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Hit You in Your Blindside

Summary:

With one hand clutching at his chest and willing the tight band around it to release, Fives grabbed hold of Rex's wrist and squeezed.

"C-Captain, I can't…" He might as well have stopped sucking in breaths for all the good it was doing. Wasting energy, wasting… Air. He needed—"Breathe. Rex, I-I can't… can't breathe!" The last word barely escaped past lips that felt like they were a size or two larger than normal.

 

While acting as security for a diplomatic mission, Fives discovers a hidden allergy to the planet’s cuisine. It takes several reassurances from Rex to help him to get past the Kaminoans’ conditioning and every clone’s inbred fear of being decommissioned.

Notes:

Another idea I thought of with MnM_ov_doom. I never would’ve written this otherwise, so friend, this one’s for you! Enjoy!

Note: This fic contains depictions of a severe allergic reaction, so if that triggers you… read carefully, I guess.

(See the end of the work for more notes.)

Chapter Text

It wasn't a typical military campaign and that was always a little disconcerting. They were created for battle, not diplomatic procedures. Then again, Fives couldn't deny it was nice to have a little break now and again.

Because escorting Duchess Kryze and all those other senators to Coruscant was so easy.

If he hadn't been at a fancy banquet surrounded by Faerellen dignitaries and senators, Fives would've scoffed at the memory. That had been one heck of a trip… And it had been his last diplomatic mission, too, so… Here’s hoping this one turns out a little better.

Well, don’t jinx it.

Technically, the 501st was there as added security for the summit while the politicians discussed the pros and cons of Faerell joining the Republic, but the negotiations hadn't started yet and Fives felt entitled to a little bit of leisure. He had a feeling General Skywalker had only taken this mission because Senator Amidala was going to be there, though it wasn't his place to speculate about all that.

All he had to do right at that moment was enjoy himself like the general had ordered him to.

“The buffet over there is for everyone, so seriously, guys, eat whatever you want.”

Roger that, General.

"Doesn't this feel a little weird to you?" He almost rolled his eyes at his brother. It seemed like Echo had been determined to turn this nice buffet—one of the few lavish parties they'd ever been able to attend—into just another military campaign.

"No, actually," Fives replied with a smirk, "I feel right at home here."

This earned him a less-than gentle nudge. "You do not."

"Okay, fine, maybe it feels a little weird to walk around in all this armor while everyone else is dressed to the nines, but see? General Skywalker still has on his normal robes and chestplate." Fives shrugged and grabbed a plate. "And aren't we supposed to be added security, anyway? Echo, we’re supposed to be here. That’s our entire mission objective: to stand here and watch for danger. Can’t I do that from the buffet table?"

"I still think this would've been a better job for the Coruscant Guard," Echo grumbled. "They're usually security."

"Well, tonight, it's us, vod, and if you don't stop breathing your rules and regulations down my neck, I just might knock you out in a corner and leave you there." Shoving another plate at his brother, Fives grinned. "So, eat or something! When's the last time you've seen this much food all at once?"

As he began filling his plate, he noticed Echo slowly, cautiously following suit.

Good. About time you let loose for a minute or two, brother.

"What are you getting?" Echo asked a moment or two later.

Fives shrugged. "Whatever looks good. I don't even know what most of this stuff is, honestly."

"All right, so what if you don't like it?"

"Then I'll throw it out."

Echo gave him a look. "Do you know how many of our brothers who are out in the field living on rations would kill to be here right now? And you're just gonna throw it away?"

Winking, Fives added one last item to his plate. "Good thing I don't plan on not liking any of it. Not everyone is as picky as you."

"Hey! I’ll have you know, Kix doesn’t like weird food, either. And neither does Jesse."

“Then they’re missing out.”

With a chuckle, Fives took his meal to a nearby pillar and leaned against it, now only half-focused on keeping watch over the senators.

There are plenty of eyes on the lookout. It's fine. Even as he thought it, he caught sight of his captain, who stood across the room. Though in a light conversation with Anakin, his body language made it clear that he was still keeping a vigil watch.

