Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

Mom is the one driving today,  thankfully. Steven drives way too slow but Laurel drives like a mad woman. Weaving in and out of cars like it’s a race track, her speed well above the legal limit. She shaves an hour off our drive although I don’t know if that is because of her driving or the fact there is no traffic. We left early, before the sun was even in the sky early. “Beck will try and do everything if I am not there,” she explained to us. I heard Steven in the front seat mumble, “At least then the food will be edible.” My mum just shot him a look and he shut up. 

It’s a mostly silent car ride, Steven sleeps in the front seat, my mom listens to the radio moving from the news to music every so often and me, I text Conrad. 

He wakes up two hours into our drive, around seven in the morning. He sends me a good morning text and I feel butterflies in my stomach. He came over again two weeks ago but we barely got any time alone, Steven made sure to stick by us the entire time. He came and got ice cream with us but Conrad put his foot down when we went to the movies. “Steven you’re my best friend but I want to take her on a date. Just the two of us. Stay here.” He grabbed my hand and led me out the door, I looked back at Steven and stuck my tongue out at him before turning back around to Conrad who had a knowing look on his face. You could hear Steven sputtering from the front walk and my mom telling him to leave us alone.

He took us to the movies, I don’t even remember what we watched I was just happy to be there with him. He held my hand the entire time, and during one particularly boring scene he leaned over and kissed me, soft and slow. It wasn’t for long, Conrad wasn’t the type for prolonged PDA, just long enough for my heart to race and my lips to get slightly swollen. As he slowly pulled away he nuzzled his nose to mine and gave me a breathtaking smile. I couldn’t focus the rest of the movie not that I was before the kiss. 

As he drove me home I kept thinking about how I never wanted this night to end. He kissed me at the front door before we both went in, Laurel tried to get him to stay the night but he told her he had to get back to school. I walked him out and he kissed me against his car, it was a sweet kiss that was broken by Steven making gagging noises at the front door. 

I looked over Conrad’s shoulder and flipped him off, I yelled at him to go inside. He glared at me and shut the door. I looked back at Conrad wanting to kiss him but the moment was ruined. He said goodbye, gave me a peck on the lips and got into his car. He didn’t leave until I was back in the house. Steven made fun of my lovesick expression as I leaned against the door. I flipped him off and ran up the stairs to go call Taylor to tell her everything.

He texts me the entire way to his house, only stopping when he has to shower, my mom sends knowing looks to me as she drives. 

We arrive around nine and my mom just walks in like she lives there, yelling for Susannah who comes around the corner in her pajamas, “What are you doing here? It’s nine thirty in the morning.”

“And you’re already cooking,” my mum says accusatorially. 

“It’s Thanksgiving of course I am.” She pulls Steven into a hug and then me whispering, “Hi sweet girl,” in my ear.

As she lets go of me I see Conrad come down the stairs a smile on his face, he gives my mom and Steven a hug first. They go further into the house but we stay there, he comes up to me and looks around for a second seeing if anyone is watching, when he sees that we are alone, he kisses me full on the lips, his hands cupping my cheeks bringing me closer as I bunch up the sweater he is wearing in my hands bringing him closer to me. 

We break apart to catch our breaths, smiling wide at each other. He takes my hand and goes to lead me up the stairs but Adam is coming down the stairs. “Where are you two going?” He asks with a raised eyebrow. He turns to Conrad not waiting for an answer, “No girls allowed in your room.”

“What? Since when?” Conrad asks.

“Since now," he tells him before turning to me, "Nice to see you Belly.”

”Nice to see you too Adam.” Although I don’t really mean it not after what Conrad told me about him cheating on Susannah.

“First of all, I’m eighteen and in college I can have girls in my room. Second of all, I was taking her to the rec room to watch the parade.”

Adam just looks at his son his face full of skepticism, he doesn’t believe Conrad but I do. He wouldn’t be so presumptuous to bring me to his room after a month of dating even though I wouldn’t mind. “Well you can watch the parade in the living room with the rest of us. Let’s go.” He stays on the stairs motioning us to the back of the house, Conrad rolls his eyes not moving. I am the one to tug on his hand, “Come on.” I tell him walking to the living room. 

I can hear our moms in the kitchen puttering around and gossiping I think I even hear mine and Conrad’s names but I continue walking, Jere and Steven are on the couch talking about their senior year when we come in. His smile slips off his face for a second when he sees me and Conrad but then quickly comes back this time fake and strained. “Hey Belly.”

“Hey Jere, happy Thanksgiving.” He just nods and goes back to talking to Steven. 

Conrad and I sit on the love seat but we keep some distance our hands on the cushion between us. He reaches over and grabs the clicker turning on the tv to the parade. We talk through most of it, pointing to our favorite parts and commenting on the musical acts. My mum and Susannah come in towards the end and they pepper all four of us with questions about school and friends. 

Around one I go into the kitchen with the moms and help with making some of the desserts. Susannah bumps her hip with mine as we make the brownie batter, “You two seemed pretty cozy on the couch,” she says with a smirk.

“Susannaahhh,” I say blushing bright red.

She just laughs, “What? I am so happy you two are together. It’s adorable.” I don’t say anything I just smile like an idiot as I pour the brownie batter into the pan. “You two are using protection right?” She asks. 

The bowl falls out of my hands and clatters to the counter, thankfully most of the batter is in the pan only a little bit splatters. 

Conrad rushes into the kitchen at the noise, “Is everything okay?”

“YES!” I shout at him. He’s taken aback by my loud declaration. I clear my throat and say again, “Yes just slipped. You can go back into the parlor.” He spares me and his mum one last look before taking his leave. 

Once he’s out of earshot I turn to Susannah red as a tomato, “Why would you ask that?”

“I want to make sure I am not becoming a grandmother anytime soon.”

“Oh my god Susannah! Nothing is happening.” She gives me an incredulous look, “I promise! We haven’t done anything but kiss.”

“Okay," she says but it's not a very convincing 'okay'. She’s silent as she puts the brownies into the oven and I start to clean up the batter that has spilled. She comes back to stand next to me, “Well you two seem to be on the on ramp for that. We should really talk about birth control.” My mom comes in at that exact moment, “Beck!”

“What? Do you want grandkids before we’re fifty.”

“Of course not!” She exclaims. “Bean, is there something you need to tell me?” My moms voice is laced with worry. 

“No, we haven’t-“ I lower my voice just in case any nosey brothers are eavesdropping, “Had sex. He hasn’t touched me anywhere but my waist. Please stop.”

“We’ll make an appointment to see Dr. Covey when we get home,” Laurel says resolutely. 

“Oh my god both of you stop! I promise if the time comes I will go on birth control but until then just zip it.” I leave the kitchen quickly heading to the parlor where the boys are. I sit next to Conrad in my original spot but this time I don’t take his hand and sit as far as possible from him on the couch. He looks at me confused but I just shake my head and turn my attention to the tv where Charlie Brown thanksgiving is on. 

Around three the moms go out back into the garden, they think we don’t know what they’re doing but we’re not dumb. Shortly after Steven and Jere leave to go on “a walk”. They invite Conrad but he declines and they leave. The second they are out the door Conrad drags me upstairs, carefully avoiding his dad’s office where Adam is working even on a holiday. He goes to go to the rec room but I drag him to his room shutting and locking the door tightly behind us.

He goes to ask me what I am doing but is silenced by my lips on his. I kiss him until I’m breathless. He walks me back until my legs hit the edge of the bed and I sit on the edge. Our kiss now broken he smiles at me before leaning down and kissing me again.

He’s startled when I grip him by the sweater and pull him on top of me as I lay down. “Belly,” he says pulling back a question in his eyes.

“Shhh,” I quiet him before pulling him back down. His warm hands go under my shirt caressing my heated skin and I shiver inadvertently. He pulls back slightly, his eyebrows scrunches together, “I-is this okay?”

I nod, “Yeah, don’t stop,” he smiles and leans back down pulling me into a passionate kiss. His weight is comforting on top of me, he’s doing his best to keep his weight off of me but then he shifts and I can feel his hardness against my hip, I get freaked out and push him off me, “Wait, stop!”

“Are you okay? Did I do something wrong?” He asks worriedly.

“No, no, it’s just…” he nods for me to continue as he worries his bottom lip between his teeth, “Our moms think we’re having sex.”

“What?”

“The reason I dropped the bowl was because she asked me if we were using protection.”

“But-but we’re not even having sex!” He splutters. 

“I know I told her that, she didn’t believe me then my mom came in and said she would make an appointment with her doctor when we got home.” I don’t tell him what kind of doctor, he’s pre-med he’ll figure it out.

“Well while you were in the kitchen my dad pulled me aside and read me the riot act."

“Oh my god. Did something happen to make everyone think we’re having sex?”

“Not that I know of. I came home after our date before going back to school, told her about our date and then left the next morning. I didn’t tell her anything that you wouldn’t have.” He can see how stressed I am. “Belly just because people think we are doesn’t meant mean we have to do anything. We can take our time. I don’t expect anything from you.”

“No, no. Don’t get me wrong. I do want to. Eventually but we’ve only been dating a month- barely. I’m not ready. Not yet.”

“That’s fine. We can wait as long as you want, I don’t care about that. Okay?”

I bite my lip softly, nodding, “Okay.” He goes to get off the bed but I stop him with a hand on his chest, “Just because I am not ready to have sex doesn’t mean I want to stop what we were doing,” I say smirking at him before pulling him back on top of me kissing him again. He keeps his hand on my waist over my shirt this time while my hands go to his hair pulling him closer to me. 

He kisses me until I’m breathless and my lips are swollen, he pulls back after awhile. “We should get downstairs our brothers will be back soon and we don’t need to give our moms any more ideas.” 

He gets off of me and then pulls me up, he kisses me one last time before taking my hand and unlocking his door opening it. We thought we would be able to get off Scott free but Adam is coming out of his office across the hall and sees us coming out of Conrad’s room. He looks down at our hands where they are connected then his eyes roam our figures, he takes in our swollen lips and rumpled clothing  and Conrad’s mussed hair. His eyes go hard, “Belly go downstairs to your mom and Susannah. Conrad my office now.” He turns and walks back where he came from keeping the door open for his son to follow. 

Conrad looks at me and smiles measuredly, “Go down and help the moms. I’ll be down soon.”

Conrad’s POV

I watch Belly walk down the stairs, she turns back every few steps to look at me until she reaches the bottom. I take a deep breath before heading into my dad’s office knowing I am going to be read the riot act again.

I shut the door behind me and my dad in a commanding voice says, “Sit down.” I do as he says sitting in the chair across from his desk. I haven’t been in here in awhile not having a need. It’s filled with my football trophies, he always liked looking at them more than I did. 

“What’s up dad?”

“Really? I just saw you two coming out of your room with your clothes all rumpled and hair messed up and you’re going to ask what’s up?”

I don’t respond, I just cross my arms in front of me defensively. I feel like I’m fourteen again and he got a call from Caitlin Murphy’s mom that she found us making out on the couch. When I got home he gave the sex talk even though it was about two months too late. I never told him that though. 

“I don’t care that you are in college you still have to follow the rules of this house,” he says angrily.

“What rules? The only rule you had was not to get anyone pregnant or catch an STD, I’ve followed that rule pretty well, I don't have the clap and you don't have any grandkids running around," I pause for a moment before adding, "That you know about anyway. I can't vouch for Jeremiah but none of the girls I've been with have gotten pregnant not even a scare."

“Don’t be a wise ass, I told you earlier no girls allowed in your room.”

“A rule that you made up today, you never had a problem with Caitlin, Tina or Aubrey being in my room when we were dating.”

“None of those girls were my goddaughter.” I never understood why Laurel would pick him as the godfather over any other man in her life it didn’t make sense. My dad sighs heavily and leans back in his chair, “I think it’s time we have a refresher on safe sex.”

My eyes almost pop out of my head, “What? Absolutely not. No way,” I go to get up but he stops me with a glare. He sternly says, “Sit down Conrad. Look I know you are eighteen and have been having sex for awhile but I will not have you getting Belly pregnant. She is too young. You are to always use a condom,” he reaches into his desk, pulling something out and throws it at me, “Here.” I look down and in my hand is a box of condoms.  

“DAD!” I shout in agitation. “I can get my own condoms I have for the past four years. Besides we’re not having sex.” I put the box on his desk sliding them to him. 

He just slides them back, “Don’t be a fucking idiot like my friends and I were. Take the condoms, wrap it up every time even if she’s on birth control. I won’t have you getting her pregnant, I will never hear the end of it from Laurel.”

I think I’m gonna die, “Okay whatever. Can I leave now?”

“Promise me you will be safe.”

“Okay I Fucking promise,” I practically scream at him before running out the door. I put the condoms in my nightstand before taking a deep breath and heading downstairs to the living room where Belly is on the couch watching the first Friends thanksgiving episode. She notices my flushed cheeks, her eyebrows scrunch together in worry. I sit down next to her and wrap my arm around her, she leans up and kisses me softly, "Don't let him get to you. Enjoy today, okay?" she says putting her hand on my cheek. 

She thinks we had a fight, I realize. I cough awkwardly about to tell her what happened when I hear the front door open signaling the guys are back. "I'm okay, promise." I lean down kissing her again, soft and slow unlike earlier in my bedroom when it was hurried.

Belly’s POV

Dinner was amazing, Susannah made the turkey and a load of sides. I sat next to Conrad and he held my hand on the table, Jere sat across from us and glared at our hands when he saw but I didn’t back down. I held my boyfriends hand proudly. Jeremiah is a grown man he can tell me if he’s upset. 

After dinner the moms went upstairs cleaning out the closet in the guest room where I’ll be sleeping. They call me up when they find her old baby tees from college. Conrad makes some quip about not wanting  to see me in his moms baby tees but I know it’ll go out of his mind once he sees me in one of them. 

When my mom and Susannah are finally done playing dress up with me I head downstairs to find Conrad and Steven playing bowling on the Wii. I sit down on the couch and watch them, it feels like we’re kids again, the boys talking trash while they play. Conrad is the most competitive person I know, after me of course, he plays to win and Steven likes to talk smack whenever he can.  The only thing missing is Jeremiah’s laughter as he rags on both of them for their playing.  I saw him heading to his room when I was with the moms, he glared at me but I just ignored him. 

Conrad comes and sits with me while it’s Steven’s turn, he puts his arm around my shoulder and pulls me into his side, he leans in and kisses me quickly making me blush. “Ugh! Don’t mack on my sister right in front of me!” Steven exclaims throwing his hands in the air. 

Conrad laughs a deep rumbling laugh I can feel as I lay against his side. “I’m not macking on her, I kissed her. Get used to it Steve-o.” My heart warms at him defending us to my brother. I grin and stick out my tongue at my brother, he flips me off and turns back to the tv to take his turn.  

They continue playing the game, whenever it’s Steven’s turn Conrad sits with me just like before and kisses me when Steven turns around.

Once they’re done with bowling they switch to GTA, I sit there while they play and I text Taylor who asks me if I brought cute pajamas instead of my usual ratty shirt and sweatpants. I did. 

When they bored of GTA I suggest putting on a movie. Conrad puts on How the Grinch Stole Christmas and it only takes twenty minutes before Steven starts to yawn. Finally! “Alright I’m heading to bed,” he gets up and looks at me expectantly. 

“What?” I ask him. 

“Come on, let’s go.”

“I’m not tired. I want to finish the movie,” I say pointing to where Jim Carrey is moving through Whoville. 

He laughs sarcastically, “Yeah, no. I’m not leaving you down here in a darkened room with your boyfriend. Let’s go Belly.”

My face heats with anger and I’m about to yell at him telling him he has no right to tell me what to do when Conrad says, “Go upstairs Steven. We’re watching the movie and then we’re going to bed in our separate rooms.”

Steven looks between us, he wants to argue but I think his tiredness overtakes him and he yawns. “Fine.” 

“Goodnight,” we say to his back. Once I hear his feet on the second floor moving around Conrad pulls me into a kiss, his lips move against mine in a dance that’s been well practiced the past month. He pulls back slightly, “I’ve been wanting to do that since dinner.”

