Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

The morning air was seeping through Jason’s cardigan and nipping at his skin as the library came into view. He didn’t mind though, savoring the promise of fall as he sipped on his coffee from the local spot he stopped at every morning before work.

It was overcast today with sporadic bouts of rain predicted which meant there was a 50/50 chance the library would be busy. When the weather was like this, he could count on the usuals to come in. The older folks who attended programming or arranged their own groups that took up some of the meeting rooms. The kids who came by after school let out and weren’t quite ready to return home. Parents with their younger kids trying to find more ways to entertain them whether it be books or movies. Anyone else was up in the air. Some more content to stay in the comfort of their homes than wander the stacks.

Swiping his card to get into the building, he went through his normal routine. Clock in, stop at his desk and drop his bag, grab his name tag, check his emails, and then go check where he would be stationed throughout the day once they opened in an hour.

Typically, he was in the teen section for the majority of the day (his official title was Teen Services Librarian after all) working on programming, putting together book recommendations and displays, and talking with the teens as they came in. Add some shelving into the mix (he liked putting an audiobook on and the monotony of the task) and those were Jason’s favorite shifts.

Hopefully today would be one of those. Something nice and simple that allowed him to go through the motions without too much thinking.

On his way to check the assignments because yes they did have a paper sheet instead of digitalizing it like Jason had suggested (He was close to making a breakthrough there though.), he ran into Madison, another one of the librarians who had become his friend less by choice and more by her wearing him down over the years. It was relatively easy especially since her desk was right by his.

“Good mornin’, Jay,” she greeted him with a smile, her own bigger, more caffeinated coffee (Seriously, how did one drink something with five shots of espresso and like it?) from the same local shop in hand.

“Mornin’, Madi,” he replied.

“I’m taking bets, busy or slow today?”

Jason smiled slightly at her antics. “I’m not partaking because that’s just going to jinx it and you know it.”

“You’re no fun today.” She rolled her eyes and grabbed the clipboard from its designated hook. She grimaced slightly as she looked it over. “And you’re about to be even less fun.”

He winced and took the clipboard from her. He slowly ran his finger down looking for his name and then over to see his assignments for the day. Surely it couldn’t be that bad right? Well…

Jason loved his job. He really did. Except for days like this.

Being short staffed had its disadvantages to begin with, every librarian knew that. One of which meant that he sometimes drew the short stick. Which was the case today as he saw Children’s scrawled next to his name for the late afternoon.

“Maybe it won’t be busy?” Madi tried, but it was no use. His mood had already deflated.

He raised an eyebrow at her. “Children’s won’t be busy on an overcast, possibly rainy day when school gets out?”

That was when it would be busiest and most chaotic. Parents trying to find ways to get the kids out of the house after school and get some energy out for free. With parks out of the picture, the library was usually their next thought.

He could already feel a headache forming just thinking about it. Could hear the echo of children screaming and running while their parents scolded them in hushed tones as they chased after them in his brain. He’d manage though. He just needed to sit at the desk and make sure that no major incidents occurred. He could handle that.

“Not to make it worse, but there’s that one program that shall not be named happening today during your time.” She at least had the decency to look like she felt bad about it.

“Shit.”

Oh, these kids were in for disappointment. Why couldn’t it have been reading to dogs or a book club or literally anything except for a story time. Jason could make it through anything else.

“Do I have any favors I can call in?” He asked hoping for an out.

Madi shook her head with another sympathetic look. “I wish I could help you out but I’m in charge of that crafting club at the same time.”

He groaned, but relented. That was right, it’d been her passion project she finally got the go ahead for after months of planning and garnering support from patrons.

Looks like he was on his own. He could survive one story time, right?

~

It’s not that Jason hates kids. He doesn’t. He gets along with them pretty well actually all things considered. But the problem with the younger ones is that their curiosity is overflowing and they are vocal about it without shame or the knowledge that some things are best left unsaid. That skill comes with age and practice.

Worse, the younger they are the less of a filter they have which means there’s a high ratio of thoughts that pop into their heads to those that come out of their mouths. It’s as though their curiosity brims over and needs to exit their bodies to make room for the new observations and the quickest way to expel them is to voice them.

