Chapter Text
what should have happened at the end of 1x09:
“Please leave us” Elizabeth spoke to the woman who was helping her get into her dress.
Philip stood there with his hands on both sides of the bed.
He was angry.
Angry with her.
Angry with himself.
Angry with the situation.
Angry with the crown which had seemed to tear their lives apart.
“I have nothing to hide from you…nothing” she spoke out as Philip raised his head to look at her. “Porchey is a friend” she spoke, her voice soft yet harsh “and yes…there are those who would have preferred me to marry him…indeed, marriage with him might have been easier”
That pain in his chest.
That feeling of not being good enough.
Not being worth her love.
“Might have even worked better than ours” she continued.
He hadn’t spoken; he hadn’t been able to speak.
Feeling the weight of the world pressed against his shoulders.
Had they really come to this point?
Did she really regret marrying him?
“But to everyone’s regret and frustration…the only person I have ever loved is you. And can you honestly look me in the eye and say the same”
“Can you?” she asked blankly.
He didn’t know if it was the frustration that had accumulated in the past couple of weeks, their inability to communicate, the frustration and jealousy he had felt seeing her with Porchey…but he stayed silent.
He wanted to shout…he wanted to tell her that she was the only woman he had ever loved. That everything that she said was wrong. That he was hers. And yet, he was silent. He looked into her eyes.
She was hurt…broken.
And it was all his fault.
He had broken the promise he had made to her father so many years ago.
The promise he had made to her.
Loving her.
Protecting her.
There will be no greater act…of love.
He remembered the king’s words very clearly. What he realized in that moment as she turned to walk out of the room was that in the midst of trying to protect her from the world, he…the person closest to her…had hurt her the most.
“Elizabeth” he heard himself speak. “Wait” he continued, watching her freeze with her hand on the door handle.
He didn’t know what to say to her.
He had acted like such a petulant child for so long.
Sulking around the palace not realizing how badly he was hurting her. Thinking only about himself and how the situation had been affecting him. “Please don’t walk away” he spoke softly, practically a whisper.
“I don’t want to fight with you Philip”
He could hear the pain in her voice.
She was tired. Tired of his attitude. Tired of their fighting. Tired of having to carry the weight of the world herself. He was supposed to be there for her. To help her carry the burden of the crown. He was supposed to be a supportive, loving husband and he had failed.
“I’m sorry” He spoke, simply.
No explanation.
No insight into what he was sorry about.
She didn’t know.
If it had been a couple of years ago, she would have known exactly what he was sorry for.
Any time they had argued before she was queen, their reconciliation had been very quick.
Now everything was so complicated.
So hard.
She had been angry with him for so long.
Those two words were starting to melt the wall she had instinctively put up.
She didn’t speak. She remained silent and waited.
Slowly she turned her body towards his as she heard him walk toward her.
She didn’t meet his gaze.
She couldn’t.
“I never should have acted the way that I did…i’m sorry about everything” he continued “for how I acted when you became queen” he spoke as he placed his hand under her chin, urging her to look up at him “I promised to support you…and I have done exactly the opposite…i’m sorry for how I acted about you working with Porchey…but please understand where i’m coming from…”
“Philip please…why can’t you understand that I don’t have feelings for Porchey” She spoke quietly.
“I understand that Lilibet, what I need you to understand is that this isn’t about what you DON’T feel for him but what HE feels for you…”he rebutted, trying to make her understand where his feelings were coming from. He needed her to understand why he had behaved the way he did. He needed her to know how much he loved her. How much he wanted her. How he spent every minute thinking about her.
“I need you to understand how it makes me feel when I see the way he looks at you” Philip replied, placing his hands on both sides of her waist “knowing the thoughts that go through his head” he continued, pulling her body against his “I know Lilibet” “Philip” was all she could murmur as she felt his head in the crook of her neck, his mouth grazing against her ear. “I know because I have all of those thoughts about you…thinking constantly about having you close to me” he placed a soft kiss under her ear “feeling your body pressed against mine” he moved lower before gently sucking on her collarbone. He didn't care if he left a mark. In fact, he wanted to. He wanted Porchey to see it and know that she was his.
“Wanting to make you mine ALL the time” he spoke as his hands trailed down to her hips.
