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Chapter Text

Most of what happened on the Ark is a blur. Flashes of color. Thor getting hurt. Heimdall dying. Lots of dying actually. Purple filling his vision as he gets the life strangled out of him.

Loki should be dead and he knows he should be dead. His neck is fractured if not completely broke. Before Thanos can finish the job and leave his body to space, there is an orange light then an explosion that sends them all flying. There's sparks of orange than a face.

This is the clearest part of Loki's memory besides Thanos's words. Before he passes out from the pain and lack of air, someone holds him, cradles him really. Their hands are gentle and soothing, combing through his hair and holding his head in such a way it doesn't hurt his neck.

He knows the man said something maybe to him, maybe to Thor. But this man, a Midgardian with silver hair and a mustache, a crooked nose and soft blue eyes, enchants him.

It's the look in his eyes that Loki remembers most. It's not pity. It's not hate, or lust or anything of its kind. In fact Loki wouldn't have been able to label it if he hadn't seen how Thor looked at Jane when she was ill.

Kindness. Care. Love.

Before he blacks out, Loki decides this is some crazy image of some man he seen somewhere loving someone else and his dying brain decided to give him one last image to sooth him.

And what a soothing image it is...

***********************************

Loki will admit that he is grateful Thor got him to Earth. He's grateful that Valkyrie, Brunhilde knew how to make sure his fractured neck didn't kill him and now he's alive and ready to try and mend things with Thor.

What he's not grateful for or happy about is that Thor thought the best place to bring him was New York. He's not grateful it's the Avengers and more specifically Tony Stark that is working to fix his neck and he's especially not grateful that every time he wakes up he can hear Thor arguing with someone over what to do with him.

Loki is very aware he doesn't get an opinion in this. He can run. Take whatever boat got them here and go to some planet. Sakaar, Knowhere, wherever. He doesn't have to stay here. But he's also aware he's not in any position to leave. He can barely lift his head let alone walk out of Stark Tower and steal a ship.

So through consciousness and unconsciousness, he listens to Thor argue his case. Then one day he opens his eyes and there is Bruce at the foot of his bed, eyes black with no sleep. No green on him whatsoever.

Loki is still in the same bed, with a tight neck brace that makes him panic every time he wakes up. He's in the same scratchy clothes and in the same room with little variation.

Loki swallows hard, his throat aching at the action. "Hello, Bruce." It's crackly, broken, weak. He hates it.

"Hi," Bruce says quietly. He stares at Loki for quite some time before asking, "Do you remember any of what happened up there?"

Loki doesn't like to think about it, but yes, he does remember some things. "Why?" He asks.

Bruce shrugs. "There was a lot that happened. Thor can't explain it."

"What makes you think I can?"

The man exhales a long breath. "He said after Heimdall sent me back here, you tried to kill Thanos."

No, he was protecting Thor and hoping to accomplish a diversion but Loki isn't going to say that. Bruce realizes that and continues. "It didn't work. Obviously. He couldn't get to you."

"Is there a reason your making me relive this nightmare?" Loki hisses. "I just woke up. Give me the decency of orienting myself."

Bruce ignores him, deep in thought. "But before he could kill you, some guy appeared." That gets Loki's interest and Bruce sees it. "So, you do remember."

"What I remember," Loki hisses, "is getting strangled and as I was dying some man saved me."

"You didn't know him?"

"Should I have?"

Bruce shrugs again, clearly nervous. "I don't know. Thor said he knew you. Acted like he did. Said he never saw anyone treat you the way that guy did save your mother."

Loki winces at the mention of Frigga. He tries to shake his head and the pain in his neck explodes. Loki grits his teeth, anger filling him. "I don't know who that was," he hisses, "I thought he was a dream. I don't know what happened. I don't-"

"Loki." It's Thor. Loki has to turn his whole body to see his brother while Bruce simply turns his head. Thor is pale and Loki would say it's from worry if he didn't have the face of a man who looks like he's seen a ghost.

"Thor," Loki says. Loki has seen Thor a handful of times since waking up. Always with a frown, always tired. It was a touching wake up call though. Thor was in tears, clinging to him the first time, thanking the norns for saving him. To say Loki wasn't touched would be an understatement. He thinks they cried more than spoke for that first moment. The arguing over the tesseract and Thanos came later. Now Thor knows more than Loki ever wanted him to know.

"You have a visitor," Thor says almost numbly.

He steps aside and through the door comes a man at least half a foot shorter than Thor in a blue suit. Now Loki feels it, too. The sick, confused and nostalgic feeling that comes with a ghost.

The man with silver hair and mustache stands before Loki, a big grin on his face and eyes twinkling like he just got crowned King.

"Hi, Loki," he says, and even if Loki never heard the words the man on the ship said, the tone and vibrations match with this man's.

It's him. It's the man who saved Loki.

**********************************

It's not the man who saved Loki.

He claims to be of Earth and never has been to space but Loki and Thor are having their doubts. They saw that man. They know what he looked like so how is this man here? They don't understand.

Despite this, Thor and Bruce leave them alone after a brief discussion in the corner where Loki can't hear. When they are gone, the man grabs a chair from the corner of this little med room and sits by Loki's bed, his grin still plastered on his face.

Loki is leary of him. He's too bright and happy. There must be more to him than that. Something he's hiding. The man sticks out his hand to Loki as if sensing his unease. "I'm Agent Don Wolferson by the way."

Loki looks at his hand but doesn't shake it. That doesn't seem to phase the man. In fact, he seems to be expecting it. He lowers his hand and opens his file. Loki sees his face from when he was in prisoned by the Avengers looking up at him.

"Let's see, you are Loki... Odinson or laufeyson? I've heard it both ways."

Loki scowls, "Technically both. But...Friggason. She raised me more than either of them." It feels good to mention Frigga, even if it's to a weird human.

This man, Don Wolferson (what kind of name is that) just nods, humming as he writes on the sheet.

"Right, right. Thor mentioned that."

Loki frowns. "How would Thor know to call me that? He doesn't know everything about me."

Don looks up. "No. He doesn't. That's why I'm here."

"You didn't state directly why you are here."

"I am here for you," he says quite friendly, and quite directly, "I want to help you stay on Earth and with your brother. This case with Thanos has already helped. I mean blowing up New York is not helping your case at all but, again," he winks at Loki, "that's why I'm here."

"To...help...me," Loki says unsteadily.

"Yes, sir," Agent Wolferman replies.

"Why?" Loki says with as much aggression as he can muster.

None of this is making sense. Why is this man helping him? Loki attacked his world. Invaded and killed his people. He shouldn't want Loki here.

Agent Wolferson sits back, his smile fading a little bit. "You want the truth?"

Loki nods and his neck pulses with hot pain, cutting off any words he had. What else would I want, the fool. Loki thinks.

Agent Wolferson sets down his pen and slowly his demeanor turns from fun and happy to serious and calming. "Well, I was in New York when you attacked. I was supposed to be getting married to this gorgeous woman I knew in high school."

Loki can already see where this is going. He grips his blanket, feeling a tad sick. "My whole family was here. We wanted a Manhattan wedding. And then the sky opened. All your buddies came through. We had to run." Wolferson shrugs. "I'm the only one who got out."

A marriage of all things. A new chapter in life. This man should loathe Loki. "I suppose," Loki says slowly, "I should say I'm sorry."

"Don't be," Agent Wolferson says, throwing his hands up and shrugging again, "I don't remember it."

Loki goes cold. "I...you...what?"

"I don't remember it. Any of it. My fiance, my brother's, my life. Blank slate," he waves his hand as if erasing a slate. "Fury found me wandering around. I guess they were looking for those deeply impacted by the attack. I was staying with my friend Verity Willis at the time. He asked me about what I remember. " Agent Wolferson pops his lips, making Loki jump. "Nothing. So he recruited me. Blank slates make good agents I guess.

"They kept telling me what happened. Why I should hate you."

"You should," Loki says, "I butchered your family. Whether you remember it or not, it is fact."

"But I don't," Agent Wolferson presses, "That is why I'm here. I'm in the perfect position to help you. Besides," he smirks again, "I want to understand you. Why you did what you did. Who you are: what makes Loki tick."

Loki feels his defenses come up. If he could turn away, he would. "You know nothing."

"I'd like to learn."

It's a simple statement. Clear and to the point. It makes Loki uneasy.

Agent Wolferson puts his pen and file to the side then says, "Look, I don't expect you to like us. Heck, I don't expect you to like this planet. But as long as you're here I want to help you. Give you a chance to make a new life as long as you are here. You don't have to like me-"

"Good. I don't-"

"-but you have to be here at least until you heal. So...can I work with you, and to a lesser extent Thor? Just for a little while?"

Loki glares at him. He wants to work Loki's case with Thor so Loki can stay here and start new Asgard with his brother. A human that might as well be dancing with his family's murderer.

Agent Wolferson is going to betray him. There's no way the man wouldn't. This is his chance to do so. Pay back for the family he 'doesn't remember.' But Loki can't understand what this payback is supposed to look like. If Agent Wolferson wanted to kill him, he could do it right now. So maybe it's emotional manipulation, convince Loki he cares and then stabs him in the back.

But unfortunately, the man is right. If Loki wants to stay with Thor, if he wants to get out of this Tower alive, he needs more than Thor on his side. Loki needs someone, a human, to convince the world he can be with his brother. Maybe it's crazy. Maybe it's stupid. But Agent Wolferson is, for a lack of a better term, Loki's salvation. A god needing such assistance from a human...how low he has fallen.

Loki stares at the ceiling, thinking this over before finally looking at the man again. "What do you need? Where do we start?"

Agent Wolferson's full smile returns. "Well, first off, call me Don."

Chapter Text

It's another week until Loki is released from the hospital or whatever room he is in. A little med unit maybe. Either way he is there for another week getting interrogated by Fury and by Barton and some guy who claims he controls ants and just about every Avenger who is 'not on the run.' It shocks Loki to learn that Captain America is on the run and S.H.I.E.L.D. had an upset a few years back though if he were to be honest, them falling to Hydra makes sense for such a cocky agency. Bureaucrats. They know nothing about anything.

At that Wolferson always laughs. He's the one who told Loki all of this like they were friends instead of enemies. As if he likes Loki and this wasn't just a job. Fury must have had him hand picked. He's very deceiving, too kind and too smart, to act like he does toward Loki.

Their first court date was yesterday. Loki can still barely speak but Wolferson took the bulk of it, talking about recuperation and community service. This was before a council of Earth's leaders. He spoke boldly, using Loki's injury, Asgardians and brother as evidence and witness. They agreed to visit this case again in a couple weeks when Loki could speak for himself and they could be sure agent Wolferson wasn't being mind controlled with a real judge and prosecutor.

Which leads to today with Loki lying on his bed in his cell of a room, itching the cast around his neck. He wants to rip it off and throw it out the window but he knows it'll just bounce back.

He is in sweats and a button-up, hardly proper when Wolferson knocks and sticks his head into the room. "Knock, knock," he jokes.

Loki glares, "Don't tell me we have something else to work on now."

"Nope," he comes all the way in and Loki sees that his suit coat is undone and there is a lack of a tie. He squints. This is not a formal visit. But Wolferson does bring his suitcase indicating they are doing something. "I thought since you'll be here for a while we could introduce you to some human culture."

Loki struggles to sit up against the headboard. "That is completely unnecessary."

"Why? Are you planning on leaving anytime soon?"

"No, but-"

"Then you need to get cultured." Loki rolls his eyes. The last thing Loki wants to do is learn about human life. But Wolferson puts his suitcase by Loki's legs and pops it open. "Now I understand why you're hesitant. A lot of human-made stuff is trash and fades away fairly quickly, but there is one thing that will never fade and be forever superior."

He promptly holds up a poster of a man on some contraption skidding across the water. "Ew," Loki says.

Wolferson looks somewhat offended. "It's a jet ski. Jet skis are man's best friend."

"It's on the water. I hate water." Loki doesn't mention it fizzles out his magic. It might give Wolferson ideas.

But Wolferson waves that away, "Poppycock! Once you get on one of those, all your fears will flow away."

"I highly doubt that."

"And look! Look!" Wolferson points to the bottom of the poster where a man stands next to a small box of text. Loki has to squint to see it's a younger blonde version of Wolferson. "That's you?"

"Apparently," Wolferson says proudly, "love is something not even amnesia can take away. Like love for jet skis."

"Your poor family," Loki snarks but Wolferson ignores him and reaches back into his suitcase.

"Look. There's also-" he pulls out a handful of wrapped individual pieces that look like a cone if cones had a flag coming out the ends of them. Loki looks at him confused. "Candy! Thor said you guys don't know what candy is. So here," Wolferson unwraps a piece and outcomes a brown drop. "Try one."

Loki wrinkles his nose. "What is it?"

Wolferson sits on the edge by Loki's hip, still holding out the pieces. "A kiss. Try it."

"That's a stupid name for something you eat," Loki growls. He eyes the piece and Wolferson sighs.

"I didn't poison it. Promise."

"Says an agent of the place that lies," Loki snaps, snatching the pieces from him and shoving them in his mouth. He starts chewing and Wolferson stops him.

"No, no! Slowly. Savor it."

Loki glares but does so. Slowly a sweet taste covers his tongue. It tastes...delectable. Like nothing Loki has ever had. Slowly the name comes to his mind. Chocolate. It's chocolate.

Wolferson chuckles, "There's more where that came from."

Loki scowls, "It's atrocious."

"Uh-huh. Next up-!"

For the next little while, Wolferson shows Loki toys, roller skates, different candies and holiday decorations. It's all very confusing until he pulls out the last three objects. Movies. Wolferson grins. "I thought we could watch it together."

"Excuse me," Loki says.

"Jarvis," Wolferson suddenly calls out.

"Yes, sir?" Loki jumps at the automated voice.

"Play the movie..."he pauses, then looks that Loki expectedly, "which one do you want to watch?"

Loki looks at him in surprise. This man is really serious about watching a movie with him. He looks at the three. "None."

"Come on. Just one movie and if you hate it, we'll never watch another one again. Promise."

Wolferson tilts his head, big eyes pleading. It's...dangerous. Loki looks at the three movies. The one with the alien and it's glowing finger looks insulting so no. The guy sitting on a bench? No, he'd rather not.

That leaves...

***********************

"...Mawidge! Mawidge is what brings us together today!"

"I can't believe I chose this," Loki groans, about ready to throw hands with a movie he can't stand.

"Princess Bride is a classic. It's a must see before you die," Wolferson says, stuffing his face with popcorn.

"Is this the one you would have chosen?" Loki hisses.

"I would have chosen Forrest Gump but this isn't a bad one, either."

"The one with the man on the bench," Loki says skeptically.

"It's more interesting than you think it is."

Wolferson shoves more popcorn in his mouth. Loki rolls his eyes and continues to watch the men fight and save the princess and the story is over. Quick, easy, not so painless. As the credits roll, he turns to Wolferson, but the man is asleep.

Loki feels his jaw slacken. Wolferson is fast asleep on his bed, in his room. Loki could kill him right now. How could he not think of that?

But as Jarvis turns the movie off, and the room goes into silence, Loki stares. The stares and stares until his eyes begin to dry. Most people look younger when they are asleep and Wolferson is no exception. For the first time, Loki sees the dark circles under his eyes and he realizes...maybe Wolfson needs to sleep. Maybe this is the only place he can sleep.

It still does not make sense to Loki and only adds to his suspicion that this man is not sane. But watching him makes an odd feeling bubble up. A feeling of wanting to be wanted and vice versa. The want of acceptance and belonging.

Loki shoves it down as soon as it comes up because this is an accident. He needs to wake Wolferson up and tell him to leave. But he can't. Every time Loki reaches for him, he stops.

Loki doesn't want to be alone.

So, instead, Loki decides to accept this acceptance and borrow into his bed beside Wolferson. It's far too easy to go to sleep with Wolferson when he could kill Loki just as easily.

Loki sleeps quite lightly so when the bed eventually moves, well into the night, he wakes up. He sees Wolferson quietly closes briefcase and move to the door. Before he can leave, Loki says, "Why?"

Wolferson stops. "I thought you were asleep."

"Why did you do this? Really?"

Wolferson turns to Loki, the moonlight making his eyes shine. "I wanted to spend time with you."

That makes Loki even more confused. It makes his heart beat way too hard and his thoughts race way too fast. "How could you just want to spend time with me?"

Wolferson chuckles, and shakes his head. "Good night, Loki."

Then he's gone.

****************************

"His throat is swollen but it should go down in a few days."

The woman jabs her finger into Loki's throat again and he coughs. He thinks she is trying to kill him from the malicious look she's giving him and the constant tightening and loosening of her hands.

Loki finally has that stupid neck brace off. It sits on the table beside him as the doctor needles his neck like it's a piece of meat she needs to pulverize.

Thor stands behind her, watching intensely. His hair is starting to grow again and it makes him look like a cockatoo. Loki had said as much that morning and Thor gave him a good bruise on his arm for that one.

"So he'll be able to speak? Go places? Be his normal self," Thor asks.

"Not that I can go anywhere," Loki mutters.

"Yes," the doctor grumbles, "he will be sore for a while but time will fix that."

Loki rolls his eyes. In his peripheral, he sees the door. His eyes are drawn to it. He waits for it to open. It doesn't.

The doctor suddenly yanks him back around and it takes all of Loki's self-control not to shank her. "Stop turning!" She hisses.

Loki glares until he notices Thor his studying him. Loki ignores him and focuses on keeping the panic that she'll choke him from getting to him or his disappointment.

When the doctor is done turning Loki's neck into a stress ball, Thor and he walk down to Stark's kitchen. Thor looks abnormally comfortable in jeans and a sweatshirt. Loki prefers his leggings and green turtleneck but as he walks by Stark's workers who stare at him, not at his head but elsewhere, he starts to wonder if that was a good idea.

They ride the elevator to Stark's flat and as they do, Thor states what Loki has been dreading from him. "Who were you waiting for?"

"I don't know what you're talking about," Loki says.

Thor snorts, "Yes, you do. You looked at the door fifty times."

"Not fifty-"

"Enough times that the doctor threatened you and I noticed."

Loki rolls his eyes. "No one. This place is crawling with people who want me dead, so I-"

"You're waiting for Agent Wolferson."

Loki's jaw clamps shut. Thor sees it and he has a hard time not smiling. He doesn't comment on it much to Loki's relief but he doesn't exactly change the subject, either. "The humans are uneasy around him."

Loki snorts. "Of course they are. What sane man sits down and enjoys a movie with his killer?"

"You didn't kill him-"

"His families killer then."

"The point is," Thor presses, "he makes everyone an easy. He even made me uneasy at first. What if he tried to do something to you. He seems like a man who could get away with things. Just like you."

Loki frowns, "That isn't very nice of you."

"You know you don't-"

"I'm not talking about myself."

Thor looks at Loki in shock and quite frankly, Loki is, too. "You really like that man."

Loki looks away, "You don't know what you're talking about."

The elevator bings and Loki gets out, going straight for the kitchen. Thor follows him and within minutes they have ale and peanut butter sandwiches set in front of them. Loki is starting to understand why Wolferson always brings him them. They are quite easy to make. But as he bites in he realizes it doesn't taste quite right. He is missing something.

"Jarvis," Loki calls out, "where is the honey?"

"Gone, Mr. Loki," the voice replies back, "Mr. Wolferson used it all."

"What do you mean he used it all? For what?"

But Jarvis doesn't answer. Loki scowls and stuffs the sandwich in his face again. After a long moment, Thor speaks.

"You should have heard him defending you. He gave Strange quite a fight."

Loki swallows a bite of sandwich before saying, "What?"

Thor takes a big bite, making Loki wait for his reply. "Strange came in today to argue against you being here. He had a lot of good points." Loki rolls his eyes.

"Charlatan magician," he hisses.

Thor ignores that and continues, "He had a lot of people believing him, especially after he used the examples of the Space Stone and Coulson's death. The circumstances and plans that led to it.

"But then," Thor laughs, "Wolferson stood up. He gave Strange a sip of his own medicine with medical files and so much more. Said he got a second chance in Kamar-Taj. You deserve one, too."

Loki stops eating at that. He sets down the sandwich and stares at the table. Finally, he sighs and says, "I'm sorry about Thanos. About the space stone. All of it. We wouldn't have..."Loki chokes. Lost so many. That's what he wants to say.

Thor gets the idea and slaps a hand on Loki's forearm. "I'm mourn for those we lost." Tears and a broken tone tell Loki how hurt he is. Thor wipes his eyes and continues, "but I am happy you are not one of them."

Loki grabs his arm back. "Me, too." It's not totally the truth but Loki is glad that he's here with Thor, even if it's on Earth.

The brothers smile at each other before Thor moves on. "So what movie did you watch with him?"

Loki buries his face in his hands and groans, "Thor..."

*************************

"Hey, tall, dark and scary, we're having a movie night. Want to join us?"

Loki looks up from his awful book that is neither about mice or any particularly good men and glares, "What are you blabbering about, Stark?"

