Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

Robert woke up slower than usual. It took him a minute to be fully conscious and aware. Even then, he was confused about where he was. He was lying on a comfortable mattress for once, so he clearly didn’t sleep in the plastic chair in his apartment. And if that wasn’t enough of a clue, there was a very warm body behind him and an arm around his waist. Fuck.

He wasn’t so drunk yesterday as to not remember what happened. He didn’t have to open his eyes to understand where he was and with whom. Alcohol and blacking out were not to blame. The drinking might have contributed to his current situation, but in the end it was all on him and his bad decisions.

It’s not like his attraction to men was new. He didn’t explore it often. Sure, he has given a few blowjobs here and there and never had any complaints. But his life as Mecha Man didn’t really give him much space for anything else. When it came to relationships, he defaulted to women. Not for any real or significant reason, it usually just sort of happened. He rarely, if ever, pursued anyone. Instead he ended up with whomever approached him. And that tended to be women. It’s not like those relationships lasted either. The secrecy, odd hours and not putting his partners as his priority ruined any chance of that. The point was, waking up next to a man might have been unusual, but the real issue was the specific man he spent the night with.

Flambae was an annoying and insufferable dick. A criminal he fought and busted a few years ago. A man who liked to set fires just so he could then put them out and stay on top of the SDN leader board. At the top of the z-team at least. An arrogant bully with anger issues. Except that wasn’t all he was. Robert wouldn’t even consider sleeping with Flambae if that was all there was to him.

In the time he spent dispatching for the z-team, he saw way more in Flambae. While he tried to appear as a confident badass, he was kind of a loser himself. The man kept muttering to mostly himself on comms. Some of his insults (like food thrower awayer) were so lame that Robert wanted to laugh. Well, not at first, but later after he got over his anger that Flambae was bullying Waterboy. He also learned why the man was so on edge that day. It turned out the car Phenomaman destroyed was his. That and Waterboy throwing away his lunch was not an excuse for being a dick, but it did make sense for him to be angry. Robert felt slightly bad for throwing Blazer’s spaghetti at him.

Flambae was also clearly good with kids, especially his niece. And apparently a good cook, if he was to be believed. Robert was still undecided if he thought it was true, Flambae had a habit of describing himself as perfect at everything during their shifts. Especially after successful missions. The bragging got less annoying after Robert figured out pairing him with Prism on missions tended to go better and the conversations were more bearable. Endearing, even. Not as endearing as walking in on Flambae badly singing in the locker room. All of these tiny details showed Flambae in a better light. He was still a dick, but unfortunately Robert was kind of into that.

And okay, he was also physically attracted to the man. He was 6 '4 of pure muscle and spent most of his time walking around in a spandex suit that left nothing to the imagination and had a V so deep it went down to his waist. Robert was just human.

All that combined with his bitchy attitude was doing it for Robert. Sue him. Not everyone liked their partners nice and agreeable. If he did, he’d probably do something about the constant flirting Blonde Blazer was throwing his way. And he would not be in this mess.

—---------------------

Last night the entire team went to the Crypto Night bar. Well, everyone except for Punch Up, who had a “thing”. Robert didn’t want to know. They even invited Waterboy. That was a pleasant surprise.

Robert was concerned either he or Flambae would get thrown out. But the bartender didn’t recognize him and running around with your face on fire apparently didn’t get you kicked out, as opposed to just sitting there minding your business, only throwing vodka into someone’s face when they tried to start a fight. It wasn’t fair.

Despite Crypto Night being a superhero bar, nobody batted an eye at a SND dispatcher. They were probably close enough to qualify.

The night went surprisingly well all things considered. Most of the team somewhat warmed up to Waterboy and nobody was bullying him anymore. He did mostly just awkwardly stand around the group and listened to the others, but he did join the conversation sometimes. And not only with Robert, but the others as well. That was definitely progress.

Robert was pretty sure he saw Sonar do lines in the bathroom, but that was none of his business. Malevola was already on his case about it, they were quietly arguing. Invisigal and Golem spent most of the night discussing their dating life, laughing at other people’s dating profiles and the videogames they were playing. Prism ended up joining them when they switched the topic to their favourite music artists, which was when it all went to shit.

Since Flambae spent most of the night glued to Prism’s side, he was now left alone. And of course he had to pick Robert of all people to pester.

While Robert was warming up to his team and was enjoying the night, he wasn’t used to socializing for so long. He found a secluded corner where he stood, leaning against the wall and nursing a beer. And that’s where Flambae found him. After being called a bitch for only drinking beer, Robert got into an unspoken drinking match with the man. Why he thought he could outdrink someone several inches taller and more muscular than him was a mystery. He clearly wasn’t thinking straight at that point.

His inevitable horrible fate of passing out, getting alcohol poisoning and probably being thrown in the dumpster again was averted by an argument that started between them. Flambae went on his regular bragging tirade about his place on the leader board. If Robert didn’t know better, it almost seemed like he was looking for praise or at least acknowledgement. When faced with the reminder that Robert was well aware that Flambae was starting fires just so he could put them out to get points, Flambae got heated. This escalated when Robert brought up that the other man only seemed to care about his points and not helping people. That clearly touched a nerve and Flambae lashed out.

He pushed Robert into the wall with a hand clutching the collar of his shirt. Flambae also stepped closer, freezing in his movement when they were only inches apart. He was intently staring at Robert, his eyes sparkling with anger. Robert’s breath quickened in anticipation of either a fist to his face or something else. His bet was on the punch. A few seconds passed and then Flambae slowly stepped impossibly closer, their bodies now flush together. Robert was well aware they weren’t alone, but he could not find it in himself to care.

Flambae kept staring at him with the same anger, but his gaze flickered to Robert’s lips. When he looked back up, Robert gave him a hesitant nod.

That was all it took. Flambae didn’t waste time, he immediately went for Robert’s lips. The kiss did not start out gentle. He smashed their mouths together like a man starving. He immediately went to bite Robert’s lower lip, making the other man yelp and slightly open his mouth. The sound was muffled by Flambae’s own lips and the man immediately took advantage of the situation and pushed his tongue in. He pressed his entire body into Robert, putting one hand on his waist and the other in his hair, both tightly gripping. He had enough leverage to pull Robert up, forcing him to step on his tiptoes.

Robert was conflicted. While he was enjoying what was happening, he was also still pissed at Flambae and he was not happy about the treatment he was getting. If Flambae thought he would just meekly take it, he was wrong. He was just about to do something about it, when the same bartender who threw him out as Mecha Man came over and shouted at them to get out of his bar. Public indecency seemed to be on the list of offences that get you thrown out of Crypto Night. Banned, too.

They quickly got out of the bar. The next minutes were honestly a blur to Robert. He just remembered getting into Flambae’s (now repaired) car and agreeing to go to his place.

After that, he remembers them barely making it behind closed doors before latching onto each other again and making out. He remembers pushing Flambae onto the bed and getting on top of him. He remembers them grinding together while trying to take off their clothes, and failing miserably because they just kept kissing and refused to let go. There were hands, both his and Flambae’s, exploring the newly uncovered skin and traveling down between their bodies. He remembers those hands gripping his and Flambae’s cocks and working them together. They stopped kissing at some point and instead Robert started to trail kisses down Flambae’s neck, taking his time to gently bite the flawless skin. Flambae’s responding moans encouraged him to continue the trail down to his chest. It didn’t take them long to finish, cum spilling between them and staining their stomachs.

When they were done, Robert was too tired to care. If he was thinking clearly he would leave. But instead he ended up just rolling over and staying the night. And unbeknown to him, becoming the little spoon during the night.

Which brings Robert to his current situation. While last night was definitely enjoyable, it was also a massive mistake. He would love nothing more than to get up and silently leave, pretending nothing happened. But his plans were foiled by the vice grip Flambae had on his waist.

He looked around and saw Flambae’s clock on the nightstand. Shit. They went out drinking on a Thursday, meaning they needed to get to work. And by the looks of it, they didn’t have a lot of time. He had no idea where Flambae lived and how long it would take them to get to the SDN office.

Well, no time like the present. He could freak out later. His job was more important than whatever awkwardness he was about to experience.

Too bad, he had to admit that lying there in someone’s arms felt…nice. Cozy. Not a feeling he was used to. Under different circumstances, he would not be opposed to enjoying it if he had the time.

“Flambae.” He tried to see if that would wake the other man up, but there was no reaction.

“Flambae!” He said louder, while also tapping the arm around his waist.

The other man started to stir, and in the process squeezed Robert tighter to himself.

“5 more minutes.” He mumbled.

“Flambae, get up. We don’t have 5 more minutes, we need to get to work. I don’t want to get fired yet.”

That seemed to wake Flambae up. He slowly sat up on the bed, rubbing his eyes and stretching his arms. He then looked at Robert.

“Good morning, sunshine. Did you sleep well?” He asked, a smirk appearing on his face.

Robert sighed. He could already tell Flambae would be insufferable about this. “Sure, better than ever, cupcake.” he responded, making sure to put enough sarcasm into the pet name. “Where is your shower? I can’t go to work like this. Ugh, this is disgusting." He touched the dried cum on his stomach.

Flambae’s smirk widened. “Second door on the left. You want some company?”

“Absolutely not. No offence, but I think yesterday was a bad enough decision. I don’t need a repeat.” Robert got up, found his clothes scattered on the floor and headed out to the shower. He shot a glance at Flambae before he left the room, only to see that he was no longer smirking. Instead he was just blankly staring into space. Weird. Maybe the regret finally crept up to him as well. Robert was definitely regretting everything.

—---------------------
Flambae didn’t live far from the office, they managed to get to work on time even with them both taking showers. The ride from Flambae’s apartment was filled with awkward silence, but that was to be expected. What are you supposed to talk about with your annoying co-worker after a one night stand?

Robert sat at his desk and hoped that would be the end of this. He made a bad decision, but no need to dwell on it or be weird about it.

That would, of course, be too good to be true.

“So…” Prism’s voice cut the silence on the channel. “Are we going to talk about what happened yesterday?”

Nobody responded so she continued.

“Seriously? Nothing to say for yourselves, lovebirds?”

Oh no. Robert didn’t like where this was going.

“Lovebirds?” Punch up perked up. “What did I miss yesterday? You skip one trip to the pub and something interesting happens, ay? “

“You didn’t miss anything, Punch up. Prism is just imagining things.” Robert spoke, knowing that his protest would probably put the spotlight directly on him. But there was also no one else she could realistically be talking about. Apart from Punch up (who wasn’t there yesterday) and Coupè, the rest of the z-team were strictly friends. Sonar would probably jump on the chance to hook up with anything with boobs, but none of the girls on the team would touch him with a ten foot pole. He was the only new addition that disrupted their dynamic. Well him and Waterboy, but as much as he liked the kid, he doubted anyone from the z-team wanted to fuck him.

“Imagining things, sure. Did I imagine Flambae’s tongue in your throat when he was groping you against the wall? Because I’ve had weirder fantasies, but I’m pretty sure that actually happened".

Fuck. Robert didn’t think she saw that. They were technically in the same bar, but in a far corner that should have been outside of the view of his team. He thought maybe Prism saw them leave the bar together and made assumptions. He could probably talk his way out of that. But fuck, he could not talk his way out of a full on make out session.

“Shite, really?” Punch up sounded surprised. “I thought they hated each other.”

“Clearly you know nothing about passion.” Flambae joined in, not sounding embarrassed at all. “Hate makes for the best sex. Lets you really take it out on the other person. There is nothing better than to…”

“OKAY, I think we heard enough.” Robert quickly jumped in. “Do I have to remind you that these conversations are recorded? This team is already one massive HR violation waiting to happen.”

“Touchy. Sounds like it went further than just making out. I want to know the details. You wouldn’t hold out on me, would you Flambae?” Prism teased.

“You say one word and I will cut your dick off and feed it to you.” Robert warned.

“Kinky. But what do you want me to do? She’s my best friend, we tell each other everything.” Flambae responded.

“You can tell her whatever the fuck you want in person. But you say one word on this channel and I will make sure that’s the last thing you ever say.”

“Wow Robbie, that is the kind of passion I’m talking about. But okay, I get it. No sex talk on the comms.”

“Good. Now can we get to work? Vanderstenk is requesting a security detail and I need one of you there ASAP.” Robert knew this probably wasn’t over, but the team surprisingly behaved for most of the shift. There were some mishaps here and there, but mostly the team did solid work.

That was until the morning shift was almost over. At this point Robert had a false sense of security and was not prepared for what he heard on the open channel.

