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Chapter Text

Jimin shifts from foot to foot, tightening his grip on his briefcase, then adjusts his tie and presses the doorbell. He hears a pleasant chime and voices from behind the tall wooden gates. A dog barks, followed by the sound of quick footsteps. Finally, the gates open, revealing a stern-faced guard in an impeccably tailored suit that looks more expensive than all of Jimin's clothes put together.

"Hello," the guest bows uncertainly. "I'm Park Jimin from Yonsei University. I've come for the tutoring session."

The guard merely gives a stern nod and ushers the visitor into a spacious garden. As Jimin walks along the perfectly paved stone path towards the enormous house, he is constantly accompanied by the scent of bushes and the singing of birds, complementing the already flawless scene.

The house is cool and quiet. The only sound is the soft ticking of a clock, and Jimin nervously swallows. He had never felt so out of place before, not even when he entered one of the country's most prestigious universities, ninety percent filled with children from wealthy families. Now, he feels like he might dirty things just by touching them, so when the housekeeper greets him and offers a refreshment, Jimin awkwardly declines. Mrs. Lee merely purses her lips and says:

"I will take you to the student."

It's even quieter upstairs, almost lifeless, and seemingly even cleaner. The woman knocks on one of the doors near the staircase and, without waiting for an answer, lets the teacher into the room. It's empty inside. Jimin takes a couple of steps into the spacious, sunlit room and wonders if he should sit at the desk and start unpacking his things. But for now, he just looks around. The room matches the rest of the house: modern, stylish, filled with expensive furniture. And just as lifeless. There are no posters or photographs on the walls, no figurines or non-required books on the shelves, not a single personal item on the bedside table. There's nothing on it at all, except for a lamp. If Jimin hadn't been brought here to tutor a student, he would have thought it was a guest room.

However, when the bathroom door swings open abruptly, making the guest startle, he remembers that there are, after all, inhabitants in this house.

"Hello," the student bows quickly and lazily walks over to the desk. Jimin becomes even more confused.

"Hello," he also bows. "I'm Park Jimin, a student at Yonsei University. I'll be your English tutor."

The student doesn't respond, and Jimin, hesitating for a couple of seconds, decides to sit down anyway. As he pulls books out of his briefcase, the student doesn’t spare him one glance, and the tense atmosphere begins to press down even harder.

"What's your name?" Park finally dares to ask, realizing he can't act like a doormat.

The student sighs, as if even such a simple question irritates him, but still answers:

"Jeon Jungkook."

"Well, Jeon Jungkook, since there isn't much time left before the exam, we need to focus. Have you studied English at a hagwon before?"

Jungkook moves his head, as if swatting away an imaginary fly, and Jimin frowns. It seems these months are going to be long. What a student he's got...

"Then let's start by assessing your level." Jimin pulls a sheet of paper from his folder and places it in front of Jungkook. The latter sighs again and peels himself from the back of the chair, picking up a pen only after about five seconds. Jimin feels a wave of icy irritation spread through his body, but doesn't show it. He moves slightly closer to the student and observes his actions. But with each passing minute, it becomes clearer that Jungkook is mostly guessing the answers. It seems he isn't even trying to think. "Do you even know any English?!"

This time, his tone isn't as calm, and Jimin is met with a piercing gaze from dark eyes. It cuts right through Park, taking his breath away and dispelling his anger. Jungkook isn't looking at him friendly. His eyebrows draw together, and his body turns slightly towards Jimin, as if preparing to defend itself, but the teacher doesn't continue his attack.

"Not really," Jungkook answers indifferently, and Jimin would have gotten angry again if he weren't still so thrown off.

"Okay, then let's start with something simpler."

He rummages in his briefcase again and, after a long search, fishes out another sheet.

"This, I think, you can do. Just insert the correct verb."

Jungkook does it. He reads the sentences slowly, and Jimin notes with relief that the guy's pronunciation is quite good. He also makes almost no mistakes, and the teacher happily places a sheet with more difficult exercises in front of him. However, a heavy sigh, showing a complete unwillingness to study, brings the teacher back down to earth.

The rest of the lesson passes in the same manner, and Jimin leaves the house completely drained. Realizing he can't go to his next student in such a mood, he takes out his phone and calls his best friend."How was the lesson?" Hoseok asks straight away. "Did they really pay you a hundred dollars?"

"Seems like pocket change for them," Jimin replies tiredly, walking slowly down the street in the shade of sprawling trees peeking over fences. "You should see their house, hyung! And if it weren't for the money, I don't think I'd agree to a second lesson."

"Is it that bad?"

"I never thought an hour of English tutoring could be more exhausting than half a day of dancing!"

Hoseok would definitely understand that analogy. After all, they met in a dance class. Jimin used to take dancing quite seriously and poured all his energy into training, but after his parents' business failed, he had to come back down to earth and consider a career that would bring in money.

"Really? Is he that dumb?" his friend laughs, and Jimin exhales noisily.

"If only that were the problem! He's so lazy, arrogant, and rude that his every action shows he doesn't want to be there! For the whole hour, he dragged out his words, rolled his eyes, and sighed! Okay, fine, you don't want to be here because daddy already has a cozy spot saved for you in some holding company, but have some respect for the person who came to spend their time on you!" Jimin practically shouts.

"I feel for you, man," Hoseok says understandingly. "If you were in Busan, I'd treat you to soju and listen for hours as you trash that insufferable rich kid... Are you coming this weekend?"

"I have classes, can't make it."

"I hope not with equally enthusiastic students," his friend jokes, and Jimin smiles.

When he hangs up, he feels a little better. Talking to a loved one and venting his frustration have improved his mood, and Jimin easily switches his focus to the next lesson. However, neither the student who welcomed him warmly nor the engaging conversation about the influence of American cinema can make Jimin forget the eyes of his arrogant tutee.

Chapter Text

They have lessons four times a week, and at each session, Jungkook makes it perfectly clear to Jimin that he wants no part of it. They struggle through grammar, barely practice speaking because not a single word can be coaxed out of the student, have a hard time grasping the logic of the exam tasks, and only manage somewhat decently in listening comprehension. And each time, it becomes harder for the teacher to contain his righteous anger. He feels an overwhelming urge to slap some sense into this ill-mannered brat. The guy infuriates him beyond belief!

"If you continue with this level of 'enthusiasm,' you won't pass the Suneung," Jimin finally snaps during their Friday lesson. The day had been tough. He'd been up all night working on a university assignment, then sat through three difficult lectures and taught three extra lessons. The last thing he needed was the dissatisfied sighs of this lazy little bastard!

However, Jimin's anger doesn't shame Jungkook; it only provokes further irritation. He lifts his contemptuous gaze to Jimin again and retorts:

"You think I care?"

Jimin is stunned by such audacity. He didn't almost kill himself while studying for university entrance exams, give up his passion, and move to a different city for this... He achieved what he strived for; he's a student at a SKY university. Parents of potential students are dying to employ him! Enough is enough; it's time he knew his own worth!

"And you think you're hiding your contempt so well?" Jimin raises his voice. "If you don't need any of this, I certainly don't! Do you think just because your daddy pays me those damned hundred dollars, I'll grovel at your feet? You are the embodiment of what's wrong with our society! An arrogant heir who couldn't care less about those beneath him! Yes, they'll find you a good job, but unfortunately, it won't make you a good person. You're just a disgrace to your parents! And to you, I am 'Teacher Park', don't you dare use informal speech with me, I'm two years older!"

Jimin jumps up from his chair and starts frantically gathering his things. If Jungkook wants to continue, he can call and apologize; if not, good riddance! He'll find another student. Jimin is already fastening his briefcase when he decides to take one last look at Jungkook. The student's hands are clenched into tense fists, and Jimin thinks he's about to lunge and punch him with all his might—and there's certainly plenty of might in that body: even baggy sweaters can't hide the prominent muscles. Who knows, maybe the guy is a real bully who beats up anyone he dislikes at school? Then Jimin should definitely refuse to help him.

But when a tear falls onto one of those fists, Jimin's rage pops like a soap bubble.

Park looks closer in disbelief, confirming it wasn't his imagination, and then puts his briefcase back on the table.

Is he crying? Crying??? Because of his words? Does this arrogant brat actually have a conscience? It's hard to believe... Jimin glances again at the clenched fists and notices another large tear falling, adding to the small trickle running down his arm.

"If you think you can't do it, that's not true..." Jimin begins awkwardly, trying to encourage the student. What the hell is going on?

But then Jungkook stands up abruptly, pushing his chair back with an unpleasant scraping sound, and quickly disappears into the bathroom. Jimin doesn't know what to do. He stands there waiting for a couple of minutes, then, deciding Jungkook isn't coming back out, picks up his things and goes downstairs.

"Is something wrong?" the housekeeper asks, coming out of the kitchen. "You finished early."

"I'm not sure I'm the right teacher for Jeon Jungkook," Jimin starts, almost guiltily. "Perhaps I should speak with his parents about continuing the lessons."

"Well, I'll convey that to his grandfather," Mrs. Lee replies, clasping her hands near her stomach.

"His grandfather is in charge of his education?" Jimin clarifies.

"Yes," the housekeeper sighs. "Jungkook's parents passed away a few months ago, and he moved in with his grandfather. Please forgive him if anything is amiss. He's having a very hard time with the changes."

Mrs. Lee finishes speaking, and Jimin feels a hot, suffocating wave of shame wash over him. He just told a grieving son that he was a disgrace to his parents. God, if only the ground could swallow him whole... What a fool he is! What an absolute fool!

Swallowing hard and almost backing away, Jimin bows several times in farewell and practically runs out of the house. He only stops at the gates and turns around, searching for the window of Jungkook's room with his eyes. He doesn't even know how he could apologize, but the guilt weighs on him, forcing him to face reality. It's as if Jimin hopes to see the student again, to remind himself once more of the pain he caused. Idiot.

"How could you have known?!" Hoseok says as soon as Jimin explains the situation. "If dead parents were the only reason for people acting like jerks, there would be almost no bad people in the world."

"Still, I jumped to conclusions. I didn't even ask or try to find out."

"As if he would have told you!"

"Still. What made me think I had the right to judge without knowing the circumstances?"

"Listen," his friend sighs, "I get it, but trauma doesn't give him the right to treat you like trash."

"He didn't exactly..." Jimin says, more to himself. "He was just lazy."

What, essentially, did Jungkook do to him? He wasn't even rude. Yes, he spoke disrespectfully, dropping the formal speech, but did that give Park the right to snap like that? No. The only truly rude person here was Jimin. And now he wants to kick himself.

But how can he fix this? Apologize and then continue torturing the guy? If he had lost his parents, he wouldn't be in the mood for lessons either. What can he do? He wonders if this dunce even has any friends.

"You do understand he's not your responsibility, right?" Hoseok replies when Jimin shares his thoughts. "You're not obligated to fuss over him. Of course, he's not up for studying right now. Let him see a psychologist, let his grandfather remember his grandson's needs... How are you supposed to help him?"

"I don't know. I'll figure it out. But I definitely can't just leave it like this."

"Ah, Jimin, you have a heart that's too kind for your own good," Hoseok laughs sadly. "Which is why I love you."

The next lesson isn't until Monday, and Jimin spends the entire weekend thinking about Jungkook. Guilt gnaws at him from the inside, sympathy squeezes his heart, and his mind tirelessly searches for a way to help. Maybe not with the wretched English, but at least with the grief. Jimin replays the past week in his memory again and again and realizes that Jungkook is most likely depressed. Of course, Park isn't a doctor or even a psychologist, so he can't diagnose him, but everything screams about how unhappy the guy is: apathy, lack of focus, irritability, sadness, low energy... Jimin still hopes it's only temporary and that Jungkook doesn't actually have a clinical condition. Seeing a young, healthy, handsome guy in a state of complete indifference just doesn't seem right.

So when Monday arrives, he once again stands before the wide gates with a wildly beating heart and a ridiculous idea. The only thing that always made him happy was music. And so, Jimin spent almost all of Sunday researching American and British rap, looking for songs that could expand the student's vocabulary and lift his sunken spirits.

When Jimin enters Jungkook's room, the latter is already sitting at the desk and turns to look at the teacher in surprise, meeting his eyes. For the first time, he isn't looking at him hostilely or indifferently, and Jimin's heartbeat quickens even more. His eyes are so beautiful... If only he could see him smile...

"I thought you weren't coming," Jungkook says politely, and Jimin freezes. He feels like he would have tripped if there was anything to trip over.

He takes an awkward step forward, gripping his briefcase tightly again, and says:

"I wanted to apologize. I had no right to say all those things..."

"You were right," Jungkook interrupts and shrugs.

"Maybe. But I was also wrong. So let's just leave all that in the past, okay?" Jimin smiles and takes his seat. "I thought we could do the lesson a little differently today. Do you like rap?"

Jungkook gives the teacher a surprised look and, for the first time, reminds Jimin of an innocent child. Of course, the guy is already nineteen*, but he's still a high school student. Still a teenager who lost his parents. Jimin misses his own parents terribly, but he can call them anytime.

"Maybe..." the student answers uncertainly. "I used to dance, and I danced to hip-hop too."

"You used to dance?" Jimin exclaims too loudly, and Jungkook raises his eyebrows, looking at the teacher as if he's insane. "Sorry, it's just... I used to dance too. Though that was almost four years ago."

"You quit?"

"I had to." Jimin looks away at the sprawling tree outside the window and tries not to think about living the rest of his life without what he truly loves. "I had to focus on studying to get into university and teach blockheads like you," Jimin says with a kind chuckle, and suddenly notices the corner of Jungkook's mouth lift, revealing a hint of a smile. And Park can't look away.

"I had to, too. But I don't think I'll ever get as far as you."

These words surprise him. Jungkook placed Jimin above himself? All last week, the teacher felt like the student barely considered him human. Perhaps he was completely wrong about him.

"You have good potential. You just have to want it," Jimin says honestly.

"That's the problem," Jungkook concludes sadly.

"Well, let's see if we can solve it."

Jimin pulls two sets of wireless headphones from his briefcase—one of which he borrowed from his roommate—and starts playing music on his phone. Jungkook skeptically puts the earpiece in and listens. Unfortunately, the music doesn't evoke any emotion in him besides boredom, and Jimin anxiously switches the song.

"Maybe this one?"

The student shrugs but listens obediently, ready to complete any task. But that's not Jimin's goal right now. At this moment, he couldn't care less if Jungkook can correctly fill in the words for the exercise he prepared based on the song—he just wants to cheer him up. He just wants to see even a shadow of a smile again.

"Or this one?"

But the result is the same. This happens with the next four songs, after which a nearly desperate Jimin plays a comical track he'd only added because he liked it himself.

And it's this one that makes Jungkook smile. A smile like Jimin has never seen before. His whole face lights up, and a dazzling smile appears for a few unforgettable seconds. Jungkook seems like a completely different person. Simple, cheerful, kind. Even funny. So bright that Jimin can't help but smile widely himself, completely captivated by the student's reaction.

"Now, come on, show me how to dance to this." Jimin stands up, inviting Jungkook to join him with his eyes.

The upbeat song doesn't allow the student to sink back into his depressed state, and he slowly rises. Jimin watches carefully, praying to all the gods that Jungkook doesn't change his mind. But he doesn't return to his chair: he walks to the middle of the room and makes a couple of sharp, silly moves. Jimin bursts out laughing. Jungkook repeats them.

"Now you," his voice carries a challenge, as if asking if the teacher who laughed at him can do better. And Jimin happily obliges. His movements aren't sharp: on the contrary, they're overly smooth and exaggerated, which makes Jungkook laugh genuinely, suddenly sending shivers down Jimin's spine. Seeing this withdrawn, apathetic guy dancing and laughing is a true delight.

They continue their silly movements for the entire song, and when it ends, they collapse into their chairs, out of breath.

"Damn, I don't even have an exercise for this song," Jimin laments, and Jungkook just shrugs contentedly.

Chapter Text

They continue their silly movements for the entire song, and when it ends, they collapse into their chairs, out of breath.

"Damn, I don't even have an exercise for this song," Jimin laments, and Jungkook just shrugs contentedly.

All the next day, Jimin can't wait for his lesson with his impossible student. He plans the session, deciding what would be best to do, and his mind constantly drifts back to Jungkook's dazzling smile. Park never imagined the guy could be so carefree and attractive, though, admittedly, even in his sullen state, he hadn't been able to completely lose his natural charm.

Jimin sighs deeply. He needs to get a grip. He got what he wanted, good for him, but he probably shouldn't be thinking so much about his student's eyes, smile, and movements. That is what's truly inappropriate—thoughts not directly related to the lessons. Encouraging someone who needs it is one thing; paying so much attention to his attractiveness is quite another.

However, the moment Jimin steps over the threshold into Jungkook's room, these noble intentions fly out the window. Turning to the tutor, the student smiles and stands to greet him, sending warmth flooding through Jimin's chest.

"Are we going to dance today too?" Jungkook asks timidly, but with undeniable hope in his eyes. "We can pick any song, and I'll learn all the vocabulary from it."

Jimin hesitates. He really doesn't want to refuse the student, who, for the first time, has shown interest in something, but they can't dedicate all their English lessons to dancing either.

"Let's do this: we'll talk first, then read the song lyrics with a full vocabulary breakdown, and then dance?" Jungkook smiles happily, and Jimin returns it. There really is a delightful boyishness about this guy. A certain innocence that he managed to preserve through all the pain, and it's incredibly charming.

When Jimin takes his seat, Jungkook turns to face him fully for the first time, looking him directly in the eyes, ready to engage with any topic proposed.

"We can talk about dance," Jimin switches to English. "How long did you do it for?"

"Five years," Jungkook answers. "I went to a studio in Busan, but after moving, my grandfather doesn't want me to continue."

"In Busan?" Jimin is astonished. He's confused and checks if he's finally lost his mind. How could he not have realized Jungkook was from Busan too? "But I don't hear an accent."