I giggle softly and pull him back into a kiss. The movie continues playing behind us, lighting up the room in a soft glow. His tongue sweeps along my lower lip and I open my mouth slightly inviting him in. Our tongues tangle together, the kiss becoming heated. Conrad moves slightly and my back is pressed against the arm of the couch, our bodies now at an angle. I don't know how long it's been since we started, all my senses are surrounded by Conrad. 

A clearing of a throat springs us apart, both of us going to opposite ends of the couch. I look up and see Adam standing there his arms crossed and an upset expression on his face. “Whatcha ya doing?”

“Nothing,” I say, my cheeks feel like they're burning at getting caught like that. "Just watching a movie," I point to the screen where Maywho is proposing to Martha. 

"Mind if I watch with you guys?" He asks and points to the recliner off to the side. 

"Yes."

"No." Conrad and I say at the same time. Adam ignores his son and sits down in the recliner. The air is thick with tension as we watch the remainder of the movie. Conrad and I remain on opposite sides of the couch not daring to move closer.

When the credits begin to roll I excuse myself saying I'm tired and practically run out of the room to go upstairs. I'm changing into my pajamas when I hear footsteps on the stairs, I can tell it's Conrad, growing up with him just down the hall every summer I learned the way his foot fell. A few minutes later I hear Adam walk up the stairs and head towards his and Susannah's room on the other end of the house. 

I get into bed and try to fall asleep. I toss and turn for over two hours but it's useless. I can’t sleep, knowing that Conrad is just in the next room makes me giddy with nerves and excitement. I keep thinking of how his hands felt on the skin of my waist earlier today. I can still feel them, it’s like his touch Is branded into my skin. I throw the covers back, grab my phone off the nightstand and sneak out of bed. I pad over to the door and open it as slowly as possible shutting it silently behind me. I am weary of the hardwood floors underneath my feet as I walk over to Conrad’s room as lightly as possible. I don’t knock terrified that even the slightest sound will wake someone up. I shut the door and turn my body to face the bed, Conrad is on the side of the bed closest to the windows, he is asleep on his back, one hand behind his head one on his stomach. I pad over to his bed and get in on the side closest to the door, he startles awake when the bed dips. 

He’s always been a light sleeper even as kids. When I would wake up from a nightmare and start to cry he would be the only one to wake up, Jere and Steven the heavy sleepers. He would come and slip into my bed next to me and hug me as I cried, he would tell me it was just a dream and make me talk about it. Then he would stay with me until I was done crying and my breathing returned to normal before going back to his bed. This was back when us summer kids shared one room, up until Conrad was twelve and wanted his own bedroom. “He’s a growing boy and growing boys need their privacy,” Susannah said. He moved out at the beginning of that summer, Susannah letting him pick the paint and furniture he wanted. Letting him decorate it exactly as he liked. By the end of that summer all of us had our own rooms. Susannah and I spent hours picking out the wallpaper and days upon days scouring antique stores up and down the Cape for my bed frame and vanity. My mom tried to stop her but it didn’t work, it was the most fun I had just spending time with Susannah. She would take me out to lunch and would even secretly take me clothes shopping, saying, “I don’t have a daughter, you are as close I’ll ever get. My special girl. I love spoiling you.” I always dreamed of her coming prom dress shopping with me and my mom, I just hope she gets to.

Conrad takes me out of my depressing thoughts by whispering, “Belly, what are you doing in here?”

I stop with one knee on the bed, “I didn’t want to sleep alone. Is this okay?”

“No. I mean yes. It’s just our parents will have a conniption if they catch you in here. Not to mention what Steven will do to me if he sees you in my bed.”

“I’ll set an alarm for early and I’ll sneak out. Is that okay?” I ask looking at him questioningly. 

“Yeah of course,” he pulls back the covers on my side and I get in next to him. I hesitate for a second on whether I should stay on my side or cuddle up to him but he decides for me. He opens his arms and I slide into them, my head on his chest listening to his heartbeat, our legs tangle together and his arm cradles my head. “Goodnight Belly,” he whispers to me. 

“Goodnight Conrad,” I whisper back. I fall asleep easily listening to his breathing and heartbeat. I dream of Cousins that night, just me and Conrad on the beach in the middle of summer lounging around sharing smiles and fleeting touches. 

I am woken up abruptly by the sound of my alarm, the sun has barely risen. I quickly reach for my phone on the nightstand and turn it off. Conrad is waking up behind me, we shifted in the night. He is spooning me from behind his arms wrapped around my waist right under my bust. He pulls me in tighter my back flush to his front. He starts to kiss my neck, “Morning,” he mumbles against it sending vibrations across my skin and I let out a breathy sigh, my hand comes up behind his head, my fingers threading through his strands. He continues to kiss along my neck eliciting gasps and sighs from me. 

I can’t take it anymore I turn over to face him and bring his lips to mine kissing him roughly. It’s too much for being so early but I can’t help it, I want him. I grab his hand from where it is rests on my waist bringing it down to the hem of my pajama pants. He breaks away from me, “Belly what-?”

“Touch me,” I whisper looking him in the eye. 

“A-are you sure?”

“Yes please Conrad.” His eyes never leave mine as his hand goes under my pajama bottoms and down to my center, when he touches my clit for the first time my mouth drops in an O and I take shuddering breath. “Is that okay?” He asks worrriedly. “Perfect. Keep going,” I say as my voice shakes from nerves. He puts the slightest bit of pressure on it and it sends a shot of pleasure up my spine. “Conrad,” I whine lowly. He continues to stare into my eyes as he gives me pleasure. He moves his fingers around trying different pressures and motions continuously asking if I’m okay and if I like it. The answer is almost always yes if the answer is no he tries something else. I’ve given myself an orgasm once or twice I’m a sixteen year old girl, but I’ve never had someone else touch me, someone else work my body like this. It’s overwhelming. I throw my head back in a moan and Conrad leans in kissing my exposed neck. 

“You’re so beautiful Belly,” he says against it sending vibrations down the column of my throat. I bring my hand to his hair pulling him closer. “Conrad I’m so close,” I whisper. Most guys would go faster and ruin it but Conrad doesn’t he keeps his pace and soon I’m shattering in his arms. I start to moan but he brings his lips to mine swallowing it. He kisses me through it, his hands never stopping until I push them away as I’m too sensitive. He takes his hand out of my pants and wipes his fingers on his own. He presses kisses on both of my cheeks before pulling me into a deep kiss. When we finally pull away I look out the window and see the sun has risen higher, sunlight streaming through the windows. “I have to go,” I tell him as my heart rate slows. I place one last kiss on his lips before fixing my pajama bottoms and getting out of bed. “I’ll see you later,” I tell him, he sits up in bed and watches me go. I shut the door quietly behind me and turn back to the hallway closing my eyes and resting against the door smiling wide to myself.

“What the hell are you doing?” I hear hissed at me. I whip my head to the other side of the hallway and see Steven standing there with a death glare. Fuck. He caught me coming out of Conrad’s room. I groan internally, Why didn’t I look beforehand?

“I am going to kill him,” he states and goes for the door I am leaning against. I quickly intercept him and drag him to my room pushing him in roughly. I shut the door and whip around to him, “Do not tell mom or Adam. They will freak.”

“As they should, you are sixteen you shouldn’t be having sex,” he whisper yells at me pulling a disgusted face at the thought. 

“We weren’t doing anything,” I lie easily. “We were sleeping, we are not having sex!” At least that’s the truth. 

“You shouldn’t be sleeping with him either. What the fuck were you thinking?”

“I wanted to sleep next to my boyfriend it’s not a big deal. You slept at Allisons house all the time when you guys dated and you were only fifteen!”

“That’s different.”

“Why? Because I am a girl?” I challenge him.

“No, because you are my baby sister and he is my best friend.”

“Get over it Steven. Might I remind you that I caught you making out with my best friend and who knows what would have happened had I not walked in.” He goes slack jawed at my words. “Look, I know it’s weird me being with Conrad but you have to get used to it. Okay? I like him, I really like him and I want it to work with me and him. So please don’t say anything to anyone about what you saw. Please Steven. Mom already has enough to deal with, with Susannah and everything.” I plead with him through my eyes. 

He sighs heavily, “Fine but I am having a conversation with him later.”

“No Steven don’t.”

“Yes, I didn’t get to put the fear of god in him at the summer house but I can now.”

“Steven-“ I start to protest but he holds his hand up stopping me. 

“Not up for discussion. Now I left the room to go pee so I am going to do that.” He heads for the door but stops short, “Just- Just don’t do anything stupid and-“ he grimaces, “If you do anything at least use protection. Mom will kill you if you get pregnant.”

Now I’m getting the sex talk from my brother? Oh god. “Susannah and mom already gave me the talk at twelve and again yesterday. Adam also talked to Conrad and gave him condoms for no reason so please for the love of god quit while you’re ahead.” I beg of him. 

“Fine, I’ll lecture Conrad instead. Now go to sleep,” he commands before leaving my room shutting the door behind him. I roll my eyes at his back and climb into my bed. I lay down thinking over the past two hours in my head and squeal quietly to myself before closing my eyes. I dream of Conrad and I in the summer sharing a bed and waking up every morning together.

When I wake up for the second time that day it’s ten o’clock and my mom is yelling at me to get breakfast. Conrad is heading to his room as I’m leaving mine and he stops me, “Morning.”

“Morning,” he pulls me in for a kiss and I melt into him. 

He pulls back after a minute, “Steven, Jere and I are heading out. We are gonna go to the rink in Southie and play some hockey. I’m not sure when I’ll be back.”

“That’s fine. I’m spending the day with the moms. I’ll see you tonight,” I smirk. 

He laughs softly, “Yeah I’ll see you tonight,” then he leans down pressing a kiss to my lips.

I spend the day with the moms, we go shopping at the Burlington Mall and despite my mothers protests Susannah buys me a bunch of new clothes which I thank her profusely for. We have to take a break after a few hours as Susannah gets tired but she reassures me that she’s fine. We go and eat lunch at the Cheesecake Factory where Susannah brings up me and Conrad again. “I won’t embarrass you again by bringing up you two being intimate,” she says with a wry smile making me grimace, “But how are things going with you two?”

A smile makes its way to my face, “Good really good.” My mom and her share a secret smile, “What?” I ask. 

My mom just laughs, “I owe Susannah twenty bucks.”

“Why?” I ask confused. 

“Because about ten years ago she bet me that you two would end up together.”

“WHAT?” I exclaim, heads turn towards us and I blush profusely. Quieter I say, “You two have been making bets on our life?”

Susannah shrugs, “What else can you do as parents?”

“Maybe not bet on your children’s lives," I tell her. 

She snorts and pops a fry in her mouth, “When you have children you’ll see the light.”

My mom points a finger at me, “And that won’t be for at least another ten years. Do I make myself clear?”

“Oh my god! Yes mom! Will you please drop this subject? Conrad and I are not having sex,” I say exasperated, I cross my arms and fall back against the booth. 

“We’re just worried, Bean,” she says softly. 

Susannah jumps in, “We don’t want you to make any decisions you could later regret.”

“All we’re saying is go slow. Listen to your brain.”

“And your heart," Susannah adds. I huff again but nod my head taking their words to heart.

Conrad finds me later in the den, moms went grocery shopping for dinner and the guys just headed upstairs to shower. We have at least thirty minutes of alone time before the guys get back. “Hi,” he says smiling. 

“Hi,” I grin back before pulling him into a kiss. It gets heated fast our tongues tangle together, our breaths mingling in the air between us. He slowly lays me back against the couch and I gladly let him. My hands travel up to his hair pulling him in closer.  

“Our moms bet on us,” I tell him a little while later.

“What?” He asks confused. 

“Yep, Susannah bet my mom that we would end up together."

He lets out a scoff, “You’re joking.”

“Nope, they bet on it ten years ago. Ten years ago, Connie!”

“I guess they knew it before we did. If only I had gotten my head out of my ass sooner.”

“It’s fine, Conrad. We’ve got infinity.” He grins back at me and pulls me in for a short kiss. When he pulls back he whispers against my lips, "Yeah, we've got infinity."

That night I sneak into bed once I know everybody is asleep. This time Conrad is sitting up waiting up for me in bed. “Hi,” he says smiling at me shyly.

“Hi,” I don’t sit on the bed next to him instead I get bold and straddle his legs. I can tell how nervous he is, his hands shake slightly as he brings them up to my waist. 

“What are you doing?” He asks nervously.

“I want you to touch me again,” I whisper into the night. He doesn’t say anything at first and I become unsure of myself, I start to get off of him thinking he doesn’t want me when his grip on my waist tightens. “No don’t. I want that too, I was just taken off guard,” he tells me. I look into his eyes and I know he’s not lying. He smiles shyly at me before kissing me. It starts off slow and sweet just lips sliding against each other. It soon turns passionate he flips us over so I’m laying on my back, he kisses me deeper pressing me back into the pillows, his hand travels from my face down my neck, to my shoulder, his fingers run along my arm leaving tingles in their wake. His hand goes to the bottom of my pajama top fingering one of the buttons. He breaks the kiss pulling back slightly to look me in the eye, “Can I?” He asks hesitantly, I nod and he begins to unbutton my pajama top It’s a light pink short sleeve button up pajama top from Victoria’s secret, I’m wearing the matching set. He unbuttons my shirt slowly, from top to bottom before pushing it open slightly, he doesn’t pull his lips away from mine even as I feel the cold air of his bedroom sweep across the bare skin of my chest. 

He puts his hand on my bare stomach sending shivers through me, he slides it around to my waist and then around to my back, I arch my back mushing my chest into his wanting, needing to be closer. He leaves his hand there, his thumb rubbing circles on it. Sparks are shooting up and down my back making me go crazy from anticipation, I can’t take it, “Touch me,” I mumble against his lips.

He finally listens and brings his hand to my waist sliding up until he’s cupping my breast in his hand. “Is this okay?” He asks.

“Yes. More Conrad please,” I whine lowly. He smiles against my lips but does as I ask. He gently massages my breasts in his hands, his thumbs go to my nipples rubbing them in circles. I let out tiny moans and he swallows them as he kisses me. But then his lips trail lower going to my neck then my chest. He pauses at the tops of my breasts looking up at me in question and I nod. Ever so slowly he takes my nipple into his mouth, sucking and nibbling on it lightly. “Connie,” I moan softly, my hands come up to his hair holding his head in my hands. He moves to the underside of my breast kissing softly as he makes his way to the other side and giving my other nipple the same attention. 

He kisses down my stomach and stops at the edge of my waistband, he rests his chin on my stomach looking up at me, “Do you trust me?” He asks softly.

I smile and whisper back, “With my life.” He smiles pressing a kiss to my stomach before hooking his fingers into the waistband of my shorts pulling them down my legs throwing them onto the floor. His eye go wide at the sight of me, “You’re not wearing underwear,” he whispers in shock.

I bluish deeply, “I didn’t see the point.”

Conrad just stares at me in awe for a moment before he moves back up my body and kisses me deeply. “You’re so beautiful,” he whispers before kissing me again. After a moment he starts to move down my body again, leaving hot wet kisses as he goes. He kisses every freckle on my stomach before going to my center. He asks for my permission one last time and I gladly give it to him. He kisses my thighs first, just the tops and then he slowly makes his way inward. I let out small gasps evrytime I feel his tongue peek out hitting my heated skin. 

I can feel him hesitate for a moment, my mouth opens to tell him he doesn’t have to but then his mouth finds my center. My breath hitches and my fingers curl around the sheets bunching them up. His mouth works my clit, exulting whimpers from my throat. 

He pulls away and looks up at me, "C-can I add a finger?" He asks nervously. I nod but he just shakes his head, "I need a verbal response, Belly."

My heart warms at his words and I know there is no other person I'd rather be doing this with, "Yes." He smiles and goes back to his ministrations. A finger enters me slowly, my head tips back, my breath catching in my throat at the intrusion. 

His head moves to my lower stomach, "Are you okay?" He asks, pressing a kiss to my skin. 

"Yes," I say nodding my head quickly, "Keep going." His mouth moves back to my clit. His finger thrusts in and out of me slowly, my body getting used to the intrusion. A pressure starts to build in my lower belly, similar to last night but better. 

Conrad adds a second finger after a little while, it's uncomfortable at first, all that's ever been inside me has been my fingers and one of his is twice my own. I tense for a moment and he can tell, "Do you want me to stop?" He asks stilling his mouth and fingers.