He’d made the unfortunate mistake of having the sleeves of his cardigan rolled up to his elbows when he walked over to the reading spot with the book for the day. It had taken only a few minutes for one of the kids to notice the scars on his arms and make comment. Only a few seconds after that for him to hastily roll down his sleeves despite him being warm thanks to the heat being cranked just a tad too high. And even less time for his mood to fall, face flushing slightly in embarrassment as he tried to ignore the looks and whispers from the parents hovering nearby, but still manage to school his expression so as to make it seem like the question wasn’t a big deal.

How do you explain those to a six year old who has a minimal concept of the world and life? You don’t. You laugh it off, come up with some vague excuse or reason that won’t lead to more questions, and change the subject as quickly as possible. Luckily, it was story time and Jason opened the book and began to read.

~

After story time was over, Jason retreated to the children’s desk once again, avoiding eye contact with all of the parents that had witnessed the interaction at the beginning and busied himself with curating some lists of books to grab for one of his upcoming displays.

It was after things like that he really missed being in the teen room interacting with the middle school and high schoolers he’s gotten to know over the years helping them with homework, finding books they’d be interested in, and being a listening ear. He was considered the “cool” teen services librarian by most of them (which he definitely bragged about to his brothers even if they lovingly called him a nerd for it).

“Excuse me, can you help me find a book?”

Jason almost jumped, not hearing anyone come up to the desk at all. It was rare for one of the kids to approach the desk, especially on their own and with such confidence. Usually it was a parent coming up. If their kid was with them, they’d usually prompt them to ask him their question, usually something along the lines of whether they currently had a book. If it was just them, usually they’d ask for quick recommendations on what they should pick up for their child to read (always a more loaded question than they realized) or for a specific book on their kid’s behalf rather than making them ask themselves.

But now a girl stood in front of him, probably about 8 or 9 years old if he had to guess, looking at him expectantly. He’d noticed her tucked off into a corner (A good one if you asked, Jason. A corner he probably would’ve tucked himself into when he was younger filled with bean bag chairs.) reading while he did story time.

“Yes, of course, what are you looking for?” He switched to a new tab and opened the catalog.

“The Magic Tree House series.”

“Oh, good choice,” he told her as he typed it into the computer and watched as the results filled the page. Geez, he forgot how many titles were in this series. “Any specific one that you’re looking for?” She shook her head.

He was at the point he wanted to stretch his legs again and it wasn’t that far away from the desk anyway. He quickly put a sign out saying he’d be back in a moment and started to lead her to the section. “Alright, let me show you where they are.”

Walking over he read along the spines, his finger hovering to help keep his spot until he finally locked eyes on the series. “Looks like we have quite a few of them currently available,” he noted, gesturing to the stocked shelf.

Her eyes lit up like she’d just hit the jackpot, before she shot him a skeptical look.“Have you read them?”

It felt kind of like a challenge. Are you cool enough to know about the Magic Tree House? “Of course I have,” he replied as if it was the only right answer. It had been one of his favorite series as a kid actually. He’d constantly had those books checked out from his local library. He scanned the shelf finally landing on one of his favorites and pulling it out. “This is decidedly the best one.”

Her face once again lit up. “This one’s my favorite too!” This was followed by a full rant about why it was decidedly the best book in the series which Jason couldn’t help but smile at. These kind of interactions made his day. She excitedly grabbed the next three books she needed to read in the series as she quizzed Jason on some of her other favorite series, some of which he’d read, but others he hadn’t and promised to look into.

“Lian, you find what you were looking for?” A voice spoke up behind them.

Jason turned around and was greeted by a man a few inches shorter than him with auburn hair that brushed his shoulders under a trucker hat that had a logo for “Harper Automotives” on it. He had a few books of his own in his arms. Mostly nonfiction Jason noticed though there was also a fiction book that he didn’t recognize but made a note to look up. His green eyes crinkled as he smiled down at the girl standing next to him.

