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Fall was in full swing, as well it should be. It was finally Halloween, and Jon had been looking forward to it. He actually had a girlfriend this year, Daenerys Targaryen, and she’d hinted at some kind of private celebration once they were in costume. At present, though, they were in his Uncle Benjen’s front yard. It was Jon, Dany, and his teammates Sam, Edd, and Tormund (a double super senior, but still technically on the team).
“Thanks for helping,” said Jon, as they set up some overdue decorations.
“No problem,” said Sam. Tormund just grunted, and Edd said nothing, likely waiting for just the right comment to come to mind.
Uncle Benjen was a bachelor, and had done things minimally before this year, but now that Jon was in the house he’d wanted to do things up, especially since he’d have some help passing out candy, at least for a bit before Jon and his friends went out to a costume party Dany’s brother was having. Trouble was he’d left it til the last minute.
But Jon wasn’t complaining. It was a nice change after the tumultuous summer he’d had. He missed home, though. Missed his cousins. But he lived here, now, and that was that.
“It’s looking quite good,” said Dany, beaming at him. He smiled back.
“That it does!” said Tormund, finally getting a bigger decoration placed, a huge wooden Other. They stepped back to take a look at their handiwork. It looked like a scene out of the legends of the Long Night: Others and White Walkers haunted the yard. Uncle Benjen had even gotten a dummy kitted out in the fashion of their school’s namesake, so there was one Night’s Watchman being savaged by the terrible undead. “Now that there is some good sacrilege!”
“Wow, a three syllable word…” muttered Edd, wiping some sweat from his brow. Tormund just flipped him off. Sam opened his mouth to speak when suddenly his face was covered in yolk. They had no time to react as a barrage of eggs pelted them. Jon tried his best to cover Dany, and Tormund whirled around to holler at whoever it was doing this. Unfortunately, though, an egg hit him in the open mouth and all he could do was cough and splutter.
Jon looked up to see a car with three blonde boys about their age in it, now hurling rolls of toilet paper. It was a sleek red convertible, and the boys all wore red and gold letterman jackets. Two of the three were laughing uproariously, with the third just chuckling.
“Happy Halloween, Crows!” Said the one with the shortest cropped hair, the driver. He hopped properly back into his seat and backed up into Benjen’s yard. He spun his wheels, tearing up the lawn, and then sped away before anyone could get a word in edgewise. Jon glared at the car as it raced off.
“Oh, no!” cried Dany, and he turned to look. Rage boiled up inside him. The Halloween display was ruined, toilet paper sticking to the egg yolk on the decorations, and even on Uncle Benjen’s porch. That was to say nothing of the grass.
“Gods damn it,” he muttered. He looked to see Sam wiping egg off his face, and Tormund spit out a few pieces of eggshell. “Any idea who they were?”
“Lannister Academy colors,” said Edd.
“I think that was their quarterback,” said Tormund. “Jeff or something.”
“Joffrey,” corrected Sam.
“Joffrey Lannister?” asked Dany, and they all looked at her.
“Wait, Lannister?” asked Jon. She nodded.
“His family owns the school,” she said. “His mother is the headmistress there.”
“Really?” asked Tormund. She nodded again.
“My school does dances with them,” she said, “left over from when it was an all-boys academy, and ours was all-girls.” Tormund laughed. “What?”
“I heard the headmistress is fucking the football coach,” he said. “No wonder a skinny prat like him is on the team.” Dany rolled her eyes.
“No, the coach is her brother,” she said. Tormund just laughed harder.
“That’s,” he wheezed, “that’s so much better!” Dany just rolled her eyes again and sighed.
“So we know who they are, at least,” said Jon. They looked at him. “Let’s get this cleaned up… I think we’re going to be late to the party tonight.”
***
Night had fallen, and they’d left Uncle Benjen’s house. They had managed to get things fairly clean, and Benjen had told them that once night fell it wouldn’t look that bad. They hadn’t told them that they already knew who did it though, at Jon’s insistence. They were all in costume, now: Jon had dressed as a wolfman, Dany had shown up as a Red Priestess, Sam was in a soldier outfit, Edd had done himself up as a White Walker, and Tormund was in a huge ape costume. They’d told Benjen that they were on their way to Viserys’ party. In reality, they had a stop to make first.
