Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

Lumine has added 10+ students to unnamed groupchat

Venti has renamed the groupchat to psychiatric waiting room

psychiatric waiting room

Sat, 12:19 AM

Lumine: why do u get to choose the name???

Aether: bruh i wanted to name it daddy’s fastest swimmers

Jean: absolutely not

Hu Tao: 💀

Venti: omg hu tao bestie

Hu Tao: omg venti bestie

Shinobu: oh, so you’re hu tao

Hu Tao: you know who i am???

Shinobu: yanfei told me about you

Hu Tao: oh no

Nilou: hello everyone!!! why are we all gathered here?

Venti: nilouuuu hiiiii

Venti: unofficial gay groupchat

Shinobu: makes sense

Shinobu: from what ik u all seem fruity

Furina: OMG VENTI BESTIEE

Venti: FURINA BESTIEE

Furina: ZHONGLI BESTIEE

Zhongli: Hi Furina

Hu Tao: FURINA

Furina: HU TAO

Hu Tao: WHERE IS YOUR BROTHER (??)

Furina: mother

Hu Tao: my bad

Hu Tao: WHERE IS YOUR MOTHER

Neuvillette: Furina.

Hu Tao: HIIIII

Neuvillette: Hello, Hu Tao

Neuvillette: Furina. I am not your mother

Furina: ofc ofc

Furina: …mother

Neuvillette: Furina.

Lumine: not neuvillette giving birth at the ripe old age of four (??) years old

Neuvillette: Lumine.

Lumine: im sorry

Aether: nah that’s crazy

Aether: bro folded so fast

Lumine: perish

Jean: Lumine

Jean: is there a reason we are all in this groupchat?

Jean: I dont know everyone here. though i have a sinking feeling that will be changing

Nahida: I think this is a wonderful opportunity!! So many new faces!!

Wanderer: tf are you doing here?? arent you like ten

Nahida: You know I am a lot older than that

Aether: Lumine why do we have an eleven (???) year old here

Aether: and why is bro named wanderer

Wanderer: what are you a cop? mind your damn business

Raiden: hello kunikuzushi

Wanderer: you dont get to call me that. go back to your country

Raiden: we are from the same country we are literally siblings

Wanderer: nuh uh

Tartaglia: IS THAT SCARAMOUCHE 

Wanderer: TF STAY AWAY FROM ME YOU ROACH

Tartaglia: EXCUSE ME???

Lumine: childe shut up

Tartaglia: bruh what

Lumine: i have created this group chat to make an announcement

Lumine: @everyone

Lumine: 🫵 gay

Aether: this is why your adopted

Lumine: stfu fuckmunch

Lumine: okay but fr who wants to see a video of Neuvillette beating the shit out of childe

Tartaglia: DELETE THAT

Hu Tao: SHOW

Furina: SEND

Venti: PLEASE

Lumine: [childgettinghisshitdestroyed.jpg]

Beidou: THIS IS THE SHORTEST FIGHT IVE EVER SEEN

Venti: LMAOAO PLEASE

Wanderer: pathetic

Sat, 4:38 PM

Venti: PARTY AT ZHONGLI’S DORM

Zhongli: excuse me??

Venti: youre excused!!!

Zhongli: bitch

Venti: fucker

Venti: anyways WHOEVER IS FREE TONIGHT IT WONT BE A CRAZY PARTY JUST DRINKING, A MOVIE OR TWO, AND TIPSY PRESENTATIONS

Venti: also i need to do my wordle before midnight so like

Lumine: not the wordle…

Ningguang: is there a reason youre taking over the geo dorms for this?

Venti: is it a crime to harass zhongli on the anniversary of the day we met?

Zhongli: yes

Aether: can i ask a question?

Zhongli: you just did

Venti: go ahead!!

Aether: are you two dating?? dont feel pressured to answer i was just curious

Lumine: ^^

Lumine: this totally has nothing to do with a bet we made

Aether: yes this is a very innocent question with no money at stake whatsoever!!

Zhongli: no

Venti: ew no

Zhongli: Ew?? The audacity. I am approaching your location as we speak.

Venti: LMAO NONONO IM SORRY

Venti: STAY BACK

Venti: please dont kill me im just a little guy

Lumine: why does he know your location

Aether: fellas is it gay to know your homie’s location

Beidou: its only gay if your feet touch

Zhongli: I will break all of the bones in your body and eat them Venti

Lumine: source?

Beidou: trust

Venti: I will rip out your intestines, turn it to a soup, and give it to ganyu!!

Ganyu: huh???

Zhongli: i will gouge out your eyes, rip out your spine, turn them into a necklace, and feed it to Albedo

Albedo: WHAT

Ganyu: WHAT DID WE DO TO YOU

Venti: sorry you were the first liyuean i thought of

Venti: well actually i thought pf xiao first but he might murder me so

Zhongli: I don’t know many Mondstadtians so I picked the first name on the list. No hard feelings Albedo.

Amber: didnt albedo eat a spider once

Albedo: shut up it was for science

Jean: what is going on here

Albedo: haven't you ever wondered how a spider tasted like? it actually wasn’t as bad as i anticipated

Jean: nvm I hope to never see you again

Jean: i will talk about all of you in therapy

Albedo: fair

Venti: anyways who’s joining

Venti: Xiao you have to come

Xiao: I was going to go anyways??

Venti: just making sure!!

Venti: Ganyu? Keqing? Beidou? Ningguang will be there

Ningguang: says who

Venti: it’s your dorm building?? also im bringing the good wine

Ningguang: okay I’ll stay then

Keqing: can we have charcuterie

Beidou: do you have snacks

Ganyu: can we make our own charcuterie board

Venti: idk if me and zhongli can afford all that

Ningguang: it’s not that expensive???

Venti: you underestimate our brokenness

Lumine: can i come?

Lumine: also just ask childe to buy shit

Xiao: NO

Venti: omg ur right i forgot about zhongli’s sugar daddy

Xiao: gouging my eyes out as we speak

Aether: yummy

Xiao: blocked

Aether: im sorry it was the demons

Lumine: youre a demon

Aether: bitch and youre adopted

Venti: @Tartaglia

Venti: now why isnt he responding ik he aint busy

Venti: @Tartaglia

Venti: @Tartaglia

Venti: @Tartaglia

Tartaglia: WHAT 

Venti: heyyy

Venti: can you send mora to buy charcuterie materials and other snacks for a small party

Venti: an intimate get together if you will!!

Tartaglia: no just stop being broke

Venti: damn guess imma tell zhongli we’ll have no charcuterie or snacks

Tartaglia: how much

Venti: 1000 mora

Tartaglia: 10000 mora sent to your account

Venti: aww ty!! wanna join?

Tartaglia: i would love to

Venti: great!! 50 mora for entry

Tartaglia: 500 mora sent to your account

Lumine: wtf

Venti: WOOO OKAY CHARCUTERIE AND THE GOOD SNACKS HAS BEEN SECURED

Venti: now where is Hu Tao

Hu Tao: here!!

Venti: okay good we’re all set for the people who are required to come

Venti: if anyone else wants to join just show up at the geo dorm building. snacks are welcome

Venti: nothing too crazy tho

Sun, 1:30 AM

Venti: the little party was fun but i need an outlet for all of my prospective shenanigans

Hu Tao: did somebody say shenanigans?

Venti: bestie!!!

Hu Tao: bestie!!!

Yanfei: this is my cue to mute notifications so i can have plausible deniability!!

Hu Tao: ilyt bbg

Hu Tao: anyways back to prospective shenanigans

Venti: @Furina

Furina: cant wait to get into shenanigans

Furina: what are we doing

Hu Tao: we should make a separate gc for the plotting

~*~*~*~

~*~*~*~

Hu Tao has added 3 people to unnamed groupchat

Hu Tao has renamed the groupchat to pikmin groupchat

pikmin groupchat

Sun, 1:33 AM

Furina: ???

Hu Tao: i lied

Hu Tao: put your clothes back on and get into gear besties we’re playing pikmin bloom NEOW

Furina: what’s pikmin??

Hu Tao: i am so glad you asked

~*~*~*~

~*~*~*~

psychiatric waiting room

Sun, 1:33 AM

Kirara: is anyone else feeling unsafe?

Gorou: oh definitely

Kokomi: while I dont think they would bring intentional harm to their friends, Hu Tao, Venti, and Furina make for a terrifying combination

Keqing: what is venti talking about the party was NOT fun

Kokomi: did something happen?

Kokomi: Gorou were you there?

Gorou: no i left the moment i knew childe was coming over. like a sane person

Gorou: he always tries to get me or itto to fight him so i convinced itto to stay with shinobu and im with kazuha rn

Gorou: anyways imma gts now. gn!!

Kokomi: goodnight!!

Kokomi: so childe was the problem

Xiao: when is he not

Kokomi: typical. What did he do this time

Venti: xiao’s and kokomi’s beef against childe goes crazy

Kokomi: he knows what he did

Xiao: he tried to fight you during the party

Venti: yeahh but he didn’t bc you were there <33

Venti: mmy kightn in shining armortyuihkjii

Kirara: is he okay???

Keqing: he passed out mid text

Keqing: Xiao is carrying him back to the anemo dorms now

Kirara: aww that’s so sweet of him

Beidou: ihad a BLASTS

Keqing: YOU VENTI AND KAZUHA KEPT ON SINGING PIRATE SONGS

Keqing: YOU FOUGHT CHILDE IN THE PARKING LOT

Keqing: YOU AND VENTI HAD A DRINKING CONTEST WHICH NONE OF YOU LOST OR WON

Beidou: he hash a strong alchol toleranc

Ningguang: it’s okay darling you did very well

Beidou: NINGNING HII

Ningguang: come to bed now love

Keqing: gay

Beidou: ye

Ganyu: idk i had a good time

Keqing: actually now that i think about it the party wasnt that bad

Venti: gay

Beidou: gay

Mon, 11:35 AM

Furina: first day of classes and theyre making us do work?!?

Kaeya: the audacity

Furina: THANK YOU

Furina: Neuvillette just looked at me as if i was crazy

Yun Jin: no bc why are we doing work on the first day of classes

Yun Jin: we should only be going over the syllabus and wearing our cutest fits

Kaeya: right

Amber: then after that we can wear whatever we want to our classes

Amber: tmr im going in my running clothes

Layla: im going in pajamas tmr since I’ll end up falling asleep anyways

Kaeya: couldnt be me

Kaeya: if i do not look my best every day i will simply die

Chiori: fr

Chiori: im majoring in fashion for a reason

Furina: no but why do i already have three assignments due. ITS THE FIRST DAY

Hu Tao: hop right over to the wangshen funeral parlor!!

Hu Tao: i assure you all of your problems can be solved with the right amount of coffins!!

Yoimiya: or fireworks!!

Zhongli: And you still wonder why the two of you are banned from most of the buildings here

Thoma: they’re not even allowed in the same parties

Lyney: right like if yoimiya shows up first they turn away hu tao

Hu Tao: they hate women i fear

Chapter Text

Time for takeoff!

Wed, 2:22 PM

Jean: whose cat is this

Jean: [kittyinabowtie.jpg]

Jean: you know we cant have cats in this building

Heizou: that’s crazy

Jean: Heizou.

Heizou: IT WASNT ME DAMN

Lynette: sorry i brought that cat here

Lynette: i named her Bonnie

Jean: why would you let her in???

Lynette: I want to find her owner

Jean: Lynette.

Lynette: Jean.

Heizou: oh shit

Wanderer: heizou istg

Jean: I want Bonnie gone by the time I get back

Jean: you know Venti is extremely allergic

Lynette: fine I’ll take her with me

Jean: thank you

Thu, 3:33 PM

Jean: there is another cat here

Jean: Lynette.

Lynette: it was not me this time

Jean: oh I’m sorry for accusing you then

Jean: Scara.

Wanderer: IM OMW BACK DAMN

Kazuha: are you not gonna show the cat???

Jean: [scarameow.jpg]

Heizou: omg its the infamous scarameow

Heizou: how come i havent seen him yet :((

Wanderer: he doesnt fw u

Heizou: well fuck him too

Fri, 4:44 PM

Venti: ONE OF THE CAT LOVERS COME HELP

Venti: IK ONE OF YOU HAS OT BE ONLINE CMON

Xiao: whats wrong

Venti: IM BEING CHASED. PURSUED. FOLLLOWD. STALKED. PLEASE THE CATS WONT LEAVE ME ALONE

Lynette: im omw

Wanderer: omw

Xiao: i’ll be there in less than a minute

Xiao: STOP RUNNING I CANT HELP IF YOU KEEP ON SPRINTING AWAY

Wanderer: wOuLdNt gLiDiNg bE fAsTeR

Venti: NONONONONONOOONONOO

Venti: OMGOMGOMG THEYRE GAINING

Venti: SHITJSKFSLVAL

Jean: is he okay???

