Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

Felix had learned long ago that dignity didn't pay tuition. Neither did pride. Therefore, once again, he was sitting at a bar, sitting among the rich- waiting for anyone to take interest in him.

He'd grown more comfortable with the job, basking in the scent of whiskey and colognes so expensive only people with black credit cards could afford them. How he'd managed to blend in with the crowd of people there? His looks.

He'd saved money for rather.. expensive yet slutty looking outfits. People loved them.

They could be covered in fake diamonds or rhinestones, and most of the time were darker colors.

Today, he wore short tight black shorts, barely long enough to cover his ass in the back, mesh tights- with an off shoulder long sleeve on, with fake rhinestone covered straps underneath, glistening in the different colored lights.

He stood at the bar, swirling around one of the drinks a man had bought him in his hand. He'd offered him a drink after spotting him alone, and Felix said yes- more to secure money for the night than to get drunk.

He stood with his forearms rested against the counter, purposefully kind of sticking his ass out to catch more attention from whoever might've been interested. After a bit of talking back and forth, the man excused himself to the restroom.

Felix thought his time had been wasted for a bit before he fixed his position, eyes moving to the crowd of people dancing against each other- rubbing their bodies flush up against one another.

Felix's eyes travelled, dark, scanning the room.

He'd noticed early on what seemed to be a table of richer men- though older, they seemed wealthy. Wealthy as in Rolex watches, Brioni suits and bottles upon bottles of fancy- expensive champagne.

He'd eyed them for a bit now. He could always shoot his shot at them.

Just then, as his eyes scanned their attire, his eyes moved to the table beside them, noticing another male looking at him. At this point, Felix was looking at him over his shoulder, so he turned slightly to look at him better.

He wasn't wearing anything that special, but he sat at a table with two other men. They all looked to be around his age, which was honestly kind of relieving in a environment like this, but at the end of the day, he was here for money- not for friends or relationships.

It wasn't until the male tilted his head- eyes still on Felix- he noticed he was staring. He fixed his posture, taking a sip of his drink, purposefully letting the man see him drink- see his adam's apple jump and how he licked his lips afterwards.

When his gaze returned to the man, he noticed him lifting two fingers in the air, signaling him over. Felix arched an eyebrow, the two locked in an intense focus on each other until Felix finally stepped forward.

He made sure to sway his hips a little, just to appear hotter on his way to the male, stopping beside him. He tilted his head, eyes observing the aura around the table. It felt more comfortable- yet scary.

Surely they couldn't be more than 3 years older than him, so he trusted them- though it always felt scary being alone amongst people your age- especially when they were not alone. It could kind of be described as being a single sheep in a group of wolves. 

Either they were full and would spare you, or they'd gang up on you, ravishing you to pieces.

The male seemed to eye his outfit before speaking. "You don't belong here," he murmured, resting against the leather lounge- legs crossed like he owned the place- bringing a glass of champagne to his lips.

Felix let out a soft laugh. "Neither do you."

The man smirked, putting the glass back to the table, "Fair," he said and paused. Then suddenly, without much thought, he asked: "How much?"

Felix raised an eyebrow, attempting to hide the way his stomach twisted, but he forced a smile to his lips. Business, you need this. Though, he hated selling his body to strangers. "Depends on what you want."

The man didn't answer right away. Instead, he traced a finger along the rim of the glass, almost as if he were weighing his options. Felix then noticed a couple rings on his fingers. They looked.. expensive.

It was unfair. Growing up rich- not having to worry about money.

The man then looked back at Felix, voice smooth and controlled. "I want you for the night." he kept a straight face.

Felix exhaled slowly, pushing down the shame threatening to burn through his body. He named a price, it was the standard price he offered everyone. He expected the man to have some reaction on his face, but his facial expression stayed the same, he didn't even look shocked at the price.

"That's it?" He raised an eyebrow, an obvious smirk threatening to tug at his lips. "You're worth more than that," he said.

"How would you know?" Felix asked, tilting his head. The man shrugged. "A guess, I assume. I mean, your body is worth at least double that price- not to speak for how good you actually are."

Felix's eyes darkened a bit. "So you'd pay double? Is that what you're saying?" 

"We'll see about that," The man's eyes narrowed. "Come with me." 

Felix glanced at the unfinished bottle of champagne on the table, and how he'd left it there as if the leftovers alone weren't worth a couple hefty bucks. He figured his friends or whoever the others were maybe would finish it.

And that's how he went home with a stranger for the night- once again.

The car the man brought him to was.. fancy, as well. He didn't know much about it, but it just looked expensive. He'd never seen that logo before, though. It must've been so expensive he didn't even know of its existence.

He couldn't even figure out the door handle, but luckily the man helped him with it. 

The inside was dark- brown leather and a dark brown interior. It was so crazy clean, it almost felt like a rented car. It didn't even have a gear stick- how was that possible?

He sat in silence most of the ride, except for the few times the male spoke to him. "What's your name?" Felix, "You've never been in a car like this before?" no. "You were looking for a one night stand tonight- right?" No- but yes. More for the money than the orgasm. 

When the car pulled to a stop, it was in the expensive end of the city. A big apartment complex, with at least 15 floors. Intimidating- no? Was that just Felix who thought that?

The parking lot was underground, and you had to use a keycard to access the elevator. Rich people shit- really. 

He absentmindedly watched the man press one of the top floors, and kept in mind how they were in the elevator for probably 30 seconds. 

When the elevator came to a stop, the man showed him to his door, which was in a hallway with only two-three more doors. The man unlocked the door, revealing a seemingly big but dark home.

When the lights switched on though, Felix's heart almost dropped. This must've been.. one of his riches clients yet. The home was big, massive, floor to ceiling windows, a jaw-dropping view, dark wood everywhere and marble every here and there.

Felix toed off his shoes, following the male through the home. "Name your price again?" the man asked, and Felix searched his mind for the number- still a bit surprised from the home he'd been brought to. They were now standing in the kitchen, and Felix could easily spot the racks of wine bottles in the back.

The man pulled out his wallet from a pocket in his pants, flipping it open easily and placing a couple bills on the counter. Felix glanced at it- it was more than he named. A generous amount of money- more than he usually got.

He forced a smirk to his lips, resisting the urge to count the amount. "You always pay first?" 

The brunet leaned against the counter, watching him. "I don't like unfinished business."

Felix nodded, taking another second to glance around the room. "You want something to drink?" the man offered. Felix shook his head. "No thank you," he always made sure to never be drunk on the job. He could get taken advantage of or scammed. He didn't want to risk either of those things.

"Alright, where do you want me?" Felix asked, brushing a strand of hair behind his ear.

The male eyed his body, wallet still in hand. "Take off your shirt." Felix felt his cheeks burn. This whole job was so humiliating, but he had no other choice. He reached for the hem of his shirt, maintaining eye contact with the male as he pulled it over his head, throwing it to the ground. 

The male's gaze darkened. "Do you want me to call you 'Sir'?" Felix asked, stepping closer to the male. 

He grabbed the tallers belt, unbuckling it with ease while staring into his eyes. God, those eyes were scary. Mono-lidded, dark, hungry eyes. Like a predator staring at it's prey. Intimidating.

The man chuckled, "Is that what they usually want?" he asked.

Felix paused for a second, then broke eye contact to look at the belt instead. "They usually want a lot of things." He forced a smile on himself, just to seem friendlier. The man's hand suddenly grabbed Felix's wrist, stopping him. Felix looked up, startled, meeting those dark, unreadable eyes.

"I don't want you to pretend," he murmured, staring down at Felix. 

Felix blinked. Then, quickly, he forced another smirk to his lips. "That's not how this works.." he pulled free from the mans wrist and sank to his knees. The male stared, letting him do so. 

Felix resumed unbuckling the belt, hearing a rustling sound from above. He moved his eyes up, staring at the man through his eyelashes. The man pulled another few bills from his wallet. "Here, is this enough?"

Felix swallowed, eyeing the bills. "Enough for what?.."

"For you to drop the act other men want and be yourself." 

Felix gulped. No one had ever requested that. Everyone just wanted him to be.. obedient? Like a pet? "I've never done that before.." he admitted, eyes following Hyunjin's eyes as he laid the money onto the previously existing pile.

"Do it for me. It's not like we'll ever see each other again anyway, right? Well, I mean, that depends on how good you are.. If you're good, I might hire you again." he used his fingers to turn Felix's head up towards him. Normally that act disgusted him, but right now, he didn't really care. It was too much money to turn down.

"I can try, but I can't assure you it'll be something you enjoy.. I don't normally act so.." he trailed off. The man hummed, running a finger across Felix's jawline. "It's alright. I'd like to see your true self, Felix."

Felix gulped. He was never really called by his name despite the people asking for it.

"Okay," Felix met his eyes again before unbuttoning his fly. "What.. what do you want me to refer to you as?"

The mans eyes narrowed. "Hyunjin. Call me Hyunjin."

"Hyunjin, okay." 

"Tell me, Felix- how old are you?" Hyunjin asked, letting go of his chin.

Felix swallowed. "Twenty.."

Hyunjin seemed to take in the number. "Okay," he said with a straight face like always. "Why do you do this at such a young age?"

"I don't have to answer that," Felix murmured, pulling Hyunjin's pants down, leaving him in his briefs. It was personal, he wasn't obliged to answer that. Hyunjin fumbled through his wallet again, though, placing a couple more bills on the counter. Felix felt humiliated, "I need to pay for my tuition.."

"Tuition? Can't your parents do it?" Hyunjin asked, sounding different for once. Surprised.

"They're not quite in the picture anymore," Felix murmured, palming Hyunjin through his briefs. "Not everyone grows up in a wealthy family- you know?"

Hyunjin bit his lip. He wanted to ask, but it wasn't necessary. He didn't need to know. He knew he was privileged, but he wasn't spoilt, and he was grateful for it. "Then.. aren't you.." he shut himself up with a groan at Felix's hand rubbing over him-applying slightly more pressure.

"Enough with the personal questions," Felix said, hooking his fingers over the hem of Hyunjin's briefs. "We came here for a reason."

Hyunjin's eyes remained dark, but he let Felix do what he wanted. Well- did he want it? Did he just do it for the money? Not even pleasure?

He slowly pulled the underwear down, gulping at the sight in front of him. He wasn't even that hard- he looked rather.. just a little turned on. Felix pushed the thought aside, grabbing the mans length, feeling how it was actually a little heavy. Well, he was a nice size so it made sense.

He looked at the man. If he had to act like himself now- which he got paid for- he probably wouldn't look hot at all. He would probably turn the male off. So despite saying he'd try, he put on a fake smirk.

He brought the tip of the length to his lips, licking the head. Hyunjin let out a low groan, moving his hand to the back of Felix's head, keeping it there.

Felix took the first bit of the length into his mouth, running his tongue flat on the bottom side. Hyunijn hummed contently, caressing Felix's head. It was different from the other men who usually bought him. They preferred to just have Felix sit still while they used his mouth, merely using his as an.. object.

But obviously that made for the job, so he always knew what he was getting himself into.

If only his first client had been Hyunjin instead of that 32 year old.

Well, it could've been worse.

There had been multiple creeps offering to get a night with him once, but they weren't the rich type. They rather looked like dealers or gang members who'd buy Felix and sell him for his body parts or something.

Luckily, he knew to watch out for those people, and always had his location sent to his friends. Seungmin, Jisung and Changbin. They always had his back, and checked up just in case.

He took in more of Hyunjin, feeling him poke at the back of his throat. He moaned- unintentionally, but, Hyunjin wanted him to be real, right?- and bobbed his head back and forth a couple times.

If he wasn't being paid for this, he'd say Hyunjin was rather.. different than the rest. Better?

He didn't force anything upon Felix, and he had odd requests- questions. No one really cared about him like that either. Well, they didn't have to. He just had to make them cum and he was gone again.

Hyunjin though- not only was he the youngest person who'd hired him, but he was the hottest as well. He had a nice symmetrical face, with pretty narrow intimidating eyes. Plump lips, clear skin, beautiful dark brown hair with a few strands in front of his eyes.

Felix didn't notice he was staring at his face until Hyunjin smirked. He moved his eyes away again, embarrassed- continuing his job. 

After a bit he pulled away, looking at Hyunjin. "Don't you want to do it yourself?" he asked. Hyunjin shook his head. "No, I want you to do it. I wanna see what you got, your skill. Why would I pay to do the job myself?"

Felix's breath hitched slightly, quickly returning to Hyunjin's dick, taking him deeper. "Yeah, just like that, Felix. It feels good, you're good." He'd never really gotten praised like that. They always just said he was a pet- and pets were meant to be good, so he was just like the others.

Fucking idiots. If they weren't paying him, he'd bite their dicks off.

Hyunjin let out a low hum, tightening his grip in Felix's hair, but not enough to hurt or pull any out. "Felix, pull off." he said, and Felix did, breathing heavily at the man in front of him. "What?"

"Get up, we're finding a more comfortable spot." He announced, helping Felix up, grabbing his shirt while he was at it. "Your money will stay on the counter- grab it before you leave later." 

Hyunjin dragged him through the house by the wrist. It was so big and modern, it quite literally looked like one of those houses you only ever saw in movies or could rent out for 5000 dollars minimum per day.

But that wasn't what he was there for. He was there to give Hyunjin what he wanted, so instead, he looked at him, asking a question which- wasn't really something he did when off the job, but Hyunjin didn't have to know. Besides, as Felix said earlier, if he acted like himself and not how other men wanted him to, Hyunjin would for sure get soft rather than hard.

So, he tried. "Where are you taking me, Hyunjin?"

Don't ask, pet. 

"To my room. Is that alright?" Hyunjin looked back at him.

I don't care if it's comfortable for you. You want the money, right?

"What are you gonna do to me in there?" Felix put on a innocent face.

I'll do whatever I want- and you'll let me, correct?

"I'll show you later. You're fine with everything, right?" Hyunjin asked.

Oh wow, his answers were so different than what he'd expected, and from what his other clients answered. Like he actually cared- like he knew he was a human at the end of the day.

"I'm fine with pretty much anything.. except knife play or anything with.. you know."

Hyunjin nodded, opening a door, revealing a nice room with a whole wall- if it could even be called that- with floor to ceiling windows, showing a bunch of greenery outside, with a big bed in the middle, another door in the room- presumably a bathroom, a big sliding door- probably a closet, and a bunch of paintings hung over the wall.

"You paint?" Felix asked. It was kind of random but he figured Hyunjin was different, and maybe it'd be fine to ask. "I do, yes." Hyunjin responded, shutting the door behind them. 

Felix smirked, thinking of something. "Well you seem good at it. Do you want to paint me?"

Hyunjin raised an eyebrow, "Paint you?"

Felix giggled, "Not in paint, but in your.. cum."

Hyunjin seemed a little surprised at what he said, but smirked nonetheless. "No, I'd rather have you take my cum up your ass." Felix blushed a little. It was normal for clients to want that, but something about Hyunjin.. was he blushing 'cause it was hot or because it was embarrassing?

"Come here," Hyunjin signaled him over to the bed, patting the silk sheets. It was a big bed. Felix sat on it, immediately being pushed down afterwards. He let out a quiet gasp, biting the inside of his cheek afterwards to shut himself up.

"You're so pretty, Kitty." 

Felix's eyes widened at the name, "Kitty? That's your choice?"

"What? What else would you like? Puppy? Maybe you're a dog person..?"

Felix shut himself up, looking around the room. The ceiling was high, with beautiful wall trim surrounding the walls. "I'm just not used to those names.."

"What are you used to, then? What do other people call you?" Hyunjin asked, playing with the hem of Felix's shorts. Felix puckered his lips, thinking. "Slut? Toy? Pet, things like that- I don't know. I usually don't pay attention to it."

"Huh," Hyunjin's tongue poked at his cheek. "That's a shame. You're more than that." 

Felix chuckled, "Yet you've bought me for tonight. Paid for my time. Am I worth that much if I can just be bought?"

Hyunjin didn't answer, but Felix noticed how his eyebrow raised just a bit, edge of his lip twitching a bit- maybe into a smirk? Instead, he just tugged at Felix's shorts, pulling them off in one tug.

Felix pressed his thighs together at the sudden exposure, feeling Hyunjin move between his legs. "Do you know how old I am, Felix?"

Felix moaned a bit at the friction between his legs, feeling Hyunjin rub a knee against him. He then moved his hands to rip off Felix's tights, making Felix frown. Those were my favorite..

"Don't worry Kitty, I'll compensate you for those as well." Hyunjin said, tossing the thin ripped material aside onto the floor where Felix's shirt also lied.

Now Felix was just in his underwear, feeling a little exposed. He'd done it multiple times, but it just felt embarrassing when it was someone close to him in age. Well, he was, right?

"No, you never told me your age.." he practically whispered, shivering when Hyunjin leaned down to his ear. "I'm twenty one.. That's only a year older than you."

Felix felt so ashamed he had to resort to doing this at his age when Hyunjin was doing the opposite. If only he'd been born in a better environment.

"That makes it less scary." Felix admitted. "Do older men usually hire you?" Hyunjin asked, lips hovering over his neck. "Yeah.." Felix replied truthfully, because he'd never see Hyunjin again, and though it was embarrassing, it was the truth. Didn't matter if it embarrassed him now, because he'd never seen any one of the people he'd spent a night with ever again, so what was the chance of seeing Hyunjin again?

"They're probably taking advantage of you, because you're so young." Hyunjin kissed Felix featherly directly on his sweet spot, causing him to twitch a bit. "I need the money. It doesn't matter as I'm not a minor anyway.."

"Still, they're creeps."

"Or maybe they just wanted to fuck someone, and I was coincidentally right there." Felix said, gasping a bit as Hyunjin tightened his grip around his waist. "You're a bit sassy," he muttered, licking right at Felix's sweet spot.

Felix moaned a little, "You said you wanted to see my true self. This is it, I guess."

Hyunjin pulled himself off of Felix. "Maybe, or maybe it's because you don't actually like this job. Don't like selling yourself life this. Why don't you try a job at a clothing store or.. tutoring?"

"I have another part time job, and when my days are filled with work and school, I don't have time to tutor unless I don't study for myself. On the days I don't have work, I do this. I don't have time to tutor, and my job's pay has to go to rent and food and school."

Hyunjin frowned a bit upon hearing that. "Well, how much more do you need to pay?"

Felix whimpered a bit, "I don't know. I mean I don't just need money for tuition, with all my necessities added together, I can't give a accurate number." he squirmed a bit, Hyunjin still nibbling at that one spot on his neck, as if he knew that that was his sweet spot. 

Hyunjin held him down firmly, not saying much anymore. He just went on to strip him from his last piece of clothing- carefully prepping him, then fucking him. It was different- much softer and more careful than the other people.

Felix had insisted Hyunjin could do a little more than what he wanted, but Hyunjin- on the other hand- insisted that he made Felix feel good too. Saying as it was their first time, he'd take things slow.

First time? 

We probably won't run into each other again.

The possibilities are at least low.

Hyunjin surprisingly made Felix cum twice- which he hadn't really ever tried without a break in between- but there's a first to everything, right?

He'd say Hyunjin was rather like a fresh flower hidden amongst dead ones. All the other men, rough, careless of Felix's feelings, degrading, old- but Hyunjin? He was kind, it at least felt like he cared and validated his feelings a little, and he wasn't degrading. Well, he as well was a little rough- but he wasn't treating Felix like a toy with no feelings.

By the time it was all over, they were lying in Hyunjin's bed, both drifting off to sleep. Well, at least that's what Hyunjin thought. Felix never quite spend the night. Instead, he waited for Hyunjin to be still for multiple minutes- no squirming around- an indication he was asleep, and slowly sat up.

He was really exhausted, but he knew better than to spend the night. It would definitely be awkward the morning after. 

He quietly crept across the floor, picking up his scattered clothing from off the floor, putting it on. 

It was definitely uncomfortable wearing tight shorts and a shirt like that after being exhausted and spent, but he'd be home in.. 40 minutes? 

He crept out to the kitchen, grabbing his phone and the money Hyunjin had placed there earlier. He shoved it in a pocket and left. Maybe he wished to have said a proper thanks to Hyunjin- but it wasn't necessary.

At the end of the day, he wasn't getting paid to make friends or be friendly. It was to get the job done- give his clients an orgasm- and obey. Really.

Once he'd gotten home, he counted the money while brushing his teeth. It was.. a lot. More than the price for two clients. Hyunjin was.. very rich, apparently. Being able to just throw money like that.

Felix didn't mind. It'd help him a lot.

He shoved his money into a empty envelope, getting ready to transfer it to his bank account the next day.

Now, it wasn't that he was broke- he had a couple thousands, but he always preferred more money than less- so he worked every shift he got offered at the restaurant he worked at, and on his free days after studying always went to search for men to seduce.

He heard a door open, and saw his roommate walk out his bedroom, rubbing his eyes. 

"You're home late again, Felix." Seungmin mumbled, coming up next to him. "Sorry- did I wake you? I was just counting the money."

"No, it's fine.. I couldn't really sleep," he yawned, hugging Felix from the back. "Did you find another client?" 

"Yeah. It was actually a 21 year old guy, he gave me a lot." Felix smiled, looking at Seungmin who rested his head on his shoulder. "Hm.. that's good- but I've told you multiple times I can pay for the rent myself. You don't need to worry."

"No, I'll do it, Min. I got it, don't worry."

Seungmin smiled, "Okay, if you say so. Get some rest, didn't you say you had a shift tomorrow at the restaurant around lunch time?" 

Felix nodded, "I'm going now, don't worry. You should get some sleep too, I'll be quiet."

"Okay, goodnight Lix." Seungmin yawned again, dragging his feet back to his room. 

"Goodnight Min, I love you."

"Love you.." he shut his door quietly, Felix also yawning now. It was exhausting- really, but at the end of the day, it was all worth it when you had a roommate like Seungmin.

Chapter Text

Felix was running late for his morning class. Seungmin was waiting for him at their front door, rushing him. 

"Felix! Come on, we have 15 minutes!"

"I'm- coming!" He fumbled, jumping on one leg while putting his shoe on. He swung his bag over a shoulder, grabbing his keys and locking the door for the two of them. "Good, now come on!" Seungmin rushed down the stairs, Felix almost tripping behind him.

They lived a good 10-15 minutes from campus, but they needed to get their books as well, along with actually getting to their class. 

Normally Seungmin would get a coffee, but he had to skip this morning, and Felix felt so bad, he promised to buy him one after school. They ran the whole way there- seeing at it was the first day after summer break- and it wouldn't look so good being late on the first day.

They barely even waited for the light to turn green before sprinting across the road, finally on college grounds. Felix had to stop to catch his breath, whining when Seungmin continued dragging him along. "Changbin and Jisung are waiting for us, you can do it, Lix."

"Ah I can't- I think I'm gonna die.." He groaned, but followed with quick steps nonetheless when Seungmin continued dragging him. Soon enough, they saw Jisung and Changbin bickering about something near their lockers. Felix smiled, practically falling into Jisung's arms. "Save me from him.." he referred to Seungmin, who just rolled his eyes.

"Felix, we would've been late if we didn't run. It's fine.." 

"But I'm so hot now.." Felix ran a hand through his gold locks, opening his locker, fanning his face with one hand while searching through his books with the other. "You're always hot, don't worry, Lix." Jisung smirked, leaning against the locker next to Felix's.

Felix smirked, sending Jisung a kiss. "I know, but I didn't mean in that way."

Suddenly Seungmin smacked Jisung, causing him to frown deeply. "You're leaning against my locker idiot." 

"Jeez, sorry.." Jisung frowned, moving to stand by Changbin instead. "Which classes do you two have? I'm apparently stuck in art class for my first lesson." Jisung rolled his eyes. He was never really one to like art.

Changbin chuckled, "That's such a good class to start off with. I have science. Who can do that at 8 in the morning?" he huffed, pouting.

Seungmin chuckled, checking his phone. "I have.. ugh, kill me already." 

They all smiled, looking at Seungmin, "What do you have?"

"I have art. With Jisung. Changbin- should we switch identities? I'll take science, you can have Ji."

Jisung put on an over exaggerated angry face at Seungmin before Changbin patted his back. "It's okay, Sungie. At the end of the day, you know Seungmin loves you. There's nothing he wouldn't do for you," he lightly punched Seungmin. "Right?"

Seungmin put on a fake smile. "Right-" he said through gritted teeth. They all laughed a bit at that, and Felix checked his new and updated schedule for the semester. "I have math. That's fine, I guess."

"You know.. Art with Ji doesn't sound so bad after all. You two really are unlucky." Seungmin shut his locker, holding his art book in hand. "Well, we can just text throughout the day, and at lunch, let's sit at our usual table, just so we are able to find each other."

"Okay, I'll see you two, Changbin, we're headed in the same direction, right?" Felix smiled, shutting his locker as well. "Yup, I believe we are. Bye Ji, bye Min!" 

"Bye," the two others trailed off, leaving Felix and Changbin alone. "I have a shift tomorrow at the restaurant," Felix frowned, clutching his book tightly in his arms. "I had a shift yesterday- on my last day of summer break. That should be illegal to do to someone. And worse than that, I have to stand at the reception again today. Lord kill me."

Felix giggled, "No, It's okay. At least you'll get paid. Then you can buy more of those stuffed animals you've been collecting." Changbin lightly hit him on his arm. "Shh, don't say that out loud.. No one else should hear."

Felix put on a guilty smile, "I'm sorry, Changbin- but it's not anything to be embarrassed-" Felix's words got cut off when he collided with another student, dropping both his bag and his book.

"Oh no, I'm sorry!" he apologized, leaning down to pick up his bag. The brunet brushed his hair aside, getting Felix's book for him. "It's no problem, it ha-" he trailed off, looking Felix in the face. 

Felix looked back at him upon seeing him freeze, feeling his heart drop itself. "Wait.. aren't you-" Felix blushed, grabbing his book from the other's hand, "Sorry- I'm late," he ran off with Changbin, practically dragging the older up the stairs.

"What? What was that? Felix?" Changbin asked, looking at Felix's flushed expression. "It was nothing, sorry." It was Hyunjin. "We're just late," he smiled, hearing the bell ring. 

"Oh shit," Changbin cursed, running up the stairs as well. "Okay- I'll see you at lunch, okay?"

"Yeah, see you!" Felix ran into his class, hiding in far back corner. No, no no no, that wasn't Hyunjin. Hahah, that was just another person with monolids and.. a mole under their eye and.. with a symmetrical face and a similar lip shape.. For fucks sake, monolids were common in Korea. That hairstyle was common among Korean college students.

No, it wasn't Hyunjin. It couldn't be. He hadn't seen him at all last semester or.. the year before that.. If Hyunjin was rich, he could find a private university to study at. Besides, why would he move to another college two years in?

Felix dropped his head on his desk, trying to calm his beating heart which was both beating from running, and from.. Hyunjin? Except it wasn't Hyunjin.. was it? No, it definitely was. No- it.. couldn't have been. But it defi- 

"Excuse me?" A voice said, Felix shot straight up, putting on a fake smile. "Yeah?" 

"Are you okay?" a male asked, appearance oddly similar to that of a fox.. "Yeah- sorry. I'm just, exhausted." 

The boy smiled, sitting beside him. "I hope you don't mind.. I get it, though. First day after such a long break of sleeping in and doing nothing? It's hard." 

Felix smiled, "Definitely is.. I have a feeling today is gonna be.. a long day." 

The boy smiled. "It'll be fun, meeting new people, right? I'm Jeongin." 

Felix smiled even wider. "Felix," he shot a glance at the classroom. Well, the teacher wasn't there yet. "You were so unlucky to get math too in the morning?" he asked.

Felix nodded, then shrugged. "I mean, I don't have a issue with math. It's fine, I guess. Mainly because I understand it. If I didn't, I think I'd be worse." He chuckled. Jeongin nodded. "I agree. When I understand what we're doing, it's nice. When not, it's hell."

Felix giggled, "Speaking of hell, it's hot today, isn't it?"

Jeongin shook his head while smiling. "It is.. so annoying. I practically got a tan on my way from my car to the school."

"Damn," Felix chuckled. "Good thing I brought the biggest water bottle I own with me to-day.. Where is my water bottle?" he frowned, realizing it wasn't in his bag. "Oh goodness.. Did I forget it?" he asked, more so to himself.

"No, I definitely packed it. Hm.. I might've left it in my locker.." he mumbled, thinking back on when he collided with maybe-Hyunjin. "Did I drop it there?" 

"Drop it where?" Jeongin asked. Felix blushed- he hadn't meant to say that out loud. "Oh! Nothing.. just thinking.. I'll find it later, I wasn't thirsty right now anyway." 

Jeongin nodded suspiciously, "Well, you can always get a bottle from the cafeteria." 

"Right, I can." Felix smiled, turning his attention to the professor that'd walked in class. "Ready for 3 hours of math?" Felix whispered to Jeongin. Jeongin's face fell into his hands, groaning. 

Okay, it's fine.. In just 9 times 20 minutes, I'm with Seungmin, Jisung and Changbin again. Hopefully reunited with my water bottle. I hope they have it..

...

Felix got himself a lunch tray from the cafeteria, walking along with Jeongin. "I have to find my friends, and I think I know what table they are sat at." Felix smiled, looking at Jeongin. "You're free to join us if you want."

Jeongin smiled, "Thanks, but I'm trying to find some of my friends as well."

"Alright, any idea where they are?" 

Jeongin shrugged. "I'll find them. They're pretty outstanding." Felix giggled a bit at that, "Alright."

As the two approached the table Felix and his friends usually sat at, it seemed to be already occupied. Felix frowned a little, where were his friends then?

Jeongin sat his tray down, sitting beside one of the boys there. "Felix, these are my friends. This is Minho," he pointed to a dark haired, kind of intimidating looking guy, "Chris," there was a sweet smiley male there, "and last but not least, Hyunjin. He's the worst of them all, he's..." Felix didn't really hear the last part, his hearing turning fuzzy, eyes glued to Hyunjin's eyes. They looked dark, almost as if judging Felix, but then yet he seemed to be smirking a bit. 

"Felix!" he heard Jisung yell from a table just a few steps away. "Oh, those are my friends- I gotta go, nice meeting you all." he turned before they could say anything else, biting his lip in embarrassment. No, it was definitely that Hyunjin. The one from a couple weeks ago..

He sat his tray on the table, sitting beside Jisung. "Felix, why are you so red?" Seungmin asked, sitting across from him. "Oh, it's super hot today. I lost my water bottle so I've been thirsting the whole day.. Speaking of, do you guys perchance have it?"

Seungmin looked at the two others, then shook his head. "No, I don't have it."

"Me neither," Jisung frowned. Changbin shook his head as well. "Not me, maybe you left it at home?"

"No I'm sure I brought it, because I knew it'd be hot. I think I.. Changbin, you remember when I bumped into someone earlier today? Yeah, I think I dropped it there.." 

Seungmin and Jisung glanced at each other. "When did that happen?"

"After we split ways," Felix took a bite of his food. "But maybe it's at the principals office, then.. I'll go ask after eating. But, tell me about your classes, guys. Changbin, how'd it go in science?"

Changbin chuckled, "It was fun, we tried this little experiment. It was fun."

"That's good.. What about you two? What did you do in art?"

Jisung and Seungmin both shrugged at the same time. "We had to draw something from a picture- like as inspiration, so we played Roblox and pretended to use the characters as inspiration when the teacher came. I mean we did draw the characters, and Jisung he- because we played a bunch of games- drew my avatar getting sucked into a tornado, because he played Natural Disaster Survival."

Felix slammed his head into his palm, "You two, I swear.."

Changbin giggled, "Why do you hate each other so much yet not?" 

Jisung frowned, "He always starts it. The reason I drew him in a tornado, was because the teacher needed someone to copy the drawing they drew on the board. What the fuck do you think is going through my head when he tells the teacher I volunteered? Humiliated me in front of everyone when my drawing came out shit." 

Felix giggled, poking at his food. "You should've said you didn't want to anyway," 

Jisung shook his head, "Everyone turned to look at me, and Seungmin cheered me on. It was too embarrassing to say no. Besides, the teacher said we had art class for a reason, and everyone starts off somewhere. She also said it was harder to draw on white and blackboards, so it made sense I wasn't that good.. I don't know if that should've made me feel better or worse though.."

The rest of them giggled a bit. "You're ridiculous," 

"No, you are, Seungmin." Jisung furrowed his brows, only causing Seungmin to laugh harder. 

And as much as Felix loved Seungmin, he had to admit, he was really good at getting on ones nerves.

After they finished eating- or more so, Felix finished eating, he went to the principal's office, and luckily, a student had handed it in, so there was that, he didn't have to worry it'd ended in the hands of.. a certain someone.

And he'd gone home with Seungmin after finding it, obviously cleaning it well to be safe. 

He didn't know which student handed it in, but he didn't want to know either, to be honest..

He'd considered going to a club or bar after finishing his homework, but he was a little afraid of running into Hyunjin, though it'd never happened that he ran into his clients again. Hyunjin went to the same college he went to, and that meant he was in the area.

Well, he lived a while further from campus than Felix, so maybe if he started going to bar's in the opposite direction of where Hyunjin lived, he could prevent running into him, but he decided to give himself a break, just taking the day off to rest a little.

Besides, he had a shift at the restaurant tomorrow from four to eight, so he deserved a little rest.

...

As he stood in the restaurant, he was in the break room, already halfway through his shift. It was around six o'clock now, and people were really starting to pour in- as, naturally, it was dinner time.

He tied the apron back around his body, tightening it at the back, grabbing his notebook and stepping back out again. Luckily, his section wasn't too packed with people yet- unlike the other tables, and he was able to stroll calmly around.

But, of course, the universe wasn't on his side when his coworker called out for him. "Felix, you have table six, right?"

"Mh, I do." he said, balancing some plates on a tray. "Great, I seated someone at the table for you," She said, "Okay," Felix made his way to the table with what seemed like a family, handing them their food. He turned his attention to table six, sighing deeply at the sight. 

He'd thought he'd gotten lucky when he hadn't seen Hyunjin the whole day at school- figured that maybe what they'd done in the past would stay in the past, but upon seeing him there with his friends, he felt a lump in his throat. God, this would be a long shift.

He stayed away for a while until- was it Minho?- flagged him over. He took his time getting there, putting on his usual work-smile. "Hey, welcome in, what can I get for you?" he asked, pen pointed, ready to note down their order.

Minho smiled, "Felix, right? From yesterday?"

Jeongin peeked his head out from behind Hyunjin at the name, "Felix? Oh my gosh hi! I didn't know you worked here," 

Felix smiled, "Gotta pay rent somehow," he noticed the way Hyunjin smirked a bit at that- though his eyes weren't on him, he could just feel it.

Jeongin smiled, "Well, I'd like the pasta- this one.." he showed him the menu, Felix writing down the name of it afterwards. It all went fine, normal, like regular customers, until he had to note down Hyunjin's order.

"Well, I'm not quite sure yet on what I want.."

Of course you aren't, you haven't even looked through the menu.

"What'd you recommend?" he smiled at Felix. Felix puckered his lips. "Well, the steak is good, seems suiting for a guy like you. The peking duck is good too."

Hyunjin opened the menu, looking at the two options Felix gave. "Okay, I'll try the steak then." 

"Great." he wrote it down in his notebook, "how would you like it?"

"I'd like it medium," 

"Okay," Felix smiled, "Drinks?" 

"I want a soda." Jeongin smiled, Chris nodding. "Me too." Minho nodded too, chuckling a bit. "Yeah, I think I'll take a soda too." But of course, Hyunjin had to be different. "Surprise me. Don't worry about the price."

Felix raised an eyebrow, "Alright.." he just added another soda. He wasn't being paid to impress people, and he didn't live in America where his pay was based off of tips, so he just did what necessary.

"Alright, I'll be out with your drinks in a moment, and your food in.. ten minutes or so." he smiled, turning to leave when he heard a voice call out to him. "Felix," 

He froze, slowly turning on his heels. "Yes?" he smiled at Hyunjin, though it was an obvious fake one. 

"Nothing. I just wanted to see if you would look at me. You seemed to avoid my gaze before." Felix could see Minho kick his leg under the table. "Please, ignore him. He's an idiot." Felix chuckled, nodding, then left again.

To say Hyunjin seemed rather impressed when Felix brought out four sodas was definitely unexpected. He thought Hyunjin would be disappointed, but he seemed rather amused. 

The rest of the evening seemed to fly by quickly- he served multiple tables, almost forgetting about Hyunjin and his friends until they flagged him down to pay. 

Felix smiled, now exhausted from all the back and forth walking between tables. "That'll be 120.000 won please." 

Hyunijn handed him a card, and Felix scanned the card, handing it back to Hyunjin. "Thank you very much for dining, have a great evening." he smiled, walking away from them again, waiting for them to leave to clean their table.

He was just talking a bit with a coworker when he noticed them getting up to leave. He grabbed an empty tray, heading over to stack their plates on top of it. Jeongin waved him goodbye, talking about seeing him at school the next day, while Chris and Minho smiled, rushing Hyunjin to follow them. Hyunjin- though- grabbed Felix's wrist when he leaned over to grab Jeongin's empty plate. 

"Felix," 

"What?" 

"Why do you seem so.. awkward around me? Like you're ignoring me?"

Felix frowned, "I'm not. I'm just doing my job." 

Hyunjin raised an eyebrow. "Then what about in school? Why do you ignore me then?"

"I have stuff to get done.." he pressed his lips together, as if unsure if his answer even was the truth. 

Hyunjin seemed to scan his face for a second before sighing. "Is it because we slept together?"

Felix blushed, looking around to make sure no one else heard. "Don't talk about that here, it's private business.." 

"Then where can we talk about it? You don't seem interested in starting conversation at school."

"Because you were just a client- a one night stand. I'm not obliged to stay in touch with my clients after getting the job done."

Hyunjin bit his lip, seemingly thinking. "Then.. I'd like to hire you again. I want you for another night."

Felix's stomach twisted a bit- a reminder he never really liked the job. His fingers tightened around the glass he held. "Not here, not now. If you want me, you'll have to find me on a night when I'm out. Right now, I'm not on that job, so you can't hire me."