“Dad! Look at all the Magic Tree House books they have,” she excitedly pointed to the shelves and then going up to him and showing off the ones she pulled. “The librarian helped me find them,” she added as an after thought smiling back at Jason. “He’s read the Magic Tree House books.”

“Well thank you, Mr. Librarian,” the man said to him, his smile now directed at Jason. Was that a teasing lilt he heard in his voice? “She hasn’t been able to stop talking about needing to come here and get the next books since she finished the latest one she checked out last night.” He chuckled and she rolled her eyes at him, already cracking open the book on the top of her pile.

“It was no problem really,” he replied. Was it hotter in here all of a sudden? His face felt flushed.

“I’m Roy by the way,” the man said sticking out his hand. “This is Lian.” He nodded toward his daughter.

“Jason,” he replied, shaking it and giving him a small smile. Yeah, they had to have turned up the heat even further in this building. Jason would need to talk to someone about that.

“Well, thanks again for helping her out. I’ll probably see you around,” Roy said returning the smile. It was such a nice smile. “I’ve got quite the voracious reader on my hands so we’re sure to be pretty frequent visitors.”

“Bye, Jason!” Lian called over her shoulder, still with one of the books open in her hands as her as her dad, Roy, led her to the self checkout area.

“Bye, Lian,” he replied with a little wave.

Jason watched them carefully check out their books, Lian immediately picking up the book she’d started and resuming reading (which was exactly what he had done when he was a kid), before turning around and—

“Wow, that guy was totally eye fucking you just now. And with his daughter present.” Madi let out a low whistle. “That’s bold.”

He jumped. “Geez, I need to get you a bell, Mads.”

“It’s true.” She shrugged, leaning on the cart that she had with her filled with books to be shelved. “And you say that to me all the time. It’s never gonna happen. I enjoy my stealth too much. Also, in my defense, I wasn’t even that quiet this time.” She pushed the cart slightly for emphasis and its wheels rattled ever so slightly. Huh, how had he not heard that approaching? “You were just so smitten with him you didn’t notice me.”

“I was not ‘smitten’!” He hissed, putting air quotes around the offending accusation. No, he wasn’t. He wasn’t. Also who said “smitten” anymore?

“Mhm,” she teased as she walked away, cart rattling once again (seriously, how had he not heard that). Jason glared after her before getting back to work for the last few hours of his shift.

Chapter Text

It had been a long day at the shop and to say Roy was tired was an understatement. They’d been slammed with work which was great for business, but being down a worker for the day it was to the point he’d almost had to bring Lian back there after school instead of to the library like he’d promised.

Fortunately he had employees who were able to take the lead and lock up when they were done and seeing the look on her face when they walked in had been priceless. Despite the fact they’ve been there many times, her eyes still lit up as the children’s section came into view and he’d had to remind her that running wasn’t allowed as she all but dragged him over. She’d spend hours there if she was able.

With a yawn, Roy knocked on his daughter’s door. It was getting close to being 30 minutes after her bedtime. (He may or may not have fallen asleep on the couch briefly.)

There wasn’t an answer, which he half expected would be the case, so he slowly opened the door. Lian was curled up on her bed, stuffed animals strewn around her as she continued to read her book. It was clear she was enthralled by the story, not even bothering to look up to acknowledge him. He couldn’t help but smile at the scene.

“Li, it’s bedtime,” he told her gently. Fortunately, they’d done the rest of her bedtime routine beforehand so all that was left was getting her to settle in and turning the lights out.

“One more chapter,” she begged. “I just got to a good part.”

Roy had to stop himself from playfully rolling his eyes at her. All of the parts were a good part if it meant she could read more. She’d pulled that card one too many times and he’d finally caught on. “Nope, honey, it’s already past your bedtime and it’s a school night.” He sat down on the edge of her bed, holding his hand out. She reluctantly put a bookmark in her book then handed it over with a huff.

“We can go back to the library more though, right,” she asked.

“Mhm,” Roy hummed, tucking her in. “You had fun today?” He knew the answer but wanted to hear her say it.

“So much fun,” she told him, a yawn escaping despite her best efforts to smother it. “They have so many books, dad.”

