Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

It was three days ago when Tachihara stopped responding. His inbox began to fill with missed calls and unread messages. His regular mission report was never sent. Nobody worried the first day. The man was unpredictable. Though it hadn’t happened often, no one would put it past him to go missing for a couple of hours. Maybe even days.

The second day is when people started to notice. He hadn’t contacted the hunting dogs in two days. No status updates, no emergency signals either. His weekly mission report was nowhere to be seen. He hadn’t alerted anyone about this absence. Just disappeared.

Teruko was surprised to see the message from the base. She had been sent out on a mission a few days earlier and hadn’t yet completed all of her tasks. Yet they were already calling her back?

She stepped into the meeting room to find she was alone with the commander. The space was cold and felt slightly tense even though both of them tried to pretend it didn’t.

“Apologies for the abrupt change, Jouno and Tecchou are both deployed on important missions and yours seemed the least urgent.” The commander spoke calmly like always, not letting even a hint of concern etch itself into his perfect smile.

“It is more than alright, commander. What do you need from me?”

“Well, Tachihara seems to have gone MIA for the past couple days, I would like you to find him and report back with him so we can have a chat.” He smiled even wider, making the previous statement seem even more ominous than it already did.

“Of course, commander. I will find him and return as soon as possible.”

“Thank you, Teruko.” The girl briskly walked out of the meeting room and farther into the base to gather the necessary information to find Tachihara.

She accessed the tracker that was coded into his phone and it showed that it was at his apartment. Seeing this, she changed into her civilian clothes so as to not draw suspicion and aged herself up to around 20 years old. She carefully hid her weapons in her bag and her belt that was meticulously covered by an oversized sweater. She planned to visit his apartment hoping that Tachihara would be there or at the very least some clues about his whereabouts. Teruko grabbed the copy of his keys and set off into the city.

-

“Hey, has anyone seen Tachihara?” Higuchi wandered into the room where all but one of the black lizard commanders sat.

“Not recently, why?” The older man sat comfortably on the couch reading a book and sipping a cup of tea.

“The boss has a mission for you guys tomorrow and wants you to have a meeting to discuss plans.” She shifted her weight from one foot to the other as she stood in the doorway, preparing to continue her search elsewhere.

Gin held up a pad of paper with the words, ‘have you tried calling him?’ scrawled across it in big letters.

“I tried a few times but he didn’t pick up, I guess I could just try again later. Tell me if you see him.” The blonde girl left the room slightly annoyed and the remaining two looked at each other trying to decide whether to continue the conversation or let the room fall back into comfortable silence.

“Now that I think about it, I haven’t seen the lad in a few days, where has he been?”

‘I don’t know. I haven’t heard from him either.’

“That’s kind of strange, he’s usually in here causing a ruckus around this time.”

‘Maybe he’s sick?’

“Possibly.” The man replied, worry tugging at his stomach ever so slightly. The young man may be strong but it was out of character for him not to make an obnoxious appearance by now. He couldn’t help but worry even if he knew it was most likely unwarranted.

-

The afternoon sun fell upon Yokohama, lighting up the sky with such vibrant colors that it was hard to believe they were natural. A soft breeze carried, ruffling the leaves of nearby trees ever so softly. Her long, bright red hair swayed in the wind as she approached the tall building. She entered and walked up to the elevator doors, clicking the button to open them and stepping inside. She clicked the button with the number 8 on it and it lit up as the elevator started rising. It lurched to a stop at her destination and she stepped out into the hall.

She had only been here once before, it was when Tachihara needed some files from base dropped off and she had been assigned to take them to him. She walked down the hall before stopping in front of a door and using the spare key to unlock it.

The apartment wasn’t big but it definitely wasn’t the smallest she had ever seen. It was mostly plain save for a few random pieces of decor scattered around randomly. There were dishes in the sink and laundry on the floor. It was definitely lived in at least at some point.

She knocked on the closed bedroom door and entered after not receiving a reply. There she found his phone sat on the nightstand, buzzing over and over with unanswered messages.

Teruko continued her search, determining that Tachihara was in fact not in his apartment and probably hadn’t been in at least a couple of days. Left out food was in the early stages of spoiling, the bed was left unmade, and the majority of his belongings remained, scattered around the rooms. She searched the apartment, getting slowly more and more annoyed at the lack of leads. She looked in cabinets, leaving them open to mark the ones she had already searched. She opened drawers, pulling out items and leaving them on the floor for Tachihara to pick up when he returned.

Nothing.