Hyunjin didn't blink, tongue poking at the side of his cheek. Without putting much thought into it, he reached into his pocket, pulling out his wallet. Felix saw how it was filled with both cards and bills.

Then, in a deliberate movement, he grabbed Felix's free hand and held it out, dropping one million won cold in his hands. Felix's breath hitched, "That.. it doesn't work like that.." he said quietly- voice almost a whisper.

Hyunjin's eyes darkened a bit, leaning in to whisper in his ear. "Wait for me outside school tomorrow after class. If you come home with me, I'll double the pay." and then he got up, leaving Felix with the money in his hands- unsure of what he was supposed to even do with it.

"But- I didn't even agree yet.." he said- more to himself as Hyunjin was already far from him, tightening his grip around the money. He huffed.. should he go?.. It was good pay, but it felt.. awkward- wrong?..

He sighed, shutting his eyes, considering it for a moment. It could go wrong if he agreed- but two million won for one night? It was a lot..

Chapter Text

Felix swore he wouldn't do it. He didn't plan on going out to a club or bar to get laid anyway, but he didn't have to when he already found a client. But, was it then a good idea? No, it wasn't- but it was a lot of money. 

It could pay his rent for a month- maybe even two..

He bit his lip in class, leg bouncing as he watched the clock ticking by. Well, he was off in 5 minutes, so should he wait for Hyunjin or not.. 

No, he'd just go home.

But, then he could take a couple days off from sleeping with.. likely older men.

The question was easy- would he rather sleep with Hyunjin- a 21 year old- or older men- possibly 50+ year old's. 

Obviously the answer was Hyunjin, but then at the same time- did he want to?

No, not quite- but it paid well. Fuck it, he'd just go. Worst thing possible, he'd just leave and give Hyunjin his money back. Yeah- that'd.. be fine.

I'll just go, it can't be that bad.. besides, he was rather kind in bed- good as well.

He sighed, stretching his arms when the teacher shut off the PowerPoint he was previously speaking about. "Okay class, you're off, see you tomorrow." 

Fuck-ass, there's still three minutes left of class?! 

Well, he'd be happy any other day, but seriously? Today?

He took his time gathering his things together, slowly dragging himself out the classroom, shoving his books in his locker and strolling to the front entrance of the school. It all felt fine, he sat down, staring down at his phone a bit- until a shadow shielded him from the sun.

He stared up, for some reason expecting Jisung or Seungmin- maybe even a rando, but of course it was Hyunjin. It just caught him off guard.

It was at that moment he felt a pit in his stomach. Oh gosh, was this really a good idea?

"Glad to see you here, Felix." Hyunjin smirked, looking down at him.

Felix swallowed, getting up, though Hyunjin still towered over him. "You promised to double the pay. That's why I’m here."

"Just for the money? Not me at all?" Hyunjin raised an eyebrow.

"It's my job, okay? I'm not doing this 'cause I like the job, I'm doing it 'cause I need it get by. If you have a problem with that, you should buy a boyfriend. Seems you have the money for it anyway."

Hyunjin grinned, wrapping a hand around Felix's wrist. "Damn Kitty, don't take it so seriously. And yeah, I'll double the pay- if you do well.. maybe I'll even pay more. Impress me and we'll see."

Felix frowned, letting himself be dragged to Hyunjin's car, looking around to make sure no one else noticed the two- as they weren't quite friends either, and he didn't want anyone to suspect anything strange going on- before turning to Hyunjin.

"Hyunjin?"

"Yes?"

"You won't tell anyone I do this, will you?" Felix bit his lip nervously.

"Hm, I don't think so. I understand you need it to get by, and I respect it. You gotta do what you gotta do- that's none of my business. Besides, if I told someone you did this as a job, I think everyone else would realize there's only one way for me to know. I don't think I'd want people to talk about you and I sleeping together if I were the asshole to reveal you were a prost-"

"Sh!" Felix shushed Hyunjin, smiling as a girl passed by. "You can't say that here.."

"My apologies," Hyunjin smiled crookedly. "As I was saying- if I were to tell everyone about this, I wouldn't have hired you to begin with. Then I'd be exposing myself as well. Anyway, enough of that- I won't tell anyone."

Felix smiled a small smile, "Thank you," 

Hyunjin nodded, opening the car door for Felix. Felix slid in the seat, immediately getting hit by the familiar sent of that rich cologne Hyunjin wore the first time they met. It generally just smelled expensive in the car. Like money.

He buckled his seat belt as Hyunjin went in behind the wheel, starting the car.

It hummed beneath him, Hyunjin quickly driving out the parking lot- making his way home. It would likely be a- maybe 20 minute drive?

Felix stared out the window, bag on his lap as he watched the buildings and trees swoosh by. "Don't you think you're throwing money around a little carelessly?" Felix asked, gaze still fixated out the window.

Hyunjin seemed to think for a second- then replied, "No. I think it's fine- especially when it's used on things like this- cuties like you."

Felix cringed a bit at the name, "Where are you getting the money from? Parents?"

Hyunjin chuckled, "Yeah, mainly. My grandparents inheritance as well. They have a pretty big family business."

Felix bit the inside of his cheek. "That's great. Are you gonna take over the company when you're old enough, then?" Hyunjin stopped at a red light. "It's not quite the dream for me, but it's fine. I'm rather passionate about art, but it can always be a hobby rather than a job."

"Huh.. Well if it earns a lot, then I'd take it." Felix sighed, crossing a leg over the other. "What company is it?" 

Hyunjin raised an eyebrow, "I didn't hire you to interrogate me or ask about my personal life."

Felix bit the inside of his cheek, fighting the urge to roll his eyes. "Okay.. whatever," 

The rest of the drive there was rather quiet, but not quite awkward. 

When they got home to Hyunjin though- it did turn awkward. At least for Felix.

He pursed his lips as he watched the numbers of the elevator go up. 1,2,3-12,13- it kept going until they eventually stopped.

Felix swallowed nervously.

Hyunjin once again dragged him by his wrist to his apartment, opening the door and shoving Felix inside. Felix held his bag between his hand, slowly toeing his shoes off. "Just throw your bag wherever you want."

Felix did, carefully placing it on the ground and barely managing to get his second shoe off before Hyunjin continued through the home.

It was all so familiar, the expensive furniture and marble everywhere. 

Hyunjin threw his keys on the kitchen counter, looking over his shoulder for Felix. 

Felix hurried beside him, letting himself be dragged through the familiar hallways to Hyunjin's bedroom. Surprisingly, he remembered the room a little too well. He normally erased all memories after those nights- but oh well.

Hyunjin kicked the door shut before pushing Felix against it, pressing his own body against Felix's, completely trapping Felix between the door and him. Felix's breath hitched- unsuspecting, eyes wide, locked onto Hyunjin's.

"Nervous, Kitty?" Hyunjin smirked, eyes roaming Felix's body. "No.." Felix whispered- voice betraying him by sounding so small and quiet. "It's okay, we'll go like last time. Do you remember it?" 

Felix searched his mind- letting images of Hyunjin hovering over him resurface in his mind, making him blush involuntarily. "Not fully.." 

Hyunjin smiled, pressing his knee up between Felix's legs. "That's alright. I'll help you remember." He leaned closer, pressing a soft kiss to Felix's lips. Felix sighed into it, appreciating the soft plushness against his lips. 

Soft and warm.

Hyunjin kissed him slowly, softly, almost lovingly, only deepening the kiss when he felt Felix relax further. His hands stayed firm on Felix's hips, thumbs brushing small, comforting circles against the hem of his shirt, knee still pressing between his legs.

"Should we get you more comfortable?" Hyunjin asked against his lips, only smiling when Felix nodded- though hesitantly. 

He moved Felix towards the bed, pulling his shirt off first before laying him down, hovering over him. "So pretty," Hyunjin complimented, making Felix blush. He didn't know why he reacted like this- but perhaps he'd always just been open to praise, whereas his other clients did everything but praise or compliment him. 

Hyunjin was just different than the 40 year olds. It made his chest heat up, hands tremble a bit by his sides. 

Hyunjin went back to his lips, kissing him again, just as soft and gentle as before, Felix's hands slowly making their way to Hyunjin's shoulders, lying there comfortably. He felt Hyunjin unbutton and zip down his fly before wrapping a hand around Felix's waist again, the other hand holding him up so he wouldn't completely crush the smaller beneath him.

Felix just let Hyunjin kiss him a little longer before he felt him pull off, instead pressing a soft kiss to his cheek- then his jaw, below his ear, all the way down his neck. He sucked on the skin a little, licking over the spot, moving to the other side, conveniently finding his sweet spot once again, making Felix shudder a bit.

Hyunjin smirked, biting down on the spot, getting a little whine out of Felix.

"Just to be sure, you don't have any preferences when it comes to this, right?" Hyunjin asked, hand feeling up Felix's torso. Felix shook his head, "No, I can take most stuff.. as long as it doesn't cause any permanent harm."

"Alright. I'll go soft though, don't worry." Hyunjin smiled, finger pinching Felix's nipple. 

Felix's back arched at that- unsuspecting, a little moan escaping his lips. Hyunjin chuckled lowly, leaning down to catch the sound in another kiss.

"So sensitive today," Hyunjin murmured against his mouth, fingers teasing over the bud again, making Felix squirm underneath him.

Felix's hands gripped Hyunjin's shoulders tighter, nails digging into the fabric of his shirt. Hyunjin kissed him slow and deep, swallowing every shaky breath Felix gave him. "Relax, Kitty," Hyunjin whispered, dragging his mouth down Felix's chest- leaving slow, open-mouthed kisses over his skin- taking his time like he was savoring him.

Felix shivered, his jeans getting tugged further down until Hyunjin had them off completely- leaving him bare beneath him. He felt exposed, a little embarrassed, but Hyunjin just looked at him like he was the most beautiful thing he'd ever seen. It was fine, they'd done this before..

Hyunjin brushed his fingers up Felix's thigh, featherlight- watching the way Felix's body reacted to even the smallest touch.

"Pretty all over," Hyunjin smirked, dipping his head to mouth at Felix's hipbone, leaving a soft mark there too.

Felix whimpered, his hips shifting restlessly- not used to being treated so carefully- like he was something precious instead of something to use and toss away.

Hyunjin kissed along the inside of his thighs, slow and unhurried, the warmth of his mouth almost making Felix feel dizzy.

"You're doing so good," Hyunjin said, voice low and sweet- fingers ghosting closer to where Felix needed him most.

Felix let out a shaky breath, nodding weakly- brain foggy under the soft treatment.

Hyunjin finally wrapped a hand around his cock, squeezing gently, just enough to make Felix gasp and buck his hips up. "Easy," Hyunjin soothed- pressing his other hand flat on Felix's stomach to keep him down. "Just relax, I'll do all the work."

Felix whined softly, hands fisting the sheets now, complying.

Hyunjin stroked him slowly- leisurely- thumb teasing over the tip every few passes- drawing quiet, desperate sounds from Felix.

"You're so sweet like this, so cute." Hyunjin murmured, kissing up his stomach, sucking little bruises into his skin as he went.

Felix couldn't stop the way his legs trembled, his whole body tingling under Hyunjin's careful touches- nothing rushed, nothing rough- just slow, patient pleasure. It was so different but so good.

When Hyunjin finally moved back up to kiss him again, Felix clung to him- needy- lips parting easily for him.

Hyunjin smiled against his mouth, guiding his legs apart with a hand on his thigh- "Gonna make you feel even better, Kitty."

Felix could only nod- trusting him completely. Honestly- at this point he'd gotten crazy horny as well. He wanted this- not just for the money, but for Hyun- no- for the orgasm. He needed it.

Hyunjin stripped himself to only his boxers, grabbing something from his bedside drawer, and sitting back between Felix's legs. He spread them further apart upon seeing the younger attempt to close them, conveniently placing his knee in a position where Felix couldn't move his leg.

Felix blushed, looking at what Hyunjin had in his hand. Oh, lubricant. Of course.

He popped the lid open, squirting a generous amount onto two of his fingers, moving them down to Felix entrance. 

Slowly, he rubbed the rim, pushing his pointer in first, just slow, letting Felix get accustomed to the feeling before slowly dragging it back out. He repeated the motion a couple times before feeling the glide grow easier.

When it did, he gave it a minute more before pulling his finger out, adding his middle finger beside it, pushing them back in. 

It was a little tighter this time, but Hyunjin managed to get both fingers fully in, lightly curling them to press against the younger's sweet spot. The younger let out a moan at that, slightly arching his back and pushing his hips back down to meet Hyunjin's fingers.

"Yeah, did I find it?" Hyunjin smirked, repeating the action a couple times before thrusting his fingers back in and out. Felix's mouth hung open, before realizing and biting his bottom lip. "Don't bother," Hyunjin said, adding a third finger, the stretch making Felix frown. "I like hearing your sounds. Besides, biting your lips isn't good."

Felix let go of his lip at that, instead pursing them. Hyunjin's fingers were rather long, longer than his other clients and his own, (even longer than some of his clients dicks) so it felt really, really good. Especially 'cause he was so gentle with them. With him.

He let out a quiet moan, attempting to look down at Hyunjin's fingers, throwing his head back when he failed. 

Instead he just shut his eyes, reveling in the feeling.

Hyunjin kept thrusting the three fingers in and out, gradually picking up pace as he occasionally hit Felix's prostate dead on. Felix always shifted a bit whenever he did, moaning, sometimes louder and sometimes more desperate.

Right as he was close he could feel Hyunjin's movements slow down before lulling to a stop, pulling his fingers out. Felix whined at the sudden empty feeling inside him. Hyunjin smirked, placing a kiss on Felix's lips to muffle his whines.

"Don't worry, you'll be full again in a moment," he said, getting off the bed for a second to pull his briefs down. When he did, he returned between Felix's legs, grabbing the lube again to spread around his cock.

He squirted the remaining amount on, making a mental note to purchase more another day.

He stroked himself for a minute or so, feeling his hardened member ready and lining himself up to Felix's hole. Felix looked awestruck staring at him getting closer, feeling his heartbeat quicken for no reason.

They'd done this before- why did it have to be different this time? 

He sucked in a breath, squeezing his lips shut as he felt Hyunjin circle his rim with his tip a couple times. He exhaled shakily through his nose, hands finding the sheets, just to ground himself- in case it became unbearable. 

"Ready?" Hyunjin asked, and Felix barely caught it- too focused on Hyunjin's cock. "Yeah," 

Hyunjin smiled, pushing his tip in. Despite prepping Felix, he still felt really tight, squeezing his cock. "Relax, Kitty. I won't go hard." Hyunjin shot a glance at Felix, chuckling at his flustered expression. 

"Unless you want me to," he added, catching a moment where Felix was caught of guard, pushing further in. Felix made a sound somewhere between a hiss and groan at that, feeling Hyunjin's member twitch against his prostate, moaning.

"You sound so sweet," Hyunjin groaned, pushing all the way in, feeling his hips collide with Felix's ass. He groaned deeply at that. "Fuck.."

Felix blushed a bit at that. Honestly, he sounded pretty hot.. He brushed the thought aside, trying to breathe through the stretch, the fullness sending goosebumps down his arms which now moved to hold around Hyunjin's biceps. He wasn't quite sure if it was Hyunjin's cock or the way he looked at him- almost as if he wanted to eat him- that made him feel so intense, but it was so hot. So hot how Hyunjin looked at him and treated him as if he were more than just a body- a quick fuck- but like something he actually cared about- something he wanted to.. memorize?

That didn't even make sense. If he wanted to memorize Felix like this under him- he could surely buy more nights with him. Heck, he could buy Felix for a whole year- no doubt.

Hyunjin didn't move at first, just stayed to let Felix adjust around him- adjust to the size. Felix's small hands squeezed his biceps, looking up at him shyly. "You okay?" Hyunjin asked, voice lower now. Felix nodded, cheeks flushed.

"Yeah... you- I just.. You feel big."

Hyunjin smirked, leaning down to kiss his lips. "That's cause you're so tight, Kitty. Can't help but feel everything."

He pulled back enough just to start a rhythm, pulling halfway out to thrust back in. Pulling out to the tip, thrusting back in again. He then rolled his hips around a little, accidentally grazing Felix's prostate again. 

Felix let out a low moan. He could feel every drag out, every slide back in- the angles, the friction- it was all so good.

Hyunjin picked up a little pace again, angling his hips just right to hit that spot again. When he did, Felix back arched beautifully, a needy moan spilling from his lips. "There," Hyunjin smirked, "Right there, huh?" 

Hyunjin's hands moved to hold around Felix's hips instead, pulling him down to meet his thrusts halfway, making Felix's hands fall beside his head, gripping the sheets tightly as his eyes rolled back.

"Oh fuck-" he moaned, shutting his eyes, focusing on the feeling. "That's good.. it feels good, Hyunjin."

Hyunjin smiled, fighting back a moan himself as he replied, "That's good. I'll make you feel better than ever."

Felix couldn't help clench a little when Hyunjin said that- nodding, thought he didn't know what he was nodding for. He wasn't really listening, just concentrating on the pleasurable feelings.

He suddenly felt another nip at his nipple, rolling the bud between two of Hyunjin's fingers, tugging and pulling a bit at that. Felix whined, turning his head to the side. Hyunjin did in fact know how to please him well..

"Oh god.." Felix moaned, opening his eyes again to focus on something- anything. 

He felt tears form in his eyes, hot and wet, and he looked back up to try and keep them from falling. "You feel so deep inside, Hyunjin.." he cried out, meeting eyes with the older.

Hyunjin smirked, taking the hand previously playing with a nipple to feel up Felix's stomach. He moved it around a bit, searching for something. He then grinned widely, taking one of Felix's hands into his own, savoring the soft feeling of it.

He placed it on his lower stomach, pressing down on it for Felix to feel. Felix felt something hot and wet roll down his cheek when he felt it. "Fuck- Hyunjin.. is that.."

"That's my cock, sweetie. Can you feel it? So deep inside you.." he grunted, speeding up his thrusts, going a little harder so Felix could really feel it. Felix nodded, sobbing as Hyunjin intertwined their fingers and pinned his hand to the bed, doing the same with his other hand, almost full-on laying on him, being able to hit his prostate better in that position.

Felix wanted to move his hand- but he couldn't. He needed to feel something- hold onto something to ground himself, but he had nothing- making it all feel so much more intense.

He sobbed, feeling tears stream down his face, his cries being muffled by Hyunjin's lips, passionately kissing into his mouth, tongue pressing against Felix's, tasting him.

Felix let him- well.. he should let Hyunjin do whatever- as he's his client- but it was almost as if he wanted Hyunjin to do it. Like he didn't mind even if Hyunjin wasn't a client. 

"So sweet," Hyunjin said against his lips. "Obedient little Kitty." Felix blushed at that, shutting his eyes tightly as Hyunjin continued kissing him again- almost possesively. It send a shiver up Felix's spine.

Hyunjin started hitting Felix's prostate continuously with each thrust- naturally making Felix moan into his mouth, gasping for air when Hyunjin didn't pull off, whining even more at that.

He felt a small knot form in his lower stomach, clenching harder around Hyunjin, wanting to come so bad.

"God- Hyunjin.. I'm close.." he whimpered, feeling Hyunjin kiss his jaw again. "Making my kitten feel good?"

Felix blushed, turning his head- stupidly giving Hyunjin access to his neck instead. Hyunjin licked a stripe up his neck, kissing the spot he ended at, sucking the skin into his mouth and leaving a convenient mark right there- below his ear.

Felix's breathing quickened, growing more rapid by the second as the knot in his stomach tightened as well. "Fuck.. Hyunjin- don't leave too many marks."

"Why not?" Hyunjin asked, sucking on the skin right in the middle of his throat. "I can't cover them all.." he muttered, glossy eyes staring at the ceiling. Hyunjin pulled off of him for a second to meet his gaze. "Why cover them?"

"I can't walk around campus covered in hickeys.. I need to cover them with my makeup.."

"But I don't want you to cover them." Hyunjin said, eyes narrowing as he pressed a kiss to the corner of his lips. Felix bit back a moan. "Hyunjin.."

Hyunjin straightened himself up, pulling Felix down by the hips to harshly slam back into him, fucking him closer to his orgasm. "Oh goodness.." Felix moaned, eyes furrowing as he felt himself near the edge.

"You're doing so good, Kitty. So good for me. You're close, yeah?"

Felix nodded, mouth hung open, taking desperate breaths as he felt himself about to cum. 

"Good. Come for me, Sweetheart." Hyunjin grunted, thrusting a couple times more before Felix released- letting out a desperate moan as his eyes shut, hands tightly fisting the sheets to help bare the pleasure, covering his own stomach with his release.

He could hear Hyunjin groaning, his thrusts turning slobbier as he buried himself deep inside Felix, painting him with his release. Felix could feel the heat inside him, twitching a bit from oversensitivity as he admired Hyunjin's pleasured face despite not being fully recovered from his own orgasm yet.

"Fuck.." Hyunjin muttered, riding out their orgasms with a couple rolls of his hips before pulling out, admiring the way his cum trickled out of Felix's hole. "You did so good, Felix. You felt so good."

Felix blushed, recovering from his flushed state to sit up. He was still breathing a little heavily, looking as Hyunjin searched his drawers for some wipes.

He pulled out a packet of wet wipes, cleaning himself up before helping Felix.

Felix said he could do it himself, but Hyunjin insisted- demanded- he did it, so, he let him. 

It felt a little odd.. maybe because he always had to do it himself? Maybe because it felt so intimate? Well, that didn't make sense seeing as they just.. well, fucked. Maybe it was just because he knew he'd see Hyunjin again after this.

"There you go," Hyunjin smiled, discarding of the wipes. "Do you want a shower as well? I have spare towels and cloth-"

"No thank you, I'll do it when I get home." Felix smiled, getting up despite the slight sting in his lower body. Hyunjin seemed to notice his cringing expression, fighting back a smirk. "You sure? A hot shower can help with.. pain and tension. I have drinks as well."

"Thank you, but I'm sure. I'll shower better at home, thanks for the offer though." he said, putting his clothes back on. Yuck, the clothes he'd been wearing to school. It felt wrong wearing previously worn clothes after being naked. Felt like he should've taken Hyunjin up on the offer of getting some spare clothes to borrow.

But that would've meant he had to return in sometime, and he didn't want that. He wanted to limit their interactions.

"Okay," Hyunjin said, finding a towel to wrap around his own hips. "Do you need a drive back home?"

"No I'm fine, thanks." Felix slid his shirt over his head, lazily buttoning his pants. "You sure? Do you live far?"

Felix smiled, "I appreciate your concern, but I got home safely the first time we did this. I don't live.. too far, so I'll manage."

Hyunjin nodded, eyes narrowing a little, eyeing Felix's neck. "Right, you need your pay." he muttered, walking back out to the kitchen. He searched through some bills, pulling out the amount he promised Felix. "Do you want a little extra?" he asked, looking at Felix.

Was that even a question? Of course he did.

But.. the offer felt a little odd. He cocked an eyebrow. "Under what circumstance?" 

Hyunjin threw in a 100.000 bill. "Don't cover your hickeys with that silly makeup of yours.. then this- it's all yours.

Felix looked dumbfounded, frowning. "Why though?.. I don't want everyone to know I've.. done something."

Hyunjin smiled, "Do you want it?" 

Felix sighed, considering for a second if it was a good idea or not. Eventually, he decided on just taking it, grabbing the money from his hands. "Fine. No makeup." he said, heading towards the entrance to put his shoes on, swinging his bag over his shoulder and shoving the money in his wallet.

Hyunjin looked satisfied, eyeing him the whole time until he left. "I'll see you around, Kitty." 

Felix rolled his eyes when Hyunjin couldn't see. "Yep, bye." he said, shutting the door behind him.

Well, maybe he couldn't use makeup to cover his hickeys- but- he had a couple scarfs and turtlenecks he could wear instead.

Hyunjin wouldn't care- would he?

No, he just said 'no makeup'.

He should've been more specific if he really didn't want Felix to cover them.

Chapter Text

Felix shut the door of his room, dropping his bag on the floor, ultimately doing the same himself, just laying down on the cold hard floor. It was so hot out today, and he was exhausted- besides, he'd shower afterwards anyway, so it didn't matter if he or his clothes got dirty. He wouldn't want his dirty self to lay in bed now anyway, so floor it was.

He sighed, shutting his eyes. He should do this more often. 

Then he groaned, pushing himself up, practically crawling to his closet to find some clean clothes to change into. Then, he crawled to his and Seungmin's shared bathroom, locking the door and turning the shower to the coldest setting possible.

He would soon regret that though. Okay, maybe it was comfortable to lie on a cold floor, but showering in freezing water wasn't so pleasurable. It almost hurt from how cold it was.

Screw that, instead he turned it to a warm setting. Not boiling like usual, but rather somewhere in between. 

He washed himself up, roughly drying his hair when he saw his own reflection. Shit, that fucking idiot left marks everywhere.

Well- not everywhere, but at least five different spots on his neck, and his inner thighs as well. Jeez.

Well, he'd just have to hope his shirt could cover the hickeys further up his body, or else he'd have to use a scarf which he didn't mind, but would prefer not to wear as they flew all over the place.

He applied some cream on the spots, putting some shorts and a tee on afterwards. He shared a dorm with Seungmin- who, speaking of, where was he?- and he couldn’t care less if he walked around covered in marks. He probably wouldn't even care if Felix had sex while he was in the apartment. Huh.

He didn't wanna try though, as that was just humiliating for him. 

He threw his clothes in the wash, starting the machine and going to find something to eat. It was around dinner time now, and he was starting to starve a bit. 

Ultimately deciding on some noodles, he started heating the water, searching every drawer in the kitchen while waiting for the water to start boiling. He found a packet of chips in one of the drawers- huh, didn't know about that.

It was just something he did every time he was making noodles- specifically while waiting for the water to boil- sometimes even reading all the ingredients just for time to pass. He could never understand what any of them were though. That probably wasn't a good thing- but they tasted good and were affordable, so oh well.

Shoving the noodles in the water, he heard the front door open, glancing at Seungmin who came in with Changbin. "Oh hey, Lix. I wasn't sure if you were home or not," Seungmin smiled, kicking his shoes off. Felix smiled. "Hey you two, have you had dinner yet?"

"No, we were gonna order a pizza or two.. only because Changbin eats one and a half by himself." 

Changbin frowned, "So what if I do? With all these muscles, I need to, unlike you who is pure bones. Makes sense you only need to eat a slice or two MAX."

"Man fuck off, I'm not pure bones. Even if I was, it'd be 'cause you took all my meat."

"Oh I think I'd prefer you taking my meat." Changbin sneered, and all Felix heard afterwards was a loud slap, followed by a scolding from Seungmin.

These idiots.

He stirred his noodles around, watching as the two others sat on the couch, fighting for the remote. 

"Felix," Changbin called out. "Who should pick which movie to watch? Sweet Changbin, or.. him?"

Felix chuckled. "Well Seungmin, I think you should let your guest choose. He might not have a television at home himself."

Changbin grinned, pulling the remote from Seungmin's hands.

"Wow, Felix. I was gonna ask you to join, but I'm taking that back now. It's my money paying for this shit anyway.. whatever, I'll pick the next movie then." Seungmin mumbled, crossing his arms.

Changbin put on a movie he knew Seungmin hated, probably to piss him off first, before picking one they were both fine with. 

How can they stand each other..

"No, Felix, I was just joking. You can join us if you want, and we can all order food together." Seungmin said, watching Felix sit at the dining table, eating by himself.

"I'm good, thank you though. I'm just gonna eat and head to read a little in my room." Felix smiled, glancing at the tv every once in a while when eating. He had avoided putting the whole spice pack in, in fear of crying or burning up in flames at the spice. He didn't have the best tolerance.

When he finished, he threw his plate in the dishwasher, heading to his bedroom. He threw himself on the bed, just laying a bit in silence before grabbing a random book.

He flipped to the page his bookmark sat at, lazily reading a little through it. He should buy a new book. He's already read this one twice before- or had it been three times? Whatever, he should get a new one. He was just worried he'd never find a book as good as this one, so he never bothered.

Besides, most of his expenses went to rent and his tuition anyway, the little remaining he had going to his savings or outfits to.. well.. seduce men. 

It's not that he couldn't afford a 15000 won book, but did he need a new book? No. Could he survive without a new one? Yes. So there the decision was made. He'd save the money instead.

Besides, his birthday was coming up in a month, so he could wish for a book or two from his friends instead. 

He never asked for too much from them. He didn't want to use them, and he could survive without them.

Well thinking about it, he didn't have all the time in the world to spend doing his own shenanigans anyway. He worked anywhere from 15-20 hours a week, also spending around 10 hours searching for clients, along with school, sleep, he could definitely survive without entertainment for himself. 

Besides on weekends, if he didn't have a shift, he'd often find something else to do, such as going out with Seungmin or Jisung. He rarely even turned to his books- that was only if he needed some quiet time for himself or an excuse to just be alone.

He rarely read in them- yet he'd reread it several times by now. Where did he get the time from? He couldn't even remember when he last read in it. Many days had just turned into blurs, him barely remembering them.

He felt like he'd gotten some sort of memory loss condition, because he couldn't remember anything if he really thought about it. When was it that he slept with Hyunjin for the first time.. was it two or three- four weeks ago? He couldn't remember. Just that he sat at that table in the club.

He sighed, remembering the money still in his wallet. He attempting reaching his bag from the bed, not being able to and just crawling to it instead, fishing out his wallet.

He sat crisscrossed on the floor, counting the bills Hyunjin gave him.

Yeah.. this could probably pay his rent for two months if he just avoided spending too much at bars or on useless stuff. 

He put the money aside, making a mental note to exchange it at the bank someday, transfer it to his account.

…

Next day, Friday, he practically fell asleep in the cafeteria during lunch. God, he'd slept 9 hours, but it somehow wasn't enough. He and his friends sat on the table near the wall, and Felix leaned against that wall, shutting his eyes, not to sleep, but rather to try and get rid of this tiredness threatening to take him to dreamland.

"Ugh, this day is going by so slow." Jisung whined, poking at his pasta. "You don't say," Seungmin giggled. "Felix over here is practically falling asleep." 

"I don't know why I'm so tired honestly.. I slept a lot last night. I think it's just the boring lectures getting to me. Damn, it's been a week of school, and I'm already dying."

"No I totally get you," Seungmin said, taking a bite of his food. "Why does anyone need to take a math class for 4 hours straight?"

"Hah," Changbin snorted. "At least it's on a Friday rather a Monday. Think about the amazing weekend- 's just around the corner."

"That is true- but still.. four hours.." Seungmin huffed, defeated.

"Yeah.. I still think Friday should count as a weekend. School and- everything, to be honest- would be so much nicer with four weekdays and three days of weekend." Jisung smiled cheekily, sipping from his coffee.

Felix sat up, leaning his head in his palm. "No because I swear on everything, when I was younger I had three days of weekends back when I was in kindergarten. Heck I miss life back then. All you had to do was chase your friends around the playground- and your biggest struggles were coloring inside the lines, and everyone’s biggest fears were showers and going to sleep. God, now those are the best parts of my day. I love sleep and showers.. hot ones.." Felix shut his eyes, mumbling the last part. 

"Don't fall asleep on us now, Lix. Don't you only have one class after this anyway?" 

"Huh.. yeah. Today is a short day for me. Well, could be shorter, but ends at half-past one."

"Good for you. I have to stay till four. So annoying." Changbin whined, dropping his head between his hands. 

Felix giggled, noticing Jeongin approach him. He waved at him, scooting over to make space for him to sit as well.

Jeongin smiled. "Hey Felix, hey you guys." his eyes practically disappeared when smiling. It was so adorable oh god. "Hey Jeongin. Haven't seen you in a while." Felix smiled- had it been a day or three? God, he was so screwed, why couldn't he even remember. It was like what he said earlier- all days are blurring together.

"Yeah well, I was seeing what class you have after this. I feel like we talked about our shared classes- though I can't remember." He took a seat beside him.

"Oh, I have art class next. It's a short class, I'm off afterwards." 

"Ah great, me too. We should find the place together- I honestly have no idea where it is- I'll need your help."

Felix giggled, "Don't rely on me to find it. I can't navigate these buildings."

Jeongin clicked his tongue. "Fair enough, you know. At least if we get lost, we're together. It's easier to face the embarrassment if you're not alone."

"Yeah, you're right about that." Felix chuckled, lightly tugging at the scarf around his neck. It was fucking itchy, made of some thin material- which was on purpose- as it was summer and he couldn't wear a thick one around- but why did he pick this one. It was so uncomfortably scratchy.

"Oh I like your scarf." Jeongin said, lightly touching the end of it. "It's blue.. or is it green?" He chuckled, observing it closer. "I'd say mint green." Felix smiled, now also looking at his scarf. "You look like a fashion student like that." Jeongin smiled, looking Felix in the eyes again.

"Because I'm wearing a scarf?"

"Well, it's fashionable. In the way art students or fashion students dress." 

Felix smiled, "I'm not doing it to look like a fashion student."

"Oh, then why?" Jeongin smiled, moving his eyes back to the scarf, then scanning his whole outfit.

Luckily, Felix didn't have to answer as Jeongin spoke again. He just hoped he wouldn't notice the flushed expression on his face- reminding him, he hadn't seen Hyunjin all day. That was rather good, because then he could use the weekend to get rid of the hickeys- as they weren't so dark- and hopefully have them gone by Monday again.

"Felix you look like mint chocolate chip ice cream." Jeongin laughed, Jisung gasping in agreement, "That's exactly what I said!" Well, in all fairness, Felix was wearing a mint green scarf  and a white shirt and brown pants. It could resemble mint chocolate in some way.

"Yeah so edible.." Seungmin smirked, "If you were ice cream I'd eat you." 

Felix lightly hit Seungmin. "Oh shut up." 

Seungmin giggled, then went to whisper in his ear, "You're right, I'd eat you whether you were ice cream or not."

Felix blushed, getting up. "Stop- I'm leaving- you are all too much- I swear." 

They all teased him- well except Jeongin, who followed him away. Felix shoved his lunch tray away, feeling Jeongin wrap a arm around him. "You know Felix, I have another friend of mine in art class as well."

"Oh, cool." Felix smiled. "We can all find a table and sit together then."

Fuck. His. Fucking. Life.

The only thing between Felix and Hyunjin was a clueless little Jeongin, eagerly listening to what the art teacher was saying while Felix was so interested in everything but what was to his left for no reason.

Well there was a reason. If he turned to his left, he was sure Hyunjin- whom was resting his chin in the palm of his hand, occasionally shooting glances at Felix- would say something to him, so he avoided that at all costs.

God, he'd seen Jeongin with Hyunjin earlier on in the week in the cafeteria- but that wasn't the type of shit- or, he means, stuff- his mind remembered. 

Fuck my life, fuck my life, God- if you're real, you may kill me right now. Well, maybe not kill, but teleport me home. Make me invisible for the next hour or two please. Lord, ple-

"Felix? Can you hear me?" Jeongin chuckled, waving a hand in front of his face. "Oh!" Felix exclaimed, smiling crookedly at Jeongin. "Sorry- I'm just admiring the art work over there." Felix scratched the back of his neck, pressing his lips together, trying to hide his flushed face.

Jeongin was quiet while he stared at the artwork behind Felix, then awkwardly said: "Oh, I didn't know you were into.. nude art? Anatomy?"

What?!

He shot a glance behind him. "Oh.. yes- I just.. recently.. I've been studying it a bit- I mean I just find it impressive how people can draw like that- it's very interesting.. yeah." 

Jeongin nodded, smiling strangely at Felix, almost as if he didn't believe him. Well why would he believe him? He was lying but- whatever.

"Well Hyunjin he's very good at art. He could probably give you some pointers." Jeongin smiled, moving a little back in his chair so Felix could see Hyunjin.

"Ah- okay.." Felix nodded, tapping his fingers against the table. 

"I can give you some pointers if you want, Felix. I could also help you if you want to try.. anatomy art." Hyunjin said, straight face. 

Felix nodded, "Yes- thank you. I'm fine though- YouTube tutorials are enough-"

"Oh din't worry!" Jeongin smiled. "Hyunjin is very trustworthy. He had a nice home too- you should see. Just lay him a visit at some point- here, give me your phone Lix."

"For what reason?" Felix hesitated, pulling out his phone from his back pocket, but before Jeongin answered, he pulled it from his hands. "I'll give you Hyunjin's number. He's- I mean- GREAT at art, really. You should visit him someday."

"Oh no Jeongin I'm perfectly.. fine." Felix sighed, seeing Hyunjin's small smirk when his own phone rang. "Don't worry, Felix. I can help you with it one day. Trust me."

"Oh.. Okay- I'll see if I have the time or.. anything."

"Great." Jeongin smiled, handing Felix his own phone back. He just let it be on the table, defeated. 

He shot a awkward glance at Hyunjin when he felt him staring. "I like your scarf." 

"Oh.. thank you." Felix felt Hyunjin’s eyes narrow. "Isn't it hot in this weather, though?"

Felix knew what Hyunjin meant. "No it's not." I won't take it off.

He'd kept his promise- no makeup underneath- so no chance he was throwing it.

"Huh.. what's it made of?" He reached out, lightly feeling the material beneath his fingers. "I.. am not sure," Felix pulled away, fixing how the scarf sat, shaking his head to get rid of the redness staining his cheeks.

"Hm," Hyunjin hummed. Felix was quick to start again, though. "So what are we supposed to do?" 

Jeongin chuckled, "Were you so busy staring at those drawings you didn't even hear what the teacher said?" 

Felix's blush told Jeongin everything he needed to know. "Alright, we just have to try out different methods in shading- sketching and whatever. I'm gonna draw a apple, I think that's easy to sketch and shade. What about you two?"

Felix puckered his lips, thinking. "I'll just do a butterfly or.. flower." 

Hyunjin smiled. "Cute. I think I'll draw a little kitten." 

Felix felt Hyunjin's eyes bore holes into his skin, feeling goosebumps rise at the way Hyunjin said 'kitten'.

Oh lord..

