Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

Direct Messages: Kurt Hummel to Mercedes Jones

Thursday, 8:38 p.m.

Hummel Boy <3: Cedes

> I have a great idea

> Pick up pleaseeee!!

> Answer me woman!

Mercy J: dont call me woman Kurt we are 17 years old

> and what?

> if youre gonna try to get me to help you convince artie to put hot pink striping on his wheels again you already know the answer

Hummel Boy <3: OK First of all

> Artie will cave in someday JUST WATCH

> But no.

> Picture this:

> New Directions OFFICIAL GROUPCHAT PART TWO!!

Mercy J: respectfully

> theres a reason its part 2 the first one was disastrous

> and why would I want to be in another groupchat with rachel berry she ruined it in the first place

> also

> youre not even in the new directions anymore??

Hummel Boy <3: Well, yes but

> Just think about it, Mercedes!

> We made that groupchat at a really rocky time in New Directions

Mercy J: when are we not in a rocky time?

Hummel Boy <3: But I believe everyone is at a pretty stable point in our dynamic now!

> And I know that I'm technically a Warbler now, I just miss being in on McKinley drama right away :(

Mercy J: that's why you need to come back right now!!!

> also stable?

>did rachel and finn not just break up right after sectionals in the messiest way ever

Hummel Boy <3: We choose to ignore that.

>It will be fun!

Mercy J: I will not be taking part

Hummel Boy <3: Did I say you had a choice?

> Love you, mwah!

Mercy J: sigh

Read 9:02 p.m.

***

Kurtstylin created a new chat!

Thursday, 9:07 p.m.

Kurtstylin added MissJones, ChangWithFangs, artieabruhms, Rhythmike, brittbrittluvsu, LopezTana, samiamevans, QFabray, hudson05, RealRachelBerry, ZizedUp and puckmeister to the chat.

Kurtstylin changed the chat name to “New Directions 2: Here we Go Again”.

Kurtstylin: Greetings, everyone!

QFabray left the chat.

Kurtstylin added QFabray to the chat.

Kurtstylin: Not so fast.

ChangWithFangs: again

> i thought we all agreed last years gc fucking sucked

artieabruhms: ???

> I agree with tina what is this

Kurtstylin: Just say you guys hate fun

LopezTana: no

> we just hate rachel

> :)

RealRachelBerry: Real mature.

Rhythmike: correction, we hateD her

RealRachelBerry: Thanks, Mike.

Rhythmike: you're welcome! :D

brittbrittluvsu: i miss dat chat

> it felt like i wuz watching dance moms

> but if no 1 had talent

ZizedUp: that sounds awful

> Im in

RealRachelBerry: I’m not even going to entertain that.

> Anyways, you're not even in the New Directions anymore, Kurt!

> I love you, but we can’t just spill our secrets and let it get to the Warblers.

hudson05: kurt wuldnt do that

Kurtstylin: Thank you, Finn

> It’s wouldn’t*, btw!

hudson05: nevermind fuck u

Kurtstylin: I'm telling Carole

> Guys call the police Finn just broke into my room to chuck a blunt object at my skull!

hudson05: it was a scarf

MissJones: calling right now!!

> you’re goin away for a longgg time pal

Kurtstylin changed hudson05 to The McKinley Madman.

The McKinley Madman: dam

samiamevans: OMG

> groupchat!?!

> I'm so excited

LopezTana: poor man

> he does not know

>the horrors of being in a gc with berry the convo destroyer

RealRachelBerry: I’m done with this.

> You guys obviously don’t want me here.

> I cordially thank you for the invitation, Kurt!

> But I must go.

RealRachelBerry left the chat.

Kurtstylin: Why’d you guys scare her off

> I’m working my ass off trying to get this to work

> It’s so lonely being the last person to hear about everything!!!

MissJones: I told you it wasn’t going to work babe

ChangWithFangs: you knew about this horrendous plan and didnt warn us??

> im starting to rethink our marriage

Rhythmike: …

> mercedes when were you gonna tell me you're married to my girlfriend

MissJones: OUR girlfriend

> <3

ChangWithFangs: <3

Kurtstylin: ENOUGH!

> If I add Rachel back will you guys pinkie promise that you’ll be nice to her??

> Please

> She’s like 90% gossip

> I can’t live without knowing her business

> I see you guys all reading my messages

> Say “I will” if you promise

ChangWithFangs: …

Kurtstylin: Or no more Blaine updates.

MissJones: I will

ChangWithFangs: i will

artieabruhms: I will I guess

ZizedUp: sure

Rhythmike: I will!

samiamevans: I will :DD

LopezTana: I won’t

QFabray: I don’t want anything to do with this

The McKinley Madman: i will

> but not for blaine updates i already hear enough at home

> just change my name to something normal

Kurtstylin: Fine.

Kurtstylin changed The McKinley Madman to Hudsinner.

Hudsinner: dude

> whatever

> i dont even care anymore

LopezTana: you spelled every word right bitch tits

> I’m so proud

Hudsinner: can we kick santana pls

LopezTana: any gc would die without me and you know it

brittbrittluvsu: tru!!! <3333333

Kurtstylin: Here Finn, I’ll give you admin so that you can change your display name yourself if you need it so bad

Hudsinner: omg thanx

> can u show me how 2 do that

Kurtstylin: No.

Hudsinner: fuck

puckmeister: holy shit

> can u guys shut the fuck up

> i wus takin a dump and ur fuckin texts made my phone buzz off the counter

Kurtstylin: Ew.

puckmeister: kurt ur so fuckin lucky my phone didnt brake

> what even is this

> hi lauren

ZizedUp: dont talk to me puckerman

puckmeister: she want me

QFabray: I thought we were discussing Rachel’s return to the groupchat???

Kurtstylin: OH YEAH

> Stop distracting me everyone

> I’m adding Rachel back and then matters will be discussed

> This groupchat WILL work!

LopezTana: ten bucks says it won’t last to regionals

Kurtstylin added RealRachelBerry to the chat.

RealRachelBerry: …

> Why did you add me back, Kurt?

> I said I was done.

Kurtstylin: I made them all promise to keep things civil

> Believe it or not I want to talk to you too

LopezTana: gross

> I’m gonna dip

> if you need me I’ll be looking over britt’s shoulder whenever she checks the chat

> otherwise leave me alone

brittbrittluvsu: shes alreddy doing it

RealRachelBerry: Aww, thank you, Kurt!

> I really miss you!

> We really need you to come back.

MissJones: you hung out with me and Kurt yesterday?

> and by hung out with us I mean you tracked us down at the Lima Bean and invited yourself to the table and then talked about Finn the whole time

Kurtstylin: I remember it like it was yesterday

> Because it was

QFabray: Plausible Rachel thing to do…

RealRachelBerry: That was a whole 24 hours ago!

> I’m a social butterfly, you can’t expect me to live off of only seeing you guys at Glee Club.

> Plus, that is an exaggeration. I only talked about Finn for the first 30 minutes.

Kurtstylin: You showed up at 4:00

> And then you left at 4:40

> The first 30 minutes was 90% of the conversation.

RealRachelBerry: Pfft.

> Who’s counting?

Kurtstylin: Me!!

> I was!!!!

Hudsinner: hello

> why r u guys talking about me

> what did rachel say

brittbrittluvsu: sum1 is obsessed

> capital w Weird -Tana

ChangWithFangs: now santana shows back up

artieabruhms: LMAO

ZizedUp: gotta agree with santana on this

RealRachelBerry: It was nothing!

> Plus, why do you care?

> You’re the one that broke up with me.

Kurtstylin: Putting a halt to this

> Rachel don’t make this groupchat a Finchel mess again

> I am begging on my hands and knees

ChangWithFangs: this is your fault kurt

artieabruhms: you brought this upon yourself

MissJones: you SAID you wanted to see McKinley drama first hand

> well here it is love

samiamevans: ooooo groupchat drama my fave kind

> rachel what did you say

QFabray: Please don’t start things, Sam

> You weren’t there last year

puckmeister: yup

ChangWithFangs: bad things happened

brittbrittluvsu: wait whoz changwithfangs

> its not lord tubbington

> i monitor his screentime and thats not 1 of his alt accounts

RealRachelBerry: That would be Tina, Brittany.

Kurtstylin: This is why God granted us the usage of display names in groupchats

Hudsinner: god???

Kurtstylin: Also known as Instagram Direct Messaging

Kurtstylin changed ChangWithFangs to Tina.

Tina: boring.

samiamevans: CAN I HAVE A COOL NAME

Kurtstylin: Depends!

> What do you have in mind

samiamevans: something badass

> like iron sam

> or spider-sam

> or

Kurtstylin changed samiamevans to Chappy Gilmore.

