Comment on Shogun: Becoming

  1. NickelWick on Chapter 8 Mon 26 Jun 2023 01:38AM UTC

    Haha thanks!! Your timing couldn't be more perfect; I'm almost done with the next chapter and it should be out within a week ;)

    And great suggestion! I was actually planning on having an Ash and Shogun convo in an upcoming chapter (not the next one, but the one after), because I realized the two haven't really had a one-on-one talk yet. Ash has been giving all the other ninja good advice based on their alternate selves, but not Lloyd--who is arguably the one he's closest to besides Nya. I'll definitely bring up the family bit too, considering both Lloyds have a LOT of issues with their dads. Thanks for the suggestion, and feel free to keep doing so in the future! I like getting feedback like that, gives me some good ideas!

    Thanks again, really glad you've been liking it so far!!

    Comment Actions

    1. Hijabiwriter on Chapter 8 Mon 26 Jun 2023 03:15AM UTC

      Of course! Thanks. Wait, aren't Ash and Shogun the same person though? Or was that just an error? Either way, I'm glad you liked my suggestion. If you want, I'd be happy to suggest more :)

      Comment Actions

      1. NickelWick on Chapter 8 Wed 28 Jun 2023 10:23PM UTC

        Welp, this is embarrassing...yeah, I meant to say Ash and Lloyd. And yeah, feel free to drop some suggestions! It's how we got Ash Ketchum and Octonauts-loving Garmadon after all!

        Comment Actions

        1. Hijabiwriter on Chapter 8 Thu 29 Jun 2023 02:08AM UTC

          Maybe they talk about family and Shogun spills that he's from an alternate universe and Lloyd is kinda shocked but not really and tells the others. And then Ash/Shogun comes clean and asks for help back to his home after saying how he misses his family. When he asks for help, the whole scene should be sad and emotional and then end on a good note.

          Once again, you don't have to do this and if you do, you don't have to make it the exact same. It's YOUR story. Keep that in mind.

          Please check out my stories and leave a comment as well-it would help! Thanks so much!

          Comment Actions

          1. NickelWick on Chapter 8 Thu 29 Jun 2023 03:45PM UTC

            Hm, that's a pretty good idea! Not sure if that's the direction I'll go in, just for the sake of drawing it out a little bit more, but when the truth does come out, you bet it's going to be emotional. Thanks for the suggestion though!

            And wow, a fellow writer!! I'll definitely have to check out your work sometime :)

            Comment Actions

            1. Hijabiwriter on Chapter 8 Thu 29 Jun 2023 03:57PM UTC

              Of course, anytime! If/when you ever need suggestions, ask and I will be happy to help, because at this point I have more ideas for your story than I do for my own, lol. :)

              Comment Actions