Good luck with the upcoming interviews! I hope you find something better.
Sorry for the delay....was out and about this last weekend. Please know that I am not trying to get you to change anything...I'm just commenting in general! I'd never suggest that someone change their story just 'cause I might have gone a different way with it.
Hmmm....I didn't actually get the feeling that Anakin was talking about other people's feelings towards Tahiri -- it seemed to me that he was commenting on the fact that none of the other team had feelings for ANYONE that approached his feelings for Tahiri. Which, of course, would be impossible to know....and is what I was actually commenting on.
The 'differing point of view' is a great way to tell a story, actually. I would suggest, however, that this seems mainly only from Tahiri's and Anakin's POV...at least so far!
Sorry! I totally missed the meaning of your comment, and may have also just assumed you were talking about something else. And you are right - Anakin would have no way of knowing how anyone else felt about their possible significant others. I think I have Tahiri address her and Anakin's assumption that they knew what others were thinking later on. If you last that long!
And you are right - most of the chapters are written either from Tahiri's or Anakin's POV for a ways yet, though Han, Jaina, Jacen, Leia, and Winter all do have POV's eventually. Actually - I think Luke does too, and Kell Tainer... But - the point I was trying to make here was more about the concept that two people can 'see' the same event but come away with different perspectives - and that on the Anakin and Tahiri POV chapters - what they are seeing, thinking, or believing isn't necessarily exactly what did happen, and the idea that they are still very young, in spite of what they are doing, is still their perspective, and it's not that hey are lying - but rather that their perspective is colored by their own experiences.
No worries...clearly what I had written wasn't quite what I meant to get across.
And you do bring up an interesting topic in life: two people can look at the same thing and come to two completely different conclusions.
So....I just finished the chapter where Anakin dies (again.) Telling it in the third-person does give it a bit more impact...but removes some of the 'impending doom' impact that having it first-person would have done. But it was still really good. Tahiri's "....You LEFT him...." makes more a lot more sense here than Jaina's in the book. In the original, Jaina was THERE and knew what the stakes were, so for her to say that was just....ridiculous. Not sure what to make of Tahiri's pregnancy, though.
I know that Anakin isn't going to stay 'dead', but you could have gone with 'older' Tahiri continue to flow-walk to find a way to prevent his death....and having him keep dying: could have been one of those don't-mess-with-history kind of stories. You could have kept changing the 'future'...where some outcomes are better, some worse.
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KC10FltEng on Chapter 2 Mon 21 Jun 2021 02:51PM UTC
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