Chappy Gilmore: why

> what does that even mean

Kurtstylin: Hello

> I once saw you pull a chapstick out of one of those roll-up cloth knife holders

> That was filled entirely with other chapsticks.

> And you do that fucking Adam Sandler impression everytime I see you

> Look it was either that or Lambchop

Chappy Gilmore: WHY LAMBCHOP??

Rhythmike: just accept it, sam

LopezTana: back

> Kurt I’ll give you $20 if you change Berry’s name to Bilbo Haggins

Kurtstylin: I’m not doing that!

RealRachelBerry: Thank you, Kurt.

LopezTana: $30

Kurtstylin: I literally said I don’t wanna cause problems

> No

LopezTana: I have an extra Dior Oud Ispahan Parfum with your name written all over it

Kurtstylin changed RealRachelBerry to Bilbo Haggins

Bilbo Haggins: Kurt!!!!!!!!!!!

Kurtstylin: IT’S A HEAVENLY SCENT

Bilbo Haggins left the chat.

Kurtstylin: Damn

> When and where can I pick it up Tana

LopezTana: I lied

> I just googled the gayest Dior perfume and said I had it

> can’t believe it worked

Kurtstylin: WOW.

Kurtstylin changed LopezTana to Shun the Witch.

Shun the Witch: worth it!

Kurtstylin added RealRachelBerry to the chat.

RealRachelBerry: Kurt, can you knock it off?

> I do not want to be here!

> That was incredibly mean.

Tina: so was sending sunshine to a crackhouse

> i mean whattt who said that?????

RealRachelBerry: How many times do I have to tell you guys?

Tina: iT wAsNt AcTiVe

artieabruhms: “it wasn’t active!”

Shun the Witch: it wasn’t “ACTIVE”

Rhythmike: it wasnt an active crackhouse!

Kurtstylin: You guys had that at the ready god damn.

> Anyways, I’m sorry, Rachel

> I was blinded by Santana’s lies

> It won’t happen again

> I promise.

RealRachelBerry: I shouldn’t believe you, but…

> I also would not be able to handle a groupchat existing without me being a part of it.

brittbrittluvsu: butt theres already one of those??????

QFabray: Britt, don’t say another word

RealRachelBerry: I will act like I didn’t just read that.

> For the sake of peace.

Shun the Witch: for the sake of ur pride you mean?

RealRachelBerry: I will be turning my phone off and spending the rest of my night practicing for Regionals. I advise you all to do the same.

Kurtstylin: You guys have already decided on a setlist for regionals??

artieabruhms: we haven’t

> rachel’s just being rachel.

Kurtstylin: Oh.

> Yeah that checks out

> Btw, thank you all for letting me make this

> As much as I love it at Dalton, the gossip here is all just rich bitchy stuff

Chappy Gilmore: rich bitchy stuff?

Kurtstylin: Y’know like

> “Did you see that Calvin was wearing a fake rolex?!”

> “I heard that Gregory’s family had to downsize their maids from having 3 to now having 2”

> Relatable shit

Chappy Gilmore: i cant believe u go to school with those kind of people

Kurtstylin: It does get kind of isolating when things aren’t only about the Warblers

> But it’s better than getting my life threatened

> So there’s that!

Chappy Gilmore: i suppose

MissJones: I understand why youre staying there

> but just know were all here to protect you if you ever decided to transfer

> even finn

> right finn??

Hudsinner: of course i wuld

> would

Kurtstylin: Thank you guys

> I love you all so much

MissJones: we love you too!!!

Rhythmike: you left a kurt-sized hole in our hearts man

Chappy Gilmore: if you ever need anything just hmu

Kurtstylin: Of course I will.

> I’m going to go watch some Project Runway with my dad, so I’ll be heading off

> You’re welcome to join us, Finn

Hudsinner: nah im good

Kurtstylin: SMH

> Just call me a slur at this point

Hudsinner: !?!?!?

> thats not wut i was

MissJones: he’s messing with you, finn

Hudsinner: oh

> ok

> thanks mercedes

MissJones: of course :)

> have fun, kurt!

Kurtstylin: Will do!

> Goodbye, everyone!

> Hopefully this groupchat will survive past next week

Shun the Witch: it won’t

> nevertheless, cya later lady hummel

Kurtstylin: Thanks for the confidence Tana

> I wish I had that much trust in this

Shun the Witch: I am more than willing to share it

MissJones: I think I’ll be logging off too

> goodnight y’all

Hudsinner: night cedes

MissJones: goodnight Hudson

Shun the Witch: I’m leaving too

> I better wake up to see my name back to normal hummel

> or else…

Tina: or else what?

Shun the Witch: idk

> I just like threatening peeps

> gn

***

Direct Messages: Mercedes Jones to Finn Hudson

Thursday, 9:48 p.m.

Mercedes: hey finn

Finn: yws?

> yes*

Mercedes: can you please lmk if kurt seems to be struggling with Dalton

> I know he opened up a bit in the groupchat

> and he usually tells me everything

> but since he went to Dalton I feel like he’s kinda been drifting a bit

> I dont want him to do it alone

> sorry, this is a lot

> just, if something’s off

> dont be afraid to text me

> please

Finn: for sure

> dont be sorry

> your such a good friend for kurt

> hes so lucky to have you :)

Mercedes: thank you so much finn

> if you ever wanna reach out, outside of kurt-related problems

> never be afraid to text me as well

Finn: your so sweet

> have a good night mercedes

Mercedes: you, as well :)

Read at 9:59 p.m.

***

Direct Messages: Sam Evans to Kurt Hummel

Thursday, 9:51 p.m.

Sam: hey kurt

> sorry ik ur watching tv with ur dad or whtevr

> just wanted to let u know that im here if u ever just wanna talk

> or hang out

> i know what it feels like to stick out especially w rich people

> i know ur not broke or anything but just thoght id text you

> so yeah

> anyways

> have a good night :)

Friday, 2:05 a.m.

Kurt: Oh my God I am SO sorry, I crashed so hard on the couch and JUST woke up

> Thank you so much, Sam, this is so sweet!

> I will definitely let you know whenever I want to hang out

> We could totally just meet up at the Lima Bean whenever! Or if you prefer somewhere else, of course

> Hope you have a good night as well

> Or a good sleep, I should say

> :)

Friday, 7:05 a.m.

Sam: 👍

Read at 7:06 a.m.

Chapter Text

New Directions 2: Here We Go Again

Friday, 7:35 a.m.

Kurtstylin: Rise and shine my beautiful family

> The sun is gleaming

> The birds are singing

> And the groupchat survived the night

Shun the Witch: change my fucking name Kurt

Kurtstylin: Jfc

Kurtstylin changed Shun the Witch to Tana Banana

Tana Banana: you are going to regret you ever let your vocal cords stand anywhere near the choir room when I’m done with you.

Kurtsylin changed Tana Banana to Santana

Kurtstylin: This is why I’m too scared to go back

Santana: love ya like a sister

> smooches

> xoxo

Hudsinner: u gnna take my idea of kicking santana out the gc srsly now?

Santana: count chocula you will perish in 3 days

> 3 days

Hudsinner: jesus

RealRachelBerry: You can’t just threaten everyone around you, Santana.

> It’s not funny.

Santana: ok Rachel

> just cause you’re bitter that they scrapped your breakout role as Gizmo’s estranged daughter in Gremlins 3

> doesn’t mean you can take it out on me

Chappy Gilmore: oh my god

> santana makes nerd references

> one of us…?

Santana: who’s us??

> it’s just you Sam

> and referencing one of the worst yet most popular movies of the 80s isn’t nerdy

> it’s just being conscious

> you probably wouldn’t know that tho

Kurtstylin: Sam was just trying to bond, Santana, you can stop baring your teeth

Santana: ugh

> whatever, Britt’s here

> I wish I could say it was nice talking to y’all

Tina: does she ever stop?

QFabray: It’s how she shows her love..

> In a fucked up way

RealRachelBerry: Well, I’m getting sick of it.

> Aren’t you guys, too?

artieabruhms: no offense, Rachel

> but are you sure you should be the one making the calls on what and who we’re sick of

RealRachelBerry: Artie.

Kurtstylin: Stop, stop, stop, STOP.

> When I said I wanted drama, I didn’t mean BECAUSE of the groupchat

> Now play nice. Please.

MissJones: I didn’t say nothing

Kurtstylin: Anyways…

> Anything new?

> Exciting?

> Life-changing?

RealRachelBerry: Besides Finn dumping me?

Hudsinner: ok

RealRachelBerry: Nothing too crazy, Kurt.