Stark stands in the doorway of Loki's cell/room, leaning against the frame like he isn't invading what little space Loki has. He is cleaning those weird specs he uses to do work with his shirt as he answers me.

"Since Thor is leaving for New Asgard tomorrow and won't be back until my wedding, we figured we'd have a movie night. You both are incredibly uncultured." He puts his glasses on and smiles, "so come on, lazy pants, let's bust a move and watch a movie."

"Stop calling me names," Loki hisses, "and no. Just because Thor knows practically nothing it doesn't mean I have to be dragged into your meaningless activities."

Stark raises a brow, "Wolferson will be there."

Loki blushes way too fast for this to be for his own good. "What does that have to do with anything?"

Tony shrugs, "Nothing." He starts to leave very, very slowly. "Just that he's all alone on that side of the couch. All by himself. Lonely with no one to sit with." He disappears. After a moment, Loki thinks he's gone until he yells and Loki nearly drops his book, "Did I mention alone!"

Loki slams the door shut with the a wave of his hand. Stupid humans.

Not a minute later Thor comes bursting into his room, his face pinched and sour. "You are not leaving me alone in this."

He marches to Loki's bed. Loki tries to roll away but Thor grabs his waist and heaves him off the bed. The blanket that was on Loki's shoulders slips over his head and there it hangs as he screams bloody murder. "Let me go, you oaf! Let me go, let me go, let me go!"

Thor carries him out into the foyer and takes a few turns before he plops Loki down on the couch and rips the blanket off him, making his hair staticy. Across from him, Stark's fiance sips a martini and glare's at him. Stark is by her then a man in the leg brace who also glares at him and a kid who looks at him in fascination.

"Did we seriously have to bring him, Tony?" the man in the brace growls.

"Come on, how's he going to acclimate to society if he doesn't socialize."

Loki whips to two cushions down where Wolferson sits. He's out of uniform in gray sweatpants and a white t-shirt. It's a strange sight. It makes Loki uncomfortable.

"He belongs in a cell-"

"He belongs with his people," Wolferson argues, picking up a can of Pepsi. "If they want to put him in a cell, that's their business, not mine." He takes a sip in his face sours, "I miss Josta."

Brace man nearly explodes, "You don't even remember what it tastes like!"

"But I bet it was good," Wolferson argues. The man rolls his eyes. Wolferson turns to Loki and smiles. "Hey, Lokes, welcome to movie night." He points at the brace man. "That ray of sunshine is Rhodey. Next to him is Peter."

The kid waves at Loki. "Hi, Mr. Loki."

The brace man, Rhodey, hits his arm, "Don't wave at him!"

"Calm down, Rhodes," Stark says, leaning back and tugging his fiance, Pepper, Loki thinks it was, to his side. "While he's here, we can try to be civil."

Pepper glares harder, "As long as he is."

Loki sneers at her. "Wonderful to meet you, too, Miss Potts."

"Oh, the serial killer is here, shall we get started?"

Loki looks behind Thor to a young girl with curly hair that comes up and sits down between Peter and his brother. Wolferson presses the can to his forehead, looking tired. "Hello, MJ. Wonderful to see you again."

"Don't you find it odd you're sitting next to someone who could use that can to slice your throat?"

Wolferson looks at the can, then looks at Loki. Loki feels sick and hot when his smile softens in his eyes shine. "I trust him."

Loki feels nauseous. So much so he has to look away.

There's a moment of silence before Peter says, "Well, that's good enough for me." He leans over the coffee table and stretches out a hand to Loki. "I'm Peter."

"Peter!" The girl, MJ yells and tries to pull him back.

Loki doesn't touch him, just nods. "Loki."

Peter stands and comes around the table. "Can I get a picture with you? My friend Ned will never believe me if I don't show him."

This time Stark and MJ protest but Peter is by Loki and holding up a phone before anyone can even move. He snaps a picture, or at least he does something with the reflective images of the two and then says, "Thanks. Ned's going to lose his mind."

"I think we all are," Rhodey groans, leaning back in his seat. As Peter is going back to his seat, Loki spots the grin on Wolferson's face.

"What?" Loki hisses at him.

Wolferson shrugs. "Nothing. He's just a good kid." Then he takes another drink.

"You're both insane."

"Or maybe," Wolferson leans toward him, "we see something the rest of the world doesn't."

Loki blushes again and turns away.

"Okay," Stark claps his hands, "now that we're all here let's get this party started. Point break, what movie do you want to watch?"

"Oh, norns," Loki moans, slumping back in his seat. Of course they let Thor pick.

Thor thinks for long, humming and hawing before saying, "Jane and I watched a film a while back that I never got to finish." He looks up and smiles. "Forrest Gump."

Loki's jaw drops. Wolferson chokes on his drink, the pop coming out of his nose. He starts laughing and the entire group stares at him as he curls into himself, shaking with laughter.

"What's wrong with Forrest Gump?" Thor asks, confused.

Wolferson wipes his face with a hem of his shirt and Loki can't help but notice the pudge of his stomach. He chokes, "Nothing. Nothing at all," he looks at Loki, a big grin on his face, "right, Lokes?"

Loki glares at him for a long moment before turning it to Stark, "Start the movie."

It's a long movie, but Wolferson is right. The movie keeps Loki locked in pretty well. It is about a man on a bench rehearsing his whole life story to all these people and honestly Loki feels that. No one stays for the whole story. They only get a part of it and move on. Only Forest doesn't shut down, he just keeps going

His childhood, his adulthood, Jenny's childhood and adulthood. It all seems like normal human relation stuff. Loki even calls the kid being his at the end of the movie.

What he didn't count on was the very ending of the movie where suddenly Loki is in the kids shoes as his mom dies and he has to deal with that. He's in Forrests shoes dealing with this grief and Loki's grateful the lights are out because he didn't handle it well.

And as Forest mourn's Jenny, Loki realizes something else. The feeling from the previous movie returns. He wants to be loved that way. The way Jenny was despite her mistakes and leaving Forrest and not being the best person. He wants a Forrest to his Jenny.

Loki looks over at Wolferson to tell him to keep his knowing smiles to himself but once again, he is asleep. As the credits roll, Loki gets a good look at Wolferson once more.

Forrest didn't completely understand Jenny's mistakes. Loki doesn't feel like Wolferson...Don...really understands his either. But Forrest always loved her, defended her. Even after she was dead. Even when she wasn't in the room.

Loki thinks back to his conversation with Thor about Strange and Wolferson arguing.

Loki is in trouble...isn't he?

The light switches on and Don stutters awake. "Oh," he yawns, "did I sleep through it again?"

He rubs his eyes as Tony and Pepper stand and Thor speaks to the kids and Rhodey. But Don just smiles at Loki, this dopey ridiculous smile and asks, "So, what did you think?"

Yep. Loki is in trouble.

Chapter Text

Court is not at all like what Loki expected. He did expect the handcuffs that make the humans feel safer. He did expect the TV cameras that document every movement, every expression he makes. What he didn't expect was a police escort, the crowds of yelling people then Don being the most pissed person out of all of them.

No one is allowed in the courtroom except the judge, the bailiff and the prosecutor and defender. Oh, and Loki. It limits people he could kill he supposes. Even if he could just blast that protective glass around the judge for fun.

The door behind him opens and closes and the bailiff that has been glued to his hip since the second he got here backs up. Seconds later, Don is sitting by him, the stench of rotting food permeating him. On his suit are stains. Fresh ones.

"What the-"

"Not now, Loki," Don grouses, opening his briefcase and pulling out a pile of papers. "This is the most crucial day of your trial yet. If one thing goes wrong, you are screwed."

Loki's eyes widen. "What do you mean?"

Don glare's at one of the TV cameras then holds up one of the papers, hiding their faces. "If you even blink wrong, and somebody takes it wrong, no matter what I say, you will be convicted. The jury is for the people, which is by no means wrong but if the people get any louder, you are dead."

He drops the paper, then scribbles something on his planner. That leaves Loki to ponder if he wants to be here or not. All he has to do is lift his middle finger and the Earth will explode. Then he'll be on his own again, floating through the universe... alone.

Loki turns to tell Don to not stress, if they lose it's okay until he notices one of the papers, half hidden, probably forgotten from how Don's scrambling around. There is red writing, big words and Loki can only see a few lines but he already knows what it is.

Loki grows cold inside. Anger, deep and unforgiving stirs. He grabs Don's arm and whispers in his ear, "Come back to Stark Tower after this."

Don looks at Loki, completely confused, "What?"

"How often has this happened?" Loki points at the note. Don pales.

"It happens all the time, Loki. I have bigger things to worry about."

Loki glares. How is Don throwing it away like this? "Well, then let me worry about it. I'm telling Stark-"

"Loki-"

"-and he will make sure you get a room in Stark Tower. And protection."

With that Loki crosses his arms and doesn't say anymore to Don, no matter how many times Don tries to brush it off. But Loki will say this: one more death threat against Don and he'll give Earth a real reason to fear him.

******************************

Loki's anger doesn't fade as the trial goes on. Stark comes in and testifies. So does Barton who is furious about it. He leaves no detail out, but that includes the space Stone and something he says catches Don's attention and before Loki knows it he has Barton wrapped around his finger talking about mind control and how the stone not only affected Barton but it also affected Loki, causing Loki to do things that he would never otherwise do. That's partially a lie if the Jotuns have anything to say about it.

But it catches everyone off guard, including Barton who seems to look at Loki with less anger and more weary eyes.

Thor was right. Don is amazing at his job. That's probably why people hate him so much. The whole thing is caught on camera while Loki's cuffed and watching. The judge looks bored until Don brings that up. Then he's looking at Loki, eyes narrowed. When Don sits, Loki whispers to him, "Is that judge harsh?"

"Judge Stone?" Don asks, "No. He used to do night court. He got promoted. How he got this case is anybody's guess. Your problem will be the jury."

"Isn't it supposed to be a jury of your peers?" Loki asks, "I have no peers here."

"Exactly."

"Mr. Laufeyson!"

Loki looks up. The prosecutor glares at him. He's an older man, gray haired but no wrinkles. Dan is what Don calls him. It's like yin and yang only Don and Dan. Don is a sweetie pie. Dan is a no nonsense Justice of the peace. Don says he has lunch with Dan every Tuesday. Loki can't imagine what a brute and a teddy bear have to talk about but when Dan looks at Don, he does it with respect so there must be some relation there. Nonetheless, Dan glares at Loki until he says "Yes?"

"Go to the stand please."

Loki looks at Don. 'He said please,' Don mouths. Loki sighs and drags himself and his cuffs to the little box next to the judge who gives him this wacky smile.

"You ever been to a Denny's?" He asks.

Loki frowns. "What?"

"Harry," Dan groans, "please, don't."

"You know, a Denny's," the judge continues despite the prosecutor's protests. When Loki still doesn't understand him, the judge looks at Dan. "Hey, come here."

Dan looks almost in tears. "Please, Harry, just do your job."

But the judge leans over and in a whisper ask Dan, "Do you think they'd let us take this guy to Denny's? I want to shake. And maybe some fries."

Loki stares. He can't decide if the judge being this loose about everything is a good thing or not. Dan stares, too, until he says, "Harry, we will get food with Christine when we get this done. Can you at least act serious for another fifteen minutes?"

The judge looks at the cameras then at Dan. "I should have stayed in night court." He leans back and smiles at Loki again. "Don't worry. I'll tell them to get you a shake, too."

By the Norns he's in a court full of clowns. Loki looks at Don, but he's just smiling. The only serious one is Dan who comes to Loki's bench and says, "Mr. Laufeyson, care to answer a few questions for me?"

"I suppose," Loki hisses.

"Mr. Wolferson has stated," He suddenly stops and glares at Harry who is staring at Loki. Dan continues but doesn't look at his victim, "that you were mind-controlled into attacking New York." Suddenly Dan slaps the side of the judge's box and the judge startles. "Stop staring," Dan hisses.

"It's an alien, Dan," Harry growls, "how often do you get to interrogate an alien."

Dan rolls his eyes and turns back to Loki. "He also stated that you were under the thumb of a tyrant. Is all this true?"

Ah, to the serious parts. Loki leans back, trying to relax and not let the overwhelming memory of Thanos's fingers around his throat choke him. "Yes. It is true."

This goes on for a while. Loki describes Thanos, his neck injury, how the stone works and how that enabled him to be in others heads while simultaneously having complete monsters in his. Don looks pretty happy with everything. When it's his turn to ask questions and Dan is done glaring at Judge Stone who keeps chewing on a pencil, he asks Loki, "Loki, Mr. Laufeyson," Loki winces and he sees that Don regrets it but keeps going, "if you were to be free what would you do with that freedom?"

That's a loaded question. Loki sighs and says, "Live in New Asgard with my brother. Rebuild our people. Our culture. I have no qualms against humanity. Some of you are quite fun. I do not mind staying on Earth. It is a good place for my people." He hears Judge Stone hum as if an approval and Dan grump in disapproval. "But," Loki adds and Don tenses, "there's some humans who have threatened people I care about." Don's eyes widen but he doesn't turn away. Loki looks in his eyes and says, "It's because of them I would do any harm. No more. No less. If I leave this planet, leave my people and my brother, it will be for that reason and that one alone."

A new tension has taken over the courtroom. Loki looks up at Judge Stone who is looking at Don with a knowing look. So, he knows about them, too. Loki wonders if he receives letters as well. He looks at Dan. The prosecutor is gripping his pen tightly.

Don takes a deep breath. "That is all, your honor," then he goes and sits.

Judge Stone stares for a moment before grabbing his gavel. "Case dismissed until a further date. He thumps it and Loki relaxes. It's far from over but at least today is done.

************************

"Is there something wrong with that judge?"

Don and Loki walk, several officers and S.H.I.E.L.D. operatives surrounding them, heading for the exit. It took a while but after bodily refusing to let Don leave the building alone he finally relented and said he talked to Stark or Fury about some protection. So now they walk towards the double doors to the armored truck that will drive them to Stark Tower. There are rough hands on Loki's arms, making sure he doesn't get loose. He has to constantly look past the guard to see Don who is laughing at his query.

"Judge Stone? You could say that. He's just a fun guy. He likes practical jokes and tries to keep his courtroom light. He's always done that. He's your type of guy. Mischief makers."

"The fact that I'm a murderer doesn't unnerve him?"

The hands on Loki's arms tighten. Don shrugs, "He's seen a lot of cases. Compared to a lot of his most recent ones you're pretty docile."

"He doesn't seem like the type to do terrorist cases."

As they hit the doors, Don frowns, "No, but he's had his fair share of close calls." He looks at Loki as camera lights start going off. "Nobody likes a sympathetic judge."

Then there is yelling as the guards push through angry citizens and pushy newscasters. Something is thrown and a rock lands at Don's feet. Loki is not in control has he body slams the guard between him and Don, dragging the other with him until he's beside Don, covering him when something flies out from the crowd. Loki tunes out most of the angry yells and images present. He knows their anger is justified. Frankly, it would be better for everyone if Loki just left. And as a gunshot goes off and a stampede starts, he starts to actually consider it.

The guards shove them faster through the crowd. Loki blocks Don's whole body now as they try to get to the truck safely. Another shot goes off and Don ducks back into Loki. Loki wraps his arms around him, picking him up like a sack of potatoes and throwing him into the truck before climbing in himself. The humans are in a panic. This doesn't happen to them everyday. Odd what you get used to when you are with Thanos.

The truck takes off, with cops passing them to quell the crowd. Beside Loki, Don hardly looks ruffled but his sweat tells another story. "That was close," he mutters.

"And you wonder why I want you at Stark tower," Loki snarks.

For once, Don does not argue with him.

////////////////////////////////////////

Tony Stark doesn't believe Loki when he explains why he dragged Don back to the Tower with him even though the TV is on to the days review of his trial, and especially the shooting. Loki has to steal Don's briefcase and show it to him before Stark takes Don into another room.

Once he is, that's when a man in blue robes and a red cape comes from the kitchen, one of Peppers pastries in hand.

Doctor Strange. So called wizard of the arts of whatever. Loki glares at him as he stops in front of him. He takes a bite before saying, "Third time on Earth and even more trouble than the first time."

"What do you want?" Loki growls, "I believe your piece in my trial has been said."

"As many points as I've made in your trial, it's not going to matter at all if Agent Wolferson keeps defending you like he is."

Something bitter hits Loki. "He's already paying for his defense. Are you threatening him to?"

Strange cocks his head, but the way his eyes widen let Loki know that he's touched a nerve. "No. I think Wolferson got hit in the head one too many times but the man is the least threatening person I know."

"Good," Loki says, shrugging past him, "I would hate to have to waste a dagger on you."

As Loki makes his way to the kitchen, Strange stops him with, "And you? Are you a threat to him?"

Loki wants to scream at him. He wants to throw a dagger and throw his corpse out the window. But he just clenches his fist. Of course he is a threat to Don. But Loki would never hurt him. Not intentionally. But then he remembers Frigga and the Dark Elves or Odin and his death. Thor, Sif... Earth. The TV flashes showing he and Don going to the truck while the shooting occurs. Three died because of this. Because he's on Earth instead of in Asgard's prison where he should have been.

Loki is a threat. He's a killer, whether he does it purposely or not. He can't just expect it to change just because he got his neck broke for Thor. Hiemdall still died. They lost half of their people. All because Loki was greedy and wanted the tesseract. He should have let it blow up with Asgard.

Loki unclenches his fists, slumping. He feels defeated, weak. Who is he to think being... friends? allies?... with Don will lead to anything good? Slowly, mumbling, he says to Strange, "If I ever am, do as you must."

Strange doesn't follow him as he leaves the room.

*****************************

Loki is weak. That is no question. He let a human who is giving him his time just cause it's his job capture his attention. He let him drug Loki into believing he cares and he might actually, just a little bit, might like Loki.

Here's the kicker. Loki wants this ridiculous mortal to like him. He wants Don to shower him with attention and gifts and food and all his weird interests. Loki wants him to talk to him until his voice is gone, and fall asleep watching a movie with him. Loki wants Don. Loki wants Don to like him. He wants Don to accept him.

If that isn't pathetic Loki doesn't know what is.

Don sent Bruce and Strange to get his stuff. Stark convinced him to stay. Saying thank you to him for that was absolutely dreadful but the man just smiled and asked Jarvis to make sure security is up to date.

It's been about a day now. The news is still running the story. It's a mess. Loki feels guilty but he won't let it show. Not in a million years. And he's been given a ankle bracelet so he doesn't have to have a baby sitter all the time. Which means no more Avengers but less Don.

So Loki sits in the kitchen, missing Thor oddly enough. Peter, that kid from movie night, keeps looking at him as he eats a bowl of cereal. After a couple of minutes of trying to ignore him while spinning his spoon around in his soup, Loki growls, "What?"

Peter takes another spoonful of cereal before saying, "Sorry. You just seem really different from the guy who tried to destroy New York."

Loki scowls. "Well, that was years ago. People change."

"Yeah, but," Peter stops and thinks for a moment, "I don't know. You don't seem to like us still. So you must still like want to destroy us or something."

"Did Stark put you up this?" Loki asks, finally putting a spoonful in his mouth afterward.

Peter shrugs, "No. I'm just curious. Is there anywhere on Earth you like?"

Loki looks down. What an odd question. He drinks a few more spoonfuls then says, "Paris. I always found it..." Romantic. Quiet. Radiant. "Interesting."

Peter nods. 'Yeah. I always liked London. I might go there someday. We'll see."

Why is this kid talking to him? "Don't you have a girlfriend you have to go languish in gifts or something?"

Peter actually pauses at that, then abruptly stands sending his cereal flying. "Crap! I forgot it's MJ's birthday tomorrow. I was going to make her breakfast and I don't have any eggs!"

Loki frowns. "Breakfast?"

He ejects an icky goo from his wrist and pulls his jacket from the couch to him. "Yeah. She likes eggs and French toast."

"That's your gift to her," Loki asks, about to call it pathetic.

But Peter just shakes his head as he stuffs on his shoes, "Well, no. It's a show of appreciation. Didn't your parents ever make breakfast for the other?"

Loki scowls, "No. We had servants that did that."

"Oh." Peter actually looks put off by that. "Well, I guess that's a normal people thing. Anyway see you later, Mr. Loki." Then he's running out to the landing pad and jumping off, disappearing into the city below.

Strange child. He's going to get himself killed one of these days. But Loki does think about his words. Breakfast. As a show of appreciation...

There's only one problem with that.

What does Don like to eat?

*******************************

Loki pays a lot of attention to human eating habits over the next several days, including Don's. It's filled with the most unhealthy foods, but when Loki points out to Don that he's eating way too many sweets and it's going to kill him, Don points to the chocolate fountain in Loki's room and tells him to shut up before promptly stuffing another donut in his face.

Despite all that Loki gathers the information he desires quite easily. The majority of humans like something hot to drink when they wake up in the mornings. He decides hot chocolate is the best course to take as Stark seems to love his coffee and since Loki has never made a pot himself it would be best not to try and end up with Stark killing him in his sleep for breaking it.

