Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

You walk through the Hadal Blacksite bleeding out. You have just been attacked by a squiddle while running for your life. Flashbacks of when you agreed to get to this place go through your head, why? Why did you do it? you actually thought that being dead would be much better right now.

"Why am I suffering so much, I never did anything bad... it was never my fault... why...." these words keep repeating in your head. Your past actions took you here, what you did in the past was never your fault. As you unlock another door, you hear a familiar sound in one of the vents. It was definitely him.

"Hey! Over here!" You knew it was him instantly, you had encountered him only two times before. But here you were again.

Sebastian was standing in his usual spot. "Welcome back, oh.... looks like you had a tough time" he says after realizing you had some severe wounds. He couldn't help the fact that he was worried, he had a sort of... attachment to you.

You look up at him, "ugh I guess, you have any medkits left?" You ask, your pain being clearly noticeable through your voice. "I sure do, just give me your research and grab it from my tail like always, you give him the research and borrow a medkit. You were barely able to walk but somehow you grabbed it.

"If you want to heal here just sit over there, I don't mind" he says as he points at a nearby chair. You slowly walk towards it, sounds of pain coming from you fill the awkward silence in the room. "Ow..." you say as you sit down on the chair, the pain slowly consumes you more and more, you can barely hold yourself up. Sebastian looks at you, he feels... something... a sudden sense of taking care of you and your wounds.

He stares for a bit, then he speaks. "You're a total mess, here, I will help you, if you don't mind" he says as he gets a bit closer to you. "Go ahead..." you say in a quiet tone. For some reason, you like having him close like this. He looks at the wound in your tight, a worried expression can clearly be seen on his face.

Sebastian gently holds your tight, you actually weren't expecting him to be this gentle because of the way he looks. He opens the first aid kit to get some of the stuff out and heal you. He grabs a bottle of alcohol so clean your wound. "This will burn so be ready, alright?" he says. You just nod and get ready; you feel the alcohol on your wound, making you hold Sebastian's hand out of pain.

Sebastian realized this, he didn't complain, he doesn't even like being touched so the fact that he allowed you was weird. He just let you do it. "Sebastian... you don't mind if I hold your hand, right?" you ask. "No, it's fine" he says without looking at you, he tried to cover his slightly blushed face. That's when you realized how huge his hand actually was compared to yours. You found it attractive.

He finished cleaning your wound and put some bandages on your thigh, you refused to look at it. "Ok looks like we're done with this, you do have lots of scratches on your waist though, is it okay if I check?" You nod, feeling his huge hand around your waist sure was...nice.

"Uhm...can you...lift up your shirt a little bit...? It's okay if you don't want to" he said in an awkward tone, you found it silly how he was always so rude but now he was gentle and shy. "Sure..." you were also a bit shy about this. You could feel his cold yet comforting hands taking care of your wounds, you couldn't deny that you did like the attention he was giving you.

As he gently moved his hand, you couldn't stop feeling so embarrassed yet happy about him taking care of you. You could also feel him holding your hand as you held it more tightly because of the pain.

"Ok we're done, are you alright now?" Sebastian asks as he slightly caresses your waist. For a second you remained quiet at this reaction. "Yeah, I feel better...Thank you, Sebastian" you say with an awkward tone, even after this response, he kept holding your waist and your hand. You wondered why he was still doing this; he was done after all.

You both kept an awkward silence, until Sebastian realized what was happening, he immediately pulled away from you. To not make things even more uncomfortable, you ask something. "Sebastian, why did you decide to take care of me this time?" You ask, you knew you had been hurt before, and he had seen you, but he never did anything other than giving you a medkit in exchange for some research.

He was quiet for a second, he stared at the wall in an attempt to avoid looking at you. "I just realized you were too hurt, and I didn't want you to waste the stuff I sell" You could easily tell that this could be true, but something in his tone told you that he was lying. He didn't say it in his usual sarcastic tone. this was a more awkward and shy tone.

"So... you felt kind?" You say in a teasing voice. "Now don't say it like that, but sure" he says while taking a short glance at you. You couldn't stop the thought of how cute he looked like when he was shy and flustered.

"Well, you're sweet when you do that, it's weird to find any sort of comfort in this place" you say honestly. "I bring comfort?" Sebastian asks, he was surprised you felt comforted by his care.

"Well, you do, you're just so caring when you want to..." you say while blushing, you try to hide it though.

"Oh... Thank you..." Sebastian says trying to hide his clearly happy expression. You realize that you have to get going to get the crystal you're here for. "Oh right, I have a mission, I have to leave." you say as you quickly stand up, but you feel too drained and hurt to even take a step. You end up falling back on the chair awkwardly as a whimper comes out of your mouth.

