Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

Dad watched the stage as the opening music played, keeping his eyes on the small boy holding the microphone nervously in the center. John's face brightened instantly as they met eyes, and Dad waved encouragingly. John smiled toothily, nodding slightly, and closed his eyes as he sung the first verse of the song right on cue.

I could stay awake just to hear you breathing
Watch you smile while you are sleeping
While you're far away and dreaming
I could spend my life in this sweet surrender
I could stay lost in this moment forever
Very moment spent with you is a moment I treasure

Dad felt his heart swell with warmth; other children John's age wouldn't normally choose a song like this, but John was brave enough to go with it anyway. Dad did the only thing he could do that could possibly express his pride: he took off his hat and held it to his chest.

I Don't wanna close my eyes
I don't wanna fall asleep
'Cause I'd miss you, baby
And I don't wanna miss a thing

'Cause even when I dream of you
The sweetest dream would never do
I'd still miss you, baby
And I don't wanna miss a thing

John's eyes were still closed, and he was swaying slightly side to side. Good, that means he's not as nervous anymore. Dad didn't understand why he thought he had a reason to be nervous. It might just be the fact that he's his father, but he thinks John has a wonderful voice.

Lying close to you feeling your heart beating
And I'm wondering what you're dreaming,
Wondering if it's me you're seeing
Then I kiss your eyes and thank God we're together
And I just wanna stay with you
In this moment forever, forever and ever

No, it's definitely not just because he's his father. John has an extremely pleasing voice, especially for someone for his age and experience level.

I don't wanna close my eyes
I don't wanna fall asleep
'Cause I'd miss you, baby
And I don't wanna miss a thing

'Cause even when I dream of you
The sweetest dream would never do
I'd still miss you, baby
And I don't wanna miss a thing

Dad feels a prickle of uncharacteristic irritation as a few of the older children start to whisper to each other. He settles for shush-ing them quietly, quickly enough so he can go back to listening to his son.

I don't wanna miss one smile
I don't wanna miss one kiss
Well, I just wanna be with you
Right here with you, just like this

I just wanna hold you close
I feel your heart so close to mine
And just stay here in this moment
For the rest of time, yeah, yeah, yeah!

John opens his eyes then, and the first thing he looks at is Dad, which makes him feel incredibly happy. John had decided to forgo his glasses while on stage, saying that he didn't want the glare to distract anybody or hurt their eyes. Dad doesn't know how he managed to raise such a considerate child.

I Don't wanna close my eyes
Don't wanna fall asleep
'Cause I'd miss you, baby
And I don't wanna miss a thing

'Cause even when I dream of you
The sweetest dream would never do
I'd still miss you, baby
And I don't wanna miss a thing

John starts making hand movements to go with his lyrics, which catches Dad by surprise. He hadn't realized that John was planning on doing this as well! Really, he can be so creative when he wants to be. Dad can't help but smile; not like he'd try not to, in any case.

I don't wanna close my eyes
I don't wanna fall asleep
'Cause I'd miss you, baby
And I don't wanna miss a thing

John belts the last few verses out, closing his eyes in concentration as he brings a fisted hand up to the mic.

'Cause even when I dream of you
The sweetest dream would never do
and I'd still miss you, baby
And I don't wanna miss a thing

Don't wanna close my eyes
I don't wanna fall asleep, yeah
I don't wanna miss a thing
I don't wanna miss a thing

Dad makes sure that he claps the hardest.

///

John bounced in excitement in the back stage while he waited for the rest of the performers to finish up their acts. He was so excited! Even though his part is already over. That doesn't mean he can't still be excited! Dad had even had his hat off! There were only two times when Dad had taken it off in front of John: The first was when John had made his first cake all by his self, and the second was when he'd composed his first piano song. So this must mean Dad is really, really, reeaaaally proud of him.

Oh my gosh.

When everyone is finished and they're all allowed to go out with the rest of the crowd, John makes a beeline to where he saw Dad was sitting. His hat is already back on, which makes him easy to identify, especially because Dad is really tall! John jumps into Dad's open arms, not really caring if anyone sees. They're all stupid for thinking that he's a baby just because he likes to hug his dad, anyway.

“I'm proud of you, son,” Dad says, in his usual deep baritone, and he gives John a crinkled smile. John smiles back as Dad exits out the doors of the cafeteria, into the cool night air.

“Really?” John asks, because he has to make sure.

“Really,” Dad chuckles.

“Hey, Daddy?”

“Yes?”

John waits until Dad has buckled him into the backseat to finish answering his question, and Dad waits inside the open door.

“Why were some kids holding their ears? Did their heads hurt?”

“Hush, son,” Dad says, ruffling his hair before closing the door and going to the drivers seat. “How would you like some ice-cream to celebrate your spectacular performance?”

“Yes!” John says, fist-pumping the air. Dad chuckles, and John stares at the lights blurring by the window as they drive, resting his chin on his hand.

Chapter Text

John rests his hand on his chin, eyes looking at the bright computer screen but his mind somewhere else. There's really nothing else for him to do right now. Jade and Davesprite are probably off on one of the planets doing something John would really rather not think about because ew, sister.

John makes a face, bringing his attention back to the bright light in front of him in an otherwise dark room. There's still so much time left until they meet up with everybody on the meteor and he's already bored as balls, which is why he decided to go through as many files on his computer as he could, to see what stuff he might have forgotten about.

He doesn't really have much stuff on his computer to go through, though... The only thing left now would be the Music folder. Humming, John double-clicks the eighth-notes icon, and is met with a long list of names.

“Where to start...” John narrows his eyes at the list. Shrugging, he clicks on the “shuffle button” and spins around in his chair, waiting for the song to play.

