Chapter Text
[ He said to lose my life, or lose my love:
That's the nightmare I've been running from. ]
“Villains Decrypt, Frostbite, Geyser and Himiko Toga of the league of villains are on the move, spotted in south Tokyo, near the Corellian Trade Shopping Center, and are considered armed and dangerous; if spotted, do not approach: do your part and let a hero know-”
“We aren’t -”
“Well, me and Toga are.” You cut ‘Decrypt’ off, twisting a wire between your teeth, trying desperately to straighten up the copper sticking out before tossing it to the blonde. She looked upset, but you weren’t entirely sure if it was because the wire was still a little crooked, or if it was because it was covered in your saliva. She jammed it against the other wire anyway, and picked up the blue lighter already by her side, melding the pieces together with a plastic shrink.
“Will it-”
“Yes but I need time. Himiko, if you could-?” Toga was already halfway out the window of the passenger seat, and in her hand-
“No no no, not the bazooka!” You and the woman in the driver’s seat were thinking the same thing, but she was faster at chiding Toga. The other blonde popped her head and the huge gun back into the van, pouting and blowing hair out of her mouth.
“C’mon, why?!”
“We aren’t trying to kill them! Just-”
You let the conversation fade in the background, staring at the phone between your hands, your hands that had dried blood, scrapes, and bruises covering them; the message on the screen still sent a warm, fuzzy feeling through you. You pressed the screen on your face, trying to feel warmth, trying to recall how you’d gotten into this situation in the first place.
And trying to recall when you’d gotten so lackadaisical about things like this. Had you always been, had everything else just been the ‘before’, the ‘prologue’, the ‘precursor’ before you’d realized it, or had it happened so gradually you hadn’t noticed? Had your conscience totally packed it’s bags and waved 'sayonara!', taking a trip and never coming back?
You supposed it didn’t really matter. You had several cop cars trailing to worry about.
You leaned forward, hand feeling for something in the duffel bag before finding it and holding it out.
“Hey, Himi, I have a grenade!”
She cheered.
FOUR MONTHS PRIOR
Tenko Shimura was having a shitty day. No- that was an exaggeration, maybe, but at the moment, he couldn’t think of a milder way of putting it. This stupid thing had dissolved into pure chaos by now, having gone on way longer than expected. This was supposed to be a two hour event- here and then right back home. Hell, how was he supposed to know the high schoolers nearby would be touring the campus on the same day?
“You can leave if you want,” His girlfriend offered. She was to his right, covered in powdery sugar, visibly sweating. It was too damn hot for October. (He might have also been sweating, but he refused to wear anything besides the black sweatshirt he’d pulled on this morning. He was prepared to suffer for The Aesthetic.) “This fundraiser wasn’t even supposed to go on this long, I won’t be more than twenty minutes…”
He saw her gaze drag across the sea of dead-eyed college students, ravenous for more sugar to go with their coffees, more fuel to keep them from dropping into a sleep-deprived stress coma.
“...Maybe thirty, but the director said volunteers can leave early.” She leaned over, whispering in a conspiratorial voice, “Get out while you can, save yourself.”
“I’m not leaving you to fend for yourself.” He said, firmly planting himself behind the booth. Truth be told, he wanted to go home; but this was for the sake of fundraising for better equipment in the science labs at his girlfriend’s university, and her being a med student meant she’d be in those labs sometimes; why the damn school couldn’t just shell out some of their own money for it was a mystery (and as much as tuition was...there shouldn’t have been any reason the director of the labs had to do something like this. If you’d asked Tenko, it was because the universe was conspiring to make him suffer; if you’d asked his girlfriend, she would’ve said it’s because the school was greedy. Both were probably true to some degree.).
“We can manage. Go.” She said it with a very pointed look, and he wondered if his agitation had begun to show on his face at some point, or if she’d suddenly developed a mind-reading quirk to hear his thoughts about decaying a few dozen of these morons so they could go home already.
“You’ll be home-”
“-Right after my afternoon class. Promise.”
“Fine.” He bumped the back of his gloved hand on hers; he wasn’t one for PDA, but it was their little way of saying ‘I love you’ in public.
If your day wasn’t going great, it had been amusing, at the very least. You hadn’t expected Tenko to actually get involved in your university life at all, but he might’ve been going stir-crazy alone at the apartment everyday while you attended classes.
