Archive of Our Own ^beta

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Part 1. My Everything

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Part 2. What were we

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Part 3. What we've done

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Part 4. The last night

So short. I know :(

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Part 5. Separation

JK felt helpless being unable to protect his loved one from the cruel world. After he was called up for military service, he joined the Army. JK wanted to become emotionally stronger, strengthen his spirit in training and discipline. Their break up... was inevitable.

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Part 6. The struggle

The episode is not about political, rather social problem of homophobia, not only in military, but in society of any country in general. Tae had to marry, JK had to lie about having a girlfriend, cause his coming out will not let him serve and rise through the ranks. Sad reality.

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Part 7. Life goes on

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Part 8. Without you

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Part 9. Stigma

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Part 10. Battle buddies

*Live-fire drill - a military exercise that simulates battles to test military concepts and weapons. Friendly fire - an accidental attack of one's own military forces or those of an ally. Hands in pockets - in military is considered unprofessional so there's a rule forbidding it.

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Part 11. To be with you

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Part 12. I've found you

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Part 13. What happened to us

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Part 14. Discipline

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Part 15. I remember

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Part 16. Next-door neighbors

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Part 17. It's been a long time

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Part 18. It's you

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Part 19. Protector

The part is short, ikr ><

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Part 20. Like a man

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Part 21. Sacrifice

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Part 22. Whiskey Tango Foxtrot

*Whiskey Tango Foxtrot in military slang stands for WTF

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Part 23. Flower boy

To be continued...

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Part 24. Love hurts

To be continued...

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Part 25. The kiss of life

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Part 26. In the office

THAT EVENING

*belay in military means 'stop'

To be continued...

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Part 27. I'm fine

To be continued...

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Part 28. Have mercy

To be continued...

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Part 29. Against the wall

*should be Jjimjilbang (mistyped 1 J in the beginning) - is a Korean public bathhouse with various saunas, pools, showers, and a relaxation. In this part I add the Japanese style onsen, in korean oncheon a hot spring with bathing facilities that surround it (that is jjimjilbang, unlike onsen, it has nothing to do with volcanoes and nature).

To be continued...

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Part 30. Out of my league 

*The idiom means that someone is considered too good, too attractive and too successful, and desirable to someone to realistically be with, meaning that they are on a higher level that is unreachable. That was Taehyung for Jungkook.

[flashback]

*gunghap - in saju - korean traditional fortune telling means compatibility of a couple for marriage. Remember part 21? But he didn't marry him...

To be continued...

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Part 31. Kiss me, kill me

*named this part like this cause Kookie is emotionally torturing Tae...

*I remember by buddy recently told me "good fuck" instead of good luck, typo is happen in the most funny way lmao

To be continued...

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Part 32. Don't Ask Don't Tell

"Don't Ask Don't Tell" or DADT a military policy in USA since 1994 that prevented openly gay people from military service claiming it was to "prohibit discrimination against them", while it was itself a discrimination because every openly lesbian, gay and bisexual would be discharged if known to be not heterosexual. The policy was ended in 2011 so in USA openly gay people can serve since then. A similar but ever harsher law still exists in South Korea where homosexuality in military is even criminalized.

*that's ice to put on aching head, helps migraines too btw

*the flower Dr. Kim looks at is called hibiscus, in Korean "mugunghwa" (omo the Squid game Reference!) actually is considered the national flower of the country and it's kind of floral symbol.

To be continued...

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Part 33. His order

To be continued...

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Part 34. Need Help?

like father, like son ^^

To be continued...

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Part 35. Truth or Dare

To be continued...

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Part 36. Fight for you

*I forgot the watches... maybe Captain dropped somewhere duh or just took them off lol

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Part 37. Lost in Paradise

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Part 38. We're Lost in Paradise

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Part 39. Cheat on him

*Jisoo inspired character ^^

...

This

.

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Part 40. Invisible scars

*smoking is bad for health!

To be continued...

The Hero of Special Forces 

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Part 41. Punish me

*Smoking is not healthy :)

To be continued...

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Part 42. Discharge for loving one

To be continued...

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Part 43. The war is over

To be continued...

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Part 44. Make Peace

To be continued...

