Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

“Is this really necessary?” Ron asks. The entire team is at Global Justice headquarters having various tests done.

“All agents must undergo annual physicals.” Dr. Director explains. “We include the blood draws to make sure we know what blood type you are and that you’re healthy.”

“That makes sense, I guess.” Ron says. “I’m just not comfortable with all of this.”

“They’re not supposed to be comfortable.” Dr. Director says. “But they are necessary.”

A weird noise sounds in the room. Dr. Director walks over to a monitor and checks on it.

“Hmm…strange.” Dr. Director says.

“What is?” Will asks.

“It appears that some old blueprints were stolen less than an hour ago.” Dr. Director explains.

“I’m going to assume these blueprints are for something dangerous.” Monique says.

“Yes.” Dr. Director explains. “They used to belong to Drakken.”

One of the few times when everyone gasped.

“Ron, Will, you’ll be recovering them.”

Shego and Drakken walk in at that moment.

“Hold it, Doc.” Shego says.

“I am not sending you two due to the conflict of interest.” Dr. Director explains.

“How about our kids?” Drakken asks.

“Your kids?” Ron asks. “Why would you want to send them?”

“If they’re going to keep doing dangerous stuff to help people, they might as well get some field training.” Shego says.

“What dangerous stuff?” Will asks.

“Patti threw herself in front of a car because it was about to hit a kid.” Shego says.

“That’s not dangerous for me.” Patti says.

“Bea ran into a burning building to get a kid out.”

“I wore a mask!” Bea exclaims.

“Eric climbed into a storm drain to rescue a kitten.”

“I couldn’t just let it drown!” Eric says.

“I’m proud that you all want to help.” Shego says. “I just want you to develop some more skills to do it. Especially because you’ve said you want to be superheroes.”

“Wes and Wen have done dangerous stuff too!” Bea exclaims.

“They’ve already had more training than you.” Shego says. “Even if it was subpar.”

“Alright.” Dr. Director finally says. “They can come. But they’ll need costumes.”

“I’m sure Monique can design stuff for them.” Ron says.

This should be interesting.

***

“Not that we’re not grateful for the jail break,” Adrena Lynn says, “but why did you bust us out?”

She’s standing in a dimly lit office. Camille Leon is next to her. The woman behind the desk doesn’t even turn around.

“I have a job for you two.” Miss Gray says. “The folder on the desk contains the details of what I want you to steal, where it is, and when to take it.”

Adrena picks up the folder and she and Camille look through it.

“What do you want this for?” Camille asks.

“That’s not for you to know.” Miss Gray says. “You are to retrieve it.”

“And if we refuse?” Adrena asks.

“I could just turn you over to the authorities and let you rot in prison.”

“I’ll do it.” Camille says. “As long as it keeps me out of prison.”

“Well, I’m up for something daring.” Adrena says.

“This deadline is in three days!” Camille exclaims.

“How do you expect us to meet that?!” Adrena asks.

“By working quickly.” Miss Gray explains. “I do not tolerate failure, so you better get started.”

“On it.” Adrena says.

I’ve got a bad feeling about this…

Chapter Text

“So, which of your dad’s plans were stolen?” Ron asks.

“A rocket.” Eric says.

“Honestly, it’s one of the least dangerous things he ever built.” Bea says. “Also, I have to complain about these costumes. What’s with the all-white?”

“You’ll have to ask Monique.” Ron says. “I guess she didn’t have time to add the colors.”

“Which rocket?” Will asks.

“Huh?” Eric asks.

“What do you mean?” Bea asks.

“Your father has built a few things out of rockets.” Ron says. “Which rocket’s plans were stolen?”

“Some kind of hyper thingy.” Bea says.

“The hypertronic devastator drone?!” Ron exclaims.

“That’s the one!” Bea exclaims.

At the look of horror on Ron and Will’s faces, Patti speaks up:

“This is bad, isn’t it?”

***

“How, exactly, are we going to break into a secure government facility?” Camille asks.

“Well, we could always just literally break in.” Adrena says.