See? Fives turned back to his food and took a bite. He's got it for now.

All he wanted were a few minutes to get something in his stomach and ease the tension that bit at the dip between his shoulder blades. And maybe sit down for a second or two, but Fives wasn't about to be greedy. If it comes, it comes, but this is right here is great.

He took a few more forkfuls of… whatever the sugary brown stuff was.

Everything on his plate was absolutely delicious and, if he had the skills, he would be asking for all the recipes. As it was, however, he’d been banned from every kitchen in the GAR several months ago after claiming to know how to bake an Alderaanian chocolate layer cake.

Fives was torn between smirking and grimacing at the memory.

A slight tingle rose up his throat as he swallowed his next bite, but a quick cough seemed to clear it up.

Another few bites later, Echo finally joined him.

"What took you so long?" Fives asked through a mouthful of… something. Whatever it was, it was good.

"I wanted to ask what everything was," Echo replied with a shrug. "Make sure I'm not getting something I'll end up throwing away."

Clasping a hand over his chest, Fives swallowed. "How dare you? Don't you know that there are brothers out on the field surviving on rations who would love to have—?"

An elbow sailed into his ribs and Fives broke off into a series of snickers.

"Oh, knock it off." But Echo was clearly trying to hide a smile. Fives would just be gracious enough not to point that out.

You're welcome for that, vod. You're…

The sudden thinness of the air had him reaching for a deeper breath, yet he came up short.

What the...?

A second try wasn't that much better than the first. In fact, his next intake of breath told him that if he wanted air, he wasn't going to get it where he was currently standing.

Window. That’s it, he needed a nice window.

Maybe it’s the thick crowd or…

He didn’t know. He just needed to breathe.

"Fives?" The touch of concern in Echo's voice came with a pair of furrowed brows. "Are you all right?"

"Yeah… Yeah, just…" He handed Echo his plate. "Hold this for a second and guard it with your life. I need some air."

He was halfway across the room before Echo could reply and yes, he knew it wasn't proper to run during a gathering like this, but he couldn't help it if he quickened his pace just a bit.

Fives wanted to blame the growing pit in his stomach on the food, but he’d hardly had enough time to even begin to digest yet. Still, it would've been nice to have some sort of explanation for the feeling of dread that was settling over him.

Reaching the first unoccupied window, Fives worked to find whatever lock was keeping it shut.

Come on, come on, come on.

All the while, his chest and throat seemed to be finding enjoyment in closing in on him.

Air. He needed air.

Biting out a curse, Fives resisted the urge to kick the wall and settled for banging a palm against the window frame a few times.

Come on!

"Fives, what are you doing?"

It took him longer than usual to figure out whose voice that was, but he knew it wasn't Echo's.

"Captain!" he exclaimed after a quick glance. "Do you know how these work? There's absolutely no air in here…"

His next breath was cut off halfway through by his shuddering chest and Fives struggled to suck in even half a gulp of air.

What’s wrong with me?

Rex's hands were cupped around his neck in seconds, fingers probing for his pulse.

Air, air, air, air!

"Fives, you're sweating bullets. What did you—?"

With one hand clutching at his chest and willing the tight band around it to release, Fives grabbed hold of Rex's wrist and squeezed.

"C-Captain, I can't…" He might as well have stopped sucking in breaths for all the good it was doing. Wasting energy, wasting… Air. He needed—"Breathe. Rex, I-I can't… can't breathe!" The last word barely escaped past lips that felt like they were a size or two larger than normal.

Concern practically bled from Rex's face, but Fives couldn't find the strength to care. He needed to sit down, to… to…

Strong hands guided him to the floor and he vaguely registered someone calling for Kix. Probably Rex.

Echo showed up at his side out of nowhere, though Fives couldn't care less who all was gathering to watch the show. Just so long as he still had room to breathe.

"Fives!" Someone was calling out for him. Echo…?

No, the sharp tone sounded more like Rex. Or maybe Kix…

The tingling in his throat returned, followed by an inability to swallow.