“Don’t you understand Philip” She spoke, trying to concentrate and speak clearly as his actions were clearly clouding her mind “I AM yours” she continued placing her arms around his shoulders “I’ve always been yours” she watched his gaze meet hers “you are the only man that i have ever loved…the first and only man in my life”
“Mon petit chou” he smirked “YOU are the only woman that I have ever loved…the only woman who occupies my thoughts at all hours of the day…YOU are the essence of who I am” he gave her a soft smile, feeling the tears swell in his eyes.
He didn’t understand how they had gotten so lost, so caught up in their problems, how could they lose sight of what was right in front of them?
“This right here” he spoke “is the most important thing and I promise to never lose sight of it again” he continued, watching her face light up as a tear rolled down her cheek.
“I promise the same my love” she spoke, feeling the weight come off of her chest.
“Promise me you won’t make a jealous scene every time we have to meet with Porchey, darling we need the horses trained” Elizabeth urged him, drawing soft patterns into his shoulders.
“Lilibet” he spoke “I don’t think I’ll be able to my love…the simple sight of that man next to you makes my blood boil”
“Well then, we will just have to fix that won’t we” Elizabeth spoke, grabbing his hand before she led him to the bed “I was thinking of two ideas you might like” she continued as she pushed him back onto the bed.
“Which are” “Well first, I was wondering if you would like to accompany me to the meeting regarding the horse training” she suggested. Elizabeth knew that Philip trusted her but she also knew her husband was a man who liked to show what was his and she thought he might enjoy spending some quality time with her.
“With Porchey” he spoke, feeling his anger build up at having to mention his name.
“Yes darling” she replied “but if it makes you feel any better” Elizabeth continued, taking the sash off and tossing it across the room “we can have our own fun while he trains the horses” Elizabeth moved her body closer to Philip who was splayed out on the bed.
She gently raked her nails over his clothed legs.
She longed to feel his body pressed against hers, but all in due time.
She wanted them to take their time.
To show him slowly how she loved him and only him.
She had known that he was never too fond of Porchey since their courtship when her parents tried to set her up with him knowing that she was with Philip but she had believed that his disdain had subsided after she made it more than clear that she wanted no one but him.
“And what kind of fun are you suggesting?” Philip teased, watching as she lowered herself onto her knees in front of him.
She was a queen. She ruled an entire country. She could have anyone bow down to her if she wanted yet here she was, dressed in her full battle dress on her knees for her husband. A sight that would never fail to make Philip weak in the knees.
“Something similar to what I plan on doing to you right now” Elizabeth spoke softly, moving her hands to his pants.
She watched his face go from one of curiosity to burning desire.
He wanted her and the thought of the pleasure only she could give him was making the desire pool through her body as she pulled his pants down, passed his ankles and tossed them across the room.
Finally his erection sprung free.
The object of her desires in front of her.
She could tell he was painfully hard and it only made her want to tease him more. She wanted to bring him to the cusp of pleasure before pulling back over and over again before she let him fully submerge himself in her. Like he had done so many times to her. Their desperation for each other was something that had only helped their marital relations.
Elizabeth gave him a wild look before she grabbed his erection between her hands. Slowly, she moved her head down and swirled her tongue around the tip. She was gentle and soft as she took him in her mouth.
As she quickened the movements of her mouth gliding up and down his shaft, she looked up at him through her lashes. He was coming undone in front of her. A sight she would never tire of seeing. It made the desire she felt build up in the pit of her stomach when she saw him like that. Her husband who was a force of nature, wild, reckless-groaning endlessly as he looked toward her with desire.
Knowing that they were free together and could be completely themselves in the privacy of their own bedroom.
He was completely hers just as she was his in every way.
She moved her head at a quicker pace, feeling the way he was losing more and more control.
“You have to stop” she heard him whimper “I’m close and-” he continued as he struggled to form a complete sentence “I don’t want to finish in your mouth my love”
Although Elizabeth had learned how much her husband enjoyed this particular act in their bedroom, it had only been once before when he had finished in her mouth, but this particular night, she wanted to go further.
She wanted to feel him- all of him-and she wanted to taste him.
And so she did.
She started sucking, slowly at first, but then she let Philip mark the rhythm with the hand that he had already put above her head, his fingers stroking around her hair.