Lynette: a cat lept from the balcony of one of the dorm buildings and landed on him. He caught it instinctively and sneezed so hard his phone went flying

Wanderer: LMAOO IT HIT KAVEH

Faruzan: NO NOT KAVEH HE WAS MY FAVORITE OF THE DENDROS 😭😭😭

Kazuha: he shall be missed but never forgotten 🫡

Sat, 5:55 PM

Jean: WE CANT KEEP DOING THIS

Jean: [monsieuros.jpg]

Jean: WHO’S CAT IS THIS

Xiao: what would you do if it was me who snuck in the cat

Xiao: asking for a friend

Venti: the betrayal is going crazy rn

Wanderer: just like ur allergies

Venti: just like my allergies!!!

Venti: hey now

Jean: xiao….

Xiao: …his name is osse

Lynette: osse is very cute

Faruzan: he reminds me of candace ngl

Jean: Xiao.

Xiao: im bringing him to the animal shelter tmr i just snuck him in to get him bc he kept following a certain someone

Venti: the victim blaming is going crazy rn

Heizou: why do cats love you so much

Venti: i dont knowwww but they need to leave me aloneeee i hate allergies

Venti: im just gonna stay at the geo dorms tonight

~*~*~*~

~*~*~*~

Dms: Venti, Zhongli

Sat, 6:01 PM

Venti: hey pookie

Zhongli: No

Venti: PLEASE LET ME SLEEP IN YOUR DORM JUST UNTIL THE CAT IS GONE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE

Zhongli: That sounds like a difficult situation. Too bad that is not my problem.

Venti: im telling guizhong

Zhongli: fine

Venti: YES TY TY TY TY

~*~*~*~

~*~*~*~

Time for takeoff!

Sun, 9:48 AM

Xiao: @Venti the suite is safe now

Venti: ty love 😘

~*~*~*~

when the snow is thick enough, we can eat it

Sun, 9:50 AM

Xiao: HES SO CUTE THIS ISNT FAIR

Zhongli: what did venti do this time

Xiao: he called me love

Ganyu: did it have an emoji next to it

Xiao: yeah the kiss face one

Hu Tao: he’s clearly crazy in love with you

Shenhe: you should ask him out

Xiao: no i will suffer

Shenhe: i hate you

Shenhe: gay people should burn

Zhongli: Shenhe…

Hu Tao: omg discount for all the gays burning rn at the wansgen funeral parlor!!!!

Ganyu: one day youre both going to get canceled and yanfei wont be able to save you

~*~*~*~

~*~*~*~

Time for takeoff!

Mon, 7:59 AM

Wanderer: praying on venti’s downfall once again

Jean: what happened this time

Venti: i opened the curtains and accidentally woke him up

Wanderer: i dont want to wake up early unless i absolutely have to

Jean: when are your first classes?

Venti: 9 am!

Wanderer: 11:30 am

Heizou: well thats not fair

Heizou: now im praying on ur downfall

Wanderer: good

Wanderer: if you pray hard enough maybe you’ll find where the fuck i asked

Heizou: open your door i just wanna talk 🥰🥰

Lynette: it’s too early for you guys too be this stupid

Mon, 8:37 PM

Jean: I made some pizza with some friends in the student kitchen. There’s some in the common room so help yourselves!!

Faruzan: don't mind if i do!!

Venti: everyone say thank you jean

Heizou: thank you jean

Lynette: ty jean

Faruzan: tysm jean

Jean: Venti I also have some extra chicken noodle soup since ik you dont like cheese

Venti: JEAN OMG TYTY 🙏🙏

Venti: HELP HOW DID YOU KNOW I WAS CRAVING SOUP 

Jean: i did not. all of the students in the cryo dorms are sick rn so Lisa and I made soup for our friends

Faruzan: awww

Venti: lmaoo did they get…a cold

Jean: Venti.

Jean: go eat your soup

Venti: okay 😔

Faruzan: you sure you don’t want any pizza? there’s plenty left

Venti: oh no I’m good

Venti: i cant stand gooey textures like cheese

Lynette: more for us then

Wed, 3:21 PM

Venti: guyss guess what me and kuni bought

Lynette: wine?

Venti: the lack of faith is hurtful Lynette

Lynette: you’ll recover

Wanderer: no we did not get wine

Venti: we did get a nebula projector tho!

Wanderer: now jean cant say we didnt contribute to the technology list

Jean: …when i suggested someone buy a projector for the suite I meant like, a projector to display movies or tv shows….

Venti: …ehe?

Wanderer: oh

Heizou: cant believe you guys messed up that badly

Wanderer: cant believe i havent beaten the shit out of u yet

Venti: okay then me and kuni get to keep the nebula projector to ourselves!!

Wanderer: its a good thing we got a kettle as well then

Jean: ty for the kettle you two

Faruzan: can i see the projector when you guys turn it on?

Wanderer: yeah come over rn

Faruzan: !!!

Wed, 3:54 PM

Heizou: wait @Lynette what happened to Bonnie?

Lynette: oh she’s fine. Lyney and Freminet took turns looking after her

Lynette: we had to turn her over to the police tho bc turns out she was a piece of evidence for some sort of drug manufacturing and distributing scheme

Venti: a cat???

Lynette: yup

Venti: criminals sure are getting creative these days!

Venti: back in my day drug dealers were humans

Jean: Venti…

Venti: ehe

Thu, 1:02 PM

Kazuha: @Heizou can i borrow some of your hair clips

Heizou: yeah sure just go in whenever i left the door unlocked

Xiao: tf you mean you left our door unlocked 

Kazuha: k thanks

Kazuha: your room is horrendous 

Kazuha: how do you and xiao live like this

Xiao: i keep on telling him to clean his side of the room but he never does

Heizou: there’s a system trust

Xiao: our room is the messiest in this suite i get violently ill everytime i look at your mess

Heizou: well now youre exaggerating 

Kazuha: no i agree

Kazuha: your room is the messiest in our suite

Heizou: lies and slander!!

Venti: can i see the mess

Kazuha: yes join me

Heizou: wtf no if u invite venti kunichan will follow him

Wanderer: never call me that again or i will end your pitiful existence

Wanderer: your room is a hazard on so many levels how do you not trip over everything 

Venti: that is a lot of notebooks

Heizou: you can never have too many notebooks

Kazuha: usually i would be inclined to agree but fr i think you have too many notebooks

Xiao: i trip every morning why do you think im always mad

Wanderer: i thought that was just your personality

Xiao: blocked

Heizou: this is homophobia!!! leave my notebooks alone!!!

Venti: we’re all gay try again

Kazuha: are you saying gay people cant be homophobic

Wanderer: kys

Venti: WOAH?!??

Xiao: i was wondering when he was going to cave

Lynette: days since wanderer told us to kill ourselves: 0

Heizou: heizouphobia

Wanderer: yes

Wanderer: now go take a swan dive off the roof rn

Wanderer: maybe in your next life I’ll give a shit

Venti: KUNI

Heizou: 😔

Chapter Text

osmanthus wine tastes the same as i remember…

Sat, 5:31 PM

Arataki Itto: WHO HERE WANTS LEFTOVER DANGO

Gorou: I’ll have some!!

Chiori: I’d like some too

Navia: I baked some macaroons too!! We can all have dessert together

Yun Jin: I am approaching the dorms rapidly

Yun Jin: if the dessert is all gone i will be upset

Arataki Itto: DO NOT FEAR I ARATAKI ITTO WILL GUARD YOUR PORTION WITH MY LIFE

Yun Jin: <333

Ningguang: I would but I havent had dinner yet

Yun Jin: dessert for dinner once wont harm anyone

Zhongli: I was cooking with friends and I have enough leftovers for everyone. There is no need to spoil your dinner

Gorou: did you make a feast with your friends??

Yun Jin: damn

Yun Jin: I MEAN TY ZHONGLI 

Zhongli: I have enough leftovers for everyone minus Yun Jin*

Yun Jin: waIT NO

Yun Jin: I TOOK IT BACK?!?

Yun Jin: do you hate gay people or women be honest

Zhongli: the world may never know

Yun Jin: please I’m sorry I’ll do better

Yun Jin: HELLO??

Yun Jin: he hates women i knew it

Zhongli: I’m eating your dango

Yun Jin: WHAT NO STAY AWAY FROM WHATS MINE

Yun Jin: THERE WILL BE PROBLEMS

Gorou: it’s nice seeing zhongli torturing someone other than venti for once

Ningguang: Right. Spread the hate

Chiori: my favorite pastime right after throwing annoying customers out of my window

Sun, 12:09 PM

Chiori: why is there an ugly ginger in our common room??

Ningguang: oh you mean childe

Yun Jin: we think he’s zhongli’s boyfriend 

Gorou: if he’s not then he’s trying very hard to be zhongli’s bf

Chiori: oh he must be very obvious if even gorou noticed

Navia: fr

Navia: “your heart is beating and your face warms up everytime you see her?? You must be sick!! Go see the doctor immediately!!”

Navia: word for word

Gorou: hey now…

Chiori: were you talking about chlorinde again

Navia: …no comment

Yun Jin: anyways about childe

Yun Jin: we dont know for sure if hes his bf or not since zhongli never gives us a straight answer

Arataki Itto: LMAO “STRAIGHT”

Albedo: very clever of you yun jin

Yun Jin: 😘

Chiori: ew zhongli could do so much better than that

Ningguang: as his friends and suitemates we need to respect his horrendous taste in men

Chiori: 🙄

Mon 2:43 PM

Zhongli: There is someone named Yae Miko looking for Gorou?

Gorou: SHE FOUND WHERE I LIVE?!?!

Gorou: I AM NOT HERE YOU NEVER SAW ME EVER

Arataki Itto: WHY ARE YOU HIDING FROM HER

Chiori: why do you always use caps lock?

Arataki Itto: MY PHONE IS BROKEN AND I CANT REMOVE IT

Arataki Itto: BUT THATS OKAY THIS ADDS TO ARATAKI NUMERO UNO ITTO’S STAGE PRESENCE

Navia: it sure does!!

Ningguang: buy a new one?

Arataki Itto: AND GET RID OF ALL OF MY MEMORIES?? ARATAKI ITTO THINKS NOT

Gorou: me hiding??? nooooo

Gorou: this is a tactical retreat

Navia: does the mean lesbian scare you gorou :(

Gorou: NO

Gorou: SHE IS JUST HAS EVIL INTENTIONS IN HER HEART

Gorou: AND IM OFF THE CLOCK SO THERE’S NO REASON FOR HER TO WANT ME TO WORK ON THE MAGAZINE

Chiori: no gorou is better than me bc if my boss tried to look for me after hours I would throw them out the window

Ningguang: I can’t keep paying for your windows…

Chiori: it’s cute that you think that’s gonna stop me

Albedo: oh so I should not have told her that you usually frequent Komori Teahouse after classes…

Gorou: Albedo when I catch you

Gorou: so you’re against aro ace people

Albedo: im demisexual

Gorou: okay and

Chiori: So he’s dodging the question now

Zhongli: sounds acephobic to me

Chiori: very arophobic of him too

Gorou: right

Yun Jin: zhongli acting like he wouldn’t sell us out for 50 mora is insane

Zhongli: ah, so you’re also acephobic

Ningguang: that tracks

Yun Jin: NINGGUANG?!?

Chiori: ngl i expected chalk boy to be some sort of phobic

Albedo: hey??

Chiori: but not you yun jin

Chiori: shame

Yun Jin: CHIORI TOO

Yun Jin: man…

Wed, 11: 57 AM

Yun Jin: IF YOU DONT GO TO MY PERFORMANCE AFTER DINNER THEN I’LL EAT YOUR LIVER

Arataki Itto: ME AND SHINOBU WILL BE THERE TRUST

Arataki Itto: OH AND GOROU TOO

Gorou: i am??

Arataki Itto: YES THIS IS A KIDNAPPING

Gorou: i see

Gorou: guess i will be there

Yun Jin: YAY OKAY

Yun Jin: zhongli I’m telling guizhong

Zhongli: why does everyone have guizhong’s number

Zhongli: leave my guardian alone??

Yun Jin: no she’s my inspiration

Yun Jin: in fact bring her with you

Zhongli: i’ll bring hu tao

Yun Jin: NO SHE TOLD MY MANAGER THAT I SHOULD CONSIDER GOING INTO RAP AND THEN GAVE HIM A COUPON TO THE FUNERAL PARLOR

Zhongli: I know. I was there

Zhongli: your manager was getting on my nerves so i set her loose

Yun Jin: it was funny but please i think he popped a blood vessel

Zhongli: good for him. it builds character

Chapter Text

the campaign begins

Sat, 11:01 AM

Beidou: dont you love it when all of our periods sync up

Beidou: the blood of the covenant fr

Keqing: I skipped my period again

Beidou: shut up and die

Keqing: WOAH??

