Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

Itachi.

She hears the doors slide open and smells the blood on him as his footsteps come closer to where Fugaku and I are sitting seiza staring at the moon in their backyard. How cruel were they to send their own blood to be the one to strike them down. Trapped in the compound at the edge of the village like sheep being herded to their slaughter. The slaughter done by the very son they raised.

Fugaku and her have agreed to not fight not resist.

It is everything she has been taught against.

After all how could parents kill their own son?

It was he who almost killed her first.

Fugaku and the clan know how hard the birth was. How she almost died due to blood loss from giving birth prematurely.

That is exactly what Fugaku says as Itachi shudders and raises the blade to strike them.

Fugaku calls him a gentle child and makes him promise to take care of Sasuke. In her mind she wants to laugh at such a thought.

A gentle child? Would a gentle child be a kinslayer? Not even a kinslayer in a bout of madness but because of the pigs that are in charge of this wretched village she once called home. Konoha has not been her home in years. It hasn’t been since Kushina died. It has not been a home to the Uchiha since Madara claimed it so. Maybe Madara truly had cursed the clan that day.

She taught Itachi how to cook. How to throw his first shuriken. Introduced him to Shisui. Had it not been enough? Clearly it had not been enough if he has decided to choose the council over them. In her heart, she curses them all. The village council, Hiruzen, Danzo, Itachi and even the village and the comrades she fought alongside war who are now the heads of their clans.

Itachi is promising to take care of Sasuke. In his most twisted and arguably most Uchiha like feature he is promising to care for Sasuke. He’s probably doing this for Sasuke.

Sasuke.

Sasuke.

Sasuke.

Sasuke.

Her sweet boy. Her bright and innocent sweet boy. She truly mourns how she will never see Sasuke grow up now. She will never run her hand through his hair again, the rough texture he inherited from Fugaku, nor kiss his head goodnight before tucking him in.

The love of an Uchiha will burn the world down. And in the most twisted version of love, Itachi is sparing Sasuke while burning down his world. It is not right. It is not the way of the Uchiha.

She hears the blade strike Fugaku’s chest and hears his body fall and knows what is to come. The blade through her chest is quick and almost peaceful, at least she attest that Itachi is gentle in killing. The front door opens and she hears Sasuke’s feet patter the floor.

Sasuke.

No. She wants to live.

Sasuke run.

Mikoto Uchiha dies with a blade struck through her chest. Eyes staring into the full moon in the dark, clear sky. She dies with grief in her heart for her youngest son and anger at the very place that caused this to happen in the first place.

She is small. Her limbs do not feel like limbs and her body is wrong, wrong, wrong.

She begins to scream and cry at Itachi. For Sasuke. For Fugaku.

The sharingan flares and blood red eyes with three tomoe spin as quickly as she stares around at the darkness.

Uchiha Mikoto. Once jounin, friend, lady of the Uchiha clan and mother died on the full moon.

Uchiha Mikoto is born again in the city of Chiba, Japan in on the Blood moon.

Chapter Text

The Uchiha clan were originally to be believed from the high mountains, as guardians of the dragons and phoenixes, creatures of flame and desire that resided in the mountain caves. The Uchiha believed that the sharingan was given by Amaterasu herself, as she had seen how dedicated the Uchiha were to protecting her sons and daughters of fire and flight that she blessed the Uchiha for their passion and devotion by kissing their eyes. The eyes that burn the colour of fire. The eyes that are able to see the exact details and forever embed the memory of the flame. The eyes that can only be unlocked by that same passion and devotion in their soul.

It was the duty of the elders and Uchiha grandparents to pass these mythical tales to the children of the clan. Young cousins and siblings all in one room and gathered around as an elder reenacted the tales of phoenixes and dragons in old tongue and scriptures with fire in their palms, changing the shape of the flames and colours within seconds, filling the room with wide eyes and destroying the fear of heat and fire from a young age. Like the sharingan fire means warmth and change to the Uchiha. Most importantly it means home.

Mikoto is no longer home.

Like the phoenix the clan had originally protected, she had been reborn surely due to Amaterasu having seen the fire and desire in her soul to live again. It was said that the gods give and take, and Amaterasu has given her life again but has taken her away from the only world she has know. Uchiha Mikoto has been reborn in another world.

In her old world consisting of violence and blood and too many cousins and uncles for her to count, her new world is the opposite. Uchiha Mikoto is the only child of two, loving civilians in the city of Chiba, in the country Japan. Her father is Uchiha Kenta who works as a successful businessman. Her mother is formerly Nakahara, now Uchiha Chiyo who works a kindergarten teacher.

Kenta watches his newborn daughter sleeping in his arms standing next to Chiyo's hospital bed and thanks every god out there that he made it on time for her birth. He got the call that her water broke during his lunch break and promptly started choking on his rice when he heard the news. Thankfully his colleague Yashiro smacked his back hard enough that the rice dislodged from his throat and snapped him out of his initial panic. Yashiro told him to get his ass to the hospital and that he would inform their boss that Kenta's wife is giving birth and that he would be absent this week. He really owed Yashiro a drink now.

Chiyo is tired and watching him from her bed while keeping an eye on Mikoto. The room is silent, for only the occasional sound of nurses and trolleys chattering in the hallway, as they both watch over their newborn daughter. Well Kenta is. Chiyo is watching him for some reason when she should really be focused on resting.

“Are you disappointed?” Chiyo asks, her voice is small and he could still hear her heavy breathing.

Kenta turns to her in confusion and sees the worried expression that doesn't suit her beautiful face. It occurs to him that he has barely said a word to her since Mikoto was born and placed into his arms.

She thinks I want a son.

When Chiyo announced that she was pregnant, they initially wanted to keep it a secret only because Kenta never really cared for whether his child would be a son or a daughter, only that Chiyo and the child would be happy and healthy. His own mother had health complications after she gave birth to him, and died before he started first grade. His father would be disappointed in getting a daughter before a son though, only needing someone to inherit the shrine that's been in their family for generations, and Kenta can't help but be sad that Chiyo would think of him like that.

I'm not my father. I thought you knew that.

He walks over to her with Mikoto in his arms and holds his gaze in her warm brown eyes and smiles.

“She’s absolutely perfect. Thank you Chiyo.”

Chiyo’s eyes fill with joy and she gives a watery laugh and raises her arms, indicating that she wants to hold their new daughter. He passes her and sits on the bed next to them. Chiyo traces her hand across Mikoto’s chubby cheeks and grazes the tuff of wild dark hair on her head, as she looks at their daughter with love and fondness. Who would’ve thought that babies could just be born with nearly a full head of hair!

“She really is perfect isn’t she?”

Mikoto opens her dark eyes, and for a second Kenta thinks he sees a flash of red in them, and gazes at them.

“Hi Miko-chan. I’m your mama and this is papa.” Chiyo whispers hoping that her baby won’t cry. Instead the baby looks at them with dark eyes that she inherited from Kenta and stares at them with surprising clarity before falling asleep again.

Chiyo wakes up to the sun’s rays peaking through the curtains of her and Kenta’s shared bedroom and begins her daily routine. She does some light stretches, turning her neck and shoulders back and forth quietly to avoid waking Kenta and gets out of bed. She washes up and dresses before heading downstairs to prepare breakfast and lunch for her little family.

It’s 5 am and Chiyo is the only one awake and she savours the quiet morning that she has to herself by making a quick cup of tea. She hums a song that she heard on the radio while washing the rice and getting out the eggs and vegetables for the bentos today. As she wraps the bacon around the enoki mushrooms and coats them in a light dusting of flour, she thinks about the day ahead and her students.

Chiyo had decided to go back to work instead of quitting her job and staying at home, which is seen as a cardinal sin according to the gossiping housewives in their neighbourhood.

“How modern.” Nishinoya-san said in an airy voice while raising her eyebrow, as she caught Chiyo coming back from the grocery store. “I could never imagine leaving little Nozumi and my husband to an empty house.”

Chiyo half-heartedly laughed and clenched the groceries in her hands, reassuring Nishinoya-san that she was very much not leaving her husband and child alone, merely that she just missed her students so much.

No doubt Nishinoya is telling the entire neighbourhood about how Kenta can’t make enough to support their household and that Chiyo has to step up because she missed her students, oh so badly.

If Chiyo beat the futon in the backyard extra hard that day it was only known to her.

Kenta was surprised but supportive that she wanted to go back to work, and despite growing up in a shrine, encouraged Chiyo to do what makes her happy but showed concern about Mikoto coming home to an empty house. She reassured him that due to the hours at the kindergarten, it gives her enough time to pick up Mikoto and still do the housework before he gets home.

As she watches the enoki fry in the pan, turning them every couple of seconds so they cook evenly, she thinks she hears a small thud from upstairs and then heavy footsteps following up the noise.

It’s just Kenta.

The kitchen is right below Mikoto’s room and she hears Kenta’s heavy steps open the door, no doubt to wake up Mikoto and get her ready.

As if she needs the help.

Chiyo wasn’t lying when she said she wanted to go back to work because she missed her students. She loves her job and children. She was one of the only girls in her class, whose parents paid for them to continue into education after high school. She studied and worked hard to gain her Child Development and Education diploma and landed a job at her first choice of schools because she loves helping and teaching children to grow and learn. She made friends with the other teachers and parents, and even participated in a board meeting with the education department in their city about child development and support. She truly did love her job and missed it.

And maybe she would have been more reluctant to go back to work so early if Mikoto was not any less independent than she was. Chiyo knows children. She’s studied and made a career working with them.

So she knows at the bottom of her heart that Mikoto is unnatural.

As a baby she barely cried, only doing so when she absolutely needed someone to change her diaper or to be fed. There was an unusual sharpness to her eyes when Chiyo was nursing and absently talking to her to encourage brain development and bonding between parent and child, like she could actually understand everything Chiyo was babbling on about her day. Mikoto started walking when she was barely one year old and started talking even faster.

On their yearly holiday visit to Kenta’s father’s house in the countryside, Mikoto said her first word while being held in the lap of her grandfather for the first time. “Uchiha” the one year old spoke, with clarity and no hesitation in pronunciation of their last name, while pointing to the symbol of an uchiwa fan stitched on the tapestry held on the wall of the dining room. It was the first time Chiyo has ever seen her father-in law laugh, as he held his granddaughter and clasped a hand on Kenta’s shoulder proclaiming, “She is living up to our name.”

Her father-in law continued to hold Mikoto in his lap the rest of the evening and though he didn’t laugh again, he had a clear fondness for his granddaughter that showed throughout the rest of their holiday visit. He carried her around the house and the shrine grounds, telling her stories about their family history on the land and how they were descended from samurai before they found peace as priests and shamans. Mikoto despite being one, clearly held a fondness for him too as she absorbed those stories and happily toddled along with him asking him about their family history and the shrine. Kenta and his brother Koutarou, told her that he had never heard his father talk so much unless it was during prayer and blessings around the town.

“He barely talked after okaa-san died. Kou-nii told me once, that a part of him died when okaa-san died.” Kenta whispered into her hair. She held him in her arms that night, saddened at the fact that her husband lost both a mother and father at the same time.

From there Mikoto only ever spoke in full sentences and she had taken to the world with rapid fascination and growth. She was constantly reading books that were more appropriate for adults varying a wide range of subjects from war to statistics to poems. Chiyo remembers her reading phase of geography and how she asked Kenta about Nagasaki and if he and Chiyo have ever travelled outside of Japan before.

Kenta and her father-in law, who had taken to call monthly about his granddaughter’s development compared to the before once a year phone calls about their visiting times, were ecstatic about how Mikoto was a genius. A true child prodigy.

And oh how wrong they both were.

Mikoto didn’t feel like a genius. She was but also wasn’t. Chiyo had worked with children who showed advanced intelligence before, one of her first years working in the kindergarten, little Hoshi-kun only four years old was reading middle school books and asking questions about weather changes. Hoshi-kun was later tested out of kindergarten but she remembered that he liked watching Power Rangers and playing tag with the other kids. She studied child prodigies in school and when Mikoto started showed advanced intelligence, she started researching again.

Child prodigies were prodigies but they were also children. They held the brain development to hold intellectual conversations and take in and process information at a young age, but they also lacked the emotional maturity found in adults, usually leading them to become emotionally stunted from lack of peers and having to learn to process emotions of themselves and their peers at an older age leading to immaturity and arrogance.

Mikoto despite her advanced intelligence and thirst for knowledge and questions, simply didn’t feel like a child. She was just so quiet. She showed none of the childish mannerisms like temper tantrums or possessiveness over toys or even particular joy about children tv shows and games. The only childlike thing about her other than her body, was that she would space out or occasionally look past Chiyo, as if she was seeing something that she couldn’t see around the room. Kenta and even her mother say that it’s simply because she’s a girl, and girls mature faster than boys. She knows that, but the maturity that Mikoto showed it felt like she was interacting with an adult rather than an actual child.

It was the look in her eyes.

It was unnatural.

The worst part was, she thinks that Mikoto knows. Everyday after Kenta gets home from work, Mikoto runs to her father with a hug wanting to talk to her father about his day and the books that she read. She would go outside and kick a ball with Kenta in the park and walk to get ice cream together. She would come to Chiyo and help cook and pick up the puzzle they started in the living room. Mikoto was happy but she could see that she wasn’t doing these things out of joy or even curiosity, but almost like out of obligation to be a child. Out of obligation that she allowed them to be parents. Everyday before bed Mikoto turns to Chiyo and hands her a hair brush, and for 30 minutes every night Chiyo is allowed to be a mother brushing her daughter’s hair. Sometimes she looks up at the mirror while brushing the ends of her straight, dark hair and she makes eye contact with Mikoto in the mirror.

Her little girl was beautiful and she did not doubt that she would be even more beautiful as she grew up. She looked like one of those Western porcelain dolls, with her pale skin and pink lips and eyes.

It was her eyes. The ones that held years of emotion and age within them as opposed to her little girl body.

They were so wide and pitch black that she felt like she was falling into an abyss.

An abyss that said “I see you”.

Mikoto held her gaze and gave her a small, almost sad smile on her doll-like face in the mirror.

Chiyo looked away and continued brushing her hair, feeling ashamed and sad that her thoughts and feelings were so clear, that her daughter was somehow comforting her instead of the opposite. They never talked during these thirty minutes only because she never felt like there was anything Chiyo could talk about and Mikoto never said anything either, but for some reason the silence felt more oppressive than usual that night. And so for half an hour every night before bed, they could pretend that they were simply mother and daughter.

It was Mikoto that had Chiyo worried about having another child. She did want one and she knew Kenta, despite having an estranged relationship with his own brother growing up, wanted Mikoto to have a sibling as well. Chiyo herself grew up with an older brother and sister and she remembered that she loved sharing a room with her older sister, and having her brother teach her how to ride a bike.

She thinks that Mikoto would do well with a sibling but Chiyo didn’t know if she could handle having another special child. She tried to talk to Kenta about Mikoto’s maturity but he simply laughed and said that it’s because she’s smart, “She got it from her mother after all” as he kissed her lovingly.

That little girl has her father wrapped around her finger.

Leaving Chiyo alone in her thoughts about the stranger living in their house.

Chiyo asked Mikoto’s teacher about her development and how she was in doing, one day after picking up from school. Her teacher who was a former colleague of hers, was ecstatic and said that she had never seen such a well behaved child.

“Uchiha-san your daughter is wonderful! You were right. She is very developed and an avid reader.”

“Yes, Kenta and I know about our little bookworm. But how is she in the classroom?”

“She’s wonderful. Very polite and well-behaved. She’s quite popular with all the boys and girls and has no problem sharing or getting along with everyone. Just yesterday, she scolded the boys for picking on poor Aya-chan.”

“So she’s making friends?”

That’s when Satsuki-sensei pauses and contemplates. “Well she plays with everyone. I know that usually kids who are higher developed or quieter have some trouble being around other people their age, but Mikoto doesn’t seem like she’s struggling. She comes off a little shy but I think that she’s still getting used to people. I think it’s good that she’s socializing with everyone.”

But that’s not friends.

“Maybe signing her up for the local clubs would help her be with kids who have more common interests.”

Chiyo thanked Satsuki-sensei and brought up the idea of signing Mikoto up for a club to her and Kenta later that evening. Mikoto as always the polite, quiet girl didn’t oppose it, instead showing interest in a variety of clubs around the neighbourhood. They signed her up art, piano and surprisingly martial arts which she was adamant about. Kenta laughed that it was probably from seeing all the Bruce Lee movies that were playing on the tv, and was happy that his little girl would know how to defend herself.

Mikoto was thriving in her after school classes, especially the martial arts ones and Chiyo and Kenta were happy that she genuinely was enjoying herself in them making the expenses worth it.

Even if she didn’t make any friends.

It was her darkest secret that she liked that Mikoto signed up for so many classes, five times a week, only because she wouldn’t have to be alone with her in the house after school.

Chiyo wraps the three bento boxes with brightly coloured furoshiki sets them on the countertop. She arranges the bowls of rice and miso soup and sweet tamogoyaki on the eating trays and brings them to the table, just in time for Kenta to walk in with Mikoto holding his hand.

“Good morning honey” Kenta smiles and watches Mikoto get into her seat.

“Good morning kaa-san” Mikoto says in a childish voice.

They sit and give thanks and begin to eat their breakfast.

And so Chiyo got up every morning to make breakfast and lunch. She kissed her husband and they would walk Mikoto to primary school before parting ways for work. Mikoto would walk herself to her after school lessons, as they were all within 3 blocks from her school, and Chiyo would pick her up after she was done with work and the household chores. Chiyo would prepare dinner and Mikoto would do her school work at the table while they waited for Kenta to come back from work. They would play and talk about their day at dinner time. And for thirty minutes before bed she would brush her daughter’s hair, avoiding eye contact with those dark, bottomless eyes.

Chapter Text

Today would have been the day of the fire festival. She thinks, looking out the window of the three-story high school building to the clear blue skies of a June morning.

The summer fire festival was held in celebration of Amaterasu and held at the peak of her power on a scorching, sunny summer day. All the candles and lanterns of the streets and houses would be lit in different colours, only leaving the lanterns in the main street with orange flames, giving the compound an amalgamation of different warm glows. Like the fiery heat of the day, food and drinks were served only with the highest of levels of heat and mass amounts of chilis, only bringing down the spiciness for specific foods labelled for the children until they built their tolerance up. Spiced dried meat. Curry buns. Ginger tea. Corn roasted and brushed with butter and sprinkled with paprika and chilli flakes. Fresh mangos and pineapples dusted with lime, chilli powder and salt. Mapo tofu. Cold noodles coated and mixed with ground pork and chilli oil. It was a game for the children of the clan, older cousins and siblings daring each other to eat the higher spice level foods after each dance, spreading the rumour that it would help them succeed in Katon if they do. Just like it was a game to jump over the fire pits, whoever can jump the highest and through the most at a certain amount of time gets the first piece of ginger cake. It was a celebration of life and gratitude towards Amaterasu for granting the Uchiha with warmth and power from fire and for life under the sun. The entire clan gathered together to cook and eat food and give offerings of left over bones and katon to Amaterasu in the flames to show their appreciation. The songs were all sung in their ancestral tongue until throats were gone hoarse and the fire dances that the priestesses and blacksmiths practiced all year were performed to the clan and Amaterasu. The priestess of the Naka Shrine would bless the clan and would go around spreading ashes on the forehead and cheeks of the clan members to mark them as true and strong children under the sun goddess. The celebration started when the moon was at its highest peak, only ending when they watched together in weary and comfortable silence as the sun rose in the east.

Every year since her new life, she lights candles near her window facing the east and prays every morning and night this week.

“Pst Mikoto-chan” she hears a whisper to her left, and sees her classmate, Anna-chan staring at her and pointing to the textbook she’s holding. She realizes that the entire class is quiet and her teacher, Fuji-sensei is staring at her with an unimpressed look and sighs out loud.

“Uchiha-san. Please read out the next page.”

She nods and starts, “The sun rose-”

“The next paragraph Uchiha-san. Please pay attention, we’re on page 50.” Fuji-sensei cuts her off scolding her, as her classmates giggle around her.

Mikoto widens her eyes and looks down pretending to be coy and blush, not hard as she genuinely was caught off guard for once, before looking at her teacher “I’m sorry Sensei. I’ll make sure to pay more attention, I skipped breakfast this morning.”

Fuji-sensei coughs at her wide eyes and light blush and stammers. “Yes well… Stay after class during lunch, we have to talk about your day dreaming habit. And start the page.”

She nods and tucks her hair into behind her ear before beginning to read the rest of the chapter aloud, watching her classmates seem immersed in her reading, including her teacher. Fuji-sensei is a young, man in his early-twenties and she heard from the staff room when she was delivering papers that this was his first actual teaching job. Although he will no doubt scold her for her day dreaming during lunch, she knows that she’ll get off lightly and probably with some candy that she knows he keeps in his desk. He has a gruff and strict personality with a naive demeanour that can only be from youth and is genuinely passionate about his job and teaching the next generation. He is also attracted to her, whether it is from her looks and closeness of age compared to his colleagues, or from her demure and mature personality compared to the rest of her classmates. He is strict and kind and she knows that he would never do anything to her or her female classmates, especially compared to that creepy PE teacher Hamada-sensei. She doesn’t even think that he looks at her other classmates the same way nor is he really aware of the way he looks at her, so it makes him fun to tease and to see how much she can get away with things. Nothing truly serious that could get either of them in trouble, only long and coy looks, light brushes of fingers when she drops her pencil or eraser when he walks past her desk, and occasional visits after class where she asks questions about his life disguised as meetings about the material she already knows while brushing her hair away and exposing her neck and collarbones. If he was a shinobi she would feel concerned about his lust, after all what shinobi holds age as a factor to holding back on actions?, but seeing as he was a civilian, she felt no need to worry when she holds a hair pin in her sleeve and he is right now the only entertainment she has during the daytime especially at such a monotonous place like high school.

The bell rings and the first year students in class 1-C at Ushimiya High School begin to pack away their books, and head out to the courtyard or cafeteria for lunch. Anna-chan approaches her desk and curiously inquires, “Hey Mikoto-chan you really spaced out there. Are you okay? You’ve been kinda distracted all week.”

Isobe Anna is a kind girl who only wears her brown hair in a ponytail with a scrunchie, that recently moved to the area due to her father’s job promotion. She initially approached Mikoto on the first day of school to ask her to eat lunch together with the other of girls in their class and Mikoto had found herself sitting with a group of her female classmates everyday. Out of all of the girls she talks to she thinks she’s closest to Anna, simply because she doesn’t pry into her lack of love life nor seems to make a big deal that Mikoto is busy afterschool and can’t go out a lot. Anna-chan approached her with no petty jealously in her eyes or desire to use her for popularity, only genuine curiosity and desire to be her friend and offered Mikoto to use first name, so Mikoto felt that she could do the same. She doesn’t really see her as a friend, although she knows that Anna doesn’t feel the same, more like a close acquaintance. It’s not that she necessarily dislikes the other girls or her classmates in general, she just sees them as civilian children, they’re Shisui’s age and in a way, can’t really see any of them as her actual friends or equals.

She appreciates Anna’s quiet concern and kindness, as she only approached her when everyone in the class was already gone, so she settles on a half-lie. “My grandfather is not doing well. My family visits him and my uncle every year for the summer, and my dad is concerned this visit. He told me not to worry about it too much, but I guess I can’t help myself.”

“Oh no Mikoto-chan! I’m sorry about your grandfather. Are you close?” Anna says with genuine concern and sadness.

“We are but since he lives farther away and doesn’t really believe in technology it’s hard to talk to each other.” She replies trying to raise the mood, and ignoring that they have a visitor from behind the classroom door.

It works and Anna gives a small smile, “I get that, my grandparents are the same way. Old people ya know? I’m sure he’ll be okay Mikoto-chan. If you need anything though, you can tell me.”

“Thank you Anna-chan. You should go and eat. Fuji-sensei will arrive soon and I’ll try to meet you at lunch if his scolding doesn’t go on too long.” She smiles and dismisses her.

Anna snorts, “As if he can scold you Mikoto-chan.” Huh so she noticed too. “I’ll see you in the courtyard!” Anna waves and leaves with her bento almost knocking into Fuji-sensei as she quickly opens the door. “Sorry Sensei!” as she blushes and runs out of the classroom.

Fuji-sensei enters the classroom with his bento and clears his throat, as he sits down at his desk and motions Mikoto to sit at the desk right in front of him. His ears are red and his tie is loosened at his throat, no doubt he heard some of their conversation or at least the tail end of it since Anna has never learned to keep her voice down. It’s useful in these types of situations but she is a little disappointed at the possibility of her fun ending so soon. She wonders how Fuji-sensei will act around her now when confronted with his obvious puppy love/lust. Is he the type to ignore it and simply continue to being a professional? Or will he decide to double down and posture his authority to scold her in order to ignore his feelings?

Mikoto takes her seat at the front row and stares at Fuji-sensei to begin. He meets her eye and begins to blush at the awkward silence realizing that she will not begin to apologize, and she has to resist smirking. Mikoto is not afraid to manipulate and play coy when needing to survive but in this situation she will not allow a civilian man to bend her over for his own ego and to reinforce his own perceived authority.

“Uchiha-san what happened today in class can’t happen again. This is the first time I’ve caught you but your other teachers have noticed that you’ve been distracted all week as well.” He starts his scolding and tries to make his voice deeper. I guess he is the second type and she begins to tune him out.

I wonder what would happen if I said my period started this week.

“It says on your file that you have a habit of day dreaming but I think you’re too old and it’s been going on far too long.” He pauses and no doubt recalls the conversation he overheard between her and Anna. “Uchiha-san…is..is everything okay at home? Because as your teacher you can tell me. I have the right authority to inform the other staff to give you some grace if anything is happening.”

As her teacher. Grace.

This is the first time he’s actually showed interest in her life, past hobbies and small talk about the weather and school.

She really looks at him this time and allows herself to openly trail her eyes across his face and down his body. He has dark hair and a strong jaw that could be considered handsome if not for his flat nose and habit of glaring his stern, brown eyes. He is not ugly, if anything he is on the more plain side with a lean, soft body of average height signalling that he eats healthy and occasionally works out and his left hand is unadorned with a ring. The silence stretches on and she watches the blush move down his neck, as he watches her trail her eyes up and down.

At this moment, she understands why she is attracted to him in a way and why she likes to tease him so much as opposed to ignoring him like she does with the other people who are attracted to her. He reminds her of Fugaku. Not necessarily in appearance but in personality. He holds people to a strict code of morals and conduct and tries to avoid unnecessary conflict, all while holding himself to an even greater code of conduct. He consciously or unconsciously puts on a strict and blunt front to shy away from the lack of social skills and awkwardness and insecurity about himself. He is kind and believes in justice. For a second she wants to turn on her sharingan and memorize this man.

But he is not Fugaku.

Mikoto feels a sharp pang of pain in her chest and decides to tuck it away, instead wiping her eyes to make sure her sharingan will not turn on like a child who is trying to control their emotions. To Fuji-sensei’s eyes it looks as though she is beginning to cry and wiping stray tears, and she hears his heart start to beat faster and him beginning to get up from his desk no doubt, to comfort her. Before he can Mikoto stops him.

“I’m sorry Fuji-sensei. I really am okay. I’ve just been tired this week and I think that the summer homework is stressing me out.” She says demurely.

“Uchiha-san. I meant it. You really can-” He starts and Mikoto simply does not want to hear his well-natured concern and prying, so she does something bold and moves around the desk to grab his hand with both of hers and widens her eyes to look at him.

“I know Sensei. I believe you and I’m thankful that I have a teacher that cares so much about me. I really am just feeling tired this week. I promise if anything happens, you’ll be one of the first I tell.” She gently smiles and watches as his face turns red and his pupils widen. This is the closest and most physical contact they have ever had with each other.

“Of- of course Uchiha-san.” He stammers and hesitantly looks down at her hand holding his, feeling the warmth and size of her delicate pale fingers contrasting his larger hand.

This has been going on too long.

“May I go sensei?” She asks slightly tilting her head and sealing the deal by lightly caressing his hand with her thumb.

“Yeah. I mean yes Uchiha-san.” And she lets go of his hand quickly and turning to gather her bag with her lunchbox at her desk. Before she leaves the classroom she sees from the corner of her eye, him staring his hand wondering at the sudden loss of warmth. “Wait Uchiha-san” she turns and faces him, as he opens the drawer to his desk and hands her a piece of strawberry candy. Almost like a child, he sticks out his hand turning his head away like she can’t see his bright red ears and says, “Here”. She takes the piece of candy and quickly bows, “Have a good lunch Fuji-sensei.” Uchiha Mikoto opens the classroom door and pops the candy in her mouth, and leaves with a blank face and heavy heart.

She walks home alone that day, parting ways with Anna and the rest of the girls in their group about a third of the way down the road, as they headed towards the train station to visit a new cafe and she made the excuse of needed to help her mother out with grocery shopping. The other girls are used to Mikoto’s lack of participation in their after school activities and aimless talks about classmates and celebrities and dating, and simply bid her a quick goodbye. Anna looks at her more contemplatively and promises to bring her a treat and recommendations back from the cafe tomorrow at school.

After her talk with Fuji-sensei, she still had thirty minutes left of lunch break and decided to make her way to the rooftop. It was a simple lock that was placed by the administration to prevent accidents from pubescent teenagers, and she picked it using a hair pin and in less than two minutes opened to the empty, quiet space during her first week of school. She didn’t have the energy to socialize with the other girls nor felt the need to answer questions and inquisitive looks from Anna, so she decided to spend her remaining break lying on the rooftop listening to music on her cassette player and smoking cigarettes she stole from the convenience store.

Smoking was a habit she never taken to and ironically Fugaku was the one who participated in it the most. She didn’t mind, all shinobi had their vices and their ways of dealing with the world they lived in and smoking was at the bottom of the list, but she did ban him from smoking inside the house or near the children. The Uchiha were fire and were used to smoke and flame. Fire ran through their blood but one of the ways their lungs were expanded and made comfortable to the smoke and heat of Katon running through their throats, was due to the special blend of herbs and incense used throughout the entire compound that everyone inhaled. Once Itachi was born of weak lungs though, she banned Fugaku from smoking in the house, terrified that her child would feel the effects of secondhand smoking and worsen his already weak lungs even more. She remembered being surprised that he managed to perform Katon at the young age of four. She remembered making him tea with honey and rubbing his back when she found him coughing after Fugaku left for the police station.

One of the many things that fascinated her about this world was the technology and wide variety of music and art. The composition and melody and instruments and languages that could be conveyed through music was endlessly fascinating. The Five Great nations did have music but composing and performing it, was usually reserved for civilians and nobility. The Uchiha were a noble clan, even if everyone liked to forget it simply because of the colour of their eyes and the blood on their hands from being shinobi. The land of fire, their rightful portion of the land that Konoha was built on, was from rising through hierarchy and was granted the land by the Daimyo. Uchiha Madara’s grandmother was the daughter of the Fire Lord’s trusted advisor who scandalously decided to choose the shinobi life during the Warring States period, and members of the main family have held positions in court and acted as diplomats before. One of their best diplomats on envoys and negotiations was Uchiha Hikaku before Senju Tobirama put a stop to that.

Fugaku and their children, and even her as his wife, were expected to learn the skills of the ruling class which included music and the arts in general. Fugaku was excellent at the arts, something that his mother, Lady Midori was endlessly proud of. Mikoto could remember walking into Sasuke’s room and watching Fugaku rock Sasuke in his arms singing in a low, steady voice the ancestral tongue and songs of their people. She remembered giggling like a little girl in delight and surprise, as he took her in his arms and they spun around the room, as they danced and hummed along to an easy melody. Mikoto tried her best but past her admiration of paintings and songs, she was never as good as Fugaku was in the arts.

She thinks that part of her only took art and piano lessons in this new life, only to remember the songs of her people and to feel close to Fugaku once again.

Now she sits alone and holds the smoke in her throat and to feel the nicotine softening her brain until her eyes watered and she releases her breathe, watching the smoke blow away with the gentle breeze in the air. She lays her back on the rooftop half heartily eating her onigiri and closing her eyes to listen to Frank Sinatra’s ‘Fly Me To the Moon’ through her headphones and to distract herself from the rise of grief and anger whenever she thinks about her family.

Just like the sharingan, she was born with the memories of her old life. Because of the sharingan all she has to comfort herself at night are the endlessly clear memories of her old life. It is a blessing and a curse.

Mikoto walks home and contemplates what she should do after school. Once she was good enough to play the Uchiha songs on the piano and a couple more songs she liked from the radio she stopped taking lessons. The same with her art classes. The only real lessons she continued were martial arts and those were also paused for awhile, now that competition season was on and her sensei needed to focus on training people who were actually going to compete. Mikoto, although talented, never felt the need to compete in public competitions despite the constant moaning of her sensei and teammates. It didn’t really make sense to her past the incentive of winning. She was a shinobi there was no point in showing your skills to the public. And the public aspect of it reminded her too much of the chunin exams.

A bunch of old coots watching to see if they were good enough to survive and work for the village.

A bunch of old coots watching if the sharingan was strong and if they were loyal.

Mikoto decided to go home and spend her day reading and doing light katas in her room until dinner time with her mother and father. She needed to save her energy for her usual nightly activities especially after she got injured on her leg two nights ago, avoiding fiddling with the ring on her necklace, even if she felt the urge to take it off and go off running towards curses.

Tonight. Save your energy for tonight.

She got home and waited at the front door for a couple of seconds before taking a breathe and entering the house. “Tadaima”, she says to the quiet house. “Okaerinasai” she hears the low voice of her…mother, Chiyo in the living room. Mikoto takes off her shoes and dons her slippers, before making her way through the house and into the kitchen. She opens her school bag and takes out her lunch box to wash and place it on the drying rack. Mikoto scoops a couple cups of rice and washes it before putting it in the rice cooker and starting it, and takes out the ingredients for dinner in the fridge and laying them out on the counter. She also takes a few apples from the fridge and a knife from the utensil holder and starts to peel and cut the apples into slices before placing them on a plate and leaving them on the living room table in front of Chiyo, who is silently folding laundry on the couch.

Chiyo looks up briefly from her folding and quickly looks down, “Thank you” she mutters. Chiyo never meets her eyes anymore. Mikoto responds, “Of course” before gathering her school bag and making her way up to her room, where she can finally breathe once she closes the door until her father, Kenta, gets home.

It was not always like this. Or maybe it was and she simply let the ambiguousness and silence of their relationship widen until there was nothing and no words she could do or say to fill the gap. Her father tries, he truly does, but there is only so much he could do especially since he is absent until 6:30 in the evening. She thinks that Seiko was the only way to fill the gap but that was no longer possible. Her unborn baby brother brought out the truth of their relationship or lack of it.

She understands Chiyo and she tried.

Mikoto understands better than anyone the strife and heartache of being a mother to a prodigy.

The constant thoughts of inadequacy and failure and shame to be unable to comprehend what is going on in their child’s thoughts and feelings.

The constant worry if they are socializing and able to make friends and form relationships with people who are not adults. The slow and steady exclusion from their mind and life when they realize that you are not needed. The dark reassurances you tell yourself at night, that they are a genius, so they are fine and that they don’t need their mother. They have their father for parental bonding and approval. What purpose do I serve in their life other than being a figurehead to the perfect family? The sad realization that you live in a house with a stranger and that you do not know each other.

The maternal need and societal pressure to be there for the child.

Of course they need you, you are their mother. You were once one and now you are apart and living and breathing in the same time as each other. You are half of me. You are a child. How can you possibly comprehend and navigate the world of adults by yourself? You should be ashamed of yourself that you are not with your child. Your child is so smart and brilliant and talented, how could you not be proud?

The loneliness.

We were once one and now we are apart and I do not know you. I let you live and grow and breathe and now you turn your back on me simply because I do not understand what is going on in your life. We were once one and now I am left alone in an empty house to rot.

Sasuke was born out of love and loneliness. She did not love Fugaku when they had Itachi. They’re marriage was arranged and they were in war and had a duty to fufill to their clan. An heir must be born. Itachi was born out of duty and maybe that is where they went wrong. In an empty house, and Kushina being married to Namikaze, and after years of friendship and co-parenting, Sasuke was born from the love she realized she had with Fugaku. Maybe Sasuke even attributed to the love she had with Fugaku as well. They were the perfect family in the world of shinobi. A strong clan with two healthy children born from two strong shinobi. The heir and the spare.

Sasuke was never the spare to her and to Fugaku either. He was simply their son. Her son. While Fugaku getting more and more busy with leading the clan and dealing with the village’s constant strife and politics against them, and Itachi running on missions and gaining promotions faster than she could keep up with, and her best friend being dead, all she had in that big, empty house was Sasuke. Her sweet, innocent son who she promised would be allowed to grow and have a childhood that his brother and so many other shinobi could never have. Her baby boy who threw tantrums over not being able to eat tomatoes with every meal and who still needed his stuffed dinosaur to cuddle at night. In her darkest thoughts, as she cradled and held Sasuke, she would think, ‘Fugaku can have Itachi. The village can have Itachi. Sasuke is hers’. She used to pray to the gods pleading ‘Please, allow Sasuke to be hers’.

In the end she was wrong and the gods were cruel and the village was crueler. The village won and gained Sasuke. Itachi gained Sasuke. She lost and the village won and now all she has was nothing but memories of ghosts and a last name to confront her.

Mikoto really did try and be the child that Kenta and Chiyo deserved. She tried to play and make friends and stay in the appropriate school level rather than skip grades and give Chiyo the opportunity to be a mother that she never got to be with her own genius. Was it not enough? Going to school everyday and listening to lectures and doing homework she wasn’t interested in and knew she could finish easily? Having to endure snotty children and going through puberty again? They were kind, gentle civilians. Chiyo was a kindergarten teacher who loved and thrived at teaching children. Kenta was a man who chose to break away from his oppressive household and genuinely loved having a daughter rather than a son. They were good people who deserved to have a good child. It was only due to the gods that cursed them with a shinobi like her. They didn’t deserve a grieving and angry mother like her. Kenta was easier to fool, hence they had a better relationship and it was easier to bond and call him father. Chiyo with her career in working with children and maternal instinct was not.

A mother always knows best.

She does not know what she would have done if she lost Sasuke like Chiyo had lost Seiko. It was similar but different at the same time. She would grieve and be sad at the possibility of a new child but she is also a shinobi and an Uchiha with the sharingan, her life is filled with countless sadness and grief. What does one more life compare? She did not even want children until she had Sasuke. What use is there mourning and losing yourself to the potential of a child you do not know versus the child that you do know and have? How dare you compare yourself to me, who watched and cuddled with my son before he was ripped away from my arms while Seiko never even got to take his first breath?

