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Chapter Text

It was a Monday morning, bright and early, when Tsuruga Ren decided to enact his master plan, and when Mogami Kyoko realized that she’d lost her cell phone. 

When Ren had first returned from Guam to discover his manager had gotten his license, he hadn’t thought much of it.  He’d gotten so used to driving himself around that it was a little strange to ride in the back seat, but he guessed it was fine.  It hadn’t been until he’d really thought about the fact that Yashiro had also been acting as Kyoko’s temporary manager that he’d started to see the bright side.  If Yashiro was Kyoko’s manager too, then Ren would get to see her more.  They might even get to carpool!  Not to mention the fact that Kyoko would have someone else to look out for her when she went to auditions and to drive her around town so that hopefully she would ride her bike less.  And so he’d been more than happy to share his manager on a more permanent basis.

But Ren had also returned to Tokyo to another surprise.

Kyoko was avoiding him.  Ever since they had finished their roles of Cain and Setsu, Kyoko had been dodging him at every turn.  Not rudely.  Not overtly.  At first, he hadn’t even noticed.  It had started with an invitation to eat lunch when they’d run into one another at LME one afternoon.  He’d been sure that she would say yes, considering the fact that he was offering to eat food.  But Kyoko had begged off, telling him that she had a lot of Love Me work to catch up on, and that she’d already eaten.  She’d been so apologetic that he’d almost felt bad for asking.

Every invitation since had been met with similar rejection, and although he’d done his best not to show any emotion about it lest he freak her out and incite a string of apologies, he’d been hurt every time.  He had to wonder, had he done something?  Said something while they’d been Cain and Setsu?  Had he hurt her feelings or made her uncomfortable?  She’d seemed okay when he’d given her the stamp for helping him as Setsu.  In fact, she’d seemed happy to see him.  So what had he missed?  

Ren had decided that, no matter what had happened, it was going to change.  He couldn’t stand it anymore...not after Guam.  Not after being Corn with her, and not after living with her in a hotel room.  He’d thought that they were finally getting closer!  Like she was finally thawing towards him just a little.  It had been more than a year now since he’d met her again in Tokyo.  Almost a full year since he’d realized that he loved her.  At this rate, if everything went in his favor, maybe he’d get to confess to her by the time he was eighty.  But all of that was about to change.

Because he had a plan.  

This plan, like all good plans, had multiple stages spanning the next five years.  But the first part was this: Kyoko Mogami was going to accept him as a friend if it killed him.  Not a respected mentor.  Not a ‘god in the world of acting’ as she’d once said.  A friend.  

According to his manager, she was free this afternoon between 1 and 3. At some point in there, she had to eat lunch. He also just so happened to be free, thanks to Yashiro rescheduling a meeting for him  And so, he could start his plan today.

He just had to get her to agree. 

Ren had to fight the urge to fidget like a nervous little boy as he went over his plan again and again in his head from the back of Yashiro’s company car.  He was not nervous.  It would work.  It was a good plan!  And even if it didn’t lead to a confession, which at this point he doubted he’d be ready for any time soon anyway, at least he’d get to spend some time with her again.  And then he could figure out what was wrong…why she’d been avoiding him.  He still had a plan for his future…for his career.  Only after he had become an actor equal to his father would he take back his name.  And only when he was no longer Tsuruga Ren would he be able to have the kind of relationship he wanted with Kyoko…and that was assuming she even felt the same way.  In the meantime, though, if Kyoko was able to consider him as a friend instead of someone to be feared and worshipped, then the rest, when it came, would be a lot easier.

Yashiro pulled up to the side of the Darumaya, the two of them turning automatically toward the employee entrance in the alley.  The little clock on the dashboard told them it was 6:55, but if he knew Kyoko, she’d be out in less than thirty seconds.

But thirty seconds passed.  And then sixty.  And then another sixty.

“She’s usually out by now…” Yashiro murmured, glancing at his phone.  Ren did the same, then looked back at the door.  A couple walked past the car, disappearing into the Darumaya, but otherwise, the street was quiet this early, the occasional car driving by.  

Ren glanced at his phone, then back at the door.  7:02.  And for anyone else, this wouldn’t be cause for alarm.  But this was Mogami Kyoko.  “And she knew you were picking her up?”

“We confirmed it last night.”  His manager turned, glancing uncertainty over his shoulder at Ren.  “Do you think everything’s okay?” 

“I’ll text her,” Ren decided, tapping out a quick message to her phone.  

“Good morning, Mogami-san. We’re here.”

Another minute passed with no answer, and he brought up her phone number, finger hesitating over the call button.  He didn’t want to freak her out.  He knew all too well how guilty she would be if she thought he was upset with her.  But he also couldn't help worrying.  Would it be better, he wondered, to go inside after her?  Maybe ask her landlords if she was alright?

Before he could decide, the car door opposite him was yanked open, and their manager jumped so high he practically hit his head on the ceiling.  Ren couldn't hide his smile of relief when her teary face appeared, her whole body heaving as she panted for air.

“Good morning, Mogami-san,” he greeted, putting his phone down as she climbed into the seat beside him.

“I’m so sorry, Tsuruga-san!  Yashiro-san!”  

Really the fact that this girl could execute a perfect dogeza in the back seat of a car was sort of impressive.  Still, he shook his head, placing his hand under her forehead and lifting her up.  What kind of image must this girl have of him if she thought he was going to be angry about three minutes?  “It’s okay, Mogami-san.  It was only a few minutes.”

“But…but what if I had made you late and…and destroyed your perfect record?”

He smiled, trying to calm her down by teasing her, which, in retrospect, never seemed to work.  “I have a record?”

“Of course!  You’ve never been late!”

“I assure you, Mogami-san, I have in fact been late to things before.”  

Yashiro pulled onto the street, chuckling to himself as she finally sat up and put her seat belt on.  “You don’t have to worry so much, Kyoko-chan.  We’re still going to arrive at the studio with plenty of time.”

She bit her lip, and Ren noticed for the first time that her eyes were a little red, her expression more distraught than he thought was warranted for being three minutes late...at least, if he knew his Kyoko expressions.  And by now, he thought he should.  Hoping he wasn’t overstepping, he decided to just ask, being careful to choose every word so she didn’t think he was angry with her or upset with her or feeling any kind of negative emotion whatsoever.  “Mogami-san, is everything okay?  Did something happen this morning to make you late?”

She worried her lower lip between her bottom teeth as she sat up, looking around the car for a moment, then leaned in as if sharing a secret.  “I can’t find my phone.”

Of all the things he’d been expecting her to say with such a serious face, that wasn’t one of them.  “You lost your phone?”

She nodded miserably, looking as though she were once more on the verge of tears.  “Yes! I’ve been looking all morning but I can’t find it!”

He thought for a second.  “When did you have it last?”

“Um...yesterday evening I worked a shift at the Darumaya, and my kimono doesn’t have pockets, so I left it in my room.  Or...I thought I did.  I didn’t see it when I went upstairs after our last customer left, but I just assumed I’d put it in my purse, and I went to bed...but it wasn’t in my purse either!”

“Could someone have taken it from your room?” Yashiro asked, concern coloring his voice.  Ren felt a spike of anxiety.  Could someone from the public get into her room? 

She shook her head thoughtfully.  “I...I don’t think so.  The door that leads to our living quarters upstairs is usually locked.  And nothing else was missing from my room.  I don’t really have anything valuable but still...it seems like if someone wanted to take something from my room, they’d take my purse.”

Grateful she didn’t know how much he’d paid for ‘Princess Rosa,’ Ren tried to put her at ease.  “You can just ask LME for a new phone,” he assured her.  “It happens sometimes.  It won’t be a problem to get it replaced.”

She bit her lower lip, still looking worried, and Yashiro chimed in.  “That’s right.  Ren had to have his replaced just last year.”

Ren shot him a look, but quickly forced a more neutral expression when Kyoko looked at him, wide-eyed.  “Tsuruga-san, you had to replace your phone?”

“Yes.  It wasn’t difficult.  I just asked my department head and I was able to get a new one the next day.”

“But...but why?”

“He was careless,” Yashiro put in, helpfully forgetting to mention that he had been blackmailing Ren for information on Kyoko’s past and when Ren had refused to negotiate with a terrorist, Yashiro had destroyed his phone.  

“You?”  she asked in a near whisper.

He hated the reverence she spoke of him with sometimes.  Still, he thought, maybe after the plan, she’d look at him with something else.  Friendship.  Or at least a lack of fear.  Or worship.  With a tired smile, he nodded his confirmation.  “Me.  I was careless.  I got a new phone.  I’m more careful now.”  

“Oh.”  She sat back, nodding seriously to herself as if rearranging her entire worldview. 

“How was your weekend, apart from that?”

“Um...it was nice.  I just studied scripts and worked at the Darumaya.”

“You don’t get to work there very often anymore, do you Kyoko-chan?” Yashiro-san piped up, obviously trying to keep her talking to help Ren out.  

“No, only on evenings and weekends really.  I feel bad...they don’t charge me very much in rent, and part of the agreement was that I’d work in exchange for room and board.  So I try to help whenever I can.”

“Do you like working there?” Ren wondered.

“Yes, although we get busy on the weekends.  Taisho just hired a new chef to help keep up.  There are a few regulars that come every Sunday, and they’re usually very friendly.”

Part of Ren wanted to know exactly how friendly they were talking, but he held himself firmly in check.  Maybe he could stop by.  In disguise.

“What about you, Tsuruga-san?  Did you have a nice weekend?”

He couldn’t help beaming down at her, her little smile warming his heart.  Sometimes he would get glimpses of how he thought it would be if they were more...if she didn’t just see him as her (a little too, in his opinion) respected mentor.  And those glimpses kept him going.  

“I did, thank you.”  All he had to do was start talking about one of the interviews he’d done on Saturday and she lit up, asking seemingly endless questions with a bright, eager expression.  Ren didn’t think he’d ever enjoyed talking to someone like this.  He thought that if she let him, he could talk to her for hours.  Hell, he’d love to talk more about her weekend, but she always redirected the conversation back to him any time he tried.

They were pulling up to LME when Ren finally got up the courage to ask his question.  She was just grabbing her purse when he spoke up.  “Mogami-san, would you be willing to meet me for lunch today?  I’m free anytime between 12 and 2.  There was something I needed to talk to you about.”

For a second, he could have swore there was a blush rising to her cheeks, her eyes darting away from his, and he was sure she was going to refuse.  Again.

But she didn’t.  Because she actually wanted to have lunch with him?  Or because she felt like she couldn’t say no to him?  

“Of course.  Would 1 o’clock work?  I’ll be finishing up some work in the Love Me room.”

“That would be perfect.  I can meet you there.”

And, with a too-bright smile, Kyoko bowed and promised to see him then.  

Ren did his best to focus on his work that morning.  He really did.  This wasn’t a problem he’d ever had before…not since coming to Japan anyway.  That had been part of the character he’d created for himself.  Tsuruga Ren was a consummate professional.  He always knew his lines and he was always able to get in character (except for Katsuki, but that was a one off) and he was always 100% focused on his job.

Only today, he very much wasn’t.  Today, it was a struggle to stop thinking about Kyoko…about how worried she’d been that morning.  About whether she’d be able to easily get a new phone.  About how she could have lost hers in the first place.  It wasn’t like her to be careless, especially with company property.  And finally, about if his plan would actually work.  Thankfully, his distraction didn’t cause any problems on set, so he was able to finish up his filming and Yashiro, while not exactly none the wiser, at least kept his comments to himself as he dropped him off at LME. 

“I’ll be at the Love Me room at 2,” his manager told him, smiling a little to himself and wandering off.

Feeling like he was in a race against the clock, Ren hurried to the cafeteria.  He didn’t know if she’d have already eaten, but he wasn’t about to chance it.  Besides, he hadn’t eaten, and he knew that she wouldn’t be open to having a real conversation with him unless she knew he was taking care of himself.  That thought made his chest ache pleasantly for a moment.  She cared that he took care of himself…that had to mean something , right?  Carrying the two bags of food down the hallway and walking as fast as was socially acceptable, Ren smiled at acquaintances and nodded to the occasional worker he saw.  He had a reputation to keep up, after all, and that reputation wouldn’t be helped by sprinting to the Love Me office.

He came to a halt right outside the door, taking a deep breath and hoping he didn’t look like he’d been rushing.  Smoothing his hair back, he rapped his knuckles on the door, fixing what he hoped was a neutral, friendly smile on his face.  Not three seconds later, she opened it, dressed now in that awful pink uniform.  “Oh…good afternoon, Tsuruga-san!” she chirped before seeming to spot the bags in his hand. 

He held one up.  “I brought lunch.  I hope that’s alright.”

Her eyes went wide, face seeming to go a shade whiter. “Tsuruga-san, you...you shouldn’t have….I mean, I could have bought my own lunch!”

He smiled down at her as she blocked the door until she seemed to realize what she was doing and practically jumped to the side.  

“Please…um…come in!  And let me repay you for lunch.”

“No,” he told her with a chuckle.  “You don’t need to repay me.”  He placed the two bags on the table, taking a seat and waiting for her to join him.  She did, but only after scanning the room as if looking for threats.  Or an escape.  That last thought made him wince a little.  Surely she wasn’t afraid of him!  They’d spent so much time together, both in character and out, and he thought that maybe, over the last year, they’d become something closer to friends than coworkers.  But every time he got his hopes up, she pulled away like she was afraid of being bitten.  

She slid into her chair, shoulders slumping when he placed a container of food in front of her.  “I hope this is okay,” he offered, and she shook her head.

“Of course it is.  But you didn’t have to…”

“Consider it a bribe,” he offered, once more trying to tease her.  

Her eyes went comically wide as they met his smiling ones.  “A…a bribe?” she asked, immediately dropping her eyes from his face.  He had to admit, it hurt his ego a little.  He’d always been considered handsome.  Now this girl, the one he was in love with, could barely stand to look at him.  

“Yes.  I…well, I wanted to ask you for a favor, if you don’t mind.”  

“Oh…”  she trailed off, opening her container when he did and murmuring the blessing as she snapped her chopsticks apart.

He took a bite of his food, chewing slowly to encourage her to eat in a strange reversal of roles, and she did after a moment. Finally, though, she couldn't seem to stand it anymore.  

“Um…Tsuruga-san…what…what kind of favor?”

“I was hoping you’d be willing to help me with something.”

Kyoko blinked in surprise, and he was sure she hadn’t suspected that.  She put her chopsticks down, tiling her head to the side.  “Me? Help you?” 

He nodded, watching her face slip into a mask of almost frantic determination. 

“Of course.  What can I help you with, Tsuruga-san?”

Ren smiled.  “I have a new offer for a guest role in a drama.  I’ll be playing a chef, and I’ll be expected to do some cooking on screen.”

Kyoko pressed her lips together, dropping her eyes, and he almost laughed at how hard she fought to keep a straight face, probably remembering the last time he’d cooked something for her.  

“It’s okay,” he chuckled.  “You can laugh.”

“No!  I mean…you’re the best actor in the world!” she cried, horrified.  “If anyone could learn to be a chef, it’s you!”

“Well, thankfully, I have a little while to prepare,” he told her, wishing she’d let him hop down from that pedestal she’d put him on.  As much as her good opinion meant to him, he’d have preferred being seen as an actual person.  Maybe even as a man.   “But that’s where the favor comes in.  I was hoping, if you had time, that you’d be willing to give me a few cooking lessons.”

“Cooking lessons?”

“Just the basics,” he assured her.  “To start, I’d like to be able to move confidently around the kitchen and prepare something simple.  Once I see the scripts, I’ll know exactly what I’m supposed to be making.  You’re the best cook I know.  I thought that if anyone could show me how to act as a professional chef, it was you.”

Eyes wide, Kyoko stared unseeingly at him for a moment, and not for the first time, he wondered what exactly went on in that head of hers.  Finally, she flinched a little, shaking her head and seeming to come back to the present.  

“I’m sure you could find…I mean, I’m happy to help, but you must know so many people and…”

“None better than you,” he repeated, unable to help the way he was smiling at her.  Sometimes he just couldn’t hold back anymore…couldn’t hide how he felt when he was lucky enough to get one on one time with her. Unfortunately,  her reaction to his expression during these times usually ranged from a faint blush, after which she quickly moved on, to what he could only describe as abject terror.  

Now she seemed stuck somewhere in between, cheeks faintly pink, her whole body frozen in place like if she just didn’t move, he might not see her.  

“Mogami-san?” he prompted gently, daring to smile a little.  

She blinked hard, seeming to reset.  “I…um…of course.  I’d be happy to help.”

“Are you free tonight?” It felt dangerous, pushing even this much, but she nodded after a moment’s hesitation.  

“Yes.  I’m scheduled for my sword fighting class at 2, and then another lesson at the stunt fighting gym at 4.  But I’m free after 6.”

“Perfect.  Yashiro can pick you up you a ride home.”

“You don’t have to…”

“It’s no trouble,” he insisted, cheering inwardly.  Phase one, it seemed, was off to a good start.  “Were you able to get your phone replaced?” he asked.

“Oh..yes.  Thankfully it wasn’t too difficult, and I can keep my phone number.  But I’ll need to input all of my contacts again.”

“Do you need my number?”

“I kept a contact book in my bag,” she told him, seeming a little sheepish.  “Just in case.”

“That’s a good idea.  I should probably do that too, just in case.”  He hesitated.  “And you’re sure you left your phone in your bedroom?”

“I thought I did…but I must have left it somewhere else.  I can’t believe I was so carefless…”

“It’s alright.  Accidents happen.  Can you lock your bedroom door?”

“Um…the door to my bedroom doesn’t lock, but the door to our living quarters does, and we’ve never had any trouble.  The only people with a key are my landlords and me.”  

He nodded, trying to untangle the knot of anxiety in his chest.  She was right, he was sure.  He was probably just being paranoid.

Chapter Text

Kyoko was not having a very good week.  

It had started with a lost phone.  She was sure she’d left it in her bedroom before her shift at the Darumaya the night before.  She remembered placing it on the little table where she kept Princess Rosa and her gifts from Yashiro-san and Moko-san!  She remembered!  And that morning, she’d been late!  Three whole minutes!  And worse than that, she’d left Yashiro-san and Tsuruga-san waiting!  She could have ruined his perfect record!  He hadn’t seemed too concerned about said perfect record…in fact, he’d seemed more concerned at the idea of someone coming into her bedroom.

But she hadn’t wanted him to worry about that…hadn’t wanted to let him know that she was also worried about that.  Because over the last few days, things had felt…strange.  Everything was fine while she was at work, and Yashiro-san usually drove when she needed to go between jobs or to and from work.  But at the Darumaya…something felt…off.  And when Yashiro-san had asked if someone could have taken her phone from her room, she hadn’t wanted to admit that the door hadn’t been locked the night before.

Or…it had been at the beginning of the shift.  Things had just gotten so busy, and she’d been tired and struggling to focus on carrying plates and chatting with regulars and the new cook and the delivery guy she hadn’t interacted with much before but who’d been a little too friendly, so if someone had somehow gone upstairs, she wouldn’t have seen them.  And when her shift had been over and she’d been heading upstairs to lay down and read over some scripts, she’d put her key in the lock, only for the door to push open with no resistance.  

But nothing in her room had been disturbed!  There was nothing missing, other than her phone, and what would anyone want with her cell phone?  It wasn't even one of the touch screen phones like Moko-san or Tsuruga-san had, just a flip phone. Besides, her purse had been where she always left it in the corner, not a single yen missing from her wallet.  Even her ID badge had been there, and that could have gotten someone into LME!  So she didn’t think it was a crazed fan mistaking her for a more popular celebrity.  

Still, her morning had been off to a stressful start, and then Tsuruga-san had been so understanding and gentle and warm and…

No.  Listing her favorite attributes about Tsuruga-san was not going to help.  Kyoko couldn't believe she’d agreed to this.  The whole point of avoiding him was to hide her feelings for him!  How was she supposed to do things like that when he was so kind and understanding and when he brought her lunch and when he asked for her help with something?  It’s not like she could have said no!  But every time he looked at her like that…heck, every time he spoke to her, her traitorous heart started beating too quickly, and her stomach clenched and her breathing got too fast, and she was afraid her stupid body was going to betray her.

And then he’d know.

He’d know that she’d turned into one of those pathetic girls that fell in love with him, and he’d be so disappointed and angry and then he’d never want to speak to her again!  And then she wouldn’t even get to have this with him!  He’d never want to spend time with her in the Love Me office and he wouldn’t want to carpool with her anymore and she might never see him again.  How would she survive something like that?  

“Mogami-san?”  His words brought her out of her thoughts and she looked up, surprised when he was standing closer than before.  The two of them were standing in his pristine kitchen, various knives, cutting boards, and vegetables laid out in front of them.  She’d decided to start with the basics and build from there, and so a simple stir fry was first on the agenda.  They had about two weeks before he’d actually be filming any cooking scenes, so that seemed like plenty of time, especially since she was sure he could learn anything in half the time it would take an ordinary human.  “Is everything alright?”

He was wearing a sweater and he looked so good and it looked so soft and she could so easily imagine what it would feel like against her cheek if he were to wrap his arms around her.  

“Yes, of course!  I’m sorry…we should get started!”  They’d picked up the ingredients in the grocery store in his apartment building, mostly for convenience since they’d both worked all day and had a limited amount of time to shop.  She’d tried not to be upset by the outrageous prices, and had offered to pay, only to be turned down immediately.  “The first thing we want to work on is cutting vegetables.  You’ll hold the knife this way,” she demonstrated, snapping into teaching mode and trying not to think about the heat of his body so close to hers, or the way he was watching her every move.  “And make sure to curve your fingers around the thing you’re cutting so you don’t cut yourself.  You always want to use a very sharp knife.  Dull knives are much more dangerous than a sharp knife,” she recited, remembering how she’d stood in the kitchen at the ryokan, listening to Sho’s father give her the same speech.