"The first thing my grandfather did after I moved was hire a teacher to rid me of the Busan dialect. He can't stand anything related to that city," Jungkook concludes, lowering his gaze to his hands clasped on his knees. Jimin can't tell if the student is angry at his grandfather or just sad, but he himself doesn't find it surprising that the head of the family would hate the city that took his loved ones from him.

"You know, I'm from there too," Jimin chuckles, and Jungkook's interested gaze snaps back to the teacher, "and I intentionally got rid of my accent as soon as I entered university. I didn't want people making fun of me; I don't fit in that well as it is."

"Really? Where did you live?" Jungkook asks, practically bouncing in his chair, and it turns out their homes were only half an hour apart. The studios they trained at had even met at competitions a few times, but the guys had never seen each other before. "What if we actually crossed paths at one of those events?"

It's true. Imagining they could have met under completely different circumstances is incredibly thrilling, and Jimin decides not to dwell on such thoughts.

They talk for a long time about their hometown, discussing favorite places, and Jimin concludes that they both terribly miss Busan.

"What I miss most is the sea," Park sighs, and Jungkook nods in understanding. "The Han River is just not the same."

"For me, it's my favorite cafe. It was called 'At Grandma's,' and there was this lovely ajumma who made the most incredible jajangmyeon. My friends and I often went there after school and stayed until evening, and she was always so happy to see us! She always wanted to set me up with her granddaughter!" Jungkook laughs, and Jimin realizes that the guy was robbed not only of his closest family but also of a city full of friends. He doesn't know if the grandfather did it intentionally or had no choice, but a certain anger still creeps into his heart. Mr. Jeon ripped his grandson out of his old world and buried him in studies, not giving him a moment to breathe.

"Alright, let's dance," the teacher says, pushing away the gloomy thoughts, and Jungkook's eyes light up.

"What about the vocabulary?"

"To hell with it! Show me what you've got."

The guys get up from their chairs and move to the middle of the room, putting in their earbuds and selecting a song.

"How about this one?" Jungkook suggests.

"I even know the dance to this."

"Me too."

The song starts playing, and Jungkook transforms. There's no trace of his former laziness or yesterday's goofiness. Now, there is a person who loves what he's doing with his whole heart. He moves as if telling the most intimate story, and it's utterly impossible to look away. Precise, perfected movements, a captivating gaze, a mysterious smile—in this Jungkook, there's not a trace of the half-dead boy who listlessly responded to the teacher's questions. Now, there is a young man who knows what he wants and is confident in himself and his sexuality. And the latter is undeniable, which is why the incredibly vivid desire to be held in his strong arms completely overwhelms Jimin.

He only realizes he's been staring unabashedly when the song ends and Jungkook pouts, complaining that the teacher didn't join him.

"Now you have to show me what you can do. Since you were just standing there judging my whole dance," Jungkook challenges, and Jimin decides not to mention that he simply forgot the plan.

Fast-paced songs were never his strong suit, so Park chooses a slower one and lets Jungkook watch. He moves deliberately but with all his soul, only in the process realizing just how much he has truly missed dancing: the chance to lose himself in the music, to express himself and his feelings. When it's over, there's a lump in his throat, and Jimin turns away from the student's intense gaze.

"You dance really cool," Jungkook says, sounding slightly surprised. "Seriously, just amazing. I'd like to learn from you."

"I could learn from you," Jimin chuckles.

"Then let's learn together."

And so they do. They dance, enjoying their shared passion and inspiring each other. They catch each other's gaze and smile because they can share this wonderful moment. English takes a back seat, but both eagerly await every session. Jimin flies to his student's house, imagining how they'll recreate another choreography, and Jungkook unfailingly completes all his assignments, just so his grandfather won't have any reason to criticize the teacher. And with each meeting, they learn more about each other. Jimin already knows all of Jungkook's favorite songs. He knows what fruits he prefers and what time of day he finds most inspiring; what games he loved as a child and the strange, yet utterly endearing sounds he makes when he's bored. He remembers the contours of his body and the moles on his face. He loves his laugh and the emotions it stirs within him. He understands that he truly enjoys life only when he's near Jungkook, and he realizes that such feelings are completely inappropriate. But he can't help himself.

On a hot July day, Mrs. Lee places glasses of cool refreshments in front of the boys and leaves the room, and Jungkook turns to Jimin. He takes a nervous breath and then says:

"You will keep coming during the holidays, right?"

Jimin studies Jungkook and bites his lip. His student is so adorable… Why is he so adorable that Jimin has to fight the urge to pull him close every single day? And how could he ever have thought him cold and arrogant? In the Jungkook he knows, there's nothing like that. Not a trace. Only sincerity and an incredibly pure soul.

"I can't," Jimin replies, trying not to sound too upset. "I'm going home for the break."

Jungkook's gaze dims, and Jimin rushes to encourage him:

"You can dance without me. If you start missing my critical assessments, just send me videos," he smiles, but the student only offers a sad smile in return.

"I'll be waiting for your return," is all he says, scorching Jimin with a bold, persistent look that makes his heart tremble.

A break from Jungkook will definitely do him good. Jimin should clear his head, cool off a bit, get some distance… so he stops seeing him in his dreams and stops having his breath taken away every time he's gifted that dazzling smile.

Chapter Text

Jungkook pushes back the edge of his blanket and fixes his gaze on the grey ceiling. Normal people enjoy their holidays, but he feels like life has suddenly lost all the color he'd so painstakingly added to it over the last couple of months. Today, he has three lessons with private tutors and is stuck at home. What a wonderful prospect!

As soon as Jimin stops coming to see him, all the joy evaporates again. It has only been three days, but Jungkook already feels like taking a train to Busan. Yet, the mere thought of setting foot on those familiar streets sends a chill down his spine. It feels like an eternity since he's been there, even though he still sees those streets in his dreams every night. Or maybe this is all a dream..? A terrifying, bone-chilling nightmare he is desperate to wake up from. Only one detail doesn't fit, confirming reality—Jimin. For that, Jungkook both hates and adores him. If it weren't for the teacher, maybe Jungkook could fully withdraw into himself and drown in this dream, emerging on the other, real side, where his parents are still alive. But Jimin stubbornly pulls Jeon back to life, reminding him there are still things left to love.

It is only during their sessions that Jungkook can feel like his old self. He forgets that outside the window is a hostile, cruel world that mercilessly swallows everything he holds dear. Only during their lessons can he be himself and simply do what his soul yearns for.

And he hadn't liked Jimin at all at first. He seemed boring, overly proper, cold, even a bit insecure. But the moment Jungkook saw him dance… He still gets goosebumps just from the memory. When Jimin dances, he is a completely different person. Jungkook supposes it is the same for both of them. They are two guys who've been deprived of the chance to do what they love. They understand each other. Sometimes, Jungkook feels Jimin is the only one who truly understands him. Who sees right through him. It feels like he cannot deceive Park Jimin at all. Jimin only has to look at him, and he notices everything Jungkook is trying to hide. He has this ability to draw out of people what they are concealing, be it a confession or a character trait. And now, Jungkook terribly misses that penetrating gaze.

The day drags on unbearably long. Jungkook spends all his time cramming relentlessly, but he still cannot concentrate. As it turns out, boring text before his eyes is fertile ground for indulging in more thrilling memories. During his lessons, he is as "active" and "interested" as ever, making his tutors sigh and roll their eyes. But Jungkook just mentally shrugs. He would be glad to regain his motivation, but right now studying seems so insignificant that he doesn't even try. Frankly, he doesn't care how his life turns out: whether he'll be a convenience store clerk or a manager at a large company. Both options seem equally joyless.

By the fifth day, he feels like smashing his head against his textbooks. The dance lessons with Jimin were the only thing pulling him out of the swamp of bitterness and grief he is starting to sink into again. So, after finishing his lessons for the day, Jungkook decides to dance by himself. Sure, it isn't as fun alone, but what is stopping him from enjoying his passion? Finding the right song, Jungkook stands before the mirror and loses himself in the melody. For just four minutes, his problems are far away again. He is simply living the music again, though he notes how much his technique has suffered from the lack of regular practice. But expressing his feelings through dance is something Jungkook has always truly loved. He is never a great orator, and his essays are frankly terrible, so it has always been easier for him to speak without words. It is through dance that he can convey love and hatred. It is how he can pour out everything, tearing him up inside.

"What are you doing?" his grandfather's stern voice sounds from behind, making Jungkook startle and turn towards the door. He pulls out his earbuds and steps back awkwardly.

"Dancing."

"Are you a top student already?" his grandfather asks disapprovingly, raising an eyebrow.

"No, but I studied all day…" Guilt hits him painfully, but a rebellious discontent still gathers in his chest.

"You should be studying day and night, Jungkook! With grades like yours, you'll only get into some no-name college! My grandson cannot disgrace me like this." His grandfather straightens up and lifts his chin, giving Jungkook a displeased look. He resembles a military commander inspecting his troops before a major battle. "Your mother completely neglected your education…"

He shakes his head, and Jungkook feels as if he's been doused in icy, slimy filth.

"Don't talk about Mom like that," he warns, and his grandfather lifts his chin even higher.

"So now I can't speak about the woman who destroyed my family?"

"She didn't destroy anything," Jungkook exclaims, clenching his fists. His heart is beating wildly, his head starting to spin. "They just fell in love, Grandfather. What was their crime?! They just loved each other and were happy!"

"Yes, we can see how happy they were!" the man snaps, making his grandson flinch again. "Your mother's free-spirited nature led to her son being a failure and her husband being in the grave! Just like herself!"

Jungkook only realizes hot tears are streaming down his cheeks when he sits down on the bed. His grandfather has left, but the walls are still spinning. He doesn't know what he is feeling. Indignation? Pain? Rage? A wild desire to shake his relative, horrified by the injustice of his words? Jungkook doesn't know, but he feels like he is suffocating. He literally cannot get enough air, so on trembling legs, he goes to the window and sticks his head out, inhaling the evening air. Nature is calm: the moon shines in the sky, and insects chirp in the grass. But Jungkook doesn't feel part of this world. He is superfluous here. He doesn't belong.

So where does he belong? Does such a place even exist anymore? Even in Busan, there is nothing left but painful memories.

But at least they are there. And Jimin is there.

Jungkook doesn't think too hard when he hastily packs a backpack, takes his remaining pocket money, and, having waited until everyone is asleep, leaves the house. He is running away. But right now, it feels as if he doesn't; he will simply suffocate. Reaching the station, Jeon boards the last train and goes to the place where there is still air.

***

He arrives at one in the morning and is immediately faced with the consequences of his rash decision. Jungkook takes out his wallet, counts the money, and realizes it will barely last a couple of days. A return ticket is out of the question. Suddenly, the wonderful prospect of becoming homeless and truly fulfilling his grandfather's words about being a failure opens up before him. But somehow, that future still seems more pleasant than life in that suffocating house. Here, at least, there is the sea.

He will go to the sea.

Somehow, Jungkook makes it to the beach. He counts his visibly dwindling money again and smirks, sitting down on a damp piece of driftwood. He used to have friends… But right now, he doesn't want to call any of them. Just imagining having to explain himself and beg for a place to stay makes him grimace. In his childhood, he'd been too competitive to make good friends, but it hadn't bothered him back then. Who knew he'd end up on the streets one day?!

But he can still breathe easier.

After snacking on some kimbap bought nearby, Jungkook goes for a walk. He wanders the streets full of memories, watches people whose lives continue on their course, imagines what would have happened if not for that fateful evening… He walks, looking at houses and trees, bursting into tears and feeling a warmth spreading in his chest. His heart aches, he wants to fall to his knees and sob, but Jungkook still wouldn't trade this moment for anything—the chance to feel at home again, in a place that had belonged to the three of them.

When "At Grandma's" opens, Jungkook is already waiting at the door. The owner exclaims in surprise upon seeing him, and Jungkook smiles at the old acquaintance. Somehow, she really has always been like a grandmother to him, her kind gaze and caring bustling calming him and promising that everything will be alright. Jungkook orders jajangmyeon and eats while watching seagulls fly past the large window, until exhaustion overcomes him and he falls asleep right on the low wooden table.

"Jungkook…" a distant, gentle voice sounds, but sleep refuses to release him. It fights for Jungkook's attention, intertwining with reality, and he feels like Jimin is next to him again. He smiles with the corner of his lips and takes a deep breath, sinking back into his dreams. "Jungkook, why are you here?"

With a great effort, he finally pries his eyes open, wanting to understand what persistent companion is disturbing his rest, and immediately frowns, trying to discern reality. Sitting next to him is Jimin in an unusually bright yellow t-shirt, and Jungkook lets the vision consume him. He smiles and reaches for his friend.

"Hyung," he mumbles, touching the warm hand and, gripping it, falls contentedly back asleep.

Chapter Text

It’s easier said than done. For the first couple of days, Jimin enjoys being with his parents, his younger brother, and Hoseok, but reality eventually catches up to him. He hopes it will get easier with time. That he won't see Jungkook in every other passerby, but he still ends up in Jeon’s neighborhood. He can't help himself, thinking about how their lives might have been if they'd met at a competition or through mutual friends. He walks the streets, imagining little Jungkook running along them with his parents, and curses the cruel fate for what it did to the innocent guy.

And just like that, he ends up at Jungkook’s favorite cafe. Well, Jimin might as well order some jajangmyeon, mourn his situation, and let go. After all, didn't he decide to get these stupid thoughts out of his head? He just can't return to Seoul without fulfilling his plan.

The grandma at "At Grandma's" truly is welcoming and sweet. Her thin, wrinkled hands remind Jimin of his father's mother, and her smile instantly puts him at ease. Park orders food and settles at a low table in the center. The cafe is almost empty: too early for lunch and a bit late for breakfast. The only other customer is a guy sleeping by the window, and Jimin's heart skips a beat the moment he sees him. No way… Has he really gone so mad that he's seeing Jungkook everywhere? Jeon can't be here… But Jimin’s heart beats faster, his palms sweat, and his eyes can't look away from the hair falling over the forehead, the soft nose, and the slightly parted lips.

Jungkook…

It really is Jeon Jungkook. The damned Jeon Jungkook. What the hell is he doing here?!

For a few seconds, Jimin is torn: should he approach or run away, pretending Jungkook was a mirage? After all, only by leaving can he carry out his intended plan. Try to, at least. But his legs are already carrying him forward, and a question suddenly rings in his head like a gong: "What happened?" Why is he here? Surely not because he missed his teacher.

Jimin sinks to the floor and just looks for a few seconds, then pulls himself together, remembering that such actions clearly won't help his plan. He calls out softly, hoping to wake the unexpected guest, but Jungkook stubbornly refuses to wake up. He looks so sleepy that Jimin wonders where he spent the night. When did he arrive? Is he here with his grandfather? Then why is he sleeping in the cafe?

Then Jungkook takes Jimin’s hand and smiles, sending an electric shock through Park’s body. And just like that, he no longer wants to go anywhere. He never wants to go anywhere.

Damn.

Jimin eats his jajangmyeon, admiring the seagulls and Jungkook, then opens a textbook on his phone and starts reading. He's in no hurry: he simply lets Jungkook sleep and allows himself to indulge in fleeting dreams.

A little over an hour passes before Jungkook stretches sleepily and finally opens his eyes. First, he looks out the window at the clear blue sky, then thoughtfully turns, and his gaze lands on Jimin. He hesitates for a few seconds, probably recalling recent events and reconciling them with this new reality, then a smile slowly lights up his face.

"Teacher!" Jungkook exclaims, and Jimin flinches.

"You'd better call me 'hyung'," — it wouldn't be the first time — "I'm not your teacher here."

At these words, Jungkook's smile widens even more, and Jimin once again curses his willpower.

"Hyung, why are you here?"

"That's my question for you," Jimin chuckles.

"I came to Busan!"

"I can see that," comes the gentle laugh again. Jimin waits for an answer, but Jungkook isn't in a hurry to give one. He just tenses up, confirming Jimin's suspicions. Something happened. "Are you here with your grandfather?"

"No," Jungkook frowns.

"But he knows you're here?"

"Probably." Jungkook looks out the window again.

"Don't tell me you ran away."

"What's it to you, hyung?" the boy defends himself by attacking, and Jimin hurries to change the subject.

"And you came straight here? You're a real jajangmyeon fan!"

"Well, isn't it worth it?" Jungkook smirks playfully.

"It is, definitely. The best jajangmyeon I've had in my life," Jimin smiles widely and rests his head on his elbow. He likes seeing Kook like this: full of spirit, free. It's clear he even feels different here. And it makes him even more attractive.

"I wanted to find you," Jungkook suddenly says, a little pitifully. "I was on your street, but it's so long, and the buildings are apartment blocks. I had no idea where to look."

Jimin desperately tries not to read too much into Jungkook's words. Not to think that the first thing he did was go looking for him, but he can't help it: everything inside him treacherously comes alive, and a tingling sensation fills his body.

"Jungkook…" is all he can muster, trying not to blush.

'Idiot, get a grip, the fall back to Earth will hurt,' the thoughts hammer in his head, but Jimin just follows his student as he heads outside and towards the sea.

"It's so strange to see you without a tie," Jungkook says, walking backwards along the water's edge. They walk along the rocky beach, full of seaweed, admiring the expanse. No one dares to swim in this strange place, creating perfect seclusion.

"You think I sleep in it?" Jimin laughs.

"No, of course not. But it suits you. You're completely different like this."

"Yellow is my favorite color," Park says for some reason, and Jungkook nods contentedly.

They talk for a long time about all sorts of things. They talk about Busan, compare it to Seoul, and reclaim their abandoned accents. They wander along a small stretch of beach, looking at their feet and at each other, and Jimin wants to stay here forever. Just to admire the sea with Jungkook, far from all worries and sorrows.

"So why did you run away?" Jimin asks when they are sitting silently on small boulders. He doesn't press, but understands now is the most suitable moment to discuss this. He can't just leave it.

Jungkook sighs and stands up. He takes a couple of steps forward, peering at the horizon, then turns to face Jimin.

