Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

“We’re lost again! How could we get lost all the way here to the other side of Katipunan?”

Aya was flustered and frazzled. Somehow, the jeepney they thought was on the way to Diliman ended up with them at the town center. Even worse, they were not sure of the best way back to Diliman. Maybe they should’ve called a Grab instead. Still, with Christmas rolling in, they needed to save as much as possible for presents. Not to mention Grab becoming unreliable near rush hour. Damn Hina and her vague instructions on how to get there!

“Maybe we shouldn’t have accepted that lantern parade invite,” Chisato sighed.

“But I was hoping to see the jellyfish…” Kanon looked disappointed.

“Maybe we should call Sayo or Rinko?” Aya suggested.

They pondered their solutions before they recognized a group of UP students carrying supplies. Suddenly the group approached them.

“Do they recognize us??? Outside of our disguises???” Aya said in shock, and mild vanity.

“Is that Kaoru with them?” Kanon pointed out.

Indeed, it was Kaoru, surrounded by who she could presume to be her underclassmen and batch mates. All of them carried various supplies that they assumed were for the lantern parade. Kaoru carried something in a dry cleaning bag and another bag filled with red fabric. 

Kaoru spoke, “What serendipity it is to see you three here. Surely your presence here means you’ve accepted dear Hina’s invitation to our grand parade of lights?”

“Yeah! Then we took the wrong jeep and ended up here…” replied Kanon. 

“I see… even I must admit that the road to Diliman is a labyrinth, but I offer to be your Ariadne’s thread. Would you like to accompany us? I certainly wouldn’t mind escorting three lovely ladies.” Kaoru offered. Surely this was better than getting lost again and ending up God knows where.

Kaoru led them to a nearby jeepney and ushered everyone inside. Chisato found herself seated next to Kaoru with Kanon and Aya facing them. Kaoru collected everyone’s fare and passed it to the driver. After a few seconds, the jeepney engine growled and started to move.

The December breeze blew in their faces as the jeepney rushed through several trees and cars. It has been a while since December was this cold, with her hairs standing up and shaking a little. She found herself recalling how cold it was that time she was on vacation with Kaoru’s family and how they were bundled up in jackets, holding hands on the way to the horse riding area. Strange. She hadn’t thought about their childhood escapades until now. She was distracted from her thoughts after they felt a few bumps on the road and just noticed that Kaoru held her hand, like they were riding it for the first time.

Finally, they saw the Oblation and they saw some of the floats being prepared for tonight. She could spot some speakers and lights and students running and yelling at each other for last minute preparations. Finally, Kaoru asked the driver to stop in front of Sunken Garden. They spotted Sayo, Lisa, Rinko, and Yukina. Lisa waved at them as the jeepney came to a stop. One by one, they got down from the jeepney.

Without any hesitation, Kaoru reached out her hand and led her down the jeepney.

“Thank you, Kaoru.”

“‘Tis a pleasure, do enjoy the show we have on later.”

Her gaze lingered on Kaoru as she walked away. She always wondered what happened to this girl before their graduation. How she seemed to carry herself differently. How she now had a certain gravitas that attracted more people that she would have liked. How she had a certain arrogance and pride to her that felt out of place.

And yet. Seeing Kaoru like this stirred something in her.

What changed? Why?

—

The lantern parade didn’t disappoint as usual. The fine arts students brought out an entire carnival while the social sciences department figured out a brilliant boat that when you took a closer look was made out of tiny paper boats that lit up, no doubt thanks to Maya’s talents, who they spotted close to the float leading the drummers with a smile on her face as Christmas jingles played all around. The college of science refused to be beaten though, and Chisato couldn’t help but flash a smile while Kanon watched the dancers using iridescent jellyfish umbrellas as they accompanied a gorgeous display of marine life, from coral reefs cleverly fashioned from melted plastic to tiny fish dotting the float as the main attraction, the automaton whale shark swam that through the sea of people. They could spot Hina happily piloting the whale, waving at the crowd the entire time.

Finally, the College of Arts and Letters came by, a magnificent float decorated like a stage showed a variety of scenes, from the magnificent Adarna bird to Florante tenderly holding Aladin in his arms, to Ibarra and Maria in the balcony after his return, to Alfonso and Julia’s reunion years after their youth. She recalled the long days of hiding in empty classrooms sitting next to Kaoru reading those familiar stories. Diliman felt familiar now.

The performance then started, Kaoru and a fellow student came out from the curtains on the float. She saw Kaoru dressed in a barong while the girl with her wore a terno. She saw Kaoru dance with the girl on the float as if they were from a dream. She saw herself on the float dancing with Kaoru instead. The soft glow of the lantern brought her back to the first afternoon they learned to dance together, after Kaoru had watched one of her shows and pleaded with her to teach her the steps. She wanted to relive those memories. She hated how her heart knew this to be true. Maybe wanting to go back to those halcyon days of doing everything together, the time she and Kaoru clumsily danced El Bimbo, the time they first entered Catholic school together, the time they silently sat in the prayer room, the most quiet room they could find in the school, comforting one another after a bad day. The time she realized, she loved Kaoru. How kindly she smiled, how she looked at her with admiration, how every time Kaoru called her name she felt like she was Chisato Shirasagi, her best friend, and not Chisato Shirasagi, child actress. But for all she knew, perhaps the past was best forgotten, like how dead stars in the sky seemingly lingered on in their place in the heavens. And yet, it was as if the past still lived on in her, and she wondered why all of it came rushing back.

—

Finally the lantern parade itself came to an end, but most of the crowd stayed to watch some bands perform. The group made their way to the Carillon plaza to meet up with the others to have dinner. They managed to spot Hina and Maya making their way to them.