Humans also like a variety of foods for breakfast. From hot and cold grains to fruits, from sugary items to breaded items, there are choices galore. Loki decides on a couple items that might suit Don's fancy. A fruit plate, for one. That is Loki's choice as Don needs to eat more fruit than sugar. He knows how to make a delectable fruit plate. If Don isn't awed by Loki's decorative talents, he will formally declare humans have no taste.

After looking up several recipes on how to make waffles, pancakes and french toast, Loki ultimately decides pancakes would be the best choice. Waffles could easily be made by a waffle maker. He's looking to show his appreciation through time, not easy cooking. French toast is too complicated. Too many things that could go wrong. Pancakes are straight forward.

The night before Loki puts his plan into motion, he asks Jarvis to awake him an hour before Don has his alarm set so Loki may be fresh as he cooks the mans breakfast. Jarvis is more than willing but Loki doesn't appreciate the ungodly time it is when Jarvis turns on his lights and tells him it's time to get up.

Loki glares at the clock as he goes and brushes his teeth. 5:30 a.m. What's sane man gets up before the sun. Don better appreciate this breakfast or Loki will push him down the stairs. It's odd as he gets ready, how focused he is on making sure his hair is curlier than normal and it's not greasy. Don seems to like the curls. He bounces them whenever he can. Father...Odin never liked them. Probably because no one has a real curls in their family. Loki has to keep face and all that. But Don... Loki doesn't finish that thought.

He magic's on some khakis, black and tight as well as a white dress shirt that has lost it's two top buttons and its sleeves are rolled up. Also very tight, leaving nothing to the imagination.

Its 6:00 by the time Loki gets to the kitchen where he looks at the appliances and says to Jarvis, "Jarvis?"

"Yes, Mr. Loki," the computer says louder than he would like.

"Get me a recipe for pancakes and hot chocolate."

"Right away, sir."

As Jarvis does that, Loki opens the fridge to all the fruit he made that Agent Happy buy the other day. Bananas, oranges, grapefruits, grapes and strawberries are instantly moved to the cupboard where begins to cut them and put them on a platter. Loki is half amazed that they let him graduate from plastic knives to normal knives. Maybe they are starting to trust him after all. That's not the greatest plan. No one should trust the God of Mischief. But he's not going to complain. As long as he doesn't have to break another plastic knife as long as he lives.

Not long after, Jarvis pulls up on a small screen by the oven a recipe for rich hot cocoa and chocolate chip pancakes.

Loki puts the milk and half and half on first, using up the small carton of half and half. As it heats up, he mixes the pancake mix and uses his magic to continue cutting the fruit. He looks at the clock. 6:15. This will not do. He puts the heat on high for the grill and pot, putting small pancakes on the grill before returning his full attention to a strawberry.

Loki is so immersed in this strawberry that when Jarvis speaks, he jumps. "Mr. Loki."

"What?" Loki snaps as he eyes the strawberry to make sure no unnecessary cut was made.

"The milk is overboiling." Its at that moment that a loud hiss fills the room. Loki whips to the oven where streams of milk are boiling over the pot and creating a horrid burning smell that fills the room.

"No! No!" Loki rushes to it and turns off burner but the milk is already down to the bottom, barely enough to drink, the rest burned into the oven. Loki curses. Okay. Pancakes and fruit aren't bad. But when he goes to the pancakes, each one is black, cooked through. He never flipped them. He hurries and puts the last bit of batter on the grill. He can still salvage this.

But when he looks at the fruit, he deflates. In his panic, Loki caused the knife to go faster, leaving small chunks of food everywhere. He looks at the clock. 6:30. He's too late. He can't fix this.

Something in Loki breaks and he can't breathe. He sits on the floor, back resting against the bar as the leftover milk bubbles, the pancakes burn and fruit juice trips off the counter. How's it possible that he's so powerful and yet he can't even make a simple breakfast? How is he this useless!

Loki is covered in pancake batter and fruit juice, sticky and not at all presentable. He looks... unworthy. Like the mess that fell into Thanos's hands. He is a mess. Everyone knows it. The whole Earth. Odin. Thor. Thanos. Asgard, too. His people haven't even spoken for him. They know the truth. Why would they want him back when all he does is destroy and kill? Why would anyone want him? He can't show appreciation. Unworthy villains don't show that. Only heroes do that. And he'll never be that...

He curls his arms around his knees and shoves his face into the gap, trying hard not to lose control and sob. He hates himself. Loki truly and honestly hates himself.

"Loki?"

Loki flinches. He doesn't uncurl, he doesn't dare to look up. He can't look at whatever look is on Don's face. He can already picture it. The disgust, the horror. He just can't.

Loki hear's the shuffle of Don's feet get closer to him. "What happened?"

"Mr. Loki tried to make you breakfast, sir," Jarvis suddenly says.

Loki's anger at himself explodes with that admission. "Shut up!" He howls as tears run down his nose and drop onto his pants.

Loki hears Don's feet stop at the counter then a warm body is next to his, groaning before he fully sits. Don takes a moment, maybe letting Loki get accustomed to his presence before he says, quietly, "You made me breakfast?"

Loki scoffs,"I didn't do anything, clearly." Anything except make a mess.

"I don't know," Don says, a happy, teasing tone in his voice, "this fruit is so immaculate I'd hate to take a bite out of it."

Loki peeks over his arm. Don has the strawberry he was cutting that led to this whole mess in hand, carved like a flower. He's gazing at it with awe and a big smile.

Loki sniffs, "That's the only thing that didn't get messed up."

Don doesn't say anything so Loki hides again. Of course it's a mess. It clearly is. You clearly can't argue that it isn't.

"Thank you."

Loki jerks up so fast his head bounces off the cupboard and Don is on him seconds later. "Are you all right!"

But Loki doesn't care about his head. "What do you mean thank you?"

Don is confused at Loki's sudden burst, his hands reaching for Loki's head, but focused on Loki's words. "I... you made me breakfast. Yeah, it's burnt to a crisp but you actually tried to do it," Don shows him the strawberry in emphasis, "It shows me you cared, Loki. More than a perfectly made pancake ever could."

Loki rubs his eyes, brushing away tears, "And hot chocolate."

"What?"

"And hot chocolate," Loki points at the disgusting pot, "It boiled over. There might be some left but I'm not sure."

Don looks at the pot. He grabs the cupboard to stand and goes to it. He smiles back at Loki after he looks into it as if the disgusting stench doesn't offend him, "I'd say about half a cup. You want some?"

It's an odd question to ask because there's so little left but before Loki can answer, Don has grabbed two small mugs, and put in the powder and the milk. He hands Loki the green mug, and Don takes the orange and they sit on the floor and drink it even though there's a weird film over it and the kitchen smells bad. It's relaxing, almost refreshing. Loki's starting to calm down with his little sips and the warm body so close to his. It's more comforting than it has any right to be. It doesn't change the fact he failed...again. But having someone who isn't angry about it...that seems to make all the difference.

As Loki finishes his drink, he turns to see if Don is done and pauses. There's a blank look on the mans face. His eyes look bruised. They look as if he got punched. He's pale. The cup is halfway to his mouth and he's staring at it, not moving.

"Don?" Loki asks quietly.

Don exhales slowly, but there is no reaction. "Don?" Loki repeats, touching his arm. Don jumps and Loki jerks back.

"Sorry," he says, rubbing his eyes, "I... don't know what that was."

"Are you okay?" Loki asks.

"Yeah, fine."

"You don't look well."

Don sighs. He takes a sip of the hot cocoa and stretches out his legs. "I've been... having these weird dreams lately." He pauses, thinking things over. Oh, Loki thinks. He's not sleeping over dreams, not death threats. It's not fear. Not present fear anyway. Loki stays silent as he thinks. "I can't remember them well. Just flashes. Faces. Blurry faces. But just now ... I think I had a flashback."

"A flashback?" Loki questions.

Don nods. "Yeah. It sounds strange but... I have cocoa all the time, especially in winter and I've never had a flashback and yet..."

He trails off and he seems to go blank again. Loki sets down his cup and tries to pretend like his hand isn't shaking. "What was it?" He asks.

Don shrugs. "A cafe, I think. Here in New York. I don't think it exists anymore. I got hot chocolate and was going outside to meet someone. But I don't know who it was."

Loki feels sick. Flashbacks. This is not good. "Do you think," Loki says so quietly he barely hears himself, "they are dreams and flashbacks to your former life?"

Don looks at Loki, a look of fear in his eyes. "I hope not."

That immediately relieves Loki and worries him. "Why?"

"It's not my life. Hasn't been for six years. What good would come from remembering?"

He would be saving himself from getting too close to Loki. Hating him would be better for Don. Safer. But Loki doesn't say that. "I don't know," he says instead, "maybe it would be easier to forget."

That doesn't change the fact that Don is remembering things. Something is triggering his memories. Is it Loki or all the evidence Don is looking at? Is it everything with court? It's Loki, isn't it? He's too blame for Don's lack of sleep. Loki would tell him to stay away but separating oneself from an addiction is not easy. And besides, Loki doesn't want to.

As Don drinks the last of his hot cocoa, something occurs to Loki. "I could help you sleep," he says. Don looks at him, curious. Loki swallows hard. "I can't stop flashbacks but my mother knew a spell to keep dreams away, to rest the mind. It's a tea. I can make it, do the spell and," Loki pats his head, "no more dreams."

"You don't have to do that, Loki," Don says rubbing his head, "you already have enough on your plate."

"You're not a burden, Don." Loki says it's so suddenly that he's shocked. They both stared each other in surprise. Loki hadn't meant to say that but there it is. He looks away his face hot. I want to help. I haven't used my magic for good in a long time. It would be... refreshing to do that again."

Don's gaze burns his face. Loki slowly looks at him from under his lashes and he melts. Don's gaze is so soft, gentle, thankful. And... dare Loki hope.. his gaze seems to caress Loki, something that hands would normally do.

"Thank you, Loki," Don says, "I would appreciate that." Loki's body heats up in a welcome burn that he hasn't felt in a long time. Not willingly anyway.

"Anything for you," Loki says. A frown creeps across Don's face but before he can say anything, a loud shriek pierces the air. Loki would almost say it was Pepper if not for the extremely strong smell of cologne.

"What happened to my kitchen!"

Chapter Text

Despite the fact that he's housing a criminal and half the city is on high alert for it, Stark decides to go through with his wedding and not only that, but make it even more grand by having it in the middle of central park.

That means all hands on deck when he decides to set everything up the day before and have the reception in his party lounge in the tower. So they call up a bunch of guards, slap an ankle bracelet on Loki and off they all are to Central Park to set up about a gazillion chairs, and alter, gazebo, bar and norns knows what else. Pepper and Don stay at the tower, setting up for tonight's reception. Tony, Rhodey, Peter and his friends and Loki spend hours at Central setting up. Loki grumbles for about ninety-five percent of the time.

About halfway through Loki's annoying brother shows up with a wind storm, knocking over all the chairs. Loki's happy to say he's not the only one who wanted to kill Thor that. Tony gave him a big lecture on etiquette. Not that Stark wouldn't do the same thing but that's just him.

But Loki would be lying if he said Thor didn't help get the job done faster. The chairs are back up soon afterward then they move on to the tables and that's when Thor stops him. "We need to talk," he says.

"Oh, norns," Loki grumbles, pulling out another large round table, "I didn't do anything horrible if that's what you want to bring up. It wasn't my fault Rhodey came in when I was practicing levitation."

"What?" Thor asks, looking to Rhodey who has a cut on his forehead.

"Like I said, nothing horrible," Loki says.

Thor shakes his head as he grabs his own table and they haul them to the center of a field. "I'm choosing to ignore that for now. No, I want to talk about Agent Wolferson."

Loki pauses, a cold feeling permeating his chest, "What about him?"

Thor puts down his table and nearly takes the legs off trying to unfold them. "Well, not him specifically. I've been meaning to talk to you about this for a while but-"

"Get on with it, Thor," Loki says, unfolding the legs to his table a lot calmer than Thor did his.

Thor runs a hand through his cropped hair before saying, "Agent Wolferson is an exact replica of the man who saved you on the ark."

Loki rolls his eyes. "We've already been through this. Agent Wolferson was never in space. The whole thing was a dream."

"But it wasn't a dream, Loki," Thor says so seriously Loki has to stop where he is and look at him. Thor has never told him what happened after Thanos snapped his neck. He just said he recognized Don, too, then closed up. But now he looks ready to talk while simultaneously being sick.

Loki sighs and levitates a few chairs to his table where Thor and he sit. "Okay," he says, eyeing MJ and Tony arguing by the altar, "tell me what happened."

Thor takes a longer moment to watch them as well and even longer before he speaks, a million and emotions crossing his face as he contemplates how to say this. Talking has never been their strong suit so this is awkward and it takes a lot in Loki not to pull some prank to ease tension.

Finally, he says, "I was trapped. I couldn't get to you no matter how hard I tried. How you looked when he was killing you," Thor runs a hand across his face, "it'll haunt me for the rest of my life.

"As he was about to end you, a door opened."

"A door?" Loki asks.

Thor shrugs. "An orange box. I assume it was a door because Agent Wolferson came through it but... It wasn't Agent Wolferson. Maybe it was a doppelganger?"

"Focus, Thor," Loki says, "stick to facts."

Thor shakes his head, "He was such a small human, but he attacked so quickly. He had a stick about yay big and the end glowed orange. He poked Thanos with it. That's all he did and he disappeared."

Loki frowns. "What do you mean disappeared? How can Thanos just disappear?"

"I don't know," Thor growls, frustrated, "He just disappeared. His minions were so shocked that their magic failed them and I got out. I managed to attack the remaining group but they were scattered, unsure. I took out two of them but the magic guy got away. When I turned back, this... man was holding you, saying something to you.

"The way he looked at you, held you, I could have sworn he'd known you for forever."

The memory returns full force of warm arms and a loving face and Loki has to look away from Thor and clutch his head. This isn't real. It can't be.

"Do you know what he said to me?" Loki asks.

"No," Thor says and the amount of disappointment that brings Loki is surprising. "When I reached you, he told me how to save you until we got help. Told me to get you to Earth as fast as I could."

He stops and Loki finally looks back at him. "What then, Thor?"

Thor shrugs, "I asked him who he was. Then he disappeared. Back through the door. Like he was never there at all."

"You're lying," Loki says, "there has to be more than that."

Thor clenches his fists. "He said you loved me and that was it. I have no answers, Loki! He came, he left."

Loki rubs his face hard. "Thor, do you have any idea how asinine that sounds."

"Why do you think I never brought it up?"

"So something that looks like Agent Wolferson shows up, makes Thanos disappear with a stick, proceeds to tell you what to do and then disappears through some orange door that just appeared out of nowhere."

The fact that Thor just shrugs and nods nearly takes Loki over the edge. "We are both delusional."

"Then how do you explain Thanos? Or the fact you are still alive? And why Agent Wolferson?"

"I don't know. Things happen, Thor. Maybe Thanos combusted from too much power. Wouldn't that be a miracle."

"What about a multiverse? Doctor strange was talking about that the other day." Loki stares at Thor. Is he serious? "Maybe he's from another universe. Another version of Agent Wolferson."

Loki can feel his face turning red in frustration. "A multiverse," he hisses, "what are you trying to get at here, Thor? Why are we talking about this?"

"What if this isn't a coincidence, Loki? Think about it. Some guy saves you. We get to Earth and Agent Wolferson comes and is your defense attorney and he looks exactly like the guy who just saved you. That's not a coincidence, Loki. It can't be."

"So, some cosmic dietey deemed that they're going to give me a chance with a human. Is that what you're saying?"

"It's not ridiculous, Loki. We both know there are higher and more powerful gods than us."

"The universe doesn't work like that for me, Thor. It never has."

Thor wants to argue. It's on the tip of his tongue when Tony stops by their table and says, "Bruce is on his way to the tower. With point break back we're going to send you back. That okay, Loki?"

"Dandy," Loki growls, standing.

Thor reaches for him. "Loki-"

But Loki is already gone, heading toward the guards and van surrounded by paparazzi. If a thunderstorm starts to roll in, that is not his problem.

****************************

Now that Thor has opened that can of worms, Loki can't stop thinking about it and it makes him mad. Agent Wolferson is not the man from the statesmen. Everyone knows it. But the idea of another version of him from another time and space coming there just to save Loki is preposterous and absolutely absurd. No ifs, ands or buts about it.

But what if it was true? How could the universe just waste some man like Wolferson from another world on Loki after everything he's done. That's why he doesn't believe it. Don is meant for beautiful wonderful people who can love and care for him properly. Not a monster who couldn't love someone correctly if he was given an instruction manual.

If Thor is right, then the universe has a horrible sense of humor.

The tower is full out decorated with shiny bulbs, lanterns, and greens. Not something he expected from 'Iron Man' but if it means Pepper is happy and not pushing him around like a goat then Loki's happy, too.

He's sitting on the stairs, watching Pepper, Don and that one agent, Happy, put decorations on the tables when Bruce comes and sits beside him.

"Guests are already arriving," he says, "Wong and Strange. Pretty sure that teen Tony met a few years ago is here. Harley I think his name was."

"And yet the engaged couple aren't even close to ready," Loki mutters.

"I think Tony just needed some time away before everything is official. I try to get him to call Steve but he wouldn't budge."

Loki frowns. Steve? "The icicle man? Captain America?"

Bruce nods. "Yeah. They had a falling out. I bet he'll be at the wedding though. There's no way Steve would miss this."

"Were they romantic?"

Bruce goes red at that question. "No. No, I don't think so. Well... not as far as I know-"

He stutters along while Loki cocks his head. There's more to this group than he realized. Bruce finally just clears his throat and says, "Anyway, Fury wanted to know if you're going to be at the reception tonight and wedding tomorrow. You know. Security reasons."

Loki rolls his eyes, "I would love to say no but Thor feels embarrassed because Jane dumped him and he doesn't want to be alone."

"That's fair," Banner says, "I don't have a date either. I'm surprised you're not going with Agent Wolferson."

Loki frowns. "What does that mean?"

Bruce is grinning as he points at Don. This is the first time Loki notices the drink in his hand that sloshes on his shoe. "You know. You and Don. The nice amnesia agent who has no taste in clothes but a great taste in food."

There is way too much to unpack there from how Bruce notices all of that to the implication of Don and Loki going to any party together.

"First off," Loki growls, "only I can say that stuff about Don. Secondly, he's not into men."

Bruce bursts out laughing and half his drink runs down the stairs. "Why is that funny," Loki hisses lowly .

"Dude." Oh norns, the hulk is drunk. "The man does not socialize unless you are there. Like work is the only thing that matters to him. Tell him you're going to movie night. Boom! He's there. You're at dinner? Boom! He's there. The fact he's even helping with his wedding is astounding."

"What does any of this have to do with me and Don romantically. People go to these things for someone else all the time."

Bruce takes in the rest of his drink then says quite plainly, "Look, Loki, the guy had a fiance at one point. That doesn't mean he doesn't like you. Just go for it. Don't screw up like the rest of us."

Then he's stumbling down the stairs, grabbing a couple fairy light centerpieces as he goes.

Loki looks at Don. Don spots him and smiles. He holds up one of the table covers and waves. He looks handsome in his tux. A tad uncomfortable but calm enough that he can hide it. His hair is a silver halo clashing with Stark's copper toned room.

That man was almost married once. Guilt fills Loki until... an idea pops into his head. He told Don that he is a little of everything but Don has never seen it before. Maybe tonight can be a first...

**************************************

Getting ready takes ten times longer than Loki expects but who could blame her. It's not every day you can dress up for somebody who actually likes you. She dresses like a human but does her hair as an Asgardian. She remembers when Don brought her a Norse mythology book and ask her to point out the truth and false of their culture. He pointed out many dress and hairstyles in the book so she knows what he likes.

She gives her hair as much volume as she can, letting it out to swish around her body and look like a mane. She adds gold ringlets through it and with it two small braids. She doesn't put too much makeup on. Don had made a comment one that he feels intimidated by makeup because he feels like it hides imperfections and that it hides the soul. Does Loki agree with that? No. But is she doing this for her? Also no.

Loki's body is a whole other statement. Frankly she hasn't had a time to analyze Don's 'type.' She doesn't know what form attracts him the most and frankly she's too scared to look up his file to look at his fiance to know. So she figures keep it good and round on bottom, luminously big on top. In her experience that is generally what people like. Perfect form. Big breasts. No imperfections. Once the size and shape of her body is figured out all that's left is the dress.

She goes through dozens of dresses, frustrated that each one feels like a bit too much or not enough. She curses herself for being attracted to such a plain man. People like Fandral were easy. Wear anything tight and he would be on you in two seconds. Don is not Fandral. Not even close. Norns knows if this will even turn him on let alone convince him he can love female Loki.

Loki pauses at that, staring into the mirror, naked and, if she must admit, afraid. If this did work and she convinced Don that he could love her, would she stay a female just for that? Would she stay in this form for a man who couldn't love all of her?

