Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

“Looks like we’re done here for the day,” Tech said with a satisfied look on his face. Today was a good day, better than most days.

Rev and Tech had just finished a mission together, taking down a villain that had wanted to rob a bunch of stores and terrorize the city. The others had to respond to another emergency on the other side of Acmetropolis.

Rev nodded, dusting off his hands. “Today was as easy as pie, though-pie-isn’t-really-easy-to-make-but-it-depends-on-method-and-ingredients-“

Tech only let out a sigh, knowing that Rev was gonna go on one of his speedy rambles. After a while, he shut the bird’s beak with his hand. Rev stopped talking immediately, his shoulders sagged a bit. He had an annoyed look on his face, but took the hint.

The coyote let go of Rev’s beak and crossed his arms over his chest. Tech looked around to see the possible damage done to the property around them. There wasn’t much, save for one specific building.

Tech wasn’t sure how the villain managed to get a pulse emitting ray gun but he had hit Rev, sending him flying into the warehouse nearby. There was now a Rev-sized hole through the wooden wall of the warehouse.

“Hey Rev, how are you holding up? That guy really got you good,” Tech said with a hint of amusement. He had felt concerned for his friend when he had been sent flying into the warehouse. But the roadrunner just bounced back and sped right into the action.

Rev chuckled, rolling his shoulder a bit. To say that it didn’t hurt would have been a lie. “I’m alright. I was kinda expecting you to take the hit, knowing your luck and all.”

Tech rolled his eyes, a bit annoyed at the mention of his luck. He always ended up in situations that caused him a lot of pain. But that bad luck was always countered by his quick regeneration. It was pretty useful due to his apparent accident-prone nature.

“Let’s hope you didn’t break anything besides the wall. The mayor’s probably still mad about the whole park statue fiasco from last week,” Tech said as he made his way over to the warehouse.

“To be fair, it wasn’t my fault Ace lasered it on accident,” Rev quipped.

“I never said it was.”

They walked over and entered the warehosue through the door. The two inspected the interior, finding nothing unusual aside from the hole.

“Alright, where did you land?” Tech asked.

Rev looked around, trying to recall where he had crashed into. He saw the pile of boxes and wooden crates. “Riiighhhtttt there,” he said before he sped off toward it, leaving a fiery blur behind him.

He looked at the boxes, some of them crumbled up from the impact. Luckily, the wooden crates were sturdier.

“See? Perfectly fine~” Rev said as he picked a crate up and inspected it.

“Uh huh, totally fine,” Tech looked around at the pile Rev was standing by.

“Yeah everything’s fine. The boxes, the crates, even the strange floor hatch-“

Tech’s eyes widened at the last part. “I’m sorry- a floor hatch?”

“Yeah, the-“ Rev paused when he realized what he had said. He looked down at the spot where he had lifted the crate up from. He had noticed the floor hatch but hadn’t actually processed that it was there.

“This must be for access to plumbing or wires,” Tech theorized.

Rev shrugged, setting down the crate in his hands on the floor beside the hatch. Despite Tech’s likely theory, Rev couldn’t help but be a bit curious. But before he could say anything, Tech interrupted him.

“Rev, no.”

“What? I didn’t even say anything-“

“I know what you’re thinking. Leave it alone, birdbrain.”

“Ugh, fine,” Rev pouted.

Tech narrowed his eyes slightly at the roadrunner before turning around to walk away. Rev waited a few moments before he speedily unlocked the hatch.

“Rev!” Tech turned around and growled, knowing the roadrunner’s plan.

“What?! Can’t hear you over the sound of this hatch opening!” Rev said loudly before he opened the hatch and dove inside.

“Rev!” Tech shouted as he ran toward the hatch without missing a beat. He jumped in, finding that it was quite dark and seemingly deep down there.

Tech landed on the ground safely, activating his night vision to see what was around him. The underground level was a dark corridor that seemed to go on forever. Tech saw that Rev was waiting for him.

“Rev…” Tech growled, unhappy that the roadrunner had done the exact opposite of what he had said.