"No, ju-just give me a second," I whisper. He nods and waits as I slowly start to relax. "P-please Connie," I beg, my fingers tugging softly on his hair. His fingers slowly thrust in and out of me, a moan tearing through my throat. I bite my lip hard trying to muffle it. 

His mouth returns to my clit and he's working me up again with every stroke of his tongue and thrust of his fingers. My senses are invaded by him, the smell of his sheets, the touch of his fingers, the sound of his mouth on my center. He is the first guy to ever do this, to ever take care of me and touch me like this. 

The pressure in my stomach is building, it's getting hard to control my moans. My breathing is labored, the moans I’m suppressing coming out as pants. Conrad reaches out to where my other hand is on the bed fisting the sheets, he takes it threading our fingers together and rests it between my breast on my sternum. “Con- Conrad, I’m so close.”

He doesn’t stop even though I pull on his hair, he continues the strokes of his tongue. As I start to hit my peak I have to pull my hand from his hair slapping it over my mouth. I arch my back pushing my center further into his mouth, I’m trying my best to smother my groans as my orgasm crashes over me. There’s a fire burning inside of me, 

He looks up at me with a glint in his eye, “Come for me, Isabel." The pressure breaks and I moan into my hand as my orgasm rips through me. His fingers and mouth don't stop, he works me through it. When the fog clears I pull on his hair slightly and I feel his fingers leaving me, leaving behind a dull ache in their absence. He presses one last kiss to my clit before kissing his way up my body pressing kisses to any part he can reach, my stomach, hips, breasts, neck, cheeks before pulling me into a kiss. I can taste myself on his tongue, it's a mix of salt and tangy but I can still taste him. 

"Are you okay?" He asks pulling away. 

"Yeah, I'm okay," I tell him. 

"Are you sure?" He asks. "I didn't go too far?" There's worry in his eyes and a frown on his lips, his brow furrowed. I bring my hand up and smooth it out, "I promise, you didn't go too far. I wanted this Conrad." He nods his head softly and brings me into another kiss. I start to trail my hand down his stomach, when I get to the band of his shorts he stops me. I pull back to look at him, "You don't want me to?" I ask. 

"Not tonight. Tonight was about you," He tells me. I nod my head and kiss him again. He helps me get dressed, kissing me as he buttons up my shirt so different from earlier. He pulls me into his chest kissing my forehead before laying back. We fall asleep a mess of tangled limbs, satiated and happy.

I’m woken up abruptly by water hitting my face, I open my eyes to find Steven holding an empty cup over Conrad’s face whose face is wet and the collar of his shirt soaked with water. Some of it splashed onto me, “What the hell Steven?!” I whisper yell at him. 

“You’re lucky I didn’t wake him up with a punch in the nose. Get your ass back into your room Belly. I wanna have a talk with Conrad.”

I narrow my eyes at him, “Steven-“

“Go to your room Belly. Or I’ll tell moms and Adam that you’ve slept in here two nights in a row,” he threatens. 

“Fine,” but before I get out of bed I lean over and pull Conrad into a long kiss just to piss Steven off. When I pull away Cinrad is staring at me shocked, “I’ll see you later,” I whisper to him. I turn back to Steven and stick my tongue out at him before getting out of bed and leaving the room.

Conrad’s POV

Oh my god she’s trying to get me killed. She doesn’t like me she has basically signed my death warrant. I have never been more grateful in my life that I put her clothes back on her last night. Steven’s eyeing me like he knows what I did to his sister last night and I have never been more scared in my entire life.  “Steven-“

“No, you’re going to listen while I talk. If you so much as hurt my baby sister I’ll kill you. You better not make her cry or I’ll beat you so bad you’ll never be able to carry a football again. You will not pressure her to do anything she isn’t ready for. If I hear that you have forced her to go faster than she wants I will have your grave dug faster than you can blink. And if you do ever,-“ he gags pretending to vomit, “Have sex with her you better use protection because if you get her pregnant I will-“

“Kill me? Yeah I got that.”

“No. I’ll have you married to her so fast your head will spin.”

My eyes almost pop out of my head, “Married?”

He nods his head in determination, “Married. My sister won’t be a single mom. But it’s not gonna come to that right Conrad?” He settles me with a glare. 

“I’m not an idiot, Steve. I know how to use protection but it’s not even an issue, we are not having sex. Scouts honor,” I say holding up the salute and quickly putting them back down remembering how I touched Belly with those fingers last night, how she came around them, her body shaking with pleasure that I had to bring my hand to her stomach to keep her in place. She’s always been beautiful but last night she was a goddess. I quickly shake my head of those thoughts, getting an erection right now is the last thing I need considering Steven is right in front of me. 

He eyes me warily and for a second I think he’s gained ESP and can now read my mind is about to kill but he just nods, “Good. Glad we have an understanding.” He turns around to go back to his room, his hand is on the door when he stops and turns around, “Don’t even think about sleeping in her room when you come over next. It’s not happening.”

(Author’s note: It 100% did happen. This time Conrad snuck into her room and they did way more than sleep.)

“Didn’t even cross my mind,” total lie. It’s crossed my mind every second of every day since I came over last and she fell asleep on the couch with me. Steven doesn’t know about that though. He finally, finally leaves the room and I breathe a sigh of relief. I flop back onto my bed thinking of last nights events and I can feel a stirring in my pajama pants. Fuuuccckkk, I let out a soft groan and throw my covers back and pad over to my bathroom to take the longest and coldest shower of my life. 

Belly’s POV

Susannah says goodbye to us inside the house, her immune system is weakened because of the treatment and no one is taking any chances of her catching a cold. Jere waves goodbye on the front step barely giving me a glance before heading back inside. Conrad walks me all the way to the car and kisses me softly so different from last night. A honk comes from behind us and I flip Steven off through the window. Pulling back slightly Conrad gives me one more kiss and says, “I’ll be down in two weeks, okay?”

“Okay,” I say nodding slightly, “Do you think we could maybe have a repeat of last night?”

He smiles and it leaves me breathless, “If that’s what you want I’ll give you as many repeats as you ask for.”

“I like the sounds of that,” I say smirking before pulling him into another kiss. Steven breaks us apart with a long drawn out honk. I break away from Conrad and yell, “FINE! STOP IT STEVEN!”  He glares at us through the window and I turn back to Conrad, “I’ll see you next week.”

“See you next week,” he confirms before pressing as kiss to my lips. He opens my door for me allowing me to get in. Once he shuts the door he gives me one last wave before heading inside. Steven looks at me through the rearview mirror giving me a look of disgust, “You two are disgusting.”

“Shut up, Steven!” I yell at him.

Mom sighs heavily, “Leave your sister alone and drive Steven.” He huffs, rolling his eyes and pulls away from the curb. 

My phone buzzes in my pocket, I take it out and there’s a text from Conrad. 

Conrad∞: I’ll be thinking about last night for the rest of my life, I’ll see you in a few weeks😘

I send him a smiley face in response, I put my phone down on the seat beside and lean back into my seat smiling like a crazy person. My mom catches my eye in the mirror and gives me a knowing look, I blush and look away. I am not prepared for the conversation I have to have with her tonight. I let out a sigh and look out the window watching the houses pass as we leave the Fishers neighborhood.

That night I knock lightly on my moms door I hear her say come in and I open it to see her laying in bed reading Cleveland’s book. They broke up about a week ago and I know she still hasn’t fully gotten over him. I know how much she liked him but she’s putting all her energy into Susannah right now. Once she gets better hopefully they can find their way back to each other. 

“What’s up, Bean?” She asks as she sits up in bed putting the book down on the night table. 

“Umm I wanted to talk to you about something.”

“Okay,” she sits cross legged and pats the spot in front of her inviting me to sit. I close the door to her bedroom and make my way to the bed mirroring her position. 

“Well you know how you and Susannah were asking about me and Conrad and if we had done anything yet?”

She sucks in a breath bracing herself, “Yes.”

“Well we haven’t had sex yet but I think we might. Eventually. Sooner rather than later,” I tell her as I look down at my hands playing with them. 

“Okay.”

“And I think it might be a good idea if I go on birth control.”

I wait with bated breath as she processes what I said. “Bean, did something happen at the house?”

“No, no. But I love him and I want to be with him, not just yet but eventually and I want to be prepared.”

“Okay, I’m glad that you came to me about this. I will make an appointment with Dr. Covey for this week. Okay?”

“Okay.” I get up to leave but stop before I can step towards the door, “Thank you mom. Thank you for being so cool about this.”

She smiles and gets up from the bed pulling me into a hug, “Of course Bean. I’m always here, whatever you need. I love you.”

“I love you too,” she gives me a kiss on the cheek before breaking the hug. I leave her room shutting the door behind me. Once it’s closed I sag against it blowing out a breath. I have a cool mom.

I have to call Taylor.

Laurel’s POV

Holy fuck. I have to call Beck.  First I need a joint.

Chapter Text

It's been a few hours since Belly came to Laurel and asked to go on birth control. After Laurel took a deep breath, took the information in and smoked a little she called her best friend. Both women feel like they're teenagers again, talking low on the phone late at night. Only they're not teenagers, they're in their forties, they're mothers and Susannah is in bed next to her sleeping husband. They have bigger things to deal with than Brian Adler asking Jessica Stanley to prom instead of Susannah. 

"She asked to go on birth control Beck," Laurel whispers to her best friend, her knees to her chest.

"Laur, this is a good thing, this way we know they're being safe," Susannah says trying to be the voice of reason, her best friend tends to be a little too high strung when it comes to her daughter. 

"But she's just a baby. She's my baby. She shouldn't be having sex. She should be doing the kissing and handholding, nothing else," the mother exclaims quietly, her arms waving around like a crazy person. 

Susannah lets out a small giggle at her best friends frantic tone before bringing her hand up trying to quickly smother it, "She's growing up, Laur. She's sixteen. And from what I can tell they're in love." She watched them all weekend, she saw them holding hands happily at the dinner table, the way they laughed together and seemed happy even in the quiet moments, happy to just be in each others presence. She saw how they would sneak away when they thought no one was looking, she even caught them kissing sweetly at the door when the Conklins first arrived. Susannah saw the look in her son's eye when he looked at the young girl, she saw it back even when he was a kid and she knows her son is deeply in love with her goddaughter. 

Laurel shakes her head at her best friends words, "She's only sixteen. You know I love Conrad but I don't want her tied to the first guy who shows interest in her."

"Conrad wasn't the first guy, there was Cam and even Jere and I heard there were some other guys looking at her at Cousins last year. They're soulmates, you can't fight that. They've been tied together by a string since they were kids, it was inevitable. Let them figure things out. Let her be a woman, it's what she is."

Deep down Laurel knows she's right, her baby girl isn't a baby anymore or really a girl, she's a woman. She also knows what she has to do next, "I have to tell John."

"Why?" Susannah asks, her brow furrowing. 

"This is a huge development in his daughters life, if he kept this from me I'd kill him."

"You're better than me, I didn't tell Adam when Conrad started having sex with his girlfriend Caitlin or when Jere first had sex with that girl Anna in Cousins. He was late on both sex talk too." She lets out a big sigh, "It's a wonder I'm not a grandmother."

"You what?" She hears from beside her, Adam now on his elbows looking up at her with disbelief in his eyes. 

"Shhhh," she says pushing him back down by the shoulder, "Nothing, go back to bed."

He doesn't listen pushing her hand away, "You knew our sons were sexually active and you didn't tell me?" He asks incredulously sitting up fully. 

"It's not like you were home for me to tell you," she retorts. 

Adam rolls his eyes, everything comes back to me not being around enough, "You still should have told me, I'm their dad. Are Belly and Conrad having sex? I warned him about being careful, I gave him condoms on Thanksgiving."

Susannah stares at him in shock, Laurel all the way in Chesterbrook is much the same, " You what?" She yells. Susannah puts her on speaker so the woman can hear Adam explain himself. 

"I gave him condoms. Told him not to be an idiot," he doesn't tell his wife that he threatened him, he knows it won't go over well. 

"Why don't you just buy them a hotel room next time?" Laurel grumbles. 

Adam stares at the phone blankly, "Did you want grandchildren before the end of next year?" When he doesn't get a response out of them he nods his head in vindication, "That's what I thought. Conrad promised me they weren't having sex. Did he lie to me?"

"No," Susannah reassures, "Belly asked to be put on birth control. Now, go back to bed so I can talk to Laurel." Adam mumbles something about a third person in his marriage as he puts his head on the pillow bringing another one over his ears. The blonde sitting up in bed gathers all of the self control she can to not hit him and yell that he was the one who brought a third person into their marriage, practically wrecking it but she keeps quiet. She's forgiven. him. Well, as best she can, it's more about needing him right now with everything going on.

She brings the phone to her, taking it off speaker, "I'm sorry, he's an idiot." 

"It's fine, I guess he did the right thing for once," that makes Susannah let out a snort, "It also proves my point, John needs to know. He would want to know even if it is going to make him extremely uncomfortable." She drags her hand over her face in exasperation, "God I need another joint."

"Calm down Laur, it'll be fine. Slowly ease him into it. It's not like they're gonna have sex tomorrow."

"No they're not but Conrad is coming over in two weeks, I need to have another talk with Belly before that happens. I need to make sure she's ready." Silently, Laurel hopes her daughter isn't ready and she'll remain her baby forever but that's a pipe dream and she knows it. She tips her head back against the headboard overwhelmed. 

Susannah gets an idea, "Why don't you bring her down here on Friday when you come for my appointment and we can go out to tea after like we used to do when she was little and we can give her the sex talk again. Make sure she's really ready."

"Are you sure you're up for that Beck?" She doesn't want her pushing it, the treatment is going well and she's feeling good but things could always change. 

"I'm feeling great, Laur. I wouldn't offer if I didn't think I could handle it. I want to do this. We have to do this. I'm going to have a talk with Conrad as well before he heads back to school." In her mind she's already listing every topic she has to go over with her son.

Her list is interrupted by a pillow muffled voice saying, "I already put the fear of God in him. He won't do anything under either of our roofs."

"Go to bed," she commands.

He takes the pillow off his face and juts his chin at her, "You go to bed."

Before she can continue the argument like they're ten Laurel butts in, "He's right you should go to bed, I have to think. I'll call you tomorrow after I talk with Belly and John."

"Alright, night Laur."

"Night Beck," the call drops and Laurels phone lands on the bed next to her, her head landing with a thump against the headboard, now to figure out how to tell John his daughter is going to have sex. Fuuuucccccckkkk.

  Laurel stares at her phone that's laying on the dining room table, she was supposed to call him ten minutes ago but she hasn't quite worked up the courage just yet. She bites her thumb nail practically gnawing at it. She's already masticated her other nine digits, some bleeding slightly. She looks at the clock on the kitchen wall and sees that her ex-husbands lunch hour is almost up. She needs to make this call and now before the kids come home. 

She picks the phone up and calls him, thankfully he answers on the second ring and her waiting isn't prolonged. "Hey Laur, what's up?"

"We need to talk," she says trying to be calm but her voice shaking slightly. 

"Should I be nervous? That's how you started the conversation when you asked for the divorce," he says laughing softly. When his ex doesn't say anything the humor is wiped away and he sits up in his seat in his office, "Is everything okay Laurel? Is it Susannah? Did the treatment stop working?"

"No, no. Susannah is fine," she reassures. "I-it's Belly."

John's palms start to sweat, "Is she okay? Did she get hurt at school?"

"No, she's fine John. Physically, mentally, emotionally, she's okay."

"Okay then tell me what is going on," he urges, he can't take the not knowing. 

"Well you know she is growing up, she's sixteen now," she says nervously. 

"Yeah, I may not have been there for her birth but I do know how old our daughter is," he jokes. 

"Well, she's a woman now and um," she bites her lip in nervousness, "She's doing more womanly things now."

"If this is you trying to tell me about her period or her needing a bra we already went through this a few years back, it doesn't phase me anymore."

Laurel can't take it anymore, she blurts it out, "Belly asked to go on birth control, she thinks she's gonna have sex with Conrad soon." 

...

The words just hang there in between them for a few moments. 

Then, "Oh." Comes from the other line. A few more seconds then a more pained, "Oh," John thinks he might die. He wants to. He wants to crawl into a hole and die. His baby girl is going to have sex. 

