Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

It’s been three days since Carla stared into Lisa Swains eyes. Three days since Lisa rushed out. Three days since the pair have acknowledged each other.

Carla’s mind has been racing the past few days. She never considered the possibility of falling for someone of the same gender. Not this late into her life. She was making herself go crazy replaying the moment with Lisa over and over again in her mind. Carla might be the most confused she has been but she knew one thing for certain, she had to talk to Lisa. And Carla knew exactly where to find her.

Okay, maybe Carla didn’t know Lisa as well as she thought she did. She’s been waiting under the stairs at the police station for the last fifteen minutes. No sign of the women she most desperately wants to talk to. Another 10 minutes go by, the doors to the police station open. Carla springs up from her chair.

“Lisa, hi. We need to talk”

“If you have a police matter to report speak to the front desk. I’m busy.”

“Lisa please”

“It’s DS Swain. And do you mind I’ve got a lot of work to do” Lisa remarked.

“Okay DS Swain then. Please just talk to me. This is important. I don’t want to lose our friendship over this” Carla begged.

For a split second DS Swain dropped the facade and her facial expressions softened. She nodded her head towards an interview room; silently communicating with Carla for her to follow. Lisa was about to talk when Carla cut her off, wanting to be the one to explain herself.

“I wanted to say sorry, you must think I’m some sort of tourist or something” Carla says awkwardly.

“Don’t. Don’t do that. Don’t put words into my mouth. But yeah. Tourist sums it up pretty nicely. Had a few drinks and wanted to have a bit of fun with a woman. You straight birds honestly. All the same.” Lisa harshly spits back.

Carla was stunned. It was clear she was talking to DS Swain right now and not the Lisa she was beginning to fall for. Carla knew the harsh words Lisa spoke was to try and push Carla away. To protect herself. DS Swain was building her walls up so high. Carla felt as though the truth would only make the situation worse. It was clear that DS Swain needed a friend. A friend to help Lisa lose the DS Swain hard act. A friend to show Lisa that her walls don’t need to be built up that high.

“Lisa your friendship means so much to me. I enjoy the time we have been spending together. Please, please, please can we put this behind us. I don’t want this to be the end of what could have been a beautiful friendship”.

A small smile found the way to Lisa’s lips. It was clear that Carla was not going anywhere.
“Okay” Lisa says.

“Okay. So we are going to stop avoiding each other then, yeah Lisa?”

“Yeah Carla” Lisa turns to leave. “ I think we both better get off to work”

Carla walks out of the door first. Turning the wrong way towards the exit. Hearing a snicker from Lisa she turns around. “What?” Carla exclaims.

“Your going the wrong way”

“Right, thanks” Carla awkwardly responds. Turning around and walking the correct way out of the Police station.

Driving back to underworld Carla felt a slight weight being lifted off of her shoulders. However still slightly annoyed at herself that she didn’t tell Lisa the whole truth. Because Carla doesn’t think she’s a tourist. She doesn’t think the moment was just a bit of fun. And she just wished she had someone to talk to about all of this. She tried to talk to Ryan but she didn’t feel like she couldn’t articulate her thoughts properly. Talking about Lisa made her feel like she was 10 with her first crush all over again. Ryan didn’t help with that feeling either. Teasing Carla about wanting to kiss the police detective. She appreciates Ryan for acting so casually. Like it wasn’t a big deal for Carla to have a crush on a female. And she knows deep down that Ryan is right. She wants to kiss Lisa Swain.

Carla Connor wants to kiss Lisa Swain. The same Lisa Swain who thinks Carla is a tourist. The same Lisa Swain that Carla had agreed to be just friends with.

Carla put her car in park and rested her head on the steering wheel. It was obvious these feelings for Lisa were not going away any time soon. And for the first time in a very long time, Carla was unsure what to do next.

Chapter Text

Carla needed a drink. The day had been a whirlwind for her. She locked up her office and headed over to the pub. A few glasses of red wine was definitely needed. Walking through the pub doors Carla spotted that Lisa was there straight away. Her blonde her no longer pulled up into a tight bun. Carla’s heart sunk thinking that there was the potential that Lisa was on a date with somebody else. Curiosity got the better of her as her eyes tracked Lisa back to her booth. Relief came over Carla as she saw that Lisa was just with her daughter Betsy. ‘Oh Lisa Swain what are you doing to me’ thought Carla.

“You alright there Carla, barely moved since you’ve come in” Ryan states, bringing Carla back out of her trance.

“Yeah, all good. I didn’t know you were working a shift here tonight”

“I wasn’t meant to but got called in to cover and you know me, always the hard worker. Want your usual?”

“Yes please Ryan, love”

Over at the booth Lisa was unaware that Carla had walked into the pub. Lisa was just thankful to have clocked off work early so that she could spend some quality time with her daughter Betsy. Since the death of her partner Becky, Lisa hasn’t spent enough time with Betsy as she would have liked. Lisa through herself into work at any given possibility to reduce the amount of grief she felt. But now seeing how broken her relationship is with her daughter, Lisa feels so guilty that she spent so much time away.

“I’m sorry.” Lisa says out loud towards Betsy’s direction.

“What. What you apologising for. Have you done something bad? Is that what this is all about? You want to tell me you’ve done something stupid and have to go away” Betsy anxiously rambles.

“No, no. Nothing bad I promise darling”

“Then what mum”

Lisa’s heart flutters at the word mum. She hasn’t heard Betsy call her that in ages. “I just wanted to apologise about not being present as much as I would have liked. The past few years have been tough on both of us and I feel like I haven’t taken the best care of you. I do love you kiddo, I’m just not the best at showing it”

“No you really aren’t that great at showing it. But I guess I should be apologising too. I haven’t made it easy for you these last few years. Working at the factory, and all the stuff with Mason has made me realise that I need to step up. It’s just me and you now that mums gone so I need to help out as well. I love you mum, I know I don’t say it as often as I should.” Betsy feels relieved to get that all off her chest. Actually have a proper conversation with her mum without one of them storming off.

Back at the bar and Carla has finished off her first drink ordering another glass of red wine. She glances over at the booth with the detective and her daughter. It is taking everything in her power not to walk over to Lisa. To have Lisa acknowledge her. Lisa isn’t even facing her, Betsy is. And great she’s made direct eye contact with Betsy. Not what she wanted to do. She flicks a quick smile over in Betsy’s direction before turning back and taking a sip of the red wine Ryan put in front of her.

“Mum I’m just going to talk to Ms Connor if that’s alright”

The sound of Carla’s name made Lisa automatically search round the pub to see where Carla was. “Of course love, tell her I said Hi will you” Lisa says still staring at Carla. Betsy leaves to go over to the bar.

“Hi Ms Connor”.

“Hi Betsy, what brings you over”

“Well me and mum were talking about our feelings. Being open and honest and stuff. And so while I was still in the mood I wanted to say thank you. Like I don’t keep a gratitude journal or stuff but if I did you’d be top of the list”

Carla was shocked about the honesty coming from the teenager. Not even a hint of sarcasm came from Betsy.

“Well thanks. It’s good to know that if you kept a gratitude journal I’d be top”. Carla states unsure what to say.

“Mum says hi by the way. Come to our booth? I would like to buy you a drink but under 18 and all that so mum would have to do it”

“Yeah, sure let me just finish this” Carla finishes off the last two sips of her wine and heads over to the booth with Betsy. Needing all the courage she could get to face Lisa after their conversation earlier.

“You can say Hi yourself now mum. Oh and you’re buying Carla a drink from me” the teenager tells her mum while sliding back into the booth opposite her mum.

Carla silently curses Betsy in her head. Leaving the only available seat next to Lisa which Carla wasn’t sure if she wanted to do. Betsy flicks her eyes back and forth between her mum and Carla who was still standing up.

“Are you two okay. You’ve both like frozen” remarks Betsy. The sarcastic remark managed to snap Lisa back into consciousness.

“Hi Carla, sit down. I’ll go up to the bar and order. What would you like?”

“Oh no it’s okay. I best be off. Can’t have too many red wines in one night. I just wanted to come over and say Hi and well bye I guess” Carla stutters over her words giving an awkward wave as she turns to leave.

“Well that was weird wasn’t it” Betsy says to her mum.

“Yeah very weird” Lisa reiterated

Carla headed home. She knew she couldn’t be around Lisa tonight. All she would want to do is sit close to Lisa and Carla couldn’t trust herself anymore. Not after the other night. Lisa was with her daughter. They are both still grieving. It was clear that Betsy wasn’t ready to entertain the idea of her mum having a new partner. Not after all the remarks the last couple of weeks. Carla used to take no notice of them. But now? After staring longingly into Lisa’s eyes, tucking the loose strand of hair behind Lisa’s ears, maybe just maybe Carla wanted something more than a friendship from Lisa. Carla wasn’t even sure if Lisa was ready for another relationship. Especially with the three year anniversary of her wife’s death coming up. It was decided then and there that Carla would burry her feelings so deeply until Lisa and Betsy were ready. And if that never happened, well Carla hadn’t thought that far ahead.

Back at the pub Lisa begins typing out a message to Carla. ‘Shame you had to rush off so fast. Drinks another time?’. That’s what friends do right? They invite each other out for drinks right? Lisa’s fingers hovering over the send button.

“Mum do you think we could visit mums grave together this year”

“Really? Together? We’ve not done that since the funeral” Lisa forgets all about her phone. Her attention focusing back on Betsy.

“Yeah well, I never actually liked visiting alone. I just didn’t feel like I could go with you. Sorry I know that sounds mean” Betsy was trying to be careful with her words. Lisa could tell her daughter was trying.

“Of course. I’d love to visit Becky together. I’m sure Becky would love that as well” Lisa smiles over across to her daughter. Their relationship has been improving the last couple of months. Lisa didn’t want to affect that in anyway. So she did what she thought was best. She built her walls back up. She deleted the message to Carla.

“Come here love, let’s head home”. Homes a funny word Lisa thinks. Because their house doesn’t feel much like a home. Not yet anyway.

Chapter Text

“Betsy come on. If you’re going to be on time for work we’ve got to leave now” Lisa shouted up the stairs. Since Lisa was taken off of the Joel Deering case she’s had more time in the morning to focus on Betsy. “Betsy!” She shouts again.

“Alright, alright mum I’m coming” Betsy says while slowly strolling down the stairs. “What’s got you so stressed out this morning”

“Nothing that concerns you Betsy, not yet anyway.” Lisa sighs.

“What’s that supposed to mean?” questioned Betsy.

“I have no idea yet kiddo. I’ve got to see DI Castello when I arrive at work today. A little stressed if I’m honest. Sorry if it seems I’m taking it out on you”

“It’s okay mum. We are both trying to learn new habits. Not going to change over night is it” Betsy remarked.

“Right love, let’s get going. Don’t want to make Carla annoyed first thing in the morning do we”.

There was a comfortable silence between the mother and daughter during the car ride over to the factory. Betsy daydreaming out the window listening to her own music through her headphones. Lisa having some of her music on low volume in the background. The pair haven’t felt like this for a while. Now that Lisa thinks about it, she’s not quite sure her and Betsy have left the house without arguing since Becky died. It feels good to be rebuilding her relationship with her daughter again.

“Mum do you have time to quickly come in. I want to show you something I’ve been working on for college. Carla, I mean Ms Connor, has been letting me use the machines at the factory”. Betsy says quietly. Almost expecting rejection.

“Sure I’d love to. Has to be quick though Betsy, you’ve got about 5 minutes”. Lisa could see that Betsy looked shocked at her answer. A couple of weeks ago Lisa definitely would have said no. Both Betsy and Lisa exit the car and enter through the doors into underworld. Lisa had been her enough times to know where Betsy’s desk was but let her daughter lead the way. It was clear that Betsy was excited.

“So obviously I didn’t want to show off underwear for my college project. Like imagine how embarrassing. So I’ve been working on this” Betsy moved out of the way to show a cream sweater vest with the embroidered letters LS in the top left corner.
“It’s not finished yet. Do you erm, do you like it” Betsy says nervously. Lisa reaches out for Betsy and pulls her into a tight hug.

“I can’t believe you’re remaking the sweater. Thank you Betsy. You’ve got no idea how much this means to me”. Lisa was slightly emotional at the college project in front of her.

“Well the prompt was something sentimental and my teacher said to try challenge ourselves and make something that would be sentimental to someone else. And well I knew how upset you were when the original sweater vest mum got you shrunk so… yeah”
Lisa pulls Betsy into another tight hug. “Thank you Betsy. I love it. Can’t wait for your project to be over. I’ll wear it every day”

“Told you she’d love it Betsy. Although maybe don’t wear it every day. You’ll start to smell”. Lisa turned around already knowing who was speaking without having to look.

“I suppose I should say thank you to you as well Carla. For letting her use the sewing machines here” Lisa clarified.

“Oh it’s no problem. Betsy here has a gift. As long as she fulfils her work orders for the day she’s more than welcome to use the machines here”.

“Right I best be off. Already stayed longer than I planned. It was nice seeing you Carla. Betsy be good. Love you”
After such a good moment Lisa didn’t want to go to work but she knew she had to. She needed to know why DI Castello wanted a meeting with her. As far as Lisa was concerned she hadn’t broken any rules recently.

Lisa was taken to DI Castello’s office as soon as she walked into the police station. This felt too official to be just a catch up about cases.

“Morning Lisa, please come in make yourself comfortable”

Lisa sits down. Most definitely uncomfortable.

“Right let’s cut to the chase shall we. We’ve had a complaint about you from another colleague. They state that your interfering in a case that they are leading”

Lisa knew who made the complaint straight away. Kit Green. The officer who had taken over the Joel Deering case. “If I may Castello, I’ve not been interfering. Green has been discussing the case and I’ve simply offered my opinion. He doesn’t have to take anything I’ve said into consideration. Especially if he thinks it’s wrong”.

“Look DS Swain. I trust you. Of course I do. You’re one of my longest employees here. But I’ve got to take Green’s claims seriously”.

“You’ve got to be kidding me. I’m going to be suspended pending investigation. This is ridiculous” Lisa states clearly frustrated.

“DS Swain. Stop going off on a tangent. I’ve not said that. However if I hear or if it is reported that you have been offering your opinion on the Joel Deering case, I will have no choice but to suspend you. Use this as your formal warning. Now get to work”.

“Yes sir”. Lisa sighed in relief. On one hand she was glad to be keeping her job but on the other hand, she was absolutely furious at Kit Green. How dare he try and get her suspended. For absolutely no reason whatsoever. If he thought she was bad before, he’s not going to like how close of an eye Lisa is going to keep on him now.

Lisa walks back through the doors of underworld. A completely different mood to this morning. What a difference a day makes.

Carla watched as Lisa made her way to Betsy’s desk. Betsy’s shift ended over an hour ago. Lisa was late to picking her up. The teenager was annoyed at first until Carla reminded her that she could then spend more time on the sweater vest. Before she realised what she was doing Carla was walking out of her office and towards Betsy’s desk. It was like she had not control over her mind or body when Lisa Swain was around.

“Hi you two everything all good” Carla ensure what possessed her to interrupt Lisa and Betsy’s conversation.

“Oh perfect Ms Connor. Mum’s giving me one of her lame excuses on why she was over an hour late to picking me up” Betsy sarcastically states.

“I’ve said I’m sorry Betsy. My meeting with Castello overran and I had a lot of work to do today”.

“Oh as per. Work comes first”

“Betsy that’s not what I meant”

Carla felt very out of place during this conversation between the mother and daughter. She wasn’t sure if she should interrupt and act as some sort of peace maker. She looked over at Lisa who looked desperate for some help. Carla so hoped she wasn’t over stepping.

“Hey Betsy you wouldn’t have had a chance to fix that seem today if your mum was on time. Remember what I told you. You’ve got to find a positive to the negative. And your mum would have been on time if she could have”.

“That’s not fair Ms Connor your always on her side”

“I’m not on anyone’s side Betsy. In fact” Carla pauses turning to face Lisa “your mum could have texted. Saying she was running late.”

Lisa went a little sheepish when Carla pointed out Lisa’s mistake. Betsy wouldn’t have been so mad at her if she had just sent a little text. How could she have been so stupid. “Sorry Betsy. I should have texted” Lisa apologised.

Betsy felt a little bad seeing how apologetic her mum was. It was clear she had a bad day at work and Betsy hadn’t helped. She’s glad her mum has a friend like Carla to help her relax. A few months ago and her mum would still be uptight about her bad day at work tomorrow. As much as Betsy resented her mums friendship with Carla at the beginning, she can see how much Carla is helping her leave work at work. In fact Carla is helping them both. Betsy wouldn’t mind if Carla stayed around forever. “I’m sorry for being snappy as well mum. I’ll go wait in the car”. She gives her mum a quick hug before leaving.

“Your trying your best you know” Carla tells Lisa

“Sometimes it’s hard not to let work life affect my every day life”

“Want to talk about it?”

Lisa contemplates the offer. Really tempted to spend some more one on one time with Carla.
“Sorry, as much as I would love to I’ve got to take Betsy home”

“I didn’t mean go out for a drink or anything Lisa. I meant do you want to vent about your bad day”. Carla tried again to help the detective open up.

“Got a formal warning at work to leave Kit alone to work on the Joel Deering case. Will get suspended if I don’t. Just frustrated I guess”. You could see the tension lift from Lisa’s shoulders. She was glad she told someone.

“Well maybe you need to find a positive to the negative as well. Just like I told Betsy.” Carla tried to give some advice. Fully prepared for Lisa to ignore her.

“Not sure what positive I’ll be able to find but I’ll give it ago. You’re a good friend to me Carla. I really appreciate it”.

“I try my best.” Carla paused. “Your a good friend to me to”.

“Right I have to go before that child of mine decides to drive herself home. I’ll see you around”

“Bye Lisa” Carla chuckles.

As soon as Lisa’s out of sight Carla sinks into the closest seat to her. Friends. A word she was once delighted to be called by Lisa. But now? That word serves as a reminder for something she can’t have. It’s going to take Carla a while to get used to the idea of being just friends. She understands why they can only be friends. But that doesn’t make it hurt any less.

Chapter Text

Lisa pulls her car into the familiar spot outside of Underworld. She takes a deep breath before opening her car door and following Betsy in.

“Uh mum, I promise I’m not ditching work. Or college. You don’t have to keep following me in” Betsy’s frustration with her mum beginning to show.
Lisa chuckles to herself remembering what it feels like to be a teenager with a parent cramping their style. “Unfortunately for you love, my friend is your boss. And I’d actually quite like to see her so I’m going to follow you in”.

“Seriously, do you have to. Can you just not see each other later or something. I’m not a child”

Lisa felt bad that Betsy felt so suffocated. She appreciated that the teenager was expressing her feelings. Lisa wasn’t so sure she could fully trust the teenager though. Not with the frequent calls from the college stating that Betsy had skipped. Or the many times Carla has fired Betsy. “Okay Betsy how about this. If I get a message from Carla saying that you’ve behaved well today and come back from your break on time, I will let you go to college on your own and from there we can talk about you going to work on your own” Lisa tells the teenager trying to offer a compromise.

“I accept your offer. Now let’s go in, can’t keep your precious Carla waiting” Betsy sarcastically remarks walking into the factory with her mum following behind.

As much as the teenager’s sarcasm wasn’t appreciated, Lisa secretly enjoys the moments where she and Betsy feel like a normal mother and daughter. Not two individuals who suffer from the same grief. She also secretly enjoyed seeing Carla. Although she tries to burry that feeling. She’s not ready to let someone in again. Not someone who can freely walk in and out of her life as much as they please. Not that Lisa thinks Carla would do that. She’s just so afraid to lose someone she cares about again.

“DS Swain always a pleasure to see you” Sean one of the workers at the factory says. Lisa has had to speak to him a few times. Mostly as DS Swain. His son was part of Mason’s gang. The same Mason her daughter Betsy framed. “Hello, DS Swain” Sean repeated himself again. Hearing her name pulls her out of her spiral of overthinking.

“Sorry Sean was lost in my own little world there. And call me Lisa. I’m off duty today.” Lisa says trying to make an effort with the locals. She doesn’t want everyone to think she’s just some heartless copper that gets their loved ones arrested.

“Okay then Lisa, I’ve come to tell you that Carla isn’t in at the moment. Off on some meeting or something. Sarah wouldn’t tell me. I’m assuming that’s why your still here with Betsy already working at her desk and everything.”

Lisa hadn’t even noticed that the teenager had moved from by her side.

“Right yes thank you. Tell Carla I said hi then would you” Lisa says while turning to leave, her smile faltering. Without Betsy or Carla to talk to, Lisa had absolutely no idea what to do with her day off. In fact, she can’t remember the last time she willing had a day off. Since the passing of Becky Lisa has worked at every given opportunity. She couldn’t allow her mind to rest because that just made her think of Becky and that made her sad. Lisa hated feeling sad because feeling sad meant be vulnerable and being vulnerable was one of Lisa Swain’s biggest fears.

Carla has been working for what feels like 10 years in the space of one day. The day was off to a bad start when she walked into the factory and listened to a voicemail stating that one of her meetings had been bought forward. She missed her morning conversation with Lisa which she had begun to look forward to every morning. The only upside to the day was the quick 30 seconds text conversation with Lisa stating that Betsy was on perfect behaviour and was leaving to go to college. Carla looks at the time and realises that its 2pm. She hasn’t eaten since 7am this morning. Using food as an excuse, Carla takes a break from work and heads to Roy’s café for a ‘ketchup sandwich’. She smiles as she thinks of the nickname Lisa has given her food choices.

“Hi, could I get a latte please” Lisa’s head turns towards the door as the bell sounds “Oh and one of your finest ketchup sandwiches as well” she states smiling at Carla.

“Well, aren’t you funny” Carla retorts struggling to hide her smile. “I’ll go find us a table then Lisa, shall I?” Carla said slightly worried that Lisa wasn’t actually inviting her to stay.

“No need, everything is ready. You can find a table together” Roy says.

Carla and Lisa both walk over to a free table. Lisa sips her coffee while Carla takes a bite of her food. A comfortable silence fills the air. Both to scared to break it and say something they might regret.

“Did you know people normally talk to each other when they are at the same table” Shona, who also works at the café, says while walking past the two to get ready for her shift.

“Can’t get a bit of privacy round her these days. If I want to sit in silence, I’ll sit in silence” Carla huffed causing Lisa to laugh.

“Bad day at work? You seem a bit tense” Lisa questioned hoping to be able to get Carla to open up.

“Don’t even get me started on work. Had a complete nightmare today” Carla moaned. “Feels weird you asking me if I’m okay, normally the other way around. Not that that’s a bad thing obviously. We all need help sometimes” Carla starts rambling. Nervous that she might have said something to upset Lisa. “I’ve shot myself in the foot haven’t I. You probably don’t want to talk to me for the rest of the day. I get it. I can talk myself into trouble a lot. I don’t know if you’ve realised” the anxiety flowing through Carla as she spoke.

“Are you finished” says Swain in a light-hearted manner.

Carla looks up removing her gaze from Lisa’s coffee cup. To her surprise Lisa had a smile on her face.

“You ramble when you’re nervous. Did you know that?” Lisa said in the same affection tone as before. Carla didn’t need to know that Lisa found her nervous rambling adorable. “Anyways let me be a friend to you, tell me about your bad day” Lisa reaches out for Carla’s hand; hoping the physical affection brings Carla as much comfort as it brings to her.

“As much as I’ve enjoyed you guys being here like all day, you’re going to have to leave. It’s closing time” Shona says to Lisa and Carla. The pair had been their all afternoon completely losing track of time.

“You are joking right? Oh my. I’ve completely forgotten to go back to work” Carla says frustrated with herself quickly offering Sarah a quick apology via text message.

“Good thing you’re the boss then hey” Shona says in reply.

Walking out of the café Lisa couldn’t help but feel guilty.

“I’m sorry I kept you from work”

“Hey, that is not your fault. I was their willingly. You didn’t tie me to a chair or anything”

“I still feel bad”

“Right, that’s enough of that. Join me for a drink? I’ve enjoyed your company today” Carla inwardly cringed at herself hoping that she did not sound too flirty. She didn’t want to scare Lisa away. Lisa checked her phone seeing that Betsy was out seeing a friend and was asking if it was okay if she was back home late giving Lisa the perfect excuse to stay out.

“I could spare a couple more hours” she said to Carla.

“Your lying! There is absolutely no way that happened” Lisa giggled taking another sip of red wine. This must have been about her third glass. She hasn’t felt this relaxed in ages. She has Carla to thank for that.

“Okay, okay I’m lying. Can’t believe you didn’t believe that I used to juggle to help me sleep at night.” Carla could get used to making Lisa laugh. It was like music to her ears.

“I need to thank you for today, Carla. I was seriously dreading my day off. Having no idea what to do with myself”

“You absolutely do not need to thank me. Believe it or not I enjoy spending time with you.”

“I don’t know why anyone enjoys spending time with me. I’m broken. I’m a mess. I’m…” Carla reaches out and touches Lisa’s arm bringing her some comfort.

“You’re a brilliant mum, a brilliant detective and you’re quickly becoming a brilliant friend. You need to cut yourself some slack Lisa. The sooner you realise how great you are the better”

Lisa looks into Carla’s eyes with a look of appreciation. It was clear that Lisa needed to hear that. The next step was getting Lisa to believe how great she was herself. Lisa went to speak; apologise for any hostile behaviour she may have shown Carla the tourist comments fresh in her mind but was cut off by her phone ringing. It was Betsy.

“Hi mum, I don’t know where you are. Kinda assumed you would be home, but I don’t have my key. I’m locked out so if you could get home soon that would be lovely”.

“Okay Betsy I’m on my way. I’ve had quite a bit to drink so I’m going to need to get a taxi. We will have to get one to the factory tomorrow as well so I can pick up my car”.

“I’ve ordered the taxi for you” says Carla, trying to be helpful for her friend hiding her disappointment that she had to leave.

“Are you with Carla?” Betsy asked. Not sure how to feel that her mum has been with Carla all day and now all night. Her mum had promised her that nothing was going on between them but now. Now she wasn’t so sure. She also wasn’t sure how to feel about it either.

“Yes, I was with Carla, look Betsy the taxi’s almost here. Bye Carla. I’ll see you at home Betsy. Love you”

“Love you mum” And Betsy wasn’t sure what mum she was talking to.

Chapter Text

The next morning Lisa wakes up in agony. Her whole-body aches. She doesn’t want to get up for work today. She wished she had another day off. Another day to sit and talk with Carla. She smiles as she thinks back to yesterday. As much as it scares her, Lisa knows that she can’t hide herself away forever. Not while she’s friends with Carla anyway. Carla allows Lisa to be Lisa and not DS Swain. Lisa knows she’s been hiding behind the façade of DS Swain for too long. Maybe Carla was right. Maybe Lisa needs to cut herself some slack.

Dragging her body out of bed, Lisa heads to the bathroom. If she was going to turn her life around, she needed to check her bruises were healing properly. She’s not told anyone how she got these bruises. In fact, she’s not told anyone she’s hurt. Turning around so her back is facing the mirror, Lisa can see that bruises have not started to heal yet. They were still big and painful, and her ribs were still causing her some issues. She didn’t know how much longer she could hide this secret away from everyone. But she had to try. She couldn’t get in trouble.

“Mum, I’ve been calling for ages. Have you seen where my headphones…” Betsy barges into her mum’s bathroom; cutting herself off when she sees her mums back. Worry fills the teenagers face.

