Archive of Our Own ^beta

Gabi falls ill on a Tuesday morning in Spring, having woken with a slight chill. 

She thinks little of it and goes to work. Now that they are older, Gabi and Falco have begun to help with restoration efforts and peacekeeping more frequently. It is clear that Falco is better at diplomacy than Gabi, but Reiner and Miss Pieck have assured her that she will always have a role with the Ambassadors if she should like one.

"One day," she tells them. They are only nineteen, after all. For now, both are content with helping Mister Levi run his tea shop. 

Gabi’s head begins to pound on the short walk to the store, and her vision swims from time to time. She manages to slip past Mister Levi who is busy serving customers and takes a moment to herself in the backroom. He notices that she is quieter than usual but, for the most part, doesn’t comment. 

By midday, a deep, persistent cough has settled in her chest. Everything feels sore and congested. Gabi takes pride in her strong immune system and has never missed a day of work—save for the one time Mister Levi sent her home with the flu. She tried to argue, but he insisted she was scaring off customers.

Today, she is dangerously close to leaving on her own accord.

The bell above the door rings, and Gabi hears a familiar set of voices. Falco, having taken the day off to see Onyankopon off to the ports, has brought him in to say goodbye. He will be away on business in the coming weeks. When Falco approaches her at the counter, Gabi decides she will ask him to take over her shift.

“There you are!” He grins. He snakes his arms around her waist from behind, craning down to press a kiss to her cheek. 

With more effort than she expected, Gabi turns to face him, grabbing his forearms to steady herself. “Hey,” she smiles, but it doesn’t quite reach her eyes.

Falco frowns. “What’s wrong?”

Suddenly, the ground jolts beneath her, and she wobbles on her feet. Falco’s grip on her tightens, but she can barely feel it. A prickly sensation surges through her arms and legs. Gabi blinks, but the world does not stop spinning. She opens her mouth, only to find that she cannot hear herself speak properly. Black spots begin to cloud her vision, and she is suddenly aware of how hot the room has become. 

Whatever she does or does not say concerns Falco deeply. “Mister Levi!” He calls. 

Gabi cannot say for sure what happens next, but one look at her and Mister Levi’s entire demeanor changes. He wastes no time. “Onyankopon! Fetch the doctor!” 

Everything has turned hazy, and she is so, so hot.

“Falco,” she murmurs. 

Her knees give out beneath her and she collapses, limp, in his arms. 

—

The Sweat, they call it. 

It is highly contagious, and characterised by a sudden onset of fever, profuse sweating, dizziness, and a build up of fluid on the lungs. Unlike other epidemics, it strikes in the warmer months, spiking and receding very quickly. Death can occur within hours, and is typically imminent. 

Levi has never heard of such a thing. Though, apparently, it was not unheard of in Falco’s intermittent zone. He says it was only known to affect the rural populations of Marley but, with post-Rumbling migration, diseases have spread easily in recent years. 

“Has she come into contact with anyone who might have been a carrier?” The doctor asks. He is a kind man, and treated Levi’s leg often following the war. 

Falco hesitates. “I don’t think so, but she works at the tea shop.” He says quietly. He does not look at Levi. “It’s popular. She meets a lot of people.”

The doctor nods. Levi cuts in gently, asking what they can do for her. 

The doctor glances at Gabi, who Falco carried back to their house before he arrived, with a grim expression. 

“Keep her comfortable.” 

—

Of course, Levi does not accept that. After a little probing, the doctor gives them a vial of medicine to administer in the event that Gabi wakes. He tells them that no matter how delirious she becomes, they must keep her warm so that she can possibly sweat the fever out. They should not attempt to force food or drink for 48 hours, assuming she lives that long. 

