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Chapter Text

A few minutes ago, I was certain I had misheard the message the Lannister soldier had just brought me, because it could not possibly be true that Brienne of Tarth was here, in Riverrun. That she came to speak with me. Hundreds of different thoughts stormed my mind at once. What the hell is she even doing here? Has she found the Stark girl? Does she need something from me? Is she hurt?

Turns out it was indeed very true, so now I stand inside my tent, staring at her sapphire blue eyes while thinking about the promise I just made. To take Riverrun without bloodshed.

“I need your word.”

I know that Brienne truly trusts me and my honor. I know there is honor in you. I’ve seen it myself, she had said just mere moments ago. Yet it feels strange, almost wrong, to hear it. It has been years since someone asked for my word, let alone believe in it. A Kingslayer’s word is worth nothing. So I am grateful for her small reminders about the sincere faith she still holds in me.

“If I persuade him to abandon the castle, you’ll grant his safe passage North.” Oh, if Cersei was here… But she isn’t. Something forces me to try to be a good and honorable man when I’m around Brienne. So I do.

“You have my word. You have until nightfall.” I nod while I stare at her again.

She nods as well and starts to undo her sword belt. I immediately understand what she’s trying to do. She hands the Valyrian steel sword I gave to her, Oathkeeper. I come closer, looking at the sword.

“You gave it to me for a purpose. I’ve achieved that purpose.” 

I remember it so vividly it feels like time hasn’t passed. But the truth is it happened a long time ago. I remember standing there watching her ride away. I remember the urge I had for a fleeting moment to jump on a horse and follow her, just because I couldn’t stand the thought of her getting hurt on her journey and me not being there to save her again, even though I knew she is capable of taking care of herself just fine without me. When we said goodbye that day, I believed I would never see her again. And yet, here she is. The same big blue eyes staring at me as fiercely as the first time. I cannot take that sword back.

“It’s yours.” I say softly, tearing my eyes off the sword and putting them on her again. “It will always be yours.” I say it so softly that it actually feels like I’m not talking about the goddamn sword anymore, but about my heart. And maybe I am.

Her face turns into a look of mild surprise, like she really thought it was a loan and not a gift. Her eyes meet mine and then she ties Oathkeeper back to her waist, where it belongs. She begins to walk out of the tent without saying anything else and I follow. I am not ready to say goodbye once more.

“One last thing, Ser Jaime.” She suddenly turns back, and I halt in my steps feeling a flicker of relief. Don’t leave yet.

“Yes, Lady Brienne?”

“Should I fail to persuade the Blackfish to surrender, and if you attack the castle, honor compels me to fight for Sansa’s kin.”

Oh, fuck honor. But I cannot say those words to the most honorable person I have ever met, and probably ever will. So, instead, I say “Of course it does.” I can guess what she’s going to say next, so I stare at her face for as long as I can trying to keep every single detail of her in my memory, in case this truly is the last time I ever see her.

“To fight you.” I can feel her big blue eyes on me, and I stay silent for a few seconds. I really don’t want to fight her. I try not to let it show on my face that the mere thought of her not being safe terrifies me. If that situation ever came, I am certain I could never bring myself to harm her.

“Let’s hope it doesn’t come to that.” My voice comes out more as a whisper than I had intended it to, the words strained on my throat. I try to regain my composure. Her bottom lip quivers ever so slightly, but enough for me to notice. We stare at each other for a few seconds that stretch into what feels like minutes, until she walks out of the tent without turning back this time. And I can’t help but stay here, watching her leave again.

Chapter Text

I stand on top of the outer wall. A Lannister guard enters and approaches me.

“We found the Blackfish, my lord.”

“Good. Bring him to me.” Safe passage North. I gave Brienne my word.

“He died fighting, my lord.”

I nod to him and he walks away. The Blackfish died fighting. Stubborn old goat. I cannot help but feel like I have failed Brienne. What if she has been hurt as well? My heart quickens at the thought as I stare out at the river. And it stops abruptly when I spot her. It’s plain dark, but I would recognize that silhouette pretty much anywhere. Brienne of Tarth rowing away, in the company of her squire Podrick. Safe. Alive.

I could easily call for someone to go after them. They would probably catch them effortlessly. She’s a bit of a slow rower, as I know from experience. She had rowed a boat with me on it once, when she was still nothing more than my captor and when I still had two hands. A wave of nostalgia washes over me.

I look around to ensure no one else is watching, then let out a small sigh of relief. My heart steadies as soon as I see her looking over her shoulder. Then she notices me. I raise my golden hand and give a weak wave, as I can think of nothing better, and she waves back. She turns around and I stay here, on top of the wall, watching her leave once again. All I can think about is her safety. And if I will ever see those sapphire blue eyes close to mine again.

Forget about the goddamn sword. There’s no doubt. It’s hers. It will always be hers.