"I could do so much better, you know? He has a flat ass, small dick, and looks like a starved alley cat that will fight you for scraps. He definitely fought someone, his whole body is just bruises and scars." There was a small pause. Robert should have said something to put a stop to it, but he was too stunned to speak. Apparently so was everyone else, so Flambae just continued. "But he also looks adorable when he cums, the noises he makes are incredible and it feels really nice to hold him. I shouldn't even be into that annoying bossy bitch. But I can't help it. I want to take him home, feed his skinny normie ass a home cooked meal, lick every single scar and then fuck him into the mattress until he cries and hold him so he stays the night. It's really fucking annoying."

"Oh shit." Prism was the one to break the stunned silence.

That got Robert over the initial shock. "Flambae, what the fuck did I say about this? While I'm sure everyone here appreciates knowing that I have a small dick, this goes above and beyond a HR violation. Why the fuck would you say any of that on an open channel?"

To his credit, Flambae actually sounded surprised when he responded. "Wait, what? What do you mean open channel, I was just talking to Prism. Bob Bob, please tell me everyone did not just hear that."

"My bad." Prism chimed in. "I thought he would say something embarrassing and it would be hilarious, I didn't think he had it that bad. It's pathetic."

This time Flambae sounded like he was trying to be angry but it mostly just came off as embarrassed. "Are you fucking kidding me? Why would you...? Can't fucking trust anybody. I'm going to set every single one of your wigs on fire, you bitch. See if I ever tell you anything again."

"Perfect." Robert said in a flat tone that he hoped conveyed his annoyance. "Well, I do not have the capacity to deal with this shit today, so I'm just going to pretend this didn't happen. I know I'm asking for the impossible here, but if you could all at least try to do the same, I would appreciate it."

Even as he was saying it, he did not believe for a second they would. And his suspicions were immediately confirmed by a chorus of responses, the z-team finally joining the conversation.

"Not a chance."

"Not happening."

"Where's the fun in that?"

"Yeah, no."

They all spoke over each other.

Finally Coupè's voice cut through the rest. "So how small are we talking? Like just below average or a full on micro dick?"

Robert put his face into his hands, rubbed his eyes and sighed.

"I only saw him in his underwear but let's just say I didn't see an outline at all." Invisigal responded. "Thank god I only ever saw him actually naked in a dream, pretty sure I was way too generous when imagining his dick."

"Ok, I think that's enough." Robert was so done with this bullshit. "I'm taking an early lunch. Get it out of your system while I'm gone and start acting like adults on the next shift."

He was about to take off his headset when he heard Flambae start talking again.

"Come on, guys. Stop it. His dick isn't that small. I just meant it isn't big. It's fine. Normal sized. He probably couldn't do porn, but you wouldn't throw him out of your bed if you wanted to have a one night stand and saw what he was packing."

Well, nice to know that Flambae thought his dick was "fine". A real confidence booster. And fuck Invisigal, it's not like he was wearing tight briefs that would show everyt...you know what? He was focusing on the wrong things. They could all believe he had the smallest dick on the planet as long as they stopped talking about it on a recorded channel. And more importantly as long as he didn’t have to listen to them.

"Well clearly you didn't throw him out" Prism added jokingly. "You sure it was a one night stand, though? It sounds like his tiny dick was good enough to make you want more.I think we’re focusing too much on Roberto’s junk and not enough on the sappy bullshit that came out of your mouth. You wanna cuddle him the whole night, huh?"

Aaand that was Robert's cue to actually take off his headset and go for lunch. He didn't need to hear what Flambae would say to that, especially since they all thought he left already. He was absolutely not tempted to listen in. Not at all. The thing with Flambae was already bad enough. It would be a terrible idea to explore whatever they had. Even no strings attached sex would probably end up badly, but anything more than that would be catastrophic. Especially because Flambae had no idea he was Mecha Man and they had history. And not a good one. Robert would maintain that Flambae was to blame for their fight and its outcome. He was the one who set the fire. Robert gave him a chance to peacefully surrender. They did not have to fight at all. But he doubted the ex villain would see it that way. He would undoubtedly blame Robert for both his arrest and missing fingers. Well, and his burnt off eyebrows as well.

Robert had no idea how Flambae didn’t put 2 and 2 together yet. Even Waterboy seemed to figure it out after 1 day. It didn’t take a genius. His voice sounded exactly the same and the mask of his costume didn’t hide that much when he was out of the Mecha suit. It was fine for the general public, but not really foolproof for someone who got close-ish to him and then spent a lot of time listening to his voice. Besides, it was common knowledge most dispatchers were retired heroes. So Mecha Man retires and a guy who fits his general appearance, sounds exactly the same, doesn’t seem to have powers and is all bruised and scarred up shows up as a dispatcher? Yeah, not that difficult to figure out. Robert was also reasonably sure Flambae, as annoying as he was, didn’t get drinks or food thrown at his face that often. And Robert already did that in and out of costume.

So even if Robert ignored all the other reasons why starting something with Flambae was a bad idea, him being Mecha Man was enough. Once Flambae found out, he would be pissed. Lying (or omitting the truth, same difference) wasn’t really a good foundation for a relationship. And while Robert could just tell him the truth now, he didn’t want to. They just started somewhat getting along and stopped being hostile. As illogical as it was, he didn’t want to ruin it. Even if he knew that the longer it would take for Flambae to find out, the worse the reaction would be.

Chapter Text

Robert felt better after lunch. He had time to clear his head and think things through. It also helped that Chase showed up and brought Beef. The little dog did wonders for his mood.

“Thank you for watching him yesterday, Chase. And I’m sorry I didn’t pick him up in the morning. I got drunk and overslept, I barely made it to work.” Robert said, picking up Beef. The dog happily licked his face in greeting.

“No problem, kid. I will happily watch this little guy any time. In fact, I might not give him back.” Chase waved his hand in dismissal. “You think I’m joking,” he continued after seeing Robert laugh. “But I assure you, I’m fucking serious.”

Robert smiled. “Noted. But be prepared that if you steal my dog, I’ll put on whatever prototype suit Royd has ready and come get him. Or maybe I’ll just wait until you die of old age. It shouldn’t take long.”

“Very funny, fucker. Get some new fucking material, the old jokes are getting…well old.”

They looked at each other and both failed to hold the laugh in.

“As much as I’m enjoying making fun of you, I need to go. My shift is about to start.” Robert said.

“How’s the team doing? You ready to cut them all yet? You already lasted longer than anyone expected, nobody would blame you.” Chase gave Robert a serious look.

“As tempting as that sounds right now, you know I’m not going to do that.” Robert answered. “They are actually doing really well. They finally began working as a team instead of sabotaging each other. They don’t bully Waterboy on every call anymore. I think they even started respecting me as their leader. Not so much as a person.” He sighed thinking about the conversation from this morning. “Either way, they mostly listen to what I tell them to do on missions.”

“So the assholes are doing the bare minimum. Great.” Chase said sarcastically. “And what’s that about them not respecting you as a person? I sense a story there.”

“You don’t want to know, trust me. It’s personal. It’s also mostly harmless, it will not affect our work. At least not until someone overhears us and reports our entire team to HR.”

“You’re right. I don’t want to know.” Chase confirms. “Plausible deniability or some shit. Just let me know if it gets out of hand, aight?”

“You got it. Now I really have to go, though.” Robert picked up Beef and brought him to his desk. He scratched him behind the ears and put him on the dog bed. Time to get to work.

—---------------------
He was actually dreading his afternoon shift. He didn’t know what went on while he was on break and if he should be ready for more jokes at his expense. He calmed down during his break, but was not looking forward to more humiliation. Whatever, he just needed to survive the next couple of hours and then he would be free for two whole days.

He did ask Royd if they would be working on the Mecha suit over the weekend, but that was shut down pretty quick. While he was more than willing to sacrifice his weekend, it seemed Royd wasn’t. Which was completely fair. Robert was just so used to Mecha Man consuming his entire life, he didn’t even consider that this could change.

God, he couldn’t remember the last time he had a free weekend. His stay in the hospital didn’t count, he was in a coma for most of it. But before? Every single day was spent in the suit. There were no weekends or vacations. There were always people who needed help, and he could help. How do you justify taking a break if you could be saving lives instead?

Right now he was useless without the suit. And he could not work on it alone. He was not his dad and he was not Royd. He might have learned to take care of the suit over the last 15 years, he repaired it by himself all the time. But he was not confident that he could rebuild it from scratch. And he definitely couldn’t rebuild the Astral Pulse.

He asked around the SDN office, but there were dedicated weekend shifts. He wasn’t needed. So he would actually take a break.

Jesus, what would he even do? He didn’t really have any hobbies. He could probably take Beef to the park. Maybe go buy a new mattress. Why did he even put his old one in the dumpster so he could throw Toxic out of his balcony without killing him, when he didn’t end up doing it? Well it was old and disgusting anyway. He needed a new one. He couldn’t sleep in his chair forever. And he had to admit that he hasn’t slept as well as last night in a while. Some part of it was probably the orgasm and maybe even the presence of another person, but most of it was definitely the mattress.

He could figure that out later. He already postponed the inevitable long enough. Time to put on his headset.

Surprisingly, the shift started out normal. No dick jokes or inappropriate discussions. Well, at least none at his expense. Robert doubted a shift with the z-team was possible without any inappropriate jokes.

But either his team took his words to heart and started acting like adults (not likely), they got bored of making fun of him (also doubtful), or this was the silence before the storm and they were getting ready for something big.

Robert kept waiting for the other shoe to drop, only it never did. His team of ex villains were on their best behaviour. Sure, Punch up and Coupé ended up fighting in an underground ring they were supposed to shut down. Malevola sliced a car in half with her sword after its owner catcalled her. Sonar unintentionally transformed on a call to get a cat out of a tree and scared not only the cat but about 20 kids that were having a birthday party. Golem didn’t really do anything, he was just sitting in the park listening to music, but a cyclist who wasn’t paying attention crashed into him and thought Golem was attacking him and trying to absorb him. Invisigal used her powers to steal cigarettes from a teenager’s back pocket only to immediately trip and scatter them everywhere. Waterboy was clearly getting better control over his powers and only managed to create a hazardous puddle once in the entire shift. Unfortunately both Malevola and Punch up managed to slip in it and get injured. But they didn’t even sound that mad about it.

This was model behavior as far as his team was concerned. The only people who were suspiciously without accidents were Flambae and Prism. They seemed to be over their fight, Prism’s wig wasn’t even slightly scorched and Flambae clearly forgave her for her morning stunt with the comms. Robert sent them on most calls together as always. It could have been a coincidence that they were the only team with no accidents. But it was unlikely. There was not a single suspicious fire the entire shift. Robert hoped they felt bad and went out of their way to not cause trouble to get on his good side.

“That was the last call for today. Good job everyone. Keep it up and maybe we won’t be the worst performing team in SDN anymore.” Robert said into his headset.

“Wow. That wasn’t condescending at all.” Malevola’s voice was heavy with sarcasm.

“Yeah, good way to make it sound like a compliment and then remind us we are the worst.” Invisigal joined in. “You need to work on your motivational speeches.”

“Last time he wanted to motivate us, he called us burnt piles of shit. Anything is an improvement over that.” that was Flambae. He probably still felt salty over Robert saying that it especially applied to him. In his defence, he was still mad at him at the time.

“Ok, I get it. I suck at motivational speeches. But seriously, good job, guys. We’re finally getting over the burnt shit phase. Soon enough every one of you will be a majestic Phoenix if you keep this up. I’m proud of you.” Robert meant every single word he said. The difference between where they started and where they were now was night and day.

“You should get laid more often if this is how you talk to us after, lad. Especially after the shite we gave you in the morning.” and there it was. Robert didn’t expect Punch up to be the first one to bring it up, but he wasn’t surprised someone did.

“Did I not tell you to leave him the fuck alone?” Flambae’s response was surprising. Was this the reason everyone behaved and there were no more comments?

“Jaysus, I didn’t even say anything bad.” Punch up defended himself.

“It’s fine.” Robert decided that addressing the issue would be better than ignoring it and hoping for the best. “I can handle a few comments and I don’t expect you to completely watch your mouth around me. That being said, this morning was out of control. I understand you will gossip about me no matter what. And I handed you something to gossip about on a silver platter. But I feel like what happened this morning was a little over the line. Especially what you did, Prism. I get that you just wanted to embarrass your BFF, but I think that backfired and what we heard was a little too personal. I doubt anyone here would be okay with a similar conversation of theirs being public.” Robert heard a quiet murmur from the others, it sounded like they begrudgingly agreed. “I would also appreciate less comments about my dick if possible.” he switched to a more joking tone. “You guys are going to give me a complex.”