Falco is a wreck, and rightfully so. Gabi has not been lucid since she collapsed at the store, and grows notably worse by the hour. They have set her down in the guest room of the house that the three of them share, courtesy of Queen Historia. Gabi and Falco decided to move in together after her parents opted to return to the newly reconstructed Liberio Intermittent Zone, and they insisted Levi join them. Onyankopon planned to travel more often this year, and they did not want him to live alone. He was more than capable these days but, truth be told, he enjoyed their company.

Gabi shakes uncontrollably for hours, but it is never clear whether she is too hot or too cold. One moment she kicks feebly at the blankets, the next her teeth begin to chatter. She sweats profusely and her skin is clammy to the touch. They try to comfort her and ask her what she needs, but she cannot hear them. By nightfall, she seems aware of their presence, but her responses are completely incoherent. She slips in and out of fever dreams, unable to make sense of anything.

“Falco!” She cries suddenly. Falco and Levi practically jump out of their seats. 

“I’m here, Gabi!” He says, clasping her hand tighter in his. He reaches out to smooth her hair back. It is slick with sweat and sticking to her skin. “You’re okay, love. What is it?” 

She moans and jerks her head away from his touch like it burns. “Falco, we’re late.” 

He falters. Levi lowers his head into his hands. They are both too stunned by the situation to say much of anything to one another. Rather, they sit in silence and watch over Gabi like hawks. Falco often leans in to whisper softly in her ear, pressing kisses to her temple. Levi knows that he should tell him to stop, that her condition is contagious, but he cannot bring himself to do so. Instead, he dabs at her forehead with a clean tea towel, catching the fresh beads of sweat as they form. 

It is almost dawn when Levi finally gathers the strength to leave in favour of rest. He considers curling up in his chair like Falco inevitably will, but he is not as young as he used to be. His back and leg muscles have been prone to spasms since the war. It is hard to walk away, but he knows someone should stay awake with Gabi at all times, and Falco looks like he’ll pass out by lunchtime.

He is undoubtedly exhausted, but sleep does not find him easily. 

—

In his dreams, Levi’s fallen comrades come to visit. 

It is not entirely unusual, but his night terrors have grown increasingly less common over time. Tonight, Petra stares at him with accusing eyes. Her bones jot out of her skin at odd angles. 

He thinks of all he could and could not have done to save her. 

—

“Is there any change?” Levi asks, stepping back into the room. He comes bearing two mugs of steaming hot tea and a plate of thinly sliced bread with jam. 

Falco glances up. His eyes are bloodshot from a mix of exhaustion and tears. He shakes his head no. 

— 

On Thursday afternoon, it is Levi’s turn to watch over Gabi alone. Falco has finally accepted that he is of no use to her in his current state. He cannot get any real rest in the chair beside her bed, though nobody can deny that he tried. He excuses himself to go and sleep in the room he shares with Gabi, but implores Levi to wake him at the slightest change. Indeed, her condition has worsened. But she has lived this long. 

In the height of her fever, she speaks often of being a good Eldian, and more often of the Armoured Titan still. The term ‘devil’ slips out once or twice. Levi is sure that he knows Gabi as well as he ever could, but the things she says surprise him. Naturally, she asks for Falco. But she calls out to Commander Magath almost as frequently. Then Reiner. And a surprising number of times to the War Chief. 

She does not cry out for Levi. 

He knows that it probably means very little—Gabi may not even understand what is happening-–but Levi forces himself to swallow the sting of it. She yearns for Zeke of all people. She wishes that somebody else was here to take care of her. It hurts, knowing she doesn’t need him in the way he now understands he needs her. It hurts, knowing that he cannot give her what she needs. 

By nightfall he is certain that she will not live to see the morning. She thrashes about in pain and discomfort, tears mingling with sweat on her cheeks. 

“It burns,” she sobs, over and over again. 

Her breathing has grown more ragged and she gurgles from time to time. Angry tears prick at Levi’s eyes, and he takes her frail hand in his. The sheer heat of her skin almost makes him flinch. It’s like she is boiling from the inside out. 