Rev had a cheeky grin on his face. “Oh hey Tech! Glad you could make it. What do you think is in this place? Extra storage-government spyware-alien dissection chamber-“

“Maybe… it’s just for access to the plumbing or electric system. Nothing crazy like what you just said…” Tech groaned in annoyance.

Despite Tech’s protests, him and Rev still walked through the long corridor. Tech hated to admit it but he was curious as to what was inside of here…

Rev quickly used his super speed to run through the corridor, only to stop at a door at the very end.

“Ooohhh, wonder what this is~” Rev grabbed the doorknob and yanked the door open in a dramatic way.

“Rev don’t-“ Tech said far too late.

But Rev didn’t go in, he just stood there in mild confusion.

“Rev?” Tech tilted his head a bit as he noticed the roadrunner’s delayed trespassing of the room.

Tech caught up to Rev and peered into the room. There was what looked like a labratory inside. Boxes of scientific equipment were scattered about along with a large tube and a table full of papers.

“Warehouses don’t have secret labs, right?” Rev asked with a hint of nervousness.

Tech shook his head. Warehouses definitely shouldn’t have secret laboratories.

Hesitantly, the coyote walked in. He looked around the makeshift lab, trying to get a better sense of what was going on…

He glanced at the table, seeing the papers scattered on its surface. He picked a file up and read the cover of it.

Project Reaper Development it said on the file.

“What’s… Project Reaper?” Tech asked himself before he opened the file. Inside were multiple reports that seemed to span a number of days.

Day 1:

The DNA samples of the two candidates for Project Reaper have been successfully collected. The computer is now running possible combinations of the genetic material extracted from the two samples.

Tech’s brow furrowed, a pit began to form in his stomach. Clearly, this supposed “Project Reaper” was being created out of two samples of DNA. About what kind, Tech wasn’t too sure about. He didn’t like where this was going. Tech flipped over a few more reports before landing on one.

Day 30:

After countless failed combinations, the computer found the suitable combination. This splice of the genetic material will ensure that no complications will arise, according to Dr. M. Dr. M states that this is the most optimal splice since it contains favorable traits between the two samples, despite significant differences. The director still has his reservations.”

Tech’s heart was starting race. It seemed that they had made significant progress on this project, and Tech was starting to worry as he continued on.

Day Day 231

June 1st marks the official date of birth of Project Reaper. Its vitals are stable and like any newborn life form, it responds to stimulus. No complications arose during its development and no visible defects have been detected. Dr. M’s design was promising but it is even more impressive now that Project Reaper has manifested.

Whatever this Project Reaper was, it was alive and breathing. And this Dr. M seemed to be greatly involved in this…

Tech looked around the table, seeing charts and papers. His attention was caught by two vials. He carefully picked them up and inspected them. They were small vials, one topped with a green cap and the other with a red cap.

But what caught Tech’s attention the most was what was in them.

The green-capped vial had a few tuffs of brown fur stuffed inside of it. They looked oddly familiar…

The red-capped vial had a few blue feathers in it.

Tech looked around to see if he could find better lighting. He took out a flashlight from his belt and shined it on the vials. He looked at them closely, mainly at the blue feathers.

They were a certain shade of blue that reminded him of- Tech nearly dropped his flashlight and the vials.

It was Rev’s feathers… he’d recognize that color anywhere. The color coding on the cap wasn’t all that subtle either.

He then looked at the vial with the fur. He put away his flashlight and opened the vial to smell it.

It smelled just like him…

Tech’s nose was never wrong. This was his fur. But why was it here?!

“T-Tech…” Rev said in a shaky voice.

Tech turned to look in Rev’s direction. The roadrunner was standing in front of the glowing glass tube. His eyes were wide, his expression was one of confusion and a hint of fear.

“Rev, what is it?” Tech asked with concern.

“T-there’s… there’s something in here.”

Tech swore his heart dropped at that moment. Something was in the tube… and he had a feeling he already knew what it was.

He made his way over to Rev, to see what was in the tube. He didn’t want to know… he didn’t! But… he had to know…

He looked at the tube full of liquid, his eyes focused on the tiny form that floated in the middle of it.