Her mouth started to go faster and faster, just like he enjoyed it and even if Elizabeth felt like she couldn't take more, she didn’t want to stop.
She wanted to please her husband, to make him moan, to make him scream, to make him lose all those negative thoughts that he had felt.
As she moved her head quicker, she moved one hand to massage his balls and just like that, she felt him let go.
Her mouth filled with him as he threw his head back, feeling a wave of pleasure course through his body as he filled her mouth.
She could feel the heat of his cum sliding over her tongue, but she waited for him to open his eyes.
And in the minute he did so, she swallowed, licked her own lips and and bit the lower one, with lust sparkling in her deep blue eyes.
That actually surprised him.
She used to spit it out, mostly.
But that time she swallowed it, and Philip felt he was touching heaven with his fingertips just by looking at his wife.
As he let his weight leave his body as he was pressed against the mattress, Philip lifted his head to see Elizabeth beginning to unzip the back of her dress.
“Wait” he spoke…his voice raspy “you know how much I love to undress you darling” he continued, as he walked toward her, reaching out to place his hand on the zipper of her dress.
“You have no idea” he started, pulling down the zipper slowly “how much I have wanted to tear this dress off of you” he spoke, as the dress pulled at her ankles.
She stood there with her back to him, in just a slip.
More than ever, Elizabeth wanted out of her clothing.
He had been back from his tour for a few weeks, yet she had still felt like they were so far from each other for way to long.
She longed for his company while her body ached for him, for his closeness-his touch.
She suddenly became very aware of his hands trailing up her back as her body felt chills at his sudden touch.
He had turned her around to face him.
Those piercing blue eyes, The same eyes that had made her fall in love with him all of those years ago had the same look in them that they had so many times before.
She knew what he wanted and she desired exactly the same thing.
“Philip” she spoke softly after a while, before he pulled her closer to him-pressing his lips to hers.
His hands found their way around her waist while she got lost in the taste of him.
“Tell me darling” he spoke as they separated “what do you want”
“I want you” she spoke softly “I want to be yours again” she continued while she felt him move them backward toward the bed.
He took both of her hands in his before he sat on the bed, urging her to come closer to him.
His eyes were locked on hers, he trailed his hand up her shoulder before he tugged at the string that held one of the sleeves of her slip up.
“Do you remember the first time I undressed you my darling” Philip asked, watching her eyes get clouded with a dark haze of lust.
She nodded slowly, feeling that familiar pool of desire in the pit of her stomach at the memory.
//
They had just gotten engaged…not that anyone had known about it then.
Their relationship had still been private from everyone including her family.
She had gone to see him one night. In the privacy of his Naval quarters where he had gotten down on a knee and professed his love to her.
She had been so happy that she said yes before even considering the permission that she needed from her father.
They had been overtaken by the feeling of overwhelming happiness that they had kissed in a way that they had never been permitted to.
Their kisses had become more intense as they were alone and had no one there to stop them.
Elizabeth vividly remembered the feeling of his hands trailing her body and the desire to feel that same touch on her bare skin.
The way that they had backed up to the tiny bed in his quarters, they had fallen back onto it while his hands efficiently worked her out of her coat and his hands had gone passed her day dress.
She wanted him and was more than ready for the slip to get torn off of her body.
She wanted him and had no desire to wait.
After all, they had just gotten engaged.
But in that same moment, there had been a knock at the door, indicating that their time together had ended as their was someone very inopportune interrupting them.
After that, it had felt as if they had not gotten another moment alone together until their wedding night.
//
“We were in your Naval Quarters” she murmured, feeling him trail his hand up her other arm before he tugged at the sting of the opposite sleeve.
“Mhm” he spoke softly, pulling her slip down so that her chest was left exposed in front of him.
“It had been the first time I was truly able to touch you” he spoke, before he moved his hands to begin massaging her breasts “all I wanted in that moment was to make you mine”
“Just as much as I wanted to be yours…” She spoke while she felt her breath catch in her throat as he leaned forward, as he began to swirl his tongue around one of her breasts. “
Even if it went against all royal protocol” he teased, feeling her hand tug at his hair.