He knows he should fetch Falco now. But he also knows that once he does, once the boy is at her side, Levi will no longer have the space to grieve. He’ll have to keep it together, for Falco. For everyone.

“Oh, kid…” He whispers, voice low and hoarse.

For the first time since the Rumbling, Levi feels something inside him buckle. His chest aches with it: A deep, bruising kind of grief that has not yet come to pass. The girl in the bed is not a member of the Corps. She is Gabi—headstrong, infuriating, brilliant Gabi—and he loves her like a daughter. Over the past few days, he has thought frequently about how to support Falco in navigating a world without her in it. Now, he realises an ugly truth:  He cannot imagine such a world himself, and it is not a world he could ever want to exist in. 

Levi Ackerman is not a religious man. But in this moment, he is unsure what else he can do. And he must do something. He closes his eyes, her fingers still entwined with his, and clasps his hands together. 

“Please.” He whispers, the word catching in his throat. Hw cannot recall the last time he did this. He does not know where to start, or if there are any particular phrases he should use. “Please don’t take her from me. She’s mine. If anybody is listening, if anybody gives a damn…I’m begging you, let her live.”

She whimpers again, twisting weakly in the bed. Levi leans closer, resting his forehead against their joined hands, and lets out a shuddering sob.

“I can’t lose her too. Please. I love her. I love her. Please. She’s just a kid.” 

He grips her hand tighter, half-hoping that he can will her back to life. Gabi squeezes his fingers in return, though he is certain it is just a reflex. He dissolves into a fit of sobs. Over half an hour passes before he can regain a semblance of composure, and Levi remembers that he should have summoned Falco long ago. He announces that he will be back shortly and goes to wake him. 

When he opens the door to Falco's bedroom, he finds that he is already awake. He sits on the floor with his back against the wall, knees drawn to his chest, sobbing. It is a terrible sight. If Gabi dies, he will lose both kids, really. Falco could never be the same. Levi sinks to the floor beside him, ignoring the twinge in his knee. Falco tenses, aware of his presence, but it is several minutes before he can speak. The silence between them is thick, suffocating. He has been in his head for days.

Levi knows better than to blame himself for Gabi’s condition. Children die awful deaths everywhere, all the time. That’s the way it has always been. Still, he wonders if Falco is blaming himself—if he thinks that he should have been at the shop instead, or that he should have noticed she was sick sooner. Falco’s entire life has revolved around protecting Gabi. It would make sense, Levi supposes. 

“I’m sorry,” Falco blubbers. “I c-can’t stop.” 

When he finally lifts his head, he is more relieved than surprised to find that Levi is crying too. Without warning, he lunges forward, burying his face in Levi’s shoulder. They stay that way for a long time.

— 

Magath looks at him with pained understanding. Children are not supposed to die sudden, painful deaths in the new world. 

— 

On Saturday, Gabi’s fever finally breaks. 

Her lids feel heavy and her body aches, but she blinks open her eyes. The room is dim but the first light of dawn has begun to creep in through the curtains. There is a weight on her chest–something thick and pressing. She tilts her head to the side. Her vision swims, then comes into focus. 

Falco is seated at her bedside, slumped forward onto the mattress. There are dark circles under his eyes and his hair is tousled. He looks as if he hasn’t slept in weeks. She tries to wrestle her hand from his grasp and shake him awake, but she cannot find the strength. Rather, she opens her mouth to speak and feels a rush of mucus in her chest. 

Suddenly, she jolts upright. She attempts to suck in a breath and feels herself choke. Gabi coughs haggardly, again and again. Falco snaps into a sitting position, instantly alert. His eyes are wide and disbelieving. She is lucid, he can tell. Then, he explodes into motion. He grabs the metal bucket by the bed and scrambles to sit behind her. He steadies the pail in front of her with one hand and claps her back with the other. She spits up fluid—thick and warm. There is momentary relief, then another breath catches in her throat.

“That’s it,” he murmurs. “Cough, Gabi, cough!” 

By the time she is finished, the sun is fully out.

