Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

“Can you still remember stuff? Like about mom and life before the fire?” Sam asks one night just after Christmas.

They’re lying in Dean’s bed, he should probably just give up and call it their bed, both naked and tangled up in each other. Dean had been drifting off comforted by the warmth of his too big little brother’s head on his chest. Well, until Sam decided to start chatting.

“Yeah some of it,” Dean responds after a moment, “Why?”

Sam just hums in response, nuzzling his cheek against him. Dean settles down once more, arm thrown over Sam’s shoulder and begins to drift off. It’s not often they get to be like this, there is usually someone to save or a monster to kill. Dean would sooner pull off his nails before admitting that he kind of loves these moments of quiet.

“What do you remember?” Sam asks and Dean groans, his brother has an uncanny knack for catching him on the edge of sleep and he's beginning to think it's intentional.

“I dunno… I don’t have a whole bunch of memories just images, smells and words I know mom said. I remember when they told me mom was pregnant. I remember taking lunch to dad at work sometimes, I think mom liked watching him work,” Dean finds himself saying much to his own surprise. “Oh and I remember my fourth birthday party we had it at the firehouse and I got to sit in the truck… dad knew the fire chief or something.”

Sam chuckles a little as he says it. “Ah that’s where the fireman thing came from.”

“Dude I was four and firemen are cool. I wanted to be a big hero,” Dean protests lightly.

“You are though.”

It’s just a whisper but Dean hears it. The way his heart clenches makes him choose to ignore the statement.

When January 24^th rolls around Dean doesn’t even remember the conversation, lost among the hundreds of other hazy post coitus talks they’ve had.

He only remembers his birthday because Sam kisses his cheek and whispers it to him in the morning. That’s the only indication that he’s officially a year older that he has. They go about their day as usual.

Dean makes breakfast while Sam sets out on his run. They eat together in silence but it’s comfortable. Dean washes baby and Sam watches, pointing out missed spots both real and imaginary until Dean turns the hose on him. It devolves into heated rutting against the still damp hood of the Impala fairly quickly after that. After they’ve changed and Sam’s rung out his hair they settle into the library. Dean cleaning the weapons and Sam looking for cases. Eventually Dean makes lunch and eventually Sam switches from the laptop to a dog eared copy of The Eye of the World, which might actually be the same one Sam had bought when he was ten.

It’s around five when Sam comes back out of his book and stares at him, biting at his lower lip.

“I’m hungry,” Sam finally announces.

“There’s left overs in the fridge,” Dean throws back.

“Dean,” Sam says and it comes out in the little brother whine that Dean sometimes forgets Sam can still do.

He sighs and looks up from the laptop, where he is definitely not playing Minesweeper, “What?”

“I really want a chef’s salad from that place on main,” Sam says and Dean doesn’t have look up to know Sam’s pouting.

“Go get it then,” Dean says and he turns anyway, he knows he’s already lost when he sees the full force of the puppy dog eyes on him.

“I don’t want to and besides Baby hasn’t been out in days,” Sam retorts giving Dean an excuse to say yes.

Which is exactly what he does. He drives to the Italian place and gets Sam his salad, and so what if he sticks around for a few extra minutes drinking a beer. Sam deserves to wait considering there was perfectly good food in the bunker. He grins a little at the text that comes after thirty minutes.

Where are you?

Getting your salad princess. Be home in 20. He thumbs back and finishes the beer.

Sam’s in the bunker garage when he gets back but that’s not what makes Dean suspicious. No, what makes him raise a brow at his brother is the fact that Sam’s eyes are actually glittering, like something out of a chick novel.

“Uh Sam?” Is all he gets out before Sam has him by the hand and is dragging him into the interior of the bunker.

Just before they get to door to the library, obviously Sam’s destination since much to Dean’s dismay they walked straight past the bedrooms, Sam stops and quickly plants a kiss to his lips. Then they’re off again.

“SURPRISE!”

Dean stumbles back a little in shock, knocking into Sam who clearly reads the urge to bolt and holds his arm firmly.

There’s a cheesy birthday banner stuck to the ends of the book shelves and on the table there’s so much food Dean wonders where they’re going to store the left overs. He chooses to not look directly at the pile of presents on the far table.

But best, or worst, of all is the people standing around.

Cas, Charlie, Garth and even Bess (who Dean makes a note to ask about the clearly pregnant belly), Jodie and both girls, and hell even Donna Hanscum is there. Dean barely chokes out a “Woah” when he realizes that it is literally everyone.

His entire messed up little family is right there and he knows exactly who to blame.

He throws a look over his shoulder as Sam steers him into the room. Sam just smiles, so much brighter than he’s seen in a while, and leans down and whispers “I could have invited Crowley,” into his ear.

Dean shakes his head but before he can respond Charlie is already on him wrapping him in a huge hug.

They chat and drink. Dean wonders how much Sam spent on beer. Donna is the one who spills about the party planning.

“Oh ya, Sam called me right around New Years and asked about it,” She tells him cheerfully.

They eat. There’s dozens of wings and three different types of pizza. Dean’s more than a little overwhelmed and Sam always seems to be on the other side of the room when he gets a second alone.

It’s Claire, of course it is, who makes a fire extinguisher joke when Sam and Charlie bring in the cake covered in candles.

Dean seriously considers running when they start singing Happy Birthday. Sam’s voice is the loudest when everyone finishes with “and many more.”

