Chapter Text
“Goodbye, evergreen.
You know I love you,
But everything heaven sent,
Must burn out in the end.”
Dust and loose stones kicked up behind her with every rapid step, the woman thundering along the dirt road. The morning sun cut shadows through the trees overhead, the countryside quiet as she ran and ran, chest heaving with effort. Running these days was different. Less practiced, less studied, less perfect. There was no need to think about strategies or tactics, no sense in obsessing over the details of a track or micro-managing her diet. The only thing that mattered was putting one foot in front of another, again and again, like she had when she was young.
Running on and on through the countryside, rounding past bends in the less-traveled road and slowing down near intersections, she kept her pace up as best she could. Her youthful exuberance had been replaced with a seriousness honed by years of racing against the best competition she could have, and now, years on from her heyday, she could sense how her legs gave out quicker, how her lungs had to work harder to match that same pace she once held.
Still, time would have to work much harder to slow her down.
The dirt road suddenly gave way to pavement, and she slowed her pace just a touch to account for it. The harder substance was tougher on her knees and prone to causing slips if one wasn’t careful. Soon, the quiet rural town came into sight as the brown-haired woman rounded past the final bend, a slight decline leading her onwards to her destination. Positioning herself on the berm to account for cars, her pace slowed further as she entered the quiet northern town, cutting right to head down a side street.
Carrying on past the sleepy houses still yet to rise for the morning, a specific building came into view, one that evoked distant memories that brought a small smile to her lips. Although recent renovations had spruced up its appearance, the community centre stood much like it had twenty years prior during her childhood, acting as a focal point for her hometown of Hidaka.
She had managed to move past the bittersweet pangs of returning home a while ago, but those emotions would still tug at her every so often.
Slowing down as she approached, the young woman broke out in a wide smile as she caught sight of a small gathering just outside the doors to the main building, a contingent of her troop already waiting for her, eager to begin their Saturday. “Good morning, Miss Spe!” A bay-haired horsegirl called out, waving a hand above her head. The two girls flanking her, one smiling happily and the other appearing rather sleepy, also waved.
“Good morning, girls.” Special Week replied, walking up to them. Rummaging around her knapsack, the woman fished out her set of keys to unlock the door, holding it open for the trio to slip inside. “Go get changed, I’ll meet you all out back.”
She watched the three of them hurry off together, heading for the changerooms. When she had returned home to Hokkaido, Special Week had expected to leave her racing days behind her. Between needing to focus on helping her mom out with the house and farm, as well as splitting her time with online and the infrequent in-person college classes in nearby Sapporo, Spe hadn’t expected the phone call she had gotten over a year prior, from none other than her old teammate, Tokai Teio.
As it turned out, after graduating from Tracen, Teio had landed herself not only a position on the administrative ladder at the Academy, but she was also moonlighting as an assistant to her idol, Symboli Rudolf, who had moved on to be directly involved with the Japan Racing Association. Thus, it was through Rudolf and Teio’s brainstorming that Special Week had re-entered the world of racing - not participating, but rather in teaching.
Special Week was a testament to the difficulty that some horsegirls had in entering the racing world. While many were afforded the opportunities, advantages, and ability to compete for a spot at one of Japan’s prestigious running academies, there were still quite a few gaps that saw potential talent going unscouted, particularly in the rural areas of the country. It had only been through her mother’s hard work and Special Week’s own persistence that she had won admission to Tracen Academy nearly a decade prior, making all of her dreams come true.
Well, almost all.
Now, however, Spe was helping pass the torch to the next generation of racers. Each weekend, she would meet about a dozen or so young horsegirls from the local area, where she would provide them with oversight and advice on their running, something many of the girls would never have had access to due to the remote location and lack of support infrastructure. Quite frankly, Spe had just about assumed the role of a trainer for them at that point, even though she lacked the qualifications for it - it was only through the scouting program that the JRA had established that it had all come to pass, and Spe was able to help these girls achieve their dreams, just as she had years ago.