"John, you okay over there?" Laurel asks after more pained silence. No response. "Look, I figured you'd want to know, I mean we promised each other to keep the other apprised of the going ons in our kids' lives. And while I know it's an awkward topic and no dad wants to know their daughter is having sex-well is going to have sex-"

"Laur-"

"-I thought you needed to know. Now Belly has assured me that they haven't done anything yet-"

"-Laurel-"

"-but I don't know if I fully believe her, I kind of want to lean on Steven and see if he knows anything but I think Conrad would be d-"

" Laurel," John yells trying to get his ex-wife to stop talking.

"Sorry."

He lets out a huge sigh leaning back in his desk chair, "She really said she wants to go on birth control?"

"Yeah but this is a good thing," she tries to sound optimistic.

"A good thing? Our daughter having sex at sixteen is a good thing?" He asks incredulously. 

"She came to me about this, she didn't go behind my back and just go to a clinic. She talked to me, she was honest about why she wanted it. She trusts me. That's all you can hope for with teenagers."

"Yeah I guess so," he lets out another heavy sigh, "Our baby girl isn't a baby anymore Laur."

"No she's not," she says sadly. She thinks back to the day Belly was born, she wasn't that pretty at first, covered in a bunch of stuff that Laurel didn't-and still doesn't-want to think about but when they wiped her down, put a cap over her conehead and swaddled her she was the most beautiful baby she had ever seen. 

She remembers her first day of school, Belly had always been a daddy's girl but that day when Laurel dropped her off she held onto her leg and cried saying, "Don't leave Mommy. I wanna stay with you." She had her hair in little pigtails in the most beautiful pink dress that Susannah had gotten for her at this boutique in Cousins, with her patent leather Mary Jane's on her feet. She was the picture of innocence. It killed Laurel to see her daughter crying as the teacher gently pulled her away and told Laurel gently to leave. It broke her heart so much that she ended up crying in the parking lot for a half hour afterwards. It wasn't like that with Steven, he ran in right away and started playing with the other kids but her baby girl cried everyday that week at drop-off. Now that little girl in the pink dress and adorable pigtails is all grown up. She's a junior in high school. She can drive. She has a boyfriend that worships the ground she walks on and she's going to have sex with him. "Our babies are all grown up, John."

He thinks about the college student who just came to him about a personal problem and he says to Laurel, "Eh, I think we still have some parenting to do. They're always gonna need us, Laur."

Laurel wipes a tear from her face, her eyes connecting with a photo of 3 and 2 year old Steven and Belly playing in the backyard, grins on their faces, if she listens hard enough she can almost hear their screeches and giggles as they run around. "God I hope so."

Chapter Text

Conrad's POV 

There's a knock on my door as I'm packing to head back to Brown, "Come in," I call out. The door opens and my mom walks in with a smile, "You almost done packing?" She asks.

"Yeah, I'm gonna head out soon, Monday night traffic is the worst. I want to get a jump on it before my hour and fifteen drive doesn't turn into a two hour drive." My Monday classes had been cancelled and I am glad I didn't have to drive during Sunday night traffic. 

"Mmmm," my mom hums acknowledgment as she looks around my room, her eyes landing on the picture of me and Belly tucked into the mirror on my bureau. It's a picture of us from a few years back, the first time I ever taught her to dance. I remember that day well, the way she looked in her glasses, her hand in mine, shocks sparking up my arm. My mom presented me with the picture when we got back home at the end of August and it's been there ever since.

She takes the picture in hand and studies it, "I love this picture, Belly was so happy about getting those steps down right."

"She was doing fine by herself, I just kept her on beat."

"You've always been so sweet to her Connie, even when you were kids. I had always hoped you two would end up together-"

"Yeah I know, Belly told me about the bet," I tell her, giving her a slight glare.

She rolls her eyes at me, "As I was saying, I should've realized sooner that you had feelings for her.  I can't believe I was so oblivious." She continues to look at the picture of me and Belly with a fondness in her eyes. 

"Mom, I know you didn't come in here just to look at a picture. What's up?" I ask.

She shakes her head laughing, "Always so serious, Connie."

"Mom," I say, giving her a knowing look.

She sighs and puts the picture back on my bureau, "Fine, you're right. I just wanted to have a little talk with you before you leave," she leans back against the wooden bureau to look at me.

"Okayyy, what about?" Why can't she ever spit anything out?

"I know you and Belly's relationship is progressing and I think it's time we have a refresher on safe sex and consent." Well, she spit that out.

I continue packing my clothes wanting to bolt as soon as my bag is packed, "MOM! We do not need to do this okay? I am in college and dad already gave me condoms. Besides, I'm not exactly a virgin."

"No but Belly is," she points out.

"I know that, I won't make her do anything she doesn't want." I'd kill myself before I'd ever hurt her. 

"I know you won't Connie but I'm still going to go over it with you. Now sit," she demands. I huff and sit on the edge of my mattress.

"Now, protection is non-negotiable, it is to always be used. No matter what. I know Belly is going on birth control-"

My head snaps up, "What?"

"Y-you didn't know?" She asks, staring into my eyes. 

"No, she didn't tell me. She doesn't exactly have to, it's her decision."

My mom nods her head in approval, "Good, I'm glad to hear that. Even though she's gonna go on birth control you should still wear condoms. The pill can fail. Condoms break but it's always better to be safe than sorry. You and Belly are too young to be parents. I know one day you two will give me beautiful grand babies," she says with a teasing smile on her face, making my cheeks heat up and turn bright red, "But I can wait."

Maybe she can't, a voice whispers in the back of my mind. I'm reminded of the big black cloud looming over our heads. Her cancer which is still this big huge thing no one ever truly wants to talk about least of all my mum. She's always so optimistic and never wants to talk about the bad things. She might never get to see Jere and Steven graduate or any of us get married. She might never get to take Belly to pick out a wedding dress. She might never get to meet her grandkids. It's like a stab in the heart, she'd be the best grandmother. 

"Connie," she says softly, trying to get me out of my head. "Are you listening to me?"

"Yeah, yes mom, I'm listening. But we haven't even done anything."

"Really?" She asks skeptically. 

"Yes," I say resolutely. She won't break me, what happened in here between me and Belly is just that, between me and Belly. 

"Ya know, your dad told me he caught you two on the couch late at night. Said it looked pretty hot and heavy." 

"Dad's an idiot."

"Conrad," she says warningly. 

"And he's overreacting. We were kissing. Clothes on, hands over clothing." At least I can tell the truth about that.

"Okay sweetheart, I believe you. I just want you to remember what I just told you and that no means no. Full stop. Okay?" She says, her eyes boring into mine.

"I would never do anything she didn't want mom. Ever. I'd rather die than hurt her like that," I mean every word. Hurting her would kill me. 

"I know Connie, don't worry. I just had to go over it again. Now, finish packing, you need to get on the road before traffic builds up," she says moving towards my door. I watch her leave, shutting the door behind her. I throw myself back against my bed, a heavy sigh making its way out of my mouth. How many more talks are we gonna get like this? I shake my head, running my hand over my face, I get up and continue packing wanting to get out of here as soon as possible.

Belly's POV

I'm sitting on my bed, my textbooks spread out around me trying to figure out how to do this impossible trig problem when there's a knock on my door, "Yeah?" I call out, never taking my eyes off the paper. 

My door opens, my mom comes in, "Hey Bean."

"Hey mom, what's up?" I ask. Is that an acute or obtuse triangle? I turn back the pages of my textbook to remind myself of the difference. 

"How do you feel about skipping school on Friday?" She asks. 

My head snaps up, finally tearing my eyes off the paper, "What?" My mom never lets me skip school, she once made me go when I had the flu until it got so bad she had to pick me up. 

"I asked if you wanted to skip school on Friday?" She repeats, a wry smile on her face. 

"Is there a special occasion?" I ask.

"Well, Susannah has her appointment Friday morning and she wanted you to come down. We'd leave Thursday after school. We can go to that afternoon tea we always used to go to," she says enticingly.

"Uh yeah sure. Sounds good." She nods and starts to leave the room but stops and turns around, "Oh I uh made you the appointment for tomorrow after school. I'll pick you up and we can go straight from school."

"Okay thanks," I say awkwardly. She hasn't talked to me about our conversation on Saturday night, I figured she was just going to pretend it never happened. 

She reaches into her back-pocket and pulls out some papers, "I also printed you out some information on the different types of birth control, you should read it tonight and we can talk about it on the way to the doctors tomorrow."

I take them from her hesitantly, "Oh um, thank you but I actually did some research already. Taylor helped me."

My mom's face falls just slightly making me feel like the worst daughter ever. "Okay, did you figure out what form you were going to go with?"

"Yeah, I think I'm gonna go with the pill. An IUD seems like too much pain and the implant seems to be too risky. Obviously I'll listen to what Dr. Covey says and if he thinks something else might be better than I'll listen to him." My moms eyes are shining with tears as she looks at me, "Mom what's wrong?"

"Nothing, nothing," she says quickly, wiping her eyes, "I'm just really proud of how responsible you're being about this. It just makes me a little sad that you're so grown up."

"Mom," I say sadly, I push my books to the side and stand to give her a hug. Her arms go around my shoulders, "I really am proud of you Bean, it's just hard to watch you grow up so fast. Next thing you know you're gonna be moving out and getting married." She's silent for a moment and then exclaims, "Oh god. Please don't get married to Conrad until you're at least in your 20's."

I suck a breath in between my teeth, pulling back slightly, "We didn't tell you? Conrad and I are getting married when I graduate. Maybe do a double ceremony right there in the gym."

"Don't even joke about that, Isabel Susannah," she brushes her tears away more and I can see the seriousness on her face. 

"Lighten up mom, I promise no marriage until after college. We haven't even talked about it, we've only been dating for a month and a half."

"Good, I'm glad to hear that. Now go back to your homework or you won't be graduating if you don't pass Trig." 

I roll my eyes and head back to my pile of textbooks, "Don't worry, my trig tutor won't let that happen."

"He better not if he wants to keep seeing you. The minute your grades dip, your Conrad time dwindles. He can hang with your brother instead," she says smirking. "And if that happens you won't ever get him back," she teases. I glare at her slightly as she closes my bedroom door behind her. 

I hear her feet hitting the stairs as she descends them and the second she hits the last step I'm grabbing my phone to call Conrad. When he answers it sounds weird, not static but more of a whooshing sound, "Are you heading back to school?"

"Yeah, I left like twenty minutes ago although I wish I had left sooner."

"Why? I thought you wanted to spend more time with your mom?"

"I did," he says, "Until she started giving me the sex talk."

A giggle escapes my lips and I try to cover it with an, "Awwww." Another giggle escapes, "Poor Connie," I say in a teasing tone.

"Just wait, they're gonna get you somehow," he says in a mock threat.

"Oh they already did. It's why I'm calling you, my mom asked if I wanted to ditch school Friday-"

"Laurel asked if you wanted to skip school?" He asks in disbelief. "Are we sure it's Laurel and not a robot?"

"She's not a robot you nerd," I can hear him chuckle on the other end but I continue, "She says Susannah wants me to come down and we can go to tea like when I was little. It's a trap Connie. They're gonna give me the talk. For the fourth time!" I exclaim quietly, my mum has ears like a bat.

"They just want to really ingrain it into our brains that we are not to give them any grandkids," he jokes. My heart stutters at the thought of Conrad and I in the far off future with a baby. 

I shake my head of those thoughts, I can't let myself dream like that it's still early, "Yeah they've made that pretty clear." I want to get off this topic as fast as possible,  "So, since moms want to be sneaky I was thinking we could be too."

"Oh? What did you have in mind?" I can practically hear the smirk in his voice.

"I was thinking, you could spontaneously come home Thursday night," I shrug my shoulders innocently even though he can't see me. 

"I can't come home Thursday, I have a lab Friday morning," my shoulders fall. 

"Oh okay that's fine-"

"But I can be there Friday night. I'll take you out on a date in the city. How does that sound?"

"It sounds perfect." I can hear him let out a small chuckle on the other end. "What's so funny?" I ask. 

"Nothing, just after this little stunt we tend to pull they're never gonna let us be alone again." 

He's right, I'm surprised mom hasn't already put restrictions in place after I asked her to go on birth control. "I guess that just means we'll have to be sneakier."

"I guess it does."

Our words hang out in the universe, a dopey grin on my face, he can't see me but I still try and stifle it. "So um, I'm having some trouble with this Trig problem, do you think you can help me?"

"Lay it on me, Conklin," he says. I jump into explaining the problem to him before listening to him go through the steps on how to solve it.

Chapter Text

The next day mom and I went to see Dr. Covey, he's been my moms doctor since she got pregnant with Steven, he delivered both of us and has quite literally known me my entire life. He goes over all of my options and I do end up going with the pill. My mom sat there silently as I chose, only offering her opinion when I looked to her. Some may see these as being rude or her not approving but to my mom it's her way of telling me she trusts me, she’s treating me like an adult. 

At the end of the appointment Dr. Covey handed me my prescription and a 'goody bag' full of condoms and a joke about not wanting to see me in his delivery room anytime soon. I wanted the floor to open up and swallow me whole. 

When I got home I rushed up the stairs with my new prescription and goody bag before Steven  could ask what was in the bag. I hid them in my nightstand because again, nosey brother.

He has asked every day this week why I get to go to Boston two weekends in a row and get to skip school while he can't. Mom got so sick of it she threatened to ground him if he asked again. 

Mom picks me up two hours early from school on Thursday and we head towards Boston. I do my homework for most of the drive until we get to Connecticut and Mom switches with me at a rest stop, saying I need the practice and she needs a break. 

"Susannah's appointment is at eight at BMC, they typically last around two hours. Do you want to come downtown with us? Or do you want to stay at the house? I bet I could persuade Susannah to let Jeremiah stay home from school," she says enticingly. 

I shift in my seat as I put my blinker on to get into the middle lane, looking over my shoulder so I can avoid my moms gaze, "I don't think Jere wants to hang out with me."

I look back at the road and merge. I can see my mom out of the corner of my eye shake her head with a sigh, "You need to talk to him, avoiding him does nothing."

"I'm not the one doing the avoiding. He won't talk to me. He won't answer my texts or calls. I hate that everyone is blaming this on me," it's been like this since we got home. Steven blamed me, Jeremiah blamed me, even my mom. 

"I didn't know Bean, you didn't tell me," she says evenly, trying to calm me down.

"You never asked. Everyone just automatically blames me, just like they always do. I'm not Conrad or Steven with their perfect grades and I'm not Jeremiah with his wit. I'm just plain old Belly. I'm sorry that's not enough for you," I spit at her. My mom has nothing to say to that. 

We spend the rest of the car ride in silence.

I park out in front of the Fishers, I take the key out of the ignition and move to grab the door handle  but my mom stops me. "Bean, wait."

I huff and lean back in my seat looking out the windshield at the quiet street in front of me. It's only seven o'clock but it seems like the neighborhood has a curfew or something, not a kid in sight. Cars parked in driveways, curtains pulled but light seeping out from underneath.

"I don't want you to ever think that you are not enough. I love you so much, Belly. Just because you don't have all A's doesn't mean you're not smart and you are just as funny as Jeremiah. You don't ever have to compare yourself to them. I love you just the way you are. You also have something that the boys lack."

I snort, "Oh yeah? What's that?"

Her hand comes up to my chin, turning it so I look her in the eye, "Courage. Do you think the boys would ever come to me or Susannah about birth control? They wouldn't even go to your dad or Adam. The boys may be smart but they are not as emotionally intelligent as you. I mean, your brother is in love with Taylor and he doesn't even realize it. He just follows after her like a little puppy." We both laugh at my brother's obvious crush for my best friend and the fact that he's an idiot.

My mom gets serious again, "You are enough just the way you are, I don't want you to think anything differently."

I nod slightly and she smiles at me. "I love you, mom."

"I love you too, Bean," she pulls me into a hug and presses a kiss to the side of my head. After a moment she releases me, "Come on. Susannahs probably waiting by the door for us." I chuckle at that and get out of the car grabbing my bag from the backseat. 