"Because I don't feel like I belong there. I don't feel like I'm living my own life. Without asking, grandfather just shoved me into this mold… And I'm suffocating. I'm constantly angry. I'm so angry all the time, hyung!" Jungkook exclaims desperately, and Jimin's heart clenches at the pain he sees in his eyes. He desperately wants to go over and hug Jungkook, but he holds back, biting his lip and lowering his gaze. His fingers dig into the sand. "Why did this happen to me? To them?.."

Jungkook's voice breaks, and Jimin jumps to his feet. There's no more point in holding back. He can't just sit and watch. He can't bear to see his pain. Smiling sadly, Jimin walks over to Jungkook, looks him in the eyes, and pulls him close.

At first, Jeon freezes, but Jimin isn't ready to let go: he just wants to comfort, support, and say he's here. After a few seconds, Jungkook closes his arms around his friend's back. He hugs with a surprising thirst, as if starved for simple human warmth, and Jimin finds it harder and harder to control his emotions. He wants to destroy everyone and everything that hurt Jungkook. He wants to shield him from any hardship. But for now, he just gently strokes his head and whispers, almost inaudibly, "It will pass."

Chapter Text

"So this is our famous hotshot," Hoseok smirks, leaning back in his chair and giving Jungkook a once-over. Jimin immediately kicks him under the table. They are sitting in a small street cafe, enjoying the summer warmth. It's already dark, and people around them are relaxing after a day's work. Pleasant music drifts from somewhere nearby, and the air is filled with the smell of food, creating a cozy, conversational atmosphere. "You really gave my friend quite a headache."

Jungkook hunches his shoulders guiltily and looks timidly at Jimin.

"Sorry," he addresses the teacher, then shifts his gaze to Hoseok. "But he already gave me an earful. I realized I was acting like a complete asshole."

"Let's not talk about it, it's all in the past," Jimin says, leaning over the table as if building a barrier between Hoseok and Jungkook.

"As you wish," Hoseok raises his hands mockingly. "So, where are you going to stay, traveler? It's getting late."

"I know," Jungkook nods, frowning. "I don't know…"

"Real forward-thinking," Hoseok laughs again, and Jimin kicks him once more.

Sitting here with his friends, Park Jimin doesn't want to think about any problems, but unfortunately, he can't stay in this dreamy state for long.

"He'll stay with me," Jimin interjects, and Jungkook perks up.

"Won't I be a nuisance?"

"Of course not. Maybe your presence will even knock some sense into my stubborn brother. You're the same age, by the way."

"You two could become best friends," Hoseok bursts out laughing, but neither Jungkook nor Jimin gets the joke. "Jimin says you're an excellent dancer."

"Not at all," Jungkook shakes his head. "I'm nowhere near his level."

"What are you talking about?" Jimin wonders, moving even closer. As pleasant as the compliment is, he tries not to dwell on it. After all, Jungkook can't possibly not know how good he is. "You're an amazing dancer. You dance with such passion, it's captivating…"

"Just look at you two, showering each other with compliments." Resting his chin on his hand, Hoseok grins and looks at the guys in turn. "In that case, I simply have to see it for myself."

"Are we supposed to put on a show for you?" Jimin narrows his eyes, and his friend shrugs, putting on the most exaggeratedly innocent face he can muster.

"Why not?"

"Do you think Jungkook came here to entertain you?"

"I don't mind," Jungkook chimes in, looking at Jimin with an almost pleading gaze, leaving him no choice but to agree.

When Jungkook goes to the restroom and the two best friends are left alone for a moment, Hoseok watches him leave and starts laughing.

"I hope you'll invite me to the wedding," he jokes, while watching Jimin intently. Jimin frowns and swallows, surprising Hoseok with his unexpected reaction.

"Your jokes are particularly nice today," Jimin remarks sarcastically.

"They always are. But they've never provoked a reaction like this," Hoseok drawls, as understanding dawns slowly on him. He leans closer to Jimin and continues in a whisper. "What's going on? Do you have a crush on your student?"

"Stop it!" Jimin hisses, throwing a glance in the direction Jungkook went. "This is neither the time nor the place for jokes like that."

But Hoseok isn't joking anymore. He looks at his friend completely seriously, trying to grasp the depth of the hole he's dug for himself, and when Jungkook returns, he just gives an awkward smile. For the rest of the evening, he doesn't make a single mocking remark.

***

As soon as the guys approach the door, they can hear Jimin's parents laughing. Jungkook shifts his weight awkwardly from foot to foot and throws a worried look at his friend.

"Are you sure it's okay?" he asks.

"Of course, they're expecting us."

Jimin had called his family during the day, and they happily agreed to host a guy from their hometown. Remembering Jimin's stories about the student who had lost his parents, they welcome him as if they've known him for years. In the first few days, Park Jimin wouldn't stop talking about the sweet and talented Jungkook, who just lacked a bit of motivation to achieve success, and the whole family quickly grew fond of him.

"I've been to your cafe," Jungkook says, devouring his rice with vegetables as everyone except Jimin eats dinner at the large table in the living room. Jimin, who ate his fill at the cafe, can't even look at food, but Jungkook's refusal wasn't accepted by Jimin's mom, and he, it seems, is glad about it. "It was a long time ago, but I remember liking it. I'm really sorry things turned out that way."

"Thank you," Jimin's father smiles sadly. "We haven't given up on the idea; we're planning to reopen the place."

"I hope it works out for you."

"So, what do you plan to do? Jimin says your grandfather has a large company?" his mom asks.

"Yes," the guest frowns immediately, and his spoon with rice freezes mid-air. "It produces cosmetics, mostly for export, and works a lot with foreign companies."

"Then you'll definitely need a good command of English," Jimin's mom smiles. "Have you called your grandfather yet?"

"Not yet," Jungkook lowers his gaze. He knows he should, but he also knows that as soon as he does, he'll have to go back.

"You should be kinder to him; he must be worried," Mr. Park says seriously, and Jimin tenses up. He notices his friend's state and fights the urge to ask his father to stop. "Whatever disagreement you had, he has a right to know where you are."

Jungkook doesn't answer. He listens, agrees, but Jimin has already figured out that Jungkook isn't the type to do everything he's told. He's stubborn, and if he's made a decision, he'll stick to it. Whether it's right or wrong, this trait earns Jimin's respect.

"Did your grandfather visit Busan often?" his mom asks, changing the subject, apparently also noticing the thickening atmosphere.

"Never," the guest replies simply, astonishing everyone present. Jimin also listens intently, hoping Jungkook will explain. "My mom and dad got married against my grandfather's will. He never accepted her," Jungkook smiles. "So they ran away. Grandfather, of course, knew where they were and called on my father's birthday, but he hadn't even seen me until after they died."

Everyone at the table freezes. No one expected such a story, and now they don't know how to react. Jimin couldn't have imagined that the family relations were so strained, even though he could sense it. He can't even begin to guess what it's like – to lose everything in one day and move in with a complete stranger who decided to reshape your life.

"It must have been very difficult for you." Jimin's mom also realizes the severity of the situation and covers Jungkook's hand with her own. "But I have no doubt you can find your own path. Judging by Jimin's stories, you are a very talented young man."

Jungkook throws a surprised look at the teacher, but Jimin avoids it.

"I'm not sure that's true, but I'd like to believe it."

"You'll find your footing," Jimin’s father assures. "And I hope my son will help you with that."

"Now, off to bed, I can see you can barely keep your eyes open," Mrs. Park says with a gentle smile.

They see Jungkook off to Jimin's room and prepare a bed on the floor. Jimin himself sleeps on a floor mattress, as there's no bed in his room, so they clear out more space for the guest and lay out a second sleeping set, which Jungkook collapses onto as soon as he comes out of the bathroom.

Jimin comes in a couple of hours later. He turns on the desk lamp and, trying to be quiet, settles onto his own mattress, but Jungkook turns over and opens his eyes anyway.

"Did I wake you?" Jimin whispers. "Sorry."

"No, I wasn't asleep."

"Is it uncomfortable?" Jungkook isn't used to sleeping on the floor, and there's no air conditioner in the room…

"It's fine," the guest quickly assures him, slipping his hands under the pillow. "You have a wonderful family, hyung. Even your weird brother, who was staring at me all evening like I was some exotic animal."

"He can do that," Jimin laughs and turns off the light.

They are plunged into darkness, the only light coming from a street lamp outside, allowing them to see the outlines of objects. A breeze slips through the open window, bringing with it the coolness and sounds of the night city, so Jimin lies there for a long time, just listening to the sound of distant cars and admiring the peacefully snoring Jungkook beside him.

Chapter Text

"Don't even hope I'll go easy on you with my judging," Hoseok says, sitting down on a bench near the cliff edge. A magnificent view of the sea opens up from the high rock, and now it's about to get even more interesting thanks to the performance they're going to put on for him.

"Was I your friend for eight years for nothing?" Jimin pouts.

"All the more reason. You have to be worthy of such an honorable title," Hoseok laughs. "Who's first?"

"Me!" Jungkook volunteers.

Besides them, there's no one else in this spot, and the closest people are in the cars driving past behind them, so the guys unashamedly turn on music from a phone and start dancing. Jungkook seems a little nervous, but once he starts, his talent takes over, and the performance completely consumes the performer. Hoseok watches like a strict teacher, noting the slightest flaws, but in the end, he still concludes that Jimin is right: Jungkook is magnificent. He even begins to understand why his friend is so hung up on this guy. Jimin himself, predictably, can't take his eyes off Jungkook and watches with such admiration that Hoseok feels like punching him to bring him back to his senses.

However, when it's Jimin's turn, little changes. Jungkook watches, devouring every movement with his eyes and noticing every breath, so that by the end, Hoseok's attention shifts from his dancing friend to the student. Halfway through the song, Jungkook even takes out his phone and starts recording a video. Interesting…

"You should record a dance together and post it online," Hoseok says when the guys are waiting for his verdict. Jungkook immediately perks up, raising his burning gaze to Jimin. Jimin looks very doubtful, but as soon as Jungkook asks a couple of times, he immediately gives in. "And I'll be the cameraman."

The friends start choosing a song and then practicing. The rehearsal takes a couple of hours, but Jungkook continues to polish the moves even after Hoseok gives the go-ahead to record, so he and Jimin leave him alone.

"He's a perfectionist," Hoseok says as they walk to a small shop nearby.

"Seems you're right. I hadn't noticed that about him before."

"Yeah, it seems you don't notice a lot of things…"

"What do you mean?"

"Are you sure your feelings are unrequited?" Hoseok asks, and Jimin stops dead in his tracks.

"I asked you not to talk about this."

"No, you asked me not to joke about it yesterday when Jungkook was around. He's not around now, so what's the problem? Are you embarrassed? You think I don't know your type? Hoping I didn't notice you drooling over Suho from the senior group?" Hoseok laughs, and Jimin hits his friend on the shoulder.

"I wasn't drooling over him!" he flushes.

"Of course, of course! Well, to be fair, you were also staring at Mina. But who wouldn't stare at her in that outfit?! Jimin, you know you don't have to be shy with me…" Hoseok says seriously, and Park, after thinking in silence for a few seconds, sighs.

"All right, I feel like if I don't tell someone, I'll explode!"

"Honestly, you're not doing a great job of hiding your secret," Hoseok whispers, leaning close to his friend's ear.

"Is it that obvious? Do you think Jungkook noticed?"

"I doubt it. You seem to have mutual blindness: too busy adoring each other."

"Don't make things up," Jimin begins, and Hoseok puts his hands up as if to say, 'Who said I'm making things up?' "Don't give me hope. You know how much it will hurt when I lose it later."

Jimin groans and sinks onto the grass. He grabs his head, digs his fingers into his hair, and throws a pitiful look at his friend.

"It's getting harder and harder to control myself…"

"Maybe he wouldn't mind," Hoseok says, sitting down next to him.

"He's not even of age yet. You want to put me in jail?" Jimin smiles bitterly.

"It's only six months! And legally, you're in the clear even now. Unless you were planning to assault him, of course."

"Hyung, let's stop this talk. His grandfather wouldn't let me within a mile of him if he suspected anything."

"You said yourself he's only home at night. What's with the excuses, Jimin? You didn't act like this before," Hoseok frowns, remembering how skillfully his friend used to flirt with everyone.

"And you remember how it ended. I won't survive another look full of disgust. Not from him."

Yeah, that was unpleasant. Hoseok had to get Jimin drunk to the point of semi-consciousness back then, but Park still ended up dropping out of dance classes, citing the need to choose a more profitable profession. How much of that was the main reason, Hoseok doesn't know, but he certainly doesn't want to see his friend in that state again. Jimin can't be called the most self-confident person, but he never hated himself as much as he did that evening. If only Jungkook could return his feelings… It would heal those old wounds.

Returning with food, the guys find Jungkook still practicing. All sweaty and out of breath, he runs up to them and happily pulls kimbap from the bag, and Hoseok has to literally pull back a melting Jimin, who can't take his eyes off Jungkook's neck. Yeah… At this rate, his secret won't stay a secret for long.

After eating, Jimin and Jungkook start dancing. They both know the choreography perfectly, and even though their styles are different, the moves are sharp and blend together beautifully. Hoseok can't help but admire them and smiles constantly while recording the video.

"Got it!" he shouts contentedly when they finally manage to do it perfectly, after which Jungkook literally jumps towards Jimin and hugs him.

"That was awesome, hyung!" he says excitedly, and Jimin awkwardly hugs him back.

The guys spend all their time together: walking around the city, sitting in cafes, meeting Jimin's and Jungkook's old friends. Soon, they even record a new cover, having polished the choreography to perfection beforehand. Their time is full of laughter and smiles.

In the evening, after almost a week in Busan, when everyone has already gone to bed, Jungkook enters the bedroom after a long, cool shower. The heat is receding slowly and very reluctantly, so Jimin is lying on his mattress, catching every gust of wind from the window. Jungkook, however, quickly snatches the phone from his friend's hands and flops onto his own bed.

"I think we did the right thing recording the cover for the new song: it should get a lot of views," he says calmly, as if he hadn't just taken the phone from its rightful owner. Jimin just opens his eyes wide in feigned outrage, pretending to be horrified by such audacity.

"Don't count on much, nobody knows us, and there are only two videos on the channel."

"It's fine, we'll fix that over time," Jungkook says contentedly, rummaging through the phone.

"Why don't you use your own?" Jimin raises an eyebrow.

"Are you that eager to get rid of me? If I turn on my phone, my grandfather can find me, you know."

"I know, Jungkook, but you're not planning to be here forever," Jimin sighs understandingly. Honestly, he isn't sure what he'd prefer: to have Jungkook stay here forever or to send him away quickly, saving himself the torment. The last few days have been a kind of sweet torture, and Park has no idea what to do with his feelings. He is losing it.

"Wouldn't be so bad," Jungkook smirks. "We have a hundred thousand views!"

"No way," Jimin squints. "You think I'll believe that? And anyway, give me back my phone!"

Park gets up from his mattress and crawls over to Jungkook, who, however, isn't ready to part with the valuable item at all: he turns away and tucks the phone under his side. Jimin tries to get it, but overpowering Jungkook when he's not willing to give up is practically impossible. Jungkook stubbornly holds onto the item, and Jimin can't do anything about it. But there's one option left: a method that disarms anyone. Deciding that Jungkook has left him no choice, Jimin starts tickling him.

"Give it!"

"No! Won't give it!" Jungkook says, laughing and kicking. He turns onto his stomach, trying to avoid Jimin's hands, and then onto his back, shoving with his feet. He's not used to losing, so Jungkook, without thinking twice, switches to the attacker's role. Pushing Jimin away for just a second, he uses the breather to get up and starts tickling him himself. Jimin falls back onto the mattress with a roar of laughter. He twists and squirms but can't get rid of Jungkook, who is getting closer and closer. Who is breathing right into his neck, washing over him with a heat that pierces to the bone.

Finally, Jimin catches Jungkook's hands and, panting, looks into his eyes. They are both beaming, trying to catch their breath, and the heat inside concentrates in Jimin’s stomach. Suddenly, he becomes acutely aware of how close they are. Jungkook's strong, warm hands are gripping his palms and causing an insane desire to get even closer. Jimin's gaze falls on Jungkook's lips, his heart races, and Park freezes. It seems he's about to ruin everything. It seems his willpower is about to fail, and for just a second, he'll get what he's been dreaming of for so long. It's like selling your soul to the devil: quickly enjoying the desired thing and suffering for the rest of eternity.

When Jimin pulls his hands out of Jungkook's grip, it's almost physically painful. Disappointment hits mercilessly, and his heartbeat echoes in his ears.

"Give me back my phone and go to sleep," Park says in an icy tone, turning towards the wall and covering himself with a thin blanket to hide his very noticeable arousal. Shame washes over his body in a hot wave, and Jimin prays to all the gods that Jungkook didn't notice his reaction. He feels he's blushed but hopes it can be blamed on their little game.

These actions catch Jungkook off guard. He moves back, chastened, and looks at Jimin in confusion.

"Yeah… I probably should have asked your permission…" he mumbles, and Jimin squeezes his eyes shut. He can't stand hearing that voice: guilt and the desire to comfort him squeeze his heart. "Sorry. I just wanted to check the view count."

Jimin hears Jungkook return the phone to the bedside table and obediently lie down in his place.

"Hyung, are you mad?" Jungkook asks. "I'm really sorry. I didn't think you'd react like that. Hyung?"

Jimin stays silent. He feels that if he says anything, either his voice will break or he will. It's getting harder to control himself. He wants to run away, escape, but he can't even get up, afraid Jungkook will notice the real reason for his coldness.

Why is he like this? Why such a loser who keeps falling for people he shouldn't?

Jimin turns off the light and desperately tries to fall asleep. He hears Jungkook moving but ignores it.

"Hyung?"

"It's fine, just sleep," Park finally manages to say.

"Hyung, you'll forgive me, right?" Jungkook is suddenly very close, and Jimin feels his hands on his waist. Did he move closer to him and hug him? His breath hitches, and Jimin is torn between the desire to push the hand away and pull Jungkook even closer. Neither would be an adequate response. Neither.

