Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

"I'm sorry." It was all the blonde had heard from the man standing in front of him, his reasons reached no man's ears. Katsuki felt like this world had wronged him. Weren't they chasing each other? What happened to that? He sighs, there was nothing he could do. Izuku was his only best friend, of course half and half isn't. They just didn't have the connection he felt around the green haired man. But why did he even pop up in the list if he's not a friend?

"I'm so sorry Kacchan." Izuku said again. Stop. Stop that. Who are you? That was the only thing Katsuki couldn't understand. Why is he being like this? 

"Bakugou." Someone whispers to his ear. "Baku-" 

"I heard you the first time icy-hot." Katsuki spat out. He was with Shouto, though he doesn't actually know why on earth he would be alone with this man of all people in this... Bar. They were drinking, well... He was. Not Todoroki. 

"Bakugou, what's on your mind?" The man asks, staring at him rather than ordering a drink for himself. It felt like he was down in the dumps and his 'best friend' was there to support him.

Since when did this dense man become his best friend? Or even a friend at all?

But nonetheless, he felt like he could trust him. "He rejected it. Becoming a hero." He turned his head after saying that, locking eyes with the man he didn't really expect he'd open to. "Ah, Midoriya didn't want to be under your agency?" And he knew it, this icy-hot may be dense but he's caught up with what's happening to Izuku lately, he's not so dense after all. 

"Yeah, now drink with me." Katsuki says, his tone a little disappointed and yet a little bit annoyed. "It's okay Bakugou, even though he chose Uraraka... You're still his best friend. I am too." The last sentence came out after a short pause, it's like he's also trying to help the obviously broken man beside him. This was the best way he could say things without the other getting offended, after all... That man, does things to him without even actually having the intention to.

He heard a short laugh from the blonde, "Hah? You? My best friend? Keep dreaming." He scoffed as he took another glass of scotch that easily made his throat burn and yet, he felt relaxed with its effects. "I do see you as a close friend Bakugou. You are special to me, but you do not see that." Shouto said with a straight face as the bartender gave Bakugou another glass of his drink. Without thinking for another second, Shouto took the glass, held it close to his lips and drank the contents in one go. Just as how Bakugou would do so, and he stood up from his seat. "I'll be waiting outside, go out once you're done." And with that he just... Left.

After a good ten minutes, the doors banged open to a fairly drunk Bakugou. It was rare to see him so drunk, not that he can hold his liquor well but simply because... He barely drank at all. Sure, he would drink here and there, but it was usually during occasions and it wouldn't even reach a glass full. 

"Oi, you're still here?" Katsuki called him out. He just stared for a while, not giving any response at all. "Hah? You're ignoring me now? I'm asking you something, better answer it or I'll-"

"Yes. I'm still here." Shouto immediately replied. He didn't want to see Katsuki in this situation, more so that he doesn't want him to curse at a public place whilst being drunk. "Why?" The blonde seemed to have sobered up a bit, he had a serious expression on his face, but the tint blush of being drunk still gives him away. "Because you're still here. I promised you that when you're drunk, I'll drive you home." Without a change in his tone, he continues. "We should go now, you're not doing yourself anything good if you continue." Just then, Shouto heard a 'tch' and the car door for the front seat beside the driver, opened. 

He smiled a little to himself, knowing Bakugou, he'd usually pester more. Taking things into account, he knew why Katsuki was more vulnerable at the moment—his smile, fades. He continued on his quiet drive, he had already known Bakugou's address being that he's probably the third closest friend the man has and his usual drinking partner—that doesn't drink at all.

He looked to his side, seeing a sleeping Bakugou wasn't rare, but it was special for him. Why does he consider so? He doesn't know and yet, he doesn't mind at all. Another step on the gas and a few turns, they've arrived.

"Bakugou, we're here." He softly tapped the blondes' shoulder. As per usual, he doesn't wake up. So Shouto decides himself that he take on the responsibility of putting the man to an appropriate bed to rest on. The car door opens and Shouto scoops him out of the car, using his right leg to close the door as he tries to carefully carry Bakugou.

Once they've reached the door to his apartment, he has some difficulty in using the card, but with his experience? He can open the door with minimal tries. Again, he uses his right leg to close the door. Walking into the man's apartment has never been not comforting to Todoroki. 

The man's smell surrounds him, as if hugging him and forcing him to relax and take it easy on himself. Although he definitely should not be feeling like this because he's carrying the man himself. So he shrugged it off, walked to the bedroom and slowly placed Bakugou there and tucked him. He even gave a little tap on the shoulder and a soft smile before he walked out of the bedroom and locked the main door before exiting.