> I mean it when I say we need you back.

brittbrittluvsu: yea

> i mean other then the whole santana thing

> thers noth

Kurtstylin: What do you mean “besides the whole Santana thing”?????

> Brittany tell me right now

> Brittany??

> Hello?????

> Can anyone fill me in !?!??!???

Tina: i have no idea what she means?

artieabruhms: yeah, what’s the santana thing brittany??

Kurtstylin: Rachel????

RealRachelBerry: Usually, I know a lot…

> But I don’t even know what she’s talking about.

Hudsinner: guys i just saw santana rip brittnay’s phone out of her hand mid text and sprint down the hall

> wut was that about

Chappy Gilmore: i can second that

> dude i swear i saw a trail of cartoon flames behind her she was going so fast

> weird

MissJones: SUPER weird…

Kurtstylin: Oh my God.

> I can’t even get the deets in the groupchat

> Why is God punishing me for choosing a hot man over my friends

> Just clarifying: that’s a joke. I left for my safety.

Rhythmike: ayo?

Kurtstylin: Don’t show that to Blaine.

Hudsinner: screenshotted

> i can finally have an upper hand for once in my life

> no more black mail for finn hudson

Kurtstylin: I will show Carole your browser history right now don’t fucking play with me Hudson.

Hudsinner: .

> i dont even have blaine’s # anyways.,

Kurtstylin: That’s better

puckmeister: just own it finn

> be like me

RealRachelBerry: There are about 50 thousand different reasons why Finn should NOT be like you.

ZizedUp: 100%

puckmeister: u just hate me cuz u aint me

MissJones: Yeah.

> thats why.

Tina: DEAD

Chappy Gilmore: are we just gna ignore the santana thing

> that was rlly weird right?

QFabray: Let’s let the Santana thing go.

> It’s probably something very personal

RealRachelBerry: Do you know what it is, Quinn?

Kurtstylin: Please.

> Tell.

> ME.

QFabray: No comment

Kurtstylin: YOU’RE KILLIN ME, Q!

QFabray: The bell just rang!

> Got to go!

> Ttyl, Kurt <3

Kurtstylin: Oh my G-O-D.

MissJones: I’ll keep you posted kurt

> talk to you later love

> have fun with blaine!

> ;)

Kurtstylin: I kind of have to

> Cause you guys are giving me nothing

artieabruhms: but I bet Blaine isn’t

> ;)

Kurtstylin: Hate you guys

> But I love you guys

> Stop making it so hard for me to decide whether I wanna go back or not

Tina: bet blaine is making it hard for you 2

> ;)

Kurtstylin: WHAT THE HELL

ZizedUp: ;)

MissJones: ;)

Rhythmike: ;-)

Chappy Gilmore: );

> oops

> fucked up

> ;)

> dsylaxia

> dysexlia?

> lol sex

RealRachelBerry: Dyslexia.

Chappy Gilmore: thank u rach

RealRachelBerry: Anytime. :)

Kurtstylin: Whatever

> See you guys later

> Any news comes STRAIGHT HERE

> Got it?

Rhythmike: ROGER THAT

Chappy Gilmore: SIR YES SIR

Kurtstylin: That’s more like it!

> Byeeee!

***

Direct Messages: Blaine Anderson to Kurt Hummel

Friday, 2:34 p.m.

Blaine <3: Hey, kurt!

Kurt :): Blaine!

> What’s up!

> How you are!

> How are you*!

Blaine <3: I’m great, kurt

> How are you??

Kurt :): Was starting to get bored in my Philosophical Figures in History class

> But then you texted :)

Blaine <3: Aww

> Well that’s great to hear

> Anyways!

> What are you doing after Warblers practice?

Kurt :): Well, I WAS going to see if Mercedes wanted to watch Days of Our Lives and laugh at the terrible plotlines

> But it’s not a plan that’s set in stone

> Why?

Blaine <3: Well, if you wanted to at all

> Do you wanna get something to eat?

> I need to ask you about something.

Read at 2:41 p.m.

Blaine <3: Is that a… no?

> Yes?

> Hello?

***

Direct Messages: Kurt Hummel to Mercedes Jones

Friday, 2:41 p.m.

Hummel boy <3: MERCEDES JONES

> PICK UP THE PHONE

> I THINK BLAINE ANDERSON IS ASKING ME OUT

> OH MY GOD

> OH MY GOD

> MERCEDES

Mercy J: SLOW DOWN.

> what did he say?

> how did he say it?

> Im so happy for you, kurt!!!

Hummel boy <3: ATTACHMENT: [screenshot.jpg]

> Am I just being crazy?

Mercy J: omg

> answer the fucking man kurt

> you left him hanging??

> what the hell else would this be

Hummel boy <3: Normally I'd doubt it

> But you're right!!

> What else would he want to ask me?

> I'll answer him when you help me figure out what to say

> I’M DYING HERE!

Mercy J: omfg you are so hopeless

> just say you’d love to!

> it aint that hard

Hummel boy <3: Mercedes I am a gay teenage boy in Ohio

> Everything I do is extremely hard

Mercy J: stop stalling and just text him!

> before he changes his mind

> I swear hummel, you will be the death of me

Hummel boy <3: You're right

> Sorry

> I’m just scared

Mercy J: it's okay to be scared, kurt

> but you deserve to fall in love, just like everybody else

> he definitely feels something too

> now hurry up and go get him!!!!!

> now!!!!!!!!!

Hummel boy <3: Thanks so much, Cedes <3

> I have no idea how I'd survive high school without you

Mercy J: I love you <3

> Im glad you reached out to me

> I just want you to know that you can still confide in me about anything, even if youre stuck at smelly Dalton

> beyond boy stuff

> ok?

Hummel boy <3: Okay.

Read at 2:48 p.m.

***

Direct Messages: Kurt Hummel to Blaine Anderson

Friday, 2:48 p.m.

Kurt :): I am so sorry

> Teacher almost caught me texting

> I would love to meet you for food after practice

> When and where would you like to meet up at?

Blaine <3: Phew!

> Thought you were ghosting me for a minute there, lol

> Meeting’s a hassle. Let's go in my car together right as practice ends.

> I’m feeling Chinese food.

> How’s that sound?

Kurt :): Perfect :)

Blaine <3: 😊

Read at 2:55 p.m.

***

New Directions 2: Here We Go Again

Friday, 5:54 p.m.

Santana: the next person that asks me about the

> incident

> this morning

> will get bitch slapped so hard they’ll be knocked to an alternate universe where my shit is actually your business to know

> got it

> looking at you Kurt

artieabruhms: damnnn

QFabray: I told you guys

Santana: thank you Quinn

> you can be cool once in a decade

QFabray: Thank… You…?

Tina: wait where IS kurt?

Rhythmike: he’s usually the first dude on here

> fighting to keep this chat alive

RealRachelBerry: Finn?

> Is Kurt home?

Hudsinner: he usually gets home like 20 mins after i do

> idk where he is

> prob flirting with blaine or something

Chappy Gilmore: is blaine rlly THAT guy

> i jst feel like hes not

brittbrittluvsu: i smelly some1 whoz jelly

Chappy Gilmore: ??

Santana: that was the gayest thing I’ve ever seen you say

> and that’s saying something

Chappy Gilmore: bruh

> i only said that cuz he didnt get my willem defoe impression the first time we met him

> it was sickening

Santana: yeah ok

Hudsinner: imma text kurt and ask where hes at

MissJones: y’all leave him alone

> Im sure hes got a good reason as to why hes not responding

> give him peace in these trying times

> thats all Im gonna say

Tina: whatever that means

MissJones: :P

Hudsinner: ok…

MissJones: anyways…

> are you guys fucking with the regionals setlist rough draft?

artieabruhms: not enough r&b

> needs more r&b

RealRachelBerry: This is *show choir*, Artie.

> We don’t need more R & B.

Santana: girl whatever

RealRachelBerry: Just my beliefs.

> You guys obviously don’t respect my input, so what does it even matter?

Santana: girl WHATEVER

RealRachelBerry: Anywho.

> You all better be practicing the choreography Mr. Schue went over today.

> I propose a girl’s sleepover where we rehearse it!

Santana: am I invited Berry?

artieabruhms: me too? 🥺

RealRachelBerry: As much as I want to tell you no.

> Yes, Santana is invited.

> Artie, though?

> No.

artieabruhms: I did all I could

Santana: REALLY???

> SOMEBODY PINCH ME, I MUST BE DREAMING!

> I HAVE BEEN INVITED TO LADY BERRY’S MANOR?

> pass

RealRachelBerry: Ha. Ha.

brittbrittluvsu: im going whereever santana goes

Santana: lucky for you, Britt, it’s not at Rachel’s!