“How do you know if it’s sharp enough?”  

“You can use it to try and cut a piece of paper,” she explained.  “You’ve rarely used these, so they’re still sharp.  Do you have a knife sharpener?”

His blank look told her that he had no idea.  Had his kitchen been fully stocked when he’d moved in, she wondered, or had someone just bought everything for him?  A personal shopper?  Yashiro-san?

“I’ll look around for one later.  I guess rich people don’t have to worry about taking care of their things,” she muttered, shaking her head.

“What was that?” he asked, barely concealed laughter in his voice, and oh, that was dangerous too.  Laughing meant smiling and smiling meant the annihilation of even more of her grudges unless she just refused to look at him, which wasn’t a bad idea considering.

“Nothing.  These knives are sharp.  Here,” she offered, holding it out, and he took the knife, attempting to hold it the right way.  She immediately corrected him, moving two of his fingers and doing her best not to start blushing at the feeling of her hand under his.  This was a cooking lesson.  She had no reason to think anything of moving his hand so he was holding a knife correctly!  It was for his safety!  She couldn’t be the reason he got hurt!  He was Tsuruga Ren!  

For his part, Tsuruga-san seemed completely unaffected.  Of course he was, she scolded herself.  This was a cooking lesson!  It was completely professional!  He’d asked her to do him a favor and here she was, thinking about how handsome he was and how much she liked his smile!  And after everything he’d done for her!

“Like this?” he asked, voice too soft, his body too close to hers, and she nodded, swallowing hard.  

“Yes…um…that’s perfect!”  She took her own knife, holding a carrot and showing how she placed her fingers so she wouldn’t get cut, then, fighting a blush the entire time, placed his hand on his own carrot.  “Make sure to keep your fingers like this,” she told him, her hand pressing against the back of his.  “That way you won’t cut yourself.  Move your wrist like this…slicing, not just pushing down.  Let the knife do the work.  And try to make the pieces even.”

He didn’t have a full script yet, so he wasn’t entirely sure what types of things he‘d be cooking, but she figured it couldn’t hurt for him to learn how to cut vegetables.  But once he started cutting, she had to correct him several times, and by the end, her hands were covering his, her fingers guiding him, and she even managed to forget their closeness for a few minutes as she focused.

In the end, it took him almost an hour to get the hang of it.  One moment, her hands on his, he’d seem to be doing well.  Then she’d move her hands and his chopping would be almost as bad as before, the pieces of vegetables coming out uneven, despite his pinched brow of utter concentration.  When he finally managed to cut an entire radish into nearly even pieces, she applauded.

“Perfect!”  Well, not quite, but the way his face lit up made the white lie bearable, even if it hurt to look at him directly.  “See, this way they’ll cook evenly, and they look better.  Good job!”

“Thank you.  I’m sorry it took me so long.”  He looked almost embarrassed, which was just as endearing as his smile, and she waved her hands, shaking her head frantically.

“Oh no…don’t worry, please.  It took me years to learn!”  She didn’t mention that she’d been six at the time, but he gave her a knowing smile as if he’d read her mind.

“How old were you?  When you learned to cook?”

She scraped all of the vegetables together into a skillet, adding oil and placing it on one of the burners of the stove.  “Young,” she admitted.  “I grew up working at the ryokan where I lived.”  Where Sho’s mother had raised her to be a suitable partner for her son.  Where her mother had left her.  Where she’d learned so many skills she could use in her acting, but that had been taught to her so that she would be able to take over the ryokan.  With Sho.  

He was quiet for a moment, and when she glanced at him, he was staring down at the countertop.  “With the Fuwas?”  

There was none of the usual heat in his voice when he spoke about Sho, but she still proceeded with caution.  “Yes.  I lived with them from the time I was little.”  She added more oil as the pan heated up, deciding it would be safer to just change the subject.  “Would you like to watch?  I’m not sure if you’ll make a stir fry…”

“Yes.  Of course.”  He joined her at the stove, and conversation quickly turned to the food they were making, and how hot the burner needed to be, and what kinds of oil and sauce paired best with vegetables, and how long they needed to cook.  She dutifully explained it as best she could, and when they sat down to eat, she made sure to praise his vegetable chopping once more, remembering how she’d felt when the Fuwa’s had praised her cooking.  

He smiled, sitting cross legged across from her and looking so casual…when had she gotten so comfortable sitting with him in his home?  “You did most of the cooking, Mogami-san.”

“No!  You did a lot of it!  And you were doing really well by the end!  As long as you keep practicing, you’ll have it down in no time!”  She didn’t let herself linger on his smile…on how his whole face softened.  She couldn’t.  Instead, she turned back to the TV, watching the entertainment news channel he’d put on in the background until the food was gone, the two of them making small talk about work as they ate.

“Will you be at LME tomorrow morning?” he wondered at one point.  “Yashiro didn’t say anything about picking you up.  Do you need a ride?”

“No, I don’t go in until 10.  Moko-san and I actually have plans.”

“Oh yeah?” he asked, tilting his head and looking as though he really did enjoy hearing her tell him about her friend and her plans and he really was making her life difficult, not that she could ever tell him that.

“Yes.  We’re going jogging.  We’ve been training with the swordmaster and at the stunt gym, but she wanted to get more exercise, so she asked if I wanted to join her.”  Actually, she was pretty sure her friend had asked her to go jogging as punishment for the cake she'd made the last time they'd gotten together, but she was excited nonetheless.  

“Where are you going?”

“There’s a park nearby with running trails.  I can walk there from the Darumaya.”

He nodded, eyes dropping to his plate for a moment, and she got the feeling that he wanted to say something.  He didn’t though, just kept eating, and once they were done, he insisted on cleaning up, rolling his sleeves up and shaking his head when she tried to reach into the sink.  He stayed where he was, his arm blocking her, and if she’d wanted to reach any of the dishes, she would have had to touch him.  “You cooked, and you’re doing me a favor.  This is the least I can do.”

“You helped!”

“Besides, these are my dishes.”

“But I’m the one…”  She stopped mid sentence, heart stuttering when she caught sight of his face…when she saw the gentle smile he was aiming at the plate he was scrubbing.  It hurt, she thought with a wince, forcing her eyes away…it was too much.  And if he caught her staring, he’d surely be angry.  Or embarrassed.  Or fed up with her.  And that thought hurt even more.  Instead, she grabbed a clean washcloth and began cleaning the countertops, even the ones they hadn’t used, just to have something to do with her hands.  “Um…when would you like to have another lesson?”

He paused, and she felt his eyes on her.  “How about Friday?  I’ll be finished with work around 8.  I know it’s late…”

“I’m not finished until 9, but I can come over after?”

“How about I pick you up?  Will you be at LME?”

“TBM actually.”  It was only as the words were coming out of her mouth that she realized what she was saying…and why she would be at TBM.  “But you don’t have to pick me up!  I can take the bus or…”

“It’s no problem,” he assured her, not seeming to note the panic in her voice.  “Is it a regular job?”

“A Love Me Assignment,” she told him, fighting to keep her voice level.  “Top secret.”

“Ah.  From the President, then?”

Kyoko just smiled, deciding that was as good a story as any.  Adding Bo to this situation was the absolute last thing she needed.  Then he’d have two things to be angry with her about.  She didn’t bother insisting that she could just take the bus home…that argument had never worked before and she doubted it would work now.  Instead, she joined him in the elevator and then watched the city go by as he drove, biting back multiple apologies for inconveniencing him.  And once they got to the Darumaya, he even got out of the car and walked her to the side door in the alley, his hands in his pockets, the picture of casual.  

“Thank you again for your help, Mogami-san.  I hope I’m not putting you out.”

Wide-eyed, she shook her head.  “No, of course no!  I’m happy to help.  I’m sure you’ll be a talented chef in no time.”  She loved spending time with him, never mind that she shouldn’t.  Never mind that she’d made a promise to herself that she’d said aloud multiple times…that she would never fall in love again.  Never mind that she’d broken that promise.  She couldn’t bear for him to think that he was putting her out.

He chuckled.  “I doubt that.  But you are an excellent teacher.”  

He was smiling so gently at her…his heavenly smile had always been her weakness, and now that she knew how she felt about him, she didn’t know how to make her heart stop racing!  But before she could say anything else, the door behind her swung open, and Kyoko gasped, spinning around and bumping into Tsuruga-san who caught her immediately, hands on his shoulders steadying her.  His whole body was tense, and he moved to stand in front of her as a familiar face appeared in the doorway, smiling easily at the two of them.

“Oh…Kyoko-san.  I’m sorry.  I didn’t mean to scare you.  I heard voices out here and I wanted to make sure no one was trying to break in.

“Touma-san!”  She pressed a hand to her chest and tried to smile.  “I’m sorry if we disturbed you.  I thought everyone would have gone home by now.”

“I was just cleaning up for the night.”

Kyoko glanced up at Tsuruga-san, about to introduce them, when she realized he was still staring distrustfully at Touma-san, his arm outstretched in front of her.  And that’s when she saw the knife in the cook’s hand.  Touma-san looked down the moment she did, grinning and flushing a little.  

“Sorry.  I heard a noise and grabbed the first thing I saw.”  He put the hand holding the knife out of view, which seemed to do little to appease Tsuruga-san who didn’t move the arm he was using to block her.

“Um…Tsuruga-san, this is our new cook, Ito Touma.  He started right before I went to Guam.”  She didn’t remember much about his first few days at the Darumaya since she’d been so busy packing and getting ready for her trip…they’d talked a little, but he always insisted she call him by his first name.  “Touma-san, this is Tsuruga Ren.  We work together at LME.”

“Ah.  Right.  The man you were meeting tonight.  Are you an actor like Kyoko-chan?” he asked, and Kyoko felt her face go pale, jaw dropping.  But before she could insist that Tsuruga-san was leagues better than she was, and that if anything, she was trying to be an actor like him , not the other way around, Tsuruga-san nodded.

“I am.  Nice to meet you, Touma-kun.”  Tsuruga-san held out a hand, shaking Touma-san’s.  

“You too.”  He turned to her.  “Kyoko-san, are you coming inside?”

“Oh…yes!  Tsuruga-san, I’ll see you soon?”

He nodded, keeping an eye on Touma-san for a moment before turning back to her with one of those soft smiles.  “Of course.  Have a good evening, Mogami-san.” 

Kyoko passed by Touma-san who stood to the side to let her inside, and a thrill of fear went up her spine, which, she told herself, was silly.  There was no reason to be nervous…she wasn’t afraid of the dark.  But when Touma-san turned the lock with a soft click, she felt the hairs on the back of her neck stand up, goosebumps rising on her arms. 

“Touma-san, you really are here so late.  You should go home…get some sleep,” she told him, trying to sound normal in the silent restaurant.  Some part of her hesitated to bend down to unbuckle her sandals, but she dismissed it, and of course nothing happened as she stepped into her house slippers.  Touma-san was already back in the kitchen behind the counter, putting the knife away.  

“I’m off tomorrow.  Tsuruga Ren…have I heard that name before?” he asked.

“He’s the top actor in the whole country!” she cried, incredulous but trying not to sound like a member of his fan club.  “He was the lead in Dark Moon!”

“Oh…I think my mom watched that.  I don’t really watch TV,” he confessed.

She had to smile.  “I didn’t either, before I started working in show business.  But even I’d heard of Tsuruga Ren!”  

He shrugged, giving her that boyish smile she’d noticed the first time she’d met him.  He was friendly and charming, and she’d never felt nervous around him.  She’d just been scared because it was so dark in the restaurant, she scolded herself, feeling silly.  “I’ve probably heard his name.  What were the two of you doing out so late?”  He hesitated.  “Is he your…boyfriend?”

“No!  Of course not!” she cried, suddenly glad for the darkness that hid how hot her cheeks got.  “He’s…he’s my senpai at work!  We were rehearsing,” she settled on saying, not wanting to share Tsuruga-san’s private business.  It was none of anyone’s business that he couldn’t cook, or that he’d taken nearly an hour to learn how to properly chop vegetables.  

“Rehearsing?” he asked, a disbelieving lilt in his voice, and she blushed brighter.

“Yes.  Sometimes we rehearse together.”  That, at least, was somewhat true, but her heart fluttered when she remembered rehearsing with him for Dark Moon…his body on top of her prone one…his face coming closer.  Or acting as Setsuka and Cain Heel…how she’d straddled him, her teeth closing around his skin and marking him.  The taste of his skin.  The way his breath had caught in his chest.  “The, um…the project hasn’t been announced yet, so I’m not allowed to talk more about it,” she babbled, trying to make her face go back to its usual color.

“Where do you rehearse?”

“There are rooms at LME that we can use.”

As she stepped into her bedroom, her new phone clutched in her hand, Kyoko couldn’t figure out why those words had come out so automatically…why she’d lied, even by omission.  She supposed it was none of anyone’s business that she’d been in his apartment several times by now, and it could look bad in the press if people found out that she went to his home alone at night fairly regularly.  Reporters would certainly ask him questions about that, and she doubted he’d ever want her to come over again…which would be for the best, she reminded herself.  She was supposed to be putting distance between them.

But she hadn’t been thinking about any of that when she’d lied to Touma-san.  He’d suspected that they were dating, as preposterous as that was, and she couldn’t have that.  Besides, something in his tone when he’d asked if Tsuruga-san was her boyfriend had worried her…had made her nervous.  She didn’t know why.  She just knew that she was glad she’d lied.  

With the door shut and her light on, Kyoko felt a little silly.  There was no reason to be nervous.  Touma-san had just been making conversation.  He didn’t seem to know anything about celebrities or TV shows, so it made sense that he would have questions.  He’d just been making small talk.  Besides, he’d been nothing but friendly since they’d met.  It had just been the strange timing of seeing him when she’d thought they were alone that had made her nervous.  That and the knife…but he’d had an explanation for that.  

Her phone buzzed then, and she jumped a little before flipping it open to see that she’d gotten a new text message from Tsuruga-san.

I just wanted to thank you again for helping me tonight.  Have a good night, and I’ll see you Friday.

Kyoko held the phone to her chest, closing her eyes as her heart raced in her chest.  This was dangerous.  It would have been better if she’d just kept her distance…let Tsuruga-san fall deeper in love with the high school girl and keep herself busy focusing on her own dreams.  She’d sworn that she would never let herself fall in love again…that never again would she allow that box to be opened.  But here she was, kneeling on her futon, cellphone clutched in her hands, a tear running down her cheek.  

She couldn’t do this.  She couldn’t let him find out, not ever.  It would be worse, she realized, than Sho, because Tsuruga-san was kind to her.  He was her friend.  And if she lost that…she wasn’t sure what she would do.

She swallowed hard, wiping a brusque hand over her face and making herself smile as she typed. 

Of course!  Have a good night!

Then she plugged her phone into the charger by her bed and stared at it for a moment before going to take a shower.  And on her way, she pulled on the door that led to the public space, double checking that it was locked.

It was.

She gave it an extra tug just in case, wiggling the knob, then went to take her shower.  Maybe her landlady had come into her room and had done some cleaning?  But that didn’t make sense.  Or maybe she’d actually put her phone somewhere else?  They’d been really busy and she’d been tired, so she could have forgotten…but she’d practically turned her room upside down looking for it that morning, thus why she’d been late.  Why would anyone break into her room just to take her phone?

Kyoko tried not to think about it anymore…tried not to think about her strangely missing cell phone or her troubling feelings for Tsuruga-san or the strange encounter with Touma-san.  Instead, she got in the shower, got dressed for bed, and studied her script until it was time to go to sleep.

Chapter Text

Ren didn’t see Kyoko again until Friday when he picked her up at TBM, showing his pass and parking in the garage, which was starting to empty out at this hour.  He’d sent Yashiro home, assuring him that he could pick Kyoko up from work, and had gone back and forth on whether he should get groceries or not, but had ultimately decided that he’d rather grocery shop with her.  Not wanting to accidentally stumble upon her secret job and get her in trouble, he decided to forgo trying to visit with the chicken and just leaned against his car, reading through his emails until she appeared, hurrying towards him.  

“I hope you didn’t have to wait long.”

“Not at all,” he assured her, hoping to put her at ease.  She dropped her eyes from his, though, just like she’d been doing more and more lately, bowing as deeply as ever.

“Thank you for picking me up.”

“Of course.  You’re doing me a favor after all.  How’s the secret project?”

She climbed into the car when he held the door for her, face turned what he told himself wasn't deliberately away from him.  “Um…it’s going well.  Thank you.  How was your work?”

“Very productive,” he dared to tease a little, closing her door once she was inside and walking around to the driver’s side.  They’d known each other for a year now and she was talking to him like they were coworkers who passed one another in the hall occasionally instead of two people who’d worked together on several projects now.  Hell, they’d lived together for a while!   “Did you have fun with Kotonami-san?  The two of you went jogging this week, right?”

“Yes!  She said we could go again sometime!  And we’re going to have a sleepover soon!” she gushed, before seeming to purposefully reign herself in.  “And then she came in for breakfast before we went to work.”

“It sounds like you had a good time.”  He did his best to keep his smile from turning too soft…to keep himself from melting at her excitement.  Baby steps.  Maybe by the time he was ready to share his secret with her, she’d actually consider him a friend.  For now, though, he just had to hope that consistent prolonged exposure did some damage to those concrete walls she had erected around herself.

She did seem to relax a little as they walked down the aisles of the grocery store, picking out ingredients and narrating the importance of choosing fresh produce and not just buying whatever was most expensive.  He just sat back and let her talk, holding the basket and dutifully listening to her lecture, trying not to think about the fact that she seemed most comfortable when she was talking to him about his eating habits.  He couldn’t help noticing that she kept a deliberate distance between them, careful to never make contact as she put the ingredients in the basket.  Again, he wondered if he’d done something.  Had he upset her while they’d been Cain and Setsu?  Or had she seen through his act in Guam?  

No…if she’d seen through that, he’d absolutely have heard about it.  Or she wouldn't be speaking to him at all.  She certainly wouldn’t be spending even this much time with him.  

But he would have to tell her one day.  If he ever wanted a real relationship with her, even if it was years in the future, he was going to have to tell her the truth.  And he knew there was a very real possibility that it was going to break her heart.  Maybe in the end, he was no better than Fuwa after all.  That, however, was something he would worry about later, and much as he knew he was going to have to come up with a plan for it.

Ren pulled his wallet out before they reached the register, stepping in front of her and swiping his card before she could reach for her purse.  

“Tsuruga-san…”

“Yes?” he asked, nodding to the cashier who handed him his receipt.

“You paid last time.”

“I did,” he agreed with a smile.

“So,” she went on, voice forcibly reasonable,  “why not let me pay this time?”

“Ah.  I see what you mean.”  He could practically feel her lack of amusement even without looking at her, but when he finally did turn around, the two of them making their way to the elevator, he couldn’t help his chuckle at the irritation on her face. But the second he met her eyes, laughing softly to himself, she jerked hers away as if burned, stiffening a little.  “What are we making today?” he asked, hoping to distract her.

“I thought we would try a curry,” she told the wall beside him, quickly turning to stare at the elevator door instead.  “That way, we’ll practice making rice, cutting vegetables, and we can make chicken too.”

“Sounds like a great plan.”  

It did.  And he may or may not have been practicing in the evenings, buying bundles of carrots and radishes just to chop them into little pieces that were becoming more uniform by the day.  It wasn’t that he didn’t want to practice with her, but it was a little embarrassing to have his vegetable chopping praised like he was a six year old.  Especially considering Kyoko had been learning how to cook when they’d first met years ago.  

“How are things at the Darumaya?” he asked after a moment, trying to start the conversation again.  It was strange, before Guam, it had felt at least a little easier to talk to her normally.  Now, though, it was like she couldn’t even stand to look at him for too long.  But if that were true, surely she wouldn’t be helping him at his apartment.  Again.

“Good.  We’ve been busy lately.”

“Have you had any more trouble with things going missing?” he wondered, slipping off his shoes, then moving out of the way so she could do the same.

“No, I don’t believe so.  I’m still not sure what could have happened.”

He hesitated, carrying the bag to the kitchen and setting it down before turning to her.  “The new cook, Touma, does he have a key?”

“No, I don’t believe so.  Only those of us who live there should have keys.  Why?” 

“Just curious,” he hurried to assure her, not able to explain the way he’d felt, watching Kyoko walk into the dark restaurant in front of the new cook…or the thrill of fear that had shot up his spine when he’d seen the knife in the man’s hand.  It wasn’t like his fears were based on anything…Kyoko was perfectly safe, and the new cook was probably fine.  “Have you worked any more shifts there?”

“I worked there last night.  I try to help out as often as I can.  It was really kind of them to take me in…”  She dropped her eyes to the bags of food, lips pursed.  “And they don’t charge me as much as they should.”

“They seem like good people.”

She nodded.  “They really are.”

They started with the chicken, Kyoko explaining in depth how important it was to make sure the meat was thoroughly cooked to the correct temperature, and he took it all in, nodding along and forcing himself to focus, which was hard when she was so animated, talking to him like she had before Guam…before she’d started avoiding him and before she’d suddenly developed an aversion to looking him in the eye.  

He showed off his new vegetable chopping skills, trying not to blush when she gave him the same praise one might give a toddler who’d successfully stacked a tower of blocks, never condescending but equally as enthusiastic.  Then she walked him through making rice, which he sort of knew how to do, but he made sure to watch her movements.  She was fluid in the kitchen, rarely hesitating, always seeming to know what to do next.  And that was exactly what he needed for his character.  He’d been watching cooking shows too, but there was nothing like being able to see the real thing in person.