It was a small creature in a fetal position connected to wires that monitored its vitals.

The creature had long ears like a coyote… but bird like feet and a beak.

“O-oh my god…” Tech whispered in horror, his jaw dropping.

Rev looked over at Tech, his anxiety rose up as he saw the normally cool headed coyote look horrified.

“Te-Tech… what is it…?” Rev asked shakily.

Tech didn’t respond as he was too focused on the small creature in the tube. He just couldn’t tear his eyes off of it for even a moment. His heart was beating furiously out of his chest. His mind was swirling with confusion and panic.

He swallowed dryly, struggling to find his voice.

“I-It’s Project Reaper…”

Chapter Text

Rev looked at Tech like he had just grown three heads.

“I-I’m sorry… Project Reaper? What even is a Project Reaper?!” Rev yelled, panic clear in his expression.

Tech was still trying to process the facts that he had just uncovered.

Fact One, Project Reaper was successful in its attempt at creating a hybrid out of two different species. Fact Two, Project Reaper was right here in some secret and likely illegal laboratory under an abandoned warehouse. And Fact Three, Project Reaper was by all logic, their child.

Tech found his voice again after a few moments. “I-it’s the thing they’ve been working on down here. A hybrid of two different species, a roadrunner and coyote to be exact…”

Rev’s eyes widened at the revelation. A roadrunner and a coyote hybrid sounded stupid AND impossible.

“Th-that’s insane though! A coyote and a roadrunner aren’t in the same genus, let alone class!”

Tech nodded, already aware of the absurdity of a real hybrid from two vastly different species. And yet… here it was, floating in a tube right in front of them.

Some could say it would result in an abomination but… it didn’t seem that way. The creature’s vitals were stable, and no deformities were visible. This was a viable, living organism.

“But it looks like they succeeded… with these…” Tech said as he showed Rev the vials he had found.

Rev took the vials and inspected them. He gasped slightly once he recognized the feathers.

“O-oh my… these are mine!” Rev looked at the vial with his feathers, his hand shaking slightly as he held it.

Tech nodded solemnly, words unable to leave his mouth.

“A-and the f-fur…?” Rev stammered, scared of the answer.

Tech’s heart grew heavy, knowing he’d have to reveal the truth.

“I-it’s mine…”

Rev nearly dropped the vials right then and there. His hand flew up to his mouth as he realized what this meant. His breath quickened as panic began to set in.

“Oh-my-god-oh-my-god-oh-my-god-this-can’t-be-happening-it-can’t-there’s-no-way-“

Tech looked over at Rev, a worried look on his face.

“R-Rev, hey Rev. It’s going to be okay-“ Tech tried to reassure. He stepped forward to try and comfort Rev.

“No it’s not, Tech!” Rev snapped. He rarely ever snapped at people.

Tech backed off a bit, surprised (but also not) that Rev had snapped at him.

“Tech, h-how is this possible?! And why would anyone do this?!” Rev yelled. He didn’t want to believe that it was true… there was no way that the… thing in the tube was…

“I-I don’t know, Rev! B-but I know that this creature is made up of our DNA and it’s almost two months old.”

“T-Two months?! So that means it’s-“

“An infant, I know,” Tech finished.

Rev looked at the infant in the tube and back at Tech. He was scared and confused, his lungs felt like they weren’t taking in enough oxygen. His heart thumped rapidly in his chest.

“W-what are we supposed to… what are we supposed to do with this thing?!” Rev asked.

Tech tried to think about their next course of action.

“We…” Tech started, trying to come up with a solution but coming up blank. He looked over at the tube with the infant inside. The infant looked so peaceful, sleeping and unaware of the panic it was causing for simply being there.

Tech’s gaze wandered around the tube, stopping at the control panel. Without thinking, he walked over to the control panel.

“Tech, Tech, what are you doing?” Rev asked.

Tech didn’t listen to Rev, his body operating on autopilot. His fingers flew over the control panel with ease.

After a sequence of button presses and switches, the liquid from the tube began to drain.

