Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

Another day at the headquarters… This was something that Timmy dreaded. Sure, saving the multiverse was fun and all, but every moment there meant more time lost to himself and his fairies. He wanted to get in every moment he had left with them to do personal wish stuff, and he wasn’t allowed to make wishes that were related to time anymore. Jorgen von Strangle, the head fairy, was still on his ass about inviting Frank Sinatra to his 18th birthday… But to be fair, that was Wanda’s request, so she took some heat for that too.

Anyways, long story short: Timmy knew he didn’t have all the time in the world anymore. He had things to keep him busy: personal training, socializing, and world-saving. And today, it was another world-saving day, just like it was yesterday. And the day before that…

Jimmy had pinged everyone a few days ago to come down to their headquarters for an emergency. No one knew what the big emergency was, but if it was big enough to catch Jimmy’s attention, it most likely wasn’t anything too good. The update so far was that the Syndicate had planted some kind of sleeper agent somewhere in the multiverse, a “catalyst” as Jimmy called it, and that catalyst was set to go off at any time, so they had to get a jump on finding it. Unfortunately, things had turned up pretty short over a 3-day span, and everyone was getting tired. Good thing they had sleeping arrangements at HQ…

On this third day, right around lunch time at the break room table, Spongebob had served up some culinary delights for his team. He was always a whiz in the kitchen, and thankfully it wasn’t restricted to just krabby patties. He had made some delicious seanut brittle pancakes with a jellyfish jelly drizzle, which were just the right amount of chewy and crunchy. Like biting into a soft pretzel with a glaze of strawberry-grape… or whatever flavor jellyfish jelly was supposed to be.

The only thing was that Timmy and Jimmy didn’t have much of an appetite. Jimmy was focused on finding the catalyst at the main computer, and Timmy was just despondent. It was something Manny took special notice of.

“Hey,” he said from across the table, “you alright, amigo ?”

“Eh, just bored, I guess,” Timmy replied. “We’ve been stuck here for 3 days while Jimmy’s been pulling all-nighters.”

“Aw, I’m sure we’ll hear something soon,” Spongebob chimed in, trying to stay optimistic. “The Syndicate couldn’t have hid the catalyst that well.”

“I dunno, Spongebob,” Danny argued. “They have a lot of geniuses on the top.”

“The same lot of geniuses we’ve put the smackdown on time and time again?” Timmy asked.

“Well, you heard what Jimmy said. Whoever it is is probably hiding in plain sight, somewhere we least expect them to be. There’s a lot that we could miss in plain sight.”

“Like your car keys,” Jenny chimed in. “My mom’s gone crazy over ‘losing her car keys’ so much when they’re literally right there on the table.”

“Whatever…” Timmy muttered. “If I had a say in it, I’d just punch in someone random.”

“Timmy, you know that wouldn’t work!” Spongebob exclaimed.

“Which is why I don’t have a say in it.”

“That’s not totally true,” Jenny said. “You just need to speak out every once in a while… Just in a more thought-out way than randomly picking someone and hoping for the best. After all, you’re good at being a voice of reason sometimes.”

That was something Timmy had been notorious for. Aside from pointing out the obvious, he was best known for challenging stuff and making people second-guess themselves. It’s actually helped a lot in clutch situations, but it could also get understandably annoying as well. Therefore, he was only really listened to when he needed to be heard, which really got on his nerves. That need to be heard could’ve done wonders in Clamburg…

Suddenly, the mundane chatter of lunch time was broken by a loud shout.

“MAIL CALL!!”

Scaring everyone and nearly making Manny choke to death, a girl with blonde hair and glasses burst into the room, a wide smile on her face. A white-collared yellow dress graced her form, and a brown ranger-type hat bobbled on her head. Around her shoulder, a sash laden with badges was on prominent display, sparkling with achievement. Around her other shoulder, a blue mailbag bounced around with her movements (almost nailing Spongebob in the head as she walked by).

Manny eventually stopped choking and coughed out the piece of pancake that got stuck in his throat. “ Madre de dios , Bessie!” he exclaimed. “I thought we told you to stop shouting like that when you come into a room!”

“Just wanted to let everyone know I was here, Mr. Rivera,” Bessie declared with a salute.

“Ugh… And another thing. It’s just ‘Manny’, alright? You get any more formal with me, chica , and I’m gonna start sounding like an old man.”

“Aww, lay off her, Manny,” Jenny giggled. “You know she’s just excited.”

Since joining the ranks of the Toons team as a lower rank hero, Bessie Higgenbottom had been more than adamant to help out in any way she could. The way she saw it, it was a step on the ladder to becoming her idol, the Mighty Bee, a superhero like these heroes were. In a span of 10 years, she had already collected every single badge that the Honeybee Troop #828 could offer, and was even considered a scout leader by the time she was 18, but she was still anxious to be more than that. She knew she was destined to help people through thick and thin, and if this was the way to do it, she would gladly follow through…

…Except that patrol job at Ocean Shores. She regretted being there when the riots broke out.

Bessie’s task this time around was collecting mail from everyone’s respective worlds and checking on their dwellings, since they’ve all been at HQ for longer than usual. Everyone trusted her with their keys since she seemed too naive and rule-following to abuse the privilege, and it panned out pretty well. Even Spongebob’s pet snail Gary was fed before she arrived. And she had a whole satchel of mail to prove her traveling around, which she emptied out one letter at a time and passed around to everyone with the speed and efficiency of a Las Vegas card dealer.

