Chapter Text
James met Regulus in a juvenile detention center.
How did James Potter end up in juvie of all places? That was the question, wasn’t it.
James wasn’t like a lot of the other kids. He’d grown up with money, love, and two parents who didn’t do drugs, commit crimes, or lay a hand on anyone.
Or, he used to be, as he often had to remind himself. He wasn’t different than them anymore. But he was still a “good kid” as his social worker said. The good kid, excuse got him off with a slap to the wrist or community service the first few times. Enough offenses and the law didn’t see him that way anymore.
He stopped trying to stay the James Potter he was supposed to be and figured fuck it. If they thought he was a bad kid, James could be a bad kid.
“Morning, Nurse Diaz,” James smiled brightly as the nurse let herself into James’ room.
She just looked at him for a long moment like she was disappointed before shaking her head. “It’s not the morning, James.”
There were no windows in the room and James just glanced around the bare walls before shrugging. “How would I know?”
Diaz started messing around with medical supplies, sighing like he annoyed her. But James knew the truth was that she—and a most of the staff at Mayfield Juvenile Detention Center—had a soft spot for James.
“Can I get some stitches now?” James questioned, holding out his bandaged arm.
“Dr. Easter will be in shortly,” Diaz said. “You have a concussion, you’d think that might dampen your energy a little.”
“I cannot be dampened,” James said brightly.
Diaz raised her eyebrows in unamusement, holding out a small paper cup with two Tylenol.
“That’s it?” James asked but swallowed down the pills.
“You got your wish, best not complain,” Diaz reprimanded, but her voice wasn’t as sharp as it could have been.
“What wish?” James asked innocently. “It’s not my fault Brian caught me off guard.”
“After you picked a fight with him, I hear,” Diaz said suspiciously.
“Insulting someone is not a crime,” James huffed. “He just had the bad taste to respond to my insults with his fist and a very sharp object. You should probably look into that, actually. Very dangerous.”
“Lay down, James,” was all she said. He obeyed, only because his head did hurt a little bit.
James figured the makeshift blade had already been confiscated, and Diaz knew it, but she wasn’t really supposed to talk about those things with James.
She knew James’ game, they all did. It was something the counselor tried to bring up with James on more than one occasion.
“I must just be a magnet for trouble,” James had shrugged.
“Or,” the doctor said, a knowing look in her eye as she psychoanalyzed him. “You aren’t able to hurt yourself here, so you find other people to do it for you.” When she said that James wanted to trash her stupid desk with the stupid pictures of her dog.
Stop trying to cut into me and unravel my insides!
It made him sick.
James had, of course, left his session and gotten into a fight. Fuck Dr. Pomfrey and her warm eyes. James hated her and all her prying. He hated that in a different life, he’d probably like her. If he wasn’t here, in this position.
Diaz left James alone for a while, just staring at the ceiling. The plus of a concussion was that James got to stay here for at least a day while they made sure his brain wasn’t too fucked up. That meant no waking up at six a.m., no hungry eyes following him like prey, and no counseling. God bless.
Dr. Easter came in not long after to stitch up James’ arm. He wasn’t sure if he liked him more or less than his counselor. At least Easter never tried to get into James’ head. He just stitched him up and bid him goodnight.
Diaz came back in a little while later to make sure his concussion wasn’t about to kill him, and James let her do whatever she needed to do. Diaz was his favorite.
James had been in here often enough to know the routine, so he was surprised when it was broken by a cop pushing the door open. He had a kid in handcuffs by the shoulder.
A few years of not being the good kid he used to be, instantly had James stiffening at the cop’s appearance, but he paid James no mind.
“Who’s this?” James questioned.
Both Diaz and the cop ignored James as they got the kid into the bed on the other side of the room.
“Careful!” Diaz scolded, as the cop was a bit too rough with the boy and he coughed out a wheezing breath.
The officer just stood back, raising his hands in agitated defeat. “Fine,” he snapped. “You deal with the kid, he’s not my problem anymore. Just watch out, he likes to run.”
James wagered this kid wouldn’t be going anywhere now, as the police officer handcuffed the boy to the bed.