“I couldn’t care less about the royal protocol” she smirked when he finally pulled the slip down, leaving her fully naked before him “Especially when most of the things we’ve done in this bedroom would most definitely be frowned upon by the institution”
“Well, who doesn’t love a bit of bad behavior?” he laughed as he moved from the bed and began to shed his clothes.
When he was left as bare as she was, he again went to the bed, but this time, he pulled her into his arms taking her with him.
“Or a lot of bad behavior” she joked, placing her begs on both sides of his hips.
“Well my love. How else would I be able to show you how much I have missed you recently” Philip spoke, trailing his hands up her back side, before he gave her ass a squeeze.
“Show me…how much you have missed me” Elizabeth whispered, leaning forward so that her breasts grazed his upper chest, while she left a trail of kisses up his jawline until she got to his ear where she slowly teased him with her tongue.
He let out a groan before he placed his hands on both sides of her hips before he rolled them around so that she was under him.
Their lips met again in a passionate kiss while their tongues danced together while Elizabeth moved her nails down his back as she thrusted her hips forward due to her impatience.
“I missed you more than you can imagine darling” he whispered against her.
His lips again captured hers, gently sucking on her lower lip as he drew circles against her sensitive skin.
The caress caused her hips to move against his and she heard him groan as her move sent pleasure to his most sensitive part.
Philip again felt her smile against his lips and as she was encouraged by his growing hardness against her thigh, she moved her hands down to touch his hardened member before she gave it a squeeze and felt him hiss under her touch, as her lip was given a light nibble.
She shifted in her position underneath him and spread her legs so he could rest between them.
Philip moaned loudly as her hands touched him, and she enjoyed the feeling of him and the pleasure he very much was in need of after all of the fighting they had dealt with.
As his breathing grew heavier and she felt the warm hardness throb in her hands, she arched her back, her most private parts ready for him to enter her.
To give her everything that she had been needing from him for months on end.
They had both missed each other and now was their time to show it. Instinctively, she opened her hips wider as she was more than ready for him.
With a drawn out moan, Philip entered her with a gasp, as she let out a moan of pleasure.
Watching her face, he flexed his hips. And finally, slowly, he began to move.
He wanted to be slow and steady, to draw out the feeling that they both desperately desired but that same part of him was battling with the part of him who wanted to fuck her as hard as he possibly could until she screamed his name and he didn’t care who at the palace heard.
“Oh! Ooh, that feels so good!” she moaned at the pleasure of him inside her.
He grinned, and buried his mouth in hers, kissing her with a thrusting tongue.
She raised her hips to meet him, and kept pace as his speed increased.
“Faster! Please” she hurriedly spoke as he began to move at a quicker pace. Her moans continued as she neared her climax.
Philip began to move faster.
His eyes closed, and his expression was focused on pleasure. So passionate and rough and she was loving every minute of it.
“Do you like this Elizabeth” he murmured into her ear, a whisper so soft that no one else would ever be able to ear “you like it when I fuck you rough don’t you darling” he continued before he slightly bit down on her neck.
“Yes! so much” she exclaimed, not caring about the fact that any palace worker could probably hear them with her screams.
“Please Philip, I want you to-“ With a final few moves, he plunged deeper and faster and filled her. He lowered his head to her shoulder, and softly kissed her as they came apart together. Finally they both felt whole again.
They had made so many mistakes and let so many unimportant people and problems get in between their relationship.
But finally that was no longer going to exist.
The finally both understood that their love for each other needed to come first and that they mattered more than anything else.
Their family and their love.
So they laid there together, legs intertwined, as they calmly rested in each other's arms.
“So i'm assuming you agree with what I proposed earlier” Elizabeth spoke with a small smile after a while.
“Of course, my dear” he replied, drawing soft circles into her arm “And weren't there two propositions that you had” he asked.
“Yes…well you already heard the first” she spoke, softly.
“And the second” he asked, a curious expression on his face.
“Well…I was hoping” “that we could start sharing a bedroom again”
“Oh really” he replied, faking a surprised voice.
“Yes darling, in my opinion, we have spent quite a long while away from each other, don't you agree?” She asked, pulling herself up to ask him.
“I could not agree more mon petit chou” Philip replied with a grin painted across his face as he placed his hand on the side of her face and leaned in to press his lips against hers.