“Don’t worry about it, Robert. It’s not about the size, but about how you use it.” Coupé chimed in. “And I’m talking from experience, so you can trust me.”

“I call bullshit.” That was Sonar. “Everyone knows that’s not true, you just say that to guys with small dicks to make them feel better. Nobody ever wishes the guy they are fucking had a smaller dick.”

Robert barely suppressed a laugh. While they were back to discussing dicks, this seemed less hostile than their morning teasing.

“Are you talking about the leprechaun, Coop?” Malevola asked, ignoring Sonar. Several laughs could be heard in the background.

“Oi. If you want to insult me, get better material. Leprechaun is the lowest hanging fruit you could go for.” Punch up defended himself.

“I don’t hear you deny the small dick allegations.” Invisigal joined in.

Robert was losing his composure. But he would not laugh.

“I also said it’s about how you use it. And trust me, he can use it.” Coupé basically purred into the comm.

“Okay, TMI. It’s not fun when you’re not embarrassed. It defeats the entire purpose.” Prism spoke up.

“I still call bullshit.” Sonar argued. “If you ever get tired of fucking an oompa-loompa, you know where to find me.”

“In your dreams.” Coupé did not seem bothered at all.

“Baby, I dream about you every night.” Sonar didn’t miss a beat to respond.

“And I think that’s a good place to end this, people. We need to fine tune what’s okay to share and what isn’t.” Robert jumped in before the discussion could get even more off the rails. “And we also need to hope no one ever listens to these recordings, because we would all get fired. Enjoy your weekend, see you all on Monday.”

Robert saw everyone go offline. Well everyone but Flambae. He also saw a request for a private channel call.

“You know, just because it’s just the two of us does not mean it’s not recorded. It still is. So whatever you want to say better be work related.” Robert said before Flambae could start talking.

“After today, I think that ship has sailed. If anyone ever listens to these we are all fucked.” Flambae responded.

“Good point. So what do you want?”

Flambae hesitated. “I wanted to talk about what you heard me say. When I thought I was just talking to Prism. And I wanted to apologize. I really didn’t know she was broadcasting it. I didn’t want anyone to hear. I was just talking shit to my friend.”

Robert had to admit, he was surprised. He did not expect to ever hear Flambae apologize. “That’s fine. I know I threatened you not to talk about it, but I know you didn’t do it on purpose. We’re fine.”

“Are we? You were not meant to hear, but you did. I wanted to make sure nothing I said will cause issues between us.”

“I was not meant to hear it, so I’m just going to pretend I didn’t.” Robert was a goddamn liar. How could you hear someone say what Flambae did and then look them in the eye? He was usually pretty immune to this sort of stuff. He took it in stride when Invisigal told him she had a wet dream about him or asked him if he jerks off in the Mecha suit. But that was different. Less real. When the guy you slept with says he wants to lick every scar on your body and fuck you, there is implied intent to actually do it. And Robert had to stop thinking about that ASAP.

“It’s not how I would prefer to say it, but it’s out there now. I’d like to know how you feel about it.” So Flambae would not just let it go. Great.

“Which part? That you could do better than my flat ass? I mean you’re probably not wrong. And while the dick comment hurts, that probably isn’t wrong either.” Robert tried his best to deflect.

“Those are the parts you want to focus on? Not the rest of the things I said?”

“Yup. Pretty much.” Please just let it go.

Flambae sighed. “If you’re not interested, you can just say that. I probably came on too strong with the whole… ‘fucking you until you cry’ speech.”

“You also called me an annoying bitch. Real mixed signals. I don’t know what to think.”

“You’re hilarious.” Flambae said deadpan. “How about we start with the home cooked meal and see where that goes? Come over tomorrow. I’m an excellent cook.”

“And humble, too.”

“Fuck you, Robert.”

“Not on the first date.”

Flambae’s frustrated groan was worth it. “I think I changed my mind. You’re too annoying.” There was a pause. “No but really, come over tomorrow.”

“Look, Flambae, I know that saying ‘it’s not you, it’s me’ is cliché. But trust me, it’s me. My situation is messy. And whatever this is would make it messier. Not just for me, but for both of us.”

“That’s all you’re going to give me? No details?”

Robert stayed silent.

“Ok, Robert. I’m not going to pry. Think it over. If you change your mind, text me tomorrow. I don’t mind messy.“

“I don’t even have your number.”

“Yes you do. Invisibitch sneaked it into your phone earlier today. Pretty sure she gave you all of our numbers.”

Chapter Text

Robert woke up with a crick in his neck and sore muscles. Lately he always did. It wasn’t a mystery why. After getting injured when his suit blew up, months of being in a coma that caused serious muscle atrophy, and then immediately getting beat up again, the last thing he should be doing was sleeping in a plastic chair. The ground probably would be a better choice. But here he was. 

He looked over at Beef, who was still sleeping. At least the little dog had a comfy bed. 

Robert managed to get up and stretch a little. He hoped a hot shower would get rid of some of the tension. 

No matter how shitty his apartment was, the water heater never betrayed him and neither did the water pressure. To be fair, his apartment wasn’t the problem. He actually lived in a pretty nice building. The depressing state of it was all on him. He called it ‘minimalism’ to Royd, but the truth of the matter was just that he never spent enough time there to care. He usually just came in to sleep. 

He turned on the shower, took off his boxers, and went in. The spray of hot water was an immediate relief. He preferred his showers scorching — right on the edge of too hot to handle. He could feel the muscles in his shoulders and neck relaxing like magic. He just stood there for what felt like hours, not really doing anything, just enjoying the feeling of the water hitting his skin. 

When he had the time, this was one of his favourite things to do. He usually also let his thoughts wander. That could sometimes turn dangerous. 

He tried his best to compartmentalize at work, keeping cool and focused on his job. That didn’t mean he was as unaffected as he would like to be. 

He obviously felt some type of way about what Flambae said about him when he thought Robert couldn’t hear. And no, he doesn’t mean the part about his flat ass. He also wasn’t too bothered about being called an annoying bossy bitch. After all, he called Flambae  an annoying and insufferable dick in his head. If he had a BFF to gossip with, he would probably use those exact words out loud to describe the man. 

The closest thing he had to friends were probably Chase and Royd, who he could not imagine on the receiving end of his bitching about how annoyingly hot (pun intended) he thought Flambae was. Well, he could actually. Chase would tell him to get a fucking grip and Royd would be awkwardly supportive. Invisigal would probably be his best bet, but she would also not hesitate to share everything he told her with the z-team. 

But back on topic. Obviously what affected Robert most were the parts he didn’t want to discuss with Flambae yesterday. 

The fucking part, while making Robert blush when he thought about it, was fine. Obviously Flambae wanted to fuck him. Not because Robert thought he was that irresistible, but the night after the bar was enough of a clue that Flambae probably found him attractive, even if he thought he could do better. Their night together did not lack passion, even if they were drunk. 

He could also maybe write off the part about the noises he made and how he looked when he came. It was a little more telling, but still could just be about the sex itself. 

No, the real reason he was in trouble was the rest of that speech. While Flambae jumped on the opportunity to say that hate was good for passionate sex, you do not want to hold someone you hate in your arms for the entire night ‘so they don’t leave’. Typically you don’t want to feed them your cooking either, unless you are a terrible cook. 

Robert could also sympathize with finding it annoying to be drawn to someone you probably shouldn’t be. 

That was the root of the issue. If Flambae was into him, but he didn’t reciprocate, it would be simple. But it wasn’t that easy. 

Fuck. 

Robert turned down the temperature of the water so he could actually wash himself. 

He was a decent liar, but he could not lie to himself. No matter how much he tried to convince himself he did not want to take Flambae up on his offer, he knew better.

It didn’t matter that it was a terrible idea. Logically knowing it would end up in a disaster didn’t mean you magically stopped wanting something. And some things were worth the inevitable horrible end. It was about the journey or whatever. 

He needed to think things through. 

Hypothetically, if he did text Flambae he changed his mind, what would that mean? Was it a date or a booty call? ‘We’ll see where it goes’ was not very specific. 

What would they even talk about? As far as Robert knew, the only thing they had in common was their job. That was currently Robert’s whole life, so it’s not like he could talk about much else. 

Even if Flambae left the offer open ended, there was a high chance he expected to fuck Robert at some point. Probably today. Was that something he was ready for? He was not about to admit to Flambae that he had very limited experience with men. That would just make things awkward and too vulnerable for his liking. While there was nothing wrong with being inexperienced, he didn’t think it would fit their vibe. He could not imagine them in a ‘Please go slow, it’s my first time’ type of situation. He would not be caught dead saying anything like that, especially not to Flambae, and he doubted that was what the other man wanted from him. 

No, ‘fucking him into the mattress until he cries’ did not imply slow and gentle. 

Jesus. It was just Robert’s luck that none of his ex girlfriends liked to experiment with pegging or at least fingering him. While that wouldn’t be the same, at least it would have given him a general idea. 

He managed to clean himself up and avoided touching the erection he’s had since he started thinking about Flambae. 

He could try fingering himself, to see if he liked it. 

That would decide if he should text Flambae. If he didn’t like it, there was not much point in going. 

He turned off his shower, but stayed in it. There was currently no better place in his apartment to do this. He also didn’t have any lube, go figure. 

He was not about to put on clothes and go out to buy some, if he didn’t do this now he would change his mind. He also refused to google if it was safe to use lotion. He didn’t know how to phrase that and didn't want it in his search history. It would probably be fine. 

He squeezed some on his hand and took a deep breath. Nothing to it, it was just him in the privacy of his apartment, no pressure. He leaned against the wall, arching his back slightly. 

He slowly ran his finger over his hole down to his perineum. He let out the breath he was holding. That felt nice. The area was sensitive. Of course it was, there was a reason people did this. He tried it again, this time with more pressure. Okay, he could work with this. Circling his hole with his fingers, he applied more and more pressure each time. Encouraged by how good it felt, he decided to dip his index finger in. Fuck. He expected resistance, but it went in just fine. He was overwhelmed by the new sensation, needing more.  He desperately wanted to touch his cock with his other hand, but he was using it to lean against the shower wall. He would kill to have a bed he could do this in right now. 

After repeatedly moving his finger in and out, each time going just a little deeper, he added a second. This is where the fun part was supposed to start. He explored a bit, crooking his fingers until…there. Found it. He let out a moan. His neglected cock was leaking precum, but he focused on that spot, massaging it with his fingers over and over trying to make the best out of it.

And if he imagined amber eyes and a hand that was a little bigger than his, that was his business.

Before he could get anywhere, his arm started to cramp up. The angle was just not working. Frustrated, he gave up and went to touch his cock instead. It only took him a few strokes to finish. 

Well. There was his answer. 

He turned on the shower again to wash off the evidence of what he just did. 

He wished he had more time to decide. Maybe buy some lube and a dildo or two to really test out the wonders of anal stimulation on his own terms. But he wasn’t sure he would get a rain check if he blew off Flambae today. 

He dried off and spent an embarrassing amount of time looking for clean clothes.

After feeding Beef his breakfast and drinking his cup of coffee, contemplating if he should change his mind, he gave in and reached for his phone. 

True to Flambae’s words, he now had several new contacts, courtesy of Invisigal. 

“Hey. You still want me to come over?” 

Robert waited a few minutes, nervously looking at his phone. Flambae fortunately did not take long to respond. 

“I knew you would change your mind.”

Arrogant prick. 

“Whatever. Can I bring Beef with me? If I ask Chase to watch him again this soon, I’m probably never getting him back.” 

“He is house trained, yes? I have nice carpet. Expensive.”  

“Asshole. Of course he is.”

“Then why not. Bring him. I prefer cats, but he is cute enough. And not much bigger than a cat.”

“What time?”

“Dinner. Around 6. Want me to pick you up?

“I’ll manage.” 

“Whatever you say. I’ll be waiting. Wear something nice.” 

Dinner at 6. Robert could do that. That gave him enough time to go mattress shopping. Maybe buy some lube and condoms. He assumed Flambae would have more than enough, but they could come in handy some other time.

Chapter Text

By the time Robert got to Flambae’s apartment, he had second guessed the decision too many times to count. But he wasn’t about to back out. Besides, if Flambae actually cooked for him, it would be a dick move to not show up. Yep, that was definitely the reason Robert decided to knock on the door.

He regretted doing it immediately when the door opened. He thought Flambae in his superhero suit was bad enough. There was so much skin on display. What could possibly be worse? He was not prepared for the sight that welcomed him.

Robert has never seen Flambae with his hair down before. Not even after the bar. He slept with the ponytail that night. It could not have been comfortable.