And he's persistent… Pestering with affection? So this is how he makes up? Whatever he's feeling, Jimin can't help but melt and realize only one thing at that moment: this kind of behavior makes him fall even deeper in love.

***

He's awakened by the persistent buzzing of his phone. Jimin struggles to open his eyes and glances at the clock: ten in the morning. The sun is flooding the room, letting in the summer heat, but Jungkook is still sleeping incredibly close, his arm thrown over Jimin possessively.

Damn you, Jeon Jungkook… You have no idea what you're doing!

Jimin finally focuses on the screen, and the name there instantly wakes him up fully: Jungkook's grandfather is calling.

Chapter Text

His first instinct is to decline the call. To not let the real world invade their little deserted island. But the more sleep recedes, the clearer Jimin understands: he can't ignore reality. Besides, isn't this what he needs? Jungkook will leave, and he can finally start to get a grip. Or at least try.

Slipping out from under Jungkook's arm, Jimin leaves the room and answers the call. No one is home: his parents are at work, his brother is who-knows-where.

"Mr. Jeon?" he greets, feeling his heart rate accelerate.

"Teacher Park, hello! I didn't want to bother you with this, but Jungkook went to a friend's yesterday and didn't take his phone; we can't reach him. You wouldn't happen to know how I can find this friend of his? Maybe Jungkook mentioned a name? Honestly, I've been so busy I completely forgot."

Jimin listens carefully to this beautiful lie, then, after a pause, replies:

"Jungkook is here, Mr. Jeon."

Silence hangs on the other end. Grandfather Jeon clearly didn't expect this.

"He missed his hometown and is staying with my family; it just so happens we're from the same city. We're in Busan right now."

"Jungkook is in Busan?" Mr. Jeon raises his voice, and Jimin winces. For just a shadow, a fraction of a second, he sees how the grandfather treats Jungkook, and even this small outburst doesn't sit well with him.

"If I may," Jimin tries to start politely. "He's having a hard time adapting. I think it would be easier for Jungkook to adjust if he had something left from his old life. If you didn't treat everything he holds dear with disgust."

"I don't know what Jungkook has told you, Teacher Park, but I don't think you know the situation well," Mr. Jeon says calmly, and Jimin understands he will do everything to save face. So Park simply cuts off any possibility of twisting what's happening.

"I know he doesn't want to come back," Jimin replies. "I know he currently has zero motivation to study and become the heir you're hoping for."

"Are you saying your lessons aren't producing results?" Jeon continues, unshaken.

"No. I'm saying that if you want him back, you'd better come to terms with the fact that everything Jungkook loves is here. Meet your grandson halfway, and he will meet you halfway. Don't take away what's dear to him. And forgive me for such impertinence."

"Thank you for the advice, Teacher Park," Mr. Jeon replies coldly after a few seconds of silence. "Please send me your address."

Jimin hesitates for a long time after the call ends. His finger hovers over the "send" button, and his eyes keep glancing at the door behind which Jungkook is sleeping. He'll be angry. He might see it as a betrayal. But is there any other way? Jungkook can't stay here. He has to return home—to his only relative—and it's better if he does so after his grandfather's request.

All morning, Jimin can't calm his agitation. He runs through different scenarios in his head, blames himself, convinces himself he's right…

"Are you still mad?" Jungkook says, sliding a banana towards him with a timid smile, but Jimin only shakes his head absently. Did he do the right thing? Will Mr. Jeon come? What will their meeting be like? Right now, Jungkook is trying to make up, but will Jimin soon be the one begging for forgiveness? The thought of Jungkook being angry with him makes Jimin's heart clench unpleasantly, and his hands turn cold. He doesn't want to eat—what does he need a banana for?!

"Hyung?"

"Jungkook, I did something," Jimin says, standing up from the kitchen counter where they're having breakfast. "Just try to understand, okay?"

"What is it, hyung?" Jungkook asks, worried.

"Your grandfather called," Park replies, and in that instant, he sees his friend's gaze dim. As if he's been condemned to something utterly joyless.

"You told him where I am?" Jungkook clarifies seriously, as if he already knows the answer.

"Yes."

"I see. So he'll be here soon."

Jungkook gets up from the counter and goes to the room, and Jimin just covers his mouth with his hand and looks at the now-closed door. It takes him a couple of minutes to gather his courage before he enters the bedroom, where Jungkook is packing his things into his backpack.

"I'm sorry that I…" Jimin says. "I thought it was better not to let the situation drag on. Better to resolve everything now, while you can still make peace calmly."

"I understand," Jungkook says, his tone icy. "I couldn't live off your family forever. Of course, you did the right thing."

He even gives a slight smile, but Jimin sees how much his friend's mood has changed, and he wants to kick himself. He personally wiped the smile off Jungkook's face.

'I'm sorry, let's run away,' he wants to say, but Park just watches, biting his lip, and stays silent.

Grandfather arrives in the afternoon, when Jimin's mom has already returned from work. Mr. Jeon thanks her for taking care of his grandson and tells Jungkook to get in the car. Jungkook bows gratefully to Jimin's mom, waves to his brother, and heads towards the car.

"Jungkook…" Jimin calls, taking a step forward, and Jeon stops. What to say? 'I'm sorry'? He's already said all there is to say, but none of it was enough. None of it was what he truly wanted to say.

Jungkook doesn't move for a few seconds, waiting for Jimin's words, but then realizes they aren't coming.

"We'll continue the lessons, right?" he suddenly says, with a note of plea in his voice, turning sharply to face his teacher.

"Of course," Jimin can't contain his emotion. "Of course, Kookie, as soon as I get back."

Jungkook smiles with the corner of his lips and walks to the car.

***

Surprisingly, they don't drive straight to Seoul. Instead, the grandfather asks Jungkook to show him his favorite places. He says he wants to see the house where his son lived, the streets his grandson ran to school on, and the park where the family was happy.

Hesitantly, Jungkook fulfills his relative's request and takes them to "At Grandma's." He introduces the grandfather to the owner, observes how gallant he can be, and then explains why he came here so often. Grandfather listens attentively: he nods and sometimes even smiles, but Jungkook sees it's not easy for him. But it's helpful. Jungkook sincerely believes that such stories will help them grow closer, and help his grandfather feel closer to the son he hadn't seen for almost twenty years.

"You're right, Jungkook. And your teacher is right. I shouldn't have ripped you so abruptly from your old world. I'm glad I could see where you lived and what you were interested in," Grandfather says when they return to the car. "But you must understand: I want what's best for you. But you have to put in the effort for that future. Please, try for me. Try to become a worthy man, someone your father would be proud of, and someone I will be proud of. After all, you're all I have left. And you look so much like your father…"

"Really?" Jungkook searches his grandfather's eyes, hoping for confirmation and simultaneously looking for traces of his dad in the relative's face. He knows he resembles his father, but he can't hold back tears upon hearing these words. Grandfather gently strokes his grandson's cheek and pulls him close. His embrace is reserved, but perhaps it's the only kind he's capable of. Jungkook is happy even with that.

They return home in the early morning and decide to spend the next day together. Now it's the grandfather's turn to show his interests and the perks of his life. They sleep in until noon, then go to the tailor—the one who has been making the best suits for Grandfather for forty years.

"What a handsome grandson you have, Chairman Jeon," the frail old man says, picking up a measuring tape. "Dressing someone like him won't be difficult. Everything looks good on beautiful people. And beautiful clothes make them simply irresistible."

Jungkook stands in front of the mirror in the atelier, obediently doing everything his grandfather tells him, but he still occasionally glances at the TV, where even the most boring news seems interesting at this moment. He has already tried on several ready-made suits, and, admittedly, they all suited him quite well, but in none of them did Jungkook feel like himself.

"Bet you already have a girlfriend, eh? A heartbreaker?" the tailor smirks, but Jungkook just brushes it off.

"What's the rush with girls? He needs to get his life in order first, then he'll find a worthy wife," Mr. Jeon interjects, and Jungkook is glad that at least there won't be an arranged marriage soon. "Once he builds a career, he can choose anyone."

"That's true, Chairman," the tailor agrees. "But it's boring without love."

"We've already been through that 'fun' with his father, Mr. Kim, so we'll wait on that for now," Grandfather states seriously, shifting his gaze to the TV and closing the topic. Jungkook exhales. "What a disgrace! Why would they talk about such things on the news?" Jeon exclaims suddenly, jolting his grandson from the drowsiness he was slowly sinking into.

Jungkook looks at the screen and sees the headline: "Famous idol admits to not being straight." Something inside Jungkook gives a painful twitch, and all his attention shifts to the previously boring news. They're showing some blond guy. In a few clips, he's dancing, then his ecstatic female fans appear, and then it cuts to a serious anchorwoman talking about his confession as if it's a downfall.

"His poor family!" Grandfather laments irritably. "He’s just shamed them in front of the whole country! And he's shaming the country too. Ugh! So many of these Western perversions have crept in!"

"Ah, you're so right," the tailor sighs, changing the channel. "In our day, such things didn't exist… At least there aren't many of those freaks."

Jungkook realizes he's stopped breathing. His pulse hammers in his temples, and heat washes over his entire body. How can they say that? He's genuinely astonished. How can you curse a person just for who they love? How is that possible?.. He doesn't understand.

Chapter Text

"So, how are your attempts at shaking off love going?" Hoseok mocks when he and Jimin find themselves back on the cliff where they recorded the cover. "Have you bought the train ticket yet?"

"One more week," Park replies sullenly, clearly not appreciating his friend's joke.

"Yeah, I bet you're counting the hours. How many are left?" Jung prods, and Jimin shoves him in the shoulder so hard he almost topples over onto the grass they're sitting on.

"Do you enjoy making fun of me?" Jimin raises his voice, and Hoseok wipes the smug grin off his face.

"What are we supposed to do, cry?" he says confidently. "What's the point of the drama? Nobody died, Jimin. You just fell in love. With a wonderful guy who's worth it."

"I know he's worth it," his friend says wearily.

"Well, then, enjoy it. Do you know how rare that is? I wish I could fall in love, but no, all the fun is reserved for you." Hoseok smiles again, and Jimin shoves him once more, this time quite gently.

If only he could enjoy it... During these past few days without Jungkook, Jimin has felt like he's about to climb the walls. What will happen when he sees him? It probably won't get any easier. But Park buys the train ticket anyway. Three days earlier than planned. Well, at least he lasted a whole week without Jungkook.

Seoul greets him with the same heat and unbearable stuffiness. The moment he enters the station, Jimin immediately reaches for his phone and opens the messages. "When are you coming back?" reads the last unanswered message from Jungkook, and now Park can calmly write, "I've arrived."

"Great, when do we start lessons?" comes the reply half a minute later, but Jimin still has enough time to feel anxious.

"Tomorrow morning is fine."

"I'll be waiting at eleven."

Noticing how widely he's smiling, Jimin sits down on his suitcase and looks around, lost. People rush past him on their own business, while he feels like he's gone insane: floating somewhere in a world full of thoughts about Jungkook, unable to break back into reality.

Well, he's in deep now.

The next day, which didn't come soon enough, Jimin enters Jungkook's room and finds him in front of the mirror. His friend's eyes already shine with their usual joy, and his lips stretch into a radiant smile.

"Hyung!" Jungkook exclaims, then seems slightly embarrassed and greets him modestly. "I mean, Teacher Park. It's good to see you again."

Jimin laughs and takes his rightful place. The moment he sees his student, Park immediately feels at home. He feels warm and comfortable even in this unwelcoming place.

"How was the rest of your vacation?" Jungkook asks. "You didn't record any dances without me, did you? What cover do you think we should do next?"

"I don't know, but I came here to study English," Park reminds both himself and his student. It would be better for everyone if they returned to a more businesslike interaction.

"We have time. Do you have any other lessons today?" Jungkook asks, and Jimin shakes his head. "Neither do I. We have the whole day ahead of us. We can't let our viewers down."

"Viewers, Jungkook?" Jimin smirks. "We have two videos on the channel."

"But people like them," Jungkook insists. "That means we have to continue. And we have a lot of views."

About twenty of those are Jimin's. Yeah, he has to admit it: his plan to eject Jungkook from his head and heart has failed spectacularly. Every day after Jungkook left Busan, Jimin missed him so much that he started watching their covers and, frankly, he understands perfectly well why they're quite popular. He himself couldn't take his eyes off the muscular dancer.

"Actually, we only have time until five. I have a date," Jimin hears and suddenly feels as if he's been punched in the gut. "You'll help me pick out an outfit, right?"

"A date?" Jimin asked, trying not to reveal how much this unsettled him. "When did you manage that?"

"I figured since I have time before classes start, I should use it," Jungkook shrugs, and Jimin suddenly feels like a complete idiot.

Why? It isn't like he has a confession of love written on his forehead. He came here for work; they are friends after all, he has every right to be here. Yet Jimin feels as if he's been hoping for something. And now that hope has been cruelly crushed. Well, serves him right. He knew...

"I noticed Soyeon liked me, so I decided to call her," Jungkook continues serenely.

"And she agreed?" The tone comes out more irritated than surprised, but Jimin is just glad he can form coherent sentences at all. He keeps fluctuating between feeling hot and cold.

"What, do you think I'm ugly?" Jungkook turns from the mirror, where he's been holding up shirt after shirt to himself, and frowns playfully. The question seems rhetorical, but Jungkook waits for an answer anyway. "Why wouldn't she agree?"

"No, of course not," the teacher mutters under his breath, and the student frowns even deeper, studying his friend's face more intently.

"No? Really? Or maybe you find me unpleasant to look at, and that's why you're surprised someone would want to go out with me?"

He's almost laughing, but Jimin isn't in the mood for jokes. In his imagination, he already sees Jungkook with this Soyeon, whoever she is. They're walking down the street, smiling and holding hands. Jungkook leans in to her... and Jimin starts to feel sick.

"Maybe we should actually study English?" the teacher snaps irritably, and all positive emotion vanishes from Jungkook's face. "I really didn't come here to be your wingman."

"So you do think I'm ugly," Jungkook concludes, trying to turn it all into a joke, but Jimin suddenly gets so fed up that he stands up and takes a step toward his friend.

"You know you're very attractive. A gorgeous guy. Any girl would be happy to have you. And now, can we start the lesson?" Jimin's eyes glint with irritation, his brows are furrowed, and there isn't a hint of amusement on his face, which makes Jungkook nod in surprise, toss the shirt onto the bed, and sit down at the table.

The remainder of the hour passes in a purely businesslike atmosphere, and afterwards Jimin goes to the bathroom and, seizing a free moment, goes down to the garden to make a call. Anger is boiling inside him, and Park knows exactly who to direct it at.

"I'm busy right now," comes Hoseok's whisper, but Jimin doesn't care.

"Make time," he replies sharply, and his friend on the other end falls silent. Jimin hears some rustling, and then Hoseok returns to the phone.

"What happened?" his friend asks, now loudly.

"What the hell did you give me that fucking hope for?" Jimin lashes out. "I asked you not to! I told you nothing would come of it, but you thought it was funny. He's going on a date, hyung! And now I have to sit here and help him choose an outfit. And then, apparently, watch the relationship unfold. Listen to stories about his wonderful girlfriend, maybe even see them together because we're friends now! Damn this friendship."

Jimin almost spits, grimacing and gripping the phone tightly. He's sitting on a huge boulder under a cherry tree and looking down at his feet.

"How do I get out of this? Maybe this is for the best. It'll bring me to my senses. Bring me back down to earth. Hit me where it hurts... But how..." Jimin hesitates, unable to get the words out. "I'm not sure I can do it, hyung."

"You're jealous," Hoseok concludes dejectedly.

"If only it were just that. I feel like such a fool..." Jimin squeezes his eyes shut and lowers his head, leaning toward the ground. "I actually believed you... Didn't even notice when I started to believe."

"Sorry," Hoseok says quietly. "What do you expect from me? I'm an idiot. You know me. My own love life is a mess... Since when do you listen to me?"

"What should I do now?" Park asks desperately.

"I don't know. But, Jimin, it doesn't seem like it will just go away on its own. If you have to torture yourself like this every day... Maybe it's not worth the suffering? You won't be able to forget him while you're near him."

Jimin's heart clenches, and fear momentarily takes over his whole body. A slight panic, even. Almost everything in Jimin resists the proposed option, but his mind confirms there is no other way out. It won't just pass. It won't get easier. It will only get worse and worse, and then he'll snap and make Jungkook hate him.

Returning, Jimin finds his student at the door leading to the garden.

"I was just coming to look for you..." he explains, sounding a bit confused, and Park gazes into the enchanting black eyes. His body instinctively leans forward, and his nose breathes in the scent. But Jimin knows he can never get enough of it.

"I got a call..." he mumbles. "I have things to do, I'm afraid I can't stay."

Walking past Jungkook, Park goes upstairs, silently collects his things, and leaves the house with a lingering ache and a heavy heart that, with every fiber of its being, yearns to stay.

That same evening, Jimin calls Jungkook's grandfather and, citing a changed schedule, says the lessons will have to stop. He apologizes but expresses belief that Jungkook will find a more suitable tutor, and wishes his student all the best.

Chapter Text

Classes start in less than a week, and Jimin's mood is still in the gutter. For the past few days, he's been snapping at his roommate, who wasn't particularly friendly or talkative to begin with, and getting irritated over every little thing. And once classes begin, Park feels even more strongly that he's getting no enjoyment out of university life. The lectures exhaust him, and his classmates seem more arrogant and shallow than ever. Everything screams that he's not living the life he dreamed of, and for the first time, the future seems utterly joyless.

Is this really how it's going to continue? Boring classes, exhausting tutoring, no loved ones around? And then he'll start working at some big company where he'll be bossed around as the most junior employee. He'll have to suck up to his boss, striving to climb the ladder and get a position that won't bring him happiness either. Later, he might get married and spend all his energy providing for a family.

Maybe he should just hang himself now and get it over with?

The summer air is dry and hot, and there's almost no one around, despite the clouds slowly gathering in the sky. Jimin stops by the eagle-topped stele and surveys the campus. So many people dream of getting in here… How hard he himself worked for it… And now it disgusts him.