It is a cruel thought she can admit that. Chiyo is a civilian living in a peaceful world.

And to a mother their child is their entire world.

Due to the complications of the stillbirth that almost cost her her life, she can no longer have children without the high risk of death. Kenta, who’s own mother died due to birth complications, refused to risk Chiyo’s life and leave his only daughter to grow up motherless like he did and got a vasectomy. In a single week Seiko was born and died and Chiyo’s life and future of being an actual mother ended, leaving her with a stranger as a daughter.

Mikoto’s older sister and mother would be more understanding and actually able to do the right things and say the right words to comfort Chiyo. But they are not here. Nobody from her past life is here.

Now it is only Mikoto and Chiyo living in an empty house, waiting for Kenta to come home and fill the silence.

Chapter Text

Kenta comes home late to a quiet house and tries his best to remove his shoes and put on his slippers silently but the alcohol running through his body is making it tough. It’s late, almost one o’clock in the morning on a Wednesday night and he knows he forgot to call the house to tell Chiyo and Mikoto that he would not be attending dinner that night, because the office is so busy these days.

It wasn’t a lie. The office has been hectic lately due to a product line launch and as one of the leading managers for the project, he needed to be there to support and ensure everything ran smoothly. When he got hired for the company, he was young and ecstatic, knowing the company had a reputation for a healthy work environment and well wages, and as he moved up and was finally made the head of his department, he thought that they were finally recognizing his loyal work ethic and rewarded him for the pay raise and responsibility.

No one warned him that as manager he would essentially be babysitting adults all day.

The pettiness and lack of responsibility taken from his coworkers made him want to tear his hair out, especially the new interns who refuse to simply work. What is with this generation and their refusal to do anything? The worst were his actual colleagues though. Even with his coworkers who got hired the same time as him, Kenta noticed their laziness and how they delegated their work to new hires leading to sloppy paperwork and noticeable mistakes. As a simple peer he could have laughed it off or simply offered to help take the load off their hands. Now that their work is reflective of him, he is made responsible for their actions and he’s forced to awkwardly put his foot down and scold someone his own age.

“Just because he got a fancy new title now he acts like he’s so tough and in charge” He heard, as he was walking to get a drink from the vending machine outside of the break room.

It’s because you’re shit at your job and I’m forced to talk to you about this!

Kenta wanted to walk in the break room and scream at them to justify his actions. It was only Yashiro, who saw him standing in the hallway and listening to his colleagues talk shit about him with a blank face, who led him outside the building to smoke and get some fresh air.

“I don’t think they understand that I’m literally required to talk to them about this.” Kenta says, finally breaking the silence and leans against the wall of the back building, rubbing his temples at the headache he knows is approaching.

Yashiro snorts and lights a cigarette. “I know man.” He moves his hand toward Kenta, offering him a cigarette, and usually he would refuse, but today he thinks he needs it to relieve the headache and stress that is forming. “Trust me, I think I’m one of only ones who notices that you look constipated every time you pull one of us aside. Even when you call me out, I can’t really take it to heart, considering you look like you’re about to cry asking me to fix something.”

Kenta groans out loud in embarrassment and fatigue, and points the cigarette in his mouth, inhaling deeply to try to hold on to the feeling of the nicotine, before releasing the smoke. “Why can you see it but not them?”

Yashiro chuckles, “It’s because we’re actually friends”. He turns to face him saying sternly but warmly, “Listen Kenta, half of their shit talking is because you’re technically our boss now and that’s just what you do. You talk shit about your boss, because you’re the boss and they all need a common enemy. The other half is because they’re jealous that you got a promotion and they didn’t, even though you all started at the same time. It’s personal but also not really, so try not take it to heart, man.”

Kenta hums, as the cigarette relaxes his mind and thinks about Yashiro’s mini pep talk. “Were you a coach or something? Where did this mini speech come from?”

He has a shy-smile and rubs his cheek at this response, “I was captain of the baseball team throughout middle school and high school, so I guess I’m used to the random speeches of encouragement and whole team spirit thing.” He pumps his fist in the air half heartily.

That explains why your high fives kinda hurt.

Kenta laughs at this and they continue smoking, trading barbs and enjoying the fresh air. When they finish their cigarettes after fifteen minutes, Kenta looks down at the stomped cigar ends and can’t help but ask the question that’s been floating in his head ever since he got his promotion. “And you? Are you jealous that I got the promotion?”

Kenta has never been good with confrontation. He doesn’t think that he’s a pushover and can stand up for himself, but in a head to head fight, he chooses to mediate and avoid confrontation at all costs. Chiyo told him, it’s because he is a second-born son of a single, stern father. He is used to fighting and arguing with his brother who is only four years older than him, but in the face of someone with immoveable will or silent stern looks like his father, he clams up and can’t find the words to defend himself even though he knows he is right.

Like right now he can’t look at Yashiro and decides to continue staring at the ground shyly. He feels like a child instead of a grown man and he wants to shake himself at his own cowardliness but he can’t.

Yashiro is silent. It feels so awkward that Kenta has to look up, afraid of the face his friend is staring at him with, and starts to say that he was just being stupid and that he should forget he ever said anything. Yashiro stops him. He has an easy-going smile on his face, replying, “Truthfully, not really. Maybe in the beginning, but you look like you’re in hell right now trying to wrangle everyone to do their jobs properly. I know if I was manager I would have already snapped right now.” He shakes his head and pats him on the shoulder “Trust me Kenta, I’m good where I am. And you need the money considering you have a teenage daughter. Girls are expensive after all.”

He feels his shoulder relax in relief and feels slight shame that he thought that of Yashiro. He feels himself grinning and joking lightly, “Aren’t you divorced? You need the money too.”

Yashiro groans out loud and slumps his shoulders dramatically, as they begin to walk back to the office together. “Don’t remind me. Paying alimony every month makes me want to never get married ever again.” Kenta laughs and feels lighter and more confident going back in.

Yashiro is his friend, someone that actually knows him. He’s the only one that knows the struggles that Kenta deals with when he’s at work. And he’s the only one that knows the silence and weight of it when he goes back home to his wife and child. So whenever he offers to get a drink together after work, Kenta can’t help but join him. Partially because he wants to hang out with his friend, but also because he doesn’t want to go home so early.

The miscarriage and Kenta’s subsequent vasectomy broke something in his and Chiyo’s marriage. It broke something in their entire household that he doesn’t know how to fix. He was disheartened when he found out his son did not make it out alive. He also felt an unjust amount of anger.

The pregnancy was hard for Chiyo, so unlike how it was for Mikoto that he found himself calling his father, Uchiha Kentaro, in panic when Chiyo was rushed to the hospital at three am in the morning when she found blood dripping down her leg. Chiyo consented to the doctors inducing an early labor to try to save the child, even at the cost of her own life.

At half past three in the morning, Kenta found himself waiting outside the hospital room with ten year old Mikoto, wondering if his wife and child were alive. He was walking back and forth in the hallway until he heard another scream come from the doors, and Kenta quickly excused himself to run to the nearest bathroom. He barely made it to the toilet before throwing up and crouching over on his knees, heaving with tears running down his face, as he tried to search through his bag to reach for his phone. With trembling fingers, he dialled his father’s house waiting for him to pick up, please I need you Otou-san please pick up, until he heard the phone answer and a low, raspy voice come through the line.

Kenta could barely hear what his father said as he broke out in sobs and coughing harshly, feeling like he needed to throw up again but couldn’t. He couldn’t. He never could do anything. He’s so useless. Chiyo is going to die and he’s just so useless.

He could barely feel the cold, hospital floor tiles digging into his knees, before he felt a small hand on the arch of his back, rubbing in circles. A small voice came through the numbness of his head, and the circles on his back continued until they began to move up and down his spine. The voice became clearer, and he finally heard it, “Breathe. In and out. In and out.” It was a child’s voice, not his father’s.

Kenta slowly turned his head over his shoulder, and saw his little girl with her wide dark eyes, rubbing his back. “Breathe Papa. In and out.” He began to follow her instructions and slowly his heaving stopped and his breathe was evening out. “That’s right Papa. In and out.” He closes his eyes and inhales- Chiyo is screaming and there’s blood. Blood on their bed- the coughing and panic begins rise again.

“Shhhh. Just breathe Papa. Mama will be okay. The doctors will help her. Just breathe and focus on my voice. Just follow my voice. And go in and out.” Her soft, high pitched voice and the warmth from her small hand rubbing circles on his back, breaks through his panic again. Until Kenta feels present and alive again, as the thirty-three year old, focuses on following his daughter’s instructions and his heaving and panic subsidizes. He can feel the tiles of the floor digging into his knees, the bright fluorescent lights directing their warmth and attention towards him, his right hand grasping the ceramic toilet bowl and his left hand gripping his phone like a lifeline to his ear.

He slowly unravels his back from the toilet and releases his right hand, and sits on the balls of his feet. It isn’t until he hears the breathing on the other side of the phone, that he realizes his father is still on the line. His father has heard Kenta throw up and sob and his ten year old daughter calm him down.

“Kenta.” His father’s stern and slightly raspy voice says through the phone.

Shame hits him quickly, as he looks around his surroundings and sees Mikoto moving to the side, her small hand now gripping on to his arm holding him steady.

What the fuck am I doing? What the actual fuck am I doing? I’m letting my child comfort me. The thoughts race through his head only pausing when he hears his father speak again, “Kenta.” He swallows and tries to prepare himself for no doubt a scolding and dress down on his failings as a man and as a father. The sad part is, he can’t even deny it in this situation.

His father never explicitly said that he was disappointed in Kenta or that he saw him as a failure, but growing up all his life his father never gave him praise nor encouragement. All he knew throughout his entire childhood was the harsh stare in his eyes, and Kenta just knew that his father did not approve of him.

“Yes father?” He says, wincing at himself for the meekness in his voice. “Are you okay now?” his father asks, and even through the arguably shitty cell service, Kenta can hear the concern in his voice. “Yeah. I-I think I am now”, he tries his best to respond, coughing slightly at the dryness of his voice.

“Good. That’s..that’s good.” His father stammers and the silence is brought back, except for the occasional breathe and cough. Kenta is about to say goodbye, and to apologize for calling so late, when he hears his father gather his breathe and begin to speak.

“Chiyo will be okay. She is strong. Your wife will be okay Kenta.” It shocks him and Kenta feels his mouth drop open. He wants to believe him. He feels like a little boy again wanting to believe that everything his father says is true and right. He looks down at the floor, before saying quietly and not unlike a child again, “How do you know? What if something happens?” Like Okaa-san, the words go unsaid.

He can hear his father’s voice shutter, and hears a deep breathe being taken from the line. “Himiko always had health issues Kenta. I knew her since we were kids and she’s always had a weak body. She was always catching colds and was never able to play outside too long. Sh-it, her pregnanacy with Koutarou was hard for her but she made it. Her-your birth was a surprise but she made it through. It was simply… a bad winter for her. Chiyo is a strong and healthy woman. That is why I know she will make it.”

Kenta is stunned into silence, and surprisingly his father continues talking. “Your daughter is also strong. When Himiko was admitted to the hospital and you were an infant with your grandmother, Koutarou was the only thing keeping me from not making a hole through the hallway with my pacing. There is shame in many things Kenta,” he pauses, and Kenta could imagine him now, sitting in his dark room and feeling the emptiness and loneliness of the house his own parents once resided in, “But there is never shame in grieving for your wife and child.”

His mother after her death was the ghost in their house. After she died, she was never mentioned and although it was never forbidden to talk about her, Kenta knew growing up that she was not to be spoken about. Her absence was felt so gravely in all their lives that it was too painful to bring her up.

Kenta remembers being in his senior year in high school and finding a picture of her when he was cleaning up his room and down sizing his belongings and childhood toys for spring cleaning. He looked down at the dusty picture and traced the image with his fingers, and realized that tears were falling down his face, wetting the glass. Kenta felt himself falling to his knees and turning to his side on the floor, curling his body inwards like a ball, holding the picture frame of his mother close to his chest. He remembers the all encompassing grief and sadness, not only for his mother, but for himself because he realized he could barely remember what she looked like before finding the picture.

I’m so sorry I don’t know you.

After the sobs and wave of grief, he remembered the anger and rage and jealousy. At his father for never talking about her and taking down all her photos. At his brother for being alive before him and being able to actually experience what it felt like to live and be held by her. The rage and bitterness felt too much for his body to handle that he started choking on his sobs. That was the moment he decided to move out and attend university in the city, only speaking to his father and brother a couple times during the year, more out of obligation than anything. His petty spite and childhood rage held on to him, until he had his own daughter who was completely enamoured by her grandfather and the shrine and forced him to visit and interact with his family more often than what he was comfortable with.

And now his daughter is inadvertently forcing him to talk to his father again.

No. Mikoto didn’t make me call my father.

I did that all on my own because for a single minute I had to talk to the only person I knew could understand what I’m going through.

Kenta looks down at his phone and realized the call has been going on for over thirty minutes. He was having a panic attack in the bathroom for over thirty minutes and his father had actually stayed on the line.

He looks down and sees Mikoto is still holding on to his arm. He stares at his little girl as he watches him talk to her grandfather and gives her a nod. “Thank you Otou-san. Really…thank you.” His father clears his throat and huffs over the phone. “You are an Uchiha, Kenta and Uchiha are strong. Goodnight.” and hangs up.

Kenta puts the phone back into his bag and scoops Mikoto into a hug. He wraps his arms around her body and his hand lands at the back of her head gently holding her tight against his own body, and they stay like that for awhile, as he feels MIkoto wrap her arms around him.

She’s so small.

Mikoto looks like a doll. She’s so delicate and bird-like but he feels the slight muscle in her arms and body, and he knows that the karate and judo classes that they signed her up for is paying off. He feels her dark soft hair between his fingers and looks down at her pale skin wrapped around him.

“Are you feeling better now Papa?” her delicate voice peeks through, slightly muffled as she’s being held against his shoulder. Kenta shudders, and knows that he shouldn’t feel shame or embarrassment for grieving his wife and child, but he can’t help it when he’s seeking comfort from his delicate, ten year old daughter.

He breathes in the scent of her hair. It smells like honey and oat shampoo, the one that he knows Chiyo uses. “I am Miko-chan. I’m sorry. I’m so, so sorry you have a weak dad.” He feels Mikoto slap his back a couple of times and he gently releases her, still keeping her close in his arms. She grabs his face in her hands and stares into his eyes with a surprisingly fierce glare. “You’re not weak papa. Just sad.” she says, with all the determination and confidence that she possibly can.

He thinks he spots a flash of red in her eyes. Onyx eyes stare back at him and she speaks so calmly and determined that he can’t fight her to deny her statement.

She looks like him, he realizes*.*

And how strange it was, to see a completely different human have your face. You are my flesh and blood and carry my hopes and dreams and you look like me. You have my face.

The hair texture and wide eyes and mouth are from Chiyo. But the sharpness in her face and colouring of her eyes and hair and skin are all him, Uchiha Kenta. From the moment he held her Kenta knew he would give his life for Mikoto, but as he roams his eyes up and down at her, he has never felt more like a father than now. He truly understands the parental inclination and love to hide their child away and lock them up from anything and anyone that could harm them in the world.

I would burn the world down for you Mikoto.

Kenta is not a violent man but he can see it now. He truly would tear the world apart for his little girl.

His father was right. Uchiha are strong.

He kisses her forehead and picked her up trying not to grunt at her weight, because the martial arts lessons are definitely paying off, as they headed back into the hallway waiting for Chiyo and the new addition to their family.

Chiyo did make it, but their poor baby son, Seiko did not. After the cremation and following check-up, the doctor confirmed that they would not be able to have another child without risking Chiyo’s life again. So Kenta ordered a vasectomy operation, in order to never feel that fear of waiting in the hospital room ever again.

Those weeks and months felt like a blur. Emotions of grief and sadness and anger was all he remembered and felt in the house. The loss of Seiko was devastating to Chiyo and he felt the loss of the potential of his new child too, but for Chiyo it was life-changing. She fell into depressive state barely leaving their bed and even more rarely the house, leaving Kenta to pick up the chores around the house and to care for Mikoto. When she did leave their bed, he would find her sitting in one of the living room chairs simply staring out the window into the backyard or even worse, staring into the empty darkness of the living room with such blankness that it scared him.

Koutarou’s wife, when he asked about Chiyo’s depression and encompassing grief, just shook her head and simply said only a mother could truly understand her grief and to let Chiyo be sad and support her. But Kenta didn’t know how to support her. He already was supporting her. It had been almost four months and he was stressed and tired and sad at being the one to do all the household chores and be Mikoto’s primary caretaker, and now his wife’s primary caretaker too.

The vasectomy was the almost their breaking point. Sometimes when he lays in bed and stares up at the ceiling in their dark room, he understands that his hasty operation was in part to prevent Chiyo’s life from being in danger but also out of anger and spite. It felt like when he discovered his mother’s picture in high school again, the emotions and impulsive thoughts kept racing and he couldn’t stop them.

You know that my mother died and you want to risk it again.

You know how hard it was to grow up with just my dad

You know how hard it is for my father to talk about my mother. Why would you want the same to happen to me?

I can’t let you die. I can’t be alone.

Don’t leave me alone Chiyo how could you?

Of course I would choose your life over Seiko’s you’re my wife.

Why would you want Mikoto to grow up motherless?

Why are you still grieving Seiko like you don’t have an alive child to care for?

Seiko and the vasectomy broke something in their marriage. Kenta knows he was the one to cause their true breaking point, and that it was his fault that caused any singular hope of their household and marriage of being fixed, to be nothing more than a pipe dream.

Oh if the gods were real and true, how he prayed to take back his mistake.

Chiyo and Kenta’s marriage finally snapped on a random Thursday night on a nice spring evening. He got home late from the office stressed and tired from work needing overtime, and getting used to his new responsibilities and workload as junior department head. It was so busy, even Yashiro barely had time to chat and everyone in the department was eating lunch at their desk in one hand, and filing paperwork with the other. He knew he would have to go to work extra early tomorrow to finish everything from the previous night and was debating whether to make Mikoto dinner or simply leave some money on the table so she could call for takeout. Kenta came home and flicked the lights on in the kitchen to see Chiyo sitting at the dinning table looking blank and staring out into space.

How long was she sitting in the dark for?

Kenta sighed and placed his work bag down on the floor, before carefully crouching down and holding Chiyo by the shoulders in front of her. “Chiyo” He says in a quiet voice, and giving her shoulders a gentle squeeze. “Chiyo. You have to get up” he says, squeezing her shoulders again.

She moves her head to face him and Kenta is faced with her mournful brown eyes. “Kenta. I miss Seiko” she says quietly and her voice is raspy like she hasn’t used it in a while. She has not. Kenta feels a pang in his chest and sighs sadly, before grasping her head and moving it to his shoulder to hug her. “I know, darling. I miss him too.” She’s crying now and he feels the tears wet his shirt, as he rubs her back in small circles. They stay like that for a couple of minutes, until he hears her sobs lessen and her small voice whispering, “I don’t know where to put all my love now.”

Kenta freezes. He takes a deep breathe and tries, he truly does try to be careful with his words towards his sobbing wife, as he says, “You have me. And we have Mikoto. Maybe you should put all your in love us, honey.”

Now Chiyo pulls away from him quickly, and he stares in shock at her movement and the stark grimace on her face, as she hisses, “That child doesn’t need me. You don’t need me. Seiko needed me.”

And Kenta. Kenta snaps.

All the months of waking up early and making breakfast and lunch for their family. All the months of going to work and forcing grown adults to do their job and sucking up to clients and bosses who make more money in an hour than he does in an entire week. All the months of running home to do the chores and to play with Mikoto so she actually knows she has one parental figure that hasn’t abandoned her. All the months of coming home scared to make sure his wife hasn’t killed herself out of grief and lack of self-care. All the months of finding Chiyo just sitting there in the dark, not speaking or moving, simply doing nothing.

“What the fuck are you talking about Chiyo?! How could you say that? Of course Mikoto needs you. Of course I fucking need you. How can you not see that?!” He screams at her, and grips her shoulders until he sees his knuckles turning white.

Chiyo’s eyes are stone cold and she sneers while screaming back, “She has never needed me! Why can’t you see that Kenta?! Why are you making me out to be the villain? She has never in her life needed me. There’s something wrong with her. Why am I the only one who can see that?!”

Kenta feels his body shake with rage, and he begins to shake Chiyo’s shoulders. “What is wrong with you Chiyo? What is wrong with you? I’ve tried to understand you. I’ve tried to support you. We both lost Seiko. Our son is dead Chiyo. And now we have to accept it and live for our surviving child.”

Her eyes fill with rage and she says in the coldest tone, a tone Kenta has never heard her speak with, “Mikoto should’ve been the one to die. Seiko was the child that we were supposed to have. Not her, she replaced the child we were supposed to have.”

Kenta doesn’t really know what happened next. He does but it feels like he’s almost staring down at himself, a version of himself that he does not recognize. It feels like he’s watching a movie or play-by play screening, starring him and Chiyo as the main characters.

A young man and woman meet at the corner of a street on a rainy October afternoon. They’re both soaking wet because they forgot their umbrellas and to check the weather, and now they’re huddled under the roof of a small stand selling beef teriyaki skewers waiting for the rain to stop. They make conversation and giggle at their shared forgetfulness. He notices she’s wearing a light coloured shirt and blushes that he can see the outline of her bra, and looks down nervously as he offers her his jacket. She blushes and takes it, buying him a teriyaki skewer as a thank you for the jacket. The bus stops near them and they both race towards it, slightly giddy that they’re both taking the same direction. They sit next to each other, soaking wet and feeling the warmth seep in their bones. The woman notices his sharp cheekbones and how dark his eyes are, so dark that she feels like she could stare into them forever and never reach the bottom. The man notices her delicate hands and pink smiling mouth, and he feels like wants to keep her smiling forever. They have to part eventually but keep contact with each other in order to exchange the jacket and to eat teriyaki together again.

Chiyo is laying on the floor with her hair covering her face, as her left hand is holding her cheek. Kenta is standing over her with his right hand raised.

He hears himself- is that really him?- say in cold lifeless anger, “How dare you say that. You will never speak about Mikoto like that again.”

Chiyo drops the hand holding her cheek and turns her head slowly to look at him. It’s like something snapped back in place. The movie has been paused and he can truly grasp the situation around him. He sees her on the floor. He turns and sees his right hand raised and slowly drops it to his side. Chiyo is on the floor-his wife is on the floor-her hair is lifelessly dropping to the sides of her face and he can see the bright red mark on her cheek, as she simply stares at him with her wide brown eyes blankly, as if she cannot recognize him.

Kenta opens his mouth and closes it not knowing what to say as the words-any words-try to make themselves appear and die in his throat. But he can’t think of anything to say. No words appear that can help him grasp their situation. No words can justify or fix anything, because his wife is on the floor with a red mark on her face looking at him like he is a stranger.

Kenta can’t see the look in his eyes but he’s staring at Chiyo in the same way.

So husband and wife, Uchiha Kenta and Uchiha Chiyo, married for twelve years and parents to a ten year old daughter, stare at each other in silence. Eventually Chiyo begins to get up and walks away, and he hears her footsteps move up the stairs and the door shutting close into their bedroom.

He does not follow her. Kenta stands alone in the kitchen and looks down at his hands, before he slowly makes his way up the stairs and turns right, opening the door to Mikoto’s bedroom.

Mikoto is in her bed under the covers, only her dark hair peeking out and her body is facing the wall. Kenta leans against the doorframe of her bedroom and takes a second to stare at her sleeping form moving up and down lightly with breath, before making his way into her bed under the covers. He wraps his arms around her over the covers and curls his body against her, gently spooning her as he breathes in the scent of her hair. He closes his eyes and feels the fatigue of the night settle into his body, and feels a slight rustle, before a small hand moves to hold his.

Kenta feels his breathe hitch and his body shudders as he curls furthers inwards and around her, and the tears run down his face before he realizes it. Mikoto’s hand grips his and she gives him a small squeeze. She is awake and he buries his face further in her hair and the pillow around him to try to muffle his sobs. It’s likely that she woke up to him and Chiyo screaming at each other. It’s likely she heard her own mother say those awful words about her. It’s likely she heard her mother’s body hit the floor.

One of the worst parts about their argument tonight is that he knows deep down that Chiyo is right. Not about Seiko and never about Mikoto being a replacement. Kenta is not completely blinded by paternal love and can see with his own two eyes that Mikoto is unnatural. She is just too quiet, too sullen and too smart to be a normal child. But when he thinks about her rubbing circles on his back and telling him to breathe as he’s crouched over a toilet, and when she runs into his arms and calls him ‘Papa’, and when she’s holding his hand and allowing him to cry into her hair in her small bed, he can’t find it in himself to care.

Mikoto is his daughter, an Uchiha, and he will love her regardless.

The next morning Kenta wakes up bright and early. His body naturally wakes up due to being raised in a temple and needing to join morning prayers, and corporate life has further attuned him to waking up before his alarm, no matter how late he slept the previous night. He blinks groggily, and turns to lay on his back only to find himself to blinking and staring at the glow in the dark stars pasted on the ceiling. He roams his eyes around the light pink bedroom walls and the small uchiwa fan tapestry surrounded by posters of the constellations, and the large white bookshelf and desk filled with books. There’s a record player next on top of a stool next to the bookshelf, and he realizes that the bottom shelf is actually half filled with record albums. He tries and fails to see the albums that she has collected and instead turns his focus on the titles of the books, as he feels his body begin to wake up and tries to ignore the tingling sensation coming from his feet as they hang off of the bed.

‘Japanese Reflections on World War II and the American Occupation’, ‘National Geographic: Along the Continental Divide’, ‘Norwegian Wood’, ‘No Longer Human’, ‘Crime and Punishment’, ‘War and Peace’, ‘The Master and the Margarita’, ‘Paradise Lost’, ‘The Myth of Sisyphus’

Kenta finds himself surprised, not at the fact that Mikoto’s reading taste is so advanced although it does concern him that his ten year old daughter is reading ‘No Longer Human’ out of all books, but that she actually managed to find so many translated works from so many Western authors.

He knows from how widely he can spread his arms on the bed that Mikoto woke up before him and is probably already downstairs preparing herself breakfast. He should get up too but the fatigue and restlessness and shame racing through his head from last night, makes him bury his head under the covers and he turns to his side curling himself into a ball, as he feels himself close his eyes and relax his breathing under the darkness.

Eventually he hears slight noise from downstairs, and can feel the sun’s rays growing brighter through the curtain and he knows he has to get ready for the day. He washes up, not bothering to change his clothes-avoiding his bedroom because Chiyo, and walks into the kitchen and dinning room area only to blink to see Chiyo.

She is behind the kitchen counter and pouring sauce into a packed bento, next to her is an already closed bento on the counter. He blinks rapidly and rubs his eyes thinking that this must be a dream, turning his head and seeing Mikoto at the fully set table of rice and grilled fish, with a blank stare as she watches Chiyo. Mikoto makes eye contact with him and slightly nods, confirming that he is not hallucinating and that this is real. Kenta slowly sits down on his seat at the table, watching Chiyo wrap brightly coloured furoshiki around each bento before she joins the table.

Chiyo looks up and his breathe catches. The mark on her cheek is darker and blooming red and he wants to bury himself in a hole and never come out, before she smiles and claps her hands together, saying in a quiet voice, “Well, let’s eat”. No one moves a muscle. Until Mikoto puts her hands together softly saying, “Itadakimasu” and picking up her chopsticks to take some fish. Kenta finds himself following her actions and minutes pass before, Chiyo begins to do the same.

They eat in silence. Mikoto and Kenta only occasionally looking up to watch Chiyo, as Chiyo sips her tea and hums as she eats a piece of fish with rice. Mikoto finishes breakfast first and packs up her bag to prepare for school, as Kenta quickly moves to follow her, not trusting the tenuous silence and the thought of being alone with Chiyo.

For a split second, he begins to hope and wonder that maybe last night did not happen.

That the past months have been nothing but a blimp and a cruel nightmare. That they can save their marriage and can raise their daughter together. That he understands how hard it is take on all the household chores and that he has no problem splitting them more evenly. That they can finally talk and he can lay in dogezma and apologize and to swear that he would never raise a hand to her ever again.

But before he can leave for work, Chiyo stops him at the door and puts the bento in his hands.

He looks at her and realizes how naive and terrible those thoughts were, because Chiyo, with her straight brown hair, nose dusted with light freckles, pouty pink lips and blooming hand-shaped marked cheek, is staring at him with a blank face and completely dead eyes.

His breathe catches and everything and anything he wants to say wholly dies on the tip of his tongue. His shoulders slump in resignation, and he looks down, before replying in a meek voice, “Thank you”. She turns away back into the house, as he opens and closes the front door and feels himself rest his forehead against the door trying to will away the despair and tears, at the knowledge that his marriage is truly over.

Kenta does not see Mikoto watching him from across the street and that she saw their entire interaction from meters away with bright red, sullen eyes before turning away and walking herself to school.

Uchiha Kenta wakes up and has breakfast with his wife and daughter. He heads to his job on the train and works diligently at his desk before making his rounds around the department, and awkwardly scolding his peers for their poor work ethics. After six in the evening, he files his remaining papers and sits at his desk and stares out the window of his high rise office before his co-worker and friend, Yashiro knocks on his office door and sees the melancholic look on his face and offers to get dinner and a drink together.

More and more often he finds himself accepting because he is a coward and cannot bring himself to take the train back to a silent and static house. Sometimes he cannot stand the house but misses his daughter so much, that he brings her to join him and Yashiro for dinner. He tries to ignore Yashiro’s look of shock and wandering eyes at Mikoto’s beauty. Sometimes he leaves the office and comes home to food hot and ready at half past six on the table, and eats dinner with his listless wife and too keen daughter in silence.

No matter what though, Kenta will always find himself coming home and slipping under the covers of his and Chiyo’s bed and staring up at the ceiling. His thoughts and prayers to the gods before falling asleep are always the same.

When did it all go wrong?

Chapter Text

Mikoto is fifteen again and eating dinner with her parents in silence, just like they always do. Her father Kenta actually came home on time, and while she does hold affection for the man and does pity him for the oppressive atmosphere in their household, she can’t help but sneer at his cowardliness for leaving her alone most of the time with Chiyo.

If she was a real teenage girl, she would feel abandoned and resentful at her father. But she is not, and part of her is grateful for their lifeless house because she is no longer babied, and has to pretend to be a child. She does truly care about Chiyo and Kenta, and allowed herself to indulge in parental affection that she hasn’t experience since her actual parents died, a couple of years after Sasuke was born. Civilian life and parenting was different, not terrible but different, and it was fun to be a useless, care-free child sometimes, and to pretend that she is not consistently haunted by the blood of her old life at night.

Chiyo and Kenta were younger than she was when she died and are perfectly normal civilians, so she sees them more as colleagues or pets rather than actual parents. After a certain amount of years and genuine moments of affection and aimless joy, she got tired of playing pretend and found herself craving for her independence. Mikoto feels somewhat terrible that her parents deteriorating marriage and subsequent miscarriage, gained her her wish of independence and freedom. It’s almost funny in a morbid way. The gods truly are cruel.

She is finished eating her dinner and is about to put her dishes in the sink to soak, when Kenta decides to break the silence. “Miko-chan, remember I’m dropping you off at the train station next week for your grandfather’s house. Your Uncle Kou, said that Otou-san isn’t doing very well, so you might need to pack… some black clothes and anything you want to give him. I’ll join you earlier this year just in case too.”

Mikoto is surprised at this news but nods and makes her way up into her room to start packing. Every month since she was a toddler, she calls her grandfather on the phone for at least a two hour chat, talking about her life or about their family. She tries to remember their last conversation and she knows he was quieter and coughing a bit more, but she didn’t realize he was that sick. Technology and long-distance communication can hide a lot, and she curses at herself for her naivety and feels a pang in her chest at the very, real possibility that her grandfather is dying.

Out of everyone in her small family, she is closest to him, and she knows that she is his favoured grandchild too, even more than her cousins who live in the temple with him. Every summer she begged to stay at the temple, surprising her parents and uncle, and she remembered Kenta being stunned that his father indulged her and allowed it especially since she is a girl, contrasting his stern traditional values and opinions.

Mikoto is used to being favoured. She was chosen to be anbu and the Jinchuruki’s bodyguard because of her strength in the battlefield and already existing friendship with Kushina. She was chosen by the clan elders to be the clan head’s wife because she managed to win over Fugaku’s mother, Lady Midori, with her tenacity for weapons and loyalty towards the clan. Winning over people is easy for her with her face, manners and hidden viciousness and ambitions and she cannot deny the pride she feels for being chosen.

She does take notice that Kenta is not close to his brother, the head priest of the temple, nor is he close to his father, most likely due to childhood insecurity and spite that never managed to completely go away. But every summer, he made an effort to take her and stay for at least a week in the childhood home he ran away from, with people he felt awkward with, all because his daughter is strangely besotted with her grandfather. It raises her affection for him, and she is grateful and will never forget his emotional sacrifice for her.

Over the years the awkwardness and resentment has lessened, and she sees that Kenta can actually have a full conversation with his brother and father without getting a constipated look on his face. It makes her heart feel full.

Mikoto decides to play some music while packing, and chooses Buck-Tick’s ‘Aku No Hana’ album from her pile of records. It’s more heavy-rock than what she typically goes for, but she enjoys the sounds of heavy bass and deep vocals. It is also perfect for distracting her from the stilted conversation, Chiyo and Kenta are no doubt trying to have downstairs.

She finishes packing and moves to lay on her bed to finish the book on the subject she is currently obsessed with. Statistics and stochastics in the financial market is fascinating in a way, that she wasn’t necessarily interested in it, but that, there was nothing even close to it in the Elemental Nations. It is a useful skill to have in this world, the ability to make and invest money and she memorizes the book with the sharingan for future use, since she knows that once she is a legal adult she will not rely on her parents for financial needs.

The stock market is a game and was quite easy to comprehend, only needing the correct terminology and an eye for seeking patterns to gain a grasp for it. It genuinely does amaze her that thousands of people use and invest billions of dollars into this game, just to further fund corporations that have taken a life and reputation of their own, now that they are worth enough money. This game along with the general concept of capitalism and the growing wealthy gap in societies all over the world is so archaic, it makes the Elemental Nations seem peaceful.

Once Hidden Villages were formed the political and socio-economic power shifted into a more symbolic relationship between the nobility and shinobi. Madara and Hashirama creating Hidden Villages did not just change the shinobi system to bring peace amongst warring clans within countries, they finally gave shinobi leverage against the ruling class. One shinobi can easily kill thousands of civilians in under a minute. One academy student could kill ten samurai in under a minute. Now that all clans are united under one village, one Kage, how will the nobility survive? Would they truly risk hiring foreign shinobi from rivalling nobles into their land to in order to fight a future rebellion? The answer was yes and no.

Shinobi are mercenaries. We are tools and at the end of the day, and in exchange for services at a set rate, Hidden Villages were allowed to live on the land and pay taxes to the Daiymo. That was their relationship with the Daiymo and ruling class. It was simple and cut throat and cruel but it is the only life she truly knows.

She does not understand the ambition and desire for money the wealthy, civilian upper-class seem to hoard, past the need for survival and the occasional celebration and gifts. The Uchiha can appreciate pretty things and are known for encouraging fine craftsmanship and the passion for art, but what use is jewellery and silk kimonos compared to food and shelter and weapons? What use is a pretty bracelet when you are starving in war? Those frivolous things are something only civilians can enjoy, hence they have created a whole system designed to hoard their wealth to feel superior over others. It was human greed at its finest and it made her want to laugh at the futility of it all, as much as it comforts her, because humans truly are the same in every world.

And they call shinobi monsters, when their money is made from the blood of the poor and hungry. Shinobi do not want. That is not how a tool should think. Tools have no desires other than to be needed and used, by whoever is strong enough to be their wielder.

Mikoto tries not to think about the shinobi relationship with Daiymos too much, especially as she reads about different revolutions around the world, surrounding economic and cultural crisis’ like the development of Maoism and the French Revolution and the Meji Restoration; simply because it fills her with despair and rage, at what life could have been. How her clan and Sasuke and so many others could have lived in peace if not for the rich controlling them.

She hears a knock on her door and lowers her music from the record player, as she gets off her bed to answer it. It’s her father Kenta, “I’m going to bed Miko-chan. Don’t stay up too late, okay honey?” Mikoto bids him goodnight and allows him to plant a kiss on her forehead. She turns off her music and lays in bed to finish her book until she hears her parents get ready for bed. Mikoto waits for another thirty minutes, until she knows Kenta is fully asleep since he has work tomorrow morning, and moves to close her bedroom light and heads to her closet where her swords are hidden at the very back.

Mikoto does some light stretches before changing into black cargo pants, long sleeved shirt and vest, a makeshift copy of her jounin uniform with the best materials she could find. She looks in the mirror to braid her hair with wire and wrap it into a tight bun. Her weapons pouch is rolled up and strapped into her vest, while her kunai are tucked into her boots. She pats the senbon within her sleeves, before grabbing her dual katanas and donning the kitsune mask and making her way through her bedroom window. She does this in under a minute.

Mikoto channels cursed energy to her feet and walks up her house and on to the roof, once reaching her spot, she does a pseduo-shunshun and races across the roofs in her neighbourhood. Once she is far enough away from her neighbourhood, she takes off the ring hanging off her neck and shoves it in her jacket pocket, allowing her cursed energy to burst attracting curses and sorcerers alike, as she begins her hunt.

Just like many things in this new world that fascinated her, the distinct lack of chakra was one of them and the first thing she noticed. How was that possible though? Chakra is a life energy. It existed in everything and everyone even through the air they breathed in. How are these humans living and breathing without it? What is this energy she senses inside of everyone if it is not chakra? What is powering her sharingan if not chakra?

The simple answer was cursed energy.

Cursed energy was so similar yet so different than chakra, that it made Mikoto feel like she was in long and convoluted genjutsu from how similar it was. Chakra was centred and moved through the body from tenketsu points like veins in the circulation system. From there as long as the Gates were opened enough and someone had the right reserves, it could be manifested using spiritual and physical energy in the form of jutsus and made to enforce the body. Chakra made sense, it was a complete and separate, structured system within the body hence the limits of said system were dependent on the user and their reserves.

Cursed energy on the other hand did not make sense. Instead of chakra powering the world, cursed energy was what kept everyone alive. Everyone had it, and it was only due to the sharingan and her sensing abilities that she could see in civilians that it seemed to almost leak outwards instead of inwards. It felt like an oily, slick pit in the base of her stomach and was much harder to control than chakra. It felt so strange to be six years old again, having to actively encourage this energy to circulate throughout her body evenly and to actually force it, in order to gain control over which part of her body to apply it to. She spent so much time just to achieve a simple walk up a tree, not to mention, sneaking out to the community centre pool to learn how to water walk.

