absorb the blow as much as Amond did, merely smirking even if his ribs howled in protest. He’d need to check them over when they were done… hopefully Chichi would be able heal them up nice and quick.

“I’m kind of glad I got the two of you,” Amond stated. “I mean sure, fucking jealous of Daiz getting the Namekian… I’ve heard their real hard fighters and I’d love to test myself against one of them but still… glad I got you.” He leaned in and hissed with a grin, “I’ve only gotten to take on one Saiyan before… always been curious if he was the exception or the rule.”

“One… Saiyan?” Raditz said, startled.

“Yes, one,” a voice called out. Snide. Arrogant. Full of brash bravado. So similar to his own. To Vegeta. To Nappa. It was an attitude, he had come to realize, that could only be gained from growing up on Planet Vegeta. Goku certainly didn’t have it, nor Chichi. And Gohan… well, he doubted that boy would ever have such words pass through his lips.

Raditz slowly turned his head and stared at the new arrival.

“Hey!” Goku said as all the fighting came to a stop with the appearance of a new and rather powerful fighter. “He DOES look a lot like me!”

Raditz swallowed at that. He… he had hoped that the Pleists were just bigots that couldn’t tell one alien apart from the other. But now… now…

“Come now, nephew,” the new arrival said, “is that any way to greet your long lost uncle?”

“Uncle?” Goku said, confused. “Wait, we have an uncle?”

“We have a madman related to us through our mother,” Raditz hissed.

“Madman, am I? So cruel.” He turned towards Goku. “Well well well… it seems my sister spread her legs more than once for that bastard Bardock. You’d think I’d be pleased you so resemble me, nephew… but I know his bothersome blood runs through your veins.” He pressed a hand to his chest. “As for who I am? I am your uncle, Turles, leader of the Crusher Corps.” He smirked. “Feel free to bow.”

Goku though narrowed his eyes. “So… you’re the one that brought the Tree of Might to this planet?”

“No interest in discussing family?” Turles asked, still hovering above them, looking down at them with utter smugness. Raditz hated how Turtles was just hanging there, staring at them like ants. It reminded him far too much of Frieza. “Or perhaps asking how I faked my death? Why I never came for you or Raditz? Well, with you that is simple: I didn’t know you existed. Not exactly close to the family.”

Goku though merely shook his head. “I’d only be willing to talk if you stopped your attack on this planet.”

“Oh, we have a HERO!” Turles mocked. His face twisted into a dark grin. “And what a hero. Bardock would be ashamed.”

“Perhaps you’ll get to ask him in Hell,” Kayos suddenly called out. Raditz had wondered where the asshole had disappeared to; he had refused to tell them what he was doing, leaving them to fight. Raditz had assumed he just didn’t want another power boost of good magic from saving a planet. The idiot was weird like that, not wanting to get too strong. Dumbass.

Turles turned and saw Kayos floating far out with one hand behind his back, Chichi hovering just beside him. Gohan had been left with a few of the Pleists, told to protect the pups that the survivors were watching over while being protected just as much himself. That had freed up Chichi to serve as Kayos’ bodyguard, as it were. Why he still didn’t know… again, the bastard had been utterly silent.

‘This better be fucking worth it,’ Raditz thought.

“One day I will,” Turles said. “But it won’t be today. Today I am going to wipe the line of Bardock off the map.” He stared at Chichi. “Oh, did he have a daughter too?”

Chichi wrinkled her nose. “No. I’m Goku’s-“

“She’s with me,” Kayos said, cutting her off. “And you should be focused on me. Because I’m about to take a massive shit aaaaaalllllll over your plans, Turles.”

The gray-skinned Saiyan chuckled at that. “Oh? Is that so?”

“Oh yes. See… I have a bit of a problem. I’ve done a whole lot of good recently and that’s left me… well… in a bit of an imbalance.”

“Being heroic does that,” Turles retorted.

Kayos merely shrugged. “And I have been trying to figure out what evil thing I could do to balance that out. And then… it occurred to me.”

He pulled his hand out and Turles froze, eyes widened in shock.

“…no,” Turles whispered. But then his face became stony and he braced, ready to launch himself at Kayos.

The man squished the strange orangish red fruit in his hand and Turles stopped in his tracks.

“Now now… if you startle me I might crush it,” he warned.

“Give it to me, you bastard.”

“What is that?” Goku hissed.

Raditz frowned. “I think… that’s the Fruit of the Tree of Might.”

Kayos kept holding the fruit. “You need this, don’t you? The tree only produced a single fruit… only one there is. You REALLY need this one or all this was for nothing, wasn’t it?” He looked about. “Almost all this planet’s energy for a simple piece of fruit.”

Turtles… smirked.

“I like you. You have balls. And the Crusher Corps could use a man like you.” He began to inch forward. “That one is earmarked for someone else but the next one? I would be more than willing to share it. I think we might make a great team.” He continued to move closer, holding out his hand, trying to either convince Kayos to go with his plan or take him off guard when he rushed into battle to take the fruit… and most likely his head.

“Good idea!” Kayos proclaimed. “Better one. You know what would be oh so terribly evil?”

He narrowed his eyes.

“Stealing fruit grown with this planet’s energy… and instead of finding some way to heal the planet with it… doing this.”

And with that Kayos chomped down on the fruit.

“Kayos!” Chichi shouted, it clear she had NOT expected him to do that. Juice dribbled down his chin as he bit savagely into the fruit, tearing it apart in a way that would make any Saiyan proud.

But none of the Saiyans watching were feeling pride.

Chichi was horrified. Goku confused. Raditz startled.

Turles screamed and rushed him.

“Ya might wanna back up!” Kayos roared viciously, eyes sparking with dark magic as his body began to process the power of the Fruit of Might. Turles was struck by one pulsing wave and was sent flying into the roots of the Tree of Might. Kayos didn’t seem to notice, Chichi hastily flying away from him as he doubled over, mouth twisting into a wild sneer, eyes wide in madness. Raditz dimly remembered Fortune Teller Baba telling them that Kayos’ body naturally turned ki into magic and-

“DOWN!” he shouted even as Kayos threw back his head, dark magic exploding out and flying across the battlefield.

Chapter Text

Power surges sucked.

Anime and video games had made people believe they were the greatest things in the world. That they felt like the best drug trip ever (not that I even know what THAT was like… I was unstable enough as it was just on my happy little lonesome) and were utterly addictive. The evil villain who would find a way to gain more strength and power and would shudder with pleasure as it filled their bodies, nearly orgasmic in what the sensation did to them.

If someone paid attention though they would see that, at least in Dragon Ball, power ups were not all sugar highs and blowjobs.

Goku, Vegeta, Gohan, and all the rest had to focus in order to tap into their power. Become tense and determined to dig at the strength within and bring it to the surface. Oh, going Super Saiyan became easier once they achieved that level but getting there? Those weren’t happy giggles coming out of their mouths. No… they were screams of exertion. Ones of stress and pain and reaching deep into one’s self to drag up something. And more than that one was altering their entire body, forcing it to expand to hold that power that was far greater than what they were ever meant to hold.

So as my body naturally converted the KI energy the Fruit of Might, turning it into Evil Magic thanks to me ignoring my friends and their battles and focusing only on myself… my “reward” was pain.

‘Evil Magic and Good Magic aren’t supposed to work together,’ I thought as my nerves finally began to stop screaming at me, allowing me to focus on what was happening around me… as well as what had just happened to my body. ‘They are supposed to be in conflict… warring with each other. It is why when a mage begins down one path they STICK with that path.’ It was an utterly flawed statement when it came to the nature of human evil but Yoda’s comments about the Dark Side DID ring true when it came to magic: once upon the path of darkness, or light, forever would it dominate your destiny.

And me, being a fucking idiot motivated by a scroll, had decided, “Nah, I can be the first to do it.”

It reminded me of our dog Sammy and our cat Ellen, when they had first met. Sammy had attacked Ellen… who fought right back. DEMANDING Sammy respect her. The Evil Magic the Fruit of Might had just granted me was massive… but I had also just saved Earth twice and had reserves upon reserves of Good Magic in my body. The light saw the dark approaching and smirked before rising up to smack it down, thinking that it would be easy. But the Evil Magic was just as determined to take root and as such the two collided like sumo wrestlers in my gut.

“Fuck,” I gasped as Evil Magic slithered along my skin, clinging to me like glue, only to give way to points of Good Magic that exploded out of sections of my body like volcanoes. “Fuck!” I cursed again before I grit my teeth and willed both sets of magic to settle the fuck down. I felt the muscles in my neck straining, veins bulging out as I fought with all I had against, well, myself.

But… finally… both halves of magic settled down, managing to curl up within me without actually touching each other.

“Not… quite what the Scroll was saying would happen,” I muttered to myself, flexing my fingers before looking out at the battlefield. “Oh… hey.”

“…you are in trouble now!” Yamcha declared, thrusting his fist into the air before pointing right at me. “Kayos is going to make  you wish you’d never come to this planet!”

“Yeah but… no,” I said, hating that I had to burst his bubble.

“…what?”

But rather than answer I instead did the only thing I COULD do.

I left.

~MC~MC~MC~

“Where… where is he going!?!?” Bulma shouted.

“We can focus on him later!” Chiaotzu cried out as Turles slowly raised his head up after being sent into the Tree of Might, eyes blazing with rage.

“Kill them all…” he hissed before throwing back his head, his KI energy raging around him. “KILL THEM ALL!”

“Right!” Rasin declared, rushing at Chiaotzu even as Turles took off, Raditz and Goku giving chase after him even as Tien and a recovered Chichi moved to take on their opponent. “You just signed your death warrants!”

Bulma though glowered as her drones fired off more capsules that attached themselves to her armor, giving her a secondary pair of robotic arms that had laser blasters attached to them while her main arms had swords. “I just suddenly found myself not having any time for you!” she snapped as she went on the attack. “So I need to take you out quickly!”

Chiaotzu went after Lakesei, allowing Bulma to focus on Rasin. The strange alien was very quick but the AI in her suit was working to help her compensate for that, quickly alerted her to any suddenly movements and using prediction algorithms to figure out where he might go next. That was the beauty of her latest battle armor: it was self learning. Able to study an opponent and learn just what they liked to do. Everyone had patterns… Master Roshi had taught her that. Things they liked to fall back on. A great fighter learned how to break out of those habits but that didn’t mean they weren’t there… they were just better at not falling back on the tried and trued. But Rasin wasn’t and-

Bulma smirked as one of her lasers hit its mark and Rasin found himself without a foot.

“You insolent little brat!” the alien screamed before launching himself at her… only to stop short when Chiaotzu suddenly swapped power sets with Tien and activated Witches Style. Lakesei didn’t even have a chance to cry out before Chiaotzu grew his extra set of arms and drove them right into his face, shattering his eye sockets. “Lakesei!” Rasin called out in horror.

“Worry about yourself!” Bulma shouted as she flew in close, thrusting her right arm…

…and impaling the alien through the gut.

Bulma’s eyes went wide.

Rasin slowly looked down at his belly before raising his head up, a trickle of dark blood slowly rolling down his lip and onto his chin.

“At least… Lakesei… still… lives…” he got out, Bulma having a front row seat to the alien’s eyes glazing over, the spark leaving them as his body sagged.

“I… I didn’t…” she got out as she ripped the blade from the small alien’s body. She turned just in time to see Chiaotzu fire a Dodon Ray that reduced Lakesei to ashes.

“Bulma!” Chiaotzu called out. “Come on, we have to help the others.”

“…yeah,” Bulma said, shaken as she stared at her sword, still covered in the thick black blood of the last of the Beenz.

~MC~MC~MC~

Chichi and Tien floated in the air, cautious as they eyed up Amond. Tien had been staying out of the fight at the start, allowing Chiaotzu to go in while he studied up their foes and tried to figure out just what moves they might have that would cause them problems. But he had found that most of them just got by on brute strength. No flashing or shocking moves that could suddenly take a battle and twist it on its head. No strange abilities that would force the gang to strategize on the fly how to deal with them. Just kicks, punches, and ki blasts. It was… it was honestly a touch refreshing.

And, if he could be honest, a wonderful reminder that they ALL had grown stronger.

‘When we took on the Saiyans they had so much control during that fight,’ he thought to himself, glancing over to make sure everyone else was doing okay. Bulma and Chiaotzu were moving to help Krillin and Senza against their fighter, though he saw that Bulma seemed slightly… off. Nothing too great but clearly something had rattled her, based on her body language; he made a mental note to check in on her after the battle. ‘Against Slug’s forces we did a lot better but… it felt like that might be a one-off thing. That we actually hadn’t developed as much as we thought we had.’ He smirked as he watched Isco and Yamcha finish up with Cacao, the droid tearing through the cyborg in a shower of sparks. ‘But seeing us being able to stand and hold our own against these guys?’

He wasn’t deluding himself though… their opponents WERE stronger than they were. The difference though was that the Z Fighters simply had the better numbers. Chichi, Tien, and Kayos had been able to do their own things while the others fought, swapping in fresh. That meant something… it was hard enough to fight 2 on 1 but to know that your opponent could suddenly change to someone fresh? That made fights near impossible to win.

‘Well… some of us swapped in,’ he thought darkly as he glanced in the direction Kayos had flown in. “Did you know he was going to do that?” he asked Chichi.

“I certainly did not!” the woman said darkly, eyes narrowed. “He and I will be having a LONG discussion about his actions when this is over.”

“I get why he did it…” Tien began before shaking his head. “But I don’t like him keeping secrets… or risking this planet.”

“I want to hear his reasoning beyond “I wanted to be stronger” before I pass judgment.”

“Heheh,” their opponent, Amond, chuckled as he finally decided he’d gotten his second wind. “You two really don’t get it, do you? That bastard just did what everyone else in the universe does: care about himself.”

“You don’t know him,” Chichi charged.

“Oh, but I do,” Amond taunted. “I know him better than you know him… or maybe even he knows himself. I understand why he did that. If I had the chance I would have done the same damn thing!” He narrowed his eyes. “That’s okay though… I’ll find a way to rip that power right out of his corpse! And I’ll stack his dead body up alongside yours!”

He rushed forward and Tien narrowed his eyes, using Chiaotzu’s psychic powers to grab a massive chunk of wood from the Tree of Might and heave it into Amond’s path. The warrior though crashed through it, though it did distract him long enough for Chichi and him to fall into better defensive stances.

‘As much as I don’t want to consider it… there is a chance this bastard is right,’ Tien thought. ‘Kayos has watched us all grow stronger… he’s gotten so much better with his magic but its all about trickery and misdirection for him.’ The man had always acted fine about it but Tien had his doubts. ‘If it were me and everyone around me kept getting strong and more powerful and all I could do was perform some tricks… I’d want to find a way to bridge the gap myself. Did he truly do this because it would help all of us in the long run? Or was it just him being selfish?’

Avo Kayos would have a lot of explaining to do when this was over.

~MC~MC~MC~

“You are going to pay for what he did!” Daiz declared darkly as he moved in to try and punch Krillin’s head off. “That Fruit was meant for us! And the seed-“

Krillin blocked the blow quickly and spun a kick into the fighter’s side, causing him to stagger. “That fruit was meant for no one! It nearly destroyed this planet!”

“Who cares about these filthy mongrels?” Daiz asked mockingly. “If they were truly worth it, had a reason to exist, they would have been able to drive us off! But they didn’t… which is why they are going to die on this rock!”

“Not if you die first!” Krillin declared, firing off one of his Destructo Discs.

But Daiz, having already gotten several nasty slashes from Krillin’s previous Destructo Disc attacks, blasted towards Senza, forcing Krillin to mentally pull the discs away, so that they didn’t chop his new friend into pieces. Of course that put him in the range of Senza who responded by launching a series of kicks and punches at the alien warrior, forcing him to dodge.

“You are almost as strong as Turles,” Daiz replied before he managed to get under one of Senza’s blows and deliver and strike to Senza’s ankle, causing the Namekian to curse in pain before he lifted his hand and fired a ki blast that had the warrior shooting up. “Almost.” He turned to Krillin and coated both is hands in Ki. “And why should I care about these mongrels? They are nothing to me… little more than pathetic mutts who yipped and barked before scurrying away.”

“Because its right,” Krillin retorted even as he batted away one of the Ki blasts that Daiz fired at him.

“And who decides right and wrong?” Daiz challenged. “The one that is the strongest, that’s who. It has always been that way and it always will be. My family ruled our planet… I was destined to be a king. But then Turles arrived and within an hour subjugated us all. When he asked me to join him I could have been like my brothers and snarled that he had no right… and I would have ended up dead, like them. I understood at once that his might meant he ruled… and I have never looked back.” He smirked at that. “You might think me weak-willed… I think of myself as the one that is going to survive. Had these dogs actually decided to do the smart thing and submitted to us the strongest of them would have been allowed to serve within the Crusher Corps. But they decided that it was better to fight… and now they will die on this barren husk while you, their foolish ‘champions’, will be little more than a tale we tell at feasts! A mockery!

“Do you realize yet how hopeless this crusade is, bald man? How you have no hope of defeating us? We are the Crusher Corps, the mightiest warriors in the universe! Do you not see that your right and wrong are mere illusions that have no standing on us? And how-“

Daiz cried out when explosions ripped across his body.

“What I see,” Sennen stated, her gun still smoking even as the rest of her resistance cell raised their weapons, “is that someone forgot that sometimes the ‘dogs’ bite back!”

And with that her forces opened fire on Daiz, causing him to scream.

~MC~MC~MC~

Turles snarled as his pestering nephew blasted towards him. “I don’t have time for the likes of you!” he roared as he twisted around and fired off a Ki blast at the long haired Saiyan. But Raditz merely dodged the blow and continued on and Turles realized that there was no hope of avoiding this fight. ‘Which means that blond bastard is getting further away!’ he cursed. ‘He has the fucking seed with him… if I don’t get a hold of it then I have no hope of being able to grow another Tree of Might. The one we found the very first time is long dead by now and the other ones must have been reduced to husks as well. That seed is my last chance!’

“Why are you fleeing, Uncle?” Raditz demanded, firing off two ki blasts from his hand. “Don’t you wish to know what we’ve been up to?”

“Not in the slightest,” Turles snapped. “I had hoped that you would have died along with your parents when that meteor destroyed our planet!”

“At least my father attempted to protect Planet Vegeta!” Raditz shouted even as his brother moved to aid him.

“Raditz is right,” the younger Saiyan said. “All you do is destroy planets.”

“And you think Bardock was any different?” Turles taunted. “What tales have you been filling your brother’s head with, Raditz?” Turles dodged another Ki blast and moved in quickly, slamming his head into Raditz’s face. He wasn’t sure if he broke the boy’s nose or not but it still felt good to crack his skull against the other Saiyan’s face. Raditz fell back and Turles grabbed onto his arm, twisting it and hurling the long haired Saiyan right into the ground below. “Did he regale you with tales of the noble Bardock? The hero of the galaxy? Well, allow me to tell you, boy, that your father was a monster. No different than me. The blood of millions coated his hands and he never bothered to wash it away. He slaughtered all in his path and he ENJOYED it.”

The younger Saiyan though… didn’t really react to that.

“Or maybe he did tell you and you just don’t care,” Turles taunted.

“No,” his nephew said, “I care… but only in the fact that I wish he hadn’t have done that. Just like I wish you’d stop trying to hurt this planet and its people.”

That made Turles throw back his head and laugh. “Bardock!” he roared. “If only you could see from whatever hell you are suffering from what your lineage has become! Your youngest is an idealistic fool!” He cackled at that even as the younger Saiyan narrowed his eyes and Turles let out an amused sigh. “Dreamers don’t last long in this galaxy… before your birth it was your own father that snuffed them out. Now?” he held up a glowing hand. “Its me.”

“Maybe that’s the way it used to be,” the younger Saiyan replied. “But not anymore.”

“Oh, what a delusional champion you are!” Turles taunted before launching another attack right at his nephew’s determined little face. He grinned as the boy’s head snapped back but he didn’t let him get too far away, instead grabbing onto his shoulders and forcing him to bend down so he could drive his knee right into his gut. “Your father will have words for you when you meet him in the hellfire.” With that he socked Bardock’s annoying spawn across the jaw, sending him crashing to the ground. “What a legacy you have made, Bardock!” Turles taunted even as Raditz raced up to face him. “Your pathetic children, dying at my hands!”

“The only pathetic bastard here is you!” Raditz snarled as he slammed his shoulder into Turles. The older Saiyan winced at that but didn’t let it drive him too far back and instead moved to grab onto Raditz only for the warrior to zip away. “You will submit, Uncle!”

“Oh, is that what you think will happen? You think for even a moment I care about the old ways?” He threw back his head and laughed. “I will never submit. And just to save you the trouble, Raditz? If you try that bullshit on me I will make your death be a slow one!”

Raditz snarled and fired off several rapid ki blasts. “And you call  yourself a Saiyan!?! Where is your pride!?”

“Saiyan Pride… a fancy term made by the elite of our world in order to keep them on top-“ He suddenly blasted forward, driving his foot into Raditz’s shoulder, “-and us on the bottom. It’s why I left, boy. I refused to play the game. The Saiyans had lost their way… I was the only one to understand what we truly were… what we needed to be! We were not a society of kings and families and organization. We were nomads and warriors, fighting to bring into our warbonds the bestand dooming all the rest. King Vegeta wanted order… to make us respectful. We never were. We are evil bastards, each and every one of us, who take what we want and do not care for rules and laws and bonds of family or friendship! Frieza and Vegeta and Bardock prevented me from having those and I swore to reclaim them!” he took a breath, smiling smugly. “I wanted to be free… and now I am. While you lap at Frieza’s piss water and call it nectar I live as our ancestors did… as a true Saiyan.”

“I don’t work for Frieza. Not since I learned the truth.”

“And what truth is that?”

“He’s the one that destroyed Planet Vegeta. Not that meteorite.”

Turles paused.

“My father learned the truth, that Frieza wanted to kill the entire Saiyan race. To wipe us out completely because he feared our power. He stood against Frieza and fought to save our planet-“

“And he failed,” Turles said with a wide grin. “Oh… what a legacy for my dear Brother-In-Law… to fail when it mattered most! To be unable to do a thing. And now his sons will die and his failure will be complete!”

“You care so little for your people? Your world?”

“Raditz… the fact that I haven’t even bothered to learn your brother’s name should tell you how little I care about our people and what they became.” He rocketed into Raditz who responded by firing off a volley of ki blasts but Turles merely smacked them away, slamming into him and wrapping his arms around his nephew’s middle and squeezing hard. “You don’t matter. Your brother doesn’t matter. The only person I have ever cared about is myself! The Last of the Saiyan race! The only True Saiyan left in the universe! And now you’ll-“

Turles let out a cry of pain as the younger of Bardock’s brats drove themselves up into him, driving a fist right into his belly. His arms spasmed from the strike and he released Raditz who answered his earlier attack by slamming his fists into either side of Turles’ head. Dazed, Turles tried to swing out and grab Raditz or his brother only for the two to drive their fists down, slamming him towards the earth. He groaned and shook his head, snarling as he looked up to see the Sons of Bardock looking down upon him.

“And that’s why you are going to die here, Uncle,” Raditz declared, charging up his ki around his hands, his little brother pulling his arms off to his side, energy gathering around his fingers. “Because you never had anyone to rely upon. Never had any THING to rely upon.”

“I rely upon myself!” Turles roared in defiance. “I am the only true Saiyan, boys! The only one that understands the might of the Saiyan Race! It should have been me leading our people, not Vegeta and certainly not Bardock! I would have slayed Frieza and all his kind had it not been for your father and him standing in my way! Now then… let us see who is right in the only way that matters!” He threw his hands back behind his head, gathering his own ki. “THE ONLY WAY THAT MATTERS! THE SAIYAN WAY! CALAMITY-!”

“Double Sunday!” Raditz roared.

“Kamehameha!” his brother shouted.

“BLASTER!”

The three beams struck together and an orb of light began to form where they hit. Raditz and his brother snarled and roared out their rage and for a moment Turles almost felt… respect… for them. That they were showing their strength and their power. But he dismissed the ghost of those feelings from his mind and focused instead on pushing more and more of his power into the blast, forcing it to move slowly towards the two, driving their own attacks back at them.

“Not enough…” he snarled. “Two against one… still… not… enough-“

“RAGE OF FRYPAN!”

Turles twisted, eyes going wide as he saw the burning red ki blast launch at him.

“The female…” he whispered as he saw the Saiyan woman that had appeared with the blond thief throwing out one hand, the other bracing her arm as she sent the inferno-like ki blast at him; he shifted to try and block it but that proved to be his downfall. Turles screamed as his Calamity Buster shifted, allowing Bardock’s bastard sons to drive their own attacks into him, striking him. He screamed as he fell back-

And then he felt agonizing pain and the world went dark.

~MC~MC~MC~

 Raditz frowned as he stared at his uncle’s body.

It hadn’t been the blast that had killed him. No, that had merely driven him back into one of the great thick roots of the Tree of Might… and one of the roots that had burst from the ground. He hung there, impaled upon the great tree, head lulled to one side.

“I feel like I should… feel something,” Kakarot said as he floated down to hover next to his brother. “I mean… he was family. But I don’t feel anything.”

“Good,” Raditz said coolly. “He would never have mourned for us. Even if we had agreed with everything he said and thought he was right he still wanted us dead. He hated us because of who our father was.”

“I… I just don’t get that though!” Kakarot exclaimed. “How can he hate us if he doesn’t even know who we are?”

“People aren’t rational, brother,” Raditz snapped, wondering how ANYONE of his blood could be so naively stupid. ‘It must be Earth… it does something to people’s brains, makes them think that everything is soft and kind and that the day can be won if you just smile hard enough. No wonder he lets all these people that have tried to kill him not only live but be a part of his inner circle.’ But as soon as that thought entered his head Raditz found himself snickering. ‘Heheh, who am I to talk? Without that kindness I wouldn’t be alive. He had no idea about Saiyan submission… still really doesn’t get it. He only took me in out of kindness and family.’

Honestly Radtiz should have been thrilled by that. It meant that only he and Vegeta knew what it had meant when he submitted… and honestly it was a question if even Vegeta understood that, considering what he’d done to Nappa. It meant that Raditz was free… he could leave right at that moment and not have to worry at all about what anyone would say.

‘Except for myself,’ he thought darkly. ‘I would know that I broke my own word.’

“Still… it means one less Saiyan in the world,” Chichi commented, moving to float with them over Turles’ body.

“Some would argue that’s a good thing!” Sennan called out.

“Someone is bitter,” Raditz commented.

“You’re surprised?” Chichi asked. “Turles did nearly destroy her planet.”

“This is why I don’t leave anyone alive when I visit a world,” Raditz commented only for his brother and his wife to stare at him. “Whatever,” he said with a roll of his eyes before calling out to the dog woman, “We did your killing for you! You’re welcome!”

Sennen growled and pointed her gun right at him.

“I see why you tend to kill everyone,” Chichi said dryly.

“Thank you, I’m glad you understand!” Raditz said, pleased that at least ONE member of his newly found family finally got it. Taking off towards where they’d left the ship Raditz didn’t even spare a single glance back at Turles.

His uncle had never come looking for him.

Why should he look back at him?

~MC~MC~MC~

“So that one guy got away?” Krillin asked Tien as the rest of the gang pulled out some crates from the ship.

“Amond, I think his name was Amond,” Tien said. “And yeah… in the confusion of Goku and Raditz and Chichi taking out Turles he managed to slip away.”

“We’ll deal with him,” Radoor declared, the Pleist still annoyed that he and the rest of the freedom fighters had been reduced to support. “He was only able to match us because he had backup. Now that he’s on his own we can eliminate him.”

“If you say so,” Tien said, folding his arms over his chest. “And what about the tree?”

“If the stuff your friend is getting us works that should be handled quickly,” Dober said, sounding a bit less hostile than Radoor. Though there was an undercurrent of anger in his words and Krillin got it; after what Kayos had done he wasn’t surprised they were getting a less than warm goodbye.

“Oh, it will!” Bulma declared. “These capsules have all sorts of tools for removing trees and other plant life. Chainsaws, root killer-“

“Why did you bring all that?” Tien asked.

“You never know when you’ll need it.”

“We would need chainsaws and root killer?”

“To be fair we are using it?” Krillin said, scratching his chin.

Isco shrugged as he walked past. “I still say that we should let them all die and use this as a staging ground for the new robot empire. But I was outvoted-“

“I still say Yamcha didn’t know what he was voting for when he sided with you,” Bulma commented before turning to Dober. “These crates contain about 3 months worth of food, based on what you gave me as your population numbers. Hopefully that will be enough for you guys to work out something to help you recover from all this.”

“Appreciated,” the Pleist stated.

“And we would be willing to come back-“ Krillin began only for Radoor to growl at that. “Or not. Or not come back.”

“Good,” the old warrior snapped and the last of the Z Warriors beat a hasty retreat into the ship…

…and found Kayos sitting in the pilot chair, thumbing through a novel.

“I really should have looked this one over better before I brought it. The mystery is so obvious. The killer is-”

“KAYOS!” Bulma roared.

“No, its not me. Its actually the Turkish Diplomat.” He looked up at the others and smiled. “hey.”

Krillin stared at the blond man for a long moment before rolling his eyes. “Alright, let’s give him a chance to explain himself.”

“Explain himself!?!” Bulma shouted. “He abandoned us! “

“Also, you are giving him a second chance, man?” Yamcha asked.

Krillin shrugged. “I figured I should give him at least some time to try and explain.”

“Why would we do that?!?” Bulma exclaimed. “He left us to fight Turles after he stole the Fruit of Might!”

Kayos raised a single finger. “First off I kept Turles from eating the Fruit of the Tree of Might and dear lord whoever named any of that shit needs to be taken behind a woodshed and sodomized with a barbwire wrapped-“

“KAYOS!” Chichi cried out, covering Gohan’s ears.

“Oh, sorry about that.” He frowned. “I think I’m a bit high off of Evil Magic. Of course I’ve never been high so I don’t know what its like but still…” He shrugged. “Anyway, Turles with that would have been VERY bad. He would have handed Goku his ass easily… at best a bunch of us would have gotten hurt taking him down and remember we are very far from home at the moment so we can’t really afford to get injured.”

“He does have a point,” Tien pointed out. “We did make this entire trip to save Master Roshi. We can’t risk getting injured because that might mean having to return to earth… and that delay could cost us greatly.”

“Aw, but think about Master Roshi!” Goku declared.

“I… am,” Tien said slowly.

“I mean that he wouldn’t want us to risk others just to save himself.”

~MC~MC~MC~

“Save me!” Roshi cried out to King Kai, struggling to keep open the mouth of massive turtle he had found himself fighting against.

“But if I hurt the World Turtle it could cause a quake that could cause millions to suffer!” King Kai declared.

“Yeah but they ain’t me!”

~MC~MC~MC~

“And at worst he would have killed us all and still destroyed Pleist,” Kayos pointed out.

“That’s assuming he even got to the Fruit,” Senza pointed out.

Kayos though shot him a cool level stare. “Show of hands who thinks Goku would have let Turles eat the Fruit of Might just to see how much stronger he would have gotten?”

Everyone, including Goku, raised their hand.

“I have to admit that I’m disappointed I didn’t get a better fight out of Turles,” Goku said. “But hey, this means that Kayos is really strong now! Want to have a spar?”

“Maybe later, Nemona,” Kayos said quickly, hoping Goku would forget the promise yet also knowing that there was little chance the Saiyan Warrior would. “So me taking the Fruit was the best way to eliminate that threat.”

“But you still took it,” Bulma pointed out. “All because of this obsession with Evil Magic.”

“The Scroll-“

“I don’t care about the Scroll!” Bulma cried out. “Those people are going to suffer because of you!”

“They kill the Tree and the Planet will heal! Will replenish its energy.”

“You don’t know that!”

Kayos, getting annoyed at how she kept needling that point, finally stood up and narrowed his eyes. “I do know that.”

“How?”

“Because that’s what happened in the movie!”

That… caused Bulma to blink.

“Movie?”

“…fuck.” Kayos rolled his head back. “Ignore that.”

Chichi though spoke up. “Kayos… what movie?”

“Its nothing.”

“What are you talking about?” Chichi pressed, the others staring at him in confusion and curiosity.

“It’s nothing,” he tried to say again, only for Senza to step forward, shaking his head.

“Avo… its time you tell them the truth.”

“What truth?” Bulma pressed.

Kayos closed his eyes and took a deep breath. “Okay… so there has been-“

Before he could finish a solid white rectangle slid up from the ground in behind the group.

“What is that?” Chiaotzu exclaimed even as Goku moved to shield his family.

“I have no idea but it doesn’t look good,” Yamcha said.

“THE FIRST ROUND OF THE CONTEST HAS BEGUN! ENTER, CHAOS OF EARTH-7, ALONG WITH YOUR CHOSEN ALLY.”

“…okay, so I’m from another Earth but I wasn’t expecting this,” Kayos admitted.

“You are part of a contest, Kayos?” Goku said, eyes wide as he crouched slightly, hands balled up into fists. “Why didn’t you tell us?!? And what is the contest!?!”

“I’m not part of a contest, Goku-“

‘YOUR ALLY HAS BEEN CHOSEN! CHAOS OF EARTH-7 AND SON GOKU, ENTER THE PORTAL AND COMPLETE YOUR TASK! DEFEAT YOUR ENEMIES! SAVE THE WORLD! AND YOUR REWARD WILL BE GREAT!”

“A world to save?!?” Goku exclaimed.

“Goku!” Kayos snapped. “We need to think about this! We have no idea where this portal might lead!”

But Goku shook his head. “But Kayos, he just said that there is a world that needs to be saved. And enemies… that means there are evil villains waiting in that portal and the people they are harming NEED us to help them! We have to go!”

“Goku…”Chichi said slowly, “you can’t just go through that portal.”

“We have to, Chichi,” Goku said firmly. “Kayos and I can’t let innocent people suffer.”

“Seems to be his current mood,” Bulma declared.

“…you know what, fuck it,” Kayos marched towards the portal. “Anything is better than dealing with your bitching!”

“HEY!” Bulma screamed even as Goku kissed Chichi goodbye and patted Gohan on the head.

“We’ll catch up with you guys on Namek!”

“GOKU!” his friends cried out but the Saiyan followed after Kayos through the portal…

…and it disappeared without a trace.

~MC~MC~MC~

Amond panted, pressing his hand to the wound on his shoulder. ‘Those lousy bastards… they will suffer…’ He looked at Turles’ limp body. “Heh… and you thought-“

He didn’t get to finish… as Turles’ fingers wrapped around his throat, squeezing hard, Amond unable to even scream in agony.

“Get… us.. off… this… planet.”

THE STORY OF KAYOS AND GOKU CONTINUES

IN THE BRAND NEW FANFIC

CHAOS WARS

Arc 1: The Chaos of Three Worlds

Author’s Note: So, to explain what is happening: I have decided that Chaos Wars, a multi-year series of crossovers, will occur as its own fic. For the next roughly 16 weeks (or 8 chapters) Kayos and Goku will be out of this fic and dealing with Chaos Wars.

Now, before people begin to complain about that… the plan was always for Namek to see Goku pulled from the table so I could focus on the rest of the Z Warriors. Give Raditz, Senza, and the rest a chance to shine. Much like DBZ this works well to remove both from the board.

Arc 1 will be “The Chaos of Three Worlds” and involve Kayos and Goku, along with a few others, working together to deal with the first challenge. They will then return to this story after that on Namek and join in after that.

Chapter Text

“I still think we should wait,” Chichi said as she watched Bulma go over the controls of the ship for what felt like the tenth time. Bulma though felt better double checking everything, making sure that every bit of machinery was functioning as it should. They were 30 minutes away from landing and she didn’t want to risk having some catastrophic failure this close to the end of their journey.