"Wow, trying to leave in that state?" Sebastian says mockingly. "Ugh, I can do it, I swear" you say with a grunt and hurt face. Sebastian couldn't help but feel worried and sorry for you, he hated seeing you in this state.

"No, you can't, sit down and rest here" he says as he gently pushes you with his tail back to where you were.

"You do realize that I will explode if I stay here, right?" you say thinking he was forgetting it. "And you do realize I can deactivate your suit, so it doesn't, right?" he says mocking the tone you spoke to him with. "Wait, you can?" you say surprised, you wanted to be with him as long as possible too, in fact, you cared more about spending time with him than treating your wounds.

"I can, now, do you want to die out there or get rest and heal?" he says. "Just do your thing..." you say as a way of giving him permission to deactivate your suit. As he gets closer to you, you realized the size of him compared to yours. He was strong, huge, you knew he was able to kill someone with his bare hands. You wondered, how can someone like him treat you so kindly, so gently, in this situation out of any other. After he was done deactivating your suit, you felt a slight relief. "Thank you" you say a bit tired, all that running, all those wounds, the stress, everything had you so exhausted.

"Looks like someone is tired" He says in a teasing manner. "I am, but it's whatever, now, when can I leave?" You ask, still focused on your mission.

"Hm, you can leave until I'm sure you're healed enough" he says while getting closer to you again. You let out an annoyed expression because of this answer. You knew you would be here a long time. But something inside you stopped you from questioning him, you liked the way he was so protective over you.

"Seriously?" You say, he just nods. "Alright..." You say while resting your body in the chair you were sitting in. Sebastian just stood there like usually. He stared at you though. A long stare, you didn't look back at him, but you felt him.

To break the awkward silence, you decide to try and start a conversation. "Sebastian, why are you here?" After this question, his face switched to a disturbed expression, as if he had remember something horrifying, and he did.

"I..." He says while taking a loud sigh. "I don't think you want to know that..." He says, trying to avoid the question. You realize the worry in his face, you felt so bad for him, what could've happened? After all the help he had offered you, the least you could do was comfort and help him out with this struggle.

"Hey, it's ok, whatever happened, you can tell me" you tried your best at not forcing him, you didn't want to hurt him. Sebastian felt like he could trust you, but he was afraid of everything you would think of him. He was afraid that you would seem him as a monster, like everyone else.

"You don't have to, alright?" You say reassuring him. "I can trust you, right?" Sebastian says, he felt a strong connection to you. You answer, "yes, you can" deeply gazing into his glowing eyes.

Sebastian then talks. "I wasn't brought here willingly, years ago, I was accused of killing 9 people, that was never true. I was meant to be executed, but Urbanshade just had to step in... They took me here..." He stops for a second, on the verge of crying, screaming, anything to show the distress he felt. But he kept those emotions in, or at least tried to.

"They mixed my DNA with many animals, the took me apart and put me back together, they tortured me for years, they never stopped..." He says in between tears. "I never did anything, but they turned me into this...monster" he says trying to hide his true feelings.

All that Sebastian wanted was some comfort, he wanted peace from his suffering, even for a second. He only wanted someone to be gentle with him. He only wanted someone to see him as a human and not a monster.

You look at him, how can someone call him a monster? In your eyes, he was beautiful, he was perfect.

"I'm so sorry...you didn't deserve that..." You say, wanting to deeply comfort and reassure him that he was still human, at least in your eyes.

You felt him almost crying, you wanted to offer any help you could to him. "Do you need...a hug?" You ask, what a stupid question. He looks at you.

"Are you... willing to give me one?" He wonders, how could you willingly want to hug him, feel him when he looked like this.

"Yes, it's the least I can do for you..." Before you realized it, you felt him wrapping his huge arms around your body. You hugged him by putting your arms over his shoulders. This was comforting for both of you. You were still sitting in that chair, but you felt him picking you up to pull you closer. You couldn't deny how much you liked this, he was so strong that he could pick you up that easily.

He rested his head in your shoulder, you gently caressed his hair. Earlier he felt cold, but now, he felt so warm. You just loved this feeling, you wanted to stay like this with him forever. This hug lasted long, until he pulled away for a bit, you immediately missed his touch. But he then holds your hands.

"Thank you so much... I hadn't received a hug in...years" he says trying to hold himself together. "It was time you felt something other than pain" you say as you move your hands around his. You both felt comforted, safe, only with each other, finally.

Chapter Text

After a long hug between you and Sebastian, you try to let go. You could tell how he did not like this though.