Shinobu: lets calm down now

Lisa: im telling ningguang

Beidou: woah there buddy no need to get hasty

Kujou Sara: WHY DO YOU KEEP SKIPPING YOUR PERIODS

Beidou: YEAH WHY WONT YOU JOIN US

Keqing: BRUH IDK

Keqing: im getting a bit worried its been two months since my last period 

Cyno: sometimes you’ll skip out of stress. that’s normal. however if you skip it for six months then you should go to the doctor

Keqing: ty cyno

Keqing: now wait a damn minute

Beidou: LMFAOO

Cyno: im trans

Keqing: oh right my bad king

Beidou: bro goes topless like everyday??

Keqing: i dont look at men

Keqing: no offense

Beidou: fair enough

Cyno: none taken queen

Sat, 1:11 PM

Keqing: EVERYONE LEAVE THE DORMS THE FIRE ALARM IS GOING OFF

Beidou: lmao i think it was from us

Shinobu: now who let Raiden cook

Kujou Sara: 😔

Keqing: officially banning her from the kitchen we cant live like this

Lisa: i saw what they were trying to make

Beidou: what was it

Lisa: idk it was so burnt it looked like dirt

Raiden: im not sure where i went wrong

Lisa: it was the moment you stepped into the kitchen

Beidou: thats crazy…

Keqing: me personally…

Raiden: 😔

Shinobu: has anyone seen cyno

Shinobu: i hope we didnt leave him in there

Raiden: A valid concern. He is quite short, making him easy to miss

Beidou: RAIDEN LMAOO PLEASE

Lisa: oh i see him. hes walking past the dendro dorms

Lisa: thats my little brother everyone look at him go

Beidou: emphasis on little

Kujou Sara: wow compared to the people next to him he is very small

Raiden: he is the height of a middle schooler

Beidou: keqing i see u typing. ur also short so dont even

Keqing: cunt

Sat, 1:33 PM

Cyno: I have seen the chat. You will be dealt with.

Beidou: SCATTER

Sat, 4:44 PM

Keqing added Clorinde and Sethos to the groupchat 

Beidou: welcome lesbians

Kujou Sara: it’s crazy how everyone here is a lesbian

Sethos: im a guy???

Sethos: i like men???

Raiden: shhhhhh

Clorinde: im happy to be here

Sethos: lemme out

Sethos: i demand freedom

Raiden: no

Raiden: suffer

Shinobu: we all like women*

Shinobu: no bi erasure kujou

Kujou Sara: im bi tho

Clorinde: are you saying bi people cant be biphobic sara

Sethos: nah thats crazy

Kujou Sara: man…

Lisa: oh so you’re sethos

Lisa: i have heard a lot about you

Sethos: and i know nothing about you!!

Lisa: you’ll meet me soon enough

Sethos: oh!! ominous!!!

Lisa: ;)

Cyno: dw she’s nice

Sethos: oh its you!!!

Cyno: do i know you?

Sethos: dw about it you’ll know me soon enough

Cyno: ominous…

Cyno: anyways I’m sure you all know what time it is

Keqing: NO

Kujou Sara: STOP RIGHT NOW

Cyno: are you trying to silence me bc im trans

Kujou Sara: STOP PULLING THE TRANS CARD

Cyno: no

Cyno: how did the pirate get her ship for so cheap?

Beidou: IM NOT A PIRATE THO?!?

Shinobu: right…

Keqing: okay pirate

Beidou: I GOT THE CRUZ LEGALLY

Beidou: FOR PERFECTLY LEGAL REASONS

Lisa: sweetie…

Lisa: the more defensive you get the less we believe you

Sethos: @Cyno how

Cyno: it was on sail

Sethos: oh

Cyno: do you get it?

Keqing: YES

Kujou Sara: there is no need to explain the joke

Sethos: yeah i think i got it 😭😭

Raiden: oh, I see

Raiden: the joke was amusing cyno

Cyno: did it make you laugh?

Raiden: a bit yes

Cyno: okay good

Cyno: mission accomplished

~*~*~*~

~*~*~*~

osmanthus wine tastes the same as i remember…

Mon, 11:02 AM

Navia: EMERGENCY

Navia: I NEED NEW CLOTHES

Chiori: you want me to make you new clothes already?

Navia: NO

Navia: I WAS TALKING TO CLORINDE AND SHE SPILLED HER ICED COFFEE ON ME

Navia: I NEED A NEW OUTFIT

Gorou: your door is unlocked right? I can get you a quick outfit and run to your building

Gorou: Asmoday Hall right?

Navia: YESS THANK YOU SO MUCH

Navia: I KNOW IT WAS AN ACCIDENT BUT IM A BIT PEEVED

Navia: IT WAS THE FIRST OUTFIT CHIORI DESIGNED FOR ME

Zhongli: it’s okay, it can most likely be washed in warm water. hotter water is typically better for stains, but warmer water is safer for your clothes

Gorou: zhongli is right!! also im omw!! eta 5 minutes!!

Navia: you’re a lifesaver gorou!!

Navia: and thank you zhongli!!

Yun Jin: i'm sure the outfit can be saved!! manifest it!!

Navia: you're right!!! the outfit will be fine. i will ask gorou to bring it back to the dorms for me

Zhongli: i can wash it for you. i plan on doing laundry with ningguang soon anyway

Navia: yes please thank you so much!!

Navia: i feel so relieved now!!

Navia: you know... it felt like clorinde was trying to tell me something important before she crashed into me

Ningguang: perhaps she was trying to ask you out on a date

Navia: she better!! ive been waiting for far too long

Gorou: i'm inside the building!! where are you

Navia: third floor gender neutral bathroom

Gorou: omw

Gorou: you know, you can just ask clorinde out

Yun Jin: rare moment of gorou giving good love advice

Arataki Itto: HE GIVES GREAT ADVICE

Arataki Itto: ASK HER OUT!! YOU GOT THIS

Navia: tysm everyone!! I'll ask her out after our classes!!

Navia: i think I can turn this in my favor

~*~*~*~

~*~*~*~

the campaign begins

Mon, 11:24 AM

Clorinde: the girl im in love with is mad at me

Clorinde: I want to die

Keqing: real

Beidou: REAL

Lisa: you poor thing

Lisa: you’ll work things out with her soon

Cyno: do you mind telling us what happened

Clorinde: i tried asking her out before our classes started since we were walking together

Clorinde: someone came by with a ladder and when i moved out the way i bumped into her and spilled my ice coffee all over her

Shinobu: you’re talking about navia aren’t you

Clorinde: yeah

Shinobu: i saw them talking about it in the geo gc. itto showed me it

Shinobu: i don’t think she is too mad at you. she seems mostly afraid for her outfit bc it is important to her. chiori made it for her

Clorinde: well now i feel worse

Shinobu: if you apologize and get her a gift im sure she will forgive you. then you can try asking her out again

Clorinde: alright. thank you shinobu

Shinobu: anytime

Mon, 2:41 PM

Clorinde: Navia forgave me and the dress was saved. we are going on our first date on Saturday

Clorinde: we asked each other out at the same time

Cyno: congrats

Beidou: WOOO I KNEW YOU COULD DO IT

Keqing: im glad everything worked out!!

Shinobu: be sure to tell us how the date goes

Clorinde: of course

Chapter Text

Everyone Hold Hands!

Wed, 7:42 PM

Kirara: guess who got locked out!!

Alhaitham: Kaveh?

Tighnari: kaveh?

Kirara: close! Me and kaveh!!

Alhaitham: Kaveh and I*

Kirara: i dont see u out here with us tho??

Alhaitham: …nevermind

Kirara: just let us in man 😭😭

Wed, 9:56 PM

Kaveh: someone please let me in im locked out again

Tighnari: you lummox

Tighnari: go ask your boyfriend

Alhaitham: Go back to fumbling cyno

Kaveh: WOAH??

Tighnari: go back to treading on eggshells with kaveh

Kaveh: EXCUSE ME??

Nahida: play nice…

Kirara: ur fumbling cyno???

Tighnari: NO IM NOT

Emilie: huh??

Alhaitham: he very much is

Tighnari: I DONT WANT TO HEAR SHIT FROM YOU

Tighnari: ALWAYS FUCKING AND ARGUING

Tighnari: I HAVENT SLEPT IN THE DORM IN THREE DAYS

Kaveh: WHAT NO NO NO

Alhaitham: okay and? just stop listening

Tighnari: one day i’m gonna snap and no one will find your body

Kirara: make kaveh a widow!! Im sick of them too!!

Alhaitham: it’s widower

Kirara: ik what i said

Emilie: wait are you guys finally dating??

Kaveh: NO

Kaveh: WHY WOULD YOU THINK THAT

Tighnari: take a wild guess

Tighnari: you guys make me want to commit crimes

Alhaitham: maybe if you weren’t fumbling cyno…

Tighnari: okay so that’s how it is

Nahida: please stop antagonizing each other!!!

Emilie: we’re supposed to be the normal and well behaved dorm

Kirara: soundproof the walls! Soundproof the walls!

Nahida: actually, that’s not a bad idea. I can bring it up at the next council meeting

Thu, 6:52 PM

Kirara: someone ordered a package!! I left it in the common room

Emilie: oh that’s mine

Kirara: why does it smell like chemicals

Kirara: do we have to worry

Emilie: :)

Kirara: understandable have a nice day

Fri, 3:43 PM

Nahida: guess what!!

Nahida: the dorms will be renovated!!

Kirara: SOUNDPROOF WALLS?!?

Kirara: KAVEH AND ALHAITHAM WERE GOOD FOR SOMETHING FOR ONCE

Kaveh: HEY?!?

Nahida: :)

Sat, 5:22 PM

Nahida: how do i convince someone to stop committing atrocities?

Kaveh: hat guy?

Nahida: hat guy!!

Kirara: i say we let him!! the atrocities build character

Tighnari: we dont want that kind of character

Kaveh: okay guys serious answer time

Kaveh: get him a boyfriend. maybe three

Tighnari: throw sticks at him

Nahida: still mad about the lightning?

Tighnari: why would i not be mad about the lightning

Kirara: get him a pet!!

Nahida: his dorm is pet free since venti is allergic to cats

Kirara: wait does that mean i cant go to the anemo dorms??

Kaveh: youre a cat?

Kirara: im a nekomata!!

Tighnari: no anemo dorms for you

Kirara: meow :(

Tighnari: stop that

Kirara: meow?

Mon, 4:58 PM

Emilie: i met cyno today!! we’re chem lab partners!!

Tighnari: how was it

Kaveh: any bad jokes

Emilie: nope. we were both focused on our work

Tighnari: yeah he usually doesnt tell any jokes unless it’s during his free time

Emilie: i like him. He already saved my life like three times bc i kept on trying to smell the chemicals and i would forget that i should not do that

Emilie: also he’s super smart and always knows what to do. the pre-med students are already big fans of him

Kaveh: that’s amazing actually

Kaveh: they gave him such a hard time at the akademiya

Tighnari: right. It was so infuriating

Emilie: no need to worry about that anymore!! I think the pre-med students would castrate someone if they hurt their guarantee of a good gpa

Tighnari: pre-med students piss me off

Kirara: werent you pre-med last year

Tighnari: ik better now

Kaveh: sure tighnari

Tighnari: go back to being in debt

Kaveh: this is why cyno is my favorite and not you

Chapter Text

pace yourself before you erase yourself

Fri, 10:38 AM

Candace: who flooded the bathroom

Yelan: childe

Kokomi: childe

Ayato: childe

Mona: childe

Nilou: childe!!

Neuvillette: childe…

Furina: @childe WHAT DO YOU HAVE TO SAY FOR YOURSELF

Tartaglia: oops?

Yelan: why is it always you

Candace: where are you

Tartaglia: now why would i tell you that

Mona: oh he’s at Good Hunter

Tartaglia: WHAT

Candace: you will be dealt with swiftly. I will inevitably cross paths with you again, and I will make you regret flooding the bathroom again

Candace: my shoes are ruined. Our carpet is ruined

Furina: SHIT THE CARPET

Neuvillette: I have spotted him.

Neuvillette: I have grabbed him. I will bring him back to the dorms to face our judgment.

Candace: thank you neuvillette 

Sat, 3:41 PM

Furina: isnt it crazy that we’re all some flavor of gay

Nilou: flavor??