Kyoko let him take the lead for most of it, walking him through each step and keeping a crucial eye on every movement.  “Make sure you wash your hands often, especially after you touch meat.  And when you use the knife, make sure you’re always holding your hand…yes.  Exactly.”

“And the sauce?  Like this?”

“Perfect!”  She nodded, eyes bright.  “You don’t even need me,” she laughed.  “You’ve already got it!”

“I doubt that,” he chuckled, shaking his head at her blind faith in him.  

“You’re doing it!  You made the sauce and the chicken and the rice!  You’re almost done!”

He was.  And when he finished, stepping back to look at the plates of food he’d cooked almost completely on his own, he was almost undone by the look on Kyoko’s face…the unabashed pride and excitement as she rested her hands on the countertop and bounced a little.  

“That’s perfect!” she cried.

“You haven’t tasted it yet,” he reminded her, chuckling softly, unable to help his own smile.  

“Well, what are we waiting for?” she asked, taking one of the bowls.  

The food was, surprisingly, probably the best he’d ever made, although he knew that he had Kyoko to thank.  “This was all you, Mogami-san.”

“No it wasn’t.  You did almost everything.”

“You talked me through it.”

She waved him off, laughing and seeming a little embarrassed as she took a bite of rice.  “Have you seen a script yet?  Do you know what you’ll need to cook?”

“Yashiro said I should get one next week.  Tuesday at the latest.”

“Good.  Then we can practice more specific techniques.  I mean…if you want.”

“I’d really appreciate it if you have time.”

“Of course.”

He tried to make more small talk as he drove her home, and she chatted almost easily with him, telling him about her plans to go to her acting class the following day and her sword fighting classes on Monday after jogging with Kotonami-san and filming for Lotus.  It was a good thing she had Yashiro, he thought as he pulled up to the Darumaya.  She was getting busy enough, with new offers for dramas and commercials that she needed help sifting through it all, not to mention the fact that Yashiro could drive her to work and back so she wouldn’t have to ride her bike.

“You um…Tsuruga-san, you really didn’t have to drive me home,” she told him as they approached the Darumaya.  

“It’s late,” he reminded her. 

“Yes, but…I could have taken the bus.”

“Now you don’t have to,” he told her lightly.  “Besides, you’re doing me a favor.”

“But you’ve helped me so many times!  If anything, I owe you.”

He pressed his lips together, turning his head so she wouldn’t see.  She could always tell when he was upset, better than anyone else ever could.  Hell, he didn’t think his own parents could read him like Mogami Kyoko.  But of course…of course she was only doing this because she thought she owed him.  Of course it was nothing personal.  Of course she had to make that abundantly clear.

“...the time you helped me with Dark Moon and then when you…”

“It’s alright, Mogami-san.  You don’t have to list them,” he told her with a sigh when it seemed like she might keep going.

She went abruptly quiet, and when he glanced over, he saw that she was staring at her own hands, jaw tight.  He opened his mouth and closed it, wishing he hadn’t spoken up…wishing he’d just let her go on telling him about all the times he’d helped her.  Why, he thought, couldn’t she just see him as a friend?  As a normal person?  As a man?  Why did he always have to be this larger than life presence she never wanted to get close to?  

“Tsuruga-san, it’s not…um…it’s not that I don’t want to…I mean…I’m happy to help you.  Even if you hadn’t helped me, I would still…I just mean, that’s not why.”

Why then, he thought almost desperately.  Why was she helping him if it wasn’t out of obligation?  He didn’t dare ask.  With his luck, her answer would only make him feel worse.  But when he pulled to a stop at the Darumaya, she turned to him, voice faint.  

“Thank you.  For giving me a ride.  I…I don’t mean to sound ungrateful.”

He bit back another sigh.  “I know.  But I promise, giving you a ride home wasn’t any trouble.  And the times I’ve helped you…none of that was any trouble either.  I’m always happy to help you.  Any time you need it.”

Her eyes widened when they met his, and he hoped she could see that he meant it…hoped the smile he couldn’t hold back when he looked at her was enough to convince her.  But once more, her eyes dropped from his, and he couldn’t help the sting of rejection when she climbed out of his car, suddenly in a hurry.  

“Thank you again.  Have a good night!  And don’t forget to keep practicing with the extra vegetables we bought!”

And then she was gone.

Sighing to himself, he watched her disappear into the restaurant, waiting until the door shut behind her before driving back home.  Was he even making progress?  Sure, there had been times during the evening when she’d been almost normal around him just like she had before Guam, but even then, they hadn’t been friends.  Not really.  Not like he wanted.  How much longer, he wondered, could he live with incremental, insignificant progress?  How much longer before he just confessed and told her how he really felt, even if that would be a disaster?  Even if she might never want to speak to him again or worse, feel like she had to speak to him because he was her senior at work?

But there was nothing to be done about it.  Not at the moment, anyway.  Instead, he drove home.  He cleaned his kitchen.  He thought over his plan to befriend the girl he was in love with.  Maybe, he thought, he wasn’t being blatant enough about the fact that he wanted to be her friend.  Maybe he needed to come out and say it so she wouldn’t misunderstand.  Because if there was anything Mogami Kyoko knew how to do, it was misunderstand him.  So, he thought, maybe it would take something more.  Maybe what he needed to do was come up with some kind of big gesture.  Not too big…a medium gesture.  A medium gesture where he did something normal and friendly and told her that he saw her as a friend.  

And if she ran away?  

By why would she, he thought as he lay in bed that night.  Why would she be so afraid of just being his friend?  It wasn’t like he was asking her to love him.  She’d vowed, after all, never to fall in love again.  And he wasn’t asking her to break that vow.  Not at the moment, anyway.  She could still have friends, though.  After all, Kotonami-san was her friend and she loved her.  Couldn’t he have the same?  Even if they’d had a rough start, surely they’d moved past it.

Right?

He threw himself into work the next day, reading through scripts and offers and then heading to set where he spent a full eight hours not letting himself think about Kyoko or grand gestures or anything else except work.  Wasn’t that why he’d become Tsuruga Ren, after all?  To think about nothing but work?  To be the best actor, even better than his father?  And he’d had no trouble with that for the last four years.  That was how he’d become one of the top actors in the country.  So why, he wondered between takes, was Kyoko the only thing on his mind as he was trying to study lines or talk to his coworkers or go over his schedule with Yashiro?

“Are you okay, Ren?” Yashiro asked, brows raised as the two grabbed bentos for lunch.

“Fine,” he assured him, doing his best to give a reassuring smile lest his manager figure out that he was thinking about Kyoko and tease him.

“You aren’t getting sick again, are you?”

“No.  I’m perfectly healthy.”

Yashiro didn’t look convinced, but he also didn’t ask any more questions, just went back to work, and Ren did the same, trying not to think about how easy it had been just a year ago to exist this way, thinking only about work.  Before Kyoko, it had been the easiest thing in the world to make work his whole life.  Now, though…now she snuck into his thoughts, her sweet smile and the sound of her laughter coming to him as he was trying to run through his lines.  Now as he mechanically ate his lunch, he wondered if Kyoko would like it, or if she would insist he needed to eat more.  Now he watched his costars act and wondered what she would think of them…what her interpretation of their characters would be.  

He couldn’t help planning a little as he worked, but only during breaks between takes.  A dinner.  It could be a thank you dinner to show her that her hard work had paid off.  He would cook for her for once.  He would thank her for all of her help.  He would tell her that she was such a good friend, and such an important person to him.  And then, surely, she would see.  And if she was still upset with him, he could just ask.  He would have to.

First, he would need to decide what to make her.  She would be happy with anything, he knew, and as much as he wanted to impress her, he also didn’t want to risk trying to make something for the first time and messing it all up.

“Are you worried about Kyoko?”

Although the question, asked hours later, didn’t surprise him, his manager’s tone did.  He cocked his head, meeting his eyes in the rear view mirror.  “What do you mean?” he asked, a little hesitant.  Had Yashiro noticed her avoiding him too?

“The issue with her phone.  It’s not like her to lose something like that.”

“No,” he agreed.  “It’s not.”

“And mistakes happen, but for her to think she left it in her room…”

“She said that her landlords were the only other people who would have a key.”

 “Right…but if someone else were to get one or the door was left unlocked…”

He didn’t want to think about that…didn’t want to admit to the shiver that went down his back at the very thought of someone being able to get into her room.  Someone who wouldn’t steal her money or her key to LME or even Princess Rosa…someone who wanted her phone specifically.  

“Why take her phone?” he couldn’t help asking, staring out at the city as it passed.  “It’s not like it was worth very much.”

“Do you think there could have been important information on it?”

“Maybe her contacts?” he suggested.  “But I haven’t gotten any calls from that phone.  I don’t think the president has either.”  He doubted she had many photos on her phone, or personal information, and as far as he knew, she didn’t have social media, even if that phone was capable of accessing it.  

“Yeah…you're probably the highest profile person she knows, so if they were after her phone for your number, they probably would have used it by now.”  Yashiro sighed.  “I’m sure it’s nothing.  But…if someone can get into her room…it might not be safe for her to live there much longer.”

Ren nodded, still staring out the window.  He was right, although he wasn’t sure if Kyoko could afford an apartment on her own yet, especially one that was safe and close enough to work.  She was getting more jobs, but were they enough to pay for her acting classes and an apartment?  “Does the President know?”

“I’m not sure…her department head may have spoken to him.”

He resolved not to bring it up with Lory unless Kyoko did.  He didn’t want her to think he was trying to go over her head or undermine her or worse, get her in trouble…but he did think that their president could probably find her a place to live if it came to it.  Or hell, he’d help her.  Surely there was a place that would offer him a discount if Yashiro asked, and Kyoko wouldn’t need to know.  Then again, if she found out…maybe he shouldn’t be adding to the secrets he was keeping from her if he wanted her to be his friend.

They reached the next studio then, and it was back to the countless interviews and script meetings and everything else that had filled his life, taking top priority, until he’d met Kyoko again.  

He spent Sunday the way he usually did, studying scripts, reading, watching entertainment news…making sure to keep up with his work and what the public was saying about him.  He sorted through job offers and cleaned his apartment, preferring his privacy to having someone come and clean for him.  He couldn’t help the way his thoughts strayed to a future where someone might help him decorate this place…make it a home.  Would Kyoko ever want that, he wondered as he opened his phone browser and began to search through easy recipes similar to what they’d already made together.  

He was getting way ahead of himself, he knew.  That wasn’t the plan.  The plan, from the moment he’d stepped off of that plane and had become Tsuruga Ren, was to become a better actor than his father, go home to California, and continue his career as one of the all time greats.  Then, he knew, people would take him seriously.  Directors would see him as his own person.  And Cedric…

He shook his head at himself and sighed as he scrolled through the recipe website.  He hadn’t thought about Cedric in months.  Only when he dreamed about that fateful night did thoughts of his cousin come up. 

But was that still his plan?  He still wanted to be great…greater than his father.  He wanted to be recognized for his own talent.  But he also wanted Kyoko.  He wanted to tell her that he loved her…that she had somehow become his favorite person in the world.  He wanted to tell her how much he admired her and how much she had helped him.  He wanted her to return those feelings.  He wanted a life with her.  How could he have that if he moved back to America?

One step at a time.  First, he had to figure out what to make her for dinner.

They didn’t pick her up on Monday morning since she had a late call time, but he knew she’d be jogging with Kotonami-san, so that would be a safe topic for them to discuss when they carpooled the next day.  He could talk about their next cooking lesson too…schedule a time for her to come over so that he could surprise her.  He would need to grocery shop…make a list and get everything ready.  Would candles be too much, he wondered as Yashiro pulled into the parking garage of LME.  Maybe flowers?  Or just one flower?  She’d accepted the rose he’d given her on her birthday, after all.

They headed straight for Yashiro’s office, the two of them sitting down to go through paperwork and offers and fan mail and the seemingly endless minutiae that came with this career.  Ren didn't mind too much…could always use the break from the constant performance that he had to put on any time he was in public.  

Yashiro’s phone rang just as they were packing up their things to head to set about an hour later.  There was a script meeting before the filming was set to begin, and the plan was to arrive a little early so Yashiro could drop him off, then pick up Kyoko.  Ren had assured him that he never minded waiting if Kyoko needed a ride, something his manager had surprisingly not teased him about.

He went ahead, giving him some privacy to take the phone call, and pulled out his own phone.  But when he reached the end of the corridor, he turned back and froze, heart in his throat.  Yashiro was pale, mouth open, a look of horror on his face.

“Yashiro?”

He seemed to snap out of it then, steely determination taking the place of panic.  “Okay…thank you so much for letting me know.  I’ll…” His eyes shot to Ren.  “Don’t worry.  I’ll take care of her.”

His stomach dropped.  Her?  Who was ‘her?’  But he didn’t even need to ask.  Somehow, deep down, he already knew.  “What’s wrong?” he demanded the second Yashiro pocketed his phone, hurrying to follow as his manager began speed walking down the hall that would take them to the elevator.  All around them, people passed in a blur, one seeming to blend into the next.  “Yashiro?”  

“Kyoko-chan is at the hospital.  Kotonami-san was attacked at the Darumaya this morning.”

For a moment, Ren thought he must have blacked out, blood suddenly roaring in his ears, but his legs never stopped propelling him forward.  Kyoko was at the hospital?  Or in the hospital?   “What?” he demanded, too loud, and a janitor turned to watch them, wide eyed.  He couldn’t bring himself to care.   

“I can drop you off at the set…”

“What?” he repeated, voice angry this time, even if he didn’t mean for it to be.  “Yashiro…is she hurt too?”

He shook his head.  “I don’t know.”

“What happened?”

“I don’t know,” he repeated sharply, his shoulders set, gaze stubbornly straight ahead.

“Who attacked them?”

“I don’t know, Ren.”

“Who was that?  Who called you?  Was it her?”

“Her landlady.  Kyoko-chan gave her my number in case of emergencies.  I can drop you off on set and then I need to…”

“No.”  

Yashiro, to his credit, barely missed a step, just glanced at Ren who was now matching him step for step, feeling cold and far away.  “You’ll miss work.”

“I don’t care.”  He didn’t.  For the first time in his adult life, he didn’t give a single shit about work.   Not when Kyoko was at the hospital.  Not when her best friend had just been attacked.  

“In that case, will you drive?  I have to make some phone calls?”  Yashiro pulled a glove out of his pocket.

“Of course.  Is anyone with her,” he asked, taking the keys and slamming his finger into the button to call the elevator.

“Her landlady called an ambulance, and they took Kyoko-chan and Kotonami-san.  She stayed at the restaurant with her husband to speak to the police.”

They were supposed to go jogging.  Ren started the car and pulled out of the garage, glancing at his manager in the rear view mirror as he dialed and held the phone to his ear.  Had they been jogging?  Had someone followed them back to the restaurant? Were they both attacked?  Was this related to her phone being taken?  Had her phone been taken?

Yashiro sighed, dropping the phone from his ear and dialing again.  “Kyoko-chan isn’t answering her phone.  I’m going to call Takarada-san, then I can call the director.”

Ren nodded, numb as he navigated the Tokyo traffic.  The car was so quiet that he could hear the line ringing, then the President picked up and Yashiro told him everything he knew, which was everything Ren knew.

“Sir?  Kyoko-chan’s landlady just called me.   Kotonami-san was attacked outside of the restaurant where Kyoko-chan lives.  They’re both at the hospital now.  Ren and I are on our way as well.”

A pause, and Ren could make out the President’s voice but not his words.

“Yes.  I do.  Thank you.”

He stopped listening when his manager called the director.  All he cared about was getting to the hospital.

Chapter Text

Kyoko stared at the wall, eyes trained on a poster emphasizing the safety of wearing a bike helmet without actually seeing it.  She wasn’t sure how long she’d been staring at the wall…wasn’t sure what time it was, or what time it had been when she’d arrived, or even if she was supposed to be somewhere else right now.  She couldn’t think much of anything…just saw her best friend again and again…just saw the blood in the alley and felt her limp hand in her own and heard the voices of the paramedics as they’d shouted back and forth.  Just heard the wail of the ambulance siren still echoing in her head even though she was in the waiting room now.  Waiting. Still dressed in her running clothes and tennis shoes.  Maybe bleeding…her knees hurt from where they’d hit the asphalt but she couldn’t look away from the wall for long enough to check.

All around her, she was vaguely aware of people hurrying past, talking to one another or calling for help.  Moko-san’s bag was at her feet, her cellphone inside, but Kyoko had left her own purse and phone at the Darumaya…hadn’t thought to grab them in all the chaos.  She would need to walk home, then…but that was okay.  First, though, she had to make sure her best friend was okay.

It was all she could see…Moko-san.  The blood.  Her discarded bag.  Whoever it was, they hadn’t taken her bag…

Why wouldn’t they take her bag?  If it was an attempted robbery like the paramedics had suspected…

“Mogami-san?”

When she forced her eyes to focus again, she realized she was staring at a familiar face, dark eyes intent on hers.  Tsuruga-san.  And behind him, Yashiro-san.  Why were they here?  Had they heard about Moko-san?  Had someone called them?  Had she called them?  No…her phone was at the Darumaya still, and she hadn’t taken anything from Moko-san’s bag…hadn’t moved for a long time.

His hand landed on her knee.  “You’re bleeding. Are you hurt anywhere else?” he asked, voice so soft and worried that it broke something in her, her whole body shuddering as a sob finally escaped, face crumbling, her forehead dropping to land on his shoulder.

Just for a second.  She just needed a second.

Her best friend…her first real friend.  She was hurt.  What if…

He put his arms around her without hesitation, one hand on her hair as she sobbed into his shoulder.  For a moment, he rested his cheek against her head, rubbing her back so soothingly.  And if it weren’t for the image of her best friend on the ground in that alley, blood haloed around her head, she might have been more preoccupied with the way he smelled and the feeling of safety she always found in his arms.  Instead, all she could feel was a pain that verged on unbearable, cries she couldn’t stop escaping without her even noticing.  

After a moment, Yashiro-san disappeared, returning some time later…she wasn’t sure how much time had passed…how long Tsuruga-san had been holding her.  He must have returned eventually because he spoke again.  “The doctor said she’s still unconscious…”

She didn’t hear anything else, just closed her eyes and sobbed in Tsuruga-san’s arms until the tears just wouldn’t fall anymore…until all she could feel was numb.  He pulled back then, using a cloth to wipe her face, and some part of her realized it must be a handkerchief.  Surely, she thought, she ought to feel something about that, only she couldn’t manage anything…could only stare straight ahead while he crouched in front of her, a hand on her cheek.

When had he even gotten here?  How had they known how to find her?  Should she be working right now?  

“I can’t,” she breathed, another tear falling.

Tsuruga-san leaned in.  “What was that?” 

“I can’t.  I can’t go to work.  I’m sorry…I’m sorry…”

“Of course you can’t,” he murmured.  “No one expects you to go to work right now.  Takarada-san already took care of everything.”

“Kyoko-chan, can you tell us what happened?” their manager put in, voice so gentle it hurt.  Tsuruga-san placed the handkerchief against one of her knees where she assumed she was still bleeding, and it stung in a vague way.

“We were supposed to go jogging again.”  Kyoko breathed the words, unable, for some reason, to make her voice any louder.  “She was late.  Moko-san’s never late.  She was going to meet me at the Darumaya.  Then…I went out the back door…where the alley is.  And she was there…”

Blood a halo around her friend's head.  A rock discarded by the trash cans.  Her own inability to move for seconds or minutes…her feet frozen in place.  She hadn’t been able to breathe.  

And then, somehow, she’d called an ambulance.  She’d screamed.  Her landlady had come.  Her husband had come.  Kyoko couldn’t remember the order of any of it.  

“Drink this,” Tsuruga-san urged softly, pressing a cold can into her hand.  She didn’t know where he’d found a can of peach tea or if he’d left her side at some point, but it was already open.  Kyoko stared at it for a moment, then nodded, bringing it to her lips and taking a drink without tasting it.  “Did you talk to a doctor?  Or the police?”

She’d seen her best friend on the ground, so horribly still.  She’d called an ambulance.  And then she’d been sitting here.

“I don’t know.”

Something settled over her shoulders.  A coat?  She shuddered, warmth encompassing her along with a heavy arm.  “Keep drinking that,” Tsuruga-san urged softly, still rubbing her arm, his body warm next to hers.  She was cold.  She couldn’t think.  She felt sick.  Was she sick?  “Takarada-san called us.  He contacted her family.”

Moko-san’s family…her loud nieces and nephews and her sister and brothers, all of them so chaotic and happy and fun.  “Her parents…they’re…they’re not here.”  They were on vacation.  They weren’t good with money.  Moko-san was always embarrassed about that.  Where were they this time?  A cruise?  

“What?” 

Her parents were somewhere else and Moko-san acted so put out by her nieces and nephews but they loved her so much and she loved them and she always brought them…

“She gives them chocolate.  The kids.”

He hesitated before rubbing her arm.  “Okay.  The doctors are with her now.  They’ll look after her.  Why don’t you come with us…”

She shook her head, almost frantic.  “No.  I’m not leaving.  I…I can’t.”  

He didn’t argue, just kept his arm around her, letting her lean against him and prompting her to drink her tea until it was gone.  Then there were police officers and one of them was talking to her, and she was pretty sure she was answering questions only she could barely hear herself talk over the roaring in her own ears.  Moko-san’s sister arrived, three children in tow, all of them unusually subdued.  At some point, Yashiro-san was talking, maybe to Tsuruga-san, but the next thing she knew, a doctor was there, saying something about head injuries and observation only Kyoko couldn’t make any of it out. 