Leaving the door ajar with a doorstop as she headed inside, Special Week made a quick stop to the storeroom to fetch the supplies she would need for their day at the track. Two large jugs filled with water, along with an array of reusable plastic cups; bibs for races and spare shoes for those who needed to borrow theirs; training equipment ranging from pylons to agility ladders to medicine balls; and even some spare sunscreen, the early-June sun already packing a punch.
Slowly, the girls began to filter towards the vast field as they arrived, located behind the community centre where Spe was busy setting things up, the dirt track having been revitalized as part of the JRA’s investment into the scouting program. A re-done surface, new railings and bleachers, floodlights and a PA system - it was a far cry from the pockmarked, decrepit circuit Special Week had grown up running at.
As she finished setting up the water station, Spe caught sight of one girl in particular heading towards her, carrying a clipboard in her hands. “Good morning, Miss Spe…” The shy horsegirl greeted her, her messy dark brown hair looking as if she had just woken up as Dia Tesoro peered up at her through her large glasses. “Y-You left your clipboard inside, so….”
Spe smiled down at the girl, graciously taking the item from her. “Thank you very much, Tesoro. Did you have a good week?”
The girl seemed to perk up as Spe engaged with her, the shy filly taking a moment to find her words, tail twitching nervously behind her. “...I did. We had a field trip to a museum in Sapporo, and it was really interesting.”
Spe smiled, flipping through the pages on her clipboard until she reached a new blank page, jotting down the date. She’d use it to keep track of times for the day. “That’s fantastic! I’m super happy to hear that - are you ready to run lots today?”
Dia Tesoro shrugged her shoulders, still fixated with keeping her gaze on the ground. “I-I think so.”
“Well then why don’t you go warm up with everyone else, hmm?”
Tesoro seemed to wilt a little at her suggestion, the nervous horsegirl bravely nodding despite her natural anxiety. “O-Okay.”
Special Week watched her return to the group, the girl being welcomed back into the fold to join the others in their pre-training stretches. Out of the cohort, Dia Tesoro had proved to be one of the tougher girls to corral that year. Despite being the fastest of the bunch, the poor thing was also the most anxious about running - but once she was on the track, wind in her hair, it was as if that anxiety was channelled into something else entirely, allowing her to surge past the others and routinely win her match-ups when the time came for the girls to race together. Spe knew she had potential to be something special, she simply needed a bit of guidance to find her confidence - something she was all too familiar with herself.
Doing a mental headcount, the young horsewoman let the girls stretch and chat for a few minutes longer now that they had all arrived, instead focusing on her list of activities for the day. Stretches, three light laps to warm-up - then the rest of the morning was focused on agility training, intended to hone the girls’ reaction times and ability to navigate the field during a race. Speed was all well and good, but it meant nothing if you got a bad start or found yourself boxed-in and blocked by the pack. In the afternoon, after a lunch that would be supplied by a few of the parents, she would have the girls focus on gate training, practicing their race starts together.
Bringing her whistle to her lips, Spe gave it a sharp blow, the horsegirls instinctively darting over to stand before her, brimming with energy. “Alright, girls! Pair up with your pace partner, get out there for three laps. Take it easy!”
Sorting it out amongst themselves, the twelve girls split into six groups of two, Special Week having paired up the girls with one another at the beginning of the program’s season a few months prior. Slowly, the duos started off one at a time onto the track as instructed, a specific duo loitering in the back to wait for their turn to set off. Dia Tesoro looked rather meek as Sigur Ros threw an arm around the shorter girl, giving her a small shake. “Try to keep up!” The taller girl exclaimed, her cheery attitude rubbing off on Tesoro, who broke out in a smile and followed along as they started out.
Special Week smiled at the sight - she had specifically paired those two up as training partners for a reason. While Tesoro was a good deal faster, Sigur Ros had an infectious energy to her that had helped settle the other girl down with her anxieties and helped her tap into the joys of running. It had been working rather well, it seemed.
As the twelve girls began their days with a jog around the course, Special Week busied herself with setting up the last of the training equipment on the infield grass, eager for the day to come.
Holding her thumb against the button, Special Week paused for only a brief moment before pressing down. In an instant, the starter gates flung open with a simultaneous ring of the bell, sending the four runners off for their practice start.