He’d actually taken time out of his day to help you sell donuts of all things; it was so surprisingly domestic, so normal it had shocked you. There were crowds, of course, college kids loved sweets, and your hands were already sore from kneading dough all morning; but Tenko was doing worse than you.
You appreciated his earnest effort, but you could see his faked smiles tightening out of the corner of your eye. He was good at pretending to be a people’s person for short periods of time, and could blend in fantastically, but the longer it went on the more concerned you got.
And after he left, the director of the event excused you too for your last class of the day. It was a general introduction into pediatric basics. You weren’t aiming to be a pediatrician, but it was required to get full credits; it was intentional on your part to push it to the end of the day. You could pay half-attention to it and finish homework for your more important classes.
That had been your intentions, at least. The professor was...ignorant, at best, or downright discriminatory against mutant-type quirks at worst.
“Sir,” And it was all you could do to keep from pinching the bridge of your nose, “You don’t really believe that, do you?”
It was a small enough class that you could feel the attention on you, but for once you didn’t mind. This was something most people in the room could agree on. Right?
“I do; people shouldn’t reproduce if they’re aware their own quirks are dangerous, or could potentially make a dangerous offspring. That’s just dooming a child to a life of villainy-”
“Dangerous quirks don’t make villains!”
“Please don’t shout in my class. We’re not having an ethics debate, this is a place of science and facts. And the statistics don’t lie. People with destructive quirks are more likely to turn to villainy than the rest of the population.”
“I kinda agree with the prof. I mean, if you knew your kid would probably be a villain or something, it’s better if they aren’t born.” A student chimed in. You could feel your face flushing red. “Just adopt, right?”
“Yeah..same. You came over from Japan, right? So you’ve seen villains over there running wild since All Might retired..Look what that ’All For One’ guy did to All Might! I don’t think villains should just be thrown in jails like that, honestly. It’s scary. Why don’t they just put them down?” Another student sighed.
“Sure, that guy sucks, but I’m sure..I mean, some of them are products of society -”
“We all get the quirk talk when we’re kids. If they wanna hurt people, it’s their own faults.” A girl near you sneered. “What, you aren’t a villain sympathizer, are you? Heroes are out there risking their lives, while those freaks-”
A lump formed in your throat and your eyes stung.
Freaks.
And now they were looking at you with cynical, cruel, nervous gazes, looks that anyone considered a villain must have seen dozens of times. Maybe their whole life, depending on their quirk. Even people who weren't villains, really, if their quirk deviated too much-
You grabbed your bag. “Sorry for derailing your lesson, sir.” You shot a look to the professor.
You had already made up your mind to drop the class immediately. You had only been in America for a month, roughly, and all the panic about moving into a new country hadn’t stressed you out as much as this class alone.
You ignored the eyes on you, and the whispering; you could handle people talking about you , but anytime the topic of villains came up, you couldn’t seem to keep quiet.
The apartment the school provided was a short walk away from the sprawling campus, and the walk back was nice for clearing your head. The sun was dipping down, lighting up the sky with oranges and pinks, and you counted backwards from a hundred until you felt like you could breathe again.
It had been harder to make friends now; it used to be so easy, because you had the privilege of being able to ignore those types of debates- you had no stakes in them, before. In Japan, you had plenty of classmates to get along with, to go out with on the weekends, to study with, but now...
You hadn’t always thought like this; you couldn’t blame your classmates if they’d never been exposed to the reality of how villains were born, because you’d been just like them at some point. You shook the thought away. Dwelling on those thoughts made your heart hurt too much. It made you doubt yourself. Because as much as throwing away your normal life scared you, some people didn't have that option at all, did they?
Clouds were rolling in as you climbed up the porch’s steps, and you wondered if it would rain tonight.
You were not a villain.
That’s what you used to tell yourself, at the beginning. You’d had good intentions! You were going to med school to help people, you had let the leader of the League of Villains into your life with good intentions, too. You’d been trying to help him, even after that first night, after you knew who he was. Because no one else seemed to want to; because the League was full of underdogs ( villains -), and someone had to help them not die. If it was out of love and good intentions, it couldn’t be wrong! (At some point you’d realized you sounded like an echo of Toga- but was she so wrong? Maybe you didn't agree with all of her methods. But.)
In the past, the lines had been clear cut: Villains were bad, they killed and hurt innocents and heroes. Heroes were good, they helped and protected the innocent. But sometime between drunken laughter at a festival, awkward hotel bed sharing, a heartfelt confession, and him saving your life, the lines blurred. You hadn't reported him at any point. You had made that choice. Villain stopped being a dirty word; they were products of the society that was constantly shoving them down and expecting them to be alright with that.