“Can you tell us who might have been at the restaurant?”

Kyoko blinked and a police officer was in front of her.  Frowning, she looked around, realizing the police officers hadn’t left.  Tsuruga-san’s arm was still around her, his jacket warm around her shoulders, her head limp on his shoulder.  If she’d had the energy, she might have pulled away.  Instead, she just nodded.  “Yes.  Um…my landlady was upstairs getting ready for the day.  My landlord was in the kitchen preparing food.  The delivery driver, Yoshida Kenji…he comes every morning around that time.  Only…I didn’t see him.  He might have been there…”

“Was the new cook there?” Tsuruga-san prompted.  

She shook her head.  “No…Touma-san doesn’t work today.”  He’d told her that he had plans.  He was…she couldn’t remember.  Maybe going to the library.  She thought he liked to read.  

The police left at some point, and the doctor talked to Moko-san’s sister and Kyoko closed her eyes.  They’d just gone jogging the week before, the two of them running side by side in the park while her friend had given her a skeptical look.

“So you’re teaching him to…cook?”  Moko-san had asked when Kyoko had explained what she and Tsuruga-san had been doing.

Kyoko had nodded, trying to look nonchalant about it.  “Yes.  He has a role where he’ll need to cook, so he asked if I could show him a few things.”

Her friend had lifted an eyebrow, panting a little.  “He couldn’t hire someone for that?  Isn’t he rich?”

“I don’t mind helping,” she’d assured her.  “Besides, there’s no reason to waste money.”

Moko-san had hummed something under her breath, still looking skeptical.

Was it strange, she had wondered, for her to go to his apartment and help him?  She’d done so when she’d been his manager.  And when they’d been filming Dark Moon.  She’d gone there when she’d needed help with Natsu.  And they’d practically lived together as Cain and Setsu.  And all of that had been for work, so it was okay, right?  It wasn’t like she just showed up at his apartment to spend time together.  He was her mentor...and she would do the same for Moko-san if she ever asked.  

So it was okay, she’d decided.  It had to be.  It wasn’t because she felt any certain way about him.  

Her friend had followed her to the Darumaya, Kyoko leading her to the kitchen to grab them both glasses of water and waving to Touma-san who had already been hard at work getting the kitchen ready for the morning rush, when the back door had opened and the delivery driver from the day before had stepped inside.  He’d called out a greeting, cheery as ever, then had spotted her.  “Good morning, Kyoko-chan!”

She had bowed a little.  “Oh.  Good morning.  You’re here early.”  The delivery came twice a day, once in the morning, and once in the evening, but she usually only ran into them if she was working in the evening.  

“Yeah, my boss moved some things around in the schedule, so we’ll be arriving earlier.  Will you be here?”

“Sometimes,” she had settled on saying, the condensation from the water glasses making them slippery.  “I have to go get ready for work though.”

“Did you go running this morning?”

“Yes, my friend and I go running sometimes.”

“Where do you run?”

“Different places…” she’d dithered a little, not wanting to say for some reason.

Moko-san had appeared then, taking one of the glasses and standing shoulder to shoulder with Kyoko.   

“Oh, um…Moko-san, this is one of our delivery drivers.”

“Yoshida Kenji,” he’d introduced.  

“Yoshida-san, this is Kotonami Kanae.”

“Nice to meet you,” Moko-san had greeted, nodding her head in the smallest bow that could possibly be considered polite, her eyes remote and almost cold.  “Kyoko, we should hurry.”

Confused but trying to hide it, she had nodded.  “Of course.  It was nice to see you again, Yoshida-san.”  She waited until they were in the other room to ask, “Are we running late?”

“No.  I just thought you might want an excuse to get away from him since he obviously likes you.”

“Likes me?”  She had shaken her head, laughing a little.  “What do you mean?”

Her friend had just rolled her eyes.  “Nothing.  I’m going home to shower.”

“Alright.  Thanks for inviting me!  We should go again soon!”

“Sure.  Maybe next week,” Moko-san had told her with a reluctant little smile.  “But this doesn’t mean  you make cake every time we have a sleepover.”

“You want to have more sleepovers?” she’d asked, bouncing a little in delight.

Moko-san had just huffed.  “Goodbye, Kyoko.”

It had been about an hour later when she had been heading out the door when Touma-san had stopped her.  “Your friend, is she an actress too?”

“Oh, yes!  She’s an incredible actress!”

“I’m sure she’s not better than you,” he’d laughed a little, scoffing like just the idea was ridiculous.  As far as she knew, he’d never seen her act…but he’d seemed so confident.

She had blushed a little.  “Um…thank you.  But…”  Yashiro-san’s car had pulled up then, and she’d felt a wave of relief she hadn’t quite understood.  “Oh.  That’s my ride.  I’d better go.  Have a good day!”

“You too, Kyoko-san.”

Would the delivery driver have done something to her friend?  But why?  He seemed so nice, and Moko-san had been polite…there would be no reason to hurt her. 

“Excuse me…”. 

She looked up, realizing that there was a police officer standing in front of her again.  

“You mentioned Yoshida Kenji?  The delivery driver?”

She nodded.  “Yes.  He comes almost every day.”

“Do you know anything about him?”

“Um…only that his schedule was recently changed and that he’s worked for that company for a few weeks.”

The police officer nodded solemnly.  “Have you ever met with him outside of work?”

“No.  I rarely see him at work.”

“I see…we found his truck a few streets away, but at the moment, we’ve been unable to locate Yoshida-san.”

“Do you think he could have done this?” Tsuruga-san asked, and somehow, he was still holding her.

“We’re not sure at this time, but we’ll stay in touch if we learn anything.”

And then they were gone and Kyoko was still leaning on Tsuruga-san it was too quiet and she didn’t know what to do.  And then it hit her.  Tsuruga-san was still here !

“What time is it?” she demanded, sitting upright for the first time and turning to him with blatant horror.

He glanced at the wall behind her, not looking at all put out that she’d just cried all over him.  “Almost noon.  Have you eaten?”

She shook her head, not comprehending the question.  “What?  No…you’re late!  You were supposed to be on set by 9:30!  You have to go!”

He rested a hand on her shoulder.  “It’s okay.  Yashiro already called and informed the director that I wouldn’t be in today.”

She just stared at him, sure he must have switched to a different language because she didn’t understand.  What did he mean, he wouldn’t be in ?  What did that mean?  “Tsuruga-san…do you speak Korean?” 

He blinked, brow furrowed.  “What?”

“I don’t understand what you said…I don’t speak it very well…”

“I…” baffled, he shook his head.  “Are you feeling okay?”  In a move that shocked her into stillness, he pressed the back of his hand to her forehead.  “Did you hit your head?”

“No…”

Still looking concerned, he glanced at Yashiro-san.  “Yashiro called the director and told him I wouldn’t be in today.  And Takarada-san already took care of your schedule, and Kotonami-san’s as well.” 

“But…you can’t miss work.”

“It’s fine, Mogami-san,” he told her, looking tired.  “We were ahead on filming anyway.”

She wanted to insist.  She wanted to ask why he was even here.  But she also didn’t want him to leave her here alone.  Instead, she nodded, leaning forward in her chair and dropping her head into her hands, too tired to even hold it up anymore.  He rested a hand on her back and she felt him shift beside her…heard him say something to Yashiro-san she couldn’t make out and didn’t even try to.  But then Yashiro-san was sitting on her other side. 

“Kyoko-chan, why don’t you eat this?” he offered softly, and when she looked up, he was holding an onigiri.  

Numbly, she took it, murmuring her thanks and eating without tasting anything.  He handed one to Tsuruga-san too, and the three of them ate in silence.  She was just about to get up and throw her wrapper away when a nurse approached.  “Family of Kotonami Kanae?”

Moko-san’s sister, who had been whispering into her phone ever since she’d arrived, jumped to her feet, and Kyoko followed suit, the coat sliding back down to the chair.

“Yes!”  her sister asked.

“Kotonami-san is awake and asking for a Kyoko?”

Kyoko stepped forward, looking uncertainly at Moko-san’s sister.  

“Go,” she urged softly.  

She glanced back at Tsuruga-san and Yashiro-san then, but Tsuruga-san just nodded.  “We’ll wait here.  Go ahead.”

So, unable to bear the thought of keeping her friend waiting, she hurried to follow the nurse down the hall and to Moko-san’s room.  Behind her, she heard one of her friend’s nephews ask, ‘sir? Do you act in movies like Kyoko-chan and Auntie Kanae?”  She glanced over her shoulder just in time to see Tsuruga-san smile, and then the double doors were closing behind her, and they were passing doors that led to patient rooms and computers where nurses and doctors gathered around.  Then the nurse stopped at a door and knocked twice before stepping into the room.  

“Kotonami-san?  I brought your friend.”

Kyoko was crying before she reached Moko-san’s bed, dropping into the chair beside her and gripping her hand, doing her best not to stare at the bandage wrapped around her head.  She had never seen her friend look like this….so weak and tired and…sick!  

“Mo, Kyoko.  I’m fine,” she murmured, voice uncharacteristically gentle.  

“You weren’t,” Kyoko whispered, words catching in her throat.  “You were late and…and I went outside and…”  

She squeezed her hand.  

“What happened?”

Her friend sighed, her face pale against the stark white pillow she was resting on.  “I can’t remember…I thought I saw the delivery driver from the other day but…”  She shook her head, frustrated.  “Someone must have come up behind me and hit me.  I don’t think it was him.”

Kyoko closed her eyes.  “I’m sorry.”

“This isn’t your fault,” she admonished.

“You were meeting me…”

“Yeah, so?  It could have happened to anyone.”

“No one’s ever been attacked there…I mean, not since I’ve lived there.  It’s always been such a safe neighborhood.  Do you have any idea who would have wanted to hurt you?”

“No idea.”  She shook her head, wincing when that apparently hurt.  

“Do you need anything?  Your sister is here but I can get a taxi or…”  she trailed off, remembering abruptly that she didn’t have her purse or any money or even her phone, but that did remind her that she had her friends' things, and she placed the little bag Moko-san wore while running onto the table.  “Your phone is inside.”

“Thanks.   Are you okay?  Did they hurt you too?”

“No…I never saw anyone.”  She thought of the blood on her knees, scraped from when she’d dropped to the ground beside her, and how Tsuruga-san had wiped it away, then shoved that thought down.  She didn’t need to be thinking about Tsuruga-san right now.  Tsuruga-san, who was missing work because…because of her?  Because he’d wanted to be there for her?

This was dangerous.  How was she ever supposed to get over her feelings for him when he did things like miss work for her and put an arm around her, holding her close and comforting her?  

“Yashiro-san called Takarada-san, and he said that he took care of our schedules today.”

“I should call Sawara-san…”

Kyoko pulled her phone out, handing it over.  “I can send your sister in?”

“Thanks.  You don’t have to wait.  They’re making me stay for a few more hours but then my sister can take me home.”  Moko-san squeezed her hands, face going soft for a moment.  “Thank you.  For coming with me.  I’m okay now.”

“Call me if you need anything?”

She nodded.  “I will.”

She let Kyoko give her a careful hug, her own arms wrapped tightly around her.  And then Kyoko left her to rest.

Kyoko found Yashiro-san and Tsuruga-san just where she’d left them in the waiting room, both patiently listening to the same little boy tell them all about his favorite TV shows while Moko-san’s sister spoke in that same harsh whisper into her phone.  After Kyoko told her where to find her sister, the woman collected her children and hurried in the direction of her room and Kyoko took her seat once more.

“She’s okay,” she told them, offering a watery smile.  “She, um…she’ll have to stay for a few hours but…she’s going to be okay.”

“Good.  I’m glad,” Tsuruga-san murmured, a hand resting on her shoulder.  

“Why don’t we take you home?” Yashiro-san asked.

“No…I should go to work…”

He was shaking his head before she could finish that sentence.  “You’re already off for the day.  You should rest.”

Kyoko dropped her eyes and stared at her lap, the confession coming out in a whisper.  “I don’t want to sit at home alone all day.”

The hand on her shoulder squeezed.  “Why don’t we go to my place?  Maybe we can cook something.  We’ll count it as another cooking lesson.”

That sounded infinitely better than sitting in her bedroom and obsessing over what could have been.  So, knowing it was a bad idea and knowing that she was never going to be able to overcome these feelings if she kept letting herself get close to him like this, Kyoko nodded, and his answering smile nearly undid her.

Chapter Text

Having Kyoko in his apartment was beginning to feel more and more normal, the minimally decorated box he’d lived in for so long now starting to feel like a home when she was around.  When he’d first come to Japan, he’d lived in a smaller place that had come furnished with, thankfully, mostly western style furniture.  His bed had been just long enough for him, although it hadn’t been much wider than a twin, and his window had looked out onto other apartments and a parking lot.  He hadn’t cared though.  His only focus had been studying scripts and the language he knew but not well enough for the nuance he would need to put into his acting.  

When he’d started making good money and had started getting famous about three years ago, though, he’d decided to move somewhere bigger…somewhere he could actually walk around and didn’t have to duck through every doorway.  A place with a bed where he could roll over in his sleep and not worry about falling off.  So he’d rented this place furnished, and he’d gone through a service to fill the kitchen with anything someone who cooked semi-regularly might need.  It was a plane to study and read and relax away from the hustle and bustle of the outside world.  Before Kyoko, he couldn’t remember ever having a single guest, other than Yashiro on occasion, and once or twice, Takarada.  

Kyoko, though…Kyoko came over almost regularly at this point.  He didn’t know if she’d noticed that she was the only person that ever came here, but he was afraid to point it out lest she take it as a rebuke.  At first, having her here when he’d been sick had been strange, almost like an invasion of his privacy.  Now, though, he looked at the generic kitchen towels and wondered if she might have a preference.  Maybe a favorite color.  Something she thought would look better.  He looked at his sofa, still in near pristine condition, and wondered if she liked it, or if she’d prefer something smaller, or a different style.  

She didn’t seem to be taking in any of his apartment at the moment, though.  Instead, she stood in the corner of the kitchen, back perfectly straight, hands clasped in front of her, eyes far away.  He hadn’t actually meant for her to give him a cooking lesson.  He just hadn't wanted her to be alone.  If she wanted to stay busy, he could pretend to keep her busy.  When he’d asked if she wanted to stop by the Darumaya to change, she’d just shaken her head, and so Yashiro had driven them to Ren’s apartment, dropping them off in the parking garage.  

“I don’t have much food in the apartment.  How about we go grocery shopping first?”

Kyoko had nodded, following him quietly around the grocery store, and he’d taken the lead for once, picking out what he thought was best based on what she’d taught him.  The most expensive thing wasn’t always the best.  Check produce for discoloration.  Sometimes the generic brand was just as good as name brand.  She never interjected, just walked beside him, lost in thought, not even offering to pay, which had worried him the most.  Then, when they’d gone up to his apartment, she’d excused herself to the bathroom, not coming out for a full ten minutes, which he only knew because he’d timed her.  While she’d been in there, though, he’d hurried around his kitchen, grabbing everything they would need to make lunch, washing the produce and laying everything out so she wouldn’t feel the need to do anything.  Only when she’d rejoined him, her smile strained, her eyes far away, had he started preparing the food.

Kyoko never stepped in.  She didn’t even seem aware that he was cooking.  So, deciding that this would be a good pop quiz to cover everything he’d learned so far as well as a way to cook for her, Ren started chopping vegetables and preparing the rice in the rice cooker.  He found himself moving with relative ease around the kitchen, thanks, of course, to Kyoko’s lessons.  He knew how to do the basics, and although he doubted he’d ever be able to cook like she did, for someone who had little interest in food, he thought he might be on his way to becoming a decent cook.

He could cook for her now…he let his mind drift a little, thinking about how nice it would be to be able to regularly make food for her.  Or he could invite her over and they could cook together.  Once they were friends, and surely she wouldn’t object to just that, they could do things like that.  Not because she felt obligated to him or because she owed him.  Because it would be a nice thing to do together.  He was still planning the menu for the next step in his plan, and had decided on her favorite.  Hamburger steak with fried egg.  He had a meat thermometer, so he wouldn’t accidentally poison her, and he had been watching Youtube videos on how to fry the perfect egg. 

And maybe one day, he could make her bentos to take to lunch.  Maybe one day she would accept them. 

Kyoko seemed to come back to life as he was placing the vegetables in the pan, blinking a few times before stepping in closer, shaking her head.  “Oh, Tsuruga-san, you have to…oh…”  She stared at the vegetables, sliced and cubed and ready to cook.  “Oh…you already…”  Seeming baffled, she looked around the kitchen.  “You already did it?  And…are you making…oh, you’re done…”  She looked so heartbreakingly lost when she looked up at him that he rested a hand on her shoulder, daring to initiate physical contact which, in his experience, could be anywhere from fine to a disaster.  

“Are you feeling okay, Mogami-san?”

“Yes…I’m…”  She swallowed hard and nodded.  “I’m okay.  And Moko-san will be okay too.  The doctor said…they said she can even go home today.”

“That’s right.”

She went on, her eyes on his floor.  “But if she hadn’t come to meet me at the Darumaya….”

“This wasn’t your fault,” he reminded her, glancing at the vegetables to make sure he wasn’t burning them.  They still looked okay.  “It seems like it was a random attack.  Have you ever felt unsafe there?”

She hesitated for just a moment, then shook her head.  “No…not really.  I mean…Touma-san startled me but he’s nice.”  

“You said he started working at the restaurant before you left for Guam?”

“Yes, but we haven’t had the opportunity to talk much.  But when we work together he’s always friendly.  And he’s a good cook.”

The spike of jealousy he felt at those words was entirely unwarranted.  Of course someone working as a chef in a restaurant was a good cook.  “I’ll bet he’s not as good as you.”

She laughed, shaking her head, cheeks faintly pink.  “I’m sure he’s much better than me.  I don’t do much cooking at the Darumaya.  I mostly wait tables and help take orders.”

“And all of the customers are okay?  None of them bother you?”  She’d never mentioned any particular customer before, but it was possible that one of her regulars was behind this.  Could one of them have started stalking her?  Snuck into her room and took her phone?

Solemn, she nodded.  “There are some that are too friendly or familiar, especially when they’re drinking, but I’ve been dealing with that my entire life.  I’ve never felt unsafe around any of them, and if they get too rowdy, Taisho always has me stay in the back and he’ll take their food out.”

“Does that happen often?” he asked, brow furrowing in concern.

She smiled a little, shaking her head like he was being silly.  “No.  My job is perfectly safe.”

He wasn’t being silly, though. She’d been stalked before.  That bastard Reino had scared the hell out of her, and Fuwa was always making a nuisance of himself.  Still, he didn’t argue with her.  Not when her eyes were still red from crying and she looked so fragile.  Mogami Kyoko wasn’t fragile, he knew that.  She was tenacious and constantly impressed him with her resilience.  But right now, she just looked so small…so afraid.  He didn’t ever want her to have to look like that.

“You’re doing really well,” she told him softly, pulling him out of his thoughts as he glowed a little at the praise before she went on.  “You might want to stir the vegetables, though.”

He spun around, cursing under his breath, surprised by her soft laugh. 

“Can I help with anything?” she offered, sounding a little more like herself.

He didn’t need help with anything.  In fact, he wanted to tell her that she was welcome to take a seat.  Relax.  Get some rest.  But that wasn’t why she’d come over.  She needed a distraction…to keep busy.  So he gestured to the cabinets.  “Can you get the plates down?”  

She nodded, grabbing plates, then the chopsticks and glasses too, filling them with water as he stirred the vegetables in sauce.  When the rice was done, he spooned some on each of their plates then the stir fry, trying to make it look nice, then giving her the better looking plate.  She took it with wide eyes.  “This looks amazing!  You did so well!  You’re going to be great in your role!”

He chuckled.  “You have too much confidence in me, Mogami-san.  You haven’t even tried the food.”

Kyoko knelt on the cushion in front of his coffee table, and he sat across from her, taking a sip of his water, heart in his throat.  She murmured the blessing, eyes closed, and he couldn’t help covertly watching her as she took her chopsticks and gathered her first bite.  She closed her eyes, chewing and humming softly, a little smile turning the corners of her mouth.  “Perfect,” she told him softly, meeting his eyes and smiling at him with such a sweet smile that it was hard not to reach out and take her hand.  

“Really?” he couldn’t help asking.  As kind as she was, he knew she would never lie.  Not even to spare his feelings.

“Really.  The vegetables could have been stirred a little more…a few are a little charred.  But the flavor is really good and the rice is perfect.  Congratulations, Tsuruga-san.  You’re officially a chef.”

He shook his head, laughing softly to himself.  “I can cook one thing.”

“Still.  It’s a start.  Good job.”

He couldn’t contain his smile…couldn’t help the way he leaned in.  “It was all thanks to you.”  He held up his water glass, holding it out to you.  “To teamwork.”

Kyoko dropped her eyes, cheeks a little pink, but he couldn’t help the hope that flooded his chest at her bashful smile.  Still, she clinked her glass with his, taking a sip of her water.  

They watched TV while they ate, Kyoko seeming to enjoy every bite.  He knew she wasn’t lying, but he couldn’t help watching her from the corner of his eye, that little smile ever present on her face.  He was still workshopping the menu for his surprise for her, but he’d settled on hamburger steak with American style fries on the side.  Something she wouldn’t get to eat very often…something from his home, although she wouldn’t know it.  How many times had he and Rick grabbed a burger and fries on their way home, him tossing a few fries in his mouth and insisting he didn’t want more.  Rick always telling him he’d always be a scrawny kid if he didn’t eat more.  Back before he’d learned how to eat enough protein to maintain the physique that had helped make him famous here.