This was an annoyingly good look on him. His hair was down past his shoulders and looked incredibly silky. It did wonders for softening Flambae’s features. His face was still sharp and angular, as were his eyebrows (that grew back to almost their original glory) but the flowy hair combined with the warm tone of his eyes made him look gentler somehow. The apron he was wearing over his clothes also helped. He looked like less of an asshole. Almost approachable. Robert liked what he saw. While he loved his partners to have an edge to them, this worked for him extremely well.

Of course, Flambae had to ruin it immediately. “I thought I told you to wear something nice. This is the best you could do?” He gave Robert a quick once-over, not looking impressed at all. Another hit to Robert’s ego.

“What’s wrong with what I’m wearing?” He looked down at himself. Sure, he was just wearing jeans and a shirt, but they were the best options he had. It wasn’t like he showed up in a hoodie and sweatpants.

“If you even have to ask, you’re hopeless. Whatever. I already cooked, too late to uninvite you now. But I’m already settling here, you could at least put some effort in.”

“I’m feeling very appreciated. Hello, by the way. Nice to see you, too. You look nice.” The last part might have been true, but you wouldn’t be able to tell by Robert’s tone. This was not starting the way he expected. He should have.

“Okay, okay. Just get in, I need to get the koftas off the stove before they burn. You’re early.” Flambae stepped away from the door and inside his apartment, waving Robert in. “Take off your shoes. And if the dog walked outside, go wash his paws.”

Robert was holding Beef in his arms when he showed up on Flambae’s doorstep. The dog was lying on his back, cradled like a baby.

“Though he doesn’t look like he walks much.” Flambae continued, his brows furrowed.

“Hey, you can insult me as much as you want, but don’t fat shame my dog.” Robert wasn’t taking the comment seriously but had to defend Beef’s honour. “Don’t listen to him, Beef. You’re perfect. Yes you are.” The dog was enjoying the belly rubs that accompanied Robert’s words. “And his paws are fine. We Ubered.”

The dog was gently placed on the floor and immediately ran towards Flambae. To Robert’s surprise, the man actually bent down to pet him, even scratching him behind his ears. That was all it took for Beef to count Flambae as one of his favourite people.

“Weren’t you saying something about not burning whatever you’re cooking?” Robert asked while kicking off his shoes and putting down his bag.

“Fuck!” Flambae stood up and hurried into the kitchen. Beef happily ran after him as fast as his little legs let him. Robert shook his head. The evening would be interesting.

—---------------------

Their dinner ended up being fine. Not even a little burnt. Robert was only a little disappointed he couldn’t make fun of Flambae for fucking up. The food more than made up for it. Sure, he hasn’t eaten a home cooked meal in ages, but he was pretty sure this was a step above average cooking.

“This is delicious.” He said between bites. “You weren’t exaggerating about your cooking skills. I was expecting you to be full of shit.” Not that he needed to compliment the food, his plate was already almost empty.

“Of course I wasn’t exaggerating. I told you. I’m perfect. I don’t need to make stuff up to make myself look better.” The smug bastard had the gall to smirk.

“Sure, Mr Perfect. Whatever strokes your ego. As long as you keep feeding me.”

Robert saw Flambae flash him a quick smile.

He took a piece of the lamb from his plate and on autopilot went to offer it to Beef, who was scratching his leg and begging for scraps.

“What are you doing?” Flambae interrupted, grabbing Robert’s hand. “It’s not safe for dogs to eat. You want him to throw up on my carpet?”

“Sorry, force of habit.” Robert replied, putting the lamb back on his plate. “I usually just give him whatever I eat. Otherwise he won’t stop begging me. And I can’t say no to the puppy eyes.”

“Obviously. Dogs can sense weakness. If you told him no sometimes, he’d leave you alone. But you’re too soft.”

“Have you ever had a pet?” Robert asked, curious.

“When I was little, we had cats.” Flambae admitted.

“And you never fed them scraps from your plate?” Robert doubted that. Flambae was a dick, but he wasn’t heartless. There was no way he was not weak to a sad look from a cute kitten.

“They were outside cats. Tough. Took care of themselves.” That was definitely deflecting.

Robert smiled. “That’s not what I asked. Are you telling me you never brought them a piece of ham or something?”

Flambae frowned. “Maybe once or twice. But I didn’t make it a habit.”

“If you say so.” Robert could not keep the smile off his face. It was clear he touched a nerve. It seemed Flambae did not like his soft spots exposed.

“How was your day, by the way? Did you spend all of it dressing up and cooking for me?” Robert teased. Now that the apron was gone, he could admit Flambae put in more effort into looking nice than he did. His clothes looked impeccable and he was wearing a different cologne than usual. It smelled nice. They were sitting close enough to notice. Not across each other as Robert would expect at Flambae’s small kitchen table, but each on one side of the same corner. Their legs were touching.

“The world doesn’t revolve around you, Bobert. I took my niece to the petting zoo. We got ice cream. She was better company than you. So were the goats.”

“I believe the first part.” Robert laughed. He did not doubt it. It was clear Flambae loved his niece. “But I hope I can be better company than a goat.”

Flambae didn’t comment on it further. Instead he asked. “What about you? Did you spend the whole day trying to make your shirt as crinkly as possible? I think you missed a spot.”

So this night would be full of half assed insults. Noted. “Nah, this is just natural talent. I actually went mattress shopping today. It was more involved than I expected. Why are there so many types? And how are so many mattress stores in business? There are way too many in one place. All of them were almost empty. They must be like money laundering schemes, right?”

“Definitely.” Flambae nodded. “So what’s wrong with your current mattress? Not soft enough for you? Or do you need a bigger one to fit two people?” He raised an eyebrow.

“I…don’t currently have one.” Robert admitted.

“What do you mean you don’t have one? Where do you sleep?” Flambae sounded concerned.

“It’s fine. It’s just temporary. Obviously, since I’m shopping for one.” This was not where he wanted the conversation to go. He shouldn’t have mentioned the mattress at all.

“You didn’t answer the question. Sleeping on the couch isn’t good for your back.”

“Well, we don’t have to worry about that. I don’t have a couch either.” He just kept digging his grave deeper apparently.

“What the fuck do you mean you don’t have a mattress or a couch. Did you get robbed? Or did you just move?” At this point the mood was about to be permanently ruined.

“Look, this isn’t a great date conversation, ok? If that is what this is. It’s just going to make me look like more of a loser. Just…it’s fine. I’m working on it.” Robert really didn’t feel like explaining his pathetic living situation. Especially since he didn’t have an explanation. He did not recently move. He was not robbed. He just lived in an empty apartment with no furniture for no apparent reason.

“Ok.” Flambae said after looking at Robert for a while. “I won’t ask. And yes, this is a date. I don’t cook for just anyone.” He placed his hand on Robert’s knee, tracing circles with his thumb.

“Good to know. Otherwise it would have been really awkward when I asked to spend the night. Not to play the pity card, but my new mattress is going to be delivered next week. So I still don’t have anywhere to sleep.” He could at least make light of his situation.

It worked, Flambae was clearly amused. “I thought you said no fucking on the first date?”

“Who said anything about fucking? I just want to use you for your mattress. You can sleep on the floor for all I care.” Robert teased.

“My mattress and I are a package deal. And I remember saying something about fucking you into it until you cry.” The conversation turned heated out of seemingly nowhere.

“I feel like that’s more of a third date activity. I might be persuaded to lift the ‘no fucking’ rule, but I will not break my rule of ‘no crying until the third date’.” Robert had honestly no idea what he was saying anymore. Was this even flirting? What the fuck was happening.

“Pity, I was looking forward to the crying.” Whatever was happening, Flambae clearly didn’t mind at all, encouraging it.

“I could always fuck YOU util you cry, if you’re so set on the tears. I don’t have any rules for that.” Robert’s mouth had a mind of its own at this point. He did not approve anything that was coming out of it.

“With your tiny dick? I mean, you’re welcome to try.” That wasn’t a no. It was an insult, but Flambae did not look opposed to the idea. Quite the opposite actually. It almost sounded like a challenge. Interesting.

“I thought it was fine? Normal sized? Just not suitable for porn?” Robert could not help himself.

“You heard that.” Flambae’s tone changed. It was playful before, he clearly enjoyed the teasing back and forth they just had. But now he sounded cautious.

“Yeah. I was on my way to lunch, but managed to catch you defending my dick. Thanks by the way. I mean you were the reason everyone was making fun of me in the first place, but I still appreciate you stepping in.”

“But you didn’t hear anything else I said, right?” Flambae looked nervous.

Fortunately Robert didn’t listen in further, so he didn’t have to lie. “No, why? Did you say something embarrassing?”

“Maybe, guess you’ll never know.” Flambae went back to his teasing tone. “But let’s get back to where we were. I believe you were saying you wanted to fuck me?” Flambae moved closer to Robert, raising his eyebrow expectantly. Huh. Robert was mostly just saying that to get a raise out of Flambae. At least he thought so. His mouth was faster than his brain, so he wasn’t completely sure what his intentions were. He didn’t expect Flambae to be into it.

“I think my exact words were that I would fuck you until you cry. And I’ll take you up on that….” Robert got up. “some other time.” He headed in the direction of the kitchen door.

That got Flambae’s attention. “What? Where are you going?” He got up and followed Robert. ”You can’t just say shit like that and then leave.”

“Relax, I just need to piss.” Robert took pity on Flambae who looked like a kicked puppy. “Why don’t you head into the bedroom and I’ll meet you there?”

“You have no right to talk about mixed signals. I have no idea what is fucking happening right now.” Flambae murmured, partially to himself, but headed in the direction of the bedroom.

Robert wasn’t exactly lying, he could use the bathroom. But mostly he wanted to check his bag and take out what he impulsively bought along with the lube and condoms.

While he would definitely take Flambae up on the offer of fucking him at some point, he came here with a plan, and he wasn’t going to chicken out.

Chapter Text

Robert watched Flambae disappear into the bedroom. Okay. First things first. He went to pick up Beef and put him into the living room, far from the bedroom. He didn’t want to traumatize the dog. He quickly looked around to see if there was anything that could be either dangerous or breakable, not finding anything. The room itself looked like the rest of the apartment. Cozy and lived in. Not what Robert expected, but he guessed it weirdly made sense.

He didn’t have to feel bad about closing the door, Beef was clearly more than happy to stay there. He managed to jump up on the couch and curl into his usual sleeping position. They could have the ‘do you allow pets on the furniture’ discussion later. He suspected the answer he would get would be ‘no’ but at the same time Flambae probably wouldn’t kick the dog off. This was a case of asking for forgiveness instead of permission.

Which brought him back to the item in his bag. He was going to spring this on Flambae out of nowhere. Although he hoped to get permission in this case.

Now, this was probably a bad idea. A REALLY bad idea. A worse idea than being here in the first place. But it made sense, okay? Kind of. Maybe.

So. Robert was about to have sex with Flambae. Well he hoped so, all signs pointed to yes. He wanted to. But they were both sober, and he doubted grinding and a messy hand job would do it.

Okay, no. That was a shitty excuse. He knew full well he could give a mean blowjob if needed. He didn’t really have a gag reflex. He was also reasonably sure that if he set a boundary of ‘no butt stuff’, Flambae would respect it. But his morning experiment made him curious. He never got the chance to try anal, and now he was handed the perfect one. And it was clear that was what Flambae wanted from him in the first place.

The issue? Robert was nervous. And he didn’t want Flambae to know that. What made him nervous was the unpredictability. He didn’t know what to expect. He didn’t know what Flambae would do and how he would react to it. The solution? Go full on control freak mode. Remove the variables you cannot control and focus on managing those you can. Simple. He could not predict his reactions and how he would feel, but he could control what Flambae could do to him. Make sure he maintained a bit of control over what would happen.

It was logical and made perfect sense. Well, at least it did in the moment when Robert was completing his purchase.

It was kind of like jumping into the ocean before you learned to swim in a pool. But he was reasonably sure he wouldn’t drown.

Robert walked into the bedroom to find Flambae standing next to the bed, unbuttoning his shirt, his chest on display. Robert really hoped he would get plenty of chances to run his hands through the chest hair and along the pecs.

Flambae glanced at Robert, raising his eyebrow. “That for me or you?” He nodded to the object Robert was holding.

“I was hoping for you. But we can forget about it if you’re not into it. We haven’t really discussed this kind of thing.” Robert put the wrist restrains on the bed.

“I didn’t say that. I can be into it. But you know I could burn through these in like 2 seconds, right? You could have at least brought handcuffs. I could burn through those too, but it would take a little longer.” That went honestly better than Robert expected.