They were people who were once innocent, abused to the breaking point for something they couldn’t have helped being born with, then punished for trying to even the odds or bring awareness to how messed up it all was!
And it was! Horrible, awful, disgusting, the way society looked at people with ‘bad’ quirks! It had dawned on you a hundred times before; between ‘I love you’s’, in arguments like the one from class, and now. This still-balmy night in early October; you and your boyfriend were in bed, listening to the rain outside. He was half asleep, a DS in his hand providing the only light in the room, save for the occasional flash of lightning. You were on your side, tracing patterns on his back with your finger, humming a tune you’d forgotten the name of. He still smelled faintly like powdered sugar from earlier, lavender shampoo and ash.
You had realized it in totality when you brushed your lips on his neck and felt his scars against your kiss.
You weren’t a villain, not really , but you were rooting for them; you’d always been rooting for what Tenko wanted. He’d left behind everything he’d ever known in Japan to follow you here and had called it selfishness, but his goal had originally been to change the world. He’d certainly changed yours, but what about everyone else?
Children with ‘ugly’ quirks, that adults in a clinical classroom setting, supposedly smart people , agreeing that those children would be better off dead? Scared, confused people with nowhere to go because no one would have them for work because of how they looked or acted? What about the people with no direction, no one to help them?
Heroes even marked people like that as villains. Heroes were supposed to help. That night you met him, if you wouldn’t have done anything, heroes surely would’ve let your boyfriend die in that alley.
Your eyelashes had grown wet, and he’d looked up at you with a start when he felt them drip down his neck. When you looked into his ruby red eyes, you tangled your fingers into his hair and kissed silent promises on his lips.
“What are you even crying over?” Tenko’s voice was exasperated when he pulled away, but his eyes held concern. He wrapped his hands around you carefully, and you laid your head on his chest, listening to his heartbeat, listening to the rain that you'd been expecting all day.
“What do you want?”
“Wh- I was just trying to ask you why you were getting snot all over me-”
“No, I wasn’t being rude, I’m being serious! What do you want? Do you still want to destroy society? You’ve been thinking about it, haven't you?”
He was quiet for a moment. Then, he snorted.
“Did the bake sale go that bad that you wanna see them all die?” His tone shifted after that. “I guess you have been thinking about too, huh? Well,” He paused again, and the only sound was rain. “We’ve been here for a month, I’ll be honest. When I decided to come with you over here, it wasn’t purely out of love or anything like that. A lot of it was spite. I didn’t want anything from that bastard or to do anything he’d want, but…”
“But?”
You could hear him exhale; his fingers tightened on your waist.
“He did give me the resources to do whatever I wanted; I can’t just forget what everyone else did. All the people who just passed by. And there’s a lot that’s too vague from the past...I feel like I’m in some kind of limbo here…I’m still trying to make up my mind. I know you don’t want me to get hurt from ‘villainous activities’, but...”
It was your turn to sigh. “At school today we were doing a rundown of pediatric basics. The professor was talking about how different quirks affect kids as they first form. It’s been on my mind for a while...but it was like a wake up call or something. The way the professor and the other students were talking about kids with dangerous quirks..they’re kids! No one can help what they’re born with!”
“People suck, huh? Is that it? I already knew that; You think I can change that?”
“I think you can do anything you want to. I’ve seen how restless you’ve been this past month. It’s hard to be a civilian for you, right? No offense, but I don’t think you’d come to a uni bake sale unless you were super bored.”
“I have been feeling stagnant.” He admitted. “And I’ve been thinking about the league. I haven’t seen them on the news at all.”
“You have that phone, don’t you? You could call them.” He glanced at you with narrowed eyes, and you raised your hands. “Sorry, I didn’t mean to snoop! You only brought one box so I was curious.”
It was a single brown box under the bed; one day while he was sleeping you’d pulled it out, being careful with the contents. It was his old villain things, complete with the long jacket and the hands (which felt oddly leathery under your touch, but you’d never gotten around to asking him what they were made of.) and a single, old looking flip phone with a few nameless numbers listed. That box and Aloe had been all he’d brought.
“I don’t care about that. If I call them, we’ll be traced and this whole thing would have been for nothing.”
You thought about it; then you smiled. “The whole idea of me leaving was to get away from the Japanese police’s attention; and you said you left on equal parts love and spite, but none of that spite was towards them. I know they won’t hurt me. I can’t stand the thought of you being lonely.”
