Chapter Text
The day had arrived. Six months gone in the blink of an eye. And that meant only one thing. Cuddy’s maternity leave had officially ceased, and Princeton-Plainsboro Teaching Hospital was calling her name. She supposed she should have been grateful to have been able to enjoy as much time off as she had. Not many were fortunate enough to have as much time to spend with their newborns and Cuddy was lucky enough to be in the financial position to do so. But as much as she was looking forward to returning to work, she couldn’t shift the guilt of leaving her daughter behind.
After House’s return from Mayfield, they’d begun an extensive search into finding a nanny to care for Isabella. When they met Marina, they knew instantly she’d be a good fit. She came by to help Cuddy on days when House was at work and Izzy had seemed to form quite a bond with her. Really, they couldn’t have found a more perfect person. But still, this would be the first time their daughter would be left alone with someone other than Cuddy or House. And the thought was terrifying.
“She’ll be fine.” House said, attempting to reassure her.
“Easy for you to say. You’ve been back at work for two months already. You’re used to not being with her every minute of the day.” Cuddy sighed, applying her make up with a shaky hand. God, she felt sick. “What if she gets upset and we aren’t there to comfort her? What if she thinks we’ve left her?”
“Stop that now and listen to me.” House replied in a firm but caring tone. “You know Marina has this handled. Izzy likes her. She will be okay. And I know that as soon as you step foot in those hospital doors, all this worry will ease. You’ve got this.” He leant down and gave her a kiss on the cheek. “Besides, as much as Izzy needs you, so do I. The interim dean’s ass wasn’t as fun to stare at as yours. And for some reason he got funny when I made wise cracks about his boobs.”
Cuddy couldn’t help but chuckle a little. “Well, I’m glad to hear that Dr Howard’s masculine features weren’t enough to persuade you to run away with him. Although I do worry that sometimes Wilson might sway you.”
“Sex with him isn’t as fun, believe me. You’re much more vocal during.” House quipped, leading to Cuddy giving a playful whack on the chest as she turned around to face him.
“Okay, how do I look?” Cuddy asked, gesturing to her outfit.
House’s eyes drifted up and down Cuddy’s body before focusing on the way her cleavage sat in her blouse. Oh yeah, she was back. “Definitely better than Dr. Howard.”
“Stop looking at my breasts.” Cuddy retorted, rolling her eyes.
“What? I’ve missed following them around at work.” he chuckled. “Seriously, you look great. Very ready to restore order to the hospital once again. Can you start by letting me fire my team?”
“You’re not firing them, House. From what I’ve heard, your new team has been more than efficient.”
During his time in rehab, House’s diagnostic team had disbanded with Chase and Cameron opting to work in the ER instead. When House returned, he was greeted by the return of only Foreman…and a new team who had been hired in his absence. He hadn’t quite gelled with them yet, much to the surprise of nobody.
“But Mommmm.” House whined.
Their conversation was quickly interrupted by the cooing noises coming through the baby monitor.
“I’ll resume my pleading later.” House said, kissing Cuddy before walking out the room to get Izzy out of her crib.
Cuddy took a deep breath in, returning to face her reflection in the mirror. “You can do this.” she said to herself.
After finishing getting ready for the day, she walked into the kitchen and was greeted to Marina feeding Izzy her breakfast whilst House nursed a cup of coffee.
“I’ve made your tea. It’s in your thermos.” House said before turning his head to a babbling Izzy who seemed to be greatly enjoying her porridge. “I still don’t get how she can eat that stuff.”
“It’s good for her.” Cuddy said, taking a sip of her tea before walking over to kiss her daughter on her head. “Is that nice, baby?”
“How are you feeling, Lisa?” Marina asked as she brought another spoonful to Izzy’s mouth.
“I’m okay. I just know I’m going to miss her so much.” Cuddy replied, eyes welling up as she gazed down at her baby. “Please call me in the day to let me know how she’s going.”
“Of course.” Marina smiled, not taking her eyes off Izzy. “We’ve got a fun day planned, haven’t we? Baby rhyme time at the library at 10 and then we’ll go for a visit to the park after your nap.” she explained to the smiling girl in her highchair.
Cuddy smiled as she wiped the stray tear trickling down her cheek. “Thank you, Marina.”
House watched the interaction with a knowing expression as Cuddy lingered by the highchair, her fingers smoothing over Izzy’s dark hair. “You know if you keep hovering, she’ll get suspicious. Like you do when I hover around you.”
Cuddy let out a shaky breath, forcing herself to step back. “I know. I know. It’s just…harder than I thought it would be.”