>U wanna come over tn?

brittbrittluvsu: yasss

MissJones: I wish I could, but I gotta babysit tonight. another time

Tina: if cedes wont be there i cant

RealRachelBerry: Oh.

QFabray: .

> I can come over, Rachel

RealRachelBerry: You don’t have to. I’m not making you.

QFabray: No, it’s okay

> Plus I need a study buddy for my midterm.

> I’ll head over soon

RealRachelBerry: Thank you, Quinn.

> You can be a very nice girl, sometimes!

QFabray: These are not the compliments to me you guys think they are

Santana: I wanna use a specific word

> finn you know this word very well

Hudsinner: god dammit

MissJones: don’t.

Santana: ugh

***

Direct Messages: Quinn Fabray to Rachel Berry

Friday, 6:14 p.m.

Quinn: I’m on my way

Rachel: Great!

> Thank you again, Quinn.

Quinn: Of course

Rachel: I know you only did it because you felt bad.

> But still, I appreciate it.

> :)

Quinn: Rachel, stop feeling so bad for yourself

> Maybe I just wanted to hang out?

> I study better with a friend anyways

> Santana is a no go and Mercedes is babysitting

Rachel: Friend has a nice ring to it.

> But what about Sam?

> Aren’t you dating him?

Quinn: We never dated

Rachel: Oh.

> Ok.

Quinn: Almost there

Rachel: Stop texting and driving and just get here safe!

Quinn: 👍

> Don’t worry though, I’m using that voice text thing

Rachel: Oh, good.

Read at 6:22 p.m.

***

Direct Messages: Finn Hudson to Mercedes Jones

Friday, 7:59 p.m.

Finn: are u withkurt?

> hes usually home by now but he hasnt texted burt or me abt why hes not back

Mercedes: no, Im pretty sure hes with blaine :)

Finn: oh?

> like on a date?

Mercedes: ATTACHMENT: [screenshot.jpg]

> I dont know, you tell me

Finn: wutttttt

> im a lil offended he didnt tell me anything

Mercedes: Im sure he’ll tell you all about it once hes home!

> after he spills it all to me first, of course ;)

Finn: yeah, ur right

> at least i hope so

> ill be kinda pissed if he doesnt

Mercedes: awwwwww

> youre just as much of a gossip as me and kurt

> I love to see that <3

Finn: i can b nosy if i want to

> im even more infested now that i know he didnt text me anything

Mercedes: invested*

> autocorrect saves lives, finn

Finn: we dont all get to be geniuses

> i think kurt just pulled up

> finally

Mercedes: weird

> he didnt text me anything about how it went?

Finn: maybe blaine is still with him lol

> .

> somthings wrong

Mercedes: ?

> what do you mean?

> finn?

> what happened?

> hello???????

Finn: sorry

> he slammed the door

> went to his room

> i only got a quick look

> he was crying

> tried knocking on his door

> he told me to go

Mercedes: oh no.

Finn: you shuld come over

> he defintely doesnt want to talk to me about it

> maybe he'll talk to you?

Mercedes: I cant…

> Im babysitting right now

> but I'll call him

Finn: pls let me know if he picks up

Mercedes: I will

Read at 8:23 p.m.

***

Kurt Hummel

Recent Calls:

Missed Call - Mercy J 8:31 p.m.

Missed Call - Mercy J 8:28 p.m.

Missed Call - Mercy J 8:25 p.m.

Missed Call - Mercy J 8:24 p.m.

***

Direct Messages: Mercedes Jones to Kurt Hummel

Friday, 8:25 p.m.

Mercy J: kurt

> how did it go?

> please answer me

> hello?

> I would really like it if you answered your phone

> finn told me what he saw

> kurt, please talk to me

> Im your best friend

> it hurts me to know youre hurting and I cant help

> I'll leave you alone for now

> call me the second youre in the mood to

> or talk to finn

> he cares more about what goes on in your life then you realize

> goodnight kurt

> I love you

> Im sorry.

Read at 9:46 p.m.

***

Direct Messages: Finn Hudson to Mercedes Jones

Friday, 8:47 p.m.

Finn: still nothing?

Mercedes: I think he just needs personal time right now

> something obviously hurt him on the date

Finn: i guess

> it just sucks

> seeing him like this

> or not seeing him

> he hasnt left his room

> burt tried talking to him but kurt locked the door

> i didnt even know his door could lock

Mercedes: youve done all you can, finn

> thank you, for trying

> it means a lot to me

Finn: no

> thank YOU

> i wouldnt have even known he was on that stupid date if it wasnt for you being such a good friend to kurt

Mercedes: I really appreciate that

> Im going to step away from the phone for a bit

> I need to put the kids to bed

Finn: you have kids?????

Mercedes: what

> no

> Im babysitting

> I literally told you that earlier

Finn: oh yeah

> srry

> i say stupid shit like that a lot

Mercedes: well

> thanks for making me laugh at least

> I needed it

Finn: of course

> i love your laugh

> its

> how do you spell it

> cuntayjus

Mercedes: contagious?

Finn: yeah

> contagious

Mercedes: no one's ever told me that before

> thank you, finn <3

> good night. dont be afraid to call me if you get word from kurt, please

Finn: no problem

> goodnight mercedes

Read at 9:19 p.m.

***

Direct Messages: Sam Evans to Kurt Hummel

Friday, 9:17 p.m.

Sam: hi again

> sorry if im bothering you

> just wanted to let u know im still here to talk

> i noticed u havent said anything in the gc since this morning

> are u ok?

> u dont have to tell me if u dont wanna

Read at 9:28 p.m.

Friday, 9:52 p.m.

Sam: sorry

> goodnight

> hope ur ok

Kurt: Can I call you?

Sam: yes

Read at 9:55 p.m.

Chapter Text

Phone Call - Kurt Hummel and Sam Evans

Friday, 9:55 p.m.

Transcript:

Sam: Hey, what’s up?

Kurt: I…

Sam: You good, man?

Kurt: [Shuddered breathing]

Sam: What’s going on?

Kurt: Blaine doesn’t like me.

Sam: Oh. [Awkwardly long pause] I’m so sorry. Did you ask him out?

Kurt: Yes. [Pause, then speaking quickly] Well… No. Not really? He asked me out. Or so I thought. It was all going so good. He asked me to dinner and—

Sam: Wait, he took you on a date just to reject you?

Kurt: It wasn’t a date. I thought it was. [Heavy sigh] Sorry, I’m a mess right now. I can’t put my words together right.

Sam: Take your time, Kurt. I’ve got plenty of it. Just start from the beginning.

Kurt: Ok. [Long pause] Blaine texted me asking if I was doing something after Warblers practice, and when I said nothing, he went on about how he wanted to go get something to eat with me, and ask me about something. I, well, I thought that meant I was in the green. I texted Mercedes about it all. [Short pause, deep sigh] That’s why I’m calling you, and not her. I’m embarrassed. I feel terrible, but I just can’t bring myself to text her right now.

Sam: Dude, I doubt she’d judge you.

Kurt: I know she wouldn’t. But I just can’t right now. I know it doesn’t make any sense, but it’s just what I’m doing, Sam.

Sam: Oh no, I’m not fighting that. It’s messy, I get it. [Pause] Anyways, that sounds just like a date? You sure he doesn’t like you?

Kurt: Sorry, we got off track. Yes I’m sure, because he told me to my face. [Quiet inhale] We were talking and laughing and generally having a good time. So I asked him, you know, what did he want to ask me about? That’s where he dropped the bomb on me. Turns out he likes a boy who, he says, reminds him of me. He wanted to ask me for advice on how to ask him out. It wasn't me. [Shakily] Surprise!

Sam: [Muffled] Shit.

Kurt: Yeah.

Sam: What’d you say?

Kurt: Well, I tried to brush off the hurt. Make it through the night. I told him what I’d like done to me if I was in the boy’s shoes. [Pause] Turns out, as much of the theatre kid I am, I’m not very good at acting not-heartbroken when it’s real life. He noticed. And of course, being the great friend he is, he kept asking me what was wrong.

Sam: And you spilled it all?

Kurt: And I spilled it all. [Long pause] I showed him our text conversation, said how much it looked like he was asking me on a date, which he felt really bad about once he realized. [Sigh] A part of me was expecting this movie-esque reveal to happen, where he was just psyching me out to get me. Or, would at least start swooning once the guilt surfaced.

Sam: Did he?

Kurt: [Annoyed] What has this whole conversation been about, Sam? Obviously not.

Sam: Sorry. Got caught up in the theatrics of it all.

Kurt: No, I’m sorry. Didn’t mean to sound so mean. Anyways… I don’t know why, but I asked him. I asked him if I’d ever have a chance.