"Jimin-hyung," a painfully familiar voice suddenly calls out, and everything inside him jolts. His heartbeat accelerates sharply, and his breath hitches. Jimin turns around and notices Jungkook slowly approaching him. His friend is in his school uniform, but classes aren't over yet. Did he skip?

"What are you doing here?" the older asks sternly.

"Grandfather said you weren't coming back. You're not answering my calls. You didn't even explain… Hyung, I don't understand… Did something happen?"

Damn that look of his… Why is he looking like that? Why does his voice sound so tender?

"I texted you."

"'I can't tutor you anymore' is not an explanation. You could at least answer your phone. What's going on?"

"My schedule changed," Jimin delivers the prepared line, studying his feet.

"Changed so much that you can't spare even an hour for me? Okay, fine," Jungkook nods and takes a step forward. Jimin retreats. "But can't we still be friends? Can't you at least answer when I call? Text back?"

"I don't have time, Jungkook," Jimin lies firmly, but curses every word as he says it. His body physically resists this excuse, his muscles tensing.

"I don't believe you," Jungkook steps closer again, and this time Jimin just shuffles in place. He wants to run, but for now, he just stares at the stone pavement under his feet. "Did Grandfather do something? Did he send you away? What happened?"

"Why would he do that?" Park asks, surprised, and lifts his gaze. Jungkook immediately catches it.

"Then what? Everything was fine… What about our dancing?"

"Jungkook, I can't…" Jimin almost groans, and Jung finally notices how hard his friend is trying to push him away. He frowns, straightens up, and says with a sort of acceptance:

"Give me the reason."

"I already di—"

"The real reason," Jungkook interrupts sternly. He's never used this tone with Jimin before. Never. And this new facet of him involuntarily captures Jimin's attention. It turns out Jungkook possesses a surprising firmness. A strength that commands obedience.

"If I tell you, you'll be the one who refuses to meet," Jimin says. "But that's what I'm aiming for, right?" he suddenly realizes. "Well, I guess it's time to rip off the band-aid."

Jungkook stops breathing altogether. He leans forward, catching every slight movement Jimin makes. But Jimin isn't rushing to explain. His heart is suddenly beating so fast it feels like it might jump out of his chest. His palms are sweating, and his ears feel blocked. He's not going to faint now, is he? That would be utterly shameful.

"I like you," Jimin whispers, barely audible, and clenches his fists.

"I like you too," Jungkook says, not understanding.

"No. I really like you. The way guys usually like girls," Park clarifies and doesn't dare to look at Jungkook. Jeon swallows and takes a step back. Something inside Jimin collapses, and he closes his eyes. This is the end. He's gone and destroyed everything again.

He can barely even breathe.

Jimin stands like that for a few seconds, expecting either a blow, an insult, or for Jungkook to just walk away. But when he lifts his head again, Jungkook is still there: confused, breathing heavily, staring right through him.

The moment Jimin looks at him, Jungkook's eyes start darting from side to side, as if searching for support.

"I'm not… interested in men," Jeon says in a hollow voice, and Jimin gives a bitter smile.

"I know."

"How?" He seems genuinely surprised.

"You went on a date with a girl. Besides, I couldn't possibly be lucky enough for my feelings to be reciprocated this time," Jimin smiles sadly, examining Jungkook's sneakers.

"This time?" Jeon asks quietly, but Jimin just shakes his head. It's not the time for pitiful stories. "So… we won't see each other again?"

It sounds terrifying. But in reality, it probably isn't that bad. People break up after years of marriage, and they weren't even dating. He doesn't even know what his lips taste like. He'll simply have to forget him.

"It's for the best."

Jungkook just nods, and then, still looking at the ground, he starts to back away. He only catches Jimin's gaze when he's about five meters away, and something in his expression pierces Park right through the heart. Then Jungkook turns around and leaves. Jimin's legs give way, and he sinks to the ground.

Chapter Text

A week and a half passes. A long, nasty, cursed week and a half. Jimin even takes on a new student: a hardworking girl who hangs on his every word, not because she's attracted to him, but because she's attracted to his knowledge. She seems to want to absorb everything he gives her. The perfect student. Nothing like him.

And there's been no word from him. Just as Jimin wanted, they've cut all ties and don't even message each other anymore.

So now Jungkook comes to him in his dreams.

This happened before too, but back then, Park never remembered those dreams; he'd just wake up with his name on his lips and the clear awareness of who he'd just seen. Now, they are vivid, intense, leaving Jimin returning to reality with a rapidly beating heart and often quite tangible arousal.

His body is just mocking him. But maybe it's for the best; perhaps tearing Jungkook out of himself will be easier this way. Gradually, it will all fade away. Both the dreams and the desires.

His roommate jumps down from the ladder leading to the loft and heads to the coffee maker. He's wearing his headphones again, and Jimin wonders if he sleeps in them. No matter when he sees Min Yoongi, the man is always immersed in music. The most expensive thing this person owns is his laptop—the only thing in the apartment he talks to. But Jimin is perfectly fine with that. The last thing he needs is another friend forcing advice on him. After making coffee, his roommate heads back upstairs, and Jimin tiredly gets out of bed. The day has just begun, and he already dislikes it. After university, he has only three students, which means too much time for thinking. Should he take up sports? If he comes home half-dead, maybe certain fantasies will stop haunting him?

Jimin considers this for a second. He freezes, mug in hand, examining the option from different angles, but then lets out an irritated sigh. Who is he trying to fool?! These dreams are the only place where he's happy. "Lately, you've become even gloomier than me. I'm not sure I like this dynamic," his roommate muttered once, and Jimin realized he wasn't handling the separation well. Well, that was expected. The only one who can snap him out of this mood is Hoseok, annoying him with his excessive cheerfulness until the problem starts to seem laughable.

"Hey, Jimin, go eat something," Hyung says when Park finally calls his friend and puts him on speakerphone while making scrambled eggs.

"Working on it."

"If you need someone to love you so badly, get a cat," Hoseok laughs.

"I have a roommate, he's pretty much the same: independent, arrogant, and spends all his time upstairs. Why would I need a cat?" Jimin smirks, leaning towards the microphone.

"Then get yourself a boyfriend!"

"Yes, please!" Yoongi suddenly yells from upstairs, and Jimin flinches. "He's become gloomier than me, and that says a lot. It scares me."

"Oh, really?!" Hoseok replies. "This wise man must be Min Yoongi?"

"Should I leave you two alone?" Jimin's eyes widen. "Are you seriously discussing me, shouting over speakerphone? Hoseok-hyung, if you're so interested, this wise man just said more words to you than he has to me in the past week."

"It's a talent of mine. What can I say, people just warm up to me easily?!" his friend remarks smugly, and Jimin rolls his eyes before simply hanging up.

`If you want to chat, here's Min Yoongi's number,` Jimin sends the message and gets back to his coffee.

The day drags on with familiar slowness. After university, Jimin trudges to one student, then another, then the third, finishing after dark. When he returns, a dim orange streetlamp lazily lights the street, and Jimin shivers from a strange feeling of being watched. No one's around: just fences and houses, and even the nearest convenience store is just around the corner. Jimin doesn't think anyone would attack him—he doesn't even have anything worth stealing besides his cheap phone—but he quickens his pace anyway. Something is bothering him, and he can't shake the feeling.

Then he clearly hears footsteps behind him and freezes. After all, he knows Taekwondo; he won't let himself be bullied. Finally gathering the courage to confront his delusion (Who would actually be following him? He's really losing his mind!), Jimin turns around and is stunned to see Jungkook. He's standing by a wall a few meters away, looking as if he's been caught doing something shameful.

"Are you following me?" is the only thing Jimin can think to ask, and Jungkook timidly approaches.

Park still can't believe it. Is he hallucinating? Has he gone insane? Is Jungkook really standing in front of him? In this light, he looks even more attractive...

"Dammit, Jungkook, why are you here?" Jimin exclaims, realizing he'll have to start the detox all over again, yet desperately devouring Jungkook with his eyes.

"I just..." Jeon hesitates, looking at his feet.

"Were you really following me?" Jimin is genuinely surprised.

"I didn't want to bother you... I just..."

"What?" Park presses, but he can see something is eating at Jungkook. "Did something happen? What happened?"

Worry creeps into his soul, and Jimin takes a few steps forward. He approaches his friend and looks into his face, trying to find answers.

"What could have happened, Hyung?" Jungkook says bitterly. "After you left, nothing happens anymore."

"Is that why you're here? Because you missed me?" Just the thought of it makes all of Jimin's willpower evaporate, and he moves closer to Jungkook. He desperately wants to hug this sincere guy who's blushing so adorably. Just hug him and do everything to make sure he's never sad again.

"Hyung, you're the only good thing in my life," Jeon says, tears in his eyes, and Jimin recoils.

"You can't say things like that to me," he replies, almost pleading. "You know how I feel about you. You know..."

"But it's the truth."

"The truth?" Jimin raises his voice. "You know what else is true? That I can't get you out of my head! That I dream about you day and night. That even now I'm thinking about how much I want to kiss you. You have no idea what I want to do to you..."

Jimin takes a step forward, lowering his voice to a whisper, and desire shoots straight to his lower abdomen when Jungkook looks up at him.

"I look at you, and all I want is to touch your skin, bury my face in your neck, breathe in your scent. I want to kiss every part of your body, I want to be with you, make you mine..." Jimin gets lost in his own desires and can no longer fight the attraction. He moves closer to Jungkook, and his hand rests on the boy's cheek. "I missed you so much... Does this scare you?"

It does. He knows it scares the hell out of him. He sees Jungkook is literally shaking. He's blushing, turning pale, and breathing as if he's run for miles. Jimin smiles, gently strokes his cheek, and decides not to embarrass him further.

"Just go home, Jungkook," he says and turns to leave.

He's spun around sharply, unexpectedly, and greedily, and then lips crash into his. For a second, everything inside screams with joy, but then an icy wave of realization crashes over him, and Jimin pushes Jungkook away.

"What are you doing?!" he almost shouts. "Don't do that! My god, don't do that, Jungkook! Why..?"

Jimin grabs his head and paces between the two stone fences on the narrow street. Shame, guilt, and disgust wash over him all at once, and he wipes the taste of the kiss from his lips. Jungkook steps back in shock. He can barely stand, his whole body trembling, tears glistening in his eyes.

"I have no one else but you," he finally says.

"But that's no reason..." Jimin grimaces. "You shouldn't..." He can't even finish.

"Then stay with me."

"I can't!"

"Then you have no feelings for me at all!" Jungkook finds strength in his anger, then, clenching his fists, turns around and quickly disappears from sight.

Jimin remains standing. He stands there for a long time, unable to move, processing what happened and thinking about his friend's words. Jungkook isn't just a spoiled kid who wants everything his way. He's someone who has lost everything dear to him in life and is desperately clinging to the last island of joy. He's just trying not to lose the one thing that keeps his will to live. And Jimin took that away from him. Cruelly snatched away the only friend and the activity that could inspire him. How heartless he turns out to be... Perhaps Jungkook is right. Can a loving person really act like this? Can he prioritize his own well-being by throwing the person he loves into an abyss?

What a worthless piece of shit he is...

Jimin squats down and covers his head with his hands. He desperately wants to hide from this disgusting reality.

***

He tries to choose his own well-being. He tries to forget the pain he caused Jungkook. He tries not to think about his words, not to worry about his feelings, but it doesn't work. Jungkook achieved what he wanted—he made Jimin realize what he had done.

So when, a couple of days later, Park approaches Jungkook's school, acceptance reigns in his soul. Yes, it will hurt him, but at least he can see him. Friendship isn't so bad either; many would be happy with just that. Jimin stops not far from the gate and watches the students leaving. Exams are getting closer, and most of the kids look tired and burdened.

And suddenly, Jungkook appears. But not alone. He's walking with a girl and talking about something. Jimin's jaw tightens, and he immediately wants to turn around and forget his crazy idea. What made him think he could handle this? His gaze sticks to the girl who is most likely Soyeon, and Jimin notes how beautiful she is. The girl is truly lovely: with a small, pleasant face, clear fair skin, and long chestnut hair. She looks at Jungkook as if she's ready to give him the whole world, and it kills Jimin that she can actually give him what he needs. No one will stop her from loving him, from becoming his wife and the mother of his children. No one will look sideways at her when she holds his hand and introduces him as her beloved. They can have a wonderful future, and Jimin is terribly, painfully envious of her.

But for now, Jungkook came to him. For now, he asks for his attention, considers him a precious person, and Jimin changes his mind about retreating. He calls out to his friend as Jeon passes through the gate, making Jungkook literally jump in place from surprise and unconcealed joy. Jungkook says goodbye to Soyeon and immediately runs over to Jimin.

"Hyung! What are you doing here? I thought you didn't want to see me anymore."

"I thought I'd be too bored without our cover dances," Park shrugs casually, and Jungkook breaks into a wide smile that immediately fills Jimin's chest with warmth.

Chapter Text

They no longer have English lessons and can only meet at the end of the day. So, knowing his grandfather wouldn't approve of this pastime instead of studying, Jungkook lies, saying he's going to a study session, and heads to Jimin's place. For high school students, staying at school until ten or eleven at night is normal, so Jungkook's actions don't raise any suspicion.

Jimin meets his friend at the entrance and wrinkles his nose from slight nervousness.

"Don't mind my roommate. He's gloomy and grumpy, but completely harmless and spends all his time in the loft."

"Are you sure we won't bother him?" Jung asks, fiddling with his backpack strap.

"As long as he has his headphones on, I'm sure he won't even notice us," Jimin replies, and Jungkook smiles contentedly.

"Doesn't he work?" Jeon asks as they climb the stairs.

"He does. But I don't think even he understands his own schedule. Actually, I think all he does is work. He's a producer or something like that. Not sure."

When Jimin and Jungkook enter, Min Yoongi only peeks out from his loft for a second and doesn't even take off his headphones while Park tries to introduce him to the guest. Jungkook, meanwhile, examines the space with interest. It's not big, but quite cozy: Jimin's bed is tucked under the roommate's domain, a wide sofa sits in the center of the room, and the kitchen is against the wall opposite the entrance.

"See? I told you." Jimin walks over to the kitchen island and sits on a high stool. "So, are we going to dance?"

"I don't know," Jungkook shrugs.

"You don't know? I thought you had a list of thirty songs ready," Jimin laughs, and Jungkook laughs too. They've decided to ignore the elephant in the room: not to talk about what Jungkook did and what Jimin is desperately trying to forget. They act as if nothing happened, but Park's heart still beats faster just from being near his friend.

"Actually, I had a couple of ideas. The song isn't new, but it's popular and would suit you well."

"Me?"

"Your dance style."

"My style?" Jimin asks, raising an eyebrow.

"What? Are you saying you don't have a style?" Jungkook retorts with a subtle challenge, not taking his eyes off his friend, who rests his head on his hand and smiles slyly.

"Oh, I definitely have a style," he drawls seductively. He doesn't know what's gotten into him, but the fact that his feelings are known gives him a certain freedom.

"I meant there are a lot of smooth movements," Jungkook smirks. "Here, look."

Jimin doesn't know if Jeon is doing it consciously or has no idea what he's doing, but instead of just putting the phone on the table, Jungkook gets up and stands next to Jimin, opening the dance video. And at that moment, Park says goodbye to the last of his concentration. All he can think about while they watch the dance practice is Jungkook's scent filling his lungs.

"Cool, right?" his friend points at the screen, but Jimin is looking at Jeon. At his smile, his growing-out black hair, his long eyelashes, and the blush spreading across his face.

"Are you hot?"

"A little," Jungkook replies and steps away from Park, exhaling slowly. He takes off his school blazer and untucks his shirt from his pants.

Damn. How good he looks in that white shirt...

"Do you work out?" Jimin suddenly asks, biting his tongue too late.

"I did when I lived in Busan. Not anymore," Jungkook replies a bit sadly. "So I'll be a scrawny guy again soon."

"I doubt it," Park mutters under his breath. And even if he did, it would still suit him.

"So, what do you think of the dance?"

"I like it," Jimin replies, and they start learning the moves.

With their experience, it goes quickly, and within an hour, the guys are polishing the imperfections. It takes a couple more sessions to make it perfect. Jungkook comes every evening, and they spend time training, after which they reward themselves with a bowl of ramen, chatting about everything, and forgetting about time.

"Shall we record tomorrow?" Jungkook asks on Saturday evening, when the dance is so polished it's starting to appear in their dreams. Jimin takes out two packs of noodles and opens them, ready to drop them into the boiling water. "Where do you think is best? Maybe in the park?"

"Can you toss one in for me, too?" Yoongi's head suddenly appears from the upper floor, and Jimin and Jungkook's eyes widen. They both sometimes forget there's someone else in the apartment because that someone barely shows any signs of life.

"Of course," Park replies, making a surprised face at Jungkook, which makes him laugh. "I'm not sure about the park: there will be tons of people. Want an egg?"

Jungkook nods.

"We don't have many options..." Jeon sighs and frowns thoughtfully. "Tomorrow, everywhere will be crowded."

They brainstorm for a few more minutes, throwing out various ideas, but don't come up with anything. And then Yoongi is suddenly next to them.

"For this song, an abandoned warehouse on the outskirts would be perfect. I can give you the address," he says with a completely expressionless face and saunters over to the pot.

"How do you know what song we're dancing to?" Jimin asks, surprised, as Yoongi serves himself some ramen.

"You might forget I live here, but I have eyes, I saw the dance," Min replies almost offendedly, and Jimin and Jungkook exchange glances. It turns out the guy really knows his stuff. They happily agree, and Yoongi heads back to his space.

Jimin starts filling the bowls, and Jungkook suddenly appears next to him.

"Spices?" he says with a mischievous look and, grabbing the jar, shakes a decent amount right into Jimin's food. Jimin's mouth drops open in shock.

"What are you doing?" Park laughs, shoving Jungkook.

"What, don't you like them?" Jeon replies innocently, his eyes sparkling with mischief.