Not a thing that gave her any information.

She left, his phone in hand and no idea where he could have gone.

-

It had now been three days since anyone had seen Tachihara. Not the hunting dogs, nor the port mafia had any idea of his whereabouts. After Teruko returned to base, unsuccessful, the commander decided to have the government send out another team to hunt him down. Teruko was reassigned to the mission she was on previously but she still secretly hoped that she would see him walking down the street, unaware of all of the chaos he was causing. Though the chances of that happening were slim to none, she still looked out every window she could and peered down every alleyway she passed.

Back at the port mafia headquarters, the black lizard commanders were being pulled into a meeting with the boss, Higuchi, and Akutagawa. They were supposed to be heading out for their mission right around then but due to the absence of a certain fake redhead, it was reassigned and they sat with the boss discussing what to do.

“I am so glad that most of you could make it to this meeting today, I’m assuming you all know why you’re here?” Everyone in the room silently nodded, prompting the boss to continue.

“Alright then, let’s start, shall we? When was Tachihara last seen and by who?”

“Gin and I last saw him three days ago I believe, we were completing our mission report from the day before. We haven’t heard from him since.” Hirotsu answered, recalling them all lounging in their office while Gin typed up the report.

“So he was last seen on Monday, today is Thursday, and he hasn’t answered a single message that has been sent.”

“That is correct.”

“Well then, Gin, could you visit his apartment and see if he’s there? Hirotsu, check the security cameras to see which way he went when he left. Higuchi, check around the office and ask if anyone has seen him recently. Akutugawa, go monitor the team that is replacing the black lizard in their mission today. Everyone, report back to my office when your tasks have been completed.” After the boss finished, everyone left to start on their various assignments.

-

Gin made her way to the address she had been given, riding the subway for a few minutes before walking to a large apartment building and stopping in front of it. The building was nothing special, it looked like every other building in Yokohama. She entered and rode the elevator up to the eighth floor, just as Teruko had done the day previous. She found the correct room number and knocked on the door three times. She waited for a moment before trying the door handle and swinging the door open easily. She was slightly surprised at the fact the door was left unlocked, you’d think that being in the mafia would make you a little more cautious than that.

She was even more surprised to find that all of the cabinets were open and things were strewn all around. Against her better judgement, she decided to explore the disheveled apartment, making sure not to trip over any of the things that littered the floor. Perhaps he had been robbed? That seemed like the most logical explanation, though he may have just been a slob. But that still wouldn’t explain his sudden absence.

Was he kidnapped? Unlikely, he would be hard to take and who would want to kidnap him anyway. She certainly wouldn’t. Most of the valuables in the apartment seemed to be intact, but she could say that with certainty considering she had never been inside before. But the TV and some jewelry were still there and she couldn’t imagine he had much more of value than that. So being robbed wouldn’t exactly make sense either.

This trip had confused her more than it helped. Why would his apartment be this messy then? Unless there was someone else looking for him too. Someone he didn’t want to find him. The gears turned in her head as she made the trek back to headquarters to inform Mori of her findings.

-

When she stepped into his office, she found that she was the last to arrive other than her brother, who would be gone for at least the rest of that day.

“Higuchi, why don’t you start?” The boss smiled at the blonde with that same unnerving smile he usually wore.

“No one has seen him since Monday when he left that night.” She said seriously.

“The cameras show that he headed towards the subway station when he left. He could have gone anywhere,” Hirotsu added. The boss sat in thought for a moment before looking to Gin to hear her report. That black haired girl stood for a moment, considering writing out her response, but decided that it would take too long to write out all she had to say.

“When I knocked, there was no response, so I tried the door and it was unlocked so I went in. He wasn’t there but all of the cabinets and drawers were opened and there were a bunch of things all over the ground. It didn’t look like he had been robbed so I’m guessing that someone else got there before me and forgot to lock the door behind them.”

“That is peculiar. Why do you assume that it wasn’t just a robbery?” The boss replied curiously.

“Most of the valuable things in the apartment seemed to be there. It looked like the perpetrator didn’t find what they were looking for.” The girl continued, recounting her observations.

“Who would be looking for Tachihara though? He spends most of his time here, I doubt he has time for friends or personal relationships.” Higuchi wondered aloud and the room sat in silence for a moment. Who would be looking for him other than the mafia?

“His day off is tomorrow, he usually claims to be visiting family, maybe his family has a key to his apartment and went to check on him?” Hirotsu proposed to the group.