‘Except it really isn’t the end, is it?’ she thought to herself as she made sure that she’d closed all the energy gatherers; the beauty of the Namekian ship was that Senza’s people had figured out how to power their ships while flying through space by gathering the natural radiation to was pulsing through the universe, let off by the many stars and other celestial bodies. But she had to make sure the panels designed to gather such radiation were closed when they moved for entry into Namek’s atmosphere or they might be in for a world of trouble. The last thing she wanted was for them to lose the panels and find themselves trapped on the alien world.

Even though she had checked several times already and all the systems said the panels were closed she still checked them again…

‘You just need something to do to keep your mind off things,’ she thought to herself as she looked to make sure that she had all the shielding on the front of the ship ready. ‘Because this isn’t the end of our journey. Its only the first step.’ She looked out through the cockpit’s windshield (was it a ‘wind’ shield if there was no wind?) towards the rapidly growing dot out in the darkness of space. The planet Namek. ‘We have no idea what we will encounter there. Senza has no memories of what his home planet… maybe the Namekians are like Kami. Kind and helpful and they will allow us to use their version of the Dragon Balls to bring back Master Roshi.’

She suddenly had a vision of just that…

“Oh, you wish to use the Dragon Balls?” the leader of the Namekians said with a bored shrug. “Sure, go ahead. I think Version Number 217 is charged up and ready to go.” He waved his hand towards a truly massive pile of Dragon Balls that was just behind him. “Just remember to wipe them off when you are done!”

‘But he was also sent away from his home when he was just a child. No protection, no guardians. Nothing. They might not believe in helping at all…’

“Let you use OUR Dragon Balls?” the leader of the Namekians asked in disgust. “Oh, you expected me to just let you do that? Ha! If you wish to use the Dragon Balls you must prove yourself… by wrestling me in the acid mine!”

‘We have no idea what we are going to find ourselves walking into.’

“Bulma!” Chichi exclaimed, causing the scientist to jolt out of her thoughts. “Are you listening to me?”

“…is there any way to admit that I wasn’t that will result in you NOT flying into a fit of rage?”

“Excuse me?” Chichi said only for Bulma to shield herself. “What are you doing?”

Slowly dropping her arms Bulma said, “No offense but ever since we found out you were a Saiyan all of us have been a bit… leery of you.”

“Leery of-!” Bulma once again raised her arms to protect herself. That got Chichi to take a breath and, in a calmer voice, ask, “Why would you be leery of me? I haven’t been acting any different than I was before we learned about…” She gestured at her tail that was wrapped around her waist.

“Yeah, that’s true,” Bulma admitted. “But the thing is that your little rage moments take on a different tone when we know you have the power to karate chop a mountain in half.”

“You aren’t afraid of Goku,” Chichi pointed out. “You scold him all the time.”

“…yeah. Because its Goku.”

Chichi quietly conceded the point. “I would never hurt you.” She wrapped her arms around herself. “I’m just worried about Goku. And Kayos. They disappeared and we have no idea when they will be back.”

Bulma did see her point. She wasn’t happy that Goku had rushed into that portal, leaving them behind with the promise of finding them. After all, he had no way of knowing where Namek was; the ship was on autopilot, returning back to where it had come, and despite her, her dad, and Raditz doing all they could they’d been unable to figure out how to download that information so they could figure out exactly where the ship was going. They’d been forced to just trust the vessel… which was worrisome.

But…

“Listen, if there is anyone that can figure it out its Goku,” Bulma assured her. “I think he’s too stubborn to remain lost. When we first began traveling together half the time it felt like he just spun in a circle and when he stopped he’d just begin walking in that direction. But as frustrating as that was… we always ended up where we needed to be.”

Chichi let out a huff at that, sliding into the co-pilot’s chair. “I suppose you’re right on that. Goku does tend to wander off… but he always finds his way back home.”

“Then there is Avo,” Bulma said. “I have no idea how his spells work but he’s far too cunning to allow himself to get lost. He’ll figure out some way to get back to us.”

“I just hope he doesn’t cause any more trouble,” Chichi stated. “Or end up back with the Tree of Might.”

Bulma grimaced at that; the locals had been forgiving of them but they had made rather clear if they ever saw Avo Kayos again they’d have words. She just hoped that the Scroll of Knowledge was right and their planet would recover quickly.

“I just don’t like being separated from him,” Chichi said, rubbing her arms nervously. “Its weird… for so much of our marriage we lived separate lives. Goku would leave to tend to the farm or whatever else he’d do and I’d stay at the house. He’d show up for meals but then head out again. We slept in the same bed but often it felt like we were miles apart. But ever since Raditz first appeared… we haven’t been apart for more than a few hours. We understand each other better. I always felt like I had to tug Goku to my side of thinking or he was yanking me towards his views but… we’ve come together. Met in the middle.”

“Doesn’t hurt the sex is great too,” Bulma teased, Chichi blushing at that.

“Oh, that isn’t proper to speak of…”

“Come on, you must have noticed some differences. I know ever since I’ve begun working out I’ve felt better about myself and I don’t even have a boyfriend.”

Chichi was utterly crimson, nibbling on her lower lip even as she said, “Well… it certainly hasn’t… hurt things.”

Bulma just laughed and after a moment Chichi found herself chuckling as well. Not as loudly as Bulma… but her mood lifted.

“Hey,” Bulma said, placing a hand on her friend’s shoulder once they’d both settled down, “it will be okay. We’ll go to Namek, we’ll bring back Master Roshi, and then if they haven’t caught up to us we’ll find Goku and Avo. None of us are going to leave them behind.”

“Thanks,” Chichi said before staring out at the planet. “Do we have an idea what we are going to face down there?”

“No but I am ruling some stuff out.”

“What do you mean?”

“Okay, so I’m not getting any radio waves. No AM/FM radio. No televisions. Nothing like that. There is no space junk. No satellites or abandoned space craft or space stations. So they don’t have things like that. And I’m not detecting any signs of large cities.”

“So they might not be as advanced as us?”

“Yes and no. They don’t have that stuff… but they did make this ship.” Bulma gestured at the craft they were currently sitting in. “And this is old… hundreds of years old. Kami was a baby when he was sent in this to Earth. That means that they could only have gotten better when it came to creating ships.”

“Or they made a wish,” Chichi reminded her. “They might be more magic based than us. Maybe they used the Dragon Balls in order to wish for this ship to send Kami off. Or Senza.” She shook her head; it was still odd to think like that, even after the few weeks they’d spent with the Namekian.

Bulma frowned. “Yeah… I hadn’t considered that. I was running under the assumption that they had cleaner energy than us and used something other than radio waves for communicating… but it all might be magic.” She groaned. “And of course we don’t have Avo here to detect things!”

“Kayos will return to us,” Chichi said with a bit of smugness, recalling the words Bulma had just spoke to her.

“Yeah year…” Bulma said before pressing a button on the control panel. “Okay everyone, we are nearing Planet Namek. Get everything secured and ready… we have no idea what kind of greeting will be awaiting us!”

~MC~MC~MC~

Tien looked over at Senza who was in the lotus position, eyes closed. But if anyone thought he was at peace then they truly weren’t looking. The way his forehead was creased, how his eyes were shut just a bit too tight, the tension in his shoulders…

It was why Tien had no problem walking up to the Namekian and interrupting him.

“Want to talk about it?” the triclops asked.

Senza didn’t open his eyes but his shoulders did drop a touch. “No but I also feel that I should,” he muttered in annoyance. “I don’t like not knowing what we are going to find down there.”

“I’m guessing this is something different from Bulma and the others worrying about getting the Dragon Balls.”

Senza nodded, finally opening his eyes. “I was sent away from my home when I was an infant. I have no memory of it. My first memories are of Earth. And yet this is my home… I can feel it. My heart… it calls out to return.”

Tien noded. “I can’t imagine what that would be like. I think only Goku could really understand.”

“Yes. I had tried to discuss it with him but…” More of his Piccolo half shined through as Senza let out a huff. “You know how Goku is. He brushes such things off rather easily. He doesn’t let them bother him. He’s annoyingly stubborn like that.”

“I don’t know if its stubbornness… or blockheadedness either.” Because Tien had thought that more than once about Goku when he’d tried to discuss some of the personal issues he’d gone through. Him and Chiaotzu had turned against Master Shien and the entire Crane School, the place that was closest to home, and thrown themselves into the wild and strange world where they didn’t fully understand the rules. The ones they had ended up being shown to be dishonorable and wrong.

…Goku had just said it was great they were able to be among their friends and moved on.

‘I understood him not really dwelling on Yamcha’s death because we decided we were bringing him back. But he never really considered what it meant for him to have a brother and not be from Earth. He never really stopped to think about any of that. Same with Master Roshi. Or that there are other Saiyans out there. We thought him and Raditz and Vegeta were the only ones left but Goku… he killed his own uncle. That’s rough to begin with but it also means that there may have been more Saiyans who survived. And Goku doesn’t… care. He just went off right with Kayos to go save that other world.’

“Sometimes,” he finally said, “I can’t decide if I should scold him or admire him. He isn’t ever crippled with doubt. He knows what he can do, who he is, and that is that. You can’t shake him.”

“Yes,” Senza said. “I do find that a strong quality for him to have. But it also makes him ill suited to discuss such things.” Now more of Kami was shining through. “I do not know why I was sent away from Namek. Was it for my own good? Was there some… disaster? Slug didn’t know… never spoke of it. And even if he had I wouldn’t have trusted him. So was that it? Was there some great disaster and now we will return to find a people in ruin?”

“Raditz mentioned that he’s heard of Namekians,” Tien pointed out. “Never met one himself…”

“Yes… there is that. We can at least rest easily that we will most likely not land on a deadplanet.” Senza though shook his head after a moment. “But then there is the worry and fear that I will not be received warmly.”

“What do you mean?”

“Human history is filled with tales of the sins of the father being passed down to the son. What if I wasn’t sent to earth… but banished there?”

“Because of something someone else did?”

Senza nodded. “Or… what Raditz mentioned when it came to Goku.”

Tien had tried hard to forget that little bit of information. The idea that Goku had been meant to be a world killer, destroying all of humanity just so the Saiyans could then claim the planet? It was… horrifying. Especially after dealing with Turles and seeing a dark, twisted version of Goku.

‘If it hadn’t been for Grandpa Gohan dropping him on his head…’ Goku told the story with a smile and a laugh, claiming it was the first time he’d realized he had a thick skull. But Raditz, when he’d heard that story, had commented that there were reports of Saiyans undergoing massive personality shifts thanks to head wounds. One old man with butterfingers had resulted in Earth’s greatest threat becoming its greatest champion.

“What if that was why I was sent to Earth?” Senza asked. “What if, like Goku, I was meant to destroy?”

“I don’t believe that.”

“Slug was sent to Planet Slug and he wasn’t the beacon of kindness.”

“Slug also ripped out his goodness.” Senza shot him a look and Tien grimaced. “Okay, so you did something similar… but not quite…”

“And that is my final fear, Tien,” Senza said. “What if they learn what I did when I was 2 beings? Of King Piccolo’s actions? I don’t know how I would handle it if I returned to my home only to be told I wasn’t worthy of it.”

Tien, sadly, didn’t have an answer.

~MC~MC~MC~

Vegeta frowned as he stepped out of his pod, looking at the world that lay before him.

‘To think that this pathetic, meaningless planet will be the source of my eternal rule,’ he thought as he looked about the barren landscape.

He could accept that grand empires could have planets that didn’t reflect their greatness. After all, from what he remembered of his own home planet there were vast swatches of it that were little more than rock. But that was because the Saiyans needed places to practice their fighting abilities so such areas were left empty, so there would be no risk to their cities. And the Saiyans, by their very nature, needed to avoid one another often enough lest their feuds explode. Only in the cities where powerful commanders ruled with heavy fists could a large gathering of Saiyans occur and thus the need for massive encampments.

But Namek?

No cities. No grand monuments. No real signs of life at all.

Vegeta toed some of the blue grass he was standing on before looking at the green waters. ‘Air is breathable,’ he thought to himself. ‘Very breathable.’ While the pod he had stolen had informed him of that he still always liked to see just HOW breathable the air was. Would it be thin? Heavy? But much to his delight it was the proper mixture for him. Fighting wouldn’t be a challenge here. ‘Ground is solid enough. No clear mountain ranges but plenty of plateaus. Trees are tall, mostly trunk. Water…’ He took out a testing kit and dipped it into the water… after a moment it changed to show that while there was a bit more, of all things, sugar in the water than one might have suspected it was perfectly fine to drink. ‘A perfect place for life.’

He knew that there were plenty in Frieza’s army that would have been shocked by him doing such readings. Thanks to the likes of Nappa and that traitor Raditz the opinion that Saiyans were just dumb brutes who would rushed head-first into a star without even stopping to realize how hot it was had only grown. But Vegeta had been raised not just to be a fighter but a strategist. A warrior needed to be able to look at a weapon and quickly understand how it worked so they could then take it apart. Know how to repair their pod if it became damaged. How to take over a planet’s communication systems so that your broadcast declaring that you were in charge was heard by all. Vegeta knew how to do all of this…

…not that he let anyone realize it.

‘One doesn’t flaunt their knowledge,’ his father had once told him after Vegeta had made the mistake of pointing out an error one of his father’s advisors had made. ‘That lets people know something about you… and the more they know the more they have available to destroy you.’

Vegeta shook his head. ‘I am getting distracted.’ He looked about Planet Vegeta, forcing the memories of the past to leave him. ‘Low signs of life. Most aquatic.’ He closed his eyes and began to focus. ‘Now then… where are they…’

Sensing energy had always been something he’d been interested in learning. A vital skill that allowed him to find his targets, be their prey or warriors. But Frieza and his cronies had always frowned upon that skill, seeing it as something that wasn’t needed with the scouters. Frieza especially, Vegeta had come to realize, was utterly lazy. He hated to walk and preferred flying around in his little hover pod; even when it was terribly awkward he would do so, demanding that entire ships be altered just to accommodate that. He didn’t like using the most basic of non-combative moves because ‘there are machines for that!’ It was one of the reasons why Vegeta had begun thinking about overthrowing the petulant little fool.

So, in secret, Vegeta had begun to master the art of Energy Sensing. It had taken a lot of work but when he had managed it he had been rather pleased. No longer did he need a scouter in order to find his targets or to see how strong a foe was. He simply could look at them and, with a bit of focus, determine the truth of them.

Which is what he was doing at that moment.

‘There,’ he thought with a smirk, feeling a concentration of life. ‘There is a village there. Or some gathering of the natives.’ He rose up into the air before blasting off. ‘I will demand answers from them. Should they provide me what I desire I might be inclined to allow them to live. But should they show any resistance…’ Vegeta balled his hand up into a fist. After his fight on Earth he had healed… and felt his power increase by leaps and bounds. That, combined with the Mental Training he had done in his pod had left him feeling 10 times stronger than he had been on Earth.

And he was eager to test his limits.

‘I will have what I want,’ Vegeta thought darkly. ‘I will gain what I deserve.’

First he would wish for immortality. Make it that there was nothing anyone could do to prevent him from dominating the universe. Then he would turn the wretched planet he was on into his new capital, the starting part for the Saiyan Empire. Another wish would bring the female Saiyan from Earth to him, where he would be able to get her to understand her place. Clearly Raditz and his brother had filled her head with delusions about what was expected of her and Vegeta would enjoy very much destroying those errors.

‘Perhaps, after she has come to see the error of her ways, I will bring her the barely breathing corpses of Raditz and Kakarot. She might torture them to her heart’s content… the perfect gift to seal our marriage.’ He smirked at that. ‘And then… I will begin the process of recreating the Saiyan Race. These Dragon Balls… they are able to do the impossible. I will create new Saiyans, all loyal to me, their eternal king. They will spread across the galaxy, conquering planets all in my name.’

He could see it in his mind’s eye. Millions of Saiyans flying away from Namek, the new Planet Vegeta, spreading out through the cosmos. Planets falling to them one by one as they planted a flag with his face upon it in each of their capital worlds. Vegeta, surrounded by glowing orbs, cackling as he used the Dragon Balls to convert the useless sacks of flesh into the biomaterial needed to create even more Saiyans. An entire universe of just his kind, all bending the knee to him while he sat upon his throne, Frieza’s head on a spike and the Saiyan female, his queen, loyally kneeling at his side.

‘I will have it. I will have all of that. I will bring about a new age of the Saiyan Race!’ Vegeta thought as he continued on. ‘And there will be no mercy for any that get in my way.’

~MC~MC~MC~

“Now that feels good!” Krillin said, stretching a bit as he stood outside the ship. “Don’t get me wrong, Bulma, the ship was great, but it feels so good to actually have some fresh air!” He took in a deep breath, eyes shut as he felt the wind on his face. Raditz, who was near by, couldn’t find it in himself to dismiss the bald man or his actions; honestly he was feeling the same way. It was why so many Saiyans came out ready for a fight; after being trapped in their pods for so long any chance to get the heart pumping and the body moving was welcomed.

Though he could have done with the planet not being so… clean. He was managing to get used to Earth but the stench of Namek, with its crips air and lack of pollutants, was rather startling for him. He wasn’t used to breathing without the smell of fresh paint that clung to most Frieza Force Ships, the burning of cities, or the hint of radiation for death weapons in the air.

“Man, if we weren’t here for business I’d suggest taking a vacation,” Krillin continued on saying. “Set up some lawn chairs, maybe get the barbeque going…”

“Of course that’s assuming the Namekians would allow it,” Senza reminded him. “After all, they could be more like Piccolo than they are Kami.”

“…what?” Krillin said nervously, having not thought of that. Senza, for his part, flashed a smile that had Krillin letting out a yelp, much to the amusement of his friends.

“But you think they will be nice, Mr. Senza?” Gohan asked.

Senza looked down at the boy and fondly patted him on the head. “Stick with me, kid, and I’ll make sure they are.” Gohan beamed at that; with Kakarot gone he had even moreso than normal gravitated towards Senza, knowing that he could protect him. Chichi and him had discussed it, the Namekian not wanting her to be offended that her son was so comfortable around him, and Chichi had assured him it was fine. Raditz wasn’t jealous either; it was good for the boy to have different people he relied upon as it would avoid confusion during training. He had mentioned that to Kakarot back on Earth, that Gohan needed to train with people that he couldn’t be 100% sure would always protect him. Yes, trust was sometimes important, but just as important was to be on your guard. If you went into every fight believing your opponent would pull their punch then you’d develop bad habits.

“Alright!” Yamcha said, clapping his hands together. “No time like the present! We need to find those Dragon Balls! Hand over the Dragon Radar, Bulma!”

“Yeah… no,” she said dryly, causing Yamcha, who had stuck out his hand to get the device, to suddenly topple forward.

“What? What do you mean no?!?”

“Because I know as soon as I hand these out half of you are going to go flying off without a second thought!”

“We would never…” Yamcha grimaced. “Okay, that’s exactly what we would do.”

Bulma nodded. “And we need to do this right. Remember, this isn’t Earth. This is a completely alien planet and we need to handle this properly.”

That made Raditz scoff. “I say we just find the first Namekian we can find and get them to tell us all about the Dragon Balls.”

“How would we do that?” Gohan asked.

“Well,” Raditz said with a dark smirk only to freeze up with Chichi glared at him; he had begun to learn that he did NOT want to get on the woman’s bad side. Chichi was rather… creative… in how she dealt with people that annoyed her. So his entire speech about how they would blast in, kill the strongest warrior they could find, and use that to dominate the other Namekians was swiftly abandoned. “I think it would be best to rely upon Senza and the others to start…” He repressed a shudder, “…diplomatic relations.”

“Exactly!” Bulma declared. “We need to find the local Namekians and first see if they are okay with us searching out the Dragon Balls. Make sure we don’t break any rules or the like.”

“And there is a chance we might not need to search,” Tien pointed out. “They might know right where they are.”

“That’s right,” Yamcha said, his earlier pratfall forgotten. “On Earth a lot of the Dragon Balls were kept as prized relics. They might do the same here.”

“The only question now is if we should all go or if we should have some hang back,” Bulma stated.

“What do you mean?” Krillin asked. “It’s obvious what we should do!”

Tien nodded. “Of course it is.”

“I’m glad we’re in agreement.”

“Completely.”

“We shoud go together.”/”We should split up.”

The two stared at each other as it slowly registered exactly what the other had said.

“What are you talking about?” Krillin exclaimed. “We need to all go together! We have no idea what we might be facing in that village.”

“Exactly,” Tien stated. “That’s why it would be best for some of us to remain here, just in case it is a trap.”

“Ooooorrrr we all go together so that if it is a trap we are able to fight our way out. Look at how much better we worked against Turles and Slug when we were together.”

Tien nodded. “Yeah, you’re right there, but if they had managed to overwhelm us we would have been in a lot of trouble. And because this is an alien planet we can’t call upon any help. Goku and Kayos are the only ones that might be able to show up and we have no idea when they will be back.”

“Right,” Krillin said. “Alien planet we’ve NEVER been too. That means if we go wandering off we might never be able to find each other again. Who knows how big Namek is.”

“I know,” Bulma said but Krillin ignored her.

“If we split up we could end up wandering for weeks on end. If we stick together then we’ll always know where each other is, be able to quickly help each other…”

“Leave the ship unprotected,” Tien commented.

“Actually we are going to send it back up,” Bulma said before glancing at Isco. “And lock the controls so Isco can’t leave us behind to save himself.”

“That is a fair assessment.”

“And then there are the locals!” Krillin said. “They won’t be happy if we don’t bring everyone with us. They will see it as us lying about our numbers.”

“Or they will be overwhelmed by everyone we bring with us and that could cause a fight.”

“Then why don’t we leave a select few here, go to the village, and be honest that we have more of us waiting?” Chiaotzu asked.

Krillin and Tien both considered that. Neither really liked that plan, as there were a lot of issues with it, but it was the best compromise anyone could think of.

“Alright, then who should go?” Chichi asked.

Yamcha was the one that spoke up. “I think Tien, Krillin, and me should go with Senza. Isco, Chichi and Gohan as well.”

Chichi frowned at that. “Gohan?”

Yamcha nodded. “Yeah. Gohan will show that we aren’t a threat to them. They see us with a kid they will know we aren’t just marauders coming to pillage. And Gohan can fight so if things get rough. Tien and Krillin and I know how to fight together so we’re the best bet if things do get messy. Senza should come because that might be our in; they see another Namekian and know that we aren’t invaders. We were invited. Isco has the best monitoring systems so he can let us know there is trouble as well as relay everything to you guys in real time.”

Isco nodded at that. “I have been working on connection my true form to the ship’s systems. It was so I could take full control over it but it seems Bulma was smart enough to install firewalls…”

Bulma smirked. “I know you too well, Isco.”

Tien let out a huff at that. ‘And with Kayos gone Isco’s loyalty to us plummets.’ Everyone knows that the droid was highly considerate of Avo Kayos with Bulma a close second. But while he was friendly enough with all of them Tien was well aware that Isco still saw all non-robotic life, save for Kayos and Bulma, as disposable and would abandon them the first chance he got.

“As for those staying behind…” Yamcha said, looking at Raditz who huffed.

“Yeah, I get it. If they’ve heard of Saiyans it might not be wise for me to come storming in there.”

‘And there is the fact that your first reaction might be to terrorize them,’ Tien thought before speaking up. “Chiaotzu and I work best if we are separate, so he can be powering me up. And Bulma can make sure the ship is ready to go if something happens.”

“Right!” Krillin declared. “Let’s get going, guys!” Bulma finally handed over the Dragon Radar… only for Krillin to blink. “Huh… one of the balls is in the direction of the Village. I wonder if that means something?”

“Could mean a lot of things but we won’t know until we get there,” Tien stated, floating up. “So lets get going!”

And with that the gang blasted off.

~MC~MC~MC~

“Lord Frieza, might I enter?”

Frieza, sitting in his mobile throne, looking out the space port at the vastness of the space, touched a button on the control panel. The door slid open and Zarbon entered, Dodoria only a few steps behind him. They took three steps in and by the time Frieza had twisted his throne around they were already kneeling, heads bowed.

It was why Frieza kept them around. Yes, they had been installed by his father to keep an eye on him, he knew that. And yes, they most likely had been also commanded to spy on him… but they knew their place. Never once let it be known that they weren’t anything but loyal to him.

Frieza knew the games his father played.

‘Despite claiming you are retired… you are still in the game. Still trying to control the universe. Only now, rather than use brute strength… you prefer more subtle things. I can almost respect that, father. Almost.’ He narrowed his eyes, Zarbon and Dodoria remaining still, heads down as they refused to lift their eyes to meet his own. ‘There are so many ways I can play this. Feed you false information so you believe I am doing one thing when I’m really doing another. Going utterly radio silent so that your little spies grow desperate for information and make a mistake. Simply slaughter them as soon as I discover them, forcing you to constantly try and find new spies. Many would consider trying to turn them to my side… easy enough to do, father, considering that you are so, so far away while they have to spend every moment with me.

‘But… no. No that would all be too bothersome. I prefer to continue on as if I never knew. Let you believe that I foolishly took you at your word and that the likes of Zarbon and Dodoria are now my utterly loyal minions, doing exactly as I command. That they have surrendered all connection to you and are completely mine to do with as I wish. All the while preparing for the one day, which now races far closer than you realize, where I will no longer need to play these games.’

“Raise,” Frieza declared and at once the two did so. “Well, what is it? I have many important tasks to see to and don’t have time for the normal fawning.”

“The systems state that we will be nearing Planet Namek soon, my lord,” Zarbon stated.

“And you are positive that it is actually Planet Namek?” he pressed. “Because I will not be pleased with either of you if this information was wrong and you… got my hopes up.” He smirked even as he narrowed his eyes. “You know how well I handle disappointment.”

The two didn’t react at all which was rather nice. While Frieza did enjoy it when his minions cowered under the threat of his wrath he also rather liked it when they were able to hide their fear and keep to the task at hand. Stammering and stumbling over their words so did delay things, after all.

“We have past several moons that fit well with other reports we’ve had concerning Namek,” Dodoria stated.

“And the planet is giving off a unique energy reading that fits the claims of others who are said to have found it.”

Frieza nodded ever so slightly at that. Ever since he’d heard the legend of the Dragon Balls, the ancient relics that could grant their gatherer a single wish, he had made sure to quietly gather all the information he could about them. Or, rather, had his people gather the information and then vaporized them to cover his tracks. Still, there were many to have claimed to have found the planet but he had determined that of them all only 3 had actually managed to make it to Planet Namek and all had reported an odd energy reading.

It was a good sign.

“Very good,” Frieza stated.

Dodoria, feeling a bit bolder, stepped forward. “I have been working with the men. The entire fleet is ready to lay siege to the planet-“

“No,” Frieza said, cutting him off.

Dodoria nearly stumbled at that, all his momentum halted from that little declaration. “No… my lord?”

“Yes. I would think, what with it being only two letters, that even your thick skull would be able to understand it, Dodoria.” Removing himself from his mobile throne Frieza began to pace, arms folded behind his back. “The Namekians have shown that they are willing to do whatever it takes in order to protect their secrets. If we rush in and begin raining destruction down upon them they could quite easily decide to take the Dragon Balls and leave or destroy them. No… while it is your nature to be a hammer we must be like the finest of knives. A small, flexible blade, able to slip between the skin and the muscle to flay away all we do not desire to get to the true treasures that lie beneath. “

“Of course, Lord Frieza,” Zarbon stated. “We will take full control of the space around Namek, so no ship can come in or out. Then strike forces will be sent to secure the planet while a task force collects the Dragon Balls. Perhaps the Ginyu Force or-“

“Now now, Zarbon,” Frieza said tauntingly, “you make it sound as if you don’t want to get your hands dirty.”

“Lord Frieza?”

“What is it that I have said so very often to you all?” Frieza asked, looking out the window once more. When neither answered he said, “For any job you use whoever is best suited for a task. If I wish to humiliate some pathetic little planet I send those monkeys. If I wish to preserve what they have I send you, Zarbon. If I need to make an example of some foolish rebel then Dodoria is my choice. But here… to gather the Dragon Balls… there is only one choice.”

He turned.

“Myself.”

“Y-you, Lord Frieza?”

“Yes, me,” Frieza stated. “I will be going down personally with you both. We will collect the Dragon Balls ourselves while the Frieza Force secures the planet. I do not trust anyone else to handle this situation.”

“Yes, Lord Frieza,” Zarbon said, Dodoria quickly echoing that statement.

Frieza paused, letting them think everything was done, before adding, “Oh, and I have shut down all communication between the Fleet and all other stations and systems. I don’t want a rush of fools coming here thinking they can help up.”

He could see the reflections of the two warriors wincing at that.

‘Ah… now you don’t know what to do. Can’t run to my father and ask him exactly what should be the next step. Let me guess… you had instructions to claim the Dragon Balls and take them to him? Just as I am sure Cooler has sent his own loyal spies within the Frieza Force the same instructions. But now that I will be handling this personally neither of you know what to do.’ He smirked. ‘Well… you are going to either do as I tell you or finally reveal your traitorous alliances…”

It was a heedy feeling. Soon the game would be done. The spies revealed. Immortality in his grasp. And the chains of his family shattered.

The game would be done.

And Lord Frieza, Emperor of the Known Universe, would be the victor.

Chapter Text

“Alright… here we go,” Yamcha said as they landed just outside the village. They had debated who should speak first and in the end they’d decided that he was the best choice. Yamcha, thanks to his baseball career, was far more used to addressing strangers than all the rest of them. Senza was out because they didn’t know how the other Namekians would react to him. Chichi herself had admitted it would be wise if she didn’t speak, just in case the Namekians were chauvinistic; Raditz had stated that he’d never heard of a Namekian female before. And Isco…

“This would make a lovely place to place a boot camp,” the droid said, looking about. “Would need to scrub it of the pesky vermin though.”

…Isco was out.

‘Honestly, I wish Kayos was here,’ Yamcha thought nervously. ‘He’d be the best talking with these guys.’ While most of the gang was still smarting over his actions with the Tree of Might Yamcha had quickly moved past it; after all, all of them had done stupid selfish things in the past sowho were they to judge the man? And in the end it had worked out so what did it matter? ‘I just have to think a bit like him… careful with what I say, put on some charm, and make sure that they give us terms that help us out.’

They didn’t get too far until one of the Namekians noticed them, eyes widening before he began to motion for others to join him. The Namekians reminded him much of Senza, being roughly the same height and build, but behind them he saw other Namekians of various heights and weights and ages, including several elderly Namekians and some children as well.

“Hello,” Yamcha said, catching himself before he called out his greeting, remembering that Namekians had very good hearing.

“Hello,” the first Namekian he had spotted said, taking him in carefully. “Who are you? We don’t normally have visitors… in fact we never do.”

“We’re a group of travelers who sought out Namek. We have with us-“

“Come now, Larin,” a voice tinted with age said and the younger Namekian at once turned and dipped his head in the direction of an older, heavier Namekian. He was around Chichi’s height with a very wrinkled face and a thicker body than any other Namekian Yamcha had ever seen; honestly he reminded him of King Kai in terms of build. Someone that had relaxed their training but still held great power in their form. Someone not to dismiss out of hand. “That is no way to greet new arrivals… especially one with a Namekian with them.”

“Can you not sense it, Elder Sax?” Larin said, eying the Z Fighters up. “The evil in their hearts?”

Before Yamcha could speak though Elder Sax waved him off. “Now now… what have we told you about the dangers of sensing the hearts of others?”

Larin looked down, clearly embarrassed. “To… not become fixated on a single aspect. But-“

“You have never left Namek,” Elder Sax stated. But it was… kindly. Gently. It reminded Yamcha of how Doctor Brief would talk to Bulma; correcting a mistake but out of love. “You have not had much experience with the greater universe. What is in their hearts… well, there is so evil there. I’m not denying that. But everyone has a touch of evil. That is just the way life is. We aren’t all selfless. Even us Namekians. How hard did you need to focus on them?”

“…quite a bit,” Larin admitted.

“Quite a bit. Yes. Because the good in them so buries the evil.” Elder Sax reached out and gently patted Larin on the arm. “You are a good warrior, Larin. A very good warrior. Thank you for watching out for us.” He then turned to Yamcha. “I am Elder Sax, leader of this village. We welcome you all.”

“Thank you,” Yamcha stated, bowing deeply. “We are sorry if we didn’t approach correctly… other than our friend Senza we’ve only interacted with one other Namekian and he… did not tell us how to properly introduce ourselves.”

“Understandable,” Elder Sax said before moving towards Senza. “…ah. You are quite interesting, aren’t you? I had given up all hope of ever seeing another of the Lost Hope return to us.”

“The… Lost Hope?” Senza asked.

“Indeed. Come… come… I will explain.” And with that Elder Sax led them into the village proper. Yamcha was struck by the fact that, despite them being on an alien world and surrounded by aliens… it all seemed rather normal. How, there were the odd things, like Namekians looking over water containers rather than dealing with food prep, or how one Namekian simply changed into clothing that was better suited for training by using Ki to create them out of thin air… but still, it was very much like Earth.

‘Makes me feel at ease,’ he thought as he watched an older Namekian read to some children. ‘Just because I am far away from home doesn’t mean that there aren’t pieces of home right here.’

Elder Sax settled down under one of the Namekian trees that was growing in was Yamcha wagered was their version of a village center, motioning for Senza and the rest of the Z Fighters to settle around him. They all did so, save for Isco who remained behind the group, tense and ready. Chichi placed Gohan in her lap, running her fingers through his hair to calm him for the little boy was practically vibrating in excitement.

“Centuries ago… a great drought came upon Namek, one that threatened our entire race. It was feared that we would all perish and, because we had always remained here, never seeing a need to move beyond our home, all that was the Namekian would die with us. That is… a terrible thing to think about… that you might be the last to know of your songs… your tales… your history. Oh, others might find this planet… discover our bones and books. But they will never fully understand us. They will guess but they will never fully understand.”

“We have that on our planet,” Bulma said. “There were species that died off and we try and understand what they were like but…” She trailed off and Elder Sax nodded.

“Yes… you can see how frightening such a prospect can be. We had done all we could to save our planet, of course… it was a matter of waiting.” And Yamcha had a feeling he knew exactly what the Elder meant by that: waiting for the Dragon Balls to fully recharge so they might be able wish for an end of the drought. “But of course there was the grave threat that we might run out of time. As such it was decided that the only way we could save our people… was to do the thing that we had never done. What had caused us to end up in the situation we found ourselves in: leave Namek.

“It… it might seem barbaric, that you were sent out alone, Senza.” Elder Sax sighed, staring at Senza intently, searching his face. Yamcha didn’t get any sense that Senza was feeling one way or another about what Sax had revealed and yet at the same time he also had the feeling that Sax DID know something was going through Senza’s heart. Maybe it was how he had been able to read the good and evil in their hearts or perhaps that he knew how to look upon a fellow Namekian and see the tiny frowns and twitches that spoke of outrage. Whatever it was… he sensed it. “I understand feeling that way. I felt it myself.”

“You… you were sent away?”

“Indeed,” Elder Sax replied. “You and I were two of fifty Namekian children that were launched into space, scattered amongst the stars in hopes we might find homes to survive upon and, should the worst happen to Namek, be able to continue on. You must understand-“ he looked at Yamcha and the others, “our parents were desperate. Normally Namekians only have a single child and only when we are very old. A kind of… reincarnation, as it were.”

“We’re aware,” Senza said, “but we can cover that after your story is done. The disaster… it was a bad one?”

“We are currently at a 10th of what was once our population. It has taken many years to reach this point and it is a pale shadow of what we once were.” He shut his eyes. “I never saw it… but I have been told that once we had great cities filled with Namekians. The planet once teamed with us. Now we are just six great villages.”

“Why not just make more eggs?” Gohan asked.

Elder Sax smiled at Gohan, warm and gentle. “While after the Great Drought many eggs were made… it was a horrid thing to do. Producing many children without great care? It had to be done but it was also a painful thing for us, spiritually. And the first few generations were born as already adults, which can be done but it results in a shortened life. A stolen life.”

Senza shifted uneasily at that.