“I have you.” He murmured stubbornly.
“Sure, but friends are nice, too.” And important parts of recovery; you kept that to yourself. You couldn’t let him isolate himself too much. Not with this much progress; you’d do everything you could to keep him from backsliding.
“I don’t think they’d want to follow me anywhere. I left them.” His voice got low. “We came together because we only wanted to destroy. I can’t even say that’s true anymore. You showed me there’s things..that aren’t so bad. But then, there are things worse than anything you can imagine. You asked what I want to do, but what do I do if even I don’t know the answer to that?”
“I don’t know.”
“‘I don’t know’, she says too.”
You snorted. “I do know people change; and so do their goals. Your league loved you.” He opened his mouth, but you shook your head. “They did. And you did leave them without saying goodbye. I’m not saying that was the wrong call, but I can see you’re going stir-crazy, and I can see you’re concerned about them; you wouldn’t be looking for them on the news otherwise, right? And I don’t think they only want to destroy either; there must be some things they like.”
“I feel like they all want an easier life. ...And some of them just want to stab.”
“...Ignoring the stabbing part for a minute, do you want to let them find that easier life on their own, or do you want to help them? If you think seeing them again will put you in a bad state of mind-”
“You’re enough.”
“I’m…” You blinked slowly, wiping at your nose and sniffling a little. “ What? You..you can have them and me. I’d never make you choose, you know that, right? I would’ve have even asked you to come here if you- I mean, it’s sweet of you to say, but- y’know I still text and call Tojiki and Mika and my family, right?”
“In theory that’s right, but it’s different for you.”
“How?”
“Because you- you don’t have a centuries old villain visiting you in your nightmares swearing to kill everyone you love. I can’t tell what’s a nightmare and what’s real half the time, and I’m already regretting coming. It’s putting you in danger.”
“Y’know in the movies, how the hero immediately leaves their loved one, giving the bad guy the chance to kidnap them as soon as they leave? You aren’t doing that. ”
“Obviously not ; I’m not a hero, and I’m too selfish to really want to leave you; running from problems is too much of a hassle- it might have been good to take a break short-term, still…” He looked at you, and leaned forward, kissing your lips lightly. “I wanna hear your thoughts about it.”
“About what?” You asked, a little dazed; if this was a cartoon, you’d have little hearts floating above your head for sure. Kissing was a quick distraction and he knew how easily you got flustered!
“You want me to kill your professor by decay, or something more old-fashioned, like a stabbing or-”
“Tenko!”
You giggled, and the conversation was steered away for the moment. But you didn’t forget it, and it lingered in the back of your mind.
Aloe was kept in a tank in the kitchen. You ordered take-out more than you cooked with your schedule, so the tank sat on the kitchen's island. You were getting a midnight snack- well, 3 AM snack, who was counting? And you figured Aloe might want one, too, but... the food can was empty. As it happened, both you and Tenko were up. (Maybe you had developed bad sleeping habits, maybe they'd always been this bad, but he was enabling you for sure!)
“Hey, Tenko! You said you got more food for Aloe before even coming to America; where’d you put it?” He was in the shower, water full-blast. The room was fogged up and near-suffocating from the heat, but you’d bear it; your baby was hungry! ...And you didn’t wanna run to the store at 3 AM for jellyfish food. You’d probably have to order it online if he didn’t have any here, actually. You'd never seen jellyfish feed in the pet section of the nearby grocery store. Their fish section was already embarrassingly small compared to their cats and dogs section-
“...I think I left it in my jacket.”
“Your jacket? Which one?”
“The jacket. In the box.”
Oh. Oh!! His villain jacket! In the box under the bed! You had never told him, but you adored that thing; he looked so cool in it!
“Can I get it?”
“Knock yourself out.”
You were almost giddy pulling the box out. The first thing was his old black jacket, crumpled up in a ball. You huffed- you had hangers, it was all wrinkly and stained with blood judging by the smell. Would he be mad if you washed it, and the next time he put it on, he smelled like lavender? ...You were gonna wash it.
After you yanked that out, but before you could check the pockets, there was the pile of hands, and your curiosity got the better of you. You wondered about them; of course they were kinda iconic, but you’d never asked; it had just never came up. You wondered where he got them; were they custom made? You didn’t see any velcro or straps, or anything to hold them on.
“Hey, how do you keep the hands on?” You shouted to the bathroom that was adjacent to the bedroom.