“But would his family really ransack his whole apartment like that? It’s only been a couple of days and if he only visits them once every two months, could they really be that close?” Higuchi countered. The room fell back into silence, considering the possibilities.

“Alright, here’s the plan,” the boss spoke suddenly, bringing the attention of the room back to him, “spend the rest of today and tomorrow finishing paperwork and all other assignments. If he doesn’t reappear by Saturday morning, we will send out a search team to find him.”

“Yes, boss.” Hirotsu nodded and they all left for their respective offices. Upon arrival, Gin turned to the older man and began to write on her pad of paper.

‘Do you think that Tachihara is trying to escape the mafia?’ The question hung heavy in the air. Everyone knew what happened to traitors and it wasn’t pretty to say the very least.

“I’m not sure. I don’t think he would do that but I also didn’t think he would ever just disappear like this.” Hirotsu finally replied.

The both of them sat in a somber silence for most of the rest of the day, breaking it a few times to ask the other to pass a paper over.

Chapter Text

The Friday sun was beginning to set, signaling to many across Yokohama that the week was now concluded and that they could finally relax. Soft pinks and yellows painted the skyline as the sun slowly disappeared for the night with a promise it would return the next day. Cars were a distant whisper from where he sat. The once bustling afternoon streets had now calmed to the occasional rumble of an engine drowned out by the sound of crashing waves. Wind ruffled his hair softly, but it was not noticeable. It carried the gentle and refreshing scent of salt water and incoming rain along with a harsh early spring chill. The wood under his hands was rough and riddled with splinters that stabbed into his skin. Not that he could feel it anymore anyway.

His nerves were the first to fail him. It started in his fingertips. Losing the ability to feel texture. Surfaces that once had grooves and imperfections now seemed to be perfectly smooth. Things that looked to be sharp, dulled in an instant as they touched his skin. When he could no longer feel pressure, it made it hard to gauge how tightly he was holding anything. Things would slip from his grip randomly and clatter to the floor. That one was annoying. When the nerves had fully died, pain seemed to go with them. It was too bad the peeling had started before it could reach past his arms.

Skin that had once been plump and full of life, started to flake and dry out. He could only hope that it would fall off before it started cracking. When patches didn’t flake off layer by layer, they would continue to dry out until cracks started to form and blood would seep out of the openings. The tears in the skin were comparable to getting a split lip but bigger and just as uncomfortable.

His muscles had begun to stiffen, starting in the face and working their way down. Though he was still breathing, the red blood cells in his body were dying in rapid succession. Cells that had multiple months left were being destroyed in minutes. This caused the muscles to stiffen slowly as they died. Rigor mortis was trying to take him alive and it was winning.

But the nausea was what hit him hardest. Combined with the persistent headache that hadn’t left him alone since Tuesday, it made it almost impossible not to give in and run back to the hunting dogs begging for forgiveness. He was dizzy, disoriented and constantly stumbling trying to keep from falling over and dying on the spot.

It had taken a lot of effort to make his way back onto mafia territory and even more to sit down on the edge of this dock without falling in and drowning, on purpose or not. But here he sat. After years of lying to himself and others, here he sat. And this is where he would be sitting when it finally all ended. After months of deliberation and planning, he chose this spot to be where his life would come to a close. It was quiet at night, deserted other than him really, and the view was beautiful. Not that he was ever really one to appreciate nature. It was as comfortable as it could possibly be and it was more than he deserved.

Footsteps were heard behind him. He didn’t turn and look as he usually would, moving his head at all had become a chore and if this was how he would meet his end, it would most likely be merciful.

“We’ve been looking for you.”

The older man sat beside Tachihara, silver hair blowing in the breeze. He received no more than a ‘hmm’ as a response. The young man appeared worse for wear, eyebags forming purple sacks under his eyes. Stubble grew on his chin and it looked as if keeping his eyes open was a chore. It looked as if keeping his body upright at all was a chore.

“You haven’t responded to any of our messages, nor have you been in your apartment.”

“Lost my phone.” The man mumbled, voice barely above a whisper. Hirotsu, once sitting around a foot away from Tachihara, shuffled closer so the younger man could rest his head on his shoulder. He wrapped an arm around Tachihara’s shoulders and could feel him shaking ever so slightly. Tachihara closed his eyes for a moment hoping that sleep would take him, but soon remembered his decaying body and gave up on the idea.

“Would you like me to take you back to your apartment so you can get some sleep?”

“No.” The response was quicker than any of the others he had received. It was harsh and final.