His fiance comes back to her mind. If Don forgot her, would any of this really matter? She doubled over, pressing her hands against the wall. How could she have let this go so far? To let some human who's only here to help her stay on Earth then disappear after worm his way into her heart. Something that could kill her just because of a little praise and attention.

But Loki has to try. The only way this will go away is if Don breaks her heart. Better to be let down now than later down the line. She stands straight once more and snaps her fingers. A black dress with gold highlights around the waist appears. There is a slit on the left side up to mid upper thigh. The top has no back, a diving vee down to her navel and straps that clip around her neck.

It leaves nothing to the imagination but at this point she's wondering if Don has one. It's one of the most revealing dresses she has ever worn. She's being pathetic but whoever said the goddess of mischief isn't petty.

When nine o'clock clock hits she makes her way to the lounge, eyes burning her as she goes. When Thor sees her, his eyes grow bigger than her breasts. "What on hellheim are you wearing?" He hisses in his tux that does not flatter him at all.

"A dress, Thor," Loki says, flinging her hair back, "this isn't new for you."

A couple of agents walk by, drooling. One trips over the railing to the stairs and nearly plummets to the ground.

"You can't wear that," Thor says.

"I'm not nine hundred anymore, Thor. I can wear what I please."

"Not to my friend's wedding your not!"

"Point break, I need you to- holy sh-!"

Stark comes around from behind Thor and gaps at Loki. She glares. "Is there something you need, Stark?"

Stark goes red, "Loki?"

"She was just going to change-"

"No, I wasn't."

Tony shakes his head. "Never mind. Pep and I are doing the speech in five. I want you at the end of the table by Banner. Loki," he stares if he doesn't know what to do.

Loki crosses her arms and glare's harder. Stark seems to start to sweat. "Stand wherever."

Then he rushes off down the stairs to the full dining room. Thor pushes her back toward her room. "Go change!"

Loki flicks her hair at him, hitting him in the face. "Blow it out your ear, Thor."

Then she goes down the stairs and into the crowd where waiters trip and women scowl, covering men's eyes and Pepper about trips out of her shoes.

Loki looks better than the bride and everyone knows it.

She spots Don by the windows to the left of the table. She beelines to him but almost stops and turns around when he just looks at her then away. Loki has to re-center. Maybe he didn't even recognize her. As she draws closer, she sees he's talking to Maria Hill. She looks at Loki and does a double take and not in a good way.

"Hi, Don," Loki says, fluffing her hair, making it bigger.

"What is this?" Maria asks in her flat black dress that seems to be getting more attention from Don than Loki is.

"Hi, Loki," he says, glancing at her, but not fully looking, "you look pretty tonight."

Loki frowns and raises a brow as he takes a sip of whatever drink he has in his hands. She stands straighter, making her breasts protrude more. "Does my female form bother you?" She asks so plainly she shocks herself. Maria Hill chokes on air. Don goes red.

"No, of course not." But he says that while not looking at Loki. Instead some blonde girl walks by and he looks at her and her pants suit. "You know I don't care about that."

Loki's anger is boiling. Why won't he look at her if he doesn't care then? Someone cat calls behind her and Don is suddenly there blocking her from the view of the rest of the party.

"Goddess of mischief, boys. She doesn't need you. Keep moving," he shouts much to Loki's confusion.

Loki turns as Maria puts her drink back on a passing platter and says, "I'm going to go sit. You coming, Agent Wolferson?"

Loki turns and looks at him. This is the first time he looks at her but not lower than her eyeline. There's a fire in his eyes. One she hasn't seen before. "No, I'll stay here. Go tell Wong hi for me, though."

Maria rolls her eyes and walks off. Loki shimmies just because she can and because maybe that'll make Don look at the rest of her. He doesn't. Instead he takes a long drink of whatever he has in his cup.

To be honest Loki is insulted. She has the whole room staring at her and the one person she wants to look at her won't. So much for seduction, hello another lonely night. Maybe Don is asexual. But still asexuals can look at people. The least he could do is that.

Don drinks the whole cup then says, "I hate weddings," before chucking the cup in the garbage can by the corner wall.

Loki frowns. "Why?"

But before he can answer, Stark is hitting his glass calling everyone's attention. From there is a long speech between him, the groomsmen, and Pepper and her bridesmaids. It's long. So long.

And Don and Loki stand there watching, Don getting increasingly agitated and fidgety while Loki gets more angry. He won't look at her even when he's bored. Never mind being bored. He won't look at her period so he must not like her as a woman.

And as this anger reaches a boiling point during Thors speech, she whisper growls to Don, "Either there's something wrong with me or something seriously wrong with you."

Don starts at that. When he looks at her, he looks dazed, "What are you talking about?"

Loki jiggles again and her breasts sway. Don looks away. She barely registers her hands turning to fists.

"Literally everyone in this room is looking at me, but you-"

"Are you seriously comparing me to half people in this room that want to see you hang from the nearest tree?"

"You refuse to look at me. I understand if you are asexual but not looking at me in this form is uncouth. That must mean you don't like me as a female."

"That's not it!"

"Then what!"

Don is turning red again, but his eyes are stormy. "I'm being respectful."

Loki wants to scream at that. Is he being serious? "Respectful? You're avoiding me. My assets are-"

"There's plenty of men you can woo, Loki," Don says, scanning the room. The nerve! He thinks Loki's just doing this for attention! Because she wants sex! Some one night stand! How dare he! "You don't have to convince me-"

Loki explodes, screaming and grabbing her boobs, shaking them at Don, "I made my boobs this big for you!"

Thor stops talking. The whole room turns to their little corner and stares. Some in anger, some in jealous lust. Don goes even more red. Loki drops her breasts, her face going hot. She can see the wedding table glaring at her. Don steps forward as she steps back, covering her eyes, getting in place, just as she's always done. Don covers her with his body sheltering her from prying eyes. It takes everything in her not to shove him.

Don waves back to Thor and says, "Ignore us. Please continue, Thor. You were giving a lovely speech."

Thor, now just as red as the two of them, does continue through gritted teeth and eyes that never leave Loki or Don.

Loki hasn't been this ashamed since she was a free Asgardian prince.

When Thor is done, Loki pushes past Don and speed walks to the bar. She shouldn't be here. She never should have thought this was a good idea. She made a fool of herself. Don clearly doesn't want her. He's immune to her. Or maybe he really has been lying to her all along.

She drinks one, two, two and a half drinks before some man appears. A S.H.I.E.L.D. agent whose eyes only leave her figure for a second. He stares for a long time, looking like some hungry dog.

"What?" Loki hisses.

The man cocks his hip and leans on the bar. Ah. He wants something. Of course he does. "That guy you were yelling at. He doesn't appreciate you," he says, voice low and husky.

For some reason that hurts more than it should. No. He does doesn't does he. "So," she hisses, "what does it matter to you?"

The man's breath smells of alcohol. He was probably drinking all through the speeches.

//////////////////////////////////

"I can appreciate you," he coos, eyes on her breasts and hand drifting to her thigh, "I'll give you everything you ever need."

She wants to drown in alcohol. That's what she needs. But she also wants attention. She can't get that from Don. He won't give it to her. Maybe Loki can mask this man and pretend. Isn't that what she's done in the past? But as soon as she faces the man she feels sick. No. She's let her heart go to someone who doesn't want it. She can't do this to Don. She can't.

"Go away," Loki hisses.

"Oh, come on, god of mischief," he slurs, "let me help you forget him."

Suddenly he's on her, slamming her back into the bar, tripping her with a hand on her thigh, the other on her waist and his mouth on hers, tongue insistent, exploring her mouth. The hand on Loki's waist goes to one of her breasts, pulling it out and squeezing.... in front of everyone. A slut. He's turning Loki into a slut in front of everyone. Making her look bad in front of everyone.

Loki pushes him but his grip is tight. "Stop!" Her hands start glowing green as he tries to go for her neck, squeezing tighter, hurting. Her tears are rolling down her face now. Why is no one helping her?... Because no one cares... Then she'll ruin her chances of staying here because she'll kill this man and-

"Hey!"

Suddenly, the man is gone, saliva trailing his mouth, and Loki's boob left and exposed for everyone to see. Before her is Don pulling the agent back and before her eyes he upper cuts the agent, sending him tumbling to the floor. People scream.

Don is red, eyes on fire, teeth bared as he yells, "Don't you ever touch her that way again!"

Then he's looking at Loki and the fire disappears. She shoves her breast back in her dress clumsily under his eyes. She thought she fell in love with a flower. No, she fell in love with a dragon.

$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$

"Are you okay?" He asks, taking off his jacket and putting it around Loki. She's enchanted as she reaches for his face until Don is whipped around and the man's fist launches Don into the counter.

"Get out of here, old man! You lost your chance!"

Then her fire is back. "How dare you!" The man is surprised as Loki kicks him in the balls and gives him a good right hook. By now a whole crowd is surrounding them. Loki's back to Don instently and peels him off the counter. His nose is bleeding and his eye is getting swollen but he looks full of rage as he turns around and looks down at the agent who is screaming a soundless scream, hand between his legs. Don glares at him then turns to Loki, "Are you okay?"

"Are you?" She asks, reaching for his nose.

Don chuckles. "I'm okay. Here." He snatches the jacket from the floor where it fell. Loki slips it on and he buttons it up even though he can barely see.

That's when they finally look at the group that has gathered, staring at the agent then them, and the looks on their faces tell Loki that they are not on their side.

"What is going on?"

Tony, Fury and Thor burst through the crowd to see the man on the ground gasping like a fish and Loki and Don tear and blood stained. They look between the two before Fury crosses his arms and says, "Anything you want to say, Agent Wolferson?"

Don crosses his arms, too, "Yeah. No one assault Loki. Including our agents."

There is a grumble of voices, but Loki is in love. "My hero," she says before Thor clears his throat. He nods his head to the stairs and without saying says to follow him. They are in trouble.

********************************

Don's hands are bloody. There are cracks from when he hit the man. Loki is now in sweatpants and a t-shirt, breasts smaller but throbbing. She has bruises growing on the one. Less fetching so she can't wear anything revealing tomorrow. Don's eye is almost fully closed now. His nose has stopped bleeding but not until it's dribbled on his shirt.

Across from them, sitting on chairs they brought to be in front of the couch sits Fury, Stark and Thor.

Fury is not amused at all. "I should kick you out of S.H.I.E.L.D. and arrest you, Wolferson," Fury hisses.

"I thought he was the nicest man I've ever met. Then he turns into some demon when some guy stands up to Loki," Stark mutters.

Don almost explodes, "Stand up! Loki, if I didn't respect your dignity I would tell them to look at your chest."

Loki snorts. "I have dignity but my body is my own." She flips the T-shirt up and the men jerk back save for Thor who, let's be honest, has seen her in way more compromising positions than this.

And as he sees the finger shape bruises thunder rolls and lightning cracks. He looks at Don as Loki puts her shirt back down. "That man assaulted my sister?"

Don nods, "And then some."

Stark is staring out the window, "Thor, please don't make it rain. I'm still getting married tomorrow."

Fury scowls, "Fine, Agent Tome will be released from duty."

"He needs to be arrested," Don says, frustrated.

"We'll deal with it and you. You shouldn't have attacked the man like you did."

"And what! Let Loki attack him? That would undermine everything the two of us have worked for. Everything she has done to prove this entire planet wrong. Or not stepping in like any of those people who just stood there and let it happen? No. She deserves better than that." Don turns to Loki and says, "You deserve better."

Norns, she really is in love. Don turns back to Fury and scowls, "Fire me. Put me on probation or whatever. I will not take back what I did."

And with that Don moves to the bar, ignoring them, and muttering under his breath, "An agent sexually harasses her and they expect me to be nice." Suddenly he yells, "I'd rather have my skin peeled off!"

Loki flinches. Great. That's a new nightmare she didn't need.

"He's right," Thor says as more lightning flashes, "Loki may be a criminal but I will not stand for her being attacked in such a manner. If he is not taken care of, I will do it myself."

Loki is touched by how protective Thor is being. He hasn't been this way in a while. Fury groans into his hands, looking all the more pissed. Finally he drags his hands away and stands. "All right. I'll take care of him. But don't expect this to not come up at your next court date."

He's saying it to Don, not Loki. But Don's tone tells Loki everyone is going to have something to be afraid of if they don't listen. "I'm counting on it."

*******************************

It is long after Tony and Fury have left and Thor has finished obsessing over Loki, making sure she's all right, that Don comes back to the couch. She's looking down her shirt at the bruise. She can't tell if it's better or worse.

"Does it hurt?"

Loki jumps. Don sits next to her and holds out a cup. The smell of cocoa is unmistakable.

She takes it, gently whispering, "Thank you.' She takes a sip. It's rich and so good she almost compares it to one of her mothers hugs. She misses her... "Not really. If I poke it, it's sort of does."

For emphasis, she pokes her breast a couple times, letting the raw soreness fill her.

"Stop it," Don says, looking ill.

Loki does. She taps the cup for a moment before whispering, "Thank you. For defending me. I'm sorry for acting out and embarrassing you." She has to take a deep breath because this part hurts to do, more then expected, "for acting... like a slut."

She feels sick. She hates pointing this out. Even if everyone in the world knew it, it doesn't mean she wants him to know it.

Don takes a long moment of sipping on cocoa before he speaks, "I think this is something we need to talk about. It's getting too obvious to ignore."

Loki curses. She doesn't like the sound of that.

"First off," Don says, and he almost sounds shy, "I think you're the most beautiful goddess I've ever seen."

Loki drops her cup directly into her lap and they spend the next couple minutes screaming and trying to ease the burn before she magics it away. It doesn't take away the burn though. "What do you mean by that?" Loki asks as she tentatively changes her sweats to the shorts, "you acted like-"

"I know!" Don says, uneasily eyeing her as if she'll drop something else on herself. "I know. Here's the thing, Lokes." Lokes! She blushes and tries not to react to that. "I don't look at people because big breasts or sizable hips. Looks are just looks. If I wanted that I have plenty of options to go for. I look at the heart, and who you are. You deserve more than one night stands or somebody who just wants you for your physical appearance. You deserve love, real love."

Loki feels ill at his words. So much makes sense but at the same time there's so many more questions. Does he love her then? Or is that just what he's saying to let her down easy?

"Second," Don continues, "it's insanely obvious that," suddenly he clams up. He looks out the window at the lights as if they are more intriguing.

"What is it, Don?" Loki asks, swallowing hard.

He looks up, "Jarvis, lights off, please."

The flat plunges into darkness. Don takes a deep breath as Loki's and eyes adjust. He says, "It's incredibly obvious that... we more than like each other, Loki."

Her stomach twists. "We..." she chokes. She wishes she could see him. She would turn the lights on but she has the feeling this conversation will be better done in the dark.

"Yeah," Don mumbles, "we. It's becoming more obvious and that's not good for our case. If they get any sort of confirmation that I have feelings for you or vice versa they will take me off your case. I'll be booted out of New York so fast neither of us will know what happened."

She gets it now. They're feelings for one another makes them look bad. An attorney running around with his client isn't a good look. So basically it's a true one night stand or Loki refrains and runs her chances with Thor and hopes for something later.

"Oh," Loki says weakly. Defeated.

"Yeah," Don echoes.

They sit in silence for a while, listening to music downstairs and watching fireworks go off congratulating Stark. It's not fair. Loki finally finds someone she can open up to and he's forbidden unless she wants to face a death sentence. Story of her life continues.

Loki looks up at the ceiling. This is about if people find out and see them. So nothing physical or soft. But... it is dark...

"So," she says slowly, "if we didn't have this... case in the way... would you have been amiable to a relationship... with me?"

She feels so vulnerable. She touches his hand with her pinky, stroking the back, feeling the veins and soft skin. His hand turns and his pinky intertwines with hers.

"Yeah," he says quickly, "I think I would have liked that."

This man is more insane than she thought. As the fireworks light up his face, she longs to kiss him. To hold him and be held. She squeezes his finger as if in question of his surety.

His pinky gently squeezes back.

*******************************

"I think I saw Steve Rogers pass by just a minute ago."

Loki is pleased to say that she's not the only one who looks at Peter strangely when he utters that sentence. Bruce and Rhodey do as well. They're standing out on the grass waiting for some kid named Harley to show up. Well, they are. Thor dropped Loki off here and now she's waiting for Don. She's better dressed today in green snakeskin leggings and green furs that covers her from waist up to her breasts where less cleavage is visible. She wears a black and white fur cloak and mini skirt. She still has her hair poofy but not as bedazzled. People still look but word has gotten out about Don. No one looks too long.

"Norns," she mutters, "who cares about the romance between Stark and the icicle man. If he's here let him be. Brings more excitement anyway."

Rhodey looks confused, "Bromance. I think you mean bromance."

"I mean what I said," Loki says as she scans the crowd again. There he is. Don is in a tux that shows off his form. He's talking to some women...again. he must feel Loki's stare because he glances over... and waves.

Loki blushes. Somehow this man has turned her into a young girl again, blushing at any bit of attention she gets. She needs to get a hold of herself or Don will be in Timbuktu before she knows it.

"Are you ready?" Loki turns. Thor is in a suit, too. It was elected he would not be a groomsman so he could watch her. It's very insulting but fair.

Loki rolls her eyes. "I suppose I am. I'm guessing we're sitting in the back?"

Thor leads them to halfway in the back to seats crawling with agents who want to kill Loki. They glare. She stands tall. The ceremony starts soon after with Pepper in a gorgeous dress, Stark nearly fainting and Peter waving at Loki till she sees he is in fact pointing at Steve Rogers in a horrible disguise. He has a card in hand. Loki smiles. Captain America couldn't stay away.

As the officiator drones on, Loki looks around. She doesn't know any of Peppers bridesmaids. Tony has Bruce, Rhodey, Harley and Peter up there. And Happy. The only agent besides Don she can stand. Wong and Strange here though Strange is more infatuated with glaring at Loki then watching the ceremony.

Then there is Don in the back, munching on cookies, watching intently. It's cute how invested he is. He must be quite the romantic.

But as Loki keeps looking at him, she starts to really see his face and a sick feeling overtakes her. He doesn't look happy at all.

He looks haunted.

Chapter Text

This old woman is glaring at him, much like the doctor who took his neck brace off. She doesn't want to be here and Loki doesn't want to be here, but this is part of Don's next move to show he's 'getting better' and can be a respectable citizen of New Asgard. Loki think it's a load of bilsnite dung but Don was encouraging. Said he needed it whether it was for public reassurance or not.

Loki had to force himself not to take it as an insult.

Some photographer takes a picture as the woman reaches out and puts an orange notebook on the table in front of him. "Therapy is to help you heal what is hurt, Mr. Laufeyson," she says, leaning back and scribbling something down. "Writing down positive things will help ease your conscience. What makes you happy. What are you grateful for. Good things about those around you and yourself. And it's a way to get your story out without endangering the public."

Loki wants to say no and shove the notebook away but the photographer does a close-up and Loki tries to make himself look innocent instead. He picks up the notebook. The camera snaps. It's quite simple. A little notebook with lined pages and a golden logo that he doesn't understand. The therapist starts speaking again.

"In our last discussion we talked about your brother. Have you spoken to him recently?"

Nosy woman. What's worse is he can't refuse to answer because that will be noted and make him look bad. He grips the notebook tighter.

"We had a phone call the other night. We talked about New Asgard and these..." he pauses. So does the cameraman, "...lovely sessions we've been having."

The woman hits her pen harder against her notebook. Loki has to force himself not to smile. He's irritating her.

"Mr. Laufeyson," she says, "do you miss your brother?"

Loki raises a brow at that. That's a strange question.

"It would depend on the day," Loki says, "if you know anything about siblings, miss, you would know siblings can go from throttling one another to having the others back quite quickly. Thor and I are no different."

The photographer snorts. Loki smirks at her. The therapist taps her pen harder. She wants this session over just as much as he does.

"What do you do in your down time?" She asks, "what hobbies do you have?"

Loki's smiles fades because he can't be honest about that. He spends a lot of his time with Don. Watching movies, making food, reading. That makes him smile fondly. Just last night Don was reading to him a book about a lion, a witch and a wardrobe. He likes it when Don reads to him. He makes the entire world float away.

The camera snaps.

"Read," Loki says softly, "I like to read."

"What do you like to read?"

Loki is starting to wonder how much of this is actual therapy and not just an interrogation to see what people can hold against him. He crosses his arms, then uncrosses them before the camera snaps.

"Anything and everything. You haven't lived until you experience life through someone else. Whether they are real or not doesn't matter. Learning from them does."

The woman narrows her eyes. This time the photographer takes a picture of her. She sets her pen in the notebook and slaps it closed. "Let's put a pen in this, Mr. Laufeyson."

Loki smirks. "Let's."

****************************

When Loki comes out of the room, he expects that agent, Happy, to be here still. To cuff him and take him home. Instead, sitting in one of the chairs is spider-boy, Peter Parker. He spots Loki then waves, "Mr. Loki! Hey!"

The entire room turns to look at Loki. He blushes. He likes attention but not like this. Peter flings himself over the chairs. In his hands are the cuffs.

Oh, norns...