It was various all around: Some letters from Jenny’s mom, bills for Danny, Manny’s magazine subscription, a message in a bottle from Mr. Krabs…

…Oof, Spongebob was going to have a hard time reading that one. When he missed work, Mr. Krabs would often go straight over to his house just to cuss him out. And the angry letters were just as bad, especially in bottle form.

Timmy was the last one to get his mail, which was all just typical junk. All except for one pink envelope with pink writing on it. It was kind of hard to read… Curious, he opened the envelope to see what was inside.

Have you heard the news? Trixie Tang is having a pop-up party at her house! Don’t miss this once-in-a-lifetime opportunity tonight at 9PM! This letter is to notify you that the recipient:

Timmy Turner

Is officially NOT invited!

-Sincerely, Trixie Tang

The letter was practically dunked in pink paint, doused in glitter, and drowned in perfume. It was an assault on the senses, and it was exactly the kind of showy thing that made Timmy’s face curl into a frown, not just from the strong perfume smell. He scoffed and threw the letter into the center of the table, aiming to cast it away from himself.

“Why would you get rid of such a pretty-looking letter?” Spongebob asked.

“It’s just junk,” Timmy replied bluntly. “Reject letter from this party in my world.”

“Aww, that’s a shame… I bet it would’ve been fun!”

“Well, I wasn’t planning to go anyways, so…”

Everyone stopped dead in their tracks upon hearing that and looked at Timmy. Timmy nonchalantly returned to his pancakes before realizing everyone was looking at him.

“…What?”

“Dude,” Danny said, “you seem a little less distressed about not being invited to a party than I expected.”

“Yeah, you’re like the party guy!” Bessie chimed in. “At least, from what I’ve heard.”

“It’s Trixie Tang,” Timmy stated. “I couldn’t give less of a damn what that prissy princess is up to.”

Truth be told, there was a time when he would’ve cared. Once upon a time, he thought Trixie was the coolest girl in the world. She was very popular among her peers even back then, and everybody respected her even though she never returned such respect. She was essentially a queen among commoners in grade school. And Timmy loved it… Well, used to.

Eventually, some kind of switch flipped in his brain, and he saw her for what she truly was: shallow and dependent on everyone’s attention. In hindsight, he should’ve got that hint during a wish where he and Trixie were the only two people in existence for a bit, a wish that drove her berserk and exposed her true colors. She was never going to be into him no matter what, and he realized all his efforts had no point to them. Not if he was going to be stuck with someone like her… It’d make his life a veritable hell.

“But weren’t you just saying how bored you were?” Spongebob asked. “How much you wanted something to do?”

“Yeah, but I’m not that desperate,” Timmy replied, arms crossed. “The day I show up to one of her parties is the day I grow a mustache!”

“Aw, you wouldn’t look too bad with a mustache, Mr. Turner,” Bessie said. “Might at least help make those teeth a little less pronounced.”

To which Timmy responded with an unamused scowl. She was certainly one to talk with that heinous gap in her mouth where her front teeth used to be.

“…Don’t you have other things to do, Four-Eyes?” he asked.

Bessie thought for a moment before snapping her fingers. “The afternoon watch, you’re right! Thanks for reminding me!”

Without another word, Bessie rushed out of the room, nearly tripping over her own shoes barreling out of the doorway. Right after she left, the Cosmo and Wanda earrings on his ear jingled.

“Timmy,” Wanda said, “you don’t really mean all that, do you?”

“Sorry, Wanda, but I do,” Timmy replied, just as blunt as before.

“Even the part about the mustache?” Cosmo asked.

“ESPECIALLY the part about the mustache.”

Just then, the intercom rang out in the lunchroom, followed by Jimmy’s voice.

“Attention, everyone! I believe I’ve finally found the catalyst residing in Dimmsdale! Report to me immediately!”

Everyone sat in silence for a moment, looking at Timmy and awaiting his response. All he could do was let out a long sigh…

“…Guess I’ll stop shaving for a bit.”

At the main computer, everyone had gathered around Jimmy for him to explain the catalyst’s whereabouts. The screen showed a map of Dimmsdale top to bottom, various X’s and O’s drawn on with the O’s going in a trail somewhere towards the southeast.

“So,” Jimmy explained, “this is the approximate trail of a suspicious energy signature I picked up in Dimmsdale. It doesn’t appear to be completely natural, but a hybrid human-synthetic energy signature, suggesting an implant of some kind. Whether the suspect knows of this catalyst or not, I have no idea.”

“And you really think it’s in Dimmsdale?” Jenny asked.

“There’s no other energy signature in other worlds quite like this one. This one is atypical and unique, yet runs on a frequency that faintly resembles some of Plankton’s technology.”

“And we know Plankton’s capable of mind control,” Spongebob remarked. “I can count at least… three or four times.”

“But we don’t know who exactly it is?” Danny asked.

“Unfortunately not,” Jimmy answered. “This trail only shows roughly where they’ve gone over the last 12 hours, which means it could’ve been anyone going in that direction.”

“How do we know who the catalyst is gonna be?” Spongebob asked.

“The definition of a catalyst is something that precipitates an event; therefore, I suspect that the catalyst will most likely be at some kind of event happening in town. Anyone know anything that’s happening at Dimmsdale tonight?”

Everyone immediately turned to Timmy, who let out an annoyed groan.