Sam: [Silence]

Kurt: I could tell he wanted to say no. I could just tell, Sam. He didn’t though. He just stared at me. Nothing. He said absolutely nothing. There was just this sad look on his face. If I kept looking I would have cried right there. I had to go. So I left.

Sam: Damn. [Long pause] I am so sorry, Kurt. That fucking sucks. It really seemed like you two had a chance.

Kurt: I think I just made it all up, and let you guys play into my delusions. It’s really on me.

Sam: Don’t just blame it all on yourself, dude. From what I'm pickin’ up, it sounds like Blaine’s just as guilty. Could you read me exactly what he said? If you’re chill with that, of course.

Kurt: [Inhale] Yeah. I can. One sec. [Fumbling]

Sam: [Silence, waiting]

Kurt: [Muffled] Here it is. [Clear, in a chipper voice] What are you doing after Warblers practice? [Normal voice] That was him.

Sam: Uh huh.

Kurt: [Reading tone] Well, I WAS going to see if Mercedes wanted to watch… [Normal voice] Blah blah blah. You get the jist. [Back to reading tone] Why?

Sam: And that was your reply.

Kurt: Mhm. [Chipper voice] Well, if you wanted to at all, do you wanna get something to eat? I need to ask you about something. [Normal voice] To which I then left him on read to panic text Mercedes about it. I came back about four minutes later to tell him I’d love to. He said that meeting there would be a hassle, and we should just ride together after practice. When I said, [Chipper voice] “sounds perfect!” [Normal voice] He sent a blushing-smiley emoji. That was the conversation.

Sam: Oh. Got it.

Kurt: Am I just being crazy?

Sam: Honestly?

Kurt: Honestly.

Sam: You’re not. You kept telling us about how you guys would sing duets, and were always hanging out even outside of school… and that conversation literally sounds like a “let me ask this boy out” talk. To a T

Kurt: Really?

Sam: Yes. Maybe I’m just a cheesy romantic kinda guy, but I see exactly what you saw. I get why it hurt. You wanna go get some coffee in the morning and talk more about it?

Kurt: That would actually be really nice. [Sad sigh]

Sam: Anything else bothering you? You can tell me, man.

Kurt: I just… I feel so hopeless. At first, I was lonely cause I was the only gay kid. But now, where do I go from here? I actually had a fighting chance this time, and it still wasn’t enough.

Sam: Hey. Don't beat yourself up for this. You're not a lost cause. You just focused on the wrong person. You're a nice-looking guy, I can't believe Blaine fumbled someone as cool as you, bro. You're too hard on yourself.

Kurt: [Silence]

Sam: You there?

Kurt: Yeah, sorry. Thank you. That means more than you know.

Sam: No problem!

Kurt: Look, Sam, I gotta go to bed. Thank you for listening to me bitch and moan about this.

Sam: Hey, what are friends for. Goodnight, Kurt. I'll see you tomorrow.

Kurt: Yeah. See you. Sleep well.

[Click]

Call Ended - Duration: 10:32

***

Direct Messages: Mercedes Jones to Finn Hudson

Saturday, 6:15 a.m.

Mercedes: any news?

> this is so early Im sorry

> I just cant sleep anymore without knowing

> Ill wait til youre on

Saturday, 8:07 a.m.

Finn: mercedes

> im srry i left u hanging

> hes a lil better

> said he talked to sam???????

Mercedes: ..

> he did?

Finn: thas what he told me

Mercedes: oh

> ok

Finn: did he not txt u back?

Mercedes: ATTACHMENT: [screenshot.jpg]

> he did not.

Finn: huh

> he prbly didnt want to upset you

Mercedes: its fine, finn

> you dont have to come up with anything

> Im fine

Finn: u sure?

Mercedes: yes

> did he tell you what happened?

Finn: no

> idk why he isnt saying

> must of been bad

Mercedes: I didnt know him and sam were so close

Finn: i didnt either

> i mean, he was gnna duet w kurt when he was new to glee

> but i may or may not have told him not to do it..

Mercedes: oh brother

Finn: yeah

> i feel so shitty about it

Mercedes: theres no point dwelling on it

> what’s done is done

> I wish he would just tell one of us, yk?

Finn: what if u come over

Mercedes: ?

Finn: to see kurt

Mercedes: oh yeah

> no, I’d better not

> let him come to me ig

Finn: im sorry about all of this

Mercedes: what are you sorry for?

Finn: idk

> the mess

> me not responding

> kurt hurting your feelings

Mercedes: my feelings arent hurt

Finn: oh

> well mine are

> just a bit

> so i thought you too

> nvm

> you shouldnt be ignored like that by your best friend mercedes

Mercedes: let’s give him some slack

> I gtg

> thank you for updating me

> youre actually such a good friend, finn

Finn: oh, cya

> i like talking to you

Read at 8:21 a.m.

***

Direct Messages: Kurt Hummel to Mercedes Jones

Saturday, 8:54 a.m.

Hummel boy <3: I’m sorry

Mercy J: oh my god

> finally!

> what happened?

Hummel boy <3: Why was Finn texting you?

Mercy J: bc he was worried about you?

> you didnt tell any of them you were going to be with blaine

> and speaking of blaine, you deflected

Hummel boy <3: I just didn’t know you and Finn were friends like that

Mercy J: and what if we are?

> we cant communicate if youre just gonna talk about finn, kurt

Hummel boy <3: Sorry

> I don’t really want to talk about it

Mercy J: I already have a good idea what happened

> but its fine, I respect that

> wish you would actually talk to me like we’re best friends, though

Hummel boy <3: ?

> We are

Mercy J: then why can’t you tell me?

> but can tell sam?

Hummel boy <3: .

> Finn told you that, too?

Mercy J: can you stop acting like a jealous boyfriend for two seconds and answer any of my questions?

> I was concerned for you!

Hummel boy <3: I’m sorry

Mercy J: you keep saying that

Hummel boy <3: I know

> Come over sometime later today and we’ll talk about it

> I promise

Mercy J: ok

> can I come right now?

> Im not doin anything

Hummel boy <3: Not right now

Mercy J: why not?

Hummel boy <3: I’m getting coffee with Sam

Read at 9:19 a.m.

***

New Directions 2: Here We Go Again

Saturday, 9:37 a.m.

Tina: @everyone

> help me settle a debate

Rhythmike: omg

> you’re going to the gc about it???

Tina: i am bc ur WRONG babe

Rhythmike:🤦

artieabruhms: what up

QFabray: Do tell

ZizedUp: chances are tina’s most likely right

> but what

Tina: thank u, lauren :3

> anyways

Tina changed the chat name to “applesauce: liquid or solid?”

QFabray: Nvm

> Bye

Tina: W E M L

QFabray: ???

Tina: what ever major LOSER

QFabray: Wtf

brittbrittluvsu: omg camp rock

> luvvvv that movie :P

Tina: BRITTANY GOT THE REFERENCE

> id give u a hug rn if i wasnt stuck w my stinky boyfriend

> go to hell - mike

artieabruhms: liquid

> it takes the form of the container

Tina: BUT YOU EAT IT!

Rhythmike: thank you artie!!!!

> nobody is CHEWING apple sauce

ZizedUp: hm

> solid

> I like my applesauce chunky

RealRachelBerry: I think that’s just a you thing.

ZizedUp: I like what I like

Tina: lauren you are so real

> plzz were still at 50/50 anybody else??????

RealRachelBerry: It’s a dumb debate.

> But I would have to go with liquid, if I were to choose.

Rhythmike: YESSSSS

> thank you rachel youre so smart

RealRachelBerry: Why, thank you! :)

Tina: omfgggggggg

> hes only saying that cuz ur playing into his delusion that its a liquid

> and ur falling for it

RealRachelBerry: A compliment’s a compliment.

> Applesauce is too runny to ever be considered a solid!

Santana: you’re too runny to be considered a solid

RealRachelBerry: ..

> What the hell does that even mean?

Santana: ;)

QFabray: Just don’t entertain it, Rachel

Santana: huh

> you’re smooching up to Berry now????

> just cause you guys lezzed out last night doesnt mean you can betray me like this omg

RealRachelBerry: ?!?!

> SANTANA

Santana: you rang?

QFabray: I’m gonna go

RealRachelBerry: I’m straight, Santana.

> Please never say something like that again.

Santana: jfchrist

> my bad

Tina: stop getting off track

> @samiamevans i see you reading my message

> answer me coward

Chappy Gilmore: woah

> hold on lemme go bck

> artie’s a smart guy

> so ill go w liquid

Tina: god damnit sam

> go away again

Chappy Gilmore: kurt says solid tho

> says its mushed up apples and not just the juice

Rhythmike: you’re with kurt???