“I am aware, yes. I’m hoping you will play along and stay put.” That was actually a big part of the appeal. Having Flambae hold himself back, if it worked out, would be probably the hottest thing about this whole night.

“And why would I do that?” It was a fair question. Time to test out his motivation. Robert really hoped he didn’t overestimate how much Flambae wanted him here.

“Because if you don’t, I’ll leave.“ Robert held eye contact with Flambae and hoped that would convey he was being serious.

“Jesus Christ.” Flambae let out a surprised laugh. “You’re one crazy bitch, you know that? You’re giving me whiplash. I can’t tell if you’re fucking with me or if you just don’t know what you want.”

“Your choice. In or out?” Robert stayed serious, still holding eye contact.

“You wouldn’t actually leave, right? Like if I slip up?”

“Try me.”

“No way. You have more to lose than me if you leave. We’d both get blue balls but you don’t even have a place to sleep. You’re bluffing.” Flambae sounded like he was trying to convince himself more than Robert.

“I‘ve managed this long. And giving you blue balls because you couldn’t listen to one simple request, knowing full well it was your fault, would be absolutely worth it.”

Flambae groaned. “I hate you so much. It’s always the fucking boring ones that turn out to be trouble.”

“Is that a yes to staying put and not destroying the restraints?” Robert asked, already knowing the answer. While Flambae protested and complained, it was clear he was very into what was happening.

“Fuck. Whatever. Sure.” He did not sound happy. “You want me to call you ‘sir’ too?”

“Whatever gets you going. But ‘Robert’ is fine.” He stepped towards Flambae and took hold of the bottom edges of his unbuttoned shirt, using them to pull the other man closer. He leaned in while getting on his tiptoes. He both loved and hated that he needed to do that. Flambae was clearly on the same page, leaning down expectantly. Robert stopped and waited just before making contact, their lips close but not touching. He held for a few seconds, waiting for a reaction. It didn’t take long. Flambae’s eyes were burning holes in his. The man got tired of waiting, grabbed Robert by the hips and pulled him the rest of the way. Robert smiled against Flambae’s lips. This would be fun.

Robert broke their kiss in favour of placing small kisses down Flambae’s neck. He was surprised there weren’t any hickeys from the last time he did this. Clearly he needed to try harder.

He moved his hands to grab the top of Flambae’s shirt and help him take it off. This meant Flambae had to let go of him, so it was about time for them to move this to the bed.

“Lie down on your back, hands above your head and don’t move them.”

The man hesitated for a second, but did as he was told. Robert pulled his own shirt off, climbing on top of Flambae, sitting with legs on each side of his hips. He grabbed the restraints and moved closer so he could cuff Flambae’s hands to the headboard. While doing that, he leaned in, his lips almost touching Flambae’s ear and whispering. “Good boy.”

He moved back while closely watching Flambae to assess his reaction. The caught breath, the widening eyes, the subtle jerk of his hands before remembering he couldn’t move them. All signs pointed to this one being in the ‘definitely into it’ column. Robert was making mental notes.

Before giving Flambae a chance to say anything, Robert leaned in again. The kiss was filthy and wet, both of them struggling to catch their breath. Robert also took his opportunity to explore the exposed chest now that he could, running his hands up and down, focusing on cupping the pecs and running his fingers over Flambae’s nipples. The other man’s soft moans were getting lost between their lips.

They were both rock hard, had been for a while. Robert was slowly grinding on Flambae’s lap, but it was about time to move things along.

He broke their kiss, moving a bit to reach the zipper of Flambae’s pants.

“Robert. Come on. This isn’t fair. You’re getting to touch whatever you want and I’m just supposed to lie here and not move?” he complained, but didn’t move an inch.

“I could stop touching you, if you don’t like it.” Robert shrugged.

“You know that’s not what I meant.”

“You want to keep going? You’ll stay put. If you can’t handle it, just say the word and I can go. No hard feelings. Now lift up your hips.”

Robert managed to pull off Flambae’s pants along with his underwear, and started working on his own.

“Is this how it’s always going to be with you? Or is this a special occasion?” Flambae grumbled.

“Don’t skip ahead, I haven't even agreed to a second date yet.” Now naked, Robert moved back to his previous position. He ran his hands down Flambae’s chest again, this time continuing down his stomach and lower towards the V of his hips. He explored the area while avoiding touching the straining erection. A little anticipation would not hurt.

“Fucking asshole, if you won’t let me touch you, at least don’t be such a fucking tease.”

Okay. A little teasing was fine, but he didn’t want Flambae to get so frustrated he would decide playing along wasn’t worth it.

“Where is your lube and condoms?” He asked.

“Nightstand. Like every normal person.”

Robert decided to not respond to that. He reached over and grabbed what he needed. He tried to warm some lube in his hand before reaching to finally touch Flambae’s cock, slowly stroking it. The man basically jumped up at the first touch. Robert didn’t really have many opinions on other people’s penises, but the one in his hand was nice. Longer than his, not too thick. Attached to an arrogant asshole that was too hot to be fair. He probably wouldn’t mind getting his mount on it at some point. But not tonight. Robert ran his thumb along the visible vein, applying a little more pressure. Then immediately let go.

“Come on!” Flambae groaned, clearly frustrated.

“A little patience. I promise it will be worth it.” Robert responded. Okay, showtime. He could do this. It was just sex.

He applied more lube and reached back. It was exactly the same as this morning, the only difference was that he wasn’t alone. He felt Flambae’s eyes burning into him. He worked up to two fingers pretty fast, starting to scissor them and deciding to add a third. He was probably rushing it, the stretch providing a pleasant burn. But that was fine. He didn’t want to be on display longer than necessary, he needed to give Flambae something to focus on so the man would stop intently staring.

He opened his eyes, not realizing he even closed them.

“Ready?” He asked Flambae.

“I was ready the second you walked in here. I’m just happy you finally caught up.”

Robert opened the condom and put it on Flambae. He also generously coated his cock with lube. This time he didn’t warm it up, so the man flinched and cursed. Moment of truth. He lifted himself up and aligned the head with his hole. His nerve endings were on fire.

He began lowering himself, feeling it pop in. Fuck. The stretch was more than his fingers prepared him for, but it felt incredible.

“Shit. You feel good.” Flambae’s words brought him back to reality. Right. He wasn’t alone. He needed to put on a show.

He began moving, lowering himself as far as he could handle and coming back up. It didn't take long before he found the right angle for Flambae’s cock to hit his spot. He let out a loud moan the first time it happened. He went lower and lower each time, soon taking Flambae’s whole length. He began properly riding Flambae’s cock, holding any part of the man he could reach to support himself.

He was getting close, but it was becoming harder and harder to move. He was overwhelmed and his legs felt like jello. He was slowing down considerably.

“Robert. Please let me take these off and touch you.” Flambae pleaded. “I’ll fuck you so good, I promise.”

That wasn't the original plan, but Robert was considering it. It would probably be for the best. And at least Flambae asked nicely.

“Okay.” he decided to say quietly.

Flambae didn’t hesitate for a second. Instead of waiting for Robert to remove the restraints, he burned them off. He wasn’t wrong earlier, it only took a couple of seconds.

Before Robert knew what was happening, he was flipped on his back with Flambae leaning over him. The other man took advantage of his now free hands, using one to grip and pull Robert’s hair and the other to move one of his legs up towards his chest and holding it there. He also immediately went in for a filthy kiss.

The angle was different in this position, Robert felt the dick in him hitting deeper. Flambae’s pace was relentless, he could barely catch his breath. The rolling motions of the other man’s hips were lighting sparks beneath his skin.

Robert held out as long as he could, but he stood no chance delaying his orgasm. He came with a gasp during an especially deep thrust and immediately went boneless.

“Fuck. You’re incredible. So tight. Robert!” Flambae didn’t last much longer than him, finishing inside.

They just laid there, catching their breaths in silence and not moving.

Finally Flambae spoke. “So what do you think? Worth a second date?”

Robert couldn't help but chuckle. “Yeah, you know what? I think it was.”

Flambae threw away the condom and handed Robert tissues to clean himself with. He then laid on his side, holding out his open arms. “Come on. This was part of the deal too.”

“I don’t remember agreeing to anything.” Robert said, but moved into Flambae’s arms. He was willing to be the little spoon again, just to test if he would sleep as well as the last time.

It took no time at all for the warmth emanating from Flambae to spread along his body, making him relax.

“Good night.” Flambae whispered.

“M’…night…”

Chapter Text

Robert woke up to the feeling of kisses on the back of his neck and an arm slowly stroking his stomach. Then there was also the erection pressing into his lower back.

“You could at least let me enjoy sleeping in a bed for once. Why are you waking me up?” he protested.

“You can sleep after, if you want.”

“Or you could leave me alone and I could be sleeping right now.”

“Come on. Don’t be like that.” Flambae moved his arm lower, taking hold of Robert’s cock. “You’re already hard.”

Robert sighed. He wasn’t wrong. “Fine, but I’m not moving an inch. You do whatever you want.”

“Dangerous offer, Robbie. But I’ll be nice.” Flambae continued stroking him while peppering his neck with soft kisses.

“Fuck. Okay. That works. Don’t stop.” Robert was fully on board now. Shit. This was about to end embarrassingly fast.

Flambae could probably tell that Robert was worked up. He let go of his dick in favour of turning him on his stomach.

“Are you just doing the opposite of what I say out of spite?” Robert complained half heartedly.

“You said whatever I want.” Flambae kneeled behind him.

Robert felt hands spreading his cheeks. He groaned and pushed his face into the pillow. He almost missed the sound of Flambae spitting, but definitely felt the result. Flambae used his thumbs to spread the spit over Robert’s hole.

Robert turned his head to the side so he could speak. “You can’t even be bothered to get the lube? You’re not fucking me with just spit.”

“Calm down, I’ll get the lube later. But I hate the texture.”

“What does that have to do with any…Oh. Fuck.”

So it turns out a tongue feels very different than fingers. Duh. Flambae was not wasting time, he went right in, lapping at the exposed ring of muscle.

“Jesus. You could have warned me.”

Flambae’s only response was a low hum, the resulting vibrations sending shivers across Robert’s skin. Flambae was switching between running his tongue around Robert’s hole and dipping in, getting it nice and wet.

Robert’s dick was painfully hard, but he had no way to reach it. The hands spreading his cheeks were also pressing him into the bed.

“Please. I can’t cum like this.” He pleaded.

Flambae lifted his head. “You were all for teasing yesterday, when it was me begging."

“Is this what this is about? Petty revenge?”

“I don’t know what you’re talking about.” Flambae kept one hand pressing Robert down, but reached for the lube with the other. Then squeezed the cold gel directly onto Robert’s hole.

Robert’s whole body jerked. “Fuck you, you asshole!”

Flambae paid him no mind, going straight to fingering Robert. His fingers were noticeably thicker. Even with Robert’s hole wet and loosened by Flambae’s tongue, two were already a tight stretch.

“Jesus, look at you. I thought you’d still be loose from yesterday. I considered just skipping the prep. Good thing I didn’t, you’re like a vice.”

Robert went back to shoving his face into the pillow, trying to muffle his moans. Flambae’s fingers were also longer and had no trouble reaching his prostrate. On Every. Single. Push. He almost jumped when he felt what had to be Flambae’s thumb joining the other 2 fingers. That was a little too much at once. Shit. Right. Flambae was right handed. Robert didn’t need to be reminded of his missing fingers.

He fortunately didn’t have time for depressing thoughts to ruin the mood. It seemed Flambae decided he was prepped enough.

“Lift up.” He instructed, tapping Robert on the hip and pushing a pillow under him when he complied.

Robert heard the sound of the condom packet opening and braced himself. Flambae didn’t go slow, he pushed in all at once, knocking the breath out of Robert. He laid on top of the other man, covering Robert’s body with his completely. He reached out for Robert’s hands and entwined their fingers, placing their arms on the bed above their heads.

Robert could barely breathe, the weight of the man above him overwhelming. The thrusts were slow but deep, sending sparks through his entire body. As close as they were, he felt every hot breath the other man let out. His neglected cock was leaking precum into the pillow below his hips. He didn’t know how long he could take it.

Fortunately Flambae seemed to also want relief. He lifted up, no longer covering his body. Instead, he gripped his hips to get leverage and started mercilessly pounding into him. Robert’s moans were no longer completely muffled by the pillow, getting so loud they were audible even through it. He didn’t last long. The overwhelming pace and power of the thrusts managed to force an orgasm out of him.