—

“Mister Levi!”

Falco has near kicked his bedroom door down. Levi blinks, pen paused mid-sentence. He is in the middle of finally penning a letter to Reiner, having woken up early to do so. Falco is dazed and, apparently, lost for words. They stare at each other, frozen. 

He can’t bring himself to ask. Ink drips onto the parchment. 

Then: “She’s awake.” 

—

Levi can barely believe his eyes. 

Gabi is sitting up in bed. Or, she is slumped against the headboard in an upright position. She looks weak, but she no longer trembles. Some colour has returned to her cheeks. “Surprise.” She croaks. Her voice is low and hoarse, but she appears to be in good spirits. Levi can only stare. 

Falco races to be at her side again, plumping the cushions behind her back. She scrunches her nose and swats him away feebly. “Falco, stop fussing.” There is no real bite in her tone. Falco must agree that she sounds terrible, because he reaches for the glass of water on her nightstand and holds it to her lips, urging her to take a sip. He has already opened the windows and drawn back the curtains, airing out the room. 

A lump forms in Levi’s throat. He swallows it down, and eases himself onto the mattress.   

“You look better.” He says finally. 

She nods, “I feel better.” 

It is clear that she feels worse than she lets on when she allows Falco to spoon feed her mashed banana. The doctor had warned against administering her medicine on an empty stomach. Her throat is dry and inflamed, so they don’t dare force any solids. Falco and Levi do their best to inform her of what she’s missed. They do not tell her about having cried on the bedroom floor, but Falco does not hold back otherwise. 

“I was so scared, Gabi.” He says earnestly. “You’re my entire world.”

Naturally, Gabi has less to say, but she tells them all about how she dreamt of her time as a warrior candidate. Her visions were namely of the war against the Mid-East Alliance. But, in the height of her fever, she dreamt the candidates were trapped in the steam of Bertholdt’s Colossal Titan, running for their lives.

“I’m not sure why,” she says. “I never even met Mr Hoover.” 

For a moment, Levi feels rather silly. Then, she grimaces, curling onto her side. She pushes the heel of her hands into her eyes. Levi tenses. 

“My head hurts.” She mumbles. “It’s the light, I think.” 

Falco jumps to his feet, and darts out of the room. “I’ll brew your medicine. The doctor said you can have it with tea, so it tastes nicer.” 

Levi huffs a short laugh. He moves to draw the curtains shut. “I imagine you’ll have him eating from the palm of your hand for a while.” 

“Mm. Don’t think I couldn’t hear you, old man,” Gabi teases. Her words are slurred with exhaustion, but a tired smirk touches her lips. “You prayed for me.” 

Levi blinks. He does not know what to say. “Tch.”

Then: “Mister Levi!” Falco calls. “Did you move the sugar?”

Levi rolls his eyes and limps toward the door. The lack of sleep, combined with hours of sitting on the floor beside Falco in stiff, awkward angles, has caused his knee to flare up. He will need to find his cane before it gets any worse. 

“Wait,” Gabi murmurs. Her fingers twitch, as if she is trying to reach for him but doesn’t have the strength. 

He turns back and crouches beside her, so that their eyes are level. He finally takes her hand in one of his, gently smoothing her hair back with the other. “What is it, kid?”

“I’m sorry I scared you,” she whispers.

He gives her fingers a soft squeeze and offers the smallest smile.

“I’ll be back in a minute with your tea. It will knock you out again, but you need the rest.”

She nods, eyes already drifting shut.

He pulls the blanket up to her chin and presses a kiss to her hair. Then he stands—and leaves, without another word.

—

Gabi returns to work within the next week, far quicker than expected. She complains of being cooped up inside.

Everybody is relieved.

—

Isabel and Farlan frolic in the meadows. 

Erwin and Hange stroll languidly behind them. 

Levi thinks, perhaps for the first time, of not only what he’s lost but what he’s gained. 

He stops dreaming after that.