“What?” Came a muffled reply.
“ The hands? How do you keep them on?”
You turned one over. It felt a little cold and firm, and was almost greenish in color. Surprisingly detailed up close, veins sticking out, the fingernails even had cuticles! The fingerprints all looked unique, too!
…
“These aren’t really real human hands are they?” Your voice rose at the end. “Hey, Tenko ?!”
“What did you think they were?” He came out of the bathroom in a towel. You squeaked, dropping the hand back into the box. There was a pair of small black boxes under the pile of human hands that you'd never noticed, but no way you were reaching around to find out what that was, noooo, no thank you. You’d seen enough. “Did you think we picked them up at a Halloween store?”
“I mean? Kinda?! I thought they were like..custom made or something!! Who’s hands are these?!”
“Well, should I go over every single one of them or…”
“Yes!!”
He stared at you for a minute, then shook his head.
“Nah. You’re already freaked out. I don’t want you to…” He trailed off, and you saw his hand creeping towards his neck.
“What? Okay, no, stop that. I wasn’t upset at you, I just. This is a normal person reaction to severed hands, okay? You wouldn’t do this anymore, right?”
“Depends,” he saw the look you gave him and he smiled. “I didn’t embalm them myself, relax. I just killed them. Can’t promise I won’t kill anyone, some people just suck too much-”
“Okay,” you said, because quite frankly you were stunned and couldn’t think of anything better to say, anything that would make him feel any better. Because he was avoiding your gaze, and thought he was smiling, his shoulders were all drawn up and tense, and you didn’t want this to turn into a Thing.
More than it already was.
“If you don’t want to talk about it it’s fine; hey, who am I to judge? Maybe they had it coming!”
He abruptly let out a surprised laugh. “Some may have,” he agreed. “Maybe, but not all of them.”
He sat beside you on the floor. “It honestly gets too fuzzy to even talk about.”
He picked up one of the hands, and turned it over. You weren’t looking at the hands anymore, but his face. His lips were drawn too tightly, his eyes narrowed. He met your eye and let out another small laugh.
“Why are you looking at me like that?”
“I’m not looking at you like anything,” You folded your knees up, resting your chin on them. “Sorry if I drudged up bad memories.”
“Like I said. It gets too fuzzy...you said you had the ‘normal’ reaction to seeing these...was it disgust? That’s how I feel when I look at them, too. Like I’m going to throw up.”
“I mean, I guess it was more like shock.” You were kinda grossed out, but, “I was also concerned for you.”
“For me? I have both my hands.”
“Well, they’re dead, no use being concerned for them.”
“That’s true. But maybe my humor has been rubbing off on you.”
“I was being serious! I didn’t know whoever they were, but I know you!” You pouted. “So, are you okay?”
“I’m not frail, y’know. If you really wanted to know, they were my family.”
“What?” You looked at the hands. They were all the roughly same size. “Sorry- I don’t mean to sound insensitive, but did you have a family of all men?”
“I..” He squinted at them. “I don’t know what All For One and the doctor did. Some of them got completely destroyed so they probably had to replace them.” He sneered when he saw your expression, looking away. “This is why I didn’t want to tell you, I didn’t want to see that look.”
“What look? I’m not allowed to be concerned for you?”
“You’re allowed to feel however you want.”
“Oh my god,” You sighed. “No, we aren’t making this a Thing. Tell me what you’re thinking. Talk to me.”
He stood up, grabbing a wad of clothes from the dresser and walking into the bathroom. You stood and walked to the door, leaning against it.
“Please.”
“Mfmph.”
“I can’t hear you-”
“I don’t want you to be disgusted with me. When we first met, I was curious, then...I thought about killing you a lot.”
You processed that, but didn’t interrupt him.
“I loathed you, you made me feel sick because you were a comfort. Like them.”
He was likening you to dead, embalmed hands. Right.
Romantic.
(Honestly? In a Mary Shelly way, it kinda was. Gothic romance sci-fi novellas were totally great and all, but you had other things to worry about right now.)
“But my feelings towards you obviously changed. The disgust from your comfort...changed...But my feelings towards them..didn't.” Did he..feel guilty for not loving the hands?
“You said you can barely remember. That’s not your fault. And I love you, and I knew how much history you have. Sure, I didn’t know the details, but it’s a part of you. So I’m still here.”
“...Just like that?” He cracked the door open, face close to yours. He looked confused. Had he expected you to dump him over this or something...?