Women typically have less chakra reserves than men but they had greater control. Mikoto is an Uchiha and both her parents were Uchiha. They were a clan fabled for strength and being able to perform and copy limitless jutsus simply with the sharinagn; so although she will never have the seemingly endless chakra that an Uzumaki will have, she does have large chakra reserves and prided herself in her great control.

In this world her cursed energy reserves were similar to her chakra reserves. It is why this cursed energy is so frustrating. She’s never been a genius like Itachi and Hatake Kakashi, but she was still anbu and feels wounded that her control is so shit. Mikoto is primarily Yin and Fire based, yet she spent so much time performing and emulating even low level genjustus without the sharingan, in this world.

The limitations of cursed energy and amount of cursed techniques also boggled her mind, due to the fact that there was theoretically no limitations in the amount of techniques, as it was all individualized and apparently based on inherent talent. Other than inherited techniques from jujustu clans, it was basically like everyone had their own kekkai gekkai and their own intended fate.

Talent and fate were so intertwined in this world. In the Elemental Nations if you died on the battlefield it was due to of lack of skill, not senseless notions of talent and destiny. Anyone can die. Anyone can hold a blade.

It was so strange, terrifying and thrilling all at the same time, just like these curses.

Curses and the existence of sorcerers was also mind-boggling and she felt like laughing from how ridiculous the notion of them were. They felt like stories she would tell Sasuke before bedtime. Scary monsters made from bad feelings that no one can see, and that only the big, strong shinobi could exorcise and save the day. It was so ridiculous and fantastical, but they were real. The only proof she had, that she was not going insane and that she was not in some strange form of hell, was the confirmation and reassurance from her grandfather.

Mikoto is in class, and like most of her classmates, she is waiting for the school day to end and for summer vacation to start. This time she actually is distracted and anxious about meeting her grandfather again, as the past week has been filled with the slow and steady resignation in her heart that this might be the last summer she spends with him.

She is staring straight at her textbook and is making an effort to half-listen to the on-going lecture and reminder about their summer vacation homework and exams in the Fall. She doesn’t think that she has the effort to make an excuse and play polite, for getting caught being distracted in class again. The teachers are more relaxed and also eagerly waiting for their vacation to start, no doubt needing a break from hormonal, anxious teenagers. They all don’t tend to care that much about Mikoto’s daydreaming in general, since she’s known for getting good grades and being a perfectly polite model student, who definitely doesn’t use genjutsu to skip class and breaks into rooftops to smoke.

All the teachers except one. Ever since her realization that Fuji-sensei resembles Fugaku last month, she has ceased her teasing and made an effort to actively avoid him, past their needed student-teacher interactions. Fuji-sensei has noticed and has been consistently trailing his eyes on her and occasionally sending her kicked-puppy looks that aggravate her, as much as they tug at her heart in familiarity. She wants to be cruel and laugh in his face.

Your a grown man and your mooning over your pretty high school student? How pathetic can you get?

But she won’t because Uchiha Mikoto is a modest, polite, normal teenage girl who would never make fun of her peers in such a degrading manner. She won’t because she sees the stubborn goodness that so starkly reminds her of Fugaku, and the civilian puppy love in him. She also partially feels pity because although he is an adult, she mentally is also one, and knew very well what she was doing teasing and playing games with him. Mikoto is tired and wants this monotonous day to end and like an actual teenager, never wants to return to school again.

The bell rings and Anna bounces towards her desk, and Mikoto tries to quickly pack her books and usher them out the classroom before Fuji-sensei can talk to her. She is not quick enough, because he stops her to ask, “Uchiha-chan can you stay after class for a moment. I promise it’ll be quick.” She stops and studies him for a second, before turning to Anna and giving her a polite smile before saying, “Can you wait for me?”

Anna, sweet Anna-chan, notices the awkward atmosphere and nods, “I’ll be waiting in front of the school, okay?” She keeps eye contact with Mikoto while saying this, giving her reassurance that if anything happens, she would call someone for help. Mikoto thinks it’s a little laughable that Anna is concerned over her safety with Fuji-sensei, when it should really be the other way around, but she gives her a small smile, nonetheless appreciating her quiet concern.

Once Anna leaves, Mikoto drops her smile and turns to Fuji-sensei with a neutral expression. She is annoyed but doesn’t want him to realize too soon since, he will still be her homeroom teacher for the rest of the year. The silence is prolonged and awkward within the classroom until she finally snaps, asking in a slightly bored voice, “Is there anything you need Sensei?” That seemed to snap him out of his daze, and he coughs in his fist. “I just want you to know that I hope you have a good summer vacation, Uchiha-san. And…that…once again, you can tell me if anything happens.”

It is obvious that he wants to ask her more questions, but can’t seem to find the right words or how to confront the realization that she has reduced their relationship to teacher and student, without seeming predatory. He really is a civilian with how he wears his heart on his sleeve once you get behind the blunt personality.

She thinks that if he wasn’t her teacher she would sleep with him, teenage body and hormones and all. If she hadn’t gotten to know him and interact with him on a daily basis to see how much he resembles Fugaku, she would have been amiable, it probably would have contributed to the reason why she would sleep with him. But she can’t. Despite the obvious reason and the subsequent consequences, she knows in her heart that even though it’s been fifteen years, she doesn’t know if she could handle another hesitant, gentle man calling her ‘Miko’, again.

Her heart is beginning to ache and she’s keeping Anna waiting.

So Uchiha Mikoto decides to play her part as the demure model student, and gives Fuji-sensei a distant but polite smile, before responding, “Thank you Sensei. Don’t worry I haven’t forgotten my promise.” She knows he notices how her smile does not reach her eyes, and she can see how he’s turning his head around to find a respone, but she decides to make her way out the door excusing herself first. She’s halfway down the hallway when she hears Fuji-sensei yell out, “Wait!” Mikoto rolls her eyes, turning around just to be met with a small flying object. She catches it obviously, and looks down in her palms to see, that it is a piece of strawberry candy. Mikoto pauses, staring at the candy in her hands, and bows in thanks to Fuji-sensei, “Have a good summer Sensei.”

She pockets the candy and walks to meet Anna at the front gate. Anna is talking with some of their female classmates and spots Mikoto, rushing to her and quickly trailing her eyes up and down. “What did Fuji-sensei want Mikoto-chan?”

Mikoto lightly hums and feels the piece of candy weighing in the pockets, she sewed in her skirts. She gives a small smile, settling on her response, “He noticed I was distracted a little again, so he just wanted to remind me about the summer homework.” Anna rolls her eyes and huffs, “I don’t know why he keeps reminding you Mikoto-chan. It’s not like you don’t get perfect grades, plus it’s summer. He can cut us some slack.” She lightly giggles and starts to steer the conversation away from Fuji-sensei, because frankly she’s tired about talking about school, as they begin to walk to the train station together.

Anna is a sweet girl and a nice companion, and since Kenta isn’t dropping her off at the station until tomorrow morning, Mikoto decides to indulge and hang out with her after school. They’re going to explore the city and window shop and go to a cafe. “What are you planning to do on vacation, Anna-chan?” Mikoto asks her. “Me and my brother are usually forced to help out my parents at the restaurant all summer and then visit my grandparents for a week. I swear, they had kids just for free labour.” Anna groans and she giggles back at her exasperation.

Mikoto has visited Anna’s parents restaurant before and they served ramen. The ramen was delicious and successful enough that this is there second location, her father travelling back and forth from Tokyo. She knows that Anna loves her family and can hear the familial warmth and pride in her tone, even when she is complaining about her brother or having to help out after school. The restaurant and her house emulates that warmth and pride; and the one time Mikoto stayed over for dinner after a late study session, she went out hunting until dawn, trying to rid away her grief and memories of a nostalgic ramen stand and family members bickering around the table.

They board the train station and pass through the stops quietly whispering to each other. Long distance travel is intriguing, and she’s seen the planes that frequently fly through, as Chiba held the largest and most central airport in the country; Mikoto thinks that the Land of Iron could emulate these technologies, and remembers that past the Five Great Nations, there are rumours that civilian technology is more advanced. Would shinboi cease to exist if technology became more advanced and shinobi were completely outlawed like the Meji restoration here? Would the use of chakra be illegal to use to a point where it ceases to exist and everyone was just a civilian?

From her research on politics and governance in this world, she could imagine more peacetime and the Academy raising the graduation age and being ultimately disbanded, but she couldn’t imagine chakra not being used or civilian law-makers, forcing illegal usage. The power dynamics and simple difference in strength would never allow for civilians to enforce anything on shinobi other than economical means. Even then, killing is too engrained in their way of life, and a shinobi’s first instinct against an opponent is killing, if not disable.

She has accepted that the Five Great Nations and the existence of shinobi were too intertwined. She has accepted that she really is in a completely different world.

Anna and her get off their station and continue their talks and walk around the city. For the next couple of hours, Mikoto allows herself to pretend that she is a normal teenage girl, living a normal peaceful life. With the ring tied around her neck, she can disguise her cursed energy and simply pretend, that the sorcerers roaming around the city are just strange men and women, that she’s definitely not sensing and keeping an eye on. She eats her parfait and drinks her boba tea, pretending that she can’t see the disgusting creatures leeching onto the shoulders of by-passers. City life entails an abundance of curses and sorcerers, and she’s grateful that her neighbourhood is quieter and she rarely sees any curses other than the occasional small ones, from grieving neighbours.

“Oh yeah Mikoto-chan, what do you usually do for summer?” Anna asks her, while they’re walking down the street to the train station. “I stay at my grandfather’s house all summer out in the countryside and help out with the temple.” Mikoto responds. Anna raises her eyebrow and with a shocked expression says, “All summer? And you’re grandfather runs a temple?” Mikoto nods, “I know it’s kind of weird but I don’t mind. I like the peace and quiet. Plus my cousins live in the same neighbourhood, so I have company that aren’t old people or little kids.” Anna giggles, “I guess that kinda makes sense. You’re so ojou-sama like, and mature Mikoto-chan. I always wondered where you get it from, considering you said your parents have normal jobs, but a temple makes more sense.” Anna looks sightly downcast now. “I guess we won’t be able to see each other this summer.”

She gives a sad smile, before responding, “I leave tomorrow since my grandfather’s health isn’t the best, but we can still text and I’ll send you a postcard. Before vacation ends, we can hang out again too.” Anna brightens at this and Mikoto inwardly smiles at how innocent and simple this child is. As they’re walking, Anna spots a small store and her face turns into excitement, as she grabs Mikoto’s arm. “Look! That arcade has a Purikura machine! I heard these are super cool. We totally have to take some pics before we go!” Mikoto allows herself to be dragged into the small arcade and into the photo booth. She decides to further indulge Anna and use her own money for the photos. They pose and smile and laugh in front of the flashing lights, and she lets Anna take full control over the style and decorations on the photostrips.

“They turned out great! I’m so impressed with the quality!” Anna exclaims and Mikoto smiles back. Two copies are printed out and Anna hands her one of them, and Mikoto quickly puts it in her school bag. They walk back to the train station with smiles and childish giggles, and before they split paths to their respective homes, Mikoto, feeling lighter and more carefree than she has in awhile, hands Anna the strawberry candy in her skirt pocket. Anna stares at the candy, asking, “Since when do you carry candy around?” She gives a small smirk, “Since now and because someone gave me it and I don’t feel like eating more sweets after all that sugar.” Anna snorts and shoves it in her bag saying, “Bring me back some more sweets from the temple okay? Have fun on your trip!” Mikoto giggles, “Thank you and I will. Promise.” They exchange hugs and walk home quickly, as the sun begins to fade.

That was the last time Isobe Anna ever saw Uchiha Mikoto. When Isobe Anna heard the news, she stared at the uneaten strawberry candy sitting on her desk and laughed with tears streaming down face. She whispers to the ghost of her friend and in the emptiness of her room, “You never fulfilled your promise Mikoto-chan.”

It was the Uchiha clan’s greatest secret, one that would have them rightfully feared and policed from the council and excluded from the village even more than they already were, that Madara’s line still continued till this day.

Before he was struck down by Senju Tobirama, Uchiha Izuna fathered a daughter. Madara was a known eternal bachelor and according to the elders of the clan, he was so against the idea of marriage that his brother was made to take his place. Madara was blunt and staunch and unyielding. It was his greatest strength and led to his and the clan’s downfall.

Due to age and the inevitable subjugation from the Senju if found out, the elders reconvened and Uchiha Kyoka decided to give up her place as heir and pass it to Hikaku. She instead took the position as High Priestess tasked with taking care of the relics and scrolls of the Naka Shrine and performing religious ceremonies with the other shrine maidens and priests.

Fugaku came from Hikaku’s line, while she came from Izuna’s. Out of respect for blood and position of keeper of the Naka Shrine, her family was still held in high honour even though Fugaku was in line for clan head. Her younger brother Isamu used to whisper to her, that it was Fugaku who was marrying up and that the rigid, pure heir should be the one wearing the white kimono not her. “He probably thinks missionary position is the only way to have sex. Let’s hope you give him an heir quickly nee-san, so you don’t have to share his futon so much” Isamu giggled in her ear. Mikoto rolled her eyes and shoved his shoulder, telling him that Fugaku is a shinobi, there is not such thing as purity in their world and to watch his uncouth mouth. She did not deny his remarks about sex though, Fugaku was known for having a stick up his ass even amongst the most standoffish, Uchiha clan members.

But when she was sharing a futon with Kushina, and laying her head against her chest while brushing her fingers through that bright red, undeniably, Uzumaki hair, she thought about how different life could have been had she been born a man.

I would make a better clan head than Fugaku.

I’m in Anbu. I could fight him for the position and easily win especially since I have the lineage to prove it.

I am proof that Madara’s blood reigns strong.

Nobody could tell me what to do anymore if I’m clan head.

I could propose to Kushina and we could get married and be happy together.

It was the thoughts and rage of a naive teenage girl.

She was seventeen and filled with relentless rage when she learned she was to marry Fugaku in the following Autumn. Her mother and the clan elders gathered her into a room to sit her down and inform her. It was an honour to be married to the clan head. It was an honour to give birth to the clan heir. It is your duty to the clan. Madara’s line will continue. War is coming and we need a successor. All their words and meaningless congratulations were for nothing because Mikoto could not hear them due to the blood and anger rushing through her mind.

But what about her? I’m in love with someone else. What about her anbu career? She doesn’t even want children. What about Kushina? I’m a shinobi I need to train for war not sit around nursing a child. What does Fugaku think about this? I don’t want to. I barely know him. What about my honour? Please, please don’t make me.

She didn’t even hate Fugaku nor disliked him, she simply did not know him other than a few sparse conversations during clan celebrations and coming back from missions. All she really knew about him was that, he was the soon-to-be clan head, a talented jounin and kinda rigid. But in that moment, when it was announced that they were to be married, she hated him with a passion of a thousand suns. Mikoto later learned that Fugaku was also not completely amiable to their engagement but did his duty for the clan, and sometimes, she still chastises her past self for the bitterness and resentment she showed towards him. It was still, one of her many regrets that haunted her into this new world.

I spent so many years resenting him while he stood waiting for my simple friendship. I spent so many years yearning after Kushina and what we could have had when she clearly moved on. I spent so many years being cold and distant when we could have been properly raising Itachi together.

In the olden days there were hidden passages scattered all throughout the south of Fire Country, that the Uzumaki used to use for transportation routes and when Uzushiogakure fell during the Second Shinobi War, they were used to transport refugees. The Land of Whirlpools was a small island filled with sealing masters and shinobi with endless chakra reserves, while the women had the great possibility of inheriting chakra chains, strong enough to hold down a tailed beast. It was inevitable that they would be attacked, whether it was from mainlanders or the Land of Waters. Later on, people would taunt to Kushina’s face and whisper behind her back that her homeland deserved to be destroyed and that the Uzumaki were too powerful to let live. Power will always create equal amounts of respect as it does fear. Uzumaki Mito’s marriage to Senju Hashirama was a political alliance, no matter how much it later grew into love. She would have had to marry him regardless, because it was her duty as Princess to protect her home.

In her most naive thoughts, Mikoto would stand against the shores of Wave country, and imagine using those passages to run away with Kushina. Kushina sparked something in her heart that she never felt before, and maybe it really was fate for the Kyuubi to become entwined with an Uchiha once again. They were best friends in the Academy and later turned more than friends, when they were placed on the same genin team as Hyuuga Hitomi. Despite the perceived rivalry between their clans, she did grow to like and respect Hitomi, but she never felt the same companionship and fire that she felt whenever she was with Kushina.

Mikoto remembered how they would lay at night watching the stars together in an empty field, quietly confessing to each other how out of place they felt in Konoha, their supposed home. Kushina would talk about she missed the sunsets and the smell of the sea in Uzushiogakure; and how she wanted to be Hokage, simply so, people wouldn’t make fun of her accent anymore and would be forced to accept her. Mikoto would whisper back how she thinks Madara would forever haunt her clan even though his name has been crossed out of their history textbooks, and how she is afraid of giving up her life for a village that would never accept her and just see her as another Sharingan wielder.

She is giving up her life for a village that hates her. She does not want to come back as a body with missing eyes.

If their hands slowing made their way into each others, and Mikoto’s sharingan turned on as she looked into Kushina’s stunning, violet eyes, it was only between the two of them.

Radiohead’s ‘Creep’ is playing through her headphones, as MIkoto looks around the train station and spots her uncle. Uchiha Koutarou is a handsome man in his fourties, and Mikoto is always surprised at how much her father’s family resembles her old clan. Her father and uncle and cousins look like Uchiha with their pale skin, quiet and alluring quality, and black hair and eyes. It was to a point, that if someone told them they were her cousins in the Elemental Nations, she would believe them. It wasn’t just the name that followed her, but the physical manifestations of ghosts, that she interacts with every summer.

She remembered being six years old and still experiencing her all encapsulating grief, that she turned the sharingan on her father and cousins, hoping that she would see the familiar colour or spot a tomoe, really anything that could give her some familiarity in this strange world. She did not, and was forced to use genjutsu to make them forget her spinning red eyes. Mikoto remembered crying after every disappointment.

Uncle Kou is a quiet but serene man. He is dressed in regular clothes, jeans and a shirt, rather than his usual priest robes. He has always been kind and welcoming to her, but she knows that he is constantly wondering why she is so favoured by her grandfather, compared to his own children. Mikoto knows that her father and Uncle Kou have a strained relationship, a mix of resentment and love, the type you can only feel towards an older sibling who raised you. After her grandmother died and grandfather being emotionally and probably physically unavailable, it left Uncle Kou to be her father’s main source for parental affection and support.

She can recognize how Uncle Kou treats her father with well-pointed comments and “jokes”, like he is the bane of his existence and the one he loves the most in the room, someone he loves so much he gave up his childhood for. The envy and resentment finally took over in their relationship especially with Kenta going to the city for school and not coming back, while Koutarou is set to inherit the temple. The funny thing is, she doesn’t even think that Uncle Kou is necessarily angry that Kenta got to leave and live his dreams, she simply thinks that he is angry for leaving him alone with their father. A warped lonely anger that can only come from a parent resenting their child for leaving.

Distance and children healed most of the resentment, but she worries that her favourability with her grandfather resurfaces these childhood rivalry. She doesn’t think that it’s actually been brought up and they are both fortunate that Mikoto likes her cousins, and her cousins don’t really care that she spends a lot of time with their grandfather either.

“Hello Mikoto-chan. Let me grabs your bags, the car isn’t too far away.” Uncle Kou gives her a quick one-sided hug, and she hands him her suitcase, tucking her cassette player in her backpack before handing it off to him as well. “Hi Kou-ojisan. Thank you for picking me up” she says, giving a polite smile, as they make their way through the parking lot and towards the car. “It’s no problem Mikoto-chan. How was the train ride?” he asks while looking into the mirror to back the car out of the parking lot. “It was good. No delays and my row was surprisingly empty so I had room to stretch my legs.” He chuckles and they begin to meet the highway.

“Haruka is excited to see you again. She kept asking me when you’re coming all week, that girl. Kenji is in charge of setting up the temple for the festival with me this year, so he’ll be busy but I’m sure you’ll see him around too.” Mikoto giggles at her cousin’s antics. Haruka is older than her by two years, and Kenji by four. She’s closer to Haruka due to age and by being a girl and they tend to spend the most time together, painting and rollerblading and talking about the city. With Kenji he is more distant, but they surprisingly share similar hobbies including the same taste for Western music and literature as her and her father, so they share books and talk about bands together. Her father was ecstatic that he now has two kids that have a passion for music, and usually goes out of his way to send Kenji limited edition records for his birthday.

They are children to her, and maybe it is because of the aching familiarity to the Uchiha clan with the physical attributes and last name and the setting of the fresh air and nature, as opposed to the skyscrapers and bustling streets of the city, but she finds herself being more relaxed and open with her cousins than the people at school or at home. As she stares out the window of the car into the vast rice fields and blue sky and houses that get further and further apart, listening to a low song on the radio, she can close her eyes and almost imagine that she is back in Konoha.

After an hour drive and small talk, the car stops and Mikoto looks at the large house in front of her. She gets out of the car and helps Kou-ojisan with her bags, and they open the sliding doors of the house and make their way into the house. The house is large and in traditional Japanese style and her eyes burn when she enters the sitting room only to be faced with the Uchiha mon. Her cousin Haruka and aunt Honoka are there eating oranges and watching the television, and she looks up to see Mikoto. “Miko-chan! You’re here!” Haruka exclaims, before running up to Mikoto for a hug.

“Nee-san you’re home!” “Mommy you’re home!” “Mikoto you’re home.” “Mother you’re home.”

The voices are so vivid and she closes her eyes as she gives Haruka an enthusiastic hug back, burying her face in her shoulder. She smells like sweet flowers and sage and oranges, not wood and fire. Haruka is slightly taller and more curvy than her, with short wavy black hair and downturned, wide dark eyes. What she lacks in cursed energy, she makes up for, in her enthusiastic, blunt personality and ears for gossip. Mikoto retracts her hug and gives Haruka a genuine smile, as she gazes into her dark, Uchiha eyes. “I heard that you were waiting for me” Haruka giggles and huffs her chest, “Of course I have. It’s summer and now that you’re around I don’t have to hang out with old men all the time at the temple.”

“Haruka!” Her aunt Honoka exclaims narrowing her eyes at her daughter, before softening them as she gazes at Mikoto. “Hello Mikoto-chan. My, you’ve gotten so beautiful. Come sit, I’ll go peel more oranges.” Mikoto gives her aunt her greetings and a bow, before taking her place on the couch.

“I have my gifts in my backpack. I’ll give them after dinner.” Mikoto says and Haruka’s expression brightens even more. “I have sooo much to tell you, Miko-chan” Haruka says excitedly. Mikoto raises an eyebrow, “Like what?” and Haruka is about to respond when a voice cuts through, “Like her new annoying ass crush on Okkotsu-kun.”

Uchiha Kenji is a tall, handsome young man with wavy dark hair and sharp eyes and an even sharper tongue, which is ironic considering he is set to inherit the temple after Kou-ojisan, as head priest. Her nineteen year old cousin, is leaning against the tatami door with a mischievous smile on his lips. He reminds her of Shisui. Mikoto can’t help but laugh, as Haruka begins to scream and berate her older brother for ruining her announcement and school life gossip session.

“Kenji you’re actually the worst!” Haruka yells. Kenji rolls his eyes and says in a mocking tone, “It’s literally all you talk about. ‘Okkotsu-kun is so cute’ and ‘Okkotsu-kun is so shy and smart’ and ‘I want to marry and have ten babies with Okkotsu-kun’.” Haruka stands and runs to tackle her brother, but Kenji sticks his hand out and puts his entire hand on her face. It creates a comical view, as Haruka’s battering arms are too short to reach Kenji, and he is simply keeping her at arms length by shoving his hand in her face. Kenji looks up at Mikoto and exasperated at his sister says, “Hey Miko-chan. Me and dad put your bags in your room for you. Did you bring me anything?”

Honoka-obasan walks in with a tray of sliced oranges and tea and yells, “Your cousin just got here and you’re already acting like this! Kenji get your hand off your sister! And Haruka stop fighting I can see your face turning purple!” Both siblings back away from each other, with the slow pace of two cats waiting to see if the other will strike first. Honoka-obasan sets the tray down and Mikoto can only giggle, as the two siblings take their respective seats on the opposite sides of the room. “I have some cds in my backpack Kenji. My parents also sent some gifts for you and Oji-sama, Auntie, as a thank you for letting me stay for the summer.”

Honoka-obasan waves her hand and says, “Nonsense Mikoto-chan. You’re an Uchiha this is your home too, but I appreciate the gift.” She turns to Kenji and scolds, “You are to be a priest. You ask your cousin for gifts and not about how her trip was first? Shouldn’t you be with your father preparing for the festival?” Haruka snorts while picking up an orange slice, “Yeah Kenji, aren’t you supposed to not find peace from material things? Hm?” Kenji rolls his eyes and snatches an orange slice from the plate, “Kami-sama would understand, that the only way I can achieve inner peace is by listening to Nirvana and grant mercy on his loyal subject, that has to be tortured by your yapping everyday. And dad’s at the shrine. He told me to go greet Miko-chan, okaa-san.”

Haruka growls and Oba-san turns to slap her on the head, while rolling her eyes at her nearly grown children fighting. She turns to Mikoto and asks, “You must be tired from the train ride, Mikoto-chan. It’s only about half-past ten in the morning. Do you want to take a nap and then I can wake you up for lunch? It’ll be a late one, since I have to go to the markets today.” Mikoto feels herself smiling and nods, saying “I had a big breakfast Oba-san, so I’m okay with a late lunch. I think I’m going to greet Oji-sama first and then take a nap.” The atmosphere grows sad at the mention of grandfather, and even cheerful Haruka and sharp-tongued Kenji turn quiet, as Oba-san gives a polite nod, “He’s in the east wing.”

Mikoto turns to Haruka and asks, “Want to go rollerblading after lunch?” Haruka’s eyes light up as she nods rapidly. “We have to finish our gossip session and everything I have to tell you, before Kenji rudely interrupted.” She turns and glares at him, and Kenji sticks his tongue out at her. Mikoto giggles and begins to walk to the guest room, to get her backpack with the sake for Oji-sama and unpack her things. She’s been here enough that the guest room is practically her own room, and she remembers Haruka telling her that, even when they have actual guests over they’re always redirected to the other rooms. Mikoto cannot help but marvel at the large wooden house with the occasional scrolls and pictures hanging in the hallways, and ignores the aching pang in her chest that happens whenever she visits. Everything is so similar but so different. The gods are cruel for taking her away from home just to be placed in a replica of it.

She finds her room and quickly unpacks her suitcase and toiletries for the summer. She takes out the gifts she brought for her family and lays them neatly on the desk. There is mochi and sweets for her aunt and uncle, cds and a book for Kenji, a nice dress and hairpins she found for Haruka, and expensive sake for her grandfather. Mikoto grabs the bottle of sake and makes her way down the hall into the eastern wing of the house, to find her grandfather.

She can sense his cursed energy easily in the house, and lightly knocks on the tatami doors of the room, waiting to be granted entry. “Enter” a stern and raspy voice responds. Mikoto walks into the room and finds her grandfather, Uchiha Kentarou, sitting seiza at a low table and drawing kanji characters on a scroll with an ink brush. The room is small but with the door leading to a small veranda opened, it feels airy and refreshing. Mikoto walks next to her grandfather and sets the sake to the side, before sitting seiza and bowing her head to the floor, “This granddaughter greets her grandfather.”

Kentarou-ojisama lifts his head from the table and says, “Rise Mikoto.” She rises her head and he motions to the opposite side of the table, telling her to join him. She grabs the sake, putting them to the side of the table, next to the tray with a teapot and cups prepared. She sees the scattered paper on the table, all with different characters of “good fortune” and “rebirth” and probably more in the growing pile. Mikoto grabs a sheet of paper and an ink brush and begins writing characters. They write in silence for a few minutes, only the sounds of ink brushing paper fill the room, before Mikoto says, “I brought a gift Oji-sama. Thank you for allowing me to stay over for the summer.”

Grandfather continues to write as he responses in a low voice, “Are you sure it’s not a final farewell gift? Considering Koutarou has been telling everyone with ears about my impending death.”

Mikoto feels her lip twitch upwards, “If that’s what it takes for you to accept, then sure. It would be a shame to waste good sake.” Grandfather looks up and stares at the bottle, before gathering the piles of paper and placing them on the floor, and moving the ink and brushes to the side of the table. He huffs and says, “It would be a damn waste. Hand me a cup child.” She smiles and sets out the cups from the tea tray and begins to pour some for her grandfather and then herself. She watches him take a sip and humming lowly in approval, as he closes his eyes and listens to the gentle breeze and sounds of the wind chimes outside. “Kenta has good taste” She smirks into her cup, “Otou-san does.”

“When is he coming?” She raises an eyebrow, and says, “In a couple of weeks. He’ll be here before the festival. Chiyo will probably stay home but send more gifts as an apology.” He sips his cup, saying “I have pity and mercy for your mother but Kenta is a fool.” Despite the harsh response, she can hear genuine affection in his gruff voice and she says, “He’s worried for you Oji-sama.” He rolls his eyes and before he begins to rant about her father, Mikoto sets her cup down and asks, seriously but gently, “How are you? Truly grandfather.”

Uchiha Kentarou looks up and stares at her eyes for a second, before slowly responding in a quiet tone, “This will be my last fire festival.” He turns away to look out the veranda into the blue sky and continues, “Put those sad eyes away child. Everything I am prepared to do has been done. I have lived out my life and am an old man. I am ready.” Mikoto turns off her Sharingan and gives a sad hum and looks down at her cup, “It’s funny how the human heart works though. I am missing you already and yet you’re still here.” Grandfather is the only one who knows about the sharingan and the only one she told about her sensing capabilities, especially in regards to cursed energy. He turns back to stare at her, stern onyx eyes meeting sad wide onyx eyes. “There is no point, especially with your eyes and our blood, I will live on forever.” She gives him a small smile responding, “Especially with my eyes, I think I will miss you forever.”

“Mikoto. You will not need to. I will be at peace with the gods and with Himiko. But…this grandfather appreciates his granddaughter’s sentiment.” She hears the unspoken words of I will miss you too in his stern words, and the grandfather and granddaughter duo continue to quietly sip their sake, listening to the wind chimes that the breeze carries into the room. Mikoto does not bother to lecture him about staying in a hospital to treat his tumours, she already knows that her aunt and uncle and father, have tried relentlessly. The old man is stubborn to pass away at his own time and home, not in a sterile hospital; only allowing a family friend from the neighbourhood who is a nurse, to visit him every week for check ups. She respects it as much as it makes her sad.

“How are your hunts?” He asks. She does not bother to lie to him, but she does decide to play coy, simply for the opportunity to banter with the old man. “What do you mean Oji-sama?” He glares at her in response, “I’m sick not brain dead. I can smell the blood and distinct smell of curses on you. Now stop playing fool and tell me.” She can’t help but have her eye twitch in exasperation, because the old man really is sharp. “They have been well. I have not encountered a special grade yet, and have been avoiding sorcerers, just as you’ve told me to.”

He nods. “Good. You are my heir, do not forget what jujustu society have done to our clan Mikoto. Despite how those old fools despise curses, they have no problem emulating them.” Mikoto feels rage and grief in her body, as she is reminded about jujustu society and how the elders council dictates and rules over sorcerers, even as her mind sings at being reminded that she is his heir. It was all too similar to the Uchiha clan and the village in the Elemental Nations, that it feels like the gods truly were playing one big joke on her.

Mikoto remembers sitting with Uchiha Kentarou at six year old, watching him perform his cursed technique with bright, red eyes. The flames were large and beautiful as they came to life in the palm of his hands. The bright orange flames was the only light in the dark room, in the far east wing of the house, as Oji-sama put his hands together and made hand signs, and slowly but surely, a large katana brimming with cursed energy was forged from the fiery heat and palms of his hands. Oji-sama held the sword in his hands and handed it to her to inspect, and with the sharingan, she could spout how flawless and carefully crafted it was. How the handle was rough and well protected. And how the cursed energy was embedded and flowed throughout each sheet of metal, like the sword was alive.

“You can feel it, can’t you child? How the sword seems to have its own soul?” She looks up from her inspection and nods carefully. Oji-sama takes a deep breathe and says, “The Uchiha are craftsman and artisans Mikoto. We are strong. Our flames and cursed technique can create tools that embody our design and our soul or the soul of the wielder.” Mikoto takes a sharp breathe at this, ignoring the nostalgia and harrowing grief stabbing her chest, and tries to concentrate on Oji-sama’s words. “ ‘Our soul or the soul of the wielder’. Do you mean…” Oji-sama nods and his eyes are downcast and he looks so, so old in that minute, before he confirms her thoughts. “Yes. We can create tools embedded with cursed techniques. Our most talented ancestor from before the Heian period, broke the balance of jujustu world by creating the now lost, ‘Inverted Spear of Heaven’. Since then, we have been targeted until our almost complete erasure.”

Mikoto feels her heart race and uses her six year old body, to childishly ask, “What does the Inverted Spear of Heaven do? Why are we so hunted?” Oji-sama’s eyes sharpen and she can see his hands tremble from fear and from creating the sword. Oji-sama had sorcerer level reserves, but it still didn’t seem as large as hers, so the technique must be consuming, “It is a stunning and truly cursed blade, capable of nullifying any cursed technique. In the scrolls written by my grandfather, he wrote how he has only encountered it once. But he could feel the soul within it and how it almost completely killed our ancestor to create it. The world requires balance. It was out pure desperation and madness that, he almost used his entire soul to create that cursed blade. Blood recognizes blood Mikoto. You will always be able to know if an Uchiha created a cursed tool. Our craftsmanship reflects our hearts too much.”

Mikoto feels the ring that her grandfather personally crafted for her, the one that completely disguises her cursed energy reserves to civilian levels, run heavy and hot around her neck. Uchiha are pure fire in body, mind and soul. Fire is warmth and love and passion, it is the feeling of coming home to a hot, fresh meal on the dining room table. Fire is craftsmanship and art, it is the weeks and months spent in the forges crafting and hand tinkering a blade of specific purpose and shape and length, meant for the individual user. Fire is rage and heat, it is the sensation of being burnt and the all-encompassing despair and heat.

Mikoto is an Uchiha. Uchiwa is their clan signal, an unfolding handheld fan signalling that they fan the flames and embrace all the paths that encompass fire. Mikoto is an Uchiha and she will fan the flames in her soul no matter what life she lives.

Summer passes by quickly, so quickly it feels like it’s almost over in a blink of an eye, as the summer festival comes closer and closer, and the subsequent reminder that she will be leaving after it, follows. Mikoto spends her summer days with her family doing aimless, regular teenage girl things and her heart feels full and alive. Everyday is the same but slightly different. She helps Kenji and Kou-ojisan with cleaning and changing out the incense for the temple. She shows Grandfather how she’s mastered her technique and silently drawing calligraphy together. She picks up souvenirs for Anna-chan and texts her once a week about the quietness and serenity of the countryside. She goes to the market with her aunt and peels fruit while watching dramas on the couch with her.

Her favourite days are when she can rollerblade with Haruka through town, feeling the breeze through her hair, as they race and spin around each other through the neighbourhood. Haruka finally told Mikoto, all about her school life gossip and love life surrounding Okkotsu-kun, and she remembers the first time she met him.

They were rollerblading down the street into the convenience store to stock up on snacks and ice cream for the movie night they were planning. Mikoto enjoys rollerblading, despite how simple and how she could definitely run faster; she likes how free her arms feel and enjoys the amount of grace and balance needed for the activity, similarly like ice skating. Haruka and her decided to sit outside on the curb to enjoy their popsicles before they melt, when she hears a boy-ish voice cut through. “Uchiha-chan! Is that you?”

They both look up to see a teenage boy with, dark blue round eyes and spiky, brown hair. Haruka immediately stands up, and immediately wobbles, forgetting that she’s wearing rollerskates as her arms flail outwards rapidly to keep balance and not have her face plant in front of the boy. The boy quickly runs over and puts his hands on her arms, preventing Haruka from falling, but the embarrassment is already in the air, as Haruka’s face turns red. She can finally balance herself and the boy takes a step back, and Haruka gives a quick bow, her eyes downcast, “Okkotsu-kun! Th-Thank you.” Oh. This is Okkotsu Yamato.

He’s cute in a teenage boy way, and Mikoto watches as he nervously brushes the back of his head and waves off her cousin’s gratitude while smiling. Mikoto thinks that she’s watching a romance drama, as she sees how the two teenagers are talking and smiling, completely in their own world while she silently licks popsicle. Okkotsu-kun clearly likes Haruka too and she’s grateful and happy that her cousin can experience a mutual love. She makes eye contact with him, and he blushes, finally breaking the small world he was in with her cousin and realizing that they are in public.

“Oh. Hello, I’m sorry if I interrupted anything. I’m Okkotsu Yamato.” Mikoto stares at him and gives a smile back, as she stands to give a polite bow. “I’m Uchiha Mikoto. I’m Haruka’s cousin. It’s nice to meet the friend, my cousin has been telling me so much about.” She sees from the corner of her eye, Haruka’s eyes widening and her ears turning red, and Mikoto cannot help the mischievous smirk she wears. Okkotsu-kun blushes and nervously laughs, “Uchiha-chan talks about me a lot?” Mikoto’s grin widens and before she can say anything, Haruka interrupts, “Only, like a normal amount that friends talk about each other! Anyways this is my little cousin, I was talking to you about. The one that visits for the summer every year.” Okkotsu-kun’s eyes slightly dim at Haruka’s emphasis of the word “friends” and Mikoto lets out a small giggle, at how this boy blatantly wears his heart on his sleeve.

“Did you need something Okkotsu-kun? Or did you just want to stop for a chat?” Haruka asks. Okkotsu-kun blushes and coughs as his eyes wander from Haruka to Mikoto. He wants to ask her something but realizes that she’s with company. Mikoto decides to grant mercy on the boy and inwardly rolls her eyes, “Haru-chan, I think the ice cream is melting. I’ll meet you back at the house, okay?” Haruka looks like she’s going to protest, but Mikoto grabs the bags and rolls away, before winking at Okkotsu-kun. He sees it and his mouth drops open and she begins to giggle again, as she closes her eyes and feels the wind brush through her hair.