As we are walking up to the house the door flies open and Susannah rushes out pulling me into a tight hug. I've always loved her hugs, a hug from Susannah is like being hugged by the sun. It's warm and it consumes you. She makes you feel like everything is okay with just a simple hug. "Hi sweet girl. I'm so excited you're here. I got you a dress for the tea tomorrow-"

"Beck you didn't have to do that," my mom says with a shake of her head. 

"I wanted to. And I got you one too." She turns to me with a twinkle in her eye, "I thought we could all wear these crazy hats, pretend we're British."

I let out a laugh because it's such a Susannah thing to do. When I was eight she had us all pretend like we were French when we went to get Crepes at this new place in Cousins. My French has vastly improved since then when the only word I know was 'bonjour'. "It sounds great Susannah." She grins and ushers us into the house. 

"Have you guys eaten?" She asks shutting the door behind us. 

"No not yet, you wanna order out?" My mom asks. 

"I did it already. I knew you wouldn't eat without me," Susannah says making my mom roll her eyes. "I ordered Chinese. Belly's favorite. It should be ready soon, Belly do you want to come with?"

"Uh, actually do you mind if I stay here? I want to finish up some homework before tomorrow," I tell them. What I don't tell them is it's because Conrad is coming home and I want to spend as much time as possible with him.

"Of course, your room is set up if you-" she's cut off by the door opening, Jere walking in with his gym bag on his shoulder. He stops in his tracks when he spots me. His bag slowly slipping off his shoulders.  "Oh good, you're home," Susannah says to her son. "Laurel and I are gonna go get dinner. You can keep Belly company. Maybe help her with her homework if she needs any." Doubt that, his grades are as bad as mine. Mom snatches the keys out of my hand and they're out the door before Jere or I can even react. 

The door closes shut behind them and the room is bathed in awkward silence. We stand there for a few moments not looking at each other. Just as I start to say his name does he speak, "Jere-"

"I'm gonna go take a shower," and he moves to walk past me to get upstairs. 

My frustration flares and I turn on him grabbing his arm so he can't move, "No you're gonna stay here and we're gonna talk."

I can see the anger burning in his eyes, "Talk about what? How happy you are with Conrad?"

"Leave him out of this. This about you and me. I'm sick of this Jere. You are supposed to be my best friend and you haven't talked to me in months."

"You shouldn't care, you're with Conrad now," he spits at me. 

"I said leave him out of it," I say, my voice getting louder. "I still need my best friend. That's what you are. I'm sorry for how things went but I am not sorry for being with Conrad. I-"

"Good then go be with him," he waves me off trying to take his arm out of my grip but I hold tighter. 

"SHUT UP," I shout. His eyes go wide, I am not one to yell or lose my temper. It's only happened a few times in the past sixteen years. I take a deep breath trying to compose myself. 

"You don't get to make me feel bad about being with the person I love. Cause I do love him Jeremiah. But I love you too. Just not in the way you want and you can't make me feel guilty about that! I won't let you anymore. You tried it on Thanksgiving and I let it go but not anymore."

"Good. Great," his nostrils flare with anger, "Can I go now?"

"No I'm not done. You don't get to be mad. You know I've been in love with Conrad since I was ten years old. I know that you tried convincing Nicole to get Conrad away so you could get me alone. You did a lot of sketchy shit Jere. I could've handled it better but you could've too." I sigh heavily, "I'm sorry for how things happened Jere. I'm sorry for hurting you. Please just talk to me. I need my best friend back, please Jere," I beg with him my voice cracking. 

He just stares at me with a blank look on his face but his eyes give him away."Belly," he says softly. "I-I don't want to be mad at you anymore. I just need time."

"You've already had four months Jere. Please, with everything going on..." our eyes connect remembering the huge elephant in our lives. The cancer. The one thing the adults won't talk to us about. "We need each other. You and Conrad need each other, you're brothers." His face crumbles, tears begin to fall and I pull him into a hug, my arms going around his waist. "I-I'm so scared, Belly. It-it doesn't f-feel like last time. I can't lose her. I can't lose my mom." I can't tell him that he won't, she may very well die and I'm terrified. So I tell him. 

"I'm scared too, Jere," I choke out, tears gathering in my eyes. "But you have me, you have Conrad. You have Steven and my mom. We're here for you. I promise. I'll always be here for you." He hugs me tighter, his tears making a wet spot on my shoulder. 

"I love you Bells," he sobs into my ear. 

"I love you too, Jere. You're my best friend," I say into his shoulder, being crushed into it from the force of his hug.

"You're mine. God, I've missed talking to you. Things have been so weird the past few months. Dad has been trying to be around more but is failing and mom is so tired all the time or at appointments. I haven't been able to talk to anyone about it," Jere vents. 

"I'm here now. You can call me whenever it's what best friends are for." He hugs me tighter in response almost restricting my breathing. 

We don't let go of each other until our tears have subsided. We laugh pathetically as we wipe our tears away. "I'm um gonna go put my bag in my room and finish my homework," I tell him, grabbing my bag from the floor where I dropped it during our hug. 

"Yeah, okay," he says nodding, grabbing his gym bag. "I'm gonna take a shower." We head up the stairs parting at the top, I go left while he goes right.

As I take my laptop out of my bag I smile softly to myself, "I have my best friend back," I whisper happily. It's been hell the past few months not talking to Jeremiah. Fighting with him is never fun, we rarely fought growing up other than him and Steven leaving me out. We talked sporadically throughout the school year once we got phones, no more than two weeks going by without a meme or an 'I miss you' text being sent or making plans for the summer when inspiration hit. And our birthday texts were always long winded, detailing how much we missed each other and why we were the others best friend. But this year all I did was text him 'Happy Birthday Jere!' And I got no response back. Things are finally moving in the right direction for us and I hope it stays that way.

At the end of dinner Jere looks at me from across the table with a small smile on his face, "Belly, I got the new Mario Kart, you want to play? I bet I can totally kick your ass," his eyes twinkling with mischief. 

"Puh-lease, you're gonna be crying by the time I'm done with you," I shoot back, already gathering my plate to put in the sink. My mom raises her eyebrow at the obvious difference in me and Jere's attitudes towards each other. I smile and shrug my shoulder at her.

Jere and I play a few rounds of Mario Kart until the moms come in and suggest a movie. My mom makes popcorn and Jere makes us brownies as Susannah is tired. They put on Casablanca and I cuddle up in between them just like every movie night we've ever had in Cousins. 

Chapter Text

After the movie we all head up to bed, Jere offering to get breakfast with me while moms are at the doctor. 

I can't keep the grin off my face as I put my pajamas on and climb into bed. I grab my phone from the nightstand and FaceTime Conrad. His face pops up, a smile painted across it, "Hey," he says softly. 

"Hi, where are you?" I ask, noticing the bright lights and white walls and glass windows behind him. 

"In a study room, Trying to figure out this problem for O-Chem but it's currently frying my brain," he drops his pen onto the desk leaning back in his seat in frustration. 

"I'm sorry, I'll let you go," I tell him, not wanting to take him away from his studies. 

"No, no," he says hurriedly, "I need a break or I'm gonna go crazy." His face flushes, "Besides, I've missed you. We haven't really had a chance to talk much this week. Are you at the house?" 

"Yeah, we got here at six-thirty. I ate dinner with the moms and Jere, then we all watched a movie together."

"What movie?"

"Casablanca."

"Ahhh a Belly classic," he hums, I've made the boys watch that movie a million times since we were kids. “How did your speech go in French?" He asks changing the subject. 

"It was good, I got a ninety-eight. My teacher told me my pronunciation was perfect."

"Tres magnifique," he says in a horrible French accent making me giggle. 

"Wow, that was..." I struggle to find a word so as not to be rude.

"Amazing?" He supplies. 

"Different," I settled on. 

Conrad rolls his eyes, "Sue me, I took Italian." And he speaks it well. I swear, the first time I heard him say something in Italian I almost kissed him right then and there.

"You won't hear me complaining," I say cheekily. He throws his head back in laughter making my heart flutter. “So, did you plan our date yet?” I ask quirking an eyebrow at him. 

He slaps his forehead playfully, sarcastically saying, “Oh I knew I was forgetting something.”

I roll my eyes at him, “You never know. So what are we doing?”

He shakes his head, “Nope, you’re just gonna have to find out tomorrow. I’ll be home around three.”

“Alright, I should be back around four unless I die from embarrassment with the moms.”

“You’ll be fine. Now, how’s volleyball going?” I tell him all about our preseason games and that the team is looking strong. We move from topic to topic, never running out of things to say. It’s only when I yawn that Conrad suggests we hang up. “No, no I’m fine. Just keep talking. I like listening to your voice.” A small smile graces his lips but he continues to tell me about the party that Trusky threw in their room. 

I wake up the next morning to our facetime call having ended and a text from Conrad, I’ll see you tomorrow x.o. P.S. I got proof that you snore this time. Then there’s a screen recording of me snoring softly. My cheeks heat up in embarrassment. 

I text him back, Those aren’t snores. Those are exhales. 

Instantly he texts back, They’re snores and they’re adorable. I send him an eye rolling emoji back. I check how long our phone call lasted, five hours and thirty six minutes. He stayed on even after I fell asleep. A huge smile makes its way to my face, he didn’t hang up on me until he absolutely had to. 

The smile stays with me as I get ready for breakfast with Jeremiah. He knocks on my door as I run a brush through my hair, I open it to see him dressed for the day, “You ready?” He asks. 

“Yeah, let me get a coat,” I rush to the chair I put it on last night, grabbing it. I make sure my part is straight and then we’re off. Jeremiah drives us into Southie where we go to this place called Petula’s. It’s adorable inside, it doesn’t have much overhead lighting allowing the natural light to seep in and light it up. We’re seated at a table along the back wall, I sit on the booth side while Jere sits on the chair. 

We don’t talk as we pick out what we are gonna get. Jeremiah gets avocado toast making me scrunch up my nose and I of course get the pancakes. Once our waitress takes our order we jump right into catching each other up on everything the other has missed in the past four months. I tell him about Taylor and her boyfriend Miles and volleyball and he tells me about football and friends. 

“I heard you won homecoming king,” I tell him, deciding not to bring up Conrad just yet unsure of where we stand on the subject. 

“Yep, me and Blake. We danced to the titanic song. All I could think of as it was playing was that TikTok sound where it's off key. We just kept laughing, could barely finish the dance.”

“Please tell me you sang it off key to him,” I beg, crying laughing. 

Jere nods, wiping his own tears away, “Yeah at first. But Blake told me to stop because we needed some good pictures at least.”

“Soo are you two dating?” I ask teasingly. 

A blush makes its way onto his cheeks, “Uh no. I think he wants to but I just… don’t know,” he finishes off unsteadily. 

Guilt forms in my stomach, is he not going into it because of me? Is he hung up on me? Before I can ask him the waitress brings out our food. I grab the syrup and proceed to pour it all over my breakfast. 

He laughs softly, “Conrad would crashout if he saw all the syrup you put on those pancakes.”

Without thinking I say, “I have my ways of calming him down.” I freeze immediately. I slowly set the syrup down on the table and stare at my plate. “Jere I-”

“No, no, I’d love to know what these methods are,” I look up when I hear the playfulness in his tone. He’s wearing that casual smirk of his, the one he’s always used to tease me. 

“Y-you’re okay talking about this?” I ask him. “Me and Conrad?”

Jeremiah shrugs, “I’m not mad anymore. I was being an idiot, Belly. I should have known. I mean I did know. I saw you two on the Four-” He stops talking abruptly like he’s revealed a secret. 

My eyes narrow, “You saw us, when. ” 

He looks down at his breakfast, he’s trying to think of a lie. “Don’t you dare lie to me Jeremiah.”

He looks up at me with a regretful look, “I saw you two on the dock. I shot the firework at you two to stop you from kissing.”

A murderous glare takes over my face. “You-you almost killed us!” I whisper harshly. “You almost killed me and your brother all because he was going to kiss me? You are fucking crazy Jeremiah! And you had the fucking audacity to be mad at me when we did eventually kiss? You haven’t talked to me in months! You’ve made me feel awful for months, like I was the bad guy. I can not believe you,” I whisper yell at him. 

I start to get up, not wanting to be around him for another second but he grabs my hand desperately pleading with me, “Belly please, don’t go. I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have done it. I don’t know what came over me, I just got so angry. And you’re right. I knew. I knew that you had liked Conrad when I pursued you. I just thought that maybe you would forget about him if you knew i liked you. I should’ve known though, nothing can come between you two.” He has the decency to look ashamed. “Can you forgive me?”

I want to be mad at him, stay mad at him like he did to me but it’s not who I am, “Yeah. But don’t you ever do anything like that again or I will tell Susannah and Laurel. ” 

The threat puts fear into him and he nods quickly, “Y-yes I promise just don’t tell them!”

“I won’t.” I start to dig into my pancakes, stuffing it into my mouth. That’s when Jeremiah decides to ask, “So what are these ways you have to calm my brother down?” He raises his eyebrows in a playful manner, smirking at me. 

I choke on my pancake, stunned at the question. I grab my water, take a drink, and try to force my food down. Jeremiah continues, “Have you two had sex yet?” 

I finally get the pancakes all the way down my esophagus, breathing hard. I look around but the place is pretty empty for ten on a Friday. “No we haven’t, not that it's any of your business.”

His eyebrows go up in surprise, “You two haven’t done it yet?!” He asks, shocked. I shake my head no, bringing another-smaller-bite of pancakes to my mouth. “But you’ve been dating for like two months!”

“Not everyone is as sexed up as you Jeremiah.”

He gasps, putting a hand to his heart in–mock–astonishment, “Are you calling me a man whore Bells?”

I shrug, “If the shoe fits.”

He lifted his eyebrow, a challenge in his eye, “Wow, okay. It’s like that?” I stare back at him unwaveringly. He laughs sardonically, “I hope he gets you pregnant.”

I gasp and point my fork at him, “You take that back Jeremiah Fisher!” 

“Never,” he says, smiling smugly. 

“I hope you get herpes,” I shot back. 

“I hope you get chlamydia,” he says. 

“I hope your hair falls out!” Yes, get him where it hurts!

A look of betrayal washes across his face, “Too far Bells. Too far.”

“You started it!”

“I take it back. I take it all back! Now you take it back!” He pleads with his hands coming up to his hair to make sure it’s still there.

I roll my eyes at him, “Fine I take it all back.”

He breathes out a sigh of relief, “Thank you.”

“There’s no one quite as vain as you, Jere,” I laugh. 

A smug smirk makes its way onto his face, “No one looks quite as good as me Bells.” And just like that we’re best friends again. It’s like no time has passed, we spend the rest of breakfast teasing each other and catching one another up on our lives. It feels good to have my friend back. 

When we get back to the house my mom and Susannah are already there. My mom is in the dress that Susannah picked out for her, a black tea length dress with white flowers on it and a white hat on her lap. She’s sitting on the couch looking at her watch, looking up when we walk in, “We have to leave in twenty minutes Bean! Go get ready.”

“Okay, okay,” I say in a huff. I rush upstairs chucking off my jeans and sweater and tugging the dress on. It’s a white tiered maxi dress with a sweetheart neckline, puffed sleeves and blue flowers on it. It falls against my body just right and despite my tan having been long gone almost makes me glow. I can’t admire myself in the mirror too long as my mom yells up to me, “ WE’RE GONNA BE LATE ISABEL.” I roll my eyes and grab the heels Susannah picked out and the hat and rush down the stairs. I wait until the bottom to put my heels on, when I straighten up Susannah makes me spin for her, “Oh you look so beautiful sweetheart. A vision in white just like at the Deb Ball.”

My face burns, “Thanks Susannah.” She smiles and then we’re ushered out the door by my mom. 

She drives us to the Tea Room, it’s right on the water. We’re seated at this round table with high back chairs towards the back of the restaurant in front of the floor to ceiling windows. The table has white linen tablecloths and the most beautiful fine china with dainty flowers painted on it.  

Mom and Susannah reminisce on all the times they used to take me here when I was little and the one time they tried to take the boys with us. Jere dropped the tea pot, Steven spit out the tea and Conrad read a book the entire time. They never went again. It was just us girls. 

Once the waiter has poured us some tea and set the scones down and made his way back to the kitchen the moms share a look. Susannah nods and looks at me, saying, “So, Belly, sweetheart, we wanted to talk to you about something.”