“Fuck, listen to the sounds you make. Ahhh.” Flambae’s pace was faltering. He managed a few more deep thrusts before cumming and collapsing on top of Robert.

—-------------------------------

It was a while before they managed to get out of bed. Robert vehemently refused a shared shower. He was already sore enough. He showered first, and was now sitting in Flambae’s kitchen thinking about what he should do next. He wasn’t sure where they stood.

Yesterday was a date, Flambae confirmed that. And it went pretty well if the way he woke up today was any indication. So this probably wasn’t a situation where he could just leave without saying goodbye. But he also wasn’t sure what else to do. He needed to go home. It didn’t occur to him to bring any food for Beef.

“So, I assume you don’t have any plans today since you have no life.” Flambae walked in, going around the kitchen island Robert was sitting at and straight to the coffee maker.

Robert wasn’t sure why he expected Flambae to be nicer to him now. It clearly wasn’t going to happen. He wasn’t sure if he should be disappointed.

“And how would you know? I’m a social butterfly. I just don’t talk about my life with my coworkers.” Putting emphasis on the last word, Robert leaned back in his chair, crossed his arms and shot Flambae an annoyed look. He was of course full of shit. But if Flambae was going to be a dick to him, he would reciprocate.

“If you’re trying to hurt my feelings, you need to do better.” Flambae said back, not even looking up from the coffee cup he was taking out of the cupboard. “I’m just stating facts. No need to be a bitch about it. Or do you actually have plans that aren’t ‘feed my dog’ and ‘stare at the wall thinking about where I should hang myself’?”

Robert frowned. “I’ve had the perfect spot picked out for a while already. But just so you know, I was actually planning to go to the gym today.”

“I can’t tell if you’re joking.” Flambae stared at him. “You are joking, right?”

“Why would I be joking about going to the gym?” Robert was confused.

“Not about…You know what? Never mind. Yes, I thought you were joking about going to the gym because you’re so scrawny. But that was not the point of this. I was asking to see if you had any plans in the evening. The rest of us are going to the Sardine. You should come with.”

“Isn’t that the supervillain bar?” It had a reputation, and none of it was good.

“Yes. But we are banned from Crypto Night, remember? Anyway, you will be with us, so it’s going to be fine.”

“Okay, yeah. Fuck it. Why not. How bad could it be.” Robert shrugged.

“No need to sound so excited.” Flambae poured himself a cup of coffee. “You want some?” He asked, gesturing to the mug.

“Nah, I need to get home. I didn’t bring any dog food and Beef is already missing his breakfast time.”

Flambae gave him a sceptical look. “I think Beef could miss a few more breakfasts and he would still be fine. Probably better.”

“What did I tell you about fat shaming my dog?” Robert couldn’t keep a small smile from his face.

“Fine. I won’t. But don’t come crying to me when he dies because you overfed him.”

“Whatever. I’m gonna go. See you tonight.” Robert got up to leave.

“What, no kiss goodbye?” Flambae asked.

“You want one? Is that what we do now?” Robert genuinely wanted to know. He had no idea how things were supposed to be between them now.

Flambae looked conflicted for a second, but then walked over to Robert and placed a quick peck on his lips. “See you tonight.”

Chapter Text

Robert lucked out. He was hoping nobody would be using the SDN gym on a Sunday at noon, but he wasn’t sure. But no, the gym was completely empty. That was good. He shouldn’t really care what others thought about him and most of the time he didn’t. But comparing himself to people with superpowers was a bad idea on his best day. And after a 4 month coma and multiple injuries…he wasn’t at his best.

The treadmill was first. He needed to warm up.

He was getting better. His muscles were slowly coming back and his strength and endurance with them. But he was still nowhere near his pre accident level. If he ever wanted to be Mecha Man again, he needed to step up. People often thought that the suit did everything for him. That he was just ‘playing a video game’ while real heroes put their lives on the line. That was the furthest thing from the truth. He still needed to be fit to be Mecha Man. And the scars on his body should be proof enough that he was putting his life on the line just as much as anyone else.

The muscles in his legs were screaming at him by the time he stopped running and he was getting a stitch in his side. Still not good enough. He moved to the heavy bags. At least his muscle memory was still good. His footwork was still solid. He just needed to get faster and pack more of a punch.

He realized that he could have ended up much worse. The most important thing was that he was alive. So far he avoided the family tradition. Although he was trying his best to get back into the suit, it would probably catch up to him at some point. At least it looked like he would not be passing it down. Robert could admit his relationship with his father wasn’t the best. He was distant. Saving the world didn’t leave you a lot of time to go to soccer practice. And when present, he was demanding. He expected a lot from Robert. After all, he set the standard high. It wasn’t enough for his son to meet it, he needed to exceed it. Just as Mecha Man Astral surpassed Mecha Man Prime’s legacy, Robert was supposed to surpass his father’s.

His knuckles were raw and he was drenched in sweat. Last stop for the day, the bench press. He starts with two 35 lb plates, but he needs to add more if he wants to get back in shape. He adds a 25 lb plate to each side. He would be able to lift this before. He could do it now as well. Fuck, it was harder than it should be. Forget lifting the barbell up, he was struggling to keep it from going down and pinning him. Shit. Every muscle in his body was shaking with effort. It would be so fucking embarrassing if he got stuck there. Or worse if he managed to strangle himself and somebody from SDN found his body.

“You need some help?” A smirking face appeared above him.

Robert wasn’t sure if he should be happy or mortified that Flambae was here. On one hand, now he probably wouldn’t die. On the other, he would never live this down. He might have preferred if Royd found his dead body on Monday.

“You’re not supposed to lift without a spot, idiot.” The asshole pointed to the poster saying people without superpowers needed a spotter. Fucking bullshit. How did invisibility or super hearing help you with lifting? It was just condescending.

Robert was straining hard and losing the last of his strength. Why was the flaming asshole not helping him?!

“So weak. So so weak.” Flambae finally took pity on him and grabbed the barbell and pulled it up like it weighed nothing.

“Now I’m getting a safety lecture from a walking fireball?” Robert scoffed.

“It’s a reality check.” Flambae walked to the squad rack and loaded a frankly obscene amount of weights on the barbell. What was that, 280 pounds worth of plates? “Normies need babysitters so you don’t hurt yourself thinking you’re a hero.” He continued, doing the barbell squat like he wasn’t holding what was almost twice Robert’s weight. “Man, I’m so fucking strong. It’s crazy.”

Now he was just showing off. There was no other explanation.

“Thank you for being my babysitter. I will be more careful next time.” Robert decided to go with a diplomatic response. The man did just save his ass, and although he hated to admit it, pushing himself without a spotter was a stupid move. He couldn’t keep the sarcasm out of his voice completely, but it would have to do.

“Fuck off.” Flambae responded, still doing squats. “Wait, that was genuine?” He sounded truly surprised. He finally left the squad rack and walked towards Robert, patting him on the head.

“No more hero stuff without supervision. You can’t get injured because we need you behind that desk to help the real heroes.”

Robert was conflicted. If phrased differently, the statement would almost read as concerned. The key words were there. But the emphasis on REAL heroes and the condescending tone ruined it. He decided to take it as an insult and retaliate.

“Uh, actually, speaking of injuries, remind me, who burned off your eyebrows again?” He decided to intentionally touch a sore spot. The other man deserved it. “I assume it happens all the time, given your, y’know, your fire shit, so…”

“I got into a fight with an actual real actual hero.” Flambae leaned closer, angrily pointing in Robert’s direction. “And I assure you, he’s regretting his decision to tangle with me.”

Robert slapped his hand away. “I imagine he’s regretting a lot of his decisions.” Oh Robert was regretting his decision to ‘tangle’ with Flambae, sure. Not in the way the man meant it though. He was such a fucking asshole. He couldn’t even admit that his eyebrows burning off was mostly his own fucking fault. Fight with an actual hero, sure. It was satisfying to hear Flambae call him that after the whole ‘you’re a weak helpless normie’ spiel, but calling that a fight was such a joke. Robert barely had to move a finger.

“That’s fucking right.” Flambae mistook his comment for agreement, so his tone was self assured and cocky. “And for you,” he grabbed Robert’s shoulder, “it’s time to accept that you don’t got it anymore. And pretending you still do is bumming people the fuck out. Now, get your flat ass off my bench”

“You know what? Fuck you!” Robert did get his ass off the bench, standing up and getting into Flambae’s face. “You have no right telling people what they should or shouldn’t be doing. You did it to Waterboy, you’re doing it to me.” He angrily pushed his index finger into Flambae’s chest. “You think you’re perfect and everyone around you is inferior. Newsflash, dickhead, Waterboy had more successful missions last week than you did. And more importantly, he actually tried his best to be a proper hero.” He emphasized his point with another push. “You’re just getting by on the powers you were born with. Just because you won the genetic lottery you don’t even have to try. If I had your powers, I would try my fucking best to help as many people as possible. Instead you just cruise by with barely any effort and set shit on fire on purpose to keep up some arbitrary points. All while talking down to anyone else who tries. And even that is an improvement over what you were doing before. Your actions hurt people.” Robert was screaming at this point. “And for me? You know nothing about me. I’m trying my fucking best to get to where I used to be. I was an amazing fucking superhero, and I will be again. I don’t need your condescending speeches. If you think I’m so pathetic and weak, why don’t you just leave me the fuck alone?”

Robert felt so exhausted after his outburst. He looked at Flambae’s face, expecting the man to be angry and either storm off or maybe even punch him. Instead, he just found a shocked expression. Flambae was frozen in place.

Robert couldn’t do this. He turned around and started walking out of the gym. He didn’t get far before he heard hurried steps behind him.

“Robert, wait!”

He walked faster, almost breaking into a run. He would, if his muscles weren’t still hurting. The footsteps behind him also picked up pace.

“Fucking, wait a second.” Flambae caught up to him and grabbed his arm. Robert tried to shake him off, but he was unsuccessful. Flambae stepped in front of him, still holding his arm.

“Just give me a second, okay? I’m sorry.” Another apology from Flambae? Robert couldn’t believe his ears.

“I’m sorry. I didn’t mean it like that. I know I make fun of you for being weak. Objectively, compared to me you are.”

Robert grimaced and tried to shake off Flambae again.

“Let me fucking finish. What I mean to say is that I just don’t want you to get hurt, okay? I’m not saying you are weak as a person. But you have to fucking admit that you are physically weaker. We just had a demonstration. Why should you risk getting hurt out there? Let the people who won the genetic lottery do it. The same goes for the kid. He’s a walking disaster. He’s going to get himself killed in the field.”

“That’s not up to you to decide, Flambae. He wants to be a hero. I believe in him. He could be a great one. He just needs a chance. It’s also not up to you to decide what I do. I don’t care if you think I’m weak. I belong out there, helping. And if I do get myself killed, that was my choice.”

“That’s a stupid fucking choice.”

“Still a choice I’m making. Is that going to be a problem? Because I’m telling you right now, if you try to stop me or talk me out of it, I’m not going to listen and I’m going to walk away.”

“Don’t.” Flambae pulled him into a hug. Robert went willingly, sufficiently cooled off from his previous anger. “I still don’t like it. But I won’t stop you. And I’ll try not talking down to you. Even if you are a weak normie.

Chapter Text

Robert relaxed into the hug. Now that his anger dissipated, he could enjoy being close to Flambae. The other man held him tightly, running his hands across his back. Heat was radiating off him as always.

Robert was not really a touchy person. He didn’t grow up in an environment where physical affection was freely given. He could probably count the number of times his dad ever hugged him on one hand. When he thought about it, the person who gave him the most hugs when he was growing up was probably Chase. So this kind of affection did not come naturally to him. He has of course hugged a number of people over the years, but it never stopped feeling awkward. He didn’t know what to do with his hands, when to let go, how close to get. Here with Flambae, he decided to just go for it, grabbing his waist.

“I’m also sorry. I said some shitty things back there too.” Robert admitted.

“It’s fine.” Flambae buried one of his hands in Robert’s hair, slowly massaging circles at the back of his skull and tucking Robert’s head under his chin. He even placed a soft kiss on the top of Robert’s head.

“This is nice.” Robert sighed. “But we should probably go. This is still the SDN building. Someone could walk in.”

“Who the fuck is going to come here on the weekend? And it’s not like we’re fucking or something.”

Robert realized that was a good point. Nobody came here on the weekends. Especially not Flambae.

“So what are you doing here? I came in specifically because I hoped the gym would be empty. I didn’t expect to see you.” Robert started slowly pulling away.

“Yeah…me too. The bench…it’s always taken. So I…”

“So you just happened to come here at the exact time I was here?” Robert interrupted, fully stepping away from Flambae and raised an eyebrow.