Is this what drowning feels like…?

"Stay with me, trooper!" That was Anakin, and Fives wanted so desperately to respond. Sir. Yes, sir.

I promise, I won’t let you down, sir.

But he couldn't manage a single sound other than the constant gasping that had taken over his throat.

Someone told him he was going to be okay, yet as the darkness closed in around the corners of his vision, Fives found he didn't quite believe them.

How could he be okay if he was drowning? And there’s not even any water here. How could he be okay if his body continued to shut down on him like this?

Help me. Someone please just—

The last thing he remembered before the black veil enveloped him was a hand slipping into his and squeezing, along with a single thought.

He didn't want to die.


"I hate these things. They’re always so… so boring. And everyone’s always so stuck up.”

Rex resisted the urge to roll his eyes, settling for a light smirk instead. "I think it's coming around to that time again, sir, when I should remind you that you're the one who volunteered for this mission. Very adamantly, I should add."

"Right." Anakin sighed, his gaze flitting momentarily to the chrono on the far wall. "Well, remind me about that again in another hour or two, will you? Otherwise, I might go out of my kriffing mind."

"Of course, General." Trying to keep a tight rein on his smirk, Rex cleared his throat. "Senator Amidala is right over there. You could always see what she's talking about." Isn’t that why we’re all here in the first place?

The look his general shot him made trying not to laugh more of a challenge than Rex would've liked, but there was a certain standard of conduct he had to adhere to at "these things."

Meaning, dry political summits where no one looked at you, much less spoke to you, if you weren't a visiting dignitary or senator. Or a Jedi, but Anakin didn’t seem too interested in what the politicians had to say.

Basically, if they don't think you're important enough, you don’t exist.

Rex swallowed a scoff. Some part of him had stopped letting things like that bother him a long time ago. But there was still another part that wondered what it would be like to be a natborn. To be seen as an equal by the majority of the galaxy instead of the other way around.

You have a job to do here and it doesn't include mingling with the senators.

From what he'd heard from Fox, most of them weren't worth knowing, anyway.

"Please, Rex, she's not the only reason I'm here. Besides," Anakin added, his voice more of a mumble now, "I already know what she's talking about. Politics. And she told me to…"

"What, sir?" Rex asked as Anakin's last few words were too soft to make out. " What did she tell you?"

“She told me to…”

“Sorry, sir,” Rex pressed on, letting a small smirk twist his lips, “I’m having trouble hearing you.”

"She told me to go stand somewhere else! There, happy?"

Rex couldn't suppress a smile in time, and though he knew a sudden cough wouldn't cover it, he tried for one anyway. "Maybe, and this is just a suggestion… But maybe your hovering was making her nervous. This is an important summit, after all."

No matter how much it looks like a party.

Anakin scoffed. "I do not hover. And why the heck would it make her nervous?"

Rex was about to reply when he noticed Fives out of the corner of his eye. The ARC trooper was two notches away from full-on running across the room.

Oh, great.

"Uh… Excuse me, General. I'll be right back."

Anakin must have noticed as well because his brows dipped. "Is everything okay?"

“Just Fives, sir.” Forcing a smile, one he hoped came off as reassuring, Rex muttered, "I swear, he had better not be drunk…"

"Aw, let him live a little."

Rex just raised a brow. "At a function where he's supposed to be acting as security? I don't think so, General."

"Kidding! I was kidding. When you come back, don't forget to remind me why I'm even at this kriffing summit in the first place."

"Roger that."

With a salute, Rex went to find his brother, who was trying very unsuccessfully to open one of the windows.

Something lurched inside of Rex. If Fives' somewhat erratic behavior wasn't cause for alarm, the growing rash on the back of his neck certainly was.

What the hell did he get into?

"Fives, what are you doing?" He'd said it in his best Captain voice, the one that meant the trooper in question had better start explaining—and start explaining fast.