Ayato: well that can’t be

Kokomi: thoma

Kokomi: itto

Ayato: kujou sara

Candace: okay lets all calm down

Candace: kokomi stop typing i already know im a lesbian

Kokomi: omg hii 🥰🥰

Candace: hiiii 😭😭

Tartaglia: i’m not gay

Furina: you are a man who likes men

Tartaglia: says who??

Furina: says me

Furina: just look at yourself

Mona: gay as hell

Yelan: fr

Tartaglia: IM NOT I LIKE WOMEN

Yelan: thats what they all say

Mona: zhongli isnt a woman (today)

Tartaglia: I DON’T LIKE ZHONGLI

Furina: 🤨🤨🤨

Kokomi: I KNOW WHAT YOU ARE

Kokomi: IVE SEEN YOU WITH THE SKITTLE SQUAD

Kokomi: YOURE A FRUIT

Candace: the skittle squad??

Furina: oh i love strawberries

Mona: she meant fruit as in gay

Furina: ohhh

Sat, 2:41 AM

Childe: nvm comrades mayhaps you were onto something

Childe: so i finally convinced zhongli to fight me right

Nilou: right!

Kokomi: how badly were you losing

Childe: hey now

Childe: youre right but at least pretend to have faith in me

Kokomi: no :)

Childe: anyways he had me pinned down with his foot on my chest and he was looking down on me like i was nothing

Nilou: …and

Childe: thats it

Furina: …that’s it?

Mona: QUICK PUT DOWN YOUR PHONES HE’S GOING TO SAY SOMETHING NASTY

Furina: dont need to tell me twice

Childe: HEY I WAS NOT

Childe: IT’S NORMAL TO WANT TO BE PINNED DOWN BY ZHONGLI HES OBJECTIVELY HANDSOME

Candace: during a fight?

Childe: i need him to beat the shit out of me again

Childe: for research purposes

Mona: right…

Mon, 8:23 PM

Furina: we need to do something together as a group

Furina: like going to the beach!! we can go surfing and look at the tide pools and play in the sand!!

Childe: i love surfing!!

Kokomi: ofc you do…

Childe: how did you make surfing seem like an insult

Ayato: my family owns a private beach house. i would not mind hosting an event there

Mona: your family owns a WHAT

Nilou: that’s very kind of you ayato :)

Ayato: we can invite many of our friends there. we have enough room. as long as nothing irreplaceable is broken or damaged

Kokomi: you hear that childe

Childe: WHAT DID I DO TO YOU

Candace: is it alright if i invite deyha and cyno?

Kokomi: since you’re probably going to invite itto for your twisted gay mind games i want to invite shinobu and gorou. is that alright

Ayato: of course you can candace

Ayato: you are on thin ice kokomi

Kokomi: :)

Kokomi: i already told them about the invites

Ayato: i will remember this

Kokomi: good

Furina: neuvillette is going to want to invite wriothesley (yeah i saw you typing) and i want to invite navia and clorinde. is that alright?

Neuvillette: i resent that

Ayato: at this rate we should just invite everyone we know. It would be much more efficient that way

Yelan: you just want to invite chevreuse because she’s ayaka’s friend but you dont have her contact information

Ayato: ah, so you do not want spicy dishes on the menu

Yelan: i will remember this

~*~*~*~

~*~*~*~

psychiatric waiting room

Mon, 8:55 PM

Furina: THE HYDRO DORMS HAVE AN ANNOUNCEMENT TO MAKE

Ayato: we will be having a beach party at the kamisato beach house. you are all welcome to come

Lumine: being friends with you finally paid off

Mona: right

Aether: LUMINE

Jean: MONA

Jean: i am so sorry on their behalf

Aether: idk lumine i never met that fucker in my life please do not uninvite me i can behave

Lumine: jump

Ayaka: it is alright. youre all still invited. youre our friends after all!!

Kujou Sara: you are willing to host all 60 of us?

Ayato: are you doubting our abilities

Chiori: just shut up and make a poll or something

Ayato: thoma

Thoma: alright alright…

Thoma has created a poll called “Beach Party”

Kaeya: when will this party be hosted?

Amber: RARE KAEYA APPEARANCE

Kaeya: rare amber appearance

Ayato: this saturday

Gorou: some of us are going rock climbing this weekend

Arataki Itto: ZHONGLI XIAO AND YANFEI ARE TAKING US HIKING AND ROCK CLIMBING IN LIYUE FOR THE WEEKEND

Shinobu: im joining them as well

Shenhe: is it alright if join

Arataki Itto: THE MORE THE MERRIER

Zhongli: venti is also coming

Venti: ????

Venti: since when

Zhongli: since now

~*~*~*~

~*~*~*~

Dms: Venti, Zhongli

Mon, 9:09 PM

Zhongli: i am helping you get alone time with xiao you ungrateful little shit

Venti: while usually i would appreciate that I DONT WANNA CLIMB THE MOUNTAIN

Zhongli: too bad. get your climbing boots

Venti: i dont have any??

Zhongli: ask xiao

Venti: kindly fuck off

~*~*~*~

~*~*~*~

when the snow is thick enough, we can eat it

Mon, 9:10 PM

Xiao: do you hate me zhongli be honest

Zhongli: i thought i was helping

Zhongli: you can hang back with venti as he struggles to keep up

Xiao: i hate you

Shenhe: oh, so we are playing matchmaker now. I see

Xiao: no. stop seeing

Zhongli: you can catch him if he falls

Hu Tao: xiao and venti sitting in a tree ~

Hu Tao: you better get your joint coffins from me!

Xiao: why are you like this

Zhongli: i’ve seen you do better poems

Hu Tao: i had ten seconds to come up with something!!

~*~*~*~

~*~*~*~

psychiatric waiting room

Mon, 9:11 PM

Aether: wait i wanna go on the hike too :(

Lumine: i do not

Lumine: i have a potential date with a cute girl

Yelan: jeht

Kaeya: jeht

Kokomi: jeht?

Cyno: jeht, right?

Lumine: WHAT THE FUCK

Lumine: HOW DID YOU ALL KNOW

Aether: i didnt even know…

Yelan: i like to be in the know

Lumine: ABOUT MY LOVE LIFE??

Nahida: some of us will be going on a nature hike in sumeru. so far it’s me, kaveh, tighnari, emilie, hat guy, kazuha, and heizou, but anyone is welcome to join

Sucrose: may i join?

Sethos: i would like to join too

Nahida: ofc you guys can!

Ayato: alright, does the following saturday work for the beach party then

60 people voted yes!!

Ayato: wonderful

Chapter Text

Aces and Aros

Tue, 1:26 PM

Venti: all rise!!

Diluc: tf you want

Gorou: is this about the funding request?

Venti: yesss guess who got our club money!!! 

Furina: YESSS TAKEOUT MONEY

Venti: we’re putting gorou and kaeya in charge of the club funding so direct the takeout requests to them!!

Venti: in the meantime we gotta plan our next activity

Gorou: since when was i in charge??

Venti: since now!!

Kaeya: well we certainly cant let zhongli be in charge of our budget

Zhongli: i resent that

Lumine: for our next activity we should fight to the death

Diluc: i would rather we dont

Layla: i would rather sleep

Layla: group nap

Lynette: group nap

Lynette: unless i get to fight lyney to the death

Lynette: he deserves it

Lumine: fr

Cyno: we can do a powerpoint night

Cyno: we’ve done it in the electro dorms

Venti: ouuu did you have fun  

Cyno: for a bit

Cyno: then they whipped out the hear me out cake and it got too unhinged

Furina: what was the worst person

Cyno: from the top of my head, Ei

Wanderer: MY MOTHER???

Lumine: SHE’S YOUR MOM??

Wanderer: we literally have almost the exact same face istg don’t make me go over there and knock sense into your empty skull

Lumine: archons my bad dipshit

Furina: anyone else??

Cyno: crepus

Diluc: WHAT

Lumine: something wrong?

Diluc: do not do this to me

Diluc: YOU KNOW THAT IS MY FATHER

Lumine: yeah lmaooo ik you look just like him

Wanderer: and you didnt know ei was my egg donor??

Venti: YOUR WHAT

Wanderer: you heard me

Lumine: listen

Lumine: actually idk i cant defend myself here

Furina: wait guys you know how gorou is ms hina

Xiao: how did that even happen

Gorou: i dont wanna talk about it

Wanderer: miko?

Gorou: I DONT WANNA TALK ABOUT IT

Furina: tragic

Furina: anyways you know how people keep on asking ms hina for love advice and shes super popular despite her being very aro ace and very bad at recognizing when someone is implying they want romantic or sexual advice

Gorou: they really didnt need all of that

Hu Tao: shhh let her speak

Furina: we should create our own group and help gorou give love advice

Lumine: Ms Hina’s Helpers!!!

Hu Tao: can we give comically bad advice

Furina: cant be worse than gorou’s

Kaeya: “Love is a battlefield! Strike first! Strike fast! Press the advantage! Confidence and a contingency plan are the keys to a successful battle!”

Gorou: STOP

Wanderer: okay but like fr ppl need to stop fucking around and just ask the person out problem solved

Cyno: yeah im tired of people being vague about it

Wanderer: okay but youre autistic

Cyno: that’s crazy coming from you

Cyno: venti what is the saying

Venti: pot meets kettle?

Cyno: yes that

Cyno: i know what you are

Cyno: mental illness personified

Wanderer: STOP

Wanderer: im fighting you to the death now

Lumine: FIGHT FIGHT FIGHT

Venti: let’s take this somewhere else!!

Wanderer: mario kart

Venti: fuck no

Cyno: genius invokation tcg

Furina: give the rest of us a chance??

Shinobu: what’s wrong with mario kart?

Xiao: wanderer gets way too competitive

Venti: he didnt even go easy against my brother

Venti: and he loves durin

Lumine: you didnt go easy on durin??

Wanderer: only thing i love more than durin is beating his ass in mario kart

Wanderer: ”hat guy let me win some” fuck no 

Wanderer: I’ll take a bullet to the brain for you before i take a koopa shell now pick the track you want to lose on

Hu Tao: 💀💀

Venti: i cant take him anywhere

Lynette: he’s like this in our dorm game nights too

Venti: wait we got off topic

Furina: what even was the topic

Chiori: furina.

Furina: OH RIGHT

Furina: Ms Hina’s Helpers

Furina: WHO’S IN

Venti: meee

Hu Tao: me me me

Wanderer: ofc the three musketeers are doing it

Venti: Kuni will also help!

Wanderer: WHAT

Wanderer: says who???

Lumine: says besti venti

Venti: ty besti lumi

Yelan: sign me up

Lumine: rare yelan appearance

Chiori: you hate romance

Yelan: yes but i like being in the know more

Kaeya: that tracks

Yelan: you should join too

Kaeya: you are plotting something and want me involved arent you

Yelan: :)

Kaeya: ominous

Kaeya: im in

Venti: yay!!

Wanderer: if im being forced to join then so is cyno

Cyno: swords at dawn

Wanderer: prepare to die

Venti: im surprised zhongli hasnt shown up to torture me

Gorou: and so your gonna summon him???

Venti: i like drama

Zhongli: ofc you do you obsessed little shit

Venti: hiii asswipe how’s guizhong

Zhongli: stay away from guizhong

Venti shared his location!

Zhongli: why are you in liyue

Zhongli: you will pay for this

Venti: xiao is with me too!

Venti: [ ventixiaoandguizhong.jpg ]

Layla: how did you get down to liyue so quickly??

Lumine: lmaoo how did you convince xiao to go with you

Venti: the power of being a menace to zhongli compels me

Zhongli: you will face my wrath

Venti: guizhong says hi!!

Zhongli: you will be dead by nightfall

Gorou: guys we still need a whole group activity

Kaeya: powerpoint night, escape room day, and game night

Gorou: sounds good. any objections?

Lumine: nope

Venti: nah

Gorou: okay i’ll get started on the reservations

Venti: see i knew putting you both in charge was a good idea

Gorou: why am i always put to work

Lumine: youre easy to manipulate

Gorou: HEY

Kaeya: i prefer to think of it as we’re dependable and wonderful

Kaeya: this way i feel less inclined to resort to violence

Gorou: compelling argument

Hu Tao: zhongli how’s the murder plans going

Zhongli: what murder plans

Zhongli: im sipping tea with them now

Xiao: [ ventixiaozhongliandguizhong.jpg ] 

Gorou: you were in hour dorms an hour ago how did you even??