“That’s…yes. I did.” The stuttering was enough to confirm Robert’s suspicions.

“Uhuh.” Robert hummed knowingly, crossing his arms.

“What?”

“You know I’m friends with Waterboy, right? He mentioned you started taking him to the gym with you, trying to get him to work out. Always on the same days at the same time. So you want to tell me how you knew exactly when I’d be here?”

“Wetwipeboy should learn to keep his mouth shut.” Flambae seemed annoyed, but there was no longer hostility when he talked about the newest addition to the z-team.

“That wasn’t an answer.” Robert insisted.

“Okay, fine.” Flambae relented. “We were talking about you in the group chat. Trying to guess which washed up superhero you used to be. Golem mentioned he saw you heading this way.”

Ah, right, Golem didn’t actually have his own apartment at the moment. Most people weren’t happy renting to a sentient construct. He was living on the SDN premises, often loitering outside of the building, listening to his music. Robert didn’t recall seeing him on his way here, but his mind had been pretty occupied.

“And why exactly are you stalking me?” He was sure the reason would be incredibly stupid.

“I wanted a chance to get insider information straight from the source. There’s a lot of money on the line, Rob.”

Right, the $936 pool Malevola and Prism talked about. He was not surprised to learn they were placing bets, even if it was a little childish. Honestly, he wouldn’t have an issue with it if there wasn’t so much on the line for him.

“First of all, this couldn’t wait until the bar?” Robert asked. They would be seeing each other in a couple of hours. “And secondly, what makes you think I’ll tell you anything?”

“Everyone’s going to be in the bar. It defeats the purpose of the bet if everyone figures it out.” Flambae scoffed. “And come on! You’re supposed to share personal details with people you date, no?”

Robert made a mental note. Dating. Okay. That made this an even more dangerous topic. He fucked up so badly by agreeing to the date with Flambae but not coming clean. He’s had some bad breakups, but whatever would happen when Flambae found out would put them to shame. He would probably be lucky to walk away not burned to the crisp. And honestly, whatever was coming, he deserved it. It would be different if they weren’t…whatever they were. Dating, he corrected himself. If they were just co-workers, he could deal with it. He understood why Flambae held a grudge against Mecha Man, even if Robert stood by what he did that day. But he had an inkling the lying would play a big part in the impending blow out. He doubted Flambae would appreciate finding out he was sleeping with the enemy without knowing. But Robert was in too deep to stop. Sure, they only had one date so far, but he was already falling harder than he thought he could. He was even before their drunk hook up. He was just in denial then. And right now, as fucked up as it was, he planned to enjoy whatever time he could get with the man before things went to shit.

“Sure, learning about each other is usually step one. Not that we’re doing a good job of that. I don’t even know your actual name, man. Or do you want me to call you Flambae all the time?” Robert hoped that wasn’t the case. It was weird he was still calling him that.

Flambae just smirked. “I don’t mind.”

“Well I do. It’s a stupid fucking name.” It really was. It absolutely worked for Flambae, but that didn’t make it any less corny. “And I refuse to call you that when we have sex.”

“It’s not stupid! I worked hard on picking it, okay? It works on so many levels” Flambae argued. “But fine, whatever. My name is Chad. You can call me Chad.”

“Nice to meet you, Chad.” Robert smiled and held out his hand. To his surprise, Flambae actually shook it.

“Your turn now.” Of course Flambae wouldn’t let it go.

“I’m not going to tell you which superhero I used to be. There is a reason a secret identity is a secret.” He hoped the other man would let it go.

“I didn’t think so. That would be too easy. I prefer a challenge. But you can give me a hint, no? Come on, at least something.”

Robert should straight up say no. Absolutely not. Dangerous territory. But what were the chances of Flambae actually guessing correctly? The one advantage of Flambae underestimating him was that he would never guess someone as high profile and successful as Mecha Man. He could humour him to get him off his back.

“That depends. What kind of hint do you want? I already told Malevola and Prism I was double jointed.” He joked. “They didn’t seem impressed.”

“I don’t know. Maybe we can play like twenty questions.” Flambae suggested.

“No.” That would narrow it down a little too much. “I’ll give you three. And no guarantee to answer.”

“Ten.” Flambae shot back.

Robert was not going to do that. Any questions at all would put him on thin ice. “Three.”

“Five.”

Okay, he had enough. “Two.”

“You can’t go down!” Flambae protested. “That’s not how negotiating works.”

“One.” This wasn’t a negotiation. “Keep going and it goes to zero.”

“Okay, okay!” Flambae held up his hands in surrender. “I’ll take one question. Does it have to be yes or no, or will you give me an actual answer?”

“Depends on the question.” Robert hoped for something surface level, or even something he could use to mislead.

Flambae was silent for a while, clearly thinking about it. “How did you get the scars?” He finally settled on asking.

“I’m not answering that one.” Robert grimaced. “Pick a different one.” That was a touchy subject and would definitely give him away.

“Fine. Then…what happened to your superpowers? Like how did you lose them?” Of course Flambae would be completely off while also asking a question that could potentially get Robert in trouble. But it would have to do.

“Nothing happened to them. There, question answered.” Robert doubted the other man would be satisfied.

“What do you mean?” Flambae asked, surprised. “If you still have superpowers, why aren’t you using them? What are they?”

“I already answered the question. I’m not answering any more.” Robert insisted.

“That’s such a bullshit answer. That gives me nothing.” the man basically whined. “That’s not even a hint. All I know now is that you have superpowers. Like every fucking superhero out there.” Oh the irony. “But either they’re super lame or you just refuse to use them.”

“Or maybe it’s both. My powers are so lame that I refuse to use them so I don’t embarrass myself.” Robert decided that they'd been standing around for too long and started heading for the exit, Flambae following him.

“If that is true, why do you want to be a superhero again so bad?” Flambae questioned.

“I don’t know. It’s all I’ve ever done. I’m not sure how to be anything else.” Robert had no idea why he decided to answer genuinely. Helping people was of course a big part of why he kept being Mecha Man, even when he could barely afford to keep the suit functional and eat at the same time. But the truth of the matter was that being Mecha Man was his entire life. It was tied to his existence. For big chunks of his life, that’s all he was. He didn’t know if he could leave it behind.

Flambae gave him a look. “That is so depressing. I hope you know that.”

“Yeah, yeah.” He shrugged.

They reached the main door, stepping outside.

“Look, I’m going to head home. Please don’t stalk me this time, ok? I’ll see you later.” Robert turned to Flambae and gave him a quick kiss goodbye. He was aiming for the cheek, but ended up landing it closer to the man’s chin.

Chapter Text

𝅘𝅥𝅮 I look good. Feel better. I gotta ask, just for the record. 𝅘𝅥𝅮

The Sardine was not Robert’s usual vibe. It was beyond seedy. He was also not a fan of it being so open about being a villain bar and nothing being done to shut it down. But he had bigger issues, so he wasn't planning on being a buzzkill. He ignored all the people intentionally shoulder checking him or fully getting into his way. He probably stood out like a sore thumb. 

𝅘𝅥𝅮 How I look? I look good. Would you wanna fuck me if you could? 𝅘𝅥𝅮

Not as much as Waterboy was, though. The man looked so out of place it wasn’t even funny. Especially seeing the bartender intentionally ignoring him. Robert handed him a glass of whiskey, the man awkwardly thanking him. Shit, he needed to get the kid some weed. Maybe that would get him to loosen up a little. Robert felt bad leaving him alone, but he had more drinks to hand out and he wouldn’t be doing the kid any favours if he kept babysitting him instead of letting him figure things out on his own. 

𝅘𝅥𝅮 How I look? I look bad. I’ll be the best you ever had.𝅘𝅥𝅮  

Next stop was Flambae. They arrived separately, their only interaction so far was a nod and a ‘hey’ across the room. From the looks of it, the man was too invested in picking out the perfect karaoke song to sit down with Robert. That was fine, they had the whole night to find time for each other. 

“Dude, be honest.” Flambae started talking when he noticed Robert approaching. “Am I gonna make a fool of myself if I sing Whitney Houston?” 

“Are you Whitney Houston?” Robert asked. 

“No.” 

“Then yeah, you will.” he responded while placing the drink on a nearby table. You had to have serious skill to pull off Whitney. And even then, you wouldn’t do her justice. 

“Fuck…he’s right” He heard Flambae muttering as he was leaving. 

𝅘𝅥𝅮 How I look? How I look? How I look? How I look?𝅘𝅥𝅮 

Both Sonar and Coupé thanked him for keeping them on the team, each in their own way. He was glad he put his foot down when Blond Blazer wanted him to cut one of them. Letting one of them go after the team started to work together and before he had a chance to really show improvement was such an awful idea. 

Coupé was less intimidating when drunk, her more friendly side finally showing. That didn’t mean she wasn’t still deadly and scarily competent. Robert pitied the people who thought playing darts with her was going to end well for them. Sonar was his usual self, trying to hustle some assholes at pool. Robert was pretty sure they weren’t buying it. 

𝅘𝅥𝅮 You’s a ugly motherfucker but you kawaii.𝅘𝅥𝅮  

It seemed weird that Golem couldn’t go inside. Sure, he was in fact ‘too damn big’, but not big enough not to fit into the bar. He seemed fine with it, chill as always,  but it didn’t sit right with Robert. He made a mental note to come outside once in a while and bring more drinks with him. 

𝅘𝅥𝅮 How I look? How I look? How I look? How I look?𝅘𝅥𝅮 

Prism seemed in her element, surrounded by one of the groups performing at the bar. She was engaged in a passionate conversation with them about things Robert didn’t have a clue about. He heard the words “followers”, “algorithm” or “engagement” and it all went over his head. 

𝅘𝅥𝅮 I ain’t gonna lie, you making my nose bleed. 𝅘𝅥𝅮 

Malevola was destroying everyone who had the nerve to ask a 6'6.6 literal demon to arm wrestle thinking they’d win. Some of them also thought they’d outdrink her. They all deserved what was coming for them. Some assholes just needed to be taken down a peg. 

𝅘𝅥𝅮 Hey, Hello Kitty, where that mouth at? Face hella pretty. What’s around back?𝅘𝅥𝅮 

Punch up was sitting near the dart board just watching Coupé wiping the floor with everyone, until she joined him and they started talking. Probably flirting. Robert wasn’t sure what was going on there. He heard they ‘used to’ date, but it didn’t look like that was in the past. 

𝅘𝅥𝅮 Lady in the street, but as a house cat, she a freak.𝅘𝅥𝅮  

That left Robert with just two drinks. One for him and the other for Invisigal who was sitting alone at a table, gesturing to him to go join her. 

Things between them were weird for a while. He thought they were on the same page and the over the top flirting, if you could call it that, was not serious. He thought she was just trying to make him uncomfortable at first to make him slip up, and later it turned into friendly, if inappropriate, banter. Kind of like a competition of who could say the more outrageous shit. Who goes with ‘I had a dream last night that we were fucking’ as an opening line with someone they are actually interested in? Well, Invisigal did. And Robert did himself no favours when he joined her in the cinema. He meant it as a friendly hang out, but in retrospect he should have realized that was not how it came across. He tried telling her it wasn’t a date and they could just be friends, but that was met with more innuendos and offers of casual sex. She took the hint eventually. He suspected the whole Flambae thing probably helped. He had high hopes they were finally becoming actual friends. 

Before he could head to her, the music quieted down and the karaoke started playing instead. Nothing could have prepared him for the singing that came with it. Flambae actually sounded decent, if it wasn’t for the words. 

𝅘𝅥𝅮I’m a bitch, my name is Robert, such a bitch whose name is Robert, I’m a bitch yeah I’m a bitch, I’m such a fucking bitch. I have no hopes, I have no dreams, and a tiny little peen, and it doesn’t even function anyway because I have erectiledysfunction.𝅘𝅥𝅮

Jesus Christ. What did he do to deserve this? Actually, no. This was exactly what he deserved. He made it to the table and sat down across from Invisigal. 

She gave him a look. “I have to ask. I thought the two of you were a thing now? He wouldn’t shut up about it in the chat”

“Allegedly.” Robert said, putting down the glasses and pushing one towards Invisigal.

𝅘𝅥𝅮So take me as I am. Just a tiny little bitch of a maaan.𝅘𝅥𝅮 

“So what is with the song about you being a bitch and having erectile dysfunction? You give him blue balls or something?” She grabbed the offered glass and took a sip. 

“I’m starting to think insulting me and making fun of my dick is his love language.” 

“That’s fucked up.” 