Diaz ignored James after that in favor of tending to the newcomer whom James could admit, probably needed it more than he did.
He had nothing better to do than crane his neck to watch. The boy seemed young, probably a year or two younger than James. He had dark hair and thin wrists that tugged at the handcuffs as if he might be able to escape them through sheer force. James doubted that, he seemed delicate, far too skinny to be strong enough.
At first, James secretly thought this kid wouldn’t survive a day in Mayfield. But when Dr. Easter came in, the boy looked up with such fury in his gaze, James tentatively decided to take that back. Enough desperation and sheer anger could get someone a lot of places.
One of those places happened to be juvie, James would know.
When Diaz and Dr. Easter left the two of them alone, James sat up, ignoring the way his head spun a little.
“Man, you look like you’ve been fucked up,” James remarked.
The boy stiffened. He didn’t look over at James. He didn’t move, aside from tugging at the handcuffs like he couldn’t stop himself.
There was a bandage covering his neck and ones wrapped up his hands and wrist. There was probably more under his clothes, that James couldn’t see.
James sighed when the kid didn’t respond. “Okay, you’re not a great conversationalist.”
Still, the other boy didn’t speak. His eyes stayed fixed on the ceiling like if he ignored James, maybe he’d go away.
“I’m not going anywhere,” James prodded. “Can’t, I’ve got a concussion you know. I told Brian Cox he should shove his tray up his ass and maybe that’d cure his homophobia. My mistake, I probably shouldn’t have. But the look on his face was worth getting hit and almost gutted.”
The room remained silent.
“And you’re not going anywhere either,” James continued because hearing his own voice was preferable to sitting in silence with the anger radiating off his new roommate. The boy froze at that, and James realized he’s struck a nerve. He was good at that.
“But watch out, he likes to run,” the cop had said.
“There’s no way out of here unless you’re released. And it’s boring if you try. Vaughn tried a few months ago and they locked down the entire place. It was stupid, we were all stuck in our cells. Vaughn isn’t even in my pod and we couldn’t leave either. Everyone was pissed at him after for ruining things for everyone, he got beaten up pretty bad. Not worth it,” James mused. “You wouldn’t get very far, Diaz will be in and out all night, plus there are guards and Kinley who watches the cameras this time of night is terrible. He actually does his job instead of falling asleep at his desk like night shift is supposed to. Not to mention those handcuffs,” James gestured to the metal around the boy’s wrist. “No offense, but I don’t think you’re getting out of those with your strength.”
Finally, the boy looked James’ way. As their eyes met James almost wanted to look away from the sheer intensity of his gaze.
“Stop talking to me.”
His voice wasn’t what James had been expecting, but he didn’t know why. It was quiet but rough. Hoars like he’d been coughing a lot recently.
James sighed. “That won’t get you far in here. You’ve got to make friends.”
“I don’t have to do anything.”
“What’s your name?” James prompted. “I’m James.”
The boy didn’t respond. James sighed, laying back down in defeat.
He got his answer when Diaz came back in. “Okay, Regulus,” she said gently. “I’ve got some meds for you. These are for the pain.”
Regulus.
What a strange name. James had never heard anything like it, and he rolled it over in his mind, wondering what it’d sound like on his tongue.
Regulus did not seem like he wanted to take the meds. Diaz fought him on it with practiced firmness. She dealt with difficult patients on the regular. James wondered if she ever wished he had a normal job at a normal hospital, or if she went home at night feeling satisfied like she was making a difference. Helping poor young souls who had ruined their lives before they’d even begun.
Eventually, Regulus took the meds, and he didn’t speak a word the rest of the night.
Diaz kept coming in to check on James because of his concussion, so he stayed up. He couldn’t tell if Regulus was actually asleep or not, but he’d stopped tugging at his handcuffs.
The next day passed at an incredibly boring and slow pace. But it was better than usual, at least James got out of counseling.
He talked at Regulus a lot, but Regulus never replied. He just stared at the ceiling as if James didn’t even exist. At one point in the afternoon, he started trying to dismantle his handcuffs. James just watched in amusement as he tried and failed. They were handcuffs, what did he think was going to happen? He could just pull them off?