He lands in front of Loki. "Mr. Stark asked me to come get you. Happy needed to get him and Miss Potts... Mrs. Stark?...from the airport."

Something is off about this. "And they sent you to retain me?"

Peter shrugs, "I know. I was shocked by it, too."

He holds up the cuffs almost awkwardly, "Uh... I'm going to have to cuff you. Is that... okay?"

Did he seriously just ask that. Loki raises a brow and Peter seems to get the absurdity of his question. "Oh, yeah, Uh..." he gently takes a wrist and cuffs one then the other.

As they walk back to the elevator, Loki asks, "So, you are driving me home?"

"Oh, no," Peter says, "I can't drive. I want to get my license though. I always wanted to travel. We don't get to do much of that. My first time out of country was when Stark let me help in Germany with Captain America."

This kid talks a lot. As they ride the elevator down he tells Loki about his aunt and his friend Ned who wanted to come but that would look weird if he did so he didn't. By the time they are in the parking garage, Loki knows half his life story and can't figure out how no one has assassinated them yet.

By the door is a black car which Peter promptly opens the back door for and motions Loki in, "Nothing fancy today. Just me and Agent Wolferson."

Loki frowns. "Agent Wolferson?"

Loki doesn't think he's gotten into a car so fast in his life. Peter is right. Don is in the driver's seat eating cheetos. Peter slides in and Don says, "Hey, kid, want some Cheetos?"

Peter grins and reaches for the bag, "Hey, Agent Wolferson. Thanks!"

Loki is practically scandalized that Don has not said hi to him. He clears his throat and in the rear view mirror he sees Don smile. "Hi, loki."

"Am I not allowed any cheetos?" he asks, and he knows he's being petty and childish but it makes Don chuckle so what does he care.

"No. They are for Peter and Peter only."

Peter cheers while I growl, "like hell," and make a grab for them.

Peter lets out an obnoxious yell and starts swatting at Loki while he squabbles with him, just taking on enough strength to make it look like the bag is part of a tug of war until Don yells, "If that bag rips and you get Cheetos all over my car, I'm making both of you walk."

Peter uses the distraction to fling his webs at Loki, blinding him. Loki yells and let's go, letting the bag go to the boy. Peter chuckles like a baby hyena while shoving the Cheetos into his mouth. Loki growls. If Don wasn't in this car...

Loki catches his eye in the rear view mirror again. It's amused but there is also more behind it. And not the positive kind of more.

Ever since the wedding their relationship has been strained. At first Loki thought it was because Don wanted to keep it all under wraps. Like he told him that night in Stark Tower as they watched fireworks. But lately, Loki's not so sure. Even when they are alone, he acts stiff. The other night they played a board game with Peter and his friends and the whole time Don refused to look at Loki and when he did, he flinched.

And last night it came to Loki. Don's memories. He had mentioned nightmares of people he'd only seen in pictures. Even now as Loki looks him in the eye and sees the heavy bruises there, he knows that's what it is. His memories are making a reappearance and while he hasn't said anything, Loki can tell it's getting worse.

That makes Loki want to do horrible things. He brought Valkyrie's memories forward, but that's not all he can do. He can repress them. Shove them back to the shadows where the horror never touches Don and he'll always look at Loki with eyes brighter than the sun. Happy eyes. Pleased eyes. Eyes he could stare at for hours. Not... this.

But Loki also remembers the night he found Don out on the couch, nursing a cup of tea, sleepless and despite those nightmares being about Loki's actions, he lit up when he saw him. And they talked about everything and nothing. Loki put him to bed that night. And he sat and watched him far longer than he would like to admit. He wouldn't look at him like that anymore if he knew Loki wanted to do that. If he did do that. Don would be angry.

But wouldn't he be angry if he regains all his memories? Will he stop caring for Loki if he remembers how much he loved his fiance? Won't he hate Loki when he remembers how she, his parents, his brothers died?

Loki doesn't realize he's spiraling until Peter hits his shoulder and asks "Hey, are you okay?"

Orange dust covers his face and fingers. Loki sneers in disgust. "Clean yourself up. You look like a two-year-old."

Peter frowns and starts to lick his orange fingers. Gross. Don huffs a laugh. "I take it therapy didn't go so well."

Cars beep outside their window. Loki turns away, looking at the residents trying to jaywalk. "It was fine," he grumps, "she's just ridiculously nosy. I think she is trying to interrogate me so she can bring something up at the next hearing."

Don hums as if that doesn't surprise him. "Biased. You can't win everything."

"She won't give me a good report," Loki says, "even if I did well in this awful thing you're putting me through. She would never say it."

"I'll talk to her," Don says, taking a corner that will take them over the bridge to Manhattan. Why they made his therapy appointment in Brooklyn is beyond Loki but it is what it is. "If that doesn't work I'll talk to Matt Murdock. He's good with these kinds of things."

"Who?" Loki asks.

Don smiles. "A friend. And a good lawyer."

"But I have you," Loki objects.

The fact that Don doesn't immediately agree speaks volumes. He just keeps his eyes forward. A sick feeling comes over Loki. What is he not telling him?

Peter suddenly drops the bag of cheetos, his eyes big. "Don, swerve right."

Loki hits the door as Don does as Peter says and swerves into a lane full of taxis who honk angrily at them. It's not two seconds later that a van goes flying by them, barely hitting multiple cars before landing hood first on a sports car, crushing it.

"Holy..." Loki chokes. That could have been them. They could be dead right now. Don could be dead right now.

He looks in the rear view mirror. Don's eyes are wide. He looks shaken. "Good call, Pete," he says, almost breathless.

"Somethings here." Suddenly Peter is yanking off his clothes and underneath is a blue and red shirt. His spider suit. He yanks a mask over his face.

"Wait, what do you mean?" Don asks as he comes to stop. But Peter is already out of his clothes and ripping open the door before throwing out his web and swinging away.

Don curses and gets out, too. Well, he can't just let him go face some unimaginable horror, so once he's by Loki's door, so he gets out and turns to behind them.

And he pauses. And he feels the urgent need to pick up Don and run. But what he does do is grab the man's arm in a solid grip so if Don runs or goes forward, Loki goes with him.

Loki recognizes Maw's ship. He would anywhere. A giant circle spins above Brooklyn almost like a beacon. And below it is Maw, flipping cars, Chitari clawing the streets like animals.

Orange Sparks fill the air then Strange is there, anger filling his face. "What did you bring here?" He hisses.

Loki scowls, "who says I did this?"

"I think it's safe to say most of Earth's problems start with you."

Ouch. That's uncalled for.

"Peter is up there already," Don says eyeing the giant spinning ship, "we need to help him and get the citizens out of here. Is Rhodey around?"

"No," Strange groans, "everyone is either at the airport or at the center of north. It's just us. Wong is on his way."

Oh. Grand. Wait-

"We're the only ones," Loki says, "how is that possible? Shouldn't the entire government be here for this."

Strange gives him a look, "Our government doesn't know how to handle this. We are Earth's mightiest defense or did you forget about that in the past six years."

"Either way, we're in trouble," Don says, slapping Loki's chest, "suit up, Lokes." He looks at him, a bright smile on his face. Time to show the world how much of a hero you truly are."

Loki pales. Is he insane? Loki has never been a hero. Not even when Thor attacked Jotunheim was he a hero. Or with Hela or the dark elves. It was all his own agenda. All he wants to do right now is run. Maw can't find him, he can't-

Suddenly Peter hits the car across from them, denting its roof. Maw appears on tornado of concrete, taking over the street. "Prepare, oh, Earth," he jaws, "for the day of your recompense is-"

He stops dead when he sees Loki, Strange and Don. His scowl lengthens out over angry teeth and Loki sees his hands twitch. It's almost second nature how Loki causes his magic to come to his hands. This is not good. As people run by them, screaming, Maw focuses his gaze and it's not on Loki.

"You," he snarls at Don, "you killed your only hope. You killed the great Thanos."

Don pales and takes a step back, "Look, man, I don't even know who you are. I've never even been to space."

"Silence!" Maw shouts, "for your sins you will be the example to your people of why you don't fight the inevitable."

He raises his hand, but a scream is already ripping from Loki's throat as he throws their car with all his might at Maw. It's a direct hit and he goes down. Loki grabs Don's arm and turns to Strange, "You deal with Maw. I have to get Don out of here. He won't stop until he gets his hands on him."

"What did I do?" Don says looking concerned and upset, "I don't even know who that is."

Thor's words come back to Loki. Of a multiverse. Of Thanos disappearing. How he got everyone but Maw. Maw would have seen that man. Seen him kill Thanos. It doesn't matter if Don is the wrong guy. He looks like him and that's enough to make an example out of him.

"It doesn't matter," Loki hisses, "we need to go. Our only chance is to outsmart or out magic him."

Strange nods then holds up his hands, "Here, I'll get you to some place-"

A piece of concrete hits him and then changes course back to Loki and Don. Loki curses and spins to send another car into Maw who barely dodges it. The concrete barely misses them. Loki starts running and Don barely keeps up. As they turn a corner away from Strange, Peter and Loki believes he hears Wong yelling out the fray, he says, "We have to keep going. Hide. He'll kill you the second he gets the chance."

The corner of the building behind them explodes. People scream. And that's when Don digs his heels into the ground. "We have to help the people. Too many are going to get hurt."

"Don, there is nothing we can do!" Loki yells as some explosion happens on their street. A Chitari lands next to them and Loki has to use a fallen brick to impale it, causing it to fall. "We have to go!"

Don pulls out of his grip. "I'm not as important as the next guy, Loki. I don't want people dying over me." Then he's running back the way they came, shouting at men, women and children to come down there way, leading them away and avoiding Chitari and ravaged streets behind them. As dust covers his suit, Loki goes numb.

He's no hero. But Don isn't giving him a choice. If he takes him, he'll hate him. And isn't that just selfish that Loki risks Dons life in exchange for not being hated. He's no hero but the least he can do is keep Don safe.

So Loki starts yelling too, telling people to get underground or go further into the city. Stay away from the bridge. When the Chitari come, Loki blasts them, making them disappear, sending cars and fire hydrants and light poles at them. Police, fire trucks, and more clog the streets. Whatever Peter, Wong and Strange are doing it's keeping Maw at bay, but not the Chitari. They keep coming in droves to the point that Loki has a creative shield to keep them out while Don ushers people to emergency responders.

It's hard being a hero. Especially when the love of your life is putting himself in danger for strangers who look at you with confusion and disdain. Don't they realize he's trying to help? No. Because being a hero is not in the cards for him.

Another car flies by into a hovering news helicopter that turns any which way and explodes on the next street. How much did they get of Loki trying to defend these humans? Does it even matter? He can see the headlines already. Former terrorists saves New York. Evil plan? Better kill him.

"They better be done soon," Don grouses as more ambulances arrive.

"Maw is an excellent for," Loki calls back to him, "we'll be lucky if-"

Then there he is, rising over the rooftops on another tornado of asphalt. Police start shooting but nothing hits him. Maw is too focused on Don. Loki's stomach drops. With a big shove, he pushes the Chitari into the building across the way. They die almost instantly when they hit the brick.

"How could Thanos fall to you," Maw hisses and Don twists around, "you're nothing more than an ant. At cockroach!"

Suddenly Don is lifted into the air. Loki screams, "Don!" And Maw throws him back onto the street that's on fire and has buildings ready to fall. Loki lifts all the humans around him. They scream as he shoves them further down the street to the relative safety of the police and other responders and Wong who has appeared to send Chitari back into space. Then he's running.

Loki has never ran so fast in his life.

Maw pulls a building down where Don is struggling to stand and run but Maw just pushes him back down. Don doesn't scream. But he does cover his face as if to hide from impending death. Loki screams as he glides in over Don, stretching out his arms and freezing the falling building where it is. And it's heavy. Like a world on his back. But he keeps his eyes on Don and his magic focused on crumbling parts of what must have been an apartment. Slowly Don opens his eyes and gasps. Loki smiles at him even though he's starting to sweat. "Hi."

"Loki," Don pales, "how are you-"

Loki begins to stand, keeping his eyes locked on Dons, his worried, wide, beautiful eyes. As Loki stands, the building goes with him. Slowly, brick by brick it falls back into place. And when it's softly put back on its foundation, Loki collapses by Don, out of breath, energy sapped. His muscles hurt. His lungs ache. Don's saying something but his ears are ringing. So he stares at Don instead. His dirt caked face. His messy clothes. Even his scraped cheek he must have earned when he hit the concrete.

Loki did it. He saved him. He saved Don.

A small smile spreads across Don's face and for a moment it's all Loki can see. An awe filled, soft, loving smile. His heart skips a beat. Norns. He's in love.

Suddenly Don is twisting around. Loki looks up to see a tornado of fire hurdling their way. Before Loki can react Don is on top of him, flattening him to the asphalt, covering his body the best he can. No. They are not going out like this.

Loki screams as he raises his arms, pushing the incoming flames away from their bodies. He feels a burn crawl up his arms and hands and around his shoes, burning them into his skin. It's hot. It's so hot. He can't breathe. But he has to because for once he has something to live for. The flames seem to stretch on for eons. His only grounding point is Don's face tucked into his neck, his body on his and arms around him as he struggles to keep them safe. And as the flames get lower, almost burning Don's back, it finally stops. Loki hear's Peter yell and there's thunder roaring somewhere. Thor. He's here. He must have seen the news. He got here so fast. Loki has never been so thankful for him in his life.

The ground around him is hot. Both sides of the street are toast. And as rain begins to fall, Don doesn't move. And despite the burning in Loki's arms, there are more important things than finding coolness. He grabs Don's face and pulls him in front of him so he can see him. So Loki can look in his eyes and see that the heat hasn't killed him. "Don? Don, are you okay? Don?"

His eyes are wide and almost unseeing. As if he's in a whole other time or world. "Don?"

Slowly Don blinks and life seems to reenter him. "Yes... yes, I'm okay."

Thunder roars again and Loki holds Don close to him. So incredibly close. He can't breathe. His heart is beating too fast. He might explode. Loki squeezes him, trying to ground himself. It would help if Don would move or speak but he does nothing. It's as if someone has cut his strings and he can't move. The thing that gets Loki moving is Maw. Where is he? He gently pries Don off him and stands, scanning as fast as he can for the tornado of asphalt.

He hears it before he sees it, the fire hydrant flying at his head. He ducks and he sees just beyond the curve in the next street a reporter with her cameraman filming. He curses. These people in their cameras. They should be running for cover.

"Loki," Maw hisses finally comes into view. Loki doesn't know where Wong or Strange is but he sees Peter crawling on a wall a few buildings down. Loki stands over Don, allowing his magic to flow to his hands.

"Maw," Loki says lowly, "our battle with you is done. This man did not kill Thanos and I will not let you destroy him or this world."

Loki can't believe he just said that. Maw seems put off as well. "You were the one that led the attack here. Do you really think that any of these people will keep you here? How they have not destroyed you with mob mentality is beyond my understanding."

Maw is baiting him. He won't let him. Not this time. "Come. Let's finish this! You're going to have to kill me to get to anyone else."

"Loki..." I hear Don huff, pulling his pant leg. Loki ignores him.

The tornado Maw is on seems to go faster with his anger, "So be it."

Then Loki is being slammed into the wall by an invisible hand forcing him back. Maw lunges for Don, a lamp pole at the ready to skewer him. Loki releases his duplicates of shadows that rise around the pedestal of gravel and slice it down with invisible hands.

The light pole is yanked from Maws grip as Peter swings in screaming "Booyakasha" and sending the pole back toward the donut ship that has the national guard circling and firing at.

Maw hisses as the plate is pulled out from under him. He swings a fallen tree out from a persons small thing of a yard and chucks it at Peter, giving Loki enough time to peel himself from the wall, run and hit Maw sending them through his green magic... and suddenly they are falling. Loki didn't mean to take them to the sky but he did now they are hitting the inside of the wheel of Maw's ship.

Loki hears him yell then the wheel starts to turn. Is he going to kill both of them? Loki turns to find a way off this thing as the ground begins to move away under his feet.

"Give it up, Loki," Maw yells as he rides the wheel like surfboard, "you're running on borrowed time and that time is up."

Somehow Loki knows he's right. Then he should have died all those months ago on that ship. But he didn't. And now he has something to live for.

Loki teleports. He rarely does so because it makes him sick. But he does. He goes right to Maw tackling him and sending them right out of the circle. They're airborne again as the ship begins to take off. They land on the roof of a nearby building and Loki swears his back cracks. His arms are screaming. He still can't breathe. But he has to keep going. He has to fight. With Don, Thor, numerous faces below, Loki stands and he fights. Maw is slow getting to his feet. He's bleeding. Not so inevitable.

"I believe," Loki huffs through aching ribs, "it's my turn to say your time is up."

Maw throws all the bricks and plaster he can at Loki... and it goes right through. He's a cocky magician. Worse than Doctor Strange who is still missing but it doesn't matter because once Maw realizes it's all an illusion, once he realizes that he indeed has lost, he cries "No-" and turns right into Loki's dagger.

It's not a quick death and to say Loki doesn't enjoy making Maw squirm would be a lie. It undeniably feels good to shove the dagger in and twist. Maw does fight until his last breath. He blasts Loki off the building and he hits the ground so hard his vision spins. When Peter comes, the boy is excited.

"Mr. Loki!" He cries, "We won! The ship is gone. The guy! He's dead! We won!"

It takes all too long for that one statement to go through his head. "We...won?"

Peter nods and Loki really wishes he could see his face under that ugly mask. Yeah! Strange and Wong are trying to keep the area clear but the reporters are coming. They want to talk to you."

"Me," Loki says skeptically, "the terrorist that just caused another terrorist to destroy two blocks of the same city I attacked five years ago."

"That just saved it instead of joining said terrorist and therefore showed him he can be better."

This is really a child before him. Nothing is that easy. Loki looks over himself. Covered in dirt and ash and grime. His arms are black and bleeding from the flames. He can't feel them. He feels exhausted, his vision's spotty. He can only imagine what Don looks like-

Don!

Loki grabs Peter's suit and shakes him, "Where's Don?"

"Uh...I don't know-"

"What do you mean you don't know? I left him here on the street!" Loki scans the road before them, his eyes skipping over reporters and TV crews pushing their way through the rubble. No Don. Loki reversed the polarity of that ship. The Chitari should have left with it. Did one of them take Don as a direct order before Maws death? Were they so blind that they saved everyone but the one that mattered?

"Calm down, Romeo," Strange lands feet from them, his cape flowing and his face scarred and scratched, "he went off with S.H.I.E.L.D. when you were on the ship. They don't seem very pleased with what just happened."

"Are they ever?" Loki hisses, letting Peter go. Don left? Just got up and left? Loki recalls his face right before Maw attacked. The fear in distant eyes. He wasn't himself. It was as if he was in another place all together.

The memories. Did this triggered Don? Did something set him off? Was he remembering Loki's invasion? Loki feels sick. This isn't good. If Don's running, then something disturbed him. He couldn't even wait for him. Loki's causing him nightmares. Their tentative relationship gone because some idiot in a spaceship had to dig up old memories. If Maw was still alive Loki would have kill him even slower.

Loki must space out because Strange and Peter turn him to the approaching crowd, holding strong. "Deal with that later," Strange huffs, "we got bigger fish to fry."

"An angry mob?" Loki groans against the spiking pain.

"Worse. Paparazzi."

And the cameras and microphones descend, reporters shouting requests at them, people with children crying, many asking why Loki did what he did, why save earth? Was he saving himself? Why New York? Did he know the guy? Why, why, why.

All the while, Loki watches for his brother who stands far away watching with a worried look on his face. "You save the world," one reporter shouts, "what's next?"

Loki has no answer. How could he when the one man in charge of saving him might have changed his mind.

Chapter Text

Loki continues not to see Don for days. It's as if he has disappeared off the face of the earth. Loki would almost believe that the Chitari took him before the ship took off but Thor says he's seen him, so Don's not gone. Loki's hoping it's for political reasons. There has been a radical shift in his case since the attack. People still see him and want him to face punishment for his crimes but some have lessened their... execution of it. Saving half of them will do that he guesses, so Stone has been having to deal with new evidence, Dan is up the walls upset about the whole thing and Loki's hoping that Don is working on a good case for them but that incident of the reception still pounds around his head.

And Loki's had his own problems to manage. Thor is angry and anxious over his arm being burnt to a crisp. It's forced Loki to revert halfway to his Jotun which makes him look like some translucent creature with a rash. Thor is obsessed with making sure Loki's magic in arms heal, bringing him strange conditions from their people to try. Most don't have the original ingredients from Asgard but as Don would say, it's the thought that counts.

The lack of the Don drags out from one week to two and halfway through the third Loki's concerned and dare he say lonely. He's allowed himself to be codependent on Don's company. To be fair Peters here constantly feeding him hot dogs and norn's knows what else. Human dining is weird.