“Timmy…” Spongebob assured.

“Fine…” Timmy grumbled. “…There’s a party going on tonight. Trixie Tang’s house. I guess that’d be some kind of event?”

“It might just be EXACTLY what we’re going for!” Jimmy exclaimed. “Any chance you could get into that party?”

“I could do that, but there’s just one problem: I don’t want to.”

“What?”

“Well, apart from not being invited, I don’t really like the hostess. And she REALLY doesn’t like me.”

“She sent him an invite just to tell him he’s not invited,” Spongebob added.

“…Not helping, Sponge…”

“Come on, Timmy,” Jimmy assured. “This isn’t a time to be despondent. If that catalyst goes off at that party, people could get hurt. And since it’s your world, you’ll know best how people operate and catch on to any abnormalities.”

“Do we even know what this catalyst is gonna do?”

“Well, no… But if Plankton designed it, it’s certainly not something with good intentions.”

“Well, maybe it won’t be as bad as we think! Can’t I just do it from the sidelines?”

Now, Jimmy was starting to get mad. “No, you can’t just do it from the sidelines! You’re going into that party even if you have to disguise yourself!”

“No! How many times can I make that clear?? I’m not going!”

Jimmy could’ve argued. He could’ve made a scene right then and there until Timmy eventually caved just to get him to shut up… But Jimmy was smarter than that. They didn’t have time to argue; they just had enough time to come up with a plan and put it into action. He knew he had to try something else.

“…Okay,” he said calmly. “You don’t want to do this, that’s fine. That’s perfectly fine. It’s not my fault that you’re a coward.”

A resounding “Ooh…” came from the rest of the group, while Timmy wheeled around and got in Jimmy’s face.

“Ex-CUSE me??” he snapped.

“You heard what I said,” Jimmy replied.

“What makes you think I’m afraid, huh?”

“Well, obviously you don’t want to confront Trixie because you’re scared of her.”

“Hah, yeah right! Like I’m scared of some girl!”

“Ohh, yes you are! You’re scared of everyone and everything.”

“You don’t think I could do this? I’ll show you how scared I am, Nerdtron! I’m going to that party at 9 on the dot, and I’ll even tell off that pink poser to her FACE if I have to!”

Jimmy turned back to the computer, nonchalant and smug. “Great, then it’s settled. Party’s at 9, we’ll leave at 8:30.”

…Then, Timmy’s brain finally caught up with him. “Wait, what just happened?”

“Dude, you just got hit with reverse psychology,” Danny chuckled. “You’re gonna crash Trixie’s party!”

Everyone shared a laugh at his misfortune, all while he just stood there, dumbfounded and aggravated with himself. If there was one thing he hated most above anything else… it was being outjerked.

Trixie Tang’s mansion was often the talk of the town, with its size and location being envied by many. And very few were ever lucky to even set foot inside, so being invited to a party at her place was certainly worth the bragging rights. Of course, with Trixie being basically a celebrity, certain safety precautions such as moderating the guest list, hiring bouncers and bodyguards, and a lack of anything related to drugs or alcohol, had to be considered.

Unfortunately, none of the plans had considered some rando with fairy godparents trying to break into the party. And said rando was hiding a couple of blocks away behind a bush with Jimmy, Spongebob, Danny, and Jenny on standby.

“Okay, let’s go over the plan,” Jimmy explained. “My quick scan definitely detected the catalyst’s energy signature coming from this party. All Timmy has to do is look for anything that might be out of the ordinary. Any odd behaviors, maybe a nervous twitch or someone constantly scratching something. And make sure to keep an eye on someone that we would least expect to lash out at the party.”

“Got it,” Timmy said, not entirely listening.

“If anything goes wrong, we’ll step in. I have a tranquilizer gun with me, so if the catalyst reveals themselves, we can quickly subdue them.”

“Sounds good.”

“…You didn’t hear a word, did you?”

“Nope.”

Jimmy let out a heavy sigh. “Okay…”

“Look, I know what I’m gonna do, alright? Go in, socialize, bring the catalyst guy outside, and get my ass outta here before Trixie ever finds out.”

“Aw, you’re not actually gonna yell at her?” Jenny asked teasingly.

“Hell no, I didn’t mean that. That was just my brain doing dumb brain things.”

“Like always…” Jimmy said under his breath.

“Watch it, Nerdtron.”

“Well, as long as you’re aware of what to do, there should be no reason to worry. Now, get in there while the bouncer’s being overwhelmed by the guests coming in.”

“Right, yeah… Yeah…”

But Timmy wasn’t moving. There was a very apparent apprehension, a bad feeling that told him he probably shouldn’t do this.

“Well, what are you waiting for?” Jimmy asked. “Get a move on!”

Timmy quietly swallowed a lump that was forming in his throat. “Alright… Here I go… Unless someone wants to take my place at the last minute—”

Effortlessly, everyone pushed the apprehensive hero out of the bush and onto the sidewalk, thankfully with no one watching.

“Ugh… Fine,” Timmy groaned, getting up and dusting himself off. “Cosmo, Wanda, I wish I had some kind of disguise. Something to make me blend in and look trendy.”

“Coming right up!” the Cosmo earring said, raising his wand.

And in a poof of magic dust, the disguise was set. A pair of slitted party sunglasses, some trendy blue clothes, a purple ball cap, and…

“A mustache? Really?” Timmy asked, unamused.