“Betsy you can’t just come in here. You need to knock!” Lisa says slightly more aggressive than she meant. Clearly panicked that her daughter has seen her in this state.

“Mum what the hell happened” Betsy said in a soft tone. She’s never seen her mum like this before. If Betsy was being honest, it’s freaking her out. She knew what job her mum had and from experience she knows that her mum isn’t invincible but seeing her mum covered in bruises was a complete shock.

Lisa seemed to recognise the panic across Betsy’s face. She knew she couldn’t tell her daughter the truth. She needed to come up with an excuse and fast. “It was just from a gym class darling. Paired with a partner double my size. Nothing to worry about. Promise”. Lisa offered a sympathetic smile pleading that the teenager would believe her.

“Right, okay. Well, you can’t go to work like that you need to rest”

“Honey, I’m going to work. Can’t take a day off because of some bruises. That would get me laughed out of a job. Honestly, I’m okay. Stop worrying. Now what was so important you had to come in my bathroom for” Lisa tried changing the subject, silently begging that the teenager would let it go.

“Oh yeah, I wanted to know if you knew where my headphones were. I haven’t got work today so I wanted to go meet a mate before college”

“And what mate would this be?”

“If I tell you, you can’t stop me from going”

“Its Mason isn’t it” Lisa says. Not needing her daughter to confirm that she was going to see the ex-convict.

“Look mum, I know you don’t like him but he’s a good friend. And besides, it’s not like I’ve been the best person to him either”

“Okay, I can’t stop you from hanging out with him. It’s your life. Your mistakes to make. Just promise me you aren’t going to be committing any crimes”

“I can’t tell if your serious or not mum. Of course, we won’t be committing and crimes. Thought you were a believer in rehabilitation. Are you saying Mason couldn’t have possibly changed” The teenager questioned. Her gaze was caught on a bottle of pain killers dated 28th September. She made a mental note to talk to her mum about them later.

“Okay, you’ve got me there. Just be careful yeah?” Lisa said. Just thankful that Betsy has let the subject of the bruises go. She’s not sure what she would do if Betsy found out the real cause of the bruises.

Betsy and Mason have stopped to sit on a park bench. Sitting side by side they were deep into conversation. Topics just flowing between them so easy. Betsy felt like she could talk about anything when she was with Mason. She could talk about her frustrations, her worries and most of the time it helped her.

“I’m worried about my mum” Betsy turns towards Mason. “She’s got a bunch of bruises, cracked ribs. I’ve never seen her that bad before”

“Well did you ask her? What did she say?” Mason replied.

“Said she got them from the gym”

“Well, there you go then. Quit worrying”

“Nah. You don’t get messed up like that cause of the gym. She’s lying to me”

“She is a copper. Probably got hurt on duty and didn’t want to tell ya. You know the people round here. Robbers, druggies, plenty of people to get in a fight with”

“Yeah, yeah your probably right” but Betsy wasn’t so sure. She remembers back to the date of the painkillers. “Mason, you know when you were questioned by the police, when did they say Joel was killed”

“September 27th, why?”

“No reason.” Betsy’s heart sunk. Her mum couldn’t have, could she? Her mum wouldn’t do that would she? No, she wouldn’t. Her mum was a police officer. She did everything by the book. But for some reason, Betsy just couldn’t shake this bad feeling.

“Look Betsy, I’ve got to go yeah but talk to your mum. She’s the only one that can give you answers”

Betsy stayed seated on the bench. Her mind going a million miles an hour. Whatever happened, it was complicated. Complicated enough for her mum not to report it. And that was what was worrying her. There was no way she was going to be able to focus at college today but she picked herself off the bench and headed towards the direction of the college. She didn’t need her mum worrying about her. She also needed her mum’s trust. She needed to giver herself a fighting chance to find out the truth. If her mum was in trouble she wanted to know. She wanted to help. She couldn’t lose another mum. She just couldn’t. Not again.

Chapter Text

Betsy had the worst day at college. She couldn’t concentrate at all. Her mind was racing over the different ways her mum could have obtained those bruises. The most rational was that she got into a fight due to a criminal resisting arrest, but Betsy just couldn’t shake the sinking feeling. The feeling telling her that her mum was involved in Joel’s murder. Without even thinking Betsy was making her way to the factory. This place had become a second home to her. Somehow the factory became a safe place for her. A place that offers comfort. And Betsy could really do with some comfort right now. She walked through the doors and was immediately met with her boss’s face. It was clear that Carla was about to leave.

“Betsy love what are you doing here, you aren’t scheduled to work today” Carla said confused at the teenager’s random appearance. Betsy has never turned up on a day off before.

“I needed to clear my head. I – I didn’t know where else to go” Betsy said, tears filling her eyes.

A look of panic quickly flashes across Carla’s face. She’s become very fond of the Swain family the more she has got to know them. Carla hoped that nothing bad had happened to Betsy. For such a young age, Betsy has been through so much already. “Betsy, come to my office we can talk there” Carla says taking her jacket back off ensuring that the teenager was following behind her.

Once in her office Carla sits on the sofa gesturing for Betsy to do the same. She didn’t want to sit at the desk. That would feel like an interview or worse like an interrogation. Carla needed Betsy to feel as comfortable as possible so that the teenager would open up to her. “So, Betsy, what’s up. Clearly, you’ve got something on your mind” questioned Carla.

“I don’t even know where to start” Betsy managed to choke out, tears beginning to fall down her face.

“Start wherever, I’ll put the pieces together” Carla reassured her, pulling her into a hug. “No rush.” Carla held Betsy until the tears began to slow down.

“I’m worried about my mum. She’s lying to me. She won’t tell me anything. I’m worried she’s done something bad. Like something really bad” Betsy began to get emotional again.

Carla was confused. “What do you mean. Why are you worried about your mum?” Carla felt bad for asking questions while Betsy was this emotional, but she needed answers. What could Lisa have possibly done to make her daughter worry this much.

“She erm she has these bruises. Like really bad bruises. All across her back. Oh, and her ribs are all bruised as well. She told me she got them from a gym class. Like police training or something. But Carla – Sorry Ms Connor you don’t get bruises like my mum has from something like that” Despite how upset she was, Betsy still wanted to be respectful to her boss correcting herself quickly when she called her by her first name.

“We aren’t working, you can call me Carla love.” Carla said wanting to make Betsy feel comfortable during this difficult conversation. “So, your just worried about these bruises because Betsy your mums a police officer she’s going to get hurt all the time. You’ve just probably never noticed before” Carla tried to offer a rational explanation to Lisa Swain’s bruises.

Betsy shakes her head. “That’s not all.” Carla waited for Betsy to continue. She didn’t want to assume anything. She needed to hear facts. She didn’t want to jump to conclusions.

“Mum has some painkillers. For the bruises and stuff” Betsy took a deep breath before continuing. “They are dated from the 28th September.”

“I’m not following Betsy. Why does that date matter”

“Joel was murdered on the 27th and I overheard Kit Green saying that Joel was in a fight before he died”

“Your worried your mum had something to do with Joel’s death” Carla said. The pieces falling into place. She didn’t know what to say. Lisa wouldn’t have, would she? But who knows what a parent would do when their kid is in danger. Carla could see why the teenager was so troubled now.

“She won’t tell me the truth Carla. But she listens to you. She talks to you. She’s more like her old self when she’s with you. Please talk to her. Try to get her to tell you what happened. I don’t need protecting. If something bad is happening, I deserve to know. Please Carla. Please can you do that for me.” The desperation was clear in Betsy’s voice. Carla didn’t want to promise anything to Betsy. Lisa might not tell her anything. And even if she did Carla shouldn’t be the one to tell Betsy the truth. That should be Lisa.

“I’ll talk to your mum. I can’t promise she will tell me anything. And I’m not going to push too far. I would quite like to keep my friendship with your mum. I do promise that I will try my best though”

“Thank you, Carla,” Betsy wiped her tears, gave Carla a quick hug and then headed for the doors. “I better head home before mum worries” she clarified sensing that Carla was worried about her.

“Text me if you need me Betsy” Carla told the teenager.

As soon as Betsy was out of site Carla allowed herself to panic. Lisa Swain what have you done she thought. She needed to find Lisa. She needed to know the truth straight away. If Lisa was in trouble, she wanted to help. Carla pulls out her phone and texts Lisa. ‘My flat now.’ She hoped that message was clear enough.

There was a frantic knock at Carla’s door.

“Do you normally, knock like that. You’d end up making your knuckled bleed” Carla offered sarcastically knowing it was Lisa at her door.

“Are you okay? You look okay. Your message scared me” Lisa ignored Carla’s comment walking into the flat and standing by the kitchen counter.

“I’m fine. The question is are you fine” Carla said sternly.

“Me? I’m good. Why? Why do you ask?” Lisa tried to keep her cool. She didn’t know what to think when she got that ominous message from Carla, but she definitely didn’t expect this.

“Cut the crap Lisa. I know about the bruises”

The bluntness from Carla shocked Lisa. Her face falling for a split second before regaining her composure. “I don’t know what you’re talking about Carla”

“Come on Lisa, you do know who you’re talking to right. I’m not going to judge you” Carla paused not sure whether to continue with her sentence hoping she doesn’t cross a line “Betsy is really worried about you and from what she’s told me I’m really worried about you too” Carla hoped that by being honest with Lisa that she might be honest back.

The mention of Betsy’s name seemed to make the façade drop and Carla could see how worried Lisa looked. It was like all the tension Lisa was carrying with her dropped in an instant. “I didn’t mean for any of this to happen. I don’t want Betsy to worry. I was just trying to do my job” Lisa breaks down begging to sob. Carla rushes over and embraces Lisa into a tight hug causing the detective to flinch.

“Sorry, in quite a bit of pain this evening.”

“I’m sorry. I forgot your bruises were on your back. Let’s move this to the couch. Be more comfortable than just standing up” Carla offered when she wasn’t making any progress trying to subtly hint to Lisa to sit down. The pair moved towards the sofa with Carla keeping an arm on Lisa’s shoulder at all times. Lisa defiantly needed comforting right now. “Want to explain what happened. I think it will help you to get it off your chest. No judgment remember. I mean I’ve not been the most perfect human in all my years of living so who am I to judge” Carla hoped by reminding Lisa of her past run-ins with the law would make it easier for her to open up. So, she doesn’t feel like she’s being told off or worse feels like she’d be reported for whatever she says.

“I keep replaying the events in my head over and over again. I was off duty. I should have waited for back up. I just-, at that point in time, I didn’t care whether I got hurt or not. I know that’s bad to say. And my mindset these last few weeks have changed thanks to you and Betsy. Now I just keep replaying what I would have done differently”

Carla looked at Lisa sympathetically. Lisa was so broken. It was clear to see now. Carla couldn’t believe she didn’t see the signs before. Too wrapped up in her own mind trying to understand her feeling for Lisa. Carla nodded at Lisa to continue reassuring the detective that she was still listening.

“There was a sighting of Joel, so I went to check it out. I saw him getting into a car and I shouted at him multiple times. Yelling at him to stop and get out of the vehicle. That’s when I heard the engine start. Joel didn’t reverse. He drove the car right into me” Lisa lifted her head up staring at the ceiling, trying to fight back the tears that were forming in her eyes. Carla was startled by the confession. Lisa had been run over. She couldn’t believe what she was hearing.

“Why didn’t you report him? He committed a crime. All you did was follow a lead off duty. You wouldn’t have got in trouble for that would you?” Carla questioned ensure of the rules the police had to follow.

“That’s not all I did” Lisa whispered feeling ashamed.

“There’s more?” Carla got the clarification she needed when Lisa nodded her head in reply. Lisa wasn’t sure if she could trust her voice at the moment, knowing she could burst into tears at any moment. Lisa took a deep breath. She had sworn she wasn’t going to tell anyone about this. Carla was special though. For some weird reason Lisa trusts Carla. She trusts Carla with her life which this secret could ruin her life. Or at the very least ruin her career.

“I hit him” Lisa said so quietly Carla wasn’t sure if she heard correctly.

“What”

“I hit him” Lisa said louder. “With my baton. Repeatedly”
Carla moved closer to Lisa. Offering her arms out so Lisa could get herself into a comfortable position. Carla didn’t want to cause her more pain by pressing on one of her bruises again. Lisa accepted the gesture and laid on Carla immediately feeling safe in Carla’s arms.

“I still don’t get why you didn’t report it”

Lisa and Carla were so swept in conversation that they didn’t notice the door open and Ryan walk in. And they definitely didn’t notice that he had company.

“I hit him so many times. I couldn’t believe what I had done. Thought it could have crossed over the line and into police brutality. This job means everything to me. I didn’t want to lose it. Joel seemed fine when he drove away”

Ryan’s eyes went wide. He whispered to Daisy next to him “you can get your stuff tomorrow. Forget you heard any of that yeah? We don’t know the context.” He pushes Daisy out of the flat and slams the door in her face. He needed to make his presence known before Lisa said anything else incriminating.

“Lisa nice to see you. I’ll be in the bathroom. Don’t let me interrupt you” Ryan quickly sprinted to the bathroom and leaned against the door seeing if he could hear the rest of the conversation.

“I should go” Lisa said sitting up out of Carla’s grasp.

“Finish what you were going to say first” Carla offered, silently pleading that Lisa would.

“Joel left, I just assumed he did what he told me he was going to do. He told me he was going to commit suicide. And well I can’t speak up now can I. Suspect number 1 DS Swain. That’s not a good look. Betsy can’t lose both her mums in the space of three years. I wouldn’t be able to live with myself”

“Betsy isn’t going to lose you. I will do everything in my power to make sure you stay here with us” Carla went red with her slip up. Cursing at herself. Why did she have to say with us. Lisa was dealing with so much already.

Lisa gave a small smile. “Thank you. I needed this. Now all I need is an alibi” Lisa joked.

“You know I would give you one in a heartbeat”

“That’s not how the law works Carla”

“Some laws can be broken when needed though. Just think about it yeah. If it ever comes to it do not hesitate to say you were with me”

“I appreciate the offer. I’ll think about it”

“No, you won’t” Carla laughed. “You do need to talk to Betsy about this though. Maybe not about the hitting Joel part. But you need to tell her about the bruises. She was on the verge of a panic attack how worried she was about you today. She thought there was a possibility you could have killed Joel”

“I’ll talk to her. I promise” Lisa stood up off of the couch. “I’ve got to go. Thanks again”

“It’s no problem. Remember about my offer of an alibi. There’s no cameras round here so they wouldn’t be able to fact check you walking in or out”

“Bye Carla” Lisa called out as she shut the door. She’s so hoping she won’t have to lie to the police and give a false alibi.

Ryan came out of the bathroom looking sheepish. He couldn’t believe what he had heard. DS Swain could be a suspect in the murder of Joel Deering. He walked into the kitchen seeing that Carla had poured herself a large glass of red wine. Looking up Carla could see Ryan’s pale face.

“You look like you’ve seen a ghost. Heard what we were talking about then.” Carla takes a big sip of wine while Ryan nods his head.

“You know I would back your story right. Lisa came here and stayed until she realised, she had to be home for Betsy. She went home about 1am”

Carla smiled at her nephew thankful that he was on bored with her idea. “Love you Ry”

“Love you too”

Meanwhile at the pub Daisy sits upstairs waiting for Kit to come home.

“Kit about time! I’ve been waiting ages for you”

“Why” Kit asked deadpan in response.

“I think I have a lead for your Joel Deering case”

Chapter Text

Lisa woke up feeling refreshed. She’s not felt this good waking up in a long time. Carla was right it was good to get everything off of her chest. She had been carrying the guilt around with her for too long now. All she has to do now is tell Betsy a twisted version of the truth. The teenager was already asleep in bed by the time that Lisa got home last night. She went downstairs and boiled the kettle wanting her usual morning coffee. She could hear movement upstairs. Betsy must be awake. She pulled another mug out from the cupboard. No time like the present to tell Betsy what happened.

“Hi love, how did you sleep” Lisa said handing Betsy a cup of coffee.

“Not great mum, if I’m being honest, I was too worried about you”

“I’m really sorry, you don’t deserve the stress by job brings on you”. Lisa was cut off by her phone ringing. It was the station. Lisa couldn’t understand why they were ringing now. She wasn’t due in for work until another 2 hours. She also had plenty of missed messages from her DI Castello.

“Sorry Betsy I should probably take this; I promise to tell you everything directly after the call okay” Lisa calls back Castello. “Station now. Or I’ll have Kit round to arrest you”

“Arrest me? What are you talking about”

“I want you down at the station to answer some questions. All voluntary of course”

“Not very voluntary if you’re threatening to arrest me”

“Station DS Swain” DI Castello hung up not letting Lisa get another word in. Dread filled Lisa. Did Carla report her to the police. She promised she wouldn’t. Surely it wasn’t Carla. Could it have been Ryan. Could he have overheard their conversation. But Lisa didn’t think Ryan would report her either.

“Mum what was that. It sounded serious” Betsy said visibly worried.

“I’ll explain it all later. I promise. I have to go to the station”

“Are you in trouble”

“I don’t know. If and I mean if I get stuck at the station for a long time. Carla will explain everything to you. Everything will be okay. Promise” but Lisa wasn’t so sure. She just didn’t want her daughter worrying anymore than she needed to.

“Lisa Swain if you’d like to follow me into an interview room. Remember this is voluntary and you a free to leave anytime” Kit Green stated trying to hide his smirk. Lisa followed him into the room putting on a cold exterior. She takes a deep breath. She has hided behind DS Swain for the past three years she knows how to repress her emotions. She sits down staring at Kit while he states all the official data and important information so that the interview could be recorded and logged onto the records.

“So, Ms Swain, late last night we received a report from an anonymous source. They stated that you were with Joel Deering on the night he died, care to explain” DC Green tried to be direct hoping to catch Lisa off guard but not a splash of emotion came across her face. It was like she was a robot.

“Is this an official interview. Do I have to give you an answer. You’ve not been very clear DC Green. You are meant to explain what you’re expecting before asking questions” Lisa smugly replied.

“Okay, you want to be direct. I can be direct. Depending on what you say or do not say I can have you arrested on suspicion of the murder of Joel Deering. Now I suggest you start answering my questions”

Lisa knows she’s in trouble. She knows she needs to cooperate. She also knows that she needs a solicitor. She’s been on the other end of this situation enough times to know better.

Once Lisa’s solicitor arrived, the interview continued.

“Where were you on the 27th of September at approximately between the hours of 10 – 11pm” Kit questioned.
“I was off duty, around the cobbles when I got a report about a sighting of Joel Deering. As I was around the area, I went to check it out. He was in a car. In the moment I didn’t call for backup. I should have I know”

“So, you admit to seeing Mr Deering on the night he was murdered”

“Yes”

“Okay was just checking, please continue your anecdote” Kit said in a snarky manor.

“I yelled at him to stop and get out of the car multiple times. He didn’t listen. He revved his engine and instead of reversing. He went straight into me”

“To be clear, he ran you over?”

“Yes”

“And what did you do afterwards”

“Well while I still had adrenaline, I picked myself up and went to go home but I had to stop and take a breather halfway down the street” Lisa took a deep breath. She couldn’t believe she was doing this. She couldn’t believe she was breaking the law. “That’s when Carla saw me from her flat window, dragged me inside and made me sit. Let me stay until I was well enough to go home”

“What did you tell her about your injuries”

“Just said it was a long day at work”

“And she didn’t question it”

“No, our friendship isn’t like that. We trust each other”

“What time did you leave”

“I don’t know the exact time. Around half 12 maybe? Got back home at 1:15 I remember that because I snuck into Betsy’s room to say goodnight to her. She was already asleep by the time I got home”

“Interesting”

Lisa could tell that Kit didn’t believe her but that was okay. He didn’t need to believe her. As long as Carla played along Lisa would be fine. And Betsy. Oh my God Betsy. She was going to be questioned as well. As soon as she gets out of here, she needs to tell Betsy everything.

“Your free to go Ms Swain. You’ve cooperated nicely. We will be in touch. Oh, and if it wasn’t clear before. Your suspended for the foreseeable future” Kit points to the door showing Lisa that he wanted her to walk out. Lisa didn’t need to be told twice. She left the police station and headed straight to the factory. She knew Betsy would be there she just hoped Carla would be too. Lisa desperately needed to speak to both of them.

Lisa pulled up to the factory. She knows she needs to be careful now. There are cameras everywhere. She knows Kit will be asking for footage trying to catch Lisa out in her lie. She walks towards Betsy’s desk and points toward Carla’s office making it clear to Betsy that she needed to talk to her. Lisa knocks on the door and smiles at Carla when she walks through.

“Oh, do you want the office. I can leave.” Carla offered.

“No no, stay please” Lisa begged. She places a notepad on Carla’s desk. She had prewritten a message on their not knowing if Carla’s camera’s recorded audio.

“No, the ones in my office don’t have audio, the rest of them do though so I suggest we keep our voices down. I can’t turn the cameras off. That would be suspicious”. Carla said after reading the notepad.

“Can someone please tell me what is going on” Betsy asked looking between the two adults. And so, Lisa told her everything. About how she got the bruises, how Joel ran her over. How she hit Joel and didn’t report it in fear of losing Betsy and her job. How she was just pulled in for questioning. And how she had lied. Said she was with Carla before coming home. She told them both in detail what she had told the police. How Carla didn’t press about the bruises. How she got home around 1:25 and went to say night to Betsy.

“What do I need to say when they question me” Betsy asked worried for her mum.

“Just the truth. I wasn’t home when you came in and you fell asleep before I came home. But you heard me open the door to your room and say goodnight. The only people that need to lie are me and Carla”

“And Ryan” Carla said. “He knows. He heard us talking last night. And anyway, he was home that night. We don’t have to worry about Bobby. He stayed over at a mate’s house that night.

“Ryan would do that for me” Lisa eyes softened. Overwhelmed by the support she is being shown. She wasn’t sure she would ever find a support system as good as this.

“We are here for you mum” Betsy says giving her mum a hug.

“Yeah, we’ve got your back” Carla seconded Betsy’s statement.

“Thank you, guys. Now that I’ve been suspended, I’ll have a lot of time on my hands. I’m going to find the real killer. That’s the only way I can save myself”

Lisa gave Betsy and Carla a final look before turning around. She had to act like she was just telling Betsy she was suspended and not implicating the two most important people in her life into a serious crime.

Chapter Text

The next morning was absolute hell for Lisa. She had to drop off Betsy at the station. She was called in early in the morning to give a statement. Lisa assumed that was DC Kit’s way of trying to catch the teenager off guard. Lisa couldn’t focus while Betsy was in there being questioned, frustrated with herself that she let it get to this point. She knew she didn’t kill Joel. She wished she didn’t have to lie but Lisa knew better than anyone that innocent people can get charged with crimes they didn’t commit. Betsy told her that her interview was okay. That she told the truth exactly like her mum asked her too. Worried that she couldn’t defend her mum in her statement at all. She said how smug Kit looked that she couldn’t give her mum an alibi during the whole approximate time of death window. Lisa was prepared for that. Carla and Ryan were her main alibi’s. She just had to hope they didn’t crack. She couldn’t believe that they were both prepared to lie for her. Lisa couldn’t believe that she meant that much to anyone. She dropped Betsy off at the factory and then headed back home. As much as she wanted to see Carla, she knew that was a bad decision. Besides, she had an investigation to start.

Carla was in her office when Kit and a uniformed office came in.

“Mind if we ask you a few questions”

“Well since your already here might as well” Carla sarcastically replied. She knew this was coming. They had already spoke to Ryan. He texted her about an hour ago to let her know that they had asked him to come down to the station. Betsy was also questioned at the station, so Carla was caught a little bit off-guard due to the fact that Kit was in her office in her factory.

“Where were you on the night of September 27th” Kit wanted to be direct. He wanted to make Carla as uncomfortable as possible. He needed there to be evidence on Lisa. He needed to pin this murder on someone. He needed to prove himself. Prove himself to everyone that he is a far superior detective; that he deserves to be higher ranked than a detective constable.

“I was at home with Ryan”

“Anyone else in the house. Your other nephew normally stays with you correct”

“Yes, but he was staying over at a mate’s house. Could I ask what this is about?”

“I’m the one asking the questions thank you. Was you at the house the whole night. Just you and Ryan?”

“No. I left to go turn the factory lights off. I wasn’t gone long. Only a couple of minutes”

“And that’s all that happened” Kit leaned in. He tried to supress a smile. There was no mention of DS Swain so far. If Carla’s statement didn’t match up with Ryan’s or Lisa’s, then he had enough evidence to build a case. The only thing he couldn’t work out at the moment was why would Ryan lie.

“Do you cut people off a lot? Thought the whole point of your job was to listen. I wasn’t done talking” Carla spat at Kit. She couldn’t help but be hostile towards him. Carla saw through his act. He was nothing but a spiteful, misogynistic man.

“Keep talking then” Kit said in response. His nice nature gone. He was frustrated that there was more. He could already sense where this interview was going, and he didn’t like it.

“Well, once I got back up to the flat me and Ryan were discussing what movie to watch. He put on some random movie. Don’t remember what it was but while he went to the bathroom I walked over to the window. I like watching the stars. Anyway, I saw Lisa, DS Swain sitting on the floor on the street. I went down to see if she was okay and bought her back up to my flat”

“Ryan wasn’t in the room when you left” Kit wanted to confirm. Ryan said he had just walked out of the bathroom when the door shut. There were inconsistences between the different statements. Not anywhere near enough inconsistences to deem that they were lying. No. It was more like there was enough inconsistences to believe that they were telling the truth. That these statements were true and not well rehearsed lies. This was extremely frustrating for Kit.

“No, he was in the bathroom like I said”

“Why did you bring Ms Swain up to your flat. What did you do? How long did she stay for?” Kit hoped that the frequent questions would cause a slip up.

“She was badly hurt. Said she was just badly injured while on duty. I know I’m not allowed to know about that stuff, so I didn’t ask anymore questions. As for what did we do, I gave her some painkillers and we watched the movie. That included Ryan just to be clear. Don’t want you twisting my words now do we”

“You didn’t say how long she stayed for”

“She stayed until the movie finished. I don’t know the exact time it’s not like I was staring at the clock. I went to get a glass of water straight after Lisa left. Clock on the oven said it was 12:30 something so Lisa would have left around 12:30-ish”

“And did she tell you when she got home”

“No”

“Are you sure” Kit was trying to make Carla believe that Lisa had told her she did.

“I’m sure. I would remember if I got a text message” Carla has been through this too many times to fall for a police officer’s tricks. She knew to never change her mind on anything she has said. It would only end up with her being in more trouble.

“Well thank you for your time, Ms Connor that is all” Kit left that interview angry. He was back to square one. He was going to need a new suspect and quick.

Back at the Swain residence, Lisa was struggling with her investigation. As she was suspended, she couldn’t risk going to the station for some help. She would have to do this on her own with the evidence she had already gathered. So far all she knows is that Joel was hit with a heavy object, most likely a crowbar, he was heard arguing with someone outside his flat and a red car fled the scene. There wasn’t much to work off.