It is finally the night of the summer festival and she is looks into the full body mirror of Haruka’s bedroom. She is donned in a red yukata embroidered with gold flowers and dragons, with the Uchiha mon stitched on the back and a gold obi tied into a bow, around her waist. Her hair is in a simple half-updo pinned with a glass hair stick that Honoka-obasan put in her for. Mikoto turns to the side and sees Haruka looking, with a detached expression on her face, at her aunt. “Haruka you look so beautiful! I can’t believe all it took was a boy to make you clean up nicely and not your own mother” Honoka-obasan exclaims, as she takes out a camera out of thin air, and begins fretting around the girls, in order to captures pictures at every angle. Haruka does look beautiful, with her wavy hair in an updo, navy yukata with white flowers embroidered, and red obi tied that emphasize the curves in her body. Mikoto giggles as Haruka begins to scowl, “Mom! Stop embarrassing me!”

Kenji and Kou-ojisan pop into the doorframe of the room and laugh. “Haruka, let your mother have fun. It’s not everyday you’re so dressed up. You look beautiful daughter. You too, Mikoto-chan.” Haruka flushes with embarrassment and quietly looks down, “Thank you dad.” Kenji stares at his sister and raises an eyebrow, “Should I have some words with Okkotsu-kun imouto? That little brat should know better than to try anything with a priest’s daughter.” Kou-ojisan slaps Kenji on the back of his head, and Haruka’s face flushes with embarrassment and anger now. “Don’t you dare Kenji!” Honoka-obasan glares at her son, “Kenji you’re a future priest. Don’t go threatening kids!”

Mikoto laughs as Kenji rolls his eyes at the amount of scowls faced his way. She hears Kou-ojisan mutter under his breathe, “If the brat deserves it, I think Kami-sama will look the other way”. Mikoto turns to Haruka and grabs her arm to make their way out of the now, crowded room, “Come on Haru-chan. You wouldn’t want to keep Okkotsu-kun waiting after all.” Haruka storms out of the room and through the house, and they hear Kenji yell, “We’ll meet you at the shrine. You and Okkotsu-kun better be at the very front!”

Haruka walks faster out of the house and Mikoto can’t help but smile, as she sees Haruka’s scowl wither away to an expression of exasperation and warmth, at her family teasing her. She turns to Mikoto with a nervous expression, “Are you sure you’re okay with me going to the festival with Okkotsu-kun? I feel bad leaving you alone and I’m sure he won’t mind you tagging along, he’s super nice like that.” Mikoto gives her cousin a genuine smile. “I don’t mind, I’ll be with my dad.” Haruka’s mouth thins at her statement, “You’re not making me feel better about this.” Mikoto shoves her shoulder playfully, “Trust me I’ll have fun. And being with my dad will be ten times better, than watching you and Okkotsu-kun overthink if you should kiss or not.” Her face flushes and she says quietly, looking down, “Do you really think he’ll kiss me tonight?” Ah, young civilian love. Haruka is an Uchiha and she does not look good insecure.

"I think when he sees how good your breasts look, he’ll want to do more than kiss you tonight” Mikoto’s smirk widens as Haruka’s flushed face shoots up and yells, “Miko! You can’t say that!” She laughs out loud because despite how brash Haruka is, she is still a teenage girl in a conservative society, who cringes when talking about sex out loud. It’s so different from her own siblings who talk and joke about sex at the dining table. It’s dumb to hold sex and the concept of virginity to any degree of importance when murder is their jobs.

“Okkotsu-kun likes you Haru-chan, trust me. You’re an Uchiha, so hold your head high, because he’s going to trip over his own feet when he sees how beautiful you look.” Mikoto says in a stern but kind way, and it clearly works because Haruka’s back straightens and her face brightens, especially when she sees Okkotsu-kun standing at the end of the street. He immediately notices her, and even without the sharingan, Mikoto can see how his eyes widen and his mouth drops open when he lays his eyes on Haruka. Haruka tries to casually speed up to meet him and Mikoto decides to quietly slip away to the other end of street, towards the temple, allowing the couple to have their own time. She pushes some cursed energy into her ears, only to hear teenage nervous coughs and, “You look beautiful Uchiha-chan. I mean-you always look beautiful, but-” and Mikoto smiles, knowing that her cousin is in good hands.

The temple is on the smaller side, but no less stunning with the lanterns lit with flames and sheets of paper with the characters of “good fortune” and “rebirth” and “protection”, strung along with rope against the entrance. It was like the entrance of the torii towards the Naka Shrine. The stone pathway is slightly crowded with people being guided towards the inside by the stone statues of buddha and animals surrounded by the green shrubbery. Mikoto makes it inside the wooden temple with half gridded walls; and spots her grandfather, uncle, cousin and father at the centre and kneeling on cushions, and in front of the ornate shrine of buddha surrounded by lighted incense.

She makes it to the front and bows, smiling at her family and sliding next to her aunt in the front row. Mikoto makes eye contact with her father, and even without her sensing his cursed energy, can tell that he is sad, but is putting on a brave face for the ceremony and prayers. Kenta has not participated in the guiding prayers since he left home and moved, and this will be the first and last time he does. He arrived a couple of days ago, without Chiyo, and has spent the majority of his time talking to his father and probably saying his farewells, so tonight will be the first time they will actually spend time together. She doesn’t mind and is instead glad that her father can have closure on his rocky relationship with his father, but she is disappointed that Chiyo is not here. Not because she actually wants to spend time with her, but out of respect for her dying grandfather.

She spots Haruka and Okkotsu-kun in the far right of the crowd- right in the front row- and makes eye contact with her aunt and Kenji, who have also spotted the couple. Despite Kenji trying his best to keep a neutral and serious face of a priest-in training, she can see his mouth twitch upwards and the mischief in his eyes, and she has to cover her smile with the sleeve of her yukata. The room is crowded now and Kou-ojisan stands, and the talks and whispers die down to a silence. Her grandfather stands with a tremble in his legs and speaks with a low, raspy voice, as the opening ceremony of the festival and the prayers that follow begin. Mikoto only follows the Uchiha gods of Amaterasu, Izanagi, Izanami, Tsukuyomi, and Susanoo, but when she closes her eyes and revels in the powerful voice of her grandfather saying prayers, and thinks about the men of her family kneeling before her, she allows herself to believe and find comfort in the gods.

Thank you Amaterasu for giving me a new life. I miss Sasuke and the clan so much, but I’m grateful that I was able to be an Uchiha again. Please guide my grandfather into the Pure Lands safely. Please protect my new clan. I carry your flames and blessings with me everywhere I go.

It is 1992 and the festival feels like a dream as Mikoto walks and talks with her father in a carefree way that she knows, they have both not been able to do in awhile. With his nights away from the sterile house, and the fresh countryside air and joyous laughter in the crowds, Uchiha Kenta and Uchiha Mikoto are able to have a conversation as father and daughter. Mikoto talks about the album, ‘Wish’, that just got released from The Cure and how her and Kenji love it, for it’s emotional range of melancholic tones and casual pop influences. Her father’s smile widens as she brings up a topic, he could talk for hours abou,t and they debate whether it’s better than the band’s, ‘Disintegration’ album. Kenta talks about his love for UK rock bands and how much the ‘Sex Pistols’ influenced him as a teenager to branch out into Western artists, and how he’s currently trying to find more American rappers and hip-hop artists due to the meaningful poetry and catchy beats behind it.

They spend the night eating spicy, beef teriyaki skewers and fluffy dorayaki from the street vendors surrounding them. Mikoto buys pretty keychains for Anna and Haruka while Kenta plays a shooting game, surprisingly winning a pack of baseball cards for his coworker, Yashiro-san. The fireworks are set off and Mikoto can’t help but flash her sharingan, memorizing the scene of the colourful lights explode in the sky, and her father smiling and waving over Haruka and Okkotsu-kun, who are holding hands, as they walk together.

The night is perfect and Mikoto keeps its close to her heart.

Uchiha Kentarou at age eighty-seven, dies in his sleep, the day after the festival. He dies at peace and with a gentle expression on his face. His family notices almost immediately, when he did not come to start morning prayers, nor make tea for himself. Mikoto is sad and knows everyone else in the house is too, because despite the preparations and final goodbyes and conversations and knowledge of his failing health, nothing can truly prepare someone for the death of a loved one. The funeral is a quiet but crowded affair because Uchiha Kentarou while having a brash personality and low tolerance for foolishness, was a pillar to community, as a priest and as a person.

Kou-ojisan leads the ceremony and prayers, while Kenji and her father are at the front of the funeral procession greeting family friends and other people from the neighbourhood. Following traditional practices, there in an open casket for the funeral with a picture of her grandfather and Buddha on the shrine, allowing for family and friends to mourn pray. The body is then transported to be cremated and afterwards they will head to the cemetery, near the temple, and lay his ashes next to his gravestone. Despite the differences in this world, Mikoto is comforted by these funeral rites and how common they are. It is right for her grandfather to be cremated, he is an Uchiha, his body must be burned to release his spirit into the Pure Lands. Fire is the only way to cleanse the soul and ensure that there is nothing left to be taken by someone who cannot fight back.

Mikoto bows her head at the casket and lights incense, before praying to Amaterasu to guide her grandfather to her grandmother. She thanks her grandfather for all his lessons and stories about the Uchiha and jujustu, and promises in heart that she will make a good heir that brings honour to their clan and their craftsmanship.

I will not shame you grandfather. I will make you proud. Every blade I produce will remember your soul.

Nobody talks about how Chiyo is not there. She knows Kenta called her to inform her about his father’s death, only to be met with minor condolences and silence on the other side of the line. She also knows that Kou-ojisan and Honoka-obasan finally know about what happened between Chiyo and Kenta since, Kenta bursted into tears when asked about if Chiyo would attend or not, the previous night. Haruka is too sad and hasn’t really noticed that Chiyo is not there, since she was never close with her aunt. Kenji notices but decided to keep his mouth shut, when he met the blank eyes of Mikoto, and the resigned, sad air that Kenta has whenever she is brought up.

Summer is truly over. Mikoto and her father leave the day after the funeral and are met with tight hugs and bags of food and snacks for the train ride back home. Mikoto promises to call Haruka about her relationship milestones on Okkotsu-kun and tells Kenji, she’ll send more cds for his birthday. Honoka-obasan kisses her forehead and reminds her and her father to eat more and to take care of each other.

Uncle Kou drives them to the train station in silence and Mikoto’s sharingan quickly flares, as she says a silent goodbye to her grandfather and her summer with her family. As they take their luggage from the trunk, Kou-ojisan gives her father a tight hug and whispers something in his ear, before placing their foreheads together. Kenta is stunned but quickly accepts the hug and affection from the older brother, he used to be unable to be in the same room as. Mikoto gets another hug from her uncle and they bid their final goodbyes, as the father-daughter duo board the train. Kenta is staring out the window as the train begins to leave, and she taps his shoulder, holding out an earbud from her cassette player. He gives her a small, gentle smile and puts in the earbud as the lyrics of Fleetwood Mac’s ‘Dreams’ fill their ears, and Mikoto closes her eyes and rests her head on the shoulder of her father.

She senses it from kilometeres away, and she can feel it, as they get closer and closer to the house. There is a curse in the neighbourhood. A strong one and her heart begins to race, when the taxi turns into their street and stops in front of the house. Her father is getting out of the car and collecting the luggage from the trunk, when he notices that she is glued to her seat and not moving, only staring at the house. Uchiha Kenta sighs and looks down in shame that his lovely teenage daughter, is afraid of entering their house. He gives Mikoto a gentle shake on the shoulder, “Come on Mikoto-chan. I know. It’s hard but…we have to go home eventually.”

She grabs his arm and shakes her head, quietly saying, “Dad. We can’t” Her father gives her a sad smile, “We have to. But… I think after this summer, there might be some needed changes in our family.” Mikoto thinks in the back of her head, are they finally getting a divorce? before shaking her head again, at the wave of powerful cursed energy that hits her. “Dad. Please lets leave and get a hotel for the night”

Her father stares at her, and sighs once again before sternly saying, “Mikoto. Don’t be ridculous. We’re right in front of the house. I know you’re scared and unhappy but I promise you, there will be changes. Now lets go.” He turns and wheels away their suitcases. This forces Mikoto to race out of the taxi seat, and the taxi quickly drives off, because her father is carrying their luggage and opening the front door with his keys. She runs to try to grab his arm and to get him to face her.

I need to use genjustu on him. I need to get him out of here.

But it is too late.

Mikoto narrowly dodges out of the way from the wretched claw that attacks them at the entryway of the house, her sharingan flares, and she grabs the umbrella leaning against the closet and fills it with cursed energy. There laying against the closed doorframe, is her father Uchiha Kenta, with the upper half of his body cut off. Mikoto feels like time has slowed down and the pain in her eyes increase, as her sharingan spins and spins, until the three tomoe turn and form into six-pointed shuriken while she stares at the blood pooling and seeping outwards on the wooden floors from her dead father.

She races into the living room only to find an orange curse the size of three grown men tall, shaped almost like a bird with no eyes or feathers, standing over Chiyo’s body that is laying on the floor in a pool of blood with her wrists slit open, a knife held in her hands. The bird curse turns its beak and opens its mouth filled with jagged teeth and a thick tongue covered in peaks of spikes and salvia comes her way. She rolls to the right and into the pool of Chiyo’s blood before grabbing the knife on the floor and enforcing it with cursed energy to make an arching movement and slashing the tongue off the bird. The curse screams and purple fluid sprays across the room and into its throat. Mikoto does not let this chance escape her, and cuts the legs off, watching it fall to the ground and break the floorboards. The curse is still screaming and withering on the floor, as Mikoto walks to stand closer to it and holds her fingers up to her mouth, channeling her rage and grief and cursed energy into her throat for in a silent Katon and burning the curse until it is nothing more than a wilted husk and soon, pile of ash.

The fire is large and burns away the living room furniture and walls, and yet Mikoto does not move until she sees the curse fully exorcised and fading away. She blinks and her knees almost give out and she moves to touch her eyes, due to the pain and exhaustion radiating through her head. She backs her hand away from her face, feeling wetness and looks down only to see blood on her fingertips. Her Mangekyo is out. That explains why the curse was so slow. Mikoto looks around the room and feels the heat of the flames spreading across the room and the stickiness of blood on her clothes. Not her blood.

Mikoto takes a deep breathe and does what every good shinobi does. She tucks all her thoughts and emotions away- *ignores the pain in her eyes and heart-*and analyzes the situation she is in and forms a methodical step-by-step plan on how to get away from the situation. The sorcerers will come. They will feel the cursed energy of me and the curse. The house is burning. Civilians will come. She needs to leave.

The fire spreads begins to burn Chiyo’s body and the smell of burning, rotting flesh takes her back to war, and this further snaps her into action. MIkoto races to her room and opens her closet, half-hazardly shoving all her weapons and jounin outfit and kitsune mask into a duffel bag. She grabs her twin katanas, the first swords she’s ever perfected, and looks around the room she spent countless years and nights in with her sharingan still turned on. Mikoto closes the door and makes her way downstairs just as the fire is beginning to cave the roof in from the kitchen. She grabs her backpack from the pile of luggage at the front door and throws it over her other shoulder, and gently moves her father’s body to the side. Mikoto turns around and clasps her hands together for one more silent prayer, before using a final Katon to turn the whole hallway and house into ash.

It is 1992 and loving kindergarten teacher Uchiha Chiyo, with her husband and successful businessman Uchiha Kenta, die in a house fire caused by an electrical accident with their fifteen year old, model student daughter Uchiha Mikoto.

Chapter Text

It has been three years since the fire and the start of her life as a ghost. Truthfully it’s not terrible. Mikoto is mentally a grown woman, and craved for independence since she was eleven in this new world. The firefighters did come, but as expected, were too late to save anyone in the building and more or less, spent all their efforts in making sure the fire didn’t spread throughout the neighbourhood. The sorcerers also came due to the influx of cursed energy, but found no traces of the curse, fully believing that it simply ran away after killing an entire family and not because of a teenage girl; hence multiple sorcerers planted themselves in the city of Chiba searching and failing to exorcise the curse.

After watching the firefighters extinguish the fire, Mikoto dashed covered in blood and a bag filled with weapons in the middle of the night to begin again. She watches the tv in a quaint motel room, as police officers and the news person on screen confirms her death and the death of her parents, further placing her yearbook picture on tv and newspapers. An unfortunate and unprecedented death due to a simple electrical fire causing a small, but loving family to die. Her paranoia is high and she begins her plans of laying low.

She tries not to think about her cousins and aunt and uncle watching the news. Nor does she read the paper with Anna’s face on it, hosting a memorial service at her high school about her. Her grandfather and parents are dead. They are civilians who deserve to mourn and move on with their lives, far, far away from all things surrounding jujustu society and cursed energy.

It’s hard but life is easier and less complicated this way.

Getting fake identification documents isn’t hard, even without genjutsu, it’s more of as long as you know the right people and can pay the right amount, you can get anything. Money was an easier thing to acquire because in this world with no shinobi, information and privacy were simply concepts and things freely given out. She simply had to watch someone type in their banking pin in the lines of grocery stores and ATMs, and casually walk past them in the street to pickpocket wallets and steal all the cards they hold so dear, allowing her to afford simple meals and small motel rooms in different cities.

She lives like this for about six months, before getting bored and restless. Mikoto cannot help but crave the blood and adrenaline from a fight, that runs through her veins likes a craving that she can never stop. She tried to live a normal, civilian life for Chiyo and Kenta and for the countless members of her fallen clan that would have jumped at the possibility to live a life in such a peaceful world. She really did try to ignore the calling of power and steel at her fingertips. She thinks that grandfather only taught her about cursed energy and their technique, only to offer her protection against curses and to warn her against jujustu society, not for her to actually willingly throw herself into the pit of hell.

But she cannot help it. She lived an entire life as a solider, willing to cut down enemies and set fire to them at the orders of the old men in charge of the village. She lived an entire life where only steel and the ability to use it against others mattered. She lived an entire life where war was normal and expected. She lived an entire life with people who breathe fire and have red eyes are her blood and soul. She lived an entire life knowing and accepting that she is a tool and whoever wields her is the master.

So after six months of practicing katas and perfecting her techniques in open fields and small, dingy motel rooms, Uchiha Mikoto opens up her bag and takes out the kitsune mask to don it once again. She sends another prayer to Amaterasu, before plunging herself into the depths of the underworld to live the life she knows and thrives in.

Mikoto has no intention of joining sorcerers and jujustu society because she is a good granddaughter, who listened to the warnings of her grandfather about the hypocrisy and adherence to traditionalism that the jujustu elders forces everyone to abide by. They simply remind her too much of the village and the council, the same council who ordered the massacre of her people by her own son and allowed the casual cruelty of her best friend’s child*.*

No. Mikoto has absolutely no intention on joining them and plans to avoid all sorcerers if she can help it. Instead lives life as a shinobi, or mercenary in the underworld and amongst the scum of civilian and jujustu society. She will take train and take jobs whether they are guarding or killing, simply because it allows her to feed herself and because it is the only life she truly knows how to live. Being known as the ‘Bloody Kitsune’ is easy and cuts a clear divide between her night and day life. If she exorcises curses that bother her along the way, she has no problem doing it, as long as another sorcerer is in the vicinity.

Mikoto is eighteen and it’s eleven in the evening when she decides to head to the convenience for a late dinner. She’s at the cash register picking out cigarettes, when she hears a voice from behind her. “Mikoto-chan?”

She turns and sees a familiar face who is staring at her like he’s seen a ghost. I guess it’s because I technically am. It is Kimura Yashiro, her father’s best friend and former coworker. His face is set in shock, as he rapidly blinks and takes in her alive form. She’s about three hours by train away from Chiba, so unless he’s here for a work trip he must have moved and switched jobs, in the three years she last saw him. She doesn’t really know why, but she inwardly sighs and begins their interaction.

“Hello Yashiro-san. I see you’re doing well.” She bows and gives him a polite smile. Her manners and aimless tone must have snapped him out of it, because he stutters before bowing back and saying, “I didn’t think you would remember me. We only met a couple times, after all.”

She hums and doesn’t drop her smile, “I could say the same to you.”

That makes him close his mouth and straightens his back and she watches him stare at her, as they stand in front of the cashier register in the empty convenience store. Mikoto thinks that their awkward interaction is over, so she decides to not be polite and turn her back to complete her original task of picking out cigarettes. She settles on a pack of Malboros and sets them on the counter, next to the prepackaged bento she found in the aisles. She takes out her wallet to pay, when she sees Yashiro-san move beside her and set cash down. “I’ll pay. I’m taking this too” as he puts another pack of Marlboros down next to hers.

They leave the convenience store together in silence, as she turns to him saying, “You didn’t need to.” Yashiro-san unwraps the cigarette box and pulls out a lighter, lighting the end of the cigarette before putting it to his mouth and inhaling. “I know but I wanted to.” If it was any other time of day she would bow and politely refuse and ask to pay him back, but tonight feels different and she doesn’t really feel like going through all the effort and motions, so she hums and unwraps her own cigarettes. Yashiro pulls out his lighter and hands it to her, and she nods in thanks, before inhaling and feeling the smoke rest in her lungs before exhaling.

They smoke in silence, not looking at each other, simply watching the street as bikes pass by from under the roof of the convenience store. They finish their cigarettes around the same time, and she’s about to excuse herself to go back to her apartment and eat her bento, when Yashiro breaks the silence first. “Do you want to get a drink Mikoto-chan?”

Mikoto pauses, and it’s probably out of respect for her loving late father and partially out of curiosity, that she finds herself accepting. “As long as you know a place that lets me bring food in.” Yashiro-san nods and walks ahead, so she follows, always a step behind him watching his tall back covered with a navy suit jacket. She chooses to focus on the fact that she has food instead of how she’s underage and going to a bar, but considering how she just bought cigarettes, Yashiro doesn’t seem to care.

They find stool seats at a lightly crowded small bar off the side of the road. It’s not exactly high end but not entirely sketchy considering they’re still fifteen minutes away from a major train station. The bar tender doesn’t ask for her identification, merely nodding when he sees Yashiro-san and sets down two beers on the counter. He’s a regular here so he must have moved.

She sets her bento on the table, ignoring the pang of hunger in her stomach; and decides to take a sip of her beer, wondering how she got in this situation in the back of her mind. They trade small talk and drink their beers, always Yashiro-san breaking the silence and asking the questions. “I remember hearing the news about the fire. I’m sorry about your parents” he says, with genuine sympathy in his voice. She nods and politely thanks him for his condolences replying, “I moved to the countryside to live with my uncle and grandfather. I continued high school there and changed my last name because my guardians didn’t want me to be hounded by the media, for my miracle survival” It’s a semi-believable lie. She knows that her father and Yashiro were close, so he probably told him about growing up in a temple in the far countryside of Japan.

Yashiro-san nods and takes a long sip of his beer before asking, “Are you attending university here?” She shakes her head, “I’m just visiting some of my mother’s relatives. I’m attending university in Osaka.” Another lie. Mikoto sees despite this being his third cup of beer and his stature beginning to waver from the alcohol, how his eyes sharpen at the mention of her mother, Chiyo. They stop talking after that. Eventually Mikoto sees that it’s half past twelve and realizes that she’s tired of this interaction, but before she can stand to excuse herself, Yashiro-san lays his hand on top of hers and stares into her eyes.

Mikoto doesn’t really know why she does it. Oh she can see how this looks to outsiders, watching an adult man have a drink and taking home a young, barely grown woman. Mikoto is physically eighteen and hasn’t developed any real interest to people her own physical age.

Maybe it’s because the alcohol has affected her more than she realizes. Maybe it’s because she’s tired and simply needs the quick effect of sex to make her feel something. Maybe it’s because she hasn’t actually been able to feel and experience the pleasures of sex outside of her own hand since being reborn in this new world. Maybe it’s because she can see the growing curse on his shoulders. She thinks it’s all of those things above, as well as the deep, profound way Yashiro-san looks at her at this moment, slightly drunk and melancholic.

Yes, it’s the way he looks at her.

Mikoto thinks, as she feels her eyes close and listens to his quiet grunts as she moans and tries to match the pace of his thrusts inside her and feeling the grip he has on her breast. This is the first time she’s had sex in this new life, and she’s trying her best to slow down and imprint the feeling of something inside her, resisting clawing his back because she knows her strength, and knows she’ll make him bleed.

Since the first time she’s met him, when her father introduced them to each other at dinner when she was fourteen, she had always remembered him being attracted to her and looking at her with innate desire and something else. It was this something else that she’s always suspected and made her somewhat comfortable interacting with him, and why she’s okay with having sex with him right now. Yashiro-san moves his hand to hold her cheek, her eyes open automatically and she stares with her dark onyx eyes into his light brown eyes, as he lightly caresses under her eyes.

Kimura Yashiro is a handsome man with light brown round eyes, prominent nose and cutting jawline. He’s tall and from his years of playing sports most of his, youth he retains a sturdy body, that he tries to keep active and healthy as much as he can as he gets older. He grew up as an only child, being born to two wealthy parents who simply needed an heir to their arranged marriage. Yashiro learned very early on that life was pretty much set up for him, and that with his gender and looks and an easy-going personality, he didn’t really need to work that hard to get people to surround him and fill the void that resided in his chest and rewrite the memories of cold eyes and empty hallways of his childhood home.

Life was easy for him. He was popular in school and later at his workplace as people were easily drawn to him, and he didn’t realize until it was too late that he didn’t feel the same. He got married to a woman in his early twenties and fresh out of university because his parents actually called him inquiring about his future plans and all his friends were doing it, so obviously he had to do the same.

Yashiro did genuinely like Kikiyo. She was pretty and nice and intelligent, and he knew she came from an upper-middle class, well educated background that his parents would approve of. They dated for two months before he proposed. The only thing that he truly found himself resisting against was that she wanted a child.

Yashiro…he just didn’t think that he could do it. He thinks about cold empty hallways and nannies coming to his parent days at school, and realizes that he doesn’t think that he would be a good father. He doesn’t know how to be one nor, does he really want to be one either. He knows that he should. He knows that this is what is expected of him. He knows that all his university friends and future colleagues are doing it and his wife is willing-too willing- and yet, he can’t find it in himself to want a child.

He tries to tell Kikiyo this in the gentlest way possible, trying to convey how badly he does not want to be a father. They slowly drift apart after that conversation and when Yashiro came home one day to find Kikiyo sitting in their dinning room with divorce papers on the table, he couldn’t help but sigh in resignation and signed them silently.

After the papers were signed and dated, him and Kikiyo simply stared at each other in silence, feeling the weight of their decisions and past year together in the forms of papers. Kikiyo sighs and he looks up as she begins talking. “It’s funny. When we first decided to date and you proposed I was so excited. You were the most popular guy at school and I couldn’t wait to tell my friends and family and brag about you. You’re wealthy and come from a prominent family and I know my parents would approve.” She laughs in a soft humourless tone, and turns to stare at him. “As much as I want to blame you for this, I can’t because I know part of me liked the idea of being in love more than anything.”

Kikiyo starts to wipe the solemn tear down her cheek with her hand and he moves to give her his handkerchief from his pocket. She accepts it and swipes at her eyes and laughs hoarsely, “Even now you’re so nice to the wife who’s presenting divorce papers to you.” Yashiro responds sadly, “You deserve it. You’re a good person Kikiyo and I know you will find a man who will be the husband and give you the family you actually deserve.”

She holds and looks down at his handkerchief, tracing the embroidery with her fingers. “You’re just so nice that it was so hard to not want to be with you. I think that’s the problem.” A sudden and confused noise leaves his throat, as Kikiyo continues. “You’re like the sky Yashiro. You’re so beautiful and vast and everyone wants to reach you. But…you’re just so distant. And so, so much further away than anyone else can reach you.”

Kikiyo looks up and gives a small laugh at his stunned face. “My mother said, it’s normal for couples to be more distant after the honeymoon phase. But I realized that you have always been distant Yashiro. I know what foods you like, and what your hobbies and favourite colour is. But I don’t think I actually know you, Yashiro” She says, while shaking her head. “No. I know that I don’t know you. I never know what’s going on in your head or how you’re actually feeling. And all I can blame is myself for not realizing that sooner.” Kikiyo swallows down, and more tears begin to stream down her cheeks.

Yashiro for some reason feels like crying too, and not in sadness at the divorce, but that he realized that Kikiyo was right and was probably the only one who was actually able to confront him about this. This was the first time he was actually called out on his distance with others. All he feels is anger, sadness, shame, and finally resignation that he drove someone he has affection for away. Yashiro gets up from his seat and moves to wrap his arms around Kikiyo, whispering into her hair, “I’m sorry.” Because he truly is sorry for trapping her life with his lifeless one. She cries even harder and other than discussing how to split everything during the divorce proceedings, that was their first and last conversation they ever had with each other.

Kimura Yashiro is rich, tall, and easy-going. His life is easy because he’s charming and handsome and after his divorce he was known for adopting a womanizing attitude, never spending the night with the same woman twice. And as he lays in bed at night, next to a woman he already forgot the name of, he thinks of Kikiyo’s words, ‘You’re like the sky, so beautiful but so, so distant.’ that will haunt him for many more years than what he would like. It is not until he starts his new job at a well-known company that his parents approve of-they talk to him even less now that he’s divorced and childless- he meets someone on the first day of training that would manage to finally overrun the words Kikiyo once spoke to him.

Uchiha Kenta had the ability to be the centre of attention in a room and yet, live and escape to the back of the room at the same time. He was the type of understated person. Someone you don’t realize is there but when you do, you can’t take your eyes off of him. He had the typical colouring of a Japanese person, dark hair and eyes, and was of average height, and on the leaner side. It wasn’t until you looked closer and saw the sharp cheekbones, elegant hands and pointed chin and how his eyes felt as though they were darker than black, that you felt like slapping yourself in the head for almost missing someone like him.

He looks and acts like a woman, he **thought, because **Uchiha Kenta had an air of grace and almost delicate presence in his shy demeanour that made Yashiro think he was raised as a sheltered, nobleman since it was so natural. Maybe it’s because of the symmetrical face and long eyelashes. These thoughts crossed his mind multiple times, as he watched Kenta offer to help one of their colleagues with their paperwork and asking everyone in the office if they wanted him to pick up lunch. Yashiro being the smiling, charming, team player, decided to help that day as well and it was the start of their steady relationship.

Kenta is an open book. In the month that they began conversing and regularly having lunch together at work, Yashiro learned a lot: that he grew up in the countryside sheltered in an actual temple. He has an older brother who’s four years older than him who took over said temple and his mother died when he was young leaving him to be raised by a strict, single father. He played the flute and kendo growing up, and that he has a cute, loving wife who is pregnant. Yashiro usually learns enough to be polite and make small talk after getting to know his colleagues-not too much but not too little either- but for some reason there was something about Kenta that made him want to know more. There was something about him that made Yashiro want to keep those dark eyes looking at him.

It made him nervous. He has never wanted to be in someone’s world so badly before.

Yashiro remembers exactly when he realized why he wanted to know Kenta so much. And like Kikiyo’s words, even after all these years, the thoughts haunt him and lingers in the back of his mind as he stares up at his bedroom ceiling.

It was during the company’s new year celebration. Everyone voted and contributed to go the karaoke bar to celebrate because the quarter was so successful, allowing everyone to receive a pay raise, and nice bonus. The karaoke room they were in was one of the smaller ones, and Yashiro remembers it was only him, Kenta and two other colleagues of theirs, singing and ordering drinks to get away from the bigger ones, the rest of the department was in.

It was Kenta’s turn to sing and they were all slightly tipsy and in good spirits, and rapidly encouraging shy, gentle Kenta to sing in front of them. Kenta laughed nervously and put his drink down, as he got on the small stage and picked a song from the podium. Yashiro didn’t really expect anything, the whole night consisted of tone-deaf performers singing crappy pop songs and the occasional dramatic ballad that makes the whole room laugh.

Kenta put on a song he didn’t recognize but he knew the Western band, and as the sounds of cello and violion strings began to play through the speakers Kenta began to sing, The Beatles ‘Eleanor Rigby’. Half drunk, the bright lights and screaming cheers from the room next door, Yashiro, thinks he would always remember this moment, because shy, gentle, kind Uchiha Kenta is singing and singing good. Yashiro knew that he played flute growing up and could once in awhile hear him hum a tune under his breathe, and that Kenta had a passion for music with a growing record collection, but Yashiro didn’t think that applied to his apparent talent for singing too. Kenta’s low, naturally soft voice, seems to reach the highest and deepest notes to the lyrics with ease and, his sings the words of the foreign language like it’s his natural tongue and that he does this everyday.

Yashiro turns his head rapidly scanning the room, needing confirmation that he is not the only one who can see this. That he is not the only one feeling their heart race and their stomach turning itself inside out, and their mind feeling giddy and rushed. Their coworkers are happy and cheering for Kenta in a way only drunk men can by hooting and making wolf whistles, and Yashiro just wants them to shut up so he can truly listen and focus on Kenta’s voice as he surrounds himself in Kenta’s presence.

After his song is done- it *was only a two minute song. why the fuck did it feel so long?-*Kenta sits back down next to him, and Yashiro can’t look at him with his flushed ears and racing heart. It must be the alcohol. It has to be the alcohol. Kenta is immediately berated with claps on his back and vivacious encouragements to drink and that he should definitely sing again. Yashiro doesn’t think he can handle Kenta singing another song, hearing his voice from all sides of the room and watching him in the centre, so he quickly excuses himself for a smoke break and to get fresh air, ignoring the protests and cutting off any oppurtunities to people who want to join him.

Yashiro makes it to the side exit of the karaoke bar that leads into an alleyway, and has to lean his back against the brick wall, as he rubs his face with his hands and takes deep breathes, to try to calm his racing heart and flushed face. He wants to scrub the memory of Kenta on the podium singing with a microphone in hand, just as much as he wants to put it in a glass bottle and keep it hidden and safe. After several deep breathes, he reaches for his box of cigarettes and begins to pat his pockets searching for a lighter.

“I think you dropped this” a low, voice says to him. Yashiro visibly startles and almost drops the cigarette in his mouth, as he turns his head to see Kenta, holding up his lighter with an apologetic face. “Sorry” he says in a genuine tone. Yashiro tries to shake his head waving off his apology, as he grabs his lighter waiting in Kenta’s hand. He lights his cigarette and inhales before responding, “Thanks”. His head feels like its spinning and he can barely breathe properly, so he bends his knees into a low squat and balances on the balls of his feet, leaning his back against the wall for further support.

“You okay?” Kenta asks, moving to bend his back down and his face is suddenly close, too close, to Yashiro. He chokes and promptly goes into a coughing fit as the smoke directs itself into the wrong pipe-way. Kenta pats his back until his coughing subsidizes and Yashiro feels like a fucking idiot. Why am I acting like a blushing schoolgirl? “Do you want me to get you some water? I can get one of the waitresses inside or there’s a vending machine across the street?” Kenta’s voice is full of concern, as he eagerly but not smothering, asks him.

Yashiro waves him off saying casually, as casual as someone who is almost in tears from coughing, says “I’m good now seriously. I think I just had too much to drink and room was getting stuffy”. It’s a small half-truth but he feels his ears burn, as Kenta simply stares at him with those dark eyes of his, assessing his face for the full truth. Kenta, kind and gentle Kenta, hums and decides to drop it; instead bending his knees into a squat next to him, leaning against the brick wall and pulling out his own box of cigarettes. As he lights his cigarette and closes his eyes and inhales, Yashiro takes the time to silently study him.

The moon is full and bright tonight, and its soft glow beams down in the alleyway, they’re silently squatting and smoking in. Yashiro watches Kenta hold his cigarette between his long, delicate fingers and brings it to his small pink lips. His hands have always enticed him. There is a surprising sturdiness in them from his years of kendo, but his fingers are so graceful and elegant as if they were made to play the flute. The moon is beaming down specifically at Kenta and it makes his porcelain skin glow, further contrasting his dark, almost chin- length hair, that falls in slight waves that brush against his sharp cheekbones. He looked beautiful and elegant even in a dingy cold alleyway and Yashiro commits this scene to memory.

He looks like an angel.

He wants to touch his hair and brush it out of his face.

So he does. Yashiro has never been more grateful for the darkness of the alleyway that hides his flushed face, and the alcohol running through his veins that he can use as a drunken excuse, even though he has never felt more sober in his entire life. Kenta looks startled before shaking his head, concluding that Yashiro is simply just drunk and feeling cuddly, and Yashiro drops his hand, feeling and etching the lingering warmth of Kenta’s cheeks and the softness his hair in his mind.

Kenta chuckles out “I know its getting long. I should probably cut i-” “Don’t.” Yashiro hears himself cut him off. Kenta looks at him and stares confused, and before he can say anything, Yashiro says quickly and surprisingly meek, “I mean-, it looks good. Long. So don’t cut it.” He turns his head and stares straight in front of him at the brick wall, trying to ignore his embarrassment and racing heart at his mistake. “Okay.” Kenta replies in a neutral tone.

Yashiro has to make up for this. He has to fill this awkward silence and correct his mistakes, for touching him and cutting him off, so he says lightheartedly, “Didn’t know you had a voice like that.” Kenta thankfully takes the olive branch and chuckles shyly, “Yeah, I mean, most people don’t. I mainly stick to solely singing in the bathtub.”

Yashiro responds with a light laugh, “Clearly you’ve found your audience and gained some new, extremely passionate fans.” Kenta rolls his eyes and lightly shoves his shoulder before responding, “Yeah, my thousands of passionate fans who won’t even remember most of tonight except for a giant bill and a splitting headache.” Yashiro laughs at Kenta’s well-hidden dry wit and penance for sarcasm that screamed younger brother, and Kenta joins him. “You must had fun tonight then” he says, after their laughs finish. Kenta gives a soft smile and earnestly replies, “Yeah. I did have fun tonight”. Yashiro finds himself giving Kenta a genuine smile, “That’s good. Tha-that’s good” as a comfortable silence lays between them.

“And you? Did you have fun tonight Yashiro?” Kenta asks in a soft voice. Yashiro turns and gives him another easy-going smile and lifts an eyebrow, responding, “Isn’t it obvious?” Kenta turns to him, staring at his face with those pitch black eyes of his-he could felt like he could fall into those bottomless eyes and never reach the bottom- before breaking their impromptu staring contest, by looking down and saying, “I don’t really know.”

Yashiro shouldn’t respond. He should laugh it off. He should say he’s thirsty and needs a drink. He should go back inside and fuck the waitress that was sending him flirtatious looks, in the bathroom. He should say he’s tired. He should just leave.

But he doesn’t do any of those things. Instead he hears himself say, in a casual but rigid way, “What do you mean?” Kenta flinches, and it sends an ache to his chest, but he keeps pressing **because he needs to know, “What do you mean you don’t know Kenta?”