𝅘𝅥𝅮Rest assured that when I start to make you nervous and I’m going to extremes𝅘𝅥𝅮

“Not really.” Robert downed half of his drink. “I’ve had a girlfriend who texted me like every hour to tell me that she loved me or ask me what I was doing and expected me to answer. Every. Single. Time. I almost had a panic attack every time my phone rang. She thought it was sweet.“

𝅘𝅥𝅮Tomorrow I will change, and today won’t mean a thing. Poetry!𝅘𝅥𝅮

“She threw out all my junk food and meal prepped nothing but salads because she wanted me to be healthy. I was so miserable, I sneaked in snacks and hid the wrappers under the rest of the garbage. Who has to do that in their own apartment?” 

𝅘𝅥𝅮I’m a bitch, I’m a lover, I’m a child, I’m a mother, I’m a sinner and a saint, I do not feel ashamed. 𝅘𝅥𝅮

“She had a schedule on her fridge of when we should fuck. Color fucking coded.” He shuddered just thinking about it. There was no faster way to ruin a sexual relationship than to remove any spontaneity and make it feel like a chore. “That’s fucked up. I’ll take whatever dysfunctional bullshit he’s doing over that any day.” Robert finished his monologue, drinking the rest of his whiskey. God, he needed another one. 

“Wow.” Invisigal let out a stunned chuckle. “I don’t even know what to say to that. You need to raise your standards.” 

𝅘𝅥𝅮I’m your hell, I’m your dream, I’m nothing in between. You wouldn’t-wouldn’t-want-wan-any other. Tough. That’s tough for anybody. That’s like, that’s so hard. 𝅘𝅥𝅮

“Apparently I’m reaching and he’s settling.” Robert said, remembering the comment about at least putting effort in. 

“He would say that, sure.” She nodded. 

“You don’t think he’s right?” 

“I think you could do better.” She paused. “I think he knows that too. He’s not as confident as he likes people to believe.” Yeah, Robert got that impression as well. There were cracks in the overconfident image Flambae liked to portray. 

𝅘𝅥𝅮Just when you think you’ve got me figured out, oh I jumped early, my bad, the season’s already changing.𝅘𝅥𝅮

“Well, lucky for him, I’m not really looking anywhere else.” Robert had no desire to look for anyone ‘better’. 

“So it’s serious serious, huh?” She smirked at him.

“I don’t know, I don’t think it’s going to last long enough to be.” That was the unfortunate truth. “I think we’re aiming for short and explosive."

“Why wouldn’t it last? It kinda sounds like you’d like it to.“ 

𝅘𝅥𝅮I think it’s cool, you do what you doooo, and you don’t try to save meeee. So how long’s the save me?𝅘𝅥𝅮

“There’s just too much baggage we haven’t talked about. I think him breaking up with me is like best case scenario if we ever do. I’d get off so fucking easy if that’s all he does.” 

“That bad?” she sounded doubtful. 

“Whatever you’re imagining, multiply that by him burning me to a crisp and flushing my ashes down the toilet.” And that was probably still underestimating how mad Flambae would be. 

“Now you got me interested. Spill.”

𝅘𝅥𝅮I’m a bitch I, there we go, I’m lover,  everyoneknowsthat, I’m a child, I’m a mother. I’m a sinner, I’m a saint, I do not feel ashamed. 𝅘𝅥𝅮

“Okay, so you know that Flambae got busted and arrested a few years back, right?” She better, that was the whole reason he was in the Phoenix program in the first place. 

She nodded. 

“I did the busting.”

“Fuck, I didn’t realize that. But like maybe he will see it as turning his life around? He seems to be more or less happy working for SDN.” Invisigal would have a point, if that was all he did. 

𝅘𝅥𝅮I’m your hell, I’m your dream, I’m nothing in between. You know you wouldn’t want it any other way. Like Burger King - have it your way. 𝅘𝅥𝅮

“That’s not the worst part. I’m the reason he’s missing fingers, he lost them during the fight.“

“Shit. I thought he lost them working at a deli or something. Isn’t it like, super frowned upon for heroes to cause permanent damage?” She wasn’t wrong. It definitely wasn’t the wanted outcome of a fight. 

“Look, I’m not proud of it. But he had me backed into a corner. I’m not fireproof. It was either to let myself get cooked alive in the suit, or do something. He’s lucky he still has his arm. I could have aimed higher.”

𝅘𝅥𝅮I’m a BITCH. I’m a TEASE. I’m a GODDESS on my KNEES. When you get hurt, when you suffer, I’m your angel undercover.𝅘𝅥𝅮

Invisigal looked stunned for a second. “Now that’s fucked. Shit, out of the two of you, I didn’t expect you to be the problem. I assumed he would fuck up at some point and you’d drop him.”

Robert still wasn’t done. “Oh, and then there was this incident at Crypto where he was fucking with me and I kinda…”

“YOU stole his eyebrows?” 

“They burned off. Which somehow makes less sense than what you just said.“ Robert still hadn’t figured out how that worked. Flambae could literally set his whole body on fire and be fine, but a little alcohol in the mix and his hair would burn off? It made no sense. 

“Okay. Fuck. I was going to go on this whole speech about earning the team’s trust by telling them who you are, I heard them calling you a narc at the bar. But now I’m not sure that’s in your best interest. He’s going to kill you for not telling him.”  

“Yeah…I know.” 

Chapter Text

Robert splashed water on his face. He was exhilarated, he could feel the blood rushing through his body. He didn’t usually go looking for fights out of the suit, but fuck he needed that. It made him feel more alive than he has in a while.

He should be more concerned about what happened. He needed to talk to Visi in private later. It was clear the Red Ring was not there for him, and the way T-Rex arms was talking to her, they had history. He knew logically that his entire team was full of ex villains. He just didn’t like to be faced with proof of it. He was at least reasonably sure her connection to the Red Ring and possibly Shroud was in the past though, they didn’t seem happy with her. She did join the Phoenix program of her own volition, so maybe she got tired of that life. Still, they needed to talk. As much as he didn’t want to pry, her past was clearly catching up to her.

That could wait though. The important thing was that the entire team was fine. They were all beat up and exhausted, but they wiped the floor with the Red Ring members. Robert held his own even without the suit. He knew he fought dirty, but that’s what you need to do when you’re at a disadvantage. And he didn’t feel even slightly bad about what he did. He tried his best to not use excessive force as Mecha Man. No permanent injuries if possible and mostly a fair, clean fight. But as Robert, he didn’t have the luxury to hold back. Nor was he under the same scrutiny. And the word ‘scrappy’ has been used in the past to describe him.

He looked in the mirror. Yeah, he was going to be black and blue tomorrow. There was already a bruise forming on the side of his face. He at least washed away the blood, not that it was his. He gargled some water, spitting it out. That helped get the metallic taste from his mouth. He saw the bathroom door opening behind him, Flambae walking in and locking the door.

“Waterboy is ordering us food. I’m supposed to text him your order. What do you want?” the man asked, not looking up from his phone.

“Three triple crunch tacos and a drink. Might as well do 3 am Mexican food right.” Robert said, turning towards Flambae.

“Whatever you say.” Flambae typed his order and then put his phone away. Robert had no idea where he kept it in his suit. “You okay?” he finally looked up at Robert. “I thought I would have to save your scrawny ass in there, but it looks like you did ok. I mean you got beat up and almost died many, many times. But still not bad for a normie.”

Robert smiled. He would take the compliment, even if it was wrapped in insults. He was beginning to learn how Flambae communicated and which parts of what he said were important. “I’m fine. Just a few bruises. What about you?”

Flambae stepped closer, backing Robert into the sink. “Don’t worry about me, unlike you I didn’t take any punches.” He gently cupped Robert’s jaw, angling his face up. “You do look pretty all beaten up.”

“That’s definitely not a concerning thing to say.” Robert audibly swallowed.

Flambae ignored his comment and continued. “You surprised me. I didn’t expect a goody two shoes like you to fight so dirty. It’s doing things to me.” He leaned closer, openly staring at the other man’s lips.

Robert gave Flambae an unimpressed look, immediately catching on. “We are not fucking in a Del Taco bathroom. I don’t even want to imagine the things that go on in here.”

“You shouldn’t be imagining anything when you could be looking at me.”

Robert groaned. “This is a public bathroom. And our entire team is outside.” His protests sounded pretty unconvincing even to his ears.

“It’s 3 am. The door is locked. I think we’ll be ok.” Flambae closed the gap between them and placed a soft kiss on Robert's lips. “And the others have enough issues to worry about us. We’ll be quick.”

“Fuck, fine.” Robert agreed, mostly because he was pent up himself. He was still feeling the high from the fight and this would be a great way to release it. “But you’re only getting a blow job. I am not taking my clothes off in here.”

“Works for me. Just don’t bite my dick off, okay? I saw what you did to the snake dude.” Flambae grabbed Robert’s ass and lifted him up to sit on the sink counter, stepping between his legs.

“I think he was meant to be more of a dragon than a snake? I mean he breathed fire.”

“I don’t fucking care.” Flambae went in for a proper kiss this time, grinding his hips into Robert.

They spent a few moments like that, just melting into the kiss, rocking against each other, slowly getting harder. The pressure of his cock straining against his pants was getting too much for Robert, but Flambae finally worked his hand between their bodies and went for Robert’s zipper, pulling his cock out and giving it a few strokes. He then pulled away from the kiss, getting on his knees.

“Try to keep quiet, unless you want someone to know what’s happening in here.” He grabbed Robert by the hips and pulled him closer to the edge of the counter. Robert shivered and sucked in a hissed breath. He could feel the man’s hot breath against him before Flambae pressed a kiss against the tip of his cock, then licked a stripe along his entire length.

“Fuck, that’s easier said than done.” Robert said, breathless.

Instead of responding, Flambae fully took him into his mouth, swirling his tongue around. Robert had to bite down on his own fist to stop the moan from coming out. The velvety heat felt amazing. He looked down at Flambae, the man holding his gaze. Shit. That was an incredible sight. Flambae was taking Robert's cock deep, bobbing his head up and down.

Very soon Robert was nearing his finish, the feeling of Flambae’s throat around him driving him crazy. “I’m…I’m close.”

Flambae seemed to take that as a challenge, sucking even harder, taking Robert’s entire cock down to the root. It was unbearable, the pressure in Robert’s gut building up.

“Chad…I’m cumming.” Robert warned the other man, the pleasure becoming too much. Flambae took Robert's cock as deep as he could, swallowing every last drop of his cum before pulling off.

“Fuck. That was…amazing.” Robert had trouble catching his breath. “Give me a second and I’ll return the favour.”

Flambae didn’t give him a second, standing up and pulling him back into a searing kiss. He grabbed Robert’s hips again, this time pulling him off the counter. Robert’s legs almost buckled underneath him.

Flambae broke the kiss. “Come on, get on your knees.”

Robert sank down. He wanted to go for Flambae’s pants, but the man slapped his hand away and unbuttoned them himself. He didn’t waste time pulling out his cock. Before Robert could collect himself and get to work, Flambae cradled his face, pulling it closer to his crotch.

“Open up.” he instructed.

Of course this was how he wanted it to go. Robert rolled his eyes but did as he was asked. Less work for him. He grabbed the back of the other man’s thighs to hold himself in place.

Flambae didn’t hesitate and pushed his cock in, not even attempting to ease Robert into it. Fuck, he was big. Robert tried to relax as much as he could. He wouldn’t give the asshole the satisfaction of choking. Luckily the man was starting out with slow, shallow thrusts. This Robert could do. He probably wasn’t expected to do much in this situation, but he couldn’t help himself. He made sure to run his tongue over the underside of Flambae’s cock and hollow out his cheeks.

Flambae’s thrusts faltered. “Shit, Rob.” He clutched the back of Robert’s head, holding it in place. Then he began really fucking his mouth. “You’re doing so good.”

Robert made sure to keep his throat relaxed, no longer attempting to do anything but take it. He hoped the grunting coming from Flambae could not be heard outside the bathroom. Flambae’s cock was brutally hitting the back of his throat. He felt spit dripping down his chin. God, this was so messy.

“Can I…Is it okay if I don’t pull out?” Flambae was intently watching him. His eyes hadn’t left Robert this entire time.

All Robert could do is hold eye contact with him and squeeze his thigh. He hoped that would get the message across. The sooner the better, his jaw was starting to ache. Flambae’s pace was wavering, it wouldn’t be long.

“Fuck…baby….” And then Flambae was cumming, Robert’s throat flooded by his release. He swallowed it all, pulling away and letting the spent cock slip out of his mouth.

He sat back on his heels, watching his handiwork. Flambae looked wrecked. Good to know he still got it.