Oh God. A pit forms in my stomach. They know. They know what Conrad and I did. 

“Bean you and Conrad have been dating for a little over a month and after what we saw on Thanksgiving-”

“What did you see on Thanksgiving?” I shriek. Both women’s heads cock to the side, their faces scrutinizing me. My mom leans in and asks me in a low voice, “What do you think we saw?”

I avert my eyes as I feel a blush spreading to my cheeks, “I-I don’t know.”

“Honey, Adam told me that he caught you two coming out of his room. Did you two, um… do anything?” Susannah asks hesitantly.

“We were just kissing, that’s it,” I say earnestly, my eyes darting between them. 

“And on the couch that night?” My mom asks. 

“Yes, all we did was kiss,” I insist. 

Susannah leans in, “And nothing happened after everyone went to bed?”

I bring a scone to my lips biting into it so I don’t have to answer. “Bean…” I place the scone down and take a sip of tea hoping to find someway out of this. I place the teacup down delicately, “We um, we slept together.”

Silence blankets the table then chaos ensues. “Why did you lie when you told me you didn’t have sex? You know you can tell me anything, Belly,” my mom insists.

Oh, oh no. “Mom-”

“Did you use protection?” Susannah asks earnestly. Oh god. 

“No we didn’t!” I exclaim without thinking. 

My moms face turns a bright shade of red, “You didn’t use protection? You weren’t on birth control Isabel. You could be pregnant! It’s too late for a Plan B. How could you do this?”

“Mom-” I try but she cuts me off. 

“Did you two plan this? DId you do it on purpose? You are sixteen Isabel. You can’t get pregnant,” she says frantically, her face turning white at the thought. 

I can’t even respond as Susannah cuts in, “I’m gonna kill my son. How could he get you pregnant?” She grabs my moms hand tightly, gasping, “Laur, we can’t be grandmothers. We’re not even fifty! I thought we had another ten years until this happened. And I certainly didn’t expect it to be Conrad who would make me a grandmother too early. I love Jeremiah but I always thought it would be him.” Oh I am so telling Jeremiah.

“Susannah, I’m not pregnant,” I insist. 

“You don’t know that Belly,” my mum replies. Well, unless I’m the next virgin Mary it’s not possible. 

Now they’re both spiraling, Susannah frantically says, “It’s still too early to test. Or is it? I don’t know how far pregnancy tests have come. I haven’t taken one since I had Jeremiah. I mean I had that one scare a few years back but I got a blood test instead.” She turns to my mom, gesturing to her, “You remember. It happened after that charity gala Adam and I went to, we got a little too drunk on champagne and ended up doing it in the bathroom at the hotel.”

I quickly cover my ears not wanting to hear this. My mom reaches over, grabbing my hands and forcefully tugging them down. “Stop it Susannah, you’re gonna traumatize her. Belly this is serious. You can’t be stupid about this.”

“I’m not! I’m not pregnant, we didn’t have sex. That’s what I’ve been trying to tell you. We slept together as in, we slept in the same bed. But nothing happened I promise. We fell asleep and that’s it. I came to you wanting to go on birth control. I took the initiative. I am being an adult about this mom.”

The moms are silent for a few seconds as the process the information. “You… slept in the same bed?” My mom asks. 

“Yes,” I say sheepishly. 

Susannah leans in searching my face for a lie, “And nothing happened?” 

I school my features giving nothing away, “No. Nothing happened. We kissed and then we fell asleep. I came to you mom. I came to you and asked to go on birth control. I am being an adult about this. I know not to be stupid.“

I can see both of their shoulders fall with relief. “Okay,” my mom says, breaking the silence. “I don’t care that you two slept in the same bed. That’s fine.”

“Wait really?” I ask hopefully. I imagine falling asleep next to Conrad every night that he comes down to Chesterbrook and my heart flutters and the butterflies in my stomach become a swarm. 

“I’d prefer you didn’t but you’ve already done it behind my back. There’s no stopping you unless I sleep outside your room when he stays over. So yes but there’s going to be rules.” Of course, my mom had a rule for everything. This should be no different. “From now on the door is to remain open during the day and you are to keep it unlocked at night. These rules are always subject to change. And we will revisit them when the summer comes. You two won’t have free reign to do whatever you want just because you’re living under the same roof.” I can’t wait for that day. I have a feeling this summer is going to be perfect. 

“I’m really glad that you are being proactive about birth control, Belly,” Susannah says, “But we still need to have a little refresher on safe sex, okay?”

“Do we have to do this here?” I whisper harshly, looking around the room. No one’s near us but it’s still public. 

They share a look and look back at me, “Yes,” they say in unison. I roll my eyes and lean back in my chair awaiting their assault of information I’ve heard a million times since I got my period at twelve years old. 

Mom starts first, “Just because you are on birth control does not mean you shouldn’t use condoms. It’s better to be extra safe, the pill can fail.”

“And remember if you take antibiotics they basically cancel out your pill and it takes a few days for the pill to kick in again,” Susannah adds.

“I know all of this, you guys,” I insist. 

They ignore me–as always of course. “Now onto consent. No means no. No matter what. That goes for both genders. If something feels wrong or off you have every right to say no.”

“Mom, Conrad wouldn’t do anything I didn’t want.” He’s not the type. He still asks my permission to kiss me for christsake. 

I know Bean but this goes for any relationship. I just want you to know all the facts.”

“I do mom. I promise if anything happens it will be safe and consensual. Now can we please stop this?” I beg. They finally relent and move on to different topics, Susannah is already asking about prom, if Conrad’s asked me yet, if I got my dress or thought about my hair. Prom is four months away. 

My mom does eventually get her off that topic and the rest of the tea goes by without any fanfare. It feels like I’m a kid again, Susannah does make us pretend we’re british and the waiter tries and fails to stifle his laughter at the ridiculousness of it. We pick at the finger sandwiches and devour the scones and small tea cakes and drink loads of tea. It’s perfect. I’ve missed times like these, it reminds me that we’re getting older. These teas will become more and more rare. I just hope one day I get to take my daughter here with both of her grandmother’s. 

I sit in the back of my moms car with my stomach full of hot tea and small cakes, drifting in and out of consciousness. I must have drifted off when I’m startled awake by the car being put into park. I look out the window and there it is. Conrad’s Range Rover parked in front of the house. 

“Belly, did you tell Conrad that you were gonna be here?” Susannah asks with a knowing smile. 

“No, of course not,” I say, my face a picture of innocence. My mom stares into my soul from the rearview mirror but I ignore it and climb out of the car, excited to see my boyfriend. 

I open the door and there he is. My boyfriend. Conrad Beck Fisher. 

Chapter Text

I open the door and there he is, at the bottom of the stairs in an intense conversation with Adam. “Stop lying Conrad Beck!” Adam shouts. 

“I’m not lying,” Conrad yells back. 

“Woah woah, what the hell is going on here?” Susannah yells over the both of them. 

“Our son is lying to me,” Adam fumes, the younger Fisher just rolls his eyes.

“What is he lying about?” Susannah asks, although she already has an idea. 

“I asked him if he knew Belly was here this weekend, he said he had no idea. I know he’s lying.”

“I’m not, we haven’t talked much this week. It’s getting close to finals,” Conrad explains. 

I jump in adding, “He’s not lying. My teachers have been piling on the work the past week and I figured this would just be a girls weekend. I didn’t tell him.” Conrad looks at me with a secret smile, I can hear him in my head, ‘Lies, lies, lies, Isabel.’

All three adults stare at us in silence trying to find out if we’re lying but we don’t budge. Eventually Adam relents, “Fine,” he grumbles out.

“Why is it a big deal anyway? Do you not want us under the same roof for some reason?” Conrad challenges. Adam opens his mouth but flounders for a response, so his son continues on, “I mean we’re gonna be under the same roof come June. Should I start looking for a place to live now?”

“Don’t be a wiseass Connie,” Laurel says, although I can tell she’s trying to hold in a laugh. 

“Well, since my girlfriend is here, can I take her out on a date?” He asks smiling at me. He keeps teasing me with this date, not telling me the details on what he has planned. 

Adam scoffs, “I thought you were busy,” he challenges. 

“I am but I can spare a few hours to take her out on a date,” he’s trying not to let his smugness show but is failing miserably. 

“Yes you can,” My mom says with a wry smile, clearly knowing we planned this. “But don’t stay out too late.”

“What’s too late?” I ask. 

She rolls her eyes playfully, “I’ll leave that to your discretion but don’t push it Belly. I’m giving you two a chance to show me you’re responsible. This is a test run for when you are living under the same roof this summer. Don’t ruin it.”

I grin and rush to give her a hug, knocking her slightly off balance, “Thank you, thank you thank you!” I exclaim excitedly. I release her and look back at Conrad, “Let me get changed and I’ll be right down.” He nods and I shoot up the stairs. 

I struggle to get out of my dress at first, the zipper too high for me to reach. Suddenly there’s a knock on the door, I open it and standing there is Conrad with a wry smile on is face, “I figured you’d need help with the zipper.”

“Oh?” I smirked. “And you thought you’d be the best man for the job? Not my mom or Susannah?”

“Nah, definitely not. My hands are stronger, better for stubborn zippers,” he steps forward backing me into the room. I know that if I told him no, to go get one of the moms he would but I don’t want them. I want him.

He shuts the door behind him and I turn around, moving my hair over to one shoulder. I take a deep breath in to try and steady my breathing when I feel his hand against the fabric of the dress. He pulls it down slowly, his knuckle skims my skin slowly sending a shiver down my back. “You okay?” He asks, his breath wafting over my neck. 

I turn around in his arms and pull him into a kiss. His hands go to my back, touching my heated skin and pulling me closer. 

My hands are in his hair, intertwining with locks keeping him close. It’s only been a week since we last saw each other but I’ve missed him. 

His tongue tangles with mine in a well rehearsed dance. It feels like my entire body is on fire as he kisses me. I want more. I need more. 

My hands go to the bottom of his shirt, touching the skin peeking out above his jeans. I can feel his hands skim my back going to the open sides of my dress and starting to slowly pull it down. 

Once the fabric is just past my clavicle his lips attach to my neck and a sigh makes its way past my lips. “Conrad,” I say breathily. He lowers his head and nips at my chest. My breath hitches, my hands go back to his hair pulling him closer. Needing more, more, more, more. 

He pulls my dress down even more, the tops of my breasts bared to the cold air of the room. Suddenly there’s a knock on the door. My heart stops, no no no no. Fuck. Conrad pushes the dress back up my arms quickly, “Shit,” he whispers against my lips, a groan falling from his lips at having been interrupted and possibly caught. 

Another knock comes as I turn around and he zips my dress back up. Moms are gonna kill us. I promised them we’d keep the door open and I’ve already broken it not even five minutes after seeing him. 

Another knock, “I know you’re in there Conrad, you guys aren’t slick,” Jeres voice carries. 

I breathe a sigh of relief, Conrad raises his eyebrow at me. I move past him and open the door to find Jeremiah on the other side smirking. “What’s up?” I ask nonchalantly. 

“Nothing, just wondering what you guys are doing,” he says with a lilt in his voice. 

“Just talking.”

“Oh really?” He asks raising his eyebrow. “That’s why Conrad’s hair is messed up and your lips are swollen?”

“You better keep your mouth shut Jere. Or I’ll tell moms about what you wished upon me at breakfast this morning,” I threaten. 

“I took that back! You can’t tattle when I took it back!” He whines. 

“Too bad. I’ll do it,” he glares at me as he walks away to his room. 

I shut the door and turn back to Conrad who has one eyebrow cocked, looking at me questioningly. “What?” I ask.

“What did he wish upon you?” He asks. 

I blush and look away, “Oh, um. Well it doesn’t matter.”

He moves across the room, cutting the distance between us. His hands settle on my waist, gripping them softly in his hands, “Belly, tell me what he said. Please.” His face is littered with worry probably thinking Jere and I got into another fight. 

My hands settled onto his shoulders thumbing the fabric of his shirt, “He wasn’t being rude, it was more of us just joking Connie.”

“Then tell me,” he insists. 

“You are infuriating,” I say jokingly. He doesn’t laugh, he just stares at me waiting for me to spill. I throw my head back in frustration, “Ugh, fine.” I don’t look him in the eye, instead I stare at his collarbone, “We were joking around, I called him a man-whore and then he uh said that he hopes you get me pregnant.” I can feel him tense, his hands on my hips tightening their grip. “Ya know bad juju and everything. We then started wishing bad things upon each other, I told him that I hoped all his hair would fall out. We took everything back and laughed about it, so the bad juju is no more,” I say, trying to joke at the end. 

I finally look up at Conrad and he has a wry smile on his face. “What’s going through your mind right now?” I ask him. 

“That I’m glad my brother took it back. And I’m honestly just happy that you two are joking around again.”

“Yeah we talked through everything. He apologized for a lot of things. Oh did you know he’s the one that shot the firework at us?”

“Yeah, he told me he didn’t know we were down there.”

“That was a lie, he did it to stop us from kissing.” His grip on my waist tightens again, his jaw locks and I worry that this will start another fight between the brothers which is the last thing I want right now. But Conrad surprises me, he lets out a deep sigh and the tension is released from his body and his grip loosens on my waist. “You okay?” I ask. 

“Yeah, fine. Just sick of the games but we’re starting over. You two are good again and  you forgave him, that’s all that matters. Now, come on. We have a reservation we need to get to.”

“A reservation?” I ask. “I thought you had no idea that I was coming here,” I say jokingly. He lets out a laugh and brings his hands to my zipper once again. “Do you really think that’s wise?” I whisper, my breath mixing with his with each exhale from how close we are. 

“Yes, because once this zipper is down I am out that door.”

“Then don’t unzip it just yet,” I whisper and crash my lips to his. My hands tangle in his hair pushing him impossibly closer to me.

“Belly,” he says against my lips. “I have to go downstairs.”

“Why?” I ask whining.

“Because if you continue to kiss me like that we are going to miss our reservation.” I drop my head to his chest and let out a groan. He laughs and presses a kiss to my head, the he unzips my dress and is gone fast as lightning. Like if he stayed one more second he would’ve done something very un-Conrad like. 

I change into a tight white scoop neck sweater and a black mini skirt with tights and black boots that Taylor lent me. I pull my hair back into a half up ponytail and grab my coat. I look at myself in the mirror one last time, fixing the chain on my necklace before heading downstairs. 

Conrad is waiting for me at the bottom, he’s changed too. He’s wearing a blue sweater with khakis and his eyes look even more blue than usual. I stop on the bottom step and bite my lip nervously, “How do I look?” I ask. 

He sucks in a breath, his eyes roaming over me. “You look beautiful.” I can feel my cheeks heating up and he walks closer pulling me into a quick kiss. “Let’s go. He grabs my hand about to lead me out of the house when we hear Susannah yell for us to wait. “Hold on you two! I want a picture!”

Conrad and I look at each other rolling our eyes. “Mom, it’s a date not prom.”

“It’s your first date in Boston, it deserves to be commemorated,” she says and intsructs us to stand together. “Oh perfect,” she says snapping a bunch of photots. “This one’s for the grandkids.”

“Alright, we’re outta here,” Conrad says quickly, he guides me out the door to his car. “My mom has no boundaries, I swear to God.”

I let out a snort, “You’re telling me. At tea she told me about how her and your dad did it in the bathroom of a gala.”

He recoils, his arm dropping from my waist looking at me like I killed his dog, “Why would you tell me that, Isabel? I don’t want that image in my head!”

I giggle and bring him into a short kiss, pulling back just slightly I whisper against his lips, “Don’t worry, I’ll make it up to you tonight.” He groans softly, his hand tightening on my waist. He goes to pull me in further but I pull back out of his hold and walk backwards towards the car with a smirk on my lips. 

“You’re the devil.”

“You love it,” I say with a wink. I turn around and keep heading for the car as he groans behind me. “Come on, we have a reservation to make!”

Conrad drives us into the North End and we get lucky, finding a spot right off of Hanover St. He made us a reservation at this little italian place that has low lighting and candles everywhere. It’s quiet and intimate, somewhere you would go for an anniversary. We get seated at a little round booth so we can sit next to each other. 