He found some paper under the table, along with some build-in racks with pencils and paint. He grabbed a little handful paper- in case they needed to start completely over- and some pencils, and a eraser. 

He drew a easy simple sketch. He was never really good at drawing, but once at 12 he found a tutorial on YouTube showing how to draw a realistic butterfly- and it'd stuck with him since. Well, it wasn't the most realistic, but it looked pretty darn good- at least it did in Felix's opinion. Then the flower he drew wasn't as elegant, but it was still fine.

"Wow, your butterfly is good, Lix. How did you do that?"

Felix giggled, "Thank you- and it was just muscle memory I guess. Butterflies are the only thing I can draw well, and I've done so my whole life, so.."

Jeongin nodded, "Well, it looks great. Doesn't it, Hyunjin?"

"Yeah. It's good," Hyunjin smiled, though it didn't reach his eyes. Whatever, he didn't care about Hyunjin's stupid opinion anyway.

"Woah! Hyunjin! Your cat- kitty- whatever- it's so good!"

Hyunjin grinned, wrapping a arm around Jeongin's shoulder, finger momentarily grazing Felix. "Thank you Sweetheart."

Felix looked at the two at that. He remembered Hyunjin calling him that. It was probably something he did everyone.

"I mean it's really good! It looks like a photograph! Damn.." Jeongin looked so amazed- and Felix couldn't lie, it looked great.

"Yeah well, I have good memory when it comes to this stuff." Hyunjin smiled.

"Woah like photographic memory?" Jeongin asked.

Hyunjin hummed, "Yeah I guess you could say so," he glanced at Felix. "I can remember things pretty well.."

Felix's eyes narrowed and he looked away. Obviously Hyunjin was trying to tick him off or tease him. He wasn't gonna let him do that.

Instead, he returned to his butterfly, suddenly finding it ugly compared to Hyunjin's. Dang, the only thing he was good at drawing wasn't really that good after all..

He bit his lip and tried shading it. He wasn't a professional, but he kind of knew how to do it, roughly adding darker lines fading out at some parts. 

"My apple looks shit compared to you guys'.. I'm sad."

"No, it looks great!" Felix glanced at Jeongin's apple- and.. it wasn't that bad..

"Hyunjin.. what do you think?" Jeongin frowned. "No I think it's good. I mean I can clearly tell it's a apple and not a.. pear or something,"

"Huh.. well, let me color it in, maybe it'll look better then." Jeongin said, searching for some colored pencils. "Don't they have colored pens here..?" 

"They're over there- by the back." Hyunjin said, pointing somewhere behind him without looking. "Oh I see them, thanks." Jeongin said, sliding off his chair, walking away.

Felix continued shading, turning the paper to write the date on the back. The nineteenth of Aug-

He felt a finger poke his thigh. He didn't move his head, just glanced at Hyunjin from the side. "What?"

"You're wearing a scarf. I thought I told you not to cover them up."

"You told me not to use makeup." Felix said, resuming to writing the date.

"Well this- you're still covering them." 

Felix shrugged. "Should've been more specific about it then." 

He could see the way Hyunjin's jaw clenched from his peripheral vision. "Felix I paid you extra to not cover them up. You didn't listen."

"You paid me not to use makeup." Felix fought the urge to roll his eyes. "Besides, what's done is done anyway.. I won't wear a scarf Monday- alright? Just be more clear about what you want next time."

Hyunjin sighed. "Felix, you didn't do as I wanted. Don't you get paid to do as your clients want? I swear if I get my time with you again- I'll fu-"

"They have like a hundred different shades of each color you guys!" Jeongin said, sitting back down between them. "Look, I have five different reds here, and then these oranges and purples- or rather maroons look so red as well! Oh my goodness! This is so cool.. Hyunjin, this must be heaven for you."

Hyunjin bit back his words, eyes remaining on Felix. "Yeah, heaven.. Let me borrow this orange." 

"Hey I was gonna use that! Why would you make the cat orange anyway.. aren't ginger cats like crazy.."

Felix giggled a little at that, coloring his whole butterfly different shades of red and purple- just because he didn't bother getting up to grab colors himself.

… 

When class finished, he packed his stuff together, exiting the room. Oh good lord, finally weekend. He could just rest, sleep, and not worry about anything at all.

Oh but he should've known better than to jinx it. 

"Felix!" A all-too-familiar voice called out. "Jeongin, can you just wait in my car? Here, you can take my keys- I parked near the front." Hyunjin said, dropping some car keys in Jeongin's hands. "Okay, have a nice weekend, Felix! I'll see you Monday!"

"Yeah, see you!" Felix smiled, dropping it the second Hyunjin stood across from him.

"I don't find it fair you don't do what I paid you for." Hyunjin furrowed his brows. 

"You said, "don't use makeup to cover them," or something like that- and I didn't! Do you see any makeup?"

Hyunjin tilted his head, "I can't even tell- because you have a fucking big scarf covering your whole neck."

"Oh god, Hyunjin- I'll drop the scarf on Monday, alright? What's your deal with me walking around covered in hickeys anyway?"

Hyunjin smirked, "Well it just reminds me you were mine for a couple hours.. I want you to drop it."

"I'm dropping it on Monday, okay? Do I gotta repeat it again or spell it out for you? I-won't-walk-with-it-Monday, okay?" 

"Fuck.." Hyunjin scoffed, running a hand through his hair. "You're making me.. ugh. How much do you normally charge for a blowjob?" 

A student nearby froze momentarily- pulling their headphones out their ear, "What did you just say?" 

"Oh," Hyunjin laughed, "I asked how much he gets paid for his job." Well.. that was somewhat true..

"Oh, okay." She smiled, plugging her headphones back in and continuing her walk. 

Hyunjin rolled his eyes, "She almost heard you fucker!" Felix whisper-yelled, understandably worried. If anyone found out- he could lose everything- well.. except Seungmin, Jisung and Changbin. They knew.

"Well if you'd just done as I said to begin with- we wouldn't even be here." Hyunjin crossed his arms. Now, answer me."

"What? A blowjob? Like.. depends on who it is. A creepy dude could be 200.000, and hot, younger guy could be 100.000."

"So then you'd charge me 100.000?" Hyunjin asked. God, he's way too full of himself.

"No. you'd be 300.000, just because of how-"

"Deal, do you have a app where I can transfer you the money?" 

.. "What?"

"Give me a.. couple minutes of your day- right now- and I'll send over the money."

"What? Are you insane? I'm not on the job right now- I can't just-"

"You set a price of 300.000, and now you won't take it?"

"I.. well I.. I haven't prepared- so even I wanted to-"

"It's a blowjob, what do you need to prepare? Your throat? I'll be gentle."

"Well that wasn't even the issue.. I'm just not prepared."

"Have you found some guy who's paid your full tuition or what?" Hyunjin raised an eyebrow. Felix shook his head, "No- but I'm al-"

"Then why won't you take it? It's easy money.." Hyunjin muttered, sighing.

Felix bit his lip. It was easy money, but.. he was just planning on heading home. Besides, they did stuff together yesterday.. 

"Hyunjin, it's just that we did something yesterday as well.. I don't want you to think you're more than a client to me, that's all."

Hyunjin shrugged. "I won't. You'll see me as a client- who for the record, sees you as more than just a price tag, and remembers you even after- and I, I'll see you as my.. occasional canvas."

"Occasional canvas?" Felix scoffed, "What does that mean?"

"It's a little weird to explain." Hyunjin checked the time on his watch. Fuck, Felix had never seen a watch like that before. It could probably pay for his whole tuition. "I mean it'd be easier to show.. unless, you don't want some quick money?"

Felix looked dumbfounded, standing still in his spot, looking everywhere but at Hyunjin. "Well it wouldn't take long.." he muttered, more to himself than Hyunjin, but Hyunjin seemed happy about that, "Great," he said, pulling Felix away.

"Wait, Hyunjin-"

"I'll send you over the money now.. 300.000, right?" 

Felix's mouth stayed open a sliver, fucking idiot, "Yes.."

"Great, I send it over messages, you should have it."

Oh lord, what has he gotten himself into? No, he should take it- it'll just be a couple minutes, and he'll leave with a lot of money. Huh, if I did this everyday, how much money could I earn.. that'd be at least 2 million a week.

Felix shot a glance at Hyunjin. This fucker had already paid him so much like money wasn't a issue. Well, in his case it probably wasn't, so that made sense..

But Felix would never personally spend such money on a prostitute. 

"In here, I think it's safe." He pulled him into the bathrooms. "Hyunjin, many students aren't off class yet- so someone else could still walk in." Felix muttered, letting himself be dragged to the back stall.

Hyunjin locked the door, placing the sweatshirt previously wrapped around his shoulders down for Felix to kneel on. "Sit."

Felix let out a quiet whine- not on purpose- hanging his backpack on one of the hooks, slowly dropping to his knees. "And don't worry Kitty, I won't be loud. No one will hear- unless you make too much noise."

Fucking idiot. Why was he so kind and charming but so fucking annoying for no reason. Something about him just ticked Felix off, he didn't know what. 

Maybe it was just the fact he was rich. He hated spoiled people. 

But Hyunjin wasn't spoiled.. he was kind.

Yet he was fucking annoying. Besides, Seungmin was rich as well, he didn't get Felix on his nerves like Felix did.

Well maybe Felix just felt exposed, knowing someone who has seen him in such a vulnerable state also was somewhat close to him. 

He sighed, waiting for Hyunjin to prepare himself. How could you even be hard or horny when you weren't planning on doing anything dirty to begin with?

Felix suddenly felt his head being lifted by two fingers on his chin. "Felix, are you okay with this?" Hyunjin asked, undoing his belt. Felix blinked harshly, coming back to reality. "Oh- yeah I'm good." He smiled.

"Hm," Hyunjin hummed, unbuttoning his fly. "Okay, well.. tell me if you want me to stop." Hyunjin said, pulling his cock out of his briefs, chuckling. "Or, well.. tap my thigh or something. I'm not sure you'll be able to talk,"

Felix blushed, looking away, as he felt Hyunjin move his head closer to his tip, tapping it against his lips. Felix moved his eyes back to it, lord, it was really big, and pretty.

Ew, a dick couldn't be pretty.

Felix stuck out his tongue, letting it glide over his tip a couple times, feeling a couple beads of precum escape from the slit, landing on Felix's tongue. He heard Hyunjin let out a low groan, softly entangling his fingers in Felix's hair.

"So soft," he muttered, looking down at him with intense eyes. Something about them really made a shiver go up his spine.

He took the first half of him in as well as he could, tongue flattening to feel up the bottom-side of his cock, bobbing his head back and forth as well as he could. Hyunjin's low moan motivated him to go faster, hands finding Hyunjin's thighs to better support himself.

Hyunjin's grip tightened in his hair- though not pulling or hurting him, just resting there to ensure he stayed still, keeping up the work. "Very good, Kitten." Hyunjin whispered, licking his own lips while staring down at Felix. 

Felix blushed, shutting his eyes in an attempt to make his flustered face go away, focusing solely on the man in front of him- on pleasuring him.

Suddenly, the bathroom door swung open, and he heard a couple voices. "God, I needed a minute or two from her. Good thing she let us go." A voice said, and it was slightly hard to hear as there was only a small gap on the top of the stall, making all voices appear more quiet than they were.

"Yeah. I say we stay a minute or five here, then go back. I can't take more of her talking. I'm sorry, but why do I need to hear about how her cousin's friend's fiancé witnessed a murder. I mean I just don't get what that has to do with Korean class."

Felix heard a laugh- a little too familiar.. 

Wait- was this Seungmin and someone else?

"You're right, but at least we don't have to do any work." Seungmin said. 

The unknown person agreed, saying something about just skipping class altogether.

"I can't," Seungmin said, seemingly focused on something else. "I have nothing else to do after this anyway, so I'd just be bored at home."

"Oh, sucks," the other person said, turning on a sink. 

"Or, well, my roommate Felix should be home. I think he got off class five- ten minutes ago or so. I could bring him out to do something, but other than that, there's not much, really.."

Felix saw Hyunjin look down at him, caressing his head gently. "Your friend?" He mouthed, Felix just shutting his eyes. 

Hyunjin seemingly found that funny, trying to get Felix to go down deeper, slightly moving his hips closer to Felix. He held back a gag, furrowing his brows. Asshole.

"Ah well, you can come home to mine if you want. We can just dip and buy a snack or two, head home and watch a movie." The guy suggested, turning off the sink. "Huh, where do you live?" Seungmin asked. "By the car dealer." 

"So, twenty minutes?" Seungmin asked. 

"Yeah, should be. I come and go by car, you can hop in." 

"Sure, but- I don't know if we should skip. Either way, she might notice we left. Even if not, I have another class after this."

The guy laughed, "What? How late are you staying? Just come with me. Hey, Teacher won't notice anything- we sat at the back anyway. You can take a couple classes off, can't you?"

Seungmin hummed, "I guess I could, but what is there to do at yours anyway? A movie is something you can watch anywhere." Felix could hear the usual sassy tone in Seungmin's voice that time.

"Well, is it 'anywhere' you can watch a movie and fuck at the same time?" 

The silence after was immediate before Seungmin giggled. "Shit, Chris. You're gonna be the end of me." The next thing Felix heard was the bathroom door swinging open before shutting again, an eerie silence filling the area afterwards.

Felix finally let himself let out a quiet moan, what the fuck, Seungmin?

Well, was he one to talk? He was giving head in a goddamn bathroom stall.

"Ah, pretty boy. I can tell you're taking your time, huh? Thing is, I don't have much time, Jeongin is waiting for me in my car." Hyunjin frowned, free hand reaching down and wrapping around Felix's scarf. "It's a shame, though. I wish I could spend more time with you." He gave the scarf a light tug, trying to pull it off, but ultimately deciding otherwise. 

"Huh.." he muttered, wrapping his fist around the scarf, giving it another tug, this time towards him, lightly cutting off Felix's airflow while bringing him further down his dick. 

"Oh goodness, Kitty. Remind me to send you money for a leash and a costume. Next time I bring you over, I'll dress you up, but you get to pick the outfit yourself. I'm sure you'd have great taste."

Felix blushed at the words. It was a little embarrassing. He'd never been asked to wear a.. costume or anything- let alone a leash. Maybe handcuffs or ropes to restrain him, but this? This was some next level kinky stuff- he'd never tried it before- and he wasn't sure if he wanted to either.

"Would you like that, little Kitty?" Hyunjin hummed, caressing the side of Felix's cheek with the hand not around his scarf, tugging at it again. 

Felix gagged, tightening his grip around Hyunjin's thighs while continuing to suck him off. "I think you'd look adorable. Not that you don't already look cute than everyone I know."

This idiot, why was he so fucking teasing and kind and flirty but annoying. Well was he even annoying? Was Felix just hating to hate?

No, this guy was crazy. Tug. And Felix should've never worn the scarf to begin with. Tug. Why was he so insistent on Felix showing his hickeys anyway? Motherfucker, he 'owned' him- if you could even call it that- for a couple hours. He couldn't decide what he did after. 

Tug.

Well, he did pay for it- but then not at the same time. He was unclear with what he wanted, that was his fault.

This buffoon didn't deserve his time. Felix shouldn't let him 'buy' him again.

He made a mental note to deny Hyunjin more time with him, trying to just finish the task he had at hand now. 

"Oh god Felix," the way he moaned his name sent a shiver up Felix's spine. He wanted to hear it again.

Going down slowly but deeply onto his cock, taking the most he could- which still left a little untouched- he instead wrapped a hand around the part, jerking him off while sucking. 

Hyunjin grunted, a sound from deep in his throat, tightening his hold around the scarf, making Felix feel his airflow be cut off. 

He continued although feeling lightheaded, quickening his movements and taking as much as he could. "You're doing good-" Hyunjin sucked in a breath, rolling his hips against Felix's mouth, chasing his high. "I'm close.. I'll pull off, okay?" 

Felix hummed, the sound sending vibrations up Hyunjin's cock, bringing him that much closer to the edge. "Good Kitty.."

Felix should've found the name cringe, but it'd kind of grown on him now. He moaned instead, sending more vibrations to Hyunjin's cock before he felt it twitch in his mouth. "Fuck.. I'm close," he announced, bringing both hands to cup Felix's cheeks, throwing his own thrusts in, holding Felix still by the head. 

"Fuck.. fuck-" he groaned, giving it one last thrust before pulling out, releasing on Felix's face. "Oh Felix, so pretty like this.. my artwork. Should paint you like this more often."

Felix shut his eyes, cringing at the sticky feeling covering his face. Not long after he felt Hyunjin pick him off the ground and seat him on the toilet- lid down, of course. 

He wiped his face down with some wipes he had in his pocket, discarding of them in the trash can. "You did good, Felix. Very good, I'm proud." 

Felix pursed his lips, trying not to blush at the praise, staring with glossy eyes up at Hyunjin afterwards. "Is it better? Or else you can wash your face in the sink. I'll hold the door shut."

Felix shook his head, "I'll do it myself. You can go." 

"Are you sure?" Hyunjin asked, taking the hind and leaving when Felix nodded. He didn't forget to grab his sweatshirt off of the ground first though- and thank goodness Hyunjin put it there- because the soft material of it made it bearable to sit on the ground, his knees not hurting one bit. 

Felix pushed his hair back, walking out to the sinks after checking there was no evidence leftover from what they did on the ground or anything. Luckily, it was safe, and he went to the sink instead, throwing his bag on the countertop. 

Just then, he noticed his scarf gone, all his hickeys on display for anyone to see. "Huh?.." he almost whined, searching for it, though it was clear it wasn't there. Hyunjin had taken it. That fucking asshole. Now he'd have to face him again just to retrieve his scarf!

He groaned, washing his hands, giving his face a splash as well- though Hyunjin had cleaned it well enough with those wet wipes he had- and shook his hands dry. There was conveniently no more paper in the dispensers.

Fucking idiots.

He licked over his lips in the mirror, making random shapes with his mouth to help deal with the stretch. He felt his lip tear, muttering a little: "Oh my fucking god.." before clearing his throat. He sounded totally messed up- and anyone that heard him would probably know what he'd done- if they ever did it themselves- but luckily, he didn't have anyone else to talk to for the rest of the day.

Well, maybe there was Seungmin, but he was sure he'd be occupied enough with Chris or whoever it was. At least until he'd gotten some tea or throat-soothing candy down his throat.

Ding.

His phone chimed, and he pulled it from his back pocket while throwing on his bag again, licking the blood than ran down his lip from that tear. 

Boss: Felix, we may need you to come in today for an hour or two. We're short staffed on waiters today, and as it's Friday, it'll be a busy day. Please turn back as soon as you can.

"Motherfucker."

Chapter Text

Felix shut the door of the staff bathroom, leaning against the door, he shut his eyes. "Ah goodness, I can't take this anymore." He opened his eyes, staring at no particular spot, deep in his thoughts.

He shoved his hand in the pocket of his pants, checking the time on his phone. There, he noticed a message. 

: Hey Kitten, I was wondering when you'd be free again? You should just come to me whenever you need more money instead of going home to random men you meet at a bar. It's dangerous.

: Are you busy? You're not answering. What are your plans this weekend?

: I really hope you aren't purposefully ignoring me Sweetheart.

Felix ran a hand over his face. Hyunjin. For goodness sake, he didn't need this right now.

Felix: I'm busy, sorry.

He quickly changed the contact name. 

Hyunjin: Well you just answered, did you see my previous messages?

Hyunjin: Felix, I hope you aren't messing around right now partying or something. Tell me you're not with older men right now.

Felix rolled his eyes, you don't need to know idiot. 

Felix: Sorry, can't talk!

He shoved his phone away, washing his hands despite only touching his phone- he had to be clean as he was serving people's beverages and meals. He took one last deep breath, unlocking the door and rushing back out to take people's orders. If only people weren't so damn loud, it might've enjoyable.

Or, if he was allowed to listen to music meanwhile. But naturally, that wouldn’t work. Then he couldn't hear people.

Heck he should just put on one of his playlists over the speakers instead of this random one with the top hits.

Not that the songs were bad, he loved Ariana, Taylor and Blackpink, but god how he was getting tired of the same songs playing over and over again.

Lovesick girls,

Love story,

One last time,

As if it's your last,

We can't be friends,

They had ruined his favorite songs. Stupid ass playlist.

Now he couldn't ever listen to them without wanting to rip his ears off. 

They could at least have a 10 hour long playlist instead of this 1 hour one going on loop and loop.

He grabbed his notepad, approaching a new table, "Good evening you guys, are you ready to order yet?" He smiled.

A mom smiled at him, "Oh we're still figuring out our meals." 

"Okay, can I get you started with some drinks then?" He smiled at the whole family. 

"Sure, we'd like two sodas, one of these lemonades, and a beer please."

"Sure, I can go get that for you now then. Which flavor soda would you like?" Felix smiled.

A teenage boy rolled his eyes, "I've already said I want a Pepsi, god.." 

The mom shushed him, "Well he didn't hear that, have some manners. A Pepsi and Fanta please." 

Felix appreciated her. "Okay, I'll be out in a minute." He smiled, disappearing again.

Filling four glasses with the drinks, he placed them on a tray, bringing them back to the family. "Here you go," he placed them down one by one. "And there are free refills on the sodas, if you just call over a waiter, they can go get it for you." 

"Thank you very much," The dad smiled, already sipping from his beer.

"You're very welcome, Felix muttered more so to himself, heading to another set of people to seat them at a empty table. 

Hopefully he didn't have to serve them, they were a group of seven people.

…

Finally finishing his shift after cleaning and serving and walking at least a couple thousand damn steps, he took off his uniform, changing back into his sweater, groaning at the uncomfortable feeling in his feet. They hurt from how long he'd worn his shoes.

That stupid little boy from that family table had spilled his soda twice in a row. Felix had to use so much more energy on not going insane. 

The dad wanted at least three refills on his goddamn beer, and the mom had to constantly deal with her annoying son.

Oh how Felix felt bad for her.

I'm never having any kids. He thought, leaving the restaurant from a back door, doing some quick grocery shopping on the floor below in the mall before heading home.

He just bought some vegetables and eggs, milk, something to use for dinner tomorrow. Hopefully Seungmin made something. It was almost eight, and he was starving.

Luckily, he'd worked from two-thirty to seven-thirty, which meant he'd get paid for all those extra hours.

Besides, it weren't even his shifts, he was covering, so that meant more pay.

"At least it's over now.." he muttered, starting his ten minute walk home. 

He hadn't even checked his phone after his shift- he was too exhausted- so he had no idea what was happening at home. 

When he kicked the door open though, he regretted ever coming back. "Seungminnie, I'm back." He announced, placing the bags of food on the ground, taking off his shoes, washing his hands before wandering through the house. 

He noticed a pot of some pasta on the stove, smiling a bit to himself. Thank you, Seungmin.

He knocked on Seungmin's door, slowly pushing it open when he heard nothing.

"Minnie?" He whispered, seeing the curtains in his room shut. He spotted Seungmin sleeping in his bed with another male beside him, scrolling on their phone. 

"Oh, hello." Felix smiled. 

"Oh, hey." The male said, and Felix recognized the voice. This was the guy Seungmin skipped class with, right?

The guy snuck out of bed, carefully trying to avoid Seungmin so he wouldn't wake him up. He left the room, quietly shutting the door behind the two. "You must be Felix," the male smiled. "Seungmin told me about you. Said you were roommates."

Felix felt he recognized his face. He looked like one of the guys Jeongin and Hyunjin sat with at a table in the cafeteria a few days ago. Was he maybe also there at the restaurant a few days ago? Felix smiled, "That's correct."

"I'm Chris. His friend."

"Ah.." Felix nodded, "Well, it's nice to meet you. I just got back from a shift, that's why I'm back so late."

"Oh right, you worked at that.. restaurant in the mall nearby, right?"

Felix nodded, "Yes I do. I've seen you before, haven't I?"

Chris hesitantly nodded. "Yeah, at school too, right? Jeongin has been talking a bit about you recently."

Felix chuckled, "Good things I hope."

"Yeah, no worries. Hyunjin has also brought you up once or twice."

Felix felt shivers up his spine at that. "Hyunjin? What has he.. you know, said?" He asked hesitantly, nervously.

"Oh he's just seen you once or twice and thought you were cute. Something about wanting to get closer to you? He probably wants to be friends."

Friends.. right.

"Oh how sweet.." Felix forced a smile. "Well he seems.. fun, from what I've seen yet."

Chris chuckled, "He's something alright.. but hey, I can totally message him for you, say that you find him interesting. You can schedule a hangout or something."

"Oh, that's really not necessary- I mean as you've seen today I have a busy schedule. Work and everything."

Chris squinted his eyes a bit, looking almost skeptical. "Well it's not every day you're working, right?"

Felix blushed, embarrassed. "I mean, I can reach out to him myself."

"Ah don't bother, he's impossible to find at school, we as his friends can't even. Let me just message him for you." Chris placed a hand on Felix's shoulder. Just when he was about to protest, Chris spoke up again. "Also, I made dinner. It's in that pot on the stove. Seungmin was hungry and tired, so I cooked up a little something with the ingredients you had in your fridge. I hope you don't mind."

Oh, so it was him who made food for them.. then he felt a bit bad rejecting his offer. 

"Okay," Felix scratched the back of his head. "I mean sure, you can tell Hyunjin or something.. And thanks for cooking, it's perfectly fine."

Chris smiled. "I'll head back to Seungmin's room, don't worry, I'll be out by midnight." 

"Oh I don't mind," Felix smiled. "I suppose I'll see you around, then?"

"Definitely will," Chris smiled, disappearing into Seungmin's room again.

Felix sighed. He wouldn't have time for Hyunjin anyway. It didn't matter what Chris texted him- well, as long as it wasn't something too suggestive or friendly. Felix wasn't seeking Hyunjin as a friend after all.

His eyes stayed glued to the spot where Chris stood for a second before he heard his stomach growling. He instinctively put a hand over his stomach, going to fetch some food for himself. 

Lazily reaching for a plate, he served himself a portion way to big, sitting at their dining table and eating while finally checking his phone again.

Hyunjin: You better not be doing this to purposefully annoy me. I know you're not out, you're just trying to tick me off aren't you?

I actually was out, stupid.

Hyunjin: I'm hosting a party tomorrow evening. I'd rather have you come than to have you sleeping around with men who are just going to take advantage of you. It's from six in the evening to one in the morning. You know where I live, consider it.

Felix: You think I'm gonna go by myself? I think I'll pass..

It didn't even take a minute for Hyunjin to respond.

Hyunjin: You can bring one person if you want.

Felix chewed his food, damn, this Chris guy was good. 

Felix: So I can bring Jisung? 

Hyunjin: If you want, then yeah, but Jeongin will be there too. You're comfortable with him, right?

Felix: I'll consider it then.. but I might still go out. I think a drink and a client sounds just as good as this 'party' you're hosting. 

Felix smiled to himself, it was kind of funny or some reason, reminding Hyunjin he could do whatever he wanted. Who was he to tell him what not to do anyway? In reality, Felix was planning on just sleeping tomorrow, but maybe it'd be interesting to go to a college party. It'd been a good while anyway.

He instead just went on Twitter and scrolled until he finally finished all his food, almost falling asleep on the spot from exhaustion, forcing himself up to brush his teeth and change into his pj's. He'd taken a shower after class, before heading to work. He didn't want to go to work feeling dirty anyway. It felt like people would've been able to tell if he didn't shower first.

He was probably just ashamed. Well, it was something to be ashamed off.

But it wasn't his fault his parents died when he and his sister were so young, and he had no money or anything left whatsoever. 

Maybe if they'd just been luckier, and avoided all the incidents that happened back to back.

But, enough of those thoughts, he tucked himself into bed, listening to the white noise of his room, staring up at his ceiling. 

He heard faint whispers from a room, probably Seungmin's room, Seungmin and Chris talking, and shut his eyes, focusing on that sound. He couldn't make out what they said, but enjoyed having something to listen to.

Soon enough, he fell asleep, waking up to the sun shining through his curtains. He groaned, turning to bury his head under one of his pillows to hide from the dark, sighing deeply.

He tried getting more sleep, but once he woke up, it wasn't possible for him to fall back asleep again. Never was.

Instead, he just stayed still, lying down until he finally got the energy to reach for his phone. It was only eight in the morning. He usually liked sleeping till ten on weekends. Maybe even eleven.

But clearly, today that wasn't possible. Maybe he could just take a afternoon nap or something.

He stretched, yawning widely while rolling himself out of bed, feeling a faint ache in his legs. Probably from all the walking yesterday. Who needed a gym when they had to work as a waiter for five hours every once in a while?

He threw on a tee shirt, keeping his pj pants on, strolling to the kitchen to find something to eat. Surprisingly he saw Seungmin on the couch, already awake. "Oh, goodmorning Min. You're up early."

Seungmin giggled, clicking on a movie to watch. "You shouldn't be the one to say that."

Felix chuckled, scratching the back of his neck. "Yeah well.. I woke up and you know how that goes. Can never fall asleep again." 

"Sucks.. you can just go to bed earlier tonight." Seungmin shrugged.

Felix nodded, agreeing. "Yeah, I probably will- try to at least." Then he remembered the message he'd gotten the previous night. A party, at Hyunjin's. 

"Hey Min," 

"Hm?" 

"Hyunjin messaged me and said he's hosting a party tonight. He said I was allowed to bring a person to join me, and I was thinking maybe bringing Jisung, but maybe you can come too."

"Hyunjin?" Seungmin furrowed his brows. "Who's this Hyunjin everyone is talking about. Chris mentioned him too. He said he was going to the party as well, wanted to bring me as a plus one or something. Does everyone except me know this guy or what?"

Felix giggled, "Chris is a friend of Hyunjin's, I know him from Jeongin, that little guy you've met a couple times at school. I was just thinking, I mean we could consider going or something. Jisung might be up for it as well."

"Honestly, Chris asked me and I was really just thinking about heading out there. I mean I can always just leave if it's boring. It's summer, it'll bright outside till like 10 or something." Seungmin muttered. "I'll go if you go."

Felix hummed, "I mean.. I'll ask Ji or Changbin, though I think he has a shift today, I'll still check."

Seungmin laughed, "Changbin has a shift today? That's hilarious. Imagine working on weekends."

"I've worked weekends before, and I have a shift tomorrow." Felix stared at Seungmin who stopped laughing. "Well it's only funny when it's him." 

Felix giggled, going to the bathroom to freshen up. Afterwards he poured himself a bowl of cereal, finishing up with whatever milk they had leftover. He knew he'd forgotten to buy something yesterday.

"For dinner I bought some ingredients for fried rice. We can consider making that before- maybe- heading to the party." Felix said, sitting by the coffee table, watching the movie Seungmin was watching, eating his food.

"Sure, it's a easy dish anyway." Seungmin muttered, too focused on his movie.

...

"Come on, Min! Didn't you say he was waiting for us?" Felix called out, standing in his way too short shorts and high boots, waiting almost anxiously for Seungmin. Seungmin said Chris had come to pick them up, and said he was waiting downstairs five minutes ago or so. They couldn't be too late.

"I'm coming," Seungmin ran to Felix, smiling sweetly. "He won't mind anyway. I told him we'd be a minute or two."

"Yeah well it's been five, so come on." Felix and Seungmin squeezed out the door, Felix locking it behind the two. "Somehow we're always late." Felix giggled, Seungmin dragging him down the staircase to Chris' car, parked outside.

Felix just prayed Seungmin was bringing him to the right car, because they all looked the same, and Felix wasn't trying to get abducted or anything. Luckily, it was the right car, with Seungmin sitting with Felix in the back so he wouldn't be alone.

"About time you two," Chris chuckled, starting his car. 

"Seungmin had to change." Felix ratted him out, smirking as Chris shook his head disapprovingly. Seungmin rolled his eyes. "Did you two want me to show up naked or what?"

"Honestly.." Felix started, pulling a laugh from Chris. 

"No, Min, it's fine, we'll make it in time. Besides, the party will last hours. We could show at nine and still have four hours to spend there." Chris said.

"That's true. Why is he letting people stay so late.." Felix muttered. 

"Yeah, I usually stop at midnight, but his parents are in their house a city away, so he has the place all for himself. Doesn't even need to worry about cleaning or keeping it a secret. They rarely show up there unless it's for celebrations or family dinners."

"They have another house? But wait, doesn't he live in a penthouse? Aren't those like crazy expensive?"

Chris chuckled, "They are, but his parents are really wealthy. They just own a couple places, and as money isn't a problem, why not go for expensive places?"

"That's crazy. I wanna live like that one day." Seungmin said, staring out the window. 

"Well you're on the right track, Min. You're parents are wealthy anyway. I think you'll make a great surgeon." Felix smiled.

"Wow thank you," Seungmin smiled, wiggling his eyebrows at Felix, then winking. Felix rolled his eyes, muttering something incoherent under his breath. "The only problem with being a surgeon is that you have to concentrate a lot, and if I can't listen to music while operating, I think I'll die, but then I'll get paid so much, I don't know if I should look forward to becoming one or dread it." Seungmin sighed.

"I mean, I don't think you'd want music when you were actually performing surgery on someone anyway. I feel like you'd forget everything other than what you're doing." Felix shrugged. "Besides, if there was music, what if you just started busting out those moves mid surgery?"

Seungmin laughed, "Oh my goodness, that'd be kind of hilarious, but horrible at the same time. I just hope I won't lose my free time if I become a surgeon. You work long hours at times."

"Don't worry, you'll be good." Felix smiled. "But enough of this talk, I don't even know what I wanna be in the future." Felix sighed. "I'll just find a office job or something." 

"You'd be a sexy business man." Seungmin smirked, causing Felix to roll his eyes again. "Yeah, yeah. Do we know where Jisung is though?"

Seungmin checked the time on his phone. "Yeah I think he'll be there soon enough. We might run into each other when we get there." 

"He doesn't need a ride or anything?" Chris asked, already soon at the building where Hyunjin lived. 

"No, he'll be good. He's got quick little legs." Seungmin said, unintentionally making Felix burst out laughing, imagining Jisung running with tiny little legs. Oh lord.

"If you say so," Chris muttered, turning on his blinker and driving into the parking lot outside the tall apartments. 

The three of them got out, shutting the doors behind themselves. Staring at the building in front of him, Felix realized how far up he'd been. It was kind of scary how tall some buildings could be, especially knowing there were bigger buildings in the world.

He could never live in a penthouse, he was too scared. 

What if there were many people at this party, and they knock the whole building over 'cause they were too heavy?

He was soon enough dragged out of those thoughts when a male jumped on his back. "Oh fuck- Jisung you scared the shit out of me." 

"Sorry Lix, I just got so excited to see you. You too, Seungmin." Jisung smiled, giving Seungmin a little hug, briefly introducing himself to Chris. The four of them made it inside the building with the spare key Chris had- wow, trusting someone enough to give them a key to your penthouse?- waiting for the elevator to come down from the top floor.

When they reached the floor Hyunjin lived on, Felix was surprised that he didn't hear any music at all. Well a expensive home like this would have soundproof walls, right?

Opening the door that wasn't even locked, Felix suddenly got blasted with the sound of music in his ears. Yeah- definitely soundproof walls. 

He shut the door behind him- being the last to walk in- following Chris through the home. "Drink?" he asked, and if it weren't for his lip reading, he wouldn't even had heard what Chris said. 

Not that the music was that loud, but there was quite a distance between the two. Felix nodded, bringing the liquid to his lips, smelling it first. It smelled fruity. He gave it a little sip, just to get a idea on what it was, before taking comfortable sips of it. 

It tasted very good, like exotic fruits with a hint of alcohol in it. 

"Did Hyunjin make this?" he asked out of curiosity. Chris nodded, "Yeah, I think. Minho might've helped, or Jeongin."

"Ah okay," Felix nodded, taking more sips of the mixture. 

"I want more," Jisung said, having already finished his drink. "It tastes good." 

"Go ahead," Chris chuckled, "I'll be out searching for the others." he said before disappearing from the kitchen again. Felix leaned his elbows against the counter island, looking over to Seungmin.

"Seungmin, how do you even know Chris?" 

"We have a couple classes together. I'd seen him a couple times before when he initiated a conversation yesterday. He's sweet." 

Felix smiled, "Great." because even if he wanted to, he couldn't say anything about overhearing his conversation with Chris the day before, because he was meant to be off from class, not in the bathroom stall sucking Hyunjin off. He didn't want Seungmin to question anything. 

"Well, I'm gonna go look for a handsome guy now." Jisung announced, putting the flimsy plastic cup back on the counter. "Who's gonna join me?" 

"I'll come in a minute, I just want a little more to drink- to loosen up." Felix said, Seungmin agreeing. "If you want you can wait five minutes for us Ji." 

Jisung pouted, ultimately deciding on waiting for the two, though always complaining about them being slow and taking too long.

Eventually though, the two were done, Jisung practically dragging them through the house despite never being there before, leading them into the- well, what Felix would assume was the living room- he couldn't tell from the million people there- blending in with the crowd.

Felix just stayed glued to Seungmin while Jisung began rubbing himself against other people. "If this is how he is after two mild drinks, we can't let him get drunk tonight." Felix muttered, slowly dancing with him.

Seungmin chuckled, "I think he's excited. Isn't this the first party he has attended in months?" he asked.

Felix shrugged. "Can't remember. We should just watch out for him either way. I don't know some of these people." 

Seungmin nodded, "Yup, he'll be fine, don't worry. I think people who aren't interested in him in that way are scared of him anyway. He's like a monkey who escaped from his cage."

Felix laughed, "You don't say." he smiled, looking at Jisung already talking with a random guy as if he'd known him for a decade.

Well, maybe he had.

He went back to Seungmin, paying attention to him again, dancing. It wasn't until he felt a finger poke at his shoulder he turned from Seungmin, eyeing the male who touched him up and down. "You're cute." he said, Felix smiling. "Thank you."

"Why don't you come with me, just over to the kitchen?"

Felix glanced back at Seungmin who encouraged him, giving him a little smirk. Felix rolled his eyes, but followed the man nonetheless. He was alright, hair with a couple dyed streaks in it, sweet round eyes and a cute laughter.