A few days pass by and no one speaks of the matter, not even a thank you was heard from the blonde. But Shouto doesn't mind it. For God's sake he can't even think of a reply to that besides a little tap which Bakugou clearly dislikes on the outside, but Shouto knows he doesn't mind it on the inside.

Now they're in front of a meal, a dinner to be exact. Shouto is there, happily eating cold soba and across from him was Bakugou, eating his self-made dinner with tofu and veggies. 

If he could, he would've pulled out his phone and played some music for the both of them, a song then suddenly played on his head Reflections by The Neighborhood was the song. He just resonates with the music so much, not with the current setting, but his current situation. 

"Maybe it's a blessing in disguise, I see my reflections in your eyes."

A quote he took from the song, the same quote that he thinks about when he holds an odd eye contact with the blonde. It was always when talking about Midoriya, his eyes always shines bright. And Shouto would be lying to himself if he's never felt something negative about that. Surely, he knows within himself that he also wishes that Bakugou would have the same reaction when talking about him to another, but it's unlikely. 

But the blondes' eyes were so brightened by their topic that he could see himself with how it glimmered. Unknowingly, his hands would travel to his chest, and to his heart. He felt it beating, but it was in pain. Why is it so?

"Oh hey Bakugou! How has life been lately?" Kirishima walks up to him, overjoyed that they got to catch up even though they're all busy with their own adult life. "Nothing. It's normal. Have you seen icy-hot?" He asks, clearly not interested in talking about his personal life. "Oh, you don't know? Today is his older brother's death anniversary. So he took a short leave." Kirishima replies, walking along with the blonde that seemed to have just come to a realization. "Alright. Bye." The man then turns a right and walks off. Leaving Kirishima alone, not turning his back or acknowledging the short reply see you later!

He goes back to his house, a cold and ordinary one. It was quite large to accommodate one person. He did want a certain someone to move in here with him, but he only got a rejection. Now he spends his depressive days in this ice block of a house, not actually admitting to himself that he's being depressed, he just rests—of course under the pretext of being tired emotionally and mentally from all the stress of work. 

He thinks to himself, now that Izuku has a partner for life, he doesn't know what to do. He's planned out most of his life with Izuku. And now that he's out of the picture, he feels empty. But not entirely, in the recent days icy-hot was there to bug him about everything. On the outside he seemed annoyed about it. But on the inside, he feels grateful to have someone treat him indifferently although knowing about the things that had happened to his life.

He's glad he could still count on someone that wouldn't feel bad about him, and he's glad it's Todoroki.

Deep in his thoughts, a knock has heard. He stood up and walked to open the main door. Only to see the man he's been thinking of just now, Shouto Todoroki.

"Ah, Bakugou. You looked for me?" He asks, his tone a little hesitant. But it also had a hint of excitement. Bakugou let him in, "I did." He adds a nod. The taller guy, namely Shouto, immediately sat on a chair in the living room. Feeling at home without having Bakugou telling him to do so. He looks at the blonde and pops a question. "So, now that I'm here, did you need something?" 

The blonde walked to the kitchen, opened his fridge and cussed under his breath. He barely had food in there. So he closed it and walked towards the living room. He looked at Todoroki and said, "Let's watch a movie. I'm bored doing so alone." 

Todoroki's eyes somehow brightened up because of the proposal. He was happy inside that he almost slipped out a smile. "Alright." He says with a nod. But his eyes follow the blonde to the door. The blonde makes eye contact and opens the door, "Let's go get groceries first. Help me."

Chapter Text

"Bakugou, what do you think your situation is right now?" Todoroki asks, curious if he could ask him this personal question, to find out if he has been closer to him than what he actually knows on the outside. It had been a few days since he was invited to the blondes' house and so they kept in contact, a hello here and there, small texts but nothing out of character, it all seemed casual. 

"My situation? Why would you ask that icy-hot?" Bakugou replies but pauses, he didn't want the man to respond so he put his finger over Todoroki's lips to shut him up. He continues, "But, from what I can see for myself, I'm in the stage where I'm healing. Although it is somehow slow, I think it's better than a week or so before. And I realized, it was faster than I had expected, because you were there beside me, most of the time. Kirishima helped, but didn't stay as much as you did." And after his statement, he pulled away his hand that was still connected to the man's lips as he sighs. "I'll cook you dinner as thanks, I guess?" Bakugou raised an eyebrow, he didn't really think he'd say that, or even thank the guy. It was all too out of character for him, but a little change doesn't seem to hurt?

