Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

They were posted up at a bar, shitty and dreary as most are. Dimmed lights (an attempt to be moody), a bard playing quiet Zemnian folk music in the corner, and drinks flowing throughout the bar and, more importantly, throughout the table containing the Mighty Nein. 

They had been relaxing here for several hours now, celebrating a recent victory out in the rural cities around Rexxentrum, tracking down a crew of bandits that had stolen a priceless artifact, and Dairon had asked them to retrieve it. 

An easy job, but still a success worth celebrating.

But yes, several hours they had been here drinking. Several plates of food and several rounds of drinks had been emptied and scattered through the table, flush high on the cheeks of the less tolerant members of the Nein, largely consisted of Caleb, Fjord, and Beau. The more tolerant members (Mollymauk and Yasha, who would drink their old circus crew dry; and Veth) were mildly tipsy, more entertained watching over the flushed members. Jester and Caduceus, who didn’t drink alcohol, were untouched and being…themselves. Which is to say that Jester was giggling and messing with Fjord, and Caduceus mildly sipped his tea. 

“Molly,” Yasha drawled, tossing a gold piece in front of him, “go get us more drinks.”

Mollymauk frowned, sinking into his particularly uncomfortable seat. “Do I haveta?”

Yasha met Molly’s crimson eyes with a lighthearted glare. “You can hold more than me,” she states, shoving his shoulder to get him to stand up. 

With a groan, Mollymauk scoops the gold piece off the table, standing to approach the bar, he can hear Jester pestering Yasha about what that means, with Beau joining in a moment later. 

Molly sidles up to the counter, sliding the gold piece to the bartender when they get to him, “three more ales…and a milk.”

The bartender doesn’t even blink at the milk, as Jester had quickly established herself when they walked in here several hours ago. And soon enough, there are three glasses of ale and a milk presented to him. And while he could precariously hold the ale in one hand and the milk in another, or use his arm to press the drinks against his chest...

Mollymauk was a performer at heart, and he knew the entire group was pestering Yasha by now, save for Caduceus. 

Molly’s tail rises without a thought, going for the handholds of one of the ales. Mindlessly, he grabs the milk in one hand, two ales in another, and holds the last with his tail, turning to approach the table. 

He’s met with eyes from the motley crew as he saunters over, watching as Yasha rolls her eyes while two very drunk humans stare in awe. 

As soon as the tail-drink gets set on the table, Beau goes to grab the appendage, Molly whipping it out of her hands before she can close them.

“Nuh uh, bad Beau!” He exclaims with a frown, “Tails are sensitive.”

Beau responds by frowning, but puts her hands in her lap. Meanwhile, Caleb looks ready to burst.

“You have questions, Mister?” Molly asks, tail whipping as he sets down the rest of the drinks in front of Veth, Yasha, and Jester. 

As Molly slumps into his seat, Caleb starts grilling him with an impossible amount of questions. “How strong is your tail? Like, how much can you carry? And for how long? Could you carry a bag on your tail? Does carrying stuff make your tail sore? Are there bones in your tail? Can you sprain your tail? Can a wound on your tail bleed? If so, can it get infected? What happens if it gets infected? What-”

“Slow down,” Molly cuts in, “take a breath.” After a moment, making sure Caleb was actually breathing, Molly tries to remember the questions. “I can and have sprained my tail before because I can only carry like 5 pounds. If I frequently carry stuff with my tail, it does get sore so I don’t carry bags on my tail, and also I wouldn’t be able to carry much.” Molly hums, trying to remember at least one more question. “My tail can bleed and can get infected, if that happens and I don’t treat it early enough I risk losing my tail-”

Now it’s Caleb’s turn to cut in, “you can’t lose your tail.”

Molly blinks, a confused furrow in his brow (though still thoroughly entertained). “Well, I can.”

“No,” Caleb asserts, “you can’t. That’d be sad.”

“You sound like Jester.”

“I like Jester,” Caleb pivots, “she’s nice.”

“Oooooookay, I think you need to go to bed,” Molly says, standing up and pulling Caleb up afterward. 

“Nooooooo, are there bones in your tail?”

“Yes, Caleb. My tail is kinda an extension of my spine,” Molly answers with a laugh. 