“Tech what are you-“

“Quick, get me something to dry it with,” Tech commanded, his voice firm.

Rev wanted to argue but Tech’s tone left no room for that nor doubt. With his sonic speed, Rev ran around the room trying to find a towel or blanket of sorts to cover the infant. Tech only watched as the tube was drained of liquid, causing the infant to sink down to the ground.

All the liquid was gone from the tube after a few minutes, leaving the creature lying on the floor. It then began to squirm, already feeling the change in temperature. It then let out a cry.

Rev and Tech’s hearts nearly stopped at the cry. It really was just an infant. Rev had finally found a towel in a box before he ran over and handed it to Tech.

Tech took the towel and pressed a few more buttons that caused the glass to slide down. Tech crouched down, reaching over to take off the sensors attached to the infant. They were easily removed.

The infant was starting to squirm more, letting out more cries. The cries were like those of a pup. Tech felt his heart pound and also drop at the sound. It was hurting him to hear the infant cry.

Tech took a deep breath before he picked the infant up, wrapping the towel around it. He got up slowly and held the infant close to his chest.

Now that it wasn’t submerged in liquid, Tech could get a better look at it. The infant was covered in bluish grey fur with a small purple crest between long coyote ears. Its beak was dark gray and in a shape similar to Rev’s.

It still let out whines, snuggling against the older coyote’s chest. It was seeking out the warmth that seeped through Tech’s power suit. The coyote’s heart was hurting at the sight. He couldn’t help but rock the infant gently in his arms, trying to soothe its cries.

Rev looked around the lab, walking over to the table that Tech had looked over earlier. He began to scan through the different papers and diagrams. Carnivorous diet, psychological profile, and aggression were a few words that stood out to the roadrunner.

He then found a sheet that seemed to include useful information. His eyes scanned through it quickly, and his heart dropped for what seemed like the millionth time that minute.

“Tech… you might want to get away from the… the infant,” Rev said.

“Why?”

“Because it may decide to kill us a few years from now…” Rev said in an uncharacteristically cold tone.

Tech turned around to look at Rev in disbelief. “Wha-“

Rev began to read out the paper in front of him.

“Project Reaper is an attempt at creating a hybrid offspring of Loonatics Tech E. Coyote and Rev Runner. The final product will be a skilled and aggressive specimen…” Rev paused for a moment before continuing. “…capable of exterminating powerful individuals including the likes of the Loonatics,”

Tech had to stop himself from nearly dropping the infant, holding it tighter to his chest. Exterminate them…?

The coyote looked down at the infant. He almost couldn’t believe it. This small and defenseless creature in his arms, whining like a pup, was designed to kill him and those he cared for. He told himself he didn’t believe it but moments ago, he didn’t believe that Project Reaper would even succeed. Look how wrong he was.

“G-god… th-that’s…” Tech couldn’t even put into words the shock and almost fear he felt at that moment. Here he was, rocking the infant that would grow up to destroy everything he loved and worked for. He wanted to feel angry, disgusted at it… but he couldn’t.

“It’s not its fault,” Tech reminded himself.

Whoever did this, whoever succeeded in bringing this creature into the world had messed up big time.

“Tech… what now…?” Rev asked.

Tech stayed silent for a few moments to weigh his options. As he looked down at the infant, so many emotions began to overwhelm him. It left him with a painful lump in his throat and a pressure on his chest. Pain, fear, anger, worry, and sadness were just a few he could describe. But all of them were overridden by a sense of protectiveness.

“There’s no way in hell I’m just leaving it here,” the coyote thought.

“We… we can’t leave it here…” Tech decided, keeping the infant close to him.

Rev didn’t agree nor protest, remaining silent. After a few tense moments, Rev spoke up.

“Alright, go on ahead. I’ll collect everything here…” Rev said.

Tech didn’t object to that, finding it to be a good idea. If the person who did this was still out there, they had to make sure they wouldn’t get their work back. The last thing the two wanted was for another hybrid to be made. Tech made his way out of the lab, leaving Rev alone for a while.

“He may need the time to process,” Tech thought as he made his way down the corridor.