Well, three of the runners. Dia Tesoro, Sigur Ros, and Iskios took off together, the first two starting strong while the third had a slight stumble to her start, putting her just behind. The fourth runner, however, failed to emerge entirely.
Ocean Stella cowered in her gate, crouched down low with her hands pressing her ears flat against her head to protect them. Wincing, the girl finally cracked open an eye as Special Week approached, taking a knee to meet the horsegirl. “Sorry…” Stella whispered out, still wincing. “It was really loud…”
It was the first time some of the girls were taking a start from the starting gate, the younger cohort of the group not having been introduced to the device before. Stella was one of them, and Spe smiled in understanding. “It's alright, Stella. Is it the bell that's too loud?”
“Yeah…”
Slowly helping the girl to her feet, an idea flashed in Special Week's mind. She had never ran with them during her career, but she had known a few racers with sensitive ears who had used ear covers when they ran - mostly to protect their ears from wind, but Spe knew the covers could also dampen sounds. “Come with me.”
Guiding Ocean Stella over to the collection of equipment on the side of the field, Special Week rifled through a bag of spare equipment, tossing aside extra running shoes and bibs before grabbing hold of what she was searching for. She gave the covers a quick look-over before handing them to Stella. “Try these out, they should help! just slip them on.”
Cautiously, the blonde-haired girl stretched one of the fabric covers over her equine ear, the appendage twitching a few times as it got used to the new sensation. The second cover followed, and the girl glanced around. “It's… Quieter?”
“Mhm! They're mostly used to block the wind, but they can help block out noisy distractions, too.” Spe explained, motioning for Stella to follow her back to the gate. “Want to give it another try?”
Stella nodded, having discovered a newfound sense of confidence thanks to her new gear. “Could I use the outside gate?” She asked, pointing towards the sixth gate, the one farthest from the bell located beside the first gate.
“Sure.” Spe agreed with a smile, turning to the rest of the girls. “Okay! I need three more of you to line up!”
In an instant, three girls hurried off to the gate to beat out the others, leaving a couple of eager runners pouting with crossed arms at having missed out on a spot. Special Week secured the first three girls in their gates, shutters locking closed behind them, then made for Stella's outside gate, giving the sensitive girl an encouraging smile.
Heading back to the first gate and ensuring the track was clear of the last group, Spe brought her thumb up to the starter button, waiting a few brief moments yet again.
The bell sounded and the gates flung open once more, this time all four girls sprinting out. Ocean Stella got a decent start, surging forward side-by-side with one of the other runners as they took off along the dirt turf for a quick sprint of only a few hundred meters. Special Week smiled to herself at the sight, turning to the rest of the group. “Four more, please!”
She made a mental note to track down a brand new pair of ear covers to get for Stella.
“Alright! Great work today, everyone. You're dismissed!”
A cheer went up through the group as the day came to a close, the horsegirls existing in varying states of tiredness. Sigur Ros seemed to be nearly boundless with her energy, while Empress Flame was all too happy that the day was over, thoroughly exhausted by the day's program.
Busying herself with tidying things up as the girls left to get changed and head home, Special Week smiled as she spotted Dia Tesoro pitching in to help out without being asked. The girl gathering up the scattered training equipment and walking it inside to the storeroom, Tesoro reappeared moments later to fetch yet more stray equipment, a serious expression on her face.
Dumping out the last of the water left in the refreshment containers, Special Week made quick work of it all thanks to Tesoro’s help, successfully leaving it all the way they had found it that morning - only for it to eventually be dragged back out the next morning for Sunday's practice. Thankfully, however, Sunday's were only half-days for them.
Doing one last look-through of the building before heading out, Special Week found Dia Tesoro waiting for her by the entrance, the horsegirl having elected to stay behind rather than head off with her friends for the evening. Her gaze downturned, the girls’ mood was inscrutable to Spe, who took time to lock-up the building before approaching the girl.
“Great work today, Tesoro!” Spe said as she approached, praising her. “You were so fast in that final heat!”
Tesoro just about panicked at the compliment, her ears pressing flat against her skull. “Th-Thank you, Miss Spe. I-It was a fluke, really…”
“Nonsense, you won because you gave it your all!” Spe was all too familiar with Tesoro’s line of thinking, the insecurity being something that has plagued her around that age as well. “You've been doing great lately.”