Lisa put her head on her desk, groaning in frustration. Why was this so complicated. When Lisa was stuck during an investigation in the past she would talk to Becky. Not that she was always happy with the conclusions Becky offered. Lisa looked up to the ceiling. ‘I could really use your help right now you know. I’m in way over my head. I don’t know what to do’. Tears built up in her eyes. She couldn’t cry. Not now. Not when there was so much on the line. She took a deep breath hoping that she would be able to concentrate on the investigation. Bloody knuckles, crowbar, red car. Bloody knuckles, crowbar, red car. Bloody knuckles, crowbar, red car. The three key bits of information just repeating in Lisa’s mind. Red car. Who owns a red car. Her mind started to race. If she could find out who has a red car then maybe she could whittle down her list of suspects. Or grow her list of suspects she should say as there was currently no one on the list.

After some time of calling all the mechanics in the area, Lisa concluded that a lot of people own a red car. What she was able to find was that two people who live on the cobbles own a red car. Ronnie and DC Green. Lisa put them both on her notepad. She had to follow their movements on the nigh Joel died very carefully. At the moment her prime suspect was Ronnie. He’s related to Dee-Dee and therefore has a motive. Lisa has no idea why Kit Green would have murdered Joel. As far as she knows they had never even interacted before, but she is not ruling anybody out. From all the years on the job Lisa knows that anyone can be guilty. Anyone at all.

“Mum. I’m home!” Betsy shouted.

“In the living room” Lisa shouted back. She was still working on the case. Ronnie seemed to have a good alibi for now. Lisa couldn’t pick that apart just yet. She needed to wait until she was allowed back to work. Same with Kit. She wasn’t sure how she could question his movements without suspicion growing.

“You were meant to pick me up. How are you suspended but still too busy with work to notice me” Betsy stormed off upstairs, clearly hurt by how caught up in work Lisa got.

“I hope you don’t mind that I bought her home” Lisa heard a voice say from the doorway. She hadn’t even noticed that Carla was in her house. “I was going to bring some wine, but I wasn’t sure if you were allowed alcohol on the painkillers you’ve got” Carla said softly smiling at Lisa.

“I’m far too busy to have a wine break anyway” Lisa stated pointing at the work out in front of her.

Carla inched closer, sitting down on the couch next to Lisa. “You know you work far too hard. You should give yourself a break. Especially after the week you’ve had”

“I find it hard to switch off. When I’m not in work mode, when I’m Lisa and DS Swain, I find it too hard. Grief still overwhelms me. I can’t let Betsy see me like that. It hurts like hell knowing she thinks I don’t care about her though” Lisa honestly tells Carla. For some reason she feels like she can tell Carla anything.

Carla pulls her into a hug. Careful not to touch any of the painful bruises. “I will always be here for you Lisa, whenever you need me.”

Carla’s sincerity caused Lisa to break down. She cried into Carla’s arms. It was clear how broken Lisa was. How she hasn’t let herself get any help since the passing of her wife. Carla held her offering as much comfort as Lisa needed being careful not to cross the line and make Lisa uncomfortable.

Lisa allowed herself to be held for the first time in a long time. And she would be lying to herself if she didn’t say it felt good to be close to someone again. It felt good to be close to Carla.

Chapter Text

Lisa’s chat with Carla last night put a lot of things into perspective for her. It felt good to talk to someone and get a lot of thoughts and feelings off of her chest. As Lisa was still suspended, she decided to spend as much time with Betsy as she could. The Joel case could wait. It was clear over the last few years that her relationship with her daughter had broken down and it was partly her fault. She hasn’t been the best mum in the world, and it was time to make up for it. Lisa treated Betsy to a nice breakfast at Roy’s café and they had a meaningful conversation without arguing. Lisa couldn’t remember the last time that had happened. They were getting on so well and Lisa was a bit gutted when Betsy had to leave to go to work. Lisa was still in the café finishing up her drink from breakfast, scrolling through her phone when she saw an advert for the festival that Betsy had been raving on about all through breakfast. Tickets went on sale today. Lisa smiled knowing how happy her daughter would be if she managed to get those tickets.

“Roy, would you be able to do me a massive favour. The internet is down at mine, and I need Wi-Fi to buy these tickets for Betsy. Would I be able to stay here?”

“Of course. You can stay here as long as you need”

Sometime had past, and Lisa was still in the café. The tickets still hadn’t gone on sale. She had refreshed the page about a hundred times with each reload taking what seemed liked forever. The Wi-Fi wasn’t the best in the café, but it would have to do.

The bell sounded notifying everyone that the door had opened. Lisa looked up seeing that it was Carla who walked in and offered her a smile. Carla smiled back and then looked down at Lisa’s laptop”

“You’re not working again, are you?” Carla questioned; her voice laced with concern.

“No, no. I’m actually buying tickets to a festival”

“What, you at a festival? With your face painted and your hands waving around in the air” Carla sniggered. The picture of Lisa at a festival made her laugh. She couldn’t imagine her friend in such a freeing environment.

“Yeah, well Betsy really wants to go and I’m trying to rebuild our relationship. Not exactly been mother of the year over here so hoping this will begin to smooth things over” Lisa jokingly rolled her eyes at Carla struggling to hold back her own smile. She liked Carla’s laugh. She’s never heard Carla laugh before. She wants to her it more often.

“Well want to go somewhere else. I know somewhere with better Wi-Fi. No offence Roy” Carla called out to her father figure.

“Yeah okay. If your sure” Lisa replied.

“Want a coffee? You know what I’m just going to order two coffees and then we can go”

Lisa packed up her stuff making sure to keep her laptop on the festivals page while Carla was waiting for the coffees. Lisa forgot what it felt like to have people care for you. Maybe she should take time off work more often. She’s had a great day so far and it had only just begun. Lisa was brought out of her thoughts when Carla handed her, her coffee.

“Penny for your thoughts Detective?”

Lisa walked out the door eager to get back to a place with Wi-Fi. “Just that I’m having one of the best days I’ve had in a while”

“That’s good” Carla replied sincerely. She was really happy that Lisa was relaxing. She seemed so much more open and freer today. It was clear the job was really taking a toll on her. Carla couldn’t wait to get to know Lisa even more than she already did. She couldn’t help but admit that the detective intrigues her. There was just something so drawing about Lisa Swain.

Lisa and Carla had been having a great time talking in Carla’s office. Carla would be lying if she said she had gotten much work done but for some reason she just didn’t care. She was enjoying Lisa’s company so much.

“What’s going on. Why are you here?” Betsy’s voice broke the comfortable silence that had fell over Lisa and Carla.

“Your mum is here undercover. Trying to work out who keeps stealing all the biscuits. Go on, who’s your money on. I’m thinking Sally”

Lisa couldn’t help but laugh at Carla’s ridiculous response.

“Taking that means it’s none of my business then. And missing biscuits is obviously Kirk” Betsy retorts.

“I’ll tell you what you can do, go get us some lunch will. Lisa what do you want” Carla starts handing Betsy over some cash.

“Shouldn’t it be my turn to treat you?” Lisa questioned

“You can get it next time”

“Okay in that case I’ll have a Kebab. You know my usual order Betsy love”

“A Kebab? I was thinking more on the lines of sushi” Carla sounded disgusted at the detective’s food choices.

“A kebab is lovely. Trust me”

“Sure. I believe you. Get me some sushi still though please Betsy.” As much as Carla trusted Lisa there was no way she was having a kebab for lunch.

“Okay this is well weird” Betsy said. She could sense the strange flirting going on between her mum and her boss. There is no way Carla is straight like her mum keeps telling her. And yet she doesn’t feel mad like she did a few months ago.

Betsy was gone for about 20 minutes when Lisa finally got onto the website for the festival tickets.

“I’ve got the tickets! I’ve got the tickets!” Lisa practically shouted she was so excited.

“Yes! You and Betsy are going to have a lovely time I’m sure of it”

“Thank you, Carla. Oh, come here!” Lisa stretches out her arms inviting Carla for a hug. Carla took the offer in a heartbeat immediately swarming Lisa into a bear hug.

“Ow my back” Lisa immediately flinched; Carla moved her hand lower down to avoid the bruises on Lisa’s back.

“Ow the ribs, the ribs” Lisa pulled away from the hug. Clearly, she wasn’t healed enough for physical contact yet. Carla’s hand hovered by Lisa’s ribs. She knew she couldn’t touch Lisa without causing her pain. She was just craving physical contact with the detective. Carla knew why. She wasn’t an idiot. Ryan was right. She was falling for Lisa Swain, and she was falling hard.

“Sorry about that. Thank you again though Carla. Seriously. You’re such a good mate”

Carla would be lying if she said it didn’t hurt being called mate by Lisa again. She just hoped it didn’t show on her face. She didn’t want to jeopardise her friendship with Lisa again because in all honesty Lisa was such a good friend. Probably the best friend Carla has had in years.

Chapter Text

Kit was having a bad day. DI Castello was on his back about the Joel Deering case. He had no leads, no evidence, no one to pin the crime on. He thought he had Lisa Swain banged to rights. He would have made headlines. DC Green arrests and convicts his superior officer for the murder of Joel Deering. Castello would have had to have given him a premotion. His life would have been so good. But DS Swain and her stupid alibis had to go and ruin it all. He needed a new suspect and fast.

To make matters even worse Ryan was content in ruining his plans with Daisy. Ryan told Daisy all about him fleecing him for information and now Daisy doesn’t want to speak with him. Kit doesn’t even see how that was his fault. If Ryan was dumb enough not to see he was being used, then why should that be his problem.

Kit walks upstairs into the house part of the pub. He needed to finish packing up some last few bits. He was moving out today; slightly relieved that he can work on his investigation in peace.

“Your back early”

Kit turned around. It was Daisy.

“Only worked half a day. Needed the rest of the day to move out. Don’t worry, I’ll be out of your way soon” Kit was not in the mood for Daisy’s sarcasm. Best to shut it down early.

“What’s your problem? I thought we were getting on well”

“Yeah, well you clearly thought wrong didn’t you” Kit spat back at Daisy. She recoiled from Kit’s harsh tone. She thought they were friends. Maybe even had the potential to be even more than friends. She wasn’t expecting to be treated like this.

“I stuck my neck out for you, reporting Swain. You should be more thankful you know”

“I never asked you to do that did I. Did that by your own free will” Kit said with the same harsh tone as before.

Daisy walked over to the door and shut it. It was clear that there was something wrong with her new friend and she was going to figure out what it was. “What’s wrong Kit”

“None of your business now move out of the way”

“No”

“I mean it. Move”

“Not until you tell me what’s wrong”

“MOVE”

Daisy moved away from the door. Concern laced her face. She had never seen Kit that angry before. It was like he was going to physically move her away from the door if he had to. Kit’s heart sank into his chest. He had let his façade drop. He needed to fix it and fast.

“Daisy I’m so sorry. I’m just stressed. I shouldn’t take it out on you. I’m sorry”

“Just go Kit. I don’t want to see you right now”

And so, Kit left. He hoped by doing what Daisy had asked he’d be able to get back on her good side later. Daisy was one of the only allies he had left in Weatherfield. He couldn’t afford to lose her trust. Not with everything on the line.

Daisy was working a shift at the pub. Although she wasn’t doing much work. In fact, she was doing more gossiping with Ryan than actual work.

“Don’t you think it’s weird though Ryan. He just snapped out of nowhere. I was only asking if he was okay”

“Well, I don’t trust him anyway so not sure you’re asking the right person here. Slightly biased”

“Come on Ryan. I have no-one else to talk to about his”

“Okay, okay. Yes, I think it’s weird how he snapped at you. But I also think he’s a manipulative person anyway so just be careful please Daisy”

“You were right. Completely biased opinion”

Ryan rolled his eyes. “Look, you could put it down to his grief over his brother. But if you ask me that’s slightly naive. He’s not trustworthy. He’s shown that before Paul died as well as after. And I’m not being funny he talks down to his superior officer all of the time. I’m honestly surprised Swain hasn’t reported him yet”

“The same superior officer that clearly doesn’t like him. The same superior officer that let me and you down Ryan. I mean if the police had done their jobs properly then maybe the acid attack would never have happened” Daisy’s voice was full of emotion. She didn’t know if she should listen to Ryan. She felt bad for bringing up a traumatising time for him as well.

“DS Swain was following police protocol. And if you actually had a conversation with her, you would realise that she carries around a lot of guilt for what happened. She feels like she let us down. Believe me I would know, she’s always with Carla. The same Carla that hated her for wrongly arresting Roy. You must wonder how they are such good friends after everything. Well, I can tell you the answer Daisy. DS Swain is a good person. If she doesn’t trust Kit, then I would be careful. One last thing, the only person who is to blame for what happened to me and you is Justin. No-one else” Ryan finished off his passionate talk. He was hoping to finally get through to Daisy.

“You really trust DS Swain’s judgment. Even after everything?”

“I do”

“Okay. I’ll be careful around Kit then”

“Thank you, that’s all I ask Daisy”

“Can you go behind the bar. I just need to go upstairs and freshen up” Ryan hadn’t realised but at some point, during his monologue Daisy had started crying.

“Yeah of course, go”

Daisy walked up the stairs in the backroom of the pub. She needed to go into the bathroom and remove the mascara that was beginning to run. As she got to the top of the stairs, she realised the door was shut which was very unusual. They never ever shut the door unless there was a private conversation happening. As far as Daisy new Jenny was out so she was confused as to why the door was shut. That was until she begun to hear Kit’s voice. What was he still doing here? He was supposed to have fully moved out by now. Just as Daisy reached for the handle to open the door Kit dropped a bombshell to whoever was on the other end of the phone.

“I don’t know what you want me to do. I have no one to frame”

Frame? Why would Kit want to frame someone. And more importantly what did Kit want to frame someone for. Daisy could have sworn the only case he has at the moment is the Joel Deering case. Surely, he’s not planning on setting someone up for murder.

“Help me find someone. I am not going down for this. I mean it”

Daisy can not believe what she has just heard. The bloke she had thought was charming and funny, one of the good guys, has committed a crime. A crime big enough to need to cover it up. Daisy had a bad feeling about this. She needed to tell someone. Daisy ran down the stairs, shouting to Ryan that it was an emergency and that she needed to go. Daisy knew exactly where she needed to go. The police station. That was until she saw DS Swain out the corner of her eye. Maybe Ryan was right. Maybe she needed to start to trust the DS again. No better time than the present.

“DS SWAIN” Daisy shouted across the street, running towards the detective sergent. “I need your help. I’ve overheard something. I think it could be something potentially seriously bad”

“Daisy I’m really sorry but I’m on my way to meet Betsy. Is there any way this can wait?”

“What like you did with Justin? You’ve failed me once DS Swain. Please, please, please don’t fail me again” Daisy felt bad bringing up Justin. Ryan had mentioned how guilty Swain felt about Justin, but Daisy needed that guilt to work in her favour. If the DS really felt that bad, then she would want to help Daisy now. Right?

“I am sorry about Justin you know. Sometimes I feel like I could have done more to help you”

Daisy was beginning to feel bad bringing him up. It was clear DS Swain was being sincere. “I’m sorry. Shouldn’t have bought him up. You were just following police protocol. You couldn’t have done much more really. I realise that now”

“Let’s go somewhere a little more private than the street hey. You said you had something important to tell me” Lisa Swain began to walk off gesturing for Daisy to follow her. They didn’t have to walk far. They only went to the café. Daisy wasn’t sure if that was anymore private but at least it wasn’t directly outside the pub where Kit could probably see.

“So, what did you want to tell me”

“I overheard Kit, sorry DC Green, talking to someone. I don’t know who and I couldn’t hear their responses, but I could hear DC Kit Green. He was talking about framing someone for something, or he was going to go down”

DS Swain was evidently shocked. As much as she didn’t like DC Green, she didn’t expect him to try and set someone up for a crime. And by the sounds of it a crime he either committed or was an accomplice to.

“I’m sorry Daisy but I’m still suspended. Theres nothing, I can do. You’re going to have to make an official report at the station. I just need to pick up Betsy and then I can drive you there if you want?” Lisa felt like she had to at least offer a lift. She didn’t want Daisy to feel as though she was letting her down again.

“No, it’s okay. I’ll make my own way there. Need to clear my head” Daisy began to get up, heading for the door. She forgot that DS Swain was suspended. That was all her fault. Guilt was beginning to eat away at Daisy. She almost got DS Swain locked up for a crime that Kit Green most likely committed.

“Daisy” DS Swain shouted out stopping Daisy from leaving so fast. “Mention the fact that Kit has a red car please. I think it’s important”

“Okay. I trust you.” Lisa smiled hearing those words from a person who was let down by the system. Maybe everything really was going to be okay.

Kit had waited for Daisy to come upstairs long enough. She was going to have to wait until tomorrow now. He didn’t have time for her mood swings.

Kit looked down at his phone. Several notifications coming through at once. Nando’s, H&M, DI Castello, Boots. Wait. What was DI Castello doing messaging him this time at night. Kit’s heart sank. His breathing rate increasing as he reads the message.

‘Station 7am or I send officers to get you’

Chapter Text

A police detective being accused of setting someone up was a big deal. Kit knew that. He wasn’t stupid. He was just thankful that it was he said she said. The police had 0 evidence of this phone call happening. Kit wasn’t dumb enough to use his actual phone and he certainly wasn’t dumb enough to keep his burner phone. As soon as he received that message from Castello yesterday, he destroyed that phone. Disposing of it all over town. He knew the best ways to dispose of evidence. He was a police detective after all. He was suspended for the day while they investigated. That was to be expected. Kit was confident the police weren’t going to find anything, and he would be back on the job tomorrow. Finding the Joel Deering murderer and getting that promotion he deserved. He was let go. Reminded that he wasn’t allowed to be at his house or the pub while the searched both places.

“Oi Tinker, I’ve got the day off today but check all those cameras for me again. Cheers” Kit said slapping PC Tinker on the back before walking off. Craig wondered if he had mug written on his forehead. Everyone at the station knows that Kit was suspended for the day. Gossip travels fast. Besides he had already checked those cameras thousands of times and had found nothing. There was no way he was doing anything for DC Green today.

The door to the station sounded. DS Swain walked in, walking straight towards Craig.

“Ah, PC Tinker. Just the person I wanted to see. I need your help with something”

“Do I need to remind you that your suspended”

“That’s exactly why I need your help” Lisa deadpanned. She thought that part was obvious. Maybe she’s going to have to do more explaining than she liked.

“I could get in trouble if I do this”

“I think it’s a risk willing to take”

“Okay. What do you need”

“There was a report of a man hearing 2 blokes arguing outside of Joel’s flat the night he died. Forensics checked the area and found red car paint scratched into the side of a silver car. The car had no wing mirror meaning that the red car most likely crashed into the silver car”

“I’m not following” PC Tinker admitted.

“I need you to check for any red cars that pass through that area. And send them to me”

“That’s against the rules. I’ll definitely get in trouble for that”

“Please it’s important”

“Okay, okay. Anything else?”

“Do not mention this to anyone. Especially to DC Green”

“Has this got something to do with why he was suspended?” Lisa gave Craig a stern look which translated to don’t ask anymore questions. Before Craig could say anything, else DS Swain was heading for the door. She was still suspended so there was no point hanging around the station. That would just make her look suspicious.

Lisa was at the factory having lunch with Carla when her phone vibrated. They had both decided to have the same lunch this time courtesy of Betsy stating that she didn’t want to witness another domestic. Lisa knew Betsy was only joking but she couldn’t help but smile when thinking about being domestic with Carla.

“Are you going to look at your phone. It’s buzzed like four times” Carla spoke bringing Lisa back to reality.

“Yeah sorry, was a bit distracted”

“Want to talk about it?”

“No, it’s okay. Thanks though. You’re always checking in on me. I appreciate it” Lisa said while picking up her phone. It was Craig. He had sent over all the red cars stating that he hadn’t looked through them. Lisa knew that was probably a lie.

“Carla, you’re going to kill me”

“Oh no what have you done now. Need any more alibis?”

“Haha. Very funny”

“Go on then. What is it?”

“I need to do some police work” Lisa said sheepishly. She had promised she would take a step back from work while she was suspended but she needed to check something. If what Daisy said last night was the truth, then whatever lies in the car reports could be very very important.

“Don’t let Betsy catch you. She’ll have a go at you for doing work”

“And you aren’t”

“Well, whatever it is, it must be important. I know how much your enjoying spending time with Betsy. You wouldn’t jeopardise that for some low-level case”

“Thanks Carla, you really are the best”

“Oh, I know”

Lisa bit her lip to try and stifle a laugh. She enjoyed Carla’s company. She couldn’t believe she tried to push Carla away.

Lisa hit her head on Carla’s desk. She had moved spots in Carla’s office about 50 times. She had one more page of cars to read through. PC Tinker forgot to inform her that he couldn’t sort the cars by colour and so Lisa has had to read through every car that had passed Joel’s Street on the night he died. Blue car, silver car, blue car, black car, white car, red car, black car, red car, green car, blue car, white car, red car. Only three more red cars. The first one was not useful again. Lisa skimmed back to the second to last red car. She moved her eyes across the row, passing the car registration number and over to the column that states the registered driver. Lisa let out a sigh of relief. She has got him. Christopher ‘Kit’ Green had passed through the night Joel had died. Lisa has a lead. She needed to chase this up now. If this has anything to do what Daisy had heard last night than Kit Green is dangerous, and he needs to be stopped.

“Carla, I have to go. Thanks again for lunch. Tell Betsy there was an emergency or something please. I hate to leave like this, but it is very important”

“Lisa, you don’t need to explain. I trust you. I’ll think of something to tell Betsy. Go on, go”

Lisa rushed out of the factory doors. In all honesty she had no idea what to do next. It wasn’t like she could bring Kit in for questioning. She guesses she would just have to go to the station and present all the evidence she has and hope that they will open an investigation into Kit. She definitely did not have enough evidence to arrest him at this moment in time.

“DS Swain” Daisy called out. She had seen the detective leaving Carla’s factory.

“Daisy, nice to see you”

“I reported Kit. He’s been suspended”

“Yes, I had heard they suspended him”

“He came round to the pub to speak to me. He was all smug, saying that no one would ever believe me. He was too smart for a dainty little female like me. That was an actual quote from him by the way”

“I’m sorry he spoke to you like that. You didn’t deserve that”

“That’s not the point. I egged him on. I wanted him to talk. I was voice recording. He admits to disposing of a burner phone in it”

“Send it to me now. This will help my case”

“Are you building a case against him?” Daisy made eye contact with Lisa. She gathered that Lisa wasn’t going to tell her anything. “I get it, official police business. If you are building a case about Kit, then I think you should know that he was back late on the night Joel died. He also drank half a bottle of Whisky that night. I didn’t think anything of it at the time, put it down to his brother’s death but now I’m not so sure”

“Could I get that as an official on the record statement. I think you’ve just massively helped my case.” Lisa pulled out her phone and messaged DI Castello stating that she would like a meeting with him and that she was on the way to the station.

DI Castello shut the door behind Lisa. DS Swain had opted to stand instead of sitting and so Castello felt obliged to stand as well.

“What was so important that you had to have a meeting with me today”

“I know I’m suspended, and I will get in trouble with this, but I have a new suspect in the Joel Deering case”

“You were taken off of that case for a reason DS Swain”

“I know, I know but this is important. I wouldn’t be here if I didn’t think it was”

“Okay, go ahead. Show me what you’ve found”

And so, Lisa presented her evidence. All of it. She talked about the argument in the street, the red car, the fact that Kit’s car was seen on that road. She mentioned the fact that Kit was out and came back late on the night of the murder. How he stole a bottle of whisky and drank half in one night ensuring to mention the guilt that DC Green may have been feeling. Even after everything she could tell Castello wasn’t going to open an investigation into DC Kit Green. She could tell by his body language. Lisa was only going to do this as a last resort, but she felt it was needed. She played DI Castello the voice note. She had listened to it on the way over and she couldn’t believe how much Kit revealed. To a normal citizen like Daisy, all Kit seems to do is admit he was trying to set someone up but to a detective Kit admits so much more. He admits that he’s weak. That he’s easy to crack. All you need to do is bruise his ego. He also admits to disposing of evidence so that will definitely help get DI Castello on her side.

“While that is condemning evidence that DC Green is planning on setting someone up for a crime that does not prove he murdered Joel Deering”

“Come on sir. You can’t tell me that you seriously think they aren’t linked. Who fought so hard to get me off the case? Who fought so hard to have me suspended? Who fought so hard to have me considered a suspect? Who fought so hard to have me charged even after you told him the conviction wouldn’t stick with the CPS? You can’t tell me these are all coincidences”

“While I admit there is most probably a link between these events there is no proof. Absolutely nothing you have said will land a conviction in the Joel Deering case. Perverting the course of justice? Possibly. Murder? No chance.”

“I’m not asking you to charge him. All I want is for DC Green to be taken in for questioning. I know how to make him crack. You’ve got to trust me on this.”

“Look your one of my most senior, reliable detectives. I’m going to bring him in for questioning. You’re not allowed to question him. Your still suspended. I’m extending your suspension by another three days as well. You know better than to investigate cases while suspended. You can leave now.”

“Sorry DI Castello” Lisa turned to leave. Happy that Castello was going to bring Kit in for questioning but a little frustrated that she couldn’t be the one to question him. She would have loved that.

“Tinker what are you doing here?” Kit asked PC Tinker a bit shocked that the police officer was at his house.

“DI Castello would like to ask you a few questions down at the station”

“Well why didn’t he message me”

“Mr Green, if you do not come with me to the station, I will have no choice but to arrest you”

“I’m going Tinker, I’m going. Chill out a little, yeah?”

Kit was definitely nervous. They couldn’t have possibly found the burner phone, so he had no idea why he was here. If he was being unsuspended, then Castello would have just told him not drag him into an interview room.

“Do I need a solicitor”

“Interesting that’s your first thought”

“Well, I am in an interview room”

“Kit Green, where were you on the 27th of September”

“I want a solicitor”

After many hours of questioning, along with the evidence DS Swain had already collected, DI Castello had enough to arrest DC Green. A confession would go a long way. Castello hoped by arresting Kit that he would be scared into a confession.

“Kit Green I am arresting you on the suspicion of murdering Joel Deering on the night of the 27th of September. You have the right to remain silent. Anything you say can and will be used against you in a court of law”

“Am I allowed out or do I have to stay in a cell”

“You’ll be in the cells until your hearing, anything else?”

“Nope. I hope you find the right killer soon though. The longer I’m in here the bigger the lawsuit”

Chapter Text

“MUM! MUM! MUM! Have you seen it? Have you seen it?”

“Seen what Betsy?”

“DC Green has been arrested for Joel’s murder”

“Oh, has he?”

“Mum don’t be like that. I know you had something to do with it. Is this why Carla bought me home and we had a movie night”

“I didn’t know you had a movie night. Did you have fun”

“Yeah, Carla’s actually cool at times. I can see why you like spending time with her. That’s not the point though. Did he actually kill Joel. Was he trying to set you up”

“Betsy, love I have no idea. I’m still suspended. However, I did go to the station last night and presented some new evidence which might have helped with the conviction as well”

“Well now he’s been arrested does that mean your going back to work?” Betsy asked. Lisa could hear the sadness in her daughter’s voice.

“No, I got suspended for three more days for investigating while suspended. But I was thinking of taking some time off anyway”

“Really? But you love work”

“I have loved spending time with you these last few days. I am sorry. I haven’t been the best mum. I want to make it up to you so if work needs to take a backseat, then work is going to take a back seat”

Betsy hugged her mum careful not to put too much pressure on any if the bruises.