“Just like that. If...if you ever do want to talk about them, I’m here.”
“Maybe,” He agreed. “Maybe if I remember more. I just want to be here with you right now.”
You weren’t sure what to say to that; so you kissed his nose lightly. You were one person; you couldn’t completely ‘fix’ or ‘heal’ all of his trauma; you could see that distant look in his eyes sometimes, and it made your heart ache.
Was this living life to the fullest for him?
(Could you single-handedly- pun unintended- help him? You felt so incredibly out of your depth. The more you learned, the more you realized how little you really knew.)
(But you knew you loved him. And that was enough.)
(Also: you still didn't know how he kept the hands on.)
A day later, in the middle of doing dishes, your phone rang. It was requesting a video chat from an unknown number, and against your better judgement, you answered it.
The last person you expected to see was Spinner. It looked like Toga, Twice, and Dabi were lingering behind him. Tenko wasn't even home right now- he was at the laundromat. You weren't sure if that was a good or bad thing yet.
“I got your number with my awesome hacking skills!”
“We looked in the police records.” Dabi added from somewhere in the background. Spinner let out an indignant huff.
“I went in and looked through the records!” Toga chimed in. “I wanna talk-”
“Will you guys get out?”
“No. We all should-”
“I was sitting here first! I wanna talk to-”
You saw the screen blur and shake for a minute, got a glimpse of a green hand, and heard a slam. You could hear pounding on the door Spinner was leaning against, Toga’s muffled voice protesting from the other side.
“You can talk to her in a second, let me say what I gotta first!” He looked back at you with a sharp glare. “I’m just gonna say it! No one is happy you took Shigaraki away! We found out that one was a clone a while ago, and put the pieces together after Twice started crying! He-Shigaraki told us he’d make our dreams come true, and instead he’s settling for a normal life?! I can’t even believe it- he- he wouldn’t be happy like that-! Screw your white picket fences, you-”
“I think you’re right!” You blurted out.
“You- huh? You think I’m..right?”
“He’s miserable here! He misses you guys so much, and he’s still not happy with the way things are. I really didn’t...you don’t have to believe this but I really didn’t ask him to come. He was just working through a lot of stuff and decided to on his own.”
His brow was furrowed. “What kinda stuff? He couldn’t rely on us for whatever it was?”
“It’s complicated. Stuff about All For One, and stuff about family..he’s convinced something bad’ll happen; that All For One will punish him. I think he doesn’t want you guys caught up in the crossfire.”
“We aren’t the ones who get caught in crossfire, we’re the ones firing the shots! Anyway, if that’s true, why stick with you? It’s not like you have some crazy strong quirk- no offense! But won’t you…”
“Please keep this between us.” You sighed. “My theory is he expects to die or be killed by All For One, so he wants to spend his time before then..with me. Maybe because he missed out on a ‘normal life’ and I’m the closest thing to that. Not to say he doesn’t love me, but I can tell he’s forcing himself to be here.”
Spinner was quiet, and you tried not to let your voice crack too much.
“I just want him to be happy. I used to want him to be safe and happy, but you’re right; I don’t have a very impressive quirk, there’s no way I could fight All For One. If he can only be happy with you guys, then I-”
“He was miserable without you, too, y’know! When you guys first started hanging out and he was stuck at the base without you, he always moped around!” He ran a clawed hand through his hair. “You think we don’t want him to be happy or somethin’?”
“I would never think that! We all want him to be happy! I just- I don’t know what to do here! If he stays with me he’ll miss you guys, and if he goes with you all he might miss me-”
“Then just stay with him!”
You had thought of that, of course you had. Your deal with the police dictated that as long as you no longer involved yourself with villains, you wouldn’t go to jail for housing and tending to them— you knew if it had been any villain other than Shigaraki, someone All Might was vouching for, that wouldn’t have been the case. You would already be behind bars.
But you were already risking that living with him. Even if he wasn’t doing anything right now, no ‘villainous activities’ he was still a wanted criminal, and would likely serve life if he got caught— maybe even get the death penalty.
He was risking his life just existing; he might never be truly safe, even if All For One did somehow drop dead.
But the idea of going with the league, abandoning your safety net and normal life was petrifying. Even if that safe, comfortable life was an illusion now that you were actively still committing the crime of harboring a villain— again.