He was actually pretty cute, but Felix wasn't quite looking for anything with him. Or, well, he could always just spend the night with him. Just for the fun of it.

He sipped down the shot the man handed him, cringing at the taste. It was a little too strong and bitter tasting for his liking, but he'd never really been the type to like dark coffee or strong alcohol anyway. Naturally his face always contorted strangely at the taste.

"Well, you know I live just a five minute walk from here, if you're up for it, we could head over there for a bit." The man offered, smiling almost nervously at Felix.

Felix chuckled, "For what reason?" he raised a teasing eyebrow. The man blushed, pressing his lips together before nearing Felix a little bit, hesitantly wrapping a arm around his waist. "You know, just have some one-on-one time. Get to know each other better."

"I think you two know each other well enough," A voice called beside Felix, pushing the arm off of him. 

The guy furrowed his brows, "What? What do you mean?" 

Felix shot his head around though he damn well knew it was Hyunjin. 

"Felix here already has plans for the rest of the night- and tomorrow night, and the remaining days of the month." Hyunjin announced, looking oddly proud of himself as if he'd won a trophy or something.

"No I don't." Felix said, glaring back at the guy he was previously talking to. He looked so sweet and kind, he felt bad. "I think you're confusing me with someone else." Felix raised an eyebrow in a way it was clear he wasn't happy.

Hyunjin shook his head. "No Felix, I'm not drunk. I assume you aren't either, I think you know what I mean."

"No, I don't, Hyunjin. I'm just over here trying to talk with-"

The guy frantically shook his hands in front of him, "Oh no, no it's fine- I was just gonna find my friend anyway, it's alright- I didn't mean to get in between you two or anything." 

Felix shook his head, "No, you're n-"

"Thank you," Hyunjin cut him off, smiling sweetly as the man disappeared away again. 

Felix furrowed his eyebrows. "What the fuck was that for?"

"He wanted to sleep with you. That's why he offered taking you home." Hyunjin sighed.

"Yeah I'm not stupid, what's your- wait- why were you eavesdropping anyway?!" 

Hyunjin puckered his lips, "I wasn't." 

"You clearly were! Why do you think you get to choose who I sleep around with and not? I'll sleep-" Felix lowered his voice, just in case, "I'll sleep with old men if I want. If it earns me money, I'll do it. If I want to sleep with cute boys, I will. You can't decide for me what I do and don't."

"I don't think it's safe to sleep with older men. I mean why would they hire a barely legal boy to fuck. That sounds like pedophilia." Hyunjin shrugged. 

Felix rolled his eyes, "It's not. By barely legal you mean legal for two years? I'm twenty- that's not young. Too young at least- either way it doesn't matter. You shouldn't care so much. You were just like them- a one time thing. Except it's been more than one time.. You get what I mean."

Hyunjin laughed, "But you like me. You got turned on last time we fucked."

"Because it's sex, it's natural to get turned on." Felix crossed his arms. 

"Do you get turned on by your other clients?" Hyunjin asked, placing his hands on his hips. 

"Why do you wanna know when I get turned on?" Felix asked, seeing how Hyunjin held back a laugh at the question. "It's not funny." 

"It kind of is," Hyunjin smiled, "I just care for your safety. I mean sleeping with men double your age or more just sounds sketchy. When they were twenty you weren't even born. When they were thirty you were ten. Imagine that."

"No, I won't imagine that. I didn't start prostitution at ten, okay? You can't say that- that's child pornography. I started when I was over eighteen, okay? I was legal."

"Well it's still bad, you shouldn't do it. If I was a older man, how would you know I'm not just going to bring you home and keep you there forever. Torture and rape you before throwing your body away in a lake."

Felix frowned. "What the hell? No one would do that!"

Hyunjin narrowed his eyes. "They would. Or demand money from your parents." 

Felix felt his heart drop when Hyunjin said that. "Don't say that."

"But it's true. People often abduct others to get money or pleasure from their victims. You're cute- so adorable. I think everyone knows that. Kidnappers too. They could demand millions from your parents as it's clear your everyone loves you- including your paren-"

"Stop bringing up my parents, Hyunjin! We live in a safe country, okay? No one is gonna get abducted- let alone a man! If anything kidnappers go for vulnerable women- you know that. How many people in this world are gay anyway? Sadly, it's women they target. No one would want someone like me to hold hostage. You can't get anything from me."

"Well if you go home with a old man they're obviously interested in men. Think about if they kill you and sell you for your organs. You'll never get to live your life. You'll never see your friends again. Never hug your parents again."

"Hyunjin, stop- I've done it for so long and I'm safe, okay? Nothing will happen. The only thing happening is you scaring me out of my job, and I'll end up broke on the streets. Alone. Is that what you want?"

Hyunjin frowned, "I never said that. I'm just worried for you- and despite you saying you're safe, you can never be too sure. I just want the best for you. Besides, you won't end up broke on the streets. You can just stay at a friends house. I know you have a handful of them. Or- even better, go home to your parents-"

"Goddammit Hyunjin I told you to stop bringing them up." 

"What is your issue with that? I just think parents would be worried out of their minds if their child got hurt or abducted."

"Hyunjin-"

"Maybe you've had a fight or two with them, but they'll still be sad if you get taken by some creep."

"Hyunjin, my parents are dead, alright? They won't care- they're buried in the ground- they're dead, they won't even know." Felix sighed frustrated, dropping his head. "They won't care."

Hyunjin stayed quiet for a bit, scanning Felix's face. "They are?"

Felix almost chuckled, "Yeah. Why else do you think I'd do this? I have no grandparents, my parents are dead, I have no idea where my fucking little sister is- fuck, I have no family. I'm twenty and all alone if it weren't for my friends. I can assure you no one cares, Hyunjin. It's fine, alright?"

Hyunjin gave it a second, then bit his lip. "Well I care." 

"You don't even know me, Hyunjin. What's my family name? My birthday? Favorite animal? You don't know because we aren't friends. If something bad happened you'd all forget me in the span of two months anyway- well, maybe aside from Seungmin, Changbin and Jisung- but you? You have no reason to care. I'm perfectly fine and can take care of myself, so I don't need you to tell me what or what not to do when all I've been doing these last six years is take care of myself."

Hyunjin pursed his lips. "I'm sorry, I didn't know." 

"It doesn't matter, I don't really care about them anymore- at least I try not to- but something I will care about and certainly not appreciate is people like you and those fuckass wrinkly men telling me what to do as if you know any better than me. I matured from a young age, okay? I've known how to take care of myself."

"I didn't mean to make you feel like I was treating you like a kid or like you weren't capable of taking care of yourself." His voice softened, quietly saying: "I'm sorry. I was just worried for you."

Felix sucked in a breath, it wasn't really a sensitive topic for him anymore, but it could still sadden him whenever someone brought it up unexpectedly. "It's alright, but you don't need to worry. I got it all under control." 

Hyunjin bit his lip, "Do you want to talk about it?" 

No, I don't.

"It's alright, I'm not really sad about it anymore." he felt slight stings in his eyes, feeling them turn more glossy. He wasn't even sad, his body just reacted on it's own whenever someone asked him if he was okay or wanted to talk. He never wanted to talk, but his body would always give in- even if he didn't want to.

Hyunjin narrowed his eyes unconvinced, "Are you sure?"

Felix nodded, wanting to go somewhere else because he felt like he was gonna cry. It was so annoying- he wasn't even sad, but he was always crying. Always.

"You look like you're about to cry, though." Hyunjin said, and Felix couldn't help but let a tear slip at that. "I don't know why- I'm really okay," Felix tilted his head down, trying to blink the tears away. "I'm not even sad but I'm crying. I think I'm just a overly sensitive."

Hyunjin put his hand on his back, caressing it. "It's okay. It's normal if something traumatic or heartbreaking happened. Maybe it's just a wound deep down in your heart your never got the chance to heal. Sometimes you just need to let it out and take the time to heal it, however your way of coping works. Maybe for you it's crying, letting out tears you never got to spill earlier on."

Felix accidentally let out a sob when trying to exhale. He remembered he had to take care of his little sister back when he found out what'd happened to their parents. He was the older one there- fourteen- and had to protect her before himself. He didn't want to cry in front of her, because then she would panic. Instead he just sat anxiously talking with her, trying to keep calm when it felt like the earth had turned on him.

He never really got the chance to cry because he had to stay by her side every hour for the following days. They had no grandparents to stay at, so they stayed with a cousin who lived cities away until they got placed in a adoption center.

She was turning eight, he was fourteen. Who do you think people would adopt? 

Obviously no one wanted a old kid like Felix, everyone wanted someone like his sister. 

That's why he had no idea where she was. She got adopted long before he even turned eighteen and had the chance to search for her.

"Felix, do you wanna go somewhere else?" Hyunjin asked. They were still in the kitchen of the party after all, and maybe Felix would prefer hiding away in one of the rooms. Felix didn't even think about it when he nodded, letting Hyunjin bring him to one of the locked rooms, unlocking it with a key and bringing the two of them in, locking the door again. Felix didn't even know he was crying until he heard his own sobs. Previously the music was blocking out the sound.

"Don't you wanna sit?" Hyunjin asked. 

Felix wiped his tears. It was so embarrassing for no reason. Well, maybe it was for him, but Hyunjin didn't seem to care. "Come here," Hyunjin patted the bed, Felix slowly making his way there. 

"You can just sit here for a while if you want. I'll leave if you want me to, or I could drive you home. You decide."

Felix shook his head. "No it's fine, I just need to get myself together. I usually cry at the smallest things. I'm really okay- my body just doesn't listen to me." he wiped a tear away again, taking a deep breath.

He'd learned long ago to let the past stay in the past and move on for your own better. But- it was a little harder when it came to your family- or, well, what was his family. Not that they're really here anymore.

Except his sister. She was still here- somewhere. He knew that, just not where. 

"Okay," Hyunjin said quietly, voice almost a whisper. "If you want to talk though I'm here- or I can get your friend."

Felix shook his head. "No it's fine, I'll be out in a minute."

Hyunjin pursed his lips, then hesitantly asked: "Can I hear what happened?"

Felix calmed his breathing, still controlling his blinking to stop tears from coming. "It was just a car accident. They were on the way to the bank." 

Hyunjin nodded, hesitantly scooting over the bed closer to Felix. Felix inhaled deeply, "We never really had much money growing up. My parents tried and worked hard, but then our apartment caught on fire and we lost everything. One of the tenants left the stove on overnight, and we all rushed outside at one in the morning."

"When the firemen stopped the fire, there wasn't much left of the building. Well, it partially stood, but only the bottom floors. Floor three and up were either gone or burnt to ashes. My parents sought us a hotel for the rest of the night, but I don't think they slept at all."

"The next morning, we- my sister and I- were watching tv in the hotel room while my parents took a early morning drive to a nearby bank to discuss something. Probably if insurance would repay them in any way, or if the tenant who caused the fire would get a fine or anything, but they never made it back."

"It was a reckless driver trying to get somewhere, running a red light and hitting them. It completely crushed their car, and they didn't survive. Next thing I know I leave my sister on the bed to watch her cartoons while I open the door of the hotel room. I remember it didn't have a peek hole, and all I heard was soft knocking, so I thought it was my mom."

"Instead, it was the receptionist with some paper files in hand, and two officers beside her. How do you think trying to explain that situation to a fourteen and seven year old worked?" Felix chuckled airily. "We were even separated when they told us. I felt like I was going to puke, meanwhile my sister didn't quite understand, asking when they'd be back. I cried a little in the police officers arms until my sister came back and I had to put on my big brother-mask. I didn't want to scare her."

"I mean I think she understood, but not really at the same time. She knew something bad had happened, but she always knew mom and dad would come back. How do you explain to someone so young who's always been told mommy is there for her, that she suddenly wouldn't be? It was quite hard, and the police kept us at the station until distant family picked us up."

"We stayed there for a month or so before being placed in a adoption center. I didn't wanna be separated from my sister- she was my only family left at that point, and I was just fourteen- so I didn't want to go to foster care as it wasn't perminant anyway, and I didn't want her to be alone. She got adopted after a month or so though, and I barely even got to say goodbye before she was gone for good."

"She didn't understand why I couldn't come with her, but her new parents seemed so sweet, I promised her she would be in good hands. I still believe she is. I just wonder if we'll ever meet again. Maybe she doesn't even remember."

"Either way, aside from all that traumatic stuff, that was how I met and became friends with Seungmin and Changbin. They approached me at school after I got transferred to a different one, and I eventually opened up to them. They were super kind, and so were their parents. They'd treat me like their own, and it almost feels like my whole life was spent at either Seungmin's house with his parents, or at Changbin's house. They always had me over."

"Their parents were angels as well. So kind and understanding- and Seungmin and Changbin must've told them because they never asked about my family- which I now realize I should've appreciated. I still need to thank them properly one day. After starting college we met Jisung too, and I never went home to Seungmin or Changbin again or saw their family. I will pay them a visit before finishing college I think. That's when I'm parting ways with them anyway."

"I'll probably also give Jisung, Seungmin and Changbin presents too. I need a way to thank them properly for everything. Seungmin has covered my part of rent multiple times when I struggled, even offering to pay it all- we share a little rented apartment together. He's an angel."

"Jisung too. He always makes me laugh even when I'm breaking down. It's magic honestly. And Changbin, he's always made me feel loved with words and hugs. His hugs are the best- god, you should really ask him for one." Felix laughed. "He's not here today though, he has a shift at the restaurant. The same one I work at." Felix finally finished, taking a deep breath. 

Hyunjin stayed quiet for a bit before wrapping a arm around Felix, then two, pulling him into a hug. He didn't say anything for a while, and Felix just let himself be hugged for the time being. Honestly, you can never have enough hugs and cuddles in his opinion.

"Thank you for telling me Felix. I'm sorry you went through that. You're really strong, you know?" Hyunjin slowly moved a hand to the younger's head, running his fingers through his hair. 

Felix scoffed softly, almost laughing at the words. "I don't feel like it. I just.. existed through it. Doesn't make me strong." 

Hyunjin pulled back slightly to look him in the eyes. "It does," he said, voice firm and heavier now. "Existing through something like that- that's strength, Felix. Don't brush it off like it's nothing. Many probably wouldn't have been able to bear the pain."

Felix blinked softly, looking Hyunjin back in the eyes, seeing the sincerity in them. "Thank you." he blushed. "But they're not fully gone. Despite all printed images being burnt along with our home, I still have a couple pictures of them on my phone- maybe low quality, but they're there. That's why my phone is so old, I'm scared getting a new one will delete older images."

"That's.. very sweet." Hyunjin smiled, caressing Felix's side with his other hand.

They stayed like that for a moment before Hyunjin's hand moved again, continuing to run through Felix's hair, but this time, brushing a fallen strand behind his ear, letting his hand rest there for a moment, cupping one side of Felix's face.

Felix felt his chest tighten with something strange for a second, feeling as if the air grew thicker- just by a bit.

He realized just how close they were, just a few breaths between them, moving his eyes away from Hyunjin. "I'm sorry for getting mad at you earlier." Felix apologized, hesitantly looking back at Hyunjin. 

"I should be the one to apologize. I just didn't like his hands all over you." Hyunjin said, carefully turning Felix's face to meet his gaze again. 

Felix felt his breathing quicken. "Why is that?" he dared himself to ask.

Hyunjin's eyes practically bored holes into Felix's before shooting down to his lips- just as quickly meeting his eyes again. "I don't know." he said breathlessly, scanning Felix's face. 

Felix parted his lips, wanting to say something, but being unable to find anything, he shut his mouth again. 

He felt Hyunjin slightly move closer to him- him himself feeling like something was pulling him over to Hyunjin, like a invisible force or string, stopping right as Hyunjin's finger caressed Felix's bottom lip. 

"Maybe I just.." he started, voice almost a whisper. "Maybe I just feel the need to protect you."

Felix's felt his heartbeat race just a tack, staring at Hyunjin with wide eyes.

"Even when I don't mean to," he took a deep breath, coming closer. "I can't help it."

Felix didn't say anything, but didn't pull away either, letting Hyunjin slowly press his lips onto his, feeling the softness of them like never before. Had they always been this plush and inviting? So.. soft..?

He sighed into the kiss, hesitantly bringing his hands to Hyunjin's thighs, resting them there, fisting the material of his pants as Hyunjin's other hand found the other side of his face, fully cupping his face, deepening the kiss.

Felix strangely didn't try pulling away, appreciating the warmth of the other, chasing the feeling once Hyunjin pulled away again. 

He opened his eyes, meeting Hyunjin's dark ones, suddenly feeling a jolt in his body. Wait- did he just voluntarily kiss Hyunjin?

He shot up from the bed, standing in the middle of the floor with both hands covering his mouth in shock like some cartoon character getting caught doing something they weren't supposed to. "Fuck- I'm sorry." he muttered through his hands.

Hyunjin chuckled, "For what reason? You weren't the one who insinuated the kiss anyway. You shouldn't apologize." he got up, nearing Felix who stepped away nervously.

"No, I'm sorry- I shouldn't do this with.. sorry-" he scrambled for words messily, going back to leave the room. How stupid of him- he shouldn't do this with his clients or previous clients. They'll just use him for free sex by pretending to be interested in him. It was so typical, and it was his fault.

He unlocked the door, not sparing a second glance at Hyunjin before leaving, wanting to go home- finding Seungmin drinking with Chris in the kitchen. Seungmin noticed him, asking him if he was alright. Well, that's what Felix assumed he was asking. He couldn't hear over the loud music and heartbeat in his ears. 

He just nodded, wanting to go home. He could instead bring Jisung home with him as Seungmin clearly was busy with someone, but to his luck, Jisung was making out with some dude on the couch. Ugh damnit, he'll just go alone. It's not so late anyway. He'll be fine. Just a bit cold, but fine.

Besides, it was better than spending any longer here. He can't believe he almost fell into his own desires- or he means Hyunjin and whatever he was trying to do. 

Felix had gone through it all before. Getting younger clients who pretended to be his friends or lovers to use him as they wanted before throwing him away like some ran-through whore. That wasn't what he was. He didn't want to do this anyway- he just had no choice.

But he wasn't gonna be so naive again. Anyone who knew what his secret job was couldn't pretend to be interested in him romantically and think they could get free things from him ever again.

Including Hyunjin. 

Well, he may not be pretending to be romantically interested in Felix, but still taking him to a room alone to do anything at all was too private and intimate for Felix's own liking. He made a mental note to never let that happen again.

He can't risk further heartbreak or betrayal on his already nearly-fully-crushed heart.

Chapter Text

Felix wrote a quick message to Seungmin that he would be heading home while in the elevator, sending the message and hiding his phone away. "I was getting tired anyway.." he muttered to himself, running his fingers under his eyes feeling them already swell a bit.

I only shed like five tears, I swear if my eyes are swollen tomorrow I'm killing Hyunjin.

Oh, but it wasn't his fault Felix cried.. Whatever- he approached him with the conversation, so basically it could be seen as Hyunjin's fault.

In Felix's mind it was.

The elevator dinged, and out walked Felix, feeling how cold it'd suddenly gotten. It's late August- why is the sky gray? It better not start raining- he has a twenty minute walk home from here.

He wished he'd worn more, taking quick steps until he felt something wet land on his arm. 

"Huh.. probably just the wind.." he hoped it wasn't rain- he didn't want to be sick the next week.

Then another wet drop hit his arm. "Wind.. definitely wind." but then another hit his arm, then the exposed part of his legs, then his cheek- until it practically starting pouring down in the span on 10 seconds. 

Felix saw a little shop with a awning, deciding on running there to stand until the rain stopped, or at least calmed. 

He shivered. The smell of fresh rain was kind of nice- but it didn't feel the same. It felt yucky and cold.

He stood, waiting for five minutes before throwing his head back. The shop wasn't even open, so he couldn't even go inside. 

He heard the sound of raindrops hitting the awning, pursing his lips, trying to hear if it was slowing or stopping. It wasn't- not for a while, at least. Felix turned his head back forward, then to the side, seeing a male approach him. He didn't recognize him, but he was wearing a suit, holding a umbrella above him.

Who the hell wears suits in weather like this on a weekend evening?

The man stopped beside him, putting his umbrella away. "What's a young man like you doing out here all by yourself so late- wearing such a.. revealing outfit?" he asked, smirking. 

Felix took note of his smell of cigarrates and cologne- the way he had little stubs of almost gray beard everywhere. "I was heading home." Felix replied shortly, carefully. 

The man took half a step closer, Felix instinctively taking one away. "It started raining so I'm just seeking shelter here for a bit."

"Oh, you live far from here?" he asked. 

Felix squinted his eyes, feeling how it slowly got darker out. "Not too far."

The man let out a deep breath. "Well, you can come home with me for a bit if you want. I couldn't help notice you from my apartment right there. It's just a minute away- third floor."

Felix felt shivers run up his spine. Had the man been looking at him from his apartment? Was he overthinking it or was he a creep?

Besides, him showing he lives in a expensive apartment, showing up in a suit isn't gonna make him follow him home. He wasn't that desperate for money..

"I'm good, thank you. I'll just wait till the rain stops." Felix smiled, looking away from the man as a sign for him to leave. He didn't though, instead staying, creeping around with him. 

"You don't have to wait with me." Felix announced after a minute, the man smiling cheekily at him. "And you don't have to wait alone. I don't mind." Well I do you bastard, please leave.

Felix sighed, "Okay, well I'll be going home now." 

"It's still raining though, won't you be cold?" He asked, Felix ignoring him, trying his best to cover his arms from the cold rain pouring down on him. At least the air wasn't too cold, still manageable. 

Suddenly he felt a tug on his arm, abruptly turning around, "What the hell?" 

"Come on, you can't walk home like that. Just take the offer and come home with me. Hey, it's nighttime anyway, you must be exhausted. Where'd you come from? A party? Let me offer you a place to stay for the night. No fee- other than a little help with some of my.. personal problems."

"What? I already said I'm good. I'm sorry but I'm not up for that." Felix yanked his arm back.

"Come on. You're out alone dressed like.. that- why won't you just admit a night with me wouldn't be so bad?" The man frowned.

Felix cringed, disgusted. "Your hair is literally turning white- god knows how old you are. I'd rather be killed than follow you home. If you want someone to fuck around with, you shouldn't seek people on the streets, pervert."

"What did you just call me?" The man stepped closer. "How the hell am I the pervert when you go around flaunting your body like that?"

Felix frowned deeply, "What the hell man? I said no, scram off and find someone your own age."

The man reached out and grabbed Felix by the arm, just as a car rolled by. It stopped beside them, window rolled down. "What the hell is going on here?" 

Felix yanked his arm back- now completely soaked by the rain. "This scumbag is trying to force me to go home with him." Felix frowned, going over to the car and peeking in the window. "It's not important, I just need you to bring me home."

"Felix," Hyunjin sighed. "Why would you even run off like that? If I hadn't come who would've known what he would've done to you." he raised his voice so the man could hear him. "Hey old man, fuck off." 

The man stomped his foot and turned around, walking home while shooting glances at the two. Felix jumped in the car when Hyunjin signaled him to, trying not to lean against the seat to prevent it from getting wet.

"I was perfectly capable of handling the situation myself, thank you, but I didn't need your help." Felix said, putting the seatbelt on.

Hyunjin started his car. "You just said you needed me to bring you home."

Felix scoffed, "That was so he'd leave. I could've fought him off if you didn't happen to be here- but since you insist- I'll let you bring me home."

Hyunijn chuckled, tapping some buttons on some screen in his car. "Type in your address."

Felix hesitated, then typed it in, pressed enter, and watched as directions showed on the screen. "Hm.." Hyunjin hummed, "Well that's a nice place to live." 

Felix looked out the window. "Seungmin chose it. He paid for it all in the beginning anyway. His parents are wealthy as well, so they wanted him to live somewhere outside college dorms as they aren't always.. the best. He wanted to rent out a two person apartment because he didn't want to be alone- and I just agreed."

"It's a manageable price anyway when you split it 50/50 with another person. It's not 'cause I'm lying to you about my situation- my original plan was college dorms as well." Felix finished, staring at Hyunjin in a way as if he was trying to convince him.

Hyunjin nodded, "I never said I didn't believe you. I just pointed out it's a nice area to live in."

Felix held back a snarky remark, moving his gaze back to the window. He wondered if the man really would've done anything if Hyunjin hadn't come. Speaking of, why did he come in the first place?

"Hyunjin,"

"Yes?"

"Why where you there anyway? When the man was there?"

Hyunjin took a moment before answering. "Well you left the bedroom so abruptly. I thought you'd gone out to mingle with your friends again, but when I noticed you weren't there and it'd started raining, I figured it was best to try and find you. I didn't expect you to be so close, and I wasn't sure I would find you, but you were just outside. Then I saw that man- some of the- rather wealthy- men here always try to get with either my friends or classmates who come over, so I always know to keep an eye out for them. I think they think 'cause they have money they can have whatever. Especially young vulnerable people like you. Not saying that you are vulnerable, but compared to a strong, tall, older man, you're an easy target."

"Are they known for wanting to sleep with younger people?" Felix finally glanced back at Hyunjin.

"Well- not exactly known for that, but known for stopping every young person who walks past- those who do not live here, of course." Hyunijn said, sounding casual as if it were a every day thing.

"That's weird. How do they know if someone is legal of age or not?" Felix asked. 

Hyunjin shrugged. "I don't think they do. I mean you can clearly tell when someone is 15 and under, but as long as they look 16 or over they go for them."

"Ew," Felix frowned. "That's perverted." 

"I don't think there's been any situation with minors though, so don't worry. Just ignore them next time." Hyunjin kept his gaze fixated on the road. 

Felix's eyes stayed glued to him, until he said: "Bold of you to assume I'll go back." then his eyes shifted to stare forward.

When they did, Hyunjin looked at him, just for a second or two as he still had to drive. "Why wouldn't you come back?" he asked. Felix pursed his lips for a second, thinking of how to answer appropriately.

"I just don't want to." 

Hyunjin chuckled, "Because of.. the old guy?"

Felix shrugged. "I guess." part of the reason was that, then there was also the fact he shouldn't get too connected to his clients. Whether he knew them outside the sex or not, he'd learned the hard way what happens when you do get close to them- and if it happened a second time he'd have no one to blame but himself.

"Well I can also start coming over to your house if we want to hang out. You know a friend of mine did message me the other day. He said you wanted to get to know me better- become better friends or something."

Felix sighed. "Was it Chris? He was at Seungmin and I's place the other day- and we made smalltalk. I think we might've gotten our conversations mixed up a little- or maybe he misunderstood. You seem like a.. good friend, but I have enough." 

Hyunjin kept quiet, then hummed, nodded, before shooting a glance at Felix. "You say that as if you are trying to convince yourself."

Felix shook his head, resisting the urge to scoff, "I'm not."

"Sure," Hyunjin chuckled, "Even if you have enough friends already, one more wouldn't hurt. You don't need to push me away."

Felix rolled his eyes, looking at the raindrops on the windows, how it'd already gotten really dark outside by now.

When they finally made it to where Felix lived, Hyunjin parked outside, following Felix out the car and up to the building. 

Felix shot a glance back at him, "You don't have to follow me up, I can do it myself."

"I know you can, but I want to come." Hyunjin said, hovering around him like a shadow you just couldn't escape.

Felix began walking up the stairs, Hyunjin right behind him. "It's cute here,"

"Mhm." Felix hummed, finally making it to his front door. He unlocked the door, hand resting on the door handle for a bit before turning back to Hyunjin. "Okay. You can go  now."

"This is your home?" 

Felix nodded, "Yup." 

"Oh, well won't you let me in? I'm curious of what it looks like." Hyunjin smiled.

Felix squinted his eyes, scanning his face. "Why..?"

"I've never been here before. I just wanna see. It's so cozy here in the hallway, I want to see the inside of your home. Must be cute as well."

Felix sighed. "It's nothing special."

"Well.. I still want to come in. Maybe you could use some company too, now that Seungmin isn't here."

Felix narrowed his eyes, lightly pressing down on the door handle, but not enough to open the door. "You just want to out of guilt. Because of what I told you earlier."

Hyunjin shook his head. "No. I just want to be around you. I like being around you. Besides you might be scared that the old man comes back- or maybe you'll have nightmares when Seungmin isn't here to accompany you."

Felix laughed, genuinely finding Hyunjin so funny. Now was this a act or was he just unintentionally clueless and silly? "What? I'm not scared, Hyunjin. It's okay- I'm okay."

"It's okay? So you won't mind me coming in?"

"What? I never said that." Felix raised an eyebrow.

"You just said it was okay." Hyunjin pointed out, lips almost pouted.

"No- that was to something else. I didn't say 'it's okay for you to come in'." Felix argued back.

Hyunjin smiled. "Well you just said it now." 

Why does it feel like he's arguing with a goddamn wall or child?

"Hyunjin-"

"Look, I know you are perfectly capable of taking care of yourself, and I won't be overprotective or anything, but I'm just worried about you. If I left you alone now anyway, what would you spend your time doing? I'm just worried you'll end up overthinking something and beat yourself over something you could've never controlled. You might just need some company or someone to talk to, right?"

Felix stayed silent for a second, and just for a split second Hyunjin worried he'd said something wrong.

Felix looked away from him, then sighed, dropping his head. 

Without much thought, he pressed down just enough for the door to open, pushing it open. "Fine. But if you do anything weird or strange, I'm kicking you out." 

Hyunjin smiled, "I wouldn't dream of doing that." 

When Hyunjin said that, he finally stepped inside, letting Hyunjin in as well. "Shoes off." Felix said, toeing his off while Hyunjin untied his shoelaces. "This is it. What you wanted to see so bad." Felix said, going to the bathroom to wash his hands.

"Huh.. it's not bad at all. You made it sound like it was bad. This is nice. It's almost as cute as you."

Felix furrowed his brows. "What.." he whispered to himself, keeping an eye out for where Hyunjin went. 

"That's Seungmin's room to the left there- don't go in, I don't think he wants someone he barely knows in there." Felix said as Hyunjin roamed around the living room.

"So the one to the right is your room?" Hyunjin asked.

Felix nodded, "Yeah."

"Can I go in?" Hyunjin went over to the door, holding the door handle in his hands, waiting for Felix's approval. 

Felix hesitated, then approached him and opened the door himself. "Don't go through my drawers or things." he said, showing Hyunjin his room.

It just had a desk and chair, bed and closet and a small nightstand. It was like a normal room, except it kind of lacked decoration or personality- though he noticed on picture on his desk- a framed photo. "It's cute. What are your hobbies?" 

"Don't have any." Felix said, sitting on his bed. "I don't have money for hobbies, nor do I have the passion for anything."

"Oh, okay." Hyunjin smiled, taking a closer look at his desk. It seemed to be a family photo. Maybe.. that was a picture they took before his parents died. "Well, you have a book here. Do you like reading?" he asked, trying to distract himself from the picture.

Felix shrugged. "It's alright." 

Hyunjin stared at him, silent, before moving to sit with him on his bed. "Well.. what do you then do in your free time?"

Felix chuckled, "I feel like I've answered this before. I work, maybe go out to clubs- also to work- and often spend the rest of the time with my friends."

"Okay. That's fun, time with friends." Hyunjin smiled.

Felix shook his head while holding back a laugh. "Yeah." 

"Well what are you planning on becoming later in life? What are you studying in school?" Hyunjin asked.

Felix shrugged. "In school I'm just taking regular standard classes. I don't know what I'll be later on in life. I haven't really thought so far. Guess I never thought I'd even make it to this age- or even older. I have no passions or interests. I might just get a office job or become a full time pornstar." He looked at Hyunjin.

"That was a joke. They do get paid well though, but despite being able to sleep with people- I can't record it.. I can't imagine just being on the internet for everyone to see like that. That's definitely something I'm not comfortable with. I think I'll just find a office job, but I've also considered becoming a sugar baby. They just have to be like a boyfriend or girlfriend for money. I mean then I'll just be a stay-at-home husband or something. I can definitely consider that. Is that weird?"

Hyunjin shook his head. "No. Being a stay at home mom or dad- husband or wife is completely normal."

Felix scanned his face, then looked away again. "What do you wanna be?" he asked, then remembered. "Oh, right. You're taking over a family company, right? You said you liked art and wanted to do that but that it could be a hobby or something."

"Im surprised you remembered." Hyunjin smiled. "Even Chris tends to forget from time to time, and I've known him forever." 

"Well you haven't told me much about yourself, so it's not hard to remember." Felix shrugged.

"Do you want to know more about me?" Hyunjin looked at him with soft eyes. 

Felix met his gaze, staring for a second. Hyunjin's eyes were honestly very beautiful, cold and intimidating at times, yet when the two of them were talking, they always seemed to soften. It was.. kind of cute.

"No." Felix replied, tearing his gaze away again. "I was just stating you haven't told me much." 

Hyunjin looked dumbfounded, brushing the expression off quickly though. "Oh, right. Well.. you can ask me anything if you ever want- or if you ever need anything, you can also come to me."

Felix was now the one to look at him with soft eyes- yet they carried a hint of confusion and suspicion. "Why? We hardly know each other.."

"I just want to, I guess. You've always seemed sweet and.. I don't know."

A few seconds of silence lingered between them, both staring awkwardly at each other. Or, was it awkward? Felix wasn't sure. It just felt.. different. 

Felix suddenly felt himself blush. It was a little too intense for his liking. Instead he looked away, shifting on the bed. "That's weird." he said, forcing a chuckle afterwards. 

"Is everything I do just weird to you?" Hyunjin asked, letting out a breathy laugh. "You say it like it's a bad thing anyway- caring for someone."

Felix blushed harder. "No- it's just caring so much for someone you just met. It's.. different." Felix chuckled, looking at Hyunjin again- instantly regretting it when he did. Hyunjin was already staring at him, expression unreadable.

Felix was about to look away, but Hyunjin didn't let him. Instead, he carefully put a hand on the side of his face, keeping it turned towards him. "Why do you always do that?" Hyunjin asked.

Felix's eyes moved between both of Hyunjin's. "Do what?"

"Look away. Like eye contact scares you- or you feel the need to hide upon being seen."

"What?" Felix scoffed, eyes moving from Hyunjin's, "I don't-"

"You just did it again." Hyunjin pointed out, making Felix snap his eyes back to Hyunjin- looking at him wide-eyed. Hyunjin's hand felt hot on his cheek, heart now pounding in his chest, heartbeat hammering in his ears.

He didn't know what to say- but maybe there wasn't anything to say.

This isn't good- Hyunjin isn't good.. he should leave- no- Hyunjin should leave- he should ask Hyunjin to leave- but he can't.

"Hyunjin.." 

"Hm?" Hyunjin hummed, hand moving down to hold around Felix's neck instead- just softly- he was never harsh with Felix. His hand slid further to the back of his neck, curling in the hair there so gently it made Felix shiver for a second.

Felix blushed, but was unable to move away. Hyunjin gently caressed his thigh with his other hand, coming closer by the second. Felix instinctively moved a little away- finally mustering up words. "Hyunjin.. we shouldn't do this."

"Hum? What's wrong?" Hyunjin asked.

"I can't.." Felix dropped his head. "I'm scared I'll.."

Hyunjin softly caressed his thigh. "Scared? Of what?" he asked, soft voice.

Of falling in love or getting taken advantage of.

"Just scared.." Felix carefully met Hyunjin's gaze again. 

"I'll be careful with you. I'll take care of you. You don't need to be scared." Hyunjin ran his fingers through Felix's hair. "I promise."

Felix felt something in him break a little, letting Hyunjin come closer, until his lips touched his- and despite how wrong it felt, despite how badly he knew shouldn't do this- he kind of wanted Hyunjin to, just let him because.. something in him encouraged him to.

He didn't like how it felt- it was too good- so good it was horrible..

It was exactly like last time- he knew what'd happen from here. Hyunjin would just betray him- but.. what if he didn't? Would he be naive to not think so?

Hyunjin was also kinder than everyone else that'd ever slept with him before- but does that mean he has good intensions? Hyunjin clearly had no issue just buying him for a night the first time they met, which obviously meant he'd hired prostitutes before, right?

And if ever since he met Felix he has only slept or done sexual things with him- that means he just left the other- possible- prostitutes alone for Felix. How could he know Hyunjin wouldn't just leave him for another prostitute?

But the thing was, what if Felix was the first prostitute he'd ever hired, and Hyunjin had never thrown anyone away ever before?

But then how would he know Felix could be bought for a night? Was his outfit and intensions that obvious? No- they weren't.. right?

He only had himself to blame either way for whatever the outcome was. His job was to get people off, and then leave. He nor his clients were meant to stick around afterwards, and it was just a unlucky coincidence Hyunjin and he went to the same university. 

He sighed softly into the kiss. He should really leave and forget Hyunjin once and for all after this- and he will. But right now, there was nothing wrong with giving in- especially when he wanted this- when, for once, it wasn't just for money and his job.

"God, Hyunjin.."

Hyunjin smirked against his lips. "Yes, darling?"

"I really want this.. I- I haven't done it for myself in so long- but I really want it-"

Hyunjin smiled, picking him up to place him further up his bed, caging him in underneath him. "Are you sure?"

Felix replied by bringing Hyunjin's head down to his, kissing him desperately. Fuck it- I don't care what Hyunjin does after this- I haven't gotten too close to him anyway- I just need this for myself. He can give me what I need one last time before we cut ties.

Felix relaxed into the kiss, despite being tense, despite thousands of alarm bells going off inside him- he couldn't stop. Not when it felt so good and right- but god, why did it feel so right? It wasn't.

Hyunjin's hands roamed carefully, sliding under Felix's shirt, fingertips brushing against his skin, patient and slow. Felix sighed softly into the kiss, fingers curling in Hyunjin's shirt like he was scared he'd float away if he didn’t hold onto something- like he needed to ground himself.

"You're shivering," Hyunjin whispered against his mouth, voice gentle, concerned. He pulled back just slightly, only enough to meet Felix's gaze. "If you want me to stop, say it."

Felix shook his head, maybe a little too quickly. "No- I want this," he whispered. "Just- just go slow like always, please."