Kenta looks down and is silent, and Yashiro is wondering if he should ask again, when he takes a deep breathe and says in an inscrutable tone, “It’s the way you look Yashiro. You’re always so relaxed and bright and people naturally gravitate towards you because of your personality. But I can’t help but notice how, you’re always in a room filled with people but you still manage to be alone.”

Kenta looks at him with his gentle dark eyes- so dark he feels like he’s looking into an abyss- before giving him an earnest, soft smile. “Sometimes I don’t really know because one moment you’re laughing and completely fine, and other times, your loneliness is showing so transparently that it makes me feel crazy wondering if I’m the only one who can see it.”

Kimura Yashiro feels like he has been struck by lighting as Uchiha Kenta’s words engrave themselves in his mind. In his heart.

‘You’re like the sky, so beautiful but so, so distant’

All the years of tossing around charming smiles and doing the right things and saying the right words. All the years of standing in front of the mirror practicing his smiles. All the years of shaping his personality to be bright and to always be likeable and cooperative. All the years of always being in the centre of the crowd. All the years of staying up at night thinking about the irrefutable fact that everyone likes him but no one loves him. All the years of trying to fill the void and denying the ironclad loneliness that feels like he was born with.

All those years are tossed to the side because Uchiha Kenta sees right through him.

You see me.

You. See. Me.

You see me.

‘Your loneliness is showing so transparently’

‘I wonder if I’m the only one who can see it’

You are Kenta. You are the only one who can see me.

And isn’t that the basis of what every human wants? To be loved is to be seen after all.

Yashiro doesn’t know what face he is making, but Kenta looks at him-*please keep looking at me-*and his lovely face breaks in a sad expression, as he starts to stutter out, “Yashiro! I’m sorry! I’m more drunk than I realize. Just ignore-” Yashiro cuts him off by wrapping his arms around him and shoving his face in his neck feeling the tears leave his eyes, wetting Kenta’s shirt. Yashiro knows that Kenta can feel his tears, because his body relaxes and he slowly winds his arms around Yashiro’s back returning the embrace. As the moon beams down in the empty alleyway and the New Years fireworks are released, two men stay in silent embrace.

They eventually pull away, but Yashiro keeps him in arms length even though Kenta doesn’t seem like he would pull away very far, and Kenta asks him in that soft tone of his, “Are you okay Yashiro?” Yashiro looks into Kenta’s eyes and can see his own reflection in the penetrative, all knowing darkness, and gives him a genuine, small smile that feels foreign on his face. “I am Kenta. Thank you.” Kenta nods and gives him another, more casual hug and Yashiro welcomes the warmth and silently mourns when Kenta pulls away quickly.

Kimura Yashiro can no longer deny the profound loneliness he feels. And as he thinks about how he wants to trace his hands under Kenta’s dark intuitive eyes, and how he wants to feel the softness of his hair and the warmth of his body against his and kiss his pink lips; Kimura Yashiro knows he can no longer deny his feelings about Kenta either.

You see me.

Yashiro-san’s thrusts are rougher now and they begin to quicken, but his touch around the skin under her eyes are featherlight and gentle. He is close. “Look at me. Look at me” he commands, and Mikoto decides to follow his instructions and gives him the mercy- *or pain-*of meeting his light brown eyes with her black ones. His thrusts begin to become sloppier and he buries his face in her hair moaning out, “Kenta”, as his body shudders and he comes.

Mikoto does not know what to do. Yashiro-san’s body is on top of hers and although he’s not that heavy, she is beginning to feel uncomfortable, because all she can hear in her ear is Yashiro-san’s whispers of “Kenta. Kenta. Kenta.” His body shudders again, and she can feel the tears drip on her neck and hair and his cries becoming louder and less coherent. So she was right. She remembered his lingering eyes on her, the few times they met together for dinner with her father. His eyes held attraction to her, but she saw how she was the more convenient subject to lay his eyes on, rather than the consistent and long lingering looks of attraction and yearning Yashiro-san held for her father.

For all she hails this world for, for its advancement of technology and government and art, she does not think she will ever understand the deep-seated adversity to same-sex attraction and rigid gender roles. In her past life, nobody really cared about what gender their partner was. It wasn’t uncommon for shinobi or kunochi to seduce someone of the same gender, civilians were weak after all, especially to pretty things. Nobody cared that her and Kushina dated. They cared because Kushina was the Nine-Tails Jinchuriki and she was an Uchiha. They cared because Mikoto was in-line to marry Fugaku and give the clan an heir.

Maybe it was only Japan and the countries in east Asia that demonize and diminish the very thought of homosexuality, due to all the articles she’s read about the same-sex activists being Westerners. Then again humans are all the same no matter what. She thinks about what it would be like to grow up here, what it would feel like to be an actual child only knowing and living in the rigid, small world of Japan, and it is that moment that allows herself to be kind and to have pity for Yashiro-san.

To grow up knowing that loving your own gender is wrong. To befriend and fall in love and yearn over someone who is married. To mourn someone and know that your feelings will never be reciprocated because they are dead.

What a lonely existence to live.

She thinks back to ironically what Chiyo said when she was grieving Seiko, ‘I don’t know where to put all my love’. Chiyo didn’t have Mikoto’s love nor does she think she would want it, but she had her husband, her siblings and her parents to help her find a place to lay all her love. As Yashiro-san is sobbing into her hair, Mikoto knows that Yashiro-san has no place and no one to put all his love and grief. So she decides to thank him for the free cigarettes and beer and for taking her virginity, by wrapping her arms around the grown man and rubbing her hands up and down his back, letting him grieve for his lost love in her hair. It feels oddly familiar.

Mikoto didn’t realize she fell asleep until she wakes up groggily. She must have been more tired than she realized, and she takes a quick look at her surroundings and sees that the sky is still dark and the moon is still bright, so it had only been a couple of hours. She turns and sees that Yashiro-san is awake too and he’s leaning against the pillows staring at her. Even without the sharingan and only the low light from lamp on the side table, she can see that his eyes are downcast and red from sobbing.

She moves off the bed, and ignores the wince between her legs, and walks towards her sweater on the chair across the room, to rummage through her pockets to find her cigarettes and lighter. She sees a robe hanging on the closet door and decides to throw it on. Her inner thighs are clean and she notes that the covers were thrown on her naked form, meaning Yashiro-san does have some form of decency. Mikoto opens a small crack in the window and lights her cigarette, slowly inhaling and exhaling the smoke through the window, and decides to sit on the chair instead of going back to the bed. She doesn’t look at him but she can feel Yashiro-san’s eyes on her, watching her through all her actions.

Yashiro-san moves to stand up from the bed and walks to grab his underwear from the floor, as he takes out his own pack of cigarettes and sits down in the chair in front of her. He lights his cigarette and smokes out the same window she does, not looking at her, instead choosing to stare out in the night. They don’t talk.

It’s only when they both complete their cigarettes and move to take out a second one, when Yashiro-san decides to break the quiet evening. “I’m sorry” he says. She continues to look out the window lightly humming, “For what?” His breathe stutters and his hands rub his face before responding, slightly muffled behind his hands, “Everything”. Mikoto wants to roll her eyes at his now, harrowing guilt and self-pity over fucking a girl who was young enough to be his daughter. And she was. She was the daughter of his best friend, which basically makes her his daughter. Or maybe he’s apologizing for crying about her father. Who knows? And Mikoto frankly, can’t find it in herself to care enough past the blight of pity and sympathy she had initially granted him by allowing him to mourn.

“You didn’t force me and I knew exactly what you were propositioning when you asked to get a drink. I got to have sex and you got to grieve. We both got things out of it.” Yashiro-san breath further stutters and he groans, “It was still wrong of me, for so, so many reasons.”

Mikoto is a shinobi. She’s done many wrong things, albeit, having sex with her best friend’s kid wasn’t on her list of sins, but she knows that the age factor isn’t something that shinobi care about in terms of killing or sex.

“Does it matter?” she asks him. He looks up at her with a confused face and she continues, “The only people who can chastise us are gone now. So does it really matter?” Maybe it was cruel thing to say but she’s tired and hungry, and part of her wants to ignore the fact that she took advantage of a man’s grief for easy sex. Yashiro-san’s face breaks and she can see the tears forming in his eyes, as he closes his eyes and takes rapid breathes in and out. His breathing slows down after two minutes, “No. I guess it doesn’t matter” and he takes out a second cigarette to light.

“I really was okay with it. Loving him in silence.” She doesn’t make a sound, but slightly moves her head to signify that she’s listening. She doesn’t think he sees it though, and settles at the realization that Yashiro-san simply needs to confess his thoughts. And if talking to a ghost in the form of teenage girl is the only way, she thinks that he is more sad than she initially realized.

“I thought I was so good at it. So good at fooling people and smiling and going with the flow. And I am. The only people I could never fool was my ex-wife and Kenta” He takes a long inhale of his cigarette, before blowing the smoke out the window. “He saw right through me and told me half drunk on New Year’s Eve, ‘your loneliness is showing so transparently’ and I knew I was a goner. He saw me. That simple act. That one simple act was enough for me to love him in silence, probably for the rest of my life and the next one. It’s so fucking unfair and so fucking painful but I wouldn’t regret loving him for a second” Yashiro-san lets out a small, mournful laugh, and he turns to look at her.

Mikoto is staring back at him, as the moon is beaming down in the small, ugly motel room, and she wonders if he is really seeing her for the first time tonight. Yashiro-san gives her a small, wistful smile with eyes glazed over with tears. “You have the same eyes. The freakishly dark, all-seeing, Uchiha eyes. I don’t know you… and I know I’m going to hell for tonight, but I hope one day, you’ll find someone who sees you, Mikoto-chan. Your loneliness is transparent too.”

Her face is blank but her body fills with rage and anguish, and for some reason, she feels like she wants to cry and she has to actively keep her pulsing Sharingan from being released.

She hates crying. She hates this night. She hates that she still feels a pang of hunger in her stomach. She hates being a shinobi. She hates her parents for dying. She hates this man. She hates that she decided to cut off her family. She hates Itachi. She hates this world. She hates Kushina for dying. She hates living as a ghost. She hates the village. She hates that the first person in this world who can see her loneliness is only seeing her father.

She wants to kill him. She wants to slit his throat. She wants grab his throat and strangle him with her bare hands and ride his cock until she comes. She wants to use genjustu to melt his brain and have him drop dead like an abandoned doll. She wants him to forget everything about her. She wants to rage and scream and cry.

What do you know about me? You’re nothing but a sad old man. How can you see through me so easily? You fucked a child and now you want to give advice? How dare you assume that our grief and loneliness is the same? You’re a civilian. Why are you only seeing my father and not me? How dare you see me?

Mikoto closes her eyes and wills away her tears and rage, and gives Yashiro-san a simple nod in acknowledgement. She finishes her second cigarette and stands up to put on her clothes, and reaches for a senbon in the sleeve of her black hoodie. She quickly fills the senbon with cursed energy and throws it with ease, at the curse that’s been following Yashiro-san and is hiding in the corner of the dingy motel room the whole night. Mikoto walks up to stare at Yashiro-san and he looks up at her moonlit face, right into the spinning red eyes of the Sharingan. He flinches, and she moves to grasp the back of his head, holding him in place. In her final act of pity and kindness she says, “I hope, no I know, that someone will be able to see you again Yashiro-san. Thank you for the cigarettes. Goodnight.”

His body slumps and his eyes close shut, as his head hits the back of the chair. The genjutsu she applied was an easy one, but a kind mercy. In the morning Kimura Yashiro will wake up to an empty motel room, remembering he took a faceless woman with dark hair and eyes to bed. He will remember that he confessed to her about his love and grief for Uchiha Kenta. He will wake up knowing Uchiha Kenta and his wife and daughter died in a house fire. He will wake up feeling embarrassed but lighter, after finally being able to confess his feelings. He will dream about Uchiha Kenta smiling at him and telling him that he can let go now.

Uchiha Mikoto carries her emotions with her, she cannot help it. She is an Uchiha and knows that emotions are born and burned into her very being. It is the exact opposite of an unfeeling tool that all shinobi thrive to be. Her mother once told her that she doesn’t think that Uchiha were meant to be shinobi.

“We’re too much like fire. We burn and with our eyes we can never stop burning until it is too late. We carry our love and grief everywhere we go. It is such a wonderful and painful existence.”

When she was a teenager she didn’t understand. We’re strong how can we not be shinobi? How can we protect our home? Fighting and missions was fun. It was the thrill and blood and winning most of all.

But then the war happened, and then the Nine Tails was released, and everything went downhill from there.

She thinks she understands her mother more than ever now, especially since she has been reborn in a world completely devoid of shinobi and hidden villages and chakra in general. She understands why her world is so wrong and cruel in the eyes of others, but fighting and the thirst for blood is carved into her bones. She is still an Uchiha and she still has her Sharingan. So she will carry the burden of her clan and memories as the sole survivor and continue to live because that is who she is. That is what her name and clan deserves. It is the least she can do for giving birth to their executioner.

The years go on and Uchiha Mikoto continues to live. She continues taking jobs and further establishes her place in the underworld of Japanese society amongst sorcerers and civilians, becoming a feared and powerful and professional figure. She makes a lot of money through these mercenary jobs and illegal yakuza channels and she saves it all, occasionally splurging on rare weapons and rebuilding her record collection. Mikoto used her knowledge from all the investing textbooks and during the daytime, plays the role as day trader in the stock market from home.

She travels and learns more about the world, it’s easier now that she’s a legal adult because people just assume that she’s a young woman with rich parents and is suffering with wanderlust. The spicy food in Thailand soothes her tongue, the history of Rome fascinates her, the clothing in Paris feels like silk around her fingers, the underground concerts in the United Kingdom fills her ears and the literature of Russia stimulates her mind. The world is so large and overwhelming but it comforts her, when she lays down in the endless, fresh fields of green in the Netherlands or eats lunch on the rooftops on the high story buildings in New York looking down at the millions of people bustling through the crowds, to know that she cannot be the only one who is overwhelmed and a little lost in the world.

Mikoto stalks and memorizes the cursed energy signatures of everyone she’s known from before the fire, to ensure they never meet again.

Sometimes she lays in bed with a woman with red hair in Florence or a man with dark stern eyes in Busan, she thinks about what Yashiro-san said to her all those years ago. ‘Your loneliness is transparent’ and she knows it is, hence she slips through the window of nameless people she took to bed that night, and runs across the rooftops alone with the moon beaming down at her.

Everyone she loves is gone and it is her duty and burden to carry on their memories and ghosts. Mikoto cannot find it in herself to cross the distance between her and others. She is not exactly happy, but she is content. It is an inherently lonely and hard life to live, but Mikoto will always choose the difficult path and will always choose to fight for her survival even if it means she must guard her heart.

It is not until she is twenty-one and is meeting up with her handler in Jujustu related jobs, Kong Shiu, that Yashiro-san’s words resurface in her mind again.

It is 1998, Uchiha Mikoto is twenty-one again and she meets the person who will see through her jagged, guarded heart and loneliness; and chooses to fight along her side, down the path to hell.

Uchiha Mikoto is twenty-one when she meets Zenin Toji.

Chapter Text

Zenin Naobito knew he made the right decision to keep tabs on his wayward monkey nephew, and celebrates by patting himself on the back and buying several new bottles of sake. His surveillance paid off because the monkey had actually come to father the Ten Shadows Technique. It was just as laughable as it wasn’t and felt like one of those fairytales from the library scrolls that are meant to teach children a moral or lesson. A mere monkey spawning the technique that will raise the clan into a new golden age of Jujustu, so finally Jujustu society will stop dancing to the tune of the Six Eyes and Gojo clan.

Now all Naobito has to do is get Toji to sell the brat to be raised as a proper Zenin. He knows Toji needs this, just as much as he wants the Ten Shadows because that fool actually managed to make an active enemy of the Six Eyes. Toji is a monkey but he still holds Zenin blood, and Naobito got so drunk and laughed so hard he almost cried tears when he heard that Toji killed the Six Eyes. He does wonder how the fool is still alive but it doesn’t matter because now he has to negotiate for his son.

They were meeting in a traditional sake house for lunch, a room reserved at the very back of the restaurant and private from the monkeys, and far from any sorcerers. Naobito was surprised that Toji asked to meet here and not a dirty alleyway but he will never deny alcohol, and clearly the assassination of the Star Plasma Vessel paid well, if Toji is spending it on high end restaurants.

Naobito does not sense Toji, he has never been able to, but he does sense someone with civilian level of cursed energy open the sliding doors into the room. It is a woman and beside her stood his nephew towering over her. She is dressed traditionally compared to what monkey society deems, in a fine dark blue kimono embroidered with gold flowers and dragons. Toji is dressed in his usual attire of dark pants and sweater and it makes a comical appearance having them stand side-by side. From his surveillance and her comfortable proximity to Toji, she is his wife and probably the mother of the Ten Shadows. Another monkey. What was her name again? It was an odd sounding one. Doesn’t matter though. Although he is surprised that Toji would invite his monkey wife to be here for the negotiations for the child.

She is an undoubtedly beautiful woman and he unabashedly licks his lips, as he trails his eyes up and down her body and face, ignoring the growl that comes from his nephew. Her dark hair was held up in a complicated fashion with a gold stick that had a glass sun charm at the end. Porcelain skin that contrasted her dark hair and large pitch black eyes stained red and lined with makeup and framed by long eyelashes, that looked as dark as the shadows themselves. Her back is straight and she held herself with the status of a noble woman and not the wife of a mere outcasted monkey. Was she from a minor clan or just another rich monkey family? Those symmetrical features could only be from the result of careful fine breeding. Naobito quietly mourns his drunken mind and lack of information retention when he read about Toji’s family and current status.

Toji walks forward and plants himself down in front of the table like the animal he is. His wife is slower, taking small steps before sitting seiza at the low table. “Naobito-sama. Uchiha Mikoto greets the Zenin Head” she says, in a soft voice and bowed a proper forty-five degree angle, placing her in a triangle in front of her, before rising slowly to face him but never fully looking into his eyes. “Thank you for meeting us. I apologize for keeping you waiting. This restaurant is famous for its preparation of tofu since I see that you have already ordered a drink.”

She is polite and well-mannered. A proper woman who knows her position and is pretty to look at. Zenin Naobito nods in acceptance of food since he’s already here and might as well. He takes a sip of his sake and raises an eyebrow when servants come with dishes of food, another bottle of sake, and a separate small cart with a pot of hot water and tea cups. As he looks down at the assortment of dishes, he notices that they are all small side dishes of fresh fermented vegetables and so called infamous styles of tofu with small trays of sauce to dip. They are all quick and easily accessible dishes, meant more for snacking and not a full meal to go along with the expensive sake and tea that is expected to be brewed.

Toji’s wife speaks again, “Could you at least grant me the honour of brewing you some tea, Naobito-sama?” Toji has not spoken a word other than make grunting animal noises, and normally he would decline or simply ignore her but this arrangement is odd and he is half drunk enough to encourage his curiosity. “You may.” She bows again and turns her body to reach for the ladle to scoop hot water into the tea bowls for cleansing. It is there that Naobito catches the emblem on the back of her kimono. It is a half white, half red fan. Fan. Uchiha. A clan emblem.

Naobito sobers up from this thought and the way the Uchiha woman’s pitch black eyes seem slightly pleased, he knows she deliberately showed him her back. He watches her now, not just for her pretty face but her movements and body language, his eyes constantly wandering to catch her. Her thin fingers are graceful as they whisk the hot water and tea, not too slow and not too fast to ensure that the leaves bloom properly, and the smell of freshly brewed matcha permeates throughout the room. She procures three bowls of tea, before bowing and handing the bowl to Naobito first as proper, and repeating the process to Toji.

As he accepts the tea he realizes something harrowing and is genuinely surprised, as he internally groans at the headache that he’ll need to drown in alcohol later. Zenin Naobito is a drunk and half-assed father and although he isn’t a genius, he is a special grade one sorcerer and decent Clan Head. **Decent would be stretching it but it’s not like they’re not broke and his members are alive. **The point is, despite popular belief, even half drunk he does have the capacity to think.

Everything about this has been deliberate. The invitation to the expensive sake house. The greetings and arrangements of light vegetarian side dishes. The tea ceremony. The flashing of a fucking clan emblem in silk clothing. Toji has no taste nor the brains to go this far just for a discussion. It must be his wife that planned this. It is obvious that Uchiha Mikoto is born and raised in a clan, monkey or sorcerer. Maybe she is a window. The tea ceremony is practiced and graceful and the way she has been well-mannered and held herself was too embedded in her body to not have been raised like this.

He catches her eyes for the first time and she gives a demure bow, “I hope the tea and arrangement of snacks are to your liking Naobito-sama. Please feel free to voice if something is not to your liking.” He narrows his eyes at her and can’t help the chuckle that escapes his throat, as she gives him a shy smile. The tea is perfect even if it’s not as good as sake, and from the completely blank eyes that stare back at him, she knows it is too. He has nothing to criticize her on other than her sheer audacity. Naobito starts laughing harder in bitterness and the ridiculousness of this situation.

Where the fuck did Toji find this woman? He’s seen from the occasional reports that his nephew prefers prostitutes not finely bred clan women. He knows Toji is handsome but Uchiha doesn’t seem like to type to like criminal monkeys. For a second he mourns, that she was not properly married into the clan. Meagre cursed energy reserves or not, it is a waste of good genes and proper manners. She would’ve been a good fuck and able to produce more daughters for the clan, even if Toji looks like he is planning murder. His laughs die down and he sips the tea once more and swishes it in his mouth, before reaching for his cup of sake. This meeting will not just be a simple transaction of Toji selling his brat. No, Toji is not selling his son, he is selling Uchiha Mikoto’s heir to the Zenin clan and that makes this meeting a fucking political negotiation.

Naobito gulps down the rest of his sake and savours the taste on his tongue, sighing while waiting for it to hit his brain, before turning his head to address Toji for the first time. “Let’s get straight to the point. I want your son. I know he has the Ten Shadows technique, so name your price.”

The monkey’s face twists into a scowl before smoothing out, but his eyes are still fierce in defiance, “His name is Megumi. And we don’t want money Naobito.” Megumi. Blessing. He didn’t think that Toji was so sentimental or it was probably the wife that chose such a feminine name. “Ah but you need protection do you not? If it was not for the mess you created and our name being smeared, I would actually applaud you for your stupidity and audacity.” He smirked and picked up his chopsticks to take a bite of the arare. The crackers are fluffy and lightly coated in a sweet powder, pairing well with the intended freshly brewed tea.

“He has the Ten Shadows and is good with a sword. You need him more than we need you.” Toji retorts. “It seems we’re at an impasse then. I’m sure we can arrange something that is mutually beneficial. So once again, what do you want for him? He is to be my heir so I’ll write you a check right now.” Toji growls at this and opens his mouth no doubt to spew uncreative insults, before Uchiha grasps her hand on his arm, and he turns to look at her. He closes his mouth and Naobito is semi-amazed that his nephew is that whipped for sex that he obeys a woman so easily. In a soft voice Uchiha starts, “Excuse my impertinence Naobito-sama, but I heard from my husband that his departure from the Zenin clan was a disruptive event. Especially since he was able to father children outside of the clan and general Jujustu society.” She gives a demure smile and her eyes are clouded in sadness. “It must be such a shame that you cannot interact with your great-nephew, but you must understand that as a mother I cannot give up my child so easily. It is my greatest weakness as a woman.”

She continues speaking. “I have no more family left, and I have always wished for my son to interact with their relatives. I wish for Megumi-kun to grow up a strong sorcerer and there must be some arrangement we can make to insure that and I think the Zenin clan would be a perfect way to do so.” Naobito snorts and chuckles again, while turning his eyes to Toji. “Finally a woman that has sense. Even if she is a monkey, you should actually listen to your wife nephew. The clan can raise him properly. A monkey has no place raising the Ten Shadows. I’ll even allow visitation to soothe your wife’s womanly weakness.”

Toji grits his teeth and spews “You’re not giving me visitation rights just to see my own son. So fuck off with that”. But he doesn’t deny that he can’t teach him how to use the Ten Shadows or Jujustu, Naobito laughs again and smirks into his sake cup. “I’m glad that you’re so passionate about interacting with your great-nephew Naobito-sama. But I’m sure there are other ways to allow family gatherings and interactions with Jujustu society that will relieve the clan of its name” Uchiha chimes in again. Naobito narrows his eyes and addresses her directly, “What did you say woman?” Uchiha widens her eyes and lowers them before looking back up at Naobito with wide, innocent eyes. “I mean…Me and my husband are both still young and in love, so there is a possibility of more children. On top of what Toji did to the Gojo heir, I imagine creating a separate, rogue branch of the Zenin clan does not construct a good image to the rest of Jujustu society. Some might say, a divided house is a sign of weakness.”

The audacity of this monkey bitch. Toji scoffs and picks up yokan to pop in his mouth, not even trying to hide his smugness. The whore sips her tea and looks directly into Naobito’s eyes, all trace of fear or nervousness is nowhere to be seen, “So I am sure that there is a better way to reconcile this without giving up Megumi-kun.” He is frustrated and appalled at her audacity to call his clan weak and his hand twitches to slap her, but the logical side of him knows not to, for now. There is logic in her statement. What is her price? What is she exactly proposing? Proposing. She’s a clan born woman.

“A marriage can be arranged then to reconcile this…rift. Someone from the main branch can marry Megumi.” Toji narrows his eyes, “Who? He just turned seven” Naobito’s drunken mind quickly flips through all the female children in the clan, before he finally remembers. “Ogi’s daughters. The monkey twin girls. Megumi can marry the one with more cursed energy.” What were their names again? Something similar to each other. For once he curses for not remembering their names but why would he? They were useless girls and twins most of all.

From Toji’s furrowed brow he seems to know who he’s talking about though, so it doesn’t really matter. Toji looks to his wife, who is wearing a neutral expression like she was expecting this and they seem to be having a silent conversation, before she nods. Toji turns back to him, “There’s obviously gonna be certain conditions…but draw up a contract.” Finally. Naobito chuckles and takes out his phone to call Ogi to arrange the papers and contracts amd have them delivered to the sake house.

The snacks and tea are consumed in silence while waiting for Ogi to come, and Naobito orders more sake. The tofu dishes are good and he is enjoying this unknown brand of sake so he silently applauds the woman for choosing this place. Ogi arrives and is disgusted and surprised when he sees Toji and his wife, his eyes particular trailing Uchiha and the emblem on the back of her kimono. The conditions are laid out and the general plan for the next ten years is sealed.

The Zenin clan will support the Uchiha’s politically to the elders council. Uchiha Megumi will become clan head when he turns eighteen after he and Zenin Mai will wed. Megumi will have supervised training sessions at the Zenin compound twice a week. Megumi and Mai will have supervised courting arrangements once a week to avoid bastards and to allow them to get to know each other. Megumi will keep his last name and the position as clan head will not change regardless of if he weds Mai. Naobito carefully eyes Uchiha’s shamelessness at that last condition, as her ambition and motherly weakness is showing, but he agrees regardless and mentally prepares himself for Naoya’s whining and laugh at his crestfallen face. It will be interesting to see Megumi and Naoya interact.

The contracts are signed with Ogi and Uchiha acting as witnesses. Ogi smirks as he looks down at the contracts and conditions for the marriage. This union will elevate his status as a father in the clan, his useless daughters will finally have a purpose. “Don’t look like that monkey. Megumi and Mai might actually fall in love. This union will be useful if all parties decide to actually go through with it.” Toji glares, “Shut the fuck up. Nobody was talking to you.” The only woman in the room takes her husband’s hand and gives it a light squeeze, smiling at him. “Megumi is a dutiful boy. The union will be successful as long as your daughter is amiable.” Ogi rolls his eyes and scoffs, “Mai will go through. She knows her duty and place in the clan.” Mai actually knows her manners unlike her monkey sister. His wife despite birthing the cursed daughters, has been raising her to know her place like all women.

Uchiha looks at Ogi with her large black eyes and lightly hums, “I would love to meet my future daughter and get to know my husband’s family more. Marriage can be nerve wrecking to a young woman. I think I might be able to ease her heart if she was introduced to Megumi by a womanly influence rather than her unknown cousin Toji. She is to be my heir’s wife after all and I wish to see what our future grandchildren might look like.” She giggles into her sleeve like a moron and Ogi seems to falter and grit his teeth at her suggestion, but he reluctantly agrees. Leave the women to deal with other women. Toji’s wife seems to be of good stock and he cannot find any faults in her other her marriage to the monkey and her audacity to speak in his presence out of turn. Kami-sama knows that his wife is useless and at least, the Uchiha woman did her duty to bear her husband a son. Naobito does not fail to notice her last sentence, the emphasis of “my heir” and chortles at his brother’s failure to notice the intended faux pas.

The monkey’s wife gives him and Ogi a final polite smile, before bowing and leaving with his nephew. Ogi and Naobito leave as well, and enter the car to drive them back to the Zenin compound. It is late afternoon now and he feels drunkenly sated, but more alcohol couldn’t hurt especially after such annoyingly meticulous negotiations. “Brother. Find out everything you can about Uchiha Mikoto and her clan” he orders breaking the silence in the car. Ogi scowls but nods, “She is unexpected as Toji’s wife.” Naobito snorts. Unexpected is an understatement. He has no care for women and their useless contributions other than birthing more children but he finds himself somewhat relieved to be out of her presence. That woman is a scheming bitch and there is something unnatural about her, but he cannot find himself to fully care and revels in the chaos that is to be in the next ten years.

The Zenin clan has the Ten Shadows again.

Zenin Mai is eight years old when she is told she was engaged.

Mai was scared when her father and Naobito-sama summoned her and her sister and mother to his office, in the east wing of the main house. Mai and Maki rarely see their father, only occasionally passing by each other in hallways, and when he does interact with them, it’s only for scoldings and beatings and threats to the disciplinary pit. Maki hates him. Mai thinks she hates him too but she will never voice it out loud and barely even thinks it. It’s too dangerous and just asking for another beating, and she thinks that it’s somewhat deserved sometimes. They barely have any cursed energy after all. They are useless to the clan.

The three women bow and enter Naobito’s office, and Mai resists hiding and fidgeting behind her mother’s yutaka as the two men stare at them. She doesn’t know a lot about Naobito-sama, only really seeing him at clan celebrations where he is always laughing and drinking a jar or bottle of sake. He is Naoya’s father and clan head though, and that is enough to make her fear him. For some reason it feels like the two men are actually staring at her in particular more, and it makes her heart beat faster because she doesn’t know why. She only saw her father a couple of weeks ago, and Naobito even further in the past. Her and Maki play quietly and try to avoid the east wing, as much as possible. Finally Naobito snorts and breaks the oppressive silence in the room, “She will do. Not the most attractive girl but you better pray she grows up pretty, Ogi. Hopefully he will find her substantial even if he’s used to being around a beautiful woman.”

Mai shares a look with her sister, the confusion on their face is evident. She looks up to her mother’s face and her eyes are wide with fear, and Mai can feel her hands begin to tremble. Zenin Rukia looks at her husband, and stutters out, “Naobito-sama, husband, may I ask what this meeting is about?” Father narrows his eyes at Mother speaking out of turn. Naobito smiles, “Sister in law, your time has finally come and I guess I can spoil the surprise for you but, it will be announced sooner or later. The Ten Shadows is back within the clan”. Mother’s eyes widen as Naobito pours a cup of alcohol from a sake bottle and laughs. “He is not fully obtained, but I have reached an agreement with his parents. Zenin Mai will be his wife to bring him back into the clan and he will be my heir.”

What? Her? His wife?

Mai cannot help but gasp out loud and Maki’s mouth drops open. She looks up at her mother, and her eyes are wide and she clasps her hand to her mouth. Father looks at mother and says in a low, shrill voice, “It is an honour to our family. And you will finally be able to correct your mistake of having these girls.” Mai looks down to the floor and grasps her mother’s yutaka, holding it tight as she avoids her father’s hateful eyes. Mother asks in a quiet, trembling voice, “Ca-can I ask how old is he? Who are his parents?” Naobito answers, “He is nothing more than a child right now, appropriate age for her. Enough time to shape into a suitable heir and his parents insisted that they wed when they are eighteen.”

A child. Eighteen. She will be married at eighteen. Her husband is around her age. Mai is eight now and that gives her another ten years before she’ll be married. It seems all too far but so close at the same time. “Mai”, Father’s stern voice makes her head snap to face him as he actually addresses her for the first time, “You will do your duty as his wife. He is Toji’s spawn meaning he was raised by monkeys and it is up to us, particularly you, to tie him to the clan. Do not disgrace yourself more than you already have.” Mai shakes her head to nod, quietly responding, “Yes Otou-sama. I will not disgrace the clan.” Father nods and turns to speak to mother again. “Rukia. His parents are coming to bring the boy in two weeks time. Toji’s wife in particular wishes to speak to Mai. Uchiha Mikoto is a woman of good breeding even for a monkey. Get her prepared and ready for the meeting.” The three Zenin women are dismissed and leave the office and east wing in complete silence with sullen and fearful faces.

It feels like two weeks have passed in the blink of an eye. The compound seems lively and restless, as Naobito announced to the clan last week that the Ten Shadows technique is returned to the clan this generation. It is the opposite of her house, which has been quiet and even more sullen than usual, despite the bustling of maids and servants coming in and taking Mai’s measurements for her clothing. Her tutors have been relentless about etiquette and being a lady because according to Naobito, her future mother in law is expecting a lot.

Maki is worried and more nervous than she is, choosing to be silent about her engagement and occasionally steering ugly, angry looks at Mai’s complacency and training harder than usual with a stick. She doesn’t get why Maki is so angry. They are women in the Zenin clan and it is expected that they would have to get married for the clan. It’s an easier and more simple route than choosing to uselessly wack around a sword and dream about becoming a sorcerer. Mai is just trying to be excited for all the pretty, silky clothes and new hair decorations. And sure she’s nervous and scared and secretly prays that her fiancée will be nice and nothing like Naoya, but it doesn’t matter because this is her destiny and what is expected of her.

Mai ignores her mother’s swollen, red eyes that look up at her whenever she’s looking at Mai getting her measurements taken. She ignores how she heard Zenin Rukia’s frequent quiet sobs this past week in the living room, when she thought Mai was asleep.

Today is the day she is to meet her future mother in law and see her fiancée. Her fiancée, Uchiha Megumi will only briefly greet her, before heading to training with cousin Toji and Naobito. It is really only his mother that she will be meeting today and it’s only because she apparently insisted on it. Megumi is coming to the compound twice a week for training sessions now, and when they’re older they can have supervised meetings to properly court. Mother explained that it’s better this way. Megumi is now clan heir and he’s busy, and that at least, him and Mai can get to know each other before marrying. Mai and Maki both agree that it is better because at least she will not be marrying a complete stranger.

Her mother dresses her and reminds her to be polite and to remember her manners, pointingly looking at Maki when she says this. Uchiha Mikoto is an outsider and cousin Toji left the clan, so they have raised Megumi as an outsider too. Considering that his mother requested to meet her and Naobito actually granted it, she must be more influential than any woman in the clan right now. She’s never met her cousin Toji but heard whispers and could sense the ill-hidden fear that came from his name. Mikoto must be a certain type of woman to actually marry and have children with him. She does not know what to expect of Uchiha Mikoto.

Mai is at the front of compound gathered around the courtyard leading into the main house with everyone else to greet Uchiha Megumi into the clan. She knows when he arrives because all the lower members and servants in the clan begin to bow. Mai sees him and her cousin following the servants guiding into the courtyard.

He looks like a Zenin. Megumi is a small boy around her age with dark hair and a pointed chin walking in front of his father, Toji down the pathway. He is wearing a navy yukata embroidered with white dragons and a matching white obi wrapped around his waist. Cousin Toji is a broad, muscular man with a scar on his lip who looks pure Zenin with the same eye colour and slanted features that her sister and Naoya have. Toji is dressed in a similar attrire if plainer and more loose than his son. The rumours are true then. He has no cursed energy, even less than her sister and she doesn’t need to turn to know that Maki is in awe of his presence and the fear and respect that the clan gives Toji.

It is hard not to compare the father and son duo. Uchiha Megumi even with a different last name has Zenin blood and is their future clan head, and from the raised chin and fearlessness in his eyes he knows it too. As he gets closer, she can see the slight differences and softness in his features that he must have gotten from his mother. He has the same green Zenin eyes, but they’re wider and rounder framed by long dark eyelashes. He has chubby cheeks that only a child can have, and a lean nose with round lips, and she thinks that if he smiled it would make him look angelic. He’s pretty and not Otou-san’s age so I guess I’m lucky that we’ll have pretty kids. It’s strange to bow and see someone in such high regard when they’re basically the same age.

At least with Naoya he is a strong sorcerer and is almost ten years older than her. She thinks she can hear him grinding his teeth from across the courtyard and knows she must avoid him even more. He’s been even more cruel and slightly sullen to everyone in the clan ever since Megumi and Toji were announced they were coming last week. Just yesterday he beat a maid into the ground for simply tripping in front of him.

There is a certain amount of grace in Megumi’s walk and his back is straight as he comes closer to Naobito and the main family. Mai doesn’t know if she could handle the pressure of this much scrutiny and assessing eyes from strangers, but she thinks Megumi is doing a good job. She doesn’t think it’s arrogance though like how Naoya walks. Uchiha Megumi just looks like he knows he is strong and Mai wonders what it is like to feel that way. What is it like to walk into a compound full is strangers as their future leader? What is it like to know everyone here will be under your foot in ten years? What is it like to be strong?

For a second he meets her eyes and gives a small nod, so he must know that she is his fiancée. Mai nods backs before averting her eyes to the ground, hoping he will not see the flush that comes to her cheeks. She keeps her head down, missing the woman with dark hair that is walking right beside Toji, until she hears Naobito makes his introductions. “Megumi. Toji. Mikoto. Welcome home.” Megumi gives a polite bow to Naobito which contrasts the deep snarl that comes from Toji, and she feels the clan give a wide berth in his presence.

It is when he bows that she sees what is on his back. A large red and white fan, an uchiwa, and it is a brazen display of his clan symbol. His mother’s clan symbol. Uchiha Megumi despite bowing and entering the Zenin compound as their future clan head is blatantly making it known to everyone that he is an Uchiha first, before a Zenin. Seeing the smirk on his face and hearing the whispers about her disowned cousin, she thinks Toji is wearing the same symbol on his back. “Thank you for inviting me into your home Naobito-ojisama. I hope that we can reconcile our branches of the clan and remain strong together.” His voice is steady and his words are stern and confident, but she’s surprised by how high pitched it is. He really is just another kid. Naobito chortles loudly, “Yes, indeed we will. This is your fiancée, Zenin Mai.”

