Hello! I'm finally here! You updated when I was sleeping; this morning I saw the chapter... and I went crazyi I think I read this chapter like... 4 times? (in the bus, on my way to my fucking work; in subway, on my way for class; in subway again, on my way for home; on my sofa, right after my luch :-|).
Sooo... a little warning: Last time I commented, I didn't have my computer but right now, I have my keybord on the tips of my fingers and... I TALK TO MUCH, I WRITE TOO MUCH. I'm deeply sorry for word womit.
*** "This chapter isn't as long as the first, but I'd still call it sizeable." --> Honey, it's fine. Are you fucking kidding me? It's 7000 words?! It's MORE THAN FINE. GOD BLESS YOUR HANDS, YOUR FINGERS, YOUR KEYBOARD, YOUR WORDS AND YOUR BRAIN.
*** I just want to begin with Arty. First of all, she is mine now, OK? She is my child; I will protect her until I die. But if leave aside my dramatic ass, I really love her character. This chapter, we saw her *deeply*. Her fears more clean to me; I kinda understand she is scared of 'something', she is scared 'because of something'. I really love how she goes in a catatonic mode cause... I love to see (read) different reactions: She didn't cry, she didn't scream; she did puke and she went a catatonic mode. I think she has a trauma - actually, we saw that; you hinted that she has some problems with this whole soulmate 'thing'. I'm really curious, I actualy have some theories but I will mention that later. *** " Her mother, crying. Ripping at her hair and cursing the world.
Tony Stark, face on every paper and news channel for weeks and weeks with the headlines in bold: Stark Missing, CEO Presumed Captured, Billionaire Believed Dead After Three Months. " --> I really like this part; how they intertwined. Tony and Arty... like they are parallel lines but actually they are 'the same lines' (I don't know if I make sense to you; I can't express me in English like I want to be, I'm sorry :-< ). They have traumas and fears, I feel like they have same experiences; and like Tony has PTSD, I think Arty has some mental illness kind of similar to Tony's. But even if they began like this; even in the beginning they are hesitant each other, they will understand each other deeply in the end. And it will be awesome cause I feel like they need each other; Arty is gonna hug Tony in his nightmares and Tony is gonna hold Arty in her panic attacks - they are not gonna heal each other (it is impossible, i believe) but they are gonne be good for each other (I have Panic Stress Disorder, I think someone with similar experiencess will be good for me, lol). Soooo... I'm really excited; I want to see their love and understanding - I want to read it, really.
And I like how you write this paragraph, it's a classical flashback scenes but you make them parallel, you make it about 'them' and I think it's a beautiful emphasis on their 'relationship' and characters.
*** "Gas and leather." --> I don't know what was happened but I said I have theories, right? So... 1. She has a mother who was/is a junkie. Maybe her mother was/is abusive? I remember in first chapter, Arty said she was kinda 'running from her problems'? 2. I think there is a fire? Maybe she burned; she has scars? Maybe her soulmark burned? 3. "Dear God, not you." This has a meaning, right? First I thought that it is like... she is anxious about their 'differences' and she likes him; she is kind of a fangirl? But no, now I know that her fears are more than this. But I really want to know: Guuurrrlll, honeyyyy, my beautiful ocean eyed sunshine smiled angel, Artys-Partsy, WHY DID U SAID THAT?! (ashgdshjdshf).
*** I really like Brit; she is really a good character, not just a second role. She is a good friend too, I think she will be very supportive and helpful to Arty about this soulmate thing.
*** "The pigeon cooing outside the living room window? Hysterical.
The two marshmallows stuck together from the box of cereal she was devouring? Priceless.
The empty water bottle that fell to the carpet with a light putt? Practically a stand-up comedian."
+
"Gonna’ strangle myself.” --> I laughed so hard in this parts. I love how fucking stupid is Arty asdfsfdfd - my smol, pocket sized summer beach, my sweet catatonic histeric mime queen. <3
*** “Sooo…are we gonna’ address the iron armor in the room?” --> Did I said I love Brit. I love Brit.
***Annnnnddd Tony… my beautiful man who suffered a lot, who is most precious- OK, OK, I stop. :D
*** Did I said “I love your Tony cause this is really Tony Stark™”? I saw that again in this chapter; his genius but anxious mind, his mechanic but useless hands, his tired but sleepless nights… that “Arty” folder over there… he didn’t touch, he couldn’t even touch it. I love how you write him, how your write him ‘right’; the Tony I know would did that too. He was so fucking curious but he didn’t touch that folder; he didnt’ even look at her name - just asked her number. *sighs* I love you Tony and I love you Candle. <3
***”Dear god, not you.
It was fifteen feet behind him, at approximately a thirty-degree angle to his right, and precisely three and half feet off the ground.
