There are so many sad but sweet Grunt moments in this chapter and I love every single one of them.
* Okeer had little to say about parents, his words and images focused more on legacy. But Shepard, Shepard is like the mother he's never had. He doesn't want to lose her.
* He should've talked to her more. Asked her more. Grunt had questions, he just hadn't cared about the answers. Now he may never get to know. If she doesn't wake up, he won't get to ask her about Earth, her past, how humans work. While two of those things he can learn on his own, he doesn't want to. He doesn't want her to leave.
* "You can't die yet Shepard." His voice cracks for the first time in his life. "Don't die." He'd give anything for her to stand back up and talk to him again.
Throughout the course of the game it's hard to picture him as he is, just a kid. A teenager at most. While I'm sure krogan age differently both physically and emotionally than humans it's nice to see him being vulnerable for once and the way you go about it makes it super believable for his character too.
I'm so glad you enjoyed the chapters. What's even better is that you've quoted specific moments you liked and that helps me know what's working for the fic. I'll make sure to continue to try and write Grunt in a believable way.
Navigating what age physically and mentally Grunt is has been one of my greatest challenges while writing this fic. I don't want to infantilize him, but I also know he's not fully grown. He was purposely supposed to be the size of a full grown krogan but not have fully grown plates, to make him look baby-ish. He can do things any adult can, but at the same time he has moments where he is a kid. Wanting to give Liara a shiny blue rock, going through puberty, him calling Shepard to bail him out, and the way he spends his free time googling dinosaurs, and trying to learn how to spell words. These moments are the ones I've really been using as a guideline for how to write Grunt. Appearances are that he's an adult, but really he's a teen. People keep assuming he's grown but he's still got a lot of emotional and mental growth to go. Krogans and humans are different and apparently, the rite makes a krogan an adult, but I don't think Grunt has done enough living yet to be an adult emotionally, or mentally yet.
Sorry for that whole rant. I've been wanting to talk about Grunt for a long time. Thank you so much for your comments again!
To be honest, in the past I've never really commented on fanfics that much. I have social anxiety and I always felt slightly intimidated. Someone taught me the trick of picking a quote or two that stands out and bringing attention to it and I've gotten better at it. There's been a part of me that worries that it's annoying doing that but hearing you say that is a confidence booster. So thanks for that. And thanks for sharing this amazing story you've written. It's been helping me cope with some things I've been going through
I can understand with feeling intimidated by commenting. Back when I first started reading and writing fanfic I didn't know what to comment. That's a really useful trick they taught you though, I'm envious haha. Wish someone had given me that advice. Most writers I know enjoy it when people pull quotes, because then it shows them what readers are connecting with.
I'm happy to share the story. I'm even happier that it is helping you cope with some stuff you're going through. I actually wrote it to cope with my own stuff. Good luck, and I hope things go well for you.
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