Too shocked to even utter a word, Todoroki could only nod in response. He felt his heart beat fast, the words keep repeating in his head, you were there beside me, most of the time. He couldn't help but smile warmly. Of course, being so obvious to other man's eyes in the room, he got asked. "What are you smiling for? This is just a one-time thing. Ask for another next time and you'll die." The man doesn't glare, instead he avoids meeting the taller man's eyes. Katsuki turned, and walked away; expecting a man nicknamed icy-hot to follow him without being told. 

Katsuki's kitchen was clean as if it was just installed. It was fairly close to the table that could cater four people. It was wide enough for even more people, though there were only four seats. 

Katsuki then tells Shouto to sit and wait for the food, he goes to the fridge. "What do you want?" He asks without sparing the other a glance. "Soba." He replied instantly. "Again? Don't you get sick of it?" Their conversation continues until Katsuki finally finishes and serves the food to the table. "There. My thanks. Now eat it." He said it like he was forced to, and yet it was gentle. "Why don't you eat as well?" Todoroki asks, taking some and placing it on his own plate. "Not hungry." Then Katsuki takes a seat across from him. 

Todoroki eats heartily, like a little kid being gifted his favorite food that he could only eat once in a while. Katsuki just stared at him, his brain betraying him as a small smile creeps out of his lips. The other doesn't catch on to this, but stops eating. "You want some?" 

"No." Bakugou replied instantly. "But it's really good." Todoroki kept pushing. "I know, I cooked it." The blonde said it with a devilish smile. "If you don't eat I'll feed you myself." Bakugou hesitated, but he managed to spit out some words. "Icy-hot no." Todoroki was not budging unfortunately, "Yes." He took his chopsticks and made a serving for the cook. He then gave it to the blonde and smiled. "It's really good." Katsuki could only sigh in defeat.

After dinner Todoroki takes his leave, though he doesn't want to, he needs to show respect for the blonde. So he waves goodbye before getting to his car, Katsuki wanted to properly see him off. But Todoroki rejected the offer. 

Once he reaches his home, he does his own nightly routine and flops on the bed. Exhaustion finally catching up to him, he stares at the ceiling. "I don't think I'll be able to have any trouble sleeping tonight." He says, grinning to himself as he remembers the dinner he treasured so much.

A month passes by without a problem, just a villain here and there, nothing too serious. Todoroki however, has his own problem. No matter how much he tries to close the distance with a certain blonde man, the said man would catch a glance of his failed first love and sink deeper into his sorrows, though he had somewhat made a progress on moving on, it was as if he tried to shoot a car with a weak gun, it could barely dent it.

Now they were sitting across each other, at an ice cream shop they both liked. Suddenly, the taller man had an idea- a compromise. "Bakugou, would you like to go to the beach with me?" He asked out of context and Katsuki almost choked on his ice cream. "All of a sudden icy-hot? Sure, just during our day offs. We don't want to come back running here half naked." 

Todoroki beamed, the man actually agreed to his idea. And soon after, they started packing. Then on their said two-day off, they headed out. With no one else tagging along. Not even Kirishima was invited.

"Who's gonna drive?" Katsuki asks, eyes staring at Shouto's. "U-uh. You?" Todoroki blurts out as he processes that the man was giving him his full attention, and he felt too full, too glad, too seen. He turned his head out of embarrassment and just heard a light chuckle. "If you want to be a passenger princess, just say so. I'm always ready to be your driver." If hearts could burst like a balloon with too much air, Todoroki's heart would've done so, why would Katsuki say such a line in the most attractive way? Especially after a chuckle?

Once Shoto got to the front seat beside Katsuki, they headed out and finally enjoyed their little roadtrip, even if they were alone. The radio was blasting an old, yet timeless classic. Something both don't usually listen to, because of it's record of being cringe for teenagers back when they were still of the same age. "Tonight the music seems so loud," Shouto found himself singing through small giggles. 

"Baby, it's better this way. We'd hurt each other with the things we want to say." Katsuki chimed in, his deep, rough voice creating a harmonious tone with Shouto's own deep tone. Though the song was Careless Whisper, never did it lose to new songs of the season, because a timeless classic, will always be a timeless classics. No matter how cringe people make it out to be.

Finally reaching the beach, they set their things not too to the water, but not too far as well. It was the right distance. There was no intended space for parking, so it was okay to park close to the shore, so they opened the back on the car, pulled out the things they'd packed and set up the car as their own little moving house. 