"Captain!" Fives exclaimed before rattling off about needing to open a window, about needing air…

It was then that Rex noticed the abnormal rise and fall of Fives' chest. The way it stuttered, sucking in only half-breaths at best and never fully expanding.

He wanted to ask about the rash, to see if Fives even knew it was there, yet he found himself feeling around the trooper's neck instead.

Fives' pulse was too low, a stark contradiction to his frantic movements.

"You're sweating bullets." Rex frowned, feeling his own heart rate begin to quicken. "What did you—?"

When Fives grabbed hold of his wrist, Rex couldn't help but jolt. Something was terribly wrong and the worst of it was, he had no idea what.

Which means you don't know how to fix it.

He was the ori'vod, he was supposed to fix it.

Come on, Fives. Talk to me…

"C-Captain, I can't…"

Breathe. The revelation struck Rex to the core and he cursed himself for being so slow to realize. Fives couldn't breathe.

"Easy, Fives. Easy," he soothed, his voice exuding a calm he didn't feel as he helped Fives sit down. The ARC was swaying far too much for Rex's tastes. "Hold on, you're gonna be okay. I promise."

Fives didn't respond, his eyelids fluttering as if locked in a desperate struggle to stay open. All the while, his chest heaved and he gasped for air.

Scanning the room, Rex called out, "Kix! Kix, get over here! I need a medic!"

The room could have very well descended into chaos after that, but several troopers jumped in and began working as crowd control. Good work, boys.

Almost out of nowhere, Kix appeared, sliding in front of Fives’ shuddering frame.

"Symptoms?" he barked, whipping out his scanner and wasting no time in examining his vod.

"Can't breathe, sweaty, and there's a weird rash climbing up his neck."

Kix's expression was grim. "Anaphylactic shock," he bit out. "We need to get him back to the ship or to the nearest medical facility now or—"

He cut off as Echo joined them, his face pinched with worry. "What's happening to him?"

"Fives!" Kix shouted, shaking the man and smacking his cheek to get his eyes to open again. When they did, Fives' stare was glazed and unfocused.

"Or what?" Rex pressed as he clasped Kix's arm. "What, Kix?"

The medic's expression was grim. "Or else we'll lose him."

Anakin knelt beside Rex just then and the captain didn't doubt he'd heard Kix's grave diagnosis.

“How much time does he have?” he asked.

Rex’s stomach flipped when Kix shook his head. “Not nearly enough. Less than fifteen minutes from when it first started.”

Anakin turned back to Fives’ fading form. "Stay with me, trooper!" he ordered, scooping the ARC into his arms.

Rex stumbled to his feet on legs that wouldn't stop shaking.

Fix it, fix it! You have to fix it!

Anaphylactic shock. Rex didn't even know the first thing about fixing something like that.

Which meant he had to rely on Kix.

Which meant he couldn't fix it.

Fives hadn't even been an ARC trooper for two months yet.

There's so many things he hasn't done, so many experiences he hasn't—

Numb feet followed Kix and Anakin out of the room. Somewhere in the background of the chaos that was his mind, Echo was asking what happened.

I don't know.

Rex swallowed with great difficulty.

I don't know…

All he knew was that Fives couldn't die.

Not yet.

Not his vod'ika.

Not now. Please, not now…

Please, let him be okay.

Chapter 2

Notes:

(See the end of the chapter for notes.)

Chapter Text

Rex said it was anaphylactic shock. He’d dropped that bombshell seconds before disappearing into the medbay with Fives and Anakin.

Anaphylactic shock.

Echo shivered. Once upon another time, he'd seen the very same thing happen to a fellow cadet. The Kaminoans never told any of those unfortunate enough to witness the scene what could possibly have caused something like that.

And the cadet was never seen again.

He didn't even have a name yet…

Another shiver clawed at his frame and he glanced about the waiting room. Rex was talking in low tones to another medic and something in his expression told Echo to stay away for the time being.

He probably has all the same questions you have, only he's actually got the nerve to find answers.