"Sebastian...we have been hugging for quite a long time don't you think? Are you not tired of this?" You ask, genuinely concerned if he was doing this because of you being clingy. Little do you know, it was the other way around.

"I don't... want to let you go...." Sebastian says as he snuggles his face into your neck, what did he just say?

You're surprised at this reaction. Was he really this touched starved? You couldn't judge him though, being down here for years, with no comfort from anyone, only pain, only being seen as a monster. You understood him. You also craved this comfort. "Okay...I don't hate this..." You say, trying to sound as nice as possible.

To not just have a dry hug, you start playing with his hair. You pet his head, like if he was a cat. Then you hear a small groan, but it sounded like a purr.

Was he actually purring at your touch? Him out of anyone else? You liked the sounds he was making though.

You wanted to ask if he was purring. You didn't want to make him uncomfortable though so you just stayed quiet. You loved how he was so clingy and sensitive to your touch. You can feel as he puts his long tail underneath both of you and he gently lays you down. He then lays his head on your chest, hugging you again with his huge arms.

"Seb...?" You ask with a curious tone. "You don't mind if we stay like this right? I just...want to rest..." He says, you could tell how exhausted he was from his voice.

You just let him snuggle up with you. Yet, you couldn't believe how he was a little spoon, judging by his size, it was crazy, yet adorable. In your mind, you realized there was a deep connection between you and him. There was no way he was doing just because he felt like it. You didn't want to think too much about it. Did you seriously fall for someone like him?

You look at him, gazing at his dark hair. You can feel how tightly he holds you, how possessive he was of your body.

During all this cuddling, you hear him say something. "I love you... expandable..." Did he really just say that? Him? You stare at him.

"Did you just say that?" You ask, you thought you heard wrong.

He looks up at you, you move your hands from his head, he still holds you though. "I did, I know that sounds sudden..." He says, you were in fact glad he told you that. You had accepted your feelings for him. "Sebastian...I love you too" you say, blushed, this man was just so perfect for you. You feel him getting closer to your face. You were both inches apart.

You hold his face, God you wanted to kiss him so badly. But you knew that was too sudden. You were worried that he might think that you were trying to take advantage of him. You just wanted to feel him, you wanted to give him so much love. Little did you know he also wanted to kiss you.

You move one of your hands, you slightly play with his hair. You liked how he tried to put his head even closer to your hand, like a cat wanting more pets.

He hums. "Can I...uhm..." He tried to ask something, you could tell he was unsure. "Hm?" You ask, wondering what he wanted.

"I don't know if this is too sudden but...can I...kiss you...?" You were so relieved that he asked you this. "Of course, please" you say, just wanting him.

You feel as he kisses you, a soft yet long kiss. You couldn't believe how even though he was here, he was so kind, so lovely. He then lets go of the kiss, even though you wanted more, you let him go. But then you decide to kiss his forehead. You feel his purring getting louder. He loved the attention, the care you gave him.

"You're so beautiful" you tell him, he then shivers, not in worry, but in a way that made him feel so loved and flustered. Sebastian was not used to this treatment at all. Maybe he didn't even know how to handle it, but now, he knew he could always trust you. After so many lovely encounters, why wouldn't he? "Don't say that..." He says unsure of what you had told him. "Why do you think I'm beautiful...look at me..." He was still in denial of himself, after all, look at how urbanshade had left him.

You couldn't care less, he was beautiful, from the inside and outside. He was unique.

"After all you've been through, you're beautiful in all ways and I love every part of you" you say as you gently touch his neck. He shivers at your touch. As he shivers, you look at him deep in the eyes.

"I want to show you how much I love you, may I?" You say, waiting for his approval so you can kiss his neck. "Yes..." He says, needy of your touch.

You kiss his neck, you hear him heavily breathing as he holds your back tightly. As you kiss his neck, you slightly lick it. You loved the way he was so submissive at your touch, considering how he had behaved before.

While kissing his neck, you move to then kiss his face. While you do this, you also praise him with words, you feel him smiling at your praise.

"I love you, so much" you say after kissing him on the lips again. "How have you been able to love me?" He asks, so interested in your appreciation for him. You swear that you're gonna help him escape and that you will both be free from this hell.

You look at him again, "You're special" you say while giving him a final kiss. You play with his hair as he lays on your chest. You were getting sleepy, honestly, he was sleepy too.

"We should...stay like this..." Sebastian says as he closes his eyes. It had been a while since he felt safe enough to sleep. "Goodnight sebby..." You say while kissing his forehead once more. You rest your head on his long tail that has you wrapped.

Who would know you would find your soulmate in a place like this? He saved you, he took care of you, he is your everything. You love him and you swear you will both escape from here.