He chuckled. “Most libraries do, Li.”

“And that librarian was really nice. He has good taste in books.”

Roy smiled, face heating slightly thinking back to that interaction. “You mean Jason? He did seem nice.”

Lian nodded, cuddling one of her stuffed animals close. “Yeah, I like him.”

~

After they said goodnight and the door clicked closed behind him, Roy went about his own nightly routine. The sun was long past the horizon as he closed the blinds on the surrounding city as he went about tidying the living room on his way to the kitchen. There he cleaned up the rest of the dishes from their dinner and put the leftovers away for him to take to work in the morning. He did some prep for Lian’s lunch as well to get a head start on tomorrow. The less morning Roy needed to do before fully consuming a cup of coffee the better.

Not long later he was in his own pajamas and finally crawling into bed, sighing as his aching muscles relaxed into the mattress. Closing his eyes, his body was ready for sleep, but it seemed his mind wasn’t. Instead, it wandered to the outstanding jobs waiting for him in the morning, a telltale sign the stress was getting to him.

He groaned. It was going to be one of those nights. One where his mind wouldn’t shut up and he’d spend half the night tossing and turning or staring at the ceiling. One of the nights where in the past he’d drink until the thoughts were nothing but white noise and his body didn’t bother to fight to stay awake. But he was sober now (and damn proud of it) so that wasn’t an option.

Instead he tried to let his mind wander to anything else but the chaos that awaited him in the morning once he left the apartment. It wasn’t his fault that his mind went to the librarian. Jason.

So yeah, Roy thought he was cute and maybe there was a tiny crush forming. He could have a thing for a librarian. Not that he’d pursue it. Imagine how pissed Lian would be if her dad were to ruin her favorite place. Nope, he could look and fantasize all he wanted as long as he didn’t act on it.

Chances are they wouldn’t even see Jason very often on their library tips anyway. There were plenty of other librarians working there and it wasn’t like they were going to always go at the same time. Shifts changed. Librarians moved to different branches or cities. The list went on and on. Roy wouldn’t avoid him per say but he could certainly limit the amount if it came to that.

Things were good with him and Lian. They had their routines. He was providing a stable life for his daughter. There was no reason to mess it up even if Jason had very pretty eyes he could (and almost did) get lost in. There was a chance Jason wasn’t even interested in men which made all of this spiraling even more pointless.

He shouldn’t be this far gone over one very short interaction and a bunch of what ifs. He shouldn’t. But his heart had melted just a bit as he watched him feed into Lian’s love of books. How her smile got wider when he asked for her opinion on the latest book she read and her eyes lit up as she started explaining what she’d liked about it. Yes, Roy had been standing there for a moment before he announced his presence, but in his defense it was rare for Lian to get along with someone so well when first meeting them.

It was a hit or a miss if she would let someone in and lately it’d been the latter. Once you earned her trust, you had it, but until then… good luck. She was guarded sometimes like her mother which Roy couldn’t fault her for. He had similar tendencies. But something about Jason had cracked through like magic.

Roy huffed and rolled back over to his other side trying to get comfortable. It was going to be a long night at this rate.

Chapter Text

“You look like a lost puppy waiting for his owner to come back,” Madi informed him for the third time today.

Jason briefly turned to glare at her before turning back to the screen in front of him. He was supposed to be contributing some plans for the programming next month for the teens, but his mind was elsewhere.

It’d been a couple of weeks since he’d seen Roy and Lian. Well, he’d seen them in passing. He’d been shelving or located in a different area and notice them come in. But he had a job to do and couldn’t just stroll up and say anything. No, that’d be awkward as hell. They probably didn’t even remember him. He’d always been told he blended into the background well.

“You’re down bad already,” she teased in a sing song voice, dropping a few books onto the desk.

He eyed the stack and realized it was a bunch of reshelves for the Young Adult section she was hoping he’d do for her. “And you’re walking on very thin ice this close to closing,” he shot back with a fake smile.

“You’re in a mood too.” Madi huffed and shot him an unimpressed look. “Dinner after shift at that noodle place you like. My treat.”