‘That’s what King Piccolo did,’ Yamcha thought. ‘He created his sons to fight Goku. He was doing the same thing that Elder Sax is discussing… but at least the Namekians did that to try and repopulate their planet.’

“Only elder Namekians can produce eggs. It is said that is because when a Namekian reaches a certain age they have the wisdom to raise a child.” He paused. “Though that isn’t the only reason. We are still suffering from the affects of the Great Drought. Where we sit, right now? This used to be the Mighty Tango Sea.” He pointed to a small pond. “That is all that remains of it.”

“Oh my…” Chichi whispered.

“Things are… getting better. Slowly. The rains become heavier each year. But we have reached the limits of our population growth. We dare not grow too large, not after what happened before.”

“You said that you were one of the Lost Hope?” Senza pressed, clearly wanting to get back to the tale. Yamcha didn’t blame him; Elder Sax held the secrets of his past, after all, and Senza had shown great patience with the delay Gohan’s question had caused.

‘Though it might provide more answers,’ Yamcha thought, looking around. ‘They suffered greatly and that affected them. Will for hundreds of more years, most likely.’ He knew what it was like, how lacking in something could affect a person.

“Yes. Once we were called the Last Hope. But when the drought ended and attempts were made to retrieve us… only to fail? We became the Lost Hope. The 50 children sent off into the stars. We used to send out Namekian Warriors to look for any whispers about the children that were sent out… I was one of the lucky ones, found 5 years after I had been sent out. Others were found far too late… either turned into savage beasts that little understood right from wrong… or were found slain.” He closed his eyes. “Our attempt to save out people doomed so many… it is a sin we will all bear for generations.

“It is why so few warriors now leave the planet… that and the fact that hope of finding any of the Lost Hope has dwindled. I will live perhaps a few decades more before I perish and I have had the benefit of living on Namek almost my entire life. I was not corrupted as so many of those found later were. And we are… hunted, Senza. Namekians are known to dangerous beings who seek us out and slaughter us when we refuse to bow to them.”

“We know of both,” Senza stated. “We learned of Namek from another of the Lost Hope… a Namekian who took the name Slug.”

Elder Sax blinked at that, startled. “Truly?” But then his eyes fell down to his lap. “You killed him.”

“He threatened our world,” Tien said. “And had threatened many others. “

“That is disappointing… but not unexpected,” Elder Sax said softly. “Our warriors were forced to deal with a few of the Lost Hope who had found themselves lost in wickedness, turned into members of the Demon Tribe. It is part of the reason Lord Guru decided that we would no longer send Warriors out to look for the Lost Hopes; it was too cruel to send them against their fellow Namekians.” His jaw worked. “Or they would go expecting to find a brother and instead be left cradling a corpse far too small.”

Everyone was quiet at that.

“…I never blamed any of you for not looking for me,” Senza stated, looking down at his own hands. “And I lived… well, I suppose good isn’t quite the right word for it but… I am content with the life I have led.”

“I was going to ask you of that,” Elder Sax stated. “How are you so young? You should be my age and yet you look to be in the prime of your life.”

Senza managed a smile at that. “it… is a long story.”

“We have the time,” Elder Sax stated, slowly getting up. “While we must get you to Lord Guru, for he will wish to see you, I won’t rush you after just arriving here… I would never be forgiven by the rest of village.” He chuckled and Yamcha turned to see that several Namekians had been glancing at them only to duck their heads and act like they hadn’t been snooping. “Come now… come now… there will be many interested in meeting you… and your friends.” He looked over the rest of the Z Fighters. “it is good you have found your own tribe… we will wish to greet them all.”

Yamcha smiled as he watched Senza get up, allowing Elder Sax to take him over to some Namekian adults and introduce him. ‘I know we are supposed to be finding out about the Dragon Balls… but I think it can wait a bit longer…’

~MC~MC~MC~

‘Namekians.’

For years Frieza had made it a standing order to capture a living Namekian and bring them to him. No one had known why he had desired them… honestly most of the Frieza Force had thought them a myth. No different than things like the Opt-Tions, the Silver Sorcerer, or the Star Eaters. Fairy tales and stories told to stupid children. Whenever he’d heard of a warrior boasting that they’d actually managed to find and defeat a Namekian he had always been quick to dismiss it. A lie… that was all it was. A stupid pathetic lie. Some other green skinned alien or another one with pointed ears. Frieza just jumping at shadows… not that even he would dare muttered those words aloud.

Eventually he’d been more willing to accept that there were such things as Namekians. That they were real… but he decided that they didn’t really matter. There were so few of them, after all. The theory he and Nappa… that he had come up with was that they were a race just like the Saiyans, nearly wiped out. Frieza apparently had a thing for nearly extinct species and wanted to add to his collection. That was all.

Then he’d faced one on Earth…

Vegeta ran his hand along his jaw as he walked along the alien world. He still remembered how hard that damn Namekian had struck him. He had been able to battle him while in his Great Ape form… he should have been reduced to a smear on the ground and while he had been manhandled all the same it hadn’t been as quick as Vegeta would have liked.

‘I thought that was the only reason why Frieza wanted the Namekian. Another warrior to add to his ranks. Possibly as a replacement for me.’ He balled his hand into a fist. ‘As if anyone could replace me!’

But now he knew that wasn’t the case. Not at all. Frieza was after something else entirely: The Dragon Balls.

‘The ability to make any wish I desire. To have whatever I want. To be made immortal so that I can finally defeat Frieza. To take his empire and make it my own… yes. I can’t let such a power fall into Frieza’s hands. He’d waste it… it belongs to me!’

He smirked as he got closer to the village.

‘And I start right now.’

“Who goes there?” a guard called out, suddenly snapping to attention at the sight of him. Or at least Vegeta thought he was a guard… he wasn’t entirely sure. And he didn’t entirely care. Ever since his battle of Earth he had managed to unlock a new ability: he could sense energy. It was a delightful little technique, one that meant he’d been able to shatter the scouter he’d been given and had been a tool he’d used for much of his life. It was now nothing when compared to himself.

“I am Vegeta, Prince of All Saiyans… and I wish to speak with whoever rules over this village.”

“I do not rule over any village,” an elder Namekian said, making his presence known. He was a squat thing, barely reaching Vegeta’s waist, and thicker than the other Namekians. Not quite fat but not lean and trim like those around him. “I watch over the village and its inhabitants, guiding them with the knowledge I have gathered during my long life and helping add to our numbers.”

Vegeta fought the urge to roll his eyes at that. ‘There is one on everyone planet. Some grandiose bastard who thinks that the world wants to hear their rambles. Their proclamations about who they were and what they did and all that other useless pathetic garbage that didn’t matter in the slightest. That only wasted time.’

“Well,” he said aloud, “I suppose you are the one I need to speak to. See… I have heard tales of Namekians during my travels… and of the power you and your kind possess. I should I say the ITEM of power that you possess.”

“Ah… the Dragon Balls,” the old Namekian nodded at that, then shaking his head slightly, eyes drifting shut. For a moment Vegeta wondered if the old bastard had fallen asleep but then he let out a long sigh. “Are you here to ask about it… or take it?”

“Well… that depends entirely on you,” Vegeta said, taking a step forward only for two younger Namekians to move in front of him. “Oh, are you two going to try and stop me? I would suggest you don’t. The path I’ve walked is littered with the dead men that thought they would be the first to defeat Prince Vegeta.”

“It is the darkness in your heart that makes us move against you,” the older Namekian stated. “We can not allow the power of the Dragon Balls to fall into the hands of one such as yourself. Our only choice then is your defeat.”

“No… you had many choices,” Vegeta said with a dark smile. “So just remember that what happens next… it was your decision.”

With that he leapt into battle.

~MC~MC~MC~

Chichi glanced over at Gohan as he played with some of the Namekian children. Or rather they all thought it was play. But thanks to the last 13 months she could see the antics of the children for what they truly were: Training.

One of the adult Namekians would send out rings of Ki, just a bit smaller than a hula hoop, and dare the children to fly through it. They were at different angles and different heights, forcing the children to learn how to quickly change their flight path. And the adult Namekian would also put rings close together, meaning that the children had to watch out for each other or end up slamming into someone else.

“Your son has a calm temperament,” Larin said, walking up to her. “I can sense that he has very strong emotions though… but he knows how to control them rather well.”

“Yes,” Chichi said. “He gets that from his father, not me.” Or, at least, that’s how it used to be. Chichi had known that she was far more emotional than Goku, especially when it came to anger. Her husband could get mad, of course, but he rarely did so. People only truly needed to feel fear when they pressed him too much to make the anger finally burst out. That was when terrible things tended to happen. But for Chichi… well, she knew her reputation and had accepted that people would always see her as the angry house wife.

‘Except that isn’t quite how it is anymore,’ she thought, feeling her tail lightly squeeze around her middle. ‘The control I have now over the Great Ape form and the return of my tail… it also has given me far greater control over my emotions.’ She would still fly off the handle at times but even Goku had commented that she seemed more at peace… though that didn’t mean she couldn’t bring out her rage. In fact Goku sometimes liked it, especially in the bedroom…

She mentally smacked herself. No use thinking about that, especially with Goku no longer in their dimension.

“He could be a Namekian,” Larin commented. “We must also control our emotions. They can be very volatile and cause many problems if we do not understand the mastery of them. As you…” and there his cheeks turned slightly purple, a Namekian version of a blush, “…saw when you arrived.”

“You were protecting your home from strange creatures. That is a noble thing.”

“Perhaps. But I spoke out of turn against Elder Sax… I shouldn’t have done that, especially when he countered my mistake. I have much to work on… but that, I suppose, is true for all Namekians. For both the Warrior and Dragon Tribes.”

Chichi frowned at that. “Elder Sax mentioned that. I must admit I don’t understand what they are or the difference.” She shifted, grimacing. “I’m sorry but that must have sounded terribly offensive-“

“It was,” Larin said but he flashed her a smile. “But I understand the confusion. And as I said I am… trying to work on my temper.” Chichi flashed him a grateful smile at that and watched as Tien, Krillin, and Yamcha showed off with a trio of Namekian adults just what they could do. Senza was talking with Elder Sax, Isco nearby as well, offering his own… charming… opinions. Thought she had to admit that some of his comments felt… forced.

‘He misses Kayos,’ she thought sadly.

“Namekians,” Larin began, drawing Chichi’s thoughts back to the moment, “can be divided into two different tribes: the Warrior Tribe and the Dragon Tribe. There is nothing physically different between the two of us, as I hear is the case with many other races. Rather it is all about how we use our Ki. The Warrior Tribe is just that: warriors. We were once rather rare and even now the other clan outnumbers us 15 to 1. But our abilities are focused on fighting. Using Ki to battle. This village trains Warrior Tribe Namekians and thus why there are so many of us here… but there are villages that do not have a single Warrior Tribe member.”

Chichi nodded at that. “So the Warrior Tribe is what we are most used to… similar to warriors on Earth.”

“I believe so, yes. The Dragon Tribe is more focused on other methods of Ki use. It can come in many forms… if there were more of us I dare say that we would begin dividing them into Sub Tribes. The Healers. The Water Masters. The Energy Gatherers. But, as it is now, we are forced to teach every member of the Dragon Tribe how to use all the different methods of Ki use.”

“Larin,” Chichi said slowly, carefully. She understood what she was about to ask next might be a tender subject for the warrior. “Elder Sax mentioned the Demon Tribe?”

Larin frowned at that and for a moment… just a moment… she saw a glimmer of rage fill him. But just as quickly as it appeared Larin smothered it down. “The Demon Tribe is what the elders call Namekians who become corrupted. Who allow darkness into their hearts. A bastardization of our noble ways.”

‘That’s what happened with King Piccolo,’ Chichi thought, glancing over at Senza. ‘When he and Kami separated all of the darkness within Senza caused King Piccolo to turn from a Dragon Tribe Namekian to a Demon Tribe.’

Thinking about King Piccolo as not a warrior was so very odd for Chichi. He had been a powerful fighter yes… but he had also shown abilities that Piccolo never had. It made her shudder to think about how bad things could have been if King Piccolo had been a member of the Warrior Tribe; it was very likely none of them would have still been alive in that kind of world.

“I have… one other question,” she said, glancing away from Senza. “Is it possible for a Namekian to change what kind of Tribe they follow?”

Larin shook his head. “No, it isn’t.”

“That… isn’t true,” Elder Sax said, walking up to Larin.

That caused the Namekian to stare at the Elder in shock. “Elder, these are outsiders! We can not discuss with them-“

“They brought home a Lost Hope,” Elder Sax told him firmly. “A Warrior who did that in the past was honored greatly. They deserve the same honor.”

“They are outsiders though,” Larin argued.

“It’s okay, I didn’t mean to offend-“ Chichi began but Elder Sax shook his head, shooting Larin a disappointing look. Honestly Chichi thought that he would have preferred anger over that gaze, so filled with disappointment.

“They brought one of us home. That makes them honorary Namekians.” Larin leaned back before quickly rising and walking away, refusing to say another word. Elder Sax watched him walk off and shook his head. “That poor boy.”

“He seemed… really nice when I was talking to him,” Chichi stated.

“Larin has his issues but we all hope he can work through them. He is very protective of all of us and takes a long time to truly trust others. He knows that he needs to work on his anger though… it leads him down dark paths.” Elder Sax shook his head sadly before looking to Chichi. “He was discussing the Tribes with you?”

“The three, yes. I asked him if it was possible for one to change their Tribe.”

“Because of the Dragon Balls,” Elder Sax said, much to Chichi’s surprise.

“I told him everything,” Senza admitted, walking up. “It would not have been right for me to lie to them.”

“And it is appreciated,” Elder Sax stated. “You have come a long way, Senza… you made mistakes but you have also sought to learn from them. Your one half, Piccolo, was even moving towards returning to who he was supposed to be. Be proud of that.” Senza shifted awkwardly at the praise, clearly unsure how to handle it. “Though I would suggest not mentioning such things to others like Larin… they wouldn’t understand. The younger Namekians… they have only known peace. Not the horrors of the Great Drought or the dangers of the outside world.

“But… you wished to know about the Tribes. There is a way for one to switch their Tribes.” He settled down next to her. “We Namekians are able to influence the eggs we produce. To will them in a way into what form we wish them to take. We tend not to though… it is a cruelty to the child. It prevents from becoming their own Namekian. They are… forced to be what we make them. Only in the greatest of tragedies has it been allowed.”

He looked down, gathering himself, and as he did so Chichi thought of the sons of King Piccolo. The twisted creatures he had created in his attempt to defeat Goku. She hadn’t really thought of it but now, with all they had learned about Namekians, she saw exactly what he meant: they hadn’t been given a childhood. Hadn’t been allowed to play and grow and learn. They had been born adults and told to kill… and had died.

Senza pressed a hand to his face.

“But… each of the Dragon Tribe do have one ability: reincarnation. We are able to produce eggs that hold all that we are… every memory, every skill. It is a way for us to continue on long past death. I myself will reincarnate in a few years, when my time nears its end.”

And at once Chichi understood. “You can choose to make your reincarnation a Warrior.”

“We can,” Elder Sax said. “And the warriors produced… are mighty. Far greater than any Warrior born. But… there is a cost: a Warrior can not reincarnate.”

“They… can’t?” she found herself asking, looking to where Larin had walked off.

“Yes. Larin, along with the three warriors training with your friends, were once Dragon Tribe, born after the Great Drought… and born adults in their first lives. They were needed to help care for the children, the ones given the gift of youth and choice. Eventually they decided that they would be the first Warrior Tribes of the New Namekians; Lord Guru had instilled in them the need to protect our home and it was only by being warriors that they felt they could do it. A great honor… for them and for us. But… a great cost. This will be their last life.”

“Well…” Chichi said softly. She… honestly didn’t know what to say. Humans knew that they only had one life… a possible chance at a second with the Dragon Balls. But that was it. But Namekians could live forever… unless they sought out power.

A great cost indeed.

“But,” Elder Sax said, “you were incorrect about the Tribes… there are four of them.”

“F-four?” Chichi said, startled.

“Indeed. The rarest tribe… only one born every generation… until now.” He looked to Senza. “Though you were not born but a fusion of two… something that must be brought up to Lord Guru. The Dragon Warrior-“

But before he could continue on Elder Sax suddenly looked up.

As did Chichi.

And Senza.

And everyone else.

A shiver of dread filled them all.

~MC~MC~MC~

“You know,” Vegeta said as he placed his boot on the chest of one of the Namekian fighters that had tried to challenge him, smirking as he stared down the second. That Namekian was panting hard, hand pressed against his chest, blood leaking from his mouth. “When you two decided to challenge me I thought that, perhaps, you might at least give me a nice warm up. Give me a chance to stretch my muscles after I spent so long crammed into my pod flying here. But sadly you have proven to be no different than all the other so-called heroes that have stood in my path.”

With that he drew his foot back and kicked the first Namekian hard in the ribs, feeling them shatter even as the fighter flew into his companion, smashing him right off his feet. Vegeta merely rolled his neck before walking forward, barely glancing at the cowering little wretches that were watching the fight.

“Oh, did you think this would go differently?” he taunted the frightened little snails. “Dream that your grand protectors would be able to drive me back? That their pathetic little moves-“

Another Namekian adult suddenly leapt out of his hiding spot behind some crates, extending his arms in an attempt to grab Vegeta. But the Prince merely smirked before he moved so fast that an afterimage was created. He got to watch in delight as his attacker still swung at the spot where he had been while Vegeta, now behind him, waited for him to realize that his punch had hit nothing before he darted forward, driving his elbow into the Namekain’s spine. The fighter cried out, arching back, and Vegeta roared in delight as he began to violently pummel him with punches and kicks. When the Namekian tried to dart away Vegeta wrapped his fingers around his bald head and pulled back, causing him to scream even more before Vegeta savagely drove his fist into his side, feeling bones shatter and organs rupture before he tossed him with the others.

“-would be able to stop me?” He looked about, lips curling back so all of the them could see his teeth. “Adorable. Its like being mauled by a pack of newly born puppies.”

“You will pay for this!” another Namekian roared, rushing him. Vegeta though merely waited for the last moment before he shifted to his right, letting the Namekian pass him before he drove his elbow-

Another Namekian that he had missed kicked him right in the chin, snapping his head back, allowing the first one to spin around and drive his fist right into Vegeta’s stomach.

He didn’t even flinch.

“Now tell me… when exactly am I going to begin paying?” Vegeta didn’t bother to lower his head, still staring at the sky. He could feel the Namekian that had punched him tremble as he realized just how foolish and stupid he had been. The dawning horror of just what he was facing.

It was… glorious.

The first Namekian that had tried to rush him let out a scream of fury and began to punch him over and over again while the second moved to grab him from behind, restraining him.

“Oh, are you trying to tickle me to death?” Vegeta taunted. “I know… you want to help me digest my meal with a belly rub!”

“Shut up you bastard!”

“Now now… my father was married to my mother when he had me.” And then Vegeta snapped his head back, causing the Namekian who was holding him to scream in pain, clutching at his face. He waited for the next blow and then tensed his muscles in his abdomen, causing the Namekian punching him to break his hand. “But I suppose I shouldn’t be too angry… after all…” He grabbed the Namekians and slammed their heads together. “I can be a rather violent bastard.” He turned his head from right to left, scoffing at all he saw. “Is there anyone else you want to send at me, old man?” Vegeta demanded, walking up to the wrinkled Namekian. “I think there is a spot over there for another body. After that I’ll need to begin stacking them up like firewood.”

“We will fight you all, if we have to,” the old Namekian retorted. “We can not allow one such as yourself to ever claim the Dragon Ball!”

“A fair and just stance,” Vegeta said before suddenly rushing forward and driving his fist into the old man’s stomach, fingers digging into his entrails. “Too bad this is the real world and not some fairytale.” He leaned in close. “Fairness and justness are just myths.”

With that he ripped his hand free and the old man fell to the ground, the rest of the village staying silent for only a moment more before they began to scream in utter horror and panic, running away as fast as they could.

“Weaklings,” Vegeta muttered as he began to tear through the village, firing Ki blasts at the buildings so he might find his prize. It took several minutes but finally he came up with the Dragon Ball, grinning as he held the large orb. “Perfect! And according to the legends there are 7 of them. That means I need to just find the other six… and with the way these fools were guarding them I bet that I’ll find more in the other villages. That will-“

He stopped, suddenly twisting his head towards the sky.

He was supposed to have time! He was supposed to be able to tear through the planet with ease! How… how had he arrived…

“No….” he whispered as he realized that all his plans had just been shattered.

~MC~MC~MC~

Chiaotzu suddenly started, looking up at the sky. “What… what is that?” he whispered.

“What’s what?” Bulma said just as a proximity alarm began to blare in their ship. “Whoa! We have several ships that suddenly just appeared above Namek! What the heck are they?” The four of them had been debating if they should head into the village, since according to Isco they seemed friendly enough. But that discussion was put on hold as they found themselves staring up at the sky.

“The ships seem to have designs that match up with the armor that the Saiyans wore,” Isco stated, focusing up at the sky.

“You can see that far up?”

“I see everything,” Isco said. “…well, not everything. I don’t feel like seeing how you puss bubbles reproduce or expel your waste. I see what I wish to see but that doesn’t sound good while I am leading my army of robotic brothers and sisters into battle to enslave all organic life. Even for us robots there is a need for a bit of dramatic flair.” He paused, still studying the sky. “There are three ships, two smaller than the others. Disc shaped and honestly I’m not quite for sure how they manage to fly but then again I’m not quite sure how any of us fly. Especially me unless the world knows my grandeur and allows me flight because it knows how dangerous I am and allows me to leave.”

Bulma mostly tuned Isco out at that point; she had a feeling his rambling was more because, even though he’d never admit it, he was terrified by what had arrived.

“Raditz… is that what I think it is?” Bulma asked.

The Saiyan in question had gone utterly quiet. Not panicked… just very quiet.

And that was terrifying.

“It is,” he said, eyes never leaving the sky.

~MC~MC~MC~

High above the planet Namek the three Sleet-Class Ships waited, hovering about the innocent-looking planet.

“We have arrived ahead of schedule, Lord Frieza,” Zarbon said as he entered the room.

“I told you that only bringing two battalions along with my personal forces would work out well for us,” Frieza stated. “Shaved off several days of travel.” He chuckled softly. “And you wanted to bring the Ginyus…”

“I am… still concerned about what we might face down there.”

“Oh? Thinking that our forces can’t cut it? Should that be the case then perhaps those that are handling their training should be replaced…”

Considering that Zarbon was one who hired the trainers he quickly shut his mouth.

“Besides… our men will be motivated to handle this rather quickly and efficiently… it wouldn’t look good if I showed them up.”

“If… you…?”

“Yes,” Frieza said, tail twitching. “I have decided that I will be taking the lead in gathering the Dragon Balls.”

“…of course, Lord Frieza.”

The Emperor didn’t even bother to acknowledge Zarbon’s retreat as he stared down at the planet.

‘Soon immortality will be mine. And after that… the universe.’

Chapter Text

Hercule Satan slowly eased himself out of bed, years of practice of moving without disturbing the sheets allowing him to slink off the mattress with a nimbleness that he knew would surprise many people who didn’t watch him fighting in the ring. Everyone saw him and just assumed he got by with his strength but Hercule was also quick on his feet and rather limber as well. He prided himself on that; being able to move like a jungle cat. It was what allowed him to defeat so many of his foes who tended to be far bigger and bulkier.

He took a single step only to hear a murmur.

“That was good… I didn’t even feel you get up.”

“Miguel!” he exclaimed only to drop his voice to a whisper. “you’re supposed to be sleeping.”

“I did sleep,” she assured him as she slowly got up, smiling at him with half closed eyes and a lazy smile. “And now I’m awake.”

“But-“

“Herc,” she said, reaching out with her right hand and stroking his arm. “I’m fine. I don’t need 16 hours of sleep anymore.”

Hercule shook his head. “We don’t know that-“

“I do,” she said, cutting him off. “Its working, Hercule. Just like Avo Kayos told you… its working. I can feel it.”

He didn’t dare hope.

Even though the Brief Family had gone over how the medicine worked, to the point that he’d gotten them to take him down to the lab to show him how they made it (granted it included so much technical stuff that he’d been utterly lost). Even though he had been assured there would be doctors nearby in case anything went wrong. Even though said doctors gave Miguel a daily checkup.

Even though everything seemed to be going RIGHT…

Hercule didn’t dare hope.

Hope was the silent killer. The one that crept up to you and slit your throat.

And yet he couldn’t’ deny what he was seeing with his own eyes. His darling wife, who had only 2 months ago been so weak she barely could keep her eyes open when she did manage to wake up, was sitting up in bed. Her cheeks had color again. Her voice wasn’t a whisper. The shadows under her eyes had lessened and while she had always had sharp features her face was no longer so thin that he could see every vein just under her skin.

She was getting better.

“Listen here, Herc,” she said, giving his wrist a squeeze, “I know you are worried-“ and of course she had read his thoughts and known what he was thinking… she was so smart, “-but I don’t need you to coddle me. I am grateful for all you’ve done for me but I don’t need you to waste your time being fearful anymore. What I need you to do now is to just be there for me.”

“I know, I just-“

She leaned over and he quickly moved to catch her, afraid she was falling, only for Miguel to easily support herself and kiss his nose.

“I’m fine,” she said. “Though if you want to help there are plenty of things you can do.”

“Like what?” he said quickly, eager to help her with whatever she needed.

“Tell me that this place has a decent shower.”

That made Hercule laugh. “The water gets very hot and the pressure is great. The tub is large too, almost like a hot tub, and-“

“I’m not interested in the tub,” Miguel replied with a teasing tone, rolling back to her side of the bed so she could more easily get up. Hercule leapt over the bed in a single bound, landing on his feet and spinning to face her so he could help her up, much to her clear amusement.

“Perhaps it would be better. You can lie back and relax-“

She cut him off again, flashing a steely look even as she smiled. “I am not lazy like you.”

It was an old joke amongst them. Hercule far preferred his baths; being able to lounge in the tub, feeling the heat soak through all his muscles. When he’d been younger and training it had meant curling up in a tiny tub but recently they’d redone their bathroom and given him a tub big enough to lounge in. And he had all his soaps and shampoos he loved to use. One that scented the water (NOT bubble bath as Miguel loved to tease him), one that could make it fizz if he needed a bit more of a tingle. Shampoos for his hair and each one had a different area of expertise. As he had explained to his bemused wife, back when they were dating and she’d seen his bathroom (and assumed that he was dating someone on the side) hair on the head was different from beard and mustaches which was different from body hair. Each one needed a different type of shampoo and conditioner. Same with his bathing gels; he wasn’t going to use the same soap he used on his feet on his face!

It was the reason why, despite the two of them having a very active sex life before her illness, they’d only attempted to make love in the shower ONCE. When he’d see her use the same washcloth to scrub her face that she’d used on her armpits…

He repressed a shudder.

“Do you need me to wait for you to finish?” he asked.

“I’ll be fine,” she said before letting out a low whistle as she looked over the bathroom. “Okay… I know I’ve been in and out of it but…”

Hercule understood what she was getting at. The bathroom was bigger than their first apartment and definitely more expensive. The first time he’d stepped in there he’d been afraid to touch the hot and cold knobs on the sink, scared to death he’d break something. It wasn’t gaudy, which was nice, but it was VERY well done. Like the finest hotels.

‘And this is just the guest room,’ he thought.

When he’d agreed to join up with what was being called the Z Initiative he’d assumed it would mean leaving his family for a few months to… well, he didn’t really know. Perhaps it would be like the National Guard. Go and train a few weekends out of the year and then be on his merry way, back to his normal life. But instead Avo Kayos and Bulma Brief had set him up at Capsule Corp along with the other members of the team. Told him to bring his family along. That Capsule Corp would be delighted. He hadn’t been sure about that but his need to be there to watch over Miguel and Videl… even if he could afford now to pay for a 24/7 nurse he still preferred to be there…

“Was that chair always there?” she asked, pointing to the seat in the shower.

“Yes,” he assured her. “It wasn’t put in for just you.”

Miguel nodded after a moment. “Okay then. Can you get my C-Pod? I want to-“

Hercule merely wagged his finger, shaking his head. “Say what song you want.”

“huh?”

“Say what song you want.”

Miguel pressed her lips together. “Dancing In the Moonlight.”

At once the song began to play.

“You can also tell it if you want lyrics or instrumental,” he said and he was rewarded with a beaming smile as Miguel realized just what was being offered.

“I might never leave,” she said as she flicked her reddish brown hair over her shoulder. “Though…” she tugged on the strands, “I might not be able too. Ugh, I need this taken care of NOW.”

Hercule chuckled and stepped out of the bathroom, the door shutting just as Miguel began to sing. While not as strong or powerful as he was used to it still made him feel SO much better to hear her be able to sing again.

‘No matter what they are payin’ me… takin’ this job was worth it,’ he thought as he began to get dressed.

The money was wonderful, of course. It gave him a chance to finally give his family a bit of stability. While they had never been starving there had been plenty of times where the need to constantly go to tournaments or put on shows had resulted in Hercule not being there for his family. But the Z Initiative meant he was always there and knew where they were. Clean clothing that was washed after only one time being worn instead of making it last by scrubbing stains out in the sink and spraying cheap cologne on it. Buying actually school supplies instead of relying on handouts or discount sales.

But… the fact that Miguel was getting better, regaining her strength?

That made it all worth it.

Stepping out into the hall he made his way to the stairs, taking them two at a time as he jogged towards the kitchen…

“Daddy!” Videl called out… not that Hercule could see her. She was hidden behind a tower of pancakes. “Mrs. Brief made us breakfast!”

“So please help yourself, there is plenty to go around!” Mrs. Brief declared happily, gesturing at the multiple stacks of pancakes that were waiting for him. “I so do miss cooking for others.”

“It is delightful to have the house full, isn’t it?” Dr. Brief said from where he sat at the table, reading through a newspaper while slowly alternating between feeding himself and his cat bites of pancakes.

Hercule shook his head, knowing there was no way he would be able to get out of a big filling breakfast. The Brief family had been very open from the moment he had shown up with Videl and Miguel that they were to treat the compound as their home. And it wasn’t the snooty aristocratic way of saying it either… they weren’t proclaiming that they should “treat it like home” and then looking down on them for any minor mistake. No… Dr. Brief and his wife had gone out of their way to make him and his family feel welcome.

Movie nights, as in the Brief family having a giant theater with a concessions stand and even bringing a bed in for Miguel to lie in so she could enjoy the movie too. Playing pool with Dr. Brief as he explained how Avo’s friends were able to ‘manipulate the energy of the world’; he still was a bit leery of that but at least having a scientific explanation assured him it wasn’t a scam. Swimming lessons for Videl… and for Hercule as he tended to flounder around a bit. Mrs. Brief and the little girl making sugar cookies and then helping her decorate them. Dr. Brief insisting that they go buy some new clothes on his dime because he wanted to work on his weather machine and it might get cold (and Hercule would never forget Videl’s squeals at seeing snow for the first time).

“Now then, Videl, are you ready to help me down in the lab today?” Dr. Brief asked. “The tutor droids tell me that you are well ahead in your studies so you have earned a fieldtrip!”

“Yes!” Videl said with a mouth full of pancake, only to quickly swallow when she caught her father staring at her. “I mean… yes Dr. Brief.”

Hercule smiled at that, walking over to Mrs. Brief and whispering, “Thank you again for all your help with Videl. I know she’s an energetic little demon at times.”

“Oh, think nothing of it!” Mrs. Brief said. “We’re delighted to have her.”

Hercule nodded at that, smile softening a touch. “You know… I didn’t know my parents, growing up. I have no idea who they are… if they are even still out there. Honestly I don’t mind either way… I have no desire to see them. Nothin’ bad, ya know? Just… they would be strangers to me.” He selected a plate of pancakes and began to cut into the top most layer, standing at the bar watching as Videl and Dr. Brief discussed what they would do that day. “I don’t mind but I always regretted Videl not havin’ grandparents. Miguel’s folks… well, they ain’t grandparent material. And I always wished that Videl could have a grandma and a grandpa to talk to. Course, you’re too young ta be a grandmother-“

“Oh nonsense,” Mrs. Brief said with a wave of her hand. “You can flatter me all you wish but you can’t change things.” He looked at her and she smiled quite happily. “I’m aging VERY gracefully” Hercule huffed at that. “Honestly I’m glad you brought it up… I know my husband has been wondering when he should approach you about Videl… even after Bulma and her friends come back he wants to stay in contact with all of you.”

“I’d like that a lot,” Hercule said just as Launch entered the kitchen.

“Ah, Launch!” Dr. Brief said. “Come for some breakfast?”

“Yeah and thanks,” she said with a nod, grabbing a plate and settling down next to Videl who, to Hercule’s amusement, was staring at the woman with clear hero worship. “Hey squirt, how are ya?”

“Good!” Videl said with a beaming grin. “Dr. Brief and I are going to play around with plants!”

“Plants, huh?”

“Well, Avo did ask us to look into the Senzu Beans, to see if I could find a way to make them a bit more hearty.”

“Won’t work,” Yajirobe stated as he shuffled in and grabbed two plates of pancakes, sitting just so he was out of Launch’s eyeline; the woman and leader of the Z Initiative had told him if she had to watch his disgusting table manners one more time the only way he’d be eating would be via a feeding tube. “Korrin has to be very careful with the Senzu beans, so they don’t wither. That’s what gives them their healing properties.”

“Oh I understand that,” Dr. Brief said. “I won’t be able to fully replicate them. However I am hopeful that I might be able to create a lesser form.”

“A lesser form?” Launch asked.

Dr. Brief nodded, setting his newspaper down. “The Senzu Beans can do amazing things but sometimes you don’t need amazing. Sometimes simply good is, well, good enough.”

“Like throwing a punch that knocks someone back vs. knockin’ them out?” Hercule asked.

“Exactly!” Dr. Brief declared. “Avo complained, rather frequently and forcefully, that the Z Fighters rely too much of the Senzu Beans for the most minor of scraps. He wants to develop something that would be useful for healing but wouldn’t work on major injuries… something that would help the body repair after an intense workout but not also leave you full for a few days.”

Hercule considered that. He knew that the Senzu Bean had been part of the regiment that had helped Miguel but he could also see where having a smaller, weaker version of it would be very helpful. Some might have seen it as cheating but was it cheating to drink a sports drink to replenish you? Or to eat a pasta meal before a big fight to load up on carbs? He didn’t think so.

“Still think you’ll fail,” Yajirobe stated before tucking into his food.

“Oh, its entirely possible. But failure is the best teacher.”

“What do you mean?” Videl asked, brow furrowing at that.

“Well, take your father for example,” Dr. Brief said. “He didn’t master each of his moves instantly. He had to train… and many times he made mistakes that he needed to correct. The same is true of me and my work!”

“Oh… I guess that makes sense,” Videl said.

“Launch, will all of you be training all day?” Mrs. Brief asked. “Because I was thinking it might be fun to do a bit of shopping…”

“Hey, I’m game,” Launch said. “We need to be ready in case something does attack but I’m all for a bit of splurging.”

“Which will leave me and Yajirobe to do the trainin’ for ya!” Hercule declared.

“Uh… what?” Yajirobe said, looking up at Hercule as he moved to join the others at the table.

“Come on now, you must have gained a few kilos since ya came to stay here! We need to work that weight off.”

“I have not!” Yajirobe declared only for Launch to snicker.

Hercule smiled as he watched the two feud.

Yes… no matter what might happen next… this was all worth it.

~MC~MC~MC~

“You thought that you could stand against me? Thought you had any chance of being able to defeat me. Well, don’t you feel foolish now?”

Emperor Pilaf sneered as he looked down at his hated foe… which was only possible because he’d commanded Mai to lift him up so he was above them. Still, he was looking down upon them and that was all that mattered.

“Everything you believed was a lie and now with this most sacred of texts I have gained full control of this situation! You have no choice but to obey my command!” He threw back his head and laughed.

His hated foe… blew a bubble before sighing.

“Sir, this receipt is outdated.”