Albedo: how fascinating

Zhongli: we’re on our way to harass cloud retainer now

Albedo: it seems being a menace has no limitations

Kaeya: your little sister is klee dont pretend you dont know that

Shenhe: tell mother i said hi and that i’m going home next weekend

Zhongli: of course shenhe

Chapter Text

Pyromaniacs

Wed, 2:11 PM

Yanfei: remember guys i’m heading down to liyue on friday

Yanfei: if you need me, don’t!

Lyney: oh dear, there goes my lawyer

Lyney: chat, is yours truly cooked?

Amber: maybe!!

Deyha: who’s your backup lawyer?

Lyney: uhh aether or lumine

Deyha: those two??

Deyha: your going to jail

Lyney: aw man

Chevreuse: aether’s going to liyue

Lyney: oh no

Lyney: i like lumine but she’s going to let me rot in jail

Chevreuse: she’s so real for that bc i too would let you rot in jail

Lyney: that’s crazy

Lyney: is it bc im queer

Chevreuse: no its bc youre a criminal

Lyney: is it bc im charming and talented

Chevreuse: can you read be honest

Lyney: im going to steal your wallet

Chevreuse: hu tao yoimiya get him

Yoimiya: yes ma’am!!

Hu Tao: prepare to be amazed twinkatron 5000

Lyney: TWINKATRON 5000?!?

Deyha: LMAOOO

Thoma: are there 4999 other twinks?

Hu Tao: no silly billy hillychurl

Hu Tao: each nation has one twinkiest twink tho

Hu Tao: lyney is for fontaine

Hu Tao: venti for mond

Yoimiya: inazuma is heizou

Lyney: shouldnt it be gorou?

Yoimiya: gorou has broken someone’s arm before and has flipped itto over his shoulder once i dont think he counts

Lyney: heizou has beaten up people before

Deyha: yeah but look at him

Lyney: yeah youre right why am i defending him

Thoma: what about liyue and sumeru

Deyha: kaveh

Deyha: i take no criticism

Hu Tao: why would i ever criticize you when youre completely in the right

Hu Tao: anyways liyue is my friend xingqiu

Hu Tao: then baizhu idc that he graduated he’s too fruity he deserves a shout out

Lyney: what about natlan

Yoimiya: i have only met mavuika so idk but from vibes alone it’s either kinich or ororon

Deyha: i saw ororon he looks like a sad puppy

Thoma: no i think it’s kinich

Chevreuse: they can have two twinks as a treat

Deyha: are you just saying that so we dont fight over it

Lyney: are you still mad about the microwave

Chevreuse: OF COURSE IM STILL MAD ABOUT THE MICROWAVE

Chevreuse: my fried food

Thoma: we still need a new microwave plate since someone didnt replace it

Lyney: uhh teehee?

Deyha: no

Lyney: my apologies

Wed, 8:43 PM

Hu Tao: going to my first college party

Hu Tao: gonna get waSTED

Deyha : on a wednesday night???

Yoimiya: IM ALSO GOING TO THE PARTY

Thoma: no your not

Yoimiya: ??

Chevreuse: you and hu tao are banned from going to the same parties remember?

Yoimiya: whAT

Hu Tao: oh yeah

Hu Tao: better luck next time!!

Yoimiya: man

Wed, 9:01 PM

Hu Tao: GUYS LUMINE, VENTI, KAEYA, AND ROSARIA ARE ALL HERE LETS GO

Hu Tao: cant wait to be a menace

Lyney: spot the diluc

Lyney: [ deeluke???.jpg ]

Yoimiya: oh thats a lot of people

Chevreuse: this is like where’s waldo but instead of the shirt we’re looking for the redhead

Yoimiya: [deelukespotted!!.jpg]

Yoimiya: i found him!!

Yoimiya: the secret is to look for a grumpy bartender

Lyney: time to wow the drunk crowd with my magic tricks

Chevreuse: dont rob them

Lyney: you never let me shine

Chevreuse: someone has to keep you in check when lynette isnt around

Lyney: i thought you liked my dazzling personality

Lyney: im hurt

Deyha: you’ll live

Chevreuse: you have your uses

Chevreuse: just not rn

Lyney: ouch

Wed, 10:37 PM

Hu Tao: guess who got into a bar fight!!!

Thoma: yk i always thought diluc was gonna be the first out of all of us to got into a bar fight, not hu tao

Lyney: guess who got arrested!!

Thoma: Lyney??

Lyney: wrong!! it was hu tao again

Lyney: diluc is bailing her out

Amber: yk i always thought diluc would be the first one out of all of us to get arrested 

Diluc: i resent that

Diluc: i would never do anything that would warrant my arrest

Amber: lying right to my face is crazy

Amber: i talk to kaeya u know i know about ur little trip to sneznaya or however u spell it

Yoimiya: shnezniya

Hu Tao: snezniyeah

Lyney: put your phone away you got us kicked out of the party

Hu Tao: boo whore

Thu, 9:01 AM

Hu Tao: first day of being a tour guide!!

Hu Tao: imma show them the cemetery

Diluc: youre going to get fired at this rate

Hu Tao: nuh uh!!

Thu, 1:01 PM

Hu Tao: so anyways i got fired

Hu Tao: 💀💀

Hu Tao: they could not handle my funky freak i fear

Diluc: sure

Diluc: i’m at the store do you want anything

Hu Tao: steamed fish with prawn dumplings!!!

Diluc: alright

Hu Tao: YEAHHHH

Hu Tao: i should get fired more often

Diluc: lets not

Amber: guysss im now a tour guide

Thoma: congrats!!

Hu Tao: take my spirit with you as you guide the guests through the school

Hu Tao: and know that you will simply never be iconic as me

Yanfei: true…it is gonna be hard to top being fired on the first day of being a tour guide

Amber: LOL no im trying to keep my job. I will remember you tho 🫡

Hu Tao: ty ty

Hu Tao: anyways it’s dumpling time

Thu, 5:51 PM

Deyha: candace and i are going home for the weekend so i wont be responsive if you guys need anything

Deyha: i wanted to let you guys know before i go radio silent tmr

Amber: how come?

Deyha: not a lot of cell reception in the desert i fear

Deyha: and the akasha only works in the rainforest so limited alternatives

Deyha: it’s easier to just limit usage to emergencies

Amber: ohh i see

Amber: that sucks

Deyha: yeah but not much we can do about it rn

Deyha: anyways as yanfei once famously said

Deyha: if you need me, dont!!

Deyha: and if yelan asks for my help again tell her i’d rather die

Amber: did she do something to you

Deyha: she got us in a car chase

Yoimiya: REALLY?!? THATS SO COOL

Amber: WHAT?!? ARE YOU OKAY

Lyney: two types of people

Deyha: im fine. i aged like ten years tho

Deyha: pretend im dead if she needs my help

Amber: you got it!!

Yoimiya: i hope your visit goes well!!

Amber: if you need us for anything at any point let us know!!

Deyha: ty ty

Thu, 6:01 PM

Lyney: MY DORM EXPLODED???

Lyney: THERE WAS A FIREWORK IN MY DORM

Yoimiya: you finally found it!!!

Lyney: YOU?!?

Yoimiya: im defending chevreuse’s honor

Chevreuse: i’ll get you some snacks as a treat

Yoimiya: !!!

Lyney: why cant i have someone defend my honor

Amber: Lock in!!!

Lyney: im trying 😭😭

Yanfei: pathetic

Lyney: YOU SPEAK ONCE THIS WHOLE DAY TO INSULT ME

Lyney: IS SHE GONE AGAIN

Amber: she’s gone again

Lyney: you guys are all terrible terrible

Yoimiya: and yet you love us

Hu Tao: you think we’re silly and entertaining

Hu Tao: it’s mutual btw

Lyney: good to hear!

Lyney: anyways if you dont pull up to my magic show tmr i’ll make you disappear

Chevreuse: and i’ll bribe yoimiya to place another firework in your room

Lyney: i only say that in jest!!

Thoma: isnt that illegal

Chevreuse: what firework? i have seen no such thing. yoimiya would never do something like that

Hu Tao: 💀💀

Thoma: that’s crazy

Thoma: anyways lyney i found your bird

Thoma: shes mine now

Lyney: GIVE BLANC BACK??

Thoma: [ doveinasweater ]

Thoma: i made her a sweater

Thoma: isnt she cute

Lyney: she’s a working lady how dare you

Thoma: stop leaving her around within stealing distance

Lyney: stop stealing my pets

Thoma: no

Chapter Text

psychiatric waiting room

Fri, 7:10 AM

Zhongli: doing hot girl shit

Furina: HUH

Hu Tao: 💀

Aether: HELLO???

Zhongli: kaeya, did i get it right

Kaeya: yes you did it was perfect

Zhongli: good

Zhongli: For those who may have misunderstood, I am a woman now. Please refer to me using she/her pronouns

Lumine: yes ma’am  

Zhongli: Good

Venti: the hot girl shit she’s doing is KIDNAPPING ME

Zhongli: wrong

Rosaria: is it really kidnapping if it was funny to watch

Venti: ???

Venti: YES

Zhongli: you are now on time for our trip

Zhongli: arent you excited :)

Venti: you dragged me from the cryo dorms :(

Venti: at least i get to take my flute with me

Lumine: aren't you rock climbing??

Aether: why were you in the cryo dorms

Venti: i was in the cryo dorms trying to avoid the trip, but it seems as if this is one event i cannot skip

Venti: with a journey so perilous and long, you never know when you may need a song 

Zhongli: streetward rambler has asked for our presence, so we will be visiting her home tomorrow

Zhongli: she explicitly requested venti be ready to play music, unfortunately

Venti: wdym unfortunately???

Gorou: and shenhe promised to guide me through jueyun karst. we’re gonna climb Mt Aocang together

Shenhe: master has recently moved into liyue harbor, but i still consider Mt Aocang home. i am looking forward to climbing it again

Yanfei: the rest of us are heading over to the chasm for our hike

Aether: oh i might run into you guys then!

Aether: i’m heading over to the chasm for my archeology project

Yelan: i’m traveling with him so he doesnt get lost

Yelan: that suspicious cousin of his is paying me a lot of mora to keep an eye on him and paimon

Yanfei: and on sunday we’ll all meet up again and take on cinnabar cliffs

Nahida: is everyone ready to go to sumeru?

Emilie: i’m making a separate chat this will get confusing fast

Sethos: good idea! i cant wait to see what dumb name it will get

Emilie: can we please give it a normal name

Heizou: absolutely not

Gorou: we should probably make a gc as well

Shinobu: dw im on it

~*~*~*~

~*~*~*~

Emilie has added 8 students to unnamed groupchat

Emilie has renamed the groupchat to one with the forest!

one with the forest!

Fri, 7:14 AM

Tighnari: hey now.

Emilie: is this a good name

Tighnari: why am i catching a stray so early in the morning

Emilie: i couldnt think of anything else sorry!

Tighnari: i will remember this

~*~*~*~

~*~*~*~

Shinobu has added 9 students to unnamed groupchat

Shinobu has renamed the groupchat to sonic boom watch party

sonic boom watch party

Fri, 7:15 AM

Aether: why

Shinobu: arataki gang watch party was last night aether

Shinobu: if you were a real one you wouldve known

Arataki Itto: DO YOU HATE SONIC??

Aether: i do not like the animation nor the characterizations

Yelan: okay nerd

Arataki Itto: ARATAKI NUMERO UNO ITTO HAS ONLY THE BEST TASTE 

Arataki Itto: MAYBE YOU JUST HATE FUN

Venti: cannot believe youre against whimsy and silly goofiness aether

Venti: for shame

Zhongli: perhaps some of us enjoy observing characters who are clinically braindead. Is that so wrong?

Aether: when you say it like that yeah

Xiao: let her speak

Zhongli: are you trying to silence women aether

Xiao: typical

Aether: i hate it here

Gorou: okay the animation budget may have been no more than five dollars

Gorou: but otherwise it was a fun watch

Aether: you were at the watch party?

Arataki Itto: OF COURSE HE WAS HES A REAL ONE

Zhongli: he is also the only one other than venti and i who are here at the designated meeting spot

Yanfei: shenhe and i are on our way!

Xiao: this one is with shinobu and itto, we will be there shortly

Aether: i’ll get ready for my project now. hopefully if i see you guys on saturday i’ll join you on sunday

Yelan: i’ll join but dont expect me to climb cinnabar cliffs. I’m not getting paid to do that

Yanfei: no worries. we’ll appreciate your company regardless

~*~*~*~

~*~*~*~

one with the forest!

Fri, 11:15 AM

Nahida: has anyone seen emilie and sucrose?