All you're doing is just sitting here. Useless…

Closing his eyes for a brief moment, Echo sucked in a breath. It didn't steady him as much as he thought it would, but at least it was something. Even if he lives, he's a dead man walking.

Swallowing, Echo forced himself to take another deep breath. You don't know that.

Yeah? What about that cadet? Where do you think he is right now?

Another breath did absolutely nothing, but still, Echo tried.

That was back on Kamino. Things are different here.

Are they, really?

For once, he wasn't so sure. There wasn't anything in the reg manuals about this.

Maybe because it's not supposed to happen.

And on Kamino, when something was out of the ordinary, it was never heard of again—or talked about. Ever.

Anaphylactic shock.

What even causes that?

It had all happened so fast and seemingly out of nowhere. Fives had been fine.

Fives was fine…

Then, before Echo could even take a bite of his own food, the room had erupted into chaos and it was all he could do to find somewhere to set their plates before rushing to his brother’s side. Because Force forbid you just dump them on the floor and make a run for it, right?

Fives would've done that. He wouldn't have cared about what anyone thought, about making a mess.

He only would've cared about you.

Playing the scene over in his head more than a dozen times, Echo found several ways he could've gotten to Fives sooner. If he'd only questioned it when Fives said he needed air. If he'd only gone with Fives to the window, maybe he could've helped somehow.

If he had only paid more attention… Then maybe he could've figured out what caused it all in the first place.

Now, his only surviving batchmate was battling death behind a door that had been glaring at Echo for ages, daring him to even try to enter.

Please, let him be okay. Please…

And what if he is? What if he ends up being fine and this happens again?

When Echo took a breath this time around, no air came.

You know it goes. Defects get decommissioned.

B-But, it's not a defect. It's just…

What?

Gasping didn't seem to do anything to fill his lungs either, so Echo stopped trying. It was easier to stay still, anyway. If he stayed like that long enough, maybe he would pass out and they would take him into the emergency room with Fives. At least that way, they could be together…

It's just… Just a medical emergency. Troopers get wounded all the time.

It's okay, it's... it's normal.

The cynical part of his brain frowned at him and Echo forced himself not to shiver under its beady glare. What happened to Fives didn't look normal to me, now did it?

It was just as he began banishing the voice to the depths that he noticed someone calling his name.

I'm here, I'm… I just…

Just what?

Just can't breathe…

Just like Fives—

What if I die, too?

Fives is not going to die—

"Echo!" A very blurry Rex filled his vision, but Echo couldn't remember how to focus on him. His eyes were working just about as well as his lungs. "You need to breathe right now."

When exactly his arm had moved, Echo couldn't say, but it was now pressed against someone's chest. Probably Rex.

"That's an order." The captain's voice wasn't loud, but it was sharp, leaving no room for argument.

And it was a touch worried, too. Maybe more than a touch…

It was the steady rise and fall of Rex's chest against his hand that reminded Echo what it felt like to breathe, and eventually, he began pumping air into his lungs again.

The relief it brought made him almost lightheaded.

"There," Rex sighed and his face finally came into view. "That's it. I don't need two ARC troopers in the emergency room tonight."

Though there was a thin ring of humor around his tone, Echo couldn't bring himself to return his captain's smile.

"Is he…?" Echo swallowed, finding the motion easier now that his lungs were working again. "Did they say if he's all right yet?"

"I just got a message from the general," Rex replied, his smile still laced with a grim edge. "It sounds like he'll pull through. It's you I'm concerned about at the moment, though. Are you okay?"

Though he felt himself nod, the voice began snaking its way back into his head.

He's all right now, sure, but what about later? What happens when they find out he's defective?

"I'll…" Echo cleared his throat, willing his tone to sound normal. "I'll be fine." When Rex raised a brow, clearly skeptical, Echo heaved a sigh. "Just… Can you…? Do you think you can promise me something?"

Rex's brows dipped. "What is it?"

"Promise me that he'll be okay. I… I-I need him to be okay."

"I just told you he's going to be all right," Rex responded, still seeming confused. "And once we get the 'All Clear' from Kix, you can go in to see him."