At once Pilaf stopped laughing.

“Wha… what?”

“It clearly states that it was from last year. Our return policy is 90 days with receipt.”

“…no! I refuse to accept that!”

“Boss?” Shu said, looking up at Pilaf. “Maybe we should just take the store credit. After all we shop here all the time.”

“He is right,” Mai added. “We don’t want to be banned like we were from WcDonalds.”

Pilaf sputtered at that. “That wasn’t my fault, Shu!”

“You didn’t wear shoes, sir,” Shu reminded him.

“My feet were sweaty! They needed to breathe!”

“Sir,” the MalWart clerk said with a sigh, “there are other customers waiting.”

“And they will wait until you return this damaged copy of Battle Bouncers 2: The Bouncening!” Pilaf demanded, wiggling his legs in outrage. “It has a scratch on it!”

“I-“

But then another voice cut in. “I would be willing to buy that DVD off of you for full price… assuming you agree to join me for lunch.”

Pilaf tried to twist around to look at who was talking but, thanks to the way Mai was holding him, he couldn’t see well. He wiggled to try and shift in her grasp but that caused Mai to gasp and suddenly her hands spasmed and sent him crashing on top of her before he fell and landed on Shu’s head before dropping to the floor himself. The result was all three of them lying there in front of the service desk, groaning and shaking their heads before they looked up and stared at the man that had approached them.

He was about as non-descript of a man as one could find. Tall with dark hair and a long face, he was wearing a black suit and holding a briefcase in his hand. He also, Pilaf noticed, had a wad of zeni in his hand.

“Uh… who will pay for lunch?” Pilaf asked.

“I will, of course.”

He turned and pointed at the service desk worker. “You have lucked out! But don’t think that I will ever forget this, Miss…”

“None of your business,” the woman said dryly.

“Miss Noneofyourbusiness!” Pilaf got up, dusted himself off, and followed after the suited man, trusting his minions to follow right after him.

Ten minutes later all of them were seated in the WichWay, looking over their 12 inch hoagies and deciding on which end they should bite into first. The only one that wasn’t doing that was the suited man who, much to Pilaf’s surprise, pulled out a fork and knife and began to cut into his sandwich, nibbling on little bites.

‘He might be even more evil than me!’ he thought, forcing himself to puff up a bit so he didn’t let the other man think he was weak. “Well… you were very interested in talking to me… whatever can I do for you Mr…”

“Agent, actually. Agent Mutton. And I wished to speak with you concerning threats to our world.” Mutton reached over and took a sip of his soda (he had been VERY firm that it was called Soda. Never Pop. So very evil) before continuing on. “I don’t know how much you have been paying attention to the world and what has been happening but we are being threatened… by aliens.”

“Aliens?” the anthropomorphic dog ninja said with a laugh, turning to his short demon Emperor who had sought out magical balls that could summon a wish-granting dragon. “Everyone knows that aliens aren’t real!”

“oh, they very much are real. I have been tracking them all my life. Look here.” He pulled out photos of normal looking people, at least to Emperor Pilaf’s eyes. “See… they try to disguise themselves as us but they always fail.”

Mai though leaned forward and stared at the photos, a frown forming as her brow creased due to how intently she was studying the images. “I… don’t see it.”

“Neither do I,” Shu commented, lifting one photo up and twisting it one way and then the other, as if that mere act would suddenly reveal the alien within. “Is it like one of those magic eye things? Do I need to blur my vision so it pops out and I see the sail boat?”

“Or maybe its like Where’s Frollo?” Mai suggested. She practically pressed her nose to the image. “I think… is that… no, that’s a shrub.”

Agent Mutton didn’t seem disturbed at all by the antics of the two. No, he in fact merely smiled. But it wasn’t a kind, sweet smile. The small grin he wore was far more patronizing than that. “I’m not surprised you can’t see it. Only the truly intelligent have any hope of being able to detect these aliens. Its why they are able to hide amongst us so easily.”

At once Pilaf spoke up. “Of course! Of course!” He grabbed one of the photos and, at random, selecting a feature. “The nose on this man! Only an alien can have such a nose!”

Mutton glanced at the photo and slowly nodded. “Indeed. You spotted that rather quickly.”

“Just like I can tell from this man’s ears-“ He jabbed a finger at the photo Shu was still holding, “-and this woman’s… lips.” He waved his hand at Mai’s photo, not even bothering to look at the image.

“Correct on both counts.”

“Of course it is.” He glared at his two minions who at once cringed and shrunk down in their seats. “Without me you two would never be able to do anything right! You’re lucky I am not only intelligent and observant but also forgiving!”

“Y-yes sir!” Shu said, Mai bobbing her head up and down.

Pleased with that Pilaf turned to Agent Mutton. “So then, now that we’ve established just what I can do when it comes to aliens… what is it you wish of me?”

“My associate and I have learned that the company known as Capsule Corp, which you might not be aware of-“

“Oh, they make Capsules, right?” Shu said.

“We know of them,” Mai added.

“Capsule What?” Pilaf said. He swore he’d heard the name before but he tended to forget things rather quickly if they proved of no need for him.

Mutton just continued on as if none of them had interrupted. “-but one that has managed to do some rather… other worldly things.”

“You think that they are secretly aliens?” Shu asked.

“Or that they are using alien technology to make those capsules?” Mai added.

Mutton chuckled at that. “Of course not. Dr. Brief is a genius. However, I have learned that his daughter, Tights, has been in regular contact with an alien menace.” He passed over a photo of a blond girl chatting with a man while smooth skinned alien stood off to the side, looking annoyed.

“Yeah, that guy’s an alien!” Shu declared, pointing at the being in the outlandish outfit.

Mutton though shook his head. “Ah, a common mistake. That is, I believe, one of Dr. Brief’s covert security agents.”

“But… he looks just like an alien!” Shu declared.

“Of course,” Mutton said with a slight shrug. “What better disguise than one so outlandish that people will stop and stare? Because they would never think someone trying to avoid staring would want people to stare at them so they would go with an outfit that would clearly make them something for the people to stare at even as they avoided the true stares of those trying to stare at them… often from stairs.”

“…say ‘stare’ again,” Mai said.

Pilaf, not wanting to upset their meal ticket, er, friend, er… meal ticket… spoke up quickly. “That makes perfect sense to me!”

Mutton pointed at the man Tights was talking to. “He, however, has all the traits of an alien invader.”

“…right!” all three said, having figured out the game (though, admittedly, Pilaf was beginning to actually believe Mutton).

“Capsule Corp,” Mutton said as he collected the photos, “is clearly harboring alien life. At best it is because they have been tricked into believing that they are innocents, deluded by the false tales of them being stranded and needing aid. At worst they have sold out humanity in order for them to be the last ones that need to go down and work in the acid mines.”

“Oh, I don’t like the sound of that at all!” Mai said.

“Yeah… work.” Pilaf shuddered.

Mutton nodded once more. “I have approached you three because I wish for your help in dealing with this menace. My associate and I are looking for strong, capable people that can help us in taking out this alien threat.”

“This all seems… rather impressive,” Pilaf stated. “But what do we get out of it.”

“You serve your planet in its time on need.”

“…what do we get out of it?”

“The feeling that you have done a grand and noble thing.”

“…what… do… we… get… out… of… it?”

Mutton seemed utterly undisturbed by the demands Pilaf was making. “Of course, we can’t expect any of you to assist as you currently are. Which is why we will be providing you with the latest weapons and gadgets available.”

Shu and Mai instantly perked up. “Weapons?” the two asked.

“Of course. Ones capable of easily taking out those alien invaders. Powerful ones.”

“And we’ll get to keep them?” Shu asked slowly.

“Or you’ll leave them someplace where we can easily steal them… not that we would do that!” Mai flashed a charming smile.

“Of course,” Mutton said. “One never knows when another alien will attack and I’d rather have you armed and ready.”

“Group huddle!” Pilaf demanded and he along with his minions leapt away from the table, pressing their heads together. “So we get a lot of free weapons out of this… weapons we can use to destroy my enemies.”

“And I bet he’ll keep paying for our food, which is a plus,” Shu added.

“We could finally fumigate the caste, sir,” Mai suggested. “Get the flea problem taken care of?”

“Yes… if he puts us up in some nice hotel we could do that…” Pilaf grinned, as did the two servants, before they all turned back to Mutton. “We are in!”

Mutton smiled and gestured for them all to have a seat. “Very well. That-“

“Hey, I don’t mean to interrupt…”

The four of them all slowly turned to stare at a dark haired teen that was leaning back in his chair so he could talk to them easier.

“…but I couldn’t help but overhear what you were talking about and was wondering if you were accepting more applicants?”

“Are… are you insane?!?” Pilaf screeched. “We were selected because of our greatness! You can’t just barge your way in here and demand to be made a part of this!”

“Huh. I assumed you were picked because no one would miss you if you suddenly disappeared, taken off to be probed.” He slowly looked Pilaf over. “I bet you might even enjoy it.” That caused Pilaf to stiffen before he began to screech and scream, flailing about wildly. But the teen just continued on, not bothered at all by the Emperor’s antics. “And hey, I don’t mind taking that risk if it means free food and a chance to have some fun.”

Mutton considered the boy for only a second. “You’re in.”

“WHAT?!?!” Pilaf, Shu, and Mai cried out, falling out of their chairs.

“The more help we get the more aliens we can defeat,” Mutton reasoned.

“You… but you came to recruit us!” Mai exclaimed.

“And I did recruit you. He’s volunteering.”

“And my sister too,” the teen said… just as the service desk worker that had refused to take back Pilaf’s dvd walked up.

“What have you gotten us into?”

“free room and board to fight aliens.”

The woman shrugged. “Shit, I’m in. Better than dealing with morons who bring in old receipts.”

Pilaf glared at her. “Miss Noneofyourbusiness!”

That made the dark haired teen chuckle. “Oh, did we get a new last name?”

His sister shrugged before taking a seat. “So, fighting aliens, huh?”

“Indeed,” Mutton said, ignoring Pilaf and his sputtering. “Now, if you will follow me…” He rose and the five new recruits quickly joined him, following him out into the MalWart parking lot. “My associate didn’t wish to come inside… he is a touch eccentric like that.”

“Okay, so I know we just met him,” the blond teen said to her brother, “but I assumed you weren’t leading us to a windowless van.” She gestured at the van, very nondescript… which made it a bit more threatening. “If anyone offers us candy I am out.”

“Relax, sis, I’m sure it will be fine,” her brother said.

The side door of the van opened and Mutton gestured for them to get inside. “Normally,” Pilaf stated as he took a seat, “I ride in much more style. I hope this won’t be a recurring thing.”

“Not in the slightest,” Mutton said as he shut the door and moved to the driver seat. His partner remained in the passenger seat, refusing to turn towards them.

“Now, how long should this drive be? Because I might need to take a bathroom break…”

“It will feel like no time passed at all,” the passenger said as Mutton shut the door… and put on a gas mask. The passenger turned to reveal he had on a gas mask too… and Pilaf’s eyes widened as thick fog spilled into the van. Mai, Shu, and the teenagers coughed once or twice before the collapsed but Pilaf struggled, fighting to stay awake… “Yes… these ones will do well.”

The last thing Pilaf heard before darkness took him was Mutton stating, “I am glad you approve, Dr. Gero.”

Chapter Text

“What… what is that power?” Elder Sax said as he looked skyward. The rest of the Namekian Village joined him in staring upward, seeing without seeing the gathering forces that had suddenly appeared above their planet.

“I don’t know but I don’t like it,” Krillin murmured, swallowing as he felt the energy levels increasing. Not in terms of one growing stronger and stronger… that would have been distressing, yes. But Krillin had come to understand, thanks to his training with Rouge, that a sudden display of power didn’t mean that much. Anyone could wastefully shoot off a bit of energy, after all.

But what he was sensing now?

Krillin suddenly flashed back to one of his earliest memories. He had been sitting under a peach tree, happily munching on the fruit, letting the juices dribble all over him without a care in the world. A heap of peach skins had slowly grown around him like leaves falling from the very tree whose shade he had been enjoying. Whenever he had hit upon a pit he had, without a second thought, tossed them far away from him, giggling as they hit the bushes and other trees in the orchard he had snuck into; because he had snuck into the orchard to steal the fruit.

His face has been coated in sticky juice and bits of the pulpy peach meat, belly bloated with fruit to the point that he had ended up just sucking on the fruit, drinking the juice before tossing away the half mauled fruit without a care. He had been an utter sight, with his little shorts clinging to his chubby legs, fat little toes wiggling in delight with each bite, half dazed thanks to the sheer amount of food he had consumed.

The last pit… the very last one… had soared through the air and he’d giggled as it reached a far off tree, striking a bit of bark that had stuck out from the tree like a wart. Only it hadn’t been bark… it had been a bee hive.

The buzz that had filled the air had shaken him from his lethargy, causing him to struggle to his feet and waddle away as fast as he could. But the thrum of the swarm’s wings had continued to grow and Krillin had screamed in a panic as he had raced for shelter, finally managing to find a barn. He had thrown himself him in and laid on the ground, feeling the dirt stick to his skin thanks to all the half-dried juices on his face, his guts cramping from his gluttony and the sudden movement. But he had escaped the swarm and he had laughed, twisting onto his back and kicking his little legs in delight, not even caring that he’d knocked over some rakes.

That is… until one had hit a wasp’s nest.

That was how Krillin felt now, staring up at the sky and feeling more and more and more of the invaders popped into existence and begin to descend upon Namek: a swarm of wasps had been unleashed and now they were coming at him, growing in number as they sensed an easy target.

He wished he was back on Earth. He wished Goku was there. He wished…

‘Stop it,’ he thought. ‘You aren’t a pudgy little baby anymore.’ He balled his hands into fists, jaw tightening. ‘You are a warrior. One of the strongest humans on the planet. Yes, it would be nice if Goku were here but you are no longer the little weakling that is chasing after him, constantly in his shadow. You know things he doesn’t… can do things he can’t! You aren’t his sidekick… you are his equal! And these people, these Namekians, they don’t need Goku… they need you!’

He knew what he needed to do.

“Isco!” he declared forcefully. “Is your other body near Raditz?”

“It… it is,” he stated.

“Contact him.”

“I-“

“Now.”

Isco stared at him for several long moments before giving a sharp nod. “One moment… sir.”

“What is it, Krillin?” Chichi asked as she gathered with the others.

“We can’t just rush off without a plan,” Krillin said. “That’s what got Yamcha killed… I went rushing after Raditz without a single thought. But when we worked with a plan? We took him down with only a few injuries.”

“Hey man,” Yamcha said. “It wasn’t your-“

“Yeah, it was,” Krillin said, shutting his eyes and dropping his head. “Even if you chose to do it. Even if it was Raditz who fired that blast. It was my fault because I went in without a plan. Just like it was your fault. And Tien’s. Chiaotzu. Piccolo and Goku. Even Kayos and that’s only because he didn’t have time to scheme.” He gave a soft laugh. “Yeah… I’ll admit it… Kayos has a point with all his schemes and plots. I might not agree with his plans and how underhanded he gets but maybe it is better to bend a bit if it means that the people we care for are protected.”

“Now you’re thinking like a survivor,” Raditz said via Isco’s speakers. “And we’re going to need to think like survivors. Because that energy you are sensing? That’s the Frieza Force.”

Krillin swallowed hard at that. ‘The Frieza Force. Raditz told us that Frieza is the one that destroyed his and Goku’s home planet. An army filled with the meanest, nastiest, more vicious warriors in the galaxy. And the upper forces… I can tell some of them are twice as strong as we are. Except… for one.’ He focused on one particularly bright yet also wicked energy source. One that he couldn’t help but detect, that did nothing to hide itself, but was also so soaked in evil ki that it made his stomach tremble in agony. ‘Frieza… he’s like a hundred Vegetas.’

“I don’t think I need to tell you all how fucked we are,” Raditz stated. “Even if we had Goku around AND Avo to pull some trick that would most likely get him killed in seconds but also buy us a moment to get off a single attack… Frieza is not someone we have any hope of defeating.”

“Then we don’t worry about defeating him,” Krillin retorted. “Like you said… we need to think like survivors.” He looked to Elder Sax. “I’m sorry… I truly am… but your entire planet is in grave danger.”

“An old enemy?” Larin said darkly, taking a step towards them, hands balled into fists. “Did you bring your war to our planet, invaders?”

“We’ve never even met this Frieza guy!” Yamcha complained. “Raditz has but not the rest of us! And as far as we all know Frieza didn’t know Raditz was with us.”

“As far as you know,” Larin charged, eyes narrowed in anger. “Meaning you most likely DID bring him here-“

“That is enough, Larin!” Elder Sax snapped. “Such words do not help us. It doesn’t matter if they brought this Frieza here or if it was just cruel luck that caused him to arrive when he has… he is here now and if our new friends can aid us then we must hear them out.”

“New friends?” Larin exclaimed, waving his hands of Krillin and the rest of the Z Warriors. “How do we know this isn’t some trick by this Lord Frieza to subjugate us? They come here, their enemy just so happens to arrive at the same time, and now they are the only ones that can “save us”. This Frieza could really be one of their members and this invasion a lie so they can trick us into giving them some reward. Or they lead us into a trap! Have you thought about that?”

Elder Sax stared down the younger Namekian, his face utterly stern. It was such a contrast with the fuming warrior and Krillin saw the Namekians who had been clearly listening to what Larin was claiming had begun to have doubts in the face of Elder Sax’s resolute refusal to even react to his charged claims.

“And have you taken a moment to think at all? Because to me it is clear you have allowed your rage to get the better of you.” He gestured at Krillin and the others. “Can you not sense the goodness in them all? What evil may exist within them is no different than what exists in all of our hearts. No one is pure, Larin… but our new friends-“ Larin flinched at that, “-are not evil. They are soaked in good.

“They clearly came to this world… and I imagine that they could just as easily leave it. Abandon us to our fate. Instead they are willing to stand with us and protect our world. At the very least we can listen to them without accusing them of being allied with this wicked being. One whose energy is so tainted it is making my head spin.”

Though he never raised his voice his condemnation caused the younger Namekian to stand down.

“Now then… what do you suggest?” Elder Sax asked.

Krillin nodded, his mind quickly racing to come up with plans. He knew that of all his friends only Bulma was more educated than him. It was easy to forget but all of them had been raised in the wilds. For the most part abandoned to fend for themselves. Bulma had been schooled by her father and he had been taught by the monks. And while they had been rather cruel (okay, hellish and frustrating and traumatizing so that he still had issues if he heard ritual chanting and smelled burning incense) it had taught him far more than the others. And while his friends weren’t dumb… sometimes they could become far too focused.

“Is there a way to reach the other villages and warn them?”

“They can sense what is coming,” another Namekian pointed out. “Even the smallest child could.”

“But they won’t know how dangerous these new arrivals are,” Elder Sax said, looking at Isco.

Raditz responded. “They will think nothing of slaughtering you all to get what they want. And that is assuming they are kind. There are members of the Frieza Force who just go in for the kill… but there are others that will want to torture and maim even the youngest of you just for their sick enjoyment. The only hope you have if you encounter them and they are too strong to be defeated in battle is to surrender and hope they induct you into their ranks. And that is a BIG if. Frieza has destroyed entire races without taking a single member into his service.”

“No Namekian would ever join with a being such as this Frieza!” one of the villagers called out.

“Then we need to let the other villages know that,” Krillin said. “Do you have any device or magical way to communicate with one another?”

Elder Sax sighed. “Sadly we do not. Messengers are the only way to communicate with one another.”

“Then we need to send the messengers,” Senza stated. “Ones that will know that they must not engage Frieza or his forces unless they have no choice.”

“How many villages are there?” Tien asked, folding his arms over his chest.

“Six villages, counting ours,” Elder Sax said. “So we will need to notify five of them. And Lord Guru.”

“Lord Guru isn’t in a village?” Senza asked.

“No. He keeps his own residence, protected by his chosen successor, Nail.”

Bulma’s voice suddenly chimed in. “is there any place that would be safe for all of you to hide? Hidden caverns or the like?”

Elder Sax considered that. “I am not completely sure, to be honest. But Guru would know.”

Krillin looked to Isco. “Could we safely create a place like that without altering Frieza?”

Isco tilted his head, reclaiming his speakers. “You mean drilling into the bedrock? It is… possible, I suppose. Especially if Frieza is not heading towards us. But if he can sense energy-“

“He can and he can’t,” Raditz stated. “None of the Frieza Force can sense energy unless it is right on top of them, much like Bulma can get a sense that someone who is rather strong has suddenly decided to flare out their aura. He however has scouters.”

“That’s the thing you were wearing, right?” Yamcha asked. “That weird device that went over your ear and eye?”

“Mine was a stripped down version so not to let Frieza eavesdrop on me but yes,” Raditz replied. “Every member of the Frieza Force has one and not only can it detect distant energy but it can measure and filter. If Frieza gets to one Dragon Ball then he can detect the others.”

Krillin frowned at that. ‘So… that will make things more difficult. Frieza has a way to find the Dragon Balls, no different than our Dragon Radar. He just needs to calibrate it… and I don’t know if we have time to hide all the Dragon Balls… of even how to-‘

He blinked, two ideas suddenly striking him in quick succession.

“Raditz,” Krillin said, “the scouters are linked?”

“They pull from the same database,” the Saiyan informed him via Isco’s speaker. “And they have communication features.”

At once Isco straightened. “If someone were to provide me one I could hack it.”

Krillin grinned. “That was what I was thinking. We get a scouter and you take it over. Cripple them completely.”

“Frieza would order more and switch the channel,” Raditz warned. “But it would buy us some time.”

“Which is better than nothing,” Krillin said. “Bulma… the Dragon Radar is wired to detect just the dragon balls?”

“Well… yes, it is.”

“Then it can tell you what energy its giving off?”

“Yeah. You know this Krillin,” she said confused and getting a bit annoyed.

But Krillin didn’t rise to the bait like he normally would have done when Bulma got a bit too huffy. Instead he declared, “Then you should be able to work out how to shield the Dragon Balls.”

“I…” Bulma trailed off and though he couldn’t see her Krillin knew she had gotten a thoughtful look on her face, pondering his suggestion. “I’m not sure if that can be done… after all, the Dragon Balls have been found in caves and the like and the radar was able to detect them.”

“BUT no one ever tried to actively shield them,” he argued.

“That’s true,” she admitted. “If we can get a hold of one…”

“We have one,” Elder Sax stated, much to every member of the Z Warrior’s surprise. The villagers murmured at that, startled by his statement though it was clear to Krillin it was more that he had spoken the words than the knowledge they held. “The Dragon Balls are sacred on our planet. But we understand that sometimes the temptation to use them, even for the most pure hearted, might be too much for even us. Thus we keep them separate, with each village and Lord Guru protecting a single Dragon Ball.” He looked to Isco. “If I brought our Dragon Ball to you would you be able to… shield it… as you suggest?”

“I will try,” Bulma said earnestly.

Tien gave a nod. “And worst case it will make Frieza work to find it. If he figures out the villages have the Dragon Balls he will look there first.”

“Why not take it into space?” Isco suggested. The others looked at him and he let out a sigh. “For once I am not trying to flee from a fight.”

But Yamcha shook his head. “They have space ships and I’m willing to bet they have fire power on those things.”

“They actually don’t,” Raditz stated. “BUT they do have ways of drawing in ships. Ours would be easily be brought inside one and then we’d be done for.”

“So we have to make our stand here,” Chiaotzu commented, clearly considering what that meant.

Krillin turned to Elder Sax. “With your permission I would like you and any villager not going to warn the other villages to go to our ship. You can help us figure out the best place to begin moving all the younger Namekians so they are protected. We can send out messengers to the other villages and also work to try and get one of the scouters.”

“We should also investigate what forces Frieza has brought with him,” Senza stated. “Raditz, am I correct in assuming that the Frieza Force is large enough that you can’t simply tell us who is on the planet?”

“Unfortunately that’s correct. And who he brought with him varies. At minimum Dodoria and Zarbon are with him. The Ginyu Force is a possibility but we need to hope that isn’t the case. Vegeta-“

Raditz suddenly stopped.

“Raditz?” Bulma said over the speaker. “What is it?”

“Vegeta… he’s here too.”

Krillin’s heart sunk but he forced himself to take a breath. “Okay… so we need to send people with the lowest power levels or who are best able to hide it to scout. Chichi, Senza, you two are going to stand out like a sore thumb. Same with Raditz. Chiaotzu, you can draw on Tien’s energy so you’re with us. Isco-“

“Yes, I do believe you are right, as much as I am loathed to admit it,” the robot stated. “My true self will remain behind at the ship while I-“ he gestured at his Fighter Form, “-will go with you.”

“You?” Yamcha said. “Krillin…”

“We need to be as stealthy as possible and I am best hiding my energy,” Krillin stated. “Yamcha-“

“I’m coming with you,” the Bandit said. “I can hide my power level and even if they detect me they won’t see the Kaioken coming.”

“Me too!” Gohan chimed in.

“NO!” Chichi thundered.

“Absolutely not!” Krillin said in agreement.

“But I-“

Chichi though ran right up and hugged him. “Don’t you dare! This is FAR too dangerous for you!”

“But mom!” he whined even as Chichi continued to scold Gohan and tell him that he shouldn’t even THINK of going off anywhere. Krillin felt bad for the kid as he knew that he wanted to help and was desperate to prove he wasn’t the crybaby that he’d been when the Z Fighters had first met him… but…

“Gohan, things are different now,” Senza said calmly. “We brought you to Namek because we believed that we would be able to ask for their help and that would be that. But with Frieza and his forces now here… things have become far more dangerous.”

“But-“

Tien shook his head. “Senza’s right. We’re also down two fighters with Goku and Kayos doing… whatever it is they are doing.”

Gohan muttered… something… but nodded. Krillin turned to the Namekian Elder who, thankfully, hadn’t shown any signs of being upset with their distractions.

“Our own youths are much the same way,” Elder Sax stated before squaring his shoulders. “I will select the messengers and they will set off.”

Senza looked over at Krillin as Elder Sax began to discuss just who would go and to what village. It didn’t miss Krillin’s attention that Larin wasn’t selected, which was probably a good thing. “You are doing well, Krillin.”

“well…” he rubbed the back of his head. “Just trying to do what I think a good leader would.”

“And you are doing it well,” Senza repeated, earning a grin from Krillin.

But that grin fell as he nodded to the others. “Isco, Yamcha… let’s go get Chiaotzu and get started.”

With that the three blasted off, Krillin hoping that his plans would work and they’d be able to avoid Frieza and his forces.

‘Unfortunately,’ he thought, ‘I have no idea what we are going to do once Frieza realizes he can’t collect all the Dragon Balls!’

~MC~MC~MC~

Vegeta snarled as he tore through the remains of the village. “Where is it… where is it…”

Once he had sensed Frieza and his Forces approaching he had realized he didn’t have time to toy with the green little worms that called the planet home. So he had unleashed his full power and made clear that if they didn’t get out of his sight and leave him to his search, or if they tried to stop him, he would just slaughter them all and be done with it. The few remaining Namekians had clearly been angered by that but had realized they had no hope of standing against him and fled.

And now Vegeta was tearing through their homes, looking for-

“Finally!” he proclaimed as he hefted up the large orange orb. “A Dragon Ball… the key to me achieving my wish!” He laughed to himself but only allowed a few moments of pleasure at his success before he began to consider his next move. ‘There is no way that I can take this with me,’ he thought. ‘If there are Seven of these damn things it will be impossible for me to carry them around. I’ll need to hide it somewhere… hmmm…’

Not even bothering to use the door Vegeta blasted his way out of the house, causing it to collapse as he raced away from the village. He didn’t dare fly high, as that would alert Frieza to his presence on the planet and while it was possible he may be able to convince a few of the dumber members of the army that he was there on Frieza’s orders it would get reported soon enough and Frieza would realize the game was up.

‘No… I need to be clever about this,’ he thought. ‘Just like I need to find the perfect place to hide this Dragon Ball. Someplace that won’t be easy for Frieza or his pathetic minions to find… ah, of course!’

With a sharp descent he slammed into the green ocean.

‘Frieza would never think of going to retrieve this ball himself. If it were on dry land and required only the barest amount of effort, perhaps, but not this deep.’ He cut through the water, a bit disappointed that the ocean wasn’t as deep as he would have preferred. It only went down about 20 to 30 meters… he had been hoping it would be at least a hundred. Dark and dangerous so that any that went down there, other than himself, would be instantly crushed. Still, it would work. ‘Zarbon is far too vain to go into this brine and Dodoria can’t swim at all. So they’d have to send a flunkie… and I doubt Frieza brought anyone that can handle even going down this far.’

Coming to the ocean floor Vegeta charged a Ki blast and fired. The water become cloudy as the rock was turned to dust that mixed with the water and he waited a minute more before he nestled the Dragon Ball in the crater, taking a moment to push more debris and rock around it so there was no chance of it rolling away. He briefly thought about burying it but decided that it would take too much time and effort.

‘I need to get the other Dragon Balls,’ he thought to himself. ‘And pick off a few of Frieza’s soldiers so that his numbers begin to dwindle. If he is seeking out the Dragon Balls he won’t risk destroying the planet but if he thinks the danger is too great he will pull back and call for reinforcements. And that will give me time to get to my pod and escape with all seven Dragon Balls. Let Frieza eventually become frustrated and destroy this pathetic little planet; that will just cover my tracks!’

Vegeta smirked as he burst out of the water and looked about.

‘And then I will be able to return with my Saiyan army and crush him and all others that oppose me under my boot!’

~MC~MC~MC~

“You sensed it too then,” Rombo, one of the Namekian messengers that Elder Sax had sent out, asked Krillin as he landed near him. The Namekian had landed on a small plateau that was just above the village that he had been sent to warn, hiding amongst some of the long grasses. He wasn’t the tallest Namekian, or the strongest. His body was beginning to slowly condense down upon itself… he wasn’t as stocky as Elder Sax but he had developed a bit of a belly. But while he would never make someone scared with just a glower he had been one of the best in the village at hiding his power levels, which was why he had been selected to head out west, since that was the direction Frieza and his forces had originally landed. The hope was that he would be able to get there and help the villagers evacuate before Frieza arrived.

But… he’d been too late.

“We did,” Krillin said as he settled in next to Rombo. “Damn, I was hoping we’d make it in time.”

“What do we do?” Chiaotzu asked as he looked down at the village. The Namekians that lived there had all stopped what they were doing, turning as one to facethe west where several POWERFUL energy sources were rapidly approaching. “Can we get down there and warn them?”

“No,” Rombo muttered, shaking his head. “We wouldn’t get back up here in time and there is a risk that they might sense us. As much as I hate to say it they’re on their own.”

“We can’t let Frieza and his men get the Dragon Ball!” Yamcha declared only to drop his voice when the others shushed him.

“As loathed as I am to suggest it…” Isco said softly, “perhaps I can use this tragedy that is about to occur as a distraction.”

“What do you mean?” Krillin asked.

The robot stared down at the village. “I still have the Dragon Radar Bulma built into my being… I insisted this body have one as well. I know right where it is and I have no energy for Frieza to detect. One moment.” He grew quiet. “Raditz confirmed that it doesn’t work on machines, so they won’t know I am down there.”

“You go down and get the Ball,” Krillin whispered. “I hate using those poor villagers as a distraction but… its better that at the very least they don’t die for nothing.”

“And we can always bring them back,” Yamcha argued.

“Rombo?” Krillin asked. “Its your planet and you were supposed to go to this village. What do you think?”

The Namekian sighed. “Its… it’s the only option we have.”

Isco nodded, handing over a small comm unit that Krillin put into his ear before he began to scale face first down the plateau.

“I wish we could warn them somehow,” Krillin said.

Chiaotzu perked up. “Maybe if we speak JUST loud enough for the elder to hear? Namekians have really good hearing…”

But Rombo shook his head. “We can’t risk that this Frieza also has good hearing.”

“Right, no comments then. Stay quiet and suppress your power levels.” Krillin took a deep breath. “And I hate to say it but… we need to stay here and watch. What we see may very well help us figure out how to deal with Frieza and his men.”

Rombo placed a hand on Krillin’s shoulder. “I know it is hard for you. Your first reaction is to save those villagers. But please know that no one is expecting you to sacrifice your life needlessly.” He let out a sigh. “They… are going to suffer. We can only hope that Frieza will show some mercy.” But based on what he had been told by Elder Sax, and by the Evil Energy that he could sense racing towards them, that was very unlikely. “A fool tosses their life away on something they can not change purely because they can not accept it. We must not be fools. It is the only way we will survive. How we might win.”

The human swallowed and nodded at that but didn’t say no more… for suddenly the three new arrivals had appeared on the edge of the village.

The first had pale greenish skin and green hair on top of his head and stood tall and proud. The smirk on his face spoke of raw arrogance, unfiltered and untempered. It reminded Rombo of a few youthful Namekians who had been VERY close to falling and becoming part of the Demon Tribe; they had only been drawn back from the brink through intervention by those that loved them. But the figure before him… he had had no one to get him to see that there was more to life than himself and Rombo knew at once that he would forever walk a dark path. After all, it was impossible to light all the ways if you only had yourself to carry the lantern.

His counterpart was the complete opposite of the green and clearly vain warrior. Stocky where the other was trim, short where the other was tall, pink and covered in bumps and nubs where the other was smooth. The pink invader wore a smile too but it was far more of a sneer than a smirk, one that spoke of pain. Perhaps mostly pain for others… but Rombo knew that it would lead to pain for its weater as well. When one made their lives all about dishing out suffering upon others the only thing they could look forward to was eventually that pain coming back to them. Everyone got old. Got slow. Got weak. And when that happened there would be no one to stand up for him because he had knocked them all down. He wondered if the warrior understood that… perhaps he was arrogant enough to believe that wouldn’t happen to him.

Perhaps he simply didn’t care.

But for as intimidating as those two were it was the final member of their group, the one sitting in the strange round hoverpod who looked upon the villagers with a bland and bored stared… that truly worried Rombo.

‘That… can only be Frieza,’ he though as he looked at the alien that clearly thought that the difference between being alive and being dead wasn’t the whims of nature… but himself and HIS choices.

Elder Moori stepped forward, doing his best to remain calm in the face of one so evil that just to look upon them was to know the darkness within their heart. Rombo had heard that Moori was one of the greatest Elders, with some whispering that perhaps he would surpass Guru one day, but in that moment Rombo knew that he truly was beyond a mere Namekian for his faced down Frieza without showing the terror that must have been gripping his heart.

“You are not from our planet,” Elder Moori stated. “I am Elder Moori, leader of this village. Might I ask who you are?”

“You might,” the one Rombo pegged as Frieza said. This was confirmed a moment later when the alien stated, “I am Lord Frieza, Emperor of the Known Galaxy. These are my servants Zarbon-“ the green vain one reached up and brushed his long locks with the back of his hand for no other reason that he wanted to, “-and Dodoria.” The large pink warrior let out a huff that might have been a laugh. “As for why we are here the matter is quite simple: as I stated I am the Emperor of the Known Galaxy. And this little squalid mudball is PART of the Galaxy… and is known to me. As such all that lies here is mine. The water. The grass. The trees. And all of you.” He paused. “Now, luckily for you I have no interest in any of that. Your water looks sour, your grass is unkempt, your trees are stunted, and your people are cowering little wretches that would probably mess up dusting my room.

“However… luckily for you, slug, you showed me respect. That is… very lucky indeed. Zarbon, do you remember the Sugaras of Molas 2? The ones with the funny little heads that were all squished in on the top?”

“I do, Lord Frieza. They were quite rude to you.”

“Very very rude!” Frieza declared with a chuckle. “And… what exactly happened to them, Dodoria?”

Dodoria smirked before opening his mouth wide and, to Rombo’s horror, fired on three villagers who had just been standing there. The screams of the three only had an instant to be heard before they were silenced and when the beam of energy Dodoria had fired disappeared their burnt and twisted corpses laid on the ground.