Nahida: i know we have all split up but they havent checked in with me yet

Tighnari: they wandered off to focus on collecting plants for their projects

Tighnari: i can find them if you want

Nahida: just check on them and remind them to turn on their location

Nahida: hat guy and i are going further into Chinvat Ravine, so we may not answer immediately. we’ll be sure to check in again by 2pm

Sethos: make sure to stay safe! i’m sticking with kazuha and heizou for now

Tighnari: kaveh is with me. we’re looking for emilie and sucrose at gandha hill

Sethos: not sure why you guys thought i could show kazuha and heizou around when i do not live in the rainforest but im doing my best

Sethos: we’re sticking by yazadaha pool for now bc it’s inspiring kazuha to make haikus

Kaveh: now that i think about it maybe that was not our best move

Wanderer: the akademiya’s finest…

Sethos: hat guy!!

Sethos: not you only showing up to drag people

Wanderer: i have my priorities straight

Wanderer: also i’m about to lose signal real quick. do not die while im not there to point and laugh

Tighnari: how touching…

Tighnari: anyway we should go to pardis dhyai tmr actually im sure kazuha, emilie, and sucrose would love it

Sethos: why did we not think of that earlier

Sethos: tighnari lock in!!

Kaveh: yeah tighnari

Tighnari: how about you turn off your phone and help me look for emilie and sucrose you lummox

Tighnari: sethos go back to kazuha and heizou

Kaveh: yes tighnari

Sethos: on it!

Fri, 12:10 PM

Sucrose: so sorry for worrying you guys!! Emilie and i wandered a bit too far and lost service for a bit

Sucrose: we’ll be sure to keep location sharing on from now on

Emilie: we found so many good samples though!

Sucrose: yes we did! we’re going to stick with tighnari and kaveh from now on though

Sethos: definitely for the better. we’ll probably make our way to you guys in like an hour or so

Sethos: you are definitely going to enjoy pardhis dhyai

Sucrose: what is that?

Sethos: tighnari can definitely explain it better than me because he used to do research there, but it’s basically a garden where amurta scholars often do their research

Sucrose: oh i see

~*~*~*~

~*~*~*~

Dms: Nahida, Wanderer

Fri, 12:17 PM

Nahida: i have opened the workshop

Wanderer: thank you

Wanderer: do i want to know what you did to allow us to still text each other without signal

Nahida: it involves breaking and entering

Wanderer: my favorite hobby

Nahida: have you found the bell yet

Wanderer: there is nothing left of this domain but rubble

Nahida: okay, find a good place out of sight to rest

Nahida: once i find you, i’ll send you to the version of the domain in the realm of dreams

Nahida: we can take daka’s bell from there

Wanderer: alright

Wanderer: i’ll find an alcove close to the center

Nahida: good, im omw

Wanderer: do we really need this stupid bell? 

Nahida: the bell is a magical artifact with many uses! i intend to use it to fix your body if you ever get too hurt

Nahida: i also believe that the workshop will have some of the answers you are looking for on how to become fully human. a new perspective may be all you need

Wanderer: whatever. just hurry up. we’re supposed to check in by 2

~*~*~*~

~*~*~*~

one with the forest!

Fri, 2:00 PM

Nahida: Hat Guy and I have exited Chinvat Ravine!

Nahida: we’re going to stop by gandharva ville for a bit before spending a few hours in Devantaka Mountain

Nahida: we’ll meet you guys back in gandharva ville in time for dinner

Tighnari: alright

Tighnari: we’re going to stay in the avidya forest for today

Kaveh: the akasha doesnt work on devantaka mountain, so make sure to stay safe

Nahida: we’ll message you guys around 5:30pm

Wanderer: have the three annoyances met up with you yet?

Heizou: aww are you worried about us kunichan

Wanderer: nvm i hope a rishboland tiger eats you

Kazuha: dont tease him too much

Sethos: we’re making our way to gandharva ville now!

Sethos: we’ll arrive at the same time as you and nahida 

Kazuha: sethos made a wonderful tour guide and i have even composed a song

Sethos: who knew you could use a leaf as an instrument!

Wanderer: focus on making your way to gandharva ville

Wanderer: im not helping you three if you get lost

Heizou: how cruel of you

Tighnari: he’s right tho. im not helping you if you guys get lost either so off the phones

~*~*~*~

~*~*~*~

Dms: Nahida, Wanderer

Fri, 3:50 PM

Nahida: okay, i activated the ruin entrance

Nahida: you may enter the arena

Wanderer: alright

Wanderer: the aeonblight drake woke up

Nahida: i see

Nahida: do you need assistance?

Wanderer: no

Wanderer: take cover

Nahida: alright, just make sure not to damage the perpetual caliber

Fri, 4:22 PM

Wanderer: i got the thing

Wanderer: you can deactivate it now

Nahida: okay, i’ll close up the ruins after you exit

Nahida: lets get back to the others

~*~*~*~

~*~*~*~

sonic boom watch party

Sat, 8:15 AM

Zhongli: venti and i are on our way to liyue harbor

Gorou: shenhe and i are already on our way to jeuyun karst

Gorou: make sure to keep your location on in case anything happens

Shinobu: itto’s phone is kind of garbage but i’ll figure it out dw

Gorou: ty shinobu

Yanfei: we’ll start heading to the chasm

Yelan: aether and i are making our way there now

Yelan: we’ll reach the maw by noon

Yanfei: perfect! we’ll find you there

Shinobu: want me to make a reservation at wangshu inn for you guys? that’s where we’re staying

Aether: yes please! i’ll compensate you

Shinobu: alright

~*~*~*~

~*~*~*~

Dms: Venti, Zhongli

Sat, 11:25 AM

Venti: please tell me you found her teapot

Zhongli: i have not

Zhongli: however i am certain it is in yujing terrace

Venti: why is her domain so hard to find?

Zhongli: most likely to prevent someone from stealing the teapot. mortals cannot use it but the teapot itself is one of high quality

Zhongli: wait

Zhongli: i have found it

Venti: oh thank barbatos

Venti: wait a minute

Zhongli: idiot

Zhongli: just hurry up and get over here

Venti: im omw!!

~*~*~*~

~*~*~*~

sonic boom watch party

Sat, 12:48 PM

Shinobu: im checking in

Shinobu: we have met up with aether, paimon, and yelan

Gorou: ty shinobu

Gorou: shenhe and i have entered jueyun karst

Venti: zhongli and i are having tea with streetward rambler!!

Aether: is that like her gang name or something?

Zhongli: or something

Yanfei: we just heard a strange sound

Yanfei: almost like

Gorou: yanfei??

Venti: where did she go??

Gorou: should we be worried?

Zhongli: i’ll make a call to the millelith

Zhongli: there’s not much we can do if something happens though

Sat, 5:42 PM

Shenhe: we have reached the top of Mt Aocang

Shenhe: have you heard any news

Venti: not yet

Venti: we’re making our way back to wangshu inn rn

Venti: if we hear nothing by tmr we’ll make our way to the chasm ourselves

Gorou: sounds like a plan

Chapter Text

7/11 gang trapped in the backrooms

Sat, ???

Arataki Itto: LET’S PLAY CRAZY 8!

Paimon: are you seriously challenging us to uno bullchucker?

Paimon: we’re trapped here BY OURSELVES with no way to contact anyone else but each other and this is how you want to spend our phone batteries?!?

Arataki Itto: DO YOU HAVE A BETTER WAY TO PASS THE TIME LITTLE LAVENDER MELON

Paimon: …

Paimon: OPPONENT’S MOVE

Aether: luckily i brought a deck of playing cards

Xiao: OPPONENT’S MOVE

Xiao: i know better than to play poker with yelan

Aether: who said anything about poker?

Yelan: :) 

Aether: oh

Aether: oh no

Shinobu: OPPONENT’S MOVE

Aether: dammit shinobu

~*~*~*~

~*~*~*~

psychiatric waiting room

Sat, 6:00 PM

Furina: THE TRIAL OF LYNEY SNEZHEVICH MAY NOW COMMENCE

Lyney: wait please we havent heard back from yanfei

Furina: unfortunate! too bad i dont care!

Lumine: are you saying i cant be a good lawyer for you?

Lyney: i never said that my dear lumine

Lyney: but even you know that you can never compare to yanfei

Heizou: yeah he’s got a point

Faruzan: heizou! you live

Faruzan: i was certain a rishboland tiger wouldve gotten to you

Heizou: why does everyone think im going to get eaten by a tiger?? You guys know i know how to fight, right

Kujou Sara: shut up no one asked

Heizou: i just got here damn

Faruzan: did you like sumeru?? please tell me you guys at least walked by pardhis dhyai

Kazuha: pardhis dhyai was wonderful. very tranquil and inspiring

Beidou: kazuha! spit any flowers lately?

Kazuha: i have indeed composed many poems

Hu Tao: they better not disappoint when you’re up against me for the next poetry battle

Furina: BACK TO THE TRIAL

Furina: lyney is clearly guilty

Lumine: objection!

Lumine: uhh

Lyney: i got this

Lyney: objection lack of evidence

Furina: objection lack of bitches

Lyney: objection lack of father

Furina: objection lack of hairline

Lyney: objection stale ass wig

Furina: OBJECTION

Lumine: guys the trial

Furina: oh right

Furina: LYNEY KILLED COWELL HE WAS THE ONLY ONE IN THE BUILDING

Lumine: well it could not have been lyney because

Lumine: uhh

Lumine: cowell killed cowell

Furina: really?

Lumine: ...yes

Lyney: oh archons im going to jail

Lynery: wriothesley am i gonna survive

Wriothesley: why tf would i know

Lyney: everyone knows you were arrested cmon

Lyney: would i survive the fortress of meropide

Wriothesley: without lynette? no

Wriothesley: you’d piss someone off in a week and be dead before the end of the year

Lyney: aww man

Lynette: typical

Thoma: im almost afraid to ask

Hu Tao: im not

Hu Tao: who’s cowell

Wanderer: and why are we supposed to care

Emilie: oh cowell is the fontaine students joint pet crab

Furina: WHO LYNEY MURDERED

Clorinde: which is why he is now on trial for his crimes

Navia: i say he’s innocent

Wanderer: i care even less now

Heizou: not a surprise!

Heizou: anyways lumine is right

Furina: WHAT

Lyney: SHE IS??

Lumine: I AM???

Lumine: i mean

Lumine: ofc i was right how dare you guys doubt me

Heizou: you guys had an old crab it was simply his time

Hu Tao: THE WANGSHENG FUNERAL PARLOR CAN ARRANGE A FUNERAL IN HONOR OF THE DECEASED COWELL

Childe: or hear me out

Childe: golden crab dish

Furina: how dare you!

Navia: too soon!!

Thoma: time and place childe…

Childe: man

Childe: golden crab would go hard tho

Mona: oh it really would

Kaveh: wait wriothesley got arrested?

Wanderer: for murder

Kaveh: WAIT REALLY

Heizou: yeah it was all over the news a few years back

Kaveh: oh damn that’s crazy

Kaveh: anyways has anyone heard back from our friends hiking through liyue

Thoma: you know i thought you would freak out more

Kaveh: i would before i met hat guy. he has me desensitized to crime now

Wanderer: it builds character

Sethos: so true!!

Kazuha: it did for me

Heizou: why do i hang out with delinquents…

Jean: i have not heard from them actually

Kokomi: me neither. gorou usually tells me everything

Yoimiya: they probably just got caught up in the experience

Kirara: or they ran into multiple areas with bad signal

Kirara: happens to me all the time on the job

Jean: true. we can worry if we still hear nothing from them tomorrow

~*~*~*~

~*~*~*~

7/11 gang trapped in the backrooms

Sat, ???

Shinobu: yeah lets just text for rn

Shinobu: i dont think the walls are gonna start crumbling again but better safe than sorry

Yanfei: shouldnt we try to conserve battery?

Shinobu: we all gave our phones to nahida before the trip right? she upgraded our battery life. it should last us two weeks if we only use its basic functions

Aether: i guess we can agree that nobody won the poker game then!

Yelan: nice try. i know i won

Yelan: pay up white boy

Aether: aw man

Paimon: can we do some sort of game? Paimon is getting bored

Aether: uhh we can play something like 20 questions or never have i ever

Aether: we gotta keep it pg for paimon tho

Shinobu: im down

Yelan: i’ll go first since i won at poker

Yelan: never have i ever had romantic or sexual feelings for a man

Aether: THATS NOT FAIR

Aether: AND I SAID KEEP IT PG

Yelan: fine

Yelan: never have i ever had romantic feelings for a man gayboy

Aether: >:(

Aether: well obviously i have

Yanfei: dont forget to put down a finger!

Paimon: WE CANT EVEN SEE EACH OTHER

Shinobu: just say the number of fingers you have left if you put one down then

Aether: okay 9

Xiao: 9

Arataki Itto: 9

Xiao: never have i ever been in a car chase

Paimon: xiao you have to try to choose something someone has done…

Yelan: you little shit

Yelan: im a little impressed

Yelan: 9

Paimon: YOU WHAT

Aether: you what??