Mai feels a slight push from her mother and she moves forward to face him. She is even closer to Megumi now and kami he is even prettier up close. She bows and he returns it saying, “I hope we can get along well Mai-chan.” Mai manages to say without stuttering in front of the entire clan, “Yes. I hope so too Megumi-kun.” Naobito claps signalling that the introductions are done and Toji and Megumi are rushed into the east wing of the compound. Her father turns to her and her mother and sister, “Come. The Uchiha woman is headed to one of the tea rooms. Remember to not disgrace us.”

Step one is done and now it is on to the true meeting. Her mother bows and they are quickly shuffled down the hallways into one of the tea rooms by one of the servants. Mai’s heart begins to race and for once she agrees with Maki’s confused face. Did Uchiha-san arrive earlier than everyone else? Was she with Toji and Megumi? How did she miss her?

Little did Mai know Uchiha Mikoto was casting genjustu around the whole compound to make her more unnoticeable. She was there just nothing more than a wisp of dark hair walking in the shadow of her husband. Everyone will remember that she was there and was politely introduced but they will not remember anything noticeable about her, as she gazes upon the clan with assessing, spinning red eyes.

They walk to a tea room in the south wing, and Mai feels her palms become clammy, as the servant knocks and slides the tatami doors open and quietly closes behind her, to meet her future mother in law. The room came to a stiffening silence when the three Zenin women came face to face with Uchiha Mikoto for the first time. **

She’s so beautiful was Zenin Mai’s first thought, as she roamed at the flawless pale skin, small pink lips, thin nose and wide pitch black almond eyes. She felt the urge to rub her eyes to make sure that she was real, because how could someone like this not be noticed in the courtyard? For a second her mind felt fuzzy, because Mikoto-san was introduced but she could barely remember and could not believe that she was this unmemorable. Mai quickly looked around and saw that her mother and sister were also quietly stunned at the appearance of this beautiful woman. She felt a shiver of something run through her spine, when those wide onyx eyes locked onto hers. Mai felt like she was gazing into an huge dark abyss, like those eyes could completely see through her and see all the dark thoughts and secrets she held about the clan and her mother and herself. She wanted to run away just as much as she wanted to keep looking.

Mikoto-san broke the stiffening air of the room by giving the three women a gentle smile that lit up her doll-like face and bowed a perfect forty degrees to them as a greeting. Her mother was the first to snap out of her trance and quickly moved her daughters into the room and bowing back. “Thank you for agreeing to meet me. I am Uchiha Mikoto. I am grateful that Naobito-same and Ogi-sama granted us this opportunity to speak.” Mikoto-san’s voice is smooth and gentle, and echoes in the quiet room. Mother nods, “I am also grateful Uchiha-san. I am Zenin Rukia and these are my daughters, Maki and Mai.”

Mikoto’s eyes lower and roam between Maki and Mai, no doubt comparing the similarities and differences between the twin sisters. Her face softens even more in a motherly way, “Hello Maki-chan, Mai-chan. It’s nice meeting you two. I have some sweets and tea for us at the table. Come, it’ll be like a tea party together.” She gives a soft giggle and Mai and her sister find themselves nodding slowly, as they peak behind her to stare at the cookies and mochi on the table. “Thank you Uchiha-san” the twin girls say once they sit at the table. She gives another soft smile, “It’s no problem girls. And feel free to call me by my first name. We are to be family after all, there’s no need to address me so formally.” None of the Zenin women bother reminding her that they are already family since her husband is their cousin, considering that Toji is a disgrace and that Mikoto has been nothing but polite to them so far. Mai can see that her mother looks incredulous, and she is still eyeing Mikoto-san warily even though she’s hiding behind a neutral face, but she nods and says, “Please call me Rukia-san then.” Maki is also slightly suspicious and even slightly worried for this woman. She is too nice and too pretty. She needs to leave and run for the hills if she thinks that this clan actually values blood and the idea of family.

Mikoto begins to plate the snacks on the table for the Zenin women, before gathering up the cups and pouring tea into them and passing them to each other the girls. She serves her mother first, and then Maki and Mai, before pouring the last cup for herself. It should really be Mai serving her, as she is her mother in law and guest to the compound, but Mikoto beats her. Mai is mesmerized at how she can do such simple actions and make it so elegant and alluring with her long fingers, and she takes the time to properly hold her tea cup and sip it, while quietly observing her.

Now sitting across from each other at the same table, Mai could see how Mikoto was actually shorter than her mother and they seem to be around the same age, since Megumi is only a year younger than her. It is strange because Mikoto feels brighter and there are less lines in her face than her mother. She seems to take up the entire room with just her alluring presence, and Mai can’t help but feel insecure and more like a little girl than ever. No wonder Naobito demanded that she dress’s up, because like Megumi she is even prettier up close. Her eyes are lightly lined with thin dark makeup making them even wider and sharper and her lips are slightly stained rouge, and even without the makeup, Mai knows she is just as beautiful with her high cheekbones and long eyelashes. Her posture is perfect and her pitch black hair is done up in what looked like a complicated hairstyle and small ruby earrings dangling in her ears, that complimented the red obi tied around her navy kimono embroidered with white flowers.

Considering her last name and what Megumi and Toji were wearing, Mai thinks that a red and white fan is probably embroidered at the back of her kimono as well. It is her **clan symbol and blatant claim to Megumi and Toji. Other than her hair, which surely must be heavy, it is actually quite simple attire; and yet Mikoto is somehow presenting herself like she is a noble woman from a prominent Jujustu clan rather than the wife of her disowned cousin. In a way she is though, she is the mother of the clan heir. But when has being a mother ever mattered in this clan? And she probably was a noblewoman, from the grace and symmetrical features, even though Mai has never heard of the Uchiha clan before. Where was she from anyways? She has lower cursed energy reserves than her sister. What family is she from?

They continue to have a tea party for the next hour and Mai finds herself not having a bad time. Mikoto primarily asks questions to Mai, but she doesn’t ignore her sister or her mother either. Mikoto compliments her mother’s hair and commends her for raising two well mannered beautiful girls. Mai learns that she went to school with other kids rather than have private tutors. Her mother tries to ask about the Uchiha clan and Mikoto confirms that she grew up in one, and how her grandfather emphasized her lessons in the arts whenever she visited him. Mai’s mother looks a little annoyed that Mikoto never really confirms whether she is from a sorcerer clan though, but clearly her civilian one is prominent enough, to teach her lessons on calligraphy and music and painting. She responds that she likes to draw and is interested in learning an instrument, when Mikoto asks if she likes any of those things and that seems to be a good answer because Mikoto gives her an approving nod. “They are good skills to have and entertaining guests is always something fun to do. I’m teaching Megumi how to play the piano now, and he seems to like it when I play the opening theme songs to Pokémon and Avatar.” She doesn’t know what those are but, she looks at her mother and knows that a music tutor will be added to her lessons soon.

Mai says that she likes the cookies and tea, and Mikoto’s awards her with a shy smile and says that she’s so thankful because she made them herself. She leans closer to Mai and lowers her voice and raises her kimono sleeve to her face, like she’s telling a secret, “These are actually the second batch. I made them so many times, but I was so nervous for today that I forgot to take them out of the oven. Thankfully Toji and Megumi didn’t mind eating them, those boys have the appetites of animals. I swear you would think that I never feed them!” Mai finds herself giggling and even Maki snorts out loud. She’s having fun and she berates herself for being so scared to meet Mikoto. She looks around the table and sees that Maki is enjoying the snacks and listening to the chatter, and even her mother is growing less and less wary at Mikoto, as she peacefully sips her tea and her lip twitches upwards.

The nice tea party atmosphere comes to a halt though, when she asks Maki about what she likes to do, and Maki actually says out loud, that she likes to train to be a strong sorcerer. Mai snaps her head towards Maki and glares, while she feels her mother stiffen and slightly cough into her tea cup. She’s so embarrassed and ashamed, because of course Maki has to be a meathead and mention Jujustu and her useless training to such a polite outsider. Mikoto is clearly a non-sorcerer, of course she would be disgusted and confused about Maki’s stupid dreams, especially compared to her own son who is the new clan heir. She’s a lady, an elegant woman of good stock, why would she be interested in Maki’s training? Why can’t Maki just remember her manners and let them talk about proper womanly activities? She hopes that Mikoto won’t think that Mai dreams about being a sorcerer too. She’ll be a proper wife to Megumi and do her duty like all Zenin women before her and she nervously awaits for her response.

Her mother opens her mouth to quickly excuse Maki’s manners but, Mikoto surprises them all. She looks Maki in the eyes, and gives her a gentle smile, “I’m sure you’re strong Maki-chan. I hope your training goes well. I believe that you will make a name for yourself soon.” Mai’s eyes go wide and even her mother looks confused, and she sees that her sister is staring at Mikoto in the eyes, searching for any tone of mocking or disbelief in her face. There is none. There is simply pure confidence and kindness in Mikoto’s eyes, like she truly believes that her unruly big sister with no cursed energy can actually be a sorcerer in this clan. Maki’s face flushes and she nods before taking another bite of her cookie, keeping her big mouth shut. Mai doesn’t actually believe it and she thinks Maki’s dumb for training and dreaming about being a sorcerer, but she cannot help the warmth and spark of happiness she feels, when she hears Mikoto’s response and encouragement. It makes sense because Mikoto is married to Toji, someone with no cursed energy, but her cousin is also a man and this is the Zenin clan. It is still impossible for Maki. It’s so weird. She’s mad and jealous that Maki always gets to do what she wants and uselessly hope for a life outside of the Zenin clan, but she’s also happy and proud that someone can actually see her big sister and all her efforts.

Mai isn’t strong like Maki. She feels the irony of the situation. She has more cursed energy than Maki but is sitting across the table from the mother of her seven year old fiancée. She’s supposed to be the star in this meeting and instead feeling of jealous and insecure that she’s being pushed to the side while Maki gets praised again. It’s not fair.

Mikoto peacefully sips her tea like she did not just awaken something in Maki’s spirit and bring upon Mai’s insecurities. The snacks are halfway done and it’s almost been a complete hour since they started talking and she thinks that their first meeting will come to an end soon, as a pondering silence comes into the room. Mikoto breaks the silence and starts speaking again, “It’s been so nice meeting you ladies. I’m glad to know that my family is welcomed in the compound and I hope that you’ve learned a little about me.” Mai responds, “Of course Mikoto-san. It has been wonderful to talk to you” and Maki nods in agreement. Mikoto gives a gentle smile, before turning her gaze towards mother. “Rukia-san, excuse my suddenness but could I request to speak to Mai-chan and Maki-chan alone? It will only be a for a little bit.”

She is confused now, and Mother’s face turns blank as she looks at the twins before questioning Mikoto in a slow tone, “What is it that needs to be discussed that we already have not achieved?” Mikoto smiles, “Oh nothing important. I just want to talk to Mai-chan more about her fiancée and the conditions laid in the contracts.” Mother narrows her eyes and she looks like she is going to question her again, when Mikoto gently reaches and grabs her hands from across the table. It was so quick, and her hands are so pale and dainty as they wrap around her mother’s. “I specifically requested this meeting from Naobito-sama and Ogi-sama between me and Mai-chan, but Maki-chan has managed to enchant me too.” She giggles a little and her large black eyes go wide, as she tilts her head making her look cute and innocent, “You’ve raised such wonderful girls Rukia-san. As a mother I simply wish to personally welcome my daughter-in law and her sister into my family. As a dutiful woman I would hate for my new granduncle and husband to hear that we couldn’t achieve the intended goal.” The atmosphere around her mother and Mikoto turns weird now, and Mai discreetly looks at her sister to see the same confused and watchful expression on her identical face. Mikoto hasn’t said anything mean or wrong. Why is mother acting weird?

Zenin Rukia’s eyes widen but her face is completely blank, as Uchiha Mikoto feels the well-hidden flinch of anger and fear at the mention of Naobito and Ogi. The room feels like it is closing in on her. The sweetness of the mochi and the floral flavour of the roasted tea turns bitter on her tongue, when she gazes into the dark abyss that is Uchiha Mikoto’s eyes. No, not an abyss. A black hole.

Zenin Rukia knew this woman was off. Whether it was from a deeper female intuition or simply just the maternal worry for her daughter’s mother-in law, she could feel that there was something odd about this woman. She has been fooling everyone with her elegance and hosting abilities, even she has been relaxed and more open with this stranger, and no wonder her husband thinks she is the perfect, submissive, noblewoman for the clan. Like all men in this wretched clan, other than apparently the disgraced monkey, Ogi does not see the cunningness and bloodlust in her eyes. Naobito-sama told her that the monkey’s wife was interesting and would probably request a briefing later, but he did not warn her that she would be feeling like prey looking into the eyes of a predator. Naobito and Ogi granted her request to this private meeting, meaning this woman truly does have favour, at least more than Rukia does. She also has the Ten Shadows and the Sorcerer Killer at the palm of her hands. And now she is asking for her daughters.

Zenin Rukia should say no. She should take her daughters and leave the room. She should have a servant escort Uchiha Mikoto to her husband and son. But the flashes of Ogi and his anger run through her mind and she can feel the traces of his hands on her body.

I’m sorry Mai. I’m sorry Maki.

Mikoto’s grin turns slightly sharp and Rukia flinches again, before she slowly nods. She gently squeezes her hands and lets go, as her smile softens, “I’m so glad that we are to be sisters soon Rukia-san. You’ve been a delightful companion and the next time I visit, I would love to have tea with you again.” Rukia stares harder at the outsider’s doll-like face and the soft smile that makes you ignore her empty black eyes, and says stiffly, “Of course Mikoto-san. Welcome to the Zenin Clan.” She gives a polite bow before opening and closing the sliding door, leaving her daughters alone with Uchiha Mikoto.

Mai and Maki cannot help watching the strange interaction between their mother and Mikoto. The atmosphere in the room changes back to how it was before, girlish and light, but not exactly to how it was when their mother was in the room. Mikoto pours more tea for the girls and plates more mochi for them, pouring more in her own tea cup. Mai is the one to break the awkward silence, “Um…how come you can’t talk about the marriage with mother in the room?” Mikoto lightly hums, “Oh I could. It would just be easier if Rukia-san wasn’t here. Plus it was a small test.” Maki narrows her eyes, “What test?” Mikoto looks up from her cup and looks into their matching green eyes and gives them another gentle smile, “I was testing if she loves you two more than she fears the clan. It is safe to say she failed.” The Zenin twins flinch at the juxtaposition of her soft voice and demure smile and her blunt words, that it takes a couple of seconds for Mai to dissect her statement, and she flushes in shame. Their mother does not love them enough to protect them from the clan.

Maki is flushed and she starts to open her mouth in hesitant protest, before the atmosphere of the tea room completely changes and Mai snaps her head up only to feel a shiver of fear run down her spine. Gone, was the fun and welcoming atmosphere of their tea party. Gone, was the gentle smile and motherly kindness in her body language. Zenin Mai is instead faced with bottomless, all seeing dark eyes and porcelain skin that suddenly looked like it was made of real stone. The true face-and Mai later learned- at least one of the faces of her future mother in law, was sitting in front of her and her sister. Maki’s mouth is closed shut and Mai immediately straightens her back and prepares for judgement as Mikoto’s eyes roamed her up and down, quietly assessing her.

Mikoto sighs, “I can’t say that this situation is ideal, for Megumi and especially for you. I apologize if my words were too blunt but they are not necessarily untrue. You will understand one day or maybe you’ll agree with your mother’s actions, but I could never leave my children to a stranger simply because I fear my husband.” She picks up a cookie and takes a bite, and Mai is now realizing that this is the first time Mikoto actually ate one of the snacks she brought, throughout the past hour. Maki is deep in thought, realizing that this woman threatened their mother to leave and she is such a coward she actually followed through, leaving them alone with an outsider who can enact Ogi and Naobito’s word with a smile on her face. She should be used to this but she still feels angry and scared and disappointed at her mother. No, I don’t think Mikoto fears the clan, even if she does, she loves clearly Megumi more. What does that feel like?

Mikoto chews and quietly assess the cookie, flipping it back and forth, and hums in what sounds like approval. She continues quietly eating and from the flick of her eye in her direction, Mai realizes that she is waiting for her response. She tries to sound confident and calm her racing heart, “I have no issue with the union, Mikoto-san. I would be honoured to be Megumi-kun’s wife.”

Mikoto reaches for her cup of tea and quietly hums out, before taking a sip, “Honoured you say…” she finishes eating her cookie and drinks her tea, slowly reaching to pour another cup for herself. Once she finishes refilling her cup, she finally looks at Mai again and her face softens, allowing for the gentle expression she previously had on to overtake again. “Mai-chan you are young and marriage, at least from what I have understood from Jujustu clans, is a lifelong commitment. I will admit to being biased when I say this, I am only a mother after all, but I know my son is kind. He will not harm you intentionally, and he will learn to see you as a friend and partner. Megumi may not love you but he will respect you. Is that enough for you?”

Maki looks surprised, her jaw dropping in an unladylike way. Mai feels the same but tries to keep a straight face. She thinks that Mikoto is being honest again or at least somewhat truthful, considering how she admits to being biased, and how she has been nice to them other than kicking her mother out of the room. Kindness. Mikoto must have raised Megumi to be somewhat kind, and he’s an outsider, so he hasn’t been influenced by the Zenin male mentality. Mai doesn’t know anything about Toji, but considering he left, he is also clearly different from the men in the clan. Sometimes Mai thinks about her future and how she wants to fall in love and have children, and that she doesn’t really mind being a housewife. But she was born in the Zenin clan, and as she grew older falling in love is her version of a silly dream, like Maki’s dream of being a sorcerer. Respect. It will not be love but she will have a husband that respects her, and she can live with that, especially in this clan. “Y-yes. It will be enough for me Mikoto-san.”

Mikoto looks impassive but says, “I will ask again when you are sixteen and officially start to court. But if you are truly satisfied than we can continue.” Her eyes harden slightly, although she still has a gentle smile on her face. “I have a request from you both of you.” Maki looks outwardly suspicious from how she furrows her eyebrows and Mai can’t help the caution in her tone, “What is your request?” What do you want from us?

Mikoto eyes softens and her smile turns motherly and gentle, “I understand due to your…upbringing…you may have heard different things about what it means to be the wife of the clan head. Hence, from you both of you, I request to teach you two lessons. I will teach you how to be a clan head’s wife Mai-chan, in the way of the Uchiha. I am sure you have both noticed how my husband does not have any cursed energy and yet he is strong, so Toji will teach Maki-chan how to fight with no cursed energy. We will teach you two to be strong.”

Maki’s eyes looks shocked and suspicious but her eyes gleam with interest, and she cannot stop the glimmer of hope in her heart. Cousin Toji is strong. He’s like me and finally she can be taken seriously and run away from this shit-hole clan. She doesn’t need to be a cowardly, simpering woman like Zenin Rukia. She can fight them all and leave. Finally she can protect Mai, so she doesn't need to stay and get married to a stranger. But it is also the stranger’s mother, who is offering this chance. Zenin Maki thinks Uchiha Mikoto is crazy because what lessons can she offer Mai? This is the Zenin clan and Mai can never get stronger under their thumb. She’s only offering them this chance if Mai marries Megumi.

She looks at her sister, and this time Mai’s jaw is dropped open and she finds herself at loss of words. Mai looks down and stares at her soft hands trying not to fidget with the edge of her kimono, and she finds herself whispering with surprising bitterness in her voice, “You’re a woman. This is the Zenin clan. What lesson can you offer me? How on earth can you possibly be strong?”

Mai actually voices Maki’s thoughts but she is still surprised, her well-mannered and quiet sister, actually says it out loud and with such bitterness and rudeness in her voice, especially in front of her noblewoman mother-in law. She turns to her looking stunned and glares. “Mai! Shut up!”

Mai turns around to face her. Her matching green eyes glare back and she snaps, “But it’s true! We are girls and this is the Zenin clan. How can a simple wife be strong? We barely have any cursed energy. There is nothing I can offer other than my body and name.” I am not like you. I am not an outsider. I am not exceptionally beautiful. I do not have a powerful husband. I am not strong like Maki. All I have is my last name and a mere ounce of cursed energy. Mai feels so stupid and angry and she hates how the world is so unfair. She wants to cry because why can’t everyone understand that she wants this. How can everyone not see that she’s not strong and it’s stupid to even try. She wants to be married. She wants to have a husband that will be nice to her and respect her. It is her only path and it’s being ruined.

At this Mikoto grabs her hands and gently squeezes them and Mai meets gentle eyes and a soft sad smile. Her hands are warm and she is surprised by the callouses and sturdiness in her dainty fingers. “The world is inherently unfair and I think you two know that better than others. Because it is unfair, we must make do with what we have, in order to make it revolve around us and even the playing field.” She turns to look at Maki and moves to look at Mai again, “What do you two think being strong means? What is strength?” She does not expect an answer from them, as she continues speaking looking directly into Mai’s eyes. “Strength is a tool, an advantage. Physical strength and cursed energy is a tool. You are right Mai, your body and last name is a tool. Anything can be a knife if it is sharpened enough, and any knife can kill”

Mikoto gently squeeze her hands again, and Mai find courage in the warmth around her to ask, “How can I be strong then? I don’t have anything but the clan?” Mikoto gives her a small smile, as her face hardens and her eyes turn to steel. “You’re not perfect but you have a lot to give Mai. I can teach you to be strong and sharpen the skills you already have in this clan. You are raised as a Zenin, you can offer information and opportunities that Megumi does not have access to, and in ten years, you will be an Uchiha. Uchiha are not weak.”

Uchiha. Megumi is keeping his last name even when he becomes clan head. In ten years she will no longer be a Zenin, but an Uchiha. Mai thinks about Megumi’s walk into the clan compound, the straightness of his back and the confidence of his stride into a group full of strangers. How he looked so assured and strong as he proudly wore the emblem of a red and white fan on his back. She thinks about her cousin who loudly left the clan and claimed his wife’s last name. She thinks about Mikoto and how just her presence filled the room and how confident and assertive she is. Uchiha Mikoto is strong.

Mai looks up into Mikoto’s onyx eyes and slightly flinches at the hardness of them, although they are not cold. “I do not need my son to have a simpering, obedient wife Mai. If you are to be his future wife you will be strong. I will not allow my son to be distracted and burdened just because his wife is afraid. You will be strong and you must survive this clan and stand by his side to survive his successful take over.” She speaks like she is planning war. Her eyes are so dark and she speaks with such certainty and confidence in herself, that eight year old Mai believes her. She wants to believe her. For the first time, she feels a glimmer of hope in her chest, and a whisper in her mind that, she can be strong too. It is something so outrageous, but she can’t find it in herself to deny it because it feels true in her heart.

Mikoto lets go of her hands and Mai feels herself missing the sturdy warmth. She takes a sip of her tea and stares at Maki, “Even if you decide not to accept my request, Toji will still teach you Maki-chan. He is aware of your position and potential and has taken a genuine interest in you.” She turns her head to Mai and says, more into her cup than her, “I did not lie to you when I say my son is kind. Megumi will still treat you with respect if you decide to be a simpering, broodmare, Mai-chan. But I can you tell you now, you will not have my respect nor will you have my approval” Nor will you have the respect of yourself, the words go unsaid, but even a child could see it in her cold gaze.

Maki asks and looks directly into the outsider’s black eyes, “What do you want in return?” Mikoto’s lip twitches, “Nothing. It is for your own benefit and the benefit of my son hence this is a request. I am asking you two to grant me the opportunity to teach.” Maki and even Mai looks suspicious. This feels like a dream and it cannot be real because it feels too good to be true. Mikoto giggles at the little girls’ caution and reaches over the table to pat their heads, “You must understand now why I had your mother leave the room. Fine. If you truly must give me something back, then all I ask from both of you is your loyalty.” Maki furrows her eyebrows, “Loyalty?” Mikoto nods, “Yes. All I ask from you two, is that when the time comes you will be loyal to my son and stand by his side, especially when he becomes clan head.”

Maki’s mind races and she begins to nod her head in agreement to Mikoto’s request. It’s not a hard decision for her to make. This clan sucks and Megumi is an Uchiha. She’s only a child so it’s not like her loyalty will do any good. Loyalty towards this clan will only have her end up like her cowardly mother, who abandons her daughters. Maki turns to Mai and sees that her twin is trembling and looking down, and she reaches to grab her hand. “Mai? Mai…please take this.”

Mai knows that her sister is staring at her and looks into the same green eyes she sees in the mirror everyday. The pleading in Maki’s eyes is clear, and she squeezes the small hand in hers. Mai’s heart begins to race and at that moment she feels a glimmer of uncertain hope and can feel her future changing. She makes the selfish decision, that no doubt Naobito-sama and her father and mother would disapprove of and nods, deciding to trust her future into the Uchiha woman’s hands. She looks up and is stunned because Mikoto gives her a breath-taking smile. She is genuinely happy and she is so beautiful, that it makes Mai and her sister smile, even though heart is racing and her palms are sweating. In the back of her mind, for some reason, Mai feels like she just made a deal with the devil. A beautiful devil with a mother’s gentle smile and deep, dark, bottomless eyes.

Mikoto and Toji knew right away that when Megumi manifested the Ten Shadows technique that the Zenin clan would approach them sooner or later. Her son was born with immense cursed energy and as he grew, it was only a matter before something would have happened. Toji in his brute force mindset, believes that they can simply fight the Zenin clan and the Jujustu world off together. She doesn’t necessarily mind and knows that if pushed she will burn down the petty and conservative elders ruling jujustu society any day, if it means protecting their family. It is the Six Eyes that worries her. She wonders if encountering him is what it feels like to meet Uchiha Madara or Senju Hashirama in their prime on the battlefield.

Gojo Satoru not only has the power and cursed energy to end their little family and dominate jujustu society, but also has the political power and name to flaunt around and make moves that no one else can. After the Star Plasma Vessel incident and leaving the country for a couple of years on the run, Gojo has finally calmed down and called off the hunt for Toji. Mikoto’s paranoid mind still refuses to rest and she knows how flippant his personality can be. Apparently he has taken the role of teacher at Jujustu High School and it is something that she keeps close eyes on for future opportunities. This child king is not actively hunting them down anymore but that does not make him their ally, no one who is not Uchiha can be their true ally here.

There is one trump card she is keeping an eye on but she must be careful on how to approach him and the consequences that come from using him. He is also still too young but she knows potential when she sees it.

Hence the Zenin clan.

The Zenin clan is one of the three major clans that dominate Jujustu society and modern day Japan. Just their name allows opportunities and doors to open up that could not even be imagined to the common person. The clan has existed for almost a thousand years, since the Heian era and have continued to survive and thrive after the King of Curses. The Gojo clan currently have the strongest sorcerer and techniques in modern history. The Kamo clan have the claim of history and respect for being the oldest, thriving clan. The Zenin clan have the largest group of sorcerers and physical manpower available.

Megumi has power but he is a mere child with no sharingan and will not reach his full potential until he is grown and the same could be said about the rest of their children. Toji who possess the prowess and power she has never seen before, has fought Gojo and actually helped his growth and unlocked his full power. And Mikoto….Mikoto…. is simply not Uchiha Madara or Senju Hashirama. She doesn’t even have the sealing prowess of Uzumaki Mito nor is she a Sannin nor is she a genius like Hatake Kakashi.

But she is an Uchiha and a mother.

She will win.

She cannot afford to lose again.

This world is softer and there is different expectations about child rearing and practices in Jujustu society and civilian society, that nothing can really compare to the depravity that the Elemental Nations offered. Seeing how the Six Eyes and his companion cursed user reacted to the death of the Star Vessel and the general dismay of Toji as the “Sorcerer Killer”, death and assassinations is clearly looked down upon, at least in public. She compares her teenage experiences in Konohagakure to Toji’s life in the Zenin clan and despite the emotional and physical abuse by his own blood, it is still jarring to realize that she was a solider in war while he lived life in a compound when they were the same age. It makes her feel older and younger at the same time, the same melancholic way she feels, when she thinks about whether she is truly happy that she does not live in the Elemental Nations anymore.

She thinks that she’s more honest to her family in this world and tries to find a balance of parenting and shinobi life here, that she never got to experience in the Elemental Nations. She tries not to play housewife and simpering mother to her children like she did with Sasuke, but she knows being distant and raising them as pure shinobi children like she did with Itachi is wrong as well. Megumi favours her but it is not because Toji is absent or busy working and she is his only source of parental affection, it is simply because Toji likes to annoy their son and she’s the only one in the house that actually went to school. Megumi knows that her hands are covered in blood and that she takes the same illegal jobs that Toji does, but he’s also seen both of his parents tuck him in at night and play games with him. Her son knows she is not a good person that is to be held in the same moral standings that civilian or Jujustu society holds people to, but he still loves her and it fills her heart with joy.

Toji is clumsy and brash as a first time parent but despite his upbringing, he really does try and she can see the love in his eyes whenever he holds their children. He has been a good husband to her, the years of working together as partners for missions has paid off, and he has become a pillar in her life. They both take turns taking jobs but are less active now and it’s nice to come home to a clean house and dinner on the table. They both understand that they need to be there for their children and give them the childhood that they never got to experience, but cannot fully walk away from the violence and blood that has been engrained in their bones. She has a partner and friend again and it soothes the loneliness and grief she feels, whenever she thinks about her clan. They still argue and get into fights, it is inevitable with Toji’s mechanisms of shutting down and her temper. She still holds on to the fury and grudge of the Gojo incident but what is done is done, and she must plan for what is next. She has a duty to her husband and family first, and Mikoto has always been a dutiful daughter.

Fugaku was clan head and Chief of the Police Force, and as the years went by, her resentment of leaving active duty and becoming the household’s primary caretaker lessened by the time she had Sasuke, but it was always in the corner of her mind. The consistent whispers and thoughts, that she should have been Clan Head and that Fugaku is better with the children than she is. In this new life, it is different. Toji is not clan head and she is not the Jinnchuruki’s bodyguard. They did not have an arranged marriage and excluding Megumi, they had children simply because they wanted to. It makes her want to smile and cry at the same time. She remembers missing Fugaku even in Konoha and would sit in the living room of their large home folding laundry, picturing what life could be like if they were simply husband and wife and not Clan Head and Wife of the scrutinized Uchiha Clan.

It is a careful balancing act of being mother and shinobi, and despite how this is her second life, she still worries about whether she is truly meant to be a parent or not, always second guessing herself about whether she is a good mother. It is still jarring for her to decapitate someone with her sword and then come home to help her son with his math homework. As much as she didn’t like stepping back from active duty and retiring to housewife position, she understands why it probably was for the best, for the children and for herself. It feels like double vision and a curse in it of itself, consistently dealing with the worst humanity can offer and then kissing her husband and children in thanks for dinner. She hasn’t dealt with this since before she married Fugaku, coming home from anbu missions where she killed newborns and then spending time holding her nieces and nephews and talking with her little brother.

But Mikoto is selfish. Uchiha are not meant to be alone and after knowing and living, the joy and warmth motherhood and clan can bring her, she cannot let it go. Her eyes will never let her forget those memories. She will always mourn the fact that she will never be able to do these things for Sasuke.

She does realizes that she has been subconsciously raising Megumi to meet the standards of the Uchiha main family, engraining language and music lessons after school and teaching him proper etiquette and manners. It’s so natural to her, with her family’s high status within the clan and later, marrying into the main family for children to learn these things. Just like it is natural to her to start training him to throw shuriken and how to control his cursed energy at the age of six. Toji looks at her odd sometimes because his own clan forced him to learn these things, and he knows she was born in a traditional civilian family for the most part. Just in case, she asks Megumi if he feels overwhelmed but her dutiful son simply replies that he likes the different translated books and music lessons, but thinks that etiquette is dumb and boring. Mikoto agrees but tells him that it’ll be important one day, and that it never hurts to have proper manners before ruffling his dark locks and giving him a kiss on the forehead. You can get away with a lot if you’re polite. People tend to react differently when faced with manners and perceived kindness.

Like her, Megumi is caught between two worlds especially amongst the Zenin clan. He will be a wild card to them and the rest of Jujustu society, an heir and holder of the Ten Shadows technique but raised with affection and freedom and lack of stifling expectations of clan born duty and blood. Mikoto will raise Megumi with love and care, but she will also raise him to be strong and have the upmost duty and loyalty to their family. Duty is love and love is what the Uchiha are.

Shinobi will take all the cards life have dealt them and will squeeze every last drop if it means survival. Shinobi will steal the cards from others and squeeze and twist them until it they are so warped they are unrecognizable and turn it into their own. The Zenin clan is simply just another card and with a shinobi mother, she will raise Megumi and her children with Toji to be strong and capable of squeezing and making the cards their own. Megumi is already a kind boy and a good older brother to his siblings as he is incredibly patient and smart even if he’s grumpy. As a mother, Mikoto is rejoiced and her heart feels full every time she sees him and Toji spending time together, but as a shinobi she also needs him to be selfish and pragmatic.

The world is cruel. That is true about any world. But I need you to be crueler. I need you to survive. My sweet grumpy blessing. I need you to be strong.

She doesn’t think she could handle it if her children are ripped away from her again.

Uchiha Megumi is the son of Uchiha Mikoto.

He is the direct descendent of Uchiha Madara’s line. He is a descendent of Indra Otsutsuki. He is a son of Amaterasu. He is the son of Uchiha Toji. He holds the legendary Ten Shadows technique of the Zenin clan.

My son will be the head of the Zenin clan.

Uchiha Mikoto is a shinobi. She has learned from her mistakes of her past life including the failed coup that led to her entire world burning down. She lived and bled for years in a village that despised her people and took away everyone she loved. She is also a woman and a mother and the wife of the clan head, so she can play the long game. In the game of lives and traitors and hypocrites, she will manipulate and kill and lie with a simple smile on her face and demure bow. She knows she must set the pieces and create the right environment. She cannot be too hasty nor be too late. Her family is at stake, she cannot afford it.

The greedy Zenin clan who hurt her husband and hate her for simply existing as a woman, while seeking to steal her son. The elders council who manipulate Jujustu society and plant assassins for every minor inconvenience or outlier who do not follow the rules of their world. Gojo Satoru who forces everyone to dance to his tune and power and forced her family into hiding. They are all hypocrites and cards to her, pieces on the game board, and she will use them all for her family.

In this world, she’s heard the statement that love is the most twisted curse there is. In a way she agrees as she feels the rage and paranoia in her heart, every time she thinks about the uncertainty of her family’s future and the downfall of her clan. The love of an Uchiha would burn the world down and Mikoto is pure Uchiha. Our love is a blessing and a curse.

She will have Megumi take over that wretched clan and see her family survive and grow old if that is the last thing she ever does.

She curses it into her heart.

Chapter Text

Uchiha Megumi is a third year middle school student at Saitama Urami East Junior High. He has his earphones in, listening to Sheena Ringo Shun and walking around the crowded hallways towards the exit after the bell rang, ignoring the smell of body spray and sweat from the other students when someone bumps into his shoulder. Usually he would ignore it and move on but he looks up and sees a group of students in his grade beginning to crowd around him and feels an arm slinging across his shoulders. Fucking hell. Now?

“Hey Uchiha!” Ugly number one, the guy right in front of him starts. Megumi can’t contain his eye roll and pauses his music, wrapping his headphones around his phone and pocketing it, waiting for inevitable fight that is about to begin. He turns to the leader of this circus and looks at him with a bored expression. “What.”

Ugly number two, the one with his arm slinged across his shoulder to his left, chuckles, “We heard that you’re going around thinking you’re tough shit. So us and a couple of our buddies, just wanted to check if you think that’s right. Why don’t we prove it huh, pretty boy?” Pretty boy? Do you want to kiss me or fight me? Considering how his face is way too close to him and how the arm around his shoulders tighten, Megumi thinks that it’s both.

Megumi is annoyed and just wants to go home and practice the guitar. He’s so close to completing Arctic Monkeys 505, and he knows that his youngest brother Kousei, wants to watch a nature documentary and play with his Divine Dogs. He should just cast a genjustu to make these assholes let him leave, but he’s still in school and he’s not super great at casting wide scape illusions. It’s easier with the sharingan, as opposed to when he was a kid and tried, but even his mom says he will probably never be a master at it and simply encourages him to be proficient enough in a fight and when he wants to get away from people.

“Lets just go outside and do this.” Megumi sighs out and resigns himself to fighting, and the lecture that is going to come when his teacher calls his parents about this. His dad, Uchiha Toji is just gonna laugh and berate him if he finds a bruise on him and Megumi can already hear what he’s going to say, “You actually let those losers land a hit on you? Thought I raised you better.” Megumi is going to roll his eyes and scowl at his annoying old man, but it is his mom finding out that actually worries him.

Megumi learned from a very young age that his parents weren’t normal. Most dads don’t laugh at their kids for getting into fights and encourage them to win. Even when visiting the Zenin compound, he knows that his dad is giving a wide berth for his presence, probably because he’s a known criminal amongst the jujutsu world. What always fascinates him though is his mom and how everyone thinks that she’s the normal one in their family. Most moms don’t come home in the middle of the night through second story windows, covered in blood with a sword in their hand.

That’s exactly what happened when he was eight and he started sobbing thinking his mom was hurt, like how his dad sometimes comes home. His mom just simply laughed and bent down to kiss his head and said, “It’s alright Gumi-chan. It’s not my blood.” His dad come out of their room and smirked, leaning against the doorframe, “And you always nag me about not bringing blood on the floor. Oi brat, relax you’ll wake up the twins. Let mama clean up and I’ll read you a bedtime story.” Mom rolled her eyes and gave him a gentle smile, while his dad picked him up and brought him to his bedroom, and she came to join them halfway through the story. She snuggled next to him and allowed eight year old Megumi to inspect her for any injuries. “See Gumi, mom is alright. You should have more confidence in me.” She pouted and Megumi said, “But why were you all bloody? Who’s blood is it?” His mother lightly hummed and started running her fingers through his hair, “No one important my little blessing. Mommy just sometimes does the same jobs that Daddy does. I’m sorry for scaring you in the hallway.” Megumi felt himself close his eyes and sleep begin to takeover, as he held his mother tightly, “It’s okay mommy. I’m glad you’re safe.”

Uchiha Megumi knows his parents aren’t normal. He knows that they’re both assassins who fell in love and started a family and it’s so ridiculous that he feels like he’s in a plot of a movie or book, but no, it is just his real life. Even the Zenin clan doesn’t know and his opinions on their intelligence gathering skills goes lower and lower every year, as he grows older and realizes that fucking Naobito still thinks his mom is just a housewife. He thinks Maki and Mai are suspicious of her, but he also thinks, they just think that she’s a rich civilian who can see cursed spirits and learned fighting skills from his dad. It makes him want to scream and tear his hair out. The only one he can fully rant to and understand what he deals with is his cousin Yuta, but even he has fully accepted that this is just their life and how his parents act. Considering how Yuta acts like his mom is a goddess for taming Rika and teaching him how to control her, Megumi doesn’t really think that he’s the most unbiased when it comes to judge of character.