It's not until after Tony says he's talked to Don about house management that Loki goes looking because Loki knows Don's in Stark tower. Loki's limited number of accessible floors has expanded since the attack and Jarvis leads him right to him. Loki's arms throbbing and his skin looks like the sky scratched apart by claws. It's something he wants to hide as he follows Jarvis to an office that is empty for the day except for a light in the back where he hears Fury yelling at someone. Don's voice is also unmistakable.

"So what," Fury is growling, "you're just going to quit. Run to the hills and never be heard from again."

"You know I can't do that," Don growls though he sounds tired, defeated, "you'd track me down. I just need a break, Fury. Is that too much to ask?"

Loki flattens himself against the wall as close to the door as he dares get. It's an open hallway so he can see into the office where Don stands in a blue suit facing Fury who he can't see. He stays away knowing the second he gets caught, Fury will arrest him.

"What's this really about?" Fury says, "Is this about you and this case or is this about Loki and your memories?"

Loki freezes completely. Him? Don's memories? 

Don sighs. "This isn't his fault."

"I never said it was."

"You implied it. I don't know why my memories are coming back. I wish they wouldn't. That whole fight unleashed a whole new chapter of horror. It's not Loki's fault and yet..."

In that pause Loki's heart stops. 

"And yet?" Fury pushes.

"And yet his actions are what are haunting me at night. That fight the other week... it awoke memories. I see people dying and those Chitari shooting and that big hole in space. And I feel anger. Horrible anger and I know Loki didn't want to hurt anyone. I know it but it just keeps ringing in my head like a bad omen. I just want to forget but I don't think I can. Not again."

Loki stares out to the other side of the office. Paper rustles from the air conditioner above their heads. And Nick Fury sighs. "What are you going to do about it?"

"I don't know. I'll be no good to his case Friday if I can't pull this fear out of me."

"Then confront him."

"And say what? I don't trust you anymore because I feel like my head is going to explode. That's not going to go well, Fury, and you know it."

Loki should leave. He needs to leave. But he stays even as tears flow down his cheeks and he feels like he can't breathe. I don't trust you. I don't trust you. I don't trust you.

"Then don't mention trust. Say what you need to say. Go to a gym or something with Rhodes. Get yourself out of your head."

"I'm compromised," Don sighs and Loki holds his breath so he doesn't hiccup, "he compromised me. My family is gone. Everyone I know. Just last night, I remembered all on my own what my brothers smile looked like. I remembered my my best friends spaghetti sauce. And at that wedding..."

"And yet you still believe in him."

"I do. Because I know the truth, no matter how hard it is. I just... sometimes I wish I had never met him."

Don says more, but Loki's ears catch on that. I wish I never met him. I wish I had never met him. But Don loves him. He practically said it. Didn't he? Did Loki hear wrong and he lied to himself? Was he so desperate to have Don that he forced this reality? Did he get so consumed with trying to prove himself to Don he forgot how unworthy he actually is?

He's stupid. Stupid, stupid, stupid-

"Loki! Loki!"

Loki rips his eyes open but it's all blurry. He feels Dons hands on his arms gently shaking him. He pushes him and the man falls back, "Don't touch me!"

Fury strides past them, and Loki can practically feel the tension he holds. "Work your stuff out, Mr. Wolferson. Let me know your decision in the morning." Then he's gone like the ghost he's supposed to be.

Loki wants to leave too, but as soon as he tries to get to his feet and run, Don stops him, "We need to talk."

"Get out of my way, Wolferson," Loki says pushing past him, "I have no desire to converse with a liar."

"Loki, just listen-"

"I will not listen to someone who dragged me-"

"Just listen-"

"And told me I mattered when it was all a lie!"

"Loki!"

Don says it in such a way that Loki flinches and twists to him, angry and wanting to demand an explanation. But he stops when he sees the tears in Don's eyes. The fear, worry, sadness. Loki chokes.

They stare at each other for a long moment before Mobius sighs and rubs his face, before saying once again, "We need to talk."

********************************

Don stares out the window while sitting on Loki's bed, the dark circles even more prominent with the bars across his face. It's cloudy out. Matches Loki's attitude and the bleakness of his room. He doesn't know what to think. He's hurt. Hurt Don has never come to him. Hurt that he might have lied but that's becoming less and less possible by the second. He's hurt at the whole thing.

When Don sighs and finally turns to Loki, he does so with sluggish movements. "Loki," he says, clasping and unclasping his hands, "i'm... not doing great."

"Clearly," Loki huffs.

Don shakes his head, "I extracted myself from you in the hopes it would go away and that hasn't worked. In fact, Fury thinks it made it worse."

"Are you going to be cryptic this whole meeting or can we get to the point?"

Don curses and gets to his feet. He paces back and forth until it explodes out of him like an awful ugly mudslide. "I see you," he chokes like he'll throw up, "again and again in my head. Attacking New York but it's not from some screen I've watched a billion times. I see it in real time. Those chitari. They..." and he stops and haunted look from the wedding is back.

"What?" Loki says, something sour and big resting on his tongue, "say it."

But Don doesn't. He just stares at Loki and he grinds his teeth so hard his jaw aches. Don't scream, Loki, don't scream, don't scream, don't scream-

"Show me-"

Loki's teeth loosen. He's lost now. "What-"

Don comes back to Loki's bed and sits closer to him this time, determination on his face. "My past. Show me."

Loki's stomach drops and his anger fades to horror. This is exactly what he was dreading. 

He shakes his head. "I don't know how to-"

"Don't pull that bull with me," Don hisses and now he's angry and Loki's the one who's scared. "I know you pulled up memories for the Valkyrie. She told me all about it when I interviewed her before taking you on. I know you can do it. So do it, Loki!"

Loki shakes his head again. That stupid Valkyrie. Of course she told him. It's his number one offense against her. Now it's come back to bite him.

His face must give it away because Don's sighs and rubs his face as if he has a headache. "I'm sorry, Loki. I know it's... ignorant of me to ask you to do this. Especially after this past week. I've treated you... harshly instead of talking to you like I should have. And I understand if you can't forgive me for that. But I need to know, Loki. Before I lose my mind to these nightmares and memories."

 Don really looks at him then and Loki's breath catches. Don's eyes are wide, sad. Fearful. "I need to know the truth. I need these nightmares to stop. I need to stop being afraid of you."

Tears prick Loki's eyes. He's torn between anger and hurt and fear. He shakes his head again, "You'll hate me..."

Don shakes his head even if they both know they can't guarantee that Don won't when Loki pulls his hands away from his temples. Don gently takes Loki's hand and the tremors that are going through him tear Loki's heart in two. "It's going to be okay, Loki," he whispers, "I need to know. I need to be able to tell the difference between the Loki in front of me and the Loki six years ago. Right now... right now I can't."

Loki inhales shakily. Whether it's from the fact that he has to do this to get his Don back or because Don says he's someone else from who he was when he attacked New York, he doesn't know. But that's what gets Loki. Don's hope that things can go back to normal. That Maw and this past week have not actually damaged them beyond repair.

Slowly, Loki raises his hand to Don's face, pressing his fingertips gently to his temple and cheek.

"I can't promise this won't hurt," Loki murmurs.

"I trust you," Don says with eyes closed and hand gripping the hand not attached to his face. 

Loki exhales unsteadily, "Okay."

Loki presses his fingers against Don's face with more force and a crackle of green crawls over his skin before the world goes fuzzy.

**********************************

When Don said his brain was chaos, what Loki was expecting was jumbled thoughts, not fragments of memories strewn all around. It's like scattered books with no order save the ones over the past six years that are starting to fragment over the forgotten books weight.

Loki pieces it all together slowly and with each memory comes a clearer and clearer look at what exactly has haunted Don these past couple months. And once Loki does get it sorted, he gets swept in and everything starts to make sense

*************************

"Don!" Ben yells from the bottom of the tree. "I'm coming up!"

Don looks down and watches as Ben scrambles up the tree. His dark haired friend is a lot ganglier than him, making easy work of climbing the tree. When Ben gets on the branch they look out over the cornfield and watch the sunset.

"You smell like fish," Don comments.

"Shut up!" Ben yells back, his ten year old punch light on Don's arm, "you would too if you came fishing like I asked."

"You know I got chores," Don grumbles.

As the stars begin to appear, Ben turns to him and stares for a long time before saying, "We're best friends, right?"

Don looks back at him. "Of course. You're my sidekick, remember?"

Ben laughs way too hard of that. I"f anybody is a sidekick, it's you." Then he sticks up his pinky and extends it to Don, "pinky swear on your life."

Don rolls his eyes. "Ben. We're ten."

"So. A promise is a promise. Pinky promise we'll be friends till the day we die."

Slowly, the light fades. Before the last rays disappear, Don wraps his finger around Bens and shakes it hard. "On my life. We'll be best friends until the day we die on the sea together."

Ben rolls his eyes, "You and the sea."

Don chuckles, "I know, I know..."

******************************

Suddenly Loki's whiplashed from his place next to the two boys on the branch to a cold tile floor. Lights flicker above him. Glass is shattered on the floor. There's screaming. Too much screaming.

Loki lifts his cheek from the floor to the two men in front of him and his breath catches. Don, his Don, hair still blonde and to the middle of his ears is crying. His nose is bleeding and he's blubbering as he shakes the body in his arms. Blood covers the short black hair but his face is unmistakable.

Mannequins and suits fall around them. Ben is in one, almost as if he's dressed for his own funeral. There's one next to Don, too. A white one. He must have been shopping for his wedding.

Don is sobbing, his hand combing through Ben's bloody hair, turning his skin red. 

"Ben," Don is sobbing, "Wake up. Come on, Ben."

Loki can't look away from his tears. The water drips onto Ben's slack face. And he keeps calling Ben's name. Again and again.. until Loki's pulled away to the outside of a brick building surrounded by a fence and a tar playground...

*******************************

Don hits the wall hard. His ears ring but it doesn't hurt hurt as much as his nose which is gushing blood. The two other boys grab his shirt and throw him to the ground.

"You're so weird," one of the kids growls. He picks up a book they stole from him when they came and started their daily bullying session which only happened because Don decided to help the kid they hate. No matter what good he does he always gets the short end of the stick.

The kid flips to the dog-eared pages and snorts. "Look at this," he says and shows the pages to his buddies who also laugh. "Loki, the god of mischief. What a freak. What god has kids with a horse and causes the end of the world? You're so stupid." The kid chucks the book over the fence and it hits the road.

The bigger kid grabs him and drags him to his feet. Don flinches back, trying hard not to cry. "Better call on your god of Mischief to help you," he hisses, drawing his fist back.

Then a pop can hits the kid in the head, throwing josta all over him. His lackeys yell as a bigger version of Don appears and the kids back up. Don grins through a black eye. His older brother swings one of the kids around and gives him the boot sending him into the fence. Then his little brother with dark hair and a loud yell comes around and begins kicking the one holding Don who is trying to wipe the pop from his eyes. He lets go and tries to swing but the elder grabs the kid and hisses, "If I ever catch you hitting my brother again, I'm going to feed you to our rooster. He's a cannibal, so don't try me."

Then he kicks this kid, too and the bullies go running.

Don goes to them and his younger brother hugs him and yells at the kids, "You better run!"

His elder brother turns to him, looking over his face, "You alright, Don?"

Don smiles and nods, "Nothing can get me down."

"Good," then his brother hits his shoulder, "I should beat you up myself. You owe me next time."

Don just giggles. "Yeah, all right." He punches the elders arm but then the three do an awkward sibling hug, grins on their faces.

********************************

Loki yelps again and he's on a road watching as the brown-haired kid, now in his late twenties runs toward him but gets blasted and is gone in the next moment. And Don screams. He tries to run by Loki but his older brother, covered in dirt and ash grabs him and pulls him back.

"We have to run, Don," he states, "there's nothing we can do!"

So they run. And Loki runs until they see a bridal shop. The elder brother points right as a Chitari lands behind him and sets off a bomb. The brother shoves Don toward the shop as the bomb explodes.

His parents die on the next street over, driving to get there sons. He wouldn't know that for a while though. 

*****************************

She's the prettiest thing Don has ever seen. That means a lot of considering Don has seen a lot of beautiful men and women and everyone in between in his time. She's smart. Out of his league. She wants to be a lawyer. When she tells him about it he feels shy. He just wants to sell jet skis. She always laughs but it's not in a rude way. Just a 'oh, Don, I couldn't love you more if I tried' way.

They met by accident in the hospital. She broke her arm. He had a little too much to drink. He thinks she took pity on him but she just laughs and says no one could resist his sad dog eyes. 

They dated for a couple years. Finally, Don had the nerve to ask her to marry him while out on a lake, after hooking a jet ski up to a dock. It was all perfect. His family was ecstatic. Hers liked him. Her family had moved to New York so they plan to have the wedding there and a reception in Cleveland.

The day before they're trip into Manhattan, he and she sat out on the escape ladder staring at the setting sun over the burrows. Sirens fill the air. They had just heard about the attack in Germany.

They are scared.

"You don't think someone will attack New York, do you?" She, Denise was her name, asks.

Don shrugs, "We'll be okay. Life hasn't steered us wrong yet, has it?"

Denise snorts, "Do you remember how we met?"

Don's face turns soft, enamored, "How could I forget?"

Denise still looks uneasy so Don takes her hands and kisses it. "Hey. We'll be okay. This time next week will be married in Cleveland and away from scary men with horns on their heads. Let's just take it a day at a time. Tomorrow we'll get my tuc and your dress and we'll be ready for when the day comes. Okay?"

Denise, tears in her eyes, nods. "Okay, Don. I trust you. I love you."

Don squeezes her hand. Gently, he kisses her, too, "I love you."

*****************************

And there she is. Running into the street in a pearly white dress, veil behind her. And Don is running to her. Loki stands stolk still as the rubble around him crumbles. He feels Don's panic, his fear, and anger permeating him. Everything the memory permeates with fills Loki's body. Burnt skin. Ash. Smoke. He can't breathe. He doesn't want to breathe. It's too much! It's too much!

"Denise!" Don screams. 

He grabs her hand and she starts pulling him back toward the shop. "We have to hide!" she yells.

Their hands stay intertwined as they run for the little shop full of burning dresses. Then Loki sees him. On one of the Chitari's skifs, blasting holes into the street.

"No..." Loki mumbles numbly, then screams, "No!" He runs for the couple. Push them. Pull them back. Do something to stop what's going to happen-

Denise screams. The ground explodes and the two loose hold of each other before her pretty dress splashes with blood. Loki chokes. The overwhelming grief clogs his throat. Don's jaw drops open and a horrible wail fills the air.

Loki doesn't want to watch Don grab his fiance and yell for help, but he can't move. Don screams. Don cries. Then a Chitari lands beside him, hits him in the head. Loki screams. The world goes black and the next time he's awake, a doctor named Verity Willis is above him. She asks him some questions. He can't answer any of them.

He doesn't even know his own name. 

*********************************

From there Loki falls. He falls through the fall of Hydra and S.H.I.E.L.D., through paperwork on the Winter Soldier, through the news about Rhodey falling and through Don beginning a reputation for himself until he's one of the best lawyers S.H.I.E.L.D. ever had.

Loki hits the ground hard as he comes back to reality. It's almost as if he was physically there and when he pulls away from Don's brain they collapse of the bed, gasping and panting. Loki sobbing just slightly and he can hear Don heaving behind him.

"Sorry," Loki gasps out between heavy breaths, "that was more intense than I meant it to be."

Don's voice is soft as he murmurs, "Thank you. I remember it all now. My family. Friends. I have a past. I'm not in nowhere man anymore."

Loki hears an edge in his voice. Something he is holding back. Loki forces himself back into sitting position even as his arms shake. "But?"

Don lays sprawled on the bed, eyes cloudy, staring at the ceiling. Loki doesn't dare touch him. If he does, he fears his wrath. Don doesn't speak for a long time. So long Loki fears his throat will swell shut from the sobs and anger and fear he's holding in.

"I don't know what to do," Don says slowly, "now that I know. I think I should mourn. But how do you mourn for people when you have lived so long after them and only then remember them? Another part says to go back to work but that feels disrespectful." He turns to Loki and Loki barely catches the flinch. He has to force himself not to take offense. Don has every reason to look at him that way. Like Loki is something to fear and yet his eyes stay so warm. He can't understand how that could be after all of this.

"Loki," he says slowly, "you heard Fury. He wants me to leave for a while. Technically he wants me to transfer but I'm not going to allow that."

Where is he going with this? Don must see his confusion cause he sighs. "I don't know how much you heard but I'm going to be transparent, Loki, because that's what you deserve."

Something clogs in Loki's throat but he doesn't get to think about it before Don turns on his side and looks him dead in the eye as he says, "I'm angry. That my life was taken away, that it was through your invasion. I'm mad at Fury and Coulson and everyone else and I don't really know why. I'm angry, Loki, even though I know why you did it. And I'm sad. Fury's scared I'll go into a depressive episode. Those never end well in S.H.I.E.L.D."

"So, you're leaving," Loki says, interrupting as fast as he can. Because suddenly he can't breathe all over again. 

Don's breath hiccups. Tears touch his eyes. Loki reaches for his shoulder and he slaps his hand away. Don's never been this harsh. The vision of Loki shooting Denise fills his mind. He deserves this.

Don's voice is rough. "I don't know. I need to sort myself out. I don't think that can happen here."

Loki's throat tightens. He knows what the right thing to say is. Go. Help yourself. Do self-care. Be a good man and let Don go. But he's selfish. And he wants him to stay. Loki doesn't want to be alone.

"Don..." Loki whispers.

Don jerks to his feet and makes for the door. "See you tomorrow, Loki."

The door slams hard. Slowly Loki's hiccups turn to sobs. The faces of Don's family, of Ben, of Denise fill his mind until it's all he can see.

"I'm sorry," Loki says into the fist he's jamming against his mouth, "I'm so, so sorry..."

But all that hear him is the walls and Jarvis who never makes a peep. 

*******************************

The atmosphere is tense when Loki comes to breakfast. Thor has been around a lot, debriefing since the whole Maw thing. Everyone is exhausted. Tony and Pepper share the couch, whispering about files in front of them. Rhody sits on a stool as he makes bacon and eggs. Thor and Peter spot him from their place at the island and Thor pales.

"Loki," Thor says and Loki stops in his tracks. It's his killing voice. The one he uses on animals before killing it for the next feast. Loki looks at Peter who is stirring his cereal, looking sad.

"He's gone," Loki says slowly, "isn't he?"

Peter swallows hard. Thor tries to laugh, "No, not for long. Just a small vacation. He'll be back soon."

"Soon has a variety of meanings."

Peter swallows and finally speaks up, "He asked Matt Murdock to help you with your case. He said he's a good lawyer. He'll get you out of trouble."

When no one in the room elaborates, Loki asks, "Is that all?"

Peter seems to get smaller. Tony and Rhodey tense. Finally, Loki hears Pepper sigh and say something to Tony. Thor slaps on a fake smile and holds out his eggs and bacon. "Do you want breakfast?"

Loki stares at him and thinks of all the things he could do. Stab Thor. Scream. Maybe throw Tony out of a window again. Instead, he shakes his head, "No. Not hungry." He feels numb as he says it.

Loki goes past the island to the ceiling to floor windows overlooking the streets below. Loki sits then, back to the Avengers and stares as rain clouds cover the city. He doesn't move for a long time.

Chapter Text

"I think our best bet is showcasing the good you have done and will do."

Loki brushes his finger over the fogged up glass, trying to make a smiley mustache face before it disappears again. He exhales and starts over. Tony is going to make him clean the glass again. He knows it. Leaning on the window across from him is Matt Murdock, walking stick by his leg. He doesn't know Loki but he still feels seen. There's something off about this man. He's not some normal blind person trying to do his job. He's edgy. Quick. Too sensitive to his surroundings. The first day he came in, Loki threw a knife at him. He was so angry. The man caught it, threw it back. He didn't make a good impression on Stark that way but Peter thinks he's cool and considering he almost took half of Loki's fingers off, he's impressed, too. And weary. Too weary.

"Do you want to talk about him?" Murdock asks, bluntly. Loki shakes his head. Murdock continues anyway. "He called me the other night. I couldn't talk long, but he asked about you. He misses you. I can tell."

Loki snorts. A helicopter passes by. Loki makes finger guns and pretends to shoot it. "Sure."

"I think we should get you a new therapist."

"I think you think too much."

Loki finally really looks at him. Murdock is smiling. "You know, in another life, I think we could have been friends."

"Keep dreaming."

"Don did give me a good idea, though. He said you should do some community service. Try to give back. Your heroics with the invader brought positive feedback. He thinks more good acts what do you some good."

"Wouldn't the press be suspicious of that?"

"The press are suspicious of everything. We won't tell them. Just let them find you."

Loki rolls his eyes, slipping back into his fetal position against the window. Don has been gone for a few weeks now. He hasn't moved much. He doesn't want to. He's making Thor nervous. He keeps coming and sitting with him, talking his ear off, refusing to leave. He brings Loki food he barely eats and water he barely drinks. Thor forces him to shower, to sleep, even move a little. Loki is both endeared and repulsed by it. He wants Thor to leave him alone. But he won't. He can't. And maybe that's Loki's fault playing the 'I'm dead' card too often.