"Not that much!" Jimin almost groans, still chuckling, and shoves Jungkook again. Jeon does the same, and they playfully wrestle, trying not to drop anything, but a bit of water still splashes onto the countertop. "What are you doing? Who's going to clean this up?!"

"You," Jungkook declares smugly, and Jimin jokingly raises his hand, making his friend run away. Sitting back down at the counter, he catches Yoongi's gaze, who is still standing by the stairs and wrinkling his brow in embarrassment.

"If you decide to make love, just don't do it in front of me. I have excellent hearing," the roommate says with the same unwavering calm and goes upstairs, leaving Jimin and Jungkook unable to look each other in the eye for a few seconds.

"So, tomorrow at eleven?" Jimin is the first to break the silence. "I'll send you the address."

"Sure," Jeon nods enthusiastically, devouring his ramen, and Park's gaze suddenly falls on the microwave clock.

"Damn, Jungkook, it's almost half past eleven! Isn't your grandfather looking for you yet?"

Jungkook turns to check the time and sighs discontentedly.

"Yeah, I have to go."

He quickly finishes the remains of food in his bowl, wipes his mouth with the back of his hand, grabs his things, kisses Jimin on the cheek, and leaves the apartment. Jungkook only realizes what he’s done while hurrying down the stairs, while Park is left in complete bewilderment.

Chapter Text

Starting a Sunday with a trip to an abandoned warehouse is undoubtedly an original activity, and perhaps not entirely well thought out. For a music video shoot, the place looks great, captivating with its atmosphere, but the vast, completely deserted area evokes certain thoughts.

"Are we going to get beaten up here?" Jimin says, glancing at entrances to countless barns, and immediately reassures himself. "Nah, we're in Korea, not in Brazilian favelas."

Jungkook, however, seems quite relaxed. Perhaps he sees it as just another adventure, as if he's come not to a godforsaken place where homeless people might live, but to a haunted house at an amusement park.

"Here?" Jungkook says, stopping and looking around. He takes out his phone, mounts it on a tripod, and checks the angle. "Not bad."

So, it's time to dance. The guys turn on the music, compose themselves, and lose themselves in the choreography. It goes smoothly and successfully. The moves are perfected to the point where they only need to reshoot a couple of times, and even then, only because Jimin decides to make it even better. Then they change the camera angle and start all over again.

The laughter doesn't reach the dancers straight away. They are so focused that they don't pay attention to the guys emerging from the neighboring building. And when a not-so-friendly-looking group positions itself not far away from them, Jungkook and Jimin don't know how to react.

"Well, look, we've got new K-pop stars here!" says a tall, bald stranger, and his four friends burst into laughter. Jungkook stops and walks over to his phone.

"You guys are idols? Won't you give us an autograph?" another man laughs.

"We're just dancing," Jungkook replies, almost rolling his eyes.

"Your music is bothering us. Can you just come onto someone else's turf and act like this without asking permission?" the bald one says again.

"Your turf?" Jimin takes a step forward. "Guys, did you buy this street or something?"

Irritation courses through his entire body. Park can't stand this kind of trash. They bothered him back in school, and that's exactly why he started Taekwondo: so he would never be weak in front of cruel and stupid people again.

"Yeah. And what are you filming there? Maybe I got in the shot?"

"We didn't even see you," Jungkook tries to say calmly. "Okay, we'll just leave."

He pulls Jimin by the hand, but Jimin continues to glare at the gang.

"Let's go, it's not worth dealing with them," Jeon says quietly, and the bald one smirks smugly.

"Listen to your boyfriend, pal. Not worth dealing with us."

"What did you say?" Jimin raises his voice, pulling his hand out of Jungkook's grip. His whole body vibrates with rage, and his face shows a readiness to fight for what's his, be it territory, rights, or honor.

"Jimin..." Jungkook steps forward, turning to face Park.

"Yeah, Jimin-ah, go on before your pretty little face gets messed up, you'll smudge your makeup."

Jimin doesn't even understand how it happens; he just notices the bald man staggering back when Jungkook punches him in the jaw. And then everything becomes a blur. Jungkook hits again, Jimin joins in, frantically remembering all his combat lessons, and suddenly they're fighting a gang that outnumbers them two and a half to one. And they're holding their own pretty well. However, to their great regret, they aren't the only ones who've trained to fight and improved their physiques. So, as soon as there's an opening, Jimin grabs Jungkook's hand and makes a run for it.

They sprint as fast as they can, hearing the gang chasing them and shouting threats. The guys only stop after about five minutes, having weaved through the warehouses. Making sure they've lost them, Jimin and Jungkook lean against a wall and slide to the ground, then start laughing nervously.

"We won't get attacked, we're in Korea!" Jungkook parodies with a smile and then suddenly winces in pain.

"Are you okay?" Jimin's face instantly turns serious, and he gently touches the cut on Jeon's cheekbone. Jungkook freezes, studying his friend. Their hearts are still pounding like crazy, but the adrenaline is fading, making room for the realization of the consequences. And the consequence is that tomorrow, they'll both be bruised.

"You should have seen the other guy," Jungkook smiles and winces again.

"I saw," Jimin nods proudly. "He was lying on the asphalt, clutching every possible part of himself. We're such idiots! Do you think we got enough footage?"

"More than enough," Jungkook laughs again.

"Your lip is split," Jimin says worriedly and reaches for his friend's face. It's not fun to look at him. To see him wince, to know he was hurt... It makes Jimin want to go back and beat those bastards up again, but for now, his heart just clenches. "God, Jungkook, does it hurt?"

Jeon jumps up sharply, pushing Jimin's hand away from his face, and this sudden rejection hurts more than all the blows from a few minutes ago. Jimin realizes the tone he used in that last sentence and how he involuntarily leaned in; he understands what made Jungkook recoil, and it... It hurts like hell.

He has never rejected him like that before. Never flinched away with disgust. It seemed Jungkook was always relatively comfortable. He wasn't shy, he wasn't ashamed. But now... those words got to him. The dirty insinuations, the looks... For the first time, he saw how they must look from the outside, and it disgusted him.

He has become disgusted by Jimin's feelings.

"Alright, let's go," Park says dryly, getting up. That's all he can force out without revealing the whirlwind of emotions inside. That's all he can do to help his friend's shame. The friend he puts in an awkward position every single day.

Jimin walks ahead slowly, limping slightly, not looking back at Jungkook. He knows the other isn't happy to see him right now. Most likely, he doesn't want anything to do with him at all. And that makes him want to die.

Chapter Text

They don't see each other for over a week. Jungkook has to lie to his grandfather, telling him he fell down the stairs at school, but the old man doesn't believe him at all. Fortunately, he doesn't know about Jimin, so his assumptions aren't even close to the truth. Meanwhile, Jungkook edits the video. He spends hours on it, battling conflicting feelings, and at one point even considers deleting everything. But he doesn't. Instead, he adds their little scuffle at the end of the video. Edited, of course, and made to look a bit more amusing than it was in reality, but still genuine. He doesn't know why he's doing it, but he uploads the video to the channel in that form, and within a day, it gets the most views and a huge number of comments. Some viewers even raise various social issues, and the video becomes a place for debate.

Because of his injuries, Soyeon starts caring for Jungkook even more. She brings him healthy food and a bunch of medicines, then sits for hours listening to his stories about what happened. Of course, Jungkook has to embellish the truth, as he can't just brush her off. The incident becomes the main topic of conversation for a couple of days and soon spawns numerous rumors, until someone finds the video and increases the channel's subscriber count by a couple of hundred.

After school, Jungkook sits on a bench under a tree, thoughtfully looking at his phone. The other students slowly leave the school building, and he notices Soyeon heading towards him. Her hair flows beautifully in the wind, and her face brightens when Jungkook waves. Without sending the message he was drafting, Jungkook puts his phone in his pocket and smiles.

"We're still going to the cafe, right?" the girl asks, sitting down next to him. "You promised."

"I have my tutoring session, you know."

"In an hour and a half. That's why we agreed on today, because we have some free time. We barely see each other with all this exam prep anyway," Soyeon pouts, looking into Jungkook's eyes. "Let's go, okay?"

"Sure." He can't keep refusing the girl forever.

"Great!" She literally bounces with excitement, and Jungkook smiles, watching her joy. Soyeon is sweet, and he's glad he can make her happy. If only making people happy was always this easy...

The cafe they go to is bright and spacious. Tables, shelves, and the floor are filled with various plants, and a pleasant scent fills your lungs the moment you step inside. Jungkook absolutely loves it here. He even feels a sense of connection with nature, sitting in the middle of bustling Seoul. A wonderful place with delicious food and soft music. He wonders if Jimin would like it here.

"What other hobbies do you have, besides dancing?" Soyeon asks. "You know, I used to dance too. Ballet. But it turned out it wasn't really for me, even though I liked it. Jungkook?"

"Huh?" Jeon snaps out of his thoughts and offers her a smile.

"You're not listening to me at all, are you?" Soyeon asks sadly, and for the first time, Jungkook detects notes of irritation in her tone.

"Sorry, I was thinking. I can't be late for my session."

"You're not even that interested in studying," Soyeon retorts, folding her arms. "But every time I ask you out on a date, you suddenly remember school. Are you not interested in me?"

"What? Why would you think that?" Jungkook frowns, embarrassed, and immediately tries to smooth things over. "You're very interesting."

"You're not even listening to me!" she exclaims. "You were the one who asked me out, Jungkook! But since then, you've only held my hand once. Do you even like me at all?"

Jungkook freezes. He wants to laugh at the absurd question, to assure her that, of course, he likes her, but he can't force a single word out. The truth is, he hasn't held her hand again because he didn't want to. He tried to, but he couldn't. She's objectively a lovely girl, and most guys at school would give anything to be in his place, but he... just doesn't care. He doesn't want to touch her or sit with her in a cafe discussing problems. He feels no urge to rush to her, to try to catch her eye or make her laugh. He just doesn't like her.

"No. I'm sorry."

He spends a long time afterward trying to convince himself that Soyeon just isn't right for him. That there will be another girl who will capture his attention. He tries to convince himself but realizes he's blatantly lying. Then he takes out his phone and finally sends that damned message: "Shall we meet up today? I found a new song."

But no reply comes, and with each passing minute, Jungkook feels worse.

He brought this on himself. He did it. He chose this. He decided. He wanted this. He was the one who didn't see him. He was the one who ran away. It was all him.

The thought hammers in his head during his extra lessons, like a nail being driven in, while his hand nervously fiddles with his phone.

He did it himself. He wanted it himself. Himself. He couldn't have expected anything else. Could he? Did he really think Jimin would tolerate any rude behavior from him? What sane person acts like that? No one, of course.

When the second lesson ends and the tutor for the third hasn't arrived yet, Jungkook goes down to the garden and, pacing back and forth, decides to call.

What will he say? Jungkook doesn't know. Apologize, probably. Ask for forgiveness? And then what? What will he say then?

"Yeah?" a sleepy mumble comes through, and Jungkook freezes solid. It seems he didn't actually expect an answer, even though he hoped and worried so much his hands were sweating.

"Hyung, hi! Long time no see! Did you read my message?" Jungkook starts, overly cheerful.

" Jungkook?" Jimin replies, sounding strained, and Jeon's heart twinges. "No, sorry, I'm sick. Sleeping. What did you want?"

"You're sick?" Jungkook immediately forgets his poorly prepared speech. "With what? What happened?"

"Seems like a cold. Or the flu. Not sure. I'll call when I feel better. Or you call. Or don't. Whatever," Jimin mumbles uncertainly, and Jungkook frowns. What a jerk! Jungkook really managed to cripple their friendship like this.

"I'm coming over."

"What?" Jimin says barely audibly and coughs loudly twice. "No, no. Even Min Yoongi ran away from me, afraid of getting sick, so don't even think about it."

"Are you alone?"

"Yeah. As I said, I'm resting. Go study, Jungkook, don't you have lessons?"

"But I..."

"Go," Jimin says seriously and hangs up.

Study? Is he kidding? Everything inside him is restless with worry, and Jungkook takes off. He runs to his room, simultaneously dialing his tutor's number, and grabs his things.

"Sorry for calling so late, but something urgent came up, and I can't make it today. Sorry again. Of course, we'll pay for the session," Jungkook mutters quickly and flies out of the house gates within minutes.

The whole way there, he's more nervous than he ever was during an exam. Of course, Jimin isn't dying; Jungkook knows that. He also knows his friend doesn't want to see him. But he hurries anyway, running up the stairs and tapping his fingers feverishly on the bus.

When he enters Jimin's apartment, it's already getting dark. The orange sun brightly illuminates the houses as a final farewell, reflecting off the windowpanes, and Jungkook takes one last look at it before entering the apartment code.

It's quiet inside. Tissues are scattered on the bedside table, medicines and cups are set out.

"Min Yoongi?" Jimin asks hoarsely, turning from facing the wall.

"No, it's me," Jungkook says timidly, placing bags of medicine and soup on the kitchen counter.

"Jungkook?" Jimin forces his eyes open and pushes himself up on his elbows. He's terribly pale and thin. "I told you not to come, I'm contagious!"

Park tries to sound stern, but Jungkook refuses to listen. He takes out a bottle of medicine, opens it, and hands it to his friend.

"Drink this," he commands, and Jimin glances at it confusedly, but then, unable to withstand Jungkook 's insistent gaze, obeys. "Now sleep."

"I have medicine."

"Sleep, I said," Jungkook orders and starts tidying up.

Jimin wakes up again at eleven in the evening. The entire apartment is spotless, the soup is put away in the fridge, and Jungkook is quietly reading on the sofa.

"You're still here?" Park asks, turning towards Jungkook, almost sounding displeased.

"Are you better already?" Jeon raises his eyebrows, indicating he won't listen to any more stupid orders.

"Well, I'm feeling better. You can go."

"Yeah, sure, definitely," Jungkook brushes him off and goes to the fridge, takes out the soup, pours it into a bowl, and puts it in the microwave. "Eat first."

"I don't want to."

"You have to. I'm not going anywhere until you eat."

Jimin has no choice but to agree: Jungkook is completely unwilling to back down. So when he's handed a bowl with a spoon, Park obediently sits down and starts eating. Jungkook sits on the bed by his feet.

"Maybe you'll stop looking pale as death," Jungkook remarks in a mentor-like tone, making Jimin self-consciously reach for his face and start fixing his hair, but his hand is immediately caught. "You're still handsome, don't worry."

Jungkook smiles tenderly, and Jimin smiles back. He can't help it, no matter how bad he feels, and something inside Jungkook seems to ease. He watches Jimin eat, then takes the bowl.

"Now go home."

"Yeah. Lie down and sleep," Jungkook says, adjusting the blanket, and this time Jimin doesn't even argue. He just turns back to the wall and closes his eyes. Jungkook sits down beside him. He doesn't want to bother him, but he doesn't feel like leaving at all, so he just watches Jimin sleep, thinking about all the stupid things he's done. He listens to the even breathing, studies his face, examining every feature, and then simply rests his head on the pillow and buries his face in the back of Jimin's head. This is the scent he loves most. The one that makes his heart beat faster, and warmth spreads through his chest. The one that reminds him of love and home.

Chapter Text

Lessons resume. Jimin and Jungkook still don't talk about what happened, ignoring anything that even slightly crosses the boundaries of friendship. They pretend nothing happened and simply continue from where they left off. And where they left off was at one and a half million views.

"What?" Jimin's eyes widen at the number, and he stares at Jungkook, who just chuckles contentedly.

"Advertisers are already knocking at the door. But no decent ones yet," Jungkook informs him with a smile. They're sitting on the sofa in Jimin's apartment on a Sunday morning, sipping coffee. "So we need to think carefully about the next dance."

"I doubt anything will top the fight in the last one," Jimin says, to which Jungkook just shrugs. It's true, but they can't just quit now. They've gained many more subscribers, and the audience probably doesn't expect the guys to go looking for trouble in every video.

"How about a female choreography?" Jungkook suggests reaching for a tissue. He didn't catch a serious cold, but he did end up with an annoying runny nose.

"I told you I was contagious," Jimin scolds him for the umpteenth time.

"I couldn't not come," Jeon replies with genuine bewilderment, and Jimin doesn't want to argue with that, so he just returns to the previous topic.

"Female?"

"Why not? A cool new song just came out yesterday. I think we can pull it off."

"We probably can..." Park ponders. The idea isn't bad and will attract additional attention.

"Hyung, the moves are so cool!" Jungkook begins to describe. He gestures with his hands, then gets up from the sofa and mimics elements of the choreography against the window. The sunlight floods the floor and the dancer, harmonizing with the sparkle in his eyes and the brightness of his smile, making Jimin stare, transfixed. Jungkook is full of infectious enthusiasm, and Jimin's entire body fills with incredible delight. How he loves this guy... He doesn't care that he can't have more; even the simple opportunity to be near him and watch him like this is precious.

After demonstrating everything he remembers, Jungkook collapses back onto the sofa, scooting right up next to Jimin, and pulls out his phone.

"Look, look!" he lightly taps his friend's arm and continues to smile dazzlingly. During the conversation, he touches Jimin about ten times, and each light touch resonates throughout Park's entire body. Does Guk not understand what he's doing? Or is he teasing on purpose? Jimin finds himself asking this question not for the first time, and it stubbornly digs into his thoughts.

"Jungkook..." Jimin blurts out. The word flies out sharply, like from a tightly pulled slingshot, and Park realizes what he's done, too late.

"Hm?" Jungkook turns his head towards his friend, ending up a damned ten centimeters from his face, and waits for him to continue with absolute innocence.

"What are you doing?" Jimin begins and suddenly feels his throat tighten. What will he say? 'Don't you understand what feelings you're stirring in me? I'm going crazy!' And where would that lead? Jungkook would get embarrassed, move away, apologize, and distance himself again? Realize that a friendship that suits both of them is impossible? Is there even a way out of this situation? So why the hell is he sabotaging everything? "...on Sunday. I think we can record then."