While Uchiha Toji laughs and berates him for getting into fights, Uchiha Mikoto simply looks at him with a disappointed look in her eyes, “You are an Uchiha, Gumi-chan. Fighting is not a good look. How could you get caught by your teacher so easily?” His mom isn’t actually mad that he beats people up or gets in trouble, she’s upset that he gets caught doing it.

She sighs and looks his in the eyes, “You couldn’t even use a genjutsu on your teacher or something? Now I have to go to a meeting with your principal on Friday?” Megumi’s school fights reduced greatly after that one meeting. Not because he actually stopped because it’s always the other kids who start it and his dad always said not to be a pushover, but he quickly learned to not get caught. The humiliation of watching his mother flirt with the parents of the kids who lost to him and the principal is scarred into his mind, and he never wants to see it happen again.

When he moved to junior high and first got into trouble and called into the principal’s office, he had brace himself to witness his mom flirt again and was genuinely surprised that it didn’t work because the principal is surprisingly loyal to his wife and was firm in his punishment. He got suspended for a week that day and his mom walked out with a thoughtful expression on her face. Uchiha Mikoto is a stubborn and prideful woman, and Megumi at age twelve, realized once again, that she is just as insane and moral deprived as his dad and maybe even worse.

Megumi remembers being halfway through his first year of junior high and walking downstairs to see his mother dressed up and ready for a meeting with his principal. The twins, Haruki and Sayuri, and Yuta are already at the table, and his dad is making sure Kousei is eating all his vegetables, when he turns to see him walk into the dining room and starts to laugh. “What?” he says suspiciously, at his annoying old man. “Nothing. Your mom is insane.” He smirks into his cup of tea, and mom rolls her eyes and smiles before she turns to Megumi. “Good morning Gumi. Eat up. We have to drop the kids off and then go to your school.”

It is when they are in the foyer and almost out the door, when he notices the briefcase that his mom is carrying along with her purse. “What’s that mom?” She pauses her application of lipstick and her lip twitches upwards, “Just a little something to persuade your principal. I always told you that being polite and being a good host, can make a big difference in how people treat you Gumi-chan. Remember that too Yu-chan.” For some reason Megumi isn’t convinced and thinks that his mom has a gun in the bag, but he shakes the thought out of his head. Mom isn’t that obvious, she would at least try poison and guns aren’t her style. Now he’s stressed because his mom is planning to kill his principal just because he’s fighting at school. It doesn’t help that his dad starts laughing again, as he packs Kousei’s bag for kindergarten and helps him put on his shoes.

Uchiha Megumi regrets his naive thoughts of that morning breakfast and the walk to school. It was much worse. He should’ve known from the fact that Toji was also planning to come to the meeting. Both of his parents being present at anything school related was a recipe for disaster, considering his dad lives to embarrass his kids and his mom loves to subtly revel in chaos. He tries to silently communicate his suspicion to Yuta, but he just shrugs and Megumi realizes that he also has no clue why his dad is coming to the meeting. The whole Uchiha family drops Kousei at kindergarten, and move down the block to drop off Haruki and Sayuri at the elementary school. When they finally reach the junior high, Yuta waves goodbye and says he’ll meet Megumi at lunch with their friend, Tsumiki before heading to his classroom. Megumi ignores how his dad scares the secretary with his large frame and scowling face, and they are quickly moved to the principal’s office, where the man stands and does a double take at Toji’s presence and Mikoto’s smiling face standing beside him.

Is this her plan? Use dad as a scary attack dog? Is dad here to clean up the body? It’s worked before with his previous teachers, but as he looks up at his father, he sees that there’s nothing but amusement in his sharp eyes. Why is he so excited? Is this some sort of weird foreplay for them? Mom decides to take the wheel and bows at the man pointedly looking at Megumi and Toji to follow along and bow back, and the principal quickly regains his senses and returns the bow before sitting down behind the large wooden desk. The family of three sit down with his mom in the middle staring right in front of the principal, and she starts the conversation. “Nishimoto-sensei. How are you? I don’t know if you remember me, but I am Uchiha Mikoto. I believe this is the first time, you’ve met my husband and Megumi-kun’s father, Uchiha Toji.”

Nishimoto stares at Toji’s long, stretched out crossed legs and his arms draped behind the back of the chair and his bored expression. “Hey” His dad grunts out and gives the man a nod of acknowledgement, and Megumi wants to slap his hand on his forehead because of course his old man takes nothing seriously. This is why mom comes to all these meetings. Nishimoto coughs and says, “O-of course I remember you Uchiha-san. I am doing well thank you for asking.” He seems to regain his bearings and straightens his back, and Megumi cringes, when he tries to make his voice deeper. “It is sad that we have to meet again to discuss your son’s behaviour though. This is very serious and I’m afraid that we must discuss expulsion.”

His dad snorts quietly, and he turns to glare at him because what the hell. He knows he’s gotten in trouble a lot, but those shitty third years fucking deserved getting punched in the face for cornering that girl and making her pull up her skirt. Megumi even saw that they were taking out their phones so he jumped in and fought all of them, and smashed their phones just in case. Now he’s getting expelled for this shit and not the sexual assaulters? He feels his eyes start to pulse and he knows that he has to reign in his emotions, unless he wants his civilian principal wondering why he has red eyes. It feels like his mom can sense it, and she moves to put her hand on his arm and gently squeezes it.

Mom widens her eyes and she gasps while putting a hand to her mouth in shock. “Oh no! Nishimoto-sensei what happened?” Nishimoto looks smug as he repeats what Megumi did, albeit, an edited and exaggerated version that completely ignores why he fought them. “I’m sure you know that Uchiha-kun is a repeat offender. I’ve contacted his past teachers and found out that this kind of behaviour has been going on for far too long. The school is demanding for expulsion and the victims are possibly pressing charges for assault, and financial reparations for their destroyed things.” What the actual fuck. Megumi is not paying for their shitty phones and the girl should be the one charging those assholes for assault.

Mom’s eyes fill with tears and she moves closer to Nishimoto. “Nishimoto-sensei, that doesn’t sound like my son at all! There must be a reason for him to fight those boys!” The shitty principal knows that there is, Megumi fucking told him. Yuta and Tsumiki know why. Mom and dad also know why he fought those assholes, but instead Nishimoto looks in his mother’s tearful eyes and says, “Not any substantial reason. And other than the victims, no one has come forward either other than to say your son should be out of school and in jail.” Mom moves forward to slightly bow her head, “Please Nishimoto-sensei there must be some other way to rectify this situation other than expulsion.” Nishimoto looks fucking smug at his mother’s bowed head and Megumi feels enraged, and he turns to see his dad is also scowling but still not saying a word, which is unlike him. “I’m sorry Uchiha-san but this is the only solution.”

Mom is still looking down and slightly fidgets with her fingers when she says, “Is this truly your own, sole decision Nishimoto-sensei?” Nishimoto remains firm and lightly clicks his teeth with his tongue, “It is Uchiha-san. This is my own decision after hearing the mass complaints from his victims.” Mom hums, “I see. And it has absolutely, nothing to do with the fact that you’re sleeping with the father of one of Megumi’s apparent victims?” Nishimoto’s mouth drops open and his face begins to turn stark white, and Megumi can’t blame him because his eyes widen as well. What the actual fuck did mom say?

“Wh-what was that Uchiha-san?” Nishimoto stutters outs. Mom lifts her head up and Megumi sees that her tears are completely gone and her mouth has a smile on that is too sharp to be polite. Oh. She’s pissed and means business now. She opens up the briefcase that is on the floor, and drops down a pile of photos. Megumi moves forward and he can see that the photos are snapshots of Nishimoto exiting a black car and a man following after him. All the photos consist of Nishimoto and the same man side by side, the most alarming being them exiting a hotel together at night, and the photo closest to him, is a snapshot of them kissing in an alleyway. Holy shit.

Megumi turns to the side to see his dad with his phone out fucking recording, and poorly holding back his laughter with his hand. This is why he wanted to come?! Nishimoto face turns paler and Megumi sees a bead of sweat drip down his forehead, as he looks at all the photos of his affair laid out on his desk. Mom says in a soft voice, “I’ll ask once again, if you are absolutely sure that this is your sole decision, Nishimoto-sensei. I don’t think your wife is aware of your decision nor do I Takumi-kun and his mother are aware of your decision. I also don’t think that the education superintendent and Takumi-san’s board of directors are aware either. Nevertheless, I’m sure we can find a way to rectify your decision about Megumi.” Nishimoto face is rapidly changing colours from stark white to bright red, before he quietly stutters out, “O-o-of course we can U-Uchiha-san.” Mom’s grin grows sharper and dad actually laughs out loud not bothering to hold it in anymore.

For the next fifteen minutes, Uchiha Megumi watches his mother blackmail his principal into letting him stay in school. It is safe to say that Megumi is not getting expelled from school, and he’s pretty sure, that he could do anything now and the principal won’t say a word to him. When mom mentioned that she was thirsty Nishimoto actually got the secretary to bring them tea and snacks, and now Megumi has cookies in his pocket and the three Uchihas leave the office of a stuttering and bowing junior high principal. Mom has a smirk on her face and is fanning herself with her stack of blackmail. Dad is laughing and is rewatching his video of the meeting. And Megumi is feeling like the past twenty minutes have been a fever dream considering he walked into the meeting with the very real possibility of expulsion, and is now walking out with a completely spotless record and the cursed knowledge that his principal is having an affair with his classmate’s dad.

They begin to walk towards the school gates for his parents to leave and Megumi still needs to go to class. If he wasn’t such a smug asshole who’s cheating on his wife, Megumi would actually feel bad for him. He kinda does feel bad for him especially when the man started crying and begging at mom’s feet. He’s shaken out of his thoughts when he hears his dad cackle and a hand on his head, ruffling his hair. “I told you your mom is crazy.” He shakes his dad off before turning to his mom, “Mom. What the hell? When did you do all this?”

Mom raises her eyebrows, “Gumi. Language” Megumi looks at her in disbelief and dad cackles again, “Babe, he just watched you blackmail his principal. For some reason the kid is in shock like he’s never seen you work before. Give him a break.” Mom rolls her eyes but doesn’t answer his questions, “Still. It’s not proper Gumi. You know I don’t like that sort of language in front of me.” Megumi is exasperated, “Mom! Please.” She hums and starts to grin, “After our first meeting, I noticed that my…usual way of dealing with people didn’t work. I thought that was a little odd so I started to investigate and inadvertently I found myself a goldmine.”

Megumi feels like he’s having an out of body experience as his mind recounts, the last time his mother and principal had a meeting and he starts to connect the dots. God fucking damn it he did not want to connect those dots. “You mean to tell me…when you flirted with Nishimoto and it didn’t work, you automatically assumed he was gay?” Dad starts laughing again and mom has the audacity to look aghast. “Megumi don’t say it like that. Toji stop laughing!” She moves to hit him on the chest and his dad cackles out, “It’s true though. MIko just admit that you got hurt that you couldn’t seduce someone” Mom huffs and Megumi can see the twitch in the corner of her mouth. Oh god. His mom actually did get hurt that someone didn’t respond to her flirting. So much so that she resorted to finding out why and landed on a shit ton of blackmail material, just because a man isn’t attracted to a married woman.

“You make me sound so vain Toji. Maybe he does truly love his wife, I would’ve found something on him eventually. This was just the most entertaining and obvious, and I couldn’t just do nothing with this information. Especially since he’s threatening to kick out our son!” His mom is crazy. Megumi already knew this but having it be reminded in front of him, makes him want to scream into a pillow. Megumi and his dad both know that mom could’ve easily used genjustu on the principal to make him reverse his decision. Mom knows they know. But instead she resorted to finding blackmail and make a man cry in front of her teenage son and husband simply because it’s more entertaining this way.

Dad moves to wrap his arm around mom’s neck and kisses her on the cheek, while giggling “Of course you couldn’t not share the information to the class, Miko. He really is a dick to Gumi, and it’s always hot to watch you work.” She smiles and turns her head to return the kiss and Megumi has to look away in disgust because he sees tongue come out. “Mom! Dad! We’re still in public!” They pull away and at least mom has the gall to look slightly embarrassed but she’s still holding on to dad’s arm, while dad just looks fucking smug. The old man rolls his eyes, “You should be thanking your mom for saving your ass, brat. And grateful that your parents love each other enough that we’re not having affairs.” God forbid a kid doesn’t want to see his parents make out.

They finally reach the gates outside of school and at this point, Megumi just wants his parents to leave so he can head to class and try to forget that this morning has ever happened. It’s going to be so hard to face Takumi-kun and not say anything, if the asshole tries something with him again. He scowls at his dad but his face softens when he faces his mother, “Thank you mom. I’m sorry for making you come here.” Mom smiles brightly and she giggles, “You did the right thing fighting those boys Gumi. You’re our son, of course we’ll always be on your side. Just try not to get caught again, or at least try to find some good blackmail on them. I know your sister would be glad to help you.” His face flushes and he nods because he does know. His mom is crazy and his dad is annoying and they make him feel like he’s growing grey hairs at the age of thirteen, but he has never doubted their love for him.

Megumi thinks about his parents and the infamous meeting with his principal, as he sits on top of the pile of bodies under him in the courtyard of the school. He steps down and ignores the groaning under him, as he picks up his school bag and starts the walk back home. The principal knows not to say anything to him and his teachers gave up calling his parents during his second year, when Nishimoto actually stopped them so he won’t receive any formal punishment on his record. It’s more on the fact that, he feels the stares as he passes through after fighting a group of guys in front of the entire school. It’s too public and he knows that his mom is going to notice that he got into a fight again, and she’ll ask if he got caught or not.

He puts back on his earphones and searches his playlist to find a song, and relaxes as the deep strung of guitar from Tame Impala Elephant, reaches his ears. Megumi won’t say it out loud, but as he slowly makes his way way, he can’t help but miss Yuta and Tsumiki and their light chatter that followed him home everyday.

Yoshikawa Tsumiki is a girl with brown hair and brown eyes, who lived in their neighbourhood and went to the same school as him and Yuta. She’s actually in Yuta’s grade and was supposed to attend the local high school, but she fell into a coma last year. Her mom is a pretty shitty parent, who likes to leave her only daughter alone at home, so she came over a lot to help babysit his siblings and play with him and Yuta. Tsumiki is a genuinely kind and caring person, and he misses hearing her gossip about her classmates and teachers during lunch break. He misses buying ice cream with her and Yuta after school, and going to his room to watch music videos together. He misses his friend and knows that she didn’t deserve to fall into a coma after eating that fucking cursed object.

Megumi remembers visiting her in the hospital with Yuta and his mom to leave flowers and talk to her. He’s been to the hospital before when the twins and Kousei were born, but he didn’t remember it feeling this bleak and sterile, until he went to see Tsumiki lying on the white sheets looking like she is peacefully sleeping. She does not wake up and hasn’t even twitched for almost an entire year now, and Megumi can’t help but feel sad and helpless every time he thinks about her. His mom was acting strangely when they entered the room, and after they put the flowers on the table next to her bed, Megumi and Yuta watched her stare at Tsumiki as they quietly spoke to her about their day at school.

When a lull came to their conversation Megumi and Yuta watched his mom stand, and look over Tsumiki’s body with her sharingan. “Yu-chan please close the door. Gumi-chan turn on your sharingan” she spoke quietly but there was a command in her tone, and Yuta got up to close the door. Once it was closed, Megumi turned on his sharingan and felt his perception of the world change, as his eyes turned red and the two tomoe of his eyes began to spin. The world became red and everything became clearer and somehow slower at the same time. He could see Yuta’s heart pulse in his neck, and the huge amount of cursed energy he had in his body from across the room. He could see every single speck of dust on the ceiling fan and count them. He met his mother’s matching red eyes and she tilted her chin one millimeter towards Tsumiki, and he turned his head to face her sleeping body when he saw it.

A bright pulsing ball of cursed energy resting in the pit of her stomach. Megumi’s mouth dropped and he stared harder because he knows what cursed energy looks like in a civilian. It looks like a moving, slimy pit in civilians that leaked outwards. This was not Tsumiki’s cursed energy. The thing in her stomach was an unmoving object that her cursed energy seemed to move around and slightly absorbed into. Megumi turns off his sharingan and looks at his mom. “Megumi what did you see?” Yuta touches his shoulder and asks. He scrunches his eyebrows in thought, trying to explain what is in Tsumiki. “It’s..it’s like a ball. There’s…there’s something in her and it’s forcing her to sleep.” Yuta looks shocked and turns his head to look at Tsumiki and then at mom.

Mom finally speaks, “Something or someone cursed her. She ate a cursed object and I think it’s messing up her body’s ability to regulate itself. Hence why she’s in a coma.” Yuta quietly asks, “Can we take it out? You can make something that takes it out, right auntie?” Mom looks slightly sad and thoughtful as she stares at Tsumiki’s body again, “I have to make a plan and talk to people. This object isn’t just sitting in her, it’s actively embedding itself into her cursed energy. If I’m not careful I could accidentally kill her.” Megumi and Yuta both flinch at this and continue to stare at Tsumiki hoping she’ll wake up soon.

Mom isn’t able to take the cursed object out of Tsumiki. She reached out to some of her and dad’s contacts and even called Shiu-ojisan for help, but no one was able to help. The only useful person was an old jujustu healer, who confirmed what mom thought and said only the person who cursed her can release her from her coma. Apparently the object is like a parasite and it’s goal is to takeover the host. Even if dad used his Split Soul Katana or mom made some cursed pliers, they would just kill Tsumiki since the object is so embedded into her cursed energy and soul. Her coma was one of the main reasons why Yuta enrolled into Jujustu High in Tokyo.

Yuta wanted to enroll and find the person who cursed Tsumiki and force them to release her. Dad said that Jujustu High had more resources than them, especially after Megumi used his Zenin clan privileges and raided their libraries only to find nothing. Gojo Satoru is their only resource left at tracking down the person who cursed Tsumiki. Mom also encouraged Yuta to enroll because it would let him gain more experience as a sorcerer, and that it was better politically too. Yuta is in the same class as Maki right now; and Megumi can’t help but feel jealous that they get to hang out and train all the time together. Yuta is strong with his massive cursed energy reserves and Rika as his partner, and he knows from Maki’s texts he’s gotten stronger despite the subpar training from Gojo Satoru, the Six Eyes.

Gojo Satoru, the wielder of the Six Eyes. Megumi is not dumb and knows about him and his history with his family. He knows Gojo is considered the strongest sorcerer of modern history and that his dad killed him and they were forced out of the country for a couple of years because of him. His dad hates him purely because of his natural bias against all sorcerers who don’t live in the same house as him, which basically only consists of Megumi and Yuta and Maki and Mai when they visit. Dad will never deny an opportunity to talk shit about Gojo and it’s weird because it usually ranges from saying how he sliced the Six Eyes like Kobe beef, to saying how Gojo almost ripped him open. It’s a strange relationship consisting of reluctant respect and acknowledgment and intense hatred.

His mom…his mom is strange when it comes to Gojo. Megumi knows his mother. He knows that she is kind and gentle with him and his siblings, always ready to kiss them on the forehead or play a song on the piano for them. He also knows that she knows how to fight and is talented at cursed energy and is unafraid of blood. She has the sharingan and it was from her blood at he and his siblings have it too. That’s why he knows that his mother is an emotional person. She hides it well but when it comes to all things surrounding jujustu society and Gojo Satoru, he can see the anger in her body. There is no respect from her that even has dad can give him. There is only pure spite and hatred and anger in her.

That spite and anger comes through whenever she is visiting the Zenin compound with him to supervise his training sessions, and she plays the demure housewife made to bow her head and serve tea to the men that laugh and gaze at her with disgusting eyes. That spite and anger comes through when she told Yuta that he would be a target from the Elder’s Council, and that he should enroll in Jujustu High to gain protection because they would be considered a powerful neutral party who can vouch for him. That spite and anger comes through when she glares at his dad for mentioning Gojo Satoru and their years on the run from him.

His mom is an angry and prideful woman and she hides it extremely well. She hates everything and all the rules and obligations that come from jujustu society, but Megumi knows that she loves her family more. He knows that it is because of her family that she hates jujustu society. The Uchiha clan is a clan of love.

Megumi knows that next year he’ll be going to Jujustu high too, and he already feels nervous and scared about his interactions with Gojo. He’s not scared about actually getting in and completing the application forms because he knows that his mom will just do the same thing she did with Yuta, aka find a random sorcerer and genjutsu them to vouch for him, and then force said sorcerer, to leave the country so no one can interrogate them on how they found him. He’s nervous about Gojo interacting with him and taking out his anger and hatred of his dad on him. Megumi knows that Gojo called off the hunt for his dad’s head when he found out the Star Plasma Vessel was in a coma and not dead, and that they’re on neutral, icy terms now. Considering how his dad likes to talk shit, he wouldn’t be surprised if Gojo also spews his hatred for his father freely. He’s nervous about interacting with Gojo and not hating him like his mom does. Megumi in a way, feels like he’s betraying his family even though he knows that his parents are encouraging him to enroll.

Uchiha Megumi makes his way home and unlocks the front door, “Tadaima,” he shouts as he takes off his shoes. “Gumi-nii!” his ten year old brother Haruki, comes running into his leg to give him a hug. “Oof. Relax Haru,” Megumi chuckles and pats his brother’s head, gently running his fingers through Haruki’s chin length hair. Haruki simply laughs and lets go of his leg, “Sorry Gumi-nii but you took too long to come home. The demon spawn is waiting for you in the living room” Megumi gives his cheeky younger brother a stern look, “Don’t take about Kousei like that. He’s an angel.” Haruki’s onyx eyes are full of disbelief and he scoffs, “Maybe to you but he’s a little monster to everyone else. Don’t let those big eyes fool you nii-san, he’s a demon. Even Dad calls him a brat.” Megumi laughs and walks down the hallway, “The old man thinks all of us are brats except Sayuri. Where is she anyways?”

Haruki hums, “Mom sent Dad out for groceries and Sayuri decided to join. No doubt she’s making puppy eyes, so the old man buys her ice cream.” Megumi chuckles, “Mom is gonna be mad at them for ruining dinner.” Haruki just shrugs, “Better them than us.” They enter the living room and Megumi sees his youngest brother, four year old Kousei, hanging off of the couch upside down. “Gumi-nii!” the young boy flips himself backwards off the couch and turns to run to give him a hug. Megumi was already halfway across the room to catch him when he realized what Kousei was planning to do, but instead meets him closer to hug him and gently scold the boy, as he looks him over. “Kou be careful!”

His bratty four year old brother juts out his lip in a pout and widens his eyes in innocence, “I was careful Nii-san! I missed you. You took too long.” Megumi feels his need to scold him waver as he pulls Kousei into another hug. From his side he hears Haruki sigh in resignation, “He caught you in his trap Nii-san.” Kousei pulls himself out of Megumi’s arms and all innocence is gone, as his green eyes shine bright in defiance, “Don’t you have homework to do Haru-nii?” Haruki snorts and Megumi knows that an argument is going to break out soon, when he hears a high pitched voice come into the living room. “Boys be nice.”

His mom, Uchiha Mikoto, enters the living room with silent footsteps and a gentle smile, as she turns to face him. “Tadaima, mom.” Her smile broadens, “Okaerinasai, Gumi-chan.”

Chapter Text

This man is dangerous.

Said man is tall, broad shouldered, with dark hair that frame his green eyes hidden with intelligence in them. He has a sharp jawline and a deep scar across the left corner of his lip. He is attractive and from the casual flounce of his posture and tilt of his head, he knows it too and that makes him even more alarming. What makes him truly dangerous and what makes Mikoto want to run a sword through his body just make sure he is real, is that she cannot sense him.

It is impossible. Mikoto is a sensor, not a long range one like Kushina or even the Yamanaka, but she was still a short ranged sensor capable of tracking and feeling all chakra signatures within an 300 meter radius. She could feel someone’s chakra and their nature, so intimately like it was her own, and find and track them like it was a sixth sense. That, with her sharingan and prowess for battle, made her an anbu agent at fifteen and a known shinobi during the Third War.

The Uchiha Clan have produced many sensors over the years, and she remembered sitting down and sipping tea with her grandmother, Uchiha Mizuki. The direct granddaughter of Uchiha Izuna, would say simply smile as she lit incense around the room, “Of course we are natural sensors. How else would be able to navigate the world so naturally without our eyes? We train our young to navigate the world without sight, but training can only go so far. Bloodline thievery is always a possibility with our blessing. That’s why we have the birds and the cats and our chakra to guide us through the world.”

Madara was a known rare, long range sensor capable of rivalling Senju Tobirama. Izuna’s line has always produced many short ranged sensors, and with the Senju line being almost extinct and Uzumaki scattered, sensors were rare in Konoha especially since the Kyuubi killing a large portion of their forces. She suspected that Sasuke was one too by how freely he felt and expressed his emotions, and how easily he always managed to find her and Itachi in that large house.

But when Mikoto enters the large, dark board room that Kong Shiu has arranged for her to meet in, her sharingan is instantly turned on when she comes face to face with the tall man sitting on a couch. This man has no cursed energy. Not a single drop. She can see it now, how his clothing and the air around him have cursed energy but he himself holds none, like he is nothing more than a physical ghost. It feels like she is staring into wind and only with her sharingan and honed sensing abilities, that she can feel that there is some sort of presence in the room with her and Shiu. What the fuck is wrong with him?

Mikoto has never met someone with no chakra before and in this world she has never seen someone with no cursed energy either. Her innate sensing abilities followed her into this new world like the Sharingan and fire did. She can feel all the cursed energy signatures in the entire block, and Shiu’s latent cursed energy reserves, but she cannot feel the man sitting in front of her. How is that even possible? How is he alive? Even from across the room and in low light, she catches the slight tilt of his head when she flashes her sharingan for a brief second, meaning he saw her eyes and she watches as his posture slightly tenses and the air within the room stiffens.

He holds himself like a shinobi. The casual posture and subtle but watchful eyes hidden with sharpness, no doubt ready to decapitate someone in a blink of an eye. He is watching her watch him and for the first time in her twenty-one years of this new life, she is fearful. She also can’t help the exhilaration racing through her body when she realizes that this man can actually kill her. He can actually give her a good fight without directly interacting with the Six Eyes child she’s heard rumours about.

Uchiha Mikoto does not believe in the notions of fate nor destiny that seem to intertwine itself so deeply in this new world. But she can feel it. She can feel that this man will be involved in her life someway or another. And for the first time in twenty one years she feels like she has been woken up, like a bucket of cold water has been splashed on her and she feels herself smile with teeth under her kitsune mask. Mikoto can see that the man feels the same because he is openly watching her now and in the ten seconds that they have been in the same room together, the air begins to stiffen and warm around them.

Kong Shiu breaks the tense air and coughs, gesturing his arm for Mikoto to sit down on the couch. Mikoto walks silently to the couch and sits on the opposite side, trying to ignore the fear racing in brain, at that fact that she is seeing a man on her left but still not able to feel him. “Kitsune-chan welcome. Meet Zenin Toji.” Zenin Toji. Mikoto starts to rack her brain for all the information that Shui just presented to her.

Zenin, one of the three big clans in the Jujustu world. Famed for the Ten Shadows Technique. Most members out of all the clans. Traditionalists like the rest of the elders council. The Zenin let a man use their name but still leave? No. This man has no cursed energy. They couldn’t stop him from leaving. The man-Toji scowls and drapes his left ankle on his thigh.

“Why the fuck am I here? And why should I care about Fox face here?” His deep, low voice echoes through the room and Mikoto doesn’t need to be a shinobi to see how his tone is inflicted with bitterness and the scowl that appears when his name is presented. He doesn’t like his name. He doesn’t like the clan. Interesting.

Shiu snorts and lights pulls out a cigarette case from his pocket. “Relax Zenin. Kitsune-chan is basically your senpai. She’s been my longest client and has been in the game longer than almost anyone here. She’s good. Trust me.”

Zenin quickly flits his eyes towards her before his face relaxes into a bored expression, but Mikoto can see that his eyes are filled with interest. “I’ve been doing fine on my own. I don’t need someone like her weighing me down” scowling at her. Anger and frustration rise in her body and she has to resist letting it show, something, she has not grown akin to doing in this world so easily. Mikoto cannot tell if his easy dismissal of her is due to gender or his confidence in his skills. Either way it’s annoying and she has absolutely nothing to prove to this man, she is an Uchiha and a shinobi. She does not need the approval of this stranger nor frankly, anyone in the Jujustu world.

Shiu rolls his eyes and inhaling his cigarette, “You’re good Zenin but you’ve only been in the game for a couple months. Kitsune-chan has been here for years. And I need both of you on this job. The client requested my best and you two right now are my best, especially for an extra bonus. Who knows if you guys work well together you can be official partners or some shit.” This better be a good fucking bonus. She cannot help the scoff that leaves her mouth as she says, “As if I need a fucking child who just ran away from his clan to follow me around. I work alone”

“What the fuck did you say to me bitch?” Zenin turns his head to glare at her and she meets him head on. “Can you not hear? I said I don’t need a spoiled, clan-raised child holding my hand while I’m trying to work. So why don’t you sit in the corner and play while the adults are talking?”

It happens so fast she barely has time to dodge the knife that is being thrown directly at her throat and launch the kunai at his right thigh. Toji and Mikoto are standing up now and it’s only with her sharingan that she is able to block the fist coming at her left side. She kicks the couch they were sitting on to distract him and she grabs his outstretched arm and pulls the dark sleeve of his sweater forward to use as leverage to jam a kunai in his stomach, but he quickly backs away and kicks the flying couch into the back wall while racing to kick her away. She blocks it but the force of his kick pushes her into the wall creating a crater and she uses the impact of the dust and crushed concrete as a smokescreen to run right to-

“What the fuck? Stop!” Shiu cuts in and he’s staring at the two of them with wide eyes and a cigarette hanging in his hand as they’re surrounded by dust and broken furniture in the room. It has been twenty seconds. Green meets spinning red eyes as Mikoto and Toji continue staring at each other even though they have followed Shiu’s instructions to stop moving. “Fuck! You guys can kill each other after this job. I swear.” Mikoto can hear Shiu grumbling and swearing under his breath in Korean, but that’s at the back of her mind, as her eyes never leave the Zenin man. He’s strong. He would’ve killed me without the Sharingan and if I wasn’t on alert. Why is he so strong? Is it because he has no cursed energy? I’m supposed to trust this man to have my back for this job?

Konohagakure prides itself in their teamwork. Three person genin squads led by a Jounin teacher. Teams have built the foundation for the village’s successful mission rates and despite the policing of her clan, Mikoto never actually felt unsafe when working with fellow Konoha shinobi during missions. They were in war. You needed to put aside clan rivalries and petty arguments because their home is being attacked. Better to trust an Uchiha than an Iwa-nin. The only people she truly trusted on the battlefield to have her back were genin team of Kushina and Hyuuga Hitomi, and her fellow clansmen. One bound by blood and the other through love and time and respect. How the fuck was she supposed to work and go on a mission with essentially a powerful stranger?

Zenin is probably thinking the same thing seeing as his eyes have not left hers. Shiu sighs and holds out a folder, “It’s one hundred million yen. After my cut, you each walk away with thirty-five million and a bonus if it’s clean.” Zenin’s eyes finally flits towards the folder and she can’t really blame him. Mikoto looks at his raggedy clothing and slippers, and realizes that he needs the money. She has money but thirty-five million from one job is the most she’s ever seen before, so the client must be desperate and insanely wealthy. Even from their twenty second scruff, Zenin is good and although he’s only been working for less than a year, she knows that he’ll make a name for himself. It’s better to have him as an ally for now and it’s only one job before they part ways forever. I’ll kill him if he slips up.

She sighs at her decision and takes the folder outstretched in Shiu’s arms. Mikoto quickly memorizes it with the sharingan and hands it back to Shiu, instead of the Zenin man, just because she is petty like that. Shiu huffs and as he hands it to Zenin, while the man just rolls his eyes at her.

The job by itself is straight forward, apparently Kamo Natsuki pissed someone off so badly that they want him and his wife dead. Kamo Natsuki has to be at least a second grade sorcerer. His wife won’t be an issue but Kamo, despite being a branch member, is high enough in the clan that his absence will be noticed hence the high price tag on his head. The client wants this to look clean too, so this will have to be properly planned.

Mikoto quickly flicks her eyes to Zenin to gauge his reaction and see if he has any additional information. Zenin despite his strength and non-existence, is still a new to the underworld and she needs to see if he is the type to actually play the waiting game or make a plan on the spot. He is also part of a major clan, so he must have some information about the Kamo compound and its layout, maybe even the techniques of their targets. He feels her eyes on him and scowls, before giving a slight nod.

“Meet me at the train station tomorrow at midnight. Pack a bag.” She says, before performing a shunshin, quickly leaving without his response. Mikoto lands on the lamp post across the street from the board room, near an empty alleyway. She quickly puts on her ring that suppresses her cursed energy, and shunshin again to the roof, allowing for a clear view of the front entrance and side exits of the building. She would be a fool to instantly trust this man, and with his lack of presence and strength, she needs to find some sort of weakness on him.

It takes another seven minutes before she spots the Zenin man leave through the side exit, and Mikoto turns on her sharingan and begins to follow from a distance. He puts on hood of his sweater and walks through the crowded streets, as he heads closer and closer to the main intersection of the city. Mikoto is reluctantly impressed that such a large man with a poor disguise can move through crowds so easily, being over six feet in this country is rare.

She keeps her distance on the rooftops and several meters away, but she’s annoyed that he’s fast enough that she has to keep consistently moving. He moves like a jounin shinobi, especially as she pours cursed energy into her ears and realizes that his footsteps are completely silent. He’s well trained. Not only in combat but reconnaissance. Almost a second too soon, she ducks and silently shunshin into an alleyway, as Zenin turns his head to her exact position on the rooftop.

How? Her cursed energy is basically a child’s amount. The amount she’s using is so fine that it could pass as a civilian adult leaking outward. He has no cursed energy himself, so how could he sense her? Is he so battle trained that he instinctually able to sense someone’s eyes on him?

She can’t wait too long or else she’ll lose him. Zenin is fast and with his invisible man routine, it’ll be all night before she finds him again. Mikoto has to weigh her options. Either continue following him and risk confrontation or simply wait it out for tomorrow. Fuck it. He’s too dangerous to meet tomorrow.

Mikoto shunshin to the opposite rooftop and focuses her sharingan on the large crowd at the intersection for a tall man with a dark hoodie. She’s finally able to spot him at the very far end moving to the left and continues to follow after him. He is headed to the train station, so she quickly changes into civilian clothes and packs her clothes and mask into the cursed bag she made. The bag is square, and small enough that she can strap onto her thigh. It’s also a semi-liability, it has cursed energy that she can’t hide with her ring but leaks enough to be a small grade four curse. It’s too useful to leave behind though, she can practically pack all her weapons and things in there without the limitations of weight that storage scrolls have. This cursed bag only has the limit of size. She can’t put anything larger than a width and length of three meters, but that’s perfectly fine for her sword lengths and clothing.

Storage scrolls have a capacity limit of weight, too much and it causes the seal to collapse and all the things inside the scroll to be lost in space. The actual seal is simple and generic enough that all nations were able to copy it, however chakra paper is an expensive resource, something that Konohakagure, the Village Hidden in the Leaves, never had an issue with. Mikoto is not a Fuinjutsu master, that has always been Kushina and annoyingly, Namikaze Minato’s specialty. She knows enough to make standard barriers, and bombs and storage seals, but it has never came natural to her, no matter how hard Kushina tried to teach her.

Mikoto remembers practicing shuriken throws on the Third Training Ground. It was after their standard genin training, and their jounin-sensei, Yuuhei Asuka told them they were done for the day but were welcome to continue practicing, as long as they didn’t push too hard for tomorrow’s training. Hyuuga Hitomi was massaging her limbs and rubbing a healing salve on her palms and Mikoto couldn’t help the burst of pride in her, knowing that she beat Hitomi in today’s taijustu spar. Kushina decided to take out a couple of notebooks and practice some seals that Mito-sama gave her.

The Uzumaki clan is historically allied with the Senju, and that never stopped Mikoto and Kushina from being friends in the Academy, and since they’re now teammates they have no excuse for not hanging out. It still feels somewhat taboo to ask her about fuinjutsu though. Shinobi clans are extremely secretive and paranoid notably those with kekkai gekkai, so much so, that it’s embedded into the clan treaty laws of the village, and actually asking about clan techniques past general questions is generally seen as forbidden. Mikoto can’t help her curiosity though, especially with Uzushiogakure falling, fuinjustu is powerful and extremely rare.

Kushina seems to sense her eyes on her, “What’s wrong Miko-chan? Oh! Are you interested in sealing? Come! I can totally teach you! You too Hitomi-chan!” Mikoto and Hitomi look at each other, knowing the underlying clan politics of sharing knowledge, but seeing Kushina’s bright eyes, Mikoto nods and collects her shuriken to sit down next to her. Hitomi slowly makes her way towards the sparkled out notebooks and sits down as well.

“I’ve always been interested in learning sealing.” Mikoto smiles, and starts to roam her eyes at Kushina’s notebooks as she tries to discern her handwriting. Hitomi politely nods, but doesn’t say anything. The topic of sealing isn’t popular amongst the Hyuuga, for obvious reasons. Kushina snorts and starts to point at what looks like random lines, “That academy sucks at sealing. I learned more when I was five than what they teach us. Dattebane! This one is pretty advanced but it’s basically a containment seal. Anyone who steps inside this will be trapped and their chakra completely sealed. Isn’t that cool? Dattebane!”

The two girls eyes’ widen in amazement and move closer, but Kushina is met with scrunched up faces trying discern squiggly lines and shapes. Kushina laughs, “Okay, okay. I’ll teach you guys the basics. Dattebane!” Hitomi turns to Mikoto, “Um…is it possible for the sharingan to copy fuinjutsu? Since it’s just writing and chakra right?” Mikoto shakes her head, while Kushina snorts, “No way in hell! Fuinjustu is based on intent and I guess theory. Even if Miko-chan copies my exact seal, as long as, she doesn’t know what it does or let’s say she skips a line but redraws it later it won’t work. It’s not like kanji or writing where you can just add it in later to make sense, there’s a base you have to start with and then you can go crazy and add stuff to make it make sense. Dattebane!”