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Part 45. Make Love

Taeyung's question could be one of so many, about leaving military service and living together, about marriage, family, and happy ever after... overwhelmed, he didn't know where to start, how to say it right. 

And what Jungkook's answer meant: for him, he would.

To be continued...

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Tear me apart with your touch

Kiss me till I suffocate

Kill me with love, tenderly, slowly

And when I die by your hands

Bury me in your embrace

So I will rest within you

For eternity.

To be continued...

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Part 47. Prologue & Don't cry, baby

Why at the end of the part 46 Taehyung was crying? I hope the answer is clear. Every page is full of symbolism and allegories. I'll do my best to explain the main points of the illustrations.

This moment echoes with part 9. Stigma where Taehyung is bullied by classmates on halloween party for dressing up as a Sailor Moon. Btw *text without blur is on my twt/x, tw/trigger warning there's a lot of bullying. Taehyung's peers were cyberbullying him behind his back, afraid of facing legal issues, they were behind anonymous accounts, calling him a failure, a narcissistic psycho, toxic, a jerk, dumb, a weirdo, a bastard, a virgin loser, worthless, trash, and even "burn in hell' because he's gay. They mocked him for being a 'nepo baby' - saying he was born into wealth and hadn't earned anything himself. But the most horrifying part was that they told him to end his own life. I want to speak about this issue. In Korea, the suicide rate - especially among young people - is one of the highest in the world. Protecting our mental health and supporting each other is more important than ever.

Kookie the art student doesn't know what his hagwon classmate is dealing with - Kim Taehyung the popular student, a social butterfly, who seemed always smiling, outgoing, talkative, was suddenly, sitting in the corner of the school roof... looking so sad. Why? Kookie couldn't ask, he was shy, but he found strenght to approach Taehyung. He didn't have umbrella with him either, so he couldn't help Tae, not physically not mentally, as they didn't know each other well, but all he could offer is to be there for him like "whatever you're going through, I'm here". Just to stay by his side, hoping this would make him feel better. And the truth is so often it's the only thing we need, the comforting presence of a compassionate soul.

*hagwon - are private, for-profit institutions that offer after-school classes, that specialize in subjects like English, math, or Taekwondo, art etc. so they didn't study in same school as they had different age, but visited same hagwon to study various subjects and that's how they met and became close friends.

Yeah... he beat up the bullies, they were first to start, hit him, insult him... and Kookie attacked back. They knew Jungkook was friends with Kim Taehyung, so yeah, they thought by hurting him they could harm Tae, but Kookie showed him he'll stand up for himself and people who are dear to him.

*school violence penalty - in Korean schools it is forbidden to even self defence, people who hit back will be charged with violation and will be punished. However here Tae was promising to make sure Kook will not face it, because Tae will do his best to persuade school officials through his powerful family name, the Kim family. 

Harsh education system in South Korea is one of the reasons why a lot of young people are depressed and end their life due to failing the high expectations from family and society. If it wasn't for Kookie who supported Tae through his rough years of studying in college and university, Taehyung would have probably lost his will to keep going. 

*Yaja " - is a shortened form of "yaganjayulhakseup" (야간자율학습), which translates to "night self-study". It refers to a self-study program held at school, often after regular classes, where students can choose to participate in extra study time. In short, it means studying above, more, harder. Tae has to do this, to meet his parents expectations and he knows he will be late, so Kook won't have to wait for him. But Koo will not give up...

Tae studied so hard he forgot to eat and was too tired to go to a cafe or order anything, Kookie knew that and he took care of him. Caring is the essential part love. A gesture like this is truly powerful.

*"5 Michelin stars" is a meme, comical exaggeration, there are only 3 michelin stars, but yeah Kookie is trying to impress his crush with these kimbaps and grilled pork or salmon uwu

The newspapers symbolize not just media opinion but the entire society's judgement, it's people that surround us, work with us, they're the authorities, they're the common citizens, friends, family... and they have an opinion, yes, it's just an opinion, but this opinion, if in large, can influence the lives of other people, and change it, very often for the worst.

Taehyung and Jungkook grew up together, through all the hardships. "they believed I was strong " means people always expect a person, specially in the position of power to be strong because vulnerability is shamed as a weakness. This belief often deludes people into thinking they have a right to speak ill of others, and judge their life. Taehyung could not show his pain, he hid it deep inside under his smile, but Jungkook could see it through him.