Her tail flicking from side to side in happiness, the bespectacled horsegirl clung to her bag, knuckles white from her grip. “U-Um, is it okay if we, um…”
“Of course!” Assuring the girl, Special Week spotted a small smile creep onto the filly’s lips, the two of them beginning to head off together. It had become routine for Spe to accompany the girl back to her home following the weekend practices, happy to entertain the girl’s questions. Tesoro had the natural talent to run, but she also had a very important component that was required to take things to the next level - the drive.
The two walked in silence for a few moments, Special Week enjoying the quiet after a day spent wrangling a dozen energetic horsegirls. She had been wary of taking on the job at first - Spe had never aspired to being anything like a trainer or coach during her career, and often found herself struggling when underclassmen had approached her to ask for advice or tips. Such a thing had always been Teio’s or McQueen’s strengths, with Spe left struggling to describe even basic concepts of her running. Despite that, though, she had taken it all on anyway, particularly after Teio had pitched it to her as ‘a way for us to find the next you!’
And perhaps they had, now.
“How did you find the gate training?” Spe asked aloud, taking the lead in starting up the conversation. Tesoro thought for a few moments, the girl always mindful of her words.
“I… Felt myself getting better at it towards the end.” She said, pushing up her glasses with a hand while the other nervously fiddled with the large braid she wore her hair in. “It's really something else…”
One of the biggest additions that had come with the track renovations was the donation of a six-gate starting gate - it seemed that Teio had remembered an old conversation herself and Spe had when they had first gotten to know each other at Tracen, concerning how Spe had never run a race that began in a starting gate. In her hometown, they simply lined-up and waited for a signal, as if it were a casual practice.
Now, however, the girls were able to practice their starts more effectively, and if they continued on with their racing careers, they wouldn't be caught off-guard by having to adapt to the gates like Special Week had been.
“I got pretty spooked my first time, too.” Spe let Tesoro in on a little secret, smiling at the girl. “I was so not used to it that I had a late start when the gates opened in my first race!”
“I guess that's why we're practicing…”
“Mhm! And you did a great job.”
Dia Tesoro was always gracious when Spe praised her, but the praise also very clearly embarrassed the poor horsegirl. “Thank you.” She said meekly.
“Have you been looking at your applications like I mentioned last week?” Continuing on, Spe kept the girl engaged as they walked along the sidewalk together, taking a slightly different path from that morning.
“Yes, I have been. I…” Tesoro sighed. “It's a lot, I'm not sure what I'm doing…”
“Heh, I remember that feeling. It felt like I was doing everything wrong when I was filling out those packages!” Recalling how her mom had helped her out with it all, Spe smiled ruefully at the memory of late nights spent writing essays and filling out information into form after form for different academies. “If you need help with it, I'd be happy to sit down someday soon with you and go over it.”
“Would that be okay? I-I know you're so busy…”
“Of course, Tesoro. It's what I'm here for!” Reaching out to ruffle the girl's hair, Spe did her best to support the prospective athlete and her dreams to run.
Descending into more chatter about the application process, Spe fielded a few more questions from the inquisitive horsegirl as they approached Tesoro’s house. Reaching the gateway to the property, Tesoro gave Special Week a deep bow. “Thank you, Miss Spe.” She said with a certain reverence, the girl having always been incredibly formal with Spe.
“Of course! I'll see you tomorrow, alright?” Waving goodbye, Special Week watched as Dia Tesoro slipped off and disappeared into the house, her tail still swaying in excitement. The happiness was infectious, too, and Spe felt her step being lighter than usual as she began to make for home.
Her mind wandering slightly towards the mystery of what would be for dinner - she hoped it was something hearty, training days always worked up quite the appetite - Special Week was shocked out of her revelry by a vibrating and chiming coming from her bag. Panicking slightly, she realized at that moment that she hadn't peeked at her phone for the entire day, having been too preoccupied with the girls to even have the time to remember.
Scrambling to answer the call, she caught sight of the text ‘Teio!’ on the screen as the phone rang in her hand.
“Hello!?”