“Love you mum”

“Love you too”

“What’s the plan for the day mum. I’ve got the day off; you’ve got the day off. Carla most likely will have the day off. Seemed to always have days off together. Crazy how that works”

“Enough of your sarcasm young lady. What would you like to do? It is nearly 12pm. You have slept half the day”

“Lunch? I enjoyed getting breakfast together the other day”

“Okay, we will go get lunch. The Bistro, okay?”

“Bistro is okay with me”

Ryan and Carla were sitting at a booth in the Bistro. When Ryan had told her that Kit had been arrested, she suggested that they go and celebrate. They had got rid of Kit who Carla really didn’t like; in fact, she hated him even when Ryan and Kit were friends, but they had also successfully lied to the police about being alibis for Lisa. Lisa was no longer a suspect and that truly needed celebrating.

“So, I was thinking about getting a nice steak. What about you Carla?”

“I was thinking about Lisa”

“Of course you were. Want to talk about it. Or better invite her to sit with us”

“What do you mean?”

“Her and Betsy just walked in”

Carla quickly turned around. She needed to see for herself that Lisa was here. Wow she looked good with her hair down and her cropped green hoodie. As much as Carla liked seeing Lisa in her work clothes it was nice to see that Lisa was more relaxed.

“Lisa, Betsy come sit with us” Ryan shouted across the room.

“What’d ya do that for” Carla whispered

“Oh, give over, you were practically drooling over her. I had to intervene”

“Hi Ryan, Hi Carla. Thanks for inviting us over”

“Ew mum you sound so official. Stop acting like they aren’t your friends”

Ryan tried to hide a laugh

“Oi Ryan, Betsy, leave Lisa alone”

Betsy rolled her eyes and sat down next to Ryan. “Always ruining the fun around here”
Lisa took the empty seat next to Carla.

“We haven’t ordered yet by the way so feel free to have a good look through the menu” Carla suggested.

“No need, I already know I’m getting a burger and Betsy wants a steak. Us Swain’s come well prepared”

“No way I’m getting a steak too. Great minds think alike” Ryan hold his hand out for Betsy to high five.

“Weirdo” Betsy says laughing while completing the high five.

“It’s good to see those two get on so great hey” Carla whispered to Lisa

“Yeah, it’s great. No surprise really though. Ryan is a great guy”

“Careful there sounds like you might be hitting on him” Carla joked

“1. He is way too young and 2. I’m still a lesbian” Lisa joked back.

“Not found the right guy then yet” Carla playfully said. A little nervous that she has potentially crossed the line. Her and Lisa were good friends and so she didn’t want a distasteful joke to ruin that.

“Oh, don’t even get me started. I’ve heard that way too many times”

“Sorry to hear that”

“It’s okay you get used to it in the end”

“You shouldn’t have to get used to it” Carla smiled up at Lisa offering up her support. She didn’t know why but she felt this overwhelming need to comfort Lisa. To protect her from anything bad that will happen to her. This crush was getting out of hand Carla thought to herself.

The food arriving bought everyone out of their individual conversations. Betsy and Ryan argued over whose steak was whose. They both wanted the same steak, Betsy stating that it just looked better than the other one with Ryan saying there was more meat which he needed since he was bigger. Lisa and Carla watched in aware as the pair argued like siblings. They didn’t have that problem as they both ordered different meals. Betsy ended up having the better steak while Ryan sulked about having the other one. Lisa and Carla both laughed. Neither of them could believe that Ryan gave up his steak for the teenager.

“Carlaaaaa”

“Yes Betsy”

“I was thinking since mum missed out on movie night last night that we should do it again”

“That’s not up to me, Betsy that’s up to your mum”

“Mummmmmmm”

“Yes, Carla can come over for a movie night but only if she wants to, you as well Ryan” Lisa laughed not needing her daughter to ask the question.

“Well Ryan and I will go get some popcorn and then we will be round. Just don’t let Ryan pick the film. He makes awful decisions”

“Well, that’s just not true” Ryan responded.

“Lisa what time should we come round” Carla asked. She didn’t want to turn up unannounced. She didn’t think her and Lisa were there with each other yet.

“Anytime you want really”

“I would suggest after 6pm. You don’t want to see mum try to cook for more than two people. It’s a disaster” Betsy interrupts.

“I’ll take your word for it. I’ll see you both after dinner then. See you later”

“Bye Carla, bye Ryan” Lisa says while Betsy waved at the pair. Lisa was secretly glad that Betsy had invited Carla round for a movie night. She was enjoying her day. Her and Carla were back to normal, and Betsy and Ryan were getting on well. Lisa could see Carla and Ryan staying in their lives for a long time.

“Carla you were right that was an awful movie choice by Ryan. Who even likes Back to the Future.” Betsy stated

“Oi you. I’m offended” Ryan chucked a pillow in Betsy’s direction.

“You are an actual child Ryan” Carla shook her head lovingly.

“I’m choosing the next movie. I’ll show Ryan what an actual good movie is” Betsy said searching through the various streaming sites trying to find a good movie. “How do we all feel about a Romcom?” Betsy asked the group. Ryan shrugged while Lisa nodded. Carla said she wasn’t bothered about the genre as anything was better than Back to the Future.

“Put on when Harry met Sally Betsy. That’s one of my favourites”

“I was thinking something more modern mum like Set it Up on Netflix”

“Oh, go on then. We can watch when Harry met Sally next time”

“Thanks mum. You’re the best”

Lisa and Carla were sitting next to each other of the couch. Ryan was on the armchair while Betsy was sitting on the bean bag on the floor. Lisa was in her pyjamas and wrapped up in a blanket as she had got cold fairly quick into the first movie. As night began to fall the temperature had definitely dropped. Lisa could see out of the corner of her eye that Carla was shivering slightly. Lisa opened up the corner of the blanket silently offering Carla to share some of the blanket. Carla didn’t need to be told twice, and she took some of the blanket off of Lisa.

“You can come closer to me you know. You’d get more of the blanket that way as well”

“Sorry didn’t want to make you uncomfortable” Carla sheepishly said. Carla was normally calm, collected, confident yet Lisa Swain continues to make her a nervous wreck.

“My bruises are fine. You can get closer” Lisa said back in reply.

That was not the kind of uncomfortable Carla was talking about, but she wasn’t going to tell Lisa that. Carla shifted closer to Lisa. Immediately feeling the warmth from not only the extra blanket but also from Lisa’s body.

“You were so cold oh my god. You’re making me cold” Lisa states amused that Carla was suffering in silence for a while instead of asking for the blanket.

“Don’t laugh at other misfortune. Has no-one ever told you that”

“My bad, my bad”

“Can you two shut up. The two assistants are definitely about to get together” Ryan stated towards Carla and Lisa which caused Betsy to turn around. Betsy’s face fell a little. Carla and Lisa were practically hugging each other under the blanket. She was happy that her mum seemed so happy, but her heart was breaking. She tried to turn back and focus on the movie. She tried her hardest to ignore the bubbling feeling of anger growing inside of her.

“Thank you for such a lovely evening. I had such a good time. Ryan did too”

“No problem at all. We had a good time as well didn’t we Betsy”

“Yeah, great time” Betsy tried her hardest not to let her emotions show

“Are you sure your awake enough to drive. You can always stay here”

“Thanks for the offer but I’m okay to drive. See you tomorrow?” Carla asked.

“See you tomorrow” Lisa confirmed and shut the front door.

“Of course, you’re seeing her tomorrow. You two can’t go five minutes without seeing each other anymore” Betsy’s tone was harsher than she intended but she couldn’t help it.

“I thought you liked Carla? I thought you had a good time today”

“Yeah, I did until you decided to make the evening all about you and Carla” Betsy shouted towards her mum while storming upstairs.

Lisa was left speechless, confused on what just happened. Honestly Betsy had the worst mood swings ever. Lisa wasn’t going to let that ruin her good day. She will deal with Betsy’s outburst tomorrow.

Chapter Text

Lisa had been up for hours. She would be lying if she said she had a good night’s rest. She couldn’t help but think about Betsy’s outburst. Lisa wasn’t naïve. She knew what time of year was coming up. She knew how difficult this month is for Betsy. How difficult this month is for both of them. What was bothering her though was that Betsy was choosing to bottle up her emotions again. After they had both promised to make more of an effort to communicate effectively with each other, Lisa felt a little hurt that her daughter felt like she couldn’t talk to her. She thought they were making good progress with each other; Lisa didn’t want the memories of Becky to build walls between her and Betsy again. Lisa was brought out of her thoughts by the sound of the stairs creaking. Betsy had finally woken up.

“Morning sleepy head. Want some tea?” Lisa offered to her daughter. She knows they need to talk about what happened last night. She just wasn’t sure how to start the conversation.

“Morning, yes please” Betsy mumbled in reply not even looking up at her mum.

Lisa made both her and Betsy a cup of tea and sat down at the kitchen table. She gestured for Betsy to do the same. The teenager was aware that her mum wanted to talk about what she said last night but Betsy wasn’t sure she was ready to have that conversation. Not quite yet anyway. Betsy stayed standing and quickly drank her cup of tea.

“Sorry mum. Would love to stay and chat but I’m running late for work. Got to go get ready.” Betsy left her mug on the kitchen counter and practically sprinted up the stairs. Lisa let out a deep sigh, massaging her temples. This conversation was going to be harder than she thought.

“Thanks for the lift mum. Much appreciated. Don’t come in. I don’t need to be walked in”

“Okay, I’ll stay here”

Besty gave her mum a quizzical look. Her mum had made every excuse recently to come in and say hi to Carla. Betsy was confused as to why her mum was happy to stay away. It wasn’t because of her, was it? She hasn’t ruined a friendship for her mum, has she? Its not like she doesn’t want her mum to have friend or to be happy.

“Betsy, go or you really will be late. I’ll pick you up later okay kiddo”

Betsy stepped out the car and gave her mum a wave before turning away and walking into the factory. She made a mental note to talk to her mum later. She didn’t want her mum to ruin a good friendship because of her fears.

“Hi Betsy, you’ve got the first two hours to work on your college assignment but after that you’ve actually got to do your job”

“Thanks Carl- Ms Connor” Betsy corrected herself. She didn’t want the other workers to think she was getting special treatment. She wanted to remain professional in the workplace. Everyone else called Carla Mrs Connor so Betsy should to. Betsy could see that Carla was looking over her shoulder. Betsy rolled her eyes. She knew exactly what or should she say who her boss was trying to look for.

“Mum couldn’t come in. She said to tell you she said hi” Betsy wasn’t even sure what had possessed her to lie. Her mum did not tell her to say hi. Her mum didn’t even tell her why she didn’t follow her in like normal. Betsy guessed that she had just told one of those white lies that adults always go on about. It’s not like it would hurt anyone. Her mum probably wanted to say hi earlier anyway.

“Oh well tell her I said hi. Now get to work”

“Just message her. It’s not the 1500’s, I don’t need to be your personal messenger” Betsy rolled her eyes and walked towards her workstation. She was thankful that Carla was allowing her more time to finish off her college assignment. She was almost finished which meant that she could give it to her mum very soon. Hopefully in time for her birthday next year.

Lisa was in the pub. She had no idea what to do with herself today. Betsy was clearly avoiding her. She had never seen her daughter rush to work so fast. Carla was also working. It was not like Lisa could even talk to Carla at the moment though. She didn’t want Betsy to come up with even more fake scenarios before she had a chance to talk to her. Just as Lisa was about to order another drink, she felt her phone vibrate in her pocket. ‘Hi, on break at the moment. Want some company’. Lisa smiled as she read the message from Carla. She couldn’t help but feel happy that Carla had messaged her first. Lisa thought long and hard about her reply. Typing and deleting her message approximately five times. Why was this so difficult, Lisa thought. Messaging Carla made her overthink like crazy. She didn’t want to give off the wrong impression but how could Lisa know what the wrong impression was when she didn’t even know what impression she wanted to give off. Lisa settled for simple ‘at the pub’. Simple but direct.

Carla walked into the pub to see Lisa sitting on her own, sipping on a sparkling water.

“No alcohol today?” Carla questioned sitting down opposite Lisa.

“Well, it is only 1pm. Plus I said I’d drive Betsy home today”

“You been here all day?” Carla questioned again. She hates the thought of Lisa being on her own.

“Yeah, but it’s not been too bad. Peace and quiet” Lisa said to Carla. It was clear Lisa didn’t believe in what she was saying. It was clear she was lonely when she wasn’t at work and everyone else, she knew was.

“I can think of better days than just sitting in the pub”

“Have you just come here to judge me” Lisa said jokingly even though there was a slight truth to the question.

“I could never judge you” Carla said sincerely looking into Lisa’s eyes. Lisa smiled up at Carla. Carla loved Lisa’s smile. Lisa looked adorable whenever she smiled. Her eyes light up and her shoulders relax. In fact, it was like her whole demeanour relaxes. Carla wanted to see Lisa smile more often. Carla wasn’t sure how much time had passed. She hadn’t gone back to work. She wasn’t too bothered anyway. She was having a much better time with Lisa.

“Your staring” Lisa pointed out causing Carla to blush.

“Sorry, I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to. It’s just- “Carla struggled to think of an excuse; speaking so fast that her words were jumbling together.

“Just what” Lisa probed, trying to hide her smirk.

“Er, just that, erm. Are you going to make me come up with something”

“Yeah, keep thinking. Love to see a women sweat”

Carla coughed on her drink. She was well and truly flustered. Lisa wasn’t even hiding he smirk anymore. She had clearly got the reaction from Carla that she wanted. Carla wasn’t sure what to say in response. She was just staring at her glass of water. Lisa burst out in laughter.

“Sorry, sorry. You set it up perfectly” Lisa managed to say in between laughter.

“You’re finding yourself so funny”

“Well, I am! You should have seen your face!” Lisa proclaimed.

“What was I meant to respond to that!” Carla rebutted.

“Fair point, fair point” Lisa giggled.

“Oh, for God’s sake. Can you two stop flirting with each other for 30 seconds. I actually wanted to talk to you mum about your plans for tomorrow. Its mum birthday. Bet you didn’t remember. Too busy with your new toy” Betsy shouted. Clearly upset with her mum. Carla and Lisa looked up shocked at what Betsy had just said. Lisa had no idea how long Betsy had been standing there or what she had heard.

“Betsy apologise to Carla. Your being rude. We will talk about this at home”

“So you admit it. You forgot about mum’s birthday” Betsy states accusingly.

“Betsy I am not doing this here, not in public. Let’s go home”

“I better go” Carla states offering Lisa a look of sympathy.

“Oh no stay. You clearly want to be part of our family so bad” Betsy glares at Carla.

“Betsy. Stop it. I’m warning you” Lisa says.

“Whatever”

“Home now.” Betsy hadn’t heard her mum’s tone be that strict in ages. She knew she had messed up. She just couldn’t control her emotions. How was it fair that her mum was sitting and laughing with Carla while she struggled with the fact that it was her mum’s birthday tomorrow. Doesn’t her mum care. Becky was her wife. Why doesn’t she care?

Lisa and Betsy had just arrived home. Lisa instructed Betsy to go into the living room.

“Want to explain what the outburst in the pub was about and while you’re at it, what your outburst yesterday was about”

“No”

“Betsy come on. Talk to me” Lisa softened her tone.

Betsy started crying. She couldn’t help it.

“Oh Betsy come here love” Lisa didn’t care about her bruises. She engulfed her daughter into the tightest hug possible.

“I am so sorry mum. I don’t know what happened. I just felt so much anger”

“Anger about what darling”

“I don’t know how to explain it”

“Just try your best kiddo. I’m here to listen not to judge”

“It’s mums’ birthday tomorrow”

Okay Lisa wasn’t expecting that to be the first thing Betsy said.

“I know. Doesn’t get any easier does it”

“I thought you had forgot” Betsy said honestly. “I mean you were having a right laugh with Carla in the pub”

“I could never forget about your mum. Never.”

“I know that. I mean she was your wife. I just. I don’t know how to explain it” Betsy sighed.

“Just try your best”

“It hurts to see you happy” Betsy glanced and saw the hurt look on her mum’s face. “It’s not like I want to see you miserable. Far from it. It just feels like I’m the only one hurting this year. I’m the only one struggling this year. For the last two years we were both sad on the lead up to mum’s birthday and the death anniversary. This year it feels like I’m on my own” Betsy tried to clarify.

“I’m sorry you feel like that. I am hurting though. I still miss Becky. But she would want us to be happy. She wouldn’t want us to keep feeling sad all the time”

“Not sure she’d want you pining after someone else either”

“What’s that supposed to mean?” Lisa said a little defensively.

“You and Carla. You are clearly together. You could have told me”

“Me and Carla? What?” Lisa asked genuinely confused.

“Don’t play dumb with me mum. I’ve seen the way you look at her. The way she looks at you”

“Carla and I are not together sweetheart. As far as I’m concerned Carla is straight”

“Oh come off it Mum. Carla Connor is definitely not straight. Thought you was meant to have a gaydar”

Lisa allowed her to think about the possibility of Carla not being straight. Would something happen between them? No. Lisa couldn’t let herself wonder. She would only get hurt in the end.

“I was such a cow to Carla mum. After everything she’s done for me”

“Want to explain why you had a go at Carla? You don’t have to if you don’t want to. You’ve been so honest tonight”

Betsy thought about keeping her thoughts to herself but decided against it. She might as well be fully honest. “It’s silly I know but it felt like you were trying to replace mum with Carla”

“Betsy” Lisa said softly looking her daughter in the eyes.

“Carla has been so great to me but seeing her all cozy and well domestic with you, it freaked me out. I don’t want Carla to replace mum. I don’t want Carla to be the reason you forget mum”

“Betsy I could never forget your mum. Becky meant everything to me. She will always be apart of my life. Carla and I are not together. Honestly. If for some reason that ever changes which I’m not sure it will then you will be the first to know. Your opinion matters to me”

“I do want you to be happy mum. Carla clearly makes you happy. Whether its as a friend or more. I’m sorry I got mad at you”

“You shouldn’t bottle up your emotion’s kiddo. Promise to talk to me if you ever feel like this again”

“I promise”

“Good, now go get a jacket. I was going to go by myself, but I think we should go together”

“Where are we going”

“To say happy birthday to your mum. It’s gone past midnight”

“Could we stop off at Carla’s on the way? I want to apologise to her in person”

“If she’s awake then of course we can” Lisa said sending a quick message to Carla, so she wasn’t bombarded by Betsy this late at night.

“You did mean it right mum. You’d tell me if there was anything going on between you and Carla”

“I promise, Darling” Lisa said grabbing her car keys on the side. Lisa couldn’t help but think about Betsy’s words. ‘The way she looks at you’. Was there a chance that Carla wasn’t straight. Was there a slight chance that Carla felt the intense connection to?

Chapter Text

Lisa was in the kitchen drinking a coffee. She was going to need all the help she could get to get through today. Her and Betsy had stayed out way too late visiting Becky last night. They didn’t get back until around 2am and Lisa didn’t sleep much when they had got back anyway. She always struggled to sleep before big events. Becky was always there to calm her down, get her to relax, help her to switch off and sleep. But Becky isn’t here anymore, and her late wife’s birthday was the reason for her lack of sleep. Lisa took a deep breath, collecting her thoughts. She glanced at her phone looking at the time. 10am. She should probably wake Betsy up. As much as the teenager would like to, Lisa can’t let her sleep the day away. Its not healthy. Lisa put her coffee down on the counter and made her way upstairs. She quietly made her way to Betsy’s room knocking on the door first encase the teenager was already awake. No response. She cracked the door open and crouched down by Betsy’s head.

“Betsy love, time to wake up” Lisa whispered gently shaking Betsy.

“Wake me up when its tomorrow” Betsy replied turning over so her mother couldn’t see her face.

“Come on kiddo. Can’t stay in here forever”

“I can try though”

“Come on love” Lisa pleaded. If Betsy was this bad on Becky’s birthday, then what would she be like in a couple days’ time when it was the three-year death anniversary.

Betsy sat up. It was like she could sense the sadness in her mum’s voice. “Okay, okay, I’m getting up. You win”

“I was wondering if you wanted to spend the day together?” Lisa said while moving away from the edge of Betsy’s bed, wanting to give her daughter some space.

“Yeah okay. I’d like that” Betsy said sincerely smiling at her mum. Last year ended in a massive argument. Betsy was angry that her mum didn’t want to do anything to celebrate Becky’s birthday. Lisa didn’t want that to happen again this year. As much as she felt like laying in bed and drowning her sorrows in alcohol Lisa knew that her daughter needed her. Her daughter needed to feel as though her mum wasn’t being forgotten about.

“Get dressed. We need to brainstorm ideas of where to go. Your mum used to love going on a family day out on her birthday”

“Bowling. Let’s go bowling”

Lisa smiled at Betsy. The memory of going bowling as a family and being absolutely terrible. Lisa had to put the barriers up halfway through to the amusement of both Betsy and Becky.

“Bowling it is.”

Lisa and Betsy made a quick stop off at Roy’s café for some breakfast. Betsy had made a declaration that there was nothing good to eat in the house, so Lisa had decided to treat her with a meal out. Roy’s café was Betsy’s choice. Walking out of the café Lisa saw Carla walking across the street. Betsy had also noticed Carla and quickly turned to her mum.

“I know we are going out to celebrate mum, but I didn’t get to apologise last night. Can I go?” Betsy pleaded.

“Too late. She’s practically here” Lisa said noticing that Carla was walking towards the café.

“I erm read your message this morning. Sorry had an early night last night” Carla said as she approached Lisa, avoiding eye contact with Betsy.

“It’s okay”

“So, what was so important you wanted to tell me at a ridiculous late hour” Carla was still looking at Lisa. Carla hadn’t even glanced in Betsy’s direction. She felt awkward after the teenager’s outburst.

“It was me. I wanted to see you” Betsy said quietly. She wasn’t sure why she was so sacred. She’d shouted at Carla plenty of times before, being fired from working at the factory more than once but this felt different.

“Oh.” Carla paused ensure what to say now. She was just planning to ignore Betsy for a few days until everything was forgotten about.

“I wanted to apologize” Betsy continued. She looked at her mum for support. Lisa gave Betsy an encouraging nod silently telling her to continue. Lisa was proud of her daughter for wanting to apologize. A few months ago, Betsy would have absolutely refused to accept any responsibility and would have put the blame fully on Carla. Even though Carla had done nothing wrong last night.

“I’m so sorry Carla. I was such a cow to you. I said some horrible things I didn’t mean. I was hurting and it felt like I was the only one hurting. I’m so used to me and mum being sad together. And well she was happy talking to you last night and I got upset. I am sorry. Truly”

Carla was taken aback by Betsy’s apology. In all the months she has now known Betsy she doesn’t think she’s ever heard the teenager be so sincere. “It’s okay Betsy. We all struggle sometimes. But don’t think that’s an invitation for me to be your verbal punching bag.” Carla joked trying to relieve some of the tension.

“Understood Mrs Connor” Betsy said through a smile. “Meet you in the car mum” Betsy said walking away giving her mum a chance to talk to her friend.

“We talked last night. Properly. I think it helped her” Lisa said turning to look at Carla.

“It must of. She just apologised” Carla exclaimed. “You two going out?” Carla questioned.

“It’s Becky’s birthday today. Celebrating” Lisa said, opening up to Carla.

Carla looked at Lisa. She understood why Betsy was so upset last night. Her apology made a lot more sense now. Betsy thought that Lisa didn’t care about Becky’s birthday. Betsy thought that Lisa didn't care because of her. “How are you feeling”

“Trying to be strong for Betsy” Lisa said honestly. She doesn’t know why but she can’t seem to keep her feelings to herself when she’s with Carla. It’s like Carla herself was a truth drug and well Lisa couldn’t get enough. As hard as it was to admit Carla was helping Lisa more than she knew. This was the happiest Lisa had been in three years and although the next week was going to be a hard time she was relieved to know that she had a friend to lean on. She hasn’t had that in a while. After Becky had died, she cut off most of her friends. Not on purpose. She just couldn’t deal with the sympathetic looks and started pulling away. People give up trying after a while. Lisa was bought out of her thoughts by her car horn blaring.

Carla chuckled. “Someone’s impatient. Remember you don’t need to be strong all the time, yeah Lisa”

“Yeah” Lisa replied not taking in Carla’s advice. Betsy needed her too be strong today. Betsy couldn’t know how hard celebrating today really was for her.

“Right, I’ll leave you to it. You know where I am if you need yeah?”

“See you later Carla.” Lisa turned away and walked back into her car and into the passenger seat.

“Finally! You took forever. Thought we’d miss our slot”

“Come on then trouble. Prepare to lose” Lisa said starting up the car and driving in the direction of the bowling alley.

“This is not fair! The lane is clearly slanted!” Lisa exclaimed.

“Oh yeah course it is. Couldn’t be that your just bad” Betsy retorted, laughing at her mum. Lisa truly was terrible at bowling.

“The barriers are definitely coming up for the next game”

“Boo how boring” Betsy giggled.

Lisa smiled. It was nice to spend a day out with her daughter. They hadn’t done something like this in a long time. A twinge of guilt hit Lisa. She knew that it was mostly down to her that they haven’t spent a lot of time together recently. Losing Becky had really hit her hard. She sometimes forgets that Betsy had also lost her mum. That’s hard for anyone to deal with let alone a 13-year-old.

“Betsy come here. Let’s take a picture” Lisa said pulling out her phone while Betsy took her last shot of their first game. Betsy came over with a smug look on her face after finishing the first game with a strike.

“Want to take a photo of my victory as well mother” Betsy said biting her lip trying to repress a smile.

“Haha very funny. Come here” Lisa said pulling Betsy into a hug. She held her arm up and took a selfie with Betsy. Lisa smiled at the picture. She showed the picture to Betsy.

“Send that to me please”

“Just sent kiddo. Ready to get thrashed this game?”

“If you win its only because your cheating”

“I am not cheating. How can you even cheat at bowling”

“You have the barriers up” Betsy said in a singsong tone while walking over to the bowling balls.

“You are so bad at bowling I can’t believe it” Betsy was laughing. They had played two games and Betsy had won twice. It wasn’t even close.

“Yeah, well let’s do something I am good at then” Lisa said, her eyes fixed on the pool tables in front of her.

“Oh you are so on” Betsy declared. She had a competitive look in her eye. It was the same glint that Becky used to get. Lisa knows it’s not genetically possible, but Betsy is so much like the both of them. Its true what they say. A child’s behaviour reflects the environment they were bought up in.

Lisa and Betsy were walking down the cobbles ice creams in hand. Anyone would think they were insane for having ice cream in November.

“Thank you mum”

“For what?” Lisa questioned

“For today. I really needed this. Believe it or not I like spending time with you”

“I’m sorry” Lisa said quietly

“No sorry I didn’t mean to make you feel bad” Betsy said frantically.

“You haven’t, don’t worry. I am sorry though. I haven’t been the best mum since Becky’s passing. You’ve been struggling too. I should have spent more time with you. This suspension has taught me that I need to take more time off work” Lisa was honest with her daughter. She felt as though Betsy needed to hear it.

“You’ve been trying your best”

“I love you Betsy”

“I love you too mum”

The moment was interrupted by Lisa’s phone vibrating. It was Carla.

‘How are you? My flat is free if you need to talk’ the message read. Lisa smiled at her phone. Carla was always so thoughtful.

“You should go see her. She cares a lot about you and well its clear you think the same”

“You’d be okay with that” Lisa was shocked. She expected her daughter to kick off about Carla trying to ruin their day.