The lore is the bullies grew up and they still hate Taehyung, outside they smile and bow and pretend they're nice, but deep down the want to destroy him. They're medical students, also from rich families, just less rich that Tae's, so their envy and jealousy consumes them alive. Instead of focusing on studying and their own future, they drink, party, do drugs and gamble. Jungkook hated them from the beginning. However they always found a way to mislead Tae by their deceptive words and appearances. 

Too bad for them, they made a mistake. The main fuckboy started touching Tae’s hair, and Jungkook walked in, frantic, searching for Tae, he saw, he was furious. He attacked them like a lion, fast and ruthless, breaking them down, spilling blood, forcing them to back off. Police came, ambulance...

*Itaewon club "Code Red".  In military context Code Red means a serious security warning, a threat, indicating an emergency or a dangerous situation that has significantly worsened. I gave this name on purpose 

"Drinking with someone" in Korean as well as Japanese culture isn't just about having fun, like it often is in the West - it's also a way to build relationships, discuss business, or show social obligation. For example, employees are often expected to drink with their boss or colleagues as part of professional etiquette. So Tae went to discuss "pharma business" with his university colleagues who, perhaps wanted to launch a pharmaceutical startup, or maybe looking for funding, connections, or advice. Sadly he didn't know he was being lured into soimething much darker. His drink was spiked, yeah, with a drug, and if Jungkook didn't come in time, something horrible could have happened... Jungkook feared this so much, he knew he will never forgive himself if he won't be there to protect his lover. 

No matter how much it hurt, he forgave him. Love means to forgive and to be forgiven.

By universe, they were destined to be together, to be a part of each other, forever.

There was no one.  No one.  In this world so heartless, vain, and lonely... How could I know love? I walked alone... until you came into my life. So stubbornly, recklessly, and risking it all, you fought for me. You fought for my time... stealing me, carrying me away from it all, just for us to be together. You never cared what anyone thought or said. When they all believed I was strong, you saw my pain. You guarded me from every evil, that could've ruined me. You rescued me, you saved me... You defended me like I was your homeland. Even when I was a total wreck — still, you stayed. You were there for me. You were always. The only one. [My Only One] How could I let you go?

Author's note:

This prologue was actually a beginning of part 40. "Invisible scars" but I cut it out because it'll be too long, however since I promised I won't cut out anything, I'm happy I made this part. I'll keep my promise with other moments excluded in future parts (yes, scenario is written and I cannot change it). Which page/moment is your favorite? For me it's the two hands intertwining, because it's Tae realizing that Jungkook was always there for him, even these 4 years apart, even when physically they were separated... the red thread of fate connecting them, because they are destined to be with each other.

This part is about the meaning of true love - to be there, to care, to protect, to forgive, to love and to be loved. To be continued of course,  and the delay was due to first month I was drawing whole part but then decided to make a prologue to it, so yeah, took me another month for it. I will resume what I started. Spoilers? Part 47 itself (not Prologue!) will be emotional, sexy, cute perhaps? Flashback end, maybe they'll try to talk... or fuck lol anyways I'll update snippets/spoilers on my IG stories~ tysm for reading ^^ HL <3

Part 47. Don't cry, baby

update: 26/07/2025

Author's note

The last caption is Jeon's thoughts, he didn't say it out loud. This scene with Tae crying when he and Kook started making love - is actually the oldest scene in the plot, like it was included in My Only One back when it was planned as a 10 pages short comics. Took me a while to draw it exactly as I saw it 4 years ago, even colors - with all that bright blue night.

By the way, today is July 26 - the date I  first posted My Only One au 4 years ago! It's a coincidence that today marks 4 years since I first ever posted My Only One, and also 4 years in the story since Dr. Kim and CPT. Jeon's breakup... it's not like I waited these 4 years to draw that moment, ugh... but imagine how long and painful the wait was for Dr. Kim </3

How else he could feel? They broke up, he didn't see his lover for 4 years, who completely disappeared from his life... if you remember part 40, Tae suffered so much, he couldn't live without him, and when he says "I almost gave up", he means giving up on his own life.

To be continued...