"Yeah," Jeon nods, suspecting nothing, and Jimin almost clutches his heart. He really needs to start controlling his verbal outbursts.

But sometimes he genuinely doesn't understand. GENUINELY doesn't understand why Jungkook acts this way. Maybe he's never liked anyone, so he doesn't know what it's like to be near the object of his desire?

"Have you ever been in love?"

Well... there it is again. Apparently, he'll start thinking before he speaks... tomorrow.

Jungkook is taken aback. He looks at Jimin, who changed the topic so abruptly, blinking, and then moves away slightly.

"I don't think so."

The question "And you?" remains unasked. Of course, because he knows the answer. Jimin told him himself. And the situation becomes even more awkward. Well done, Park Jimin, you sure know how to ruin the mood.

"You fell for someone a while ago, right?" Jeon surprises Jimin by asking a question after a few seconds. He skillfully avoided the forbidden topic, though...

But Jimin doesn't want to discuss this any more than the other. He lowers his head, once again thinking about what a failure he is. What a freak... Why couldn't he just be born normal? Then he wouldn't suffer from feelings that embarrass those they're directed at. And most other people, too, to be honest. Then he and Jungkook could just be friends...

"Hyung, sorry, I shouldn't have asked," Jungkook suddenly says, and Jimin realizes he's on the verge of tears. He's probably red as a tomato. No wonder Jungkook feels uncomfortable. "Prying into things that are none of my business."

"No, it's fine. Nothing special," Jimin shakes his head and straightens up. "Yeah, I had feelings for someone who didn't return them. So, nothing new," he jokes, forcing a smile.

Park feels Jungkook's intense, probably pitying, gaze on him even without turning, and it makes him despise himself even more. The last thing Jimin wants is for Jungkook to pity him. It's hard to imagine anything more humiliating.

"Will you tell me about it?"

"No, I definitely won't," Jimin says confidently, getting up from the sofa and running his hands through his hair. He walks over to the window and stares at the rooftops.

"It was a guy, right?" Jungkook asks as if he wants to corner Jimin. But why? He knows, he must suspect. Isn't it as clear as day?!

"I don't want to talk about it, Jungkook. Understood?" Jimin states, turning to face his friend and shoving his hands into the pockets of his sweatpants.

"Why? Are you ashamed of it?" Jeon raises his voice, stunning Jimin. He also stands up and approaches Park, studying his face. "Ashamed of yourself? That you fell in love with someone? You shouldn't be ashamed of that! There's nothing wrong with it!"

He's almost shouting, and Jimin freezes in shock. He didn't expect this. At all. But where is this reaction coming from?

"You didn't choose this! It's just nature! Are you going to blame nature now? Try to turn yourself into someone else?" Jungkook continues loudly, clenching his fists. His face is covered in red blotches, and only when he meets no resistance from his friend does Jung realize what he's doing. Breathing heavily, he takes a step back and lowers his gaze.

They are silent for about half an hour. Jimin quietly finishes his coffee and tidies up the apartment, while Jungkook sits at the counter, watching videos. When the guys start talking again, the oppressive atmosphere is gone, and Jungkook's fiery speech seems like a distant dream.

"So, shall we go to that cafe we picked out?" Jungkook asks.

"Let's," Jimin replies enthusiastically. "And then we'll come back and start on the dance, yeah?"

"Yeah." Jungkook gets up and quickly washes his coffee cup. Jimin changes his clothes, and a minute later, they are ready to leave. "I just hope we don't have to go to a warehouse this time. What a great friend you have: sent us into the hands of thugs, abandoned you when you were sick..."

"Min Yoongi isn't my friend," Jimin says, stuffing necessary items into his pockets. "He's withdrawn and barely talks. Sometimes he sits for hours, listening to music and staring at one spot. It's even scary."

Jimin smirks, and his playful mood immediately transfers to his friend.

"And you stole headphones from a guy like that? You must really love me," Jeon says casually, stepping out the door.

"I didn't love you back then," Jimin replies just as calmly, heading down the stairs.

Chapter Text

The days fly by quickly and intensely. September gives way to October, October to November. One video replaces another, and thousands of views become millions. The channel grows, and after a few weeks of rapid ascent, the guys start collaborating with advertisers. They spend more and more time doing what they love, and now they even get paid for it.

People in the comments admire their moves, style, and looks, and Jungkook and Jimin love to lounge on the sofa in the evenings, scrolling through the feedback and chuckling contentedly. The attention is flattering, boosts their self-esteem, and whispers that their lives might not be as dreary as they imagined.

"You guys, your chemistry is palpable even through the screen," reads one of the English comments they don't discuss. Actually, there are many like it. Viewers often ask about their relationship and speculate, but Jimin and Jungkook don't know how to respond.

And with December comes the main fear of most high school seniors—the Suneung (CSAT). The third Thursday of November looms on the horizon, and Jungkook spends more and more time studying. Whether he wants to or not. His grandfather simply wouldn't understand any other pastime before the most important exam of his life. So Jungkook only comes to Jimin's for an hour and often falls asleep on his bed or sofa.

One day, Jimin is woken by his phone ringing. He jolts, lifting his head sharply and bumping into a sleepy Jungkook. It's already morning outside, and Jimin suddenly realizes they slept through the night: they passed out while watching videos on the bed. Jungkook never went home, and now his grandfather is calling him. A flicker of panic crosses Jeon's face as he realizes what's happening, and his gaze darts to Jimin, seeking an answer to the silent question.

"Can you say you fell asleep at school?"

"They would have woken me up," Jungkook shakes his head, gripping the still-ringing phone tighter. He winces as if expecting a blow, then presses the button. "Hello?"

"Where are you, Jungkook?" Jimin hears the grandfather's anxious voice. "You didn't come home last night? What happened?"

"Ah..." Jungkook drags out. "Nothing. I just fell asleep. I'm at a friend's... We were studying for the exam together. Sorry."

The grandfather falls silent for a moment, presumably processing the information, then says:

"Alright, I'll send a car for you, text me the address."

"No need!" Jungkook replies quickly. "I'm already on my way out. I'll be home soon."

He ends the call and starts hurriedly gathering his things, running around the apartment like a wound-up toy. Jimin just watches the spectacle thoughtfully, then falls back onto the pillow and smirks.

The Suneung takes place two days later. Throughout his university classes, Jimin is just as nervous as the test-takers themselves, constantly checking his messages. He knows Jungkook can't text him because phones are banned during the exam, but he hopes he at least read his well-wishes from the morning. It seems if he could, Jimin would have gone to the temple to pray with the students' relatives, but at the same time, Park understands that doing well on the exam won't bring Jungkook happiness. It will only please his grandfather and set him on a typical, expected path. But Jimin isn't sure if that's Jungkook's path. So he convinces himself that it wouldn't be the end of the world if Jungkook didn't do well. But he's not sure about that either.

The day drags on unbearably long, but around six o'clock, Jungkook finally appears on Park's doorstep.

"I almost ran to your school," Jimin admits as Jungkook enters the apartment and exhales, releasing the tension. "How did it go?"

"As expected," Jungkook shrugs. "I won't be a SKY university student."

"Maybe it's not that bad?"

"Yeah, maybe it's even worse," Jungkook smirks, and Jimin sits on the arm of the sofa where his friend lies down. "Do you think I'm worried about it?"

Jungkook obviously notices the sympathetic expression on Park's face and hurries to explain himself. But Jimin doesn't need to be told about his friend's interests; he's just as informed as Jungkook himself.

"I know you're not. But how will your grandfather react?"

"He'll be disappointed," Jeon concludes sadly. "But he's used to it."

"You're really not worried?" Jimin decides to get a final confirmation and, lifting Jungkook's legs, sits down on the sofa.

"Honestly?" Jungkook bends his knees and moves closer to Jimin. "I'm even a little glad. There's a kind of freedom in it, you know... I know what everyone expects from me: grandfather, teachers, society... But I really don't want to do this. I don't want to become the perfect student and run a company in the future. I'm not interested in any of that at all. And yes, I know I sound like a spoiled lazy brat, but..."

"No," Jimin interrupts. "You're not lazy. When you're motivated, you work harder than many people can even dream of. I've seen it. You're very talented, Jungkook, and it would hurt me to watch you force yourself into a box because of other people's expectations. Just do what you love, and you'll be successful."

A bright, gentle smile appears on Jungkook's face, and he gives Jimin a grateful look.

"You sound like my parents," he whispers, touching Jimin's fingers and starting to fiddle with them.

"Yeah?"

"Yeah. No one has supported me like that in a long time, hyung. Thank you."

Jungkook reaches for Jimin and pulls him into a tight, long hug. He buries his face in Jimin's neck, and however much he might want to, Jimin can't help but react. His whole body tenses and pulls Jungkook closer. Park wants to dissolve in his scent and never let go. To touch his hair, his skin, and whisper how much he loves him. And the fact that he can't breaks his heart. Jimin doesn't want to pull away.

When Jungkook pulls back, Park is still dazed. His hand slides to Jeon's cheek, brushing away a strand of hair, and his face leans closer. His gaze falls on Jungkook's lips, and a hot desire spreads in his stomach. He knows he's doing the wrong thing, that he's about to ruin everything again, but he physically can't stop himself.

And for some reason, Jungkook doesn't run away.

"Aren't you bothered by my feelings?" Jimin asks, hoping to see a boundary while still stroking Jungkook's head. What is he not allowed to do? Someone, tell him, please, because he's losing his mind. He's just melting under this enticing gaze, in which he thinks he sees a certain... submission?

"The possibility bothers me," Jungkook replies. "Of what will happen if I accept them."

Something pierces Jimin at these words, and he freezes, his gaze glued to his friend. The probability and hope turn everything inside him upside down, multiplying his desire and clouding his mind. It even becomes hard to breathe. What did he just say? Accept?

"Have you thought about accepting them?" Jimin asks, his voice hoarse. Has Jungkook really been considering such a thing? Why? It's not because Jimin wore him down or practically blackmailed him with his attention, is it?

"Every day."

They stare intently at each other, and it turns everything inside out. It feels like a bridge stretches between them at this moment, establishing a connection that didn't exist before, and Jimin's whole body responds to it. He closes his eyes and slowly exhales. His hands begin to tremble. Every day? Every day?!

"You can't say things like that... Jungkook, you can't say things like that to me..." Jimin says, covering his face with his hands. He wants to laugh hysterically. What kind of joke is this?

"Don't look away." Jungkook touches Jimin's chin, forcing him to look at him again, and Park's strength rapidly leaves him. He’s suffered from unrequited love for months, wanted his friend like a madman, and now he can't hold back anymore. Not when Jungkook's inviting him in. "Don't run away from me."

Jimin wants to ask if Jungkook realizes what he's doing, but he can't utter a single word: he just moves closer, guided by an unknown force, and soon feels heavy, hot breath on his face. Jungkook's lips are slightly parted, and so tempting that he no longer has the strength to resist.

He doesn't know which of them kisses the other first, but the moment their lips meet, an electric shock pierces his body, stripping away the last remnants of reason. His hands bury themselves in Jungkook's hair, pulling him closer, his body leans forward, and his tongue slides into the other's mouth, meeting a similar desire. Jungkook kisses passionately, greedily, in a way Jimin didn't expect, making his head spin and completely robbing him of his will. It seems in this moment, he belongs to him entirely, and Jimin gasps for air with desire when he finds himself under Jungkook's strong body. His erection presses against Jeon's thigh, and Jimin can't suppress a moan that escapes him.

Jungkook pulls away sharply. It hurts. He lowers his eyes, breathing heavily. Blushing like a tomato and looking around confusedly.

Jimin doesn't know what to say. He doesn't understand what happened. Why? Jungkook said he wasn't attracted to men. Is it that he just didn't know, or that he felt pressured to accept Jimin's feelings?

"I... I should go," Jungkook stammers and stumbles a couple of times on his way to the door. He leaves the apartment as suddenly as he appeared, and Jimin just touches his lips, convincing himself that he didn't imagine it.

Chapter Text

Jungkook disappears again, and all the time spent without him, Jimin literally eats himself alive. The uncertainty and the lack of understanding torment Park, making him sick once more. As before, his body can't handle the stress and succumbs to the first illness it encounters. But this time, Jungkook doesn't come. Now he only appears in dreams, torturing Jimin with sweet fantasies and the return to the cruel reality.

He's been gone for three weeks, but Jimin doesn't seek meetings because he doesn't know how they could help. He misses him like crazy, constantly replaying their kiss in his head, but he doesn't even call; he just stares at his phone day and night. But then anxiety overcomes him.

"Just tell me you're okay," Park finally texts at the beginning of the third week of December. The exam results are due any day now, adding to the already massive pile of worries.

The reply doesn't come immediately—it takes an hour—but it helps him calm down a little. "I'm okay," Jungkook writes. They don't communicate anymore that day.

Jimin finds support again in Hoseok, who starts worrying about his friend and isn't shy about expressing it.

"You're barely eating," Hyung says reproachfully, and Jimin, walking down the street, turns around in confusion, as if to find the friend who's watching him.

"How would you know that?"

"Yoongi told me," Hoseok replies calmly, making the other's eyebrows shoot up.

"Yoongi told you? YOONGI told you?" Park repeats, unable to contain his amazement. "Since when is he 'Yoongi'? Since when do you two talk?"

"You gave me his number yourself," Hyung says carefree and almost surprised.

"But I didn't think you'd actually call him," Jimin smirks.

"So you gave me his number just so it would look pretty in my address book?" Hoseok jokes, to which Jimin just continues shaking his head. He approaches a bus stop and stands away from the people. It's cold and cloudy outside. He wants to go back to the apartment and crawl under a warm blanket, but the thought of home brings back memories of what happened on the couch, and Jimin quickly switches his attention.

"So, are you friends now?"

"Well... we talk," Hoseok drawls. "He's cool, actually. Knows so much about music! He sent me his composition for a dance yesterday."

Jimin just stands there, eyes wide. He's lived with Min Yoongi for almost two years now and knows him less well than Hoseok, who's only been talking to him for a couple of months. And they've never even met!

"Anyway—eat! That's my main message," Hyung laughs again. "Don't worry so much; everything will work out. I told you he likes you..."

"What?" Jimin laughs nervously. "Does this look like he likes me? He shot out of my place like a bullet and hasn't shown signs of life for almost a month! It seems more like he desperately wants to forget I exist."

"Stop being so dramatic!" Jimin can literally hear Hyung rolling his eyes. "Don't you think it might be hard for him to accept himself and his feelings? God, Jimin, even you go through phases of self-disgust from time to time. But his behavior isn't at all like someone who can't wait for you to get lost from his life. Maybe you can help each other accept yourselves."

The bus arrives right as Hoseok finishes his pompous speech, and Jimin, nodding, ends the call. He doesn't know if he agrees with his friend. It all seems like either dreams disconnected from reality or something that rings true. But Jimin knows he'll go crazy if he thinks about it nonstop, so he just gets on the bus and heads to work.

Jimin returns home at around nine, when fluffy snowflakes are falling heavily outside. He wearily climbs the stairs and suddenly finds Jungkook sitting by the window in the hallway. His heart leaps, and everything inside him pulls him to rush to him, hug him, burst into tears, and hit him. Only now does Jimin realize how afraid he was that he'd never see him again. Only now, when the spring has uncoiled, does he realize how tightly it was compressed.

"Why are you here?" Park tries to ask calmly. "You know the code..."

"It seemed wrong to go in without you," Jungkook replies quietly. He looks guilty, dejected, and defeated, and Jimin dislikes it immensely.

"Is Min Yoongi not here?" he asks, and Jungkook shrugs. "I thought you weren't coming back."

The admission comes out a bit more emotional than Jimin planned, but he can't avoid the topic. This bastard disappeared for almost a month. A whole month! He deserves a beating for that alone...

"Did you really think that?" Jungkook asks, and Jimin nods meekly. "I tried. I can't."

"Tried to run away from me? Or from yourself?" Jimin asks, slightly irritated, walking to the door and entering the code. The moment Jungkook appears, anger arises. Park realizes these emotional swings are starting to exhaust him. Most likely, in a couple of minutes, he'll be ready to forgive Jungkook everything again, but for now, indignation gives him strength.

They enter the apartment, and Jimin looks around, checking if his roommate is home. Yoongi isn't there. Well, convenient: they can fight and ruin everything for good.

"This is why I didn't come," Jungkook says, drilling a hole in the floor with his gaze. "Because I can't answer those questions."

Jimin purses his lips and looks out the window. He really feels like laughing. And for some reason, he feels he's about to say something that will push Jungkook away forever. But Jimin isn't ready to just take him back as if nothing happened. Not again.

"Jungkook, are you messing with me?" Park hisses through his teeth, and an icy wave washes over his body. His inner voice screams at him to shut up now, but Jimin continues. There are still remnants of pride and self-love. "Do you have any idea what you're putting me through?"

"I know," Jungkook says quietly.

"You know?" So he knows? He KNOWS?! Jimin nods several times and gives a bitter smile. "You can't do this to me! You can't play with my feelings! You can't kiss me and disappear for a whole fucking month! Are you trying to drive me crazy?"

Jimin grabs his head and takes a step toward Jungkook. He retreats.

So this is it?

"Get out," Jimin says coldly, trying with all his might not to break down. "Get out. I can't do this anymore! I don't know if it's because you have no other close people, or because I remind you of home, but you can't use me as you please! I'm a human being, Jungkook!" Jimin comes right up to his friend, not taking his eyes off his face. Jungkook continues to look at the floor.

"I'm sorry."

"I don't need your apologies. I don't need your apologies, Jungkook!"

The anger gradually subsides, and Jimin sees more clearly what he's doing. Tears well up in his eyes, and he realizes that Jeon will leave now and never come back.

He won't come, and Jimin will want to die.

He's tempted to scream at Jungkook to just make up his mind, but he knows what his friend will choose. There was never another option; the question was only how long Jimin could endure such a friendship. And is this really it? Is he out of strength?

Does he have the strength to never see him again?

"Do you want me to leave?" Jungkook asks quietly, as if summarizing Park's thoughts, and Jimin smiles at the irony of fate. Here it is, the main question: what does he really want?