James told him as much, and Regulus still didn’t respond, but he scowled at James’ words, and getting a reaction out of him pleased James, so he kept trying.
After twenty-four hours under medical care, James was deemed well enough to leave with instructions for taking care of his stitches until it was time to get them taken out. James didn’t even listen, he knew the drill.
He forgot about Regulus as he was led back to his cell that night. His cellmate was practically bouncing off the walls, talking excitedly about his release in a few days. James tried not to be too envious. A lot of kids who were released ended up back in here anyway, or worse, they got old enough to be sent to a real, adult prison when they reoffended.
James had two months until his time was up. Two months didn’t sound like a long time, but days crept along slowly, and James felt like he’d been at Mayfield for an eternity.
As he returned to his normal routine, he vowed to be more careful. With Dr. Pomfrey’s prodding about his self-destructive and self-harm tendencies, James didn’t want to be thrown into a mental institution after this. He just wanted to be free, or as free as he could get until he was eighteen.
He’d be seventeen in a few months, then there was only a year before he could do anything he wanted. He could use his childhood in his college essay, paint a noble sob story of a good kid in a bad situation and get into whatever college he wanted (hopefully). James was smart, and he did well academically, even now. If colleges were willing to look past his charges, James was pretty sure he could have a decent future. He had more hope than a lot of people in his situation. At least he had enough money saved for him to pay for college, a place, food, whatever he needed.
James tried his best to focus on that. He didn’t get into any more fights and tried not to bite Dr. Pomfrey’s head off during their sessions. He’d almost completely forgotten about Regulus until the day after his cellmate was released. James knew it wouldn’t be long until someone else was put in his cell, he wasn’t however expecting that person to be the wounded and skittish boy from a few days earlier.
When Regulus was brought in, he just glared at James. Clearly, he remembered James and probably didn’t like him very much.
Great. James hoped Regulus wasn’t the type to try and slit his throat in his sleep.
“Fancy seeing you here,” James grinned. “So I guess you didn’t manage an escape plan then?”
“Fuck you,” Regulus spat before moving to the free bed. He laid down with his back to James.
James sighed. At least his last cellmate could hold a conversation, James had almost liked him. Regulus didn’t seem like he’d be as willing to play cards with James.
They were woken up at six a.m. as usual and James instantly scrambled up, used to the routine.
Regulus was slower to get up, getting out of bed as if each movement pained him. He just stood there blankly for far too long and James decided to help him out since he was new.
“Make your bed,” James whispered. “We only get five minutes to clean up. You’ve got to be standing at the door with your hands behind your back when they’re opened.”
Regulus looked irritated by the help, but he quickly made his bed. He worked fast, tucking in the corners perfectly. James might have wondered if Regulus had been in juvie before if not for the way he clearly didn’t know what to expect.
Regulus copied James’ stance as they stood at the cell doors. Feet set apart, hands behind his back, eyes staring straight ahead.
“You’re lucky, our pod gets breakfast first today,” James whispered.
Regulus didn’t seem like he thought himself lucky.
Breakfast was the same as ever, the food was passable, though not exactly good. Brian was glaring daggers at James from across the room. James ignored it, sitting down beside Regulus to eat. Regulus didn’t exactly welcome the company, but he didn’t try to hit James over the head with his plate either.
“So, first time then?” James asked. He didn’t really expect Regulus to answer and just continued to speak when no reply came. “Don’t worry, the first week or so is the worst. After that, you settle into the routine. As long as you do whatever the officers say and don’t get into trouble it’s not so bad. Don’t get in fights, and definitely don’t disrespect the officers.”
“You don’t seem like you follow your own advice,” Regulus muttered looking down at his food.
James was a little startled that Regulus had actually responded. He grinned, stretching his arm with the stitches. “Eh, the staff likes me. It’s just some of the other boys that don’t. But I’m done with that now. I get out in a couple of months, can’t risk it.”
“How long have you been here?”
James didn’t think Regulus actually cared, he was just trying to map out what he might expect. James respected that. He thought Regulus would probably do fine. He was clearly itching to get out already and he seemed smart enough to do whatever he needed to make that happen as quickly as possible.
