Archive of Our Own ^beta

It wasn’t that Frank hadn’t been attracted to Gerard since the beginning. He was, but Frank had always thought inter-band dating was a bad idea.

When he first met Gerard, he wasn’t comfortable in almost any part of his life and had felt weird about being attracted to another man. It made it easier to ignore, and at the time he hadn’t known Gerard’s sexuality which made it even easier to ignore his attraction towards the frontman. He was comfortable with himself, his gender identity, and sexuality by the time they started touring for Revenge, but by then he’d gotten so used to pushing down his feelings for Gerard that it almost didn’t matter. He dated freely, having one-night stands, girlfriends, boyfriends, even a polyamorous relationship for a while. Shortly after The Black Parade, Gerard got married and for a while he seemed happy.

At the time, Frank had his own relationships. He was engaged to Dylan, a guy that seemed almost perfect. Frank hadn’t realized at the time that Dylan was constantly treating him poorly. It only happened behind closed doors, and it wasn’t too bad, so he didn’t worry.

Things started to change when Dylan started suggesting Frank get pregnant. They’d talked about kids, but Frank had always been firm he didn’t want to be pregnant.

“It’s way cheaper this way.” Dylan argued.

“I can’t do it. It’ll ruin me.” Frank defended his stance.

“You’re so selfish!” Dylan scoffed.

Frank should have guessed Dylan would tamper with his birth control. Frank had been on antibiotics for another infection and insisted they use condoms. He didn’t find out until later that Dylan had poked holes in the condoms.

Dylan confessed once Frank got the news he was pregnant. The fight was bad and Frank felt like his life was falling apart. He decided to keep the pregnancy, though it wasn’t an easy decision. Then, to Dylan’s disbelief, Frank dumped him.

Once Dylan realized he wasn’t getting back together with Frank and wasn’t going to get any money from him, Dylan disappeared. Frank had been furious, not because he was going to do it alone but because it left their child with only one parent.

On October 20^th, 2009, Frank gave birth to his daughter, Rowan Willow Iero.

After the birth of Rowan, Frank became busy with his own life. He spent less time on music and didn’t see his friends much. He bought a little house in their hometown and leaned on his parents for emotional support. He didn’t see the guys much until they resumed working on Danger Days.

After the band reunited, Gerard had a kid of his own. At that point, he hadn’t even passively thought about a life with a Gerard in a long time. They had kids and very separate lives outside of the band. Gerard seemed happy with his family even if the rest of the singer’s life wasn’t something he was happy with.

So, when Gerard told them in late 2011 that he was getting a divorce, Frank was thrown.

“Repeat that. I think I misheard you.” Frank said.

“Nina and I are getting a divorce.” Gerard repeated.

He looked exhausted and generally pretty rough. The bags under his eyes looked worse than they had in a long time and they were too thin. In hindsight it was obvious that Gerard was going through something but at the time Frank was too preoccupied with his own shit to really notice.

“Why?” Frank asked and immediately cringed. “Sorry. That was insensitive.”

Gerard waved it away. “It’s fine. We’ve been friends for a long time. Things… things just weren’t working. Nina wanted me to be home more but didn’t say anything until the resentment had already built up so much. It was… it was tough.”

“What about your daughter? What’s the plan?” Frank asked.

“We’re gonna coparent Selene. Nina will have primary custody for a while, but we’re trying to keep things civil for Selene.” They said.

Frank’s heart went out to the guy, it really did, but his own kid kept him busy and it was hard to spend one on one time with Gerard when they were both so busy. He was a little jealous that Gerard and Nina were going to be able to coparent. Dylan had firmly refused anything to do with their daughter, though he was being forced by the court to pay child support. Frank was getting more support from his parents than his ex. He hadn’t even thought about kids until Dylan brought it up.

He wouldn’t trade his daughter for anything, but doing it alone was hard.

“Selene is lucky.” Frank said and Gerard smiled shyly.

Things continued with the band and eventually, it was decided My Chemical Romance would break up. At first, it was hard for Frank to wrap his head around it. The band had been such a large part of his life for around eleven years and now it’s over. He knew it was for the best, so Frank moved onto another project.

It was about six months after the band split up that Frank ran into Gerard at a restaurant. Rowan was with him, sitting in a little high chair when their eyes met across the restaurant. Mikey was with him, looking hungover and tired. Frank waved at his friends and Gerard came over.

“Hey, what’s up?” Frank asked

“Nothing. We just haven’t seen you in a while… I thought I’d say hi.” Gerard said, shuffling his feet.

Frank looked over to Mikey. “Do you guys wanna join us?”

Gerard looked back at Mikey and waved him over. “Yeah totally.”