After finally setting it up, they took their time to slap on some sunscreen. No matter how much you'd like to have fun, with Bakugou around... No one can touch the water without getting nagged at for not wearing any sunscreen. And that's what Shoto received, an earful of the negative effects of the Sun. Seeing Bakugou yap like a nerd made him crack up while the other stopped nagging and just stared at him confused, wondering why on earth would an icy-hot laugh at someone nagging him to wear sunscreen. "You know, ice does melt under the sun- hey? Why are you still laughing?" Bakugou adds. 

"Nothing. It's just I'm not an ice cube, I won't actually melt under the sun Bakugou-" But the other man cut him off. "Katsuki." He says. "Call me by my first name. You're too formal to be laughing at me the first second, then still calling me by my last name on the next." He adds. His arms crossed, intently staring into Todoroki's eyes yet again. 

Todoroki froze, not once did he ever imagine such a thing would happen. Him? Addressing Bakugou as his first name? Katsuki? A sudden heat pooled to his cheeks, he turned his head so fast he was thankful he didn't have a whiplash. But he could hear his heart beating, even without putting his hand to his chest. Was Bakugou being serious?

"If you don't want to, go ahead. At the end of the day, I'll still force you anyway." Katsuki says, eyes still locked at the other. Shouto slowly looked at the other man again, and there it was. His reflection again, but how did the other's eyes glimmer without Midoriya as their topic? 

He smiles, "Alright... Katsuki. Why don't we swim?" Then a thought popped up. Maybe it's because he's finally moving on. Then another thought rose, what was he truly feeling? Those sudden, fast paced heartbeats, face reddening and heating up just because of Bakugou. 

Yes. Because of Bakugou. 

"My dear son, Shouto. Don't you think it'll time for you to finally find someone and settle down?" Rei, Shouto's mother asks. She was healing better, after finally accepting the things around her, slowly forgiving but never forgetting what her own husband did to her and the children they had together. It wasn't easy, it was supposed to be a flat road, she just walked slowly. But now it became rough, but she's moving swiftly. All because her eldest grew up, but before they could even have any sort of reunion, the said child had passed.

"Mom, I'm already settled down." Shouto replies, eyes devoid of any other emotions other than confusion. "Silly child, don't you have someone to love?" Rei looked at her son, raised her hand and slowly brushed his hair. "Once you do so, you have to tell me first, alright?" Shouto nodded, no answer to her request. He doesn't even know what it all meant, wasn't he just satisfied with this life already?

"Mom... What does it mean? To love." Then Rei remembered, her poor son had focused so much in his father that he couldn't process what romance was. Of course, he was a smart boy, he excelled in science, english, mathematics. But never love. She just gave him another small smile. "Once you start falling, you'll remember their parts, some that others may not have noticed, but you did. You'll even start to want to be around them more often than not, and it all comes down to your face heating up, heart beating fast. Once they do certain things such as smile, hold your hand, or even just stare at you. My darling Shouto, once you feel those... Then you are falling in love my dear."

"Earth to icy-hot?" Todoroki snapped out of his trance, he remembers now. What his mother had said, "Yes, I'm sorry for spacing out." He smiles, suddenly grabbing Bakugou's hand and dragging him close to the shore. Then he asks him, "Do you trust me?" 

"Why are you even asking? I wouldn't let you drag me if I didn't-" Katsuki felt his body being lifted. He was being carried by the half and half, they're running towards to sea. Sometimes he wonders, how would such a man carry him who was obviously bulkier, with such ease. 

Funny enough, Shouto finally knew what was the mystery feeling he always felt around Bakugou. Which made his mood even better, he smiled a little wider, and announced in his head. If this is what his mother meant, then he is in love with the Bakugou Katsuki. But, even if it isn't. He is hopeful that it is. 

He felt a pair of strong arms snake around his neck, which made those parts burn with the knowledge that it was Bakugou's arms. That alone made his heart beat louder, fast, stronger. Sometimes he wonders, could Katsuki feel this too? He doesn't know. Then another question comes, which would be stronger? The heart that's been pounding because of love, or the crash of the waves?

Water then crashed with their bodies. Both were wet, but no one was disappointed. The cool water under the scorching hot sun was a perfect contrast of each other. Just like the both of them, one so destructive, the other too nonchalant. 

He was finally placed on the water, feet meeting the cold sand beneath the sea. A single thought lingers. 

If this is what he and I would always do, then I am hopeful. Maybe spending time with icy-hot isn't so bad as I had thought.