“That. That is what happened.” Frieza though shot a side look at Dodoria. “Though, as I was saying, they have been POLITE to me. There was no need to be so… vicious… yet so soon, Dodoria.”

“Apologizes my Lord,” Dodoria said though Rombo knew he didn’t mean it and Frieza clearly wasn’t that upset at all.

“And apologize to our new acquaintance,” Frieza declared.

“My… apologizes… Elder Moori,” Dodoria rumbled, still wearing a vicious smirk, clearly daring Moori to speak up. “To be fair… considering you all look the same I don’t think its much of a loss to trim your numbers down by a few.”

Moori though pressed his lips together and said, “Apology… accepted. So long as it doesn’t happen again.”

That made Frieza laugh. “my my my. I must say you are a delight to talk to. Most of the leaders I tend to interact with are so hoity. ‘This is my world!’ ‘These are my people!’ ‘You can’t do this or that or this other thing!’” Frieza paused. “Of course the next words out of their mouth tend to be pleads for mercy followed by screams. But you? Oh… you are doing so much better than them.”

Moori took a deep breath. “You are… clearly here for something.”

“To the point.” He looked to Zarbon. “I like this one. If only all the peasants I dealt with understood their place things would be so much simpler.” He turned back to Moori. “I have been informed that you hold something known as a… Dragon Ball.”

Beside him Rombo felt Krillin tense. Though none of them had said it he knew there had been the hope that Frieza didn’t know about the Dragon Balls and was on the planet for some other reason. Now that hope was shattered.

“They are sacred relicts. They are to be treasured and protected.”

“And I assure you I will do just that.” Frieza waved with his hand and Zarbon stepped forward. “Now then… we have had a lovely conversation so far… it would be a tragedy if you were to ruin that. So be a good little pissant and give me what I want.”

“I-“

“Stop right there!”

Rombo snapped his head to the North and barely managed to stifle his gasp.

“What is he doing?” Yamcha hissed.

“Krillin,” Isco said, it only Rombo’s enhanced hearing that let him follow the robot’s comments. “What is going on? I have made it into the area where they keep the Dragon Ball but I am detecting new Energy Sources approaching.”

“Its Larin,” Krillin said as quietly as he could. “He’s arrived with the other Namekian Warriors.”

“…well… fuck us then,” Isco replied.

Frieza smirked as he looked over at Larin and the other Warriors. “And just what is this here?” He slowly glanced at Moori. “Certainly not reinforcements YOU called for… you didn’t have the time and I can tell by the squalor you live in that the technology to summon ones such as these pathetic little wretches doesn’t exist on this planet.”

“We’re here to stop you,” Larin declared. “Others might be too cowardly to stand up to you but we aren’t going to let you terrorize our people!” He fell into a fighting stance. “We are some of the greatest warriors on all of Namek and when we are done with you the only thing you’ll be feeling is pain and regret.”

“My my my,” Frieza said, a slow bemused smile forming on his lips. “You know I was wondering if I would encounter yet another delusional fool that thought themselves the hero. One can never be too sure, after all. But here you are, almost right on time, give or two a small delay. I suppose this is where I should ask about what you can do? What special abilities or powers you might have, that old cheerful tune? Give me own boasts about how you are doomed to fall against me while you counter it concerning comments about your warrior pride or the secret techniques of your ancestors? Perhaps you are something special amongst your people? That gets brought up a lot.

“But you see… you are nothing special at all. On a thousand different planets there are a thousand different warriors who all thought themselves the hero. That they, and they alone, could do what no others had ever managed to do and be able to bring me low.”

Frieza paused.

“Did I fail to mention that those thousand warriors on those thousand planets are now in a thousand graves?”

Larin though merely balled his hands into fist. “Talk all you want… I know you’re bluffing!”

That made Frieza chuckle. “Let me assure you, hero… I NEVER bluff.” He turned to his right. “Dodoria?”

“Yes’em?”

“Kill them.”

“’kay.” The squat warrior slowly began to walk towards the three Namekian warriors. “Now… I know what you must be thinkin’: ain’t no way that ol’ Dodoria has a chance against us. We outnumber him three ta one. No way can he stand against us! But see, that’s where you’re makin’ your mistake.”

And suddenly Dodoria had gone from lumbering towards them to appearing right behind the one warrior that was just left of Larin. He grabbing onto his antenna with one hand and then clamped the other hand onto his shoulder before giving a vicious yank. The warrior screaming as his antenna were ripped clear of his head, purple blood gushing from his forehead. He bent down, pressing his hands to his face, even as Dodoria reached out and wrapped a meaty hand around his wrist and tossed him over his shoulder.

It was so quick that Larin and the other warrior didn’t have time to react and when they finally did realize what was going on they twisted around only for Dodoria to have appeared behind the second unknown warrior, lashing out with his foot and kicking his head clean off his shoulders. The warrior’s body stood there for a brief moment before it realized that it was dead and collapsed to the ground. Dodoria once more moving away in the blink of an eye, now catching the head and with a smirk smashing it into a pulpy mess with his bare hands.

“I ain’t gonna be ‘standin’’ against ya.”

Chapter Text

“By Kami…” Yamcha whispered in horror as he stared at what Dodoria had done to the Namekian warrior. “He didn’t even have a chance to fight back!”

“This… this is a dark day for all of us,” Rombo said, clearly shaken by the sight of a fellow Namekian being slaughtered so easily by the invaders. “We have gone countless years since we have seen one of our numbers die…”

“I think,” Krillin said, swallowing the thick ball of terror that had built up in the back of his throat, “that this will only be the first death your planet sees.”

It was clear from what he was seeing that Larin and the other Namekian warrior simply had no hope against Dodoria. The alien warrior was toying with the two of them now, seeing just how much pain he could put them through. Krillin had seen fighters test their opponents, interested in just how far they could go before they ended up ending a fight. Sometimes it was because they wanted to teach the other fighter a lesson. Sometimes it was the powerful reminding the weak how powerful they actually were. But Dodoria was one of the very last kinds, the most dangerous kind: those that did it because they thrilled at the pain they caused.

“Now,” Frieza said, looking over at Moori, “because you have been directly to the point and kept me in a good mood, I will only ask you this once: are there any more young fools that will try and stand against me?”

“I… I do not know,” Moori admitted as Dodoria slammed his fist into the belly of the Namekian who had gotten his antenna ripped off. That caused the Namekian to let out a groan of pain but that only lasted a second, as Dodoria turned around and smashed his knee into his face, cracking his jaw. “I did not call for them-“

“Oh, that I can tell,” Frieza assured him. “As I stated… I actually find myself liking you. Nothing but polite, barely stuttering in the face of my power… it is so utterly annoying when I ask someone a simple question and they begin to tremble and shake and can b-b-b-b-b-b-b-barely get out their words.” He raised his hand to his mouth, stroking his upper lip with an index finger as he laughed at what Krillin could only assume Frieza thought was an amusing joke. “Do you remember that planetary leader… the one with the purple nose, Zarbon? Couldn’t stop weeping the moment he saw me?”

“I do, Lord Frieza,” Zarbon said with a casual air. “Every time you tried to speak he’d interrupt you to at once promise to do whatever you asked.”

“I enjoy it when one is subservient, of course, but it is nice to be able to actually ISSUE my commands.” There was a scream and Krillin turned to see that Dodoria had dislocated Larin’s shoulder and was now sitting on top of him, leisurely punching him in the face over and over. Smack, pause, smack, pause, smack, pause. “I can’t remember, Zarbon… was that the one I had you slowly skin alive or the one that I reduced to dust after he cut me off one too many times?”

“I believe that was actually the one you launched into space so they might freeze to death, sir.”

Frieza laughed at that, clapping his hands. “That’s right! Now I remember! Thank you Zarbon! How ever would I get by without you.” He paused. “Well, honestly I would get by rather well as there are plenty in the Frieza Force I could replace you with but there would be a breaking in period that would delay things terribly.” Zarbon merely bowed his head at that and Frieza turned his focus on Moori once more. “Continue to avoid emulating those failures and you and your village may very well get out of this alive.” The Namekian with Larin screamed in agony as Dodoria caught a surprise attack he’d tried to launch, grabbing the Namekian by the ankle and slamming him hard into the ground. With his broken jaw Krillin knew even letting out the bellow of pain had been agony for him. Moori tensed at that but did nothing.

“Why isn’t he doing something?” Yamcha hissed. “How can he just stand there while Larin is torn apart?”

Rombo was the one that spoke. “He is an Elder. His duty is to the village. Larin… Larin has interfered with his purpose to protect life on Namek. The moment he did so he became no longer a concern for Moori. He knows that as well… it is why he is making no move to beg for his help. None of them are happy about it but that is the situation we have found ourselves in.”

“We… we should be doing something,” Yamcha whispered. “We should be down there helping him!”

Krillin though shook his head, reaching out and grabbing Yamcha’s wrist. “We can’t. Frieza can tear us apart just sitting there… I can feel it, you can feel it. He is far beyond our level. We go down there and we are dead at best. At worst it will draw the others here and everyone dies. We have to think about this, Yamcha… we have to be careful. We can’t rush in… not this time.” Yamcha glowered at that but did nothing else. Made no move to interfere.

It wouldn’t have mattered anyway because from the looks of things it appeared that the battle, if one could even call it that, was just about over.

Dodoria chuckled as he smashed the two Namekians’ heads together, looking at their twitched forms as they laid puddled on the ground by his feet. “Now…what was all that about you standing against me?” He crouched down and pressed a thick meaty finger into the temple of Larin’s remaining partner. “Don’t seem like you are standing all that much. In fact it looks like you aren’t going to ever do any standing again.” He glanced at the warrior’s mangled, twisted legs, which had been shattered in multiple places. “Man, that is gonna be quite the burden on these villagers. They’re gonna have ta feed ya and bath ya and wipe ya after ya take a shit… I think the only proper thing to do is to lighten their load.” And with that he pressed down harder and the warrior let out one final cry before Dodoria drove his finger though his head and into his brain, killing him.

Krillin shut his eyes and grimaced and Rombo let out a mournful sigh.

“Ya never should have listened to that loudmouth who dragged ya inta this,” Dodoria said before kicking Larin. The blow sent the Namekian warrior flying through the air, disappearing over the horizon so that Krillin could no longer see him. Dodoria chuckled and got up, brushing his hands off as he did so. “All taken care of, Lord Frieza.”

“Save for the fact that we don’t know if the one you kicked is dead or not,” Zarbon retorted.

“Nah, I felt ribs snap on that kick. He’s dead.”

Zarbon though pressed the issue. “Can you be sure though? Lord Frieza did command you to kill them and there is a chance that he is still alive.”

“Ain’t no chance,” Dodoria said with utterly confidence. “I know when I’ve killed something and I’ve killed that one dead.”

“Just like you know that one was actually the leader who dared to insult our emperor?” Zarbon asked and that caused Dororia’s eyes to widen. He looked back at the two dead Namekians even as Zarbon let out an overly dramatic sigh. “You were given a rather simple order, Dodoria, and not only did you fail to complete it but your actions have allowed the cretin that dared to insult Lord Frieza to escape.”

“He’s dead!” Zarbon declared quickly, a twinge of panic coloring his words. “I know he’s dead! I’ll go retrieve his corpse right now!”

“no no,” Frieza said, waving him off. “If you say he’s dead that is good enough for me.” The alien ruler paused, a smile tugging on his lips. “After all… you know what will happen if that impotent fool shows his face again, Dodoria. Look at your sparring partners… you’ll be joining them if your foolishness caused you to leave your task incomplete.”

Krillin wished he could have enjoyed the fear that was clearly going through Dodoria’s body at that moment. Gleefully chuckled at how the monstrous alien warrior had been brought low, made to feel the terror he had brought not just to Larin and his fellow warriors but countless others long before he had ever even known what Namek was. But he couldn’t find it in himself to delight in the fear that Dodoria was fearing in the face of the death that he-

“Sir,” Isco stated, “I have claimed the Dragon Ball and I am already on route to deposit it where Frieza and his forces will not be able to find it. And now that I am well out of blast range it occurs to me that we have failed to take into account just how Frieza will react with Moori is unable to give him the Dragon Ball.”

“…ooooh nooooo,” Krillin murmured.

~MC~MC~MC~

Frieza had to admit… he was pleased.

‘When I decided to come down here on my own I thought it would be rather tiresome,’ he thought as he watched the squat Namekian leader go to retrieve the Dragon Ball. ‘Not merely having to deal with the apathetic little wretches that call this planet home trying to stand up to me… no, it is just so tiresome dealing with my father’s machinations.’

Frieza had known from the moment he had taken over his father’s empire (and he refused to claim it was half an empire… even if Cooler’s half hadn’t been utterly destroyed because of his foolishness Frieza had worked hard the last half a century to build up the Frieza Force into a truly terrible and wondrous machine of conquest) that his father wasn’t slipping away to retire. No… this was test, as was everything else that his father did. All a test to see if he ready to rule… or if he was plotting against his father… or if he was doing something else entirely. One could never know with his father, to the point that Frieza sometimes wondered if King Cold even knew himself why he had set things up. The man loved his plots and schemes to the point that he created them without a second thought towards an end goal.
King Cold loved to see how people would react to different situations. It was why he had, as Frieza had learned from some research into the Saiyans, been so interested in them.

(He wasn’t obsessed. He wasn’t. No matter what his annoyance of an older brother claimed he wasn’t obsessed.)

With each King Vegeta his father had treated them differently. Vegeta the First he had risen up after killing the previous King so that even their tiny monkey brains were able to realize that the only way they were going to be able to survive was to fall into line. Vegeta the Second had been left in constant fear, always worried he’d done something wrong thanks to small little comments that Frieza’s father had made; of course his father had done nothing to actually meet with Vegeta The Second, never traveling to the planet and only communicating through written word so that the ruler could never get a read on him. With the Third he had decided to, early in his life, send him secret messages concerning how he wished him to rule. The moron hadn’t realized that he was contributing to his father’s growing madness, even when Vegeta the Second had truly went off the deep end and challenged his son to a battle, ending up with an utter slaughter for his troubles. He had done all this just so when they first met Vegeta the Third would be so utterly flummoxed by King Cold being nothing like he expected, with none of the warmth he had thought would be directed his way, that he’d be left flat footed. And, of course, having Frieza take over would completely make the giant fool of a Saiyan, dumb even for a monkey, even more unsure of himself. And with Vegeta the Fourth… well, there was a reason Frieza kept the Prince so close to him and it had NOTHING to do with his “charming” personality.

(Well, to be honest Frieza hadn’t researched any of this at all. He had commanded others to look into it for him and report back with as short and to the point of a statement as they could. But he had gained the knowledge all the same and that was what truly mattered.)

His father’s sudden retirement was another scheme. Frieza had realized that right away. And he had realized that his father’s insistence that he not alter the ‘Inner Circle’ or his ‘Royal Council’ was a way for his father to keep an eye on him; after all, what good was an experiment if you couldn’t monitor it and see the end results? He had been informed that his father would be “most displeased” if Frieza dismissed Zarbon, Dodoria, the Ginyu Force, and several other important members of his Command.

‘Can it really be called MY command if I am not allowed to select who is a part of it?’ he thought, not for the first time.

All of the Old Guard were his father’s pets. They had been saved by him, recruited by him, or owed him in some other way. The only one he hadn’t been worried about was Berryblue, who while being recruited by King Cold was utterly loyal to Frieza, having shown a thousand times that she served him and only him. That he had no doubt and that was why she was allowed the right to talk back to him in ways that would get others killed. She had earned that right.

But the others? Frieza was always looking for a way to get rid of them even as they looked for a reason to go running back to his father and inform him of his actions. It was why he hadn’t brought the Ginyu Force with him to Namek; they were off on another mission, dealing with a bit of a problem the Heeters had been forced to alert him about, and contacting them would mean transmitting that he was heading to Namek. No one outside of those that had arrived on the planet knew what he was doing and he suspected that even now the spies were composing their messages to his father.

Every action had to be carefully watched, to ensure that he didn’t give Zarbon or Dodoria a reason to run to their father. It irked him to no end that they feared his father more than they did him but soon that would change.

And that is why he had decided to handle the situation on his own.

‘It is going rather splendidly,’ he thought to himself as Dodoria made a show of walking over to the corpses of the two Namekian warriors and dragging them to where all the villagers could easily see them. It wasn’t needed, of course, but Dodoria was desperate to impress him after his failure. ‘I have forgotten how good it feels to get out and remind the sniveling minions just how powerful I am while ensuring that my future subjects know it is wise not to coax out my anger.’

While he utterly disagreed with his father and brother claiming that he had grown ‘lazy’ he could admit that he had removed himself from the field over the last few decades. When he’d first taken over the Empire he had been out there often, slaughtering those that showed any signs of resistance and proving to his new soldiers his strength. But as all had settled into the new normal he’d been able to retreat to his flagship, monitoring situations and gaining information while in his private rooms.

‘And while I see no need to exert myself too greatly… there is something quite enjoyable about taking a moment to stretch my legs.’ He looked down at his Mobile Throne. ‘Well… in a manner of speaking.’ He mentally chuckled at his own joke… only to raise an eyebrow when the Namekian leader returned empty-handed. “Now now… unless the Dragon Ball is rather small…”

But the Leader shook his head. “It is gone.” And with that he dropped to his knees. “I know you will demand payment for this… take my life and spare my village.”

“Elder Moori, no!” one of the other Namekians cried out.

“Don’t do this!”

“I am the keeper of the Dragon Ball and it has disappeared on my watch. Unless you have taken it…” And for the first time he stared at Frieza with a touch of defiance. But Frieza merely continued to look at him, annoyed that the Dragon Ball wasn’t in his possession, and the Elder sighed, closing his eyes. “No. It must have been Larin. He must have sent one to take it away.” And with that he exposed his neck.

“…I must admit, as angered as I am by this… I am impressed. No whining. No pleading. Others would desire that… I would normally desire that. But at the moment I have no time for such distractions.” And with that he waved his hand. “Zarbon… kill half the villagers. Start with the oldest.”

“What?!?!” the Elder cried out but Zarbon had already thrust out his hands and fired on the Namekian villagers, dropping them at once to the ground as their hearts were pierced by the thin energy beams the green warrior fired from his fingers. “But-“

“You are willing to give up your life… that means that torture won’t work on you.” Frieza shook his head. “But you care for these meaningless things so their deaths will motivate your tongue to begin working.” He smiled at that, leaning forward. “You should be thanking me. Zarbon chose to kill the oldest first. That means the children were spared… for now.” His eyes narrowed at that. “So… where is the Dragon Ball?”

“I… I don’t know!” Moori pleaded.

“Zarbon?”

Several of the villagers, before realizing what was happening, fell to the ground dead, smoking holes burning in their chests.

“Too bad you got rid of the warrior leader,” Zarbon taunted to Dodoria. “If he were here you could have questioned him.”

“He is dead anyway!” Dodoria snapped. “And what if one of these Namekians know where the Dragon Ball left and you killed them?”

“Are you saying I should disobey our master?”

“I am saying-“

“You both better hope that we learn where the Dragon Ball is,” Frieza snapped, his good mood rapidly fading as the Elder continued to stare in horror at the massacre. ‘Hmmm… perhaps he is telling the truth. A pity but… well… he should have considered that the rebel would attempt something like this and gone to get me my Dragon Ball before his minion made off with it. Ah well, will only take a few adjustments with the scouters to-‘

“SOLAR FLARE!”

Frieza cried out as his vision suddenly went white and he shielded his face with his hands, Zarbon and Dodoria joining him in crying out.

The Emperor of the Known Universe had looked directly into the hearts of bright stars. Had seen planets burn… and caused it himself, cackling as the fires consumed the entire orb. Witnessed the darkness of space explode with light when a weapon of mass destruction was fired upon him and his armada in hopes of preventing them from claiming what was his by right.

But the blast of light that struck his eyes was the brightest, most painful burst he had ever encountered. It made not just his eyes burn but his brain as well. He couldn’t think. Couldn’t process what was happening. All he knew was the light and the pain of it and he did all he could to try and stop it from hurting him more.

And as the pain faded the fact that it HAD hurt him… well, that enraged him. He was LORD FRIEZA! Emperor of the Known Universe! HE! DID! NOT! FEEL! PAIN!

“Zarbon! Dodoria!” he roared as he found himself able to speak once more without descending into screams.

“Can’t… can’t see a thing!” Dodoria bellowed somewhere to his right.

“Open your eyes and find whoever did this!” Frieza demanded. His hand lashed out and suddenly the world spun, his mind racing for a moment as he tried to figure out what had happened only to dimly realize he must have hit one of the controls on his Mobile Throne and caused it to launch forward. It was supposed to respond to the most minor of touches by his feet but there were emergency controls near his hands. His flailing must have hit something…

Zarbon let out a screech and Frieza felt his Mobile Throne strike something… he darkly realized that it was VERY likely he had just run over his advisor. He kept moving though, spinning wildly which left his stomach lurching in his chest before he finally struck something so hard that he was nearly thrown from the Mobile Throne. Frieza cried out in pain as he felt his neck crack hard, the sensation nearly as agonizing as the light that had pierced his eyes.

Almost.

Finally, FINALLY!, he managed to open his eyes and find that he was half in one of the Namekian hovels. With a snarl of rage he flared out his energy, destroying the building before he spun around and fired on the other buildings, destroying them as well. His eyes were red, spots were dancing across his vision, and the release of his energy had destroyed his Mobile Throne completely.

Frieza took a slow breath, looking about at what remained of the village. Dodoria was rubbing his eyes violently with his meaty forearm while Zarbon groaned on the ground, looking rather bruised thanks to him being stupid enough to get in the way of Frieza.

But… most importantly… the villagers were GONE.

Frieza reached up to touch his scouter to try and track the foolish Namekians only to find that his scouter had been destroyed. Glancing at Zarbon and Dodoria showed they had lost theirs as well.

“Well…” Frieza said coldly, gritting his teeth, “I hope wherever those cretins went has plenty of space for their GRAVES! DODORIA!”

“Y-yes Lord Frieza?’ the muscular warrior asked.

“FIND THEM!!!!!!”

~MC~MC~MC~

“T-thank you,” Moori said as he moved next to Krillin as they blasted through the sky, staying as high as they could so as to avoid any watchful eyes. Thankfully all the Namekians were able to fly and knew the planet VERY well and thus were able to guide Krillin and Yamcha easily by just the bare minimum of landmarks. Rombo, having been told the meet up place for Elder Sax’s village and any other Namekians that were found, was in the lead, with Krillin and Yamcha hanging towards the back just in case Frieza and his men came at them. They must have made quite a sight, what with all manner of Namekians making up their ‘flock’.

“Don’t thank me,” Krillin said grimly. “Because of us half of your village is gone.”

“But the other half lives AND the Dragon Ball is out of the hands of the invaders,” Moori told him. “That is what matters. Yes, you could have come and confronted Frieza sooner… but you would have ended up no different than Larin. We would have still most likely been slaughtered by him… or been reduced to being his slaves. And Frieza would now hold a Dragon Ball. You have given us a chance. Not just our village but all of Namek. For that we will be forever grateful.”

Krillin sighed at that. “I wish I could feel as hopeful as you do.”

“Are you sure that they can’t follow us?” a young Namekian boy asked.

“We know they can’t,” Yamcha said. “Our friend Raditz used to work for Frieza-“ That caused the young Namekian’s eyes to go wide. “I… I mean he used to but he wasn’t that bad! Well, he was pretty bad. I mean he did some bad things like kill me…” The boy stared at Yamcha in open horror and he backtracked. “But hey, I’m all better! That’s what matters, you know? All is good! Its fine!”

The young Namekian just stared at him.

“Listen… uh…”

“Dende.”

“Dende. Don’t worry about Raditz. Yeah, he’s gruff but he’s with us and he hates Frieza more than anyone. So there is nothing to worry about from him. And as for those three they’ll never be able to find us… those little devices they were wearing are called Scouters. They let them detect energy. So with them destroyed they have NO hope of finding us!”

“You know,” Isco said in Krillin’s ear, “Avo would complain that Yamcha just jinxed us, if he were here.”

“…crap,” Krillin muttered.

~MC~MC~MC~

“Here!” Chiaotzu exclaimed as he arrived back at the canyon where they’d hidden the ship; with Frieza’s arrival the plans to send it up into space had been scuttled for now. The Namekians from Sax’s village were all gathered together, huddled into tight little groups talking amongst themselves. Bulma looked up from the Dragon Ball she was studying just as Chiaotzu flung over her head a scouter.

“You managed to get it?”

“I told you he did,” Tien complained. “Took out the Frieza Force soldier too.”

Chiaotzu nodded, though he didn’t look too pleased with himself. “I had to sneak up on him… it wasn’t a fair fight.”

“We aren’t concerned about fair fights anymore,” Raditz called out to him from where he was watching one of the entrances to the canyon. Above him Senza was working with several other Namekians to lift heavy rocks they had blasted off of a nearby outcrop so they might cover the top of the canyon. They were hoping that perhaps they could use the canyon itself as the entrance to whatever cavern or underground cave the Z Fighters and the Namekians carved into Namek, if Lord Guru didn’t know of any secret hiding spots for them. Senza has used his, as Kayos had once called it, “Clothes Beam” (a name he disagreed with but had stuck with the other Z Fighters) to create thick tarps that resembled the rock of the canyon, allowing them to hide a bit but the rocks would help fully disguise the canyon. That left only the two entrances, on either end, for Raditz and Tien to stand guard at either end.

‘That’s easy… getting Kakarot’s friends to put away their morals and realize that sometimes if you want to survive you have to do dirty little deeds is going to be the hard part,’ the elder Saiyan thought. ‘They are getting better… the robot is helping out too in smacking down their more stupid ideas…’ He sighed. ‘Damn you, Kayos… I need you around to talk sense into these morons.’

Raditz had been startled to discover that he missed his brother. He’d only been around Kakarot for a few weeks but in that time he’d found himself truly coming to rely upon his brother. And not just because of his oath, either. Kakarot and him worked well together, despite the fact that his little brother didn’t think like a Saiyan at all. Perhaps that was why they DID work well together… because they didn’t think like each other that meant that they were able to counter the blind spots the other had. And the personality clashes that had made the rest of the Frieza Force run VERY far away whenever he and Nappa and Vegeta were in the same room together didn’t occur with Kakarot. They were different… and that meant they didn’t get on each other’s nerves the same way that Nappa and Vegeta had for him.

But… even more shocking?

Raditz was missing Avo Kayos.

‘The human is one of the most underhanded fighters I’ve ever met. No sense of honor for his enemies. Utterly vicious even if others don’t see it.’ After hearing the Z Fighters reference ‘poison’ several times when it came to Kayos he had finally asked them about it… and startled them all when he’d laughed and declared that he’d never considered poison before but it would have been the perfect way to deal with Vegeta and Nappa. ‘The man will protect his friends fiercely… but anyone else is a tool at best and a foe to be destroyed at worst. And he doesn’t care about morals or values when it comes to that, either. He just wants the job done.’

Kayos understood that battle wasn’t clean. It wasn’t created with rules about how far one should go. He got that people saw rules as stupid limitations and the only time you should be pleased about them was when someone said they’d personally had rules.

‘If he were here… he would have all of these fools whipped into shape,’ he thought. Kayos, had he been born a Saiyan and on Planet Vegeta during the height of its power, would have been declared a Trainer, tasked with teaching young Saiyans the art of combat. They would have hated him… but all would have desired him to teach them. Raditz sighed before looking skyward. ‘Kakarot… you and Kayos better hurry up with whatever world you are trying to save and get back here. I’m not sure how much longer I can deal with your friends.’

“It was dishonorable…” Chiaotzu muttered even as Tien put a hand on his shoulder.

“Raditz is right; we can’t think like this a tournament. We’re basically in a war and we are going to have to be sneaky if we want to survive this.” Radtiz blinked at that, wondering if it was finally sinking into some of the Z Fighters’ heads that they were in grave danger and NEEDED to be smart about how they handled things.

“I know,” Chiaotzu said softly, looking down and scuffing his toe against the ground. “Isco, will you be able to take down the scouters?”

“I will… and perhaps more. I’ll have to be careful, as I don’t know how much protection their systems have-“

“None,” Raditz commented. “They have none. Frieza is arrogant like that. He thinks no one would dare attack his own computer systems. Its how I was able to easily stripe my scouter of tech.”

That made Gohan look up from the game he was teaching several of the Namekian youths. “So we could stripe that one as well after Isco is done?”

Raditz considered that. “Might not be a bad idea.” He looked at Bulma. “You aren’t great at sensing energy…”

“My mech can do it for me,” she said, gesturing at the power armor she had stripped off in order to look over the Dragon Ball Sax had given her. “I can look over the scouter though, see if it would work better than what I have set up. And we could always use the spare parts.”

Gohan nodded quickly. “And it can detect other things, right Uncle Raditz?”

“Yeah, course it can,” Raditz replied, not quite sure why his nephew was getting excited.

“Then if Bulma can’t use it… can I?”

“I don’t see why not,” Bulma said with a shrug before Raditz could say a word. “Chichi?”

“I suppose its safe,” the woman commented.

Raditiz narrowed his eyes at that. Just WHAT was Gohan up to? Because he knew the little boy was far sneakier than his parents realized… that was the nature of Saiyan Children, after all. At that age they knew they had power but also knew that any adult could rip their head off it they got too annoying. You only survived if you latched yourself onto someone stronger who could guide and protect you… or if you were able to be cunning enough to be able to get what you wanted without getting the smack you most likely deserved.

“I must say this is just embarrassing,” Isco commented. “When you said you had stripped your scouter, Raditz, I assumed you meant you actually stripped it of everything useful.”

“You thought I just had a scouter on for the look?” Raditz asked, staring at the drone.

Isco scoffed. “You squish bubbles do all sorts of moronic things. I, for example, don’t need to protect my glorious metal form, but you wear clothing. Sometimes just to show off your mammary glands!”

“We noticed that too,” Elder Sax stated, causing Chiaotzu to giggle and Tien to smirk while Bulma and Chichi glowered at him.

“But this is just… I am embarrassed to say that this is a fellow machine. Much like how I assume most parents are ashamed of their children.”

“Isco!” Chichi scolded.

“No no, I completely get it,” Raditz said with a nod, Tien and Chiaotzu mimicking him.

“Frieza deserves to be hacked just for having such primitive hardware and pathetic software.” Isco’s shell opened slightly and a cable slithered out. “In fact…”

“Isco,” Bulma said nervously, “I think we should JUST take the scouters offline.”

“I can cripple his ships. I am not going to give up that chance. It’s the only way he will learn. Also I must remind him that I am coming to replace him.”

Bulma opened her mouth but Raditz smirked and cut her off. “Let the drone have his fun.”

“…fine.”

~MC~MC~MC~

“Where are those green bastards!?!!” Dodoria snarled as he rocketed through the air. ‘I need to find them… if I don’t return to Lord Frieza with their heads then its gonna be my neck on the chopping block!’ He had already been in the bad graces of his employer thanks to the bastard Zarbon and now he was running further risk of enraging Frieza if he didn’t complete his assignment. ‘And after this I’m gonna make sure that Zarbon is the one fleeing for his life!’ he thought darkly.

He still wasn’t 100% sure why they were on the stupid planet as it was. All Frieza had said was there were 7 relics, the ‘Dragon Balls’, that he wished to claim that would grant him great power. But Frieza already had far more power than he knew what to do with so Dodoria had no idea WHY he would need even more. It all seemed like a waste of time to him; they could be out taking over planets but instead they were stuck on the stupid wet planet doing things far beneath ALL of them. Not just Frieza… but him and Zarbon as well! In fact most of the soldiers hadn’t been out on a proper planet-cleansing in years. Zarbon trained the troops and Dodoria handled rogues that had decided they didn’t need to follow orders.

‘I heard he was even thinking of bringing the Ginyu Force here, before he left them to deal with the mess the Heeters created!’ Dodoria thought in annoyance. ‘Just what is-‘

A blast of energy struck him in the side, causing him to lose some altitude. At once Dodoria corrected and looked around, trying to figure out just who had struck him.

“Listen here, ya green bastards!” he snarled. “I don’t know how you were able to blind us but you are going to pay for it! We might have let you live, even after those warriors showed up, but you deciding to do the dumb thing and try and fight back? All that’s done is piss all of us off and now we’re gonna enjoy tearing you apart! I’m gonna personally rip off your arms and legs and pin you to the front of our ship before we leave this planet!”

“Well well well,” a familiar voice said, causing Dodoria to slowly turn, “someone has gotten creative. I must admit I am impressed.”

“Vegeta.”

The Saiyan warrior smirked. “But… that creativity won’t save you here.”

“You think I’m afraid of you? I know how powerful you-“

Vegeta suddenly was right in front of Dodoria, the thick warrior barely having a chance to register what had happened before Vegeta struck him in the side of the head with a kick. The blow had Dodoria reeling and he crashed hard into the ground, groaning in pain.

“That’s the thing, Dodoria,” Vegeta taunted. “See… I’m not the average Saiyan Warrior anymore.”

Chapter Text

Deep in the bowels of Frieza Ship 743, one of the deep space communication vessels that was in charge of communications between Lord Frieza’s Personal Armada and the greater fleet, a worker named Wamelo frowned as he looked at his control panel. “Uh… are we scheduled for maintenance or something?” he asked the Frieza Force member that was sitting beside him.

“Not that I know of… better not be, I still have to put in the requests for that moon removal for the Soys.”

“Thought that was due last week,” Wamelo said, turning away from his station.

Pinapel shrugged. “It was but then there was a question if we actually had to handle the debris caused by destroying the moon. Got delayed a week while Lord Frieza went over the contract with the lawyers.”

“Huh.” Wamelo paused. “Do we?”

“Funny enough we don’t so long as we break it up into small enough bits. But not so small that it becomes classified as dust. I have no idea how big ‘dust’ is by the way; that is up to the number squirrels to figure out.”

“Heheh. Yeah.” Wamelo turned to his keyboard and typed in a few words only to sigh. “There must be maintenance. This thing is going way too slow.”

Looking over his shoulder Pinapel frowned as he watched the letters that Wamelo had just typed in slowly appear on the screen. “Geez, that is going long.” He shook his head, the purple stalks that ran along his head trembling slightly. “Try doing a restart. That might fix it.”

“Don’t bother,” Hundew said in his odious and condescending tone; Wamelo and Pinapel hated his guts because he always thought he was the best of the best and that anyone not up to his high standards was a lazy slacker. The Frieza Force member was always puffing himself up, claiming titles that weren’t actually his and sucking up to the bosses. He seemed to forget that they were all low level ship workers, entering in data and hoping they didn’t get in the way of the Frieza Soldiers. “Its happening to my system too and I have already run several programs to try and clear out any data that would be slowing it down. Something is going on, most likely maintenance, and if you shut down you might cause problems.”

“As opposed to not being able to get my work done because it takes 10 minutes for a single line to be typed?”

“Well, Wamelo,” Hundew said in a snide little voice, “maybe if you were like some of us and actually got your work done ahead of schedule it wouldn’t be that big of a deal for you to be delayed.”

Pinapel smirked, though he did well to hide it behind his hand. “You know… you won’t be ahead in your work if this keeps up.”

That had Hundew lean back in his chair before he reached over and pressed the Call Button on his terminal.

“Do you have to?” Wamelo complained.

“Some of us don’t fear the bosses,” Hundew said condescendingly. “Maybe if you had a better relationship with them you wouldn’t need to worry about them.”

Wamelo bit back a retort. Hundew still believed that everyone in the Frieza Force was as rule-abiding as he was, not getting that in order to get through the ranks one had to be powerful, cunning, and underhanded. People were willing to vaporize you in order to take your job or prevent you from stealing theirs. It was why Wamelo and Pinapel were willing to stay low-level grunts; the pay was decent enough, the work was something they could easily handle, and they stayed on the ship while others went and risked their lives. Hundew figured that if he sought out the bosses they would either be able to help him or they would compliment him on his hard work; Wamelo knew that his reward was one day getting told he’d done a good job just before he was shot out of the airlock for annoying someone one too many times.