Jason had to weigh the pros and cons of that obvious bribe. Pro: He wouldn’t have to figure out dinner tonight. Not that he didn’t have anything to cook or couldn’t cook, but it would be nice to not have to worry about that when he got home. Con: Madi would make him talk about his feelings. Pro: He’d have leftovers to bring home and not have to worry about lunch tomorrow either. Con: He really didn’t want to talk about his feelings. Pro: He hadn’t been to the noodle place in a while and he was due for a night out with Madi. They always ended up having fun even if Jason was a drag to begin with. Con…

“Ugh fine,” he relented and rolled his eyes at her celebratory fist pump. She knew she’d had him once she offered food. Now she was just gloating.

“I’ll get you at closing,” she called over her shoulder as she skipped off to finish the rest of her to do list.

Jason let his head drop to the desk with a groan.

~

“It’s okay to have a crush on patrons,” Madi told him as she dipped another crab rangoon into her noodle soup before taking a bite. “I’ve thought plenty of them are cute.”

“It’s not that.” Jason continued moving the stir-fried noodles around his plate. “I mean it probably is but it’s also probably stupid.”

It had to be stupid. I mean he had one interaction with this guy and his daughter. That’s it. He shouldn’t be hung up on it. What was wrong with him?

“Jay, get out of your head for a minute and talk to me,” she encouraged. “I’m your friend I’m not going to judge you or make fun of you. That’s what your brothers are for.”

He looked up from his plate panicked. “You haven’t said anything, right?” Oh god, if Dick or Tim or, oh shit, especially Damian caught wind of this he was screwed. The teasing would never end. He’d be forced to move away from the area, change his name, and even then there was a chance of them tracking him down and tormenting him.

“You think that little of me?” She raised an eyebrow. “Come on now. I only send them embarrassing videos of you dropping a stack of books every once in a while.”

“Remind me how you integrated yourself in with them so well?” Madi had more of a standing relationship with his brothers than he even did despite only meeting them in-person a handful of times.

She shrugged. “Probably the same way I got you to be my friend. I’m very persistent.” She gave him a pointed look. “But stop changing the subject like you always do. So you like this Roy guy.” Jason cringed. Yeah, he really didn’t want to have this conversation. “What are you going to do about it?”

“Nothing.” Jason told her. “Absolutely nothing because there’s nothing to do about that.” It was pointless. Jason’s love life was… lackluster to put it nicely.

He didn’t put himself out there anymore after a few failed attempts. As much of a hopeless romantic that he was (thanks, Jane Austen), he just never seemed to be good enough for any of his partners to stay assuming they even made it past the first couple of dates. Besides, he wasn’t like Dick who could charm anyone or Tim who could impress people with how smart he was. He was just… Jason and clearly meant to be alone.

Her eyes narrowed. “That is such bullshit, Jay. Anyone would be lucky to have you.”

“My track record says otherwise,” he muttered turning back to his food.

Madi sighed. “We’ll work on it,” she told him gently.

~

It was dark by the time that they finished eating and the temperature had cooled down to the point that Madi had his cardigan wrapped over her shoulders as they walked in the direction of her apartment. Jason wasn’t about to have her walk home alone in the dark and his place wasn’t too far from hers anyway.

He chuckled at one of her stories from the day that she told animatedly, her bag of leftovers swinging from where she had it on her arm as she gestured.

“If you drop your leftovers I’m not giving you mine,” he warned her, but they both knew that wasn’t true.

“I’m telling you, you need to drop into that book club some time. We have the best time,” Madi told him before launching into another story from the day.

Jason listened, his eyes wandering to their surroundings. It was nice and peaceful and just what he needed. It wasn’t too busy out tonight, a few cars going down the street past them. They were on a less busy road, so there weren’t many people either. Shops across the street had mainly closed down for the night except for one.

He stopped as its sign caught his eye across the street and made him do a double take. Harper Automotives. The logo on Roy’s hat. It was like a beacon in the ever-growing dark. Some sort of sick joke from the universe maybe? How many times had he walked this way and never noticed it? Now the sign was lit up and lights were still on inside. One of the garage doors was open and Jason could see people still working inside.