But with Kyoko, eating wasn’t such a chore anymore.  He’d never be like his parents, but at least he could sit down to a meal with her and not feel miserable…hell, enjoy it!  Enjoy her company, at least.  He wasn’t sure if he’d ever enjoy eating, but he’d always enjoy being with her.  

She insisted on cleaning up since he’d done all the cooking, and he didn’t argue, letting her do the dishes while he swept the floor and wiped down the counters.  She allowed it, only looking a little guilty, which he took as a win.  But when the dishes were done and the kitchen was clean, he wasn’t sure what else to do.  It was just past lunchtime, which would leave her plenty of time to sit alone in her room and think, the exact opposite of what she wanted.  But before he could think of anything, she placed the last dish in the drainer and turned to him.  

“Thank you for having me.  I’m sorry if I imposed on you today…”

“You didn’t,” he hurried to assure her.  “Not at all.  I should be thanking you for the chance to practice my cooking again.”

“I ought to head home.  Maybe I can pick up a shift at the Darumaya.”

“Are you sure?   You’re welcome to stay here for a little longer.  We could watch a movie or…”

But she shook her head, the stab of rejection going straight through him when she barely looked at him.  “I shouldn’t take up any more of your time.  I’m sorry you had to miss work because of me.”

“I didn’t have to, Mogami-san.  I wanted to.”  He always wanted to.  He always wanted her to call him if she needed him!  He’d happily spend the whole day together, sitting on his couch and watching movies or going for a walk or hell, eating more food if she wanted.  But he couldn’t say any of that…not if he didn’t want to scare her away.  “I can give you a ride home,” he told her instead.

“Oh, no that’s okay.  I can…”

“Mogami-san, I’m happy to do it.  In fact, I’d feel a lot better if you let me drive you.  I would worry if you went on your own.”

She started to argue…opened her mouth to, in fact, but something in his expression made her nod, dropping her eyes once more.  “Okay.  Thank you.”

“Of course.”

The car ride passed in near silence, her staring out the window, him not sure of what to say.  When they reached the restaurant, he went ahead and walked her to the side door, keeping an eye out as she pulled her key out of her purse.  No one else was in the alley, although a few people walked by, and the ever present stream of Tokyo traffic continued.  She unlocked the door, pushing it open and turning to give him one last smile.  “Thank you for the ride.”

“Any time.”

“And thank you again for having me over.  It…it really helped.  I feel much better.”  She gave a quick bow that was maybe a little less formal than usual, or maybe that was just wishful thinking.  After all, she seemed to be avoiding eye contact at all costs as she slipped into the restaurant, not letting him respond before she was gone.  

Ren sighed, turning back to his car.  Kyoko was a mystery that he sometimes felt like giving up on.  Only…he couldn’t.  He knew that…knew that he couldn’t make himself stop caring about her.  Couldn’t make himself stop wanting her company…couldn’t make himself stop loving her.  So, he thought, running a hand through his hair, he would stick to the plan and hope it worked.  He was just about to get into his car and maybe head back to LME when his phone rang, and he glanced down at the president’s number before pressing the accept button and holding it to his ear.  “Takarada-san.”

“Ren?  Is Kyoko-chan with you?”

“I just dropped her off at home.”

“Do you have time for a meeting?”

“I can be there in twenty.  Do you want me to get Mogami-san and bring her too?”

“No…let her rest.  I just wanted to go over a few things”

She wouldn’t be doing much resting, he knew, but decided not to tell him that.  No one, not even the president, was able to stop Kyoko from working when she was determined to.  Besides, he could understand not wanting to sit around and dwell on something.  He’d built his whole life around that very concept, after all.  

He parked in his usual spot at LME, then made his way to Takarada-san’s extravagant office, accepting the cup of tea offered by his assistant, and took a seat on the couch across from the man who was dressed in what he guessed was a pirate costume.  He’d made up his mind a long time ago not to comment on his boss’s outfits too often lest he have to hear more about them, though, so he just sipped his tea, glad for the warmth of it.  The costume was in direct contrast with Takarada-san’s grim expression, and he took a seat across from Ren as he sipped his own tea.

“Is she alright?”

Slowly, he nodded.  “Physically, yes, she’s okay.  She was inside when it happened.”

“I spoke to Kotonami-san.  She’s resting at home for the rest of the day, but she insists she’ll be back at work tomorrow,” he told him wryly.  “I’ll have her on modified duty until she’s cleared by a doctor.  Neither of them has mentioned anything strange happening…the police say this was a random attack, but they are also searching for the delivery driver.  Yoshida Kenji.  Has Kyoko-chan mentioned him?”

He shook his head.  “She never really talks to me about the restaurant.”  Hell, these days, until he’d asked her to help him with those cooking lessons, she rarely talked to him at all.  But even before he’d returned from Guam, Kyoko had almost never talked to him about the restaurant or her life outside of work, as much as he wished she would.  “I know they just hired a new chef.  Touma-kun.  We ran into him when I dropped her off at home a few days ago.  But she said he was friendly, and that he didn’t work today.”  He didn’t mention that the man had been holding a knife…that he'd had to fight the urge not to grab Kyoko and pull her away from him.

“Hm…”  Takarada-san nodded, eyes far away and thoughtful.  “You missed work.”

Ren froze, the tea halfway to his mouth.  Surely he wasn’t about to be reprimanded!  “Mogami-san was in the hospital!  She was alone!”

His boss smiled to himself, letting out a little huff.  “It was good that you were able to be with her.  I just never thought I’d see the day Tsuruga Ren missed work for personal reasons.”  There was nothing scolding in his voice.  In fact, he looked almost proud, and Ren fought not to squirm, taking another sip of his tea instead and fighting to stay composed.  “Do you think this was an isolated attack?”

Ren thought about her cellpohone…about something disappearing from her room when she’d been so sure she’d left it beside her bed.  “I don’t know,” he admitted.  “If someone is stalking her again, she doesn’t seem too worried about it.  She was only worried about Kotonami-san.”  He wondered if his boss knew about her phone or why she’d requested a new one, and he almost brought it up…but in the end, it wasn’t his story to tell.  Besides, maybe he was making something out of nothing.  He could get paranoid, he knew, when it came to Kyoko’s safety, something she seemed to worry very little about.  But she was, for the most part, perfectly capable of taking care of herself.

He just wished she would let him help.

“Is she okay?”

Ren hesitated a little before answering this time.  “She was upset.  But I think she’s better now.”

“Kotonami-san is one of her only friends.  I can imagine how frightening that must have been for her.  Then again…she also has you, as I”m sure she knows.”

“Is that everything?” he asked, lifting a brow, and Takarada-san chuckled.  

“I’ll meet with Kyoko-chan tomorrow morning.  I’ve already informed Yashiro-san.  We’re increasing security around the building for a few weeks.  Just a precaution.  I’m also going to advise Kyoko-san not to go anywhere alone.  I believe Yashiro-san should be able to drive her anywhere she needs to go for work, and I’ll have a driver assigned to Kotonami-san as well for a while.  If your schedules conflict, I can have another driver take Kyoko-san to work.”

He shook his head.  “I can always drive myself.  I don’t mind.”

“Alright.  Whether or not this was targeted, as Kyoko-san gets more roles, she may need to think about alternate living arrangements.”

If she can afford it, he thought but didn’t say, but it was on his mind for the rest of the day as he finished up the meeting, making small talk about his upcoming projects and how things had gone during his last few days as Cain Heel.  He went to the office then, meeting Yashiro and assuring him that Kyoko was okay.  That they’d eaten lunch and that he’d given her a ride home where she was probably going to pick up a shift at the Darumaya.  He even managed to make one of his meetings with a producer for an upcoming modeling shoot and look over some paperwork with Yashiro.  He was sure Kyoko would be happy about that.  

He texted her when he got home a little before ten, sitting back on his couch with the TV on in the background, a drink in hand.  Only one.  Any more and he might say something stupid…might send her a message that showed his hand too soon.  No, Tsuruga Ren was in control at all times, which meant no more than one drink when he was texting Kyoko.  

“I hope your evening went well.  If you need anything, please reach out.”  

There, he thought, placing his phone on the sofa beside his leg.  That was nice and professional, right?  There was no way she could be upset about that.  

The buzz of his phone had him putting the glass of whiskey back onto the coffee table, grabbing the phone once more in the hopes that it was Kyoko.  But when he glanced down at the screen, it just said ‘unlisted number.’  Hitting the decline button, he put his phone back down, but before he could even take a drink, it buzzed again.  Unlisted number.  This time, he pressed the green answer button and held it to his ear.  Maybe it was Kyoko calling from a different number?  

“Hello?”  He’d found it was best not to lead with his name, especially when answering unlisted numbers.  

No answer.   

He pulled the phone away from his ear, checking that the call hadn’t dropped, but the numbers counting the time spent on the call told him that the other person was still on the line.  

“Hello?” he asked again, a little louder.  

Nothing.  Now, though, he could faintly hear breathing on the other line.  

“Mogami-san?” he tried.  But why would she call him from a different number?  And why wouldn’t she answer him?  Had someone else gotten his number?  Maybe a fan?  But how would that have happened?  

There was only silence on the phone for a few seconds, then the soft click that told him whoever had been on the line had hung up.  

When his phone buzzed again, it was a text from Kyoko.  

“My evening went very well, thank you.  And thank you again for today.  Have a good night.”  

Sighing, he downed the rest of his drink and went to take a shower before bed, leaving his phone plugged in by his bedside table.

Chapter Text

“Are you alright, Kyoko-san?”

Kyoko looked up from the tray she was holding and offered the cook her best smile despite the fact that she’d been lost in thought, miles away.  “Yes, thank you.”

“I heard what happened to your friend.  That’s horrible.  You’re lucky you weren’t hurt too.”

She nodded, trying not to think about it…trying not to picture her best friend sprawled out on the ground, or the blood in her hair.  She tried not to remember how weak Moko-san had looked in her hospital bed, or how her sister had been crying.  She knew that Tsuruga-san had been at the hospital with her, but she couldn’t remember what he’d said, only that his arms had been around her, keeping her warm and safe, and that she hadn’t been able to pull away.

She should have pulled away.  She should have been fine on her own.  

Relying on him was only going to make things harder on herself.  She shouldn’t have gone to his apartment or let him cook for her or accepted his ride home.  He was too kind and she was taking advantage.  She was shameless.  She was…

“Are you sure you didn’t see anything?  Any clue might help the police find out what happened.”

“No,” she told him softly, shaking her head.  “I was waiting inside for her.  I only went outside because she was late.”  And Moko-san was never late.  And if she ever was late for some reason, she would call or text, because otherwise it would be rude and Moko-san wasn’t rude.  

She carried the tray of food out to the tale full of couples, carefully placing plates in front of each of them.  Her customer service smile shone bright as she asked if anyone needed anything else, her mind fully on her best friend.  She’d talked to her just that morning…apparently, Takarada-san had ordered her to take a full week off from her acting jobs, and Moko-san was livid.  But her doctor had advised her to rest as much as possible, and Kyoko had reminded her that, as an actress, it was her duty to take care of her body.

But Kyoko didn’t care about her friend’s job as an actress…she cared that she was okay.  Still, her reasoning had worked and Moko-san had been sitting in the Love Me room doing paperwork and menial tasks ever since.  When Kyoko had met with Takarada-san and had given him all the information she knew about what had happened, her boss had seemed troubled, but she’d assured him that nothing like this had ever happened before, and that she had never felt unsafe at the Darumaya before.

And she hadn’t.

Still, all week she’d been distracted.  On edge.  She managed to focus on her job, slipping into her roles as easily as ever, but when she was in her room or even serving customers at the restaurant, she found herself thinking about Moko-san or her lost phone, jumping at shadows in the dark.  The delivery driver, Yoshida-san,  hadn’t been found yet.  Had he quit, she wondered.  Without telling anyone?  Even his boss?  It was unprofessional, but there were people who would do something like that, and it wasn’t like she’d known him personally.  They’d only had a couple of conversations, and while he’d always been friendly, his friendliness had sometimes been a little…too much.  Moko-san had seemed to think he liked her.  

Had he?  But if he’d liked her, would he have just quit his job one day without ever speaking to her again?  Even going so far as to leave his truck?  

That didn’t seem likely.  

She went back to the kitchen for another tray of food, and Touma-san glanced up.  “Are you sure you’re okay, Kyoko-san?”  The genuine concern in his voice made her smile, and she paused as she placed the plates on her tray.  

“Yes, I’ll be okay.  Thank you.”

“I really am sorry about what happened to her.”  His expression was so sad it caught her off guard.  “You have to make sure to be careful when you go out, especially since you’re an actress.”

“I will be.  Besides, my manager drives me a lot of the time.”

“Tsuruga?”

“No!,” she cried, horrified.  “Yashiro-san is my manager.  Tsuruga-san is an actor!”

“That’s right…he’s the one you were practicing with.”

“Yes,” she told him, relieved that no one had heard him.  

“But he drives you home sometimes?”

“He does.  It’s very kind of him.”

“He seems like a nice guy.”

She nodded, well aware of his public persona.  “Tsuruga-san has always been kind to me.  He’s helped me a lot.”

“Really?”

“Yes.  When we were working together for the first time on Dark Moon, he helped me understand my role and find my character.  He did the same for Box R.”

“Natsu, right?”

Her eyes widened a little.  “Oh…Touma-san…you watch Box R?”

He blushed a little, cheeks turning a faint pink as he struggled to meet her eyes.  “Well…I don’t really watch TV very often, but since I found out you were an actress, I wanted to support you.  So I got the DVDs.  Your Natsu is so scary!  And your Mio in Dark Moon was incredible!”

Kyoko couldn’t help her smile, her own cheeks pink.  “Thank you.”

“Do you have any more projects coming up?”

“Well, I’ve been filming for a series, Lotus in the Mire.  It’s based on a book series.”

“I’ll have to read the books.  Who do you play?”

“I play a ninja.”

“Oh, do you get to do cool stunts and fight scenes?”

“I do.  It’s been a lot of fun learning how to stage fight.”

“I can’t wait to see it.”

She felt a little better after that, some worry she’d been holding onto soothed.  It had been silly to be nervous that night with Touma-san.  He’d been so nice to her, and he really had seemed worried about her.  For the rest of the night, he made conversation any time they were together, asking her about acting and telling her about his own past jobs at different restaurants around Tokyo.  When he asked where she was from originally and she told him that she’d grown up in Kyoto, he lit up.  

“Really!  I lived there for a while when I was a kid!  Where did you live?”

She named the inn and he nodded excitedly.  “I know where that is!  We were closer to the city center.”  He asked her if she’d ever gone to the market close to his house and she nodded.

“Yes!  We did a lot of our shopping there when we went into the city.”

“We could have crossed paths without knowing it!”

“Maybe we did,” she agreed, loading up another tray of plates to take out to the dining room.  

It was three more days before she saw Tsuruga-san again, this time in the Love Me room at LME.  Moko-san had been given permission to go back to her normal work under a couple of conditions, and Kyoko was alone, working on some homework before Yashiro-san was supposed to pick her up and take her to the gym where she had a training session later.  She was completely lost in her work when the door opened and Tsuruga-san stepped into the room, ducking a little under the door and smiling in greeting.  

“Good afternoon, Mogami-san.”

“Hello, Tsuruga-san.”  

“It’s been a while.”

It had been…she hadn’t seen him since he’d driven her home from his apartment, mostly because their schedules hadn’t lined up, but also because Kyoko had needed to steel herself before she saw him again.  And she had.  She was not going to let herself think about how kind he’d been or how nice it had felt when he’d held her or how safe he made her feel.

“How have you been?” she asked, speaking as politely and formally as ever.  She needed to put some distance between them.  He was her coworker, after all.  Her senior at work.  Not someone she could have feelings for..

“I’ve been well.  How’s Kotonami-san?”

“She’s doing much better.”

“Good…I’m glad to hear it.  Is she back at work now?”

“Yes.  She’s on set now.”

“And how are you?”

“I’m fine.  Just working on homework before I have to go to the gym.”

“I’m going to be riding with you and Yashiro-san if that’s alright?”

“Oh…of course.”

“After he drops you off, he’s taking me to an R Mandy shoot.”

“I can take the bus to the gym if you’re going to be late…”

“No, we have plenty of time,” he assured her, waving a hand.  “I wanted to ask, I believe Yashiro is supposed to visit his sister and her family this weekend, and he wanted to leave Friday afternoon.  Would you mind if I gave you a ride instead?”

“Oh…of course!  I can take the train or…”

“I was actually going to ask if you’d be willing to have another cooking lesson with me,” he admitted.  “I got a script and there are a couple of techniques I wanted to ask you about.  I can drive you home after.”

She nodded without letting herself think about it.  She couldn’t let him know how she felt about him…couldn’t let on that the thought of going to his apartment again made her heart beat faster.  “Of course.  I’m happy to help!”

He smiled that heartbreaking, grudge-killing smile.  “Thank you.  I really appreciate it.”

She dropped her eyes from his before she lost every last grudge she had left…before she was utterly defenseless.  She couldn’t risk that…not when he might find out how she truly felt.  And he could never find out how she truly felt.  Not unless she wanted to lose him forever.  He certainly wouldn’t be inviting her to his apartment if he knew that she’d fallen in love with him like some pathetic fangirl.  “Of course,” she murmured, focusing on her math homework instead.  Algebra.  If she thought about Algebra instead of him, she would be safe.  

In the car, Kyoko leaned forward a little to meet Yashiro-san’s eyes in the rearview mirror before Tsuruga-san could start another conversation.  “Yashiro-san, you’re going to see your sister this weekend?”

He seemed a little startled, eyes widening.  “Oh…yes.  She just had a baby a few weeks ago, and I haven’t been able to spend much time with her or my new nephew.  I promised to come by as soon as I had a couple of days off.  Ren can drive you on Friday if you don’t mind…”

“Not at all.  Is this her first baby?”  She didn’t really care, but if it kept her from having to look at Tsuruga-san, then she would love to learn every single thing she could about this baby she would probably never meet.

“Her second.  She has a little girl too.”

“Oh, how old is she?”

“Three.”

“Is she excited to have a new little brother?”

“Probably not now that she’ll have to share her parents,” he told her with a laugh.  “I’m sure my sister felt the same about me.”

“Is she older?”

“Two years.”

“I used to wish I had a little brother or sister,” she told him with a wistful smile.  

“You have Maria-chan,” he pointed out, and Kyoko laughed a little.

“I do.  She’s a great little sister.  Do you have siblings, Tsuruga-san?” she asked, feeling rude despite herself for not inviting him to join the conversation.  

He hesitated, and she accidentally met his eyes.  “No,” he finally told her, shaking his head.  “I think my parents had their hands full with me.”

“Were you a trouble maker?” she asked, surprised despite herself.  She knew that he’d smoked when he was younger since he’d had no problem with it as Cain, and she knew that he could fight, but she’d assumed that he’d learned that for a role at some point.  

Tsuruga-san chuckled.  “I don’t know if I would say that.  But I had my moments.”

She was suddenly desperate to know more.  What kind of moments?  Tsuruga Ren was his stage name, she knew, so what was his real name?  Who had he been before he’d been Tsuruga-san?  Actually…if she thought about it, she was pretty sure he’d debuted only a couple of years ago.  When had ‘Tsuruga Ren’ appeared?  She vowed to do more research the next time she was at LME near one of the computers.  She wanted to watch more of his earlier projects anyway, watching the DVDs in the living room when the Okami-san and Taisho weren’t using it, or going to Moko-san’s apartment and watching them together.  Moko-san never minded, especially when she framed it as studying his acting technique.  Which was the reason she wanted to watch them, of course.  

At the gym and then at her filming after, she managed to put all thoughts of Tsuruga-san out of her mind again, focusing only on her work and her role.  She was doing better with the stunts, she knew, and was determined to play Momiji perfectly.  They would be wrapping soon…she was going to give it her best until the very end.  And maybe, once it aired, Tsuruga-san would see…

Not that it mattered.  She was doing this for her own career.  Tsuruga-san had nothing to do with it.

Focus, she reminded herself as she worked.  She just had to focus.  She was going to be a great actress.  That’s why she was working so hard…because this was a career she loved.  

“Kyoko-can?  Are you sure you’re alright?”

The question, asked again in such a short span of time, startled her, and she jerked her head up from where she’d been staring at her own lap in the back seat.  Yashiro-san was driving her home.  He’d insisted, since apparently Tsuruga-san was working later than her today.  The two of them had been quiet so far, Yashiro-san offering a quiet ‘good job’ when he’d caught the end of her filming, handing her a bottle of water.  “Yes.  I’m okay,” she assured him, smiling brightly.  

He winced a little, looking back at the road.  “Have you spoken to Kotonami-san?”

“Yes, we talked on the phone yesterday, and I was going to call her when I got home.”

“Have the police found anything else?”

She shook her head.  “I don’t believe so.  The new chef, Touma-san, said that the police didn’t have any leads.  It’s strange…Yoshida-san hadn’t been working there for very long.  I didn’t know him well, but it seems out of character for him to just quit in the middle of the day.”

Unless, of course, he hadn’t quit.

“I hope nothing happened to him,” she told him softly, staring at her lap again.  

“Me too,” he agreed, sounding sad.  “Has everything been okay at the Darumaya?”

She nodded.  “Okami-san has been nervous…she won’t let me take the trash out in the evenings alone anymore.”

“That’s good.  You have to be careful, Kyoko-chan.”

“I know.  I am.”

“And you know that if you see anything or if you need help, you can always call me.  Or Ren.  Anytime.”

She smiled, feeling warm.  “Thank you, Yashiro-san.”

“I mean it.  If you ever feel unsafe or if you need us, give us a call.”