At that Loki's throat aches. It's been doing so a lot. He's having horrible nightmares of Thanos and Don's wayward twin who doesn't come and save them, but just stands and watches. It's been so long now but the horror, the need to run still runs through his veins. But Loki doesn't because against all logic, he's waiting for Don to come back. To pull him out of this lonely tower. Save him a second time. He's living on the hope that Don gave him.

Loki sniffs,"Stone doesn't like you."

Murdock smiles, "Can't say many in court do."

"Don likes you."

"Yeah, well, maybe he shouldn't."

"Now you sound like me."

"Stay on topic."

Loki scoffs. "What do you want me to say. Yes, I'll go build buildings and grow gardens? I don't think that's going to change anything."

Murdock shrugs, "It's worth a shot. Or do you want to be free to drag Don around with you wherever you go or not."

Loki hisses, "Don't ever say his name like that again."

Murdock's smile seems to grow impossibly bigger, "Noted."

**********************************

And that's how Thor finds him, two arms deep in manure trying to start a garden for the homeless. It's humiliating and Thors laugh is only cut off by Loki grabbing his throat and trying to force him to eat it. It's fair to say Murdock won't be happy to see (haha, see. He's so funny) Loki and Thor on the news getting shot by Rhodey's suit because more manure was on them then in the garden.

So on the ride back to the tower, both of them spitting dirt and manure, Thor starts his little conversation with, "I'm glad you're outside again."

"Shut up," Loki hisses, "I thought you were in New Asgard."

Thor spits out a chunk of grass as he rubs a bleeding bicep. "I was. Sif is back. She found other Asgardians. She's upset about Asgard. I'm just grateful she's alive."

Loki sighs. Thor hasn't talked about the Warriors three. All dead when Hela attacked Asgard. Loki's fault, too, he supposes. Thor's childhood friends are dead. Just like Heimdall. Loki swallows hard, but says nothing. Thor rubs his bicep harder until he returns from whatever hell he's made for himself and smiles. "You'll never guess who we met up with at her homecoming celebration."

Loki rolls his eyes. "No one I care for I'm sure."

"Don."

Loki pauses at trying to wipe the grim on his face. Don. His Don. In New Asgard. Of all the places he could have gone to, he goes to New Asgard. "Wolferson?" He chokes even though they both know the answer.

"Yeah," Thor says, happy as a clam, "He and Sif had a long argument over you. Despite what you might think, Loki, he doesn't hate you."

Loki looks away, picking at the gross matter under his nails. "Sure."

Thor sighs, stares for a moment before continuing, "Sif said something to me after our conversation with him. Something that never occurred to me until she said it."

Loki forces himself not to point out that usually the norm, but listens instead. And as his brother speaks his blood runs colder than it ever did when he was in Jotun form. 

"She said she recognized him, Loki."

Loki looks up, tense, ready to run but doesn't know from what. "How? She wasn't on the Ark with us."

Thor shakes his head, "It was odd. When she first saw him she did a double take. The second she was done arguing she asked about our childhood and that's when I recalled-"

"Thor, if you don't stop being so mysterious I'll make you eat worse than manure-"

"You saw him when we were children."

Again, Loki pauses. So does the chatter in the front of the van. Rhodey and that man, Happy, are listening. "What?"

Thor leans forward and if Loki were to be honest, he'd take this more seriously if Thor didn't have manure spread across his face. "Do you recall when we were children you drew the same man over and over again and we all thought you were mad?"

No. Not well. Loki remembers drawing. It was always something different save for...save for... He's going to throw up. Save for the man with cropped hair, a mustache and suit. He was always there. A shadow always watching. The man who appeared on the Ark. 

"Sif remembers those pictures. I don't but she does. Don looks exactly like that man."

Loki shakes his head. His head pounds at the sudden revelation. How was this possible? Why is Don so intertwined with his life like this? Childhood pictures. That man on the ship. Don helping him now. It's not right and yet it keeps happening.

"Who is this man, Loki?" Thor says so quietly he sounds like he's caving in on himself. "Are we sure he is even human?"

"He is." Loki chokes, the man's memories rolling through his head. "He is. But that doesn't answer anything, does it."

"Originally, after we argued at Stark's wedding I thought maybe the man was a Skrull, hiding as a man, a human, to make himself look weaker. But then Sif brought up the pictures and I remember Mother mentioning how you were obsessed with some man none of us could see."

Loki swallows hard, shaking his head. This whole thing just gets stranger and stranger. "How is he, Thor?" He asks and Thor's eyes concentrate on the floor.

"He's... alright. Not as happy as when I see him here. He spends a lot of time at the docks. He's attracted to the water. I think it suits him."

Loki nods even though the mention of such a large body of water makes his stomach roll. If Don were to disappear in it, Loki wouldn't be able to save him. Curse his never learning to swim and his powers being weakened by the substance. "Good."

"He asked me to say hi when I saw you." When Loki doesn't respond, Thor ducks into his view, eyes earnest, "He worries about you. He still cares, Loki. Just give him a little more time."

Loki smiles weakly, feeling any urge to put on a mask crack, "Thank you. Tell him I say hi as well."

Thor smiles and sits back before looking down at his trousers and groans. He'll never wear those again.

*********************************

He's pathetic. He knows he is. He can't eat. Can't sleep. He just leaves his room and sits in that window sill all day and all night. Seeing things he promised himself he wouldn't see. Like the world's opinion of him flashing on big screens. Some call for death. Others call for Don's death. And it scares Loki how much malice there is out there. Of course there is for him. If someone could break into Stark's fortress he's sure they would have by now. Instead he wonders at how much malice there is for Don who has done nothing but be kind and be truthful.

Bruce tries to get Loki to spar with him. Apparently he's trying to communicate with the hulk and thinks Loki can get him out. It doesn't work, no matter how hard Loki hits him. And he does hit him harder than necessary because Loki sees himself. He's angry at himself. He wants to tear himself apart.

Loki about does one night when Thor calls saying Don is doing well. Loki doesn't really notice how much time has passed since he's left. What he does notice is that the phone in his hand is in little shards by the end of the call. He bleeds all over the white carpet. Pepper finds him and her demeanor is one of fear and determination as she cleans his hand. He sees why Stark loves her. She has a fire to match his.

Once upon a time Loki thought he needed fire. He thought double the fire would make Asgard take him more seriously. That is not the case. They had Amora. They had Loki. Fire makes everything worse. Which makes Dons personality so much more poignant.

Don can be a dangerous snake or a gentle warrior. A sweet sea spray or a torrential rain. He's flexible. Exactly what Loki needs. And now Loki's drowning in him. He's being put out. Or maybe Loki was never the fire to begin with. Maybe he was the tree being burned alive by ambition and false prophecies only he believed in. And now that Don's put out the fire Loki's s left rot. To either die or become something new.

Right now he is dying.

Loki's dying as Parker sits where Murdock usually does, chomping on snap peas and chips, telling Loki how every other teacher is assigning Loki's cases as homework for history, court and probability classes. Science is the only class giving him a break. How generous.

"Loki," he suddenly says with an odd softness to his voice. Loki looks at him and he can't help but wonder what fascination this child has with him. Why him?

"Yes?"

"I know everybody says that even if you're released, we should watch our backs. Not take out eyes off you. All that stuff. And I used to agree with that." 

"Used?" Loki questions. Peter nods.

"I don't think that anymore. I think you have trauma just like everyone else. And at one point you were in the red zone and we should... make up a system so you don't like lose it again."

Loki can't help but smile at how oblivious this boy can be. "And what do you suggest for that?"

Peter shrugs. "I don't know. I thought maybe it could be like on the scale of one to ten or maybe like green fly, yellow flag, red flag. You know something to help us to know how you're feeling without getting into the nitty gritty."

Loki can't help but chuckle at that. "You think that will work?"

"Doesn't help to try. My Aunt May did that when my parents died. Helped me show how I was feeling without making me talk about it. Just... let's people know more than just..." he makes his hands flap around as if he's freaking out. "Ah! He's going crazy! Lock him up! You know." Loki raises a brow. Peter sighs. "For example. If I had a really bad day, Aunt May would ask, hey how are you or hey how's school and I would say like eight red for anger or seven blue for sad, you know."

Oh. What an interesting predicament. Loki hums. "Well, spiderling-"

"Spiderman-"

"I'll give it a try. If I feel the burning need to watch your world burn, I'll let you know."

The grin that covers Peter's face makes Loki's inside squirm. It's too... happy.

"So," Peter urges, as he flips a web at an apple on the counter and brings it back to him. "How are you feeling right now?"

And Loki thinks for a moment because he doesn't know how he feels about this system but he does know that Peter seems to trust him and that he wouldn't push him if Loki didn't want him to. So Loki trains his eyes on the sky as clouds overcome the world once more.

"Ten, blue."

******************************

It's not like Loki has a total loss of connection from Don. It's just not the same as the connection they had before. He at least sees him once a week when Murdock and he call him for legal stuff. Don continues to look more and more better, especially when he gives the same lecture to Murdock each week about how Loki's worthy of second chances. Murdock just smiles and says he has it noted and slaps Loki's shoulder with his cane. At some point after those few months Loki begins to buy into his sentiment. Maybe in another life they really could have been friends.

Loki goes through the ite of the courtroom that has Stone looking a little bit more bored each week. Dan curses Stone who likes to ask Loki about New Asgard at inappropriate times and he even bribes Loki with candy. Loki's pretty sure Dan is going to lose his mind one of these days.

Then there's Thor who calls every other night and always puts Don on the phone. And they talk about nothing and everything. Most of it is why he leaves the house everyday and what Loki's done that day. Eat new food? Take a walk somewhere new? Loki values those phone calls. He debates the fact that maybe Don doesn't hate him, that he has to reach out to Loki despite it all. Loki does try to talk to him about it. It's something that makes him want to bring back the Ark and cut into space. But Loki tries not to because for once he wants something good in his life and for once he wants to work for it. So he tries to talk about it, but Don doesn't open up much like he did before. Thor says he never brings any of it up, doesn't talk about it. Loki does though. Always does.

Loki can feel Thors worry becoming powerball. He's been talking about coming back so they can go sightsee. He talks about food and training and says Loki should try to get to know the other Avengers better. All things that Pepper says can help with depression. Or therapy which only goes so well when the therapist only writes in a notebook and gets really irritated when Loki won't answer if he wants to break out and either leave the planet or invade New Asgard.

Nonetheless, Thor is scared. Loki can feel it. And he tries to tell him not to be. He doesn't listen. And he wisely shouldn't. Loki's come to rely on Don's presences too much. So much that he doesn't feel whole anymore. And that is bad.

Loki wouldn't be here without him and I doesn't know where he'll go if Don doesn't come back.

**********************************

Stone hits the gavel hard on his podium. Loki can tell he's becoming frazzled. He's tired of this. The trial that's been going for months with no sign of a verdict. Today was another look at evidence. Murdock sits next to Loki as some policeman shows tapes of the attack. Dan is not alone for once as the Governor is here representing the state. Loki can tell Dan is trying to look high and mighty. Better than what he actually is at his job. He believes it's beginning to drive Stone a little crazy.

At some point Murdock interjects with evidence of Loki's brain waves now versus the data S.H.I.E.L.D. collected when he was on the helicarrier, showing the difference in the power of the mind stone that can be built up by reading from when they had Barton strapped down. Compared to his waves Loki's are through the roof. Which only aggravates Dan, saying Barton is under house arrest for aligning with Captain America. Case in point, Loki could be ten times worse now.

At that point Stone bangs his gavel and asks for another break. Dan looks peevish and Stone and he exchange harsh words behind glances and covered mouths.

Murdock pocks Loki with his cane. "Have you ever been to the docks?"

Loki glares at him, "No. Humans aren't supportive of intergalactic criminals sight seeing."

That gets the man to smile. "You would be surprised. Come on. Happy is going to take us down there. There's not much for you to do here."

"And what am I to do at the docks," Loki growls, "I don't fish. I certainly don't lift things."

"Community service won't kill you," Murdock laughs, "but no that's not why we're going down there. Though that is a good idea. I'll have to see if anyone down there needs something."

Damn him and his big mouth. Loki follows Murdock down to the van where Happy and Peter wait. 

"How are you feeling?" Peter asks, looking way to happy for a trip to the docks. 

Loki scowls, "Eight red."

"Well, hopefully, it'll be a green one soon."

Loki wants to smack him. Steal Murdock's cane and smack him so hard Tony Stark feels it. But he doesn't. He just gets in the van and pouts until the smell of sea salt breaks through the windows. The van bumps again and again, rattling Loki's jaw and causing things in the back to slip and slide.

Eventually the van stops and Peter lets him out, Happy glaring behind him. "You go diving into the water," the security man states, "and I have the authority to shoot you."

Loki snorts, "Right. Noted."

He slips out letting the smell of fish overcome his nostrils. There a few workers left for the day who stare. The setting sun leaves an orange tint to the world, creating a sentimental feel to the end of another day. Peters grin gets ten times bigger. "Color?"

Loki glares harder, "Hasn't changed."

Peter grabs his arm with strength that Loki often forgets he has and drags him around the car to a pier where a man sits at the end in a polo and shorts. He turns and Loki sucks in a breath. Don is here, silver hair glowing in the light, a soft smile on his face. Loki's heart stops.

"How about now?" Peter whispers and Loki feels his hands automatically stick to his arms like they do when he sticks to walls and the the ceiling. Loki ignores it in favor of staring at the man who waves at him and pats the wood beside him.

"Loki," Don shouts, "hello!"

Loki waves weakly. Why is he here? When? He doesn't understand. Gently Peter pushes him forward and he has to do it two or three more times because his hands are so stuck but nonetheless Loki walks robotically to the man he hasn't seen in months.

He stands beside him, stuff, scared. Don looks up at him with sad eyes, as if is addressing this is going to be hard. "Hey, bud."

"I thought you were in New Asgard," Loki says.

"I was," he says leaning back in his hands, "but... I missed home." He looks at Loki again and his breath catches. Don't be a fool, Loki. He means New York, not you. Don pat's the wood planks again. "Please. Sit."

Loki swallows hard. Peter, Murdock and Happy stand at the end of the pier as if blocking his way. He's not going anywhere. He wonders how much planning went into this. He sits slowly. The pier is low enough that his feet fall into the water. He looks at it for a while, the water cooling his toes after he magics the shoes and socks away. His stomach growls. Don hums. 

"Hungry?"

Loki shrugs. "I haven't been eating as much as I should."

"Thor mentioned that. To be fair I've lost some weight myself." Loki glances at Don's stomach. Indeed the pudge that used to show through his shirts is gone. 

"Shame," Loki says before he can stop himself. Don winces.

"We're quite the pair. Aren't we."

Loki says nothing. How could he when he doesn't know if Don's going to dismiss him or hold him. Slowly, street lights come on, making strange shapes around them and on the water. Don clasps his hands together and says, "I'm sorry, Loki, for how I reacted."

Loki shakes his head. "How could I expect any less than that. Frankly, you have every reason to bind me and throw me to the wolves."

Loki still hears and sees Don's past. The yells and cries. His anger and grief. It haunts Loki.

Don inhales sharply. "No, Lokes. You are traumatized just like me. You were coerced into attacking New York. Manipulated." Don looks at him then, tears in his eyes, "This wasn't your fault. My families deaths, my fiances death was not your fault."

Loki chokes on a sob and has to turn away. "I still did it, Don. Whether Thanos was in my head or not I've hurt thousands. I tried to kill my own people then I tried to take over yours. I'm not... good."

Don exhales slowly, "Not then maybe. Maybe you didn't have the support system to help you be. But your not on Asgard anymore. And it's not 2012." His hand touches Lokis shoulder. He flinches. Don doesn't pull away. "Can we start over? Start from the beginning?"

Loki finally looks at his face. Start over? Don smiles and holds out his hand. "I'm Don Wolferson. Agent of S.H.I.E.L.D. I have horrible flashbacks, eat way to many sweets and like jetskis. You are?"

"This doesn't change anything."

"This can change everything."

And Loki can see it in his eyes. The hope that disappeared when his memories bombarded him has returned. The pull is still there but instead of a hurricane battering Loki is a whisper, a curses. Don looks at him like he put the stars in the sky. And even if these past couple months are going to leave a scar, Loki knows he can't be mad either, because if Don had told him he murdered his brother, his mother, even Odin, Loki would have been upset, too. He would not have been as forgiving as Don and maybe that's why he accepts this. Because he's tired and if Don can extend a hand without hate so can he.

Loki takes his hand, shaking it lightly, "Loki Odinson. Former Prince of Asgard. I'm Jotun, killed thousands and have a weakness for chocolate."

Don laughs, his voice startling Loki. "Wonderful to meet you, Loki."

Their hands do not separate, but they do lower to the dock as they stare at each other. Don's frown returns. "I can't be your lawyer anymore."

Loki frowns, "Why?"

Don shakes his head. "I'm compromised in more ways than one. I left the case and that's already caused a ton of backlash. Thor and I think it best we let Matt take over. He's a brilliant lawyer. Better than I can do."

"I trust you more than I trust him," Loki hisses.

"Oh, come on. You haven't tried to kill him in all the months I've been gone. That's progress."

"I didn't try to kill you either."

"I'd say if looks could kill I'd be beyond six feet under."

Loki rolls his eyes, "You're impossible."

Don laughs but turns serious again immediately, "I want the best for you, Lokes. I think Matt is out best bet to get you released and returned to Asgard's care."

Loki sighs, "He already told me what the public is looking for."

"Mostly the same stuff," Don says, "death threats, life imprisoned in the raft or in space. But I talked to the governments of Norway and New Asgard. Once it's become a part of the land, the think they can keep you there. A home arrest type deal."

"Would that bode well for me?"

"It's the best shot you got."

Loki groans. He wants this to be over. He's tired of all of them judging his life. This needs to be over and soon. "Humans make judgments so complicated."

"We try to make them fair, but that's rarely the case. It's not a perfect system. Not even close."

Loki sighs, "What then? What if Murdock doesn't succeed?"

"We'll figure it out," Don says, squeezing Loki's hand, "I trust Matt but if he can't pull through we'll go at it together. You're not going to be alone again."

Darkness falls leaving only the vans headlights and a street lamp to enlighten them. Loki's heart stutters and it's almost like they are back on the sofa during Stark's reception, staring at fireworks, staying hidden in the dark. Only now they don't have to hide.

And with this realization, Loki turns to Don and says, "So, if you're not my lawyer anymore, does that mean we can-"

Don laughs, "I knew you were going to get there eventually." He turns fully to Loki, leaning in just a little bit. "Yes, Loki, it does." A grin breaks across Loki's face. Fireworks dance at the tips of his fingers. Loki's about to holler when Don holds up a finger, "But! We have to at least try to be discreet. For Murdock's sake more than anything."

Loki rolls his eyes. "You humans and your delicate sensitivities. My ravishing you has nothing to do with Matt Murdock or any of this legal nonsense."

Don sputters and turns red. "For heavens sakes, Loki, it's too keep you on Earth, not to cockblock you."

Now it's Loki's turn to turn red. "Crude."

"As if what you just said wasn't."

"I'm dignified. Ravishing is a compliment."

Don's face disappears into his free hand. "Sure. Why not." Then under his breath, "Date an alien they said. It'll be fun they said."

"I'm royalty, Don, not an alien."

"You're royal, alright. A royal pain in my-"

Loki rips his hand from Don's, cups his cheeks and kisses him. He leans into it, and the warmth of his mouth makes Loki shiver. Somewhere behind them, Peter yells and Happy groans. Loki ignores them for the taste of key lime pie and the tickle of a mustache. Don's hands reach for his waist, the warmth of his palms making Loki's side tingle. His thumb's draw circles around his ribs and Loki has to tear himself away as the sensation make some shiver. He lays his head on Don's shoulder, panting. Don's breath ruffles his hair. He curses quietly. Loki smiles.

"Elskling," Loki says, rubbing his cheeks gently, "you are my day. I have been in the dark since you left and now the sun is home. I don't believe I have ever been more happy to see it then in this moment."

Loki says all of this in Asguardian so Don simply smiles in confusion, "You're going to have to translate that for me, hon."

Loki can't help but laugh at the difference in Asguardian and human endearments. He lightly kisses him before saying, Don't worry, there will be plenty more to come. You'll learn."

Don sighs and nuzzles his face, "You're going to be the death of me."

Loki kisses him again, "What a wonderful way to go."

And it would have been a beautiful moment had Don not lost his balance and fallen backward, hand sliding off the dock so the momentum takes them both into the water. Loki screams. His magic sizzles, drains into the water as he starts to drown. Don has to drag him back to the dock so Peter and Happy can pull them out. Loki is cursing the whole way and Don is laughing.

And as they are driven back to Stark Tower, Loki's magic sizzles them dry slowly bit surely. Peter and Happy and Murdock are laughing and Don is smiling at Loki with adoration in his eyes.

If they immediately fall into Loki's bed and sleep until late morning it's nobody's business. Don is home. Loki is home. And for this moment that's all that really matters. 