"No, I mean…" Sucking in a breath, Echo forced his eyes not to close; forced himself not to retreat into the simpler world of darkness. "I mean, after. After all this. You're a captain, you have power. You have the general's ear. M-Maybe you can convince them to… to…"

Only when he felt Rex's hands close around his own did he realize they were trembling.

Stop that, you’re fine.

"Echo, listen to me." And maybe it was Echo's frayed nerves, but it sounded like Rex was fighting to hold himself together. "No one is going to take Fives away. That… That doesn't happen anymore."

"B-But… What happened back there… I've seen it before and… I know what it means. Fives… he's… he's defective now, isn't he?"

"He's not defective. And he's gonna be just fine, all right?"

As Rex squeezed his hands, Echo took a moment to calm himself, to really study his captain. The man looked worn, like he was holding himself and this whole situation together by a single thread. But most importantly…

Echo sucked in another ragged breath. "You know," he said, failing in his attempt at a chuckle, "it'd be a lot easier to believe that, sir, if you sounded like you believed it."

Rex blinked at that, clearly startled and trying desperately to hide the fact, and if it weren't for a few thin cracks in his mask, he would've made it.

"I not only believe it," Rex said after a minute, his voice solemn, "I promise it. Don't worry. Nothing's going to happen to him. Now…" Somehow, the captain managed a smile. "You need to promise me that you'll keep breathing, and that's an order."

If Rex could somehow muster a smile, then so could he. Echo felt his lips twitch upward as he nodded. "Yes, sir."

"Good." Giving Echo knee a pat, Rex stood. "I'm sure it won't be long now."

Nodding once more, Echo breathed a sigh and leaned back in his chair as his captain rejoined the medic on the other side of the small waiting room.

And he forced himself not to panic. There's no need for that anymore.

Rex said it's gonna be fine. He promised.

Still… If he could only stop seeing the scene in his mind. Fives on the floor gasping for air, then losing consciousness. The general carrying him out of the room and Kix on the verge of losing his voice as he barked orders. And Rex sporting that terrifying expression of sheer panic.

How can he look so calm now?

How in the stars does he do it?

Not for the first time, Echo was glad to be a part of Torrent Company. Maybe he could learn a thing or two from his superiors.

Maybe.

In that moment, however, all he wanted was for Fives to be all right.

Is that too much to ask?


Fives hadn't expected to wake up, yet, much to his surprise and confusion, he found himself blinking the medbay into view.

The room was small, the kind he'd only been in a handful of times before—as a patient. As a visitor… more times than he could count. He had watched brothers recover in rooms like this one, and he'd watched them die, too.

For a moment, he wondered why he was even there. Would there be anyone to watch him recover?

What…?

Or would Echo have to watch him—

Die.

Why didn't I...?

"There you are." Kix's voice sliced through the blur in his mind and Fives blinked again, glancing up as the head medic came into view. "I honestly thought I was going to lose you for a minute back there."

"What—?" A cough broke him off and with it came the memories.

The summit. The buffet.

The window.

Rex.

"Can't breathe…"

Drowing.

"Here." Kix handed him a cup of water. "Take it easy for a second or two. Then I'll answer your questions."

After a sip and only a handful of seconds, Fives cleared his throat. "Didn't I…? Wait, so… what happened?"

Didn't I drown, somehow?

How could you possibly drown on dry land, idiot?

"You went into anaphylactic shock," Kix explained, thumbing through something on his datapad and shrugging. "So, I had to save you. Again."

"What, again?" Fives scrunched his nose. "When was the last time?"

Kix gave him a look that screamed unamused. "Remember Felucia?"

"Point made. But… why?"

"Because you and Echo thought you could befriend the wildlife and I—"

"No, no, no!" Fives waved a dismissive hand. "No, we don't need to relive that. I mean, why anaphylactic shock?"

"Because you're allergic to Faerrellan tree nuts, di'kut. That's why." Scrolling through his pad again, Kix added, "And maybe a handful of other kinds of nuts, but I don't have that data back yet."