“Awesome job, you guys! You sure know how to have a good time.” Lisa congratulated them.

Hina greeted her sister. “Ate Sayo onee-chan! Did you see the whale?” Hina immediately held Aya and kissed her. “Aya! Did you see me pilot that?” Maya meanwhile had Eve on video call. Eve could be heard excitedly talking to Maya and greeting Aya and Hina, Maya turned the phone in her direction and she waved. The whole group started congratulating the two of them before Kanon asked, “Where’s Kaoru?”

“She said she’s gonna help out – never mind! Here she is!” Hina pointed at the figure approaching them. 

Kaoru, still in barong, walked over to them and was greeted with the same congratulations. She took a deep bow before everyone. “I am honored you have enjoyed our performance,” she said. “I only wished to see everyone before returning to collect my things, worry not for I shall be able to join you all for our evening repast. You may go ahead.” Everyone headed to the food hall while Chisato stayed with Kaoru. 

“Do you wish to join me?” Kaoru offered.

“We could catch up.” Chisato replied.

“Did you enjoy the performance?”

“It was certainly something to behold.”

“I’m glad you did. It was inspired by you after all.”

They stopped at the entrance of the college building. They could overhear the music by the bands and a familiar song played. 

“Magkahawak ang ating kamay na walang kamalay-malay, na tinuruan mo ang puso ko, na umibig ng tunay”

Her heart nearly stopped when she heard those words. “What do you mean I inspired it?”

“I could never let go of you. My dear Paraluman who guides me in the darkest of nights.” Kaoru admitted, looking away from her. “I could never regret that time of our youth spent together, even after we drifted apart. I could not blame you for anything.” Kaoru looked at her, and she found herself looking at the young woman who was once her friend and lover in what felt like a lifetime ago. Yet, she found herself pressing her hand against her face and the way her eyes still beheld the girl she knew, she felt her emotions rushing through. She obstinately held on to the thought that Kaoru had changed into someone she didn’t know. But maybe Kaoru was always like this. And the girl she knew just changed how she acted but never how she truly was.

“Why? After all these years…” Chisato asked, voice heavy and almost trembling. 

“Because you made me realize what true love is,” Kaoru confessed, “and life felt all the brighter.”

“I wish I told you sooner how I felt then.” Chisato admitted to Kaoru and to herself. 

“And yet, here you are making yourself comfortable by my side once more.” Kaoru smiled, and then, she reminisced “Do you remember how we danced in your parents’ house?”, holding her hand out like they were still five and not twenty. 

“I do remember, and you liked that El Bimbo dance from TV,” Chisato playfully teased, accepting Kaoru’s hand.

“And I thought I would only dance with you again in my dreams.” Kaoru said. Holding her closer. Chisato appreciated how much taller she had gotten since their high school years, she pressed against her chest and heard the beating of her heart. Kaoru rested her hands on her arms and her head over her shoulder. 

They never let go of each other once during the song. How she held her close. How everything brought her back to this dance. Though those stars in the sky have long died, the light they shined on from the heavens is still here, illuminating this night.

Chapter Text

So to explain everything. This is set in an AU where the college girls all go to Filipino universities. I also added a lot of references to Filipino literature because why not?

Filipino university AUs are deeply entrenched in the fandom culture here. They usually center on four universities that we call the Big Four: UST (University of Santo Tomas), ADMU (Ateneo de Manila University), UP (University of the Philippines), and DLSU (De La Salle University). My logic as to which universities they go to is based on both their personalities and their courses in-game. But for now, I’ll explain why Chisato and Kaoru go to ADMU and UP respectively.

Kaoru matches the stereotype of a UP student, quirky, but they quickly prove how intelligent they are about their respective fields. This is also based on personal experience but whenever I meet a UP student they tend to be so passionate about their chosen field and other personal interests that it both terrifies and amazes the people around them. There’s also a sense of responsibility in them to be of service to others.

Chisato being Ateneo was partly a seiyuu joke since Sumipe happened to attend Sophia University, which is run by Jesuits just like Ateneo. But I will say, the more I thought about it the more it fits. Ateneo has a strong humanities program, and they’re often stereotyped as serious and studious, with a certain naivete in some of them. It quite fits Chisato and I think it’s a welcome break for her.

The fic takes place in University of The Philippines - Diliman (the main campus of the UP system) during the lantern parade. The lantern parade is a yearly tradition in December that has the colleges of UP create lantern floats to celebrate the end of the semester and the start of Christmas break. Why are the other girls here then if it’s a UP tradition? I’m not sure when it started but other students started going to watch the lantern parade just to see the performances and act as emotional support for friends that go to UP. It’s wild.

As for the literature referenced.

Dead Stars by Paz Márquez-Benítez - A short story. Famous for being the first Filipino short story written in English. The scene referenced in the story is when Alfonso and Julia meet again after spending some time together when they were young.

Noli Me Tangere by Jose Rizal - A book written to criticize the Spanish government when The Philippines was a Spanish colony. The scene referenced in the story is when Ibarra (the main character) reunites with his childhood friend Maria after several years abroad.

Ibong Adarna - An epic poem that’s required reading for 1st year high school students. The only reference in the story is the Adarna bird that’s part of the float.

Florante and Laura - A Filipino poem that subverts the then-popular moro-moro plays that depicted Christians and Muslims in battle. The scene referenced is Aladin (one of the main characters of the poem) saving Florante (the other main character of the poem) from lions about to eat him. (On a more personal note, this made me very delusional and I was convinced they were the real couple of the story)

The song that inspired the fic is Ang Huling El Bimbo by Eraserheads, a band from UP. The link is in the first chapter. Usually the song evokes nostalgia and lost love.