“About a year,” James shrugged. “It wasn’t supposed to be that long, but I had pretty bad behavior in the beginning. I tried to fight the officers during intake and everything, bad idea. The more you comply the better it goes.”
Regulus just blinked down at the table, fists clenched. He was probably wondering what James did to get in here, but he didn’t know if it was safe to ask. James decided to satiate the curiosity, he didn’t mind telling.
“They threw me in here because I stole a car,” James explained.
That got Regulus to look up. James felt a thrum of satisfaction as the other boy’s dark eyes met his. Up close, he could see something haunted in the grey of Regulus’ irises. Hidden just below the same dark rage that James had noted a few days before.
“Did you?” Regulus asked like he wasn’t sure whether to believe him.
“Well… among other things,” James admitted sheepishly. “It wasn’t my first offense, then I drove it off a bridge. Couldn’t shake off that charge so easy.”
“Did you do it on purpose?”
Everything about Regulus was blunt and rough, but James was pretty sure he liked it. There weren’t many interesting things in his day-to-day life, and Regulus was very interesting. James thought maybe Regulus was interested by him too, because he hadn’t expected the conversation to continue.
“I’m not sure you can steal a car by accident.”
“Drove it off a bridge,” Regulus said flatly.
“Oh,” James shrugged carelessly. “Who knows? It wasn’t a very big bridge, just an exit ramp, really. Not sure it counts as a bridge. But it was raised and it’s more dramatic if I say I drove off a bridge.”
You know, Regulus’ eyes seemed to say. But his mouth stayed shut, deeming the conversation over.
James however, wasn’t done, and he spent the rest of breakfast rambling on about the school they had to do and recreational time.
Regulus pretended he wasn't listening, but James had a feeling he was tucking away every bit of information for later.
The police officer had said Regulus liked to run. James didn’t think that was it. He didn’t seem like a runner. Those people itched, they barely sat still, eyes darting around for any exit or breaks they might exploit. Regulus was still, his shoulders tense, and eyes calculated. He didn’t seem like he was searching for exits, but instead cataloging information and any signs that might mean danger for him.
Regulus seemed more like a survivor than a runner to James.
His suspicions were confirmed when Brian caught James' eyes across the room and made a crude motion that clearly meant, you’re dead.
Regulus instantly seemed to shrink, making himself small, unnoticeable. James just shook his head.
“Ignore him,” James told Regulus. “Brian is an ass, but his punches are weak. Barely gave me a concussion. Plus, he won’t try anything right now, he’s just posturing. He’s on thin ice after trying to gut me.”
As predicted, Regulus didn’t say a word in response. Typical.
They were separated during class and James didn’t see Regulus again until they were led back to the cafeteria for lunch and James sat down beside him.
Regulus didn’t speak, but James could have sworn Regulus' tight shoulders relaxed just the smallest bit. It was probably a relief to see a familiar face. At least Regulus knew James wasn’t an immediate threat to him.
This time, James didn’t speak at him and they just ate in silence.
Regulus seemed to like James better that way, and strangely, James found himself wanting to gain the kid’s trust. He remembered what his first few days had been like. He’d been terrified.
The thought was enough to respect Regulus’ clear desire for silence when they went to bed that night.
The next few weeks passed pretty much the same. James talked at Regulus sometimes, and he rarely responded. Sometimes, they just existed together in silence, and James didn’t mind it as much as he expected. They stuck together.
It was probably just because Regulus didn’t know anyone else, and James had enough of a reputation to keep people from messing with him for the most part. James wasn’t sure if Regulus knew about that until he spoke suddenly, during their in-cell break between school one day.
“Did you really break somebody’s jaw for calling you a slur?”
James was so surprised by Regulus starting a conversation first that he nearly dropped the book he was holding.
As James looked up, he took in Regulus sitting stiffly on his bed, eyes fixed on the floor. His shoulders never seemed to relax and sometimes James found himself wondering what exactly had brought Regulus here.
“I did,” James said with a grimace. “That was a while ago, and I don’t recommend, by the way. It got me in a lot of trouble. Better to let people say whatever shit they want and just ignore them.”