“Alright.” A few moments passed in silence as the sun disappeared fully leaving them with only moonlight to see the ocean stretched before them.

“I am a spy for the government.” The words were sudden and unexpected. He himself was surprised at the unexpected honesty, originally he was planning to disappear quietly. He was going to ghost both the mafia and the government and let the effects of the missed strengthening surgery take him. When he finally passed, he would let the ocean take him, never to be seen again and preserving the hopefully fond memories his mafia counterparts carried of him. He would die knowing that they didn’t think of him as just a lowly traitor, but as a coworker, maybe even a friend. But when Hirotsu found him sitting on the edge of the doc, all of that went straight out the window. He would now die knowing the people he had grown to treasure most would remember him as a failure. A cautionary tale that you never really could trust the people you’re close to.

No one moved for a while. The muscles in Tachihara’s face were becoming more stiff with each passing moment. He knew that his next words would most likely be his last. He wasn’t sure if he was okay with that.

“I’m sorry.”

That was all he could come up with. No heartfelt speech. No convincing Hirotsu not to hate him forever. Short and ever so sickly sweet.

As his vital organs shut down, he fell into unconsciousness. Not from sleep deprivation, simply from lack of oxygen to the brain. He was slowly suffocating to death as his limp body was lifted from the doc and carried to the port mafia infirmary. Hirotsu ran as fast as his aged body could take him through the streets of Yokohama. Street lamps provided his only source of light other than the dim twinkle of the moonlight. When he arrived, he passed the unconscious boy to the nurses and took a seat in the waiting room.

He dialed Gin’s number, hoping she would pick up despite the fact that work hours had ended. When he heard the gentle click of an answer, he said only to ‘come to the hospital and come quick.’

Tachihara’s short life did not end on that doc.

Chapter Text

Tachihara’s life did end on an operating table at the port mafia infirmary. At the age of 19, Tachihara Michizou died due to an illness unknown to the doctors. He was already gone by the time he had entered the hospital in Hirotsu’s arms. He was pronounced legally dead at 8:24 PM and his body was brought to the morgue by 8:32.

The air in the waiting room was stale and quiet. Many mafia members didn’t have families to be waiting for them. The small remainder who did were most likely disowned years beforehand. Gin and Hirotsu sat in uncomfortable chairs tapping their respective shoes nervously against the linoleum. The moment the nurse rounded the corner both of them were already on their feet, ready to visit Tachihara, ready to be reassured by the beeping machines that kept his heart going for a little longer before it could take over and continue beating on its lonesome. The grave look on the nurses face wasn’t doing anything to make them feel better.

“My apologies, what he had was not something we have the ability to treat.” The nurse said, voice low and somber.

The two black lizard commanders stood, processing the fact that no, there were no beeping machines. There would be no more late nights in their shared office, making tea and chatting about everything and nothing. There would be no more inside jokes, conveyed by only a look in the other’s direction. There would be no more kicking each other under the table at long, boring meetings with the boss.

And there was nothing anyone could do about it anymore.

-

There was no funeral. When Higuchi tried reaching out to the family that he supposedly visited every day off, the only answer was ‘about time’ before she was hung up on. They held a small ceremony at the office, ten people showed up maximum. Considering how loud and outgoing the man was, he didn’t seem to have many meaningful connections with anyone in the mafia other than people he worked with constantly. It was almost as if he was trying not to get attached.

His replacement was fine. She was just as loud and obnoxious as Tachihara had been. She was just as likable if not more. She brought them cookies on her first day. No matter how nice she was, she would never fit in. No matter how good in combat or how responsible she tried to be, she would never be Tachihara.

Either way, life would go on, whether it left Tachihara behind or not.

-

The work day had come to a close and Gin walked down the busy streets of Yokohama alone. Today she had decided to walk the route back to her and her brother’s shared apartment as she had done many times before but had recently been avoiding. She was unsure why she was so hesitant to walk home recently rather than taking the subway. It wasn’t much slower and definitely more scenic, even if the scenery was only tall buildings and the occasional glimpse of the ocean.

She strolled down the sidewalk when an intense wave of deja vu hit her like a freight train. In front of her stood the apartment building she visited just four days before. It looked the same but she knew something was different. The eighth floor was slightly more empty than it had been in previous weeks. She didn’t have to go in to know that. And yet, there she stood. In the elevator. The button that corresponded to the eighth floor lit up like a light bulb when she pressed it and the elevator let out a loud groan as it lifted off the ground. A beep sounded as she ascended each floor. On the eight beep, the doors slowly opened and she stepped into the hall.