“What is it?” the gruff, annoyed voice of Sorbet demanded as he waddled over. The short little manager was always gruff and annoyed but he seemed even more so that moment. Most likely because it was Hundew who was demanding his attention. “I am supposed to be monitoring your entire department and not just you, Hundew.”

If the orange-skinned alien noticed that Sorbet was looking at him much as how a finely dressed actor might look at some poop they had just stepped in Hundew didn’t show it.

“Sir, I would like to know why we weren’t warned about there being scheduled maintenance. We could have rearranged our sleep patterns so that our free time fell during it, rather than now when we are supposed to be working. As it is we will need to work unpaid overtime just to get caught back up.”

Wamelo wanted to smack the bastard for putting ideas in Sorbet’s head but from the way Sorbet was staring at him it was clear that smacking Hundew was something their boss wanted to do himself.

“What are you talking about?” he demanded in frustration. “There is no scheduled maintenance! We are in the middle of an important mission for Lord Frieza! You think we would jeopardize that by scheduling maintenance?”

Hundew though wasn’t affected by Sorbet’s angry tone; it was probably why he had survived as long as he had, annoying he might be. Bosses liked having workers who could take their bellows and screams and not react. “Sir, you can clearly see that something is going on here.” He gestured at his screen and Wamelo glanced over, seeing that the words his neighbor had been typing were still slowly appearing, one letter at a time.

Sorbet frowned and leaned in close. “What have you done to your computer? Why is it acting like this?”

“That is why I asked about the maintenance,” Hundew stated, his tone respectful but also making it clear that he was finding Sorbet’s questions confusing. Wamelo, for his part, wasn’t too concerned at all and much to his own surprise found himself speaking.

“Probably was but it got lost in the shuffle. You know how it is… one person sends a message off to let everyone know about an update to the computers, but that person got killed because they said Zarbon’s thighs were looking a bit chunky, and none of us get the message.”

“Watch your tongue!” Sorbet declared, forceful and stern but also filled with terror. “We must show respect to our commanders! None of these filthy lies about Zarbon letting himself go and eating too many cream puffs!” Wamelo decided not to mention that the word ‘cream puff’ had never crossed his lips; he’d tap danced as close to the line as he wished to.

“Its happening to mine now too,” Pinapel stated. “While we were talking. Everything is moving like a Tremill Slug after gorging itself on peppers.”

Sorbet frowned as he shoved Hundew away from his keyboard and began to type away. Wamelo saw several other works were pausing from their work to watch what the department head was up to… and he also saw that their screens were still filling with text as they did their data entry, despite the fact that their fingers weren’t touching the keys at all.

That… was concerning.

“Its spreading,” Hundew stated and for once Wamelo didn’t get annoyed by the worker’s voice. He took out a handheld and began to type into it. “This seems to be working-“

“Wait a minute,” Pinapel said as he took out his own handheld. “Blakberry, come here.” The short worker with curly pink hair hurried over. “Take out your handheld, okay? But don’t turn it on just yet. Hundew? You signed into the network?”

“Of course I am,” Hundew stated. “We are always supposed to be…” he trailed off, staring at the device he was clutching. “Its slowing down.”

“Blakberry. Don’t sign in. Cast to Hundew’s.” The worker nodded and after a moment confirmed he was now piggybacking off of Hundew’s system… only for his own handheld to slow down. “Disconnect from the network!” Pinapel declared. “No wireless and no hardlines! They don’t matter!”

“What is going on?” Sorbet demanded and Wamelo wasn’t surprised that while all the rest of them had figured it out their boss was still in the dark. Honestly that was the norm for them all.

“Something is hacking our systems,” Wamelo stated. “Its gotten in and its draining all our resources in order to do… whatever it is that its doing.”

Sorbet’s eyes went wide with panic. “Can we kill the connection? Reboot the system?”

Good suggestions but far too late. “He’s controlling everything. See, my computer’s no longer typing…” he reached over and typed in the word ‘boobies’ because even in an emergency he was an immature brat, but nothing happened. No words appeared on the screen. “I’m completely locked out. It only finished up the last bit I was typing before everything was taken over but that’s it.”

“You… you mean to tell me that our network has been compromised?” Sorbet demanded. “How?”

“Someone looking at some nudie pics?” Pinapel suggested.

“Grow up,” Hundew declared.

But Sorbet took that comment and ran with it. “Well? Was that what happened? Did one of you little perverts decide to use your work terminal to look up some smut?”

“Wamelo was the first one to notice anything,” Hundew stated.

“You told us it was happening to your computer,” Pinapel pointed out.

“Yes but he was the first to report it… so clearly he’s the porn-looker.”

“That is exactly something someone looking at porn would say,” Wamelo commented, causing Hundew to bluster.

“I… I have no need to look such garbage! I am too busy serving Lord Frieza!”

For his own safety Wamelo resisted the urge the comment on that little admission. “Sir, we need to get everyone off the network before this spreads.”

“What we need to do, soldier, is figure out how this happened and destroy the one that dared to do it! This is an embarrassment for the entire Frieza Force and I’m not going to let it stand for a moment more!” Sorbet puffed out and his little speech might have meant something… had he actually been addressing soldiers.

But no… he was addressing the clerks and the officer workers who kept the Frieza Force going. The true lifeblood of Lord Frieza’s business. Because for as much as the soldiers liked to believe that they were the most important ones, since they were the ones that were out there wiping out life on planets, that wasn’t true. What they failed to realize is that without the workers who, behind the scenes, set everything else up… they wouldn’t have a reason to exist. It was the salesmen who were going to planets desperate for more land or new resources that made the planets valuable. The workers like Wamelo who cataloged everything to make sure that records were air-tight. Those that checked on the supply lines. The Frieza Force wasn’t just the morons with blasters and body armor, after all.

But some, like Sorbet, always had it in their heads that they belonged with the fighters rather than doing the important work.

“We need to contact Lord Frieza at once!” Sorbet declared. “He needs to know about this!”

One of the other workers chimed in. “Sir, Lord Frieza left strict orders-“

But Sorbet cut him off. “The fleet is being hacked! He’ll want to know of this!”

“Except, sir, we run the risk of infecting his ship,” Pinapel pointed out. “Do you want to upset him by having his ship taken over too?”

At once Sorbet’s eyes went wide, his body rigid with terror at that little bit of info that was sinking into his gray matter. “No calls in or out! We need to figure out a way to contact help without using our network! All hands on deck for this!”

The workers all set about, trying to figure out just what was going on. Only Wamelo noticed that at the bottom of his screen a single word appeared, but he thought little of it.

After all… what the hell was an ISCO anyway?

~MC~MC~MC~

Dodoria grunted as he took a hit in the side.

“Now… it seems to me that three possible things have happened,” Vegeta stated as he swung several more punches at Dodoria’s head, the heavyset fighter just barely managing to bring his open palms up to block them. They were hovering about a 100 feet above the surface of the planet, trading blows with one another. Or, to be more accurate, Vegeta was flinging punches and kicks at Dodoria’s body and the elite warrior was doing all he could to avoid being hit. “First, you have gotten weaker, Dodoria. Arms a bit sluggish… legs weighed down. Eating a bit too much of that fine cooking you get on the Frieza Hub Worlds?”

“Jealous?” Dodoria said, trying to turn the insult back on Vegeta. While he would never have been turned down visiting one of the Hub Worlds, the planets that Frieza kept for himself to serve as the capital bases for the Empire, the Saiyan Prince had always been kept far too busy to make a visit. It was a message from Frieza that Vegeta best remember his place and that was NOT part of his Inner Circle. Thus he didn’t get to experience the wonders of the Hub Worlds, only hear of them. The casinos that never closed, where people played card games and slots that all featured Frieza’s face. The shows put on by the most skilled performers in the galaxy; some performed due to an agreement to spare their planet, others because they simply wanted to. The cultural artifacts from civilizations long dead, preserved by King Cold himself (Frieza had never really gotten into such things and Dodoria didn’t blame him as it was all odd and strange to him anyway).

And, of course ,the food.

Every kind of meal that one could desire could be found there. The great chefs in the universe all clamored to work for Frieza, knowing that doing so would allow them to showcase their skills. Agreements were ironclad, allowing them to have other restaurants (and always be warned ahead of time if the Frieza Force was targeting a plant one was located on) but their main place had to be on a Hub World. There the finest dining was available and they all competed to become Frieza’s new favorite. Dodoria himself had table always ready for him at three of the different restaurants on the Hub Worlds and he enjoyed watching the glowering, envious looks of those that were forced to wait in line as he was sat at a table and given a menu.

“Considering what the food has done to your already ample waistline?” Vegeta asked, giving several quick punches to Dodoria’s gut. Thankfully he had trained up his body to absorb such blows but it was still annoying that Vegeta was able to get the hits in. “Second option is that I’ve just gotten so much better.”

Dodoria hated to admit it but… yeah, Vegeta was better than he had been the last time the two had brawled. Frieza had decided he wanted to be entertained and demanded the two to spar, so he could see ‘what a monkey can do against an urchin’. The two had battled for about 10 minutes and Dodoria had enjoyed the fight, declaring that Vegeta should stick around the Flagship more often, because he made the best punching bag he’d ever had. The bobbing, the weaving, the attempts to avoid hits? No punching bag did that. Made him an utter delight.

But now it was Dodoria who found himself the punching bag. While he was able to get some hits in as well, and he could tell that Vegeta was actually trying against him and not toying around with their fight as Dodoria had done years ago… it still remained a painful blow that he was having so many problems against the Saiyan.

He was one of the strongest warrior in Lord Frieza’s army. All but Frieza himself and Zarbon feared him and the latter didn’t tremble only because he was arrogant enough to believe that he could beat Dodoria. But now Vegeta was-

A direct punch to his chin brought Dodoria out of his thoughts, mostly because the blow nearly caused him to bite off the tip of his tongue and crack his teeth. He barely managed to bring his arms up to defend against the second punch that had been aimed at his temple.

‘Damn it… he has gotten better! I try to take him on and it feels like I’m strugglin’ ta get through syrup! How the hell did he get so fast and so strong so quickly! We had him so busy he never had a chance ta get bored and properly train!’ Frieza had been firm that he didn’t want Vegeta to ever get delusions of grandeur… or, rather, more than he already had. As such he had commanded Zarbon and Dodoria to make sure Vegeta was far too busy to do anything other than Frieza’s orders, comparing it to constantly forcing a dog to do tricks until that was all they knew. ‘That would prevent him from healin’ up properly too… smug little bastard would only be able to rest enough ta be able ta fight the next fight. Yet here he is, managin’ ta go toe ta toe with me. How is this possible?!?’

Vegeta smirked as the two of them locked up, fingers interlaced as they struggled to shove each other back. Fingers gripping hard Dodoria shoved with all his might… only for Vegeta to not even budge in the slightest.

“Of course… there is the third option,” Vegeta said, purposely shifting his body so Dodoria suddenly found himself leaning close to him, the Saiyan able to whisper in his ear. “That I am stronger… and you have gotten weaker.”

Dodoria roared at that and moved to crack Vegeta’s wrists like they were sugar cane sticks. It was a move he had done many times, which always served to startle his foes and leave them screaming in pain. A show of raw power that few were ready for-

Vegata suddenly spun his body and drove his foot into Dodoria’s ankle, causing the pink warrior to howl as he felt something crack.

“oh oh oh,” Vegeta taunted as Dodoria let go of him and flew back by about 20 feet, giving them some distance. He looked over his left ankle and saw that it was already beginning to swell up. The bastard had managed to break it! “Frieza isn’t going to be happy when he sees that!”

“He won’t notice when I bring him your head!” Dodoria roared before taking a deep breath, charging up the energy in his gut before unleashing it from his mouth. The beam rocketed at Vegeta, so fast that he had no hope of fleeing-

Vegeta slashed out with his hand and batted the blast away like he was swatting a pesky fly.

“Now now, Dodoria… everyone knows in a fight you should only focus on what is happening and not what might. That causes you to get distracted.” Vegeta folded his arms over his chest, a condescending smirk forming on his lips as he stared the pink warrior down. Dodoria HATED seeing him look at him like that; no one looked at him anymore like that. He hadn’t been looked at like that since he was a child, mocked for being the weakest of his tribe and that he should be left out in the woods to die.

‘And when they did leave me out there… I grew strong. Powerful. And I returned and killed all the elders and everyone that ever doubted me and took over! I showed them how wrong they were and made them regret ever doubting me!’ He looked at his broken ankle again and it filled him with a dark and powerful rage. ‘And I am going to show Vegeta just how bad he messed up challenging me!’

Letting out a roar Dodoria flared out his aura before rushing at the Saiyan Prince, ready to put him in the ground.

~MC~MC~MC~

“I got it!” Gohan said happily, hurrying over to Dende. He held up the scouter that Bulma had given him, turning it over in his hand. “Look, it even can adjust its size so you can wear it if you want!”

“I’m okay with you wearing it, Gohan,” the young Namekian said with a smile.

“Thanks!” Gohan said as he slipped the scouter on, allowing it to adjust to his head. Bulma had actually been rather impressed with that, marveling at how everything, even the glass that made up the screen of the scouter, was able to shrink down to fit whoever wore it. She had almost refused to part with the scouter, wanting to study it and figure out how she could apply such tech to her own devices. Raditz though had spoken up, telling her that she could look at his when they were back on Earth and even if not he was sure they would be able to snag more scouters before everything was said and done.

“I’m still not sure why we are doing this,” Dende said as Gohan led him through the crowd of adult Namekians that were mingling about the canyon that had become their hiding space. None of the elders paid any attention to the two; Dende had told Gohan that Namekian adults let children have a lot of freedom, since their planet was very peaceful and what dangers children might get into could be handled because they were trained very young how to fly and how to do some minor Ki manipulation. So they didn’t think anything of the two sneaking away from the group, not even noticing as they did so. As for Gohan’s family they were busy working on carving out the underground cavern that would allow everyone gathered to safely hide from Frieza and his men.

“We can’t just sit here and let Frieza hurt your people,” Gohan answered. “My daddy, if he were here, wouldn’t be standing around waiting to see what was going to happen! He would be working to stop this! And that’s what we’re gonna do!”

“We’re not gonna fight Frieza though, right?” Dende asked nervously.

Gohan shook his head. “No, I don’t think so,” he told his new friend. “Or any of his men. But we are gonna find Lord Guru.”

Dende nodded at that; going to the Eldest Namek wasn’t that bad of a plan. Certainly not the most dangerous thing they could do. He had never met Lord Guru but he had met Nail, the Namekian that Guru had selected to take over for him. Or, at least, that’s what everyone said about Nail. He had been a bit scary because he was so tall and powerful… but also very kind. He’d taken time to talk with everyone, even Dende, asking him about what training he was getting and showing him how to perform a healing technique. Dende hadn’t quite been able to master that but he really wanted too.

‘And if Lord Guru is anything like Nail then he’ll be able to help us for sure!’ Dende thought happily. ‘Lord Guru is the wisest and most powerful Namekian to ever live. It is said that after the Great Drought he carved out homes for all the new Namekians with his bare hands!’ He had been told that in the Prime of his life Lord Guru had been over 100 feet tall and that was him at his smallest! If he went into his giant form he could hold the planet in the palm of his hand!

“We have to make sure that someone told him about Frieza and his forces invading,” Gohan said as they got through the crowd of people. But rather than make for the end of the canyon he carefully flew up, towards the cracks and gaps in the great stone slabs that had been used to cover the top of the canyon. While they did well to hide them from any of Frieza’s men that were flying about there were still gaps to allow some light in and these were just big enough for Gohan and Dende to wiggle through.

With a pop the two of them emerged outside and Gohan grinned, his tail wagging as he looked about the planet.

“We can use this scouter to find the highest power level… that should be Lord Guru!”

“Uh… wouldn’t the highest power level be Frieza?”

Gohan’s eyes went wide at that and he swallowed nervously. “Oh. Oh yeah.”

“Its okay,” Dende assured his new friend, patting him on the shoulder. He hadn’t meant to scare him. “I know where Lord Guru is. And we can still use the scouter to make sure that none of Frieza’s men are coming near us.”

“Oh yeah!” Gohan said, pleased that they didn’t have to stop their adventure before it even began. Dende could tell that Gohan desperately wanted to help out and to be honest Dende did as well. He didn’t like hiding away… he wanted to be out there doing SOMETHING. Maybe not fighting, as he’d never really enjoyed any of those lessons (he was rather proud to be part of the Dragon Tribe, unlike other younger Namekians who dreamed of being one of the rarer Warrior Tribe or rarer still Dragon Warrior Tribe), but still helping. “Come on, let’s go!”

With that the two boys rocketed off.

~MC~MC~MC~

“Aw, are you winded already?” Vegeta taunted as Dodoria gasped, clutching his stomach. It had nothing to do with being tired though and all to do with the devastating punch that Vegeta had landed on Dodoria’s belly. He had felt the Saiyan digging into his insides with the strike and knew that if it weren’t for his armor he would have ended up with a hole right in his middle. “Come now, Dodoria… where is your warrior pride?”

“I’ll-“ Dodoria began only to realize Vegeta had closed the gap between them far quicker than he’d realized, the Prince kicking him right in the side of the head. That sent Dodoria flying, tumbling through the air… only to come to a stop when Vegeta blasted into his path and caught him by the throat, holding him still for just a moment before he delivered a devastating punch to his face that had Dodoria’s brain rattling in his skull.

Though he couldn’t see him well thanks to the blow rattling his vision he could hear Vegeta as he purred, “What was that, Dodoria? You really must speak up.” He delivered another punch right to his throat, making Dodoria gag. “Come now… tell me to stop if I am getting to rough with you.”

Dodoria tried to gargle out a threat but nothing managed to get past his lips and after a moment Vegeta hurled him into the ground, Dodoria slamming into the green grass and forming a crater. He tried to push himself up and did manage to get to his knees, but any attempt to put weight on his ankle had him hissing in pain.

“This is what Frieza considers the elite of his forces?” Vegeta taunted from above him as Dodoria worked to get his heart to stop pounding and for his throat to allow him to breathe properly. He could tell that his right eye was swollen shut and his jaw ached something fierce but he was able to suck in a mouthful of air without it burning horrifically so that was a plus. It meant he was still in the fight and he could turn this around.

‘Might not have had a battle this tough in a long time… but Vegeta is still a little brat that don’t know his own limits. I can take him down still… I just need ta distract him…’ Out loud Dodoria said, “Aw, what’s the matter, Vegeta? Still upset ya weren’t chosen?” He forced himself to smile, even though the act hurt his jaw greatly. “Poor little Vegeta… so desperate for everyone ta love ‘im… ‘cept there ain’t anyone who gives a flyin’ fig about ya, do they? All alone in the universe… maybe because we all know what a waste ya truly are!”

But Vegeta, rather than going into a rant about how he was powerful and Dodoria should fear him… smiled.

“Why would I care about being part of Frieza’s elite forces… when I’ll be creating my own soon enough?” Dodoria slowly moved his hand behind him, hiding the energy ball he was forming. “That’s the problem with you, Dodoria… for such a big… big… BIG… man… you think terribly small.” He sneered at him and Dodoria forced himself not to react. He wanted Vegeta thinking he was weak and injured so he wouldn’t see what was about the happen… “Only concerned with pleasing your master instead of BECOMING the master! That is your problem, Dodoria. You lack vision. Frieza’s days are numbered. Everyone can see that. He is growing desperate as the universe catches up to him… as I catch up to him. Soon he will be cast down and-“

Dodoria thrust out his hand and fired off the Ki blast, striking Vegeta right in the face, causing his head to snap back.

“I think I thought ahead pretty well there!” he taunted as he struggled to get up, putting all his weight on his good leg. “And what was it ya told me? Focus on the here and the now? Ya were lookin’ too far ahead, Vegeta and-“

Vegeta slowly tilted his head down, revealing that the blast hadn’t even scratched him.

“Awwwwww… fuck,” Dodoria got out before moving to flee.

Vegeta however was on him in an instant, lashing out and shattering his other ankle.

“Where are you going, Dodoria?” Vegeta said mockingly as he purposely stepped down hard on the pink warrior’s leg, making him howl in pain. “I’ve never seen you run from a fight! Though, could that be because you always were so careful to choose your fights?” He ground his heel a bit into Dodoria’s limb before reaching down and forcing him to sit up a bit. “That is the difference between you and me, Dodoria. Where you were happy to have your easy fights I always sought out the harder ones. Yes, Nappa sheltered me far more than I wanted, but with him gone there is nothing to stop me from testing myself against stronger and stronger foes, so I can truly learn my limits… and break through them. Had he been here he would have stopped me from ever confronting you… and I would have missed out on this glorious beating.” He smirked and his free hand began to glow. “But now… I think our time has come to an end.”

“Wait!” Dodoria said desperately, reaching up and grasping at the hand that was holding him. “Wait! We don’t have ta be fightin’! We both have beef with Frieza… we can help each other!”

“That’s a funny thing to say, when I have you dead to rights,” Vegeta stated. “Whatever help do you think a broken thing like you could ever give me?”

“Information!” Dodoria declared. “The truth you don’t know!”

Vegeta scoffed at that. “And what might that be? What Frieza likes in his tea? What color socks Zarbon wears?”

“The truth… the truth about Planet Vegeta!” Dodoria got out. “It wasn’t a meteor that destroyed it!”

Vegeta’s mouth curled downward at that. “What are you talking about?”

Dodoria swallowed. The secret… it was one that could never be taken back if he spoke it. There would be no going back to Frieza if he revealed the truth. Vegeta would never be able to contain it and Frieza would know Dodoria was the one to speak the words. It would mean tossing aside all he had… but considering that he was about to lose everything to Vegeta there was no real choice.

“It… it was Lord Frieza!” Dodoria cried out. “He destroyed the planet! He feared ya Saiyans… there’s some prophecy, passed down by his ancestors. That there would be one who would become more than the average Saiyan Warrior. That he would discover a power that didn’t merely rival Frieza’s kind but eclipse them. The… the Super Saiyan!”

“The Super Saiyan?” Vegeta murmured, loosening his grip.

“Frieza is convinced that the Saiyans are a threat to him… that’s why he destroyed the planet! Its why he’s kept such a close eye on ya!” Dodoria smiled. “But… but the two of us could work together! I could train ya, help you reach new levels of power… and you could achieve the legend and destroy him!”

Vegeta let him go and Dodoria grunted in pain. Still… it meant that he was alive, which he would take any day of the week! The Saiyan prince shut his eyes and turned his head away from Dodoria, mouth pressed into a firm line. He was thinking… that was good. That was very-

“What training could someone so weak give me?” Vegeta asked before holding out his hand, Ki burning around his palm.

“WAIT!” Dodoria screamed, holding out his hands, pleading desperately. “I can tell you more-“

“You’ve told me enough,” Vegeta stated with a cruel smile. “Don’t worry Dodoria… I’ll make sure that Frieza knows everything you told me… that way when you two meet in Hell you will be able to have a long chat!”

“WAIT!”

“Galick Gun.”

Dodoria let out a scream as the attack hit him, his body torn apart by the blast, bit by bit ripped away until-

-then Dodoria hit the ground hard.

He looked about wildly, trying to figure out where he was. All he saw was endless sand. Trillions of grains of coarse dry said. He took a breath and found the air hot and dry. The sky was filled with a multitude of suns that were all burning fiercely, making the desert he was in blinding.

“I… I ain’t dead?” he said and at once he regretted it because it felt like just saying those four words had robbed his body of gallons of water. He got to his feet and marveled at the fact that he could actually stand; his ankles weren’t broken anymore and he could tell the swelling had gone down in his face. He rubbed his belly and smiled. “Alive…” he said even as he smacked his dry tongue against the roof of his mouth. The air was so hot it was robbing the moisture from him every time he tried to say a word!

“Oh, you are dead,” a voice rasped out and Dodoria turned to see a Namekian standing a few feet away from him, wearing baggy white clothes, green skin so dark it was nearly black. He was a withered thing, with no muscle at all on his bones. All there was to cover them was skin, which hung like floppy bits of cracked leather upon his arms and his skull. Which made the fact that he was so tall, looming over Dodoria like some thin reedy tree, all the more off-putting. “Been a long time since I got a guest… this will be fun. I will have to see if I’m rusty.”

And with that the King of Namekian Hell smirked before raising his hand and Dodoria looked about wildly before feeling something churn in his gut. He watched as from his mouth vapor began to ghost past his lips and he looked down in horror to see his skin begin to grow dry and cracked, his bloated form slowly squishing in on itself. His stomach crumbling like a pastry that hadn’t been allowed to rise properly. Limbs draining away like a hose emptied of it’s contents. He reached out and he tried to draw the vapor back… but more and more of it was coming out, stolen away.

“Hmmm… going slower than normal,” the demon said. “Ah well… we have plenty of time.“

As for Dodoria…

…his throat was too dry even to scream.

Chapter Text

“Please, I must see Lord Guru at once!” Viol said, staring at the unmoving form of Nail. The Namekian had arrived in a panic, barely able to get out his words. Nail had of course been concerned, giving him some water to drink and begging him to take a moment to settle himself. Finally able to string some words together Viol had given his name and then… “It is very important! The entire planet is at stake!”

“And I told you that you can address such concerns to me,” Nail replied. “I will then determine if they are worthy of Lord Guru’s attention.”

Viol frowned at that and Nail fought back to urge to sigh in frustration. He knew what Viol was thinking. ‘There is Nail, the horrible door guard who is refusing to allow Lord Guru to hear what he needs to hear. He will never let me in, no matter what, and he will mock me for what I have come to tell him! Perhaps if I insult him that will get him to give in…’

Sure enough Viol narrowed his eyes and glowered at Nail. “We don’t have time for your stubbornness! Lord Guru must learn of this at once!”

“And I have told you that you will be able to see him but only after you tell me what the problem is.”

“You fool!” the other Namekian thundered. “You rock-headed fool! Every moment you waste more of our people suffer!”

“I waste?” Nail said, remaining calm even if inside of him swirled utter frustration. “You could have told me your issues several times over by now, so that I could have taken the proper action. Instead you insist on seeing Lord Guru-“

“He is our leader. I have no time to bicker with his bodyguard.” With that Viol tried to shove his way through but Nail merely stepped in his way, glaring at the younger Namekian. Viol tried to rush him, screaming for Lord Guru, but Nail merely continued to remain in his way, refusing to budge. “Move at once you-“

“Nail,” the deep voice of Lord Guru called out from his home. “Show him in.”

Taking a single calming breath Nail moved aside, Viol giving a smug little smirk at his victory before he continued inside. Nail, for his part, called upon all the training he’d received in calming his raging emotions to settle himself down, knowing that it would do no good for him to fly off the handle. It would do no good for him to get upset either; not in just that moment but for his future either.

‘As much as I might want to,’ Nail thought bitterly. ‘All I do for Namek and my people and they still treat me like this. I was celebrated when I was born… and then within weeks was seen as the oddity that could be ignored and brushed aside. The one that never fit in, the one that wasn’t actually a member of the Namekian Race. And now they view me as the villain in all their tales.’ He shut his eyes. ‘How-‘

He moved to stand behind Viol, near the door so that he could still protect Lord Guru both from threats that might come as well as Viol. While he didn’t want to ever think that a fellow Namekian would turn on their own kind he had heard from the elders enough tales of the Lost Hopes to know that even Namekians had it within them to commit great evils.

And considering what they had sensed an hour ago…

“Lord Guru,” Viol exclaimed, staring up at the leader of Namek. It always interested Nail to see how his fellow Namekians reacted to the sight of Lord Guru. Though each of them had seen him as children, and his doors were open to them (so long as they followed the proper protocol), they always seemed to act as if it were the first time they had laid eyes on him. He was the largest Namekian on the planet, towering over even Nail, who was after Guru the tallest of their race. And he was quite large as well, so big that he couldn’t get through the door that was used by all other Namekians to enter his home; no, when Guru wished to leave his home and take in the splendor of Namek he had Nail remove the roof, so that he could slowly float out.

His great size came from his power, as was true of all Namekians. It was said that in the prime of his life he had towered over all, with some whispering that he had been well over 100 feet tall in just his regular form and that, when he took on his Great Namekian Form, he had been thousands of feet tall. When Nail had been a child he had delighted in trying to find the ponds and lakes that were actually Lord Guru’s footmarks. Guru himself had laughed when Nail had told him about that years later, telling his student that at most he had been 40 feet tall. Still VERY large but not the titan that so many made him out to be in the tales, catching meteors with his bare hands.

As with all Namekians as he had gotten older his body had begun to compact, becoming far denser. Height was lost and his form expanded to the sides to compensate for that. The result is what outsiders would have called ‘fat’ but in reality was all pure muscle. Just… condensed down. Lord Guru, in fact, was stronger than he was when he had strolled across Namek’s surface, a single step taking him lengths across the planet. He could have crushed stone by just squeezing his fingers together, all his muscles compacted down to give him far greater power. And to harm him? Nail didn’t think there was any power in the universe that could destroy Lord Guru.

‘That’s what my fellow Namekians don’t understand,’ Nail thought to himself. ‘I am not protecting Lord Guru from them… I am protecting them from Lord Guru. He knows his strength is so great that if he made the wrong move he could easily reduce them to a paste. While he has the best control I have ever seen he still fears what he could do… thus, why I am here.’

“L-l-l-lord Guru,” Viol stammered, suddenly quite nervous. He rung his hands together and looked down, Lord Guru smiling at that. The gesture caused the many wrinkles in his face to pull and twitch and at once the heavy scowl that he always appeared to be wearing disappeared into a look of gentle kindness.

“Why do you tremble, my boy?” he asked softly… or at least softly for him. For everyone else it was a deep sound, one that seemed to roll through their forms and touch the very core of them. “You are safe here.”

“But… but that is why I have come, Lord Guru! None of us are safe! A terrible evil has arrived and invaded the planet!”

“This is grave news,” Lord Guru said, his smile falling. “Did you tell Nail?”

Viol started at that. “I… Lord Guru?”

“Nail is our greatest fighter. I have tasked him to carry out many of the actions and deeds that I can no longer see too. If there is one being on this planet that I would trust to aid us in this dark time it would be Nail. Did you inform him of this? Is he already out there working to repel the invaders?”

Nail forced himself not to smirk. Lord Guru knew he was there… he could sense his energy. Just as he had known that the invaders had arrived; both he and Nail had felt their coming. They hadn’t taken any action yet as they were waiting for more information; only fools rushed out without a second thought to deal with a danger they didn’t understand, after all. Lord Guru though wasn’t pleased with what had happened outside of his home and this was his way, even in the middle of a crisis, to teach one of his fellow Namekians a lesson.

“I… I came to tell you the news-“ Viol began only to suddenly find himself utterly tongue-tied.

“Yes, you did. But instead you insulted Nail, my apprentice and successor. He asked you for the information, to determine if it was truly worthy of my time.”

“It is!” Viol exclaimed. “The invaders-“

“Will be stopped by Nail, not me,” the eldest of the Namekians said firmly but also gently. “My days of fighting are over, Viol… you know this. The end of my life is far closer than the beginning… it is far closer than my middle years!” He let out a laugh at that. It was short and a bit weezy but it was there. “Nail is the one that will be protecting you all soon… why do you not trust him?”

“I… I thought…”

“You didn’t though, did you?” Lord Guru didn’t say the words in a rude or judgmental way. He stated them with kindness, the same way the Elders had asked Nail why he had scrapped his knee when he was supposed to be studying. “You believed that I was the only one that could solve your problems… but that is ignoring your friends. Your elders. Your brothers. You can not always rush to me for your problems… while I am more than willing to give you advice you must realize that sometimes there are those that are better suited for such things than I.”

Nail could tell that Viol didn’t like that answer. That for him Lord Guru was the solution to every problem. That one only needed to go to the eldest of the Namekians and every problem would be solved. He most likely thought that just speaking with Lord Guru would fix everything. That the Elder and leader of their people would raise his arms and suddenly the invaders would be cast away and all the waters would taste sweet forever.

“Do not look so down,” Lord Guru said. “We have faced strife before.”

“I’m not sure if we have faced anything like this though,” Viol said. “A group of people arrived on the planet… they brought one of the Lost Hopes with them.”

Nail’s eyes went wide. “A Lost Hope?”

Lord Guru was just as struck, leaning forward in his seat. “A Lost Hope found… is this… the threat?”

“No! He is not. He’s… he’s not.” It took Nail by nearly as much surprise that Viol was so protective of the Lost Hope as the fact that there WAS a Lost Hope once more on Namek. “There… Elder Sax says there is evil in his heart but it is no different than many of us. That he is merely someone who survived a strange world and that his heart remains rather pure.”

“That is good to hear,” Lord Guru said with a shallow nod. “A pity then that his arrival comes just as another threat arrives. What do you know of these invaders?”

“They are led by one called Frieza,” Viol said. “The new arrivals told us that one of their number used to work for him, but has since turned against him. He is a tyrant that seeks to cleanse worlds and then sell them to others for their own purposes.”

“Sell Namek?” Nail exclaimed in shock.

But Lord Guru raised his hand. “You have more to say, Viol?”

“Yes, Lord Guru. It seems that Frieza isn’t here to claim our planet. Rather… it’s the Dragon Balls!”

At once Nail saw the danger and the threat. ‘Someone like these Frieza with the power of the Dragon Balls? Even being allowed to make three wishes to Porunga is far too great of a threat! He would be able to do so much harm not just to Namek but the entire universe!’ He found himself looking to Lord Guru and the Dragon Ball that remained near him at all times. The Eldest of the Namekians slowly reached over and patted the Dragon Ball.

“Do you have a plan to tell us, Viol?”

The villager nodded. “The new arrivals are helping Elder Sax and many of us carve a great cavern into the bedrock of Namek. We hope to hide ourselves away, to weather this storm. They have amongst them a metal being, Isco, and he is attempting to destroy the devices they are using to find the Dragon Balls. If we are able to do that then Frieza will not be able to make his wish!”

“And instead this Frieza may very well choose to bathe our planet in flames,” Nail pointed out. Viol’s eyes went wide at that and he began to stammer and stumble over his words, like his tongue had become too thick and bloated for his mouth. “Don’t worry,” Nail said but the other Namekian continued to spiral into a panic. “I said don’t worry… I was only pointing out what could happen. You don’t need to freak out.” He narrowed his eyes as the Namekian villager began to rock back and forth, wringing his hands together. “I mean it… calm down! Take a breath! Stop-“

Lord Guru held up a hand and at once Viol turned to him with wide eyes, pleading with him to make everything better. Nail at once admired Lord Guru for being able to bring such ease to others and at the same time hated that the elder Namekian was able to do that. Especially with how easily he brought Viol’s stammers to a halt.

“It is a good plan to start with,” Lord Guru stated. “But we must do more than that. You will show Nail where you have begun to work on the hiding place for our people. The Dragon Ball will be taken with you but it will NOT be kept there. I will share with Nail, and only Nail, information on several secret caverns that only I know of. I would also suggest that you work with Elder Sax and the other village elders to create more caverns spread out amongst the planet. We must not allow ourselves to become lax due to having a single good plan.”

“Of course Lord Guru!” Viol declared, nodding hard. “I will speak to the others. And I am sure, when you discuss things with the visitors you will be able to advise them well.”

“Hmmm. Perhaps. Now, please leave me and Nail. I must give him the information.”

Viol bowed and quickly hurried outside, leaving Nail and Lord Guru all alone. Nail turned but saw that his mentor was staring at him rather intently, focusing all his attention upon him.

That… wasn’t a good sign.

“You are upset, Nail,” Lord Guru said. “I sensed it the moment you entered here. What troubles you?”

“These invaders-“ Nail began but Lord Guru mere shot him a look and Nail sighed. “No. It wasn’t that. My apologizes.” He bowed before continuing on. “When Viol came he… he refused to listen to me.” Nail shook his head in frustration. “I train and I train. You have told them all that I will be the next Grand Elder of Namek when you pass… I hope that day never comes, of course, but I know it will and I prepare for it. And still my brothers refuse to listen to me! They turn to you, Lord Guru, and dismiss me as a mere guard. They show me no respect at all and I wonder how I am supposed to lead them when they do not view me as a leader!”