Yelan: :)

Yanfei: never have i ever shoplifted

Yelan: 8

Xiao: 8

Aether: 8

Paimon: 9

Shinobu: never have i ever gotten food poisoning

Arataki Itto: 8

Paimon: 8

Xiao: 7

Arataki Itto: NEVER HAVE I EVER PLAYED POKER AGAINST YELAN

Aether: HEY

Aether: 7

Yanfei: 9

Paimon: never has paimon ever…

Paimon: stayed up all night

Yanfei: 8

Aether: 6

Shinobu: 9

Aether: never have i ever had older siblings

Xiao: 6

Yanfei: 7

Yelan: no you dont?

Yanfei: i will soon

Yanfei: you guys now how streetward rambler basically adopted me

Aether: yeah

Paimon: why do you guys call her that

Yanfei: her name is ping but granny’s name is also ping and everyone calls granny madam ping

Yanfei: so she goes by streetward rambler

Paimon: that’s so long tho

Xiao: you get used to it

Yanfei: anyways streetward rambler is planning on proposing to guizhong!

Yanfei: that’s why she called zhongli and venti over

Yanfei: which means me and zhongli will be step sisters

Yanfei: though i have considered her my family since we met

Yanfei: same with xiao

Xiao: oh

Xiao: this one returns the sentiment

Paimon: awwww this is so sweet!!

Yelan: never have i ever broken into a church

Aether: 5

Paimon: 7

Shinobu: what is wrong with you guys

Aether: a moment of weakness

Xiao: never have i ever trespassed

Yelan: 7

Yanfei: 6

Aether: 4

Paimon: 4

Arataki Itto: 7

Shinobu: 8

Paimon: SHINOBU AND YANFEI??

Paimon: everyone else i knew that but YOU GUYS??

Yanfei: …a moment of weakness

Yanfei: never have i ever snuck out

Yelan: 6

Shinobu: 7

Arataki Itto: 6

Aether: 3

Xiao: 5

Shinobu: never have i ever failed a class or was at risk of failing a class

Yelan: 5

Paimon: 3

Arataki Itto: 5

Arataki Itto: NEVER HAVE I EVER GOTTEN AN ACTUAL DEATH THREAT FROM SOMEONE

Arataki Itto: BECAUSE ARATAKI NUMERO UNO ITTO IS FRIENDS WITH EVERYONE

Shinobu: someone tried to kill you before

Arataki Itto: THEY DID NOT THREATEN ME SO IT DOESNT COUNT. I, ARATAKI ITTO, DID NOT SAY I NEVER HAD A LIFE THREATENING SITUATION. BC I HAVE, FOR I LIVE ON THE EDGE

Xiao: 4

Yelan: 4

Aether: 2

Yanfei: 6

Paimon: never has paimon ever liked someone in this room

Paimon: like a crush

Aether: 1

Shinobu: 6

Yanfei: 5

Yelan: good question paimon

Aether: never have i ever been called a flying lavender melon or emergency food

Paimon: HEY PAIMON IS NOT EMERGENCY FOOD

Paimon: 2

Yelan: never have i ever had a twin

Aether: WOW

Aether: 0

Shinobu: do we go until last one standing?

Yanfei: i guess we can

Xiao: never have i ever gotten my ass kicked by cyno through genius invocation tcg

Yanfei: 4

Yanfei: well thats not fair, you dont even play the game

Xiao: tough luck

Aether: …- 1 lol

Arataki Itto: 4

Shinobu: 5

Yelan: i dont tend to play games i know for a fact i cannot win

Paimon: fair enough

Paimon: 2

Yanfei: never have i ever worked out with iansan or varesa

Shinobu: 4

Arataki Itto: 3

Xiao: 3

Shinobu: never have i ever kissed ningguang

Yelan: fuck you

Yelan: 3

Arataki Itto: NEVER HAVE I EVER MET MY BIOLOGICAL PARENTS

Shinobu: 3 

Yanfei: 3

Yelan: 2

Paimon: 1

Paimon: NEVER HAS PAIMON EVER HAD A CRUSH ON MS HINA

Arataki Itto: HEY

Arataki Itto: 2

Paimon: THATS WHAT YOU GET FOR PULLING THE ORPHAN CARD

Arataki Itto: ARATAKI ITTO CAN PULL WHATEVER CARD HE WANTS TO PULL

Yelan: never had i ever had my allergies used against me

Arataki Itto: 1

Xiao: never have i ever participated in a singing competition

Paimon: 0

Arataki Itto: 0

Paimon: XIAO YOURE SO MEAN

Paimon: IM GOING TO COME UP WITH AN UGLY NICKNAME FOR YOU

Yanfei: never have i ever fallen in love with someone because of their music

Xiao: 2

Xiao: i will remember this

Shinobu: never have i ever had to investigate a crime

Yelan: 1

Yanfei: 2

Yelan: never have i ever had to bail someone out of jail

Yanfei: 1

Shinobu: 2

Xiao: never have i ever been in a lesbian situationship

Yelan: 0

Yanfei: 0

Aether: you’re crazy for that

Xiao: i was aiming for yanfei, yelan was unintentional collateral

Yelan: i will remember this

Shinobu: since we both have two, wanna just do a tie?

Xiao: alright

Paimon: booo

Arataki Itto: BOOO

Aether: how about 21 questions?

Yanfei: or we can just talk like normal people

Yelan: thats not fun

Yanfei: you just want blackmail

Yelan: archons forbid a woman has hobbies

Sat, ???

Aether: okay questions for xiao

Aether: are you interested in anyone

Xiao: do i have to answer

Aether: yeah

Paimon: yup!

Arataki Itto: NOT IF YOU DONT WANT TO

Shinobu: not if it makes you uncomfortable

Yanfei: yes

Yelan: yeah you’re outvoted

Xiao: thank you itto and shinobu only

Xiao: i dont have to answer

Aether: okay i see how it is

Aether: paimon i choose you!

Paimon: PLEASE

Paimon: PLEASE

Paimon: PLEASE

Paimon: PLEASE

Paimon: PLEASE

Paimon: PLEASE

Paimon: PLEASE

Paimon: PLEASE

Paimon: PLEASE

Paimon: PLEASE

Paimon: PLEASE

Paimon: PLEASE

Paimon: PLEASE

Xiao: FINE

Xiao: YES I AM INTERESTED IN SOMEONE AND I HAVE BEEN FOR YEARS HAPPY

Paimon: dont you feel closer to us now that you’ve shared these feelings?

Xiao: no

Sat, ???

Aether: okay guys its vulnerability hours

Aether: i had a crush on xiao until like…an hour ago maybe

Shinobu: oh

Arataki Itto: YIKES

Yanfei: …do you want compensation

Xiao: sorry aether

Xiao: TF YOU MEAN BY COMPENSATION

Aether: LMAOOO GUYS 

Aether: it’s okay it wasnt that deep it was just a silly little crush

Aether: like my crush on albedo

Xiao: oh yeah i remember that

Aether: that was so embarrassing i fully thought he was about to ask me out

Yanfei: what happened

Aether: he asked to do experiments together but he meant like actual science, not a smooth flirty pick up line

Aether: lumine laughed at me for two hours

Aether: yelan stop laughing

Arataki Itto: MY TURN

Arataki Itto: I WAS TALKING TO GOROU ON THE HIKE RIGHT

Arataki Itto: AND WE WERE TALKING AND I THINK I MAY BE ACE TOO

Shinobu: welcome to the club

Xiao: we got another one

Aether: i thought you liked gorou?

Paimon: didnt bullchucker like ms hina?

Arataki Itto: I LIKE GOROU BUT ITS NO LONGER ROMANTIC. HE IS NOT INTERESTED IN DATING. HE’S STILL AWESOME AND I STILL ADMIRE HIM

Arataki Itto: I THINK I LIKE TWO OTHER PEOPLE NOW? IT’S VERY CONFUSING GOROU DIDNT KNOW HOW TO HELP ME BUT HE SAID WE COULD TALK LATER ONCE WE GET TO CAMPUS

Paimon: dont you mean if?

Arataki Itto: THERE IS NO IF. ONLY WHEN. ARATAKI ITTO WILL MANIFEST IT

Arataki Itto: ARATAKI ITTO DOES NOT GIVE UP SO EASILY

Yanfei: that’s the spirit!! We’ll find a way to get out of here

Aether: can you tell me who they are

Shinobu: no

Arataki Itto: I AM NOT FALLING FOR THAT

Aether: darn

Paimon: you and your bets…

Yelan: finish the story

Arataki Itto: OH RIGHT. I LIKE THEM AND WANT TO GO ON DATES AND DO BEETLE FIGHTS WITH THEM BUT I DO NOT WANT TO DO ANYTHING MORE THAN THAT

Arataki Itto: GOROU SAID THAT THERE IS NOTHING WRONG WITH NOT FEELING ATTRACTED TO ANYONE IN THAT WAY BC THAT IS OUR NORMAL

Arataki Itto: IT FELT LIKE I WAS GETTING ADVICE FROM MS HINA. CRAZY RIGHT

Shinobu: totally

Aether: fr

Paimon: just a silly little coincidence

Sat, ???

Xiao: i miss my wife guys

Xiao: i miss him a lot

Yelan: for fucks sake

Paimon: WE GET IT

Aether: tell me who it is PLEASE im dying of curiosity

Xiao: no you and lumine have a bet on it

Aether: …no what we would never do that

Xiao: sure…

Xiao: anyways as i was saying

Paimon: MAKE HIM STOP

Sat, ???

Yanfei: is everyone okay?

Yanfei: im with yelan

Aether: im with xiao

Aether: has anyone seen paimon

Shinobu: she’s with me and itto

Aether: thank goodness

Aether: im never going into the chasm again

Yelan: right

Yelan: next time you can just get lost. im no longer taking jobs from your cousin

Aether: understandable

Aether: not only am i now broke, but i landed on my ass and my tailbone hurts

Yelan: try getting good at poker

Aether: okay asswipe

Yanfei: the chasm is surprisingly unstable

Yanfei: this is the second time we fell through it

Xiao: the deeper we go the more dangerous it will be. we should try to reconvene

Shinobu: luckily we can still track each other’s location. it is surprisingly precise

Arataki Itto: WHAT WOULD WE DO WITHOUT NAHIDA

Shinobu: nobody move. we will try to reach you guys

Sat, ???

Paimon: LET’S PLAY CRAZY 8!

Yelan: OPPONENT’S MOVE

Aether: OPPONENT’S MOVE

Yanfei: OPPONENT’S MOVE

Paimon: OPPONENT’S MOVE

Paimon: do you think itto will wake up soon?

Yelan: OPPONENT’S MOVE

Aether: OPPONENT’S MOVE

Aether: he’s just needs to rest a bit, he did break through AN ENTIRE WALL

Aether: how did he even do that

Yanfei: OPPONENT’S MOVE

Yanfei: i mean he’s always been strong. it’s not too out there

Paimon: OPPONENT’S MOVE

Paimon: not even paimon believes that!

Yelan: OPPONENT’S MOVE

Yelan: just keep quiet and focus on the game. youre losing

Paimon: HEY

Aether: OPPONENT’S MOVE

Aether: do you think xiao will be okay?

Yanfei: OPPONENT’S MOVE

Yanfei: he’ll be fine. he just needs to sleep it off

Paimon: OPPONENT’S MOVE

Paimon: are you sure? you and xiao got really hurt during the fall too

Yelan: OPPONENT’S MOVE

Aether: OPPONENT’S MOVE

Yanfei: OPPONENT’S MOVE

Yanfei: like i said, we’ll be fine. don’t worry about it too much

Paimon: OPPONENT’S MOVE

Yelan: OPPONENT’S MOVE

Yelan: stop trying to talk out loud. do you want to wake them up?

Aether: OPPONENT’S MOVE

Aether: why won’t you tell us what’s happening

Yanfei: OPPONENT’S MOVE

Paimon: OPPONENT’S MOVE

Yelan: OPPONENT’S MOVE

Yelan: YOU WIN!

Yelan: you and paimon are incapable of keeping a secret for very long. especially paimon

Paimone: HEY

Aether: so something is going on!