Hyunjin smiled, that soft, almost proud smile he always seemed to wear around Felix, and kissed him again, tongue teasing Felix's lower lip until he whimpered, allowing Hyunjin in.

The kiss grew messier, more desperate- mostly from Felix- and when Hyunjin finally tugged Felix’s shirt over his head, Felix didn’t protest. He just let him, appreciating the touch, feeling Hyunjin's hands explore his body carefully, with a slowness that made Felix shiver even harder.

Clothes were ripped off in between kisses, between hurried touches and whispered encouragements from Hyunjin, until Felix was under him, bare and trembling, every inch of his body aching with need- with want.

"You're so beautiful," Hyunjin murmured, pressing kisses down Felix's chest, taking his time, like he wanted to savor him.

Felix squeezed his eyes shut, overwhelmed, unsure how to take being touched like this- like he was fragile, precious. Not just a thing to be fucked and forgotten.

He clutched at Hyunjin's hair, dragging him into another desperate kiss, one that tasted like fear and hope all at once. God, how Felix hoped this wouldn't turn out to be his biggest regret ever.

"Please, Hyunjin," he breathed between kisses. "I need you."

"I’ve got you, baby," Hyunjin whispered, voice thick with affection and something Felix wasn't sure of. "I'll do whatever you tell me to."

Felix blushed, letting Hyunjin's hands carefully find Felix's sensitive areas. "Where's your.. lubricant?" he asked, glancing around the room, despite wanting everything but to take his eyes off of Felix.

Luckily, he was blessed with a good memory either way, so he could always remember how Felix looked underneath him. So vulnerable and small- but so perfect in ways Hyunjin couldn't even describe.

Not even through art- and that said a lot.

Hyunjin was sure if he tried capturing Felix's beauty and perfection on a canvas, the drawing would just end up looking like a jaw-dropping beautiful angel, but that was nowhere near enough to describe and show his beauty.

It was such a pain.

At least he could remember his beauty with the help of his memory. Did Felix know how beautiful he was?

"I don't- I don't think I have any.." Felix muttered, Hyunjin looking back at him with thoughtful eyes. "Hm.." he hummed, tongue poking at his cheek. "I might know a way, if you're up for trying?"

Felix stared at him, not hesitating before nodding. He trusted Hyunjin a lot when it came to sex.

"Okay," Hyunjin smiled. "Can you scoot further up the bed?" 

Felix did, making place for Hyunjin to lie down as well. 

He was hyper focused on Hyunjin's next movements, though he wasn't sure what Hyunjin was doing. He placed one of his pillows underneath his lower back for support, lifting his lower body further into the air.

Hyunjin- lying down- placed Felix's legs over his shoulders, keeping his hands on Felix's sides, caressing the skin there. Felix blushed, noticing the position. It was a little too intimate- at least it felt it. 

Was Hyunjin going to.. blow him?

Apparently that wasn't what he was going to do, as he left his dick completely alone- hard.

He brought his face further down, "Do you know just how beautiful you are, Felix?" Hyunjin asked, puffing out air at Felix's entrance. 

Felix blushed, "Wh-what are you doing?" 

"I asked you a question first. Answer it." Hyunjin stuck his tongue out, licking Felix's rim. 

Felix clenched around nothing- quietly gasping. "Hyunjin- that's not-"

"Answer me Darling," Hyunjin's hand squeezed his side, slowly making it's way to hold over Felix's pec- tracing his nipple. 

Felix only shivered further, squirming a bit before dropping his head, staring at the ceiling through almost blurry eyes. Was he crying? Something about this position just felt so exposing- he felt so vulnerable- and Hyunjin wouldn't tell him what he was doing.

"I don't know.." he whispered.

Hyunjin's tongue continued licking over Felix's hole. "Well, you're the most beautiful person I've ever met, and that says a lot. I've met many people from social gatherings and events hosted by my parents."

Felix nodded, though he didn't know for what reason. It just felt like a appropriate response. "I- I think you're very handsome too.."

"Thank you," Felix could hear from Hyunjin's voice he was smirking- using his non-existent energy to raise his head and look at Hyunjin again. He looked so predatory from that angle, looking at Felix as if he was about to ravish him- like a lion would it's prey.

Felix's whole body trembled, and he held back the whine that threatened to escape him. "What are you doing?"

"Well, seeing as you don't have any lube, we'll somehow have to ease the slide- unless you want it to hurt?" Hyunjin explained, raising a teasing brow.

Felix shook his head. "No.."

Hyunjin carefully rolled a nipple between two fingers, "Then I'll need to use this method to not hurt you." Felix wasn't quite sure what he was doing- but he let him do it. He trusted him. Hopefully Hyunjin wouldn't break his trust so early on in their 'friendship'."

Felix actually moaned loudly when Hyunjin stuck his tongue out again, repeatedly licking over his hole, sometimes sticking his tongue further in- past his rim. Felix felt goosebumps rise at that. It felt so dirty and filthy..

Hyunjin seemed to enjoy it though, humming every time he did it, the vibrations further teasing Felix, sending short jolts of pleasure through him. His thighs trembled a little harder every time Hyunjin's tongue slid in, resting uselessly over Hyunjin's shoulders. His hands clutched uselessly at his sheets- but he felt it grounded him- supported him- even if it didn't.

Felix bit his lip tightly as Hyunjin's tongue reached further inside him, feeling something make it's way further up his upper body. Hyunjin pressed his fingers to Felix's lips, wishing for him to open his mouth.

Felix understood and parted his lips, sucking on Hyunjin's fingers when they slid inside his mouth. Felix whined, feeling Hyunjin press the pads of his fingers to his tongue. "Make sure to get them wet- the outcome will only affect you." Hyunjin said, removing himself from Felix for a second.

Felix took that very seriously, making sure to get every part of Hyunjin's fingers covered in his spit, licking all over them before Hyunjin retracted them, bringing them further down Felix's body.

Felix felt something other than Hyunjin's wet muscle press against his entrance- his fingers. He braced himself for a slight sting, but it never came. Not even when Hyunjin got two fingers in.

Oh. Perhaps the saliva helped and worked as a lubricant. Why had Felix never thought of that? 

Hyunjin curled his fingers up to hit Felix's prostate, and he moaned- loudly- unsuspecting, arching his back. Hyunjin chuckled, not doing the action again until he added a third finger and Felix lightly hissed, frowning.

It seemed Felix always forgot about the pain when Hyunjin pressed his sweet spot, though.

"You taste good," Hyunjin said, extracting his fingers again, now moving up to sit between Felix's legs, keeping both of Felix's legs resting around his own waist, keeping his bottom slightly elevated. 

Hyunjin pushed down his briefs with one hand, spitting on his free hand, slowly stroking himself with it. Felix stared at him with shiny eyes, watching him stroke himself. Hyunjin noticed Felix's own dick twitch a little bit, finding it.. cute.

"Are you ready?" Hyunjin asked, resting one hand next to Felix's head, hovering over him. Felix looked up at him, nodding, as he then brought himself down to Felix's entrance, resting his tip against Felix's entrance for a second before exhaling shakily.

He pushed himself in bit by bit, keeping a watchful gaze on Felix's face while he did so, scared of hurting the younger. 

Felix just had his mouth hung open, eyes shut as he concentrated on the feeling, and god- after being hard for so long- it was really good..

Well.. he felt like everything just felt all that much better when he was doing it with Hyunjin.. It was strange.

He gasped silently when Hyunjin grazed his prostate, hand instinctively finding Hyunjin's bicep and squeezing, just to hold onto something. "Big.. you're big." Felix muttered between gasps.

"Yeah? Did you forget from our previous times?" Hyunjin smirked, not getting a reply from Felix who was too busy focusing on not coming the second Hyunjin bottomed out. "So perfect, Sweetheart." Hyunjin hummed, letting Felix adjust to his size first.

He leaned down, pressing a soft kiss to Felix's lips, softly caressing his hip with the hand not supporting his body weight. "So soft, so pretty, so perfect.." Hyunjin whispered against his lips, pressing another soft kiss to them. "So perfect and all mine- for tonight at least."

I wish you'd be forever, though. 

"Mhm.." Felix agreed, mind quite hazed, drowning in the feeling of Hyunjin all over him. It was so good. So comforting.

"Ready yet, Darling?" Hyunjin smiled, kissing his cheek. 

Felix nodded, finding the softness and care so attractive.. "Ready." 

"Okay," Hyunjin smiled, pulling back out till only his tip was in to push back in, carefully, repeating the action with a steady pace. Felix's mouth hung open, already taking deep breaths.

"Oh fuck.." Felix moaned, head falling back into the pillows, exposing his throat and it's curve in a way it was impossible for Hyunjin to ignore and leave alone. Hyunjin pressed soft open-mouthed kisses to his throat, hips still moving steadily, hitting Felix's prostate with each thrust.

Felix's hands moved to hold around Hyunjin's shoulders instead, clutching them tightly. He felt so hot.

"Feels good?" Hyunjin asked between kisses, voice low and teasing.

Felix could only nod, eyes fluttering as he whimpered, "Yeah.. yes– just don't stop.."

Hyunjin smirked, letting his hand trail down Felix's body again, fingers grazing his stomach and chest- reaching down to his neglected cock. He wrapped his fingers around it gently, pumping in time with his thrusts, drawing a choked moan from Felix.

"Oh fuck!- fuck.." Felix tightly squeezed his eyes, burying his face the best he could in the crook of Hyunjin's neck, at first trying to hold back his many sounds before just giving up and letting out noises he didn't even know he was capable of making.

"So sweet.." Hyunjin said through gritted teeth. "Pretty little thing." he kissed Felix's sweet spot, making Felix jerk in his spot.

"Ah.. huh.. yeah-" Felix wasn't sure what Hyunjin said- even less sure of what he himself said- or more so mumbled.

"Yeah, I'm glad you know it." Hyunjin smirked, continuing jerking him off, licking and biting his sweet spot- leaving a deep purple mark there once he was done. 

Felix was only letting out random mumbles and incoherent sentences by this point, squeezing Hyunjin's shoulders so hard- he might even leave bruises- every time Hyunjin sped up his movements and got a little too fast.

"Oh- god!" Felix moaned loudly- shakily- voice unstable yet still loud. "I think I'm gonna come.."

Hyunjin pressed a kiss to his right cheek, then lips. "Yeah? Are you gonna come for me?"

Felix let out a broken moan. "Yeah-"

"Good. It should stay that way. Only for me, don't you think?"

Felix's brain was too scrambled from all the thrusts to think clearly, not being able to answer- or, maybe he just didn't want to answer.

"So pretty. Cum for me, darling." Hyunjin said proudly, giving Felix's cock one last tight stroke- running his thumb over the tip while perfectly aligning the movement with a deep thrusts right to his prostate. 

Felix hadn't meant to come so soon- but with Hyunjin's actions and words, he just.. did.

White robes shot out from his slit- spurting all over his stomach and some even landing on Hyunjin's hand, Hyunjin practically milking him of every drop, jerking him off till he trembled with oversensitivity. 

"Oh.. ah- Hyunjin-" Felix whined, moving from Hyunjin's touch.

"Sensitive?" 

Felix nodded weakly. "Tired too."

Hyunjin smiled, caressing his cheek with his clean hand- as in the one not covered in Felix's release. "Then it's good I'm not making you do all the work. Not making you ride me, huh? Do you think you can turn onto your knees?"

Felix barely even processed him touching him before Hyunjin gave him yet another request. "Turn around?"

"Yes. Can you?"

Felix took small breaths through his parted lips, not even processing a reply before Hyunjin nodded, "It's fine, I can help." he smiled, pulling himself out of Felix who once again whined- attempting to rub his thighs together- before Hyunjin held his legs in place.

He held him by his sides, pulling him up, turning him around and easily manhandling him onto all fours. Felix blushed, trying to look behind himself when he ended up dropping his head with a loud moan. 

"Oh fuck!" he almost yelled as Hyunjin entered him again, rubbing a soothing hand on his lower back. Smooth comforting circles. 

"You're doing amazing Darling. Just a few more minutes, okay?" Hyunjin spoke softly, leaning down to intertwine his fingers with Felix's, fully trapping him beneath him. He was fully surrounded by Hyunjin.. everywhere.

"O-okay," Felix agreed, just out of instinct. Oh jeez..

Hyunjin pressed a kiss to his shoulder. "Okay. You can always tell me if you want me to stop at any point, remember.." Hyunjin said, setting a quicker pace this time, thrusting desperately in and out of Felix. 

At this point he was fully chasing his own release, not sure Felix even wanted or could come another time. He wasn't sure if Felix had the energy after a party anyway. 

He tightly held Felix's hands beneath his own, smirking in satisfaction when Felix laid his head down on a pillow, tightening the way he felt around Hyunjin. With his whole body lying at an angle with his ass in the air, he also hit Felix's sweet spot with every hit.

He noticed from the way Felix buzzed at every thrusts, mouth hanging open- no sounds escaping yet, though- shutting his mouth every once in a while to prevent his saliva from spilling onto his sheets- though he quickly gave up on that and just let it run out, pooling on his pillow.

It was so gross. He never drooled- and if it weren't for the way Hyunjin fucked him right now, he would definitely have found it disgusting. Right now, though, he couldn't care less for it.

Hyunjin moved one hand to pull Felix down by the hips to meet his thrusts when he felt a knot forming in his stomach, moaning at the feeling. 

"Fuck, Felix- you feel so good. So tight and perfect around me- as if you were shaped to take me. Even this curve on your waist, my hand fits perfectly here. You're just so perfect, aren't you?"

Felix finally moaned again. "Yeah.. for you."

Hyunjin smirked proudly. "That's right, my perfect little fucktoy."

Felix hid his face in his pillow, muffling any sounds that came out after that, Hyunjin continuing to hit his prostate with basically every thrusts, making Felix sob out into his pillow, thighs trembling as he tightened around Hyunjin.

"Fuck, Felix. Are you gonna come again?" Hyunjin asked, feeling himself close as well. "Felix- are you?"

Felix moaned into his pillow, shaking his head- almost as much as his thighs were- before Hyunjin's hand previously around his hips made it's way underneath his face, lifting his face by the jaw. "Darling?"

"Yes- yes.. I am.." Felix cried out, Hyunjin feeling the saliva pooling at his chin. 

"Good." he said, still holding Felix's head up while chasing his release, helping Felix as well. "Doing so good Felix. Keep it up a minute more.."

Felix's thighs shook, ached, but he held himself up- though there was no doubt Hyunjin would help hold him up if his legs gave in- feeling himself just on the edge before Hyunijn spoke again. 

"I think I want you to be mine to fuck for life, Felix."

Felix practically screamed out, coming all over his sheets while feeling Hyunjin paint his insides as well, still fucking him- fucking his come inside him. 

"You'll be mine forever, right?" Hyunjin groaned, Felix moaning in agreement- not thinking clearly. 

Hyunjin smirked, "Yeah. That means you'll be by my side at all times, correct?"

Felix cried out, nodding. "You.. Counts for you too."

Hyunjin hummed. "I know. I'll stay by your side forever, Felix." Hyunjin moaned, still moving his hips around.

Felix whined loudly, "No- god.. Hyunjin- can't take more." Felix cried, feeling something hot run down his cheek. He hadn't even realized he was on the verge of tears before then- too caught up with everything else. "So- so sensitive.."

"I know, baby." Hyunjin wiped his tears. "I know. I'm done now." he gave it a few more seconds, riding their orgasms out before pulling out, watching his load immediately trickle out the smallers hole.

"So good, Felix. I love you so much." Hyunjin said, pressing a kiss to Felix's temple. Felix would've reacted to those words, but he was too fucked out to care at the moment. Besides, he always said 'I love you' to Seungmin, Ji and Changbin anyway.

After what felt like hours, with Felix's ass still in the air- he was too exhausted to move- he felt Hyunjin wipe him down with some wet wipes. "I'll get you to the shower in a second, alright? Try to stay awake." he whispered softly, running the wipe over his hole.

Felix clenched on instinct, blushing afterwards. It was weird how he still had the ability to feel embarrassed at a moment like this.

After a couple of minutes, he felt himself being picked up, getting brought to the bathroom further down the home. Hyunjin turned on the water, immediately running back to support Felix who was desperately holding at the sink counter to not fall- laughing at the situation.

"Your fault." Felix mumbled, furrowed eyebrows.

"Your request," Hyunjin smirked, reminding him of what he said earlier. Felix blushed, looking away again until Hyunjin brought him to the shower, helping him wash his hair and body in there, before taking care of himself.

He wrapped Felix in a towel, sitting him on the couch while he changed his bedsheets, carrying him to his clean bed afterwards.

It was safe to say Felix fell asleep quickly, Hyunjin not even getting the chance to put any clothes on him- letting him fall asleep in the towel, carefully removing it after the younger fell asleep- laughing at his state.

And god, Felix was just so cute. He couldn't help it. He just wanted to ruin him at every chance he got.

He pressed one last soft kiss to Felix's cheek, muttering a short: "I love you, Sweetheart." before getting dressed, turning off the lights in the youngers bedroom, closing the door and sneaking back out to get home. He had a party to take care of, after all.

Hopefully, Minho or Jeongin just didn't let anything too bad happen while he was gone.

Chapter Text

Hyunjin sat in his room- a passed out Chris and Seungmin in a guest room, while Jeongin slept on the couch. The party ended long ago, and everyone- well, for the most part- had been sent home, except for the three still here, but he allowed them to stay.

Actually, he didn't allow Jeongin to stay, but he was already asleep so so be it. 

Though the music had been turned off for 30 minutes or so- actually maybe an hour- or had it been two? He wasn't sure- he'd totally forgotten what the time was, something in his thoughts keeping him up, unable to fall asleep.

He had a image stuck in his mind, not what you'd expect, though. It wasn't of Felix- for the most part, at least- it was rather something else. Something Felix had told him about. Not just his family, but that picture he had framed on his desk. That was his family, wasn't it?

He bit his lip, for some reason unable to stop thinking about it. It was almost as if he felt the need to take care of Felix- like really. The way Felix looked so happy, so young, with his mom and dad and little sister. They were standing somewhere in public, like a amusement park or outside a diner- he couldn't quite make it out as the camera focused on them- not the background.

Something about how young Felix was- and still is- having no mom or dad was hurting Hyunjin. He couldn't imagine losing his mom and dad at 14, only to lose a sister less than a year later.

Hyunjin was a only child, but the thought of having no grandparents, no parents, no siblings, distant family who didn't really care for you, it hurt him. 

He sighed, flipping over his phone which had been laying face down for- he checked the time- 90 minutes by now- why was he so determined on something. On helping Felix. He couldn't..

But- he could gift him something.. Would Felix even appreciate it?

Hyunjin was relatively good when it came to drawing people, and with the help of his photographic memory- he might be able to remember the faces well enough to make a rough sketch for Felix. Would he like that?

He didn't know. He bit his bottom lip, pulling out a page from his sketchbook and grabbing a pen which was just laying on his desk, scribbling a little on the page. Maybe he could try. If it turned out crap- scrap the idea. If it turned out good- he could always give it as a gift.

He wasn't sure if Felix would like it though.. what if he saw it as insensitive- or would it trigger bad memories again? Oh goodness..

...

Felix groaned, throwing a hand over his eyes to shield from the late morning sun shining through his blinds. He couldn't remember much, too tired to even do anything other than turn and bury his face in his bundle of pillows. He attempted falling back asleep, but after five minutes gave up, despite still being tired, he searched for his phone.

He felt a object in the shape of his phone on his nightstand, grabbing it and turning his head ever so slightly to look at the time. It read 11.27 in the morning. What..? 

He forced himself to sit up, trying to remember what happened the previous night. It all felt like a haze, but wait, he didn't even drink much did he? 

Oh right, drinks were involved. A party. That's right. At.. Hyunjin's house, correct?

He groaned, running a hand over his face. He hadn't gotten drunk, so he luckily wasn't hungover, but he still felt ache in parts of his body. It was uncomfortable- especially on his lower back.

Then he remembered. Oh god, he slept with Hyunjin, didn't he..? And not even for money, for his own pleasure. Oh jeez..

He groaned, dropping his head in his hands, letting his phone fall freely on his bed. "No..." he dragged out, practically whining after a few seconds. Why would he do that?! That was so stupid. Hyunjin would probably leave him now- now that he'd gotten what he wanted. A free night.

That's when Felix's head raised again. Wait, where was Hyunjin? Had he already gone home again..?

Despite the magnetic force of his bed trying to pull him back, he fought the urge and got up, noticing he wasn't wearing anything other than his blanket. He blushed, keeping it wrapped around him while he searched for something clean to wear in his wardrobe.

His clothes from the previous night luckily weren’t laying around everywhere- it seemed Hyunjin had put it on the chair by his desk. He sighed, grabbing a hoodie and some sweats, putting on some boxers first- obviously.. dragging himself out his room.

No Hyunjin in the kitchen, no Hyunjin in the living room, and no Hyunjin in the bathroom. It was okay- Felix shouldn't have expected him to be there anyway. 

He wasn't the biggest fan of coffee, so he skipped on making that- instead making some quick 5-minute cup noodles. When done, he sat in silence by the dining table, despite burning his tongue, forcing himself to drink the warm soup afterwards. It tasted alright, so he didn't mind.

Afterwards, he rested his head on the table- god excuse his horrible posture at that moment- thinking. About what? He didn't know. Maybe he was just existing in that moment. 

He let out a deep sigh. 

God I'm so stupid- I can't fuck around like that- literally.

It doesn't even matter. I don't care about Hyunjin. He can leave me for all I care.

But ugh.. He pays so well. I'd rather have him stay around and hurt me but give me money than him to just leave.

Oh my god I sound like a gold digger. I swear I'm not.

Fuck you, Felix- how can you think about someone like that! 

He hit himself in the head in frustration. "I'm a horrible human being. I won't use anyone- I'm not using Hyunjin- am I?" His eyes saddened for a moment.

"Fuck.. I should apologize." he bit his lip.

"For what? He doesn't know what you're thinking. Ugh."

"And fuck!" He said that a little too loud. "I told him about my fucking family.." he whined to himself. Why couldn't he just keep shit to himself- not sleep around for free when he knows he can make a profit from it?

He still has a few million to pay off in student debt- and that's just for last semester.. how was he supposed to keep this lifestyle up for another 2 years? 

He chewed his lip between his teeth. I'm screwed. 

This isn't an excuse to be mad at Hyunjin- though. He probably has his own stuff to do. Heck, if I was Hyunjin, I wouldn't stay around for me either. I wouldn't even have hired me to begin with..

Felix sat in silence for a little longer, suddenly jumping as the front door unlocked. His heart practically fell out his chest as Seungmin walked in- hair all over the place. "Goodness gracious! Seungmin- shit I thought you were in your room."

Seungmin locked the door, throwing his keys somewhere and rubbing his eyes. "I should've been. Despite Chris driving me home- I felt sick the whole way. Remind me to never drink again- ever. And no car rides afterwards- goodness I should've just walked home."

Felix couldn't help but smile a little. "Did you drink a lot after I left?"

Seungmin nodded. "Yeah.. Why did you leave so early anyway?"

Felix shrugged. "Didn't feel like it." 

"Oh," Seungmin nodded. "Makes sense. Don't you have a shift at the restaurant today anyway?" 

Felix froze for a second, then jumped out of the chair. "Oh fuck! I forgot- I didn't even call in sick!"

Seungmin laughed at him, "Felix, I thought you said you'd work every single shift you had this year- wasn't that one of your new year resolutions or something? That you'd even take extra shifts?"

"I forgot- I was so tired I overslept and.. what time is it even? 12?" Felix groaned, sending a message to his boss. 

Seungmin dropped on their couch. "Yeah well, don't even bother going at this point. Just stay home."

Felix sighed. "I was supposed to at least text her I wouldn't make it. I hope it's not busy today- or else it'll just be stressful for my coworkers.."

Seungmin whined. "It's okay- ugh- you'll be fine." he said while stretching his arms above his head, laying like a limp starfish afterwards. "Besides you don't wanna go to work hungover."

"I didn't really get drunk last night anyway." Felix sent a short apology message to his boss, asking if he should still clock in. 

Seungmin hummed. "Well I did. I think I'm going to puke."

"Please don't." Felix chuckled, getting a cup from a cabinet. "It'll be fine. You've survived worse." he filled the cup, approaching Seungmin to hand it to him. "Drink."

Seungmin sat up and took the cup. "Thank you. I think I'll go sleep now though." he said, forcing himself off of the couch.

Felix blinked- once, then twice. "Now?"

"Chris woke me up while I was still sleeping." Seungmin explained, walking to his bedroom.

"Yeah well, he can't quite wake you up if you're already awake, can he?" Felix chuckled, Seungmin rolling his eyes in response. 

"Point is, I'm tired and want more rest. I say you stay home from work today and rest- but maybe I'm just biased at the moment. I wouldn't go out if I were you, but you aren't hungover like me so whatever.. your choice!" Seungmin said, shutting his door, followed by the sound of a quiet thud from the other side- presumably Seungmin falling onto his bed.

Felix tapped his phone, biting his lip while waiting for his boss to respond to his message. 

Felix: Hi boss- I'm really sorry for missing my shift today. Do you still need me to come in or is everything covered? I really apologize. I overslept.

Boss: It's totally fine, Felix. We have a recently hired waitress who's been really good these past few weeks- covering shifts and working extra and everything. Don't worry about it, just try to make it on time next shift- or at least alert me if you won't make it.

Felix: Okay, thank you. I apologize again, have a nice day.

He shoved his phone away.

"So stupid.." He muttered to himself. There goes a few extra bucks for next months pay. What's even worse might just be that he's exhausted- not from the party last night- but from the sex. Now he'd let himself get fucked without pay, and missed out on his shift. That could've been at least 700.000 or something..

He dragged himself to his room, plopped on his bed. What else could he do now..?

Well, he could find another client to sleep with, but it wouldn't make sense..

* First of all, it was only 12. Who the hell has sex at 12 in the morning?

* Second, he was sore. He didn't the energy to spare- but then again, he never did.

* Third... was there a third? He should just do it- at least later in the evening. He can use the time until then to rest a bit. He had to make up for the lost money anyway- but maybe he wouldn't drink. Didn't feel like it.

But he should go. It'd been a couple weeks since he'd slept with anyone other than Hyunjin anyway.

...

Hyunjin roughly sketched a background. It just had some shading and building-like shapes in the back. 

Done.

Or was it done? 

The hardest part wasn't drawing it. It was deciding on whether or not he should give Felix the drawing. Hyunjin might back out now, because would he like to be gifted a drawing of his family whom aren't in his life anymore?

"No," he muttered to himself.

No, he won't give it. It's weird, because they aren't even dating or close or anything anyway.. He'll just discard of it.

But he'd stayed up till 4 to finish it- even worse working on it after waking up again. Wouldn't Felix be uncomfortable seeing Hyunjin so soon again anyway? It'd only been 18 hours or so..

No, you didn't waste all this time for nothing. Just give it to him.

"God.. I'll do it." Hyunjin muttered, feeling nervous for no reason. It wasn't even that big of a deal. Just a drawing. Felix knew it was his favorite thing to do. 

But.. when would even be the right time to give it to him?

...

Putting on some shorts, half the side a skirt, Felix glanced at himself in the mirror.

"That's ugly." Seungmin said, truthfully.

Felix scoffed. "I know- but someone will like it. I'm not wearing it to seduce you anyway, it's for other people."

Seungmin chuckled airily, "Hey, how do you know I won't pay for your service for a night? I might."

"You wouldn't. Don't even pretend." Felix rolled his eyes, flattening out the shirt he had on. "And even if you paid, I'd refuse anything with you."

Seungmin laughed, throwing his head back. "Oh come on. You'd be grateful if you had an excuse to spend the night with me. Luckily, if you ever want to, you can just come to me and ask."

"Oh shut up, Seungmin." Felix scoffed, putting on some jewelry. "I'll go now. I'm keeping my phone on me, and I'll text you whether I find someone or if I'm just heading home as always. I'll see you later," Felix smiled at the younger.

Seungmin who still sat on his bed waved at him. "Alright, remember to go for the older ones- maybe even two. Double the pay." Seungmin winked.

Felix frowned, "I don't think I'll be comfortable in a 2 on 1 position, but we'll see. Love you, bye!"

"See you honey," Seungmin smiled with his eyes, cute as always, and Felix was on his way again. 

He sped-walked to the bar as it was slightly breezy outside- well no shit, he was practically naked, his shirt a tee-shirt with cuts all over. It didn't do much to cover him, but, well, wasn't the point either.

Nonetheless, he rushed to the bar, covering his arms with his hands before he entered. He scanned the area before stepping further in, just to check there actually were possible clients there to start with- or else he'd find another spot.

Luckily, there were quite a few older men there, all laughing with that typical rich-man laugh, a few bottles on their table. Felix smirked, then brushed it off, walking towards the bar to get himself a (non-alcoholic) drink.

He made sure to stand closer to the men's table, purposefully leaning on his elbows, sticking his ass out. He could hear their conversation. Typical business men talk, trade deals and promotions.

"Good evening, could I get you a drink?" The barista asked.

Felix smiled, "Yes please, could I get a.. non alcoholic mojito?" he ordered, feeling the presence of someone else behind him. He didn't turn around.

"You got it," the barista smiled, eyeing the person behind Felix- offering them a smile- grabbing a glass to make the drink. "It'll be 12000 won. Do you want to pay now or add it to a tab?"

"He can add it to a tab, can't he?" a unfamiliar voice spoke, revealing a older man beside Felix. "He deserves more than just one drink tonight." 

Felix eyed him. Expensive watch, suit- might've come straight from a business meeting with those other men behind them- slicked back hair with oxford shoes. Perfect, wasn't it?

Felix looked up at him through batted lashes, smiling innocently. "Well.. are you gonna pay for it?"

"I could," the man replied, moving a hand around Felix's waist. His touch was surprisingly warm, though the metal rings on his fingers were cold. "Put it on my tab." the man ordered, the barista nodding, finishing Felix's drink in just a minute, handing it to him. 

Felix took the drink, looking back at the man with a soft smile, biting lightly at the straw before sucking some of it in- purposefully doing it slowly, letting the cold sweetness hit his tongue.

The man watched him closely, corners of his lips curling up into something between a smirk and admiration. 

Meanwhile, back at home, Seungmin was once again searching for a movie to watch.

"There's nothing to watch these days.." he muttered to himself. "I should become a director. I could make 100 top rated movies that'd keep anyone entertained. Who the hell would watch this shit.."

He scrolled through Netflix. Then HBO Max, then Disney Plus.. when did people stop making good movies?

He let out a deep sigh, hearing the doorbell ring. 

He threw the remote on the couch in frustration- because he couldn't find a movie or show to watch, not because the doorbell rang- and went to open the door. Maybe Felix had decided to come back early?

Instead he saw a nervous-looking Hyunjin there. He raised an eyebrow. "Hello?"

"Hi, Seungmin. Uh, I was wondering if Felix was here?" he smiled, both his hands behind his back. 

Seungmin shook his head. "No, sorry. Felix is out tonight." 

Hyunjin's mouth opened a bit, then shut, before he spoke: "Where is he?"

Seungmin chuckled, "Why would I tell you..?"

Hyunjin moved his hands from behind his back to wave in front of him. Seungmin noticed a folded piece of paper in his hands. "No bad intentions- I was just wanting to talk with him about something, and give him something."

Seungmin still looked confused, almost as if he didn't trust Hyunjin. Well, they didn't really know each other. "I'm assuming that piece of paper in your hands?"

Hyunjin's eyes followed Seungmin's. "Yes, right. I wanted to give him this. It's a.. drawing."

"A drawing?" Seungmin's tongue poked the inside of his cheek, smirking. "That's cute." 

Hyunjin wasn't sure if he was just nervous and over analyzing everything or if Seungmin was mocking him. 

"What's the drawing of?" Seungmin asked, genuinely curious.

"Oh," Hyunjin licked his lips. "It's personal." he answered with a crooked smile, Seungmin giving him a strange look but nodding nonetheless. "I can hand it to him when he gets back later." Seungmin reached his hand out, giving Hyunjin the option of handing him the drawing.

Hyunjin hesitated, but put the paper in his hand anyway. "Do you think you could tell me where he is?" Hyunjin asked.

Seungmin shrugged. "What are you gonna do when you find him?"

"Nothing weird! Just talk." Hyunjin said, wishing Seungmin would just trust him. 

Seungmin hummed, "How do you even know Felix? I've not even seen you two talk at school."

We've had sex a couple times. 

Hyunjin chose the more appropriate answer though. "Jeongin. Both my and Felix's friend." he said.

"Okay. Well he's at a bar somewhere- don't ask me which, I'll not go so far into detail. I think he's.." Seungmin couldn't tell Hyunjin what Felix's secret job was. "He's doing Felix stuff."

Hyunjin knew what that probably meant, but he wasn't sure if Seungmin knew what Felix's secret job was. "Oh okay. Thank you." Hyunjin smiled, Seungmin offering him a little one back before shutting the door again, Hyunjin hearing the lock twist a second after.

Was Felix out fucking around with older men again? Didn't Hyunjin tell him to just go to him if he ever needed money? Maybe he was just with a friend at a bar.. huh.

...

"Thanks for the drink," Felix said sweetly, batting his lashes up at him. "Not every day someone offers to pay for me."

"Mm, well, not every day I see someone like you standing at the bar either," the man responded smoothly, fingers sliding further around Felix's waist, this time letting them rest there with more weight, actually holding him.

He leaned closer to Felix, almost whispering in his ear. "I'd love for you to perhaps come home with me tonight." he smirked, thumb caressing Felix's lower back. 

Felix hummed, sipping more of his drink before turning just slightly closer to him, letting their bodies almost brush. "You know," Felix said softly, swirling the straw with his tongue, "you don't get people like me for free."

"No?" the man asked, clearly entertained, lips twitching in amusement. "And what's the price?"

Felix leaned in closer, just enough for his breath to brush the man's jaw. "Depends. Some just want company, others want something more." His eyes flicked up to meet the man's again, something teasing hiding behind them. "But.. I usually start at seven hundred."

The man raised a brow, a slow grin spreading across his face. "For the night?"

"For you?" Felix smiled, "That's just to talk."

The man laughed under his breath, clearly enjoying the boldness of Felix. His hand gripped tighter around Felix's waist, sliding a little lower to the curve of his ass, thumb pressing gently. "You're greedy, huh?"

Felix leaned into the touch just a little. "No, just know what I'm worth." 

The man chuckled, a deep but rich sound, sending sparks through Felix. "What's the price for.. more, then?" the man asked.

"Depends on what you want. How intimate you want to get." Felix smirked, showing off his fangs. 

The man's hand slid further down his ass, finger almost pressing between his buttocks. "That much."

Felix smiled, "Because of the free drink, I'll lower the price. One million?"

The man licked his lips. "I thought you said you knew your worth.. That's it?"

Felix shrugged. "Maybe you just don't want it?"

The man shook his head. "How long? An hour?"

Felix's eyes roamed the place. "I'll give you 90 minutes from now." 

The man whistled, checking his watch. "Then we should get going soon. I live 15 from here." 

Felix felt a hand wrap around his wrist, but it wasn't the man in front oh him's. He was still checking the time on his watch. He turned in confusion. 

"No you won't." 

"What..?" Felix frowned, brows furrowed.

"I'm sorry, who are you?" The man asked, grabbing a hold of Felix's other arm- not harmfully, but hard enough to not let him go. "I approached him first."

"We already agreed in advance he'd go with me tonight." His expression wasn't angry- Hyunjin never showed anger so directly- but his eyes were cold, jaw tight. Like he was very close to showing something.

"Felix," Hyunjin said, almost in a warning tone.. "Come."

"No. I don't want to."

"It wasn't up for debate. I told you not to do this anymore." Hyunjin clenched his jaw, eyeing the man holding onto Felix. 

The man tilted his head. "Who are you? You can't just take him from me- especially not if he wants to stay."

Hyunjin chuckled, "He doesn't want to stay. He's confused."

"I'm not!" Felix frowned, attempting to shake Hyunjin's hand off of him.

"I'm sorry for whatever he's promised you Sir, but he's too young- you can get in trouble."

The man's hand slid off of his wrist. "What?.. How old are you?"

"No- I'm twenty! I'm not underage! How else would I have gotten in?" Felix looked back at the man who seemed nervous- on edge- uncomfortable. 

Felix shook his head, "I can show you my ID- I'm not a minor!"

"It's alright- I live far from here anyway. You can go home with him.." the man went back to his coworkers, seemingly uninterested in Felix, making Felix pissed off- no- angry. Not at him, but at Hyunjin.

"What the fuck, Hyunjin?" Felix asked, sounding frustrated. "You can't just- intervene like that. He literally paid for my drink."

"I could pay you more than he ever could." Hyunjin said, tone almost.. cold. "Come." 

He dragged him and Felix out the bar, into the sudden cold air. Felix waited until they were outside to speak again.

"You think this is about money?" Felix asked, tugging his arm from Hyunjin.

"I think it's about you letting strangers put their hands all over you in places I-" He stopped, exhaled hard, brushing a hand through his hair. "In places they don't deserve."

Felix blinked, momentarily stunned by the shift in his voice. It was quieter now. More genuine.

"What's your problem?" Felix asked, crossing his arms. "You jealous or something?"

Hyunjin stared at him for a second too long.

Felix almost laughed- almost. "Holy shit. You are jealous."

"I'm not jealous," Hyunjin muttered, looking away.

"Then why are you acting like some possessive boyfriend when you're not? Don't act like you did anything to deserve touching me where they apparently can't."

That came out harsher than he'd meant for it to.

Hyunjin didn't speak for a moment, so Felix continued.

"You act as if you somehow have a say in what I do because I let you buy me for a night or two." Felix sighed, looking almost sad, but Hyunjin knew he was mad. 

"You let me fuck you for free yesterday." Hyunjin pointed out, despite knowing it probably wasn't a good time to do so.