The Lannisters were having their own Halloween do, a bash apparently thrown by Joffrey’s uncle (not the one Tormund was now insisting was a sister fucker) every year. That meant they knew where he’d be. More importantly, they knew where his car would be.
They had met in a different spot, and then piled in Jon’s car. He was glad he had it, and for tonight he was even more glad it was a bit of a beater. It wasn’t flashy. Wasn’t memorable. There were plenty of black Cadillacs around town, after all.
But what there were not a lot of were red ‘72 Chevys in prime condition. Joffrey’s car stood out, even amongst the nice cars at the Lannister estate. Well, mostly because Jon had been fixated on it since the attack on Benjen’s house. Crimson red with gold racing stripes. Jon trusted Sam and Edd with his car, while he, Tormund, and Dany (who insisted), snuck around to Joffrey’s car. There was security in the lot, but mostly at the door. They moved as quickly as stealth would allow, ducking between vehicles to avoid the direct line of sight of the door men. They were in costume, but still.
Jon kept look-out with Dany as Tormund started in on the car. Jon couldn’t see his face through the mask, but knew he must be positively beaming. Joffrey had left the windows down. He was far too comfortable. Well, he’d learn his lesson tonight.
Tormund worked his magic, hotwiring it in what Jon was sure had to be record time. The engine came to life, and Tormund hurried them into the back of the vehicle. They backed out and drove off, things just busy enough in the lot that they thought they might not have been seen. And if they had, All they would see was a guy in a gorilla suit.
“So, where to, Commander?” Tormund asked, glee and sarcasm dripping in his voice. Jon smirked.
“Well, we wouldn’t want to take it too far from home,” said Jon. “Which way is Lannister Academy, again?” Dany smiled, and crawled up into the passenger seat, giving Jon a fantastic view of her rear. That costume was certainly helping things, as far as he was concerned. She gave Tormund directions.
Jon studied the car for a bit. The seats were some kind of fancy leather, and it looked in good condition. But, there were telltale signs of someone who didn’t care about their car. Fast food wrappers under the seats, a few errant fries and crisps, and what he thought might actually be a cigarette burn. Prideful shit like Joffrey was supposed to be should have more care, Jon thought. He supposed getting handed something as nice as this didn’t exactly speak to being able to fully appreciating it.
Sam and Edd followed in Jon’s car, and soon they had arrived. Tormund got the bolt cutters, and let them in through the gate. Jon drove Joffrey’s car onto the field. He stopped the car, leaving it running, and Sam looked around nervously.
“We’re going to be caught…” he said, quietly. Jon shook his head.
“No we won’t,” he said. “Now, let’s get to work.”
Jon had things all planned out. They weren’t going to ruin the car, per se. Weren’t gonna keep it, or crash it, or total it. Too much heat. But, they could still ruin Joffrey’s mood for a good long while, and that was its own reward.
Tormund came back from the football field’s maintenance shed, having busted in and found the field paint. They popped open the buckets, and splashed it all over the outside of the car. Jon took a bucket and poured it out in the back seat. Edd took out a cigarette, took a drag, and then put it out on the passenger seat. Tormund one-upped him by pulling out a roach, smoking it, and putting it out on the driver’s seat.
“What now?” asked Dany, looking over their handiwork. Jon smiled. He got into the driver’s seat, and started revving the engine. He got the tires spinning, digging into the Lannister field and sending mud flying. Then, he took off, driving up and down the field.
They cheered him on. Jon almost felt bad. This car handled like a dream, honestly. It was a damn shame he wasn’t a thief. Well, not that kind of thief.
He pulled back up in front of his crew, and hopped out. The undercarriage of Joffrey’s car was now caked in dirt and mud, which was blending fabulously with the paint that covered the top half. All in all, he thought, things seemed pretty even.
Then, Tormund hopped in the driver’s seat and started driving. He got some distance from them, and started doing donuts. Even from here, Jon could hear his wild laughter. The four of them could only stare and keep distance as he made his way across the field, doing donut after donut, tearing up grass and sending mud everywhere. He drove back to them, and before he got out Jon saw him take out his knife, and slash the driver’s seat.