> and you didn’t tell us?????

Chappy Gilmore: oop

> yeah

Santana: @hudson05 permission to use the word now

Hudsinner: oh my god

artieabruhms: where you guys at?

Kurtstylin: The Lima Bean

artieabruhms: 10 is a bit later for coffee

> don’tya think

Kurtstylin: we got coffee just around 9

artieabruhms: uh huh

Tina: HE HAS RETURNED

> whyd you die??

Kurtstylin: I didn’t

MissJones: he had something with the warblers

artieabruhms: with blaine? raises eyebrows

Kurtstylin: Not just Blaine

> .

> Thank you, Cedes

MissJones: no problem

artieabruhms: hm

> mercedes what do you say

> about the applesauce

MissJones: tina, Im sorry girl

> but its a liquid

> you put it in a bowl

> you cant eat it with a fork

Tina: yes you can

> if you have enough willpower

Rhythmike: lord

> she’s going to the fridge with a fork

> of course this is the one time my mom bought applesauce since I was like 7

> LMAO IT WAS EXPIRED

Tina: im not done with this yet mike chang

QFabray: It’s a non-Newtonian fluid

Santana: it’s a non newtonian fluid 🤓☝️

Tina: a what

QFabray: ATTACHMENT: [screenshot.jpg]

> That’s what Quora tells me, at least

Santana: I thought you didn’t care about the debate, fabray

QFabray: I got curious

artieabruhms: ohh shit

> lemme check reddit for answers to this debate too

Rhythmike: bro uses reddit

artieabruhms: you literally follow me on there

brittbrittluvsu: u guys should follow lord tubbington’s reddit acct

> wait no he got banned for hate speech

> NVM!!

ZizedUp: good for him

artieabruhms: [LINK: Reddit - Is applesauce a liquid or a solid?]

> pretty much the same thing quinn said

> good job homegirl

QFabray: Lol

Hudsinner: but what tf is that

Santana: its obviously

> a fluid that does not follow Newton's law of viscosity, that is, it has variable viscosity dependent on stress. In particular, the viscosity of non-Newtonian fluids can change when subjected to force.

> dumbass

brittbrittluvsu: ur so smart tana <3

QFabray: You literally copy and pasted that word for word from wikipedia

Santana: hey Quinn

> remember that time I bitch slapped you

QFabray: ..

RealRachelBerry: Don’t talk to her like that.

QFabray: She’s just tryna be funny, Rachel, it’s fine

Santana: I’m being tag teamed by Mr. and Mrs. Fabray

QFabray: Dms

Santana: damn ok

***

Direct Messages: Quinn Fabray to Santana Lopez

Saturday, 9:52 a.m.

Quinnie: I know this is like your whole thing

> But can you knock it off with the Rachel jokes

Tana: ???

> didn’t know you cared so much about her

Quinnie: Look

> I’m trying my best hiding you and Brittany’s

> Whatever it is

> And then you say stuff like this about me and Rachel in the chat?

> Publicly?

Tana: wtf do you mean

> what does me and britt have to do with this

> Rachel’s straight

> you’re straight

> unless

> wait

Quinnie: Rachel’s straight

> Just please, don’t.

Tana: WAIT

Read at 9:58 a.m.

Tana: QUINN FABRAY YOU MOTHERFUCKING GAY ASS BITCH GET BACK HERE.

***

applesauce: liquid or solid?

Saturday, 9:53 a.m.

Tina: wonder what theyre talking bout

RealRachelBerry: Me too…

Tina: lit rally everyone here hides shit

> when is it my turn to be in on something

artieabruhms: you hid that you were faking your stutter for like

> 13 years

> I think you lost your secret privileges

Tina: whateverrrr

Rhythmike: I still can’t believe you did that

Tina: im dedicated to the arts what can i say

Santana: Rachel, I am sorry that I keep making jokes about you and Quinn lezzing out

> I will stop

Tina: what?????

RealRachelBerry: Are you trying to be funny, again?

Santana: no

> now accept my apology please

> so we can move on and act like this never happened

ZizedUp: literally what is happening anymore

MissJones: man idk

RealRachelBerry: Well.

> Thank you, Santana.

Santana: that was so gross of me

> can I be a bitch again

QFabray: Sure

Santana: girl stfu I know I can be, I don’t need your approval

> that’s much better

Tina: old tana’s back!!!!!!!

Santana: btw ik I’m late to the convo

> but even after we got the answer, I still say Tina’s right

> NEVER let a man be right

> got that?

Tina: of course <3

Rhythmike: I accidentally rolled my eyes and tina called me misogynistic

Santana: cuz you are

QFabray: Well, technically you both are right

Tina: compromise is so boring

artieabruhms: -Germany

Tina: BRUH

artieabruhms: tehe

Santana: grown ass man saying tehe

> @Kurtstylin are you and gills still at Lima Bean

> me and Britt are gonna go get redbull drinks from there

Kurtstylin: Sorry, Tana, I just left

Chappy Gilmore: im still here

Santana: if I was asking for you specifically I would have tagged you

> bitch

Chappy Gilmore: ow

Santana: sorry that was mean of me

> oh my god what is happening to me

artieabruhms: santana’s heart is growing three sizes bigger today

> fah who forazeeeee

Tina: dah who dorazeeee

Santana: SHUT THE FUCK UP

brittbrittluvsu: WELCOME XMAS COME THIS WAY!!!!!!

Santana: britt I am right next to you

> choose your next words carefully

brittbrittluvsu: :3

Santana: anyways.

> we’re walking in now trouty

> don’t cream from excitement

Chappy Gilmore: friends!

Santana: gay

***

Direct Messages: Kurt Hummel to Sam Evans

Saturday, 10:24 a.m.

Kurt: I can't thank you enough, Sam

> I feel a little better about it all

Sam: imglad :)

> that was fun

> we should do that more often

Kurt: Yeah

> It's nice having a good straight guy friend that I don't feel so awkward around.

> Don’t get me wrong, Artie’s my friend, but we kinda drifted after last year

> And Mike is so busy with Tina

> And Finn is. My brother. But also Finn.

> And we don’t talk about Puck.

> Sorry, that was a lot

> Thanks for being good company

Sam: anytime

> lmk next time you wnna hang out

Kurt: I will!

> And you as well

Sam: will do

> cya some other time, Kurt

Kurt: See ya

> :)

Sam: :)

Read at 10:31 a.m.

***

Direct Messages: Kurt Hummel to Mercedes Jones

Saturday, 1:36 p.m.

Hummel boy <3: Can you come over?

> Everything’s shitty, I get if you don’t want to

> But I swear I will explain everything

Mercy J: yes, I can

> just

> please don’t blow me off again

> it stung

Hummel boy <3: I know

> I won’t

> Thank you

> Text me when you’re on your way

Mercy J: mhm

> will head out shortly

Hummel boy <3: Alright

> See you soon

> <3

Mercy J: <3

Read at 1:42 p.m.

Chapter Text

Mercedes crinkled her brows as she spent the car ride staring at her text messages with Kurt, then Finn’s, then back to Kurt’s. It was a steady cycle.

“If you keep frowning like that, baby, it’s gonna get stuck like that.”

“Hm?” She finally pulled away from her phone to look over at her mom, who was side-eyeing her from the driver’s seat. Glancing back down at the screen one last time, Mercedes pocketed it and shifted in her own seat. “Sorry I… Just got a lot on my mind,” she replied with a gentle sigh.

“Anything you can talk to me about?” Her mom hummed, and Mercedes bit her lip anxiously. “Well…” She faltered as she noticed that the car was already pulling up to Kurt’s house, and a wave of relief hit her. “I’ll tell you ‘bout it later, mom. Love you, thanks for the ride!” An overly cheery tone forced its way into her voice while she planted a kiss onto her mother’s cheek and opened the passenger door in a flash.

She approached the home of her best friend, staring at the oak door in front of her. A twisting sensation made its way into her stomach.

It took a beat for Mercedes to reach up her fist and knock on the door, which felt strange to her. She had always been so comfortable at the Hummels’, what was so different about it now?

Don’t kid yourself, Mercedes.

You know why.

The tense feeling of frustration still lingered within her as she reminded herself again of Kurt calling Sam for support instead of her. She would need to get one hell of an explanation from him.

Oddly, nobody answered her first knock. Considering the idea that the sound got muffled by a noise in the house, she elevated her arm again for a second round of knocking. Once she pounded on the door with more volume, it finally swung open as she was mid-knock. Finn greeted her, and she jumped.