As they walked toward the stairs, Caleb frowned at Molly, draped over the tiefling’s shoulder. “I wanna hold it.”

“It’s sensitive, I just yelled at Beau for that.”

Caleb deepened his frown, making full-blown puppy eyes at Molly. Molly let out a breath, flicking his tail up to touch Caleb’s hand, graced with Caleb’s excitement and gentle, curious hands on his tail. For a drunk man, the wizard was shockingly cautious to not pull or explore past the tip of the tail.

Eventually, they reached the stairs, and Mollymauk had to do most of the work to get Caleb to walk up them, but he managed. By the time they made it to Caleb’s door, the wizard was putting the spade tip of Molly’s tail up to his own cheek, practically purring…despite the fact that humans can’t purr. 

“Goodnight Caleb,” Molly says, taking his tail back and gently shoving Caleb into his room. 

Chapter Text

Several months later, the Nein would find themselves posted in the Lavish Chateau, watching one of the Ruby of the Sea’s shows. As always, Marion was stunning, her skin cherry red and eyes golden, eyelids coated in black eyeshadow with matching black lipstick, giving her eyes and skin an alluring pop.

From the moment the Mighty Nein entered the Chateau, Jester’s tail had been going nuts. Everytime they walked into her childhood home, her tail showed her excitement, constantly waving and happily twitching until they left the establishment. And the moment they walked out, her tail would go still, save for the twitches and waves as she casually felt throughout the day. 

It had been months since Jester saw her mother, giving Marion and Bluud big hugs on the way in and bursting into her room to jump on her bed, tail waving and twitching in delight. So when they were invited downstairs for a performance, Jester couldn’t contain her excitement. And of course, Marion reciprocated, intertwining her tail with her daughter’s as they both wagged together. 

They’re like a cat’s, Beau realized, grinning at the picture of a small blue cat constantly mewing (in leau of her constant talking). 

So it was no surprise that Jester’s tail stayed gently waving around through the performance, twitching as her mother’s voice lilted and dropped, her voice echoing off walls and into the ears of the impassioned audience.

They stayed the night in the Chateau, rooms set aside for the collective group, though Jester went and stayed the night with her momma like she did when she was younger. 

The next morning, Jester would not stop talking, tail endearingly out-of-control. She needed to talk about the stories her momma told her and how she missed her momma and all the people that her momma had met, and yada yada yada. It was sweet. 

Eventually, the Mighty Nein did have to leave, setting off to Zadash to go ask the Gentleman (Jester’s papa!!) for some leads on a minor mission. 

It takes them longer to leave the Chateau, feeling Jester’s misery like a blanket over the whole group. Dragging feet, heavy sighs through lunch, and–worst of all–tail dragging on the floor.

Yasha had to dance out of the way to avoid stepping on her tail on the way down to the diner, Beau sat on her tail during breakfast (causing a loud shout from Jester, and an even bigger pout while she cradled her tail), and even when Fjord ordered her favorite food from her childhood, she only got more pouty; slouching in her seat, tail curling up to her chest as she sunk underneath the table. 

Soon enough, after a stifling lunch, the Nein were packed up and ready to go, bags slung over their backs with their newly purchased wagon waiting at a stable in town. 

On their way out of the tavern, Marion Lavorre came to see them off, giving her daughter a tight hug. “Come back soon, darling.”

Jester sighed miserably into her mother’s fluffy pink robe, putting her full weight onto her mother. 

Marion frowned, pushing Jester’s hair away from her head and kissing her forehead. “It does you no good to pout, hun. Pick your tail up, they need you.”

Jester sighs heavily once more, but picks up her tail to the relief of the group. 

Soon enough, they’ve stocked up on food for the trip, and are loading their supplies and themselves into the cart. Jester doesn’t drag her tail throughout the preparation to leave town, taking her fair share of work and spending more than anyone else in the group on food stores. She put on her brightest smile and upped the pep in her step.

But her expressions of excitement couldn’t beat the unconscious expression from her tail. Though it wasn’t dragging, there were times it would drop concerningly close to the ground, before she realized it was at risk of getting in the way, causing her to pick it up again.

Before long, they’re heading out of town, Fjord driving the horses while Yasha and Beau trailed beside the cart, everyone else riding the wagon out of town.