At first, I sit a decent amount away not wanting him to think I’m being clingy. But he looks over at me with a twinkle in his eyes and an amused smile on his lips, “Why are you so far away?” I blush and scoot further in until we meet in the middle. Our sides are pressed together and everywhere our bodies meet feels like it’s burning with energy. 

Once we get our drinks–Conrad definitely judged me when I ordered a Shirley Temple with extra cherries–he puts his arm around my waist holding me close to him. He leans in and talks to me in a low tone. The way he looks and talks to me makes me feel like I’m the only girl in the world. Like I’m the only one that matters.  

“How was the tea?” He asks, sipping on his Ginger Ale like an old man. 

“Awkward as hell. They made it very clear that we are not to give them any grandchildren while I’m still in school. Mom and Susannah then proceeded to tell me every gory detail of their birth stories and I have decided I’m never having children.”

Conrad laughs at me, “You’ll change your mind.”

“You listen to Susannah talk about her stitches she got after she had you and then tell me if you want to subject me to that torture.”

He smirks down at me, “Oh so these imaginary children of yours are mine?”

The smile is wiped off my face and my cheeks flush from embarrassment, “I-I didn’t mean it like that. I don’t-“

“Belly I’m kidding. Listen, ignore the moms. I mean listen to them about protection but ignore them about everything else. They’re gonna try and make us feel as uncomfortable as possible. Laurel is going to make as many innuendos as possible and my mom will be planning our future and talking about it every chance she gets. Just focus on us. The only ones who get to decide things for us is you and me. No one else. We decide our future. Okay?”

“Yeah, okay.” 

“Other than hearing their stories it went okay?”

“Um, it was… good,” I say.

He eyes me warily, “That wasn’t very convincing, Isabel.”

I pop a cherry into my mouth chewing on it thoroughly, he watches me waiting patiently until I swallow. “Well, I may have accidentally insinuated that we slept together.”

His eyes blow wide open, “What?”

I nod, “Yeah. And then I may have implied that we didn’t use protection.”

He chokes on his drink, “Wh-?”

“And that you got me pregnant.”

He stares at me in shock, his mouth opening and closing, floundering on what to say. “W-w-why, why would you do that?”

“It was an accident! I didn’t realize what I had implied, then things just spiraled out of control and the next thing I knew they were talking about grandkids and pregnancy tests and Susannah was telling me about her and Adam,” a shiver rolls through my body just thinking about it.

“Okay but you corrected them right? You told them that you’re not pregnant? I’m assuming so since my mom wasn’t crying and Laurel didn’t kill me.”

“Yeah, I fixed it. But they still punished me by giving me the most painful sex talk.”

Conrad averts his eyes, his hand fiddling with the fabric of my skirt. “What’s wrong?” I ask. 

“Nothing. It’s just… my mom mentioned something when she was talking to me.” I look at him expectantly waiting for him to tell me. He sighs and runs a hand through his hair, the front pieces being pushed back before falling effortlessly in his face again.  “She-she told me you were going on birth control.”

“Oh.”

“Why didn’t you tell me?” He looks hurt, like I’ve kept a secret from him and in a way I did. 

“I don’t know, I mean, it happened kind of suddenly. I asked last Saturday night when we got home and I just started them on Tuesday.”

“You know you can tell me anything right? I’m always here Belly, no matter what.”

“I know, I guess… I just didn’t want to change anything between us. Just because I’m on birth control doesn’t mean I’m ready. Not yet at least.”

“Hey,” he says softly, his hand coming to rest on my knee, “This doesn’t change anything. It doesn’t change us. I will wait for you, for however long you need. I don’t expect anything from you, Belly,” his tone is sincere and I fully believe him. 

He’s looking at me so sweetly and the words almost fall out of my mouth but I hold them in. It’s too soon. Instead, I lean in and kiss him slowly. It’s a short kiss considering we’re still in public but it holds all of my feelings, everything I want to tell him. 

He pulls back, his eyes falling to the chain around my neck, his hand going from my cheek to the symbol, “I want to do this right, Belly. I don’t want to screw anything up between us.”

“You won’t. We won’t,” I tell him earnestly. He smiles and gives me another peck on my lips before leaning back in the booth tucking me into his side. 

I feel safe and comfortable with him, like nothing and no one could hurt me and I’m right where I’m supposed to be. 

After dinner he drives us into the Seaport. There's this pop up holiday market called Snowport that I’ve seen all over Tiktok. Conrad rolled his eyes when I asked to go but he still drove us there and paid a fortune for parking. 

It’s like something out of one of Susannah’s hallmark movies, there’s lights strung up around the booths, Christmas music playing over the speakers and people playing games. They even have curling. 

Conrad and I bypass the games, neither of us feeling very competitive right now. We head for the food stalls where he buys me a nine dollar hot chocolate but he doesn’t even blink at the price. He just asks for the biggest one they have with extra whipped cream on top. 

He holds my hand as we walk around, stealing kisses whenever he can and I smile into every one. 

There’s a place where you can get a permanent bracelet and I tug on his hand excitedly. “Can we?” I ask, fluttering my eyelashes at him. 

He chuckles and nods his head leading me to the booth. We look at the different chains and all of the charms they have. We watch these two girls get ones and once they’re done Conrad squeezes my hand, “Do you want to get one?” He asks. 

“Oh no, they’re way too expensive,” I could never ask him to spend that much on me, my moms voice ringing in my ears.

He shakes his head, “Don’t worry about it. Do you want one?”

I bite my lip looking at the chains again, “Yeah.”

“Alright come on,” he says resolutely before guiding me to an open sales woman. “Hi, we'd like to get two bracelets.” She nods and helps us pick out the types of chains we want. I go to pick out the cheapest option but Conrad stops me and tells me to get what I want. I ask the lady for the white gold thin helix chain, “Do you want a charm?” He asks me in a low voice. 

“You pick one out for me,” I tell him. He smiles and looks over them slowly, carefully, meticulously like he does everything else. 

He comes back a few minutes later with two, he holds them up proudly showing them off. He’s picked out the letter C and a sun. My moms words come to my head, ‘For Belly, Conrad is the sun and when the sun comes out the stars disappear.’ I heard her whispering it to Susannah over the phone recently and I’ve never heard anything more true. 

I smirk, “C?”

“For Conrad of course,” he says with a smug smile on his face. I roll my eyes at him but take it from him and hand it to the lady. I ask her to put it on my left wrist just above the charm bracelet Susannah got me when I was twelve. 

The ‘C’ charm and the sun charm dangle perfectly and I hold it up for him to admire, he takes my wrist in hand and brings it to his lips, pressing a kiss to my pulse point. My breathing stutters and my heart skips a beat, Conrad smirks before lowering my wrist. 

“Can I get one as well?” He asks her. She nods hurriedly and he picks the rolo chain and an ‘I’ charm. He has her connect the charm with the bracelet so it doesn’t dangle and has her put it on his left wrist as well. 

He pays without even letting me look at the price and grabs my hand as we walk out. “You didn’t have to do that,” I say quietly. 

“I wanted to, besides I like the idea of you wearing my initial around your wrist,” he says, winking at me. He leans down kissing me quickly before continuing our walk around to look at all the different shops. We end up buying the moms some homemade chocolates and Jeremiah some organic protein powder. 

We’re standing off to the side watching the curling competition when we hear from behind us, “Conrad?” 

We turn around and standing there is a gorgeous girl with bronze colored skin and long thick brown hair. 

“Aubrey,” he says in surprise. 

Aubrey. His ex-girlfriend Aubrey. She’s beautiful. She’s tall and skinny and has the shiniest hair. I instantly feel self conscious in front of her. How did he go from her to me? It’s a huge downgrade. 

“What are you doing here?” He asks. 

She points behind her to where a group of girls are currently waiting in line for one of the many food trucks, “I’m here with some friends. How ‘bout you?”

“I’m on a date. Um Aubrey this is my girlfriend Belly. Belly this is Aubrey,” his tone is stilted, obviously nervous for us to meet.

“Hi,” I wave shyly at her wanting to disappear.

“Hey,” she waves back awkwardly. Neither of us knowing how to act around each other. 

“How’s your mom?” She asks. “I, um, heard about her cancer coming back from my mom.”

“She’s doing good, the treatment she’s doing is working so far.”

I squeeze his waist where my hand is resting, “Hey, it’s gonna continue to work.” He smiles down at me and nods, his hand squeezing my hip right back. 

“Well, um it was nice to see you again. Nice to meet you, Belly,” she says awkwardly then turns and heads back to her friends in line. 

“Soooo, that was Aubrey.”

“Mmmhmm,” he hums. 

“She’s pretty,” I say nonchalantly. 

His eyes dart to mine, staring into them like he’s staring into my soul. “Not as pretty as you.” There he goes again saying things so untrue but I just can’t help but believe him. I stand on my tiptoes pressing a kiss to lips, pulling back just slightly I say, “Let’s go home.” We walk out of the crowd, away from Aubrey and her friends but my mind stays there comparing every little detail between us. 

Chapter Text

Jeremiah is the only one up when we get back, he’s in the living room playing video games with a bag of chips beside him. He pauses the game so he can smirk at us, “How’d the date go you two? You’re back pretty late, don’t ya think.”

“It was great, we had fun.”

“Mmmm, how much fun?” he asks, wiggling his eyebrows. 

“Watch it Jere or I’ll tell mom what you wished upon Belly,” Conrad threatens. 

Jere’s eyes dart between us wide eyed, “You told him that?”

“Of course I did, we don’t keep secrets.”

“You should really watch where you point those fireworks, Jere, you don’t want one to go off and cause burns on your face” he says ominously. “We’re going to bed, see you in the morning.”

“Have fun you two,” he says in a sing-song voice. I flip him off and let Conrad lead me upstairs with a hand on my back. We separate at the top of the stairs, “I’m gonna change and then I’ll be over in a few,” I say, giving him a peck on the lips. There’s no need for me to be secretive since Steven isn’t here.

“See you soon,” he whispers before pulling away to go to his room. 

I shut the door behind me and quickly change into my pajamas. When I told Taylor that Conrad and I were going to be under the same roof again she dragged me to Victoria’s Secret and made me buy an even cuter pair of pajamas than last time. It’s a light pink lace cami with matching satin shorts that have a lace edge. 

I stand in front of the mirror once I’m dressed taking in my form. I can’t help but compare myself to Aubrey. She was beautiful. She had glowy bronze skin while my tan has long faded. Her hair was shiny and curly while mine was dull and straight. She was skinny and petite while my thighs are all muscly from volleyball and my chest is probably twice the size of hers. I can’t help but feel inferior. Why would Conrad be with me when he could have girls as beautiful as Aubrey and Nicole?

I shake those thoughts from my head and push my shoulders back, don’t get in your head Isabel. 

I grab my phone and make my way over to Conrad’s, I open the door to find him standing in front of his dresser taking his shirt off. I watch his back muscles ripple as he throws his shirt in the hamper. How the hell are back muscles so hot? 

I shut and lock the door behind me, I’ll unlock it later before we fall asleep. Conrad turns and smiles at me, his eyes taking me in. “Hi,” he breathes out. 

“Hi.” 

“You, um, ready to go to sleep?” He asks nervously, pointing to the bed. 

I walk over to him and wind my arms around his neck, my nails dragging along his skin, “I was hoping we could do something other than sleep,” I whisper, trying to be seductive. 

He raises his eyebrows at me but I don’t give him time to question me, I take charge pressing my lips to his in a hungry kiss. My hands roam his back feeling the soft skin and hard muscles. Memorizing every dip and curve I can find. I pull him closer to me by his hair, feeling his body against mine. 

I move my hands downward trailing from his neck down his pecs to the hard planes of his stomach, down down down. When I get to the edge of his pajama pants I hook my fingers in them staring to pull them down but Conrad startles and breaks away. “Belly what-?”

“I’m ready. I want to do this,” I whisper before crushing my lips to his. 

He breaks away from me looking at me skeptically, “You said earlier at dinner that you weren’t ready, not yet.”

I look behind him, my eyes connecting with the picture of us dancing together, “I changed my mind.”

“Why? What made you change your mind?” He asks, his eyes burning a hole in the side of my face. 

I shrug, not able to find an answer, “I don’t know, I just did.”

He sighs heavily, “Is this because of Aubrey?”

My eyes whip to his and I glare at him as I push his hands off my waist, “No It's not, I can’t believe you’d even ask me that.” I turn away from him moving across the room. 

“Well what do you expect me to think? One moment you’re saying you’re not ready and then after we see my ex you suddenly are.” I ignore him as the shame and anger burns inside of me. “What happened?”

“She’s beautiful okay!” I practically yell at him. Quieter I say, “She’s beautiful. She’s gorgeous and I’m just plain old Belly. You’ve been with her in a way that you haven't been with me and I’m jealous okay?” I can feel tears threatening to fall but I push them down not wanting to cry in front of him. 

The silence stretches between us as my words settle in the air. FInally Conrad says, “You’re right. You’re just Belly.” 

My heart cracks in two at his words and I can feel a tear fall from my eye making the trek down my cheek, “Well, I’m glad we’re on the same page.” I move for the door but he gently grabs my wrist and pulls me back to him. 

His eyes gaze down at me with an intensity I’ve never seen in them, “I don’t think we are. You’re just Belly. Just the girl I’ve known almost my entire life. Just the girl I’ve seen go through even the most awkward of stages. I’ve seen you with braces and big glasses and skinned knees. I’ve seen you in the prettiest white dress and the biggest t-shirt that’s rumpled from sleep. And I thought you were the most beautiful girl I had ever laid eyes on each and every time.” He steps closer until we’re practically chest to chest, “Yes, Aubrey and I have been together in a way that you and I haven’t but my feelings for her didn’t even hold a candle to my feelings for you. I-,” He hesitates slightly, “I love you, Belly.” My heart stops, my mouth goes dry at his words. Conrad Fisher just told me he loves me and all I can do is stare at him. 

It’s like he doesn’t even realize that he’s just rocked my entire world. His hand comes up to my jaw holding it softly, “You mean everything to me. More than you will ever know, Isabel.”

I just stare at him, unable to form words. The silence stretches between us and my heart starts again but it’s pounding against my chest. Almost like it’s trying to jump out and fall into Conrad’s hands where it belongs. 

“Belly?” He asks and I finally blink. 

“You love me?” I ask dumbfounded. 

He chuckles at my question, like he hasn’t already made it abundantly clear. “Yeah Belly. I love you.”

I give him a cheeky grin, “Now ask me if I love you.”

He rolls his eyes playfully, “I think I know the answer already, Isabel.”

“No you don’t,” I sing. “You won’t know until you ask me. So ask me Conrad.”

He laughs softly but soon turns serious again, “Do you love me, Belly?”

I tap my chin in mock thoughtfulness, “Hmmmm,” I hum. “I don’t know. You have to let me think about that for a moment.” I let him stew for a moment more before surging forward and kissing him until we’re both breathless. 

I pull back just slightly until my lips brush his with every word, “Yes. I love you Conrad. I can’t believe you even had to ask me that.”

“You’re such an idiot,” he jokes. 

“Me?! You’re the one who turned me down. Most guys would jump at the chance if their girlfriend of almost two months said they wanted to have sex,” I point out jokingly. 

Conrad doesn’t think it’s funny, he turns serious like he always does whenever this topic comes up. “You know I’m not like most guys, Belly. I don’t want to rush anything between us. I want to take our time. And I especially don’t want our first time to be in my childhood bedroom with my parents, brother, and your mom right down the hall.”

“At least Steven’s not here,” I say lightheartedly, my thumb moving back and forth against the skin of his collarbone.

A shiver wracks his body at the mere thought, “If we do ever have sex I do not want to even be in the same town as Steven.”

“I’m glad we’re on the same page.” Ideas start rolling into my head for the next time we can be alone. 

“Now can we please go to bed?” He practically begs as he presses kisses up my jaw. The feel of his lips against my skin is overwhelming. I can barely nod my head yes before he’s leading me back to his bed. 

Once we’re under the covers he pulls me in close until my head is resting on his chest. I can hear his heartbeat and it’s thumping a little faster than normal. So is mine. It’s like everything has shifted between us. We said I love you. The three biggest words you could say to someone, and we said it after two months. 

It feels right. It feels like a warm blanket right out of the dryer. I just hope this warmth lasts. 