“Oh God, Mercedes! I’m so sorry. It’s chaotic in here,” he stammered, widening the door to let her in. “Should I… come back?” She angled her head up towards Finn, a concerned look crossing her face. “No, well, I don’t know. Maybe? Kurt’s got into an argument with his dad. It may be a while,” he laughed uncomfortably. “What?” Mercedes’s eyes shot up just in time to catch the muffled shouting towards the end of the hall.

“How about you just sit on the, uh, the couch… while Kurt sorts this out.” She could tell Finn was scrambling to make the environment any less uncomfortable than it already was, which was sweet, but didn’t work too well. Still, Mercedes gave him a courteous smile and snaked around the couch to find seating just on the edge.

“So… What’s it about?” She drummed her hands on her lap, staring ahead. “The fight?” Finn asked, to which she nodded. “Oh, uh… It’s actually about the Blaine thing.”

Mercedes perked up at the information, and raised an eyebrow. “The Blaine thing? What's there to get mad about that, for?” She eyed Finn uneasily as his own darted back and forth between the argument and the girl in front of him.

Rubbing his hand on the back of his neck, Finn swayed awkwardly. “I… Well, I accidentally let it slip that Kurt disappeared last night to be with Blaine. I didn’t think it would be such a big deal.”

“You never understand!” A shrill voice snapped in the distance.

“How would you know? You never give me the chance to, Kurt!” A quieter, but deeper, shout countered Kurt’s.

Finn swiveled his head around to sneak a look towards the source of the argument, then turned back to face Mercedes before joining her on the couch. “Yeah.” He fidgeted with the fray of a blanket which rested on the arm beside him; he was clearly not in a place of comfort at the moment. Who would be? She pursed her lips and frowned deeply. “Why is it such a big deal?”

Pausing, Finn took a moment to remember the origin of the angry conversation currently happening. “It wasn’t, at first. Burt was just kinda offended that Kurt didn’t want to tell him. Then when he tried to talk to Kurt about it, y’know, just wanting to offer support, Kurt snapped at him a little bit. I think he was just tired and upset about it all, but one thing led to another and now they’re… this,” he huffed.

Mercedes nodded slowly, her mouth still downturned. How was she supposed to talk to Kurt about any of yesterday when he was too busy brawling with his father? As if she had asked the question out loud, Kurt suddenly made his first appearance stomping down the hallway. He stopped short a couple feet behind the couch, catching sight of the girl sitting there.

“Mercedes! Oh my God. I am so sorry… Did you hear any of that?” When Mercedes nodded lightly, paired with an apologetic smile, Kurt buried his face into his palm with a groan. “Look, I’m… I’m sorry. I didn’t plan for this,” he narrowed his eyes toward Finn with the slightest amount of passive-aggressiveness in his vision, to which Finn sank deeper into the couch next to Mercedes with a look of guilt, “I think you should come back later. Now… Now isn’t a good time.”

She would have been offended, and maybe would have even stormed out with a dramatic flair; however, the sight of his ever-so-slightly shaking hands and heaving shoulders communicated to her that he wasn’t trying to hurt her, he was simply overwhelmed with a flurry of emotions.

Mercedes gave him a sad look and stood up, instead. “Mercedes, I’m sorry. This is shitty. I’m shitty,” he crossed his arms and clutched his elbows as if he would fly away if he let go. Raising her right hand dismissively, she shook her head.

“No, Kurt, it’s fine. I get it. I can call my mom. It just might take a bit,” she paused, “are you okay…?” Kurt clenched his jaw and glanced away from his friend. “I’m going to be. I just… I need some time. To sort out my thoughts,” he finished, his voice wobbling a little bit. Mercedes clicked her tongue sympathetically as she reached for her phone, but was stopped by a hand resting on her arm.

“I can take you home, if you want.”

Finn offered a consoling smile to Mercedes, and she shook her head quickly. “No, Finn. I can’t make you do that. I’ll just have my mom get me, it’s no big deal!” Kurt stepped towards her. “Actually… Maybe Finn taking you is a good idea. You just got here, didn’t you? I wouldn’t want you calling up your mom right as she left just because of my baggage,” he sighed.

She opened her mouth to protest, but nothing came out. She felt defeated. “Okay,” she breathed out, and Finn was walking her right back to the door. Nothing seemed to work out anymore.

The ride back with Finn was silent. There was a faint song playing on the radio, but neither of them felt right enough to turn the dial up. Finn made a quiet popping sound with his lips, and Mercedes leaned toward the window. Nothing was spoken between the two.

There was nothing to be said, honestly. Their only conversations the past two days were solely about Kurt. Maybe that was all they would ever have in common.

“What’re you doing for Christmas?”

Mercedes was caught off-guard by the random question and had to adjust her position to acknowledge Finn better. “Oh, um… me? For Christmas? Why?” She asked, skeptically. Finn brushed off her skepticism, as he always did, and shrugged slightly. “I don't know… I just wanted to know, I guess? Learn more about you? Isn't that what friends do?” Right, they're like, good friends now. That still felt strange to Mercedes. “Well, I… I usually go to my grandparents’ on Christmas Eve, and then go to a church service on Christmas morning,” she glanced away and continued shyly, “and I sing for them.” The first smile shared between Finn and Mercedes since she showed up to Kurt’s place phased onto Finn’s face.

“For real? That’s sick! Do you do, like, that fancy church stuff, or the Christmas classics?”

“Fancy church stuff? You mean hymns?”

“Who’s him? God?”

“No, hym-ns with an n.”

“Hins?”

“H-Y-M-N-S.”

“Hym… Uns?”

“Remind me what level of English you’re in?”

“The one Puck’s in.”

“Oh, honey.”

Mercedes was laughing, and Finn was laughing. There was a slight redness tinging his ears, but she figured it was because he was a little embarrassed at his struggle. “Anyways, I do both. I start with the hymns to get the old people on board. Then I hit ‘em with the Rockin’ Around the Christmas Tree to keep the kids awake. It’s all in a day’s work,” she chuckled.

“Well, I love your work. You’re like, insanely good. It scares me a little,” Finn admitted sheepishly. Mercedes fought back a cheesy grin. “Thanks, Finn. You really know how to make a girl smile,” she prodded his shoulder sweetly, and he ducked his head with his own smile.

She didn't realize how much she was itching to talk more with him until the familiar view of her house rolled into eye-sight and a yearning to just drive past it and continue crept in. Opening her mouth to vocalize this want, a ding from her phone quickly quieted her.

***

Direct Messages: Kurt Hummel to Mercedes Jones

Saturday, 2:20 p.m.

Hummel boy <3: Mercedes

> I'm so sorry

> I know you told me not to blow you off again

> I don’t know why I’m acting like this

Mercy J: it hurts but

> I understand, kurt

> one of these days youll talk to me

> guess today just isnt one of those

Hummel boy <3: Call me tonight, please

> I promise nothing will get in the way

Mercy J: not even sam?

Hummel boy <3: .

> Yeah

Mercy J: I'll hold you to that, hummel

Hummel boy <3: I know

> Has Finn dropped you off?

Mercy J: almost

> were parked in my driveway

> hes actually looking over my shoulder reading this

> yeah youre not being slick, hudsinner

Hummel boy <3: Hi, Finn

Mercy J <3: hi

> stop blowing of mercedes

Hummel boy <3: I will, damn

> Give the phone back to her

Mercy J: no

> I did not tell him to say that

> but facts

> alright, talk to you later

> I hope.

Hummel boy <3: You will

> Bye, Mercedes, love you <3

Mercy J: bye

Read at 2:27 p.m.

***

applesauce: liquid or solid?

Saturday, 4:56 p.m.

RealRachelBerry: Hey, everyone!

Santana: before you ask

> no, we haven't practiced in the slightest

> yes, we're aware that regionals is in less than 2 months

> no, we're not having a rehearsal slumber party

> let us have winter break in peace you witch

artieabruhms: damb

RealRachelBerry: I wasn't going to ask about that!

QFabray: Yes, you were

RealRachelBerry: Okay, and what if I was? It wouldn't hurt! >:(

Santana: actually it hurts me

> owwwwowwwowwwwwewowwwwww

> will you stop now

RealRachelBerry: Okay. Fine.

> Quinn, I'm going to be swinging by the record shop to get some inspiration. You live close by there, don't you?

> Do you want to come with me?

QFabray: Yeah, I do! Sure :)

RealRachelBerry: Mk! I'll head off now! Goodbye, everyone!

> I hope you take my weariness seriously while I am gone.

Santana: tf quinn lives nowhere near that place ??????

> wanky

[wanky] - Santana unsent a message.