“But no one messes with you now.”
“Some of them don’t,” James admitted. “But people like Brian and his friends still try to get at me. Especially now, they know I’m supposed to get out soon, they try to provoke me.”
Predictably, Regulus didn’t continue the conversation, so James went back to his book until they were let out again.
__
“It’s been a while since you’ve had any fights,” Dr. Pomfrey remarked.
“Guess so,” James shrugged.
“You’ve only got about a month left until you’re released.”
James just nodded.
He didn’t want to talk about his life after juvie. He didn’t want to think about his fucking social worker or being shipped off to yet another home.
It’s only a year, was what James had been chanting over and over again as he got closer to leaving Mayfield. One year was all he had to survive without getting in any more trouble.
Pomfrey tried to pry into James' supposed self-destructive tendencies and James deflected, instead talking about how bad the food had been at lunch and the book he’d been reading.
Eventually, the doctor seemed to realize she wasn’t getting anything out of James today and let him explain the plot of the book scene by scene.
When he was finally freed from the session, James sighed in relief.
He really had vowed not to get in any more trouble.
Trouble, however, always seemed to find him.
James and Regulus were silently tossing a ball back and forth later that day. Full of pent-up energy from his counseling session, James didn’t try to speak to him. They just existed in silence that had somehow become comfortable between them over the month since Regulus’ arrival.
He still didn’t speak often, and James didn’t know a thing about him or his past. But at this point, James had clearly earned some sort of trust because Regulus always sought James out and stayed by his side. Whether that was simply for protection or not, James didn’t care. He’d grown used to Regulus always being there like a silent shadow, and he often found himself feeling oddly naked whenever Regulus wasn’t.
James spotted Brian approaching over Regulus’ shoulder. He didn’t think he’d visibly reacted, but Regulus was perceptive, attuned to even the most minuscule shift. He stiffened, walls going up, something flashing behind his eyes.
“Hey, Potter,” Brian sneered.
“What’s up, Cox?” James asked casually. Regulus tossed the ball to James, and this time he held it to his chest without throwing it back.
“You know what’s up,” Brian said roughly. “You need to pay for what you did.”
“You’re the one who stabbed me,” James pointed out. “It’s not my fault you got caught.”
“You did it on purpose,” Brian hissed. “You wanted to get me in trouble.”
“Nah, really I just wanted a day off, getting you in trouble wasn’t the goal.”
That only seemed to make Brian angrier. He advanced, rage flashing in his eyes. “You’re dead, don’t think I won’t fuck you up just because your shadow is here. Maybe it’s time he learns how things work around here. You won’t be here for much longer to protect him.”
Something sharp flashed in Regulus’ eyes at that. He was still facing James, not looking at Brian who stood behind him. For a moment they just held each other’s gaze. Then, Regulus did the last thing James expected. He spoke.
“Leave him alone.”
Brian laughed at that. “Aw, got some teeth in there after all?”
Regulus, who was always trying to make himself smaller, invisible, straightened up. James watched in awe as right in front of his eyes, Regulus transformed. His spine straightened; his eyes hardened.
“Yes,” Regulus said rounding on Brian. “You might want to leave before you get bit.”
“You don’t fucking scare me,” Brian scoffed.
“Then you’re stupider than you look. Which really, is quite a feat. Someone should get you a trophy because you look stupid, even before you open your mouth.”
James might have laughed if he didn’t know what was coming.
He really didn’t want to be getting in fights when he was so close to leaving. Fuck.
Brian threw the first punch, making contact with Regulus’ jaw with a crunch. The officers were already rushing over at first contact, but James knew they wouldn’t make it before Brian managed to do some damage. Regulus staggered backwards and James started forward. It turned out he didn’t need to do a thing.
James was about to intervene when suddenly Regulus ducked the second swing, and before James could even blink Regulus had Brian laid out flat on his back, gasping for breath.
Regulus leaned over Brian, his eyes blazing. Ah, so there was that anger. “My mother hits harder than you,” Regulus spat.