“Spe! Hey! How's it going?”
“Just finished up the training day, heh.” She replied, standing on the sidewalk and glancing around. She could chat briefly, but she'd have to be off soon to get home. “It went really well! We did gate training today-”
“Ugh, that was always the worst…” Teio interjected, audibly sighing through the phone. “I'm glad it went well, though… And it's actually why I'm calling.”
“Oh?”
“Yeah, you see- Hold on a sec.” Teio suddenly stopped talking, and Spe listened as it sounded like her friend was shouting at someone away from the phone, only to return moments later. “Sorry, busy day here! Like I was saying, um…” She trailed off.
“Something about gate training…?”
“Yes! Well, I mean, not exactly. Just training in general, but still.” Special Week smirked, Teio still as rambly and energetic as always. “I found out about something pretty interesting today, sorta last minute kind of deal. I wanted to reach out to you about it beforehand.”
“Oh? What is it?”
“For the record, this wasn't my idea. I think it even came from above Prez- I mean, from above Rudolf. One of the JRA board members or something - so no repeating this to anyone, it hasn't been announced yet.”
“Of course, yeah.” Special Week felt her tail jitter with curiosity, Teio taking her sweet time to get to her point.
“They're organizing some sort of meet-and-greet tour with one of the JRA’s premiere racers, have her make some stops across the country at the different scouting programs to meet all the girls. Something to do with raising interest and all that.”
“...Right! Does that include Hidaka?” Special Week asked, immediately taking to the idea. The girls frequently chatted - and sometimes bickered - over races and racers at the highest level, idolizing the best of the best and keeping up with the news. She recalled how most of them had been totally star-struck when Rudolf and Teio had shown up to help inaugurate the club the year prior. Even Spe herself continued to deal with horsegirls that were as much fans of her as they were racers, Tesoro no exception to that.
“It does, which is why I wanted to call.” Teio's chipper voice took on a sudden seriousness, one that caused a sense of unease to creep onto Spe. The woman on the phone sighed. “No easy way to say this to you, but the racer doing the meet-and-greet is going to be Suzuka.”
Time and space contracted around Special Week as she heard that name, the horsewoman taking a step sideways to lean against the nearby fence for support. Her ears rang, her breath caught. She struggled to hear Teio’s voice as her mind began to run away with itself, panic beginning to claw away at her from the fringes.
“I wanted to give you a heads-up, because, y'know…”
“Thank you.” Special Week choked out, feeling weak in the knees.
“They haven't announced it yet, but I have the schedule here and she'll be in Hidaka next weekend to kick it all off. We're starting in Hokkaido since most of the new programs are there.”
Special Week wanted to throw up. She wanted to spike her phone into the ground and forget everything Teio had just said. She wanted to run, and run, and run until she couldn't run anymore and-
“Spe? Are you there?”
“Yeah.”
“I'm sorry.”
Special Week's mind had locked itself onto distant, painful memories she had buried away for years, ripping those scars open with a reckless abandonment to unleash those feelings and emotions onto her once again. Long nights spent crying herself to sleep alone, hating herself for everything she had done. Endless weeks of morose and dejection as she grappled with so much, so, so much. Retreating away back home, giving up-
“I need to go, Teio.”
“Call me if you need me, okay? And if-”
She hung up before Teio could finish, her mind too frantic to care. Stress tore at her chest, her lungs straining to suck in air and push it back out as the panic took hold. She needed, she needed-
Pressing her phone back up to her ear, she grit her teeth as it rang once, twice-
“Spe, how-”
“Mom, can you come pick me up in town?”
Silence for a moment. “Spe? What's wrong?”
“Please come pick me up.” She strained out, well-aware of how warbly her voice sounded as she continued to grapple with her panic. Giving her mom her location, Spe felt her body flash hot, then instantly flash cold in response, her tail panickedly thumping against the ground as she came to sit on the sidewalk, unable to continue standing.
“I'll be there in ten minutes.”
The line went dead and Spe fought to breathe, the world around her completely tuned out. There, alone on the sidewalk, the horsewoman hyperventilated, one word - one name - repeating itself in her head no matter how hard she tried to push it away.