Mikey walked over and the Way brothers joined him at the table. Most of the conversation revolved around Rowan, who soaked up the attention, and what they were currently working on. All of them had new musical projects, and Gerard was juggling co-parenting with his ex-wife. When they left the restaurant, Frank didn’t think anything would come from it. However, Gerard and Frank began texting constantly.

Suddenly, things were different. It wasn’t uncommon for Frank to text his former MCR bandmates. He texted Ray nearly every day, Mikey a few days a week, and now Gerard everyday, several times a day. They talked about everything from their new projects, their kids, their non-existent dating lives, and everything in between. He hadn’t thought much about how much they were texting until he was having lunch with Ray.

“Your phone keeps going off.” Ray said, like Frank couldn’t hear his phone buzzing.

“Yeah. It’s just Gee,” Frank says dismissively.

Ray raised an eyebrow. “What’s Gerard texting you about that’s so important?”

Frank shrugs. “Nothing, really. We were talking about a book I’m reading.”

Ray reaches his hand out towards Frank’s phone. “May I?”

Frank nods and Ray picks up the phone. His brows furrow as he scrolls and scrolls through their text messages. Frank doesn’t understand why, not at first.

“Frankie, why didn’t you tell me you’re seeing Gee?” Ray asks.

His voice isn’t judgmental, just curious but the words knock the air out of his lungs.

“What?! I’m not! I’m not seeing anyone!” Frank cries.

Ray holds his hands up, like he’s surrendering. “Okay, okay! Calm down! I didn’t mean to hit a nerve.”

Frank snatches his phone back up, holding it to his chest. “Why did you even think that?”

“Well, you guys are flirting.” Ray says simply.

“What? No we aren’t!”

This time Ray pushes back. “Yes you are. I’ve been around both of you enough to recognize when you’re flirting.”

Frank firmly denies it but when he gets home, he can’t stop thinking about it. He looks over their text messages again, thinking it over. They are flirting.

What the hell is going on?

Frankie: what r we doing

Gee: Nothing? I’m not even there

Frankie: no dumbass like whats going on btwn us

Gee: Well I like you and I was hoping I could take you out sometime

Frank sets his phone down. This has to be a joke or a dream. Only, Gerard wouldn’t do that to him. He pinched his arm but he didn’t wake.

Frankie: k

They planned it out, deciding to go to some Italian restaurant they’ve been to a million times before over the years. Frank’s mom agreed to take Rowan for the night and Frank found himself sitting anxiously at a table.

He’s just about to text Ray for encouragement when Gerard approaches the table. They look good, not as skinny as the last time Frank saw him, thankfully. Frank’s been aware of Gerard’s opinions on his weight for a long time, but he thinks they look good like this. Healthy, happy. It’s what Frank wants for him.

“Sorry I’m late,” Gerard says bashfully as they sit down. “Selene didn’t want me to go.”

Frank smiles. “I get that. Rowan isn’t too fond of me leaving either. Luckily, she loves my mom.”

Gerard smiles softly and the two of them begin looking over the menu. The main reason this place was picked is because it has more options that are easier on Frank’s stomach. After so many years of knowing each other, Gerard is well aware of Frank’s stomach issues.

Frank’s surprised by how awkward this whole thing feels. He’s known Gerard for years. They’re one of Frank’s best friends. It shouldn’t be so fucking awkward.

“This is so awkward,” Frank says for lack of anything else to say.

Gerard cracks a smile. “I know. I’ve wanted to do this for so long but now that we’re here I have no idea what to do.”

Frank’s heart begins to beat a little faster. “I’ve wanted to do this for a long time too.”

Gerard’s cheeks go pink. “Really? I was surprised when you started flirting with me. I thought you weren’t interested.”

“Not interested? I’m dumb, not blind,” Frank scoffs.

“You aren’t dumb, Frankie,” Gerard says quickly.

Frank waves his hand dismissively. “I know, I just- Gee, I’d have to be blind and dumb not to be into you.”

Gerard squirms in his seat. “Then why did you wait so long?”

“I didn’t think dating my bandmate was a good idea.”

“Oh. Yeah, that makes sense.”

Before they can continue to the conversation a bored looking waiter came their way and takes their orders. They order, hand off their menus, and then Gerard looks back to him and smiles. Gerard’s always been able to make Frank feel like it’s just the two of them regardless of the setting. In even the most crowded rooms, in places that made Frank’s skin crawl, Gerard would do this smile and suddenly it would feel like it’s just the two of them.

Frank smiles back and for once, he doesn’t ignore that warm affection that flutters to life in his chest.

Maybe, just maybe, this could be the start of something beautiful.