Betsy shrugged. “I was going to ask if I could go see mum anyway. I know we saw her last night or this morning technically, but I want to speak to her alone. No offence.”

“None taken. Text me when you get home okay. Its dark. I need to know your safe”

“I will do. Now go see Carla. You’ve probably been itching to all day. Can barely spend five minutes apart”

“That is not true!” Lisa said flustered, a bit embarrassed that her daughter was pointing out how much time her and Carla have been spending together lately.

“Just one thing before I leave mum”

“What?” Lisa said softly.

“Can the anniversary be a day for just me and you? No Carla. No anyone else”

“Of course love”

“Promise?”

“I promise Betsy”

“Hi mum. Me again. Happy Birthday” Betsy sat down on the ground in front of her mum’s grave. “I know I spoke to you earlier, but mum was listening. She said she wasn’t, but she definitely was. She’s always been bad at lying hasn’t she” Betsy laughed while a tear fell down her cheek. “We went bowling today, me and mum. She’s still just as bad. I’ve got better though. I think I would be able to beat you now. I know, I know crazy talk” Betsy hesitated. There was a reason she wanted to talk to her mum. She just wasn’t sure if she was ready to say it out loud. If she said it out loud than that would make it real.

Betsy had been quite for some time now. Just staring at her mum’s name on the gravestone. “I think mum might be ready to love again” Betsy said quietly, taking herself by surprise. “She hasn’t said anything to me mum, but I can see it in her eyes. There's this woman. Carla, my boss, I’ve told you about her before. Mum looks at her like she’s the only person in the room. Like how she used to look at you. You’d be happy for her wouldn’t you mum? You wouldn’t want mum to be alone forever, would you?” Betsy paused like she was waiting for some kind of sign. “I don’t know if mum is ready to admit it yet mum. I mean I’m not ecstatic with the idea of her dating again. I know no one will replace you and Carla would never want to do that anyway but its scary. I don’t want mum getting hurt again. You hurt her a lot you know. She hasn’t been the same since you died. It was like I lost both mums on the same night. I’m only just getting her back. I don’t want to lose her again” Tears were freely flowing down Betsy’s cheek now. She went to stand up. She could talk to her mum again tomorrow. It was getting late she didn’t want her mum to worry about where she was.

As Betsy went to stand up a leaf fell and landed straight at her feet. Betsy smiled at the leaf. It was shaped like a love heart. Betsy knew it was a message from her mum. “Your right mum. We should let ourselves love again. I love you. Speak to you soon”

Chapter Text

Lisa woke up smiling. She felt so refreshed. Lisa couldn’t remember the last time she had woken up feeling like this. She had such a good day yesterday. She had obviously felt sad. She still misses her wife; they were together for a very long time. But spending the day, celebrating Becky’s memory with Betsy was amazing. Lisa also got to speak about how she was really feeling in the evening with Carla as well. Lisa really appreciated Carla. It was like Carla knew Lisa was bottling up how she was feeling, trying to be strong all the time. She had a good cry last night talking to Carla. It was nice to have someone to confide in.

“Morning mum. You giving me a lift to work today?” Betsy asked walking into the kitchen and putting some bread in the toaster.

“Of course I’ll give you a lift. It’s a shame you have to work today. It’s my last day being suspended, I’m back to work tomorrow”

“Wait you you’re going back to work so soon?” Betsy would be lying if she didn’t say she was sad about her mum going back to work. Her mum has been so much happier since she’s been suspended.

“My suspension is over. I have to go back to work. I can’t stay at home forever”

“You could get a different job”

“I’m not going through this again Betsy” Lisa warned “I do promise to take more time off now though. I have learnt my lesson”

“So, if your back to work tomorrow does that mean you’re working on Friday?” Betsy asked sounding worried.

“What? Why would it matter if I’m working fri- oh” Lisa cut herself off realising what the date would be on Friday. “No, I’m not working Friday. I’ve booked that day off. I’m not letting us grieve separately this year. We’ve done that for the past 3 years nearly and it’s not worked in our favour. I promised you that we would spend the day together and we will”

“Okay. Okay good. I was scared you had forgotten again. I don’t want to have as much fun as we did on mum’s birthday though. I know this probably doesn’t make much sense, but I want to be sad. Mum’s birthday is a happy day, the anniversary of mum’s death is a sad day. I want to be sad. I want to be sad with you, as a family”

“I know love. It will be just me and you. Remembering our lovely Becky” Lisa paused as tears threatened to spill out. It didn’t feel as raw to talk about Becky anymore, but it still hurt. Lisa wasn’t sure if it would ever stop hurting. “Right go get dressed Betsy or you’ll be late”

Betsy rolled her eyes. “Your best friends with my boss. You’d think she wouldn’t be as harsh on me”

“Move it or I’ll tell Carla to cut your pay” Lisa said smiling so Betsy knew she wasn’t serious.

“Aren’t you funny” Betsy deadpanned walking up the stairs. She smiled to herself. She was enjoying hearing her mum laugh again. Maybe things were finally going to be okay.

Lisa doesn’t stay at the door like she normally does. Instead, she follows Betsy into Underworld much to the disappointment of the teenager. She didn’t want her mum watching her every move. Lisa said bye to Betsy at the teenager’s workstation and continued towards Carla’s office. She knocked on the office doors and didn’t walk in until she heard Carla say it was okay to do so.

“Lisa. I didn’t expect you today. What do I owe the pleasure”

“Well, the pleasure is all mine of course”

“Too right. Don’t think I don’t notice the flattery going on. What do you want?” Carla questioned lightheadedly.

“Me? Want something? How could you even suggest such a thing” Lisa faked disdain.

“Go on spill” Carla said rolling her eyes at Lisa’s terrible acting skills.

“I was wondering if there was any chance you could give Betsy a half day. It’s my last day on suspension and I was hoping to spend some time with her before I get drowned by paperwork”

“You been demoted to paperwork duty then?” Carla asked.

“Not officially but highly likely. They are definitely not giving me a big case any time soon or a promotion for that matter”

“You don’t need a promotion to be a brilliant detective. Besides DS Swain has a nice ring to it”

Lisa blushed at the compliment Carla had given her. She wasn’t used to people giving her compliments. “So, Betsy…?” Lisa asked trying to change the subject.

“Oh right. I hate to let you down Lisa, but we are so understaffed today. I just don’t see how I can afford to let Betsy have a half day” Carla sighed hoping that she hasn’t hurt Lisa’s feelings.

“It’s okay I get it. You have a business to run Carla. You have to do what is best. Betsy is your employee after all”

“Speaking of Betsy” Carla said, noticing that the teenager has moved from her workstation and is headed towards Carla’s office.

“What’s the odds she tells me to go away” Lisa joked.

“Mmm probably highly likely” Carla joked backed looking at Lisa with a loving look in her eye.

The door to the office swung open, slamming shut behind Betsy.

“What are you still doing here mum. Everyone out there is gossiping”

“Oh, are they now” Carla said laced with a little frustration.

“Well, no, not really” Betsy tried covering up for the other workers. Carla gives Betsy a pointed look implying that she should tell the truth.

“Okay yes, they are. They are placing bets on why mum is in the office this time” Betsy sighed.

“Right well I better tell them to grow up and get on with their work if they still want a job”

“What no don’t do that. I told them I wouldn’t grass” Betsy pleaded.

“So then why are you here” Carla questioned.

“I came to ask my mum that same question” Betsy turned to her mum “Why are you still here. You dropped me off ages ago”

“I was speaking to Carla” Lisa replied.

“Well yeah obviously. We can all see that. I meant what about” The teenager said sarcastically.

Lisa looked at Carla ensure if she could say that she had planned to get the teenager out of work early. Carla nodded to let Lisa know it was okay to tell Betsy the truth. If Betsy was angry then Carla knew she would have to deal with it. Its not Lisa’s fault that Carla was short-staffed.

“I was wondering if it would be okay for you to have a half day so we could spend my last suspended day together, but you have to stay here. Carla is short staffed today”

“What. Oh, Carla please. This might be the last time I actually spend anytime with my mum. You know what she gets like when she’s working” Betsy pleaded. She had enjoyed the last week with her mum. She might not act like it, but she does enjoy spending time with her mum.

“I’m sorry Betsy there’s just no way I can” Carla looked up to see Betsy visibly disappointed. “But your mum is welcome to stay in my office. She can take you out for a slightly longer lunch” Carla suggested hoping it would be enough to get the teenager on her side.

“Oh, great I can have 30 minutes with my mum. Spectacular” The sarcasm was dripping from Betsy’s voice.

“Tell you what Bets, you promise to work as best as you can for Carla, and we will spend the whole evening together. How does that sound?” Lisa asked hopefully. She didn’t know if her daughter already had plans.

“So, you’re trying to ditch me for lunch as well” Betsy sounded offended.

“No love, we can still have lunch together. I was just thinking we could have a night in” Lisa looked up to see Betsy contemplating the idea. Lisa glanced to look at Carla. She was hoping to spend time with Betsy in the day and spend her evening with Carla but that couldn’t happen now. Unless… Lisa bit her lip. Was she really going to do this? No. Too soon she decided.

“Carla, do you want to come round for dinner. I need a witness to mum’s horrible cooking skills” the teenager asked. Lisa looked panicked. She was thinking about asking Carla to dinner but thought it would be too much for Betsy. Clearly Betsy didn’t think so.

“Ryan is welcome too of course” Lisa added, wanting Carla to know that she was welcome. Betsy turned to her mum to give her a quizzical look. Betsy thought her mum would have enjoyed the chance to spend some time with Carla and she could have escaped to her room for the night. But if Ryan came that meant Betsy had to stay all night.

“Well, if you both don’t mind then I would love to come round for dinner” Carla smiled. “Ryan too of course” she quickly added hoping she didn’t sound to eager.

“Well then, I better go. Make sure we have enough food to cook for four people. Don’t let Betsy fool you I am an excellent cook”

“I look forward to it” Cala said honestly, slightly kicking herself with how enthusiastic she sounded.

This is so weird Betsy thought to herself. Yet part of her could not wait for the evening.

“Ryan are you in?” Carla shouts into her apartment while shutting the door. She thought she should tell her nephew about the invite in person rather than by text. It also would give her chance to talk about how she was feeling. Her head was all over the place at the moment.

“Yeah, what’s up” Ryan said walking into the living room.

“You’ve not got any plans tonight, have you?”

“No, why?” Ryan asked confused.

“We’ve been invited to dinner at the Swain residence”

“Ohhhhhhhh. Your crush asked you round for dinner” Ryan teased.

“Shut up” Carla threw a pillow at Ryan’s head. “And no not exactly. Betsy invited us round. Well, me round. Lisa opened the invitation up to you”

“Ouch, I’m just an afterthought” Ryan continued to joke.

“This isn’t funny Ryan”

“It is a little bit”

“No, it’s not! I didn’t even get invited by Lisa. I got invited by Betsy. I mean does Lisa even want us there. She probably just felt like she couldn’t say no since Betsy asked. And even if she does want me there, us there, why didn’t she ask me herself” Carla said frustratedly throwing herself on her couch. She reached for a pillow to hug, trying to seek comfort.

“Okay you are freaking out”

“You reckon Ryan” Carla glared at her nephew. He was not being any help right now.

“Look, if Lisa didn’t want you there, she would have told you and she certainly wouldn’t have extended the invite to me”

“What if she only invited you so it wasn’t just me and her”

“Ouch. Way to make a guy feel wanted”

“Sorry”

“What if she invited me so Betsy could have some company and you two could talk. What if she invited me so you didn’t feel awkward on your own. What if she invited me because she thought that was the only way you would say yes. There’s so many possibilities Carla. You can’t let yourself think about the negatives” Ryan said sincerely hoping to get through to Carla.

“What do I even where Ryan. I mean is it causal? Is it more?”

Ryan was slightly amused at his aunt’s overthinking. He has never seen her like this before. She was so falling for Lisa Swain. He could tell. In fact, he’s surprised the whole street hasn’t figured it out by now. “Well, are we going out for dinner or what?”

“Lisa is cooking”

“Right then wear something casual”

“Okay, yeah. Your right”

“Oh, and Carla”

“Yeah?”

“Do us a favour. Tell Lisa how you feel soon. Can’t have you having any more breakdowns over Lisa. That table is going to get a hole in it. You haven’t stopped bouncing your leg”

“Very funny Ryan”

“I mean it though. Tell her how you feel. From where I stand, you’re both pining for each other. One of you just need to make the first move” Ryan leaves to go get ready, leaving Carla all alone with her thoughts. Maybe he was right. Maybe Carla did need to bite the bullet and tell Lisa how she feels directly. She took a deep breath and stood up. She needed to get ready, or she’d end up being late. What a great impression that would be.

Lisa was frantic in the kitchen. She was so stressed about this dinner. Why did she offer to cook she thought to herself. She hasn’t cooked for this many people in ages; the last time probably the Christmas before Becky died and that was nearly four years ago now. Lisa doesn’t even know why she’s so stressed. It’s not like she’s even cooking a difficult meal, and she checked with Carla over text that both her and Ryan were okay with having spaghetti carbonara with garlic bread and some salad. She had never claimed to be the next Gordan Ramsey or anything but she did want the food to taste good.

“I never thought someone could make cooking look this difficult” Betsy smirked entering the kitchen.

“Very funny. You could have helped you know” Lisa deadpanned

“I don’t know. Looks like you’ve got everything under control to me” Betsy smiled innocently at her mum. Before Lisa could respond, the doorbell rang. Lisa took a deep breath knowing that it would be Carla and Ryan.

“Betsy go and get the door would you love, oh and set the table after. Dinner is almost ready”

Betsy leaves to go and answer the door, rolling her eyes at how obvious her mum was panicking. It was refreshing to see her mum actually display some emotion though. Betsy hoped that tonight would be a glimpse into the future. A future where her mum is carefree and happy.

“Hi Carla, Hi Ryan. Come in. I would avoid the kitchen for a while if I were you. You’d think she’s cooking for a hundred people or something” Betsy moved out the way of the door, letting Carla and Ryan walk into the house. Ryan was laughing at Betsy freely telling them how stressed Lisa seemed to be.

“I’ll brave it and go see your mum, need to ask where to put this anyway” Carla says showing that she bought a bottle of wine for the dinner.

“Wow how inconsiderate Mrs Connor. Bringing alcohol when I can’t even drink” Betsy teased.

“You never know if you’re on your best behaviour I might let you have a glass” Lisa shouted from the kitchen over hearing Betsy. Carla took that as her cue to go and see Lisa.

Betsy turned to look at Ryan. “I’ve got to set the table. Wanna help?”

“Ya mean do I want to do it for you” Ryan quizzed.

“Well, if your offering” Betsy smiled. Ryan shook his head laughing at the teenager.

“Come on we will do it together”

Meanwhile, in the kitchen Carla couldn’t help but laugh at the sight in front of her. Lisa was in an apron and her hair tied up in a messy bun. Carla tried to hide her smile. Lisa looked beautiful.

“What are you laughing at” Lisa asked spinning around to face Carla.

“Betsy said it was a mess in here, but I wasn’t expecting this”

“Are you calling me a mess?” Lisa asked defensively.

“I’m calling your kitchen a mess. Seriously Lisa how have you manged that?” Carla said trying to stifle a laugh, looking at the detective amusingly”

“Well, I said I’d cook dinner. I wanted to go through with it”

“Thank you. I can’t remember the last time I’ve had a proper home cooked meal. I survive off takeaways and restaurants at this point”

“Well, I hope my food lives up to the fancy restaurant food your used to”

“I have no doubt in my mind that it will be better”

“Oh my god Lisa that was incredible” Ryan exclaimed once he finished his food.

“Thank you” Lisa blushed trying to brush off the compliment as quick as possible.

“No seriously Lisa that was amazing. Thank you. If I hadn’t seen, you actually making the food I would have thought you’d ordered it in” Carla said honestly; throwing in a joke to try and ease some of the tension that was building between her and the detective throughout the dinner. Carla smiles at Lisa, thinking to herself that she doesn’t know how much longer she can keep her feeling for the DS a secret. She was falling for Lisa and fast. Carla doesn’t know if she has ever felt like this. Sure, she’s been in love before, but it’s never been like this. Falling for someone has never been this easy. With Lisa it just feels right. Having dinner with Lisa, Betsy and Ryan felt natural. It didn’t feel like this was the first time having a meal in the Swain house. It felt like they have been doing this forever. Carla smiles at the thought of a future with Lisa, Betsy and Ryan.

“I’m going to take that as a compliment” Lisa laughed, bringing Carla out of her trance. Carla closed her eyes telling herself that Lisa needed to know how she felt and soon.

“You’re not getting a compliment from me. That’s one of the only times your cooking has gone right” Besty told her mother, smiling so that her mum knew she was only joking. Lisa’s blush had grown, her cheeks red. Lisa was not used to all this attention.

“Okay okay, that’s enough. Too much attention for my liking. Betsy why don’t you go find a board game or something for us to play while I do the washing up” Lisa suggested, not ready for Carla to leave just yet.

“Ryan go with Betsy. Make sure it’s a good game. I’ll help Lisa with the washing up” Carla says. Ryan agreed knowing that it was an excuse to talk to Lisa alone.

“How do you feel that you’ve been lumbered with the teenager”

“Expected it” Ryan said.

“What do you mean you expected it” Besty asked stopping at the top of the stairs.

“Just that your mum and Carla like to spend a lot of time together” Ryan said nervously not wanting to say too much. He knows how much Betsy has gone through at a young age and he didn’t want to make that worse by saying anything she wasn’t ready to hear. Betsy nodded her head and continued walking towards the board game cupboard.

“Just warning, there is a lot of games to look through. Don’t think mum has ever thrown away a board game” Betsy said before opening the cupboard door.

“Oh my God. You were not kidding” Ryan laughed. He was learning so much about Lisa, he could see why Carla liked her so much.

Back in the kitchen Lisa and Carla were washing and drying up in a comfortable silence. Everything between them tonight had felt so natural. Neither of the pair felt like they had to force a conversation. It wasn’t until they could hear Ryan and Betsy laughing upstairs that the silence was broken.

“It’s nice how much they get on” Lisa said softly.

“It really is” Carla agreed.

“I wasn’t sure Betsy was going to take to this evening well” Lisa admitted.

“Why not?”

“Well, I know she asked you guys but I just wasn't sure if she was serious”

“You wanted to spend time with your daughter before you go back to work and she wanted to see you happy” Carla shrugged.

“I could have been happy without you and Ryan. I'm happy she invited you though. I wanted to spend time with you as well” Lisa admitted.

Carla was taken back at the honesty from Lisa. “Today was nice. I enjoyed today”

“Yeah, me too. For the first time in a while I’m actually not looking forward to going back to work”

“What not looking forward to locking up more bad guys”

Lisa laughed at Carla’s perception of her job. “If by bad guys you mean paper work and a lot of it then yeah can’t wait” Lisa said sarcastically.

“Stuck on paperwork duty then, are you, officially? I know you weren't sure earlier”

“Will be for a while yeah. Protocol after a suspension apparently. Work phoned me earlier to let me know.” Lisa sighed.

“Don’t like that part of the job?”

“It’s fine. Just not my favourite. There’s no excitement in doing paperwork”

“No risk either though” Carla said

“I don’t know. Paper cuts can be pretty deathly” Lisa replied.

“No one has ever died from a paper cut” Carla laughed leaning into Lisa.

“You’d be surprised” Lisa laughed looking up at Carla, biting her lip to try and repress a smile. They broke apart hearing a loud noise from upstairs and Betsy shouting sorry.

“Come on then, the rest of these dishes won’t wash themselves”

Meanwhile, upstairs, Betsy had found the game she wanted to play but didn’t make an effort to move.
“Ryan, can I ask you something?” Betsy said quietly as if she was sacred of what she was going to ask.

“Of course. You can ask me anything”

“Does Carla like my mum”

Ryan coughed. He did not expect that. “Honestly, Betsy I don’t know. She hasn’t spoken to me” Ryan lied. He knew that Betsy would need to have this conversation with Carla and Lisa, not with him.

“I think she does, and I think my mum likes her back” Betsy admitted.

“I think so too” Ryan replied

“I want my mum to be happy Ryan. I really do. But I’m scared”

“Scared? Why?”

“Carla has only liked men. My mum hasn’t been with anyone since my other mum. What if everything changes. I don’t want everything to change”

Ryan looked at Betsy with a sympathetic glance. “I think you need to talk to your mum, Carla too.”

“I’ll think about it” Betsy said walking downstairs. They had kept her mum and Carla waiting long enough. Finding a board game to play doesn’t take that long and she didn’t want her mum to get suspicious about anything.

It was midnight when Carla suggested that her and Ryan should head off back home. They had ended up playing multiple board games with the Swain duo winning most of the games. Carla however had won monopoly fairly easily and was very proud of herself. Betsy had fallen asleep on the sofa 10 minutes ago with Carla and Ryan quietly collecting their stuff.

“Thank you for such a lovely evening, Lisa. We really enjoyed it” Carla said reaching out to hug Lisa, careful of the detective’s bruises.

“Yeah, thanks for inviting me, Lisa. Was good fun” Ryan stated.

“I had a good time. It was nice to have some company in this house. Bets enjoyed the evening as well. Don’t remember the last time she felt relaxed enough to fall asleep on the sofa” Lisa smiled at Carla silently thanking Carla for everything she had done for her.

“The taxi should be here soon. I’ll wait outside. Bye Lisa, thanks again for a lovely evening.” Ryan said, leaving Carla alone to say her goodbyes.

Carla pulled Lisa into a hug. “I mean it ya know. I’ve had such a good time tonight.” Carla whispered into Lisa’s ear not wanting to break away from the hug.

“I know you meant it” Lisa whispered back. Neither Carla nor Lisa wanted to break the hug. They both were enjoying being in the company of the other person. The hug felt warm and comfortable. But most importantly, the hug felt safe.

“I should go, the taxi is here” Carla said.

“Yeah” Lisa sighed.

Carla gave Lisa one last squeeze before breaking the hug. “See you soon?” Carla asked.

“See you soon” Lisa confirmed. She waved bye to Carla and Ryan who was already in the taxi and shut her front door. Lisa rested her head against the door annoyed at herself. She should have asked if they wanted to stay. She has a spare bedroom after all. Lisa was silently kicking herself. She would have loved nothing more than to wake up to Carla’s company the next day. Maybe she would be brave enough next time Lisa thought to herself walking towards the living room to help Betsy up to bed. At least Lisa hoped there would be a next time. She’s got used to having Carla Connor in her life. She didn’t want to lose her anytime soon.

Chapter Text

Lisa has been awake for hours just staring up at her ceiling. She can’t bring herself to get out of bed. She hates this day. She wished this day didn’t have to exist. But it does. Becky died. And there was nothing Lisa could do about it. Not then and not now. It was 9am. Lisa knew that she would have to drag herself out of bed soon or she would stay there all day. And she couldn’t do that. Not his year. She promised Betsy they would deal with their grief together this year. She couldn’t break another promise to her daughter. Not when they were just starting to get on so well. They hadn’t even had an argument since she’d been back to work. Lisa knew she wasn’t actually doing much stressful work the past two days, but it was still progress. There was a knock at Lisa’s door, bringing the detective out of her thoughts and back to reality.

“Hi mum, I’ve made you a cup of tea and some toast” Betsy said kicking the door open with her foot, offering a sympathetic smile to her mum.

“Oh, thank you love. You didn’t have to; I didn’t even know you were up. I would have done this for you. I’m meant to be looking after you, you know” Lisa replied sitting up, patting the space in her bed next to her. Betsy took up the offer and sat next to her mum.

“You know you should let people look after you every once in a while” Betsy smiled sadly at her mum. Lisa pulled her daughter into a hug.

“I know love, I’m trying to get better at it” Lisa took a slice of toast and offered Betsy the other half. Betsy accepted the offer and began eating the slice she had made for her mother.

“How about we both get dressed and head out to some of your mum’s favourite spots?” Lisa asked looking at her daughter. “We could go to that breakfast café she used to love going to, the one with the fancy name for avocado on toast and figure out the rest of the day from there. Unless you have any ideas of your own?”

“You know I can’t even remember what they called it, all I remember is you calling it hipster toast and mum playfully smacking you” Betsy smiled at the memory.

“Yeah, I got a lot of those through the years. Sometimes I need to remind myself who you got your sarcasm from”

“I’d love to go to the café mum. And after I was thinking maybe we could go somewhere and just talk. I’d like to just talk to you. We haven’t done that a lot”

“I’m sorry” Lisa said looking at her daughter with a tear in her eye.

“It’s my fault too. I wasn’t the easiest to deal with”

“You were grieving. You’d lost your mum” Lisa said softly, stroking Betsy’s hair.

“And you had lost your wife. Someone you had been with for nearly 20 years. You were grieving too” Betsy said as a tear rolled down her cheek.

“We didn’t make the grieving process easy on each other did we” Lisa sighed, thinking about how horribly wrong she had got these past three years. She was so absorbed in her own grief she had neglected her daughter’s.

“No, we didn’t” Betsy said hugging her mum even tighter.

“Right let’s go get dressed. Both of us. I don’t know about you but I’m starving” Lisa said wiping her eyes.

“Yeah, I could eat” Betsy said slowly pulling away from her mum. She couldn’t remember the last time she had given her mum a proper hug. She made a mental note to hug her mum more. Her mum needed to know how much she meant to her.

Lisa looked at the building in front of her and took a deep breath. She hadn’t been here since Becky died. They used to come here together all the time for breakfast and lunch dates. They would take Betsy as often as they could.

“Do you think it’s the same owners? Do you think they would recognise us?” Betsy asked, opening the passenger door of the car.

“I’m not sure, maybe” Lisa said quietly opening her own car door. She silently wished for the owners to be different. She didn’t want to explain that the reason they’ve not been because Becky died. Lisa hates how people don’t know what to say to her once they find out she’s a widow. People just offer sorry glances and Lisa hates that. She just wants to feel normal.

As they reach the front door of the café, Lisa stops dead. She wasn’t sure if she could do this. This might have been too much for her. Lisa closes her eyes trying not to cry. Betsy turned around sensing there was something wrong with her mum.

“We can just stand outside for a bit if you want” Betsy offered

“Its still so hard going to places she used to love” Lisa said honestly.

“I know” Betsy said quietly. She knew her mum was trying her best. Everyone grieves differently and Betsy knows her mum would love nothing more than to just stay in bed all day. She knows her mum is trying her hardest to make today special for her.

“We can go home if you want” Betsy smiled sadly at her mum.

“No, I want to be here” Lisa turned to look at Betsy.

“Okay. I want to be here too” Betsy replied

“Come on let’s go in” Lisa said turning back towards the entrance. Lisa recognised that today was going to be a difficult day whatever they ended up doing. Lisa knew that she had to try and grieve more healthily this year. Not just for Betsy’s sake, for her sake as well.

Lisa and Betsy sat down as a table for two. Betsy picked up the menu and scanned for something to eat. She knew her mum loved this place, but she couldn't remember what she used to get. Probably just some toast or something. Everything on the menu was so fancy sounding.