“A chevron mustache,” Cosmo said.

“At least Bessie was right,” Wanda added. “It does help take away from your teeth.”

All Timmy could do was grumble annoyedly. Aside from the tickle on his upper lip, he did NOT want to be associated with a mustache…

…Ah well. He could just wish it away later.

Besides, he had somewhere to be. He walked a couple blocks to his destination, stepping in line to get into the party. The wait was only 10 minutes, so thankfully it wasn’t too bad. The bouncer was of course a very big man, very strong and well-built to keep ne’er-do-wells out.

“Name, please?” he said.

That was the first hurdle. Luckily, they planned for this. Wanda quietly poofed away and turned into a fly to buzz about and read a random name off the list, which she would buzz over to Timmy’s ear and relay…

“Andrew Stenron,” Timmy answered, being as nonchalant as possible.

But instead of just letting him in without a problem, the bouncer said, “Nope. Nice try.”

“What?? C’mon, it’s me! Andrew!”

“No, you ain’t.”

“How do you know?”

“I’m his brother.”

…Oh. That was an unfortunate coincidence… Alright, time for Plan B.

“Look, I’m not gonna sugarcoat it, big guy,” Timmy said. “I’m kinda notorious for having a bunch of pseudonyms, and I don’t even remember my own name at this point. It’d just save us both a lotta trouble if you just let me in, no questions asked.”

“No way,” the bouncer said, cracking his knuckles. “You’re not getting into this party.”

Oh boy… He was blowing it. Time for Plan C.

Timmy waved his hand in front of the bouncer’s face, cueing in Cosmo to poof a mist of fairy magic into his face from Timmy’s jacket sleeve.

“I think you will let me into this party,” he said.

The bouncer looked confused, then dazed, then shook his head and looked content as Timmy lowered his hand. “Hey, yeah,” the bouncer said. “I think I will let you into this party. You seem like a trustworthy guy.”

And so, the bouncer motioned Timmy inside. As soon as he was out of sight of the big man, he pumped his fist in victory. He really didn’t expect the whole “Jedi mind trick” to work like it did in the movies. The only thing was that he would certainly get an earful for it later, whether it be from Wanda or Jorgen von Strangle, about the ethics of mind control.

But that could come later. Right now, there was work to be done, and shadows to be hidden in. If he was going to find this catalyst that could blow up at the party, he needed to be street smart and savvy, play it cool and hope no one bats an eye. Thankfully, there was some part of him that knew what being cool meant (which in this case was being very much not like his usual self).

And he would find this thin veil of coolness through the threshold and into the lion’s den. There was no turning back now…

Chapter Text

The party was starting to go into full swing already. Partygoers were chatting with each other, people were playing at the pool table (which Trixie had one despite never playing), there were some folks in the pool out back, there was even a couple making out shamelessly on a nearby couch. Truly, all the makings of a good party, even without beer to make it livelier.

And at the center of attention was who else but Trixie Tang herself, goddess among the common folk. Her rich and eccentric flair was especially apparent tonight, as she was decorated with multiple gold chains on her neck, glitter in her jet black hair, and fuzzy boots that complimented her bright pink blazer. She was seated at a large round chair laughing with her group of close cohorts, with her bodyguards Tad and Chad staying by both of her sides.

“Hahaha! I mean, she had the DORKIEST top I’ve ever seen!” Trixie laughed. “Like, girl, it’s not 2001 anymore! Hello?”

“Anyone with half a brain should know,” Chad said, “that a green crop top does NOT go with red jeans.”

“She almost sounds as bad as the ‘boots with no laces’ guy,” Tad added.

“Oh my god, I heard about him!” Trixie gasped. “Was that the weirdo with the mismatched socks?”

“And a garter strap!”

“Dude, shut up. That is SO cringe!”

As they all laughed amongst each other, blocking out the rest of the world around them, Timmy simply passed them by, not even offering them a passing glance. It took all his strength to not roll his eyes or deck one of those pretty bodyguards square in the jaw.

“Jimmy, I’m starting to regret this already,” he grumbled into his earpiece. “This catalyst can’t show their dumb face fast enough.”

“Just stay positive, Timmy. Remember, look for any abnormalities people may have. That’ll help us narrow it down.”

“Abnormalities, right… Well, there’s a guy who just puked into a bush outside. Does that say anything?”

“…Uhh… Most likely not?”

“Then I’ll keep lookin’.”

“Alright, good luck. And try not to get caught as an intruder.”

“Doing good so far…”

So Timmy turned off his radio and started looking around for anything strange. Nothing seemed too out of the ordinary, apart from the gaudy fashion statements some people came up with that clashed with everyone and everything around them. Don’t think a sleeper agent could influence that, though…

In an effort to find some place to start, Timmy decided to go get some punch. Part of the plan was to blend in and not look suspicious, and he was feeling thirsty anyways. He glanced around at some of the people around on his way over and did notice some subtle oddities. A slight jerking of the head, an itch on someone’s neck, some people not even socializing… To be fair, though, those ones were probably introverts that got dragged here outside of their own accord.

For the people that he thought were slightly suspicious, he ordered Cosmo to glance at their IDs and ask for Jimmy to do a pinpoint scan on specific persons.

“Alright, what about… Jack Delorean?” he asked into his earpiece.

After a few seconds… “Nope, doesn’t look like it. Must just be a normal itch.”

“And uh… Lyla Hindall?”