He was about to make a comment to Madi about it when he heard his name called followed by the flash of a small figure running across the street. Next thing he knew Lian was standing in front of him.

“Hi, Jason,” she greeted him, smiling as if she didn’t just take her life into her own hands running across to say hi to him nearly giving him a heart attack in the process.

“Hi, Lian,” Jason replied. “It’s good to see you, but, uh, you probably shouldn’t be running across the street at night. That’s dangerous.”

She ignored his comment, instead moving on to give Madi a once over with narrowed eyes that lingered on his cardigan still hanging on her shoulders. “Are you his girlfriend?”

“Nope.” Madi was clearly trying to hold back her laughter and Jason was about ready to smack her for it. “Just a fellow Librarian and one of Jason’s few friends around here.”

He glared at her. “I have friends.”

“Lian!” Came a panicked call from across the street followed by some select curse words that were barely audible.

Without a second thought, Lian gabbed Jason by the hand and started leading him across the street, careful of cars. He heard Madi behind him still trying to hold back her laughter at the situation as she followed.

Roy was back lit by the lights on in the garage. His shirtsleeves were rolled up to his elbows and grease marking his arms (which were extremely toned not that Jason noticed) and somehow also on his forehead. Jason desperately wanted to walk over and wipe it off for him. His arms were crossed and brow furrowed as he looked down at his daughter who didn’t even have the decency to look like she felt bad for what she did.

“Li, how many times have I told you you can’t wander off when I’m working?” Roy asked.

“But I saw Jason and wanted to say hi.” She gestured to him and he sheepishly waved.

It seemed to be the first time that Roy noticed him standing there. Was that a blush? Probably not it was hard to tell in this lighting and with his hat blocking part of his face. “Oh, uh, hi, Jason.”

“Hi, Roy.”

“Sorry if she ambushed you on your-”

“I’m Madi. One of Jason’s colleagues and friends whether he likes it or not,” she cut him off. She walked over and offering her hand which Roy shook. “You work here?” She asked as though it wasn’t obvious.

“I, uh, own it actually.” Roy rubbed the back of his neck. “Bought it a couple of years ago when the old owners decided to retire.”

“Very cool,” Madi said looking around.

“Sorry about her,” Jason piped in. “She can be a bit much. And we should really be going.” He hoped Madi would get the hint but she continued to wander through the space.

Roy chuckled at that. “No worries. Sorry about Lian. She’s been raving about you ever since a couple weeks ago. I think we just keep missing you during our visits.” Jason’s heart swelled a little bit at that new information.

“Jason,” Lian tugged on his hand. “Can I show you the book I’m reading?”

“Uh, sure if it’s okay with your dad?” He’d lost track of Madi at this point which was a problem in itself.

“You can show him really quickly. Jason probably needs to get home. I’m almost done here,” Roy relented.

Lian squealed, leading Jason over to her reading spot which was the front desk. There was a blanket draped over the chair and a stuffed cat sitting on it. Her backpack was tipped over on the floor. She quickly grabbed a book from the pile and showed him. It was another Magic Tree House one. A few books past where she’d been in the series last they spoke.

“Oh, that’s a good one! What do you think so far?”

She didn’t have to be asked twice, immediately diving into her analysis of it and her favorite parts. Jason couldn’t help but smile.

~

By the time they were back walking and out of an earshot, Madi was listing off everything she learned. “His name’s Roy Harper. Originally from Star City. Also adopted so you two have that in common.”

“What did you do? Go through all of his stuff?” Jason was mortified.

“As your friend, it’s my duty to vet out who you might date.”

“By breaking into his place of work.”

“I didn’t break in anywhere! His daughter invited us in and I just happened to wander into his office a little bit while he went back to working and you were distracted.

He groaned. “You did not.”

“I did!” Madi pulled out her phone and shoved it in his face. “And look who else he has a connection to.”