“And get stopped by several highly trained agents before we even get near what we’re looking for!”

“You got a better idea?”

“Actually, I just might…”

***

A bad day at work for Agent Cognito usually involves tearing one of his disguises.

Not getting knocked out by a former stunt star.

So, this is a very bad day at work.

***

“So, how, exactly, are we going to find whoever stole the plans?” Ron asks.

“Well, they stole a digital copy.” Eric says.

“And GJ put digital trackers on all the digital copies of dad’s plans.” Bea says.

“So that if someone downloads a copy, or steals one, we can track the signal and know where it’s going.” Eric says.

“Brilliant.” Will says.

“All we have to do is head there.” Bea says.

“Who’s jet are we taking?” Patti asks.

“Mine has snacks.” Ron says.

“Ron’s!” Everyone says.

Well, hard to argue with that.

Chapter Text

“So, what would someone even want with plans for a hypertronic devastator drone?” Ron asks.

“Other than the obvious?” Will asks.

“I mean, it’s not as though there aren’t better weapons out there.” Ron says. “The drone had it’s gyroscopic control unit on the outside. Kind of an obvious weak point.”

“Noted.” Will says. “We’ll be sure to give the villain advice when we encounter them.”

“Okay, we don’t want to do that.” Ron says. “But the drone isn’t very dangerous compared to some of the other devices out there.”

“So, the question is, why would someone steal these plans specifically?” Eric asks.

“Maybe they’re a fan of dad’s work.” Bea suggested.

“Maybe they wanted to make improvements.” Patti suggested.

“Whatever the reason, we’re closing in on the location.” Will says.

“Everyone remember the training we went over?” Ron asks.

“Yes.” Bea, Patti, and Eric say.

“Good.” Ron says. “Because your first field mission starts now.”

***

“Hey, Agent Cognito, back so soon?” Another agent asks.

“Got called in to a meeting.” Camille says.

“Ugh. I hate those.”

“Tell me about it.”

“Well, I better not keep you.”

“Better not. Wouldn’t want me to be late.”

“See you around.”

***

“Okay, we got into the building.” Adrena says. “But how are we going to find the lab we want?”

“There are signs pointing to the lab.” Camille says. “And keep it down! Your suit may make you invisible, but that doesn’t mean you can’t be heard!”

“Ugh, fine.” Adrena says. “Lead the way.”

***

“Freeze!” Ron says while busting into the warehouse.

“Oh, hi!” Their villain says.

“Frugal Lucre?!” Ron exclaims.

“Please tell me we’re not fighting this guy.” Will groans.

“Hey!” Lucre says. “I take offense to that!”

“No offense.” Ron says. “You’re just not very high on the danger scale.”

“How is that not offensive?” Lucre asks.

“Good point.” Ron says.

“So, do I punch him yet?” Patti asks.

“No.” Ron says. “First, we find out what his plan is.”

“Glad you asked!” Lucre says. “I plan to unleash the hypertronic devastator drone on the world unless they surrender to my whims.”

“But…this drone is only big enough to threaten a small city at a time.” Patti says. “And you’re apparently planning to only build the one. It’ll easily get taken down by any Air Force. Maybe even a Marine Corps. This plan only has about a 23% chance of succeeding.”

“Huh. I hadn’t thought of that.” Lucre says. “I don’t suppose you guys can wait for me to build more?” Lucre asks, sheepishly.

“No.” Will says.

“Fair enough.” Lucre says. “Snapping turtles! Attack!” He pulls a cord that unleashes a bunch of snapping turtles on them.

Patti instinctively curls herself around them.

At least it’s not monkeys!

Chapter Text

“So, Lucre got away.” Ron explains. “And someone gave him advice on how to be a better villain, so we should be looking out for him in the future.”

“But, if there’s one good thing out of this,” Eric says, “it’s that we were able to delete the file.”

“That is good.” Dr. Director says.

“And we were able to find a good home for all those snapping turtles.” Bea says.

“That’s good to know.” Dr. Director says. “You’re all dismissed for now.”