“I will,” she promised, mostly meaning it.  She doubted she would ever feel comfortable bothering them, but then she thought back to Moko-san…to Tsuruga-san’s arms around her.  How, the moment he’d been there, she’d wanted nothing more than for him to hold her.

That night, she called Moko-san from her room, kneeling on the floor by her table and placing her homework out in front of her.  She still had a few hours before she needed to go to sleep, which was plenty of time to check on her friend, finish her homework, take a shower, and study her script.  So she selected Moko-san’s name in her phone, holding it to her ear as it rant, then smiled when she answered.

“Mo, I’m fine, Kyoko.”

“I was just calling to see how your work went today.”

“No you weren’t.  You were calling to make sure I ate enough and that I didn’t exert myself too much.”

She smiled.  She would take irritated over too weak to lift her head any day.  “ Did you eat enough?”

Kyoko could practically see her rolling her eyes.  “God, this must be how Tsuruga feels.”

“What?”

“When you constantly comment on his eating habits.”

She blushed a little, glad her friend wasn’t here to see it.  “I do not…”

“I ate all three meals.  Breakfast at home that my sister insisted on making for me, lunch at LME, and I ate a bento on set.  I followed all of my doctor’s instructions and didn’t perform any dangerous stunts.  I drank plenty of water all day and rested between scenes.  And I’m going to go to bed early.  I took my pain medication right on schedule.  My sister is here if I need anything. ”  She was quiet for a moment as Kyoko smiled down at her papers.  “Thank you for checking in,” she tacked on, almost reluctantly.  “Maybe next week we can meet up and go jogging again.  I should be cleared for more physical activity by then.”

“Are you sure…”

“I’m not going to spend my life avoiding going out because something awful happened to me.  I’m going to keep living my life like I always have.  And that includes doing things like jogging and, apparently, having sleepovers with you.”

“So…we can have a sleepover next week?” she asked, already planning on researching some low calorie desserts they could make.  

“Maybe.  Let me see what my schedule is like.  I’m still catching up.  Hey, how’s filming for Lotus?”

“It’s going well.  We’ll be filming Momiji’s death scene soon.”

“Did Yashiro-san drive you?”

“Yes, he’s been driving me every day.”

“Good.  We don’t know who attacked me…I still can’t remember anything about it.  You should be careful.  Don’t go out alone.”

“I won’t,” she assured her friend, feeling warm again.  Never in her life had she had so many people looking out for her.  “Yashiro-san or Tsuruga-san are usually available to drive me.”

“Tsuruga-san, huh?  I’ll bet he is.”

“Hm?” she asked, not sure she’d heard correctly.  

“Nothing.  How are those cooking lessons going?”

“Really well.  At our last lesson, he did almost everything on his own.  He’s really improving!  And we’re having another one tomorrow night.  Yashiro-san will be going out of town, so Tsuruga-san is going to drive me home after.”

“I still think he should be paying you for this…”

“Moko-san!”

She snorted.  “Mo, Kyoko.  Relax.”

“He’s done a lot for me,” she told her seriously, voice soft like someone might overhear.  “He’s been really kind and…and I owe him.”

“You’ve done plenty for him too.  Didn’t you do a whole secret project with him?”

“Yes but…”

“And you helped him out with Dark Moon.”

“He helped me too!”

“I’m just saying, it’s not one-sided.  He relies on you too.”

Relied on her.  For some reason, that thought had her heart in her throat.  He didn’t rely on her.  He was her senpei.  He was someone she enjoyed working with and who she wanted to stand on equal footing with one day.  It wasn’t like they were friends.  To be friends, she would have to be his equal, and she wasn’t.  Not yet.  She’d just…gotten lucky.  She’d been in the right place at the right time a couple of times and Tsuruga-san had just benefited from that.  It was nothing to do with her.  Anyone could have done the same.

Footsteps made her pause, and Kyoko pulled her phone away from her ear for a moment, her friend’s voice going far away and tinny as she listened.  Maybe the Okami-san was walking by…although, she’d thought she was in bed.  

“Kyoko?”

“Sorry…I thought I heard something.”

“What?” she demanded, sounding suddenly alarmed.  

“I’m sure it was nothing…”  She stood up, phone pressed to her ear, and made her way to her door.  “I’m going to check, though.”

“What?” she snapped.  “What do you mean?  What did you hear?  Where are you?”

“I’m in my room at the Darumaya,” she told her with a little laugh.  “Don’t worry.  I’m just going to look around.”

“Mo, Kyoko!  Have you ever seen a horror movie?  You can’t just investigate noises by yourself in the dark!”

“It’s not dark,” she laughed, opening her door, light from her bedroom spilling out into the hall.  Nothing.  She found the wall switch and turned it on, peering into the open bathroom door, then down the hall to Taisho and Okami-san’s room.  Their door was shut.  

“But you’re alone!”

“Okami-san and Taisho are in their room.”  She turned and headed for the stairs.  “I’m going to make sure the door to the restaurant is locked.”

“Why wouldn’t it be?”

“I’m sure it is,” Kyoko assured her, unable to help her smile.  Moko-san was worried about her!  She was such a good friend.  Resting her hand on the railing, she made her way down the staircase, flipping the light on as she went.  The whole hall was bright now.  There was nowhere for anyone to hide…not that anyone else was up here.  There was no reason to worry…no reason for her hand to shake just a little.  If she called for her landlords, they would come.  She wasn’t alone.  Just like she’d told Moko-san, it wasn’t dark.  There was nothing to be afraid of.  

Was that a click she’d just heard?  Kyoko paused, holding her breath for a moment and just listening.  Were those…footsteps?  She glanced behind her at the top of the stairs, but no one was there.  

“Kyoko?” Moko-san prompted, voice hushed like she was there with her.

She reached out, hand wrapping around the doorknob.  “It’s fine,” she promised.  And of course, the knob didn’t turn.  “It’s locked.  I told you…”

“Kyoko?”

The voice behind her, too loud in the silence, made her scream before she’d even realized how scared she was, dropping her phone and spinning around, back hitting the door.  Heart pounding, it took her a moment to recognize her landlady, her eyes wide and worried.  

“Kyoko?  Are you okay?” she asked, hurrying down the stairs, and she glanced down at her phone where Moko-san’s terrified voice shouted her name again and again.

“I’m sorry!  I…I’m okay.  I just…”  She reached down and grabbed the phone.  “I’m fine.  It was just Okami-san.  She startled me.”

“Mo, Kyoko!  What the hell!  I thought you were being murdered!”

“I’m okay.  I’ll call you tomorrow?”

Her friend let out a long, exhausted sigh.  “Talk to you tomorrow.”

“I’m so sorry,” she told her landlady, bowing deeply.  “I didn’t mean to wake you.”

“You didn’t,” she assured her as her husband appeared at the top of the stairs, looking around like an attacker might be waiting in the shadows.  “I heard you walking down the stairs.  Is everything okay?”

“Yes!  I thought I heard someone in the hallway and I was just making sure the door was locked.  And it was!  Everything’s okay.  I’m sorry to have bothered you.”

“You didn’t bother us.”  She glanced past her at the door.  “Was that your friend on the phone?”

“Yes.  Mo…Kotonami-san.  She’s doing much better.”

“Good.  Well…if you’re sure everything’s okay, we’re going to bed.”

She nodded, almost frantic.  “Yes, of course.  I’ll see you in the morning.”

But before she followed her up the stairs, she reached back and grasped the doorknob again, giving it one last experimental turn to make sure it was locked. 

Chapter Text

First, the hamburger steak.  

Ren had watched at least three hours worth of Youtube videos on how to make the perfect hamburger steak, some with conflicting information, and he’d done so much experimenting that he thought the workers at the grocery store in his building might be concerned about him.  Never in his life had he bought this much food.  But it had to be perfect.  And so he practiced and practiced every day after work leading up to the day.  He tried different amounts of seasoning and used his meat thermometer to make sure the food was done.  He practiced frying eggs again and again until they looked just like the ones in the restaurant where they’d eaten together when she had been his manager, even going so far as to sample them.  

It all tasted fine to him.  But he needed it to be good.   He wanted her to be impressed!  So he practiced every day after work and got his timing down to a science.

He got off of work two hours before her, which he’d neglected to mention when he’d offered to pick her up.  He would get home as quickly as possible and do everything he could before she got there.  And then, after he picked her up, he would ask her to grab a few things from the grocery store downstairs because he would suddenly have an ‘urgent phone call’ he had to take upstairs.  He would give her a copy of his key card and enough money to cover the groceries…ingredients for summer rolls, which had been the first recipe he’d come across in his online search for easy beginner recipes, along with a couple of extra ingredients that would hopefully take her some time to find.

And then he would run upstairs and finish up.  

He’d timed himself five times, making sure he had the timing down.  He had the recipe for a strawberry cake and fresh strawberries for the top and had practiced using the piping bag until he could get the icing to be mostly presentable.  

The moment he got home from work that day, he got started.  

First the cake.  It would take the longest.  He mixed the ingredients and diced the strawberries and mixed them into the batter and started on the icing while the cake was in the oven.  He pulled out the pans he would need to cook the hamburger and the eggs and sliced the potatoes for homemade fries, letting them soak in ice water because someone on Youtube had told him that it would make them taste better.  

Then the cake had to cool.  He cleaned as he went, not wanting her to think she had to do it later, putting ingredients away and wiping down the counter.  He iced the cake, first something called a crumb coat and then the second layer that he smoothed obsessively.  Then the piped frosting, holding his breath the whole time.  And then, finally, the fresh strawberries on top, the whole thing placed carefully in the refrigerator to keep it cool.

And then it was time to pick her up.  Double checking his clothes to make sure he didn’t look like he’d been baking recently, he drove to the studio where she’d been filming, drawing on every acting skill he’d ever possessed to seem like he wasn’t nervous.  

“How was work?” he asked as soon as she climbed into the car, placing her purse at her feet. She was freshly showered, and he could smell the faint hint of her shampoo.  She must have been filming some of her fight scenes today.  He still wanted to watch her…to get to her set early one day and catch one of them.  Maybe if tonight went well, she’d be open to the idea.   

“It went really well,” she told him with a quick bow of her head.  “How was yours?”

“Everything went fine.  We’re ahead of schedule for the project I’m about to wrap up and I’ve got some other things lined up.”  Including an audition he wasn’t supposed to talk about, so he didn’t bring it up, as much as he would have liked to.  “Have you spoken to Kotonami-san?”

“Yes, we just talked today.  I called her in between jobs.  She’s doing much better…and she told me to stop asking about her eating habits,” she admitted with a sheepish laugh.  

He chuckled.  “It sounds like she’s back to normal.”

“Yes…she mentioned going jogging again once her doctor clears her.”  She hesitated.  “I’m a little nervous about it.”

“I don’t blame you.”  He wanted to remind her to be careful…to ask if she couldn’t move somewhere else.  If she needed help.  If she felt safe.  But that wasn’t his place, so he kept his mouth shut.  If she asked him for help, he told himself, he would give it.  Until then, he just had to trust that she knew what she was doing.  “Do you mind if we stop at the grocery store before we go upstairs?  I have a list of ingredients, and I was going to shop before you came over, but I ran out of time.”

“Of course!  I don’t mind at all,” she hurried to assure him. 

“I have my script too, and I was going to ask you a couple of questions…”

“Absolutley!  I’m happy to help!”

He felt a twinge of guilt at that.  She was always happy to help him.  But, he reminded himself, this was a surprise for her.  She wouldn’t even have to clean up…if he timed it right, he could have everything ready by the time she got to his apartment.

As soon as they parked and made their way to the garage, his phone buzzed, and pulled it out of his pocket with a grimace.  “Oh…”

“Is everything okay?”

“Yes…I’m so sorry, Mogami-san.  I have to take this.”

“No, please!”

“Would you mind…I’m so sorry to ask this of you…”

“What do you need?” she asked, wide-eyed and so ready to help.  

“If I give you the list and the money, could you possibly pick up the ingredients and bring them upstairs?  This call might take a while…”

“Absoltuley!  No problem!” she assured him, determination filling her eyes. 

He hit the answer button on his phone.  “Just one moment,” he told the person on the other line.  “Here’s a copy of the key card and the list.  And some money.”  He handed her all three, and thankfully she didn’t ask why he had all of these things ready.  

“I’ll be up as soon as I can.”

“Thank you, Mogami-san.”

She gave him a quick bow and hurried off to the grocery store, and Ren took off towards the elevator, phone to his ear once more. “Thanks, Yashiro.”

“No problem,” his manager told him dryly, the sound of a baby crying faint in the background.  

“Have a good weekend.”

With that, he hung up, stepped into his apartment, and got to work.

Hamburger steak first.  Fries in hot oil.  He got the cake out of the refrigerator and placed it in the middle of the counter so it wouldn’t be too cold to eat.  The egg was last…he’d learned early on that if he started the egg too early, it would be cold by the time they ate.  So he waited until the fries were nearly done before he cracked the egg with a hand that shook a little.  He was running out of time but he was doing okay.  He was pretty sure they were out of at least one ingredient, or they had been that morning, so she would have to ask a worker and that would buy him some time.  

He plated the food, making sure he got it just right..the egg placed neatly on the burger, and the fries freshly salted and poured on the side.  He hoped she would excuse a technically unhealthy meal…this was a treat.  A thank you.  An offering.  

Kyoko opened his front door just as he placed the plates of food on the counter along with the cake.  Heart pounding in his chest, he hurried to help her with the bags of things he hadn’t really needed.  

“I’m sorry…they were out of the special salt you had on the list, but we should be fine without it…”  She reached down to slip off her shoes, and he took two of the bags from her.  

“It’s no problem.  Thank you again.”

“Of course!  How did your call go?  Is everything alright?”

“Yes, everything is fine.  I’m sorry for sending you on your own.”

“That’s okay.  I don’t mind,” she assured him, stepping up into his living room with the last bag.  “Should we get started?”

He hesitated, gathering his nerve.  “Actually, Mogami-san…I have a surprise for you.”

She paused, tilting her head in that adorable way she had.  “A surprise?”

“Yes.  I…I wanted to thank you for everything you’ve done for me.”

“I haven’t..”

“You have.  You’ve helped me so much, and I want to thank you.  So…”  He took the last bag from her and she followed him silently into the kitchen, staring at the plates of food he’d just finished preparing along with the cake.  Almost blank-faced, she stood as if rooted to the spot, eyes fixed on the hamburger steak.  “You always make dinner when we meet, and then you offered to help me learn to cook for this role, so I wanted to do something for you,” he went on before he chickened out.   Still, there was no response, and he felt his heart in his throat.   “I remembered you said hamburger steak was your favorite….”

Kyoko flinched as though he’d struck her and he went silent, watching her drop her eyes from the food, looking as though she were fighting with herself.  He looked at the food once more.  Three was nothing wrong with it…he’d practiced so many times!  Reaching out, he touched her arm, dropping his hand when she flinched again, and concern warred with hurt.  

“Does it look that bad?” he tried to joke.

“You...you didn’t have to do anything for me.”

“It’s just dinner, Mogami-san.”  It wasn’t.  But it could be, if it upset her this much.  

“No...you went to all this trouble.  This must have taken hours!”

It had.  “I don’t mind.  I wanted to thank you.  And I thought it would be nice to have dinner with a friend.”  The absolute bafflement in her eyes hurt worse than the flinching had, and he felt something in his heart shatter.  Could he not even have that?    “We’re friends, aren’t we Mogami-san?” he asked softly, feeling pathetic. 

The look on her face would have broken his heart if it hadn’t already been broken, the way she shook her head, eyes wide and horrified.  “Tsuruga-san...you’re...you’re my esteemed senpai!  I would never be so disrespectful…”

“How are you being disrespectful?” he practically demanded, exasperation seeping into his voice.

“I couldn’t call you my friend!  You’re my senior and…”

“Don’t you respect Kotonami-san?”

She froze, blinking as if recalculating.  “I...of course.  Yes, of course I respect Moko-san!”

“But she’s your best friend.”

“You...but you aren’t like Moko-san!”  

Still, she refused to meet his eyes and he wanted to know why.  What had he done?  He could tell she was getting upset.  He could see the way her lips trembled...how she glanced to the side, as if looking for an exit.  But he couldn’t make himself stop.  Not now...not when he was so close.  He had to know.  He couldn’t keep doing this...couldn’t stand to be close to her one minute and have her shove him away the next.  

“Why?  Why can’t you see me as your friend?”

“Because!”

“Because why?” he retorted, feeling all of three years old.  “Why?  What did I do to make you keep me at a distance like this?  Why are you always putting up more walls between us?  Is it because I was mean to you when we met?  I’m sorry, Mogami-san.  I...I know I was awful to you, but after everything we’ve been through, I...I just thought…”

His stammering came to an end when he realized she was crying, a hand over her mouth, her whole body hunched over as if she was trying to make herself smaller, backing herself into the corner where his cabinets met. He followed.

“I’m sorry,” she whispered, refusing to look at him even when he leaned over, trying to get closer to her level.

“Why?”

“I never...I didn’t mean to...I just…”

“You just what?” he asked in what he hoped was a soothing voice, one hand easing onto her shoulder.  She didn’t flinch this time…didn’t even seem to notice.

“I didn’t mean to.  I swear...I swear I didn’t mean to!”

Ren was silent, no idea what she could be talking about.  What could she possibly have done that was so horrible?

“I tried to stop it, and...I swear, I will.  I’ll stop it.  And I’ll never say anything about it again and...and I’m not going to trouble you or…”

“Mogami-san, I don’t know what you’re talking about.”  He tried to make his words gentle to put her at ease, but he didn’t think it worked because she sobbed out her next words.

“I don’t know how it happened!  I swore I wasn’t going to be one of those girls that fell in love with you!”

Ren was pretty sure he blacked out, her words, spoken mostly to herself, repeating on a loop in his head.  

One of those girls that...that what?

That fell in love with him?

By the time he’d managed to process that, he realized she was still talking, scooting slowly and carefully around him like he was a wild dog.

“I’m so sorry...I don’t want to lose you.  You’re so important to me and I don’t know what I would do without you...especially these last few weeks but really...since...since I realized...you’ve helped me so much and I know I bother you and take up so much of your time, and I promise I’ll be better!  I…I’ll keep my distance and I’ll make it stop and…”

“You’re in love with me?”  His voice sounded hoarse, his grip on her shoulder tightening just a little to keep her in place.  She froze, head snapping up to meet his gaze, and he wondered again exactly how long he’d been standing there.

“I’m sorry.  Tsuruga-san...I’m so sorry.  I’ll go.  I promise, I’ll never bother you…”

His other hand came to rest on her shoulder and all he wanted to do was kiss her, but he didn’t dare.  Not when he might be hallucinating all of this.  That made sense, he decided.  Because there was no way on Earth that Mogami Kyoko had just confessed to him.

No way. 

But...but she’d said the words.  He couldn’t think of a single other meaning.  What else could that mean?  One of those girls that fell in love with him!  In love.  In love with him.  

He brought one hand up to her face, cupping her cheek and wiping her tears with his thumb.  “I don’t want you to be sorry,” he murmured, trying to show her the intensity of his own feelings without terrifying her.  

That stopped her, lips trembling as she stared up at him with what he thought might be hope.  But hope for what?  Hope that he didn’t hate her?  Or...or hope that he returned her feelings?

“You...you don’t?”

“No.  Not at all.  Not for that.  Never for that.”

“You aren’t mad?”

“No.”

“Or...or disappointed?  Because...I swore I’d never fall in love again!”

“I know.”  He nodded, smiling sadly.  “I am very aware of that.  It’s why I’ve been so afraid to tell you that I’ve fallen in love with you .”  

Her eyes widened, her face going blank, but he kept his hand there for another moment, then wrapped both arms around her, pulling her slowly into his embrace.  To his surprise, she threw his arms around him, face buried in his shirt as she slumped against him, and he closed his eyes, unable to help the smile that took over his whole face.

“I have been in love with you for so long...for longer than I even realized,” he murmured, dropping his cheek onto her hair.  “I hoped that if I could just be with you...just be in your life somehow, that it would be enough.”  

“I thought you’d hate me,” she whispered, tears in her voice, and he could feel them soaking into his shirt.  “I thought you’d never want to see me again.  So I couldn’t let you find out!”

He didn’t know how to tell her that even in some parallel dimension where he didn’t love her, although he couldn’t imagine such a thing, he would never be so cruel.  “I don’t hate you.  I could never hate you.  Even if I didn’t feel the same way, I would never hate you for something like that,” he murmured, shaking his head.  

She took a shuddering breath, pulling back and wiping her eyes.  “If…if you…feel the same,” she started , looking suddenly overwhelmed.  “Then…then does that mean…”

“How about we sit down?  Before the food gets cold?”

“Oh!  The food!  I didn’t even…”

“It’s okay,” he promised softly, letting her go even if it was the last thing he wanted to do.  He wanted to hold her close.  He wanted to feel her arms around him.  He wanted so much…

So much that he couldn’t have.  Not yet.  

Besides, he knew what his fans were like.  And if Kyoko wanted a career in show business, dating someone like him could end it before it really began.  He knew what the rumor mill would say…what the headlines would be.  As unfair as it was, they would be a lot harder on her than they would be on him.

“This looks so good.  I can't believe you did all this,” she told him with a shaky smile. 

“It was all you…well, that, and I watched a lot of YouTube tutorials.”

She laughed, taking the plate he handed her and following him to the table in his living room, legs folding under her as she sat.  She didn’t look directly at him, but he couldn’t help watching her take that first bite.  She closed her eyes and hummed happily, her little smile making his heart clench.  

“This is so good!  It’s perfect!” she cried, beaming at him.

He couldn’t help smiling back.  

This time when she looked away, her cheeks were pink.