Well, that is true until Murdock lets the axe drop. 

Then it's all back to square one.

Chapter Text

"Stone is stuck between a rock and a hard place."

Don giggles beside Loki. Across from them Murdock is very agitated, a file open before him even though there is no brail for him to caress his fingers over. 

Loki picks at her black fingernails. Human polish never lasts long enough. "Isn't he usually? Sometimes it seems like Dan is going to throttle him."

Murdock shakes his head. "Not like this," he shoves the file at them, "Stone is losing his patience. This case has gone farther and longer than he wanted. It's to be closed on this next court date. A decision has to be made. We are out of time."

Don grabs the file. Loki rests her hand on his shoulder as they read over it. Most of it is stuff Loki has seen before about community service and therapist records. On the top is an order from Stone to be ready to finish the case a week from today. 

"I believe it is a relief that this is coming to a close," Loki says.

Murdock shakes his head harder. "You're not getting it. The jury is ready to pass the death sentence unless you do something to prove you will never hurt humanity again."

Don takes a sip of his coffee and and lets it clack harshly against Stark's island. "What are they demanding in order to make that happen? The 'never hurt humanity'. Not the death sentence."

Murdock's face turns to Loki and she really wishes she could see his eyes. She shudders as he speaks. "You have to prove your not dangerous and that is impossible. As long as Thor is an Avenger, you are going to look dangerous. He is a god. He has power that scares people. As his sister and attacker of Earth, anything he does will be reflected onto you ten fold."

Don's face drops. He looks up, eyes wide. And Loki's blood freezes. "Thor." Loki hisses, "Their basing my sentencing off my brothers idiotic behavior!"

Murdock nods. Loki slaps the island, the metal rings on her fingers making it even louder. She stands quickly, causing the stool to fall and clatter against the wood floor. It takes everything in her not to shout and let lose a band of magic that would rock this tower to its core. 

"But this is Thor," Don says, "he and Loki are vastly different."

"Not vast enough."

Loki curses the human judicial system. "So what," Loki bites, "Thor isn't going to change. He's the God of Thunder for a reason."

"He's a powerful being from another world who aided in the destruction of Sokovia in which many people still want to prosecute him for."

"My brother in an oaf!"

"Okay," Don says, slamming his hands down on the island, "Let's go talk about this elsewhere, Loki. Matt, thank you for warning us. I'll call you after we have discussed this."

Don takes Loki's arms and drags her away as Murdock says, "Don't take long, Don. Time is not in your favor."

*********************************

Loki marches back and forth in front of Don. Her nerves on fire. She wants to throw Thor off this tower. He doesn't have his hammer. It could maim him, just a little bit. Show everyone they are not as invincible as they look. But then that makes it worse because then Loki's the same person who blew up half of New York. There is no right way to do anything because of Thor!

She kicks the pillow on the floor from where Don threw it this morning after their pillow fight. It hits the window and Jarvis says, "Please refrain from kicking anything at the window."

"It's a pillow!" Loki hollers.

"Mr. Stark will be notified," Jarvis says. 

Loki's about to start raging at the AI voice when Don says, "Loki, we need to think this through. Please sit down."

"I can't," Loki hisses. She stomps her feet a few times before pacing again. Don reaches for her wrist but she tugs away.

"This is pointless. All of it. A stupid pantomime for your people when the jury already decided it's verdict ages ago."

"There has to be a way, Loki."

There's anger and despair in Don's voice that makes Loki pause. And when she really looks at him, she sees his fingers clenching and jaw tight. And she remembers she's not the only one facing the consequences of this, of having a jury that had a complete bias all along.

Loki sighs and finally makes her way to Don and sits beside him on the bed. They sit there for a long moment, shoulders pressing against each other as the impossibilities grow.

"We could run," Loki whispers, "Brunhilde could take us into space. Start a new life on another world."

Don chuckles, "I'm not cut out for space travel, Loki."

"Whatever thing that looked like you and saved me was."

"Well, I'm going to just call him my creepy doppelganger and keep it at that. You ever read 172 Hours on the Moon. Talk about horrifying."

Loki shakes her head. They're not going to talk about that right now. It's an argument for another time. Don rests his hand on her knee, "If we can't find another way, we'll go. I sure don't want to waste another moment without you, Loki. If we have to run, we'll run."

Loki knows it's contradictory but the more she thinks about it the more she knows it's true. "I already took too much from you, Don. I can't ask you to leave you planet."

"If it's the only way..."

Loki looks at Don, really taking him in. And her heart squeezes at how soft his eyes are. The warmth of his hair and how happy his countenance. "In what world do I even deserve you."

"In all of them. You have me till the day I die."

"Which is too soon. If only Idunn's apples still existed we could make you a god like Thor and I."

Don snorts, "If you were human, we could grow old together."

"Impossible. Even without the apple, I'm still a frost giant. I'd still live thousands of years."

"Less powerful though?"

"Something like that?"

"Frost Giants," Don hums, "I would like to see that someday. They sound so beautiful..." And as he rambles Loki's mind drifts. Ignoring the Frost Giant part, Don is not wrong. They don't have a lot of time. Murdock is right as well. Loki doesn't have a lot of time to consider all of this. Don is already middle aged. He is halfway through a humans normal lifespan. Not to mention the danger they face everyday by being with the Avengers let alone Lokis own enemies. 

Loki stares at Don, at his wrinkles and softness and if she could, she'd swoon at his good heart. He's still rambling, keeping Loki's anxiety to a low until she's so love drunk on his voice that she says, "Don, what do you imagine for your life?"

That takes him by surprise. He stops for a long moment, thinking hard before saying, "I don't know. I wanted kids a long time ago. I thought it would be nice to have a small family to tease, to love." The sentimental smile that crosses his face squeezes her heart. Don turns to Loki, that smile haunting. "That's not something you need to worry about, Loki. A life with you is all I need."

They spend the next hour trying to come up with some defense. It doesn't really work. There isn't much they can do, no matter how hard they think.

Don and she turn in early, not wanting to face the world that is condemning her. Don falls asleep relatively quick. Loki is attached to him. Don likes to call her a barnacle, hard to pry off. Whatever that means. She keeps her space. He doesn't know anything. But for now she's curled around him, face in his hair, taking in as much as she can. And she prays to the Norns that they find some way to be together. That Don doesn't have to go through more pain and Loki...

Loki swallows hard. No, they'll find a way. She rubs her stomach.

They have to find a way. They have to...

******************************

"I want to have his child."

Thor chokes on his coke and coughs so hard and loud that at least half of the tower and Jarvis come to the gym to make sure he's all right. As if Loki's physically brutalizing him when he's sitting on him weight rack six feet away. When Thor can eventually breathe again, and Jarvis has given him a big lecture on no drinks in the gym, he glares at Loki.

"That's not funny, Loki."

"I'm not lying."

Thor swats at his face before finally sitting his flabby behind back down on the bench. "What are you talking about?"

Loki lowers his head, his face getting hot. He didn't mean to say it a loud but Thor has been pushing in on their relationship, the egg. He pulled it out of him. "Mobius was telling me about his wants in life. And it made me think about what I may want if things could go my way. And since you are king and I'm going to be under constant surveillance it made me realize... I want a family. And not just with any random person, Thor."

Thor stares at him with wide, contemplating eyes before he starts to laugh, "I knew you were soft for this man, but this is more than I ever could imagine."

Loki scowls, "I know the irony of the statement, Thor. You don't have to rub it in."

Thor's face falls and he clears his throat, "Sorry."

Something in Loki pops. He's been sitting on this for days and the gall of this man to joke like this is impossiblely insulting. Loki stands, knocking a few weights from the stand. "I never should have-"

Thor lurches out, grabs his wrist, "No, Loki, wait. I apologize. That was rude of me. Please, stay."

Loki yanks out of his grip. "I only told you cause you've been through this whole relationship thing with Jane. And yet you laugh-"

"It was my mistake, Loki," Thor urges, "I just... Sometimes it's strange to see you so..."

"Naive,"Loki huffs. 

"Happy," Thor counters and Loki's face falls, "I never realized how unhappy you were. Not until I had something to compare it to."

At this admission, Loki sighs, relaxes. He rubs his neck as he says, "Yes, I suppose he makes me happy."

Thor smile albeit wearily, "I can't imagine anyone better for you."

Loki snorts, "Right."

Thor pats the seat of the bench. Loki sits slowly before his brother says, "So, you want a family with Don?"

Loki shrugs, "I suppose that's the basis of it. He's a good man, Thor. I could and have done worse."

Thor hums, "That is true. Many of the men and women you chased in the past were commonly in bad taste."

The grand master comes to mind and Loki flinches at the memory of his hands all over him. "Don't remind me. But you know him, Thor. You've spent time with Don. Does he seem the type to use and run?"

"I trusted him the moment I saw him," Thor says, sitting up straight, "whoever or whatever saved you looked like him and that was enough."

"When we still have no idea what it was."

"Yet still Don is just as noble."

Loki rolls his eyes. This conversation is not going anywhere he thought it would. "I thought you would object to this," he says, trying to be truthful, "Having children is a big decision."

Thor shrugs, "I want to be an uncle. I think it would be fun. Telling stories, throwing axes, babysitting, it would be satisfying. My only concern is how your going to procreate from jail."

"Don't be crude!"

"It's truth, brother. Everyone wants this trial over and it's not going the way we wish it too. Starting a family is not looking promising."

Loki sighs, and puts his face in his hands. Thor's right and he knows it. A family with Don is not possible as long as he's on death row. And despite the flipancy Loki knows Thor is not happy about it. He made a big deal with the press yesterday which did not help their case at all. Though that Republican will know better than to make the god of thunder angry from now on.

"I don't know what to do," Loki mumbles into his cold hands, "neither does Mobius. A

Our only shot is making me look less dangerous than you."

"You are less dangerous than me."

Loki doesn't really mean to do it but he smacks Thor with a burst of magic and he pops off the seat and lands halfway across the gym. The agents yell in surprise. And Loki groans cause this will definitely be on his record.

While Thor yells at Pepper to not tell Tony about this, Loki stares at his reflection in the mirrors placed around the gym. He's pale, his hair needs washing. He hasn't slept much this week. Because there is no way to prove he's less dangerous. He has three more days with Mobius then thier little dance comes to an end. He will be convicted and the best case scenario is a phone call twice a year from the Raft. And Don will move on. Loki would urge him to if only every selfish atom in his body screams at him to never let go. 

He goes through the options again. No space. Don can die too easily there. No hiding because S.H.I.E.L.D. is everywhere and everyone will look for them. There is no Idunn's apples to make Don immortal so there's no waiting for the justice system to go obsolete and Loki can go free. And there's a specially no bribing the jury. He'd be dead in a heartbeat. Thor won't be able to get enough people on his side. They are on their own.

It's ironic. The one time he needs to be, wants to be weaker and lesser than Thor is the time his life is on the line for not being so. Odin would be laughing in his grave. 

Loki watches as Peter makes an effort to haul Thor up while Rhodey runs on a treadmill and is laughing and shaking his head. His leg about gives out and Peter has to catch him, too. Rhodey is strong for human. Loki is better than to look down on him for his injury after all this time. The man would be honored and feasted to on Asgard and should be here if Earth had such a custom. The place of flesh and blood and softness and...

Loki wants to throw up. 

**********************************

When Loki finishes the line, holding a plastic skull above his head, looking into its sockets, Don claps and cheers from the floor where he sits partially cross-legged. Loki takes a bow and hops off the bed, feeling pretty good that finally someone appreciates his acting skills.

"Was that an Asgardian story?" Don asks, "You told it very well."

"Thank you," Loki says, popping down next to him, "and yes. The story of the Valkyries and Deaths hand is one of my mother's favorite. She used to regale us with it. She was trying to teach us how to flood the stars with nobility. Suppose she thought it would ease the tension between us."

"Well, you were sensational," Don grins, leaning in and leaving an almost too sweet kiss. Loki's lips tingle as he smiles into it. 

"If only all of Asgard could agree with you." Loki looks away and his head pounds, an ill feeling filling his stomach. It's now or never. "Maybe I could be a theater teacher at New Asgard's school. Everyone needs to know the arts. I think that would be a good job for me."

Mobius snorts, "A job at a school. Where is that coming from? Are we moving to New Asgard and I somehow lost the memo?"

Loki takes a deep breath. His hands shake as he takes one of Don's hands into his and begins massaging the palm. Don hums and he knows it feels good. Loki continues to speak. "That would be agreeable." Don's thumb twitches. He continues. "I know it's not set in stone and there's a lot to finalize but if... we win. I don't want a throne. I don't need to prove myself anymore. You and Thor made that part clear."

"That doesn't mean-"

"The point is," Loki butts in before Don can freak him out, "I want to live a happy life. With you if you want it. And that life... that life can't be in New York. It can't be here. You said it yourself. No one will want me here. I won't be missed. I believe, though, that I can be happy wherever you are. If you let me, I want to try."

Don's eye brows pinch when Loki finally looks at him. "Let me see if I got this straight. You want to live with me in New Asgard and teach theater to children?"

Loki nods. "That sums it up."

"And that's if we win."

"I... I have an idea for that."

Don leans so he's bent over looking up at him from where Loki's eyes are focused on his legs, "What idea?"

Loki swallows hard. "I make myself weaker."

"How?"

Loki reaches out, cups Don's face as he slowly panics inside because if he makes this decision, there is no going back. It would hurt Thor but save him and Don. At least, he hopes it does. 

"I give up my godhood."

And Don's face turns from confusion to horror in seconds. He pulls away and Loki feels sick. "No," Don says, "I can't let you do that. Not for me."

"Don-"

"Loki!" He hisses, "that's giving up who you are. Your family, your heritage, your life. I can't let you do that!"

"And if I don't, the risk of being thrown in prison is even higher! This could be our chance, Don! To be together. I may still live a longer time than you but we will have time. I will be weaker than Thor."

"No."

"I'd do it in front of everyone."

"No."

"There will be no denying that I am finally human-"

Don stands, his figure so tense Loki's worried he'll snap in half. "Loki," he says so strictly Loki flinches, "this would mean you lose your magic. You would have no powers, no strength, no speed like you do now. You'd be a fleshy lump like me who can die incredibly easily. You can't possibly want that."

"I want you," Loki argues back, also standing, their height difference casting a shadow on Don. "I want to be with you and there is no other option."

"What happens when you miss it," Don says almost maliciously, on the verge of tears, "What happens when I'm not enough anymore, Loki. When the tedious life of a human becomes too much. I see you when it's your turn to do dishes. You snap your fingers and it's done. There won't be any of that if you give it up. Just hard scrubbing, cleaning and no shapeshifting when you want to hide and no illusions to trick Thor with. You'll be without what makes Loki the god of mischief."

All of it sounds horrible but that last line is what gets Loki. He stands straight and says, "That's not who I want to be anymore. I can still do tricks. Peter has taught me some. Yes, cleaning will be horrendous but we'll be doing it together. I thought long and hard, Don. And I found godhood lacking. I'd rather spend a measly twenty odd years with you then spend a thousand plus years pretending my life has some sort of meaning beyond causing chaos. Nothing good can come of me staying like this-"

"But there will be!" Don almost begs, "There will be good, Loki. I'm not worth this. The pros do not outway the cons."

Loki steps forward, a new sense of determination crawling in his skin. Loki cups Don's face, taps their foreheads together. Don's chest is heaving. He closes his eyes, blocking Loki from the emotion Don does not want him to see. 

"Your worth everything, Don," Loki whispers. 

"I'll never forgive myself," he whispers back.

Loki kisses him, trying to convey his want and need for this to happen. Don presses back with a feeling of desperation. Loki has to force himself to pull away, eyes stinging. 

"It'll be okay, Don."

"No one can guarantee that."

Loki embraces him, holds Don tight to his lithe body. Don hugs him back, slumping into Loki, making him shiver with the contrast of cold and hot skin. "I love you," Loki says into his hair, "and even if it's not enough, I always will. Til the stars blink out of existence, I will love you."

"And when your disgusted and ashamed as a human?"

"Even then."

"I'll fight you on this, Loki. But I know I can't stop you."

"Will you hate me for it?"

Don shivers slightly, "No. But I can't say I'll be happy about it...if it comes to it."

Which it will. They both know it. Loki kisses his forehead, squeezes him. Don jerks in surprise at the action and his back pops. "Sorry."

Don shakes his head, holds Loki tighter. "We are some Greek tragedy, aren't we?"

Loki snorts, "Greeks are melodramatic. And no. We have a chance to change the ending. I won't let it be a tragedy."

"You're going to rewrite the story, huh?"

For some reason, the man who looked like Don comes to mind. His intervention rewrote Lokis story. He knows he was supposed to die on that ship. But because of him Loki didn't. Now he has a reason to take ahold of his story properly and change it himself.  

"Yes," Loki says, "with all my power, I am."

Don hums, "Loki, god of stories. I like that."

For some reason, those words soothe the tension in Loki's body. He slumps into Don, nodding into him as he watches the sun set out the window. 

"Yes. I believe I like it, too."

******************************

They arrest him the night before the trial. 

Tony has a holy conniption fit. Don argues about notices. Even Bruce says they need a permit to come into the tower. None of it changes a thing. They still come and they still take him. 

It's almost like deja vu. Loki gets taken to an undisclosed location. He has enough guards around him to swarm a donut shop. There are people who stop and stare as he goes. The only difference is he doesn't have a plan of rescue. And he's in the ugliest combination of clothes he's ever worn. Plaid pajama bottoms that go to his calves because Don is short. A t-shirt that says low key which Don thought was funny. And flip-flops because why not.

They put him in an isolation room. He'd be nervous if he didn't know he'd be facing the world soon. Before the door closes, he hears Thor's shout and the tapping of a stick. Murdock. Then the door is locked and Loki's stuck, waiting for his sentencing.

Loki thinks about Don. About how he barely got to brush his hand before they pushed him away. If that was the only goodbye Loki gets, then he hopes it's enough for Don. That he won't be in too much pain because Loki's already sick to his stomach that he couldn't even get a hug in, let alone a kiss.

Loki observes his body, the pale skin, how cold it is and he watches the green ripple through his veins and he thinks about how that will look and only a couple hours. Humans lack the necessary genes or enzymes to feel and wield powers they don't understand. Maybe Loki can still access some magic with his Jotun biology. However the part he has no idea about is what will happen when he rejects Idunn's gift. What is the fallout. No one does that. It's unthinkable. It's like rejecting Odin and all he stood for or Thor and his title as god of thunder. It's like rejecting the Norns and the life they give. And yet....

The door opening catches Loki off guard, making him jump on the bench he sits on that he doesn't remember going to, and he raises his hands up, not expecting to be let out so soon. But no, Thor stands before him, trying to smile but he just looks constipated. The door closes behind them with a loud bang. Then he speaks. "Hey, Loki," he says slowly, as if he'll spook the god of mischief if he goes any faster. 

"What does it look like out there?" Loki asks, skipping tedious pleasantries. 

Thor shakes his head. "The building is surrounded. Don won't be able to make it here. Stark barley made it here in one piece." Loki jerks at that line. He hasn't realized so much time had passed. Thor sniffs, rubs his nose, "You're right. The people may be in awe of me but they fear me, too. They wanted to restrain me. Keep me from seeing you."

"They think you would break me out."

Thor slumps against the door. "I have no power now, Loki. Everything that happens from here on out depends on you."

"You tried your best. We all did."

"Do you have a plan?"

Yes. But he doesn't say that. Instead, he says, "I know what I have to do. You may hate me for it."

"I've never hated you, Loki," Thor interrupts. 

"That's not my point. I have an idea. I can't tell you, but I know you won't like it."

"Loki..." Thor rubs his face, his actions sluggish, "Can you promise me you won't kill yourself in the process?"

Loki smirks, "Any death that happens today will not be by my hand."

"The humans," Thor looks away, not wanting to finishing the sentence but Loki knows what he's getting at. The humans. Wise yet barbaric.

A buzzer sounds and there's a tap at the door. Thor's eyes almost grow frantic. He stands straight before saying, "I'll see you on the other side of this, Loki. I promise." The door opens and a relatively small guard ushers Thor to leave.

"Oh, brother," Loki chuckles, "Didn't I say the sun will shine on us again?"

That seems to ease him just enough that he lets the guard lead him away and Loki is alone again. If it wasn't for the reinforced walls he would believe he hears the chants of death echoing through the building. But it's just his mind conjuring up the anger and disdain. He looks toward the corner of the room where he knows the hidden camera is and he stares. Is he on TV? Is Don watching? How much of that conversation did the world hear? It doesn't matter. It is out of his control. The only thing he can't control is the precipice he's on. He's playing a dangerous game by rejecting a gift of Idunn. There will be consequences.

Loki spreads his hand, letting tiny fireworks burst above it in all shades of color. He can't help the tear that escapes his eye. His mother's gift to him. The magic that made him who he was for so long. The fireworks turn to flower petals. He kisses a rose one, a whispered 'I miss you' press to the silky softness. 

Then he sits patiently and awaits judgement.