She stood outside his closed door, hoping it would still be unlocked but also too scared to test it. Finally she grabbed the handle and twisted it until a satisfying click indicated that the door was open.

Inside, there was nothing. Well, nothing is an overstatement, there was a couch and… a countertop, maybe nothing wasn’t that much of an overstatement. All of the things that littered that apartment floor just a few days prior were now nowhere to be seen. All that remained were a few pieces of large furniture and a singular piece of metal that seemed to have been dropped while whoever took everything was leaving. She stepped closer to the metal and bent down to pick it up. Upon further inspection, it seemed to be a military dog tag. She read the name on it as Tachihara Shunzen. Perhaps a father or brother? She turned it over to find the same kanji written over and over covering the whole back side of the dog tag. As the kanji was written farther down, it seemed to get increasingly more difficult to read as the lines looked sloppy and rushed. This unnerved her slightly.

She then suddenly remembered something. She had seen this dog tag before. During a mission a couple of months ago was the first time she had noticed it. It had slipped out from under Tachihara’s shirt while they were fighting an enemy. She hadn’t seen it clearly again after that but she had consistently noticed the chain that hung from his neck whenever they worked together from that point on.

She finished examining the piece of metal and made a decision. She left the abandoned apartment and made her way home with the only evidence of this event ever happening being the dog tag that now hung around her neck.

-

It was now late at night and as usual, Hirotsu continued to sit at his desk working on miscellaneous papers. As he finished the final one, he set his pen down and his mind began to wander. He thought back to that night on the doc. Tachihara was quiet when he said it but not so quiet that Hirotsu hadn’t heard exactly what he said. ‘I am a spy for the government.’ He had said it plain and simple as if he hadn’t just changed everything. With a few words, both of their worlds had fallen apart. The black lizard was like a family, this bond being part of the reason they were so successful. And to think that this whole time Tachihara had been sharing all of their deepest secrets with the very people who wanted to hurt them most.

This newfound betrayal was heartbreaking but also almost comforting. In his final moments, he had chosen to be truthful. He put the whole truth out there knowing that it could ruin Hirotsu’s mental image of him forever. And yet, he was truthful. For some reason, rather than hatred, this revelation caused Hirotsu to trust Tachihara more than he ever had before. If the younger boy were still alive and this information came out, that would be a different story. But the very fact that he decided to let everything out at his most vulnerable made Hirotsu feel emotions that he couldn’t put a name to.

Maybe he could keep one last secret for Tachihara.

Chapter Text

It’s me, I’m here. Not to give you a new chapter or anything, just to tell you that I have become my own greatest foe, someone who randomly stops updating their fics. Sorry about that, I’m just a girl with joint pain and shitty posture who is secretly a nerd because I think my friends would never let it go if I told them. Might continue one day if I ever have the time or motivation. No author curse here except maybe a sprained pointer finger that made it very difficult to aggressively tap the screen on my iPad. At this point I’m just trying to keep my scholarship to this fancy ass private school because apparently if I get any less than all a’s my whole family will explode or something.
Lowkey just wanted to complain so thanks for coming to my ted talk.

I will be back maybe probably hopefully.
- I still don’t know my username

Chapter Text

Days went on and the memory of a boy who had once infiltrated the mafia slowly faded in the minds of those who didn’t know him well. Memories of past interactions slowly dissipated and very soon there would be little to no evidence that the Tachihara family had two sons. Pictures of his childhood disappeared from the walls of his old childhood home, not that there were very many to begin with. Around the mafia, his existence soon became irrelevant, being replaced just after he ‘left’. In the hunting dogs headquarters, his name was like a curse, those who utter it would be reprimanded by the commander for speaking of the traitor.

“He did this to himself,” the commander would say, “there is no stopping a man so determined in what he believes even if his views of justice are skewed.”

The hunting dogs had heard this speech many times over, especially when their numbers had just dropped from five to four. Sure, he was a traitor, but he was also so much more than that. He was the fifth hunting dog, but more importantly a piece of the puzzle that held this organization together.

Without him, the others grew more distant. Teruko continued to fawn over the commander but with each reprimand regarding their fallen teammate, that admiration dimmed and a sense of resentment grew. She couldn’t understand how he could be so unaffected by the loss. One of her closest friends became nothing more than a teaching moment in her mentor’s eyes. A slip up in his perfectly crafted group. A simple reminder to not let his people get too attached.