Ren took a bite too, and he had to admit, it was pretty good.  

He let her take a few bites, seeming to relax as she ate, but then she spoke again, looking serious.  

“Tsuruga-san…I think that we might be in similar situations,” she told him quietly, looking up from her food.  

“Really?” he asked, surprised. 

She nodded.  “I want to become a great actress.  I can’t afford to let anything stand in my way of that.  And I believe that you are also facing something…I promise, I wasn’t prying into your life.  But when you were acting as Cain, I could tell you were struggling with something and the President confirmed it.”

Jesus, he thought with a sigh…this girl really could read him better than anyone.  “I understand,” he told her with a nod.  “And you’re right.  I can’t have anybody special in my life right now.  I…I didn’t plan on confessing to you.  I just…since I came back from Guam, I’ve felt like you’ve been avoiding me.  And I wanted us to be friends.  I didn’t want you to be so uncomfortable around me.”

Her eyes dimmed, then dropped to her food.  “I’m sorry.  I didn’t mean to make you think…it wasn’t that I was uncomfortable around you.  I had to make sure you never found out.  I didn’t want to lose you,” she admitted in a near whisper, her smile sad.  “You mean so much to me.  And even though I knew that you couldn’t feel the same way, I couldn’t stand the thought of not having you in my life at all.”

Ren didn’t think about his next move…didn’t plan to pull the necklace over his head.  But the next thing he knew, he was placing it over hers instead, her wide eyes shooting up to meet his.  “I can’t start a relationship right now.  And neither can you.  But I hope you can accept this as a promise.  You have my heart, Mogami-san.”

Her cheeks darkened, and her eyes shot down to the food he’d made, then up to him before she seemed to make a decision, jumping up and grabbing her purse and pulling out the tiny coin pouch, tipping it into her hand and spilling her little stone into her palm.  “Then…I know it’s not really valuable but…I hope you’ll accept this.  Because you have my heart too.”

Ren took the familiar stone, squeezing it in his hands before bringing it up to his lips.  “Thank you,” he murmured, wishing again that he could pull her into his arms and hold her instead.  “In the meantime, could you stop avoiding me?” he asked with a wry smile, and she nodded, cheeks still bright red.

“Yes!  Of course.  I’m sorry.”

“And can we be friends?”

She stared at him, uncertain.  “Friends?”

“Friends,” he confirmed, well aware of how hopeful he looked.  “Like you and Kotonami-san.”

For a moment, she just looked at him, obviously reading his expression.  And then she swallowed hard as though gathering her resolve and gave a single nod.  “I…yes.  Yes.   We can be friends,” she declared, as serious as if she were about to go to battle.  

Ren couldn’t help his chuckle.  “Does that mean I can call you Kyoko-san?”

Somehow, her cheeks seemed to turn an even more vibrant shade of red and she covered them with her hands, closing her eyes and looking as adorably flustered as if he’d kissed her instead of the stone.  “Um…I…might have to get used to that.”

“That’s okay.  We can practice.”

That didn’t seem to comfort her, but she nodded anyway.  

“And you can call me Ren.”

“I couldn’t…” she started, horrified, but he waved a hand.  

“Sure you can.  We’re friends.  That’s my name.  I’m giving you permission.”

“But…that’s your first name!”

Chuckling, he nodded.  “Yes.”

“I…I should at least call you Ren-san!”

He grinned.  “That’s fine.”  Honestly, that’s what he’d been hoping for, knowing already that she would probably never just call him without honorifics.  

Kyoko gave him a look, seeming suspicious, but didn’t call him out.  Instead she went back to her food, and he turned the TV up enough that they could hear it.  

“So, how was work, Kyoko-san?”

She flinched, and he had to bite back another laugh.  “Um…it was…it went well.”

“Do you have any plans for this weekend, Kyoko-san?”

Her jaw clenched a little.  “I don’t have any scenes to film until Monday, but one of my acting classes meets tomorrow morning and I’ll be catching up on school work.  And on Sunday, I’ll be working an evening shift at the Darumaya.”  She took another bite, humming happily under her breath.  

“Is that good, Kyoko-san?”

She finally broke, shooting him a deadpan look, and he laughed aloud, taking a bite of his food with an unrepentant grin.  After a moment, her lips twitched a little.  “You don’t have to keep saying it.”

“I wanted to practice.”

He gave in when she insisted she should help him do the dishes since he’d done all the cooking, standing side by side with her at the sink, seeming more at ease with him than she had in weeks.  After a moment of silence, she glanced up at him.  “Thank you for tonight.  No one has ever…”  She swallowed, eyes dropping to the plate in her hands.  “Thank you.”

“Of course.  I’m glad you liked it.”  He wanted to say more…that he would gladly cook for her as often as she would let him.  That he’d learn to make all of her favorite foods just to see her smile like that.  That she deserved someone who took care of her like she took care of everyone else.  One day, he thought, after they had both reached their goals, he would tell her all that.  For now, he would just have to show her.

Chapter Text

Tsuruga-san sat beside her in the car, a soft smile on his face as he drove her back to the Darumaya…

No.

Ren-san sat beside her in the car. 

He returned her feelings.  She had his heart, along with his famous pendant necklace hanging around her neck, hidden under her clothes, nestled next to her heart.  All of those smiles and the way he spent time with her and gave her rides and sought her out…all of that was because he was in love with her.  In love.   With her!   How could that be possible?  For a moment, all she’d been able to do was throw her arms around him and sob, her relief all encompassing.  She wasn’t going to lose him…this man she cared so much about.  Who she loved acting with and working with and just being with.  

She wasn’t going to lose him.  He didn’t hate her.  

He loved her.

And no, neither of them were ready for a relationship.  Kyoko knew that he had his own past…secrets she didn’t know about.  Something that had happened to him that had made acting as Cain Heel so difficult at times…a darkness she didn’t understand.  Tsuruga Ren was his stage name, after all.  It didn’t matter to her what his real name was, but she hoped he would tell her one day.  She hoped he could face his demons and beat them, and that he would let her help if she was able.  

But she also knew that she could not enter into a relationship with Tsuruga Ren right now.  Even if she had felt ready for a romantic relationship, which she didn’t, not really, as her experiences with romance involved pining after Shotaro and whatever she’d seen on television and in movies, she had her career to think of.  She wanted to be an actress.  A great actress.  She wanted to stand alongside Tsuruga-san…

Ren-san.

She wanted to stand alongside Ren-san as one of the great actors of their time.  She wanted to develop new characters and put her experiences to use developing her acting skills.  She wanted to be in different projects and travel and see new places.  She wanted to be great.  And if the public found out that she was in a relationship with Tsuruga Ren, then that could be the end of her career.  His fans might hate her.  Harass her.  Make it harder for her to live her everyday life, much less go to work.  Directors might not want to work with her.  Or worse, people might start to say that the only reason she was getting jobs was because of her relationship.  And she would not let anyone believe that she’d gotten this far because of anything but her own talent and hard work.

Still…her mind kept going back to the pendant resting against her heart under her shirt.  She kept thinking about the way he’d smiled at her.  How it had felt to have his arms around her.  He wanted to be her friend.  And he’d asked so earnestly, looking so hopeful…and there was no reason to try and hide her feelings for him anymore.  No reason to keep constructing walls around her heart when she knew what was inside.  She wasn’t sure exactly what friendship with Tsuruga-san…

Ren-san.  Ren-san.

She wasn’t sure what exactly friendship with Ren-san would entail.  She thought about Moko-san and what they did together.  They’d gone to a theme park together, and that had been fun, but Ren-san was too famous for that unless he went in disguise.  They spent time together at work, but she and Ren-san already did that.  They had sleepovers…

Her cheeks went hot and she turned to stare out the window, watching the city fly by as he drove her home.  Not sleepovers.  Obviously.

But they already spent time together at his place.  She cooked for him sometimes, and he had cooked for her, something that had almost made her cry as she’d bitten into her hamburger steak.  Never in her life had anyone found out what she liked to eat and learned to cook it.  Shotaro would never, of course.  His parents…well, they hadn’t either.  Not really.  But they’d already known how to cook.  

Tsuruga-san hadn’t even known how to chop vegetables when they’d started.  And tonight he’d surprised her with such a delicious meal…she wanted to thank him again, but she’d already thanked him several times and praised his cooking and helped him clean up.  Any more might make him uncomfortable.

They’d watched TV as they’d eaten, the entertainment news channel on in the background, and it had struck her how comfortable she was in his home.  How much she enjoyed being there, even if she’d been so intimidated the first time she’d stepped foot in his giant apartment.  It felt familiar..she knew where everything in his kitchen was.  She had a pair of slippers that she used every time.  She even knew her way around the grocery store in his building. 

“Moko-san has a big audition this week,” she told him, mostly to fill the silence.  “We’ve been practicing speaking English.”

“Oh, what day?” he wondered.

“Wednesday!  I hope she gets it!  She mentioned that she might be filming overseas.”

He hummed to himself, thoughtful.  “Would you like to film overseas?”

She nodded, eyes staring out the windshield.  “I would love to.  Apart from when we went to Guam, I’ve never left Japan.  You’ve filmed in a lot of places though, right?”

He turned onto the street that led to the Darumaya, glancing over at her as he drove.  “A few, although I haven’t done any filming in the United States yet.”

“It would be exciting to film there!  And you speak English, so you wouldn’t have any trouble.  Moko-san and I have been having English lessons whenever we can so she can practice, although I know my English is too formal.”

“You learned in the inn growing up, right?”

She nodded.  “Yes.  And in school.  Is that how you learned?” 

“I uh…I had family in the United States,” he told her after a moment.  “So I spoke it growing up.”

She didn’t ask him any more questions…he didn’t talk about his own past or his family very often, and she didn’t want to pry.  One day, she thought, maybe he would tell her more.  For now, she was content to tell him about the inn where she grew up when he asked, and about how she’d practiced speaking English with the guests.  

He pulled up to the alley behind the Darumaya, turning to her with a warm smile that sent goosebumps up and down her arms.  Her first instinct was to look away like she was used to doing…to find some excuse to get out of the car as quickly as possible. Instead, she smiled back, reminding himself that he knew.  And he felt the same.  And there was no one around to care if she blushed at the way he smiled at her, or to see her own smile back.  “Thank you for having dinner with me.”

“I should be the one thanking you!  You made me dinner and it was so good!  I can’t believe you were about to make something so delicious after just a few lessons.”

“That’s a testament to how great of a teacher you are.”

She shook her head, cheeks going pink.  “You’re just a fast learner.”

He chuckled, shaking his head.  “Still.  Thank you.”

“You’re welcome.  And thank you.”

“You’re welcome.” he told her with a grin.  And she was about to respond…to tell him to have a good night, when she saw something just past him and the smile dropped from her face, brow furrowing in concern.  He paused, turning to follow her line of sight, then glanced back at her.  “Kyoko-san?”

He’d been throwing her name into sentences, seemingly as ‘practice’, but she thought he might just be teasing her.  She’d been telling herself that he was using her stage name, after all, and that everyone called her that.  Now, though, it barely registered as she looked around the empty alley, then started to get out of the car.  

“Kyoko-san?” he asked again, opening his own door.  She felt like she had when she’d been on the phone with Moko-san…a little confused.  A little scared.  But Tsuruga-san…

Ren-san!

But Ren-san was here with her.  She wasn’t in any danger.  

“They left the door ajar," she explained, purse on her shoulder as she hurried over to the door, him just behind her.

“What?  Who?”

“I’m not sure…”  It was late…the restaurant was closed, and surely the Okami-san and Taisho would be in bed.  She opened the door, looking around the back of the kitchen where they received deliveries, but it was dark and empty.  Behind her, Ren-san stood close enough that she could feel the warmth of his body on her back, and that was nearly enough to distract her.  “It’s not safe to leave the door open…maybe Touma-san forgot when he left?  I’ll talk to Taisho tomorrow morning.  Anyone could have come in.”  She shook her head, turning back to Ren-san apologetically.  “I’m sorry.”

“Don’t be.  Why don’t I come in with you…make sure no one is here.”

“Do you think someone would be?” she asked, head cocked.  

“Maybe…let me check just in case?”  

The worry in his voice took her aback and she nodded.  “Of course.  Come in.”  She shut the door behind him, turning the lock just in case, and flipped on the light switch in the kitchen.  He looked around the back shelves, peering into the storage closet, and Kyoko went into the front of the kitchen where the counter was, looking around the dining room.  “I don’t think anything is broken.  I’ll just…”  

And then she froze, the words dying in her throat, and she was running before she even knew she was, shoving her way through the little gate that blocked the counter from the public, past tables and a chair whose leg caught her ankle, sending her sprawling, but she barely slowed down, scrambling to her feet and running again. 

“Kyoko-san?” Ren-san called from the back, but she didn’t stop.  Couldn't answer.  Couldn’t breathe. 

She dropped to her knees by Okami-san’s side, trying to take it in, her hand clasping the older woman’s.  She lay in a heap at the bottom of the stairs, the door leading to their living quarters standing open.  “Okami-san!  Okami-san!” she cried, squeezing her hand, one hand touching her cheek.  There was no blood…it wasn't like Moko-san, but it felt the same.  Kyoko scrambled for her phone with shaking hands, her breaths coming in desperate pants because suddenly, getting her phone out of her pocket felt impossible.  

“Kyoko-san.”  Suddenly Ren-san was kneeling beside her, a hand on her shoulder.  “Scoot over a little,” he urged, voice serious, and she did, watching him place his fingers to the side of her throat.  “She’s breathing.  I’m going to call an ambulance.”  He pulled out his own phone as if it was the easiest thing in the world, and Kyoko jumped up, stepping over her legs to reach the stairs and began running up them, taking them two or three at a time.  “Kyoko-san!”  He called after her, sounding horrified.  “Kyoko!”

Her first name, used without honorifics, barely registered as she ran past her own closed door to Taisho and Okami-san’s bedroom.  She knocked, relieved to hear the older man’s snoring in the other room that came to an abrupt halt when she started beating on the door.  

“Taisho!” she called, knocking again and again.  She never knocked on their door…never disturbed them in their bedroom.  She didn’t think she’d even ever seen inside of their bedroom. “Taisho!”

He came to the door, sleep-rumpled and wide-eyed, and Kyoko forced the words out as she struggled to breathe.  “Okami-san..fell…stairs!”  She pointed, and he ran past her, and the world took on a strange, faw-away quality as she followed, pausing only for a moment to look at her own door.  It was closed, just like she’d left it.

Had Okami-san fallen?  

What else would have happened?  What room had she been talking about?  Kyoko’s room?  Why had she been out of bed in the middle of the night?

At the base of the stairs, Ren-san was talking to the first responder on the phone and she could hear a siren that she hoped was the ambulance.  She sat down on the stairs, not wanting to get in the way…not able to do anything but watch as Taisho knelt beside Ren-san, their voices hushed and serious and then she closed her eyes, dropping her face into her hands.

What was happening?  First Moko-san, and now Okami-san?  But they couldn’t be related because Moko-san had been attacked outside and there had been no one around to attack Okami-san.  She must have just tripped and fallen!  That could happen to anyone.  

But the back door had been open.

Only once the EMTs came inside with a stretcher did Okami-san start to stir, moaning softly as she moved her head, turning to face her husband who knelt at her side.  He clutched her hand, leaning in and saying something Kyoko couldn’t hear.

“I thought…her room…”  And then she was silent again and one of the EMT’s helped move her to the bed that, with a push of a button, lowered to the ground, then raised up once more.  Then Ren-san was there, a hand on her knee as he knelt in front of her on the stairs.

“They’re taking her to the hospital now, and her husband is riding with them.  She’s awake and responsive…they think she might have broken her ankle, but she’ll be alright.  They’re not too worried.  She’s okay.”  And then a pause…maybe a long pause.  She wasn’t sure.  “Kyoko-san?”

She blinked and something warm trailed down her face, her breath catching in a shudder.  He moved to sit beside her then, an arm wrapping around her shoulders.  

“She’s alright.  She’s okay,” he murmured, hand on her back, rubbing up and down.  “She’s going to be okay.”

“She…she’s…”  But how could she say what Okami-san was to her?  That her own mother had never loved her and Sho’s mother had seen her as a potential wife for her son and that Okami-san wasn’t her family but that she felt like family.  That she and her husband had taken Kyoko in and didn’t make her pay as much rent as she should have been and were never upset when she couldn’t work many shifts and were always supportive of her.  How they’d come to her Happy Grateful Party and had given her a birthday present even though she wasn’t their daughter or their family…she was just a girl that lived in their apartment.  

“We can go to the hospital if you want.  Do you want me to drive you?”

She nodded, barely able to comprehend what she was asking.  And it was almost like before, with Moko-san.  One moment, she’d been sitting on the stairs, his arm around her, vaguely aware that she shouldn’t be asking him to drive her all the way to the hospital, but he’d offered and she couldn’t bring herself to say no.  Then she was in his car.  Then she was in the waiting room at the hospital, this time with Ren-san and Taisho who sat in the chair across from her, silent as ever, face drawn, jaw tight.  He’d put on a pair of sandals he usually used to take out the trash, and he had his hands clasped in front of him, seemingly staring at nothing.  She didn’t know what to say to him…part of her wanted to move to his side and take his hand. The other wanted to curl up in a miserable all and cry.

When she looked up again, he was gone, and she looked around, confused, afraid, as illogical as it was, that something had happened to him.  

“He went to sit with her,” Ren-san told her softly when she met his eyes, apparently reading the panic there.  He had a hat pulled over his eyes and when she just looked at him, understanding but still so afraid, he wrapped his arm around her shoulders, letting her lean on him.  For some reason, it didn’t feel strange.  They were friends, after all.  So it was fine.  And like Corn, he made her feel so safe.  So warm and happy.

“She…do you think she heard something?  Like when I was on the phone?”

“What do you mean?  When you were on the phone?”

“It was a few days ago.  I was on the phone with Moko-san and I thought I heard something and…and I went to check the door to the public area to make sure it was locked.  And Okami-san heard me and came out to check on me.  Do you think she heard something too?  The door was open but…I didn’t see anything missing.  I didn’t go in my room but…there’s nothing in there worth stealing.”  

“Was the door locked?  When you checked before?”

She nodded.  “Yes.  It was locked.”  There was no point in telling him that she’d thought she’d heard something on the other side of the door.  She must have been imagining things.

“You said nothing was missing?  Tonight?”

“I don’t think so…the money is always locked away in the safe, and that was still closed.  Only Taisho and Okami-san have the combination.  And…and if they didn’t want the money…”

“I think we should go back to the restaurant and check your room.  And if anything is missing, I think we should call the police.” 

So they did.

Kyoko left a message with the front desk staff, asking them to let Taisho know that she was going back to the restaurant and to call her if he needed anything, then sat in Ren-san’s car as he drove her back, eyes glazed over, head swimming.  She was so tired…a glance at the dashboard told her it was past 3 in the morning and she sat up, heart in her throat.  He would need to get up for work soon!  And so would she but that was beside the point.  If he didn’t get enough rest and couldn’t do his job, it would be her fault!

“Tsu…Ren-san…you should go home!”

“I will,” he assured her easily, as though it wasn’t close to 3:30am.  “Don’t worry.  I’m fine.”

“But…you need to sleep!”

“I will.”

She stared at him, baffled by his easy acceptance of all of this…he’d called an ambulance and had wanted to go inside with her to keep her safe and now he was losing sleep because of her.  Because they were friends?  Because he loved her?  She found she didn’t care.  Instead, she shifted a little closer in her seat, resting her head against the headrest and closing her eyes.  She couldn’t remember the last time she’d been so tired and so horribly wide awake.

When they reached the Darumaya, she used her key to unlock the back door, but he stopped her with a hand on her shoulder before she could go in.  “Let me go first,” he urged softly, stepping in front of her and looking around once he was inside.  It was the same as before, though, the downstairs area untouched.  Next, he led the way upstairs, and she took a moment to be grateful that she’d taken down her posters of him and Shotaro before opening her bedroom door, him waiting in the hall while she looked around. Her futon had been tucked away in the corner.  Her makeup was untouched.  One of the drawers of her dresser where she kept her underclothes was slightly open, but it was an old dresser and the drawers didn’t always shut all the way.  Her phone charger was still there.  So was Princess Rosa.  She peered into her dresser drawer…nothing was gone, as far as she could tell, although she had no idea why anyone would take her clothes.  

“I don’t think anything is missing,” she told Ren-san who hovered in the doorway.  

He nodded, giving the hallway a once over.  “Good…hopefully it was just like you said…maybe she heard something and started to go downstairs and tripped.”

“Thank you again for driving me.”

“Of course.”

“I’d better get some sleep…”

Ren-san glanced down the hallway again, hesitating before speaking.  “Kyoko-san, why don’t you come back to my place and sleep in my guest room?  I’m sure it was just an accident, but just in case.”

“Oh…I don’t want to put you out…”

“You aren’t.  Not at all.  I’d feel a lot better if you weren’t here alone.”

And as much as Kyoko wanted to insist that she was fine…that she wasn’t worried about being here alone or what had happened with Moko-san or what had happened a few nights ago or tonight…she didn’t want to be here alone.  Because no one else should have a key but what if she woke up and someone was downstairs?  What if she heard something and no one was here with her?  What if, somehow, someone else did have a key?

“Are you sure?” she asked, her voice weak.

“Yes.  I’m sure.  You’d be doing me a favor.”

She had to smile.  “Okay…let me get a bag.”

“Of course.  I’ll be right out here.”  And he stepped away from the doorway, leaving her to pack with hands that still shook.

It was 4 in the morning when they reached his apartment.   She stared at the dashboard clock, watching the numbers change until he parked, climbing out and opening her door for her.  “We should call the President to tell him what happened.  What time do you need to be at work tomorrow?”