Things only get the slightest bit awkward when a conversation between Cas and Claire gets a little heated. Jody steps in with all the power of a mother bear and Charlie is the one to manage to lighten the mood again.

Garth is the one to call for presents, Bess joins in the good natured demands that he opens them in front of everyone.

Dean sighs dramatically but allows Sam to lead him to the chair.

Claire and Alex’s names are both on the Disney princess bag Sam drops in his lap with a laugh. He growls playfully at it and everyone chuckles. Inside is a copy of “Grumpy Cat: A Grumpy Book”, a $50 gift card to Biggersons (“Hey they’re not selling Turducken any more!” Jody says in defense of her girls), and two nondescript envelopes one with Claire’s handwriting and the other with Alex’s on the outside. He saves those for later.

Donna’s gift is two board games: The Settlers of Catan and Star Trek Monopoly. “You boys need to have fun sometime!” She insists when Dean thanks her.

Dean very nearly chokes up when he open’s Jody’s gift. Nestled in a wooden box is an American Silver 12 gauge he’d seen dozens of times in his life. “I uh… the EPA came crawling around about some of the cars so I had to do clean up on the property. I found this in a gun safe in an out building. I had it cleaned up for you.” Jody says softly patting Dean’s hand. Out of the corner of his eye he can see Sam's bittersweet smile.

Before she give him his gift Charlie plops a crown on his head, “The queen officially invites you to be her knight at any further events,” and Dean laughs but keeps the crown. Her gift is a tablet. “Already set up for you,” She says and shows him all of the apps she installed, including PornHub which gets her one of Dean’s more salacious winks.

Bess and Garth present him with a photo of six different pies, apparently homemade and waiting in the bunker fridge for him. He grins and allows Garth to hug him.

Cas gives him three jars of honey and Dean raises a brow but accepts it nonetheless. “He’s still got a thing for bees” Sam whispers in his ear a moment later and Dean remembers crazy Cas and his fondness for the insects.

He opens Sam’s gifts last. A plastic box already half filled with cassettes, “I figure the old box is kind of in pieces,” he explains. Then there’s about four new flannels in varying colors. Dean uses the excuse to hug Sam and he barely notices the hand slipping into his pocket and he’s sure no one else saw so he brushes it off.

Later that night after they’ve cleaned up and everyone has gone off to their rooms, which apparently Sam had readied the bunker for 8 extra people, he pulls out a folded envelope from his front pocket.

D
Thought you’d might want this back.
S

That’s all that’s written on the outside and before he even opens the envelope he's sure he knows what it is. Sure enough, a tiny metal face stares up at him from the inside looking just the same as the last time he’d seen it. The leather cord is new though.

He can’t move fast enough to get it up over his head, back where it belongs. He does everything in his power not to go find his brother in his room and screw him through the mattress. Unfortunately, with everyone around it’s not an option, so he quashes down that urge for another day.

He lays in bed that night, not that he’s having trouble sleeping because Sam’s not there, replaying the night. As much as he wanted to kick Sam when he walked into the surprise party he can’t wait to thank him for the night. Especially for the full dimples smile that seem plastered to his little brother’s face all night.

It’s much later though, when he’s finally drifting off, the amulet clenched in his fists that he sits up with a bolt and a sinking realization.

Sam had literally spent a month planning this party out, making sure everything was perfect and arranging to get their little family out here. Yet Dean knew, because he’d been there… because Sam had told him once a couple years ago.

His little brother had never once had his own birthday party.

Chapter Text

“Sam? What’s your birthday,” Jess says from his desk where she’s currently hunched over a rental application.

“May second” Sam answers not looking up from his psychology homework.

“Okay… wait no not okay. SAM!” She’s up from the desk advancing on him quickly.

“What, what’s not okay?” He asked completely confused by her reaction.

Jess stands before him now, hands on her hips with her lips pressed into a thin line, “Sam! It’s May sixth!”

Sam’s still confused, he’s probably supposed to know what he did but he’s still completely in the dark.

Jess must see that on his face because she throws her hands in the air with an agitated growl. “Babe, your birthday was four days ago and we didn’t even go out to eat,” she griped throwing herself onto the bed next to him.

Sam smiles sheepishly at her. Right, birthdays are a big deal in the real world and now that he was truly part of it he was expected to abide by this belief.

Jess scowls at his smile and swats playfully at his face, “How have we been dating for a year and I didn’t even know your birthday. I’m such a terrible girlfriend.”

“What? No Jess, I don’t think I told anyone when my birthday is. It’s okay really,” Sam insists shutting his textbook closed with a snap.

Jess shakes her head violently and leans up on her elbows, “Nope this is not okay. We’ll have an anniversary slash birthday dinner after finals.”

Sam chuckled a little at her persistence, “Okay sweetheart whatever you want,” he placates laying on his side next to her.

Sam’s still new to the long term relationship thing and apparently this was not the right thing to say because Jess frowns. “No Sam, it’s what you want. It was your birthday!”

“Jess it’s no big deal, really,” Sam insists rubbing his hand reassuringly over her arm. “I mean it.”

Jess seems contemplative for a moment before nodding, “Next year we’re having a huge party with all the drinks,” she emphasizes with her hands thrown wide on the word ‘all’. “And you are going to get so shitfaced that you’ll let me do that thing you like,” she adds with a suggestive wink.

“Oh yeah?” Sam teases pulling her on top of him.

Jess nods before leaning down, long blond curls curtaining their faces, “Oh yeah.”