“Why?” asked Sam, finally pulling out of his stupor. Tormand snorted.
“Cause fuck ‘em,” said Tormund. “Also, there’s no way they get this fixed in time for their next game. They either forfeit or play at a ‘lesser’ field.” He laughed to himself.
“Explains that,” said Edd, jerking his thumb towards the mural of the school’s crest. Jon let out a surprised laugh. It seemed Tormund had kept on working while Jon had been caking Joffrey’s car in mud: he’d taken the field paint and drawn dicks all around the Lannister Lion’s face, using the white to full effect.
“Alright,” said Jon, “let’s get out of here.”
“Yes, let’s,” said Sam. They piled into Jon’s car, taking Sam and Edd home first. The plan was to meet at Visery’s house as if they hadn’t all just been together, and pretend they’d been there the whole time. As soon as they dropped off Edd, Dany insisted on sitting in the backseat with Jon, and having Tormund drive. Jon wasn’t sure why, until she started giving him a particular look.
“You know,” she whispered, “avenging your uncle was very… exciting.” She traced her fingers along his chest.
“Was it?” he whispered back. She bit her lip and nodded. She continued tracing down his chest, towards his jeans. Jon looked towards Tormund, whose eyes were on the road. Then he looked back at Dany, giving him those eyes, wearing that ridiculously sexy Red Priestess outfit, and frankly he was decidedly less worried about whatever Tormund might or might not see.
Danny unzipped his fly, and pulled out his cock. Dany gave the tip a kiss. Then she gave it another. Then another. And as his manhood hardened, she gave it a long lick from base to head. Jon fought to stay quiet as she took him into her mouth.
Dany started sucking, long and slow, looking up at him with those gorgeous violet eyes of hers. She bobbed her head up and down, taking him further and further into her mouth with each pass. Then she would stop, taking a moment to lick up and down his shaft.
“Gods,” whispered Jon, barely breathing out the word. She reached into his boxers, fondling his balls as she got back to it, peppering his cock with kisses again before taking it back between her lips.
She sucked him in a manner he could only describe as greedily, taking him all the way to the base over and over, still working her fingers,and still looking up at him. It was soon all too much. He tried to warn her a bit too late, but she didn’t seem to care. She seemed like she might choke for a moment, but went all the way down, and he watched her swallow in time with each twitch of his cock.
She kept her eyes on his as she slowly drew back, and he was absolutely hooked. She’d had him from the moment he first laid eyes on her, to be sure, but when she did stuff like this it was impossible to imagine being with anyone else. She got up beside him and kissed him.
“You can return the favor after the party,” she whispered. Jon just nodded, eager for the prospect. It was then that he noticed they were on a side road. Almost the same moment he did, Tormund made a turn that Jon knew headed back to the main road. But he never looked in the back seat. That told Jon all he needed to know, honestly.
They arrived at Viserys’, and the place was packed. Tons of costumes meant they blended in immediately, and Tormund wasted no time getting a drink and hitting the dance floor, an instant hit as a dancing gorilla. Sam and Edd eventually made appearances, and Jon and Dany felt good about ducking off to the side for a bit.
“There you are,” said a voice, and they turned to see Viserys. “You’d think you hadn’t been here, the way you’d been avoiding me.” He smirked knowingly.
“Why distract you from hosting?” asked Dany, sweetly.
“Why indeed,” he said. He looked back out to the crowd of people. “Well, you two have fun. Just make sure to be seen doing so.” Viserys helped them mingle, and complained to anyone who thought to ask about how his sister had simply taken forever with her hair and make-up. And, though he couldn’t prove it, he was just sure she’d snuck her boyfriend into her room much earlier than expected.
Their indignation only helped their cover, as Jon would think on later.
They partied the rest of the night, managing to have a genuinely good time. Dany even snuck back to Benjen’s place with Jon, and they had a little nightcap. The next morning, Jon couldn’t help but grin as he listened to the radio, news coming in about vandalism at the Lannister Academy football field.
The Crows were set to play the Lions in a few weeks. He wondered if their quarterback’s car would be restored by then.