“How did you know what anything meant”

“I didn’t. I trusted your mum to order for me the first ten times we were here until I found something I liked the best” Lisa smiled at the memory. She wasn’t exaggerating the story at all. The first ten times her and Becky had eaten at this café, Lisa had eaten ten different things on the menu. It was the tenth time when Becky had finally put her foot down and told Lisa that she must have found something she had liked by now. And of course, Lisa did. She had found something she liked after the first three visits, she just loved how intently Becky studied each item on the menu, carefully choosing something that she believed Lisa would have liked.

“What did I used to have?”

“Pancakes”

“What these vile sounding Ricotta and Lemon Pancakes?” Betsy screwed her nose up at the sound of them.

“Betsy don’t be rude” Lisa laughed showing her daughter she wasn’t actually upset with her. “And no, you just had normal pancakes, not everything here is posh and fancy”

“Could have fooled me”

“You going to try something knew or are you sticking with your plain old pancakes”

“If mum was still here? What would she order for us?”

“Well, your mum was always trying to get you to try new things so I reckon she would have ordered either a savoury croissant or an acai bowl. And for me she would have either been nice and ordered my favourite thing from here or found herself absolutely hilarious and ordered me the posh avocado on toast”

“You really have something against avocado toast” Betsy laughed. “I think I’ll have a savoury croissant. Maybe the BLT one or the ham one”

“I’ll go order love” Lisas said getting up. “I don’t trust you not to order me some hipster toast”

Betsy rolled her eyes at her mother. Who knew that someone could hate avocado toast that much.

“Breakfast was lovely, thank you mum”

“Yeah, it was good wasn’t it. We should come back more often”

“Really?” Betsy was shocked. She hadn’t expected her mum to suggest spending time at her other mum Becky’s favourite places. She assumed this would be a one and done thing. Only at places that hold memories of her mum because it was her death anniversary.

“Yes really. We enjoyed all these places once upon a time. We should start trying to enjoy them again”

“Mum, can I ask a question?”

“Of course, you can ask me anything Betsy, you know that right?”

“Mum died when I was thirteen, so why don’t I remember anything about this café”

Lisa sighed, knowing that she would have to tell her daughter the truth. “We stopped coming as a family when you were about 10, maybe 11. I was busy all the time with work, and your mum didn’t like coming alone. Sometimes I wish I took more time off.”

Betsy turned to her mum and gave her a big hug. Even though today was such an emotionally difficult day for both of them, she had never felt closer to her mum. These past few weeks have really helped to develop and improve their relationship. Betsy was starting to understand that she couldn’t be angry at her mum for ever. Not for the death of her other mum. Betsy tightened the hug contemplating whether she should tell her mum how much she means to her. Lisa put a bit of distance between the pair so she could look at Betsy but not enough that contact was broken.

“What would you like to do next kiddo?”

“Could we go to the park, near the cemetery. I want to just talk to you. About mum. About us. About the past three years. Then we could go see mum after?” Betsy suggested, hoping that her mum wanted to accept the fact that they needed to talk things through with each other.

“Okay. Let’s talk. Flowers before or after?”

“Flowers after. Want them to be fresh as possible when we lay them”

Lisa hooked her arm through her daughters, leading them both back to the car. She didn’t imagine she’d be in the right frame of mind to drive after talking to Betsy and visiting Becky so opted to drive back home first. They could walk to the park from the house. Could even get the bus a couple of stops if they time it right.

“Going to go home first if that’s alright Bets. Don’t want to drive after the cemetery”

Betsy nodded her head understanding what her mum was trying to say to her. The cemetery would be hard for the both of them. It would be different than last week. Last week was a celebration, today was more sombre. Today definitely hurt more.

Lisa and Betsy slowly strolled through the park gates. They were both wrapped up warm knowing that the sun would be setting soon. They had a couple of hours to talk before the park would inevitably close. Not wanting to sit on the wet grass, Lisa pointed towards a bench and suggested to Betsy that they should sit.

“Did you know, I used to sit at this bench all the time. Watching you and your mum running around like lunatics” Lisa said sitting down smiling at the memory.

“I remember running around a park. I didn’t know it was here”

“I would take a breather and just admire you two. You had such a strong relationship”

“We did too. We still do” Betsy said honestly sitting down next her mum. Lisa gave Betsy a questioning look. “Okay, maybe we don’t have the strongest relationships anymore, but we are getting better”

“We are. I’m so happy about that” Lisa said bringing her daughter into a side hug.

“Me too mum”

There was a comfortable silence that fell over the mother and daughter. They were happy to be in each other’s company.

Betsy broke the silence. “I’m glad that we’ve started talking to each other more”

“Me too love. I am so sorry for not always being there for you. And I know I’m saying that a lot lately, but I need you to know that I mean it”

“I know you do. And besides I’ve not exactly made it easy for you. Throwing away mum’s stuff when we were moving house, not turning up for college, getting involved with Joel just a few recent examples”

“I could have tried harder. Could have taken more time off work. I should have taken more time off work when Becky first died. You needed me. Instead, I through myself into case after case hoping it would distract me. And all it ended up doing was drive a wedge between me and you”

“It’s okay. I’m starting to understand better now”

“When did you get so mature huh? Where’s my stroppy, sarcastic, immature daughter gone”

“She’s taken a day off today” Betsy smirked.

“In all seriousness Betsy, your still just a kid. You have been so strong today, but you don’t have to be. All day you’ve worried about what I want to do and how I’m feeling. I need you to know that you can be sad too. You do not have to be strong for me. Not today. Not ever.”

“You don’t have to be strong for me either” Betsy replied. “I’m sixteen. I’m not a kid anymore. Well technically I am but what I’m trying to say is that its okay to be sad too. Mum died three years ago, and I’ve not seen you cry once, not since the funeral. Sometimes I felt like I was the only one that missed mum” Betsy looked up at her mum a tear threatening to spill.

“I was trying to protect you. I didn’t want you to see how broken I was. Got that one wrong didn’t I” Lisa laughed an empty laugh, her own eyes filling with tears.

“It made me angry” Betsy continued truthfully. “I was so angry all the time. I was angry at mum for dying. Angry at her for not thinking about the consequences. Angry at her for leaving me, us. And I was angry at you. Angry that you weren’t hurting like I was hurting. But most of all I was angry that you spent all your time doing the job that killed mum. I couldn’t understand why you would do that. Why you would want to do that. I was so so scared that I was going to lose you too. I still am sometimes. I still think that I’ll be at home or work or even at college and I’ll see someone in uniform walking towards me. And I’ll know. I’ll know you’ve been killed”

Both Betsy and Lisa were fully crying now. Lisa had no idea that her daughter felt like this. That her daughter was so scared that she was going to die and be all alone. Everything made sense now.

“Betsy listens to me” Lisa began taking her daughters head in her hands, ensuring that Betsy’s eyes were on her. “My job isn’t the safest; I know that you know that. But I promise you that I will never ever take unnecessary risks. I will follow every safety protocol. No more rushing into things without thinking about the consequences”

“Is that what mum did. Didn’t think about the consequences. Didn’t think about me or you”

“Your mum thought about you all the time”

“Then why did it happen”

“I don’t know love. I can’t answer that”

Betsy took a deep breath in trying to calm down. She could feel her frustration growing. “I struggle with my anger still. I don’t know how to deal with it. I don’t know how to not take it out on you”

“I think that maybe, therapy might be good for you. Me too. I need some help as well. I realise that now”

“Therapy? Isn’t that for people who are mentally ill or have gone through something traumatic”

“You have gone through something traumatic love”

“People die all the time”

“Doesn’t make it any less traumatic. If it wasn’t then grief counsellors would be out of a job wouldn’t they”

Betsy was deep in thought. It was like she was weighing up all the pros and cons in her head. Eventually Betsy moved away from her mum and stood up from the bench. “I’ll think about it. Not a yes but not a no”

“Okay, I’ll take that for now”

“Can we go get some flowers now? It’s getting late and I want to get some before all the shops close at 6”

“Come on then let’s go. Got any flowers in mind?” Lisa asked.

“Yeah but got to see the selection first. Can only buy what they’ve got” Betsy said sarcastically.

“Ah there’s my daughter. Where have you been all day?”

“Haha very funny” Betsy deadpanned

“I think I’m very funny thank you” Lisa responded, standing up from the bench ready to follow her daughter to the local florists. Lisa felt her phone vibrate from her pocket. Taking out her phone, Lisa could see that the message was from Carla. She bit her lip trying to supress a smile.

Carla [5:37] Just wanted to check in, see if you were okay. I know how tough this day is for you. Besty too. My door is always open if you need some space. Or just you know someone to talk to. A shoulder to cry on

Lisa smiled reading the message. Carla was so thoughtful. She had also manged to ramble over text which Lisa found endearing.

“Who is it?” Betsy asked bringing Lisa back to reality. They were almost at the florists now. Lisa debated whether to tell Betsy the truth. Her and Betsy had such a good day she definitely did not want an argument now. But not being honest was what ruined their relationship in the first place.

“Just Carla”

“Oh”

It was hard to miss the disappointment in Betsy’s voice.

“She was just asking how we were doing. Let me just reply to her, tell her that we are alright and then we will go and buy some flowers”

“Okay, I’ll meet you inside”

Lisa [5:43] Done lots of crying already and we’ve not even visited Becky yet. Thank you for the offer of coming round. Your good to me Carla. Its really kind of you but I promised Betsy that it would be just me and her today. I’ll see you soon though x

Lisa started overthinking sending the kiss. Do friends do that. She can’t remember. It has been so long since she’s had a friend. Lisa contemplated deleting the text and sending it again without the kiss.

Carla [5:44] It’s okay. I understand. Definitely see you soon x

Well, that put an end to her overthinking. Lisa put her phone back in her pocket and joined Betsy in the store.

“Found any you like?” Lisa said once she located Betsy.

“Yeah, there’s these really nice blue ones. Mum’s favourite colour”

“She would love them” Lisa said picking her own flowers to lay at the grave and taking Betsy’s off her so she could pay for both.

“So, when you off to see Carla then” Betsy said clearly upset.

“I don’t know. Tomorrow maybe. Most likely Monday as that’s when you’re working”

“Wait. You’re not seeing her today” Betsy asked shocked.

“No. I told you today was a day for you, me and your mum. Just us”

“I love you”

“I love you too Betsy”

Lisa took the flowers and handed Betsy the ones she picked. Lisa allowed herself to think about the future. She would be lying if she said the thought of spending this day with Carla one day didn’t cross her mind. Lisa knew that neither she nor Betsy was ready for that yet. But a person can dream.

Arriving at Becky’s grave, Betsy turned to her mum. “Do you mind if we speak to her alone at first?”

“If that’s what you want” Lisa told Betsy. Betsy nodded her head afraid that if she spoke, she’d burst into tears before she had a chance to speak to her mum. “Okay then, I’ll be over there. Give you some privacy.” Lisa walked away so that Betsy could talk to her mum without her listening in.

Betsy knelt down and laid her flowers next to the gravestone.

“I miss you mum. So much. It’s been three years, and it still doesn’t feel real. I don’t feel as angry at you anymore. The first year I really was. But that’s just because I love you so much. I didn’t want you to be gone.” Tears were streaming down Betsy’s face. “Things are getting better. Me and mum are definitely in a better place than we were this time last year. You’d be happy we were getting along again. Mums happier. She’s opening up more as well. Talking about her feelings. Feels like she’s actually a human being and not some robot that was built to fight crime. I’m getting my mum back. I’ve missed her. It doesn’t feel like both my parents died that night anymore”

Betsy wiped her eyes before continuing her conversation with her mum. “I hope your proud of me mum. I’ve done bad things this past year but I’m trying to make things right. I’m trying to take some responsibility for my actions. My job at the factory is going well. Carla says I’ve got talent. She thinks I could make it in the fashion industry if I focused. I think I’m really going to try. Start trying harder at college. I’m going to make you proud mum.” Betsy glanced over at her other mum who was awkwardly standing far away. “I’m going to let mum speak to you now. I love you. Forever and always.” Betsy walked towards her mum. She figured her mum could do with the same privacy she had.

“You okay Betsy?” Lisa asked noticing her daughters tear stained face.

“Yeah, I’m okay. Your turn” Betsy smiled at her mum.

Lisa took a deep breath, ambling toward Becky’s grave. It felt as though she were sinking into quicksand. This part never got any easier. Lisa always struggled to visit Becky—it was a painful reminder that Becky was really gone, that Lisa was a widow, and that this wasn’t just a recurring nightmare.

“Hey love, I miss you. I’ve really needed you this year. More than the others. It was like Betsy turned sixteen and decided to turn into a total nightmare” Lisa laughed, but it was a sad, shaky laugh. Tears began to well up in her eyes. “I wish you were here. You would have known what to do. You always knew what to do. You would have been so much better than me. I’ve really messed up with Besty. It was like no matter how hard I tried; I would just always make things worse. I guess it didn’t help that I surrounded myself with work. Betsy thought that work was more important than her. Can you believe that? I made her feel like that Becks. How could I have messed up that bad” The tears were streaming down Lisa’s face now.
“Things are starting to get better, though. Betsy and I… we’re turning a corner. Slowly, but we’re getting there. Our relationship is healing. It’s going to be hard—I know that. But I want to be better. For Betsy. For me, too. I’m thinking about going to therapy, Becks. I know, I know. You kept trying to get me to go for years. You were always going on about how beneficial it was for the police. And for what it’s worth, you were right. I think it’s really going to help.” Lisa took a deep breath, preparing herself for what she was about to say next. “I’m also thinking about stepping back from work for a while. Well not a step back per say, I still want to be DS Swain, I still want to solve cases, put away bad guys, the whole lot. I’m just thinking about cutting down my hours for a while. Take some annual leave. Properly heal. Like I should have done the first time. Time to show Betsy what grieving healthily looks like. Time to be a good example for Betsy. Time to be a better mother.”
Lisa wiped away her tears and took a deep breath. She hadn’t even realised she hadn’t placed down her flowers yet. “Sorry darling, these are for you” Lisa said, placing her flowers next to Betsy’s. “I love you so much. I hope you know that. I’m always going to love you. Like I’ve always said, I love you now, always and forever”

"Lisa glanced over at Betsy and signalled that she was done, letting her know she could come back to the grave if she wanted to. Betsy walked over and gave her mom a big hug. Neither of them spoke; the hug conveyed what a thousand words couldn’t. They stood there, holding each other in front of Becky’s grave, until they felt ready to go home.

“You ready to go kiddo?” Lisa asked softly.

“Yeah” Betsy said barely above a whisper.

“I love you Becky” Lisa said one last time

“Love you mum”

Lisa and Betsy walked away from Becky’s grave, arms around each other, drawing comfort from their shared presence. Both felt lighter than before, as if a heavy weight had been lifted from their shoulders. Neither of them would ever forget Becky—she meant too much to them. But maybe, just maybe, this was what they needed to heal: to find a way to move forward. To live with the loss of Becky, rather than letting it consume them.

Chapter Text

It had been a couple of days since the anniversary of Becky’s death. Lisa had felt like her and Betsy have really turned a corner. They have been trying to spend more time with each other, even if it is only to eat lunch together. Lisa understands that Betsy is a teenager and doesn’t want to spend every second of every day with her mum, so she’s pleased that Betsy is trying. As she’s not had a case on, she’s had a lot of free time, she’s spent plenty of time with Betsy but also with Carla. Lisa smiles at the thought of Carla. She spends a lot of time thinking about the factory owner now. It was as if Carla was an addictive drug. Lisa couldn’t get enough. She took a deep breath trying to gather her thoughts, her DI wanted to speak to her today and she definitely needed to have a clear mind for that.

It was as if Lisa had x-ray vision as she saw her DI, knocking on the door to her office.

“DS Swain is this a good time?” DI Castello asked

“Yes of course, I can finish this report later” Lisa said, stacking papers up to make her desk look slightly neater.

“There’s this case. Nothing big. Just a couple stolen cars. I was hoping you’d look into it. Ease you back into detective work”

“Of course, I’ll take it” Lisa said without hesitation. Normally she would hate being left with the low stake investigations, but Lisa knew that she was practically on a probation period. She had to be on her best behaviour, so she didn’t get suspended… again. Besides, it would be good to have a nice healthy distraction. Carla Connor has been on her mind for too long and it was beginning to affect her at work. Maybe a new case is just what Lisa needs to forget Carla, just for the time being.

“Right well I will go send you over the details” DI Castello said, turning to leave Lisa’s office.

When her DI was out of sight, Lisa allowed herself to break into a smile, thankful that she was finally taken off paperwork duty. Lisa sent a quick text to Betsy explaining that she was given a case so would have to pick Betsy up around 5pm instead of 4pm like she had been the past week. As she had a case, she couldn’t leave work early anymore. She had to show she was dedicated to the job. Lisa pocketed her phone and opened the email for Catello. She couldn’t wait to do some actual police work.

It was chaos at the factory. There was a big order in, and everyone was worried they wouldn’t fulfil it in time. It didn’t help that Betsy seemed to be working as slow as she possibly could. She had managed to snap at everyone before it had even turned 11am. Must be some sort of new record.

“Betsy my office now”

Betsy rolls her eyes but stands up and follows Carla back to the office. She really wasn’t in the mood for a telling off today.

“Right sit down and talk to me”

“What” Betsy was confused. She was expecting Carla to shout at her. Tell her how she was slacking and letting the team down. That she would have to hurry up and complete her order or she’d get someone else to do it for her.

“You’ve clearly got something on your mind love. Come on talk to me. What’s going on”

“Nothing”

“Boy trouble?”

“No, why would you say that”

“I was a teenager once you know”

“Well definitely not boy trouble” Betsy paused, contemplating whether or not to tell Carla what was bothering her. “It’s my mum” Betsy decided that she might as well confide in Carla. Even if Carla only wanted to get to the bottom of it so Betsy could go back to working.

“What about your mum?” Carla tried to hide the concern in her voice. She has come to really care about Lisa. She didn’t want anything bad to have happened to her.

“She texted saying she was going to be picking me up later today. She’s been given a case to work on” Betsy said not lifting her eyes up from the spot on the floor.

“That’s a good thing isn’t it love? You mum gets to do the bit of the job she loves again”

“Yeah, and I’m happy for her I am but she’s already picking me up an hour later. How quick will it turn into I’m staying late can you make your own way back home or can you stay at a mate’s house as I won’t be back home till the late evening. How long until she doesn’t have time for me again” Betsy said quietly. She’s not used to voicing her fears. Usually, Betsy would opt for bottling up her feelings and acting out, but she promised her mum she would try and improve her behaviour. If her mum wasn’t going to keep her end of the deal, then Betsy still wanted to try and keep hers.

“Oh love, I am sure that is not going to happen. Your mum is so happy that you are spending more time with each other, that you are arguing less and less. Honestly sometimes you are all she talks about. You mean the world to your mum; she is not going to let her job effect that”

“How do you know that. It’s happened before”

“Betsy you are you mums’ number one priority. Even if you don’t think that’s the case. You need to remember that okay. You will always come first for your mum. If you don’t believe me, ask her yourself. In fact, promise me you’ll talk to her about this. She needs to know how you are feeling”

“Okay, I’ll talk to her when she gets home tonight”

“Good, now get back to work. I need to see some serious improvement in your speed this afternoon”

Betsy stands up from the chair. “Yes boss” she breaths out an airy laugh. She had a good relationship with Carla. Betsy started walking towards the office door but turned around before she reached the handle.

“Thank you, Carla, for everything. Your always there when I need you. Always there when my mum needs you. I’m thankful you’ve come into our lives” Betsy didn’t wait to hear a response. She opened the door and walked back to her workstation and immediately started working faster.

Carla was left smiling to herself. She was happy she was in the Swain’s lives as well. She had grown fond of Betsy and Lisa well Carla just couldn’t seem to get the detective out her mind. She took a deep breath and forced herself to get back on with her work.

“Knock knock” Ryan said while walking straight into Carla’s office and sitting down opposite her.

“Does no one wait for come in anymore” Carla said frustrates, slamming some papers down on her desk.

“Sorry, you were the one that invited me round for lunch since I didn’t come home last night”

“Yes sorry, stressful day” Carla told Ryan. She didn’t mean to snap at him.

“What’s up with you, you haven’t even asked where I was last night yet”

Carla rolled her eyes “Where were you last night Ryan”

“I got lucky” he said with a smug smile on his face.

“Good for you” Carla rolled her eyes again, wishing that she didn’t invite Ryan for lunch.

“No seriously what’s up with you, you’re in a mood”

“I am not in a mood”

“Tell your face that then”

Carla shot Ryan a dirty look causing Ryan to hold his arms up in mock surrender.

“If you must know I’m thinking about how I am getting absolutely no work done at the moment. Too blimmin distracted”

“Distracted about what… or who should I say” Ryan dares to smirk at his auntie.

“Yes, okay this about Lisa, happy now?”

Ryan taps the table in front of him. “Come on tell me what’s going on. Something’s clearly bothering you”

“I don’t know”

“You don’t know what?”

“Don’t know what to say. I like her, you know that already. I just feel like I’m in such uncharted waters. I don’t know what I’m doing”

“You know any relationship can feel like that. No matter who it’s with” Ryan suggested

“True”

“And I mean your never going to know what it’s like if you’re not even bothered to try” Ryan continued.

“I don’t know Ryan. I don’t know what I’m doing. This feels different. I’m not used to this”

“Carla you are one of the most stubborn people I know but even you are outdoing yourself on this one. I mean your Carla Connor. You don’t wait around on the off chance you get what you want. No. You go for what you want. Even if it is risky. Because you know that even a little bit of happiness is worth fighting for. You like her. You fancy her. You never stop going on about her. So go for it women.”

“What if I make things awkward between us Ryan. What if I’ve completely misread the whole situation and we really are just friends. What if- ”

Ryan cut Carla off “You complete overthink when it comes to Lisa. Do I need to remind you who you are. Because from what I remember Carla Connor doesn’t do regrets. And besides, I think not going for it with Lisa will be your biggest regret”

“Your right. I would regret it”

“So go get woman, see where it goes” Ryan tapped the table excitedly.

“I’ve got work to do I can’t just up and leave” Carla said reaching for her phone. “But I am going to speak to her, today” Carla clarified.

“Good” Ryan said getting up. “I’ve said all I’ve needed to say. I’ll leave you to your precious work”

Carla typed and deleted her message multiple times. She didn’t want to sound desperate, but she didn’t want Lisa to decline her offer either. She finally decided on a message to send. Simple, direct, not too flirty. She just hoped Lisa would say yes.

Lisa was on her lunch break. She had spent the whole day investigating the stolen cars. They definitely seemed to be linked which was exciting. Means that the case was more complicated than first thought. Her train of thought was broken when she heard her personal phone buzz. She picked up straight away just encase it was about Betsy.

Carla [12:57] Would you want to come over for dinner tonight? x

Lisa smiled at the text, feeling a blush rise to her cheeks. Get a grip she told herself. Her friend was just inviting her for dinner. Nothing more. As much as she wishes it was more. Lisa wasn’t stupid. She could tell that she had feelings for Carla. As much as she wants to stop them. As much as she wants to put her walls up and forget that Carla Connor even existed, she can’t. Selfishly she likes spending time with Carla. She likes the evening in the pub or the wine nights at Carla’s flat. She likes that she can walk into the factory at any time. She likes that Betsy is getting on so well with Carla. Lisa shakes her head trying to stop thinking about Carla. Carla seems to be all she thinks about at the moment. It scares her. She hasn’t opened her heart this much since Becky died. She almost forgot how it felt to be Lisa first and DS Swain second. These past few years she has been DS Swain only; Lisa has barely been herself. Lisa decided that she should actually text Carla back. Carla couldn’t read minds.

Lisa [1:13] I would love to. When are where x

Carla [1:15] My place, if that’s alright. I was thinking we could just have a takeaway. I don’t fancy going out tonight x

Lisa [1:16] That’s good with me. As long as it’s not sushi x

Carla [1:16] I can’t believe you are so against sushi! It’s delightful! x

Lisa [1:16] It’s raw fish. It’s automatically disgusting x

Carla [1:17] You don’t know what you’re missing x

Lisa [1:18] I’ll stick to my cooked meat thanks. You know how it’s meant to be consumed x

Carla [1:18] You are so dramatic x

Lisa [1:18] You wouldn’t have me any other way x

Carla [1:18] Your right I wouldn’t x

Lisa smiled down at her phone. Her break would be over, and she would have to go back to work in a minute. Was Carla flirting with her? Is this how people flirt over text? Lisa groaned. She was seriously overthinking this.

Lisa [1:19] I have to go now. I’ve got to actually do my job unfortunately. I’ll pick up the food on my way to yours. Just text what you want x

Carla [1:19] Are you saying I’ve kept THE DS Swain from her job. I’m flattered x

‘That had to be flirting right?’ Lisa thought to herself.

Lisa [1:19] I’ll see you later Carla, don’t miss talking to me too much now x

Lisa pressed send before she could overthink her awful attempt at flirting back.

Carla [1:20] I’ll see you later Lisa x

Lisa was struggling to wipe the smile off of her face. I mean she was a police detective, at work, fighting crime, there was nothing to smile about here. But she just couldn’t help herself. her mind kept wondering back to Carla and their text messages. Lisa bit the inside of her cheek trying to compose herself. She would be lying is she said she wasn’t happy to be spending all this time with Carla, but she was acting like a lovesick teenager. She needed to start acting her age Lisa thought to herself. She also needed to get on with her job, so she left the break room and went back to her office. This case wasn’t going to solve itself.

Carla was nervous. She wasn’t exactly sure how this evening was going to go. There was the potential that this was the start of something beautiful. There was also the chance that this evening would be the end of her friendship with Lisa Swain. As much as she didn’t want to think about that Carla knew that if she let her feelings slip then there was always a chance that Lisa didn’t feel the same way. Carla was trying her hardest not to overthink, but it was easier said than done. She started off the evening by going through her entire wardrobe trying to find something to wear. She didn’t want to be too casual, but she definitely didn’t want to be too dressed up. This wasn’t a date. And besides, Lisa would be coming straight from work. Carla tried on four different outfits before she finally settled on a loose black top. Carla was bought out of her thoughts by the buzzing noise of the intercom. She walked over to let Lisa in without even lifting the phone.

“Do I not get a hello anymore” Lisa questioned, her lips curling upwards into a smirk.

“Sorry, wanted to get some plates out, you know with ordering a Chinese and everything. Can’t really eat it from the box” Carla said nervously, silently cursing herself that she couldn’t even be a good house guest and say hello.

“I was just messing. Are you okay? You seem tense” Lisa asked, worried about Carla.

“Yes, I’m fine. Just a little stressed from work. Big orders coming in now it’s the lead up to Christmas” Carla said trying to put off the conversation she needed to have with Lisa as long as possible.

Lisa placed the takeaway on the table and began to help Carla distribute the food. “Right well you would tell me if something else was bothering you wouldn’t you”

“Yeah of course” Carla turned to face Lisa flashing her a smile.

“Okay good. Thought you’d forgotten we were friends or something” Lisa laughed.

Carla’s heart sank a little at that word. Friends. Is that really all this was to Lisa. Just friends? Do just friends do this with each other. Carla wasn’t so sure. On the other hand, though, Carla wasn’t sure if they were more than friends. They certainly weren’t in a relationship. Maybe friends was the only word that could be used to describe what they are at the moment. Carla sat down across from Lisa aware that the last time her and Lisa were sat at this table their almost moment occurred.

“Penny for your thoughts” Lisa asked staring intently at Carla

“Think there’s more than a penny’s worth up there” Carla retorted causing Lisa to laugh.