Jason pulled his face away from the phone a bit so he could actually see. She’d taken a picture of one of the framed photos in his office it seemed. In it  his eyes were drawn to an unmistakably younger looking Roy smiling, his face dotted with more freckles than it was now. He was with a group of people all gathered around, smiling and laughing. Scanning further he realized he recognized the boy standing next to him with an arm draped over his shoulders. None other than Dick Grayson, his brother. What were the chances?

“Not a word,” Jason threatened. All Madi did was laugh in response.

Chapter Text

Jason may or may not have done some light internet stalking in his free time since that last encounter with Roy and Lian. Which may or may not have led him to making a perfectly normal visit to his brother at his apartment an hour away on one of his days off.

Dick’s apartment was a decently sized one bedroom located downtown in the next city over. It gave off a domestic, homey feel from the secondhand furniture to the warm lighting from the lamps and windows overlooking the cityscape to the framed photos of friends and family cluttering the walls. Jason didn’t even want to know how much he paid for rent knowing it was far more than his modest studio.

He could’ve avoided this entire trip and simply texted Tim to do some digging instead, but that would’ve opened a whole other can of worms he wasn’t ready to risk opening yet. This was the safer bet. Some easy recon to appease his curiosity and then move on with his life.

Dick placed two coffee cups on the coffee table in front of the couch and Jason eagerly grabbed his since he’d skipped out on his normal caffeine dose on the way over. “So, what brings you to my neck of the woods, Jaybird?”

His brother didn’t say it in an accusing tone but Jason bristled at the question nonetheless out of habit. It wasn’t rare for him to visit and he didn’t only show up when he needed something. Yes, he’d been the one to move the furthest away, but he still did his due diligence to see family. Not quite as much as they liked but he was at least making more of an effort than he had in the past.

“Consider this the last time I try to visit you on a day off,” he muttered into his coffee. Maybe this had been a mistake.

“Hey, I didn’t mean it like that and you know it,” Dick told him, his tone softening as he leaned back and savored the contents of his own mug. “I’m not Bruce. I’m not accusing. I’m not being moody about it. I’m happy you’re here. It’s just been a while is all.”

“It hasn’t been that long.”

“Jay, I haven’t seen you in person in two months despite being only an hour away.”

“Shit, really?” He hadn’t realized that it had been that long and a little bit of guilt nagged at him. He was probably due for a family dinner night in the near future if that was the case. “Sorry, the library’s been busy.”

“How’s that going by the way?” Dick asked seeming eager to move on with the conversation and latch onto whatever topic Jason was willing to talk about. “Last I heard you all were still a bit short staffed.”

Jason filled in Dick on the latest that yes they were still short staffed, but that he was still enjoying his job. In return, Dick started sharing stories about the latest shenanigans going on at the gym he worked at. They easily fell into their usual banter as though no time had really passed.

When a slight lull came up in the conversation, he figured this was the time to bring up what he wanted to ask. Might as well just rip the bandaid off. Jason looked down at his mug, passing it from hand to hand and looking at it as though it was the most interesting object in the world. “By the way, do you know a Roy Harper?”

Jason chanced a look up, watching as Dick tilted his head to the side, his eyebrows furrowing at the question. “Roy and I were friends yeah,” he replied. “I mean I feel like we’re more acquaintances now. We were definitely closer when we were younger, but we still keep in touch occasionally.”

“What happened between you two?” His mind was running through different scenarios that could fill in the new blanks appearing as the story unfolded. A fight of some sort? Simply going their own ways?

Dick sighed. “Roy...” He trailed off, trying to find the right words. “Roy fell in with a bad crowd and picked up some bad habits. Got in some serious trouble.”

“Like arrested?” Was he crushing on a criminal? Not that that would completely make or break things but it surprised him. Roy didn’t seem like the criminal type.

“No nothing like that,” Dick rushed to correct. “It’s probably not my place to say, but Roy went through some things. Used alcohol as a coping mechanism and it… spiraled from there.”

Jason stayed silent letting that new information sink in. He understood unhealthy coping mechanisms and addiction from his own battle with self-harm. Understood how dark of a place one could get to and how difficult it was to claw your way back up. He’d done it himself, was still doing it if he was honest. As his therapist liked to remind him, healing isn’t always linear. He gently tugged the sleeve of his cardigan down a bit more, a habit more than anything. “He seems to be doing better though ever since his daughter was born.” He nodded. That made sense.