The infant had seized its crying a while ago, finding comfort in the newfound source of warmth that was Tech.

A few minutes later, Tech found himself outside the warehouse and into the jet that had been left nearby. Tech walked in through the open ramp. Tech sat down in the co pilot seat, never once letting go of the infant. The solitude allowed him to reflect on the day’s events.

This was the first good day in a while and now, it was possibly the worst. What were they going to do now? Tech tried to come up with solutions to his problem, just to provide himself a bit of comfort.

What would the Loonatics think- oh god, the others! What would they think if Tech and Rev brought a hybrid infant that was designed to kill them all?! Not to mention, it was his and Rev’s kid. They’d probably just die right then and there, completing the child’s mission for it.

Tech took a deep breath, trying to psych himself up. He needed to tell the others, they needed to know. Tech reached over the console and pressed a few keys to contact Ace. He quickly saw that there had been a message left by said bunny. He pressed play and a hologram recording of Ace emerged.

“Hey you two, hope ya got the job done without too much trouble!” Ace said with his usual charismatic smile. “Anyway, just letting ya know that something came up over on another planet. Zadavia’s coming with us. We’ll be back in like… a week.”

A week?! Tech’s ears drooped as he realized him and Rev would be alone for a week… with an infant to take care of.

“Anyway, take care you two! I’m sure Acmetropolis will be in good hands. Ace out!” The hologram message disappeared right after.

“Just my luck…” Tech growled. He knew that they wouldn’t be able to contact them until they came back.

The infant began to stir a bit in Tech’s arms, letting out whines. Tech began to rock the infant in his arms, trying to soothe it.

“T-there there, don’t cry…” Tech said awkwardly. It was pointless, the infant wouldn’t understand what that would mean.

Luckily, the infant’s cries were quieting down a bit. Tech let out a sigh of relief as he continued to rock the infant.

A few minutes later, Rev had arrived with a bunch of boxes. He balanced them all carefully before setting them down on the floor. He made his way over to the pilot’s seat and slumped down.

“Got everything?” Tech asked, still rocking the infant.

Rev nodded as he rubbed his temples. “Yeah… I got everything. It was… a lot. We’ll have to go over it once we get back. Did you contact Ace and the others?”

“I did. Sadly, they’re on a mission on another planet and Zadavia’s tagging along with them.”

Rev huffed in annoyance, his crest flared up. “Are you serious? That’s just great.”

“Tell me about it. When you need them the most, those guys just vanish,” Tech added, agreeing with Rev.

Rev seemed deflated from everything that had just happened. He was starting to act like Tech more than Tech was. Rev crossed his arms and bounced his leg up and down at sonic speed. It was a habit of his since he was young, which only became more frequent due to his enhanced speed.

He was nervous, Tech could tell. The coyote thought for a moment, trying to formulate a plan. He was the guy with the plans after all, he had to be.

”What do we need to do first?”, Tech thought to himself. “Get supplies.”

They needed supplies if they were going to take care of the infant at all. Tech may not have experience in childcare but he knew what essentials were needed.

“Alright, we need to go and get stuff for the little one.” Tech said, reaching over to the console again to search up nearby stores.

“The Tower is equipped for all kinds of situation but it’s obviously not an ideal environment for an infant,” Tech added, scrolling through the search results on the holopad.

Rev let out a dry chuckle. “Yeah, I don’t think a hybrid child made to destroy us was on the list of potential threats.”

Tech finally clicked on a search result, Walmart. Rev looked over and quirked his eyebrow.

“Walmart? We’re going to Walmart?” Rev asked with a hint of amusement.

Tech nodded. “Yes, we’re going to Walmart. It’s the nearest store with almost everything we need. It should be fine for now.”

Rev let out a sigh and nodded. He pulled up directions, trying to figure out where they could subtly land the jet near said store.

“Alright, to Walmart it is. Two superheroes and a hybrid infant at Walmart, should be an easy and quick trip,” Rev muttered as he switched on the controls of the jet.

Tech rolled his eyes. “We’ve got some civilian clothing in the back, we’ll be fine.”