Dear god, not you. …” --> This part was same as Arty’s ‘gas and leather’ part. Like I said, I love how you intertwined them like this. And their parts are actually ‘different’: In Arty’s part, we see echoes of her memories; her personal ones and her soulmate’s… in Tony’s part, we see echoes of his soulmate’s words and his movements. But in the end, it’s actually not about themselves; it is about their soulmates. I think both of them are very selfless persons and like Tony; Arty can’t see herself like we see her (I think she blames herself for something but I could be wrong, who knows? - Writer knows :D ).
***DUM-E!!!! MY SOFTEST BOI IN THE WORLD!! MY BABYYY!!! I adore how you write him (I referred DUM-E as a ‘boi’, I hope I’m not misgendered but he is a cute little boy in my mind, like always :-<) and I adore how you write their relationship!!! Tony refers himself as DUM-E’s ‘pops’, he calls him ‘Dums’… I love them - really, you give me what MCU didn’t give me :D. I hope you make Avengers as a Family, not… the MCU mess. :/
***I was squeaking when I read Tony-Dums parts; they were really cute and their dynamic… asasdsdsfd Dums writing on the glass, “W<>MFN”, “dumbbell”… thank you, you made my day.
***And the message… the Tony Stark™ again… this was so fucking original but again, so fucking ‘Tony’… this Cindrella mess, I really love how a stupid sneaker is going to be their meeting (and mayhaps ‘bonding’) reason afsfdgdgf. “Arty’s eye twitched.” --> BEST. ENDING. HERE.
***Sooo… Last but not least, I want to say I was DISSAPPOINTED… about how we didn’t find Arty’s name… ashsfjfjf. I thought about this so much but a just have 1 theory… A R T E M I S. I don’t know any other name can be goes by ‘Arty’ - actually I think about ‘Martha’ too but I’m not gonna make BvsS jokes, don’t worry. :-}
***”Also...guess who see each other again in Chapter 3?” ---> I’m so fucking hyped up, you don’t even know. *dancing emoticon here*
THANK YOU AGAIN!!! I will be waiting for you; take your time, drink some tea, take a nap and try to be happy please - lots of love, Moons. <3
(Also, I think I reaaaalllllyyy talked so much, you don’t have to read this mess, I’m sorry again for my big stupid mouth.)
PS: I'm sorry for my spelling fails too, I wrote this SLEEPDEPRIVED™ and it looks like I DON'T KNOW HOW TO WRITE IN ENGLISH *facepalm*.
Breaking news: I’m printing your reviews out and stapling them to my coffin.
Never, ever ever ever apologize for your comments, never apologize for them being long, I love and adore every single bit of them and I’ve reread them 20 times.
Your words are nourishing me from the inside out, I’m getting all my vitamins and minerals, I feel like I’m having a damn spa day with how well you treat me!! I was making a smoothie this morning and started tearing up while thinking about this, your reviews carry my heart and soul through work.
Give me every ounce of word vomit, word vomit is my favorite meal <3
I love, love, love that you love Arty! She’s been growing in my mind for years and I’m so glad so many people have taken a liking to her. She def has some traumaTM because how could anyone fated to be Tony’s Soulmate not have trauma tbh.
You’ve picked up on so many of my other parallels between them too and I LOVE you for it. I literally have no words to describe how your enthusiasm is giving me life and it just makes me all the more eager to get these chaps out.
As to the specific source (or sources) of Arty’s problem and why she said what she said…well, that’ll become much clearer in the next two chapters :D I can’t wait to see what you think of them and honestly I hope I don’t disappoint, lol.
And YES—Brit has been an integral part of Arty’s life/growth in certain ways and she knows what she needs better than anyone, bless
Regarding the second part:
First of all, how DARE you guess her name right off the bat (Batman pun notwithstanding, but it sure as hell ain’t Martha).
Second of all, I’m kidding, I love that you got it <3 It wasn’t my intent for it to be a huge mystery, but I did want Tony to figure it out in his way first as it does have special significance to her character/relationships
Speaking of Tony—I stan one Legend, one beautiful Legend who can never see himself the way others do and is so good at his core. 20/10 would die for him, 20/10 would die for his relationship with his bot kids, 20/10 am not putting him through the ringer on purpose.
And thank YOU again, your reviews brighten my skies and clear me of my ills, and your English is still the bomb-dot-com
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arianarime on Chapter 2 Tue 19 Feb 2019 08:50PM UTC
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arianarime on Chapter 2 Tue 19 Feb 2019 08:53PM UTC
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CandleWisps on Chapter 2 Thu 21 Feb 2019 08:40PM UTC
Last Edited Thu 21 Feb 2019 08:42PM UTC
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