yknow i really THOUGHT i subscribed to this fic, and while i am forced to acknowledge that I was objectively mistaken on this point I am still choosing to take it very personally that ao3 didn’t notify me back when the chapter was originally posted. also it bears mentioning that i read this thing three times because i kept not finishing this comment and having to go back to keep my observations accurate… all things considered this was remarkably gratifying consequence of my crippling lack of focus. anyway, if this comes off even more manically scatterbrained than usual thats why
i think i might’ve mentioned something like this on the last chapter too, but there’s something almost palpable about how you write (and maintain) suspense. in particular the sequence with Elias giving Tim the tape (and Tim trying so so hard not to take it) had an almost nauseating sense of dread to it that went so hard, but also the more subtle disorienting tone throughout of Something Being Off with the characters perceptions. something is so clearly wrong but not in a way you can understand or anticipate. that sort of feeling. also, there’s the psychic jonelias teleflirting, which isn't strictly a suspense thing but I am mentioning it here anyway purely because of the upsetting mindfuckery it entails. love when your own thoughts are borderline indistinguishable from the machinations of your evil boss (also love aggressively projecting your spite at him via thought. 10/10 ways to to deal with a mindreader)
ooohhh my god your jon though. i didn't get the chance to properly appreciate how well you write him last chapter since he only had the very brief pov section, and I'm so glad the majority of this chapter is from his perspective because like… what a guy. what a totally singular wreck of a man. the overwhelming degree of self-aware stubbornness that motivates his every ill-advised action, his mentality regarding the institute and his assistants, his total unwillingness to communicate 90% of his thoughts and feelings, his extreme attachment to people he refuses to talk to, his masochistic guilt, the laughably backwards brand of logic that leads to him thinking it’d be a good idea to compel tim, the desperate and somewhat hopeless yet totally sincere efforts to be of use/help, and did I mention the overwhelming degree of self-aware stubbornness? istg, it must be the only way this man knows how to express spite. I love how intentional and willfully ridiculous it is. what. a. guy.
(now all I need is to see how you write Elias POV— i mean what who said that)
then theres the jontim!!! beyond capturing the baseline level of tragedy and tension that is their Essential Vibe, I really love a lot of the details and quieter nuances you put into their relationship and thoughts about each other. like, the scars—im REAL normal about the fact jontim have matching scars (from an event that was, in a way, the death knell of their friendship), and am always a little baffled about how infrequently it comes up in jt-related content, but you did such an amazing job exploring how they were each effected in unique ways, how they both took such different things away from the same experience and how they’re inextricably connected yet totally unable to empathize with one another… PLUS all the characterization in how the event itself went down (tim reflexively protecting jon… im fine this is fine). all of this goes double based on how corruption-coded the aftermath is, with the focus on the irreversible degradation of jon’s body and tim’s self-image, which is just another instance of you being really good when it comes to representing the fears. and really, what could be better proof that the corruption has tainted them both than how steadily their relationship has been rotting since that moment?
and the way they (don't) talk about Sasha? the fact it's her memory that finally breaks down the hostilities between them? the implicit understanding between them as they both get trash drunk about it? because it's a shared grief and neither of them have been able to acknowledge that. but also Jon's “I'm sorry I'm not Sasha” in the first scene and the WORLD of buried resentment in that one sentence. I really haven't thought much about that angle of their relationship, how she could directly play into his impostor syndrome and the sense that he's not good enough, combined with his possessiveness over the role of archivist and how unfair it is that everyone *still* thinks it should belong to her… 90% of which really just reflects his own admiration of her skills and guilt over her death because like, Tim is the only other person in the building still hung up on Sasha specifically… it's brilliant and awful and now that youve put it in my head I'm going to be chewing on it forever thanks
and the actual description of sasha as a person and their dynamic was also amazing. tbh I will get excited at any acknowledgement of jonsasha friendship, but the way you write sasha just like, inflicting herself on people until they agree to be friends with her? and orchestrating a jontim date through blatant trickery and disregard for informed consent (all because jon is Not Immune to the essential Tim Stoker Charm, which itself is deeply amusing to me)? absolutely fantastic characterization, 10/10. also love love love jon helping tim adjust to his exciting new career in Spooky Academia, which frankly I have not seen nearly enough (or… at all, actually). it just works!! you implicitly understand my vision for the three of them and I love you for that.
my absolute favorite scene though had to be the sequence with jon actually arriving at tim’s door—something about it just hit me like an absolute gut punch. like, jon’s first thought looking at tim being ‘this is wrong, this is NOT the man i know,’ only for tim to ask what’s happened to *him* in this very double-meaning kind of way, and the way Jon recognizes that meaning but still feels like he’s being laughed at by a stranger, even though he gets the joke, even though he’s *specifically* happy to hear tim stoker laughing. its the way they’ve both changed so much and for a moment they’re able to acknowledge that in a way thats dysfunctional as all hell but still a demonstration of mutual understanding. also very much love how jon is like "well everything about this sucks but if my pain makes tim happy that's a win." thats not the bit that choked the soul out of me but my god if its not hilarious and 100% on point (what a singular wreck of a man etc etc)
and then ofc there’s the ending… I'm really really normal about all the subtext in Jon tentatively admitting he wants to go back to the archives and tim fucking. agreeing to take him there. the level of progress that represents??? the vulnerability on jon’s part and tim’s acceptance of the biggest point contention between them?? beautiful beautiful way to show the positive shift in their relationship, and I can't wait to how it’ll all spectacularly implode on itself next chapter :3
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sapphorror on Chapter 2 Sun 13 Jul 2025 05:24PM UTC
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