Conrad plays with the ends of my hair as my finger glides across his chest, tracing flowers into it. “I know I’m more experienced than you Belly but I swear every time we do something it feels like the first time,” he says almost breathless. “You have no idea how incredibly nervous you make me. It’s like anytime you look at me I turn into a complete idiot.”

“You’re just saying that,” I mumble against his skin. How could anyone look at me and get nervous? 

“No I’m not. Do you remember what I said to you on the dock last year? You don’t know the effect you have on people. You don’t know the effect you have on me, Belly.” His hand goes from my arm sliding up to my chin, tilting it up so I’m looking him in the eye. “You have taken over my mind. Do you know that I couldn’t focus in my lab today? I could’ve blown up the lab because all I could think about was you. Seeing you, being in the same room as you. Touching you,” his hand moves from my hair to my waist sliding under my shirt. “Kissing you,” he leans down, capturing my lips into an intoxicating kiss. 

Conrad shifts us until I’m under him. His hands start to wander under my shirt. He rubs circles into my hips before going higher, cupping my breasts in his hands. 

“You’re so beautiful,” he whispers against my lips. 

“You’re just saying that,” I tell him breaking away and looking to the side. 

He shakes his head, “You really don’t get it do you?” He sighs and tugs on my shirt, “Can I take this off?” He asks softly. 

“Yes,” I nod breathlessly. His fingers dust against my skin and the sides of my breast as he pulls my shirt off and over my head, throwing it onto the floor beside the bed. “Let me show you how beautiful I think you are,” he whispers. He kisses my lips softly, “Your lips are perfect, soft and supple against my own.” His lips move to my cheek before trailing down my jaw to my neck where he kisses the spot that makes me gasp. “And the sounds that come out of them drive me crazy.”

His lips trail over my chest, sending shivers down my spine. “You’re perfect, just the way you are.”

I gasp as he presses kisses to the tops of my breast, “No I’m not, my boobs are too big. I hate them.”

He chuckles, shaking his head, “I think they’re perfect. They fit in my hands perfectly and you’re so sensitive,” he nips at the underside of my breast and takes a nipple into his mouth laving it with attention before switching to the underside. A soft moan escapes from my lips as I arch my back pushing into his mouth. 

When he’s given my chest enough attention he moves onto my stomach pressing open mouthed kisses against the skin and I can’t help but lace my hands through his hair. “You have the most beautiful curves, Isabel,” he murmurs. “Hips that I can grasp, that make me want to sin over and over again. The first time I remember not being able to take my eyes off of you in that way, was your birthday, you in that bikini. It took everything in me not to stare at you. I thought you were the most beautiful girl I had ever seen. I thought Steven would kill me if I looked at you too long.”

Conrad’s lips move lower and lower on my stomach until they hit right above my waistband. I look down at him expectantly but he just smirks at me in that stupid way and skips right over my shorts. 

He presses kisses to my thighs, his tongue peeking out, swiping along my heated skin. “And these thighs baby,” he groans into my skin. “God, these thighs are fucking perfect. Every night this week I have fallen asleep to the image of them wrapped around me. My hips, my back, my neck. I just keep replaying last weekend over and over. You looked like an angel, your chest flushed, your pouty lips in an ‘o’ shape as you came. I have never seen anyone look so debauched but so angelic at the same time.” Leave it to Conrad to use his academic vocabulary as he seduces me. His lips move higher until my shorts are pushed up my thighs and he can’t reach any more skin. 

He sits back and stares at the fabric as if it's personally offended him. Like it's keeping him from his prize. His fingers hook into the waistband of my shorts and he slowly pulls them down revealing my center to him. His eyes trail over my most private of areas, I know I’m wet, I can feel it and he’s just staring at it. He did this to me. His kisses. His words. They have this effect on me. He has this effect on me. 

His hands spread over my thighs, massaging them softly before pulling them apart until he can settle in between them. My breath hitches as his thumb runs through my slit up to my clit, pressing it softly. A soft moan falls from my mouth causing Conrad to groan. “You’re fucking perfect, holy shit. You’re so sensitive.” I try not to move my hips at all, letting him take control. 

He makes me wait, torturing me slowly as he takes me in. “I want to see if you taste just as good as last time. Can I?” He asks, his eyes darting up to mine. All you can see is a thin ring of blue, his pupils blown wide. He licks his lips before pressing kisses onto my thighs. 

“Yes, please Connie. Please touch me. I-I need you,” I say breathlessly, my body practically buzzing with want. 

Conrad smiles and presses a kiss to my hip bone before trailing downward. Every kiss is sending shocks through my body, leaving me anxious with anticipation. Finally, his tongue licks a trail up my center collecting my wetness. 

He groans, leaning his head against my thigh, “God baby, you taste like heaven. Like whiskey and candy.”

He doesn’t give me a moment to respond, he dives back in. His lips and tongue perform a dance of their own, unique and unspoken. His thumb rubs circles into my clit coaxing soft moans out of me that I smother with my hand. 

“One of these days I’m gonna be able to hear those moans like I should. Loud and uninhibited. I want to hear you, Isabel,” he says against my skin. Another moan falls from my lips at the thought, I want that so badly. My mind starts going a mile a minute trying to figure out how we can be alone. 

Those thoughts are abruptly cut off when two fingers enter me and he takes my clit into his mouth. “Oh God,” I moan. I move my hand so he can hear me “Connie I’m so close.”

His fingers drag slowly against my walls, extracting moans and whimpers from deep in my chest. “Let go. Please, I want to watch you fall apart baby,” he begs. He curls both fingers, hitting a spot inside of me, and I shatter under him. My hands find his hair, threading my fingers through the strands and pushing his mouth further into me. 

I’m boneless against the bed, my chest heaving with every breath. But Conrad doesn’t stop. His mouth and fingers keep going, working me up again, “One more, just one more, Isabel,” his voice is desperate, pleading with me. Like if he doesn’t get one more orgasm out of me he’ll die, like it’s the only thing keeping him alive. 

It’s too much but not enough at the same time. I tug on his hair but he doesn’t let up, his fingers thrust faster, his mouth wrapped around my clit and next thing I know, I’m falling apart again. 

It takes everything in me not to scream but I manage it somehow. Fireworks go off behind my eyelids, heat coursing through my body as it overtakes me. He doesn’t stop. He continues helping me ride the waves until I’m completely unraveled. I tug on his hair, wanting him closer, needing his body pressed against me. Like I can’t bear another second with his lips not on mine. He takes the hint and his fingers leave me, his tongue darting out, licking up my essence. I look down and watch as he kisses his way back up my body before capturing my lips into a desperate kiss. 

“Don’t ever doubt how much I love you. I will show you again and again if I have to,” he says earnestly, looking into my eyes. 

I smirk, “Don’t threaten me with a good time, Connie.” He laughs, shaking his head at me before kissing me again and rolling over onto his pillow. 

My hands start to wander down his neck, to his chest, to his abs that I was admiring earlier. Finally, my fingers find the edge of his pants and one hand starts toying with the waistband. 

Conrad pulls his lips away abruptly and my hand freezes as he looks at me. “Belly,” he says, his eyes searching mine for an answer. 

“I-is this okay?” I ask nervously, gnawing my lip between my teeth, 

“Yeah,” he says quickly, a blush forming high on his cheeks. He coughs awkwardly and in a normal tone says, “Yes but are you sure? I mean, you don’t have to do this.”

His eyes are searching mine for a hint of doubt. I stare back at him resolutely, “I want to. O-only if it’s okay with you though.”

“It’s more than fine,” he breathes, relaxing his head against the pillows.

“Good,” I say with a dopey smile, his grin matching mine. 

He leans in kissing me again and I get bold, slipping my hand under his waistband. He shivers when my hand wraps around his length. I try not to show it on my face but he’s big. My hand slowly starts to move up and down and I watch as his face relaxes with pleasure. 

Seeing him like this makes my heart swell. I’m doing this, I’m the reason for his pleasure. My thumb swipes over the tip, collecting the wetness there and spreading it down his length.

 “Belly,” he moans softly. He takes in a shuddering breath, trying to keep his cool.

 I try to find something to say but words don’t come to me.I keep thinking about all the things he said to me, how I want to say those things too. But I know they would just sound childish rather than seductive coming out of my mouth. 

He curses softly under his breath as I pick up my pace slightly. His head is thrown back against the pillows, his neck flushed and lips open letting swear words slip out with every stroke of my hand. 

“Fuck, Belly,” he whispers harshly. His breathing is picking up, becoming more ragged. He suddenly surges forward pulling me into a kiss. With  one more pump of my hand he’s coming. He releases a shuddering breath into my mouth and I feel his entire body relax. I can feel his release on my wrist and a little on my palm. I stroke him a few more times before pulling my hand out of his pants

Conrad’s eyes follow mine to my palm where his spend is painted across. I bring my palm up to my lips and dart my tongue out as I maintain eye contact with Conrad. His eyes are wide as I clean my palm and wrist of him. 

When I’m done he surges forward and kisses me hungrily. His tongue sweeping through my mouth and devouring me. His hands find my waist, squeezing them softly. He presses me back into the pillows, his body pressed up against mine and I realize all that is separating us is his thin pajama pants. 

“Conrad,” I gasp, pulling away from him. His lips go to my neck sucking and biting, “W-we need to get dressed. I promised the moms the door would be unlocked at night.”

He pulls back slightly, his hair is all messed up from my fingers and his eyes are dilated to the max. “Y-yeah, okay,” he replies, like he’s not all there. 

“Connie?” I ask pushing his hair back slightly. “You okay?”

“Yeah, yeah, you just-” he chuckles softly, “You kind of just rocked my world. Just give me a second.” I giggle and kiss him again, softer this time as he gets his bearings. 

Eventually he pulls back and gets up from the bed gathering my clothes he pulled off me earlier. He helps me get dressed, kissing the skin of my stomach before it’s covered by my shirt and kissing my thighs once my shorts are on. “I’ll be right back,” he says softly. He goes to his dresser grabbing a new pair of pants and a shirt and goes into the bathroom to change. 

When he comes out he throws his old pajamas into the hamper and unlocks his door before climbing back into bed next to me. He pulls me in close, kissing me deeply. “I love you.”

“I love you too.” He smiles and kisses me one last time before leaning back against the pillows. 

I fall asleep wrapped in his arms, happier than I’ve ever been. 

The next morning we’re woken up abruptly. “What the fuck is happening here?” Adam asks angrily, standing at the end of the bed with his arms crossed. 

I shoot up in bed clutching the blanket to my chest even though I’m covered. Conrad stays relaxed against the pillows, one hand behind his head, the other going to my back rubbing soothing circles on it. “We were sleeping before you came in here,” he snaps. 

“You two are not allowed to sleep in the same bed,” he tells us. 

My voice is small as I say, “Um, m-mom and Susannah said it was okay as long as we kept the door unlocked.” 

Adam’s face turns red with anger, “Susannah!” He yells. 

The moms and Jeremiah come running in and I feel my face on fire. Does everyone have to witness this?

“What? What’s wrong?” Susannah asks worriedly. 

“Is everything okay?” My mom asks. 

Jeremiah’s face is pinched with worry, “Dad, why are you yelling?”

Adam points at us in the bed, “Did you say that they could share a bed?”

Susannah’s shoulders fall, the tension leaving her body. “Yeah, Laurel and I discussed it, we said it was fine as long as they kept the door unlocked.”

“I can’t believe you! You didn’t discuss this with me first! They can’t share a bed under our roof, Suze. It’s not happening,” he says, trying–and failing–at putting his foot down. 

Susannah’s eyes burn with anger as she looks at her husband, “I don’t need to discuss it with you first, this is my house. If you want to be involved in decisions maybe you should be here longer than a few days at a time.” Holy shit. Jere lets out a low whistle and I can feel Conrad tense next to me at his moms words. 

Adam flounders for a response but eventually just leaves the room. 

Conrad clears his throat and everyone turns to us still in bed, “Can you guys maybe leave?”

The moms chuckle and walk out of the room, my mom telling us breakfast will be ready in ten. 

Jere just smirks and once the moms are out of the room he says, “Why? Got a little problem?”

Conrad’s face turns red in annoyance, his hand on my back is now on my hip and it tightens slightly. I smirk back at Jere, “He’s got a problem but it’s not little,” I say lowly. 

Jere cackles all the way out of the room. Once the door is shut I look down at Conrad and he’s already looking up at me in shock. “What?”

“I can’t believe you said that.”

I shrug and lay back down on his chest staring up at him. “It got him out of here.”

“We should go downstairs anyways. We don’t want a hangry, Belly,” he says jokingly. I scoff and slap him on the chest but get out of bed. 

I grab one of Conrad’s sweatshirts so that my mom and Susannah don’t comment on my pajamas. We eat breakfast with everyone, Adam is still not happy but everyone ignores him and chatters around him. 

“Bean, we have to be out of here in an hour so make sure you’re all packed up,” my mom says as she puts her plate in the sink. 

“Come on, we can’t stay one more night?” I whine.

“No, I have a meeting with my publisher tomorrow. One hour and then we have to hit the road,” she says leaving no room to argue. 

After breakfast I head upstairs to the guest room and shower quickly. When I’m walking out of the bathroom in just a towel I jump at the sight of Conrad sitting on the edge of my bed. “What the hell? You scared the crap out of me.”

He smirks, laughing softly, “Sorry.” He walks up to me putting his hands on my hips over the towel. “Ya know I think this is my favorite outfit of yours,” he says lowly.

“Oh yeah?” I ask, biting my lip. 

He nods his head, “Yeah.” Then he pulls me in for a deep kiss. I bring one hand up to his hair while the other keeps hold of the towel. 

As the kiss gets more intense it becomes harder to hold my towel up. “Connie,” I gasp out. “My towel is slipping. I have to get dressed.” His hands grip the towel tighter, bunching it up. He groans softly into my mouth but he nods and kisses me one last time. He steps back giving me some space. We’re both panting hard and my mind is racing with everything I want to do with him. 

“I’ll be outside when you’re ready,” he says before leaving the room, the door shutting tight behind him. 

I stand in the middle of the room getting my bearings together. My body is practically buzzing with want. It takes everything in me not to pull him back into the room. I take a shaky breath and start to get dressed. I look in the mirror and gasp at the dark marks on my chest and neck. I’m gonna kill him. I pull on a pair of pants, holding my towel to my chest as I pull open the door and drag my boyfriend back into the room. 

“Wh-?” 

“You marked me!” I exclaim, dropping my towel and gesturing to the tops of my breast. He looks down and a smug smile graces his face. “You’re proud of this?” I ask incredulously. 

“Well…” he sings. “I mean, I’m not not proud of it.” He grabs me by the waist pulling me in, he leans his head down and presses soft kisses to the marks there. “I like knowing that you have my mark on you.”

“I never took you for a caveman,” I quipped. 

“Only for you,” he says, nipping at my skin. I laugh and push his head away as I continue getting dressed. I put on his sweatshirt that I wore this morning, it’s from his high school and has his mascot–a wolf–and his football number–8–on the back. He wraps his arm around my waist and pulls me in, “I like you in my clothes.”

“You’re really into this possessive thing, aren’t you?” I laugh. He nods against my neck making me giggle again. 

He lets go of me and grabs my suitcase and hauls it downstairs for me into the car. My mum and I say goodbye to Susannah, Adam and Jere inside the house. 

Mom hugs Conrad before getting into the car, letting us say goodbye in private. Conrad pulls me in close and kisses me softly, very much aware that my mom and most likely Susannah are snooping on us. 

I pull back slightly, “You know how I said last night I wasn’t ready?” He nods slightly, a curious look on his face. “Well, I’m not. Not yet. But… I think soon.” He just stares at me and I become self conscious under his gaze. “Conrad?”

He snaps out of it, “Yeah. Yeah. Sorry.” He releases a slow breath. “Soon, huh? I’ll wait however long Belly. I don’t care about that. Whenever you’re ready, I will be too.”

I smile and pull him into a kiss, “I love you.”

“I love you too. I’ll see you next week.” He opens the car door for me and I get in. I watch him from the mirror as we pull away. Once we turn the corner I sigh and sit back in my seat, my mind racing with everything that’s happened in the last twenty four hours. 

As we cross the border into Connecticut I type out a text to Conrad and hit send. 

Have you ever seen a snowy beach? ❄️