Marina reached for Izzy’s sippy cup and offered Cuddy a reassuring smile. “It’s always tough the first time. I remember when I left my daughter when I went back to work. But when I got home, she was as happy as anything and it reminded me why I made the right decision to return to work. Children are resilient. And as much as Izzy will always need you, the hospital does too. She’ll be okay. And I promise I’ll take great care of her.”
“See?” House smirked. “Told you to listen to me. It’s like you forget I’m the rational one in this family.”
Cuddy shot him back a look, grabbing her briefcase off the kitchen table. “Sure you are.”
He grinned, clearly pleased with himself before taking another sip of his coffee.
Checking the time, Cuddy knew she couldn’t stall any longer. She crouched down by Izzy’s highchair, running her fingers gently along her chubby little arm. “Mommy and Daddy have to go to work now, baby.” Her voice wavered slightly. “But you heard Marina. You’re going to have so much fun.”
Izzy, oblivious to the emotional weight of the moment, babbled happily, banging a tiny fist against the tray. Cuddy smiled, but it didn’t quite reach her eyes. She pressed a lingering kiss to Izzy’s cheek, inhaling her baby-soft scent as if she could somehow take it with her.
“Come on, you. I’ve got to get to work before my boss kills me for being late and you’re my ride.” House said, popping a quick kiss on Izzy’s head as he rubbed small, soothing circles on Cuddy’s back.
Cuddy swallowed hard, forcing herself to straighten up. “Okay, let’s go.” She grabbed her keys with a determined nod before turning back to face Marina. “Call me. Even if it’s just to tell me she’s sneezed.”
Marina chuckled. “I will.”
As she turned to walk towards the front door, House followed behind closely, swiping a box of tissues on his way out. “She’s definitely going to need these in the car.”
“Have a good day!” Marina called to them.
As soon as Cuddy slid into the driver’s seat and shut the car door, she felt herself getting choked up once again. Her hands clenched the steering wheel so tightly that her knuckles turned white. She felt like her whole heart had been left behind in that highchair with Izzy.
House climbed into the passenger seat, tossing the box of tissues onto her lap without a word. “Go on. Get it all out of your system now before we get there. You don’t want to walk in in your first day back looking like a racoon.”
Cuddy sniffed, reaching for a tissue as the tears spilled over. “God, I feel stupid. I’ll be home before she even realises I’m gone.”
“Exactly.” House replied softly. “And she’s happy. She was practically having a love affair with that bowl of mush. She’s not sitting their crying for you.”
“I know.” she whispered, dabbing at her eyes. “But what if she does later?”
“Then Marina, who need I remind you is literally being paid to handle it, will handle it.”
Cuddy exhaled slowly as she nodded, but the ache in her chest didn’t ease. “I just feel like I’m abandoning her.”
House shifted in his seat, putting his arm around her shoulder. “You’re not. You’re doing what people do. You’re showing her that life doesn’t stop just because you love her. You’re showing her that you can work and still be the best mom.” He paused, watching as she wiped her eyes again. “Look, I know it sucks leaving her. But you are doing the right thing for her, for me and for you.”
She let his words sink in, absentmindedly playing with the tissue box in her lap.
“I get it, you know.” he continued. “I mean, I didn’t cry. Well not until I walked in and saw that Foreman had stuck around. That was devastating.”
Despite herself, Cuddy let out a watery chuckle. “I’m sure it was.”
“But the whole leaving part? Yeah, it was crap.” he admitted. “First morning back, I sat in my office for a solid twenty minutes looking at the clock and willing time to speed up so I could come home to you both. Kept thinking about how you and Izzy were probably having a much better time than I was. I’d already missed two months of Izzy’s life whilst I was in Mayfield and I hated that I had to miss more time with her. Didn’t help that my new team had already gotten on my nerves within my first interaction with them. Honestly, it took everything in me not to walk right out, hop on my bike and come back home there and then.”
“You never told me that.” Cuddy replied, placing a hand on House’s knee.
“Yeah, well. Didn’t want you think I was getting even softer than I already have done.”
“Too late.” Cuddy smiled.
House sighed dramatically. “Don’t go telling anyone that. Anyway, if I survived leaving my girls behind, you’ll be okay too. And when you come home, Izzy’s going to look up at you with those insanely big blue eyes like you’re the best thing in the world.” He paused before breaking into a teasing grin. “Which you know is only half true since I also exist.”
Cuddy rolled her eyes but couldn’t fight her grin. “You really can’t help yourself, can you?”
“How long have you known me?”
Taking one last deep breath, Cuddy discarded the tissue in her car door and chucked the tissue box back onto House’s lap. “Okay, let’s do this.”
“Watch out, Princeton-Plainsboro. Cuddy’s back.” House nodded approvingly.