The jet slowly lifted off the ground, the destination already set. The infant was startled by the noise of the jet’s rumbling, causing it to cry. Tech rocked the hybrid more, cupping his hand over its ears to hopefully block out the sound.

And then, they were off.

Chapter Text

The jet had landed a few minutes away from the Walmart. Tech and Rev had already changed into civilian clothing, putting away their power suits before they left.

Now, they stood in front of the Walmart, its yellow glowing sign glaring right at them. Tech still carried the bundled up infant in his arms, tucking its ears in under the towel wrapped around it.

“Well, we’re here…” Rev said with a hint of nervousness. He wasn’t exactly looking forward to this.

“Just act normal,” Tech groaned, exasperated at the roadrunner. Rev wasn’t exactly being helpful in soothing Tech’s nerves. “The less attention we draw to ourselves, the quicker we can get out of here.”

Rev nodded, agreeing with Tech’s statement. “Yeah, okay. Everything’s gonna be fine… you got this…” Rev mumbled.

The coyote felt a bit better at Rev’s words. “Yeah, we’ll be okay-“

Rev quickly clarified, “I was talking to myself-“

“Okay.” Tech mumbled, realizing his mistake. His eye twitched, feeling his irritation toward the roadrunner grow a bit more.

The two walked into the store, the infant still held close to Tech’s chest. Rev grabbed a cart on the way. They were greeted by the usual Walmart employee whom they quickly acknowledged before heading off to the baby aisle.

Once they reached the aisle, Tech started to browse around the shelves. Rev stood to the side pushing the cart. The roadrunner looked at the shelves and realized something.

“I have no flipping clue what I’m looking at,” Rev thought.

Out of the two, Tech seemed to know what he was doing. It wasn’t a surprise, given the coyote’s extensive knowledge of seemingly everything. Sure, he definitely didn’t know jack about raising a child but he had his knowledge and determination to try at his disposal.

“So… what are we looking for?” Rev inquired, looking at all the items.

Tech had already made a mental list of things on their way to the store. “We’ll need diapers, clothing, toys, a crib, a carrier, formula, and more,” Tech listed.

“Alright, sounds pretty good. Just what we need for a baby,” Rev mused.

“… that we didn’t know we had… and was made to kill us…”

“Rev, you’re not helping,” Tech hissed, feeling his irritation flare up.

Rev quickly shook his head, trying to get the thoughts out of his head. “Yeah, I know. I’m sorry, I’m sorry,” he apologized.

“I’m just a bit on edge.. you know because… we’re basically parents now…” he began. Once he made that statement, the reality of the situation began to set in.

“Oh my god, we’re parents now-but-we-literally-have-no-idea-what-we-are-doing-we’re-superheroes-for-crying-out-loud-“

Tech rolled his eyes, irritated that Rev was going on a speedy ramble. “Here we go again,” he thought.

“Rev I’d shut you up but I have the-“

Rev didn’t listen to Tech, listing out the possible scenarios running through his mind. “We-could-accidentally-lose-the-infant-get-the-infant-killed-a-villain-may-kidnap-it-it-could-kill-us-“

Tech groaned as Rev continued on his ramble. Sadly, he couldn’t stop the roadrunner while his hands were occupied. He just hoped the roadrunner wouldn’t wake the infant up.

“What-if-everyone-can-see-that-we’re-crappy-parents-What-if-they-think-we-stole-the-baby-which-technically-we-did-but-it-could-be-said-we-had-good-reason-“

“Rev, shut up.”

“Like-what-if-they-think-the-baby-isn’t-ours-which-it-is-but-they-think-it-isn’t-What-if-they-ask-for-the-birth-certificate-to-identify-the-infant-it-doesn’t-have-a-birth-certificate-Tech-the-baby-doesn’t-exist-according-to-the-government-“

Tech snapped in a hushed tone, “Hijo de- Rev! No one’s gonna ask for a birth certificate as a form of identification! Walmart doesn’t pay their employees enough for that!”