“No. Diagnosed with a double joint in her neck when she was born.”

“…Truman Schubacher?”

“Uh-uh. Says he’s not even supposed to be at this party. He must’ve snuck in and is trying not to act suspicious.”

“Well, it’s obviously not working for him. And I’m in the same boat.”

Eventually, Timmy made it to the drinks and snacks table and got some punch. There were choices of black cherry, grape, or pineapple lemonade… Alright, credit where it was due, Trixie had good taste in the drink department. There was, of course, also some water in case someone didn’t want punch, but Timmy lobbied for the black cherry. It was most likely his best bet to get him started.

But before he could even pour himself a glass, the sound of boisterous laughter came up right next to him. He would’ve ducked out if he didn't recognize the laughter almost immediately. He turned to see his friend, Chester McBadbat, dressed in a red varsity jacket and a Dimmsdale Devils hat. Ever since making it big in the major league baseball scene, it made sense that Trixie would invite one of the hometown jocks to her party. Still, being a friend of said jock who was at one point as bottom of the barrel as he was, it still hurt Timmy a little. Especially since he was in disguise, so Chester didn’t even know who he just ended up next to.

“Haha, oh man,” Chester chuckled. “That Mitch Lungson and his 8-Ball tricks… I tell ya, this party doesn’t get any better, doesn’t it?”

Realizing Chester was talking to him, Timmy turned to his friend, who was a whole 3 inches taller than him. “Oh! Uhh yeah, it’s… great.”

“And did you see what Trixie was wearing?” Chester whistled. “Seriously smokin’ tonight.”

Timmy forced himself to smile, gritting his teeth and straining his muscles that were desperately trying to frown. “Ohh yeah. She’s a… a looker…”

But Chester could sense something was off. The guy he walked up to didn’t seem to have the party vibe…

“Hey, you alright, man?” he asked.

“Yeah!” Timmy answered, a little too quickly. “Yep. Yep yep yep, never better.”

“Ya just seem a little on-edge… You wanna hang out with me and my pals for a bit?”

“Nahhh, I’m good. I just uh… Hey, what’s up with your neck?”

Incidentally, Chester had been scratching the back of his neck for a hot minute. It looked like it was getting on his nerves.

“Oh yeah, I dunno what happened,” he said. “I’ve been itchy there for the last few days. It’s like I got bit by something!”

Timmy’s eyes widened. Chester? One of the only people in his inner circle? It couldn’t be… Although, he had the strength now to break a few bones. He accidentally spiked a catcher’s knee on a home run slide one time. Ended the poor guy’s career…

“Yo, Chester!” someone called out. “Mitch is gonna start shooting over the shoulder!”

“You’re kiddin’!” Chester exclaimed. “This I gotta see… Later, dude.”

And that’s where Chester left Timmy, there at the punch bowl. Timmy was flabbergasted that something so terrible could happen to one of his friends… Luckily, if it were the case, it’d be handled quickly and painlessly.

“Hey, Jim?” he said into his earpiece. “Run a check on Chester McBadbat. He’s got an itch on his neck that he says was there for a few days.”

As Jimmy did so, inaudible murmurs could be heard from the other side. They all knew who Chester was; Timmy liked to brag about him a lot. The silence in waiting for the next few seconds was purely numbing…

“…Nope. Just a rash. Most likely sunburn or some allergic reaction.”

Timmy breathed out a long sigh of relief, as did everyone else on the other side.

“Thank god… I’m gonna try my luck on the second floor,” he said.

“Okay. Just keep your cool. We’re already a good part through the guest list. Shouldn’t be long now.”

Timmy disconnected again, making his way up the stairs past the droves of partygoers. It was a blessing that Chester wasn’t the catalyst… But then, that begged the important and obvious question: Who the hell was the catalyst?

Meanwhile, just a few blocks away, the other Toons were in place getting the read on everyone that Timmy suggested. Jimmy stayed on the line with Timmy, but the rest of them all disabled their earpieces so they could safely converse without clogging up the airwaves.

“I’m just saying,” Jenny said, “I think Bessie could take on any of us solo if she had the strength for it.”

“No way,” Danny argued.

“Well, why not? She’s smart as a whip! She can catch on to anybody’s weaknesses like nothing. Remember when we were investigating the mad cow incident in O-Town? I still can’t believe Bessie had the thought that it was a case of mutated salmonella.”

“Yeah, I guess… Well, hopefully, the Chokey Chicken learned something from that.”

Jenny turned over to Spongebob. “What do you think, Sponge?”

Spongebob was lost in thought before Jenny got his attention. “Huh?”

“You think Bessie could take you out if she was tough enough?”

“Uh, sure, I guess.” Then he went back to thinking.

“…That’s it? You usually have more of an input.”

“Sorry. I’m just… bothered.”

“Why? Do you think something’s up?” Danny asked.

“Maybe… I mean, think about it. Plankton’s energy signature has been popping up around a lot lately. Those robots from Royal Woods were his. There was a power shortage in Tremorton that he caused a few weeks ago. And now, he’s got a mind control switch inside someone here in Dimmsdale… Just makes me think he’s planning something big, like this is some kind of distraction so he can do something horrible.”

“You really think that’s what he’s up to?”

“Well… It is possible.”

Danny and Jenny thought about that for a second. It was indeed possible that this was all a big distraction effort so Plankton could get a head start on conquering some other world… Maybe it was a low possibility, but in retrospect, the odds were nowhere close to zero.