Even if he’d totally dropped his way of living to follow you, could you be that brave? With your quirk and no fighting skills? You hardly had any grand reason or strong ideals about it, you only felt strongly about making sure Tenko didn’t die. Could you even do that much with your skill set? Or would you wind up holding the league back? Or worse, getting them ki-
“I don’t have a great quirk either.” He mumbled. “So when I said that earlier, I meant..obviously none of us can stop that boss guy if he decides to do anything! At least not alone! But with all of us here…”
All of the pros you’d seen on TV in Kamino, and only All Might was able to stand up to the guy; and he was retired now, unable to fight. As optimistic as you stayed for Tenko, you honestly felt a little hopeless thinking about it.
So if defeating him was impossible, so what? If you were going to get killed and knew it, if there was a strong possibility Tenko would be too? How much did the future really matter? Maybe, you thought, it’d be better to fix what you could while you were alive.
You decided. Your own voice surprised you- it wasn’t shaking anymore, it came out strong and steady. “Hey, Spinner? I- I had an idea.”
“Eh? Wait, are you gonna actually come back?!”
“Not..exactly. I was honestly really afraid; of thinking about it, about the consequences, but some things are just inevitable, so why worry? There are some things we can't run from.” You smiled. “I only wish I realized that sooner.”
“You know you guys don’t have to book a flight--Kurogiri is here-! D’you want me to go get him?! I can, right now and-”
“I need to talk to him first, but..keep your phone by you, okay? It’s- it depends on you guys, and him, but...I'll talk to you guys soon.”
“O-Okay! Good luck! Um- thank you, too!”
You blinked.
“What for?”
“For supporting him, too!” Spinner looked embarrassed about something, and hung up on you.
Well; here went nothing.
You strode down to the public dorm laundromat in the basement, a firm grip on the metal handrail leading down.
“Tenko!”
He was sitting on a washer, legs crossed and DS in his hands. Luckily, it seemed like no one else was in here.
He looked up, repeating your name with the exact tone you’d used, then grinned.
“Hey. What’s going on, did you set the apartment on fire?”
“I- no!” You made your way over to him, placing your hands on either side of the washer, trapping him. He looked down at your hands, then back at your face, more amused than anything.
“Are you happy here?”
“What kind of question is that? You've been too sulky lately, asking me weird, psychological questions-”
“Are you?” You persisted. “I think you miss the league and that you may be lonely. All For One didn’t make them a team though, you brought them together! I’m not going to let you throw away your dreams just so I can have mine; actually, since I met you, mine’s changed!”
The amused look sobered; he uncrossed his legs and hung them off the side, forcing distance between the two of you. The artificial light was harsh, sending a shadow across his face. His bangs were longer, but they didn't quite hide his scowl.
“What makes you think I haven’t changed my ‘ dreams’ since I met you ? Maybe I want your idea of normal now. Maybe I don't regret anything.”
“My idea of normal has totally changed since I met you. And I don’t want to regret anything either.” You hesitated. “Were you just saying that, or did your dreams— your ideals.. did they really change because of me?”
“Do you really want to know?” You nodded. “After I met you, I was constantly annoyed because I kept thinking what you’d think about every little thing I did- I never used to second-guess killing people.” He winced. “I’ve always been a natural. Sensei said I was born like that. Ever since I was a kid, I didn’t hesitate, and I never felt remorse.”
You frowned. “I can’t believe that.”
“What? Why-”
“Because I know you!”
Your words got caught in your throat, but you forced them out.
"Your Sensei chose your path, sure, but didn't you tell me you chose your league? They aren't his; if it came down to him or you, they'd come to you in a heartbeat. They're your friends and I...I don't want you to feel like you had to choose between them or me." You admitted, letting your head droop. "You need friends- ones that get you. Me, I’m not..the league. They understood you in a way I don’t think I could, no matter how much I try, I can’t relate to everything you’ve been through, even if I sympathize and love you-"
"You left your friends in Japan," He pointed out under his breath. "What about you? That Tojiki boy, Mika, your family. You only took this transfer program to be not go to jail-"
"What do you want me to say?" You sighed. "No, I don't want to go to jail, they gave me a deal and I took it, we played the system because we made them believe you wanted to hurt me, we both did that- but I was always going to come back to you after this year, Tenko! You didn’t have to come with me if you-"
"I had to think. I didn't know where I wanted to stand with Sensei. I still don't; I hate him, but he's given me everything and maybe I was selfish to leave the league for that, but I love you, so I would've given it up-"
"Oh..oh Tenko, love doesn't have to be that. I don't want it to be choosing. I would've come back to you. I..you know I would've, right?" You placed a soft kiss on his temple, moving his hair behind his ear gently. "You came all this way for me and you've been so selfless doing that. And I know you've been confused, but I can tell what you want by how you've been acting. If you miss your league, that can't be helped. We can see them-"
"No. I'm not getting you involved again. Seeing you in that hospital bed, I can't. Not again. I'd rather live a terrible, boring civilian life forever than-"
"But you don't have to! You have things you want to do too, and it's not fair to just chase my goals and make you forget yours! What do you want to do? Knowing what you do now, what do you want?"