When Teruko returned to his government-issued apartment, she took all of his belongings back to headquarters on the commander’s orders. As she left the now barren apartment, she turned back to say one last goodbye. As she shuffled out the door, all of Tachihara’s belongings in hand, one thing fell from the box that she carried. It clanked against the floor just quietly enough not to be heard by a severely distracted Teruko.

-

When Gin returned home that night, she was more quiet than usual, which was a difficult feat considering how quiet she usually was. She rushed straight to her room and only came out once to eat the meal Ryuunosuke had prepared.

She had been different since the death, not exactly sad but her eyes definitely took on a more somber appearance. They drooped at the corners, mirroring the corners of her mouth.

The relationship between the siblings had never been the closest, certainly not to the caliber of the Tanizaki’s but that was probably for the better. But now it was as if they had drifted even further apart. He really did want to help his sister with the obvious grief she was feeling but had no clue how to approach it.

Him and Tachihara knew each other, yes, but the relationship was strictly one of colleagues. The most he cared to remember of the man was the obnoxious personality trait of a constant need for conversation. They couldn’t simply sit in silence for more than a few seconds before Tachihara would start rambling on about something uninteresting. Truly unbearable.

Even if he were to attempt to comfort his sister, it probably wouldn’t go well considering his previous negative feelings towards the man. So instead he chose to stay quiet on the matter and let his sister figure out her feelings on her own. The one thing he couldn’t help but notice was the chain she now sported around her neck. He had seen the same one hanging from Tachihara’s neck in one of their previous uncomfortable interactions and made the connection instantly. It was sweet to see his sister honoring someone she clearly cared for, as much as he disliked the man.

Maybe Gin really was going to be okay.

-

It was three months ago when Tachihara’s heart stopped beating. His phone was shut off and the messages stopped coming. His mission reports to the mafia had been filled out by a new person, just as thorough as they had been when he was the one doing them. His life had come to an abrupt close, some left unsatisfied but accepting. But there was one last person left unaccounted for.

Gin had gotten her closure, carrying the old dog tag with her as a reminder of the friend who had left her behind. Teruko had continued on after leaving his apartment, keeping just one thing with her to remember him. Before handing over his belongings to the commander, she swapped her uniform hat for his. Sure it was slightly too big but it’s not like anyone noticed. Hirotsu swore to keep his secret for as long as he would live. His family promptly forgot about him and continued living their lives as they did before.

But Tachihara had one last person he needed to speak to before he was gone for good. The night before he went missing, he sent a letter addressed to a Yosano Akiko at the armed detective agency dorms.

Yosano received this letter exactly one day after Tachihara Michizou was pronounced dead. She ripped open the envelope while sitting on her old mattress alone in her room. The contents crinkled inside as she took out the letter to inspect its contents.

To my brother’s dearest angel,

My name is Tachihara Michizou and you served in the Great War with my brother, Shunzen. You may not know me yet but I certainly know you. I know you worked as a nurse for the soldiers, my brother sent letters about you talking about an angel who graced the battlefield. I know that you became a member of the armed detective agency after the war. I also know that you are the reason my brother is dead.

My brother was a man who many people cherished. Our parents adored him, his teachers would gush about the great things he would do one day. And yet, he never did get to do those things. Because of you.

Because of you a great man had his life ripped from his hands. Because of you my parents abandoned me and I had to live on the streets. Because of you my life was ruined and I had to join the mafia. Because of you the Tachihara family had one son.

And now because of you, they won’t have any sons.

I hope you live forever with the regret that you ruined the lives of a whole family and probably many more. I couldn’t get my revenge on you in this lifetime but I promise I will be back for you in the next.

Angel of death, I hate you.
Tachihara Michizou

Yosano dropped the paper as silent tears rolled down her face. The letter slowly fluttered down until it hit the floor where it would stay for a long while after that. She would spend nights awake staring at the ceiling wondering what could’ve been. If she hadn’t gone to the battlefield, would some of those soldiers have been living good lives? She would never know.

The worst were the nights she spent on the internet searching for relatives and records of the soldiers whose names she remembered. She felt guilty for not knowing all of the names of the soldiers who she had healed even though it would be impossible to recall them all.

The very first night when she searched the name of Tachihara Michizou, the first result had been an obituary for the day before. If only she had received the letter sooner, she could have stopped it. These thoughts continued for days on end. For every night after that day, she would never sleep soundly again. She would never sleep without the memory of a boy she had never known but affected so greatly.

Exactly what Tachihara wanted.