“…I’ll give Manny a call,” Jenny stated. “See if he can keep an eye out on the computer.”

“Wait, but what about the catalyst?” Danny asked. “If that thing goes off at the same time that Plankton’s doing damage somewhere else… We might be in some serious trouble.”

“What other choices do we have? Worst comes to worst, we’ll have to split and go halfsies anyways.”

“…I guess…”

“Let’s just hope for now that I might be wrong,” Spongebob chimed in. “M-Maybe I’m just worrying over nothing.”

“I dunno, Spongebob,” Jenny replied. “You know Plankton better than we do.”

That was true… Spongebob knew Plankton was a tyrannical warlord, but would he really stoop that low? To sidetrack his enemies so he could get the upper hand? He’s done it before, certainly, with the frozen face-off and the scandal of Neptune’s crown being prime examples. Yet, deep down, Plankton also had some kind of respect for his enemies, respect enough to not just buy the krabby patty secret formula from Mr. Krabs outright… But he has tried at least once.

Truth was, Spongebob didn’t know what to think, or what Plankton would dare try. But one thing was certain: He didn’t like how it made him feel, not one bit.

Back at the party, things were still coming up dry for Timmy. All the tips he gave left him no closer to the catalyst than when he started. Every scratch, every twitch, every odd hint of rage threatening to blow up… Nothing but mosquito bites, pinched nerves, and someone who really should’ve stuck with anger management.

Surely, they had to turn up at some point. Yet, even as Timmy made it up to the second floor and checked more and more people, that chance was turning up pretty slim. At this point, he was starting to make up random BS to clock on people just to see if the sleeper agent really was in plain sight and didn’t have any telltale signs.

After a few minutes of hopeless searching, things were starting to come up short. The Toons had gotten halfway through the guest list, and Timmy felt like they were no closer to catching the catalyst than when they started. It was making him antsy, especially since he knew Trixie could catch on to loser energy before too long. He was already here for the last half hour surveying people. At this point, it was a miracle that Trixie hadn’t managed to sniff him out and throw him out already.

On top of that, try as he may to mingle with people and act natural, his nervousness was easily noticed by the crowd, which did not help his chances of keeping a low profile. Any more of this acting suspicious, and someone’s going to complain straight to the top of the pyramid. Maybe he should wish himself invisible before it’s too late…

But before he could think too much about that, his mindless pacing around the second floor caused him to bump into someone. He would’ve spilled the punch he had in his hand if he had any left to drink from. The person he had bumped into stumbled to the floor, spilling their own drink all the while.

“Ah, sorry! Sorry about that,” Timmy stammered. “Here, lemme help you up.”

Timmy took their hand and helped them up off the floor. Now, he could’ve just booked it and left them to pick themselves up, but it was probably better to keep from looking like a jackass and drawing any more attention towards him. Plus, deep down, he had some kind of good nature to him.

…But as he realized who he just knocked himself into and helped back up, he regretted not running away.

The lady who stood before him, brushing the crumbs off her bright white dress skirt, was none other than Veronica Star, the second in command of Trixie’s inner circle. Her blonde ponytail swayed as she shook her head, and the multitude of fluorescent bracelets on her arms clinked together softly. Her pinkish-purple makeup was also somehow fluorescent, making her bright and chipper face light up even more. It was easy to tell she was one of the popular ones, but still lower rank to Trixie.

However, that also meant that Timmy was now standing in front of someone with a position of power who could very much identify him and rat him out. His body ran colder than ice as he took in that thought process.

He was, for lack of better word, fucked.

Chapter Text

“Ugh… Watch where you’re going, please! I don’t wanna stain my new dress.”

No response.

“…Helloooo?? I’m talking to you, weirdo!”

The snapping of Veronica’s fingers pulled Timmy back to clarity. What should he do? What should he say? Obviously, he can’t let her catch on that he’s a loser who shouldn’t even be here.

“U-Uhh, sorry,” he stammered. “Just got uh… caught off guard by your… blinding beauty.”

Veronica simply rolled her eyes. “Is that your lame idea of a pick-up line?”

“U-Uhh…”

“Listen, stache.” Now, Veronica was starting to get in Timmy’s face. “I don’t know where you get off pushing girls to the ground and trying to come on to them like that, but I’m not some cheap floozy you can just… Just…… Just who are you anyway?”

Incidentally, she was distracted by the odd glint in Timmy’s eyes, as if they seemed… vaguely familiar. Timmy could sense this, and he knew he had to think of something fast.

“W-Well… I’m just another popular guy,” he nonchalantly bragged, backing away slowly. “Y’know, doing… popular guy things. Sorry if that ticks you off, but hey, I was on the list and I have every right to be here.”

“Then what’s your name?” Veronica asked.

“…Andrew Stenron?”

Veronica simply laughed sarcastically. “Yeah, right! I’d recognize the bouncer’s brother anywhere, and you’re not him by a long shot.”

Damn it! Does everybody here know who Andrew is?? Getting caught like that twice in a row made Timmy start to sweat a little.

“You do look familiar, though…” Veronica continued, getting closer again.

“I-I-I don’t know what you mean,” Timmy stuttered.

“Like, those eyes… That shade of blue behind your glasses is so old-fashioned.”

“Aw, these old things… Th-They’re just color contacts! I mean, who wants to see boring old brown eyes on a guy like me, haha?”