Mikoto nods, adding, “It’s true. Plus the sharingan is ultimately based on instinct and skill. Very few of my clan members can copy all jutsu they see. In theory we can, but let’s say a water jutsu is performed. I’m fire-based and inexperienced with water, so even if I know the hand signs, if I can’t mold my chakra to expel that nature there’s no point in copying it. That’s why training and understanding chakra theory is a big deal for us.” Hitomi nods her head, “I get that. In the clan, we study tenketsu points and the eight gates very intimately. There’s no point in seeing something, you cannot understand.”

Despite the rivalry between their clans, Mikoto gives Hitomi a genuine smile, an innate understanding of dojutsu kekkai gekkai shared between them. The rest of the afternoon is spent with three eleven year old girls writing in notebooks and listening about the wonders of fuinjutsu and chakra theory. Like most days in Konoha, it’s sunny and Mikoto’s heart feels warm when she thinks about those days of Kushina’s adept rants and theories of fuinjustu and Hitomi’s hesitant questions and snacks. It is one of the untainted memories she holds of Konoha, a sunny afternoon consisting of three girls talking together.

Mikoto follows Zenin on to the train, in civilian clothes and a book she snatched from one of the shops leading into the boarding area. He’s in the car next to hers, and she’s able to see him sitting down through the connecting window. Despite not wearing her mask, she’s still paranoid and opens the romance book, occasionally flipping pages while keeping an eye on him. She weirdly feels like Hatake Kakashi and shakes her head, as her eyes skim the terribly written sentences of sappy and dramatic scenarios.

He gets off at Awajicho station, and she follows as he switches lines to the east Shinjuku line. After two stops he switches again to go north, following the Asakusa line and Mikoto begins to have her suspicions. Her suspicions are confirmed when he exits at Asakusa station and takes the Ginza line, leading west and south.

Zenin knows that he’s being followed and he is leading Mikoto into a square, probably back to Tokyo station where they fucking started. Mikoto sighs and closes her book to look out the connecting window, only to stare directly at Zenin Toji. This fucker. He has the audacity to fucking smirk at her, the scarred side of his lip raising upwards. She can only glare at him, as they both exit at Kanda station, and take the Shinjuku line back west.

When they finally board the Marunouchi line back south to Tokyo, Mikoto decides to sit down and take out her book again. Zenin actually sits down next to her, the train is packed even at five in the afternoon, so they’re sitting thigh to thigh. It genuinely disturbs her how she can feel the warmth and weight of his body pressed next to her, but she cannot sense his presence or any ounce of cursed energy.

“So what did we learn today?” His voice is low and quiet, matching the quietness of their train compartment. Mikoto hates the condescension she hears in his tone, and decides to match his question with her own. “When did you catch on to me?” Zenin hums, and she thinks he won’t answer until, “Shinjuku. Felt eyes on me for a while and I found it weird that the same pretty face kept appearing. Asakusa confirmed it.”

“That’s a lie.” She airily says. Mikoto knows shinobi enough that pretty faces don’t matter, when they are trying to kill you and she’s been casting genjutsu to further hide her face and avoid paying. Genjutsu works by controlling chakra in the brain, being able to cast an illusion to control all the senses, hence neurons. After years of practice and the sharingan, she’s able to emulate the same results with cursed energy. That’s why she knows that genjutsu will not work with Zenin, since he has no cursed energy. He knows my real face now. It still doesn’t explain how he’s able to spot her though.

Zenin huffs, “Tough crowd. Fine. But really, what did we learn today?” Mikoto keeps her eyes on her page, but feels the senbon dipped in poison sewed into her sleeve. “That you’re a paranoid bastard who knows the map of the train map well.” He laughs and stretches his arm to wrap behind her head. Mikoto raises her book to cover her face, and moves her senbon out of her sleeve and points it his artery on his wrist that’s around her.

“Come any closer and you’ll be dead by the next stop.” She icily warns him, and for extra measure, she looks at him with her sharingan pulsing. Zenin raises her hands and takes arm off of her casually, but she can see how his pulse jumped from the vein in his neck and how his breathing stuttered slightly. “Those are some freaky eyes. Are you sure, you’re not a black sheep Gojo cousin?” Mikoto rolls her eyes and turns back to her book, “I’m not. You can stop projecting on me now.”

She can feel Zenin low growl and the rising killing intent in the air, and if she was any less of a shinobi she would be fearful. But she is not. She will not allow a man, powerful or not, to intimidate her. “You should be careful on what you say, Fox Face. Shiu wouldn’t be very happy if I killed you before our job together.” Mikoto rolls her eyes, “I’m not going to be very happy if you keep scaring the passengers with your killing intent. Settle down, you’re making us noticeable.” Despite his obvious irritation, he follows her instructions and the air seems easier to breathe, as light chatter fills the compartment. Mikoto applies another genjustu around them to prevent this from happening again and make them unnoticeable, and she feels Zenin watching her despite the lack of hand signs.

“So that’s what you’ve been doing huh?” He grumbles. Mikoto puts down her book and raises an eyebrow at him, as he continues, “Pretty useful technique. Manipulating cursed energy in the air so easily, and I bet your eyes help you with it.” She simply hums in response, not confirming or denying it. “That’s not all you can do though. Is it?” She continues to ignore him and he smirks again, like he’s confirming something. He’s smart, possibly Nara level smart. It pisses her off even though she already knew that from the sharpness in his eyes.

The rest of the ride to Tokyo is silent and it’s at their stop, when they are about to board off, when he mumbles, “You have no scent.” She tries to keep her face blank as everything clicks in her mind. She nods, “Don’t be late.” Zenin nods and she quickly leaves the train station.

You have no scent.

A Heavenly Restriction.

Heavenly Restriction is a phenomena that is frankly befuddling to Mikoto. No such thing exists in the Elemental Nations, and once again she is amazed by the absurdity of the world. A pact, or a binding contract made with the universe that one thing is exchanged for the other. Even the name is absurd and dramatic. She forgets that fate and talent are intertwined so deeply in this world, and yet it semi makes sense following the logic of the world. Power comes with a cost and the universe demands balance.

Zenin Toji, in exchange for zero cursed energy was given absurd power over his five senses. He is like a mix of Might Dai and a Hatake. He must have noticed that she had no scent nor made noise, when they met and he followed those observations onto the train rides. He was able to point her out on the train because she’s the only one who doesn’t have a scent, even though he’s never seen her face and was able to see through her genjutsu. It’s so fucking illogical and yet it makes sense, and she almost wants to laugh.

That explains his speed and combat skills. If he wasn’t so infuriating, Mikoto would actually be amazed at him. She is amazed but she won’t say it out loud due to pride. How did the Zenin clan let him escape? It’s quite easy to explain how he was able to leave, but that doesn’t explain why he would. He has no cursed energy, so he can easily escape domain expansions. With his Heavenly Restriction, Zenin Toji is essentially the perfect assassin. For some reason, he hates his clan. The Jujustu world consists of more fools than she thought if they allowed someone as dangerous as him to leave, and join the underworld.

Zenin meets her at the train station three minutes late. She’s annoyed but refuses to give him the satisfaction, when she sees the amusement in his eyes. They board the train and Mikoto mentally prepares herself for the six hour train ride to Kyoto, as Zenin sits across from her, his duffle bag on the seat beside him. It’s late and there’s no point in conversing until they get there so, Mikoto takes out headphones and the mp3 player she bought and decides to listen to music. As Deftones ‘Around the Fur’ album reaches her ears, Mikoto rests her eyes and lays back and meditates, slowly turning the cursed energy around her body. She’s refuses to sleep near a stranger, as dangerous as him and the adrenaline towards the mission keeps her awake. Zenin must know this because he rolls his eyes and lays back as well and closes his eyes.

It’s five in the morning when she opens her eyes again, and though she didn’t sleep, she feels decently rested. A woman with a cart comes to them with tea and small snacks, as an announcement is played over the speakers that they’ll be arriving in an hour. Zenin is also awake and takes the tea and snacks, and she thinks he actually slept which pisses her off that he isn’t taking her seriously. It’s when they are thirty minutes until arrival, that she breaks their tentative silence. “You know where the Kamo compound is.” It is a statement not a question, and Zenin flicks his chin down to confirm.

She decides to continue, “First couple days will be reconnaissance and finding a hotel. We’ll strike later and I’ve texted Shiu to meet us in the city on Friday.” He nods and adds in a groggy voice, “Kamo isn’t the type to leave the compound much. His wife will be harder to get.” Mikoto hums in agreement, “I agree. He’s a branch member leader though, so he’s most likely to be sent in the city for civilian business. It’ll give us more grounds to work with once we learn his schedule. Given your abilities, you can easily get into the compound for his wife though.”

Zenin raises an eyebrow, “Praising me now Fox Face?” Mikoto rolls her eyes, “Hardly. I haven’t survived this long by dismissing people. I can acknowledge strength when I see it.” He flicks his eyes at her, “Yet you’ve barely seen me in action.” She’s confused and annoyed now. Did he think she would forget their twenty second scuffle? Or the fact that he managed to catch her tracking him? “Don’t be ridiculous. Of course I see you.” Green meets black, and Mikoto finds herself being studied by Zenin Toji. Their impromptu staring contest lasts a full minute, before he turns his head to scoff. “Whatever.” He mumbles out.

What a strange man.

They board off the train and find a small hotel, a couple blocks from the station and can accommodate two rooms. The rest of the week and their mission together, runs surprisingly smooth. The Kamo compound is large and imposing with its traditional structure and closed off gates, but walking up a tree and using the sharingan allows for Mikoto to spot him walking towards the main house. Due to him being inside a building, she can’t read his lips and hear what he’s discussing, but she’s able to memorize his cursed energy signature and that’s enough for her to track him throughout the week. His wife is harder to find, but it seems like she does leave their house to visit her fellow clan women, and she’s able to memorize her signature, even though it takes all night.

She reluctantly tells Zenin this, and he nods and begins his turn at memorizing their schedules. She does see how his eyebrows raise when she tells him, that she’s memorized Kamo’s cursed energy signature and tucks away the knowledge that he knows about her sensing abilities. His senses really are trained to inhuman levels, because he tells her that he overheard how Kamo is planning to take a trip to the city for a meeting with a smaller clan, just like they expected he would.

The mission runs too smoothly, that it’s genuinely suspicious, but Mikoto has to shrug it off and accept that this is just how life is. They spend the rest of their week, memorizing schedules and finalizing plans until Friday comes with Shiu. Toji will take out Kamo’s wife, while she will kill Kamo. She plans to kill Kamo after his meeting with the minor clan, as an easy distraction and it’ll give them enough time to leave the city while the clans investigate.

When the day comes, Mikoto sets off early to visit the compound and follow the car towards the meeting place. The meeting is set at a nice, private restaurant and it’s almost child’s play to sneak in and paralyze the guards. She puts on a wig and contacts, and with some genjustu it is easy to pretend to be a waitress that has worked at the restaurant for over a year. The cup she pours tea in, is laced with a slow reacting poison, Curare, on the brim. It’s a good distraction from his actual cause of death and Mikoto cannot help but roll her eyes at the lack of caution Jujustu sorcerers have towards death, not caused by curses.

One of the guards does test the tea and food, but it’s useless since the poison is on the specific cup and is slow anyways. The meeting is quite boring and less of a meeting and more of an intimidation ritual, Kamo Natsuki unsubtly threatening the Mochizuki clan with extinction if they do not comply with the agreed terms. So this is how only three clans have maintained power in Jujustu society. She’s heard of minor clans and the power of the Inumaki clan is genuinely fearsome, but she’s still surprised at the lack of tenacity and backbone presented.

Major clans in the Elemental Nations have servant and smaller allied clans under them. The Uchiha have historically allied with the Yuuhei, Fuu and Kurama clans, like the Senju have allied with the Sarutobi and Hatake, but she’s never seen such a blatant display of dominance and almost bullying. Shinobi clans, no matter how small are still shinobi. When pushed they will not hesitate to stab others in the back, if it means survival. All shinobi know this and that’s why despite how dominate power can be, it is still right to maintain decent relationships and contracts. Not to mention, honourable to treat allies with respect.

Mikoto doesn’t necessarily enjoy killing, but in this instance she fully has no problem with letting Kamo Natsuki die. When the meeting is finished and Kamo is waiting for the car in the underground parking lot, Mikoto strikes. She turns on her sharingan and casts a nausea-inducing genjustu on the guards when they make eye contact with her, and with one quick slash of her katana severs their heads from their necks. She turns to Kamo who opens his mouth to shout and she spots his hands form into signs, when he begins to choke. The poison must be kicking in right on time, so she casts another genjustu on the area to prevent anyone from hearing his screams and seeing the three bodies on the floor, before throwing a wave of senbon layered with cursed energy directly into his chest and throat.

It has been one minute, so the car will pull up soon. Senbon was the right choice to prevent more bleeding and easy transportation. She’s lucky Kamo is on the shorter side, as she picks him up and tries her best to quickly stuff him into her cursed bag. Mikoto performs a quick hand sign to burn the three bodies bleeding on the floor and shoves her sword back into the handle, and shunshin out of the parking lot, just as the car pulls in. She races back to the hotel by rooftop, and quickly changes and checks out of the hotel before sitting down on the bench outside of the high rise hotel, she and Zenin are meeting Shiu at.

Fifteen minutes later, Zenin arrives spotless and with his duffle bag in his hand. A grotesque, purple worm is also on his shoulder and she can’t help her scowl when she spots it. The worm is clearly a curse and a low level one, but there is something about it that makes her pause. She turns on her sharingan and stares at the curse around Zenin’s shoulder, ignoring his questioning look, and it’s there that she spots it. The curse has the ability to store things, that much is obvious when she sees the body-shaped form inside of it, but it is the stack of cursed weapons that fascinates her. Particularly the katana and dagger hidden inside of it.

It feels like fire is erupting her body, and it is not her sensing abilities, but like her very soul can feel the cursed energy and spirit brimming within those particular weapons. Those weapons are cursed tools. Those weapons are Uchiha made cursed tools. Is this why she felt different when she first met Zenin? Where did he get those? Where was he hiding them? The power emitting from those tools is immense and she can almost hear, the soul of her ancestor and his madness scream through, that it feels disorienting.

“What the fuck? Are you high or something?” A gruff voice, cuts through the screams and Mikoto is snapped out of her dazed trance induced by the cursed tools. “What?” She mumbles out, before shaking her head and turning off her sharingan to look down at the ground. Zenin is looking at her intently now, “Don’t tell me Kamo hit you with his technique.” Mikoto shakes her head and smooths her face, “Of course not. He barely saw me.” Zenin looks like he doesn’t believe her, but it doesn’t matter because Shiu walks out from the building towards them. She quickly puts on her Kitsune mask to prevent Shiu from seeing her and spots Zenin roll his eyes.

“Good. You guys are here and still alive.” He says, before turning around and leading them into the hotel. The room is another boarding room, and she takes Kamo out of her bag and lays him on the low, coffee table. She pointedly watches as Zenin’s worm vomits out the body of the wife, wrapped in cloth. Disgusting but useful. Shiu whistles as he examines the bodies, “Clean. The bonus is worth it. The money will be wired in your accounts by the end of the night.” He takes out a cigarette and lights it, “Congrats. I knew you two would work well together.”

Mikoto doesn’t deny it, and notices that Zenin also stays silent. For all that he annoys her, Zenin is good and they did work well together, enough that the job was extremely smooth and partially easy to finish. This week has been weirdly exhausting, especially the revelation of the Uchiha tools, so instead of replying, she nods and bows to Shiu to make her exit. Mikoto’s curiosity is too strong though, and she finds herself waiting outside near the bench again waiting for Zenin.

She lights a cigarette of her own to soothe the dazed trance that the cursed tools caused her, and she’s almost halfway done when Zenin appears in front of her without his weird worm creature. She knows she can’t sense him, but her heart still stutters in surprise when he suddenly appears. “Waiting for me?” He asks neutrally but she can hear the curiosity in his tone too. Mikoto decides to be blunt because frankly she’s tired, “Your worm holds weapons. Where did you get them?”

That seems to catch him off guard, and he raises an eyebrow, “Why do you ask?” She shrugs, “Humour your new partner.” Zenin narrows his eyes and is silent while roaming his eyes at her face. “Stole majority them from the Zenin’s.” The Zenin’s. Of course, Uchiha weapons would be held by the three clans. Some of them were probably at Jujustu High as well. The answer is so obvious that she wonders why she didn’t think of it sooner, but then remembers how often grandfather would warn her about Jujustu society and how Kamo Natsuki spoke to the Mochizuki clan before his death. They have to hoard and protect their positions somehow, even at the expense of the very people who made their power.

Mikoto lets out a bitter chuckle, as she lights another cigarette, “Of course they have them.” Zenin watches her inhale her cigarette, “So we’re partners now?” She rolls her eyes, “I’m not begging you Zenin, but I don’t mind.” He scoffs, “Don’t call me that. Is that why you’re not hiding your face anymore?” This causes her to pause, as she considers the implications of his question. She looks at the man in front of her, and openly roams her eyes up and down his body.

Mikoto isn’t blind. Zenin Toji is attractive. Extremely attractive. But as she watches, his smirk slowly grow wider, she decides that his infuriating personality cancels out any desire for sex, and chooses the professional route for their future partnership. She stands up quickly catching him off guard slightly and brings her face close to his, as she widens her eyes and tilts her head, “Is there any point in hiding from you, Zenin?” And blows cigarette smoke in his face. He waves his hand to fan out the smoke, and Mikoto is met with glaring green eyes.

“I told you to not fucking call me that Fox Face.” Mikoto looks at him blankly, “It’s not like I prefer ‘Fox Face’ Zenin.” He scowls, “Do you have a fucking animal kink or something? I’m not calling you Kitsune-chan.” Maybe her lack of sleep really is catching up on her, because Mikoto snaps, “Just call me by my name for fuck’s sake then.” Zenin scowls again, “What the hell is it?” And she pauses realizing her slip, but decides that it’s too late and takes another inhale of her cigarette, “Mikoto.”

Zenin’s face smooths out and the air grows pensive, as he stares at her again. Mikoto continues smoking her cigarette in silence, waiting for an irritating comment, as he says, “Mikoto. Toji.” She looks back up at him and says out loud, practicing the name on her tongue, “Toji.” The two assassins are silent and continue to stare at each other as Mikoto finishes her cigarette, before dropping it on the ground and stepping on it. It seems like she’s done here, and there is nothing else to discuss as her curiosity is sated.

She turns to leave for the train station and when she hears, “Mikoto.” She turns her head to Zen-Toji’s voice, and he’s looking blankly at her, “Wanna get a drink?”

Zenin Toji has realized that it’s been one year since he’s met Mikoto and that night is memorable because it was the first time he saw her as an actual friend. They had a good work relationship despite her icy nature and quick temper and his asshole tendencies, and outside of work he likes to sit back and drink with her in random bars while they both try to ignore the tension between them. He still doesn’t know if that tension is murderous or sexual, but he knows that it changes day to day.

She’s dangerous.

Was what he first thought of her. She arrived completely silent to the dark boardroom, Kong Shiu set up for their first meeting. A white porcelain, Kitsune mask hid her face, but his eyes instantly zeroed in on the spinning red eyes with black tomoe that peeked through What the fuck? Another eye based technique? I thought Gojo was the only one?.

She might be more dangerous than the Six Eyes. He thought as she sat beside him, and he realized that she had no fucking scent. With Heavenly Restriction his senses are almost fifty times stronger than the average humans, and most sorcerers with all their arrogance about their cursed energy techniques, forget that they are still made of fucking flesh and blood. This woman though, she is a true assassin, because she has intentionally blocked her scent, and combined with her completely silent movements makes her dangerous.

Mikoto actually managed to block his attempted hits, and even though he wasn’t trying super hard, he knows that she was holding back too. It made his blood boil with adrenaline, knowing that she can back up her shit talking and hold her own, just as much as it annoys him. She was smart too, actually being able to track him down and having the audacity to, which annoyed him just as much as it was entertaining, catching her off guard at the all the train stops. As she controlled the cursed energy in the air casually and without any hand signs, and held a poisoned needle to his artery, Toji found himself more and more interested in her.

Mikoto’s face surprised him. He wasn’t lying when he said she was pretty, even though she seemed to ignore that comment. Mikoto was beautiful and elegant in a rich, clan-born way. When he sat down next to her on the train, he got to study her without the mask and the small window separating their train compartments. Her hair is down leaving long straight black locks streaming down her back with dark bangs framing her pale complexion. Sharp chin, long thin nose, high cheekbones and most surprisingly her eyes. Without the freaky red colour and mask, her eyes are large and almond shaped and pitch black, so dark he could barely see her pupils even with heavenly restriction. With a face like that, it’s no wonder she wears a mask.

He already knew she was clan born from the emblem embroidered on the vest that she wears. A small, red and white fan. It was strange and an old tradition, and he has never seen that clan emblem before. Is it even a Jujustu clan? Even without it, seeing how she acted outside of jobs, told him everything. All elegant features, and weirdly polite manners towards Shiu and basically everyone who wasn’t him.

One day, after one of their jobs together he invited her to a seedy club. She seemed to know the place, and decided that she wanted to stop being so prissy and have fun, so she went and actually changed her clothes. He allowed himself to trail his eyes down her body and the short tight black dress she was wearing. Plain and club appropriate, and hid enough for the imagination. More on the lithe side with the strength and toned arms and legs to prove it, but definitely not lacking in curves.

He still hasn’t exactly figure out how she manages to dampen her cursed energy levels into civilian reserves, but without the sharp and foreboding look in her eyes, he would’ve thought she was a noble lady or a rich client, with her straight back and raised chin like she was looking down on everyone in this shithole. If she titled her head and widened her eyes, she could've fooled him into thinking a completely innocent, princess walked into a seedy club by accident. He looked up to see her unimpressed look at him openly staring at her breasts and face and he couldn’t resist licking his lips and ordering them drinks.

They traded barbs and drank a lot that night and paid for none of it. It turns out Mikoto knew perfectly well that she was beautiful and hence resorted to low effort flirting towards men and women to get free drinks. Seriously, all she had to do was batt her eyelashes and occasionally trail a finger down an arm to get men and women to buy her a drink. It was pathetic and hilarious if he couldn’t feel the effects of her swaying hips and sultry eyes on him as well. And she watched him do the same with his arms around waists and casual winks thrown around.

It became a silent game that night, who can get the most drinks out of people and safe to say they both won that night. They don’t have sex together, and for some reason, he’s not entirely disappointed in it, instead departing with other people with eye rolls and small smiles and the silent agreement to meet for drinks again. He remembered thrusting down the throat of a woman with dark hair he couldn’t remember the face or name of but slept over at, and cumming hard at imagining straight silky locks and keen dark eyes looking up at him from her knees.

He thinks that she’s actually the only one he’s ever met that can give him a good fight and hold her own against him. The way she holds her sword and cuts through people is elegant and effective like watching a dance. There’s fire and viciousness in the way she dances through opponents with a blank face, and all while leaving without a speck of blood on her, only pure professionalism and eager eyes from winning and killing their target.

Mikoto is strong and she knows it, the title of “Bloody Kitsune” and associated reputation is something she earned. She’s so fucking infuriating about it too in that polite-ass, smug noblewoman way and he doesn’t know if he wants to stab her or fuck her. It is both. And he knows she thinks that too, from the way he occasionally catches her running her eyes up and down his arms and staring at the scar on his lip, and reaching for the knife hidden in her sleeve for a second too long when they bicker.

Right now they’re drinking at a table in a small bar, nothing super dingy but still on the smaller side and he sees how the waitresses have been batting their eyelashes at him at night. Toji and Mikoto do their usual song and dance after work. They do their job, get paid, and go out to get free drinks and meals that other people have bought them, and then leave with other people. He pulls the waitress into his lap and he nods at her yapping while slowly moving his hand up and down her thigh, while making eye contact with Mikoto. Mikoto raises an eyebrow and rolls her eyes before standing up to get a drink from the bar, since their waitress is blushing and currently preoccupied.

Like most nights he unabashedly stares at her ass and swaying hips as she moves through the room and the light crowd of people like water. He continues to entertain the girl in his lap and lightly pawing her, when he sees in the corner of his eyes, a suited man approaching Mikoto, probably to flirt and buy her a drink. He internally chuckles at the dumbass and grabs the waitress’s hand and starts kissing her fingers. The girl in his lap turns her body inward and begins to play with his hair, running her fingers through the strands and he continues to hum in response to her talking.

He does his usual routine and turns his head back to the bar, hoping to make eye contact with Mikoto and seeing her smirk, as she does the same thing to a random suit. Toji can’t help it with his Heavenly Restriction and the subsequent consequences of having heightened senses. He can’t fucking control it and does his best to ignore that fact that he can pretty much hear the heartbeats of everyone within the vicinity but it is useful, especially as he turns his ears to actually witness this. A man in his late twenties or early thirties with dark hair and average build and civilian level cursed energy, walks towards Mikoto at the bar and Toji prepares himself to shitty pick up lines, but instead hears, “U-Uchiha-chan?”

Mikoto snaps her head and Toji hears how she says in a soft voice, “Hello Fuji-sensei.” Mikoto is good at her job. That woman has more masks and an ironclad shield around her than almost anyone and he’s seen how she easily slips them on especially during infiltration jobs. But after a year of working together and having casual talks outside of work, Toji can say he generally has a decent read on her. So he knows that she is genuinely caught off guard for once, probably due to the alcohol she’s been drinking all night.

Uchiha? Fan? She wears a fan clan symbol. Is that the name of her clan? Sensei? Maybe he’ll actually find something useful on her. Once again, this woman has ironclad defences and he knows that everything he knows about her, is purely because she let him and whatever knowledge the general underworld has on her. This random suit might actually be the key to getting under her skin, so he concentrates his hearing on their conversation.

“It’s-it’s actually you Uchiha-chan?! How…how are you alive?” The man stutters and Toji sees how his eyes are wandering up and down, and how his ears turn red when he sees the dress she’s wearing. It’s strange. Mikoto’s guard is up and her face is blank but Toji can hear from her tone and how her eyes soften slightly, that she actually does feel something for this random civilian man. “Does it matter?” Mikoto’s face goes cold, and Fuji starts to stutter, before she cuts him off, “You’re married now.”

Fuji is clearly surprised and his mouth opens and closes, before he stares down at his left hand and sighs, “Yes. Since three months ago.” Mikoto takes a sip of her drink and gives him a polite smile, “Congratulations.” Fuji turns his ring around with his fingers, “Thank you Uchiha-chan.” He turns to order a beer and they sit in silence at the bar. “Did you switch schools?” Mikoto asks, breaking the silence. Fuji takes a long sip of his beer and responds, “No I still teach in Chiba. My cousin is getting married so I’m here attending the celebration party.” Mikoto hums and the conversation stops.

Well that was fucking boring. She’s from Chiba then and this is just her old high school teacher. For the next couple of minutes, they just sit there drinking in complete silence and Toji wonders why the fuck Mikoto is still sitting there, or at least not putting Fuji in a freaky illusion to make him leave. Is she gonna homewreck? She cares about him. Or at least doesn’t know what to do with him. Mikoto finally puts a hand on his wrist lying on the table as she asks in a low voice, “How long will you be here for?” Fuji’s ears turn red and his neck begins to flush, as he starts chug his beer and turns his head to her small hand on his wrist. “Not long.” She hums in response and Toji knows that this was a waste of a conversation. She’s just gonna fuck this man who happened to be from her past and it’ll be like every other night. He hears his heart pick up the pace, and huffs at this pathetic ass man.

Mikoto takes out a cigarette and lights it, inhaling before passing the box to Suit. He takes a cigarette and lights it and they smoke in silence. “I always suspected that you were secretly rebellious.” She turns and raises an eyebrow. “Once I thought I smelled smoke on you when we passed by each other. And during my lunch break, I wandered on to the rooftop and saw cigarettes littered around. They were this brand.” He inhales and taps the ash in the cigarette tray. She hums and inhales and exhales her cigarette, “Why did you never call me out then?” Suit chuckles and shrugs,” It was only a suspicion and you were a model student. I just thought you were probably a stressed high school student. I didn’t think anyone would actually believe me either if I did call you out.” The corner of her lip twitches upward and she takes a sip to hide it. “Was smoking the only thing that made me rebellious, Fuji-sensei?” She tilts her head and lowers her voice to a trill that Toji knows is her hook to get people into her sphere of influence. In this case it’s her bed.

Suit chokes and takes a sip from his drink to stop his coughing. Jesus this guy is pathetic. Even icy Mikoto can’t hide the gleam of amusement in her eyes from seeing his reaction. The loser finally calms down his coughing but his ears are bright red and his heart is racing. He looks more sober now and lowers his eyes to Mikoto’s hand that is resting on his wrist. He moves his eyes from her hand to her face before averting his eyes, “There was other things.” Mikoto hums and the amusement is cut out from her face instantly, instead being replaced with something Toji can’t recognize for once.

Mikoto looks down at her drink and takes a long sip as Suit lifts her hand from his wrist, placing it on the table but still lightly holding it in between his fingers. He’s staring and tracing his fingers around hers, probably comparing the size and warmth of her seemingly delicate, pale hands. Have they held hands before or something? Teacher-student porn shit? He probably didn’t have the guts but he definitely thought about it.

Suit starts to stand, “I should go now, it’s getting quite late.” She looks up and replies, “Is it?” He pauses and looks at her for a long time before releasing his hand from hers. He can’t really see their full faces from this angle only the sides, he wonders what face Fuji is wearing, but he knows that he’s getting lost in those pitch black eyes like so many others do. “If I didn’t, would you stay?” Mikoto eyes widen for a split second and Toji can hear from her tone how she’s going blank again, yet her heart is beating faster in contrast, “No.” Fuji gives her a small, sad smile. “It was nice to see you again.” He starts in a low, melancholic voice, “You are a beautiful woman and my precious student Uchiha-chan, so…I think I’m gonna go home to see my wife tonight.”

Mikoto gives him a nod and he leaves. She stays at the bar finishing her drink before turning her head and staring directly at him. For once she doesn’t have a cold mask on or her usual expression of teasing indifference and exasperation whenever they talk to each other. She gives him a nod and begins to stand to leave and….he doesn’t know why but he decides to follow her. They don’t leave together, usually leaving with other people at random times in the night, and barely acknowledging each other when they decide to dip knowing that they’ll probably see each other throughout the month anyways. But for some reason he stands to follow her and ignores how the waitress on his lap yelps, before throwing some bills on the table.

He finds her standing outside in the alleyway, lighting another cigarette. She passes the box and her lighter to him and they smoke together for a couple minutes, before he breaks the silence. “He doesn’t really seem like your type” Mikoto actually snorts, “I know.” Toji scoffs and inhales the cigarette, “If you pushed a little harder or pretended better, he probably would’ve actually slept with you.” She doesn’t respond to this and instead stares into the smoke blowing out from her mouth.

“So why him?” He doesn’t know why he gives a shit but for some reason, he feels the need to fill this silence for once and simply blames it on curiosity. She is silent for awhile, and before, he would just think she’s a bitch for not responding and simply using a mask of indifference to change the conversation completely but, he sees now, how she’s turning the gears in her head for an actual response. Finally she says, “He’s strong.”

She starts to laugh at his disgusted expression and furrowed eyebrows at her fucking ridiculous reason. Her laugh sounds like bells and he subconsciously keeps in his mind, that this is the first time he’s ever heard her actually laugh. Her laughs die down but her lip twitches upwards, even though her face turns wistful. “He’s strong in like…an honest way. He genuinely believes in the notion of morals and justice. Humans are the same everywhere. Even in the civilian world it’s hard to find someone so earnest. For a brief moment, he made me feel like a regular high school girl and…”

She inhales the last dredge of the cigarette before dropping it on the ground, and she turns to fully face him. Green meets pitch black. For the first time since they met, Toji can see that Mikoto has showed him a sliver of an honesty within her personality. She has a small smile on her face but her onyx eyes are clouded with resignation and somber. “I think that is probably the best, people like us can get in this world.”

Zenin Toji repeats and analyzes her words in his head.

For a brief moment he made me feel like a regular high school girl.

He tries to imagine it along with all the information he’s learned about her from tonight. Born in the shitty ass Zenin clan and raised in isolation along with the rest of the Jujustu world, he has no fucking clue what civilian high school is like. He knows there’s locations of Jujustu High but even that makes more sense than civilian high school. Uchiha Mikoto is the ‘Bloody Kitsune’, a renowned mercenary and assassin. She’s around his age and would at least be considered a semi-special grade sorcerer with her skillset and cursed energy reserves, not including those bloody eyes. She wears a clan symbol embroidered in her clothes, and from how she acts she’s clearly clan-raised, but he has no clue what fucking clan. Other than mercenary jobs she’s not involved in Jujustu society at all. How the fuck was she just living a completely normal civilian life before? Where did she come from? Who trained her?

He’s earnest.

I think that’s the best people like us can get in this world.

People like us.

Onyx eyes clouded in somber and resignation.

People like us.

Rage and flashes of the fucking disciplinary pit race through his mind. Eyes staring at him in disappoint and anger. Being shoved in the back of the room and sitting in silence. No cursed energy. Useless. Monkey. A claw cutting through his lip in a dark room that he has to stare at every single time he looks in the mirror. People like us. What the actual fuck is that supposed to mean? You’re not a monkey. You’re almost a special grade sorcerer. You could probably rival the Six Eyes. You’ve never been pounded into the dirt simply for existing. You’ve never eaten the leftovers of others. You’re probably a fucking princess in your clan. How could you ever be categorized as “us”?

Toji scowls and starts to open his mouth to dismiss this dumbass woman, when he comes head-to-head with pitch black eyes. When Mikoto is scanning the perimeter on top of lamp posts or roofs, on nights when the moon is full and bright, further contrasting her dark hair against the porcelain kitsune mask-allowing Toji to only see and secretly freak out- about how the only colour in the night sky is her spinning blood red eyes. It’s a consistent curiosity about the ability of her eyes and how it surrounds her technique, but he eventually got used to them over the past year.

What does tend to catch him off guard is her regular eyes. It’s like staring into an abyss, which along with her skillset, seems to always notice him and consistently say, “I see you”. The all-seeing abyss is staring back at him now and he finds himself closing his mouth.

Zenin Toji really looks at the woman standing in front of him. It takes a lot but he thinks he can finally imagine it when looking at Mikoto. He can fully say that he hates everyone in the Jujustu world. He hates this fucking world because the minute he was born, he was deemed as nothing more than a useless, monkey. He hates that it took him so long to leave the Zenin clan. Toji will always remember when he beat his brother and stood amongst the fallen Zenin cannon folder who tried to stop him from leaving with all their prized weapons and money. It took less than ten minutes to rob them and fight everyone. The fucking monkey of the clan crushed them into the dirt and it only took ten minutes and nineteen years.

Nobody sane chooses to be a sorcerer and the same could be said about joining the underworld. At least now as the Sorcerer Killer they have a valid reason for hating him. Naobito’s words burn in his mind, “You were born a monkey and you will die a monkey.” Toji has long accepted that he was born an outsider and will die an outsider. And now he works and is smoking in an alleyway while looking into the eyes of another outsider. He ignores the weird disarray of feelings of camaraderie and hope in his chest. He can’t afford those types of useless thoughts and feelings. It’s stupid to even try. It’s too dangerous to even hope for more in his life.

As weird as it is, he can see a young Mikoto wearing masks everyday in her boring civilian life and having someone earnest and simply good, try to see the best in them. Even if it’s all a lie, just having someone that allows them to be a normal person for once. Not a killer or a sorcerer or a monkey, just a simple person. Toji is a liar and is probably classified as scum to most people, but he doesn’t think that he could lie to himself about this and pretend that as a kid he probably wouldn’t develop some sort of attachment to someone that actually treated him decently in the Zenin clan. There wasn’t anyone but he could imagine.

There was Naoya, and maybe at some point there was hope for his little cousin, but Naobito and the clan have sunk their claws too deep and now he’s just another spoiled simple brat. Naoya is talented and cunning when he’s not being a dick, and there was a strange hero worship he had for him. It made him even more pissed off because how does this tiny brat seem to acknowledge his existence but no one else does?

He realized that Naoya really was just an annoying ass kid, who was lonely enough to talk to the black sheep of the clan. In the only sliver of familial sense, Toji allowed himself to entertain his little cousin some days, occasionally kicking his ass and other days, just letting the brat talk to him about dumb stuff. He found himself not having a terrible day, even if the punishments for being near the clan heir were harsh. Toji remembers leaving and walking away from the compound, while Naoya watched him in anger and sadness, and for a split second he considered asking his little cousin if he wanted to join. He didn’t. Naoya is the prized prince of the clan since there’s no Ten Shadows, he has an actual life there. No like him. Toji thinks that Naoya is fucking annoying as hell, but he won’t deny that out of everyone in the clan, he hates the tiny brat the least.

So Zenin Toji feeling resignation and a storm of flashbacks in his body, simply nods when he meets Mikoto’s eyes. Mikoto gives him a small smile back, as they lean against the alleyway wall in silence, as he finishes his cigarette. He drops the cigarette butt on the ground and crushes it with his foot, “The drinks in this place weren’t fucking worth it.” Mikoto snorts again, “They really weren’t.” He turns his head towards her, “C’mon let’s get out of here” and pushes himself off the wall. She raises an eyebrow, “I don’t feel like going to another bar”.

He rolls his eyes and shoves one hand in his pocket, while using his right thumb to point down the street. “Me neither but there’s a movie playing soon, so let’s go.” Mikoto furrows her eyebrows, “Seriously?” He doesn’t bother replying and begins to walk down the street towards the theatre playing late night movies three blocks down, hearing her huff from behind him, confirming that she’ll follow him.

The city of Tokyo never fully sleeps and as they get further and further into the main streets, more and more people are walking by drunk and laughing, as the lights get brighter and cars start beeping. Japan is considered a small country but in the midst of all the chaos, Toji can’t imagine what it would be like to live in a larger one. He already slips through and disappears with ease here, and living in places like China or America seems more a hassle is anything.

They sneak into the movie theatres which isn’t hard as the teenage ticket handler is tired and bored. Somehow Mikoto leaves for the bathroom but comes back with a large bucket of popcorn and drinks. It’s an American movie, The Matrix that’s playing and since it’s late, him and Mikoto are the only ones in the theatre.

Zenin Toji finds himself eating snacks and commenting on the ridiculous fight scenes with Uchiha Mikoto at two in the morning. They fight over popcorn and laugh at Neo’s abilities and the martial arts references. He pretends that he understands Mikoto’s chatter about the soundtrack and apparently she approves of all the American bands that are being included. She rolls her eyes and agrees when he comments on how Trinity is hot. They both pretend that they are not enticed by the plot and futuristic setting, but halfway through the movie, Zenin Toji finds himself not denying that he is having fun with her.