Lord Guru was silent for several long moments, considering all Nail had said. He knew there was no rushing the Grand Elder; Lord Guru would speak when he was ready and not a second more. That was his way. It had been a hard lesson for Nail to learn. When he had been young he had thought that Lord Guru’s silence was judgment upon him… a negative thing that showed he’d upset his mentor. As such he’d ended up constantly babbling and rambling, trying to fill the air in an attempt to correct his ‘mistake’. He would suddenly change his mind and declare what he had suggested was bad and horrible and he was so sorry… only for Lord Guru to smile and say that he had actually rather liked the idea and didn’t understand why Nail was now suddenly against it. Time had gotten him to see that his mentor would talk when he was ready. ‘Haste makes waste’ Lord Guru had once told him when he had asked him why he always thought over his answers. When Nail had questioned what would happen if Lord Guru missed out on something because he was going over his options the Grand Elder had merely chuckled and told him “Then it wasn’t worth it”.

“Respect is not a river,” Lord Guru finally said.

“I don’t understand,” Nail admitted.

“It does not flow one way, Nail. You do not respect your fellow Namekians so they do not respect you.”

“Don’t… don’t…” Nail found he was the one stammering. “Lord Guru, everything I do is for them! All of my training! It is to be the best leader I can be for them!”

“An Elder can be wise. Cunning. Full of wisdom. Powerful beyond measure. But one that does not care for those he serves will never be a strong leader.” Lord Guru shook his head when Nail opened his mouth to protest. “When Viol first appeared you told him he could not talk to me.”

“Yes. But I also told him he needed to tell me what was wrong.”

“You said that you would hear what he had to say and then determine if I should hear it or if it was a matter that you should handle on your own.”

“Yes. Exactly.” But even as Nail said the words he knew that wasn’t the answer Lord Guru wanted.

“He didn’t need dictation of the rules, Nail. He needed comfort. You could have told him that you saw he was scared and that we would help him. But first he needed to tell you what was wrong.”

“He would have just insisted that only you could help him.” Nail sighed. “They always do that, Lord Guru. They never want to come to me.”

“Because you have given them no reason to come to you, Nail. Your heart is set against them, seeing them as judging you. And thus you fulfill your own prophecy.” Lord Guru took a long breath at that. “Perhaps… perhaps this invasion will be the moment where you learn how to become the leader our people need… and not the one you BELIEVE they need.” He gave a nod at that. “Yes… yes, I believe this will help you greatly, Nail.”

“I… yes, Lord Guru,” Nail said, pushing aside his own doubts. ‘They will never respect me… they will always see me as just a shade of you. How can I hope they will listen to me when they will always be turning towards you?’ He didn’t say such thoughts aloud, knowing that Lord Guru wouldn’t be pleased with them. He always saw the best in their people and thought they could do such great things… but Nail knew that even Namekians with their pure hearts could fall prey to jealousy and envy.

There were many on Namek who disliked that he had been chosen as Lord Guru’s successor. They felt he was too young, had not lived long enough… and in Nail’s opinion too offended to the idea that the Grand Elder would ever leave them. For years Nail had been forced to deal with their eyes constantly watching him, waiting for him to slip up. And when he didn’t they then watched him to see just why they should bother listening to him at all. He had long become used to having every action weighed by his fellow Namekians and be found wanting.

“Now then,” Lord Guru said, taking the Dragon Ball and placing it in Nail’s hands before using his other to touch his head. At once the Grand Elder sent to him the information he needed, of the secret caves hidden behind a waterfall. A cave that went very deep… in fact it had been the cave, Nail realized thanks to the memories, where Lord Guru had hidden the eggs he had created that had become the Namekian race. “You know where to go. Travel with Viol to the visitors. Speak with them, especially the Lost Hope and the one that has turned against the invaders. Find out what they know and how they can assist us. Then hide this Dragon Ball… keep it secret and safe Nail.”

“Of course, Lord Guru… but would it not be better for you to hold onto it for a little longer? At least until we are at the caverns they are carving out?”

Lord Guru shook his head at that. “No, Nail. I will not be coming with you.”

“You… Lord Guru!” Nail exclaimed. “You must come!”

“My days of travel are behind me, Nail. This home is where I have chosen to spend my final days and I will not be leaving it.”

“But… but the invaders!” Nail protested. “They will find you, Lord Guru! Even if the visitors destroy the devices they have that allow them to track energy they will see this place! It is all alone and will draw their attention. And if any among them can sense energy…”

Lord Guru slowly held up his hand. “That… is what I am hoping for, Nail.” He stared at his mentor in shock. “These invaders must be distracted until plans to fight against them are created. I fear already several villages will fall to them… their sacrifices will be remembered for allowing the rest of the Namekian people survive. I… will be another distraction. I will draw their attention to me and then I will do all I can to befuddle them and keep them focused on me alone. That will buy all of you the time you need.”

“I… I don’t-“

“Nail,” Lord Guru said gently. “You are a prodigy. The greatest fighter… and the greatest mind. You are able to blend the talents of the Dragon and Warrior Tribes into one. You were born to lead our people… and I know you will. I do not give this Dragon Ball over to you to merely hide. I give it to you… because it is yours now.”

Nail swallowed as he ran his hands along the relic’s surface. It pulsed in time with his heart and he knew at once that Lord Guru had passed the control of the Dragon Balls onto him. He was their guardian now and it would be through him they would get their strength. His life would see them grow… his death would see them fade.

He found… he wasn’t ready.

“I will hide this, Lord Guru. I will meet with the others. And we will come up with a plan to drive these invaders back. And I will enjoy giving this back to you, so you might care for it for years to come.”

The Grand Elder smiled at that but also shook his head. “Do not allow yourself to become bewitched by the dream of saving me, Nail. I have lived a good life… far better than I ever dreamed. I knew I would never see Namek fully restored but I have lived long enough to see our race pull itself from the very brink of extinction. Do not mourn me and do not wonder what might have been. Think of me and smile. And… pass on not just what I have taught you… but what you yourself will learn.” He dipped his head at that. “Now… go, Lord Nail.”

Nail squeezed his eyes shut before finally nodding. “Till we meet again, Lord Guru.”

He emerged from Lord Guru’s house to find Viol pacing nervously, looking up at the sky. He didn’t blame him for that… he could sense that the invaders were on the move and while not heading in their direction depending on where they needed to go they might need to rely upon some tricky flying in order to get to their destination.

“Come, Viol, let’s go.”

“What of Lord Guru?”

Nail opened his mouth but then shut it.

He thought for a long moment.

“I… can not speak of his plan,” he finally said, knowing that Viol needed hope that Guru would be alright.

Hope that Nail didn’t have.

~MC~MC~MC~

“How is it coming, Isco?” Krillin asked, walking up to the robotic figure. Isco, or rather the Isco that was in his fighting form, was sitting on the ground, a scouter in his hand, wires connecting the two of them. “Any luck taking down the scouters?”

“Oh, I have long done that,” Isco replied in his normal elitist tones. “This Frieza clearly is only managing to dominate weak fleshy creatures because if he were to face off with an empire of machines he would face destruction in days. His firewalls and anti-viral systems are non-existent. I dare say what we use to protect Gohan’s tablet so he doesn’t stumble on even the most mild of dangers upon the internet is stronger than what Frieza and his forces are using to protect their equipment.”

“And considering this is Chichi we’re talking about…” Krillin said with a chuckle. He had never found out exactly what was on the VERY long list of No-No topics that Chichi had wanted banned from Gohan’s “innocent little eyes” but he could wager on a bunch of it. “So, barely tissue paper?”

Isco shook his head. “Not even that, sir. There is nothing here to protect the systems against an attack by a malicious source.”

“Namely, you.”

If he could have smiled Krillin knew that Isco would be beaming at that. “Indeed. I can not tell if it is arrogance on his part or stupidity that has kept him from actually taking the most simple of actions to protect his systems… but I do plan to make him regret it for all his days.”

“Isco…” Krillin said slowly.

“I am merely doing as Avo would do,” the robot said. “Do not leave a knife to stab you in the back. One, if given a chance to destroy a tyrant, does not let such a possibility pass by.”

Krillin’s jaw worked at that. “It doesn’t seem right though.”

“He is a blood thirsty tyrant that, according to Raditz, destroyed an entire planet purely because he wanted to.” Isco turned and stared right at Krillin. “He laughed, according to what Raditz learned. He laughed as the Saiyan Race burned. Never mind if they deserved it or not for their own evil actions… Frieza laughed.” Isco twisted his head back to the scouter. “And now… so will I.”

Krillin took a deep breath. ‘As much as I might not like it… Isco is right. From everything we’ve heard about Frieza he is like a hundred Vegetas. Not just in terms of powers but sadism.’ Raditz hadn’t spared anything in telling them all just how dangerous Frieza was and all the horrifying things he had done as he spread his influence across the galaxy. The lives he had ruined, sometimes not merely for profit as he claimed but because it was clear he simply wanted to. He didn’t even had a good reason for what he did other than boredom some days.

‘And those that work with him… nearly all of them aren’t innocents,’ Krillin thought. That had been one of Avo’s ideas, to suggest that maybe they could try and stage a bit of a mutiny amongst Frieza’s forces.

“Maybe if we give them someone else to fight for?” Kayos had suggested on the flight to Namek. “Raditz can attest that the Z Warriors are a better option. For one thing we won’t kill you if you do a bad job.” He had bobbed his head back and forth at that. “I mean, sure, you steal the meat and Goku and Raditz might break you in half and if you even think about giving me a fucking salad-“ He had lit up both his hands at that, evil and good magic swirling around them.

Raditz though had shaken his head. “It won’t work. There might be some in the Frieza Force who are being forced to work for him… the low level peons. The grunt work and the office drones and the support staff. Maybe a few nurses at the medical stations. Ones that might make a bit of noise but more often than not have learned that in order to survive one needs to keep their heads down. Don’t think though that all of them are like that. Frieza doesn’t take slaves, not for the rank and file certainly. He understands that slaves make poor workers and often times cost more to watch than just paying a skilled worker. The people that work for the Frieza Force watching the budgets or buying the supplies? They do so willingly. And they know what Frieza does. They aren’t blind to it.

“But the ones that can actually fight?” He had shook his head. “They aren’t happy to be working for Frieza but they won’t work with us. They would see us as jokes. Weak pathetic things that would keep them from the slaughter they enjoy. Frieza does not employ noble heroes who fight the good fight. His warriors are the traitors, the scoundrels, the opportunists. That’s who he employs and they are not the kind of people we want anywhere near us.”

It had been startling to realize that RADITZ was perhaps the most calm and rational of Frieza’s soldiers.

‘I can’t imagine knowing what Frieza does and being okay with it,’ Krillin thought darkly. ‘To know that someone you work for is a monster and not just accepting that but also aiding them? Its wrong. Its simply wrong.’ He looked at Isco and said, “Just what are you going to do?”

“Oh… take down a few systems. Brick others. While it would be easy to enter their systems and just cause all their ships to crash that might get me noticed… already there are some who are realizing what I’m doing and trying to cut off communications so I can’t spread as far. That is at least giving me some entertainment, you see. They aren’t attacking me or throwing me out but they are forcing me to take paths that I hadn’t considered. All very interesting of course…” He trailed off at that.

“How is it going?” Bulma asked as she walked up, wiping her hands on a rag.

“Good enough. Hopefully everything Isco is doing will distract Frieza and keep him from realizing just what we are doing. How goes the ship?”

“Not great,” Bulma admitted. “I can’t figure out where to send it.” She tapped a button on her wrist and a projection appeared of Namek; Krillin couldn’t help but whistle at the latest invention Bulma had within her arsenal. It honestly made him glad she was on their side. “So originally I was going to send the ship back up into lower orbit, so that it could be protected in case a fight happened but also be able to arrive quick enough if we needed to leave. Might have been uncomfortable but all of us could have managed flying up to it even with the lower mix of oxygen in the air.” She tapped a few more buttons and suddenly four of the Frieza Force ships appeared around the planet. “Frieza and his men arriving when they did was the best and worst thing ever. I’m glad they didn’t arrive later because then they would have spotted the ship and destroyed it. But them arriving at all… it means that now the ship is grounded.” Lines began to appear all around the planet, green in color only to be intersected by the red lines of the Frieza Force ships. “They hit it every time.”

“Except they don’t,” Raditz said as he walked over, dropping one of the large boulders he’d been moving out of the cavern site with a heavy thud. He gestured at the hologram. “You are working with incomplete information.”

“Then by all means, give me what I’m missing,” Bulma said, placing her hand on her hip and flashing a challenging look at Raditz.

“This large one that’s landed, that’s Frieza’s ship,” he stated. “It has the most shielding and warriors. This one is here is the backup ship… mostly used for the lower level grunts. Good fighters but even one of us could take most of them down.” He pointed at the third and fourth ships. “These ones will be the supply ship and the support ship. Supply is exactly what it sounds like: supplies. The food and water, the extra armor, so on. The Support ship has the communication central hub as well as the medical crew; while Frieza keeps a few doctors on his own ship most of the warriors who get injured end up going to the Support Ship.”

“I’m surprised he cares at all,” Krillin said. “I’d have assumed if you got hurt he’d toss you aside.”

“Oh, if your injuries were enough that you cause a problem and there was no recovery he’d toss you to the wolves,” Raditz said with a shrug. “That’s part of the reason why Vegeta killed Nappa… with him injured as he was Vegeta figured that Frieza would have ordered his death no matter what. There are a lot of the Frieza Force Soldiers who make clear to their squadmates to kill them if they are crippled… it’s a kindness.” Bulma pressed her lips together at that and Krillin didn’t blame her as he also found Raditz’s statement to be utterly distasteful. “But if you just have some cuts that need mending or need to spend a day or so in a medical pod then that will be fine. Maybe you get some lesser assignments and eventually if it keeps happening you get booted right back down to the grunts but Frieza figures, again, that its better to keep soldiers who have already been trained than to deal with the hassle of getting new ones up to snuff. He doesn’t have the patience to deal with newbies, even if he doesn’t have to interact with them at all.”

“Okay… so maybe our ship can handle the Support Ship? I mean, how many guns could it have on it anyway?”

“It can handle any of them, at least in terms of flying away,” Raditz stated. “None of Frieza’s ships have weapons installed.”

Bulma fell to the ground in shock.

“Well,” Krillin said, rubbing the top of his head in thought, “I guess that makes things easier on us.”

At once Bulma popped back up and screeched, “Why would he not have weapons installed!?! There is no way he could be that dumb!”

“Would would he bother?” Raditz asked. “Ships don’t fight in space.”

“…yes they do!”

Raditz shot her a dry look. “Oh really. Get in a lot of space battles down on Earth?”

“No but… everyone knows that… you know, in the movies… gah!” Bulma threw her hands up in frustration. “Whatever! You know what I mean!”

“I really don’t,” Raditz stated. “You don’t fire on a ship in space. That’s just silly. That’s like putting guns on one of those long people mover that you have on Earth.” Krillin realized that Raditz was most likely referring to trains. “They move people WITH guns or who are powerful enough not to need them to where they need to be. Why have weapons installed at all?”

“I… its just…”

“Technically we don’t have guns on the ship either,” Krillin pointed out, which only made Bulma glower all the more. But, after a few moments she let out a sigh and smiled.

“Okay, so there is no problem with us sending out the ship then!”

“What? No.” Raditz shook his head. “We can’t send out the ship. That would risk it being destroyed.”

“You… you just said Frieza doesn’t have any guns on his ships!”

“Yeah,” Raditz said with a shrug, “but he can still send out warriors to fight it.”

Once more Bulma felt to the ground.

“Someone’s coming… and they are alone,” Chiaotzu said, coming to the rear of the box canyon where the Z Fighters were gathered. It had been his turn to stand watch, to keep an eye out not just for Frieza’s men but also for any of the scouts and messengers that Elder Sax had sent out.

“Maybe its Larin,” Krillin suggested. “I wish we could have gone to look for him but we couldn’t risk it… not with all the villagers we had to bring back here.”

Senza though shook his head, walking up with Elder Sax. “It isn’t Larin. I would recognize his energy even this short of a time knowing him.”

Elder Sax nodded. “That is Obo.” And with that his face grew grim, the lines around his mouth deepening. “I sent him to the Southern Shore Village. If he is returning early…”

They didn’t have long to wait as, after about 5 or so minutes, the tall Dragon Tribe Namekian hurried to them, panting hard. Elder Sax commanded him to stop and rest, Senza bringing him some water which the Namekian gulped down in huge mouthfuls.

“Frieza got to the village before you could, didn’t he?” Senza asked.

Obo managed a nod and Senza sighed at that, looking to Bulma who used her hologram projector to now show a chart. On one side was cartoony drawings of her and the other Z Fighter’s faces. The the other was a scowling Frieza, based on Raditz’ descriptions. And in the middle were different Namekian faces, each one within a Dragon Ball. Two, labeled Elder Sax and Elder Mori, were on the Z Fighter’s side of the chart. Bulma sadly moved the one from the South Shore Village to Frieza’s side.

“On one hand we know that Frieza can’t get his wish,” she said. “But on the other we can’t make any wishes either.” Elder Sax had explained that Porunga could grant three wishes and the hope was to use one or two to remove Frieza and his Forces from Namek and hide its location before using the final wish to bring back Master Roshi.

But now that was in doubt.

“It was… horrible,” Obo stated. “I arrived just as the invader was leaving. I think its only because he was distracted by the arrival of the rest of his allies that kept him from sensing me.”

That made Raditz frown, however. “His scouter should have alerted him.”

“His scouter?” Obo said as Isco held up the device in question.

“This here.”

“He wasn’t wearing a scouter then,” Obo stated.

“That’s really odd…” Krillin said in deep thought. “Do you think that Frieza’s forces have figured out how to sense energy?”

Raditz though was clearly worried about something else. “What did the attacker look like?”

Obo frowned. “Well… a bit like you, to be honest. Shorter hair… shorter in height as well. But he had a tail-“

“Vegeta,” Radtiz said darkly. “Frieza must have sent him… he saw Shenron, after all.” Raditz balled his hand up into a fist. “or just as likely he learned of this planet and decided to go after the Dragon Balls himself. That is something Vegeta would do.” He looked to the others. “This is bad.”

“Okay but… it doesn’t change much,” Bulma said. “He’s no different than any other warrior Frieza has.”

“Unless he can sense energy now,” Senza pointed out. “We know that Saiyans can pick that trick up quick.” He nodded towards Raditz.

“That’s why Bulma just needs to get the energy blockers ready!” Krillin declared. “She does that and we are all set!”

“I suppose you’re right…” Senza said.

“Gohan!” Chichi cried out, rushing to them. “Has anyone seen Gohan?”

Raditz narrowed his eyes… before then went wide with horror. “That little brat…”

“Vegeta is out there,” Bulma gasped. “If he senses Gohan-“

“Vegeta… Vegeta is on this planet?” Chichi said, beginning to pant hard. “My baby is out there and Vegeta could find him?”

“Chichi, wait,” Krillin began but Chichi’s ki aura exploded out of her.

“GOHAN!” she roared, launching herself out of the canyon, Raditz right behind her.

“Damn it,” Senza hissed, looking to Elder Sax. “Stay here! We’ll bring them back! Krillin!”

“Right!” Krillin declared, flying off after the others. ‘I hope we can find him… I’d hate to imagine what would happen if Vegeta beats us to Gohan first!’

Chapter Text

Zarbon’s mind raced as he looked at the message he had received. Part of him desperately wished that it was a voice message, so he could just play that for Lord Frieza. ‘Or even better have the coward be here and tell Lord Frieza himself.’

But no… the scout had decided to send a written message, knowing that it would mean that Zarbon had to give the information to their lord in person. And he had remained out in the field, refusing to return to the flagship. Oh, the scout was cunning and didn’t say he was refusing… he came up with some silly claims that he was only sending the message because he was searching for pockets of Namekian resistance… but Zarbon knew the truth. The bastard was hiding.

‘He didn’t even give me his name,’ Zarbon thought darkly as he left his office, making sure to lock up before beginning the walk down the hall. ‘I can’t even push the blame onto him because I don’t know who it is.’ It was all above board; it was common for scouts to leave messages that weren’t signed, especially if they had been instructed to infiltrate a planet.

Many of their enemies thought that the Frieza Force was just filled with big dumb brutes who stomped their way about planets, firing off recklessly until they had destroyed everything and anything they could find. That they didn’t think or plan and instead just saw all the universe as something to smash. But that wasn’t the case at all. Yes, there were buyers who requested a cleansed planet, with everything left in ruin so they could set about strip mining it without having to deal with the buildings and such. Or who didn’t want any reminder of who had come before so that the previous inhabitants were lost to history.

But there were just as many who wanted as much as possible left intact. Sometimes it was a logistics issue… after all, why bother building roads and schools and buildings and power lines and waste pipes when they already existed! No different than purchasing a fully furnished house… well, except that in those cases the previous owner WANTED to leave. Other times it was because what was there was meaningful to the people that wanted to claim the planet. A few years earlier Frieza had been approached by a proud race, the Armurs. They dwelled on several different planets that were great distances from each other and lost contact with one of their sibling worlds. It had been found that a parasitic alien race had arrived there, fed on the inhabitants, and then moved in. Their President, Greeve, wished to reclaim the planet but not damage any of the buildings. Not have any of the structures that had stood for hundreds of years be destroyed. They could do it themselves but understood that sometimes it was best to send an expert and thus hired Frieza, even offering bonuses for every building that was undamaged.

Rather than send the likes of the Ginyus, the Saiyans, or even Zarbon or Dodoria, Frieza had sent in his scouts and infiltrators. It had taken 18 months but in the end they had been able to kill so much of the population that the invasive aliens had fled, thinking the planet was cursed… and ended up RIGHT in the firing line of the Frieza Force that had been lying in wait. That had been a good job… they had made a ton of money and Frieza had even signed a contract with the Armurs for them to provide materials to create new body armor for the Frieza Force. Greeve had bowed to Frieza and thanked him for his work and Frieza had commented after they’d left that he wished all his buyers were so reasonable.

Zarbon shook his head. ‘You are getting distracted,’ he scolded himself. ‘You need to be focused on other things… especially if you are going to be meeting with Lord Frieza and giving him this news.’ He twisted the message in his head a thousand different ways, trying to find some way to portray it as a good thing. That was the trick when it came to Lord Frieza: one had to find a way to figure out the pro of a situation. ‘It was so much easier under King Cold.’

Zarbon missed his former employer greatly. King Cold had been far more even tempered than Frieza… the Prince could suddenly fly into rages and then, just as quickly chuckle and laugh at a situation. And he hated bad news, no matter how minor it was. If a planet was taken and every member of the team had returned without a scratch but had lost one of their scouters Frieza would rage at the cost of replacing it and demand they be punished, forcing Zarbon and Dodoria to often get creative in how they ‘punished’ the Frieza Force Soldiers; if they did as Frieza commanded every time there would be no soldiers left to fight. King Cold though was far more willing to give his men leeway… but also there to support them. Zarbon could ask him his opinion on a mission and get back plenty of advice. Frieza would declare ‘That is why I am paying you’ and command that Zarbon stop bothering him. And King Cold didn’t mind bad news… he understood that sometimes failures happened and so long as you already had a plan to correct things then he was willing to give a second chance. Only a second chance… but that was all that was needed.

‘He would have cured me by now,’ Zarbon thought darkly. ‘If he were still around he would have made sure that my curse was lifted.’

It was his greatest shame and the reason why Zarbon had sought out King Cold. His people, the Pomades, were known for their savageness. Their planet was avoided at all costs because to land there was a death sentence unless one had the power and weaponry to fight back. They lived in mud huts and fought constantly amongst themselves; they had never been able to advance beyond stone tools. And they were crude disgusting beings. They loved to eat and would expel wind without thought during meals and would talk with their mouths full. They defecated anywhere and everywhere and took pleasure in the stink they could produce. They loved all things slimy and rotten, seeing beauty in that, or at least as much beauty as their kind could find in anything. They didn’t fight in wars because that would require the Pomades to actually have some sense of structure, which they did not. Instead they merely had battles that could start up at any moment. It was said that one should become concerned if a Pomade meal hadn’t seen at least three different fights break out.

Zarbon had always known he was different but truly hadn’t understood until Dr. Flask had found him and begun working with him. The mad genius, for only someone half crazed would ever consider landing on Poma to study the creatures that lived there, had thought that it was only a matter of education that kept the Pomades from rising up and becoming something more. He had found Zarbon when he was just a little pollywog, and taken him away from his family… something Zarbon was grateful for as he was quite sure his mother or siblings would have eaten him had the urge struck them. Dr. Flask had then set about working to teach Zarbon how to be more than his people. How to speak. How to think. To move with grace and dignity. Understanding himself and others and how they interacted. All of this until, at long last, Zarbon had become something more.

But… the monster was still inside of him, clawing to get out.

It was why he had come to work with King Cold. He had said that he had many scientists working for him and he was interested in Zarbon. Wanted to see just what he could do. And… if given the time… perhaps his scientists could cure him of his transformation and allow him to be fully who he wished. To not need to rely upon the beast within in order to defeat foes.

‘Had he remained in charge I would have been cured,’ Zarbon thought as he neared Frieza’s chamber. ‘But then he retired and F Ridge Station was destroyed and I was trapped. Stuck barely holding onto my grace and working for Lord Frieza…’

He forced such thoughts from his head, not wanting to even let them bubble up in his brain. He would not survive long if Lord Frieza sensed a bit of rebellion within him.

Still, that left him with a problem: he could only focus on the bad news he had to share with Lord Frieza and he had no idea how he was going to be able to spin it to keep himself safe for the Prince’s rage.

“Enter,” Frieza said and Zarbon swallowed before walking into the room.

“Lord Frieza,” Zarbon said, kneeling.

“Have you received word from Dodoria yet?” Frieza asked. “It should not be taking him this look to track down those fools that dared to interfere with my plans. He better have a good excuse or I swear I will end his miserable life.”

Because he was at such a loss for words Zarbon, to his horror, found himself speaking before he could stop himself. “It appears you are too late for that, my Lord.”

Frieza went very still before slowly, ever so slowly, turning his head to the side. Just enough to just catch Zarbon from the corner of his eye. “And… what exactly is that supposed to mean?”

Knowing there was no way out of it now Zarbon said in as firm of a voice as he could manage, “A scout contacted us a few minutes ago. While they can’t be positive… they have found what they believe to be Dodoria’s remains.”

Frieza turned away from him. “Did they?”

“Yes, my Lord.” Zarbon swallowed. “Clearly Dodoria allowed himself to be ambushed.”

“Zarbon, I know that we are having issues with our scouters-“ And oh how Frieza had been angry when he had learned that. Ranted and raved about how, when they needed the scouters the most, they were suddenly having technical glitches. Swore that he would slaughter the entire tech department if not for the fact that he needed them alive to fix the damn things. “-but I do know that we scanned the planet before we arrived and did not detect a single energy reading that could match up to most of our soldiers, let alone Dodoria. So… would you like to come up with some other way he died?”

“Uh… well… perhaps he caused the damage to himself! These Namekians are weak, as you said, and that could cause him to become cocky and believe that he could perform some new move. One that ended up destroying him.”

“What, like he flew into his own energy blast?” Frieza asked condescendingly. “I can see him being that stupid but I don’t think that is the answer at all.”

“You… you don’t, Lord Frieza?”

The Prince turned and began to chuckle, which terrified Zarbon more than his yells and screams. “Of course… the answer is quite obvious and I am disappointed you haven’t realized it. Clearly you were too focused on obtaining the Dragon Balls and not on who else might be seeking them out.”

“I… I don’t understand-“

“Of course you don’t, you empty headed fool. You are more concerned with your bath balms and hair products than actually looking around you and seeing the world for what it is. Or what it holds. No… it wasn’t the Namekians who killed Dodoria.”

Frieza smirked.

“Vegeta has returned.”

“Ve….Vegeta?”

“Yes,” Frieza said. “And he has grown MUCH stronger. I will be curious to learn what caused such growth in him and in such a quick time.” He waved his hand flippantly. Dismissively. As if that very act could send Vegeta flying off the planet, screaming and raving about how no one did that to “The Prince of All Saiyans”. “I’m surprised you didn’t realize it, Zarbon. I would have thought you’d have checked the scans of the atmosphere… the energy reading clearly matched what we have on Vegeta only at a greater level.”

“But… he managed to defeat Dodoria?”

“Yes, that is a curious thing, isn’t it? Clearly whatever happened that caused his injuries also allowed him to grow stronger. I do remember my father mentioning something about that… how Saiyans were the superior warriors because so long as they had a scrap of life in them they would come back stronger. Foolishness, I say, because everyone knows those monkeys are only superior in getting themselves killed!” He laughed at that and Zarbon smiled at the old joke even though he’d never found it funny. The destruction of the Saiyans had been an utter waste and something only Frieza would find delightful.

Zarbon had seen the quarterly reports and in the last 20 or so years their profit projects had failed to achieve the same trajectory that King Cold had managed; something that annoyed Frieza to no end. He had wanted power and wanted it quickly and blamed everyone around him for it not happening. Never mind that he had killed a vast amount of their best planet scourers. Thankfully he had been smart enough to claim that it was an asteroid that he done the deed and not himself; it had taken Zarbon and Dodoria, along with Captain Ginyu and a few trusted others, to talk him out of claiming the destruction as his own.

Frieza had thought it would send a message to all and make them quake in their boots or rally them to him. Everyone wanted to fight for the winner, after all. But they had argued that all it would do is make all of his business partners nervous. After all, did you really want to sign a contract with someone that had proven that they would be willing to destroy you purely because it would amuse them?

‘He has no true understanding of business,’ Zarbon though bitterly, longing for the days when he’d worked with King Cold. He had understood how to do things… he had been out in the field cleansing planets and building up the empire from nothing and thus realized the problems that could arise or the issues that could become stumbling blocks. ‘Prince Frieza… this is the first time he’s actually went to a planet with the rest of us. He has no idea what to expect. He’s utterly green but we can’t even treat him like a new hire!’ It was frustrating to no end and he still didn’t understand why King Cold allowed it. Yes, Frieza was far more feared than his father… but he was also hurting their ability to make a profit, costing them allies, and pushing dangerously close to getting the Galactic Police to actually attempt to deal with them. And Zarbon feared the day Lord Frieza decided to break his father’s rules and go after Lord Beerus or dare to claim a planet that was the Omni-King’s play thing…

“I do wonder why he is doing this. Killing Dodoria… well, that is something that he’s wanted and not that great of a loss. Dodoria had become bothersome of late and it will be easy enough to replace him. I am sure you are personally pleased, Zarbon… in fact, had I not gotten the recording of Vegeta’s energy signature and knew that you were on the ship the entire time I would have assumed YOU did the deed!” He chuckled at that again.

Zarbon didn’t answer. No… no he wouldn’t have done the deed. He loathed Dodoria because he reminded Zarbon far too much of his bestial self but he also saw the warrior’s worth. He was the hammer to Zarbon’s knife and they worked well together. It would be a massive burden to find a replacement.

‘Perhaps one of the Ginyus? Burter might work… he is strong and fast so that would do well to cover for what we lost. No Recoome… he is hammer as well but too immature. He would never handle working for Lord Frieza. I suppose I could also look within the ranks…’

It would be an utter nightmare to find a replacement for Dodoria. Especially one that would appeal to Lord Frieza AND King Cold, for whoever it was would need to take on Dodoria’s roles in the matter of keeping an eye on Frieza. King Cold would not be happy that his eyes and ears had been rendered half blind and half deaf.

‘And then there is the compensation package I will need to deal with,’ Zarbon thought with a bitter sigh. ‘That will hit our profits very hard.’

Everyone thought that the Frieza Force was made up of slaves. Which was utterly foolish if one actually took a moment to ponder it. Slaves made for horrible warriors, for they didn’t fight for you but because of you. A desperate slave would see a fight as a chance to either gain their freedom or to die and be released. And slaves couldn’t be given any freedom and that didn’t work for their business. Soldiers needed to go out and take care of things without constantly being watched. It was why Lord Frieza didn’t deal with the slave trade at all. Too messy. Too complicated.

No… every Frieza Solider was a contracted employee. The contracts tended to be for life, so there was no risk of them taking their secrets to any of the other galactic powers, and were iron clad with an army of lawyers (quite literally… they had their own planet to serve as their office) to ensure that no one dared attempt to break them. Frieza had never really looked into that and thus didn’t understand everything that was in said contracts. When he got mad and demanded soldiers hurry up and take a planet they got overtime pay. When he sent them on long flights instead of looking to see who else might be available that was closer those year long treks cost the Empire travel pay. The bonuses that were paid out for successful missions.

Captain Ginyu and his forces gambled with candy because they had no need for money. Each would be able to, when they hit the retirement age, buy a planet of their very own. Zarbon himself was eying up a nice solar system that would become his when he finally hit the point where he was removed from active duty.

And then there was the life insurance.

King Cold and Prince Cooler NEVER killed their own men. Ever. Would be horrified by doing so. Because every time a soldier died their life insurance would kick in. Many of the Frieza Force members signed their contracts because they knew that their families would be cared for if they died… and cared for well. Some of the greatest fighters they had joined because the pay and the insurance helped their planets out. It was how they got some of the best doctors and scientists to join them.

And should they die because of negligence on the part of the Frieza Force? Like Lord Frieza killing his own men because he was throwing a fit? The amount skyrocketed.

‘Thankfully Lord Frieza wasn’t the one that killed Dodoria,’ Zarbon thought. ‘And if it was Vegeta then it will come out of his own funds. But we’ll need proof of that…’ Coming to a decision Zarbon stepped forward. “I will go and personally see to the matter, my lord. I will retrieve Dodoria’s body and determine if Vegeta was the culprit.”

“Yes, look into Vegeta,” Frieza said with a sniff, turning once more back to the window. “We need to see if this was merely him letting his temper get the better of him or if he has decided to go rogue. If it is the former and he has at least a good reason I suppose I could let him back into the fold. Not to replace Dodoria though… he probably thinks that will be his reward for this. But he failed to check in with us and that must be punished. If he has gone rogue… I want him found and I want him alive. I will personally deal with him.” Frieza paused. “But as for Dodoria’s corpse let it rot. I will not waste time on that failure. Do not forget we are here for the Dragon Balls, Zarbon, and with these technical issues with the scouters that task becomes all the harder.”

Zarbon bowed, not daring to correct Lord Frieza and inform him that Dodoria HAD to be brought back. Yet another thing in his contract that Frieza didn’t know.

‘King Cold would have known,’ he thought darkly. ‘He wouldn’t be treating this so mildly.’ He moved quickly through the halls, teeth grit in frustration. ‘Lord Frieza… he continues to bring us down. And if he manages to get hold of the Dragon Balls… what will stop him from truly turning us all into his slaves?’

No.

No, something had to be done. The course of the Empire corrected.

It was time King Cold returned.

And the only way to do that… was for Zarbon to claim the Dragon Balls for the rightful ruler.

~MC~MC~MC~

“I honestly don’t see why you are still upset,” Treiv said with a laugh, clicking on one of the capsules and rubbing his hands together when, with a poof, it formed into a table with a three course meal on it, all warm and steaming. Roasted chicken, a side of potatoes drenched in gravy, fluffy rolls, and a sweet smelling pie for dessert. “Dr. Oodle stated that the planet is already healing from what Turles did to it and in a season we’ll be able to grow crops again. And we have enough firewood to last us years now… and it burns real well!”

He gestured towards one of the bonfires that had been made by Dober, which was crackling merrily. The wood of the Tree of Might had some very interesting properties. When burned it gave off a scent that seemed to give everyone a bit more vigor, to the point that they actually had to make their camps far away from the blazes because no one would be able to sleep if around them. And food cooked over the flames lasted far longer, with one of the Pleists needing only a mouthful in order to work an entire day. Many of them were interested in trying their hands at using the wood to build new homes, wondering what new magic they might discover with the timbers.