***

“So, explain these results to me again.” Joss says into her phone.

“Your DNA is that of a normal human.” Olivia says. “Your powers aren’t genetic or due to any kind of mutation. They’re something else.”

“The only thing that comes to mind is ‘mystical’.” Joss says.

“I wouldn’t be surprised.” Olivia says.

***

“So, why did you call us?” Gil asks.

“Yeah, I have a tournament starting soon.” Zita says.

“I’ll make this quick.” Wade says. “These are your DNA test results.”

“Do we have any genetic conditions we’re predisposed to?” Gil asks.

“Fraternal twins.” Wade says.

“What?” Zita asks.

“Having fraternal twins in your family makes you more likely to have them in the future.” Wade says. “And you two are fraternal twins, so it’s more likely one of you will have them if either of you has kids.”

“We’re what?!” They exclaim.

“I should work on my tact.” Wade says.

***

“Well, our first chance at being heroes was a bust.” Eric says.

“Hey, you’ll get actually threatening villains someday.” Shego says.

“And it’s not a complete failure.” Drakken says. “You were able to delete the blueprints from his computer. Trust me, Lucre won’t be able to memorize the plans. You’ve greatly slowed him down.”

“Even if I did give him advice on how to be a more threatening villain.” Patti says sadly.

“A slight mistake you won’t make again.” Drakken says.

“And your first instinct was to protect us.” Bea says. “You’re not incapable of doing good.”

“Thanks.” Patti says. “But that still doesn’t mean I have what it takes to be a hero.”

“You’ll get there.” Sheila says. “I didn’t have what it takes when I started out.”

“And I’ve never had what it takes.” Drakken says. “But if this is what you want, we’ll help you do it.”

“Thanks.” Patti says.

“Now, who wants muffins?” Drakken asks.

“I want a costume that’s not entirely white.” Bea says.

“Oh yeah, she sent those to us too.” Shego says. “No idea why.”

***

“We got the stuff you wanted.” Camille says. “Still not sure why you needed people to break into somewhere to steal slime.”

“Once again, Miss Leon, it’s not your job to know.” Miss Gray says. “But, since you did complete your job, you will be rewarded. There’s a case of money for each of you. Feel free to count it.”

“Thanks.” Adrena says.

“Keep your ears open.” Miss Grays says. “I might have other opportunities for you in the future.”

“Got it.” Camille says.

But I’m not sure I should accept.

***

Miss Gray calls Ubel from her office.

“Ubel, how long until Project: Nike is completed?”

“It’ll take a month, ma’am.” Ubel says. “We just got the final components.”

“Is there any way you can shorten the time?”

“Not without massive instability. The project wouldn’t last more than a few days if we rush it.”

“Fine. A month. And not a day longer.”

“Of course, ma’am.”

“And do make some weapons for Shego that aren’t energy based. She’ll need it in the future.”

“Right away, ma’am.”

She hangs up on Ubel.

“It’s not easy being in charge,” Miss Gray says to herself, “but someone’s got to do it.”

***

Kim is in her dorm room when she gets an email notification.

She opens it and immediately video-calls her project partners.

“You’re kicking me out?!” Kim asks angrily.

“Yes.” One of the guys says.

“Look, you do good work,” one of the girls says, “but you’re not letting us do anything.”

“And participation is part of the grade.” The other girl exclaims.

“And you’re missing deadlines!” The other guy exclaims. “Despite the fact that you’re falling behind, you still won’t let any of us do anything!”

“We talked to the professor.” The first girl says. “We’ll do our project, you do yours.”

“You can’t do that!” Kim says. “I was the group leader!”

“None of us agreed to that.” The second guy says.

“You just started giving orders and expected everyone to listen.” The first guy says.

“But leadership is more than that.” The second girl says. “And leaders are chosen by those they’re in charge of. Otherwise, they’re dictators.”

“You still have plenty of time to finish your project.” The first guy says. “But we’re not going to fail with you.”

They all sign off.

Being in charge is a hard job! Someone’s got to do it!