James didn’t think it was just a taunt. There was a sliver of truth in Regulus’ words.
Before anything else could happen, the officers were there restraining them. He knew Regulus would get in trouble for this, as he was pulled back, James met his eyes. Regulus just nodded at James in silent acknowledgment. There was a bruise already blooming on his cheek and a realization hit James.
Regulus might have chosen to fight Brian because he knew James was leaving and he wanted the same reputation James had in order to keep him safe. It’d probably work. Maybe even better than it had for James. Because Regulus’ retaliation had been more than just proving he could fight back. He’d embarrassed Brian by laying him out with such ease. If anyone else wanted to try Regulus, they’d risk making themselves look like an idiot. Taken down by the scrawny kid.
But there was a possible second reason too. It lingered in the nod Regulus had sent James.
Regulus had done it so James didn’t have to. So his release wasn’t affected.
James didn’t know what to think about that. Maybe he was just imagining it. James didn’t even think Regulus liked him.
But Regulus’ nod stuck in James’ head.
When Regulus finally returned, James jumped up from his bed.
“You shouldn’t have done that.”
Regulus shrugged wordlessly before lying down on his bed.
“Regulus,” James said, putting enough insistence into his voice that Regulus looked his way.
“James,” Regulus said simply. Not a question, not the beginning of a sentence, just James’ name.
He didn’t think Regulus had ever said his name before. It stopped James dead for a moment, unable to remember what he’d meant to say.
Regulus blinked expectantly, clearly waiting for James to speak.
He swallowed, trying to find his footing.
“Why did you do it?” James questioned his voice a little hoarse.
“Seemed like a good idea at the moment,” Regulus replied evenly.
“That’s not why.”
Regulus sat up, his gaze heavy over James’ skin. “You’ll be gone soon,” he said simply. It could have been an answer to either of James’ suspicions.
Maybe both were true. Maybe Regulus had more than one reason.
“Your next roomie probably won’t be as cool as me,” James remarked instead of asking questions he knew Regulus wouldn’t answer.
“Maybe they’ll talk less,” Regulus grumbled.
It was almost… teasing. Regulus was teasing James.
“Don’t get in trouble without me, then you’ll be out soon too.”
“And what?” Regulus raised his eyebrows. “And I can come find you and we’ll ride off into the sunset? Be poster children for reformed troubled kids?” It might have been the longest sentence James had ever heard Regulus speak, and for the first time, James caught a glimpse of an actual personality beneath Regulus’ perpetual silence.
“If you’d like. Or I can steal more cars and you can be my accomplice.”
“I wouldn’t be the accomplice; I’d be the mastermind.”
James grinned at that. “With your help, I’d probably be a bit more successful this time.”
Regulus almost looked like he wanted to smile.
He didn’t have another remark, and that was more familiar to James. He shot Regulus a hesitant smile. “But really, I don’t have anyone or anything waiting for me on the other side,” James admitted. “I don’t know if you do but… James Potter, you could find me if you wanted. I’m not sure how many other people have my name.”
“It’s not that uncommon,” Regulus muttered.
James was just happy to get another reply out of Regulus. “You know,” he mused. “I don’t think I ever caught your last name.”
“It’s been said,” Regulus shrugged. “If you never paid attention that’s on you. And… I’ll be in here a while. So don’t hold your breath.”
“Well, the invitation is always open.”
“Noted.”
He didn’t agree, but he didn’t disagree either. That was good enough for James.
__
Things shifted after the fight with Brian.
Regulus was still as silent as ever when there were around people, but sometimes alone in their cell, Regulus would speak.
He didn’t talk about himself or anything that mattered. James still knew very little about him aside from things he could observe.
Regulus hated red meat, he could get competitive in card games and sometimes during sports too if he was pent up enough (though he didn’t seem to enjoy sports at all, only the outlet for his constant rage). He read far faster than James did and refused to spoil books for James even when he begged. He was smart, probably brilliant, and was a year younger than James, but on the same level academically.
James sometimes found himself wishing that Regulus had come sooner so they’d have more time together. James longed to finally crack Regulus’ shell and really figure out what was underneath. Why he was so angry all the time, yet so quiet too?
