Work Text:
Hange was calmly drinking coffee when they suddenly remembered they had to grade chemistry assignments. They grabbed their satchel, took out the papers, and began. They came across one specific, (TERRIBLE), students paper: Momo Ayase. That gayass student.. they just KNEW they were in the closet.. but couldn't prove it. Now, of course everything is a study to Hange, so they made it their mission to find out. Suddenly, Momo Ayase walked right passed the cafe they were at.
"MOMO!!!" yelped Hange. The whole café turned to look at them, bewildered.
"Oh, hi Mx Zoe!!!
"Momo. COME HERE. I was grading your paper and.."
"Is it bad??? Something wrong with it??"
"Momo, are you gay?"
The question lingered in the air for a second.
"...?"
Hange felt the need to explain. "You're too stylish but tomboyish but fucked up in the head. Only a gay person can be all that, Momo. What are you hiding?"
"Hange- WHAT" Momo started to panic, she felt very confused.
"Deny it. I DARE YOU"
"Uh- uhh ATTACK" Momo punched Hange IN THE FACE.
Hange plopped to the ground but rapidly adjusted their glasses on their hooked nose.
Momo dusted her skirt.
Hange lifted up a finger to say "Violent, too! I am afraid, Ms. Ayase, that I must diagnose you with gay."
"WHAT THE FLIPFLOP"
the end