"I want you." His red eyes glared up at you and you could feel your cheeks flushing brightly. "And...I still want to put heroes in their place. I hate Sensei, but he wasn't wrong about everything. Heroes who left me to rot, heroes who make this society hell for me and people like my league."
"And I want to help you."
"What ?"
"I said, I want to help!" You pouted. "Seriously, since I've met you, my eyes opened to how messed up it all is. And I've always wanted to help people- the best way to do that is to be by your side, helping the people who are fighting for change, that the heroes won't help. Let me support you. Let me support the people who no one else will. We have the same goal."
"But if I go back to being a villain, he wins. I don't want anything from him."
"Then do it your own way. Not his. I know you can."
He let his hair hang in front of his face, but you could hear him scoff under his breath.
"What?"
"You're unbelievable, you know that? You're seriously saying I can have everything I want? Didn't you just say you couldn't let me give up my goals so you could get yours? Aren't you a hypocrite?"
"I just said I was going to help you guys, I've wanted to help people all along! I'm just changing up the way of doing it!"
"And how's a medical undergrad going to help us-?" You smacked him lightly on the shoulder, laughing.
"I'll make sure you don't get injured enough to even need me to patch you up!"
He wrapped his arms around your waist pulling you closer. You laughed into his shoulder, hugging him back.
"I thought about it for a while, the other day when you were being all noble and saying you felt bad for kids who have shitty quirks. And now you're saying it's because you love me and everything, but I have to wonder..." His lips brushed against your ear. You shivered, not daring to wiggle against his grasp. "Did you start to get a thrill out of worrying me, or getting caught up in villainy? You weren't secretly enjoying it every time I fought off bad guys for you, right? One person can only be so selfless, y'know? Or are you bored, too?"
"I..." You considered it. "Obviously..I don't wanna get myself in trouble. I can't exactly say I hate seeing your protective side come out, though."
"I was teasing you. I know you're a good person." He chuckled in your ear, then pulled away, like he hadn't just make your heart race right out of your chest. "I'm the luckiest man in the world. I've thought of something else I want, too. If you want me to get greedy."
"Oh. Well, please share." You grinned up at him, cuddling him close.
"Let's get married."
You paused, then laughed again. "I almost thought you were serious. Sure, let's get married. We should get a big cake. Flame broil it- no, no, invite the whole league and let Dabi flame broil it! And we can have it on a beach! I want a barefoot, casual wedding."
"Yeah. No shoes. I agree." He nodded. "I bet we could guilt trip All Might into paying for it. I really want a hand-shaped cake topper, too."
"Seriously, I thought the whole idea of eloping was to avoid a wedding. You're secretly a romantic, huh?"
"What can I say. Yes."
You burst out laughing at his deadpan tone, and it wasn't cute giggling anymore, but full on gasping for air.
"Wait wait, wait, you know how like at weddings, they have those..gift bags?"
"Do they? I've never been."
"Yeah, like..wait, maybe it's baby showers..or kids birthday parties...? Anyway, we rob a bank before the wedding, and the gift bags are just those.. you know..giant comical bags of money like you see in cartoons."
"Yeah." He nodded. "Have you been drinking?”
"I'm pretty sober." You disagreed, then brushed off the joke he'd made. Marriage had never been an option, considering you had to get paperwork for that kind of thing...it was sweet he'd humor you, though. Or, knowing he thought about that kind of thing anyway..it made your chest tighten up. “Anyway, I had an idea! How you can have the league and me, and shake up society how you want, and still avoid All For One.”
His eyes sparkled with a light you hadn't seen in a month, his lips spread into a smirk. You lost your train of thought for a second because wow- he was so handsome and you loved him so much.
“I can’t wait to hear this.”
You couldn’t hide your grin. You threw your hands out for emphasis, not even trying to contain your glee or volume anymore.
“Okay, so, here’s what we do!”