“Why are you asking?” Dick was giving him with a look he couldn’t quite read and Jason could feel his anxiety spike ever so slightly.

“Oh.” shit why hadn’t he thought of an excuse that was viable and not lame. Oh, just low-key crushing on this guy and it’s probably nothing I mean I barely know him but I know you know him and I need more information to hopefully deter me from this stupid crush because I forgot how terrible they are, but he actually seems like a really good guy and now I’m conflicted. “I, uh, met him and his daughter at the library a while back. Seemed kinda familiar but I couldn’t place it.” That sounded realistic enough.

Dick’s eyes narrowed. “I don’t think you and Roy ever crossed paths when we were friends.”

Shit. “Sure we did.” He could feel his cheeks heating up and he turned his gaze back to his mug, tracing the arrow pattern painted on the side with a finger.

“No, you wouldn’t have. Bruce refused to let me have him over because he was adopted by Oliver Queen and Bruce hated, well, still hates him to some degree now, but really hated him back then.” Busted.

Looking back up Jason could see the cogs turning in Dick’s brain as he started putting the pieces together. “You want to tell me what this is about or do I need to reach out to Madi? I have my theories but I want to hear you say it.”

Jason knew Madi wouldn’t rat him out, but his mind was on a loop of nope, nope, nope. Back pedal! “It’s nothing. We should go back to talking about that new trainer you think is cute at your gym. What’s his name again? Wally?” Anything to abandon this topic while he still had his dignity.

“No, no, no, Jaybird, we’re talking about this.” Dick was now using his big brother voice which meant not only was he not about to drop this topic, but now Jason was in for a lecture. Kill him now. He groaned and leaned back into the couch hoping it would swallow him up. He had no such luck. Dick took his mug from him, placing it on the coffee table next to his own. “So you like Roy I’m assuming?”

It felt like his face was on fire from the embarrassment. “I never said that.” Yeah, death would be kinder than this, Jason was sure of it.

“Okay, hypothetically if you did,” Dick continued on, his eye roll clear in the tone he used. “I don’t think that’s a bad thing.”

Jason raised an eyebrow. He could tell his brother actually believed what he was saying. ”That’s easy for you to say.”

Dick could charm anyone without even trying. He was the epitome of a Golden Retriever in human form, completely irresistible and lovable. An actual ray of sunshine and not to mention extremely attractive which was obvious to anyone with eyes. Jason on the other hand was like a grumpy old cat that someone found in their dumpster, rough around the edges and probably better off alone. He could think of at least ten reasons off the top of his head why people should steer clear of him, especially Roy.

“I know that look. Stop overthinking it.”

“I’m not overthinking it.” Great, now he sounded like a whiny toddler arguing with his brother. “I just don’t think it’s a good idea to act on anything. I shouldn’t have even asked.”

“But you did come over here and were asking about him.” Dick pointed out. “Which leads me to believe that you’re smitten. Maybe even past that point.”

“Not you too.” Jason groaned, sitting up. “Look, it’s not a good idea. He has a kid-”

“Lots of people have kids. You just take it slow.”

“He’s doing fine on his own-”

“But he could be doing better with someone else. That’s not your decision to make for him.”

“I’d be a terrible boyfriend-”

“That’s because you-”

“Dick, stop.” Jason pinched the bridge of his nose. Leave it to the optimist to try to find the bright side of everything.

Dick sighed and placed a hand on his shoulder. “I just want you to be happy, Jay,” he said earnestly. “You refuse to see the good in yourself. You’re so hard on yourself, but you deserve happiness. I hope you know that.”

“And, on that note, I’m leaving!” Jason announced, standing up. He couldn’t spend another minute here. He could feel his anxiety starting to stir under his skin. His eyes were starting to burn with the telltale sign of tears coming and he was not about to cry in front of Dick today. “Thank you for the coffee. See you again in another two months.”

The door closed behind him with a thud as he booked it for his motorcycle outside.