“You don’t have to tell me if you don’t want to. But I’m here to listen when you want me” Lisa said sincerely, maintaining eye contact with Carla.

“Thank you, I appreciate it. Think I’ll sit with these feeling for a little. Not ready to share”

“Well, if you’re not ready to share your feelings, then you must at least share your chips. You’ve kicked all the good ones. Last time I let you plate up” Lisa joked, noticing Carla’s need to change the subject.

“No way, these are mine” Carla eyed the detective carefully, jokingly glaring at her. Before Carla could react, Lisa was reaching across the table and taking a chip off of Carla’s plate.

“Hey” Carla shouted slapping Lisa’s hand away. “You’ve got your own”

Lisa ate the chips she stole from Carla’s plate. “I was right! Yours taste so much better than mine!” Lisa exclaimed.

“That can’t be true” Carla said reaching out for a chip on Lisa’s plate, slightly worried that the detective was right, and Carla had selfishly taken all the good-looking chips. Lisa was looking at Carla with what Carla could only describe as a look of endearment. “Lisa, these taste the exact same!” Carla responded amused at the small blonde detective in front of her.

“No, they definitely taste better coming off of your plate” Lisa smirked reaching for another chip.

“Leave off will ya, eat your own food” Carla rolled her eyes, smiling like a chesire cat at the sound of Lisa laughing.

“What are you smiling so wide at” Lisa asked, genuinely curious as to what Carla was so happy about.

“You, your laugh. I like hearing you laugh” Carla said surprising herself at her honesty.

It was Lisa’s turn to smile as she turned to the side hoping to hide her growing blush from Carla. “I like hearing you laugh too” the detective stated somewhat awkwardly looking back in Carla’s direction.

The conversation between Carla and Lisa flowed so effortlessly throughout dinner. They both talked about work and how the factory will be super busy for the foreseeable future. How Lisa was happy to be investigating actual crimes, even if they were low risk ones. They were happy to be in each other’s company talking about anything and everything. No matter how small or insignificant the topic seemed.

“My back is killing me. Want to move onto the sofa? Can do the dishes later” Carla suggested, hoping that Lisa would take the hint. If Carla was being honest, she just wanted to be closer to Lisa. She didn’t want a table in between them.

Carla and Lisa’s conversation had flowed just as effortlessly on the sofa. It just felt right. Carla felt as though she could speak to Lisa about anything and vice versa for Lisa. Carla had felt the urge to reach for the wine and have a drink for some courage, but Carla knew she had to be sober for what she truly wanted to say this evening. She didn’t want to give Lisa any way to turn this on her. To try and say it was just because of the alcohol again.

“Are you seriously okay Carla? Your stuck in your thoughts again” Lisa said laced with concern.

“Your beautiful” Carla managed to breath out

“What?” Lisa was taken by surprised not sure whether she had heard Carla correctly.

“I said your beautiful” Carla said more confidently this time, looking into Lisa’s eyes.

“And that’s what you were thinking about?” Lisa was confused.

Carla took a deep breath, preparing herself. Fuck it. She was going to take Ryan’s advice. She was going to tell Lisa how she felt. She was going to see where this goes.

“I think about you all the time Lisa. When I’m at home, in the morning, when I’m at work. I think about you when I should be relaxing, in the evening when all I want to do is sleep. You consume my thoughts Lisa”

“I – I don’t understand” Lisa said turning her body, so she was as close to Carla as physically possible.

“I like you, Lisa. You mean more to me than just a friend. You mean more to me then everyone in my life” Carla breathed out aware of how close Lisa was. If Lisa couldn’t figure out what Carla was trying to say, then maybe she would have to show her. Carla leant in and captured Lisa’s lips in her own, kissing her softly. The kiss was full of passion and longing, built up tension from the past month.

Carla pulled away smiling, slowly opening her eyes and meeting Lisa’s. Oh. That was not the look she wanted to see from Lisa. The panic was evident in Lisa’s face. Carla’s breathing automatically began to increase. She had messed up. She had ruined her friendship with Lisa. She didn’t even ask if she could kiss her. She just assumed that it was okay.
‘Stupid, stupid, stupid. How could she be so stupid’ Carla thought to herself. She was spiralling, her mind racing. Lisa hasn’t said anything. Why hasn’t she said anything.

“Carla” Lisa said gently. “Look at me” Lisa used her hand to pull Carla’s gaze up from the floor. “You caught me by surprise. I wasn’t expecting that”

“Sorry. We can just forget about it if you want to” Carla offered trying to salvage what was left of her friendship.

“I don’t want to forget it. In fact…” Lisa paused bringing her hand back to Carla’s face, pulling Carla closer. “I’d quite like to do it again” Lisa managed to breathe out before their lips crashed back together. This kiss was far more sensual than the last. Both Carla and Lisa hungry for more of each other. Wanting to explore each other. They pull apart, needing some air. Lisa bit her lip, her eyes darken, lust threatening to take over. Lisa hadn’t kissed anyone, hadn’t been intimate with anyone for over three years. This was overwhelming for her, but she was glad she was with Carla. Lisa leant back in; she didn’t want to let the moment go. She wanted to stay here, kissing Carla forever.

Carla groaned as Lisa’s phone buzzed. “Ignore it, let’s head to the bedroom” Carla wanted Lisa, and she wanted Lisa now. Lisa ignored Carla’s request and picked up her phone, seeing a message from Betsy asking when her mum was going to be home as she didn’t want to go to bed without saying goodnight. The message was like a snap back to reality for Lisa. She couldn’t stay in this safe bubble with Carla forever. Lisa’s phone screened changed as she locked her phone. Betsy had set up a slideshow for her so that her lockscreen changed every time her phone locked. This time her lockscreen was a picture of young Betsy with Becky. Guilt hit Lisa in an instant. What was she doing. How could she do that to Becky? It had only been three years. That’s not a very long time. And Betsy. What would Betsy think. This would totally destroy any progress they had made with each other.

“I have to go” Lisa whispered, her eyes filling with tears.

“What, why?” Carla questioned, silently kicking herself for sounding so desperate.

“I can’t do this. I’m not ready to do this. I’ve got Betsy to think about an all” Lisa rambled.

“Lisa please don’t do this. Don’t let Betsy dictate your life. She’s just a kid”

“She’s a kid that lost her mother. Far too soon. I’ve got to think about her. She’s got to be my priority”

“And what about you Lisa. Don’t you deserve to be happy” Carla was practically begging Lisa to think this through. To not end whatever this was before this started.

“I can’t do this Carla. I’m sorry. I think we should keep our distance for the foreseeable”

“Lisa give us a chance”

“I’m sorry, I can’t. This is for the best” Lisa rushed out of Carla’s flat, her footsteps fast. It was clear that Lisa couldn’t wait to get out of there.

Carla leant back on the sofa, looking up at the ceiling. She bit her lip trying to fight back tears. She was not going to cry over Lisa Swain. She was not going to cry over a policewoman. She wouldn’t. she couldn’t. Carla got up and got ready to go to bed for an early night. She didn’t feel like staying awake right now. She’d either end up crying or saying something she didn’t mean. It was best for everyone if she went to bed now. And so, she left the dirty plates in the sink and headed for bed. Everything that happened tonight was now an issue for tomorrow.

Chapter Text

Carla was having a bad morning. She had barely slept last night; replaying what happened with Lisa over and over again. Trying to think what she could have done differently. What she could have done to make Lisa stay.

“You alright? You look like a zombie” Ryan stated looking at his aunt. She was wearing a hoodie. He can’t remember the last time he had seen Carla in a hoodie. Things must be bad.

“Thanks for that Ryan”

“Come on. Talk to me. What’s going on” Ryan said softly. It was no secret how much his auntie meant to him. He was seriously worried about her.

“We kissed”

“YOU WHAT” Ryan shouted, immediately bringing his hands to his mouth. He didn’t mean to sound so shocked and excited.

“She walked out”

“Carla…” Ryan said sympathetically

“We kissed. I told her I liked her. And then she walked out”

“I’m sorry”

“Why are you sorry. It’s not your fault”

“I pushed you to go for it, didn’t I”

“Its not your fault” Carla reiterated.

“You going to wait a few days? Try again?”

“No”

“What. That’s not the Carla Connor I know”

“It’s for the best. Everyone has baggage but her...? Lisa’s baggage is overwhelming. There’s so much she still has to work on. Too much hassle if you ask me” Carla says before taking a swig of water walking towards her front door.

“If you say so”

“I do say so Ryan now would you move out of the way of the door. I’m late for work”

Ryan moved out of the way of the door letting Carla walk out and storm down the stairs. He knew there was no stopping Carla or making her change her mind. She was very stubborn when she wanted to be. This was going to be one of those times. It was understandable why. She opened her heart up to Lisa and it got thrown back in her face. Ryan couldn’t blame Carla for how she was feeling. He just wished he could take some of her hurt away.

Lisa was in full DS Swain mode. She had been uptight ever since she had left Carla’s last night. Her and Betsy had an argument this morning. It was Lisa’s fault she knew that. She had snapped at Betsy for practically no reason at all. She just couldn’t stop herself. She knew she had to make it up to her daughter and so invited her out for lunch. She hoped that she’d be able to apologize, and they could move past their argument.

“Sarge”

“WHAT PC Tinker” Lisa snapped again. She had been like this at work all morning. She had felt bad. It wasn’t Craig’s fault that she was upset. That she couldn’t control her emotions.

“Er… sorry Sarge. Just got the papers you asked for” Craig said tentatively. He didn’t want to say the wrong thing and set DS Swain off again.

“Thanks. Just leave them on my desk” Lisa breathed out. “Please” She added. She didn’t need to be rude.

“Betsy what are you doing here? I said I would meet you at Roy’s” Lisa said surprised to see her daughter walking into her office.

“Needed to get away from Carla. She’s being a right cow today. Bit like you this morning actually” Betsy said carefully, trying not to say the wrong thing.

“Betsy. Don’t be rude” Lisa warned

Betsy rolled her eyes “What like you this morning?”

“I’m sorry about that. I shouldn’t have shouted at you”

“No, you shouldn’t have. What’s wrong”

“Nothing wrong”

“Bullshit”

“Betsy! Language!”

“Sorry mum but you can’t expect me to believe there is nothing going on. You were with Carla most of the evening and then you come home in a bad mood. You wake up in a bad mood. You don’t come into the factory as normal. And to top it all off Carla is in an even worse mood”

“Betsy like I said before there is nothing going on”

“STOP LYING TO ME” Betsy shouted. She was agitated now. She wasn’t a little kid anymore. She wanted to know what was going on. Especially if it was making her mum so sad again. She was only just getting her mum back. She didn’t want to lose her mum. Not again.

“Betsy I’m not lying”

Lisa couldn’t even finish the rest of her sentence before Betsy was shouting again. “You know what, forget about lunch. If you can’t tell me the truth, then don’t bother talking to me at all” Betsy said before storming out of the police station and making her way back to the factory.

Lisa stood there dumbfounded trying to wrap her head around what had just happened. Her hands made their way to her temple. She massaged gently. So much for rebuilding her relationship with Betsy. Two arguments by lunch time. They were going for a new record today. Lisa picked up the files on her desk. There was no point taking a lunch break now she wasn’t having lunch with Betsy. She might as well continue her work.

Betsy wasn’t in the mood to go back to work. Carla was as depressing her mum, and she did not want to be around that. She found herself outside of the pub debating whether or not to walk in. She knows she’ll be kicked out quite fast since she was only 16 and was not with anyone over the age of 18 but she needed to talk to Ryan. Betsy got on with Ryan the couple of time they had met. He seemed like a nice, honest person so Betsy hoped that he had a vague idea of what was going on with her mum and her boss. Before Betsy could open the doors of the pub, the person she was looking for walked out. Perfect timing Betsy thought.

“Hi Ryan” Betsy called out

“Hi Swain Junior, shouldn’t you be at work?” Ryan questioned knowing that Carla was complaining all morning about the possibility of seeing Lisa while she was dropping off Betsy.

“Had an argument with my mum. Carla is all stroppy as well. Don’t want to deal with that thanks”

“Come on Carla can’t be that bad” Ryan tried to reason with Betsy, but it was clear he was failing by the look on Betsy’s face.

“I’m surprised she still has people working in that factory. She’s managed to snap at pretty much everyone”

“Sounds like Carla” Ryan laughed. The teenager in front of him didn’t know half of what Carla was capable of.

“Yeah, well not the Carla I know. What’s wrong with her”

“Nothing’s wrong with her. Carla is just like that sometimes” Ryan said, inwardly cringing at the bad excuse. Betsy caught him off-guard, and he had no idea what to say. He couldn’t exactly tell Betsy that his auntie was in a bad mood because her mum had kissed her and then broke it off. He thought that would cause the teenager to react badly and he couldn’t do that to both Carla and Lisa. No this was a conversation that Lisa needed to have with her daughter. He was going to stay out of this.

“You know something. I can tell” Betsy persisted. It was clear to her that Ryan wasn’t telling the whole truth. It was frustrating her that everyone seemed to be lying to her today. she was sixteen, she could handle the truth.

“I don’t know anything Betsy. If I do you will be one of the first people, I tell” Ryan flashed a sympathetic smile. He hoped that would get Betsy off his case.

“Your lying! Just like everyone else!” Betsy shouted in frustration. She turned away from Ryan not saying goodbye. Betsy was in a rush to get away from Ryan; she needed some time alone with her thoughts.

“Oi watch where your going” a voice called out to Betsy. She had walked into someone. In her rush, she wasn’t looking where she was going and collided with someone. She had hoped that they would just ignore it but that didn’t seem to be the case. Betsy looked up to see who she walked into, rolling her eyes once she realised who it was.

“Shouldn’t have been in the way then Mason should you” Betsy spat out clearly not happy that she had run into Mason. Things had been awkward between them for a while now. Betsy wasn’t sure how to act round him anymore.

“Are you alright?” Mason asked looking Betsy up and down. It was clear there was something on Betsy’s mind.

“Why do you care?” Betsy questioned, a sharp edge to her tone.

“We are friends you know or well we were friends. Before you know setting me up and the Joel murder case. I do still care about you” Mason insisted. He wanted Betsy to know that she did have someone to talk to.

“Its my mum”

“When is it not” Mason said in jest. He smiled at Betsy. He secretly wished that this conversation would be the start of their friendship again.

“I’m being serious” Betsy complained.

“Okay, okay. Sorry. Go ahead. Explain everything” Mason retorted holding his hands up in mock defeat.

“I think something has happened between my mum and Carla”

“What makes you say that?”

“Well, they’ve been finding any excuse to talk to each other recently. They’ve been kinda flirty with each other. I don’t think they think that anyone else has noticed. My mum went round to Carla’s last night”

“What’s the problem then? Not want your mum to move on”

“Well, I didn’t at first. I don’t want my mum to be forgotten. But I’ve not seen my mum so happy in years. It’s nice to have my mum back you know”

“Not sure I understand what’s wrong”

“Something happened between them last night. I know it. No one is telling me anything”

“Maybe nothings happened then”

“No. My mum was so snappy this morning. Practically refused to come into the factory when she dropped me off. And Carla has been a right cow bag today. She’s not asked about my mum at all. Ryan lied to me as well”

“Right so to summarise, they aren’t talking to each other and it’s making them both moody”

“Yes”

“Sounds like they just need to talk to each other then”

“Oh, he’s a genius. How did I not think of that” Betsy said, sarcasm dripping from her voice.

“Just lock em in a room or summink. Make em talk to each other” Mason matched Betsy’s sarcasm.

Betsy’s eyes lit up at that suggestion. “You know what that might actually work”

“I was just joking” Mason clarified.

“Yeah, I know but I think it might actually work”

“Well, I’m not going to stop you”

“As if you could” Betsy smirked, beginning to walk away from Mason. “I’ll text you later” she shouted back towards him. She was thankful for her talk with Mason. She managed to clear her head and come up with a plan to fix her mums and Carla’s relationship.

It was nearly time to close the factory, and Carla had barely got any work done today. the factory was behind schedule, and it didn’t help that Betsy came back from lunch late and left early. Carla didn’t stop her. She didn’t have the energy to stop her. Not today. She’ll deal with Betsy another day. Carla closed her eyes and massaged her temples. She could feel a stress headache coming on. She knows that she should go home and sleep it off, but she needed to try and do some work. Try and be productive for the last little bit of the day. Carla picked up her phone to find that she had an unread message from the person she least expected. Lisa.

Lisa [5:47] We need to talk.

Carla couldn’t believe it. How did Lisa have the nerve. No. Carla was not speaking to Lisa. She slammed her phone back on the desk and picked up some paperwork. Her phone had vibrated three more times. She didn’t want to pick the phone up. In fact, she tried her hardest not to pick the phone up. But there was just this overwhelming force urging her to pick up that phone. It couldn’t be ignored… she picked the phone back up

Lisa [5:53] Please Carla
Lisa [5:54] Talk to me
Lisa [5:54] Please. We need to talk about this

Carla had never seen Lisa so desperate before. Maybe she really did want to sort things. Maybe she had a chance to reflect on last night.

Carla [5:59] I’ll be in the factory for another couple of hours

Lisa [5:59] Okay

Okay? What the hell did okay mean? Okay she would come round the factory? Okay she’d speak to her another time? Carla slammed her phone back onto the desk. She was surprised she hadn’t broken that thing by now. She picked back up her paperwork and tried to focus ack on work. She had to at least try and catch up on some work.

“Why do we need to go to the factory Betsy” Lisa questioned

“Forgot my charger” the teenager innocently replied

“Okay well I’ll just stay out here, and you can go in and get it. Fast as you can yeah?” Lisa said hoping that her daughter would take the hint, and that Lisa didn’t want to risk bumping into Carla.

“Help me look for it please mum. Four eyes are better than two” Betsy smiled towards her mum.

“That is not the saying” Lisa rolled her eyes at her daughter, slowly forcing herself to move towards the factory doors. She did not want to be here. She was not ready to face Carla again. Not after yesterday. Lisa was being selfish, she knew that. It was selfish of her to kiss Carla and leave like it meant nothing. It was selfish of her to be avoiding Carla. Lisa just hoped that they could find Betsy’s charger and leave before she had to have an awkward conversation with Carla. She was not ready for that. Her head was all over the place.

“Betsy I can’t see your charger anywhere” Lisa exclaimed, not wanting to be on the factory floor for long. No one was working anymore; the factory was empty. Lisa did not want to be here long. She was broken out of her thoughts by Betsy rushing past her.

“Sorry Mum. This is for your own good” Betsy shouted before shutting the factory door and locking it behind her. A sense of dread fell over Lisa. There was no way this was happening. Why did Betsy have to do this? Lisa walked over to the doors and tried to pull them open. Lisa let out a frustrated breath when the doors didn’t open. She banged on the doors pleading for Betsy to let her out; not caring about the amount of noise she was making.

“What is going on here?” Carla said coming out of her office. She would be lying if she said she wasn’t confused at the sight in front of her. She wasn’t expecting to see Lisa today and definitely not in her factory. If she was being truthful, she didn’t want to see Lisa. She was still hurt about everything that had happened last night. How she had a glimpse of being happy, of having the detective be more than a friend to her. And how fast that was ripped away from her.

Lisa took a few deeps breaths before turning around to face Carla. This was not how she imagined seeing Carla again. “Bets has locked me in” Lisa said bluntly, hoping that Carla got the message that she didn’t want to talk.

“Don’t panic. I can let you out” Carla said going back to her office to collect her keys. When Carla got to her office, she realised that she couldn’t find her keys anywhere. She could have sworn she had left them on her desk. Admitting defeat, Carla went to the draw where she always kept a spare key. She could worry about where her own keys were later. She just needed to get Lisa out of her sight before she broke down in front of the DS. ‘This can’t be happening’ Carla thought to herself when she realised her spare keys had gone missing as well. This had Betsy written all over it. Begrudgingly, Carla walked back to Lisa at the front door of the factory.

“My keys are missing” She stated bluntly, avoiding eye contact with Lisa

“You’re kidding” Lisa breathed out, frustration evident in her tone. “Betsy let me out now. I mean it” She shouted through the door hoping that her daughter could hear her.

“No. Not until you two sort out whatever it is that is wrong. I’m not stupid. You’ve both been moping around all day. I know something happened” Betsy shouted back

“Betsy just let your mum out” Carla tried more softly, hoping that Betsy would unlock the door.

“TALK” Betsy replied.

Both Carla and Lisa sighed recognising that Betsy was not going to let them out any time soon. This was not how either of them would imagine their evening going. An awkward silence fell over the pair. Neither knowing where they stood with each other or how badly broken their friendship had become. Carla was first to break the silence. She figured that Betsy was right; if they were locked in, they might as well talk things through. Try and salvage any part of their friendship as they could.

“Want to move to my office? More comfortable in there” Carla offered, still refusing to look Lisa in the eyes.

“Yeah, might as well” Lisa smiled sadly. She was not amused with the situation Betsy had put her in. She wasn’t even sure what to say to Carla. She wasn’t sure how she could make this better between them. The lines between friendship and something more had been blurred and Lisa wasn’t sure if they could get back to being just friends.

They had been in the office for a good 10 minutes. Neither had spoken a word to each other. Lisa was on her phone messaging Betsy and telling her to let her out. Carla was staring at files on her desk trying to make herself look busy. She wasn’t doing any work. In fact, she was reading the same sentence over and over again. Lisa was the first to break the silence.

“I’m sorry” Lisa said putting her phone back in her pocket. It was clear that Betsy wasn’t going to let them out so she might as well make it up to Carla.

“Well as long as your sorry” Carla said sarcastically.

“I shouldn’t have kissed you”

“Don’t say sorry again”

“I am sorry. If I hadn’t kissed you back then we wouldn’t be in this mess”

“Wow thanks. Way to make a girl feel special”

This conversation was going to be more difficult than Lisa realised. A silence fell over the pair again. Lisa wasn’t sure what else to say.

“I’m sorry too you know. I should have checked it was okay to kiss you” Carla said. It was her turn to break the silence.

Lisa’s head snapped up. Surely Carla knew that she had done nothing wrong. She searched Carla’s eyes trying to figure out if Carla head meant what she had said. “You have absolutely nothing to be sorry about”

“I kissed you first. I should have thought about how you would feel. Should have thought that you’d obviously feel obligated to kiss back”

Lisa couldn’t believe what she was hearing. She didn’t mean to make Carla feel so bad about herself. She didn’t mean to make Carla feel like she forced herself upon her. How had she gotten it so wrong. “I didn’t feel obligated to kiss you back. I kissed you because I wanted to” Lisa said honestly. She was done being selfish. She had hurt Carla more than she realised. She didn’t want Carla to feel like that anymore; she needed to be honest. Even if it scared her.

“You wanted to kiss me?” Carla said quietly, barely above a whisper. “You mean that, you’re not just saying that to make me feel better”

“I wanted to kiss you, Carla. I’m sorry you thought otherwise. I’m sorry that I’ve made you feel like this was your fault. I was just scared. Terrified even”

Carla looked up meeting Lisa’s eyes for the first time that evening. “Why were you sacred. I’m sorry if I made you uncomfortable at any point”

“It’s got nothing to do with you” Lisa tried her best to reassure Carla.

“Then why” Carla whispered. She was afraid if she spoke any louder then she’d freak Lisa out again. That they’d stop talking. That they’d stop being honest to each other.

“I never expected to fall for someone again. I had fully prepared myself to be a sad, miserable, lonely widow for the rest of my life. I was prepared to just have Betsy and work to care about” Lisa made eye contact with Carla. She needed Carla to know that she meant what she was about to say. “But then you came into my life and have taken me by surprise. You have pulled down the walls I spent so long building. I never expected to be friends with you let alone fall for you. It was fine when I thought it was just a silly unreciprocated crush. I thought I could contain my feelings. Wait for them to pass. But then we’ve been having these moments. You’ve made me feel so cared for. And then when we kissed last night. I just felt so much. It was overwhelming”

Carla’s lips turned into a small smile. Lisa had practically admitted to liking her. Lisa was being honest with her. “How did the kiss make you feel” Carla probed; she wanted to know what was going on inside Lisa’s head. She wanted to understand her better so they could avoid any more misunderstandings.

“I like you Carla. If that’s what you were asking. There is no doubt about that. But I’m not going to lie to you that kiss made me feel so conflicted. Part of me felt like I was cheating on Becky. I mean you’re the first person I have kissed in three years. Part of me also felt like there was a possibility you would kiss me and find out that your attraction to me was all made up in your head. That you didn’t actually like me. I didn’t want to be a fling to you. I can’t do causal. And so, I ran. Like I always do. I can’t get hurt if I don’t commit”

“Lisa, I really like you too. I need you to know that okay” Carla said walking up from her desk and joining Lisa on the sofa in her office. She took Lisa’s hands in her own. Lisa had been so open and honest with her. It was her turn to be open and honest now. “The fact that you’re a woman has barely crossed my mind. Of course I was a bit hesitant at first. Who wouldn’t be. I’m nearly 50 and I’ve only just figured out I’m attracted to the same gender. But Lisa that doesn’t matter to me. I like you. I’ve been in enough relationships to know what that feels like. I’m not going to jump at the first man who looks my way. I’m not going to get bored of being with a woman. I’m not going to get bored of being with you.”

“You really mean that” It was Lisa’s turn to speak quietly.

“I really mean that” Carla smiled at Lisa. How was it possible that the woman in front of her was so broken. How did the woman in front of her not see how much she meant to her. “You know I’ve been pining after you for months. And I don’t know if you’ve heard the rumours about me, but Carla Connor does not do pinning”

Lisa let out a soft laugh before her face dropped again. “What about Betsy. I need to think about her as well. We’ve not really spoken about the possibility of me moving on”

“I can’t tell you what to do about Betsy. But I can say that you shouldn’t let your fears dictate your life. You deserve to be happy. Especially after everything you have been through. Talk to Betsy. I’m sure she’d understand, eventually”

“Maybe”

“I mean she was determined for us to talk wasn’t she”

“I think she was just annoyed at how mardy we both were”

“I suppose so. I was pretty harsh on everyone today”

“Same here” Lisa paused, realising that her and Carla were still holding hands. She smiled at the contact. “I am sorry for running you know. I must have made you feel like shit. Feels like running is my natural instinct at the moment. I am working on it though. I’ve been thinking of going back to therapy. I didn’t take it too seriously the first time; just getting it done so I could go back to work. I realise now that wasn’t the healthiest thing to do”

“I’m glad you’ve recognised that you have some unhealthy habits. Was worried I’d have to point that out for you as well” Carla nudged Lisa with her elbow to indicate that she was joking.

“Very funny” Lisa nudged her back.

“No, I am glad you are getting help. And that you’re going to try and stop running away from me”

“I’m surprised you’re not keeping count”

“Oh no I am. It’s been like four times now”

“Sorry” Lisa laughed

“I do want to be more than just friends with you Lisa”

“I think I’d like that too”

“I don’t want you to feel like you need to rush anything. Grief is complicated. The first relationship after grief is hard. Believe me I know. We can go at your pace. And please don’t be afraid to tell me anything. I want us to be able to talk to each other”

Lisa pulls Carla into a tight embrace. She doesn’t know what she has done to deserve someone like Carla Connor. She was lucky. She knew that. She wasn’t going to let Carla go easily.

“Thank you for being so understanding. You’re amazing you know” Lisa said slightly pulling out of the hug so that she could make eye contact with Carla.