Felix chuckled incredulously. "Are you serious? I wasn't thinking properly. I let you do it because you got me to open up to you- by doing exactly what you're doing today! I thought I wanted it but I clearly didn't. I would never do anything with you if I had the choice. I was just naive, thinking you cared. You clearly just wanted me in my most vulnerable state so you could fuck me for free. You probably didn't even care for my family or any part of my sob story to begin with. I know how people like you are."

"Then- you go on thinking and acting as if you know me and my needs and what I want better than myself because I let you take care of me once. I hate it- I hate people like that- people like you. I've dealt with them before- they're shit to be around!"

"You think you're somehow the savior of my story, make me believe it too- then leave after getting what you want from me. I wouldn't even be surprised if you're just trying to get me out of this job to then leave me all alone with no money because you made me believe you'd stick around taking care of me forever. It's my life, and I do what I want. Maybe I want to sleep with older men! The worst thing is that he wasn't even mean or perverted! He stepped away the second you suggested that I was underage! He was actually very kind unlike other creeps. Do you know how rare it is to find a old guy like that at my age?"

Hyunjin put his hands on his hips. "I'm here, I'm not perverted."

Felix rolled his eyes. "Well I don't want you. My plan was never to sleep with someone I'd see again because this is exactly what would've happened! Don't you realize this is why I always avoided you at school? It's- first of all- weird you think you have all this power and control over me, and second, it's humiliating! You're one of the few at school who have seen me in such a vulnerable state, but that's 'cause I don't like looking those I've fucked in the eyes after doing so! I just want you to leave me alone and let me do my goddamn job. I want to get more clients. I want more money. Not just from you. From several people. If I just rely on you for pay- what do I do when you leave me one day? Then I'm screwed and alone." Felix sighed. "I just want to do my job, Hyunjin. Unless you need someone to fuck and I'm the last person willing on earth, you should leave me alone. Like actually alone."

Hyunjin looked at him, blinked. Once, then twice. "I thought we were fine as friends." 

Felix scoffed. "Where do you see friendship in this? Personally, I don't have sex with any of my friends."

"I.. I mean we could've been friends. I would be fine being friends with you." Hyunjin said, voice now small. Really small. Felix didn't even really notice.

"I don't think we could've been. Friends with benefits or whatever the fuck it's called never works. I know because I've tried, okay? I'm sorry, and I appreciate what you've done for me, but just let me live my life. Let me do what I want."

Hyunjin pursed his lips. "You said you didn't want to sleep around with older men."

Felix forced a chuckle. "Now you care about what I want? You certainly didn't seem to care when you dragged me out of there a minute ago."

Hyunjin stayed quiet, Felix only sighing and dropping his head. "I can take care of myself, Hyunjin."

Hyunjin looked him up and down. "You say that but you didn't even bring any jacket to cover yourself with. You're clearly cold."

Felix was cold, but he wasn't gonna admit that.

"I didn't expect to be dragged out of here. I expected to stay inside in the warmth." he covered his exposed arms with his hands. 

Hyunjin pressed his lips together. "Do you want my jacket?"

Felix's eyes softened at the tone he spoke in. It was so soft and gentle, but that didn't change his mind. "No."

"Felix-"

"And that reminds me- you stole my scarf. I still want it returned."

Hyunjin remembered how he'd taken Felix's scarf that one time in the bathroom stall.. "You should come over and get it yourself."

"Hyunjin. I expect it returned by Tuesday- latest- and I expect it given to me from Jeongin or Chris. I'm not going over to your place again anytime soon- and right now- I just want to go home, because you've ruined my night."

"Felix, I'm just trying-"

"Save it- I don't wanna hear it. I don't like men like you thinking you know me better than myself- acting like you care so you can get free things from me. Tuesday latest, or I'll send Jisung to attack you. Not physically- but verbally- and you don't want that."

Hyunjin sighed, "You're just gonna break off what we had because of this? Because I'm a little 'possessive' when I really just care?"

"Break off what we had? Tell me, Hyunjin, what did we have? And if you're so caring, you surely didn't do much to prove it. I opened up to you about my family and you give me sex in return. Maybe I had wanted it too- but what I would've wanted more was some cuddles and words of affirmation and comfort. I don't think we're compatible, and that can't be changed. You're this handsome, rich kid who chooses to live away from your family because you have the money, and you always get what you want. I grew up poor, live away from my family because they're gone, and don't even have a goddamn say in what I want for myself? We're completely opposite."

If I always get what I want, why aren't you with me already?

"Don't they say opposites attract?" 

"Hyunjin. I'm not messing around."

"I just want what's best for you Felix. One day something bad will happen when you continue sleeping with older men like this!"

"And until then, I'm fine. I'll be appreciating your concern and worry the day something bad does happen, and then start regretting not listening to you- but until then, everything's fine. Everything's okay." Felix said, voice trailing off into nothing.

It was quiet between them for a moment, as if neither knew what to do or say.

Hyunjin didn't meet Felix's eyes, and when he did, Felix looked away, as if he couldn't hold eye contact anymore.

"Return my scarf by Tuesday." Felix finally said, turning on his heels, leaving again. 

Hyunjin took a deep breath when he left, keeping his eyes on him until he was out of sight. This was not how it was supposed to go- not at all.

Felix took his almost-broken phone out, messaging Seungmin that he'd just be coming home.

Felix: I'm on my way home now. Nothing worth wasting my time on.

Seungmin: No one exciting at all?

Felix: No, | 

He bit his lip, thinking of what to type.

Felix: No, I wouldn't waste my time on any of them. 

Seungmin: Aw. At least you have me when you get home.

Felix rolled his eyes, chuckling. 

Seungmin: But in all seriousness, there is something waiting for you at home.

Felix wondered what it could be.. 

...

When he got home, he kicked his shoes off, washing his hands and greeting Seungmin who was watching some dating show. 

"On the dining table," Seungmin said, nodding his chin towards the paper lying on the table, making Felix raise a eyebrow suspiciously. 

Was this a joke? Another one of Seungmin's pranks or something?

He grabbed it and unfolded it, flipping the paper so it was turned the right way up. 

He felt his heart both drop and stop for a second, as if all time froze.

It looked like.. his mom- dad.. sister too? 

It took him a minute of staring to process it- process what he was seeing.

He hadn't even noticed Seungmin calling out for him- because all he could hear was white noise- until Seungmin stood up from the couch. 

"Huh?" Felix asked, looking at him. 

"I asked what it was. I didn't look. It was from Hyunjin and he said it was personal. What is it?"

Felix felt his chest heat up, heartbeat quickening while feeling nauseous. "Hyunjin?"

"Yeah. He also wanted to tell you something apparently. I told him you were at a bar- didn't specify which one though. I don't know, did you bump into him? Did he say anything?"

Felix felt so much at once- he didn't even know how to explain it. It was like a bomb of undiscovered emotions and sensations exploded over him, showering him in something he couldn't escape. 

"I.." Felix hesitated, eyes glaring back at the paper in his hands.  "I didn't see him.."

He wasn't just going to tell Seungmin how he got mad at him, but.. what was Hyunjin going to say if Felix hadn't gotten mad at him?

"Oh. Well maybe at school then." Seungmin smiled, eyes finding the paper Felix was holding, clearly curious. 

"Oh- it's something we needed to do for homework in art class." Felix chuckled, folding the paper away again. "Um.. I'm gonna go shower.." 

"Oh, okay." Seungmin nodded.

What's so personal about art homework..? 

"Maybe we can watch this dating show I found together when you're done showering, then?" Seungmin smiled. 

"Okay." Felix nodded, "We can do that.."

Truth was- Felix wasn't sure he even wanted to.

He was always up for watching movies with Seungmin, but right now- he wanted to speak to Hyunijn. He wanted to lay in bed and think about Hyunjin- about this- about what he might've said.

He wanted to be with Hyunjin so he could apologize.

Was Hyunjin really just caring towards him? It felt so.. he didn't know.

Romantic? Possessive? Annoying? Maybe all?

He sighed, going to his room to put the drawing in a drawer, grabbing some clothes to change into after the shower.

He should text Hyunjin.

He should apologize to Hyunjin.

He should tell Hyunjin the truth.

That he's scared because no one has ever cared or done this much for him in such short time.

That he's scared because he doesn't know what he's feeling.

That he's scared because.. he might be falling in love with Hyunjin.

That he's scared because he's surpressing his own feelings and pushing someone who actually cares away.

That he doesn't actually want him to leave. 

That he wants him to stay.

Chapter Text

Felix felt sick and tired and so so bad the whole time he was watching the dating show with Seungmin.

Despite it only being 10 in the evening by now, he was tired. He wanted sleep- no, needed it. But worst of all, he needed to apologize to Hyunjin.

Putting that much effort into drawing something so special for Felix? He cried in the shower.

He wasn't sure how Hyunjin remembered how his family looked like- if he took a picture of the picture Felix had framed in his room- or if he just had insane memory- but it meant more to Felix than words could describe.

Well that had to be the image Hyunjin drew after anyway, right?

The two were practically identical when he compared the drawing and picture frame side by side.

Felix felt so bad. He was so mean to Hyunjin- "You probably didn't even care for my family or any part of my sob story to begin with. I know how people like you are"- damnit why did he say that? Why did he stereotype Hyunjin who had been nothing but nice to him from the beginning?

Worst part is- he doesn't even think rich people- or rich kids who grew up wealthy- were bad to begin with. He's never thought that, yet he still spat the stereotype that all rich people were assholes at Hyunijn when he couldn't be further from it.

It was his own fault, and he knew it. He was a horrible human being.

He sighed, Seungmin squeezing his arm. "Felix, you've been sighing a lot. Are you good?" 

"Oh- sorry. It's just.." Felix's attention turned back to the movie. "They're fucking and kissing all the time."

Seungmin chuckled. "I would never have sex knowing a camera was on me."

"Yeah.." Felix agreed, spacing out again. He had to find Hyunjin, but how?

Well first he should sleep to even start the next day. "The sooner you sleep the sooner you wake up."

He excused himself to the bathroom, brushing his teeth before hugging Seungmin goodnight. 

Seungmin also went to bed not long after, exhausted but mostly bored, wanting to just lay in bed and watch social media until he dozed off.

That's what they both did. Seungmin having a great time watching reels and reading tweets while Felix stared at Hyunjin's contact name for maybe an hour, thinking of what to message him. He doubted he was having as much fun as Seungmin.

Felix: Hyunjin, could we|

No.. you can't start a conversation like that..

Felix: Hi Hyunjin, I wanted to apologize|

No- more casual.

Felix: Hey Hyunjin, what are you doing right now?|

He bit the inside of his cheek.

Felix: Hey Hyunjin, what are you doing right now? Do you think we could meet and talk?

Felix: Well not right now, but tomorrow? Any day next week? I have some things to say.

He put his phone down, deciding for his own well being to not look at it until next morning.

Hopefully, Hyunjin hadn't taken any of what he said to heart. Hopefully..

... 

Felix hadn't heard back from Hyunjin at all that Monday, which was fine, he might not have seen his messages, or just decided to ignore them- which honestly, were all fair. Felix had been kind of.. rude.

But in his defense, Hyunjin was wrong to just drag him out of that bar as if he fucking owned him or some shit. 

They were both wrong, okay? 

Hyunjin might've been trying to protect or care for Felix- which Felix didn't even understand how would work- but he shouldn't just interrupt whatever he has going on. 

And Felix, he should control his feelings a little better. He shouldn't assume things without further knowledge- but.. how could he protect himself if he didn't cut off people who gave him bad vibes before it was too late first?

Hyunjin was just like the previous guy he slept with and let get too close to him with.

Hyunjin would likely do the same, wouldn't he?

Like Felix said to Hyunjin the previous night, he'll make Felix believe he's staying around and helping Felix just to leave after satisfying his own needs and getting what he wants out of Felix.

Felix dropped his face in his hands. 

"Felix has been acting strange today," Jisung said, chewing chicken off of the chicken leg he'd ordered. 

"I agree." Changbin said, slurping his soda. "Are you alright? Is school already getting to you?"

Felix sighed, "No, I just.. I've not seen.. I think.." he trailed off, unsure of what to say.

Jisung and Changbin shared a look before Jisung dropped his chicken leg in the bucket filled with several more, drying his hands on some paper towel before turning to Felix. 

"Lix, is it about money again?" Jisung asked, Felix frowning in response. 

"No- where'd you get that idea from?" Felix looked between the two others. "I'm doing fine."

Changbin chimed in, "Seungmin said that you missed some shifts at the restaurant, and that he hasn't seen you.. you know, getting money the other way either."

"I have. Well, yeah I missed a shift yesterday, but I have been sleeping with a few people." Felix said, truthfully.

Changbin shrugged. "Seungmin said you tried yesterday to no avail. He hasn't seen you leave for clubs or bars the previous weeks either." 

Felix rolled his eyes. "Seungmin doesn't know what he's talking about. I've gotten a few clients. I just haven't told him every time."

Jisung frowned, "That's dangerous. We all agreed you'd tell us every time you go out those days- in case anything bad happens."

Felix bit the inside of his cheek. "It's safe. Trust me. My client, he's kind- careful."

Jisung raised an eyebrow. "That's what you said with.." Changbin shot Jisung a warning look. Jisung shut himself up. "That's what you said last time too. You have to be more careful. Both with your mental health and physical. If someone hurts you or manipulates you- I don't know what I'll do with myself."

Felix chuckled, "It wouldn't be your fault if I got kidnapped or killed or something.."

"But it would feel like it." Jisung said, looking back at Changbin. "We three- Changbin, Seungmin and I- we agreed to take care of you and protect you. If you get kidnapped or raped then hell yeah we'd feel like it was our fault, because we promised to protect you."

Felix put a hand on Jisung's back. "I'll be fine. That guy, I can trust him. I promise. Besides, that's what I've been so worried about today. I told him we shouldn't sleep with each other anymore, and that's why I'm so worried. I'm doing fine with money."

Jisung frowned, "If that's all, why do you look so worried? If it was your decision to cut off contact to begin with?"

Because 'he's' Hyunjin. Because I think I love him.

"Because he paid me well. That's why I only slept with him alone for so long. He paid enough for me to not sleep around with others. I just feel bad because.. because now I'll actually need to go out and find people myself." Felix lied. 

"Oh, well can't you just tell him you regret it? I mean that's only if you do, but he's probably happy to pay for you again if he wanted to to begin with." Changbin suggested.

Felix sighed. "I mean.. I tried reaching out to him again- but.. I got a little.. something happened last time we spoke and I got a bit mad, and I think he's mad at me too. I'm just a bit stressed. I feel like I should apologize- like we should talk it out better. Then it doesn't matter if he forgives me or not- I don't care- but I just want to talk. How can I approach him? I'm worried I scared him off."

Jisung bit his bottom lip. "You can try approaching him in person?"

Felix considered it. Considered telling them who he even was. Considered telling them he- Hyunjin- went to their school, and that he was stressed because he hadn't seen him all day, and that he was worried he wouldn't even get the chance to talk to him in person.

No.. I can't tell them that. 

"I guess I can try to find him.. But where would he be..?" Felix muttered, thinking.

...

Felix decided to wait till Tuesday to find him in school. 

Hyunjin had to return his scarf anyway, and even if it was Jeongin or Chris handing it to him, he could ask them where Hyunjin was.

But that plan hadn't worked out, because yes, he got his mini scarf returned, but no, he couldnt find Hyunjin anywhere.

The reason for that was, when Chris handed him his scarf, he asked about Hyunjin and his whereabouts, but Hyunjin wasn't even at school. He was at home.

That just made it all so much more complicated.

Hyunjin still hadn't replied to his messages or calls, why was he not answering? Had Felix really gotten to him?

He spent the rest of the day considering whether or not he should pay a visit to Hyunjin- going to his apartment..

"I don't know, Jeongin. I'm just concerned. I hope I didn't hurt him or anything.." Felix whispered, rubbing his eyes.

Jeongin hummed, wrapping an arm around Felix. "We can go home to him after class if you want. I'm sure whatever happened wasn't too serious. He's probably just been busy. You know, he has to go to Japan for some meeting in a week or so, right? He's probably just talking with his parents or discussing his upcoming schedule."

Felix almost scoffed, "A meeting in Japan? So casually?"

Jeongin shrugged. "Everyday activities for rich people I guess. He's probably packing. He doesn't like doing it last minute, so if you visit him any day within this week he'll likely be at home. I can tag along with you if you'd prefer that. I mean if you just want to talk I'm sure he'll let you in. I can just wait outside."

Felix chewed his lip nervously. "Does he like when someone shows up unannounced?" 

Jeongin pursed his lips. "Well.. he's used to it. His parents, managers or his company friends show up whenever it fits them. If anything he'll probably be glad it's you and not business people showing up." 

"Hm.." Felix thought. "Should I try and go?"

"Definitely." Jeongin nodded. "If you're really desperate, go for it- and even if you're not, but just want to talk, go and talk. It won't happen if you both avoid reaching out."

Felix whined into his hands. This was so stupid. He shouldn't act as desperate as he is. He just wants to talk, but it's taking a little more effort than he'd expected..

"Okay. I'll go then.." Felix decided, Jeongin smiling. 

"I'll tag along." 

Felix smiled. "Yay," he said although he didn't feel so yay. He felt bad but also weirded out. Why was Hyunjin acting that way- ignoring him.. Was it not him who started it all anyway..? 

Felix brushed the thought aside and went to his last class. It was a relatively late class, ending at 5, so when he finished, he immediately rushed to find Jeongin so they could get to Hyunjin's place rather early on than later.

Jeongin drove the two of them there, parking outside the apartment complex where Hyunjin lived and rang the doorbell.

Ding.

...

Nothing. 

They tried again.

Ding.

Felix furrowed his brows, looking at Jeongin. "Do you think he's not opening because he can see me on the camera?"

Jeongin shook his head, "No. He usually opens or at least asks you what you're there for via the speaker. He must not be home."

"Not be home?" Felix frowned. "Where else could he be?"

Jeongin pulled out his phone, tapping through his contacts. "I don't know.. but I think he might have his location on."

Felix forced a chuckle. "It feels like we're stalking him."

Jeongin smiled. "Maybe we are.." he zoomed in on his phone, showing it to Felix. "But we found him. He's here."

Felix raised an eyebrow. "At the club? On a Tuesday?"

Ignore the fact he's gone to bars and clubs multiple times on a school night for money- but Hyunjin was there to drink, wasn't he? That seemed odd. Getting drunk on a school night.

Well, it wasn't as if Hyunjin had shown up to school the previous two days anyway..

Maybe Felix could play it off as if he was searching for a client so it doesn't seem strange he's coincidentally at the same place as Hyunjin.

He smirked to himself. "Thanks Jeongin. But I think I'll leave him be for today then- won't disturb him if he's partying. I'll swing by tomorrow instead. Thanks for the help though." he offered Jeongin a sweet smile.

Jeongin nodded, an eyebrow raised. "You sure? I can just call him up and tell him to go outside for a minute or two if you want."

"No it's fine." Felix smiled. "I'll just go back home. Thanks for the help though, I'm sorry I inconvenienced you- do you think you could give me a drive back home?"

Jeongin observed his face for a second before smiling back, nodding. "Okay. You'll have to give me your address though- I don't remember it." 

"Will do," Felix smiled, jumping back in the car as Jeongin drove him home. 

He wasn't actually going to find a client for tonight, but he just needed to- somewhat- dress the part to look like it incase Hyunjin saw him. Then he can play it off as a coincidence and have an excuse to talk to him.

Hopefully it would work. 

It had to work- or else he'd be finding himself back at Hyunjin's place tomorrow like a desperate ex.. couldn't happen..

When Jeongin dropped him off, Felix hugged him- as well as he could in the car- goodbye, rushing up to his room to change. 

He saw Seungmin and Chris cuddled up on their couch while walking past, smiling sweetly at how adorable they looked before bolting to his room.

He didn't bother doing much, just shorts and a glittery top with black leather shoes and a black leather jacket, finding it good enough, throwing some silver glitter on his eyelids and leaving. If he takes too long, Hyunjin might leave before he even gets there.

It was around dinner time now, so many were probably leaving to eat. 

Hopefully Hyunjin didn't plan on leaving.

Felix snuck past Seungmin and Chris and walked as fast as he could in those uncomfortable shoes to the club, flashing his ID to the security guard out front and squeezing his way in. 

It wasn't too packed, but there was a handful of people there. Enough people to not be able to see more than 3 to 4 meters ahead of you. It was mainly younger people there though- probably from other colleges or even his- so there wasn't anything to complain about.

He'd rather be surrounded by people his age than older men.

Or.. well, would he? 

Whatever- not important right now, he had to- somehow- find Hyunjin among all these college students.

Goodness, this could be hard- especially with people dancing and constantly moving around- confusing you on whom you've already checked and haven't yet.

Felix stood in front of the bar, eyes roaming the place.

The lounge chairs were occupied by girls. Hyunjin definitely wasn't there.

The bar had rather older people sitting, so Hyunjin wasn't there either. 

Felix decided not to check the bathroom- yet at least- because there's nothing exciting in there. Hyunjin was definitely the type to be out here dancing if anywhere.

Dancing- did Hyunjin like dancing? He danced at his party- didn't he?

Felix shifted his attention to the crowd of people dancing and rubbing their bodies against each other.

Hyunjin, Hyunjin, Hyunjin.. Where are you?

Then his eyes stopped, froze on a person with their back turned. Felix squinted his eyes. Hyunjin? He kept his eyes on the male, maybe looking creepy to anyone looking at him but he didn't care.

He observed as the man moved slowly, turning and holding around a smaller figure. It looked like Hyunjin. The hair, the style, the body.

Then, the man revealed his face. Hyunjin. 

Felix smiled brightly- something he hadn't done in a long time- maybe even blushed a little- but it all went away as quickly as it came. 

In front of Hyunjin was a shorter boy. Baby pink hair, styled similarly to Felix's- except for the color- a black dress which was way too short for Felix's liking, black boots and dark eye makeup.

What? Was Hyunjin seriously entertaining himself on.. that?!

He almost laughed out loud. Come on, Hyunjin. Do better. 

But it once again didn't last long. Hyunjin leaned down and whispered something in his ear, Felix could see the way the boy smirked and pressed his bottom towards Hyunjin. Hyunjin tightening his grip on the boys hips and moving one hand down to his own pocket.

He pulled out a bill- Felix couldn't see how much- handing it to the boy. 

He whispered something else and the boy's eyes lit up, turning around to face Hyunjin and whispering something back in his ear, all while Felix just stood there and watched like a idiot. 

No way Hyunjin was paying for a night with that. 

Wait, Felix.. keep yourself in check- why are you being so mean to a stranger. It's rude..

Hyunjin intertwined his fingers with the pink heads', pulling him off of the dance floor.

Yeah no, fuck that twink. 

Felix watched as Hyunjin dragged him towards the exit of the club, not even noticing Felix, both leaving with wide grins on their faces while Felix just..

Just heard the music turning into distorted sounds as the seconds passed.

Just felt his heart clench a little in his chest.

Just realized that.. Hyunjin, he really wasn't that interested in Felix. Had he been, he wouldn't have just found another person to fuck when Felix had been trying to reach out to him. Felix, he was just a body to Hyunjin, a body to use a couple times.

Hyunjin could easily replace Felix, and that's what he was actively doing as Felix's legs stood glued to the floor.

The worst part was that it was his own fault. He knew what kind of person Hyunjin was- knew not to trust him- knew that he'd do like the others- but for some reason he still believed.

Believed that maybe he was wrong.

Believed, that maybe Hyunjin could be the one to heal his broken heart.

But he shouldn't have believed Hyunjin's words and lies about sticking around. It shouldn't have surprised him. 

Hyunjin left just like everyone else always did.

It was only a matter of time anyway.

Chapter Text

Waking up in the morning was never really easy for Felix- and today was no exception. If anything, it was harder than usual.

He'd slept for probably 13 hours straight now- from when he got home last night till now. 

What's even worse is that he's still tired. That he wants to fall back asleep again.

Well he wasn't really sure if he was tired or just didn't want to be awake with everything that has happened these past few days. Sleeping would be the better option. Whether he was dreaming or not, he'd not be buried in his own thoughts like he was now, he'd just be sleeping. Peacefully.

But he didn't think it was possible to sleep any longer. Sure, he was exhausted, but how was he supposed to fall asleep after being a little too well rested- when he was wide awake?

He stared at his ceiling above him. It was all white. His room really lacked color, but they rented this place, so he couldn't even do much to give his room personality. It was so boring in there, just like his life.

"Oh what am I doing with my life.." He muttered, blinking slowly. 

What was he doing with his life? Letting himself be heartbroken by a random asshole he'd known for no more than a month or so?

Well it wasn't his fault Hyunjin seemed so sweet and was so hot and attracting...

But he shouldn't let a random nobody who he'd never even dated get to him like this. Hyunjin didn't care about him, so why should he care about Hyunjin? That's right. He shouldn't. 

He rubbed his eyes, trying to sit up to get out of bed, but he failed. He fell back onto his back, limbs spread like a starfish.

He ultimately gathered enough energy and strength to roll out of bed, suddenly lying on the floor like a ragdoll instead. 

Should've stayed in bed.

"Uh..." he groaned, staying still for a couple minutes before furrowing his eyebrows and pushing himself onto all fours, crawling to his closet to put on a sweatshirt over his tee shirt. He was cold. Probably from laying on the floor. 

Okay, maybe that was my fault.. 

He threw on the shirt, forcing himself up on his legs to go to the bathroom.

The house was empty, and so so quiet. He hadn't gone to school that day. He didn't want to.

Seungmin had, though, along with his other friends, so he was all alone until Seungmin came back. He didn't tell Seungmin, Jisung or Changbin about anything, so they probably wouldn't even comfort him- because in order to do that- Felix had to tell them the embarrassing truth.

Yeah, not happening.

He didn't need anyone to comfort him anyway. He'd learned how to deal with things like this alone years ago, so one more silent suffering was nothing.

Let a week pass and he'll be over all this anyway.

Today he could just rest. Binge watch shows on their tv and eat.

That sounded like the dream anyway, so he'd never complain.

Quickly washing up in the bathroom, avoiding his reflection in the mirror as well as he could- please spare him from that horrendous sight- he fell on the couch, turning on some random found-footage horror movie.

He liked found-footage, okay? It was always so good yet nerve-racking.. kept him on the edge of his seat every time.

Except this time he was lying in the middle on his couch. Still, nerve-racking.

It didn't take long for Seungmin to come home anyway- he barely just finished his movie- because he'd forgotten how long he actually slept for, and thought it'd be at least five hours until Seungmin was home.

Turns out it was only 1 1/2..

He appreciated the company anyway. Seungmin was scrolling on his phone while Felix searched for another movie. His presence was always nice, even when they weren't doing much together, just the knowledge Seungmin was close cheered him up.

"Anything exciting at school today?" Felix asked, turning up the volume of the tv as he'd found a series to watch.

Seungmin hummed, "Mm.. no, not really. Classes were boring today- at least mine were. I just had history, a shitty reading test where I had to read for like 2 hours straight- can you believe that? Anyway, then I had math. It was boring. So boring. Lunch wasn't even good. It was just egg fried rice, but it lacked flavor."

He continued: "Chris wasn't at school either, and neither was Changbin. I feel like no one was there today. Maybe it was just boring 'cause I was stuck with Jisung all day. Anyway, you should come tomorrow. I don't wanna be with Ji alone ever again. Did you do anything fun at home?"

Felix took a second to process what he'd heard. "Oh, uh- no, not quite. I'm just tired honestly. I can't be bothered doing anything other than.. well.. this. I've just watched tv all day- and slept till like 1 in the afternoon.."

"Oh wow," Seungmin chuckled. "Did you stay up late last night?"

Just the mention of last night had Felix chewing his lip nervously. "Oh, well not that late, but I think I've just been a bit sleep deprived recently."

Seungmin nodded, hand finding Felix's hair to pet it. "I get it, it's alright. You should get some rest before your shift at the restaurant later today, then."

Felix dropped his head. "Shift?.." he groaned.

"Yeah, don't you have one today? I thought that was your schedule." Seungmin asked.

Felix whined. "I think I do. I can't be bothered right now, though." 

Seungmin hummed. "You can take a day off, I'm sure it's fine."

Felix considered it. "I missed my last shift too, though." 

Seungmin put his phone down, looking at Felix. "You've worked around 200 shifts straight throughout the last two years, though. I'm sure two days off are fine. You deserve a break."

There were a couple seconds of silence before Felix spoke again. "I'll ask, because there's still an hour till my shift starts, so if I need to come in I still have time to prepare." 

"Good idea." Seungmin said, gaze turning to the tv, watching the show Felix put on.

Felix: Hey Boss, do you think I could take the day off from work today? I've been a bit exhausted.

Boss: Felix, didn't you miss your last shift too?

Felix: That wasn't on purpose- I apologize- I've just been tired today.

Boss: It's taking money from your paycheck, you know?

Felix: I know, I just haven't had the energy recently.

Boss: Okay, but try to come Friday, alright? It'll be a busy day like always, and although our new waitress is amazing- she'll need help. I think you two can get along well.

Felix: Okay! I'll come Friday, thank you!

Felix threw his phone across the couch. "Okay, I can skip today." 

"Yay," Seungmin cheered. "Then we can cuddle and watch movies until the sun sets."

Felix scoffed, but moved closer to Seungmin nonetheless to cuddle up against him. The only bad thing was the Friday shift. Fridays were always so busy.. ugh.

...

Setting the table after yet another family left was really draining the remaining energy left in Felix- how come it'd only been an hour? What do you mean he has three to go? Was the clock behind? Hopefully..

"Here, I'll help," Mia, the new waitress smiled, helping Felix lay menus and cups out. Their boss was right- she is really sweet. 

"Thank you," Felix smiled, holding back a yawn.

"Long day?" She asked.

"Long week- of doing nothing yet so much. I'm just tired of it all, honestly."

She smiled, "I get it. I just started college this year, you know, and I'm already stressing a bit.. It was honestly hard finding friends, and moving my things into the dorm? Goodness that was too difficult. You're in your.. second year, right?"

"Correct- but you get used to it. You'll find wonderful friends, and class becomes more bearable. Or maybe it doesn't.. maybe you just start to sleep through all classes like everyone else does.."

Mia laughed, "That's great. Speaking of sleep, I can feel I'll drift off if I don't get moving.. I have a family to assist." she smiled, patting his back before moving back to help her table. 

Felix sighed, helped seat a group of 15-16 year olds- hopefully they wouldn't cause issues- and took their orders.

First were the drinks, then the meals, then dessert- a second round of dessert- then they talked for a bit and left. 

"Finally," Felix exhaled exhausted. That must've been at least an hour, right?

Wrong, he still had two hours and twenty minutes left.

He cleaned and set the table, dragging himself to the staff bathroom to sit for a bit. He just needed a little break. Besides, you couldn't sit on the cold hard toilet seat for long before your butt started hurting anyway.

He didn't have his phone on him, staring at the door across from him for around five minutes instead.

There wasn't much on his mind, just that he hated school, hated prostitution, and hated fucking Hyunjin. 

Both literally and.. whatever the opposite of literally was.

He hated how good it had felt. How good Hyunjin made it feel.

How easy it was to forget it wasn't love they had going on.

Maybe that's what made it worse.

Not the fucking itself, but everything that came with it. The closeness. The eye contact. The goddamn pet names- it was too much. Too much for something that clearly meant so little to Hyunjin. And now Felix was the one stuck with all the leftover feelings- right?

There was no way Hyunjin could still be thinking about him at a time like this- after purposefully ignoring his messages and fucking another person just the other day, right? Hyunjin had to go to Japan anyway- Jeongin told him- so if anything, Felix was probably the last thing on his mind. 

He ran a hand over his face, just then noticing a spider in the corner of the stall, frowning as he decided he'd been resting long enough.

"Whatever, I have a shift to focus on- not this bullshit." Became Felix's mantra the remainder of his shift anytime Hyunjin crept back into his thoughts.

Hyunjin wasn't allowed to stay in Felix's mind when Felix clearly wasn't in his. 

...

As the days passed, the more hope slipped from Felix's heart. 

He didn't know why he was the way he was, but he always hoped that maybe something would happen. That maybe, Hyunjin would reply to his messages- that maybe he'd wake up and find Hyunjin in bed next to him- or that maybe, Hyunjin would apologize to him with a big hug, and Felix would run into his arms and they'd live happily ever after together in a home far from the city with no one to disturb-

"Felix?" Jeongin called out.

Felix's eyes shot up to meet his. Right. Why was he like this? Thinking about a nobody when he had a caring friend in front of him.

"So how'd it go with Hyunjin a couple days back? Ever get the chance to talk to him?" Jeongin asked, scrolling on his phone.

"Oh," Felix fixed his slumped posture. "No, not quite. I was thinking of just forgetting about it- it was nothing anyway."

Jeongin put his phone down. "Oh? Are you sure?"

Felix nodded. "It was random stuff anyway, not that deep."

Jeongin squinted his eyes, as if he didn't quite believe Felix. Then he shrugged. "I mean if you say so- but I think Hyunjin would like to talk out any issues you have- if you still have any. He's always been that type. I think he's on his way to Japan, though. That business meeting we talked about a couple days back."

Felix- despite everything that'd happened, despite knowing he shouldn't feel the way he did- felt his heart shatter a bit. There was no way he'd ever see Hyunjin again. Well it should've been obvious from the start. A rich college student like Hyunjin? Take a interest in a poor student like Felix? It was almost ridiculous thinking back on it.

All the hope Felix for some reason carried in his heart.

Hyunjin was just a really good liar. 

How could Jeongin say he was one to always talk things out? He had been silent for days!

Felix didn't have any unique qualities in him. Didn't have the money- the time- the looks- not even the personality. He was honestly so very boring..

"Yeah, well, there was some confusion from my side. I just misunderstood something about him." Everything about him. "It'll be fine. I'll let him enjoy his trip in Japan without reaching out about issues. I know for a fact I'd hate being contacted on vacations." Not that I'd ever travelled outside of South Korea anyway..

"Alright, but you always have the opportunity, just keep that in mind." Jeongin smiled, toying with the pop-socket on his phone case. 

Felix stared at the pop-socket. A red apple on his beige phone case. Jeongin- are you lying to me? Hyunjin hasn't answered any of the shit I've sent him.

Was it my fault, though?

He thought back on what happened that night they last spoke.

"I hate it- I hate people like that- people like you. I've dealt with them before- they're shit to be around!" 

Oh.. he did say that to Hyunjin..

"Unless you need someone to fuck and I'm the last person willing on earth, you should leave me alone. Like actually alone."

Oh.. he did also say that right to Hyunjin's face. Not only said it- yelled it.

"Shit," he muttered under his breath, face falling into his hands. 

"What?" Jeongin furrowed his brows.

Felix pursed his lips. "Sorry, remembered I need to pay rent later tonight."

Jeongin narrowed his eyes in suspicion. "Okay.." he seemed to get less and less convinced as time passed. Maybe it'd just be best if Felix left their meet-up for now.

"I should get going anyway, thanks for meeting today! We should arrange something else another time!" Felix smiled, getting up from his chair and swinging his jacket back over his shoulders.

"Definitely! But- I think it's raining right now. Don't you wanna wait till leaving?" Jeongin asked, also getting up from his chair- though hesitantly.

"Oh," Felix stared out the window of the café they were in. It was raining quite a bit, but nothing he couldn't survive. "No, I brought my rain-coat, I should survive." Felix smiled, referring to the coat he just threw over himself.

"Alright, I think I'll stay in here till it calms. I'll see you next week- then? In school?" Jeongin smiled.

Felix gave Jeongin a little hug, "Yup, bye!" he said, then left, zipping his jacket fully up and throwing the hood over his head before stepping out into the pouring weather. Surprisingly, it was still hot- just an inconvenience it was raining.

He kept his hands in his pockets the whole time, walking with his head down to avoid rain hitting his face. He was just focusing on not getting too wet- not noticing the familiar car passing him.

...

"The plane leaves in two hours- I don't appreciate being late, Hyunjin." his mom said from beside him in their car.

"I know, mom. I apologize- I just forgot where I placed my passport." Hyunjin kept his gaze out on the rain filled streets, admiring how some people were wearing tee-shirts, and how some actually dressed appropriately for the weather.

"You should always remember where you place it, son. You'll be travelling a lot when you take over our business later in life." His dad spoke from the passenger seat. Hyunjin carefully rolled his eyes. As if.. 

His parents probably wouldn't approve of what he actually wanted to become later in life. A artist. They found it rather funny, as if it were a joke. 

The only person who actually encouraged him to pursue his dream career was.. Felix, really.

But he hadn't spoken to him in a long time. He'd annoyed Felix- practically bringing him to tears. 

He'd just tried being nice, but Felix was independent, and Hyunjin shouldn't have tried to help as much as he did. It came off as controlling rather than a kind gesture. He should work on that...

He sighed, leaning his head against the window of the car.

He noticed his mom shaking her head at his sigh, "Hyunjin, we're just saying. Always have your passport somewhere visible. We can't afford to miss this flight."

Hyunjin held back a chuckle. "You could just get a private jet- on as short as a one hour notice if you wanted to. I didn't mean to delay our leave- but I think it would've been fine if we missed the flight."

"It's still money wasted." His mom said.

"Mom, you spent 3 million won the other day on a massage and face mask or something." Hyunjin quietly muttered back.

His mom rolled her eyes. "It was a spa day- I deserved it." His father nodded from the front. "And it's not just like the 5000 won sheet masks from the grocery store. It's real beauty treatment."

Hyunjin nodded, though he still felt that amount of money for beauty was excessive. "Right.. I'm just saying.." he sucked in a breath. "But I'm sorry- I've just been a bit bothered recently."

His mom rubbed her hand on his arm for a while before letting go. "College stress? I know it gets hard the further in you get." 

No, mom. Honestly, I've been stressed about losing someone I was starting to grow feelings for for being too protective- and now I can't even fuck out my fucking problems because no one feels as good as him.

"Yeah, school." he replied instead. He figured it was the more appropriate answer. 

"It's alright. Maybe this will bring your mind off of college- instead you can focus on how to attend meetings for the future! Just like your dad." His mom said cheerfully. Hyunjin rolled his eyes, gaze still fixated out the window.

