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English
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Published:
2023-01-30
Updated:
2025-05-03
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16/?
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The truth, the lie and the gun

Chapter 2: Rising from the ash of ones life

Notes:

I was so inspired by your comments that I wrote an entire chapter in a day. So thank you so much for your kindness. English is not my native language, therefor there will be mistakes. Thank you for understanding!

(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)

Chapter Text

"Your dum-dum is out of jail", Kate said and lifted her cell phone in the air to show Penelope the article about Colin. Penelope's heart skipped a beat for a mere second after seeing his smile, but that was a secret she would take to her grave.

"He's not my anything", her response was short.

Kate raises her eyebrows, and with that simple, elegant move, she comments more than if she used her words. And when a person who uses words as a weapon does that, it becomes slightly annoying.

"I prepared the documents. Two of you have no children, no joint property...this divorce should be a piece of cake. However, there is an emotional component. You love him and you love them".

Kate poured herself a cup of tea (Indian, never English), took it gently, and brought it to her lips.

"They like me, but I am not a Bridgerton. Cressida's little video was proof enough. Three days after that, Daphne had a ball, and Cressida was still invited. What better way to send a message than what she implied was the truth? They like me, but since mine and Colin's marriage wasn't a love marriage, they do not see me as a Bridgerton, and therefore, they won't defend me as one. It's as simple as that".

Kate wanted to slap them so badly. Everything she knew about them, she knew from the media or whispers spoken under the cover of darkness. The Bridgertons were allegedly knee-deep in the criminal world, and yet they escaped the punishment others would receive. Their people were loyal to the core, violence was used only when needed, and there was a bit of truth in stories that even the authorities preferred this type of criminal organization if they had to choose one. She meet Penelope amid the scandal. She was sitting on the floor of her sister's apartment and crying her eyes out. Being a big sister was such a strong part of Kate's identity that her first instinct was to hug the poor girl. However, she didn't expect that Penelope would start to cry even strongly. When she found out that Kate hugging her was the first time somebody touched her (except Eloise, of course) since the entire mess started, she wanted to beat the shit out of somebody. A Bridgerton, preferably.

"At least Eloise is on your side," Kate didn't fail to notice how the smile was honest, for once, when that damned family was mentioned. Kathani Sharma could say so many mean things, but she would never deny the bond between the two girls. One could almost get jealous.

"She’s my soulmate."

"No wonder she's so smart. You could never be a soulmate to a fool". Penelope blushed at her words. My God, Kate loved that girl, and she knew her for several months. She was sweet, kind, and lovely, and under all that red hair, there was a deadly steel of determination. In a way, Penelope was like an onion. Even when you thought you had an idea of who she was and is, you would discover another incredible side of her. Kate would never say that out loud Bridgerton's loss was Sharma's gain, but there was no doubt in her mind that Kate and Edwina were the lucky ones to have her in their lives.

Violet Bridgerton was the happiest when all her children were around. And finally, they were. Finally, feeling her son's embrace made her weep with joy, and while nobody would confess, she could spot tears in the eyes of her children. The Bridgertons were the strongest when they were together.

Hyacinth and Gregory couldn't stop touching their brother, Daphne held her fists closed tightly to stop herself from doing the same, and Francesca, Anthony, and Benedict couldn't stop themselves from smiling. Even though she attempted not to look mad, Eloise couldn't hide her desire to punch her brother. Violet, for once, was applauding her daughter for controlling herself. There was a place and a moment for something like that.

And Penelope? Her heart aches at that poor girl's pain. Her daughter-in-law learned only the pain in her house, and Violet was adult enough to know just how guilty she was. Colin being in jail sent her once again down a dark path, and she was completely useless. Anthony told her firmly that Colin was all right. Being in a low-security prison that was under their control ensured he had better conditions than any other prisoner in the world, but still, that meant nothing to her. Her baby was behind bars. Violet was furious at Colin when she saw the tape, but she gravely underestimated just how disgusting people can be. And they reacted too slowly. She could only be grateful for Eloise and her standing up for Penelope. At least somebody showed her daughter-in-law that she was a member of the family, but it was too little too late. 

Penelope started to avoid them, and to Violet's lasting regret, she barely noticed that in the beginning. But the divorce papers came like a cold shower and a painful reminder that those who are not there on time do not need to be there in times of happiness. She tried to contact her God knows how many times, but the cell phone was turned off.

Violet scoffed, remembering that even Portia refused to listen, only to comment that she always warned her daughter of Bridgerton's selfishness and that now she knows just like everybody else. Nobody should gloat in that type of situation, but Portia somehow managed. But now with Colin's return, perhaps things can be talked over, and they can realize that they belong to each other. Violet was aware that she put a lot of hope in her son, who still didn't realize the true extent of his feelings, but nobody could say that she wasn't filled with hope.