As Timmy backed away from the ever persistent Veronica, a passing conga line was making its way through (because why not have a conga line if the house is big enough?). And as the conga line passed through, one of the partygoers pumped their fist right into Timmy’s head, causing his hat to fly off his head and reveal his hair. Although it was typically uncombed and unmanaged, it always stayed in a very recognizable shape. And although Timmy was quick to put his hat back on, Veronica still saw and recognized the hairstyle immediately.

She gasped. “Oh my god, you’re Timmy Turner!!”

Quick as he could, Timmy placed a hand over Veronica’s mouth and dragged her over to the nearest walk-in closet where they could talk alone. He was so infamous around town that it was practically a cardinal sin to bring his name up in conversation with the popular breed. He only hoped that no one was able to hear his name, otherwise it wouldn’t be long before everyone was at his throat.

It didn’t take him long to find the closest closet, which he slipped into with Veronica and locked the door. Knowing his cover was blown, he ditched the hat and slit shades to come clean.

“Alright alright, yes, it’s me,” he admitted. “I know I shouldn’t be here, but I am, and I can’t explain it, but I need to be here for your own good. What’s it gonna take for you to not rat me out? I-I’ll do anything you want.”

“Not rat you out? You know who you’re talking to, right?” Veronica asked.

“Yes, b-but I promise you, it’s a lot better if I stay. What do I have to do, polish your nails? Wash your clothes? Model dresses?” But then, Timmy caught himself. “Actually, scratch that last one.”

“Dude, relax. I’m not gonna blab.”

“…Y-You’re not?”

“Nah. To be honest, I’m glad someone like you showed up. Trixie invites the same popular posers EVERY YEAR, and it gets sooo boring when you’ve already talked to everyone. But you? You’re, like, someone I think I can actually talk to!”

Timmy was particularly dumbfounded. He didn’t expect Veronica to actually go along with it. Although… it was probably for the best. If it was any of the other hot shot hosts, he’d be dead on arrival.

“…W-Well, good,” he said. “Glad we could come to an… understanding.”

Veronica giggled. “But if you’re really willing to polish my nails, I wouldn’t mind.”

That made Timmy laugh a little as well. “I still can’t believe you found me out. Could’ve sworn my disguise was foolproof.”

“You almost fooled me. That mustache really takes away from your buck teeth.”

“Ugh, why does everyone keep saying that?”

Suddenly, the doorknob rattled, and somebody knocked on the door.

“Hey, is someone in there? Cover yourselves up, I gotta grab my coat!”

“…Maybe we should keep this going outside,” Timmy suggested.

So the two of them left the closet, to the attention of mostly no one. It made Timmy feel relieved that he could have someone to talk to normally, although there was still the lingering anxiety considering the someone in question. Not only one of the popular leaders of the party, but there was another side to Veronica.

Back then, she wasn’t exactly the most mentally sound. She often had moments of panic and lack of impulse control, aggressive fits of rage, a crippling separation anxiety, just to name a few. It had actually gotten so bad that when she was 16, she crashed a car into somebody’s house and threatened the homeowners with a soup ladle. The justice system put her in a mental hospital for 2 years after that, and she thankfully hadn’t had another bad incident since she got out.

Yet, there was still the potential for her to melt down somewhere deep in there, and that’s what scared Timmy. He heard about how they switched her on all kinds of pills for her anxiety, how she had to have constant counseling. Hell, if it wasn’t for Trixie still being her friend, she probably would’ve snapped several times. Her weird obsession with Trixie is quite possibly the only thing holding her together, funny enough.

Anyways, for the next few minutes, Timmy and Veronica got to talking about how their lives had been going for each other since they graduated high school. Timmy talked about how he’d been working out on the regular, how he had a budding career outside of town. It was about when they got back to the punch table that Veronica mentioned how she had gotten into college for a cosmetology degree.

“Get outta here!” Timmy exclaimed. “You, a cosmetologist?”

“Hey, it’s not that hard to believe!” Veronica replied. “I’ve been practicing haircuts on some wigs the last couple years. It’s actually, like, really therapeutic to cut something other than…” She chuckled nervously. “W-Well, it’s just therapeutic.”

That slight hint of more under the surface made Timmy wince a little. “…Riiight… Well, I’m glad it’s working out for you.”

“Oh, yeah… Have you ever thought about going to college?”

“Ehh, maybe later. I wanna give myself a break before I try to apply myself seriously.”

“Hehe, fair enough. That’s what I always liked about you, Timmy. You’re always so, like… Y’know, ‘go with the flow’. I wish I was more like that.”

“Well, you seem a lot better than you used to be.”

“Yeah, but I wouldn’t mind knowing what it’s like to be like you. Strong, funny, independent. You’re just, like… You sound so cool.”

“Hey, careful what you’re trying to say, Veronica,” Timmy said with a joking lilt to his voice. “I’m starting to think you might be into me.”

Veronica’s face flushed red as she giggled. “Actually… I’ve kinda always been into you. I would’ve told you a while ago, but… Well, you know we were from two different social classes. I’m just sorry you never really knew.”

Oh, he knew. He TOTALLY knew. He found out during another one of his wishes gone wrong, about 10 years ago…

“Do I think Timmy Turner is neat? Why, do you??”