On James’ last week in juvie, he woke with unease prickling under his skin.
“What’s wrong?” Regulus asked. He was making his bed methodically and didn’t turn around to look at James, but somehow, he’d noticed.
As they stood together at their cell doors as they did every morning, James took a deep breath. “I was so ready to get out of here, but now I’m scared,” James whispered. “I don’t know how to make something of myself after this.”
“You will,” was all Regulus said, with such conviction that James felt it warming in his chest. For some reason, Regulus believed in him.
“How do you feel about your release?” Dr. Pomfrey asked James four days before he was set to leave.
James shifted in his seat, looking down at his fingernails. “Worried,” he said in a rare show of honesty.
“Why don’t you elaborate on that?” Pomfrey asked gently.
James swallowed. “I’m not sure I’ll do well in the real world again. I don’t exactly like it here, but I’m used to it. At least I know what to expect every day. At least I’m not living every day expecting to be shuffled between homes, hauling the few things I have around in a trash bag. At least no one pretends to be anything better than they are. I- I’m worried I got so used to being here I won’t know how to be a person outside of it. Like going to high school, making friends, having a social life, going out places, going shopping… those are all things I haven’t had to worry about in a long time. What if I don’t remember how to do any of it when I get out?”
“Those are all very normal fears,” Pomfrey said gently. “Let’s discuss some ways we might be able to ease and cope with your transition…”
Three days before release day, James couldn’t sleep.
“Stop moving around,” Regulus grumbled into the dark as James shifted for the millionth time, his bed creaking.
“Sorry,” James whispered, trying to lie perfectly still. He failed after a few moments, turning over again.
Regulus sat up suddenly, and even through the dark James could sense his glare. “James,” Regulus snapped.
“Sorry, sorry,” James apologized again. “I’m just nervous. I’ll stop moving I promise.”
Regulus sighed. He stared at James for a long moment before suddenly getting up and creeping over to James’ bed. He really wasn’t supposed to do that, but a quick glance at the cell door told James no one was watching to reprimand them.
James sat up, moving over to allow Regulus space to sit down on the bed next to him. James didn’t think they’d ever touched before, and he was surprised by how warm Regulus was as their knees bumped.
“Will you miss me?” James whispered.
“No,” Regulus said instantly, but James didn’t think he believed that.
“You’ll be okay?”
“I can handle myself.”
James knew that, but he still didn’t like the idea of leaving Regulus alone.
“I know, but it’ll be lonely here.”
“I’m used to lonely,” Regulus said, a tiny bit of honesty he so rarely offered up.
“The invitation still stands if you want to come find me when you get out.”
“I know, I remember.”
That was as much as James could ask for. “Just don’t forget about me, okay? And don’t do anything stupid.”
“I’m not stupid, that’s you.”
James rolled his eyes. “I seem to remember you wiping the floor with Brian Cox.”
“He did that to himself. He shouldn’t have underestimated me.”
James laughed at that, shaking his head. “Fair.” He took a deep breath, meeting Regulus’ eyes. “Just promise not to forget me, okay?”
“Okay.”
“You promise?”
“That’s what I just said.”
“I need something more binding.” James held out his pinky, raising his eyebrows.
Regulus sighed, clearly annoyed, but after a moment he hooked their pinkies together. His hand was warm against James’.
“I promise not to forget you.”
“Good. I won’t forget you either. I’m going to make a great life for myself. I’ll be so cool and successful you’ll have no choice but to be in awe of me.”
“We’ll see about that,” Regulus said, but he held their pinkies together for a moment longer than he needed to.
On the day of his release, James jumped out of bed as soon as he woke, adrenaline pounding in his bloodstream.
“Looks like you get out of here today, Potter,” an officer remarked. James grinned in reply.
It was only as he was about to leave that he looked back. Regulus was just standing there, his dark eyes unreadable.
James raised his pinky in a reminder, and after a second, Regulus raised his as well. A promise, a flicker of hope burning in James’ chest.
As James headed towards freedom, he couldn’t help but feel it was bittersweet.
He hoped… but he wasn’t sure he’d ever see Regulus again.