Jester stared out of the cart as they departed Nicodranas, tail flickering in her hands while she fidgeted with it. 

“I’ve been meaning to ask,” Veth started, “Molly seems to be able to control his tail like an extra limb, but they also move on their own. Do you feel when your tail is doing the…” Veth finished the sentence my miming the tail flickering.

“Well,” Jester started slowly. “It’s…sorta like when you make a face at something gross. Like, your face does the thing and you can feel it happening, but you don’t really make it do the thing. But you can also control what your face does. Does that make sense?” 

Veth’s face scrunched up in mild confusion, before seeming to understand what was being said through the action itself. “Huh, I guess so, actually. Cool.”

Chapter Text

The thing about having a tail is that its movements are largely unconscious. Jester had previously explained it to the likeness of facial expressions, having conscious control if you paid attention to it, but only then. 

So yes, Caduceus’ tail would sway during the day. It was strikingly similar to a cattle’s tail, swishing throughout the day and only giving any major movement when annoyed. Nothing like the tieflings’ tails, which swung around lazily throughout the day, or acted like a cat’s when experiencing any strong emotions.

Caduceus wasn’t surprised that his friends forgot he had a tail, what with its tendency to be still. 

That was, until they visited Caduceus’ family back at the Blooming Grove. 

The whole time the Mighty Nein were in the Grove, visiting Caduceus’ home, his tail was swishing around like a cow’s does. With all the talk of tails lately, it was hard not to notice, and Caduceus definitely noticed the renewed attention on him.

Luckily, they managed to behave in front of the rest of the Clay family, saving their burning curiosity until it was just the Nein together. 

The Mighty Nein decided to camp out beneath the stars, the night just clear enough for them to do so and feeling safe enough in the Grove to see no reason not to. In no time at all, Caleb was sparking a campfire while Fjord, Beau, Molly, and Yasha were setting up tents, while Jester and Veth elbowed each other by the soon-to-be fire, supposedly at some joke. Caduceus, meanwhile, had laid all his different herbs out on his cloak, checking for freshness and whatnot. 

The activity was…relaxing. After a long day of dealing with prodding questions from his biological family and the chaos from his chosen family. His mother, specifically, had been demanding to know if he was eating enough, praying enough, sleeping enough, drinking enough, laughing enough…all the things a mother worries about. 

He’s not even aware that Jesters calling his name until, suddenly, his vision is full of blue tiefling waving her hands in front of his face, “Exandria to Caduceus?”

Caduceus shakes himself aware, ears flopping into his face as he does so. “Sorry, did you want something?”

Jester stands up straight, hands on her hips. “I thought you dozed off cuz your tail stopped going.”

Caduceus chuckled, suddenly aware of all the attention turning to him from the rest of the group. “No Jester, my tail just stills when I’m…focused.”

This explanation, clearly, doesn’t satisfy the girl. “Well yeah, mine does too, but your tail is always still. Well, not always, but all the time!”

Caduceus tilts his head, brow furrowing in confusion. “I guess, my tail just doesn’t move as much as yours? Your tails are more dexterous,” he provides, gesturing to Jester and Mollymauk. 

“I think what she means,” Fjord pipes up, “is that we do see your tail moving around throughout the day, but there are times where it just…stops.”

Caduceus hums, suddenly understanding the situation better. “Well…I’m in my head more than you are.”

“Oh, like Caleb!” Jester exclaims, receiving nothing more than a glare from the man.

“A bit,” Caduceus responds, “I think you guys heard last time we were here, but I was doing…certain plants before y’all came around. Those plants made me more relaxed and, I don’t know, I guess the ability to separate has stayed with me.”

“So you’re getting high?” Mollymauk asks, abandoning the tent he was setting up to prod with Jester.

Caduceus sighed, ever patient, “I did not say that. I’m saying that it’s easy for me to…disassociate, I guess. Calming, too.”

Caleb and Yasha nod their heads in understanding, because of course they understand. Jester doesn’t seem to, her eyebrows still stuck in a furrow as if working out a complicated math equation, but she doesn’t say any more on the matter as Caduceus turns back to his work. 

The days following the discovery are entertaining, filled with Jester and Veth trying to catch Caduceus’ attention while also trying not to. It seems to be a game of chicken, from the sounds of it, trying to see who can get him closest to snapping out of his head without actually breaking his reverie. More often than not, Veth wins, having the most experience with Caleb and how he used to be “out of it,” as he had explained once.