The only one in a foul mood still, at least to Treiv, was Sennen.

“It shouldn’t have even come to this,” she muttered darkly.

“They gave us plenty of food,” Radoor grumped. “And supplies.”

“And they helped us get rid of Turles in the first place,” Dober said.

Sennen shook her head. “That mage though…”

“Oh lay off of him!” Treiv declared with a laugh. “His friends looked ready to neuter him for that prank! I think he’ll be punished enough.”

“Prank?” Sennen snapped. “Prank!? Do you remember-“

“We do remember,” Radoor said coolly. “We remember his promises and then how he stole the fruit and ran. But we have moved on… you should too.”

“You… you want me to move on from this betrayal?” Sennen demanded. “What he did-“

Triev groaned dramatically. “She’s going to ruin supper if she keeps this up!” Still he tore off a piece of chicken and began to hungrily gnaw on it. “Come on… we’re never going to see him again! We are set… let us get the best revenge by leading good lives.”

Sennen’s muzzle twitched at that. “I just wish I could see him one more time-“

And that’s when the solid plane of white appeared before them, roughly the size of a doorway.

The Pleists all went stiff and still at the sudden appearance of the large white rectangle, many of them going for their guns. While they had never been an idle people, having had plenty of wars and fights amongst themselves, after Turles they would never drop their guard again. They would be ready for whatever threat came upon them.

The first to step out had Sennen tensing before she relaxing, chastising herself for being worried. Son Goku was not his uncle, the monster Turles, even if they did resemble each other greatly. But only in the basic shape and Sennen had gotten annoyed at plenty of traders who arrived and confused her for someone else purely because of the shade of her coat (which she honestly didn't get... all of them were the same shade of gray in her eyes). 'Use your damn nose!' she had snapped at more than one before apologizing for being so angry... but still holding it against the other party.

So how was it fair for her to react in such a way to Son Goku?
The Saiyan wasn't his uncle. One only had to look at his face, which was open and kind. She could tell at once he was a good man, noble and helpful, willing to give his all for any that needed his aid. Hadn't he, after all, fought his own blood to protect them? Actions had always spoken louder than words for them all and Son Goku's actions were like a howl across an empty field.

Then there was his scent. Turles had smelled... Wrong. Old blood and rotted wood and stinky fruit. The kind that had been left out and developed a bad mold but you only realized it when you turned it around and saw half of it covered in fluff. The same was true of his men. They had all smelled horrible and it was why, the moment they had seen them, the Pleists had opened fire on them.

Son Goku though? He smelled like a forest glen. Earthy but not dirty. No... Like a hundred different plants and old tree bark and leaves that were no where close to falling. He smelled of fresh running water and the sky on a day where the sun was fair and the clouds held a thousand dreams. Of a fire roasting fresh meat that invited all to gather round.

He was as he had been when he left though Sennen detected something else as she sniffed. 'A storm. Lightning. But it hasn't actually struck the ground yet and the rain hasn't fallen. Its in the air. The current. But it isn't something to fear.' It reminded her of when she'd been a pup and gotten excited for thunderstorms because yes they were big and scary but so were parents and like parents storms could be amazing as well.

"Hey! We're back here!" Son Goku declared happily. "We were wondering about that!"

"What are you doing here?" Dober asked. "I thought you and your friends were going to that planet... Namek?"

"Yeah. Still need to get there. You guys have ships, right? I'd really appreciate it if we could borrow one, as otherwise we have to wait for Bulma and the others to come back here and they might be busy." He rubbed the back of his head. "We were going to leave but then this portal opened up and Kayos was told that he had to help another world-"

"Kayos? Help another world?" Sennen asked with a scoff. "Like he'd-"

Kayos stepped through the portal.

He was dressed differently. A long coat and some goggles and gloves. And the smile he'd worn when he had talked with them... and later betrayed them... wasn't there. Instead his features were stone cold. Showing nothing.

But he couldn't hide his scent.

Sennen breathed in and was startled.

Before he had been of contrasts. The dusk and the dawn. The sun setting and the world falling asleep after a long day meeting the rise of the sun and dew on the grass and the smell of the flowers beginning to open. But now it was... so much stronger.

He was the coldest midnight in the middle of a winter, when the moon was full and the stars were out and everything was blanketed in quiet snow. Where a single sniff hurt ones lungs but was also so delightful that one couldn’t help but suck in more and more. It was the pines standing guard and the crispness of a world where all went to sleep.

But he was also the hottest day of summer, when the sun was so high in the sky that there were no shadows. The baked earth drying and cracking, crumbling with every step. He was the sands forever shifting and moving and threatening to consume all that wandered upon them. He was the harshness and the brightness of it all.

A calmness that hid the death and danger.

Sennen aimed her gun right at him, even as she knew it was a feeble gesture. She could tell at once, though she didn’t understand his magics, that he was far beyond them now.

“You dare show your face after what you did to us?” she demanded. “How you doomed our planet?”

“…yes,” Avo Kayos declared and then he raised his hand and white energy burst from his palm, causing Sennen and the rest of the Pleists all began to whine and whimper at the sight of the raging magic.

But he didn’t attack them.

Avo instead suddenly slammed his hand into the ground and the magic pulsed into the soil… and around him there was a tremble, like when a rock was thrown into a small pond. With him as the epicenter the ground around him roiled for a moment before the thin layer of grass they had been standing on, which had just begun to poke its way through the soil that had been ravaged by the Tree of Might, suddenly exploded into a wild thicket, hearty and hail. It blasted past them, making many of Sennen’s companions yelp in shock as the sensation of grass suddenly tickling their feet. They looked about wildly as young saplings they had been caring for with all the tenderness they could decided to make years pass in seconds, rising into the sky and lifting their branches so that soon they found themselves in a shady forest glen. Animals that they had only seen hints of, which had retreated to regain their strength, let out songs and cries so that the newly grown forest became an orchestra.

Sennen herself slowly lowered her gun, startled at the changes she was feeling. She honestly hadn’t realized how tired she was feeling until that moment but it was like she dined on her first truly filling meal in ages. She felt sated and full and it made her want to rub her belly and smile at the sensation. But she wasn’t lethargic… no. She was full of energy, buzzed and ready to climb any mountain or tackle any great river that might be set before her. She looked at the others and saw that they were feeling much the same as her. The life force that the Tree of Might had stolen from them, that had been slowly returning, was now back in full.

“…why?” she whispered as she stared at Avo Kayos in shock, the man slowly standing up and brushing off his pants. “Why did you do this after… after what you did before?”

“Because someone held me to the mark,” he replied. “I am Avo Kayos. And I save people. And if there anyone out there, anyone that has a problem with that?” He threw back his head and roared to the heavens, “TO HELL WITH THEM!”

Chapter Text

“-sco? Can… hear me? Can-”

The robot suddenly stopped what he was doing, his systems working to try and unscramble the staticy message he was suddenly detecting. It was coming from outer space, he was sure of that, but it wasn’t on any of the frequencies that he had been detecting, and blocking, from the Frieza Force Ships. Other than a single message that had gotten out, so scrambled he hadn’t realized what it was exactly until it was already gone sent, nothing had been allowed to leave or come to the ships in terms of communications. And the message that he was getting, apparently in real time, wasn’t from them either.

“Isco?” Bulma asked, having noticed him still. “What is it? Is it Gohan?”

“No,” he said; everyone was very much on edge with the discovery that Gohan and Dende had disappeared. Elder Sax, along with several older Namekians, were doing all they could to prevent their fellow Namekians from rushing out to find Dende while Chichi and several of the Z Fighters had blasted out of their hiding place in order to search for the children. “I am getting a message… one addressed to me…”

“-Isco, can you hear me?” the message said, far less garbled.

“…sir,” Isco said softly.

“Avo!?!” Bulma exclaimed. “Isco, can you-“

“Yes… yes, one moment. It isn’t the strongest signal so I need to boost it…” He rerouted some power from different devices within himself, his anti-grav engines causing him to drop down a foot as he lowered their strength. But it was worth it when the static completely cleared and he heard Avo Kayos’ voice coming in loud and clear.

“Isco, can you hear me?”

“I can hear you, sir,” Isco replied.

“We can hear you!” Bulma said only a half second later. “Avo… you and Goku-?”

“We’re back,” Avo said.

“yeah!” Goku chimed in. “It was amazing, Bulma! We met other versions of Avo! There was one made of bones and one that had spider powers and another that had this Key! And we fought this one guy who brainwashed the heroes of his world but don’t worry, we saved them. Then we had to fight this guy, Thanos, who wanted to kill half of the universe! Oh, and I learned some new tricks and moves, I can’t wait to show you all! I can now send out my Ki like lightning! Its really fast and I need to work on aiming it a bit better but it is going to be a big help! And Kayos learned how to do some really neat things too! He did Black Parade but it was all of us and they-“

“Goku,” Bulma said, cutting him off, “that’s really interesting but we are kind of more concerned about what is going on here. I mean, no offense as I’m sure what you went through was really bad but we are having some issues.”

“What kind of issues?” Avo asked.

Isco quickly muted the mic on their end. “Might I suggest NOT informing them about young Gohan? I dare say it might cause a panic for the both of them.”

“Right, good idea.”

“Well,” Isco said, returning to the conversation, “the Lord Frieza you were worried about decided to make his presence known.”

“Crap,” Avo muttered. “How bad, Isco?”

“In terms of actual damage we are all safe. And we have managed to gather many of the Namekians and from several villages and get them to our location.”

“We’re working on digging out some caves to hunker down in,” Bulma stated. “Blasting into the ground… we are finding some hollow spots to work with so that is a huge plus.” Left unsaid was that they had been forced to greatly slow down with the Z Warriors having gone to search for Gohan, along with several Namekian elders. “But Frieza is here and so is Vegeta. We also lost some Namekian Warriors when they went to attack Frieza.”

Elder Sax had been very saddened by the news that Larin had snuck off, gathering warriors and convincing them to disobey his orders. Especially with the deaths of several of them. It was a shameful act that had led to shameful waste and the older Namekian had merely sighed and murmured that he didn’t know what would happen with Larin when he returned.

If… was a better word choice in Isco’s opinion.

“Man, we really need to get there, then!” Goku declared. “Good thing the Pleits let us borrow this ship!”

“You have a ship?” Isco said. “And the Pleits… sir, last time we saw them they weren’t that happy with you…” He paused. “Did you… actually borrow the ship?”

“If you are asking if I stole it and lied to Goku then no, Isco, I did not do that,” Kayos said dryly but there was enough mirth to make it clear he wasn’t angry at the assumption. “I made things right with them. Like Goku said I learned a few things fighting Thanos and I also got a real nice power boost… not for sure why I didn’t go haywire when I saved that world, maybe it was Entropy’s doing that kept it in check, might have been NONE.”

“He’s an Avo made of bones!” Goku chimed in.

“Long story,” Avo said. “Point is I was able to repay the Pleits and now we’re on good terms. So we can fly out and meet up with you guys.”

“Kayos,” Bulma said, a bit nervous, “we aren’t exactly that close. It took a week for us to get to Namek… and you don’t have the guidance system to direct you. And they have several ships in orbit too… they didn’t all land and I bet they aren’t going to let you just arrive and pass them by.”

Left unsaid was the worry that even if they did know exactly where they were going there was little hope they could get to Namek in time. It honestly amazed Isco how quickly things were spiraling from where they had started. Only a few hours ago they had been meeting with the Namekian villagers, their biggest worry being them running off scared or getting defensive at the sight of strangers. Now they had Frieza breathing down their neck, were working on plans to protect the population, and had Gohan missing. In a week’s time there was no telling what exactly would happen… it was very likely that things wouldn’t make it a day or two, let alone a week.

People wondered why Isco liked to avoid danger at all costs. This was why. Danger was fast. It came at you hard and quick before you could put in plans for your survival. And there were no back ups often… no chances to hit an Undo button. That was just… that.

He didn’t know how organics could stand it.

“Oh, we’ll be there in a few hours,” Avo said with a cheerfulness that was also coated with dark determination. “We’d be there far sooner but we’ll have to arrive at the system instead of the planet and sneak around the Frieza Force ships.”

“…sir, is this some magical bullshit?” Isco said.

Avo snickered. “Very much so. Like I said, I’ve learned a few tricks… and I don’t know if Edwin managed to get a souvenir from our visit to that Earth but I did.”

“Its called a Sling Ring!” Goku declared. “It allows the wearer to go to other places!”

“I could try and arrive right on the planet but I don’t know if Frieza and his forces would detect that,” Avo said. “So we’ll go the long way but be there in a few hours.”

Bulma sagged in relief at that. “Good… that’s very… that’s very good. We… we really need you two here. Krillin is doing his best to lead but with how everything is spiraling I will feel better if you two are here to help. And I know he will too.”

“Well don’t worry!” Goku declared. “We’re going to be there very soon!”

With that the transmission cut off and Isco and Bulma shared a look.

“Do you think they’ll get here in time?” she asked softly.

“Yes,” Isco said firmly. “I do believe they will arrive here in time before we face utter destruction. My only concern is how far things fall apart before they do.”

“I was afraid you’d say that,” Bulma muttered.

~MC~MC~MC~

Vegeta knew he needed to keep moving.

He knew he had to hurry and take flight and continue on with the hunt for the Dragon Balls. Now was not the time to doddle. To waste precious seconds being idle. He needed to get going.

But still… he found himself standing there, savoring his victory.

He hadn’t been foolish enough to remain where he had defeated Dodoria. No, he had known that the moment he had killed that big ball of pink gunk that he needed to move. Every scouter, amongst the many features designed to keep tabs on the Frieza Force, had a dead man’s switch built into it. Something that would alert Frieza if a soldier was killed. Or rather someone in the Force as he doubted very much that Freiza himself was sitting at a desk watching as information came in about battles.

‘Though perhaps, considering that Dodoria was one of his top lieutenants?’ he thought to himself as he sat under a rocky outcrop. He had pulled out some of his emergency rations, eating a rather tasteless energy bar and drinking down some water that was warm on his tongue.

But… after his victory against Dodoria… it tested like the finest meal he’d ever had. No banquet had ever been more pleasing than the meal he had at that moment, sated and pleased after a victory against such a hated and powerful foe.

‘I’ve grown stronger,’ he thought to himself. ‘My defeat on Earth… I knew that such things could allow a Saiyan to rapidly gain in strength but I never imaged it would be this much.’ He swallowed another bite of the power bar, feeling it settle heavy in his stomach. For as bland and tasteless as they were they did do a decent enough job to make one fill full, though they never truly felt satisfied. ‘Dodoria was always such a smug bastard, throwing his weight around and believing that he was the greatest in the universe. Mocking and arrogant. I wonder how much he is bragging in whatever Hell he finds himself in now.’ He let out a huff at that, chuckling darkly as a smirk played along his lips. ‘He always thought I was meaningless… a child playing at being powerful. But do you think that still, Dodoria? Or did my might finally teach you that lesson right before you end?’

Most likely not, he realized. Knowing Dodoria he probably was in Hell at that very moment trying to come up with any reason, any at all, for why he was defeated that didn’t involve him having to admit that Vegeta was stronger than him.

‘Even my father never dared dream testing himself against Dodoria,’ Vegeta thought. ‘And I killed him with ease.’

His mind went to the plans he had detailed to Nappa and Raditz. How they would overthrow Frieza and create a new Saiyan Empire with Vegeta at the top. He had never admitted, even to himself, his doubts that they’d be able to pull it off. They would have to be cunning about taking on Frieza and the members of his inner circle, picking them off quietly but also as fast as they could. They couldn’t risk Frieza finding out… if he did he would bring his full might to bear against them and then they would be done. He had known that the chances for success were slim but he had been willing to try, unable to stand a second more under Frieza’s foot.

‘But now… now I could kill the bastard easily!’ he thought in delight, clenching his hand into a fist. ‘Dodoria and Zarbon are roughly the same level of power. Even if Zarbon is slightly stronger than him the way I managed to take out Dodoria… well, Zarbon wouldn’t stand a chance. And Frieza… for all his claims of strength, I have never seen him fight. Never seen him perform a single attack. It is entirely likely he doesn’t even have any moves. That he has relied upon the legacy of King Cold in order to maintain power.’

King Cold… that was a tricky situation and one that required quite a bit of thought. While Vegeta was coming to the realization that Frieza wouldn’t be as difficult has he’d thought to overthrow, what with Vegeta’s increase in power, King Cold still remained and he KNEW he could fight. He had seen the grainy footage of him delighting in crushing his foes, reducing them to a red paste with just his bare hands. And despite his disappearance Vegeta was convinced that he still kept tabs on his son and if he were to die he would take that as an affront.

‘But this planet… it might be the best way to deal with Frieza,’ Vegeta thought to himself, a plan beginning to form in his mind. ‘I had considered using this planet as the new homeworld for the Saiyan Empire… but perhaps, once I have claimed my wishes, I can use it as a distraction. Allow King Cold to rush here to find the mangled corpse of his precious little prince… and take his wrath out on the Namekians that live here. Once he has slaughtered them all he will believe that his vengeance as been satisfied and return to whatever backwater part of the galaxy he’s decided to retire to. Never realizing that I am still out there, the Slayer of Frieza, gathering my strength until it is time for me to reveal myself to the world.’

Vegeta was pleased with that. Very pleased. Not only would his little plan allow him to gather his strength but it would be a chance to bring King Cold down low. To embarrass him in the eyes of the galaxy.

‘It all fell apart for my race the moment King Cold turned his sights upon us,’ Vegeta thought darkly, his good mood fading away as he remembered the well known tales of the fall of the Saiyan Race. ‘We might have died out when our planet was destroyed but we were a fallen race long before that.’

Though he had obviously hadn’t been there that day, for not even his father’s father had been born, he had heard the tale plenty of times. Frieza had delighted in telling him of that day; and several other members of the Frieza Force, old timers who had been around centuries and made their money keeping seats warm and shuffling paperwork because their days of fighting were long past, had told him similar tales. And Nappa himself had told him once, and only once when Vegeta had pushed the issue, of what had happened…

~Many Years Ago…~

“Sire,” the scout said hurriedly, rushing to where King Parsnip was lounging in his chair. It wasn’t as nice as the Great Throne of Vegeta but considering that had been carved directly out of the remains of a mountain that King Onin the Great had destroyed to prove his strength to The Horde Of 17 bringing such a seat would have been difficult. So he had been forced to make do with one of wood, carved in the form of some avian-like beast; Parsnip honestly didn’t know what the creature was and any of the people that might have known were long dead, slaughtered by the Saiyans when they had refused to show them the respect they deserved. Their cities were now long overgrown, with Parnsip and his war caravan using them as a hunting ground to test themselves.

That’s why they had come to the planet they were currently on. The King had deserved a new hunt, something different from what he was used to, and had selected this planet to have some entertainment. Soon the moon would be rising and he and his war caravan would rampage to their hearts’ delight, unleashing all their pent up rage and aggression. That was the problem with trying to make a kingdom built around beings who thrilled at violence and destruction: they needed someplace to cut loose and let such things out that wouldn’t leave the kingdom in ruin.

Thus everyone in King Parsnip’s tent were a bit on edge, eager to begin the evening’s festivities but knowing they needed to wait a bit longer. Parsnip had commanded that there were to be no fights until he gave the word, claiming it was because he didn’t want to deal with someone causing a mess and thus eating away at the time the rest of them had to cut loose. In reality, though none of them said the words, they all knew the real reason was that he just wanted the power trip of being able to give the command himself. It was a poorly guarded secret but none dared speak up about it, not wanting to anger the king.

Thus everyone was tense and ready to leap out of the tent and begin firing and blasting anything they could find. To destroy and shatter the planet until morning came. And when the sun did rise they would all walk about the desolation and point out what each had contributed and brag about the destruction they had caused. They would then find the biggest crater or most ruined mountain range and they would call upon the supply ships to bring down a feast, where the Saiyans would eat and drink to their hearts’ content before, finally, returning home to Planet Vegeta sated and content. It would probably be the most peaceful time that the planet had had in years, with all of their pent up rage and aggression driven away. He had ordered his subjects to scatter to the other barren hunting grounds in the system for the exact same reason. All would return with their minds clear and an ability to actually focus.

It wouldn’t last, of course. It never did. But it would be good enough to buy them some time to actually work together on a few projects. They needed to work on changing the course of the great Maize River and the Tuffles had been causing some problems recently that needed to be addressed. And the restocking of the hunting planets… while it would be easier to just take over new planets sometimes it was better to bring in new species for the Saiyans to hunt, because it meant less travel.

But having a scout come running in out of breath and begging to see him meant that King Parsnip had to put such thoughts on hold.

“What is it?” the king said, slowly rising from his throne, running his fingers through his long black hair. It hung down to the small of his back, splitting right down the middle so that it appeared that he had two massive pony tails. He had gone without the traditional armor of the Saiyans, much like the rest of his hunting caravan, for he had no desire to waste time when the moment arrived for them to become the mighty Oozarus removing the breastplate and gauntlets and such. The only piece of the outfit he did wear was the body suit and the long cape, as well as his boots and gloves which he would quickly toss aside.

“There… there is someone… the planet isn’t void of intelligent life!” the scout said.

“You found another species here?” Parsnip asked.

“Impossible!” Councilor Okra snapped; he was an older Saiyan with a long droopy mustache and hair flecked with gray. “We know this planet hasn’t had any intelligent life! We investigated it carefully before we arrived… just must have made a grave mistake!”

“Probably saw a pissbeetle and thought it was smart!” someone said with a laugh, which set off the rest of the hunting caravan.

“It doesn’t have native sentient life,” the scout said before hurriedly adding when it became clear that the King was NOT happy with being interrupted for something that didn’t actually exist. “But there is another species here… they claim they already conqueror the planet and that we are trespassing. They demand we leave at once…” He swallowed, “…and they might allow us to escape with only the bare minimum of restitutions.”

“Restitutions?” King Parsnip asked before bursting into laughter, the rest of his hunting caravan joining him. “They ask for restitutions? For what… doing what comes nature to a Saiyan? Should we give them food and drink because we breathed?” He looked at his councilors who nodded in agreement. “Who are these fools that dare speak of such things when it comes to us?”

“That… would be me.”

King Parsnip suddenly turned towards the opposite side of his tent only to realize that he was looking far too low; he was staring right into the muscular stomach of the speaker. His skin was purple without an ounce of fat upon him, only hard muscle that made several of his councilors, who had allowed themselves to go to seed recently thanks to claiming several planets with rich fatty beasts, shift and swallow nervously. He was wearing only a pair of tight trunks, showing off to all his powerful limbs. Slowly panning his head up Parsnip found himself looking into the bemused eyes of the new arrival, his gaze at once regal and savage. This was a man much like himself, able to destroy all in his path while still maintaining a noble bearing. His head was topped with a bone-like helm that Parsnip couldn’t decide was actually a part of his skull or not and a pair of huge black horns.

“Imagine my surprise as I finished taking my laps through the Great Cold Sea to find this one-“ he gestured at the scout, “-waiting for me at the shore with the most startled look on his face. He was rather kind enough to tell me all about you and I bid him to deliver my message to you. I don’t doubt for a second that he actually did so… meaning you have chosen to disregard what I desired. How… amusing.” He smiled at that, hard and fierce.

But King Parsnip refused to back down despite the new arrival’s size and mass. After all, he had faced far worse. “I don’t know who you think you are but I am Parsnip, King of All Saiyans, and I have claimed to world for me and mine. Any claim that came before that no longer matters and any claim made afterwards is a death sentence.”

“Oh my,” the new arrival said with faux surprise and awe, which only served to grate on his nerves even more. He pressed his hand to his chest. “Those are bold words to speak to someone you’ve only just met.”

“And I mean then,” King Parsnip declared darkly. The moon was quickly rising and soon he would be able to destroy the pathetic man before him. “I am a veteran of a thousand battles. I have slaughtered tens of thousands. I control dozens of planets. And when the moon fully rises I will unleash a power that you can not even begin to understand.”

“Is that so?” the new arrival said before, without even looking up, he raised his hand and fired a single beam of blue energy that flashed through the sky before striking the raising moon. Parsnip felt the first stirrings of the power of the Mighty Oozaru within his veins as he caught sight of the moon… just before it exploded into a thousand chunks.

At once all the bravado he’d been feeling disappeared completely.

“How disgraceful of me!” the new arrival said before suddenly rushing forward, wrapping his massive hand around Parsnip’s face, fingers curling around his skull as he lifted the Saiyan into the air. “I failed to introduce myself. That was so rude of me.” Several of the hunting caravan members moved to attack him only for the new arrival to stare them down, causing them to meekly back away from him as they saw their long, painful deaths shadowed in his eyes. “I… am King Cold. I am the veteran of over 13,453 campaigns. By my own hand or by my command, billions have died who did not bend their knees to me. I have conqueror over a thousand planets. And I don’t need some moon to prove my power.”

And with that he slammed Parsnip into the ground so hard that the Saiyan’s body curled into a ball, bones shattering along with the rocky ground under their feet. King Cold released Parsnip and smirked as he saw he was still alive.

“You…” he said, pointing to the scout. “You are the King of the Saiyans now.”

“I… yes, sire,” the scout wisely said, bowing his head, the rest of the caravan dipping their heads in acceptance.

“And I am now the Lord and Master of the Saiyans. What I say… you do. Serve me well and I will provide you all you desire. Ever think of displeasing me…” he stomped down on Parsnip’s arm, the former king screaming in agony. “What is your planet’s name?”

“V…Vegeta, my lord.”

“Then you are now King Vegeta the First. I don’t want to bother trying to learn a new name, so tedious.” He looked at the gathered Saiyans before chuckling, clapping his hands together. “Now then… I believe you need to get back to your planet and let them know about the change in management.”

Okra spoke up. “What… what of K… I mean… what of Parsnip?”

“Oh… I will be taking him back with me. He really needs to learn some manners.” With that he hauled the broken Saiyan up, the once proud king whimpering in pain as the mere jostling of his bones. “Now hurry along… I promise I will be around soon to speak with you all…”

And he was. Within a month King Cold arrived and explained just what was expected of the Saiyan Race. How they would serve the Cold Force.

Parsnip… was never seen again.

~Present Day~

‘The first time Frieza told me that story I called him a liar,’ Vegeta thought darkly. ‘He didn’t even have the decency to get mad at me. Instead he laughed. He laughed.’ He could still hear Frieza’s chortles as Vegeta, young and brash and full of determination to prove himself to all, had screamed that the Prince was lying. ‘He merely laughed and then told the others to tell me the truth.’ Negi and Kabocha had both attempted to explain to him that what Frieza had said was the truth. That it was known to all Saiyans that his lineage was not traced back to a great warrior but a scout who had bowed when he had seen the might of King Cold. Vegeta’s wrath at that had been so great that the wounds he had given the two had never truly healed, leading to their deaths only a year or so later.

Nappa had been the one to finally get him to calm down and listen. He had explained that yes, his family had started out with just a scout. But King Vegeta the First had still proven himself one of the greatest warriors of the Saiyan Race. That he had killed 10 warlords who had thought they could rebel against the ‘False King’ in a single night and then went on to led an assault against the Fotos, slaying their Emperor, Kodak, all by himself. The might of the House of Vegeta had only grown. That Vegeta’s own father had argued that it showed they were more than powerful fighters but brilliant tacticians that had understood it better to submit to King Cold than to die a needless death.

But Vegeta had only remembered Frieza’s laughter.

‘Not that he let me forget it,’ Vegeta thought. “He brought up that story often, until I could repeat it myself. And then he made me do it.’ He curled his fingers into a fist. ‘That is when I began to learn about HIS past… and the Legend of the Super Saiyan.’

He thought back to that time, when he had been consumed with trying to first prove everyone wrong and then, when the few history books he’d been able to find that detailed the Saiyans had agreed with Frieza and Nappa’s tale (written, of course, on order of Frieza himself, most likely just to aggravate Vegeta), he had begun digging into Frieza and his lineage, wishing to discover something even more embarrassing about him and those that had come before. He hadn’t known WHAT he would do with such info and he had realized as he had grown older that revealing a truly devastating secret would have most likely resulted in Frieza slaughtering him on the spot. But he had searched all the same and that’s when he’d found it.

‘Lord Chilled. The last of Frieza’s kin that died not from old age or killed by one of their own kind. His last words to his men were of the danger of the Super Saiyan. Back then no one had known what a Saiyan even was and most likely, when Cold found us, he hadn’t learned of his ancestor’s warning. But Lord Chilled had been slaughtered by the Super Saiyan, the damage so great that he had been terrified by the mere thought of another Super Saiyan coming upon any of his line.’ Vegeta looked down at his hands, curling his fingers closed and then opening them again. ‘Is that what I have become? Is that how I was able to so easily defeat Dodoria after my humiliation on Earth?’

It didn’t feel right.

‘I always assumed that to become a Super Saiyan required some mystical ritual bullshit. That I would need to gather… a bunch of Saiyans and have them concentrate on me and that would give me powers far beyond a regular Saiyans. Ones that were willing to help me because they wished to help me, for no other reason. That’s how so many other prophecies always went. Its why I allowed Raditz and Nappa to remain around. To merely gain the power because of a quirk of my Saiyan makeup…’ He looked down at his hand once more. ‘But… doesn’t that also make sense? That to become a Super Saiyan I must become the ultimate Saiyan? The greatest of them? Not just those alive but whoever lived?’

He was more powerful than his father. More powerful than any Saiyan that had come before. He could feel it! So… perhaps he had become the Legend. Perhaps… he was the legendary Super Saiyan!

And if that was the case… what should he do next?

Slaughtering Frieza was always in the cards. There was no question about that. But… what after that? Make his wish, yes. To recreate the Saiyan race in his image. That was-

“Gohan!”

Vegeta frowned, suddenly looking up.

“The female,” he whispered in shock as he saw flying through the sky the female Saiyan from Earth. “The female… she’s here… how is she here?” He narrowed his eyes in anger. “Raditz and Kakarot… they must be on this planet as well!” But then his eyes went wide in horror. “Frieza…”

What would Frieza do if he learned there was a living female Saiyan? He feared the Saiyans… so the risk of them being able to reproduce? To create more of their kind and, perhaps, be able to build up their strength once again? Vegeta knew that he was carefully watched whenever he went to one of Frieza’s pleasure planets… Frieza wanted to make sure he didn’t produce an heir with some whore, ignoring the fact that Vegeta would never debase himself like that. But a female Saiyan…

The ground under his cracked and buckled as Vegeta launched himself into the sky.

~MC~MC~MC~

“Gohan!” Chichi cried out as she scanned the landscape.

She knew she was being ridiculous. And dangerous. Insanely, insanely dangerous.

‘Frieza and his forces are out here right now and I am screaming my head off and doing nothing to hide myself! They could catch me at any moment and then what would I do? I’ve only gotten back into fighting shape… even with the increase in power I gained after Slug I know that I am no match for many of Frieza’s elite soldiers, not on my own. What good will I be to Gohan if I get myself killed?’

Chichi knew what she should do: quietly return to the hiding spot they had created and work with the other Z Fighters to figure out a way to better track Gohan down. Perhaps get the Namekians to help, for they knew the planet far better than she did and would know where to look, especially if he was traveling with that young Namekian, Dende. Send out, like Krillin had suggested when they needed to warn the villages, those with the weakest power levels or who could hide their power levels, so that they could quietly fly out and find Gohan and get him back. Assuming they even needed to do that, since the scouters should be down; if that was the case then those that were sneaky and cunning would be able to quietly find Gohan and bring him back. All without screaming his name and drawing attention to themselves.

She knew what she should be doing.

“Gohan!”

But Chichi was a mother. A mother whose son was lost and in danger. And that fear… that trumped everything else. Logic. Sanity even. Her safety… and yes, even her life. If her screaming for Gohan allowed him to escape but at the cost of her life… she would bellow until all the Heavens rang.

‘I have to find him. I have to bring him back. I-‘

“WHAT ARE YOU DOING, WOMAN!”

Chichi came to a rapid stop, practically hearing the screeching of tires even though that shouldn’t have been logically possible. She came to a stop, eyes wide as she stared at the fuming form of Vegeta.

“I-“

“Do you realize who is on this planet?!?!” Vegeta roared, flinging his arms out wide. “Frieza! That tyrant is on this planet right now and you are flying about screaming your head off!?! What are you thinking!?”

So startled was she by Vegeta’s appearance… and the fact that he wasn’t attacking her but instead apparently worried about her SAFETY… that all she could do was get out, “Gohan-“

“I don’t know who this Gohan is but you can find your little pet later! You need to find a place to hide, right now! Even with your power-“ And with those words he looked her up and down, making Chichi feel very subconscious; it wasn’t lecherous or the like, as she was well used to that with Roshi. If Vegeta had decided to stare at her like she was a piece of meat she would have known exactly what to do: his head would have spun 360 degrees from the force of the slap she would have given him. But that wasn’t the way he was looking at her. No… he was looking at her approval. And she had no idea how to handle that. “-you are no match for Frieza! You don’t have the training I have, woman!”

“My name is not ‘woman’,” she snapped. “It is Chichi. And-“

“Chichi? What kind of name is that?” Vegeta huffed.

“It is MY name!”

“That is not a proper Saiyan name!” Vegeta argued. “Whoever gave you that name dishonored you greatly and if you chose it yourself then you need to learn to have some pride… true Saiyan pride!”

“My MOTHER gave me that name,” Chichi retorted. “A Saiyan, just like you.”

“Hmmmpf,” he said with a huff, shaking his head. “Then she was a fool.”

“Don’t you dare talk about my mother like that!”

“I will talk about her however I want when she mocks the Saiyan race by giving a strong, confident, beautiful Saiyan female such a pathetic name as ‘Chichi’.” He shook his head in disgust and Chichi felt her eye twitch. “Now come on, woman!”

“My name is Chichi and I’m not going anywhere with you!” she snapped. “I need to find Gohan!”

“You can find your little pet later!”

“He is not a pet!” Chichi roared. “He is my son!”

“Your son?” Vegeta asked and Chichi suddenly felt her blood chill.

She remembered well Vegeta’s words, how he desired her and wanted her for himself. How… how would he react to Gohan? Would he see him as a threat? Something that must be destroyed? She remembered learning from her tutors that when a new male lion took over a pride he would slaughter all the cubs so that the females would go into heat. They would not raise another male’s children. Would Vegeta do the same? Would he now hunt down Gohan?

‘I’ll kill him,’ she thought. ‘If he dares-‘

“You… have a son?” he asked again before he threw his arms out once more. “AND YOU NAMED HIM GOHAN!?! WHERE IS YOUR PRIDE?!”

“THAT’S WHAT YOU’RE FOCUSED ON?!?!” Chichi bellowed. “I AM TRYING TO FIND HIM! I WOULD HAVE FOUND HIM IF YOU HADN’T INTERUPTED ME!”

“YOU WOULDN’T NEED TO FIND HIM IF YOU HADN’T LET HIM WANDER OFF!”

“I didn’t let him wander off!” Chichi screamed.

“You didn’t stop him from going off! I just told you that Frieza is on this planet! What do you think he will do if he finds a Saiyan child all on his own!?”

“That’s why I’m trying to find him!”

Vegeta just shook his head. “Well, you doing a wonderful job of that! Screaming and hollering and making as much noise as possible! It’s a wonder that Frieza hasn’t shown up already to ask about your son and his stupid name!”

“Stop saying his name is stupid!”

“I’ll say its stupid because it is stupid!”

“I frankly think all three of those names are stupid, Vegeta.”

Vegeta suddenly went still and Chichi and him turned as one, staring at the new arrival.

“Now tell me,” the green skinned alien, wearing armor similar to what Vegeta and Nappa had worn when they arrived on earth, asked as he flicked his hair with his fingers, “who is your little friend, Vegeta?”

Chapter Text

“Well well, Vegeta… what do we have here?”