> weird

Chappy Gilmore: wait whatd you unsend

Santana: just big and nosy

Chappy Gilmore: :(

Tina: what do u guys have planned for winter break

puckmeister: lauren wyd for winter brake

ZizedUp: anything expensive that you’ll pay for me

puckmeister: bet

> theirs ur anser tina

Tina: ok idgaf

> anyone else

Hudsinner: I FINALY FOUND OUT HOW TO CHANGE MY NAME

Kurtstylin: Oh do tell

> After you change I’m revoking your admin

> So make it good

Hudsinner changed his name to Fimn.

Fimn: wait i pressed the wrong button

> kurt let me change it again

> KURT

Kurtstylin: Do you guys hear something?

Rhythmike: no don’t think so

Fimn: KURT

Kurtstylin: I don’t have any winter break plans, Tina!

Tina: sick, we should do something

Fimn: DOBT IGNORE MME

Kurtstylin: OOOH

> What if we go ice skating?

> What do you think, Fimn?

Fimn: goodbye

MissJones: wait but ice skating kinda a good idea

Santana: if I get to watch any of you eat shit that would be a hangout worth doing any day

brittbrittluvsu: i luvluvluv ice skating :3 im so much better then every1 else on the rink

Santana: we know, britt <3

artieabruhms: I will have to opt out of this one

Chappy Gilmore: wait artie what if we put blades on your wheels………

Rhythmike: we already tried that last year

Tina: we told yall he wouldnt move

> but did u guys listen

> nooo

artieabruhms: It was kind of funny how they had to close down the ice rink just to dig my wheels out of the ice

Tina: NO IT WASNT

> I WAS SO EMBARRASSED

> CHILDREN WERE CRYING ARTIE

Santana: that was the funny part!

artieabruhms: tana gets me

Kurtstylin: When would you all like to go?

Tina: how does monday sound

Chappy Gilmore: I'm so down

Fimn: i cant ice skate

Santana: we know, Finn

Rhythmike: Fimn*

Fimn: fuck you

MissJones: dont worry, Finn, I gotchu

> its fun once you get the reins on it

Fimn: every1 always says that

> didnt stop my bones from breaking last time

Chappy Gilmore: wait u broke ur bones????????

artieabruhms: no he didn't

> you sprained ur ankle

Santana: and cried

MissJones: omg I forgot about that

Fimn: thank u for remiding everyone, santnana.

Santana: you’re welcome!!

Kurtstylin: I’m actually so excited

Chappy Gilmore: so am I !!!!

> does anyone have any spare ice skates

Santana: literally nobody does

> rent some like the rest of us

Chappy Gilmore: its so expensive to rent thoughhhh

Rhythmike: I can cover u, Sam!

Kurtstylin: I have an extra pair of skates

ZizedUp: why do you have an extra pair of ice skates in bumfuck ohio

Kurtstylin: I actually have 4

> A different color to match each of my figure skating fits from when I used to do little league figure-skating

Tina: that’s a thing?????

Santana: how do you get gayer each fucking time kurt

Kurtstylin: I try <3

MissJones: ok, its settled

Chappy Gilmore: thx, kurt :D

> how r u so cool all the time

Santana: kurt and cool cannot be uttered together

Kurtstylin: Stop being a hater!!!!

artieabruhms: telling Santana to stop being a hater is like

> telling me to stand up and moonwalk

Tina: bro

artieabruhms: am I wrong???

Santana: so true WheeLo Green

MissJones: LMAO

brittbrittluvsu: can we maek bets on who will land on there face 1st

> cuz my moneys on finn

Fimn: not fair you guys will all bet on me

Kurtstylin: How about… If Finn falls first we all get $10 each from him

Fimn: im not doing that

Tina: way to ruin ice skating, finn

Rhythmike: BOOOOOOOOO

Fimn: do you guys even want me to go….?

MissJones: I do!

> I promise I wont bet on you..

Fimn: im only going cus mercedes is being nice

Santana changed the chat name to “finn hudson epic fail comp.”

Fimn: ???

Santana: just preparing for the influx of shit-eating videos of you on monday

Fimn: ok.

Rhythmike: I for one am looking so forward to this :D

Tina: alright, talk to u all laterrrrr

Kurtstylin: Bye!

MissJones: bye, tina <3

Tina: bye bae <333

***

Mercedes Jones:

Incoming Call - Hummel boy <3

Accept Decline

—
Accept Decline

***

Phone Call - Mercedes Jones and Kurt Hummel

Saturday, 8:22 p.m.

Transcript:

Mercedes: [Silence]

Kurt: Hi, Cedes.

Mercedes: Hi…

Kurt: So… [Awkwardly long pause] How are you?

Mercedes: Fine… I guess…?

Kurt: Sorry. I… [Drifting off]

Mercedes: What happened? Start with that.

Kurt: [Long sigh, shifting noises] Alright. [Short pause] He rejected me.

Mercedes: I figured… But why was it so hard for you to tell me? [Long pause] Did you think I was gonna make fun of you? What was the reason?

Kurt: No, I… [Heavy sigh] I was embarrassed, and annoyed… Mostly with myself. I guess… I guess I took it out on you cause you were my biggest supporter of us.

Mercedes: I’m really sorry, Kurt. But you need to trust that I’m here for you. It’s one thing to go ghost on everyone… But specifically towards me? For someone else? That really hurt.

Kurt: I know, I—

Mercedes: Why Sam? Do you like him?

Kurt: No! [Exasperated] Can’t I be friends with a guy without being accused of preying on him?

Mercedes: That’s not what I said.

Kurt: Then why’d you ask?

Mercedes: Maybe ‘cause I want to find out why he’s so much more important to you than me?

Kurt: [Long beat]

Mercedes: Well?

Kurt: [Lengthy pause] …He wasn’t. That’s why. It would’ve made it so much more real to face if I opened up to you. Sam was already checking up on me since my disappearance and I just… Impulsively called him. [Gentle sigh] You’re my best friend, Mercedes. Your judgment holds so much more weight than all these other guys’. You should know that by now.

Mercedes: [Pause] See. It was that simple. You didn’t need to dance around me. I shouldn’t have relied on Finn just to see if you were okay.

Kurt: I know… [Drift off, long pause] Speaking of Finn…

Mercedes: Hm?

Kurt: Do you two, like, like each other now…?

Mercedes: Kurt, what did you just get mad at me for.

Kurt: Ugh, fine. You guys are no fun, where’d all the pre-groupchat drama go?

Mercedes: I dunno. Guess we’re on our best behavior for regionals.

Kurt: Oh! Now that you remind me… How’s regionals prep going?

Mercedes: We have no choice but to have it be going good, we’re under Rachel’s ironclad fist every second of the day. You?

Kurt: Haha. Fine. But I don’t know if I can go back to the Warblers and face Blaine again after everything.

Mercedes: What exactly happened…?

Kurt: Uh… [Long pause, deep in thought] Long story short, he asked me to dinner to get advice for another boy he liked…

Mercedes: Oh.

Kurt: And when I told him he just stared at me sadly…

Mercedes: Ouch.

Kurt: Yeah.

Mercedes: But he wasn’t mean about it?

Kurt: He apologized, and tried to be all friendly, but I stormed out. Too embarrassed.

Mercedes: I know it’s hard but… You should try still being friends. You guys were still close, and I wouldn’t want you fucking up regionals just ‘cause Blaine’s too stupid to see what a catch you are.

Kurt: Mercedes…

Mercedes: Plus, it wouldn’t be as satisfying when we beat you if you’re off your A-game.

Kurt: Damn, okay.

Mercedes: Will you try?

Kurt: [Long pause, gentle laughing] I’ll try.

Mercedes: Thank you, Kurt. I missed you.

Kurt: I missed you too.

Mercedes: I gotta go now, my mom wants to watch a movie with me. I’ll talk to you tomorrow?

Kurt: Talk to you tomorrow, love you Cedes.

Mercedes: Love you, too.

[Click]

Call Ended - Duration: 5:28

***

Direct Messages: Kurt Hummel to Blaine Anderson

Saturday, 8:41 p.m.

Kurt :): Hey, Blaine

Blaine <3: Kurt!

> How are you doing?

> I’m sorry

Kurt :): Don’t be

> I’m sorry

> I’m fine

> I just wanted to text you and ask if we can still be friends

> Sorry if this is awkward

Blaine <3: Of course we can

> It’s not awkward at all

> I was really scared I was gonna lose you as a friend

> I didn’t react the way I should have last night

Kurt :): How else were you supposed to?

> Anyways, I’m glad

> I didn’t want this to mess up anything with the Warblers

Blaine <3: Of course it wouldn’t

> You wanna get coffee tomorrow?

> As friends

Kurt :): Don’t worry, the communication isn’t going to get messed up anymore, lol

> Sure :)

Blaine <3: 👍

Read at 9:01 p.m.