Paimon: NOTHING MAKES SENSE HERE

Paimon: THE CLOCKS IN OUR PHONES DONT WORK BUT WE’VE BEEN HERE FOR SO LONG IT CANNOT POSSIBLY STILL BE SATURDAY

Paimon: YANFEI, XIAO, AND ITTO ALL GOT REALLY HURT BUT THE REST OF US ARE FINE

Aether: we would always end up in the same place no matter where we went until itto broke down the wall

Aether: and none of us have felt hungry or thirsty. just tired

Yelan: it’s none of your business really

Paimon: WE’RE STUCK HERE TOO SO IT US OUR BUSINESS

Yanfei: please just drop it

Chapter Text

sonic boom watch party

Sun, 8:00 AM

Venti: xiao’s siblings contacted me earlier

Venti: they’re on their way

Zhongli: they could most likely sense the shift in the chasm’s leylines

Gorou: im in position!

Gorou: i have a good vantage point overlooking the maw

Shenhe: i’m in position

Zhongli: make sure to stay within gorou’s sight

Shenhe: yes ma’am

Zhongli: venti?

Venti: i finished drawing the circle

Venti: getting into position

Shenhe: are you going to play your flute?

Venti: yes! im using my magic to power up zhongli’s magic

Venti: hopefully xiao and yelan are able to meet her halfway

Gorou: you never explained what exactly we should expect

Zhongli: our friends have fallen into a domain within the chasm this has agitated the leylines and the karma it has stored, which are now attempting to trap them there

Zhongli: i’m attempting to create a passage using my magic so that they may exit the domain and the chasm, but doing so will release that karma in a tangible form

Shenhe: i am an exorcist, so i can deal with the karma. but i may be overwhelmed

Gorou: i understand. i’ll look out for you too

Shenhe: appreciated

Venti: and i am defending zhongli

Shenhe: while playing music?

Venti: don’t tell me you lack faith in me

Shenhe: i do not

Venti: awww youre so sweet

Shenhe: i am?

Zhongli: gorou, focus on leading our friends out of here the moment you see them

Gorou: yes ma’am!

Zhongli: venti, do you know when the other yakshas will be arriving?

Venti: soon! eta is maybe 5 minutes

Venti: they have our locations dw

Zhongli: alright. i will now begin the ritual

~*~*~*~

~*~*~*~

psychiatric waiting room

Sun, 10:51 AM

Aether: WE LIVED

Lumine: darn…

Kaveh: what happened??

Yanfei: the chasm collapsed with us un it

Jean: are you guys okay???

Aether: yeah. the authorities were super confused tho

Lumine: authorities??

Aether: IDK HOW TO SPELL THE LIYUE POLICE OKAY

Gorou: we’re on our way back to wangshu inn

Aether: XIAO HAS SIBLINGS

Lumine: he does??

Lumine: damn we both lost the bet to paimon

Xiao: STOP MAKING BETS ON MY PERSONAL LIFE

Aether: TELL ME WHO YOURE IN LOVE WITH SO I CAN WIN THE BET

Xiao: @Wanderer

Wanderer: tf do you want

Wanderer: oh

Wanderer: kys aether

Aether: YOU

Nahida: hat guy we talked about this :(

Jean: scara we talked about this

Wanderer: did you really think i would listen

Nahida: there is nothing wrong with hope

Jean: no not really but i can try

Sun, 7:00 PM

Zhongli: if anyone needs me, do not

Zhongli: i may get violent

Yelan: fr. im skipping class tmr i earned it

Zhongli: @Gorou @Shenhe can one of you beat up childe for me

Shenhe: dibs

Shenhe: i do not require an explanation. i will find him

Shenhe: gorou come join me

Gorou: alright

Gorou: an explanation would be nice tho

Zhongli: we spar once a week, usually on sundays, but i may actually murder him if he tries to convince me to leave my bed

Yelan: he would love that

Zhongli: which is why im sending shenhe and gorou in my stead

Gorou: i wont let you down!!

Shenhe: i’ll kill him in your name

Mon, 4:49 PM

Venti: guess who’s going to the hospital!!

Xiao: are you okay

Venti: i got pushed off the roof!!

Xiao: WHAT

Aether: lol no but fr what happened

Venti: :)

Jean: are you okay???

Furina: are any bones broken??

Zhongli: names

Zhongli: give us names

Venti: well to be more accurate i was kicked off of the roof

Venti: yes hu tao you’ll be planning my funeral you can stop typing now

Hu Tao: you know me so well

Venti: i broke my leg, sprained my wrist, and broke a rib

Venti: and i cannot disclose who did it (the fair lady)

Furina: who?

Zhongli: they will be dealt with

Raiden: oh look i see her in the parking lot rn

Zhongli: it would be a shame if someone were not to see her while backing out of the parking lot

Raiden: no it wouldnt. I’m hitting her

Xiao: hit her hard

Yanfei: at least delete your messages for plausible deniability

Raiden: i am no coward

Wanderer: xiao and i are on our way to the hospital

Wanderer: venti

Venti: yeah

Wanderer: we’re at the store tf do you want

Xiao: i already got you some of the apple tarts you like a lot

Venti: im going to cry

Wanderer: good

Tue, 2:07 AM

Venti: I can go home tmr!!

Venti: it will take me like at least 3 months to recover from everything tho

Venti: curse my fragile bones

Jean: im just happy youre safe 

Venti: yeah i got lucky. It was a two story building and i landed on grass and not the concrete

Venti: did raiden actually hit signora with her car

Jean: yes

Jean: she’s meeting with the disciplinary committee

Raiden: and i’ll do it again

Raiden: i despised her ass anyway

Jean: get off your phone

Lumine: venti are you heading home like to mond?

Venti: yeah for the rest of the week

Venti: the school let me leave bc i was assaulted and andrius and venessa threatened the university

Venti: kuni wanna do me a favor

Wanderer: fuck no xiao is already packing your stuff away for you

Venti: i cant tell if im gonna cry bc im still high on painkillers or bc xiao is so sweet

Lumine: it can be both!!

Wed, 1:18 PM

Venti: i have been released!!

Furina: freedom!!!

Hu Tao: freedom!!!

Venti: to wolvendom i go!!

Zhongli: is xiao taking you?

Venti: yeah!! he’s so sweet

Venti: this will be his first time meeting my family

Zhongli: they’ll like him

Zhongli: they like wanderer so the standards are low

Wanderer: die

Wanderer: anyways im crashing you date venti sorry not sorry

Venti: youre always welcome to visit durin whenever you want

Wanderer: fuck off

~*~*~*~

~*~*~*~

Gaming has added 10+ students to unnamed groupchat

Gaming has renamed the groupchat to Benny’s adventure team, assemble!!!

Benny’s adventure team, assemble!!!

Wed, 5:18 PM

Gaming: i cannot believe i have not befriended collei bennett or razor before this group project they are so cool

Gaming: anyways it is large gc time!

Gaming: hello friends!

Lan Yan: hello!! I’m looking forward to meeting you all. especially bennett. i have heard many interesting things about you. But they cant all be true, right?

Barbara: no theyre probably true

Xinyan: BARBARA

Barbara: XINYAN

Xinyan: !!!

Barbara: !!!

Sayu: now what is this

Charlotte: ouu a gc!! I know some of you guys!!

Charlotte: hi freminet!!

Freminet: …hi

Charlotte: :)

Charlotte: is bennett online?

Gaming: nope his phone died after we left

Xinyan: oh right, you guys met up for the project today right?

Gaming: yeah we went to razor’s house

Collei: he lives in wolvendom! like right outside of the forest

Collei: gaming met venti for the first time too. and hat guy

Sayu: who?

Xinyan: OH IK VENTI

Xinyan: i love his music like actually he is so talented

Razor: venti is my brother

Razor: andrius adopted both of us

Sayu: orphan gang

Razor: yes

Gaming: Xiao was also there!!

Razor: venti’s boyfriend

Chongyun: fr???

Razor: almost

Razor: they smell gay

Xingqiu: LMAOO???

Razor: did i do it right

Xingqiu: its not exactly wrong. people sometimes say fruity to mean gay

Razor: oh okay

Chongyun: what are you teaching razor

Xingqiu: dw about it love

Razor: you smell fruity

Xingqiu: good job razor

Xinyan: i know what you are

Wed, 8:39 PM

Gaming: i am now obsessed with cookie run kingdom

Gaming: they have a wedding update and its so cute

Gaming: there’s lesbians

Charlotte: lesbians??

Lan Yan: FOR REAL???

Xinyan: say less

Collei: the game is downloading as we speak

Gaming: wait i dont wanna spread misinformation

Xingqiu: thats my favorite hobby tho

Chongyun: we know

Xiangling: we know

Gaming: the featured cookies of the update are not actually marrying each other

Gaming: i think they act pretty gay tho so in my heart they are married

Sayu: wedding cake cookie and black forest cookie are married trust

Gaming: you play the game too???

Sayu: wouldnt you like to know weather boy

Gaming: I SAID I WAS SORRY FOR CALLING YOU SHORT

Sayu: you will pay with blood

Collei: oh dear

Chapter Text

Venti has added 10+ students to the groupchat

Venti has renamed the groupchat to Fatherless Behavior

Fatherless Behavior

Wed, 7:11 PM

Venti: I’m being responsible for once are you guys proud of me 🥰🥰

Zhongli: no

Venti: girl, there is no pleasing you

Furina: dont forget to add my mother guys

Venti: oh right

Neuvillette has been added to the groupchat Fatherless Behavior

Neuvillette: I resent the implications of that statement and the name of this group chat.

Neuvillette: Furina you know I am not your mother.

Neuvillette: You have a mother. It is not me.

Furina: 🥰🥰

Venti: it was either this or psych ward waiting room

Furina: we agreed a name like that fit the larger gc better

Nahida: Hi Neuvillette!!

Neuvillette: Hello Nahida.

Raiden: Is this name not accurate? I have two mothers. Zhongli and Venti are estranged from their biological parents. You, Furina, and Nahida were raised by single mothers. We are fatherless, and we behave as such, do we not?

Furina: WHEN DID WE TELL U THAT

Venti: anyways back to business

Venti: raiden the disciplinary committee gave u a warning lmao

Raiden: and i’ll do it again

Furina: DID SHE ACTUALLY HIT SOMEONE WITH HER CAR

Zhongli: oh she did not stop there

Zhongli: after hitting her with her car she got out and beat her up

Nahida: she broke rosalyn’s nose and wrist

Furina: SHE WHAT

Furina: wait whos that

Zhongli: La Signora of the Fatui

Nahida: she also goes by The Fair Lady, but her real name is rosalyn kruzchka lohefalter

Furina: OH I KNOW HER FROM MY DRAMA CLASS

Furina: LMAOOO

Neuvillette: Furina…

Furina: i mean uh

Furina: oh nooooo what a tragedy (LMAO)

Zhongli: you shouldve broken her leg

Furina: right!!!

Raiden: i was trying to do that but was stopped 

Furina: bummer

Nahida: no breaking legs!! we will move on for now! we were given a list of cultural festivals and events to prepare for. luckily I still have it! do you want me to send the file here?

Jean: yes please

Jean: venti why would you name the gc this??

Venti: u no like?

Jean: me no like

Venti: damn

Venti: anyways

Nahida: [ eventlist.pdf ]

Jean: The first event of the year is Weinlesefest. I can take care of that

Venti: we*

Kaeya: we*

Eula: we*

Ningguang: Right after that is Moonchase.

Nahida: There has been talk of a halloween event and a winter concert at the end of december. As well as plans already underway for the Sabzeruz festival.

Nahida: And we can’t forget about the sports festival. the dendro dorms are dreading it

Raiden: dendro has no chance of survival

Zhongli: Raiden…

Raiden: electro dorms will remove all obstacles on our path to victory

Furina: haunted house! Haunted house!!!

Venti: guys i think furina is looking forward to the haunted house

Venti: just a hunch tho

Furina: man…

Ganyu: I'm very much looking forward to the Sabzeruz festival this year!

Ayaka: is Nilou performing

Nahida: That’s the plan!!

Ayaka: I can’t wait!!

Ayaka: Moving on, the fontinalia festival and the mikawa flower festival are both in the winter months

Furina: we’re thinking of adding a film competition to the fontinalia festival!!

Kokomi: oh? the mikawa flower festival?

Ayato: a recent addition

Ayato: this year the festival falls after lantern right, if I’m not mistaken

Ganyu: you are correct

Nahida: and windblume, irodori, and the wisdom gala all fall in spring

Ganyu: this seems like a lot but if we divide it by national student governments it is much more manageable

Furina: im so excited!! The early plans for all of these events are looking great!!

Venti: so many future concerts and performances!! I’m already practicing the piece im playing for Weinlesefest

Zhongli: We will still need to be ready to make changes. There is talk of partnering with the highschool for a few events

Kaeya: I heard that as well. They might bring back windtrace

Amber: LETS GOO

Eula: Good! Vengeance shall be mine!

Venti: fr!! 

Furina: not the mondstadtians going crazy