All in all, some harmless fun, and maybe he makes sure his tail is neatly groomed in the days that follow.

Chapter Text

To say the Mighty Nein are stressed would be an understatement. 

With politics constantly bearing down on them, it felt like there was no reprieve. They were constantly being watched or targetted, or at best, being sought out for political advice. There was no end, no matter where they went or who they talked to or who they took jobs from.

The Gentleman had work, and because he was paying handsomely (and was Jester’s father) they took the job. Of course, getting involved with that one job wasn’t enough, as there was a mile-long list of hidden misdeeds this fucker had accomplished that needed to get to the Cobalt Soul, which was stressing out Beau and, in turn, Yasha. And because Yasha was stressed, Molly was stressed, and because everyone else was stressed, Jester was stressed. Without Jester’s enthusiasm, the group was tense, quiet…everything sucked. 

They sat down for dinner one night, as tense an affair as if they had walked into the Bright Queen’s halls again. No one said a word, the only sound coming from the dining hall of Caleb’s tower being the scraping of silverware against plates and stijns of ale hitting the table.

Caleb was losing face, Veth could tell. 

He was the first one to leave the table, rushing off to Light-knows-where. 

The rest of the group stayed, continued eating their dinner. Just a few minutes after Caleb left the room, Frumpkin made himself known again, blue eyes scanning the group before huffing out his own frustration.

The feline jumped onto the table, very purposely stealing some food off Beau’s plate and scarfing it down with a triumphant tail wave before the monk gets a chance to retaliate.

Fjord nudged her in the side, a mirthful look on his face, “heh, Frumpkin’s faster than you.”

Beau’s eyebrow jumped, unimpressed. “Wanna bet?”

This was enough to get Jester out of her stupor, slamming her hands on the table and standing up. “You guys should play cat and mouse! You know, you try to catch Frumpy while he runs around.”

Beau turned her gaze to Jester with an apologetic smile, “Sorry Jessie, but I don’t think that’d be any good. I’m way faster than Frumpkin.”

“Prove it.”

That was all Frumpkin needed to hear, tail thrashing as he ran out of the dining room and into the main hall. Beau followed just a moment later, that familiar gleam in her eye she got when promised a fight against a powerful foe. Except there was no monster this time, just a silly cat to chase. 

Unfortunately, Beauregard was right, as she caught the cat less than a minute after the chase started. Despite this, her spirits were already lifted, and Frumpkin even seemed to enjoy the run around given the satistisfied weave of his tail. 

With Beau’s mood lifting, so too did everyone else’s. She brought Frumpkin back to the table, where he received as much attention and food as he had been vying for, smacking his tail in Beau and Molly’s faces periodically just to be smart with them. 

With grins lighting up everyone’s faces, Veth sat back, resuming her eating. “Man, I wish Caleb was down here. He would have teased you to the Nine Hells and back, Beau.”

Beau sighed, though she seemed to agree, “yeah, he seems the tensest out of all of us…sorry if I’ve been bringing the mood down, guys. We’ve been through worse, I’ve just been sulking at the loss of peace.”

To this, the monk gets a comforting forehead kiss from Yasha and a muttered “It’s alright” from Fjord. Even Frumpkin joins in, licking her fingers as she extends them to pet the cat. 

After a few more minutes of lighthearted conversation and petting Frumpkin, the cat sighs. The Bengal jumps into the seat Caleb had left and transforms into the very human.

“Sorry for the trickery,” he manages, before being tackled by Beauregard.

“Wait! Caleb technically has a tail, then!”

All eyes turn to Jester at her statement, but she refuses to shrink.

“Four of us have tails!”

Caleb furrows his brow, “Nein, that is not really my tail. It is Frumpkin’s.”

“But you were Frumpkin,” Jester says. “And you had the tail. Therefore, you have a tail.”

Beau chimes in with “well, he doesn’t have a tail right now, so does that really count?”

“How about,” Fjord interrupts, before a fight can descend. “How about we say three and a half of us have tails. Since Caleb can be Frumpkin but isn’t usually.”

Jester narrows her eyes, before nodding. “Fine. Three and a half of us have tails!”