Tech looked over at Rev, holding out the infant. His arms were throbbing in slight pain as a result of carrying the infant for a good while. “Here, hold the infant while I go get the rest of what we need.”

Rev was caught off guard, stopping his speedy ramble. His crest flared up. “W-wha- you’re handing it to me?!”

“Yes, I’m handing it to you. Don’t let it drop, support the head, and you’ll be fine,” Tech groaned.

Rev looked around, trying to avert his gaze away from the awaiting coyote. “C’mon Tech! I’m on cart duty-“

With a flick of his wrist, Tech pulled the cart toward him using his magnekinesis. “No, I’m on cart duty,” he said with finality before he handed the infant over to Rev’s reluctant arms.

Rev was going to protest but Tech had already left with the cart.

Rev stood in the middle of the aisle, dumbfounded and awkward. He wasn’t sure if he just had to stand there.

“O-okay, Tech just left me with an infant I have no idea how to handle. It sh-should be fine, right?” Rev told himself. He stood there awkwardly, fidgeting a bit.

The infant began to stir a bit, letting out a whine. Rev looked down at the infant, a bit startled by the sudden whine.

“O-oh no, no-no-no-no-no-no, please don’t cry…” Rev pleaded. The last thing he wanted to deal with was a crying infant in the middle of Walmart. His mind raced a mile a minute trying to figure out how to stop a possible tantrum. He decided to try singing.

“U-uhm, go to sleep, go to sleep, please don’t cry in the middle of Walmart~” Rev sung, making up the lyrics as he went along.

“Because if you cry, then I will cry, so please don’t cry~” Rev continued, feeling like an absolute idiot.

Rev began to rock the infant in his arms, trying to imitate how Tech did it. The infant’s cries were quieting down a bit, making Rev feel more calm.

Rev finished singing, “Just eat, sleep, and sugar honey ice tea~”

He then paused for a moment before adding, “Actually please don’t do that last thing, you don’t have a diaper on.”

The infant quieted down, going back to sleep. Rev actually couldn’t believe that his stupid lullaby worked. But now that he thought about it, the rocking might have been more helpful.

Rev looked around, trying to look for the coyote. “Tech… hurry up…” Rev muttered to himself. His heart was still racing and his crest was raised up slightly. He was tapping his foot like a rabbit at sonic speed.

The roadrunner began to grow restless as he stood there in the aisle. He then walked around a bit, looking at the shelves as he searched for Tech. God, he felt like a lost puppy trying to find the coyote.

“Aw, is that your baby?” a woman behind Rev cooed, having noticed the infant in Rev’s arms.

Rev felt his blood run cold as he swiftly turned around to look at the woman with a man. They seemed to be a couple. Okay, now he was panicking.

“U-um yeah! This is… m-my baby,” Rev said, trying to keep his voice steady.

The man and woman smiled, unaware of Rev’s nervousness. The man added as he admired the infant, “Oh congratulations. He’s precious.”

Rev would have corrected the man if he knew what the baby’s gender was. Crap, he didn’t know his own baby’s gender. What kind of parent didn’t know their kid’s gender?! (The kind that didn’t know they had a kid) He decided to play along with their assumptions.

“Oh thank you, he… he’s a handful but very well behaved,” Rev said.

The couple chuckled a bit at the response. “What’s your little one’s name?” the woman asked.

“Crap, it needs a name too…” Rev thought. Rev blurted out the first thing that came to mind.

“R-Reaper, his name’s Reaper.”

The couple looked at Rev a bit surprised and amused. “Reaper? Quite a scary sounding name, isn’t it?” the woman jested.

The roadrunner chuckled, shrugging his shoulders. “Yeah well, he can be scary… because of how…”

How the infant was designed to kill him and basically reap his soul? Yeah, very fitting.

“How… adorable he is. He already has us wrapped around his little finger,” Rev finished. He looked down at the infant and rocked it in his arms, playing the role of a fond parent.

“It’s… scary how much power he has over us…”

The couple awed at the statement, touched by the sentiment.

“You’re very fortunate. We’re expecting a little one of our own too,” the man revealed, a warm smile on his face. Her wife looked up at him and smiled as well, exuding warmth and joy.