John stops the chair suddenly, his face screwed up as he tries to place where he knows this song from. It's only the opening, but it sounds so familiar...

I Don't wanna close my eyes
I don't wanna fall asleep
'Cause I'd miss you, baby
And I don't wanna miss a thing

Oh! Yeah, he remembers this one! Smiling, John hums along with the words, half-remembered lyrics matching up with the music. There's something else, though. Something he knows he's forgetting, just on the tip of his tongue and the edge of his mind. Still humming, John frowns, trying to sort through the nostalgia the song gives him. When he was younger, maybe? Something about it reminds him of elementary school. Practicing in the mirror... Singing on a stage...

John's eyes widen, and he smiles, using his windy powers to get the chair spinning again. He'd totally forgotten about that! Third grade, he had loved this song so much he'd decided to sing it for the talent show. He remembers being nervous, bright lights. He hadn't thought he'd done very well, he was aware even then that he wasn't the best singer, but Dad had complimented him and said he was proud like he always did and they'd gone out for ice-cream. If he tried, John could still taste the marshmallows from the Rocky Road lingering in the back of his throat.

“I'm proud of you, son,” Dad had said, smiling at him from across a white table in the small ice-cream shop. “It was very brave of you to go up and sing like that.” John remembered swinging his legs back and forth, still short enough that he couldn't quite reach the floor yet. He remembers asking Dad then, why he always said that. Said he was proud.

“Because I am,” Dad said, smiling softly from underneath the fedora that John had begun to suspect was a universal constant. “As long as you do what you think is right and try to be the best person you can, I'll always be proud of you, until the day I die.” Oh.

Yeah. That.

John closed his eyes, gripping the arm of the chair as he felt his throat constrict, and shakily began to sing.

I Don't wanna close my eyes
I don't wanna fall asleep
'Cause I'd miss you, baby
And I don't wanna miss a thing

Chapter Text

John hums quietly to himself, the early-morning sun filtering through the kitchen windows. He smiles widely as he prepares the finishing touches – adjust the bacon strips just a little this way here, the napkin could probably go under the plate a little more, and wow he almost forgot the most important part!

Reaching over the counter, John plucks a single red rose from it's wrappings, laying it down decoratively around the plate. His low humming suddenly goes up in pitch as an intense excitement squeezes his chest, in a way that was both manly as fuck and will never be talked about again.

Well. A slight slippage of mangrit is allowed. Today is a very special day, after all.

After one last satisfied look-over, John veeerry carefully snatches up the tray, and begins to walk to his room. He opens the slightly-ajar door with his foot, and the whole room opens up before him. The sight of the bundled up blankets on the bed gives a familiar fond squeeze to his heart. He pads slowly closer until he reaches the opposite side of the bed, and then sits down.

Now for the plan of attack.

“Karkat,” whispered. Not even a grumble. Maybe with a bit of prodding?

Okay, there was definitely a “fuck you” in there somewhere, getting close now. But how to go about it without getting his face clawed off...

An idea comes to him, sudden and perfect. If this doesn't do the trick, he doesn't know what will!

“I could stay awake, just to hear you breathin',” John sing-whispers, smiling slightly. “Watch you smile while you are sleepin', while you're far away and dreamin'.” Aha, sweet success! Karkat groans, and shifts enough so that John can just catch the gleam of a glaring yellow eye.

“First of all,” Karkat slurs, his voice thick with sleep, “That is a really fucking creepy thing to say. Second, what time even is it, anybody in their right mind would be unconscious as of this very moment, which you obviously are not and I have no idea why I am even humoring you. And most importantly, what the fuck are you doing, idiot?” Even still half-dead to the world, Karkat still has the will to rant. John find it obscenely adorable and he does not care.

“Well, it's our first anniversary-” John is suddenly struck with the idea that trolls might not even celebrate things like that, wow why did it take so long for that thought to even cross his mind, and his voice wavers as he continues on with his sentence. “-And I, uh. Made you breakfast?”

Karkat rolls his eyes. In the past year of their relationship John has educated himself on all of the innumerable meanings each specific Karkat Eye Roll can imply, but John is really Not That Great at interpreting all the subtleties in body language necessary for decent translations, so he's not exactly sure what's implied.

“I knew that, you stupid fuck. I meant what were you doing to wake me up.” Oh. Ha ha. John feels really stupid now. Although still slightly confused?

“Uh, singing?”

“John,” Karkat says, sitting up slightly in his huge nest of blankets. “Do you know what I would really like as an anniversary present?”

“What?” John asks. Finally, a chance to get him something he'll like!

“You to never sing again. Ever. Just stop.” Karkat flops back down again, rolling over and pulling a pillow over his head. Laughing, John places the tray on the nightstand, and crawls back into the bed. The blankets are still nice and toasty, heated by Karkat's warmth.

“Aw Karkat, I thought I was doing really good, you hurt my feelings!” Karkat doesn't respond, which has John a little worried. Just a tiny bit! Usually he would say something like “are your aurical sponges damaged or are you really stupid enough to think that that oinkbeast squealing would actually pass for something resembling music?” or whatever metaphor he could come up with. But he's not.

Oh no. Did he really make him mad when he woke Karkat up?

“Karkat?”

“You can keep going.” Karkat says abruptly, gruffly, but it quickly gives way to awkwardness. “If you want.”

He wasn't kidding.

So. Fucking. Adorable.

Smiling, John scootches in closer, swinging an arm over Karkat's side. Ha, no escape now!

When Karkat loops their fingers together, it almost makes John's heart explode into stars. The words come easy, when he calls them.

“Lying close to you feeling your heart beatin'. And I'm wondering what you're dreaming, wondering if it's me you're seein'. Then I kiss your eyes and thank God we're together. And I just wanna stay with you, in this moment forever, forever and ever.”