One day, a threateningly romantic (or threatmantic, if you will) email was mistakenly sent to Trixie Tang. Since Cosmo and Wanda couldn’t wish it back on account of the true love clause in Da Rules, Timmy had to wish himself inside the internet to get it back and avoid being a laughingstock. And he was making good headway, as he had successfully gotten to the right sort of area and was bouncing around in a chatroom between Trixie and Veronica’s computers.

In order to properly get to Trixie’s computer from Veronica’s, he had to attach himself to a message and jump out on the other side. Now, he could’ve sent something she’d expect Veronica to say… But being as immature as he was, he decided to play around and ask if she thought he was a tall glass of water, for lack of better metaphor. That, in turn, left him in his morbid curiosity to bounce back to Veronica’s computer after Trixie asked from her side to see where this conversation could possibly go.

And Veronica had just gotten back to her computer when the message went through. “Do I think Timmy Turner is neat?” she repeated from Timmy’s forged message. As she was thinking, she instinctively smashed the Trixie doll she was holding onto the desk, as if the doll wasn’t badly damaged enough already from her jealous fit of rage. “…Actually, my love for him burns with the white hot intensity of a thousand suns, but I can’t let Trixie know that…”

Without a second thought, she tossed the Trixie doll aside and typed into her message box: “No way! He’s gross!”

But she had already unknowingly showed off her true colors to Timmy, who was watching from behind the message window. “Ohh, great,” he groaned. “The crazy one likes me!”

And she was still kind of crazy today. And still into him. Which did not bode well.

Still, he smiled through it and pretended it was new information. “Aww, no kidding?” he said. “Well, I’m… flattered, but I-I don’t really think I’m ready for something like that.”

“So it’s like… not ever?” Veronica asked, a slight sadness croaking her voice.

“More like not now. I just have a lot going on in my life, and—”

Suddenly, his earpiece started ringing in his ear, causing him to noticeably wince.

“A-Are you okay?” Veronica asked.

“Yeah, fine,” Timmy replied. “I just uhh… I gotta take a phone call real quick.”

As Timmy left, Veronica waved at him and stayed put. “Alright! Hurry back!” To which she followed up with the word “Please”, barely audible under her breath.

As soon as Timmy found his way to the bathroom, he locked the door closed and answered the anxious ringing in his ear.

“Timmy, we need an update,” Jimmy’s voice came through the receiver. “How’s it going?”

“Eh, little lax,” Timmy answered. “The music’s starting to get stale, and so’s the finger food—”

“Not the party, you nitwit! The mission!! Do you have any leads on our catalyst!?”

Ohh, right… That was the whole reason for being here.

“Alright, I’m not gonna lie,” Timmy answered. “It kinda slipped my mind.”

“What do you mean it slipped your mind??” Jimmy exclaimed.

“Look, man, something came up. I ran into an old uh… What’s it called when you know someone but they’re not a friend?”

“Acquaintance?”

“Yeah, that. Long story short, she’s kinda psycho, she knows who I am, and I’m afraid she’ll blow up and rat me out if I stay away from her for too long.”

“…You’re not talking about Veronica Star, are you?”

“Yes. Yes I am.”

“Oh, boy…”

“Aw, you’re in trouble, man,” Danny’s voice came through the receiver.

“I know!” Timmy exclaimed. “I-I don’t know what I’m supposed to do! I can’t just clone myself with this many people around.”

“Alright, let’s not panic,” Jimmy said. “We can salvage this… I have an idea. You still have your holograms on you, right?”

“Yeah, of course.”

“Well, the answer’s simple. Get them to do the manhunt for us. That way, they can find the catalyst, and you can keep Veronica in check.”

Timmy thought about that for a second… It did seem like the plan with the most sound logic. And admittedly, it was better than whatever half-baked scheme he could’ve come up with.

“Guess it’s worth a shot,” he said. “I’m on it!” He turned off his earpiece and turned to his other ear. “Cosmo, Wanda, you got all that, right?”

“Loud and clear, sport!” Wanda said, poofing alongside Cosmo out in the open of the bathroom. “We’ll keep an eye out for you.”

“Great. Now remember: Someone we’d least expect to be the catalyst.”

“Would that be myself included?” Cosmo asked.

“…N-No, Cosmo.”

“Okay… Yourself?”

“Cosmo!”

“Just checking.”

“Look. Just try to blend in, talk with people a bit, see what you can figure out.” Timmy took out his earpiece and handed it over to Wanda. “Wanda, you keep in touch with Jimmy. Keep him on the up and up.”

“What about you, Timmy?” Wanda asked. “How are we gonna keep track of you too?”

“Oh, right… Cosmo, you can keep in touch with me. I wish we had earpieces for each other.”

With a flick of his wand, Cosmo poofed up two separate earpieces, one for his ear and one for Timmy’s.

Timmy gave his fairies a thumbs-up. “Perfect! I don’t wanna jinx us too early, but I think we got this in the bag.”

“We’ll go ahead and dress ourselves up for the popular crowd,” Wanda said. “You get back to Veronica ASAP.”

And so, the three of them split up, with Timmy wading through the crowds to get back to the punch table to find Veronica. He knew Cosmo and Wanda would be competent enough to help him with his work… Well, Wanda anyways. Cosmo could be pretty useful too, but usually in a pinch.

Anyway, enough about them. Timmy was sure they’d be fine. His job now was to relocate Veronica and make sure that she kept her cool so his cover didn’t get blown.

Unfortunately, as he approached the drink table and noticed that Veronica was nowhere to be found, he realized how difficult that was about to be.