Rev looked up at them and gave them a nod. They seemed excited to be parents, and he was happy for them.

“Congrats, I hope it all goes well. I’m sure you’ll be amazing parents,” he assured with sincerity.

The couple thanked him for his kind words. “So, are you shopping with your spouse for the little one as well?”

“Crap, I forgot about Tech,” Rev realized as he rocked the infant. He looked around and saw Tech coming his way.

“O-oh yeah! My… ‘husband’ and I are shopping for the little one,” Rev answered.

Tech walked over with the cart full of items. He looked at Rev, his gaze seemed to ask what the roadrunner was doing. The roadrunner put on a smile and spoke to Tech in a loving tone.

“Hey, babe! Got everything?” Rev asked as he signaled at the couple with his eyes, hoping Tech would get the hint and play along.

The nickname caught Tech by surprise, his face flushed a bit. It took the coyote a moment to catch on. He immediately jumped into the role of a loving spouse. “Oh yeah, I got most of it. I was just looking for you and the baby.”

“Yeah, I was wondering where you ran off to,” Rev joked, making a subtle jab at Tech.

Tech scoffed a bit, knowing he had been the one that left the roadrunner behind with the infant. “Yeah sorry, love,” he said in an apologetic tone.

Rev felt his heart skip a beat as Tech called him ‘love’.

He looked over at the woman. “Husbands. You never know when they run off or even where to,” he joked.

The woman let out a laugh, nodding her head. “The kids won’t be the only ones that need one of those backpacks with the leashes,” she quipped. Her husband playfully scoffed, nudging her softly.

Tech laughed with a bit of strain. He walked over to Rev, and wrapped an arm around the roadrunner. He nuzzled his face against the top of Rev’s head. Rev’s face warmed up at the (false) loving gesture, his feathers puffed up slightly.

“Yeah, yeah. We get a bit carried away, don’t we?” Tech bantered.

The conversation died down and the couples bid each other a good evening.

As soon as Rev and Tech turned around and walked away, they immediately dropped the act.

“Thanks for leaving me behind, jackass,” Rev hissed.

Tech retorted, “You didn’t drop the infant. Color me impressed.”

“Yeah, of course I didn’t drop the infant. I’m not stupid,” Rev grumbled, still holding said infant.

“I never said you were. It just looked like I was making you hold a hydrogen bomb, and that you were being held at gun point-“

The couple looked over as Tech and Rev bickered. They didn’t know what exactly they were bickering about but it was obvious from a distance.

“Hm, seems like they’ve been married for a long time” the woman concluded. Her husband nodded, looking over at the two with an amused gaze.

“Seems like it. You think we’ll be like that in a few years?” he quipped.

His wife chuckled, shaking her head. “You think I’d be able to stand you for that long? Please.” She walked away, making her way toward the other aisle.

“You’re so mean,” the man playfully pouted as he followed his wife.

Tech and Rev got everything they needed, practically racing toward the cash register. They quickly got to the cash register, and paid for the items.

Once they were done, they rushed over to the restrooms so they could clean up the infant and dress it up. Rev waited outside the restroom with the cart full of items.

Tech emerged with a fully cleaned and dressed infant. The infant was wrapped in a new, electric blue swaddle blanket as it sucked on a pacifier.

“Alright, um… the infant’s all clean and dressed up,” Tech said.

Rev nodded. “That’s good. Reaper should feel a bit more comfortable now that he isn’t just bundled up in that towel.”

Tech quirked an eyebrow. “We’re naming him Reaper?” Tech inquired.

So Reaper was a boy.

“U-um yeah, it seems fitting. Unless if you have any other ideas?” Rev suggested.

Tech thought for a moment, his brain went over possible names other than ‘Reaper’. But he didn’t exactly find ones he liked and ‘Reaper’ seemed good enough.

“Mhm… nope. Reaper’s good,” Tech replied as he looked down at the infant.

“Alright… let’s go home,” Rev said as he pushed the cart. Tech followed behind with the infant. They were ready to leave, but were they ready for the rest of their new lives?