"Will you hug me, Eloise, or are you planning on punching me?" Colin asked his sister, who was standing next to the fridge and looked at them with her hands crossed on her chest. "Still haven't decided."

Eloise did open her arms and hug him, and Violet could swear that everyone was breathing slightly lighter.

"I understand that you were just like her, the victim of that bloody deal, but what you did was horrible, and she didn't deserve it,"

Eloise was quiet. Colin nervously passed his finger through his hair and nodded.

"Sign the divorce papers and leave her alone." Colin was about to say something, but Eloise pointed a finger in his face.

"No. You will do that if you have any respect for her. If you ever consider yourself her friend..."

"She's my best friend...", Eloise grimaced like he said something dirty, "...and I need to do things right. I will sign the damn papers; I just need to talk to her".

"No," Eloise was direct. She looked at Violet like she was asking for support, and this time Violet knew she had to react.

"Colin, my dear, you are tired. You need to eat something".

Colin wasn't stupid enough not to know he was being played, but he could understand his sister. After all, two of them were the closest people Pen had in her life.

The first time Portia made Penelope cry, she promised to become stronger. After her mom made fun of her tears and her sisters joined the cruel entertainment, Penelope was smart enough to promise herself once again that she would become tough but was realistic enough to know that wouldn’t happen. It took her moving out of her mother’s house, university, and therapy (and lots of it) to realize that she could be happy and that her mother was a mean evil bitch who was unhappy. That of course didn’t change the fact that Penelope still loved Portia and would always want her love, which was just like the sun and moon - inevitable.

It was no coincidence that her love towards Colin was the same: without hope, without reason, and with the ability to break her over and over again. She should have known better. Her grandfather was a spiteful old man who hated his daughter, cared barely for his granddaughters, and owned the piece of land that the Bridgerton family desperately tried to get their hands on for 200 years. So, it was no wonder that he decided to manipulate Anthony Bridgerton. And he couldn’t resist, and neither could Penelope. Colin was the victim; she was aware of that and felt shame almost as much as she did happiness.

She hoped with every little piece of her being that he would fall in love, but he rather ended up in jail. Penelope wasn’t naïve. She grew up in the same society as the Bridgertons, but her family was not that rich, not beloved, but they still had their share in the criminal world. Just like every wealthy family. Of course, after her father's murder barely. But she knew. There was no doubt in her mind that Colin wanted to defend those girls but he also wanted to be free, and ending up in jail was a preferable option over being with her. She was sitting in the courtroom when the judge read the verdict and she could see the slight smile of relief on her husband’s face when he was sent to jail. At that moment, she decided to divorce him, to set him free. Her grandfather was dead, the land was Bridgertons, and she could walk away. Slowl,y she was preparing the terrain for that when Cressida released that tape.

How can something break you even when you are aware of it? That day, she learned that lesson. 

Funny thing, Cressida was right. The blackmail was involved, and Penelope welcomed the Internet hating her, for she deserved all the mean and hateful comments. At least, that was a justification in the dark moments of those days. It's easy to accept other people's hate when you hate yourself. Penelope’s naïve belief that the Bridgertons would be by her side was crushed, and she realized what everybody already knew: even with the ring on her finger, she wasn’t a Bridgerton. And that set her free.

After years and years of feeling small and less, finally she rose from the ashes of her own life and started to feel angry. Righteous anger burned her skin and soul. Fuck them all. Her mother and sisters were horrible. Just like the grandfather. She never made the deal, she never insisted on the marriage. She was just stupid enough to say yes to a boy she loved. She didn’t demand anything from him, and yet everybody treated her like shit.

No fucking more, she thought to herself that very day when cried herself out in Kate Sharma’s arms. Kate helped her with the paperwork for divorce. She moved out of Colin’s apartment, found a cute place for herself, changed her therapist, and started living like she never did. Eloise was proud, Kate was looking at her with delight, and for the first time, Penelope was as happy as she could be. During her journey to new life, she had no illusion, she would always love Colin Bridgerton. But she started a love relationship with herself and that felt good. It felt liberating.

“You should read that book. It’s amazing”, a deep male voice said. She turned and looked at a fine male specimen. Tall, blonde, and gorgeous. She almost wanted to ask him if was he talking to her only to realize that two of them were the only people in the row of the bookshop.

Penelope Featherington smiled like she never did before and proudly said: “I know, I wrote it”.

Notes:

I hope you liked it. I wanted to give you a glimpse into Pen's mind.