“So, I’ve been told” Carla said smiling at Lisa. “Just so you know, I really want to kiss you right now”

“So do it” Lisa said while leaning in. She didn’t want to overthink this. Like Carla said earlier, she couldn’t let her fears dictate her life. Their lips locked together. It was the most delicate kiss either of them had ever experienced. They pulled apart. Lisa smiled wildly at Carla. Yeah, maybe she could get used to this.

“Carla, can I take you on a date? Like a proper one”

“Are you sure?” Carla was shocked. She was not expecting Lisa to ask her that. Not after being so open about her fears and how terrified she was to love again.

“Yeah, I’m sure”

“Well in that case, I would love to go on a date with you” Carla said pulling Lisa back into a hug. She made a mental note to buy Betsy a coffee in the morning. She deserved it. There was no chance her or Lisa would have made the step to have the conversation they had just had.

“We should probably check on Betsy. It’s been ages and its dark out now” Lisa said breaking the hug.

“Yeah, your right” Carla did not want to lose contact with Lisa but new that she needed to control herself. Lisa was right after all; Betsy couldn’t stay out there all night. And it was clear Lisa wanted to take this slow; tell Betsy in her own time. She was okay with that of course. She was just happy that Lisa was taking a chance. Letting herself love again, to be loved again.

Lisa and Carla walked back towards the factory doors, their hands brushing gently together. Neither of the pair reach out to connect their hands. The slight contact was enough for them for now. Lisa bit her lip trying to stop a foolishly giddy smile from spreading across her face. Meanwhile Carla banged on the factory doors to notify Betsy of their presence. She had no doubt that the teenager was waiting for them outside.

“Open the door Betsy love” Carla raised her voice so Betsy could hear her, the sharp edge from earlier disappearing.

“You promise you’ve talked”

“Yes kiddo, Carla and I are fine now” Lisa replied, letting her daughter know that she was there too.

Betsy slowly unlocked the door. She wasn’t sure if she trusted them and wanted to be able to close and lock the door again if they needed more time to talk. Betsy eyed both Carla and Lisa, looking them both up and down. They definitely didn’t look like they wanted to kill each other. And the awkward tension between them had disappeared.

“You were talking for a long time” Betsy concluded, fully opening the factory doors so Carla and Lisa could walk out.

“We had a lot to talk about” Carla spoke looking at Lisa.

“And you’re okay again?” Betsy asked still not 100% that everything was okay. She needed the reassurance.

“We’re okay” Lisa confirmed, recognising that Betsy needed to hear those words from both of them.

“Good because I couldn’t deal with you both being so grumpy” Betsy joked lightening the mood. She wasn’t lying either. She would not have been able to deal with her mum’s behaviour for much longer. They would have started arguing again.

“Well, we better head off” Lisa said turning to Carla and offering an awkward wave bye. Carla smiled at Lisa’s awkwardness. It had only been a day, but she had missed Lisa and her nervous demeaner.

“Bye Ms Connor” Betsy said skipping down the steps towards her mum’s car. She pulled out her phone scrolling through her messages until she found Mason’s name.

‘The plan worked. They are talking again. And as things stand, I am not grounded. I probably will be once mum looks at her phone to see I messaged Carla from it. Maybe I should listen to your advice more often’ the message read.

Betsy didn’t wait for a response before pocketing her phone. She was happy that her plan had seemed to work. Her mum was more light-hearted again and Carla was not being a cow bag as she had described earlier. She smiled to herself happy with her work. This was the first step in showing her mum it was okay to be happy again.

Chapter Text

It had been three days since Betsy had locked Carla and Lisa in the factory and everything had seemed to be back to normal. Lisa had resumed her daily morning visits to the factory when she dropped Betsy off, ensuring that she stopped by Carla’s office every time. In fact, the past two days Lisa had lunch with Carla at the factory. Carla had made sure to buy Betsy a coffee every morning to show her appreciation to the teenager despite Lisa informing her that she really didn’t have to do that. It was now the weekend which meant it was time for Lisa and Carla’s date. Lisa was sat on her sofa watching a rubbish Netflix show with Betsy. She hadn’t told Betsy she was going on a date yet. She wasn’t sure how to bring it up. When you become a parent, no one prepares you to have a conversation with your child about dating again after grief. It was probably something she should have talked to her therapist about, but her first session was Tuesday and there was no way Lisa was delaying her date with Carla any further.

“You know you might actually like the show if you actually watched it” Betsy remarked with a smug smile on her face. She had been watching her mother deep in thought for a while.

“I am watching” Lisa said flustered. She couldn’t believe she had been caught daydreaming again. Daydreaming had been a common occurrence ever since her conversation with Carla.

“Oh yeah, who won the fight then?” Betsy asked, amusement dripping from her voice.

“Okay fine you caught me. I wasn’t paying attention” Lisa didn’t even bother trying to put up a fight. She would only end up embarrassing herself even more.

“Care to share what you were thinking about”

Lisa thought about her answer for a while. On the one hand she could tell Betsy no. That this was something she had to figure out on her own before she told her. On the other hand, she could tell Betsy the truth. That she was going on a date later. That she was extremely nervous to be dating again. That she was nervous of her reaction to the thought of her mum dating again. That she was nervous about things not working out with Carla. Lisa took a deep breath, knowing that she had been silent for way too long and that Betsy was waiting for an answer.

“I’m going out tonight” Lisa settled on.

“Okay” Betsy said a little confused. She wasn’t sure how this was related to why her mother wasn’t paying attention to the show or why it would cause her mum to overthink.

“I think it might potentially be a” Lisa paused. Did she really want to tell Betsy this. She decided that she had to. “I think it might potentially be a date” Lisa continued looking across to Betsy to see if there were any obvious outward emotions from her daughter. She knew she should have probably told her daughter that it was definitely a date. But a half lie wasn’t that bad. It was still half the truth after all.

“Oh” was all the Betsy could say in response. She definitely wasn’t expecting her mum to say that.

“Good oh or bad oh” Lisa tried to clarify. Her daughter was not giving anything away.

“I don’t know. Feels strange.” Betsy said honestly turning to look at her mum for the first time. “Do you erm- do you want it to be a date” Betsy asked hesitantly. She wanted to make sure that her mum was sure about this. Whoever she was going out with tonight.

“Yeah, I do” Lisa said honestly. There was no point in lying to Betsy. It would only cause trouble further down the line. “Does that bother you?” Lisa asked. She needed to make sure that Betsy was okay. That this wouldn’t make Betsy spiral downwards again.

Betsy paused to think about her mum’s question. She needed some time to process what she was feeling. “It’s weird. These past three years I never thought I’d hear you say those words ever again. Not sure I wanted to hear you say those words ever again” Betsy began, speaking slowly trying to articulate her thoughts properly. She didn’t want to cause an argument because she misspoke. “If you had asked me that question a couple months ago, I probably would have told you that you were selfish, that you were forgetting mum, that you were betraying her” Betsy saw a flash of hurt appear on her mum’s face as soon as she mentioned her other mum.

“I could never ever forget your mum, Betsy. She meant everything to me. She still means everything to me” Lisa interrupts. She needed Betsy to know that she will always love her mum.

“I know that. So, to answer your question now, you dating again doesn’t bother me. Obviously its weird knowing your parent is going out on dates. But I know your never going to forget mum. That you’re never going to replace her. You deserve to be happy mum you really do. And if this mystery person you are going on a date with makes you happy, then I suppose I can be okay with it” Betsy finished off her monologue and pulled her mum into a tight hug.

“You really mean that” Lisa whispered into Betsy’s ear from the hug, not wanting to let go just yet.

“Wouldn’t have said it if I didn’t mean it would I” Betsy remarked pulling away from her mother’s grasp.

“Ah there’s my snarky teen” Lisa joked, gently pushing Betsy’s shoulder.

“So”

“So what?” Lisa asked confused.

“Do I get to know who this mystery person you’re going on a date with” Betsy asked. She secretly hoped it would be Carla. Ever since she forced them to talk in the factory, she had noticed her mum and her boss getting closer. Carla was good for them. Even Betsy could recognise that.

“No, you do not. I think that’s enough honesty from me for one day” Lisa kept her tone light to show Betsy that she wasn’t trying to be mean.

“Oh, mum please tell me” Betsy whined.

“Not yet darling. It’s only our first date. I don’t want you developing any ideas or expectations. But if everything goes well and I want to continue seeing this person then I promise I will tell you straight away”

“Promise?”

“Promise”

“Suppose I can live with that”

“Come here you” Lisa said pulling Betsy into another hug. “I love you so much”

“I love you too. Now let go. We need to go upstairs”

“What why? I thought you wanted me to pay attention to the show?”

“Forget the show mum. We need to find you an outfit for your date!” Betsy exclaimed.

Lisa smiled lovingly at her daughter. The conversation going so much better than she ever expected. “Go on then crazy. Lead the way” Lisa followed Betsy up the stairs content that her daughter was happy for her.

Carla was nervous. She had no idea what to expect with her date with Lisa. She knew they were going to dinner but that was it. Was it somewhere fancy? Somewhere causal? She was overthinking to the max. She had pulled out half her wardrobe already, declaring that none of her clothes were fit enough to be worn in the presence of Lisa Swain. Carla groaned and threw herself back onto her bed. ‘Honestly you are completely losing it Carla. What is wrong with you’ she thought to herself. She reached over to her bedside table to grab her phone seeing if she had any messages waiting a reply. She put her phone on silent earlier so she could try and get a bit of work done without getting distracted. Not that it helped. Picking up her phone Carla realised that she had a few unread messages from Lisa.

‘Realised I didn’t tell you what to wear. I’m not going to force you to dress up if you don’t want to but it’s a fairly nice restaurant so maybe nothing too casual x’

‘I mean dress up if you want to. I won’t complain x’

‘I mean you can do what you want of course x’

‘I’m making a mess of this aren’t I… x’

‘Betsy and I are going through my clothes now. Apparently, I own nothing that is in style anymore. Hoping I can still impress you… Whittled down my options to a jumpsuit or a nice shirt and trouser combo. Can’t wait to see you x’

Carla blushed at the influx of messages. It was nice to know that Lisa was nervous to; made clear by the nervous rambling she manged to commit via text. It was endearing really. Carla couldn’t remember the last time she had felt this giddy messaging someone she was romantically interested in. Or even the last time she was this nervous to go on a date. There was something about Lisa Swain that made her feel like a giddy teenager experiencing her first love all over again. And if Carla was being honest with herself, she couldn’t get enough of it. They hadn’t even been on their first date yet, but Carla could already feel herself falling head over heels for the detective. Carla sent a message back to Lisa recognising that if she didn’t text back soon then the DS might have thought that she was ghosting her. Carla couldn’t help but tease Lisa a little stating that it was very clear what a nervous wreck Lisa was but quickly informed the detective that she was feeling just as nervous.

After her talk with Lisa, Carla was feeling much more confident and had chosen her outfit. She was beginning to get ready when she heard her front door open and Ryan’s voice calling out to her.

“Carla, was wondering if you fancied a takeaway or something for tea tonight”

Carla popped her head around her bedroom door to speak to her nephew. “Oh, Ry I completely forget to tell you that I’m going out this evening”

“Oh yeah where you off to” Ryan asked suddenly very intrigued in what Carla had to say.

“Well if you must know I have a date so”

“You have a date” Ryan repeated back to Carla. Just to make sure he was hearing things correctly.

“Yes, Ryan I have a date”

“Oh well I’m happy for you n’all” Ryan hesitated, wondering if he should continue his sentence.

“Yeah, you sound it” Carla glared at him, clear that she was not impressed with his tone of voice.

Ryan sighed and prepared for a ton of objects to be thrown his way once he had finished his sentence. It was clear that Carla was not going to move without hearing what he had to say. “It’s just I was really hoping that you and Lisa would figure your stuff out. You were good together. And you both really liked each other. Its just is it not a bit too soon to be trying to move away from those feelings” Ryan asked. He really did believe that his aunt and the local DS could have something special if they both put the effort in. But Carla was stubborn he knew that. And once she made up her mind then there was little to no chance in changing it.

Carla smiled at Ryan trying her hardest not to laugh. She didn’t want to give anything away already. She wanted to mess with Ryan a bit. Make up for all the times he had teased her. “Yeah well, this person just had a charm to them. Found it really hard to say no” Carla said with a hint on amusement. She was really struggling to keep a straight face.

“Okay. I can see you clearly happy about this date. Whose it with them. Do I know them”

“Yeah, you know them”

“Do I get to know who it is then”

Carla couldn’t stop the smile that spread across her face. It seemed that whenever she thought about Lisa these days an involuntary smile would appear. “It’s Lisa”

“What” Ryan asked, eyes wide open. He needed to make sure he had heard that right. Did Carla just say she was going on a date with Lisa.

“I’m going on a date with Lisa” Carla repeated.

“Oh my God. When did this happen. Why didn’t you tell me. Are you official”

“Ryan slow down breath. What’s with the million questions”

“Well, the last thing you had told me was that Lisa has too much baggage and now you’re telling me your going on a date with her” Ryan exclaimed.

“Changed my mind didn’t I” Carla shrugged. “And as much as I would love to answer all of your questions, I have to finish getting ready or I’m going to be late” Carla turned back into her bedroom and shut the door. Quietly laughing to herself over her nephew’s behaviour.

“You have to answer all my questions once you get back” Carla heard Ryan shout through the flat. She shook her head and gave another little chuckle. ‘What is my life’ she thought to herself while pulling out her makeup bag; nerves hitting her again. She so desperately wanted this date to go well. She needed this date to go well.

Carla pulled up at the address Lisa had messaged her. They had both decided to go out of Weathersfield for their date, opting for more privacy on their first date. Carla got out of her car and looked up at the building in front of her. Lisa stating that the restaurant was only ‘quite nice’ was a complete understatement. Carla was so glad that she decided to dress up. Looking at the surrounding areas Carla could see that they were in quite a posh bit of town. Smiling as she made eye contact with Lisa and made her way over.

“Wow Carla you look beautiful” Lisa said looking the women in front of her up and down. Carla was wearing a fitted black dress that showed just the right amount of leg and if Lisa was being honest with herself just the right amount of cleavage. Not too much but certainly enough to allow her mind to wonder.

“Hey eyes are up here detective” Carla joked, nudging Lisa slightly.

“Sorry. Your just gorgeous. Hard to keep my eyes off you” Lisa blushed. She couldn’t believe that she had been caught staring already.

Carla laughed and grabbed Lisa’s hand, turning and walking towards the entrance of the restaurant.

“Yeah, well you don’t look half bad yourself”

“Hey!” Lisa pouted showing mock annoyance.

Carla giggled and pecked Lisa’s lips. Lisa automatically smiling into the kiss. “You look stunning Lisa. Always do” Carla said resting her forehead on top of Lisa’s. Lisa was wearing a navy-blue halter neck jumpsuit that showed off her toned arms. Carla didn’t know that it was possible to be attracted to someone’s arms but here she is admiring Lisa and her beauty. Lisa bit her lip struggling to contain her wild smile. She could get used to date nights with Carla.

“Come on. We should get inside before we are late for our reservation” Lisa said briefly breaking the contact between her and Carla before reaching back out for her hand and dragging her inside the restaurant.

“Oooo even got a reservation. Date is scoring good points so far Swain” Carla smirked swaying into Lisa as she walked.

“Shut up Connor” Lisa lovingly rolled her eyes as she came to a stop waiting for a waitress to speak to.

The date was in full swing, and Carla and Lisa were having a great time. They had ordered their food – opting for a sharing platter knowing that they would both try and steal what the other had ordered anyway. They were laughing and joking like there was no one else in the room. In fact they had barely recognised that the waiter had come back over to deliver their food – to engrossed in their own conversation.

Lisa took the first bite of the food, eyes lighting up at how good it had tasted.

“You know the reviews on this place were good, but I didn’t think the food would taste that good!” Lisa exclaimed.

Carla raised an eyebrow amused at her date’s reaction to the food, taking a bite of the platter herself. “Okay your right. That’s amazing”

“Beats my ready cooked meals that for sure”

“Mmmm Betsy tells me that you’re not the best chef all the time”

“She what” Lisa gasped, clutching her hand to her chest over dramatically. “I’ll have you know I am a brilliant cook. I just don’t really have the time to cook anymore” Lisa trailed off, suddenly feeling ashamed that she doesn’t cook her daughter home cooked meals that often anymore.

“Hey, I’m not judging” Carla reached out and grabbed Lisa’s hand from across the table. “I’m an awful cook. Takeaways it is for me most nights. I mean I think I would burn a ready cooked meal. Honestly utterly hopeless I am” Carla said lightening the mood once more.

“You can’t be that bad surely. All you have to do is stick it the microwave”

“Yes, but I forgot to take the plastic off. Nearly set the whole flat on fire” Carla replied smiling up at Lisa, enjoying that they could have an enjoyable conversation about something completely random like ready cooked meals.

“Right that it. You are completely banned from my kitchen”

“Ah that’s a shame. Guess we will just have to make more use of the other rooms in the house” Carla smirked at Lisa. Lisa’s breath hitched in her throat. There was no hiding what Carla was insinuating at.

“Careful or I’ll ban you from my bedroom n’all” Lisa replied quietly, aware that they were in public and needed to keep their voices down but ensuring to maintain eye contact with Carla. There was no way she was letting Carla have the upper hand on this. She would never live it down.

“Well, we couldn’t have that could we. I’ll be on my best behaviour officer promise” Carla flashed an innocent smile.

Lisa took a deep breath trying her best to compose herself. She would be lying if she said that hearing Carla seductively call her officer was not a turn on.

“Oh, you like that do you” Carla questioned an amused glint in her eye.

“Maybe” Lisa blushed feeling incredibly embarrassed. This was only their first date after all.

“Good to know” Carla nodded mentally storing that information for a later date. “If it makes you feel any better, I like it too” Carla offered noticing that Lisa was fidgeting rather awkwardly.

“Really?” Lisa questioned.

“Yeah” Carla nodded, smiling at Lisa. She knew this was only their first date, but their connection was already so fierce. It felt like she could talk to Lisa about anything. She hoped that Lisa was feeling the same way about her.

“You know I don’t think this has ever been a first date topic. Not that I’ve been on many first dates” Lisa said breaking the silence.

Carla laughed. “Can’t say the same for me”

“What do you mean”

“Oh, I’ve been on far too many first dates. Surely, you’ve heard the Weathersfield gossip” Carla asked raising one eyebrow. She knew the street were avid gossipers. Lisa must have heard at least one bad thing about Carla.

“I tend not to listen to gossipers. Especially when its about people I care about. Besides people tend to stop talking around me. You know with me being a detective and that”

“Well then I guess I’ve got a lot to tell you about” Carla paused to regrip Lisa’s hand as they were both done eating for now. “But not today. And not all at once. There is a lot to go through”

“There’s no pressure to tell me anything. You’ll tell me when your ready and that’s enough for me” Lisa said tightening the grip on Carla’s hand giving it a gentle squeeze of support.

“Your amazing do you know that”

“You’re just saying that because you like me”

“I’m saying that because its true Lisa. You’re an amazing detective, an amazing mum but most of all you’re an amazing person. And that’s why I like you” It was Carla’s turn to give the detective’s hand a reassuring squeeze.

“Yeah, well I think your pretty amazing as well”

“Yeah?”

“Yeah. You’ve been such a big support to Betsy. She really likes you; you know. Even if she won’t tell you herself. You’ve been so patient and understanding with me. Most people would have run a mile by now. But you’ve stuck by our side showing what an incredible person you are. And on top of all of that you run a very successful business. Your amazing Carla. And if it wasn’t obvious before, I really really like you” Lisa finished smiling shyly at the women across from her.

Carla had tears in her eyes. She was not expecting such a big declaration from Lisa. She was used to Lisa keeping her cards close to herself. Carla leant across the table and leaned in. Lisa got the cue and also leaned across the table meeting Carla halfway. They paused smiling up at each other before continuing to lean in. Their lips met in such an emotional kiss. The kiss was slow, tentative but so filled of passion. Neither wanted to part but both recognised they were in a fancy restaurant and PDA was probably not appreciated.

Their moment was broken by the waiter coming over to clear their table and asking if they wanted any desert. They opted to share a cheesecake as they were both nearly full. But what meal was truly complete without a desert.

“Y’know” Carla said twirling her fork in her hand suddenly very nervous. She had barely even touched the cheesecake since it had arrived. “I was going to ask you this earlier, but I didn’t want to mention anything that could ruin our date”

Lisa looked at Carla reassuringly “You can ask me anything, anytime. No matter what”

“Right okay. I’m just going to say it then. What have you told Betsy? Its just I don’t want to accidentally say anything before you’ve had a chance to speak to her”

“Thank you for thinking about that” Lisa started off with; wanting to make sure that Carla understood how much she appreciates her. Lisa took some of the cheesecake on her fork and offered it up to Carla, noticing that Carla hadn’t had much. Carla gladly ate the food offered to her off of Lisa’s fork. “I told her I was going on a date”

“And how did that go”

“Much better than expected. She told me she just wanted me to be happy”

“That’s a good thing isn’t it” Carla said now feeding Lisa the cheesecake off of her fork. Yeah, they were really becoming a cliché couple Carla thought.

“I erm- I didn’t tell her the date was with you though”

“Oh” Carla said. She wasn’t sure how she was supposed to feel about that.

“I didn’t lie and make up some random person” Lisa quickly clarified noticing Carla’s reaction. “I just told her I wanted to see how the date went first. I mean I know how I feel about you. And I really hoped today went well. I just couldn't help but feel nervous. I know we had that conversation in the factory, but I was scared you might have changed your mind, realised I’m not worth the effort. Or worse, you realised after the date that you’re not as attracted to me as you thought. I just didn’t want to tell Betsy and then things didn’t work out after one date” Lisa couldn’t help it. The words just came tumbling out of her mouth before she could stop them. She was about to apologise before Carla cut her off.

“I am definitely still attracted to you. Maybe even more so now then before. I was nervous for today too you know. I really want things to work between us” Carla smiled at Lisa. She wanted Lisa to always be honest with her. She didn’t want Lisa to think she couldn’t say how she was feeling in fear of hurting her feelings.

“I know these are thoughts I should work through with my therapist. I just – if I’m being honest, I really wanted to go on this date with you. I don’t start seeing my therapist until Tuesday and I really didn’t want to postpone our date”

“I’m glad you didn’t. I’ve had a really good time tonight”

“Me too”

“And I’m glad you trust me enough to be honest with me about how your feeling”

“It scares me how much I trust you. We haven’t known each other that long but I trust you with my life”

“The feeling is 100% reciprocated”

Lisa looked down at her hands feeling very nervous. Was this too soon to ask. Should she wait until the next date. Should she wait until she’s at least had one therapy session. She felt a hand underneath her chin forcing her to look upwards. When she meets Carla’s eyes, she knows the answers to all of her questions. She knows what she wants. She just hopes Carla wants it to.

The waiter comes over and Lisa requests the bill. Lisa and Carla sweetly bickered over who was paying the bill. The waiter even offered that they could spilt the bill unaware of the two stubborn people he was standing in front of.

“I asked you out so I should pay”

“But I feel as though its my turn. You cooked dinner for us last time”

“You can do it next time. I asked you out on the date so I would like to pay. Please let me” Lisa asked looking at Carla with her best puppy dog eyes impression.

Carla broke immediately. The look on Lisa’s face was far too cute. “Fine but I’m paying next time” Carla huffed crossing her arms over her chest.

Lisa’s face broke into a smile, giving Carla a quick peck on the lips before reaching for her card. The waiter was still standing there with an amused look on their face at the site of the couple in front of them. It was refreshing to see such a happy, carefree couple, instead of the stuck-up rich people they normally had to serve. Lisa gave the waiter a generous tip which she decided Carla didn’t need to know about and then grabbed her jacket. She locked arms with Carla as they made their way out of the restaurant and towards Carla’s car. It made sense why Carla wasn’t drinking now.

“I know. I know. I was so flustered that I didn’t realise that I would probably have wanted a drink with my dinner”

“One wouldn’t have hurt”

“Ah yes but then I’d want more then one and that detective sergeant would have been illegal”

“Mmmm yeah wouldn't have wanted to end our date in handcuffs would we”

“Well maybe not this time” Carla quipped smirking.

“Get your mind out of the gutter Connor”

“Can’t help it” Carla shrugged laughing as Lisa pulled her in for a kiss.

“Hands to yourself officer”

“Can’t help it. Your addictive” Lisa replied. “Anyway” Lisa said pulling back slightly so she could look at Carla while she said this. “I’ve been thinking”

“Oh god help us all”

“Hey!” Lisa laughed, hitting Carla’s arm playfully. “As I was saying. I’ve been thinking quite a bit this evening. And I was wondering if maybe I could possibly be your girlfriend. I know we probably have a while to go before we’ve sorted everything about, but I really like you and I enjoyed this evening so much so yeah. Would you like to be my girlfriend” Lisa clarified, recognising that she waffled a lot during that.

“I would love to be your girlfriend” Carla smiled at her now girlfriend

“Yeah?” Lisa said softly

“Yeah” Carla replied, leaning in to kiss Lisa. Lisa smiled refusing to shut her eyes until the last possible second. She wanted to saviour this moment as much as possible. She loved kissing Carla. She couldn’t get enough of Carla. She just really loved being around her girlfriend.

“I’m happy you said yes”

“What did you think I would say no!?” Carla asked completely dumbfounded. How could Lisa possibly think she’d ever said no.

“I was worried it was too soon”

“You’re the one who was so worried about us she ran away the first time” Carla teased.

“Haha very funny”

“I’m happy that I’m your girlfriend too”

“That’s not what I said” Lisa blushed trying to look stern and failing miserably.

“It’s what you meant though”

Lisa rolled her eyes. Carla could read her so easily it was terrifying. “Okay fine maybe that’s what I meant” Lisa replied stealing another quick kiss from her girlfriend. “I want to tell Betsy about us. If that’s okay with you”

“Of course that’s okay with me love” Carla replied, the pet-name falling from her lips so naturally.

“I was hoping of telling her as soon as possible, with you by my side”

Carla searched her girlfriend’s eyes trying to see if there was any hint of hesitation from Lisa. “Are you sure? I don’t want to intrude. If you think it will be easier without me there, I can stay away”

“No. I want you there. After today I don’t think she will react badly. I wouldn’t put you through that if I thought she would”

“Okay I’ll be there. Just let me know when”

“Was thinking maybe tomorrow. I want to make sure she finds out from me and no doubt she will be asking how the date went”

“Okay then I’ll see you tomorrow” Carla smiled not really wanting to leave her girlfriend just yet. “How are you getting home? I don’t see your car” Carla stated.

“Oh, I don’t live too far I was just going to get the bus or a taxi or something”

“Oh no you don’t let me drop you home”

“Honestly Carla it’s fine. You don’t need to go out of your way for me”

“Don’t be ridiculous get in the car. If I want to drop MY girlfriend home, I will” Carla made sure to emphasise the ‘my’, really liking the fact that she finally gets to call Lisa her girlfriend.

“Well, YOUR girlfriend really appreciates it” Lisa smiled emphasising the ‘your’ to lovingly mock Carla while climbing into the passenger seat. Carla lets a little airy chuckle before breaking into a smile and shaking her head, heading over to the other side of the car and into the driver’s seat. She could get used to this.