A business meeting about stuff he didn't care about being more interesting than hanging out with his friends all day- excusing it off as 'college'? Yeah right. 

Suddenly, passing through the rather cramped parts of the city- he noticed what appeared to be a familiar blond walking through the rain. He straightened his posture, looking out the window- but with the speeds their car was going in- also considering they were going in opposite directions- the blond was soon gone again- out of his sight.

"Wait- mom- can you stop the car?" Hyunjin quickly asked, looking out the back to keep an eye on who had to be Felix.

"What? Why? We're already running late." His mom frowned.

"I think saw a friend- I have to talk to him really quickly."

"No, son. We're tight on time." his dad cut in, not even bothering to look back.

Hyunjin scoffed. "It'll take me a minute!"

"Hyunjin, you can just message him." His mom said, looking him in the eyes. "It works just as well."

Hyunjin almost felt bad, his mom was always trying her best- but sometimes she was really annoying. Always in the worst times. "Mom, we-"

"No, Hyunjin. You have your phone. Besides we're far from where we were before anyway by now."

His mom was right. Now he couldn't see Felix anymore, they'd driven too far from him to still be in his line of sight. He furrowed his brows. Should he message Felix? He had rarely messaged Felix to begin with- and then after a time like this? When Felix had strictly told him to not reach out and to leave him alone?

Felix would kill him if he tried reaching out again. He can already hear it.

"I told you to leave me alone, Hyunjin! Why don't you listen?" 

"Hyunjin, can you stop acting like I owe you something? Leave me be, please."

"What have I already told you? I'm happy now that you haven't spoken to me in days. It's like before I met you, nice and peaceful."

No, Felix wouldn't text that last one.. but the first two? They were possible replies he'd get from Felix. Well- apart from assuming Felix would just block him- had he not already blocked him by now.

Hyunjin hadn't really checked his messages recently, first off, because they were filled with his schedule and meetings in Japan- and second- because he was getting messages from every girl on campus wanting to fuck him. He couldn't even delete all their numbers- let alone figure out where they'd gotten his number from.

Oh, right. On his parents' website. 

But their numbers were for professional reasons. Not.. girls.

He hadn't even gotten the chance to see if maybe Felix reached out to him... 

Stupid, why would Felix reach out after telling Hyunjin not to reach out himself?

But maybe? 

No. 

Well- there was a chance..

No.

Don't be stupid, just look to check- just in case.

No. That makes you look desperate.

But.. what if I am desperate for Felix? I might be.

Don't be- you can get anyone you want. Felix doesn't want you- so you shouldn't want him.

Ah, fuck it! I do want him and there's nothing wrong with that. 

He unlocked his phone- then shut it off. Unlocked it- shut it off again.

Scrolled to find the message app- then went on instagram instead. 

Found the message app- hesitatingly clicked on it. 

Got told to put his phone away because they arrived at the airport. 

Checked their bags in- rushed as they were- might've been his fault...

Unlocked his phone- had to rush through tsa first- unlocked it again- got dragged to their gate by his mom.

When they finally arrived, they immediately got on the plane and found their seats. 

Hyunjin checked his messages. Filled with random numbers and customers and his business friends and family and family friends and-

Felix? 

Was he seeing correctly? 

He checked what Felix had sent him. It was quite a lot- from long time ago? Shit! What had Hyunjin done?! 

"Hyunjin, darling, shut your phone off. Airplane mode- remember? You can't text." His mom said quietly, Hyunjin lowering his phone involuntarily. 

It was fine. A Seoul to Tokyo flight took no more than a couple of hours.

He just had to hope Felix could wait another hour or two for a response.. not that Hyunjin already hadn't ghosted him for days.. on accident- though!

...

Felix had forgotten he had another shift again that evening. He just had so much on his mind- he forgot about work and school.

In school he just rushed through the work, then slept, occasionally even skipping lessons. 

He still studied and got his work done, but he didn't put much effort into it. It was only October now anyway, it wasn't as if they had any important exams anytime soon, so most people didn't attend classes.

To be honest, Felix praised himself for even showing up. That was more than some people did.

Sitting in the chair by his desk, his head rested on the cold material of the wood. He wasn't supposed to skip work so much, but it'd happened thanks to the events that'd taken place over the last week or two.

He hadn't even been out to the club recently either. Not after seeing Hyunjin with that other guy. He was just unmotivated after that sight- especially because Hyunjin hadn't even noticed him that night?! 

Well I should do something.. shouldn't I? 

I've not made any money recently. 

But do I have energy for sex? No.

But was it the better choice for what to do now- especially since he missed his shift? Yes.

He pushed himself off of his desk, quickly standing up before he could second guess his decision. He didn't have to dress like a slut to find a client, he could just wear jeans and a tee. His face was enough to carry him to the bedroom- luckily.

Well, was it a good thing? Felt a little degrading but- it just meant he was pretty.

Right?

He stayed in the clothes he wore earlier, throwing on his leather jacket just to stay warm, grabbed his wallet, keys and phone, and left.

If he didn't find anyone within the hour he'd just leave again. Simple as that.

He decided on going to the same bar as usual, just because he couldn't be bothered to walk further. Flashed his ID to the security guard outside, then went in.

It was hot in there- smelled like a mix of alcohol, sweat, and cheap perfume. Ew- did it always smell this bad? He could've sworn it usually smelled like expensive cologne and champagne. None of this cheap stuff..

He sat at the bar, pretending to look through the different drinks he could pick between. In reality he was just hoping something would happen.

"Could I get you anything?" The barista asked, Felix almost not even hearing her from the loud music pumping in the background. 

"Oh, right." Felix fixed his posture. "Just a mojito please."

The barista smiled, "You got it, should I add it to a tab?"

Felix shook his head, "Let me just pay you right away." he muttered, pulling some change from his pocket. He handed her the cash, giving her a awkward smile. 

"Great, if you just give me a minute." She counted the cash, putting it into the register, then slid away to make his drink. 

Felix dropped his head in his hands, rubbing his eyes, then running a hand through his messy hair. Goodness, I don't even feel like drinking.

He looked over his shoulder, seeing people dancing, making out, talking.. That used to be Felix. Now he's missing work, upset, and heartbroken. 

"Hey there little one," a voice said, Felix turned to the other side, eyes blank until they fell on a older man. Huh.. rich looking.

"Hi," Felix put on his usual seductive face, narrowing his eyes and looking up at the older through his eyelashes, giving him a slight smirk. It was almost pathetic how easy it was for him to go into that 'slutty' mode.

"All alone tonight?" The man asked, leaning his elbow on the counter.

Felix sighed, looking down. "Sadly." he pursed his lips.

The older man smirked. "Well, you know I could fix that, right?"

Felix met his eyes again, gaze dark and cold for a second before he softened his eyes. "Oh really? How so?"

"Well, I know how young people like you are. Always out for someone to fuck, aren't you?"

Felix chuckled, "Perhaps.. You wanna fuck me?"

The man glanced around the room, then lowered his head closer to Felix's. "I do, from the moment you just walked in. You're cute. Young too.."

Felix frowned a bit. Old single men were always a bit disgusting.

"That's correct," Felix said, the barista from before sliding his drink over to him. Felix gave her a polite smile, holding around the glass. 

The older man eyed the drink. "I want to bring you home." he said, looking down at Felix.

Felix let out a shaky breath. "Where do you live?" 

"Up the road. A two-minute walk." 

Felix nodded as if thinking. "Well you know I'm not going to be free, right?"

The man raised an eyebrow. "Free? How much do you expect?"

"Ten thousand won for every minute." Felix tilted his head teasingly.

"Ten thousand? Then what if I want you for an hour?" The man asked.

Felix shrugged. "Then I guess it'll be 600.000."

The man narrowed his eyes. "You're cheap." he said, almost suspiciously.

"Why?" Felix asked, "You want me to up the price?"

The man smirked. "Okay. 10.000 for every minute, and.." he reached into his wallet, showing Felix some messy bills. "100.000 for every rule you obey, okay?"

Felix couldn't say no to that offer. "Every rule? What are the rules?"

"I'll tell you when we get home, but I hope you don't mind trying some different kinks.. If you do, well then you'll just miss out on some of this." The man smirked. "But first, you shall call me Sir, okay? And I'll call you Kitten. Does that work for you?"

Felix frowned internally. It didn't sound as good as when Hyunjin did it. 

But forget Hyunjin- he should be cut out of your life by now, Felix.

"Great, I'll meet you outside in a minute then, Sir." Felix cringed a bit at himself.. goodness..

The man smirked. "Good Kitten. I'll meet you there," he said, turning around and leaving the bar. 

Felix quickly pulled out his phone, sending Seungmin a quick message just to let him now he wouldn't return home till later- likely when he was asleep. 

Seungmin gave the message a thumbs up, Felix sighing when he realized he really was gonna do it. 

It'd be the first person he slept with other than Hyunjin in a long time. Oof.. it feels strange- as if it's my first time ever hooking up with a stranger, when in reality, I've done it multiple times in the past. Screw Hyunjin for messing up my rhythm..

Matter-of-factly, Felix should really forget about Hyunjin. It wasn't okay for him to continuously creep back into his thoughts like this. He hated it.

So, ultimately, he scrolled through his contacts, clicking on Hyunjin's profile and..

...

He couldn't do it. He couldn't just block him.

His finger hovered over the block button, his mind going between blocking and forgetting him and trying to reach out one last time. Which was best to do?

"Felix?" a voice suddenly called out. 

No, it wasn't Hyunjin. Why would it be?

Not that he wanted it to be Hyunjin anyway.. that'd be the worst thing to happen right now.

Well.. second worst, because instead, it was his boss.

For fucks sake.. what is she doing here?

"Oh, hi boss.." Felix forced a awkward smile- though it didn't help the situation much.

"What are you doing here?" She asked, hands on her hips. 

"Oh- well, you know.. just catching up with some friends.." Felix said.

She raised an eyebrow, looking around. "I don't see any friends?"

"Oh.. he's outside." Felix corrected. Yeah, he was pretending the old man was his friend.

She didn't look quite convinced. "You skipped your shift for alcohol and chats? You've barely clocked in for any of your recent shifts- and I find you partying?"

Felix shook his head, realizing it didn't look so good that he had a drink beside him. "Oh no- I'm not partying- I swear. I was just talking with someone-"

"I thought you felt bad, therefore skipping work. I don't know about you, but drinking doesn't help when you feel sick or unmotivated. At least not for me." She crossed her arms.

"I was just-" Felix started.

"Just what? Drinking? Chatting? You've already said that. If you have the energy to do that how come you don't bother working?" 

Felix bit his lip. "It wont happen again boss.. I'm sorry."

She sighed, looking behind her. "You know I was just out with the other restaurant managers tonight. I didn't expect to see you here out of everyone. Skipping work."

Felix should've just left with the man.

"I'm sorry boss."

She tilted her head, "You know, Mia. She's really been working hard lately. Taking all your shifts and working extra. You used to be like that too- then you just.. forgot about it. It saddens me. You used to be the best employee."

"Sorry.."

She sighed. "No, don't be. I am."

Felix gave her a odd look. 

"You're fired, I'm sorry."

Felix almost felt his whole world collapse in front of his own eyes. "What? Boss- wait, I won't do it again! I swear on my life- it was just a one time thing-"

"But it wasn't just a one time thing? Mia has been working her butt off covering your shifts. She's doing all her and your work plus extra. I don't need a waiter who's not going to serve people." she said. "I'm sorry but, you're off. I've been considering it for a while now. You can come pick up your shirt and badge or whatever else you want to bring home tomorrow noon." She said, then turned back around and left.

Felix's mouth stayed open- he wanted to argue further but she was already gone- back to discussing with her coworkers about- probably- business stuff.

He clenched his jaw. Squeezing the phone in his hands. Fucking asshole. 

It's all Hyunjin's fault! If only he hadn't left him in a situation where he had to come out like this he wouldn't have gotten fired!

If only he'd never even came into his already god-awful life to begin with!

Fucking Hyunjin. I hate you.

In one swift movement, he clicked the block button, blocking Hyunjin from ever messaging him or calling him again. 

That asshole had left him on read anyway.

Felix didn't want to ever see him again. 

Now he had to sleep with twice the amount of people until he found another job. 

Fuck, he was going to drown in debt. 

Chapter Text

Picking up his stuff from the restaurant was embarrassing. 

Mia tried starting conversation but clearly saw Felix didn't have the energy before leaving again. He wasn't going to waste time on someone who stole his job.

But she didn't steal my job. It was my fault for not showing up, and my fault she had to cover all my shifts.

He sighed. "I'm a horrible human being..." he muttered to himself, throwing his bag over his shoulders, "...after Hyunjin. He's worse."

Then, he left through the staff only door, a little ironic, leaving the restaurant without looking back.

He didn't even like the job anyway... not so much, at least.

Finding another job was probably better for him anyway.. at least, that's what he kept telling himself that day- and the following days.

Seungmin, Changbin, and Ji already knew. He told them the day it happened after returning home clearly upset. Seungmin had asked him what was wrong.

He lied in his bed like he'd done the previous days, staring at the wall his desk stood against. It was a plain white wall. So boring.

He knew he couldn't paint the place as they were just renting, but he should've hung some bright colored posters or something up- anything other than white, gray, or black. It made him feel depressed.

He heard a knock at the door. 

He couldn't bother speak up, hoping Seungmin would just come in like he always did without him answering.

"Lix?.. Can I come in?" Seungmin asked, voice soft and careful.

Felix whined, "Mmm.."

He hoped Seungmin understood.

Luckily he did, slowly opening the door.

He sat next to Felix on the bed, sighing. "Lix, you should come eat."

Felix shut his eyes. "Not hungry."

Seungmin stayed quiet, then spoke. "I know, but it's been two days. At least let me cut you an apple."

His mom always used to cut him apples. No one had offered that since..

He met Seungmin's eyes. "No." he said sternly.

Seungmin licked his lips. "Why not..?" he asked carefully.

Felix sighed. "I don't have energy to eat or chew food." and it was true, he barely even had the energy to speak.

"Well.." Seungmin said, thinking. "..what about I make you a smoothie? You just drink it. I can put your favorite strawberries and blackberries in?"

Felix shook his head no.

Seungmin furrowed his brows. "Well how are you gonna get energy if you don't eat anything?! You need to eat to get energy to eat more- to get energy to go out again. I haven't seen you in school for weeks." Felix knew from the slight whiny tone in his voice that he was growing frustrated with him. "It's as if.. ever since that day Hyunjin dropped off that note or something, you just haven't-"

The mention of Hyunjin made his ears focus, eyes widening. Sure, he'd been secretly thinking of Hyunjin this whole time, but someone else bringing him up felt like another stab to his heart.

"Seungmin." he warned, not meeting his eyes. "Stop, please.. I've just been tired."

The younger stayed silent, then quietly spoke again. "We have a very exciting three day trip to Busan this Friday with our classmates and another class. Maybe you can consider showing up to that? We're staying at a nice hotel, far from here. It can bring your mind away from whatever's going on. School's paying, not us, so don't worry about that." 

Felix glanced at his face. "Thank you Seungmin, I'll have to see." 

Seungmin gave him a small smile, then got up from the bed. "Okay. I did still make some extra pasta for you in case you want. It's in the pot. I'm going to Chris' place."

"Okay, thank you." Felix forced a small smile back, seeing Seungmin leave his room again, shutting the door behind him. 

Felix stared at the spot where Seungmin sat. He felt so guilty. Ugh, really, all his friends were so sweet- especially Seungmin, his roommate- but why was Felix so rude to them?

He wasn't even rude.. now he was just overthinking again.

Well, was he rude? Seungmin asked and offered so kindly, and he said no every single time. 

He was just overthinking. Seungmin wasn't mad. Seungmin wouldn't leave him.

Oh but what if he did.

Felix started tearing up, always so sensitive and emotional from his own thoughts. 

He honestly wished Seungmin could stay with him. Not to talk, but just so he'd be with someone. To not be lonely and feel abandoned again.

He sighed, rolling around on his bed.

Realistically, he should agree on the field trip, but what if the other class going was Hyunjin's? He was not about to risk being with him.

But, a escape would be nice, even if just for a bit.

Friday.. the trip was in just two days.

He should go. It's a paid trip. It'd be nice.

He searched for his phone, unsure of where it even was at this point. 

He found it between the crack of his mattress and headboard, grabbing it. 

It'd been on Do not Disturb mode for days, so he hadn't read any of his recent messages.. maybe he should.

He opened Jisung's contact.

Ji: Lix, we have a field trip in 5 days. On Friday. You should consider coming!

Ji: I think Seungmin, Changbin and I are. It'd be so lonely without you. You're the only one I can stand..

Ji: Please consider it bby :D

Felix noticed he hadn't even answered for days. Oops.

Well, he hadn't even read the messages, so how could he possibly respond?

Felix: Sorry Ji, I haven't been on my phone lately. 

Felix: I'll have to see if I bother.

Felix: Do you perchance know which class we're going on that field trip with? 

A second passed before Jisung responded. Well, he was always on his phone- what else could he expect?

Ji: Oh I think it might be the class with Yuri? Or maybe it's the other class, the one with Minju..?

Felix chuckled to himself. 

Felix: Never mind then, just let me know if you find out :)

Jisung responded to that with a thumbs up, and Felix scrolled to check his other contacts.

He should find out which class they're going on that field trip with, because if it's with Hyunjin, he's staying home. If it isn't, he'll so gladly go- for a fact, he'd love to go. Hopefully it just wasn't a class with Hyunjin in it. Please.

But wait- isn't Hyunjin on a trip to Japan- or was he? Is he maybe already back? He should ask Jeongin.

Obviously if he's still in Japan by the time Friday rolls around he'll be too tired to go on that field trip..

Pulling up Jeongin's contact, he realized he'd already informed him about the field trip too. Great. Then it was likely that Hyunjin would tag along- if he's back in Korea already.

Jeongin: Felix, it's been so long since I've last seen you!

Jeongin: Are you doing alright? I haven't heard from you in forever.

Jeongin: I was just going to tell you, I mean you've probably heard but, field trip on Friday. Consider joining, it'll be soo fun!

Felix: Sorry, I've not felt so well recently. I've heard, yeah. I might come, I'll see. What are the details of the trip? Could you tell me pls?

Jeongin: Of course! So we leave Friday at 9 in the morning, meeting at the train station just beside campus, it'll be a couple hours, but there are no assigned seats. I'm pretty sure it's your class and ours going. It's a decent hotel, by a museum. We'll be there for a couple days, then head back. We're going to the museum the first day, and for dinner to a nice all you can eat place, amusement park the second, and dinner you can choose yourself that day. Then we also have to watch a movie in a cinema on day three before heading back. It'll be sooooo fun! Really consider it :D

Felix bit his lip nervously. He really wanted to go.

Felix: Oh that does sound very fun...

Felix: Which of your friends are going?

He figured that was a somewhat discreet way of figuring out if Hyunjin was going or not.

Jeongin: Oof... I don't know. I think Chris, Minho, and Hyunjin are all going. Then also Haeun and Julia and my other friends of course.

Felix frowned. Hyunjin. Of course. He had all the money in the world- why would he wanna go to Busan? Why did he have to ruin this opportunity for Felix. He hadn't been out of the city for years- and this was a all paid trip!

Felix: Ohh, well I don't think I can come. Sorry.

Jeongin: Why not?

Felix: I honestly just don't feel well. I don't think I could handle so much in such few days. Too many activities in such short time you know, lol.

Jeongin didn't reply for a good minute or two. 

Jeongin: Oh, well, Hyunjin really wanted to see you there.

Felix bit down a little too hard on his lip, causing a little blood to flow out. Heck no was he risking having sharing a hotel room with Hyunjin.

Felix: Well tell him I won't be going.

He typed angrily, laying his phone face down. Stupid Hyunjin. Why did he want to see Felix so bad? He was the one who ruined everything anyway.

He got up, stretching his tense body. "Ughhh..." he groaned, then heard his stomach rumble. 

Perhaps Seungmin was right. Even though he didn't feel hungry he clearly was. His stomach was upset with him at the lack of nutrients. 

He left his phone behind, dragging his feet to the kitchen. In a pot on the stove were some pasta screws, still somewhat hot as Seungmin had just made it not too long ago. There was also a small pan with some sauce, but he skipped that part, just eating some plain pasta with a bit of salt for flavor.

It was boring but he didn't really care about that. He just had to eat. For a fact, the less flavor the better. He didn't have much of an appetite so too many flavors would just sicken him. 

Though it wasn't the most delicious at least he was getting some nutrients in, right?

Well, maybe taking some of that sauce would've helped too. It had meat in it. That was what his body needed, but he didn't think about that in the moment. Plain pasta probably wasn't benifitting him much...

Whatever.

He ate the small portion he served himself the best he could, then drank two whole cups of water. He was dehydrated.

His own fault.

Seungmin had been getting him water and refilling the old water with new cold water every two hours. He just didn't bother drinking it.

Probably because he had been sleeping 80% of the day every. single. day.

But it was nice. He'd really needed it. Hadn't gotten good sleep since god knows when.

After eating and drinking he went and brushed his teeth, that was one of the only things he actually bothered doing even at a time like this. Even though he hadn't eaten the previous two days, it just felt wrong going to sleep without brushing his teeth.. the same with showering.

He frowned at his reflection in the mirror, brushing his hair just so it wouldn't tangle and put on some moisturizer. 

Dragging his feet back to his bedroom, he quickly fell asleep again, not bothering checking for what Jeongin could've replied to what he wrote.

...

Thursday came quickly. Felix had told Seungmin that evening while eating dinner that he wasn't going to go on the trip with their class, but for him and their two friends to go and enjoy themselves the best they could without him, that he really was okay and doing better. 

Seungmin was a bit hesitant at first, but obviously believed him as they were actually eating dinner together that night, which Felix hadn't done for days. 

He didn't look as tired, and was eating a lot- probably to make up for the lack of food the previous days- and he was talking more.

"I think I'm going to try getting a job at the clothing store nearby." Felix said, taking a sip of his drink. "They pay well, and it's not too difficult. I just need to assist customers- mostly younger people- fold clothes, and occasionally stand at the register."

Seungmin nodded, "That's great! It's quite literally a five minute walk from campus."

Felix smiled. "I'll probably apply over the weekend, while you guys are out." 

"That sounds like a nice plan." Seungmin smiled, clearly happy to see Felix was doing better. "Should I then just go ahead and tell Ji and Changbin you aren't coming?"

Felix nodded. "Yeah, that's fine. I think I'll try going out tomorrow anyway."

Seungmin froze momentarily. "To work?"

"Yeah." Felix met his gaze. "I haven't worked in a long time. I mean even if I get the job at the clothing store I probably still need to do sex work."

Seungmin stayed silent, eyes darting between both of Felix's. "Felix," he said, tone serious now. "We won't be home though. We'll be hours away. I thought we agreed you'd only do prostitution as a job if we were home to help you incase something bad happened. What if someone tries abducting you? You'll message us but we won't even be near you to save you."

Felix forced a chuckle, "Seungminnie, I've never had a single bad encounter before though. The chance of it happening during the three days you guys are gone are practically 0. No one will try and hurt me- and if I really need help I'll call the police."

Seungmin spoke in a concerned tone now, "Felix, you don't understand how risky it is. If you message us we might not even notice. We might be sleeping or in the cinema. At the end of the day there are scary men out there. I'm just asking you to wait till Monday evening to go. Then we'll be back. For a fact you can go Monday afternoon as we'll be back in the morning, but just wait till we're at least in the city please."

Felix smiled, moving a hand over Seungmin's, his touch warm. "I promise Seungmin. Nothing bad will happen. I swear on my life. If something bad happens, you can scold me all you want- but it won't happen."

"I won't have to scold you because you'd probably already be dead or trafficked!" Seungmin pulled his hand from under Felix's. "Wait till Monday."

"Seungmin." Felix narrowed his eyes. "I told you it'll be fine. You don't have to worry. I've been doing this for years. I'll go to the same place as always."

Seungmin frowned. 

Felix licked his lips. "Look, if you really don't want me to go that badly, I could just leave without saying anything to you three at all. Would that be better? No, right? So just let me go. I'm telling you now, giving you a heads-up, that's the only closure you're getting. It'd be worse if I kept you in the dark, but at least I'm being honest."

Seungmin glanced around the room silently.

"But Felix.. do you swear nothing will happen? I mean all your friends will be gone. Jeongin too, and Hyunjin! All our classmates. Seriously no one will be here. The closest people you'd have are my parents or our professors."

Felix chuckled. "I know, Min. I promise. Besides, I love your parents. They're the parents I never had, and they always take care of me. Trust me, I'll be safe."

Seungmin hesitated, then sighed. "Fine. But you better let me know when you're going out. If I don't wake up to a message from you next morning I am calling the police to come knock on our door and check if you're home. Or even worse- I'm reporting you missing."

Felix rolled his eyes. "So protective for what.. but alright."

Seungmin still looked unsure of it all, but knew he couldn't budge Felix at this point. "Alright. And I'm a man of my words. Please message me the following morning. Police will be notified otherwise."

Felix couldn't help but smile at how Seungmin was acting. Maybe he was right, but he highly doubted it.

Nothing was going to happen.

...

Felix hugged Seungmin goodbye the following morning. 

"I know it's only three days, but I'll miss you so much." Felix said, squeezing Seungmin.

"I know." Seungmin agreed. "Let's just call every day, okay?"

"Of course," Felix pulled away, helping Seungmin get his mini suitcase. "I'll see you Monday, then! Please send pictures and bring something home for me."

Seungmin smiled, nodding. "Of course I will. I gotta go now though, or I might miss the train. I love you! Bye!"

"Bye bye!" Felix waved, locking the door once Seungmin had gone down the elevator.

Now he'd have to get used to pure silence at home for three days straight.

No more of Seungmin's delicious dinners. Damn that sucked.

Instead, he decided on focusing on both the job application he'd send out tomorrow- or Sunday- and what his plan was for the evening.

I'll probably just head to the usual bar. Find a client, maybe bring them to my place as it's safer that way- considering I don't have anyone to help in case they force me to stay at their place- take the money and send them out. No way in hell I'll let them stay.

I could also try and find more than one client... double the pay... but is two-on-one really smart when I'm all vulnerable and alone?

I'll have to see how the evening plays out...

Realistically, it was only 8.40 in the morning, he had maybe 12 hours before going out.

What should he do with all that time?..

He will start by writing his job application. Then he should study.

He'd been slacking off over the last few weeks..

To not stay in this horrible loop and bad work field, he has to study to get a good job. To not depend on others to give him money, but to be able to earn it himself.

He'd always just considered a typical office job if his dream of becoming a stay-at-home husband- or rather sugar baby- didn't work out, and to even have a chance at that he needed to go back to his old ways. School, study, work, study again, sleep, repeat. It was a rough time, but it benefitted him.

And he really needed that now, considering he'd lost 50% of his income from losing his job at the restaurant.

He found his beat-up laptop and started working on the job application. 

It didn't take long, mostly because he copied the same layout he used from the restaurant application- just tweaking and adjusting it a bit- and saved it in his folders. 

He then pulled out the mails he'd gotten over the last week or two from his professors and started working on the topics they'd learned about those days, making sure he wouldn't fall too far behind.

After all he was already halfway through college, and if he didn't get himself together he'd struggle finding a job and drown further in debt so, this was the best decision long term- and probably also just for now.

And he spend the next six hours doing that.

At 3 in the afternoon, he'd gotten himself some lunch and went for a walk- embarrassingly, it was his first time out in days- and went back home, relaxing as his body clearly needed it.

Not in the napping way, but in the way where you just forget about everything, put on a fun show or movie and eat snacks until you can't physically chew anymore from your jaw aching too much.

It was well needed, and it really woke him up again. Who was he just a day ago repeating that horrible cycle of not eating and only sleeping because of a man? It'd already happened once in the past, and though he swore not to let it happen again, he let Hyunjin hurt him in that way. It was stupid, really.

Forgetting yourself over a random boy?

Never. Again.

...

He'd decided on dressing a little more revealing tonight, more so for himself then for others, wearing very short shorts, black mesh tights and some boots with a bit of heel on them. A tight, cropped top with rips all over it- practically making it useless- and put on makeup.

It wasn't often he did that, somewhat from fear of being too much or getting caught by a schoolmate.. that would be awkward.

But tonight it didn't matter. He shouldn't care about other people's opinions anymore. Shouldn't refrain from doing things he want to in fear of being judged. It didn't even matter, he wouldn't see any of his classmates in two years time. Who in the world would even bother remembering him wearing makeup?

So, he tried a smoky eye look, curled his lashes- maybe ripping a few out- covering them in dark mascara, highlighter and glitter all over his face. He kind of looked like a mix of a disco ball and a stripper at once, but, isn't that the goal?

He finished, carefully picking out some jewelry and admiring his look.

Wow, it’s been so long.. I barely even recognize this side of me. Last time I went all out like this.. must’ve been around the time I first met Hyunjin or so, maybe even before that.

But I’ve missed it. I just wish I had the time to go out like this without it being to flirt with older men.

He send Seugmin a message as he'd sworn, 

Felix: I'm going out now Minnie, I promise I'll message you when I'm home or latest by dawn. Love you, miss you.

He put his phone in his pocket, along with his keys after locking the front door. With these looks, he was sure he'd find at least one client, so he took the risk of not bringing his wallet with him.

Hopefully, he was right. 

He stepped through the all-too familiar roads, walking down the sidewalks, admiring the sunset, entering the bar.

Annoying music blasted his ears like always, but he tried not paying attention to it, scanning the area. Seemed like a nice evening. Friday evening, well who wouldn't come now of all days? 

Everyone was celebrating the weekend, along with many rich people. 

Felix smirked, then wiped it off, approaching the bar- but before he could even sit, a hand wrapped around his waist. "Hey, you.. you look rather sexy tonight," a man, maybe around his thirties said. "What's your name?"

Felix tried not showing interest, that's always what got them bidding money. 

"What makes you think you deserve to know?" He glanced at the man through his lashes.

The male smirked. "You're a sex worker, aren't you?"

Felix seemed unimpressed by his words. Well of course, his eyes said.

The man chuckled at his look, a deep low sound. "Well it would've been shocking were you not. You could earn millions with just your face."

Felix knew. Hyunjin paid him millions once.

"How much for you to come home with me tonight, doll?" The male asked, eyes narrowing to once of a predator. Eugh.. scary..

"I'm not going home with anyone tonight," Felix said, eyes dragging across the room.

The man used a hand to move Felix's head back towards him, catching his attention again. "I have a lot for someone like you.. just name your price."

Felix rolled his eyes. "I'm not going home with anyone."

The man was about to argue back, but Felix spoke again. "But.. you might get the chance of coming home with me to my place."

The mans eyes darkened, smirk widening, "Oh.. you're one of those. What, you scared I'll hold you hostage or something?"

"No," Felix frowned. "I just live nearby, gets the job done faster, right?" 

The man seemed to think, then smiled. "Of course." But it looked fake, but who was Felix to tell? The flashing lights were already messing with his eyesight as it was.

"Well, are you going to tell me your price or no?" The man asked, grip still tight around Felix's waist.

Felix thought, he didn't really have a set price, he just took as much as he could get. "What are you willing to pay?"

The man's eyes roamed the room. "500.000."

"Pfft..." Felix held back a laugh. "I thought you said my face alone was worth millions. Not interested, sorry!"

"Alright, wait." The man didn't let Felix go, grip still tight around his waist, now moving to his hips. "A million."

Felix took a deep breath. Was the night already over like that? No drink, just an immediate customer? 

"For how long?" Felix asked.

"Uh.. the whole night?" The man suggested. "As in till morning."

Felix stared at him blankly. Now that was a big request.

"You're talking around 12 hours? A million for half a day?" 

The man seemed to think nervously. "You're right. I'll do two."

Now shit, that was a lot of money. Felix didn't want to have a stranger spend the night at his home though, but he'd never gotten offered so much..

Well, except for that one time with Hyunjin...

But 12 whole hours? 

"Do you plan to fuck me those full 12 hours straight or what?" Felix asked, looking curiously up at the older.

"Well of course. I'm not spending so much on a quick one just to leave within the hour again." The man said, as if it were obvious. "Afraid your little body can't take it or what?"

Ew.. little body?

"I can take pretty much anything." Felix said. After all, what had he not been through? He'd seen his home burn down right in front of his eyes at a young age, heard his parents died just around that time as well and lost his sister. What could he not take?

Well.. creeps.. but this man wasn't one, was he? 

He probably just had a thing for size differences or something. That was understandable.

"Anything, you say?" The man smirked. "Should we put that to the test, then? Is it a deal?"

Felix smirked. "You know what, why not."

The man nodded approvingly, already dragging Felix out by the arm. A bit aggressive but alright.

He dragged him out of the bar, to the streets, on the sidewalk, the sun still barely visible as he'd only been inside for a few minutes.

"Oh, I live the other way." Felix pointed out when the man seemingly took him the opposite direction.

"Oh. I just need to get my wallet from my car. Mind following?"

Uhhh… no?

"You didn't have your wallet with you inside?" Felix asked suspiciously.

The man glanced back, tugging Felix beside him roughly.

Ow…

"No. I just figured you'd wanna be paid upfront?" The man said.

Felix thought. "Oh. Well, I do, but-"

"It's just down the road." The man insisted.

Felix didn't really want to go, it felt a bit sketch.

Especially now observing the mans outfit, it didn't even look all that expensive. A sweater, slacks, chain and a watch- both which obviously could be fake. Felix hadn't paid attention to that earlier as the man approached him, not the other way around.

The younger narrowed his eyes. "I'll just wait up here, it's no issue." He smiled.

The mans gaze darkened. "Are you scared? After I promised you so much money?"

Felix chuckled awkwardly, the grip on his arm starting to ache. "No no- I mean.."

"You are scared, aren't you? Why don't you believe me?" The man pulled Felix further down the road, further from both the people and his home. It started getting quieter the further they got.

"No! I was really okay with it- you just don't need to hold on so tight, I'll follow." Felix said, trying to pry his wrist away from the man. It was hurting.

"No, I can't trust you now." The man said.

Felix felt a horrible feeling in his stomach. "Sir- whatever your name is- I can follow. I promise."

The man didn't respond, just pulled him further down the quiet, empty streets, now no people in sight.

Felix couldn't even see a a ‘expensive’ car anywhere, just a beat down old black van in the distance. 

"Sir.. you're starting to hurt my wrist quite a bit.."

The man still didn't respond. They only neared the van.

"Uh... sir? I... are you sure you have the money? Let's just go back, I don't mind getting paid in the morning. No rush."

"Just let me pay now, it's fine. We're just about there." And it was the truth. The van was just a couple meters down.

Felix didn't like the feeling he was getting in his gut, not being able to pull away. What if Seungmin was right? He really didn't have anyone to help him right now. His friends, classmates, even closest teachers out of the city. No parents or siblings.

He started to tear up involuntarily. "Sir," he didn't dare make it obvious the was crying. "Are you sure you even have the money?" Felix shouldn't have asked, but it felt wrong. This felt bad.

The man instead stopped abruptly, eyes angry at Felix. "What is your issue? Why don't you trust me? You can just hop in the van with me and see that the wallet is in the back."

Felix couldn't help but sob. No, he didn't want to. He was probably going to get killed. He should've listened to Seungmin. Now he'll probably never see him again.

But.. strangely, before he could sob up a response, the man spoke again.

"And what the hell is your issue?" Felix was about to apologize, but noticed the man wasn't even staring at him. In fact, he was staring at something beside him.

Felix couldn't help think of the worst. Fuck, there were two of them. They were going to gang-rape him and kill him and sell him for his organs. He was done for.

But that didn't happen.. it only confused him more.

"Seriously? Why are you just staring?!" The man started yelling at the so-called person beside him. Maybe he was drunk and seeing things?..

But before Felix could even check if there were a person beside him, the man got punched in the face, his grip on Felix faltering. 

Felix sobbed, pulling his arm back to himself, rubbing his reddened skin. 

He only saw Hyunjin. Hyunjin punching the man down to the asphalt ground, punching his face and kicking his sides till blood was freely pouring from the mans nose and his eye swelled up, small cuts down his face.

Felix cringed at the cracking sounds, crying even harder at the sight in front of him. 

Hyunjin said something to the man but Felix couldn't hear. Only his own sobs and sniffles registering in his mind. 

Suddenly though, Felix snapped back to reality.

Hyunjin.

Fucking Hwang Hyunjin. 

What was he doing here?!

Felix pulled Hyunjin from the man, sobbing angry tears now. "What the hell are you doing?!"

Hyunjin only took deep breaths, glancing back at the man to make sure he wouldn't get back up.

"We were just going to go home to me! You know my fucking job!"

Felix didn't know why he suddenly was defending the man. Maybe it was the fact being abducted was better than seeing Hyunjin ever again. Maybe it was because he didn't want Hyunjin to stop him from doing his job once again.

"He promised me so much money Hyunjin! You fucking know how bad I need it!" Felix cried, throwing small punches on Hyunjin, though he didn't budge much. 

"I need the money Hyunjin! I lost my other job," his voice cracked. "I only have this! You can't keep doing this to me! Coming into my life pretending to care! Now I have to find another fucking person willing to fuck me!"

"Don't you see he was going to fucking take you?!" Hyunjin argued back, for the first time yelling at Felix. "Who knows what he would've done! That fucking creep had you crying and you still want his fuckass money?!"

Felix cried, "Oh shut up! You're not even supposed to be here! You were supposed to be in Busan now or something!"

Hyunjin's face hardened. "Well I obviously didn't go! I didn't want to go on that cheap ass trip!"

"Cheap?! I haven't been on a goddamn trip in years, and this was all paid by the teachers! I only stayed home so I could avoid you and you didn't even go?! Cheap ass trip?! That just shows how fucking rich you are! You're sick! I would do anything for a fucking trip out of this fucking city! How spoiled can you be!"

Hyunjin reached out and held Felix's shoulders firmly. "Stop yelling! I clearly only signed up to meet you there! It's not my fucking fault you didn't go! I didn't hold you back!"