'I want you to stay. I want you to stay forever. But you can't,' rings in his head, but Jimin only says a quiet "no" and takes off his outerwear.

"Do you want ramen?" he asks, walking to the kitchen counter while Jungkook still stands by the door.

Yes, this is a fucking toxic relationship.

Well, then, be it.

Chapter Text

On the day the "Suneung" results are announced, they meet at a cafe. Jimin has some time before his students, and Jungkook is eager to share the news.

"So?" Hyeong asks impatiently, leaning closer and almost lying on the table.

"As expected," Jungkook replies calmly. "It's not all bad, but the path to SKY is definitely closed for me."

"And what does your grandfather plan to do?"

"I don't know. I have no idea what he's decided to do with my life," Jeon says sarcastically. This kind of relationship is obviously incredibly irritating to him.

"He didn't discuss it with you?"

"He's not very good at that. Issuing orders is more his style. Actually, every day I understand more and more why Dad ran away from him. I can't wait to come of age!" Jungkook exclaims, leaning back in his chair. "Of course, it won't really change much, but at least I'll be able to breathe more freely. By the way, what are you doing for the New Year, Hyeong?"

Jimin thinks. What is he doing? Nothing, really. Staying home and studying.

Park shrugs, and a pleased smile lights up Jeon's face.

"Then shall we celebrate together? Let's go to Itaewon; it's sure to be fun there…"

"Sure," Jimin says, surprised. He hadn't thought he'd be able to celebrate with Jungkook, but the other probably wants to celebrate turning twenty. Of course, he wouldn't say no to that.

In the week remaining before the New Year, Jimin and Jungkook record two more covers. They finally return to their channel and receive increasingly enthusiastic feedback. Their subscriber count grows, and the money suddenly allows Jimin to drop one student and dedicate more time to dancing.

And then the thirty-first of December arrives. The streets and shops are glowing with fairy lights and boasting fluffy Christmas trees, Christmas melodies are playing everywhere, and the atmosphere is festive. Even though it's not a traditional Korean holiday at all, Jimin is glad his country has adopted some Western customs—another reason to have fun is never a bad thing.

Itaewon feels more like a district in Europe than in South Korea: foreigners are everywhere, and various establishments become venues for celebration. Jimin and Jungkook choose a cozy cafe for a start, and as soon as the clock hand passes twelve, they head to a bar. Now Jungkook can officially drink, and he has no intention of missing such an opportunity.

However, besides alcohol, the guys are in for a surprise: as soon as they enter, they spot Min Yoongi in a large group of friends, and he absolutely doesn't wait for them to come and greet him.

"Oh, look who's here!" he shouts almost across the entire hall, breaking into a wide smile.

"He's drunk," Jimin whispers into Jungkook's ear as they approach the completely unfamiliar company.

"And this is my favorite couple," Yoongi introduces them to his friends, and Jimin is quick to assure everyone otherwise.

"We're not a couple," he corrects his roommate and repeats it again, addressing Hyeong's friends.

"No judgment here, man. Even if you were…" some foreigner says and extends his hand. Jimin shakes it awkwardly and sits down in a freed-up spot.

"These are my friends from work," Yoongi says, leaning close to Jimin, almost onto his shoulder, while Jimin just stares in shock at his friend, who has managed to turn into a completely different person. "Jungkook turns twenty today!"

"Oh, we definitely have to drink to that!" exclaims some already quite drunk guy from the group and hands Jungkook a shot glass. He throws a quick glance at Jimin and happily accepts it. He was planning to get drunk anyway, and if someone else is paying, even better.

The group raises various kinds of glasses and downs them in one go. Jungkook winces at the strength but still smiles. His demeanor radiates satisfaction with his freedom, and Jimin admires this version of Kook.

They spend about an hour with Yoongi's friends, then, after a trip to the restroom, decide to find a quieter place. The coolness of the street sobers them up a bit, and the guys take a deep breath of the frosty air.

"They're so loud," Jungkook groans, laughing, and Jimin nods. He never would have thought Min Yoongi had friends like that. Or that he had any friends at all. "But they're cool."

"Yeah. Well, shall we take a walk?"

They walk through the crowded streets of Itaewon, slowly making their way between groups of people. The venues are packed: people are standing outside, even in the fairly cold weather. Music, voices, and laughter come from everywhere; the air smells of alcohol and food.

"Maybe we shouldn't have left the bar," Jungkook says, realizing they'll be looking for another place for a long time, but Jimin just frowns, searching for somewhere to go.

They duck into a quieter alley and exhale, as if they've finally managed to gulp fresh air. It's much darker here and almost empty, but there are some venues up ahead, too. One of the places turns out to be a club. There's almost no one outside, but whenever a visitor exits, briefly opening the door, the sound of loud music bursts onto the street.

"Shall we go in?" Jungkook asks, and Jimin, after scanning the building with his eyes, shakes his head.

"Nah. That's a gay club, Jungkook."

Jeon freezes for a couple of seconds, then continues, completely nonchalant:

"So what? Let's check it out. It looks fun," Jungkook's reply surprises Jimin, and he can only watch wide-eyed as his friend confidently climbs the stairs. In Korea, nobody does this. Nobody goes to a gay club because it might be fun; usually, these places are avoided like the plague and shouldn't be associated with in any way. But Jungkook is going. And Jimin has no choice but to follow him.

Inside, it's dark and noisy. A crowd of people is bumping together on the dance floor to loud music, groups and couples are sitting at the tables, and Jimin slows down. He expects that once Jungkook notices all this and decides he's seen enough, he'll turn around and head for the exit. Some guys by the wall are whispering something clearly lewd to each other, girls are dancing a rather explicit dance, but Jeon Jungkook, who is supposed to be straight, looks perfectly confident in this place.

"Where are you going? Do you seriously want to stay here?" Jimin practically shouts, taking Jungkook by the elbow and pulling him closer.

"Well, why not? It's fun here. Let's dance!"

Well, if they're going to dance, they're going to dance. Jimin won't refuse something like that; he'll just tell Jungkook later that he warned him.

They make their way almost to the middle of the dance floor and give themselves over to the infectious music. There isn't enough space for complex moves, so the guys just shift from foot to foot. However, it must be admitted, even in these simple movements, Jungkook looks incredibly sexy. The skinny jeans and the slightly unbuttoned black shirt have been driving Jimin crazy for a while, and now, as Jungkook moves quite deliberately seductively to the beat, Park's willpower is rapidly abandoning him.

Someone from behind pushes him towards Jungkook, and they end up pressed against each other, but Jeon only smiles. None of this bothers him. He doesn't feel like scorching lava is spreading through his veins. He doesn't feel the attraction that he no longer has the strength to fight. For him, it's simple; he's just having fun, and for a second, Jimin thinks he's being played with again. But then Jungkook simply puts a hand on his shoulder, and Jimin is almost convinced of his guess. It's hot on the dance floor, they are practically pressed against each other and moving in the same rhythm, so much so that Jimin starts feeling dizzy from Jungkook's scent, but none of this seems to faze his friend. He just moves closer and practically buries his face in Jimin's neck. Park can no longer control himself. His hand finds Jungkook's waist and pulls him closer, and his nose greedily inhales the scent of his cologne. Jimin touches strands of hair, an ear, and the neck, and intoxication takes stronger hold of his entire body. Park can no longer restrain the incredible desire to kiss, to be even closer, and, touching Jung's cheek with his nose, he moves to the lips. And then he's simply kissed. Briefly, but so damn sweetly… Jimin and Jungkook pull apart and look into each other's eyes with desire. The heat of their breath washes over their skin.

At that moment, Park grabs Jeon's wrist and leads him off the dance floor. He's never been in this club before, but he heads for the most secluded-looking spot and, seeing a slightly ajar door in a narrow hallway, pushes Jungkook through it. They find themselves in a small room with a sofa and a table, but Jimin isn't too concerned that they didn't book the private room: while they have time, they need to talk.

"What are you doing again?" Park demands, pushing Jeon against the wall. "What are you doing, Jungkook? Are you going to run away again later?"

But Kook just looks at him with a confused expression, as if surprised by the reaction, and Jimin concludes that Jungkook himself doesn't really understand what he's doing. They shouldn't have drunk so much… They really shouldn't have.

How can he do this? How can he act like this with him? How dare Kook look at him with those innocent eyes while looking like a tempter demon? Damn it, Jungkook, you're not a child anymore, you should understand what you're doing, what effect you're having…

"You're killing me," Jimin exhales hotly, bracing his hands on the wall on both sides of Jungkook and pressing his whole body against him. "You have no idea what you're doing to me…"

He switches to a whisper, suddenly feeling with incredible intensity that they are alone. There's no one here, and Jungkook is pinned in the corner. Who's going to stop Jimin now? Who's going to stop them? Only Jungkook can do that, but he's in no hurry. A bright desire scorches Jimin and concentrates low in his abdomen. His mind is gradually switching off, and his needs are taking over. Jimin presses harder against Jungkook and finally notices how heavily the other is breathing. Jeon swallows, lowering his eyes, but doesn't try to avoid the touch. And Jimin shamelessly takes advantage of it.

He runs his hand through Jungkook's hair, over his neck, his cheek, and stops at his lips, gently parting them. Jungkook closes his eyes and, evading, turns his head slightly away. Is he fighting himself? Fighting and losing absolutely, because he kisses Jimin's palm, then buries his face in it. Jimin watches this, unable to look away, and can't believe it. How long has he dreamed of something like this? And now Jungkook is doing it all in reality, and it's incredibly arousing. Even if he runs away later… Jimin wouldn't give up this minute for anything.

"Jungkook," escapes Park's lips, and Jeon lifts his gaze to him. He shouldn't have done that. Jimin has never seen so much desire and outright seduction in them before. His clouded eyes scream of need, and Jungkook's hands find Jimin's buttocks and pull him closer. As if there was any space left. They are already pressed flush together, and Park can feel just how much he is desired. It's driving him insane. He wants to grab Jungkook and make all his boldest fantasies come true, and he decides to seize the chance.

Smiling tenderly, Jimin covers Kook's lips with his own. Jungkook deepens the kiss immediately, as if he's been waiting for nothing else, and gives himself over to it completely, showing just how much he wants Jimin. Hands explore bodies, moans escape, and the desire for more becomes incredibly strong.

Jimin's lips travel down to Jungkook's neck, and his palm slides under the shirt, touching warm skin. He needs to be closer… To tear off these interfering clothes and feel Jungkook with his whole body. To explore, drowning in his scent…

The desire becomes unbearable, straining his pants, and Jimin grinds against Jeon's thigh.

"Jungkook…" he whispers again into his ear. "I can't take any more."

Jeon catches his gaze, and for a couple of seconds, a flicker of awareness crosses his eyes, but then he places a hand on Jimin's chest and turns him around, his back to the wall. This arouses Park even more. The dominance of the already strong and incredibly attractive Jeon is just lethal.

And suddenly, he drops to his knees. Jimin looks down in shock, a fleeting thought of protest crossing his mind, but his willpower isn't strong enough. Jungkook unzips Park's fly, freeing his rock-hard cock, and takes it into his mouth, tearing a loud moan from Park's lips. Jimin throws his head back. His legs feel weak, and he needs to hold onto something, so his fingers tangle in Jungkook's hair, his hips pushing forward.

This kind of bliss was beyond his wildest dreams. Even in his boldest fantasies, he couldn't have imagined how good it would feel to have sex with the real Jungkook. To have him deliver pleasure with such desire, pulling him out of reality. A sweet spasm racks his body, and Jimin comes onto the floor of the dimly lit room, then slumps down. Fortunately, there are napkins on the table.

Jungkook pulls away and slides down the wall.

"Give me a minute," he says, and Jimin crawls over to him.
"I know another way to bring you to your senses," Jimin whispers seductively, licking his lips and catching Kook's gaze.
"No," Jeon shakes his head, his breathing still not back to normal.
"Why? Afraid it'll make you gay?" Park smirks. "I've got news for you: you just gave me a blowjob, so you're already looking pretty gay."

Jungkook lets out a soft laugh and shyly lowers his gaze. A blush spreads across his cheeks again, and Jimin is enthralled by the sight.
"Not here. Later," Jungkook says, as if brushing him off, but his answer still gives Jimin hope.
"Fine. Later, I'm just going to devour you," Jimin whispers sweetly into Jungkook's neck, moving closer, and he almost feels goosebumps run down the other's spine.

Chapter Text

They don't remember the trip home very well. Still a little dazed, they leave the club, try not to cling to each other again, and say goodbye at the taxi. Then they part ways. Jimin rides home completely stunned, still unable to believe what happened, and by morning, he even wonders if it was all a dream. But a bright tremor is felt inside, and all his thoughts are occupied by Jungkook. Jimin's terrified that Jeon will roll everything back again, but at the same time, he wants to jump for joy.

What if Jungkook disappears again? If Park can't reach him or see him? Jimin thinks he'll just go crazy.

Jimin eats breakfast, nervously glancing at his phone and trying to suppress the storm of excitement raging inside him. He can't act like this, he can't be so dependent, but he's already ready to run to Jungkook's house and stand at the gate, waiting for him to appear. Jeon will come out, won't he? He won't hide abroad now, will he?

"How are you?" Park finally sends a message.

But there is no reply.

Damn it, he's not coming. It's all the same thing again!

Jimin feels like banging his head against the wall, but he just clenches his fists and lets out a long groan, pressing his forehead against the countertop.

"Jungkook, you can't ignore me again! Don't do this to me!" Park sends a second message. Great, Jimin is slowly but surely turning into an obsessed fan! It's not far from becoming a stalker.

"Let's talk. Min Yoongi isn't home anyway. Come over," he sends another message half an hour later.

"Just to talk," another ten minutes later.

"Please," five minutes later.

"Damn it, Jungkook, go to hell! Don't come to me anymore!"

This time, Jimin has no intention of tormenting himself. No intention of getting sick, not eating, and constantly worrying. Enough already! Enough!

He punches the kitchen counter, squeezes his eyes shut, and starts whimpering. Damned life! It torments him as it pleases! Why did it have to give him memories he can never get out of his head, and take Jungkook away? Why? What did he ever do?!

The doorbell makes Jimin abruptly lift his head from the table and look toward the entrance. His heart immediately starts racing, and his hands sweat. Min Yoongi would have just come in… Jimin doesn't think he ordered any delivery…

Park warily stands up and quickly tiptoes across the apartment, then excitedly peers through the peephole. Jungkook. It feels like a huge weight is lifted from his soul.

Jimin opens the door and lets in someone who is no longer just a friend. He puts on an annoyed expression, planning to give the jerk a scolding, but it immediately changes as soon as he notices Jungkook holding drink cups and a box of cupcakes.

"I thought it'd be impolite to come empty-handed," Kook smiles somewhat childishly and takes off his shoes, handing the things to Jimin.

"Didn't they teach you to reply to messages?"

"Yeah, sorry…"

"Oh, just shove your apologies…" Park interrupts sternly, but Jungkook skillfully shuts him up with a kiss. Jimin doesn't move, drowning in this light touch and feeling warmth spreading throughout his body.

"Hi," Jungkook smiles charmingly.

"Hi," Jimin drawls, giving in and practically melting from Jeon's behavior. Can he just hug him and never let go?

Park puts the food and drinks on the counter, and Jungkook takes off his outerwear. They move to the sofa, which already holds enough memories as it is.

"Sorry I didn't reply," Jungkook begins, and Jimin remembers that terribly unpleasant feeling he had in the morning.

"Don't do that, Jungkook. Just tell me everything you think and feel. Don't be afraid to hurt me."

"I don't want to run away anymore," Jungkook admits, and Jimin moves closer, touching his hand. "I know I acted like a jerk. I know. But I… was scared, Jimin. Because I understood that what's happening between us is serious, that it won't be a short-lived experimental phase. Accepting these feelings meant diving headfirst into them. Finally becoming someone who many aren't even ready to respect."

"You mean, become yourself?" Jimin says empathetically, taking Jeon's hand. "That's not really a choice, Jungkook. Is living in denial your whole life a good option? Lying to yourself… I wouldn't wish that on my worst enemy."

"You're right. But I had to make sure I couldn't do otherwise. Do you understand?"

"You mean with Soyeon?"

"Her too. I tried my hardest to be normal, but I couldn't… I still couldn't stop thinking about you."

"You are normal, Jungkook," Park insists. "To be perfectly honest, I'm attracted to girls too. But I don't want to give up what's between us. No matter what a jerk you can be sometimes."

Jungkook and Jimin smile, and Jeon gently fixes Park's hair.

"But I never liked girls. And I always knew it. Always knew deep down, but lied to myself until the last moment. Even Grandfather won't accept me…" Jungkook frowns sadly, making Jimin pull him close and kiss his cheek.

"If he loves you, he'll accept you. And if he doesn't, there's definitely room for one more roommate in this apartment," Jimin adds jokingly, and Jungkook smiles.

"He'll have to come to terms with it, because I can't give you up." Jungkook reaches for Jimin and freezes for a few seconds, looking into his eyes with stunning love. Jimin's breath catches.

"Jungkook…" he says seriously but with poorly hidden excitement. He can't stay silent any longer. "I love you."

The smile that lights up Kook's face makes something inside Jimin flutter. Then Jungkook kisses him again. So sweetly that the world around them dissolves and only they remain. Their breathing quickens again, their hands freely explore each other's bodies, and their clothes finally end up where they belong—on the floor.

This time, no one is embarrassed, and no one is in a hurry. They love each other slowly, making up for months of unfulfilled desires and creating magical memories.

"You know, I've never slept with anyone before, so I might not be very good," Jungkook says, lowering his gaze, to which Jimin just kisses his cheek.

"You did great yesterday," he smiles slyly, blushing. "And me too… I haven't had partners before either."

"Really?" Jungkook asks on an exhale, and Jimin sees that this pleases Jeon. To be honest, it pleases him too that they are each other's first. There's something special about it, as if they belong only to each other.

God, let it be like this forever.