“Um…I’m supposed to be at LME to do Love Me work at 8 and on set at 1,” she told him around a yawn.

“As soon as we talk to Takarada-san, I’ll call Yashiro and let him know to pick you up here.”

She nodded, wiping her hand over her eyes as she leaned against the elevator wall, the soft humming almost enough to put her to sleep.  She had been awake for so long…and she was going to have to get up early again and go back to work and somehow film a fight scene.  She kept her eyes closed until the elevator stopped on Ren-san’s floor, and he led her to his apartment, ushering her inside first where she sat immediately, slipping out of her shoes and fighting the urge to just lay down on the floor.

Ren-san already had his phone to his ear, kneeling to pull one shoe off, then the other as the phone rang.

“Do you think Takarada-san will be up so early?”

“He always wakes up early,” he told her dryly.  “Hey boss.”

The greeting took her aback, but his eyes were closed, head against the wall.  She didn’t hear Takarada-san’s reply, but Ren-san sighed.

“I’m with Kyoko-san.  Her landlady was in an accident.  We think she fell down the stairs.”  There was a moment of silence, and then Ren-san held out a hand to her, helping her to her feet.  “Okay.  Just a second.”  He held out the phone to her.  “He wants to talk to you,” he told her softly, and she carefully took the phone and held it to her ear.

“Takarada-san?”

“Good morning, Kyoko-san.”

“Good morning.”  She tried to smile.  “I’m sorry to bother you so early.”

“Don’t worry about it.  Are you alright?”

“Yes…I’m…I’m fine.  I wasn’t hurt.  I think…um…I think she might have heard something downstairs?  Maybe she was checking the door to the public area and slipped on the stairs?  The back door was open when Ren-san took me home after our cooking lesson.  But nothing was taken or missing from the restaurant.”

“Has that door been unlocked recently?”  

“Only once.  When…um…when my phone went missing.”

“Sawara-san mentioned that your phone had been lost.  Do you think someone took it from your room?”

“I’m not sure why they would,” she admitted.  

“Are you staying with Ren tonight?”

“Yes.  He offered his guest room.”

“Good.  Will your landlords be home again tomorrow?”

“They should be.”

“Alright…I’ll have Sawara-san adjust your schedule tomorrow.  You were scheduled for Love Me work before you were supposed to film, right?”

“Yes.  I’ll be in at 8 to work on Love Me work!  Ren-san is going to call Yashiro-san to let him know…”

“Don’t worry about the Love Me work for the morning.  You can report straight to set at 1.”

“Oh…but…Takarada-san…”

“Get some sleep, Kyoko-san.  I’ll contact Yashio later today.  He can give you a ride to set.  Let me know if you need anything.”

“Thank you, Takarada-san.”

“Of course.”  

She handed the phone to Ren-san, yawning and watching as he took the phone and held it to his ear.  He listened for a moment, nodding to himself as though Takarada-san was in the room with them.  “Yes, sir.”  A long pause.  “I will.”  Another pause.  “Alright.  Thank you.”  Yawning into the back of his hand, he pocketed his phone.  “Alright, Kyoko-san.  How about we get some sleep?”

She nodded.  That was the best idea she’d heard all day. 

Chapter Text

The ringing of a phone jerked Ren from a dream about Kyoko that he immediately forgot.  Groaning and blinking gritty eyes in the darkness, he put a hand to his face and swore, then turned to see his cell phone sitting a few feet away beside his alarm clock, the little rectangle seeming to light up the entire room.  It ran again and he prayed it wasn’t another fan that had gotten his phone number.  Even if it was, he thought, why would you do something so cruel to someone you supposedly loved.  He’d never call Kyoko at 3:30 in the morning, after all.  Shaking his head at himself at his exhausted, half formed thoughts, he grabbed the phone and squinted at the screen as a bolt of lightning split the air outside his window.

Mogami Kyoko.

It had been two days since Kyoko had stayed over…since her landlady had fallen down the stairs.  She was still in the hospital, recovering from a surgery on her leg, and, according to Kyoko, she would hopefully be allowed to come home soon.   In the meantime, Kyoko had gone back to the Darumaya, something Ren wanted to protest against, but it wasn’t like he could just offer to let her move in.

Well…he could.  But there was no way she’d say yes..  And he doubted that would help their current situation of trying to be friends.  Just friends.  

Still, he’d been unable to keep from daydreaming once or twice…imagining a life where he came home to her in the evenings, or vice versa.  Where they ate meals together and watched TV and read lines together.  Where she was comfortable in his home.  Where his home was her home too.  It seemed too good to be true…but she shared his feelings.  She was in love with him.  She had been so standoffish with him because she’d been so afraid of him finding out about her feelings.  

He knew that she’d been picking up more shifts at the restaurant to try and help out, but that they would either have to hire another person temporarily or close for a few days while her landlady recovered.  He hoped they could afford to do the former.  That was Kyoko’s home.  He wasn’t sure what she would do if she lost it…if the restaurant had to close for good.  She couldn’t afford to pay more, he was sure, even with the jobs she was picking up.  

But none of that explained why she was calling him this early.  Surely, he thought with a sigh, she wasn’t calling to ask for more modeling tips.  Trying to make his voice sound a little friendlier than he felt and bracing himself for what he was sure would be a string of frantic apologies for waking him, he hit the answer button and held the phone to his ear.  “Good morning, Kyoko-san,” he muttered, dropping back onto the pillow and closing his eyes.  The honorific had been tacked on, but hopefully she’d be too tired to notice.

“I...Tsuruga-san...I mean...Ren-san, I’m...I’m so sorry to bother you.”

His eyes snapped open and he sat up, feeling less tired by the second.  Her voice shook, and he couldn’t tell if she was shivering or crying...or both.  But in the next second, her breath caught in a sob, and he clutched the phone.  “Kyoko-san?  Are you alright?”

“I’m...I’m so sorry to wake you.  I didn’t know where else to go…”

“Go...what do you…”

“Can I come in?  Please?”

He took a second for her pleading words to sink in, but then he was throwing his legs over the bed.  “Are you outside?” he demanded, looking at the clock again before jumping to his feet and looking around for his robe, finally finding it and throwing it around his shoulders, then grabbed his keys off the dresser, phone sandwiched between his cheek and his shoulder.   It was 3:31  in the morning!  It was pouring!  

As if to reinforce this fact, thunder seemed to shake the building. 

“Yes...I’m sorry.  I...I didn’t know…”

It was getting harder to understand her words through the stuttering and shaking, and he shoved his keys into his pocket, racing for the front door.  “It’s okay.  It’s fine.  I’m on my way down.  Just a minute…”

He thought she might have apologized again, but he shook his head, shoving his bare feet into shoes and racing for the elevator.  

“It’s okay.  I’ll be down in just a second.  Are you hurt?”

“Um...not really…”

With Kyoko, that could include anything from a paper cut to a fractured bone in his experience, so he didn’t take a lot of comfort in that as he jabbed the down arrow with his finger.  “I’ll be right down.  I’m in the elevator.”

“Okay.  Thank you…I’m sorry…”

He shook his head but didn’t bother trying to assure her that everything was okay again.  He’d just have to wait until he saw her.  Thankfully it was a fast elevator, and as soon as the doors opened into the lobby, he practically ran out of the elevator, stopping short when he saw the man at the front desk staring out the front door.  The doorman, too, was staring outside, and he hurried to the door where he found Kyoko waiting outside, arms wrapped around herself, soaked by the rain that still poured from the sky.  Muttering an ‘excuse me’ he finally hung up and pocketed his phone, then slipped past the doorman and out into the storm.

She was wearing pajamas.  A t-shirt and thin and loose pants were plastered to her shaking body, a pair of sandals doing nothing to project her feet.  The pants were ripped on one side along her shin, and he thought he saw blood.  Behind her, a car waited, a woman watching them from the driver’s seat.  

“I’m sorry,” she started, then glanced back at the car, lips trembling.  “I had to take a cab but I don’t have my purse…”  

He took his bathrobe off and draped it around her, then hurried over to the cab and pulled out his wallet.  “How much?” he called over the storm.

Wide-eyed, the driver told him, and he prayed she wasn’t about to take a picture with her phone.  It wouldn’t be the end of the world if a photo of him in pajamas, soaking wet in front of the building where he lived, were to end up online, but it wasn’t something he wanted to deal with at the moment.  Not on top of everything else.  Thankfully, she just thanked him when he paid her, then drove off.  He didn’t watch.  Instead he practically ran back to Kyoko and wrapped an arm around her, herding her back to his building.  

“I’m so sorry…” she started again.

“It’s okay.  Come on.  Let’s get you inside.”

“I’ll pay you back…” Thunder shook the whole city, cutting her off.

He just shook his head, guiding her ahead of him as the doorman opened the door for them.  She was limping, but nothing seemed life threatening at least.  The moment the door shut behind them, the deafening sound of the rain was muffled.  “This is Mogami Kyoko,” he told the doorman and the man who stood behind the front desk.  Both looked between them with wide, startled eyes.  “If she ever comes here, let her in.  Let her into my apartment if she asks.  Just...please.  Put it in my file.”

“Of course, Tsuruga-san,” the receptionist told him, nodding and typing almost frantically on the computer.

“Thank you.”  He struggled to keep his voice even and calm, despite feeling the exact opposite.  Glancing down at Kyoko, he found her staring straight ahead, not seeming to notice the other people in the room, or the fact that blood was dripping down her leg as she shook so hard her teeth chattered.  He put a tentative arm around her, guiding her towards the elevator, and she stumbled along, eyes vacant.  The only thing on her was her cellphone clutched in one pale hand, his bathrobe engulfing her and hopefully warming her up just a little.  

She was silent even when they reached the penthouse, him hurrying to unlock the front door and guide her inside where she sat down in the entryway, reaching down with shaking hands to unhook her sandals. 

“I’ll be right back,” he told her softly, but she barely seemed to notice, and when he returned with a towel, she hadn’t moved, one hand still on the buckle of her right sandal.  Her whole body shook, lips trembling, and she didn’t even look up when he sat beside her, easing the bathrobe off of her shoulders and wrapping the towel around her instead.  Absently, she buried one hand in the dry fabric.  “Kyoko-san?”

No response.

“Let me help,” he urged, unbuckling her sandal and easing it off of her foot, then doing the other one.  She let him, as passive as a doll, then took the hand he held out, following him over to the sofa and sitting down, the towel still wrapped around her shaking shoulders.  

“I’m sorry…” she finally whispered, eyes not quite focusing on him.

“You don’t have to apologize.  I’m not upset...I’m just glad you’re safe.  Let me get you something hot to drink, and then you can take a shower.  I’ll find you something to wear.”

Even more worrying than the blood or the hour she’d shown up on his doorstep was the way she nodded, not even putting up a token protest.  Still, first things first.  He had to get her warmed up.  So, leaving the remote directly in front of her on the coffee table, he all but ran to the kitchen, made her a cup of hot tea, then returned to find her in the exact same position.  She took the tea, though, trembling all over.

“Take that to the bathroom.  I’ll leave some clothes in the guest room for you.  Then we can look at your leg.  How did you hurt it?”

“I fell.”

“Where?”

“Outside the Darumaya.”

“Okay…”  Deciding it was more important to get her warmed up than to get answers, he held out a hand, letting her lean on him for a moment before guiding her to the guest room.  She didn’t thank him or beg his forgiveness…just wandered towards the bathroom, clutching her drink, towel wrapped around her shoulders, and he shut the door with a lump in his throat.  This was bad.  It had to be.  Nothing short of a disaster would make Kyoko not only wake him at 3 in the morning and come to his house, but also let him pay for her cab.

Where was her purse?  Why was she even here?

He dropped his wet bathrobe into the hamper and changed into dry clothes, making himself a cup of  tea and sipping it as he dug his first aid kit out of his cabinet.  Then, grabbing a fresh towel, he placed it on the couch where she’d been sitting, trying to soak up the water before she came out and noticed that she’d gotten it wet.  Sitting on a dry cushion, he checked his phone.  There were a few calls from restricted numbers but none from Kyoko apart from the one that had woken him.  So she hadn’t tried to contact him…why?  He would have picked her up if she’d needed him to.  

Kyoko emerged about twenty minutes later, swimming in the sweater and sleep shorts he’d left for her, but they were the only clothes he’d had that might even remotely fit her, which made him consider buying a couple of pairs of clothes in her size, just in case.  Then again, he’d have to think of an excuse for why he would own something like that…deciding to think about that later, he gestured for her to sit on one of the dry sections of the couch and opened the first aid kit.  She did, placing the nearly empty cup of tea onto a coaster on his coffee table.

“Not that I’m not always happy to see you, but can you tell me what brought you here at this hour?”

His attempt at a joke only made her lips twitch a little as he got a better look at the bruising on her shin.  There was a cut there, but it wasn’t too bad, so he opened an alcohol wipe and ran it over her leg. 

“I’m really sorry that I woke you up,” she whispered, and he waved her off.

“Don’t apologize.  You’re always welcome here.”

“I’ll pay you back…”

“You don’t have to pay me back.  I don’t care about the money.”

She swallowed hard, hands clenched in her lap.  “There...there was someone in my room.”  

Her half-whispered words made him freeze, the bandage he’d been pulling out of the little plastic box forgotten.  “What?”

She swallowed hard, trying to smile and failing miserably.  “I probably overreacted…”

“There was someone in your room?” he repeated softly, wanting to make sure he got every word.  “In your bedroom?”

She nodded, lips trembling.  “I...I woke up, and...and there was someone standing in the corner.  And...I...I screamed and...he was saying something but I was scared and I...I just grabbed my phone and ran.  He tried to grab me...but he tripped in the hallway and...and these were the only shoes by the door that I could get on fast enough.”  A tear ran down her cheek and he reached up, taking her now-warm hand in his own.  She didn’t pull away...just squeezed his hand and bit her lip.  “I probably should have listened to what he was saying…”

Ren was shaking his head before she could finish that sentence.  “No. You shouldn’t have.  You were right to run.  No one should be in your room at night.  Of course you were scared.”

She sniffed.  “Okami-san is still in the hospital and Taisho is staying with her...and…I thought I checked the door…”

Ren took her other hand and her stumbling explanation came to an abrupt halt.  “Okay.  We need to call the police.  And I’ll wrap your leg as best as I can, but you might want to see a doctor tomorrow if you’re having trouble walking. You fell outside?”

“I tripped on a curb...I was going to walk here but I saw a cab and..”

He placed a hand on her shoulder.  “I’m going to call Takarada-san, and then we can call the police.  We’ll need to call Yashiro too to let him know what’s going on, just in case the press finds out anything.”

“Okay.”  Kyoko nodded, not meeting his eyes, lips still trembling.  “I don’t know what’s happening...bad things keep happening….”  Looking up through her lashes, she lowered her voice to a whisper as if ashamed to admit it.  “I’m scared..”

“I know.  But it’s going to be okay.  You’re safe here.  I promise.”

“But I can’t stay here…”

“You can.  For a couple of days, if you need to.”

“I don’t understand how someone got in…I know I checked the door.  I did!  I promise!  I checked it!”

“I think they should change the locks.  But that’s a conversation for tomorrow.  Why don’t you lay down for a minute?”

“I don’t have any clothes or…or my bag and…and I need to be at work tomorrow at 8…”

“It’s okay,” he murmured, squeezing her shoulder.  “I’m going to call Takarada-san.”

She dropped her head into her hands, breath catching, and he sat beside her, wrapping an arm around her shoulders and feeling his heart clench.  

“You’re okay.  I promise.  You’re safe here.  It’s all going to be okay.”

In a move that nearly stunned him into silence, she turned and buried her face in his shoulder, one hand gripping his pajama shirt.  He leaned back against the sofa, arms around her, a hand rubbing her back, and wondered what the hell was going on.  She sobbed then, shoulders shaking, but he just kept rubbing her back.  “You’re alright,” he murmured.  “You’re safe.  I’ll keep you safe.”

He would try.  He would do everything he could.  But what if it wasn’t enough?  How could he protect her when she lived at the Darumaya?  When he was only with her on the rare occasion that their lunches lined up or he happened to have a similar start time?  He could pay for new locks at the Darumaya and hire security for outside the building at night, but even that didn’t feel like enough and he knew she wouldn’t like it.  Still, he needed to talk to Takarada-san.  So he waited for her breathing to even out, then eased out from under her, gently laying her down on the sofa and covering her with the blanket.  She barely stirred as he tiptoed to the wall and switched off the light, then went into the kitchen and dialed Lory.

“Boss?” he asked the moment he answered, and Lory must have been able to read his tone because the background music of whatever dating sim he’d been playing went silent.

“What’s going on?”

“Kyoko’s here.  There was someone in her room.  She got out of the Darumaya and took a cab.”  He kept his voice low, not wanting to wake her, but he wanted to scream.  Wanted to break something.  Wanted to spend the night in her room and catch whoever this was and throw them out a window for doing this to her.

“Did she see who it was?”

“No.  She said it was dark.  This has to be a stalker…one with a key to the Darumaya.”

“Unless someone didn’t lock up.”

“She said she checked the door, and with everything going on, I believe her.  Her landlord is at the hospital with his wife.  She was the only one in the building.  She would have checked all the doors.”

She’d been alone.  Anything could have happened.  Just the thought sent a shudder through him.  What if she hadn’t gotten out?  What if the man had caught her?  He wouldn’t have been able to protect her then.

“Has she called the police?”

“Not yet.”

“I’ll make the call and clear her schedule in the morning.”

He gave a dry chuckle.  “She won’t like that.”

“Too bad.  When she wakes up, I’ll have my driver pick her up.”

“I can bring her.”

“I don’t believe your schedule is clear tomorrow…”

“She needs to go to the Darumaya to get her clothes.  She’s wearing mine,” he hissed, like the press might be waiting in the other room to pounce on the story.  Besides, he wasn’t ready to be apart from her.  Not yet.  For the first time in his life as Ren, something else was more important to him than work.  Who cared about his career when Kyoko needed him?

Lory sighed on the other end.  “Alright.  Take her before the restaurant opens.  Go inside with her.  Then bring her right here.”

“Got it.”

“I’ll call Yashiro and let him know that he can pick her up here in the morning.”

“And what?  Take her back to the Darumaya?”

“I’ll come up with some Love Me work she can do here.  And I’ll make sure Yashiro stays with her.”

Ren wanted to be the one to stay with her.  He wanted to bring her back to his apartment.  Set up the guest room.  Let her move in because she would be safe here.  He’d drive her to work.  He’d stay with her until she felt safe.

But none of that was possible.  Not yet.

He set his alarm for 7, thought about waking Kyoko and moving her to the guest room and decided against it, then dropped into his own bed, leaving the door ajar just in case she needed anything.  But even with the lights out and the blankets pulled over him, he still couldn’t sleep…not when all he could think about was Kyoko alone in that restaurant.  Not when there was a man out there that had a key to her home.  Not when this night could have ended so differently.  

He got out of bed, not turning on any of the lights, and checked his phone again.  Sighing when all it told him was that his alarm was still set for 7, he left the bedroom and went to his front door, turning the knob a few times.  Still locked.  He was being stupid.  Of course the door was locked.  What next?  Was he going to go around checking the windows just in case this asshole could scale the building?  

On the sofa, Kyoko made a noise in her sleep, rolling over so she was lying on her back, lips pursed, brow furrowed, and he placed his phone on the coffee table, kneeling beside her.  

“Kyoko-san?”

She whimpered, shuddering and turning her face to the side.

“Kyoko-san?  It’s okay,” he murmured, resting a hesitant hand on her shoulder, and Kyoko went stiff, breath catching, eyes flying open.  “It’s me,” he told her softly, squeezing her arm.  “It’s Ren.  You’re okay.  You just fell asleep on the couch.  You’re okay.”

She let out a breath, lips trembling, and he brushed her hair back from her face.  

“I called Takarada-san.  Your schedule is clear tomorrow morning.  I’m going to take you to his office so you can talk with him.  He’s going to call the police.  Everything’s okay.”

Slowly, she nodded, closing her eyes again.  

“You’ve still got a couple of hours to sleep.  You want to move to the guest room?”

She shook her head, pressing her lips together in a tight line like she was holding something back.

“Okay…do you need anything?”

She shook her head again.

“Then I’ll let you get some sleep.”

“Will you stay?” she blurted, fingers catching his sleeve, and the second the words were out, she flinched like she hadn’t meant to say them.  But he was nodding before she could take it back.

“Of course.  I’ll sit right here until you fall asleep.”  He would, too.  Who cared if he didn’t get any sleep?  As long as she felt safe, he’d be right here.

“You can…you can lay down.  If you want,” she murmured, and despite the darkness, he could just imagine how pink her cheeks were.  How her eyes would refuse to meet his.  

But he couldn’t say no.  Not when he was so tired and she was right there, asking him to lay down with her.  To make her feel safe.  So he sat on the sofa, watching her scoot back, and laid down beside her, heart skipping a beat in his chest when she curled up beside him, a hand finding his shirt, fingers closing around the fabric.

“Get some sleep,” he urged, stroking her back once more and feeling like an asshole for being so happy about it when she was so upset.  “I’ll be right here.”

She did, closing her eyes again and falling asleep so quickly that he wondered if she’d ever been awake in the first place.  He didn’t stop stroking her back, though…didn’t stop rocking her just a little, the blanket wrapped around her like a cocoon, her nose pressed to his chest, head tucked under his chin, knees bent and making it nearly impossible for his legs to fit on the couch.  He’d never been more comfortable.  Closing his eyes, he listened to her soft, steady breathing and let himself fall into sleep too, dreaming of her lying in his arms until his phone woke him once more a couple of hours later.