Felix frowned deeper. "Yes you did! You ruin everything! Now I have to fucking fix my ruined makeup just to find another client and earn money to just pay 1/2 of my rent for this month alone! You don't understand how hard this is! How am I ever supposed to get out of this debt I'm drowning in when you don't even let me pay for rent!"

"I'm just trying to help you! You could've been dead by now for all I know! Aren't you glad I stayed back and got this fucker! You would've been all alone if I hadn't come when I did! I saved you!" Hyunjin argued back.

"No you didn't! He was going to pay me so much!" Felix wasn't even understanding himself anymore. Just rambling pure nonsense. He just wanted to prove Hyunjin wrong.

"What?" Hyunjin laughed incredulously. "You're being serious? He was going to traffic you or some shit!" He yelled.

Felix had stopped sobbing by now, just pure rage filling his body. "Hyunjin! I'm just trying to survive! I just need money! You'd never understand! You grew up rich! It's not fair, you don't understand what it's like! At this point being killed is better than staying in this continuous loop of you holding me back from earning money, acting all protective to just leave me heartbroken and alone!"

Hyunjin breathed heavily. "I don't understand what it's like, no, and I'm not saying so either Felix. I just want to help. Let me help." He said carefully, eyes soft and searching Felix's.

Felix caught his breath, staring at Hyunjin. "Two million. He promised."

"And you promised you wouldn't go back to this work environment but I guess everyone lies." Hyunjin argued back. 

Felix frowned, staying quiet. "It's all I have.." he said after a while, looking down to the ground in embarrassment and humiliation.

Hyunjin took a deep, shaky breath. "I know. But you need to know when people are good versus when they're bad. He was clearly bad."

Felix met his eyes again. "Well if you didn't know by now I suck at that. I thought you were good too, but look how you turned out."

Hyunjin sighed, "I am good, Felix. I just messed up. I was an ass and I do apologize for that, but, I've done more good than bad, but people tend to only remember the bad as that's what stings and hurts the most, but don't forget the talks we had, the... nights we spend together. I mean, it wasn't all for nothing. I do miss it. Miss you."

Felix didn't dare meet his gaze. "You hurt me."

Hyunjin sighed. "I know. You hurt me too. I thought I was just helping you that night but I just upset you, my mistake. I didn't dare reach out because you told me not to, and then when I did, I was blocked. I just wanted to see you again, and this was the only way I knew how. I checked the restaurant too, but they told me you left. I signed up for the trip hoping you'd come but then Jeongin told me you wouldn't be. I was scared I wouldn't get a chance to apologize, but here I am. I'm sorry, so deeply sorry, I was just trying to help you, but I'm stupid when it comes to this. How do you help someone without coming off as obsessed and overprotective? I don't know because I've never cared for someone as I do for you. I was just doing what I thought as right."

Felix slowly met his eyes, but didn't say anything.

Hyunjin spoke again after thinking. "I also found you tonight because I wanted to.. make you an offer, since we'd be all alone anyway with no friends to disturb us.."

"What?" Felix asked, careful and suspicious.

Hyunjin exhaled shakily. "The reason you even got upset with me in the beginning of all of this- and tonight- is because I don't you working in this field.. it's not safe and it's disgusting and sad for a young person like you to do."

Felix waited for him to go on. He already knew all of that.

"I was just going to ask if you'd leave this field... stop working as a prostitute." Hyunjin asked almost shyly.

Felix knew he should, but it was the easiest job for money and it was efficient. "I know it's bad but I can't- I already told you-"

"Wait, don't get mad yet." Hyunjin cut him off. "I.. um.. look, straight up.. I liked you, Felix, and I still do.. and I have a feeling you liked me too.. especially since I ‘broke your heart’ as you said which- obviously isn't possible if I didn't have it in the first place- and.. the offer.. it's just.."

Felix stared blankly at him, "What..? You're gonna make me your sugar baby?"

Hyunjin shook his head. "No, not quite.. just.. ask you to drop out of this work field.. if I maybe gave you some money..”

Felix sighed. "Hyunjin. I get what you're saying, but I can't. You giving me money will benefit me for a month or two. Then what do I do after that? I have to stay working like this."

Hyunjin frowned. "But I'll pay you way more than any of those motherfuckers."

"Wasn't that what you said last time as well? Before ghosting me?" Felix frowned.

Hyunjin sighed- "No, Felix, I didn't dare answer because you told me not to reach out. I didn't want to upset you further so I didn't text you, and I have so many people in my contacts- you can even look yourself if you want- I didn't even know you'd messaged me first, so I really did not mean to ghost you."

Felix glanced at him.. not trusting him yet.. "I can't agree to your deal anyway.. I can't rely on one singular person alone for money. I've learned multiple times by now. I'm sorry."

Hyunjin tightened his grip on Felix's shoulders. "Felix, please just hear me out. I swear I'll never do anything to hurt you ever again."

Felix rolled his eyes. "I've heard that one before."

Hyunjin furrowed his brows. "Felix. Please give me a second chance! I swear on my life I won't hurt you. I love you, why would I?!"

Felix froze. "You're lying again. You never loved me."

Hyunjin chuckled from pure desperation. "Felix! I swear I'm not! Fuck, I've had a thing for you ever since I hired you that one night. I was so happy when I saw you in school again a few weeks after. I thought maybe I could actually have a chance at a future with you. I wanted you so badly and I still do. I swear on everything I have I only have my heart set on you. I just want you to be safe. It's all I care about right now!"

Felix inhaled shakily, almost on the verge of tearing up again. "You don't understand how hard it is to trust someone after everything I've been through, though. My parents? They also swore they'd be back, but guess what? They didn't make it. The people who took care of me and my sister? They swore we wouldn't get separated at adoption, but we did. A family wanted her, nobody wanted me. The previous guys who have said the exact same as you? Lied too. And you? You already broke my heart once, how can I trust you won't do it again?" Just the mention of his parents had Felix's voice cracking. The memory of him and his sister being separated, the memory of nobody wanting him. Not one single family.

Hyunjin stared sadly at Felix, unsure of what to say. Instead, he pulled him into a hug.

Felix let him for a moment, letting himself be embraced while another few tears fell, but then he pushed off of Hyunjin. "No, go away. I don't want this bullshit. Just leave me alone."

But Hyunjin's grip didn't falter, "Felix-"

"Let go Hyunjin!" Felix sobbed, pushing at his chest, but Hyunjin barely budged. He couldn't see the love of his life just.. give up like that. No way.

"Felix please! I swear on everything I have!"

"Let go!" Felix cried, squirming from Hyunjin's grip. 

With one particular hard push, he freed himself, glancing at the passed out man on the ground, then at Hyunjin. He didn't say anything, just turned, and started walking, ugly crying.

Hyunjin's mind scrambled for something quick to say. Anything to have Felix come back.

I swear on my life!

Felix, I'll take you on a trip!

I'll get you a job at my parents company!

"I'll pay you ten million for tonight!"

Shit, he shouldn't have gone with that one, he didn't want to objectify Felix, but it had the younger pausing, freezing on the sidewalk. 

Then, slowly, he turned. 

Voice trembling, he asked.. "Ten million..?" Still sobbing.

God Hyunjin hated that it was the only thing he could do. Buying Felix for a night as if he were merely a object to be used and then dumped.

"Yes. Just for tonight." Hyunjin said, slowly approaching Felix.

Felix's mind was clearly all over the place, gears shifting, thinking.

Well it was clearly a good deal, he would obviously say yes- Hyunjin knew- but then what was he thinking about?

He had unshed tears in his eyes. "Ten..?"

"Yes." Hyunjin confirmed again, though Felix wasn't really asking, just processing. 

That would really help him financially..

But god, how he hated Hyunjin.

He stayed silent, then spoke.. "Ten million... for one night... are you insane?"

Hyunjin swallowed. "Only for you."

Felix sniffled, a few minutes passing in silence with occasional sobs from Felix. "That's a lot..." he cried. Was he happy or sad? Hyunjin didn't know.

"It is.." he said, Felix dropping his head.

"Are you sure you'd spend so much on me?" Felix asked, head down crying. Hyunjin could see tears falling onto the asphalt. 

"I'm sure. I'd spend every won I have on you, even if it was just for one minute. You're all I want." Hyunjin said softly, caressing Felix's head as he sobbed, Felix leaning against his chest.

"How can I say no?" Felix sobbed. He hated this. Hated how he couldn't possibly say no to this offer but hated how it was Hyunjin of all people.

Hyunjin felt his heartbeat quicken. "Is it a yes then..?" he asked.

Felix sobbed, "..yes.. but.."

"But?" Hyunjin asked.

Felix continued. "..but.. only sex. That's what you're paying me for. We're not talking. I can't do that.. I'm too mentally exhausted. Just.. fuck me and leave.. okay?"

Hyunjin frowned. "But I'm paying to be with you- I don't even want to fu-"

"Well then I can't do it." Felix sobbed. "I'm a prostitute. Not a boyfriend of yours." It strangely hurt Felix's heart to say that.

Hyunjin's heart cracked, maybe even broke. 

"...fine then. I'll fuck you. I'll give you the money when we're inside." He said coldly.

Felix sniffled, but nodded, walking towards his home with Hyunjin. It was quiet, awkward, and the walk felt way longer than usual.

When they arrived, they both got rid of their shoes- Hyunjin washing his hands extra well after beating that guy- before finding Felix and pulling out his phone. 

"I'll send you the money digitally... I don't have ten million in cash."

Felix understood and nodded, giving his mobile pay account. 

He watched Hyunjin type in 10.000.000, breath hitching when he pressed send. Not even a second after he received a notification saying that he'd gotten transferred money.

He swallowed, going to his bedroom, Hyunjin following ever so silently. 

It was quiet, it was awkward, but it was what it was- what could they do about it.

At the end of the day they were just two stupid college students confused- maybe even in love- but in denial.

"I think the bank might call me in a second as I send a lot of money, asking if they should block my card.." Hyunjin said quietly as Felix took off his jewelry.

"Okay," Felix said. "I'll just undress meanwhile."

Hyunjin glanced at him. "You can stay in your clothes."

Felix glared back. "We're here for sex, not conversations. We can't have sex clothed."

Right... sex. 

Hyunjin tapped his phone nervously, waiting for the call.

It came just a few minutes after, the silence of the room being replaced by his voice. "No it was intentional. No, my card has not been stolen. No, don't block my card. Yes, I will be sending more money like that again throughout the night."

Felix missed that part, hearing only a ringing in his ears until Hyunjin lowered his phone, now standing across from him."

Felix was only in his briefs, jewelry off, makeup smeared. 

His eyeshadow wasn't perfect, his mascara was down his face, black streaks covering his cheeks.

Hyunjin glanced around the room. "Don't you have wipes?"

Felix shrugged. He didn't remember. He hadn't checked his "sex drawer" for weeks. 

Hyunjin sighed at his lack of communication, opening the drawer where the lube previous was. Surprisingly- or not so surprisingly- there were bottles of lubricant and wipes in there.

Hyunjin grabbed some wipes and ran them over Felix's face, completely smearing his makeup before getting it off successfully. 

He then threw the wipes to the side, brushing Felix's hair behind his ears. "You look better like this.. softer, cleaner."

Felix moved from Hyunjin's touch. "Only if it's part of the sex, Hyunjin. I mean what I said before." He was referring to the soft touches.

Hyunjin's heart broke again, I can't even touch you anymore? Instead he leaned down, taking a deep breath before placing his lips over Felix's, kissing him softly, as if afraid he might break. 

Now, while kissing him, he brushed his hair behind his ears and held his soft cheeks. If this was the only way Felix would let him, then so be it.

He pulled off, admiring the cutie in front of him. "So pretty, Felix.." he said, Felix looking him in the eyes, but before he could respond Hyunjin just kissed him again. It seemed it was fine for him to compliment him as long as it were while doing something intimate. 

Hyunjin kept kissing him, still standing over Felix, position a bit awkward. 

Instead, he moved to rest a knee between Felix's legs, leaning on the bed too. He deepened the kiss, holding Felix's chin softly with his fingers.

Felix didn't move away, nor did the say anything. He just let Hyunjin kiss him. 

Nothing indicated that he hated it, but nothing showed he liked it either.

Hyunjin pulled off, glancing at Felix's soft pink lips. A slight coat of spit covered them. "Your lips are so soft."

Felix pursed his lips, not meeting Hyunjin's eyes. 

Hyunjin stared softly at him, almost cautiously, as if scared.

Well maybe he was scared. What if this was the last time he'd ever see Felix again?

"Felix," Hyunjin practically whispered, waiting for Felix to look at him.

He did, but slowly, hesitantly. "What..?"

"I'm sorry." Hyunjin apologized again. 

Felix glanced away, either annoyed or sad, Hyunjin didn't know.

"Just do what you paid for.." Felix whispered, gaze down.

Hyunjin's eyes darkened, and he stood up straight. Felix shot him a suspicious glance until he saw him unbuckle his belt.

Right. He wasn't leaving, he was stripping. Obviously.

Hyunjin got rid of his belt, discarding of his pants, pulling his shirt over his head in one swift movement.

Felix bit his lip nervously, eyes roaming Hyunjin's toned body. His arms, his abs.. just keep your eyes on anything but his briefs, he told himself.

Hyunjin ran a hand through his hair, sucking in a breath, as if mentally preparing himself for what he was about to do. 

He figured maybe he could talk to Felix if it were while... fucking him.

That seemed to be the only way possible anyway. Felix was being a bit.. stubborn. 

Hyunjin moved quickly, getting one arm under Felix's thighs and one around his back to pick him up, moving him to lay in the middle of the bed.

Hyunjin reached for the lube, laying it beside Felix.

He admired the younger for a bit. How he looked a bit flustered, shy and.. excited?

No, probably not.

Hyunjin supported his weight on his forearms, kissing Felix's neck carefully, obviously finding his sweet spot and abusing it to get any reaction out of Felix.

All he got were some muffled whines. 

Felix was obviously trying to hide his pleasure. 

He wasn't going to be able to for long.

Hyunjin sucked his skin, leaving a deep, maroon-like mark there. Felix didn't say anything, just kept his eyes elsewhere and had a hand covering his mouth.

Hyunjin used his own hand to move Felix's hand out of the way, pinning it down on the mattress. 

"I don't like when you cover your mouth." Hyunjin said, and Felix briefly looked at him, but didn't say anything.

Hyunjin bit his lip, but his eyes didn't leave Felix's. "I paid for you, so I deserve to hear the sounds you make." 

Felix's eyes narrowed. "You don't deserve anything from me." his voice was small and nervous.

Hyunjin's breath hitched, then he swallowed. "Why not? I paid, didn't I? I thought you were willing to do whatever your clients wanted."

Felix stayed quiet, then muttered. "But.. you're not like the others.."

Hyunjin frowned. "How so?"

Felix sighed. "You're not just a stranger.. and.. we're only here because you paid a lot."

Hyunjin clenched his jaw. "Only because of that? Not a single part of you agreed because.. you missed what we could've been?"

Felix exhaled shakily. "Just do your job and leave."

Hyunjin forced a chuckle, "My job? This is your job. In fact, I should have you do the work yourself."

Felix glanced nervously at Hyunjin who sat up, looking down at Felix. "Can you ride?" the older asked, Felix's breath hitching.

"I... I mean I can, but..." 

"But what?" Hyunjin raised a brow.

Felix bit his lip nervously. "It's not something I usually do nor prefer, so I'm not.. like.. the best."

Hyunjin nodded as if understanding. "Well you can practice now, then." he said, glancing down at Felix's body. "Do you need prep?"

The younger nodded. "Yeah, I haven't... done anything in a long time."

Hyunjin nodded. "Do you wanna do it yourself or should I?" he asked.

Now what kind of question was that? He wasn't going to ask Hyunjin to finger him, but it felt like a humiliation ritual fingering himself while Hyunjin watched. 

"Uh.." he thought for a couple seconds. "I don't-" 

Hyunjin licked his lips. "I can just do it if you want." he must've noticed the youngers hesitation.

Felix blushed but nodded nonetheless. "Yeah, that's fine.."

Hyunjin wrapped his fingers around Felix's briefs, tugging at them and removing them in one single pull, and despite it being the.. what.. fourth time they'd done this- it was still as awkward as the first- if not more.

Hyunjin was quick to throw the underwear on the floor, opening the lubricant bottle and squirting a decent amount onto his fingers, rubbing it around to at least attempt to heat it up a bit- just to make it less uncomfortable for Felix.

He brought his fingers to Felix's entrance, circling the rim with his pointer finger. 

The younger squirmed a bit, not daring to look in Hyunjin's direction.

Hyunjin didn't mind, he was sure he'd get the younger to look at him sooner or later anyway. 

He pushed his pointer in.

It was a tight push- Felix really hadn't done this in a while, it seemed- going until his finger was fully buried inside the younger. 

Felix had his eyes squeezed shut, hand over his mouth.

Hyunjin hummed as he dragged him finger out, then pushed it in again, going in uncoordinated movements between soft drags and harsh thrusts, quick and slow movements, anything to just make the younger let out a noise. 

It definitely worked at times when he caught the younger off guard, getting a little whine or moan here and there, smirking approvingly to himself afterwards. 

When he felt it was time, he added his second finger, right beside the first, pushing in slowly just so the younger could feel it.

But still he didn't look at Hyunjin, nor did he say much.

Hyunjin leaned down, head hovering over the youngers dick which was now.. rather hard, resting closer to his stomach than before.

He used his free hand to wrap around the base of the younger's cock, teasingly licking it's head, soft lips wrapping around it, sucking.

Felix finally shot him a glance, peeking over his fingertips and exhaling shakily, a low moan escaping his lips.

Hyunjin smirked, bringing Felix further into his mouth, fingers still moving in and out of the younger, waiting for the right moment to add a third.

Felix shifted his hips, a movement somewhere between trying to move away from Hyunjin's mouth and thrusting up into it.

It just made Hyunjin feel more excited, to be honest.

He took Felix's whole length into his mouth, just as he added a third finger, making Felix hiss. From the stretch, or from the pleasure? Maybe it was both, Hyunjin wasn't sure.

All he knew was that he wasn't complaining, so it couldn't have been bad.

Felix's hands clenched into fists, moving to grab the sheets further down the bed to ground himself. With his hands no longer covering his mouth he was letting out way more frequent, desperate sounds. 

He moaned, squeezing his fists tighter, hips thrusting up towards Hyunjin against his better judgement. 

It felt good because it was sex. Stimulation on his pleasure parts- it was only natural to feel this way- whether it was someone you hated or loved, sex was sex.

He convinced himself he would have felt this good no matter who it was.. but.. realistically there was a difference in sex with Hyunjin and his other clients- but he wasn't going to admit that. Not outright to Hyunjin at least.

He threw his head back, arching his back, instinctively reaching a hand out to wrap around in Hyunjin's hair. He wouldn't have done it on purpose... it was just a natural response to the pleasure.

"Fuck- Hyunjin... I think it's enough... I'm stretched enough-" he said, out of breath.

Hyunjin removed himself from Felix's cock, hand going to jerk him off instead. "I think you need a minute more." he said. He couldn't deny the rush of excitement shooting through his body when the younger called his name- maybe he wanted to keep going to hear him moan his name like that again...

Felix shook his head, hand falling from Hyunjin's locks. "No- I'm not- I'm not good with too many orgasms... if I come now- I can't perform as well as you want me to later.."

Hyunjin dismissed him. "It's fine. I think you can take it."

Felix's eyebrows furrowed, thighs shaking a bit. He looked at Hyunjin. "I can't." 

"You can." Hyunjin encouraged him.

Felix's angry expression quickly faltered, eyes softening, mouth widening- indicating he was close... really close.

Hyunjin smirked, hand tightening around Felix's cock, fingers continuously hitting at Felix's prostate. "Just this once..."

Felix bit his teeth together- whining loudly, shutting his eyes.

"Fuck- fuck, fuck.." he moaned, Hyunjin delivering one last stroke before Felix released- spilling all over Hyunjin's hand and his own stomach- moaning and panting heavily.

Hyunjin continued fingering him through it, still jerking him off- now also with his own cum- until the younger was lying like a limp baby on the bed.

Hyunjin slowly removed his fingers from inside Felix, hand sliding off of his cock, admiring the younger's flushed and exhausted state.

Honestly, it was a view he thought he'd never see again.

It was the most beautiful view ever, something no amount of money could buy.

Well.. in this case maybe, but aside from that, Felix's beauty, everything about him, it was unreal.

Hyunjin would do anything to see this view every day.

While Felix caught his breath, Hyunjin wiped his hands off with a wipe, discarding of his own briefs- which now had a pretty big bulge hiding underneath- and sat on the bed beside Felix, waiting for him to calm down again. 

It didn't take too long. Felix eventually glanced up at Hyunjin, pushing himself up to sit. 

He shot a glance at Hyunjin's cock, his own dick twitching, then swallowed. 

"Oh, right. You wanted me to.." he said, moving onto his knees, slowly moving to hover over Hyunjin.

It was embarrassing.. it felt way too intimate and intense, but what could he do about it? He'd gotten paid to do this, and he was sure he could take two orgasms. That was doable.. as long as Hyunjin didn't expect more.

He positioned himself over Hyunjin's cock, reaching a hand down to find it, aligning himself up to it- and getting.. stopped?

He felt Hyunjin's hands grip at his waist. He looked at Hyunjin confused. 

Hyunjin smiled, "Don't you want to put some lube around my cock first?"

Felix blushed, then realized Hyunjin's dick was only slicked with a bit of precum. 

"Oh.. right. I was just about to do that." Felix said, reaching for the lube and popping open the bottle, squeezing maybe a little too much out, drowning Hyunjin's cock in it.

He shot Hyunjin a glance and went back to what he was about to do. The good thing was that now, at least he'd gotten time to calm down form his previous orgasm, and now just felt normal again.

He lowered himself onto Hyunjin's cock, the head sliding in easily. Felix whimpered, instinctively moving a hand to Hyunjin's shoulder to help support himself. 

It was around halfway down it got a little difficult.. he remembered Hyunjin was big, but he already felt full like he usually did in this position.

"It feels bigger like this.." Felix admitted shamelessly, lowering himself further. 

Hyunjin hummed in acknowledgement, hands still gripping at the younger's waist. "Is that good or bad?"

Felix shot a glance at him. "I don't know." he said, lowering himself further, feeling Hyunjin really deep in him now. 

He slapped Hyunjin's hands off of him, wanting to do it himself, continuing till his ass collided with Hyunjin's hips.

They both let out a little groan, Hyunjin pressing his lips together tightly, Felix doing the opposite, mouth hanging open. 

He felt.. different. This was very different. Hyunjin felt way bigger, a little bulge poking at his stomach from the inside.

Felix clenched at the sight, Hyunjin hissing. 

Felix shook the thought from him, lifting himself, then lowering himself. 

It'd been a while since he last rode someone, but he was sure he could do it. Hopefully it just wouldn't take Hyunjin too long to finish..

Felix moved his free hand to Hyunjin's other shoulder, riding him the best he could, trying not to make eye contact, swallowing his own moans before they could escape.

He couldn't find his prostrate well like this, but he didn't mind. That just meant he wouldn't get too overstimulated from this. In fact, it was probably better the less Hyunjin made him come.

Hyunjin threw his head back, hands moving to Felix's thighs instead, resting there, occasionally squeezing the flesh.

Felix tried to ignore it, quickening his movements, but getting tired after a while.

Well moving up and down continuously for several minutes was pretty harsh on the thighs- it had his shaking- and with the fact that he didn't even feel pleasure from this- he just felt full- it quickly bored him, giving him no reason to want to continue other than for Hyunjin's sake. 

Since when should he care so much about Hyunjin..

But.. Hyunjin cared for him. Maybe he was the asshole in this situation after all..

Hyunjin obviously noticed his slowed movements. "Is it hard?" He asked.

Felix shot him a glance. 

Hyunjin thought the younger misunderstood. "Riding me, of course."

Felix chuckled, but shut it down quickly. "I think it's pretty clear that both you and riding you is hard."

Hyunjin did notice how Felix's thighs shook, the answer should've been obvious..

"Well.." Hyunjin's hands crept back up to the younger's hips. "Let me help."

Felix hesitated, but Hyunjin didn't wait for an answer. He just began moving Felix up and down on his cock. 

Felix didn't say anything, but he didn't mind. In fact he appreciated it, his thighs were getting sore. 

The only down side to Hyunjin moving Felix as he pleased, was that he now purposefully searched for Felix's prostate too, which was only going to drain Felix further out.

Felix wanted to reassure Hyunjin that he didn't need to come, but Hyunjin had just said he wanted Felix to try multiple orgasms. What a great situation to be in.

Well this whole situation was terrible. He didn't even want to acknowledge the fact Hyunjin was buried deep inside him- that he was riding his cock. 

But he didn't have to think about it, because when Hyunjin actually hit his prostate he was once again brought away from his thoughts and into a state of pure bliss. His hands squeezed Hyunjin's shoulders, releasing a deep groan. 

Hyunjin's face remained focused, hands continuously moving Felix in the right angle to hit his prostate every time, basking in Felix's soft sounds.

Felix whined, shutting his eyes and attempting to not focus on the amounts of pleasure he was given at the moment, but more so every other part of Hyunjin. He focused on the shape of Hyunjin's arm muscles beneath his hands, on how Hyunjin's hands gripped at his waist- then his hips. On how his ass collided with Hyunjin's hips, on how deep Hyunjin reached.

But that's not what he was supposed to focus on. Damn, he was supposed to think of anything but his cock inside him. It was hard.

With how it constantly brushed his sweet spot, stretching him, how could he not pay attention to the amazing feeling?

His head dropped, bangs falling in front of his face as he moaned. "Ah shit.." 

Hyunjin gave Felix a little squeeze. "Is it okay?"

Felix sobbed. "Yes- it's fine." because the last thing he was going to do was not give Hyunjin the service he paid for, right?

"Mm.. that's good." Hyunjin groaned, also now thrusting up into Felix at the same time as he pulled him down, only intensifying the feelings, making Felix clench his teeth as to not scream out in pleasure.

Well it wasn't like he was going to anyway.

But still, just to be safe. 

He let a few whines and moans escape here and there, but for the most part, he held them back.

He felt so much at the same time it was overwhelming but good. It was the type of feeling where you didn't know if you wanted more or less, but it wasn't like he was in control of that in the moment anyway. 

Hyunjin definitely wouldn't let him back out of this orgasm, so so be it.

It didn't take long for him to feel close anyway. Naturally he was sensitive from his first orgasm, and with how fast things were going now it would only make sense for this release to come so soon.

And it did. 

He clenched around Hyunjin, hissing. "I.. I'm close... Hyunjin-"

"That's good. Come for me baby." Hyunjin groaned, also feeling his release near. 

Felix's world stopped spinning for a moment at that name. It was strange, why did he feel like that? 

It wasn't as if he'd missed the name or anything... It just took him by surprise, of course.

Felix snapped out of that brief haze, moaning as he stared at Hyunjin's face. "Shit.."

Hyunjin delivered a few more thrusts before pulling Felix down on him, shooting his load deep inside.

Felix came too the second he felt Hyunjin's release inside him, thighs shaking beside him, letting out a strange sound between a moan and a sob- head dropping to rest on Hyunjin's shoulder. 

One of Hyunjin's hands stayed on Felix's hip, whereas the other moved to caress Felix's cheek. "Shit.. you're squeezing my cock so tightly- did it feel that good?"

Felix only sobbed louder when Hyunjin asked that. 

Hyunjin kept caressing him, using his hand to raise Felix's head and look at his tear-streaked cheeks. 

Felix's nose was lightly tinted pink along with his cheeks and eyes. He looked so cute.

Hyunjin kissed the younger's tears away, afterwards placing a deep kiss on his lips. 

It was as if he'd momentarily forgotten what'd happened between them.

Felix seemed to have forgotten as well, kissing Hyunjin back. 

They stayed like that for a bit until Felix started sobbing again. 

Hyunjin pulled away from him- surprised- and studied his face. 

"What's wrong..? Why are you crying?" He asked softly.

Felix shook his head, wiping his tears with his hands. "No, this is so wrong.." he sobbed.

Hyunjin frowned. "What's wrong?"

Felix sniffled. "I shouldn't do this to myself.. I shouldn't have agreed to this in the first place- why.. why am I literally having sex with you? This is so wrong.." he cried.

Hyunjin felt his heart ache at Felix's words. "Lix-"

"I just know I'm digging myself deeper into this terrible hole I won't be able to get out of." he continued sobbing. 

Hyunjin's jaw clenched. "What terrible hole?" 

Felix sobbed, looking everywhere but at Hyunjin. "I.. I don't.." he sucked in a breath. "I can't do this-"

Hyunjin had worry written all over his face. 

Felix's hands squeezed Hyunjin's arms. "I'll.. I'll fall in love with you again and I can't do that to myself.. I can't do this."

Both Hyunjin's expression and heart cracked. "..You say that like it's the worst thing that could happen."

Felix let out a weak, bitter laugh. "It is. I hate you, Hyunjin. I barely put myself back together after.. whatever the fuck happened last time.. how am I supposed to live with myself if it happens again?"

"I won't let it happen again," Hyunjin said quietly.

"And you say that now?"

"I mean it now." He said, gently cupping Felix's face. "I was confused- I didn't know what you wanted before- but I'll do better now.. That is.. if you're even being serious?"

Felix sniffled. "Why would I lie about falling in love with you?"

Hyunjin bit his lip.

"And you think words are enough anyway? You think just saying sorry fixes everything? I've heard hundreds of apologies before but none matter if the person doesn't actually do anything to fix what they've done." Felix continued.

Hyunjin's thumb ran over the tear that ran down Felix's cheek. "I'll do whatever it takes if it means you will give me a chance.. at something more than just.. this. I don't want my only way of being with you to be fucking you- I hate it.

Felix furrowed his brows. "What does that even mean? What are you willing to do anyway? There's not much you can do."

Hyunjin took a deep breath, thinking. "..How deep in debt are you?"

Felix furrowed his brows. "That's private." 

Hyunjin's hands lightly squeezed Felix. "Your tuition.. how much more do you need to pay? I'm not going to misuse the information. You can tell me."

The silence between them was suffocating. Felix's lips parted momentarily, but no sound came out.

After a minute of thinking, he spoke. "I don't know.. like 20 million? Maybe 25..."

Hyunjin sucked in a breath. "That's.." he thought.

"A lot? I know, and that's not even counting rent or grocery money." Felix cut in.

Hyunjin stayed silent, and Felix almost laughed at the absurdity of it all. "Then.. I'll help you pay it."

Felix glared at Hyunjin like they weren't speaking the same language. "Stop bullshitting with me." he furrowed his brows, looking almost angry at Hyunjin.

"I'm serious! I have nothing to use money like this on anyway! If this is what it takes, let me help you."

"I don't want your help." Felix said, hands on Hyunjin's chest as if he wanted to push him away. "I don't want to owe you anything."

Hyunjin gripped Felix's hand into his own. "You won't need to owe me anything."

Felix's brows stayed furrowed. "I don't want you helping me out of pure guilt and spite! I would want someone's help if they really cared, not just cause they feel bad."

Hyunjin intertwined their fingers. "I am helping because I care! You know that- you just won't accept it- and for what? You think I'm going to pay all that just to throw you away?"

"Yes?" Felix chuckled incredulously. "Maybe that is what I think."

Hyunjin's eyes narrowed. "I'm offering it because I love you and I care about you. I'm not trying to win you over with money- I'm just trying to prove that I care. I wouldn't do this for anyone else.."

Felix looked.. almost disgusted. "I don't believe that. You have so much money.."

"No. My parents do. I don't have nearly as much money as my parents. I just have enough to do my own things.. maybe buy a new car.. food for months.. but not enough to just throw 20 million around carelessly at whoever's heart I want to break. I wouldn't do this for.. someone I didn't love."

Felix's eyes saddened. "You don't love me."

"I do!" Hyunjin swore. "I swear on everything."

Felix glanced at their hands, then back up at Hyunjin. "I don't want you to spend so much on.. someone like me. I don't want you to think I'm just with you because you helped me out of debt.."

Hyunjin bit his lip. "I don't care. I don't care if you leave me or ghost me. Just let me help. Even if.. it doesn't fix what we have- or rather, had- I'll just be happy knowing I helped."

Felix's previous expression was gone, now just looking sad. "I can't do that.. That's mean.."

Hyunjin clenched his jaw. "I don't care."

"But I do!" Felix whined. "I don't want to hurt you like that! That's- so mean."

Hyunjin met Felix's eyes. "Why do you care if you hurt me or not? Just let me help."

Felix froze.. why did he care? He should be glad if he hurt Hyunjin back if anything. 

"I shouldn't care.." he whispered.

Hyunjin breathed deeply. "Then why do you?"

Felix didn't know what to say, instead just staring at Hyunjin with tear filled eyes. 

Damnit, he wasn't supposed to cry either. He dropped his head, sighing. "I.. I can't stand you! How am I supposed to not fall in love with you? It's so annoying- you're so annoying!" 

Hyunjin was taken by surprise, eyes momentarily widening. Was that a good or bad thing?

Felix spoke through angry tears. "You're so fucking charming and attractive and.. it's so easy to believe you're a good guy! Fuck.. maybe you are a good guy. It's so hard not to fall for you- I hate it! I hate you- I hate how much I like you- everything about you! It's so frustrating. I love you.. I can't stand it!" he sobbed, hiding his face behind his hands.

Hyunjin took a second to process it all, hands gently running through Felix's hair. "Felix.. I am a good guy, I swear. And I love you too, of course I do. Can't you give me a second chance? I promise I won't hurt you again. I swear on everything. Just.. let me help you, and maybe.. we can also try again after that..? It won't hurt."

Felix kept his face hidden. "What if it does hurt? What if you leave me?" he asked, still sobbing.

Hyunjin grabbed Felix's wrists and carefully pulled his hands from his face. "Then at least you're no longer in debt and have no stress, right? You can focus on friends and school instead."

Felix sniffled. 

Hyunjin continued, "Please just give me one more chance.. give us one more chance. I promise I'll make it worth it." he spoke softly.

Felix's cheeks were wet and flushed. He didn't know what was right to say- if this was real or not. He felt drunk even though he hadn't drank anything- drunk off of sex? Love?

"I'm just scared." he whispered.

Hyunjin's thumb ran over Felix's hands. "I know, but I promise I'll make sure nothing bad happens to you ever again."

Felix's eyes shot back and forth between Hyunjin's. "..Do you mean it..?" he asked carefully, fully expecting to either get laughed at or wake up, but neither of those happened. 

"I mean it." Hyunjin confirmed. "I can take care of your tuition for you, and I'll always be here if you need me- or anything else for that matter."

Felix chuckled despite his state, sniffling. "I don't want you for money.."

Hyunjin smiled. "But I want to do this for you. Just this once. Let me pay it for you."

Felix's eyes were as soft as ever. "It's 20 million.." 

Hyunjin knew it was a lot, but he didn't care. "I know.. but you're the love of my life- I don't think I could ever want anyone other than you, so please let me.."

Felix's hands landed on Hyunjin's abdomen, nails digging into the skin lightly. "You won't think I'm just using you for money..?"

Hyunjin shook his head. "No. And even if you do, I don't mind." he said, hand cupping Felix's cheek. 

Felix pursed his lips, "..and you're sure? It's a lot."

Hyunjin smiled, pressing a quick kiss to Felix's lips. "How many times are you gonna ask me that?"

Felix blushed. "As many times as it takes for you to realize I'm not worth it."

Hyunjin's gaze softened. "Well then you're going to have to ask me until the day I die."

Felix smiled almost shyly, and Hyunjin took it as a sign to kiss Felix, passionately, deeply. 

Who would've thought this could've happened from Hyunjin just hiring Felix as a prostitude for one night a couple months back?

Definitely not Felix.

Good thing was, they had the apartment for themselves for another two days before Seungmin returned- along with the rest of their friends.

Felix smiled into the kiss, hands cupping Hyunjin's cheeks too.

...

It'd been a couple months since then.

Felix had gotten the new job at the clothing store, finishing his last shift before Christmas break one evening, helping lock up the store.

When he'd done so, he turned around in the cold winter air to see Hyunjin across the street, waiting for him. 

Felix smiled and approached him- checking the road for cars first- then jumping into his arms. 

"Baby.. didn't I tell you to wear more in this cold weather?" Hyunjin playfully scolded, tightening the scarf Felix had on around his neck.

"It's okay Hyunjin! I'm not so cold." Felix reassured, but Hyunjin had already taken his own hat off to put on Felix's head instead, snowflakes quickly landing on Hyunjin's dark hair.

Felix smiled and pressed a kiss to Hyunjin's lips. Warm in contrast to the cold weather surrounding them. 

"Come on, now." Hyunjin smiled, linking his arms with Felix. "We need to hurry if we want to make it in time before my parents serve the Christmas dinner." he reminded, Felix nodding.

They were a little distance from Hyunjin's home, but decided on walking instead of driving.

Maybe it was the nice atmosphere, dark sky, street lights and snow that caused them to make that decision.

Or maybe, just each others company..

Whichever it was, they were just glad they'd gotten here, able to spend Christmas with Hyunjin's parents- whom for the record, happily adopted Felix into the family- together, no stress, big friend group, able to survive the remaining years of college thanks to each other.

Seungmin had also started dating Hyunjin's friend, Chris. 

And Felix better introduced Jisung and Changbin to Jeongin and Hyunjin's other friend, Minho.

It was a little chaotic, but they made it work. 

And to be honest, Felix never thought he’d make it this far.

He thought he'd gotten to the point of no return after losing that job at the restaurant, but really, it just taught him that there always was a way out- even in the people you hated and didn't imagine you could ever forgive.

But Felix was glad he forgave Hyunjin. Even after his debt was taken care of, they made it work. Sure, they had their ups and downs, but Hyunjin was the best boyfriend Felix could ever imagine, and he was so forever grateful for him.

Grateful for his friends,

Grateful that he didn't have to work in that field any longer,

And grateful he'd found a new family.