"Allergic?" Over the sound of the dull buzz that was growing in his ears, Fives heard himself scoff. "That can't be right. That… That can't be possible. Something like that isn't in our DNA."

"Well, it's in yours." Flipping the datapad around, Kix showed Fives a couple pages of statistics explaining the hidden defect. "You just didn't know it because you've never been to Faerrell before and the food diversity on Kamino was less than stellar."

Hidden defect. Kix hadn't said it, but the words tumbled around in Fives' head all the same. That's what it is, isn't it? Something out of the ordinary. Something that doesn't align with your perfect DNA.

A defect.

Perfect DNA…

"Just as you were created with flawless genetics, we expect you to adhere to a similar standard of excellence when it comes to your skills, training, and behavior. Is that clear, cadets?"

"We are only training the best of the best here on Kamino. Anyone found to be less than perfect will be given a… different purpose."

"Different purpose." A young clone scoffed to his batchmate, his voice a low mutter. "Why don't they just come out and say it?"

"CT-5555, do you have something to say?"

"No sir. Of course not, sir…"

" Good. "

Less than perfect.

Hidden defect.

Different purpose…

"Fives."

Decommissioning.

"Fives"

Death.

"Fives!" Kix's hand was on his shoulder and it reminded him that he needed to breathe. "Come on, don't do this to me again."

"Right," Fives gasped, sucking in mouthfuls of air like it was water in a desert. "Right, sorry. Sorry, I'm… Just lost in thought for a second, I'm… I'm fine."

Though Kix didn't look convinced, he nodded.

"So," Fives began, cutting the medic off before he could say anything, "what am I supposed to do about it?"

"Well, stay away from Faerrellan nuts, for starters. When the test results come back from the lab, we'll know what other foods you have to avoid. I'm also going to give you an applicator with medicine in it that will keep this from happening again, even if you do end up having another allergic reaction. The main point of stress came in the fact that no one knew what was happening to you, so now that we know the source, we can take measures to ensure none of this ever happens again."

Though Fives nodded, he found himself only absorbing every other word or so as he fought to keep his mind from running away from him again.

You're okay. You're fine. You're not dead, so just focus on that for now.

Right. Yeah.

Okay…

And breathe.

Sure…

Except now he had a hidden defect when all this time he'd thought he was perfect, and now nothing was going to be the same and—

Inhale, exhale.

Inhale…

The door swooshed open and Rex walked in. Though the captain was clearly trying to hide it, Fives had never seen anyone look so relieved.

"Good to have you back with us," he said, smiling.

"Good to be back, sir." Fives tried to match his smile, but he could tell it fell short.

"If you're good to sit with him for a bit," Kix began, "I think I'll go and check on those test results."

Test results.

Fives almost cringed, but he forced himself to remain composed. You've already made enough of a scene already, don't you think?

Rex sent Kix away with a reassuring smile and a wave, leaving the two alone in the small med room.

Hiddendefecthiddendefecthidden—

"Fives?"

Glancing up, he watched Rex take a seat in the chair beside his bed, brows slightly knit.

"Sorry. Zoned out, I guess. How did the rest of the summit go?"

"I'm actually not sure," Rex replied with a soft chuckle. "I haven't been back yet."

Oh.

"General Skywalker?" Because he remembered the general being right there when thought he was dyi—

"I convinced him to check in with the rest of Torrent planetside. He didn't want to, but we couldn't both be up here. Not with Commander Tano back on Coruscant this time around."

Planetside… Of course, they were back on the Resolute.

All you had to do was stand there and be security and you couldn't even do that. How did you end up becoming an ARC again…?

Fives licked his lips. They felt normal now, not swollen like before. He could actually swallow properly, too, now. And breathe… He could breathe now…

"And Echo?"

Rex grinned a bit at this. "Your recovery was taking longer than expected, so I sent him off in search of snacks and caf. He'll be back soon." With a sigh, he studied Fives. "How are you feeling?"

"Exhausted." Fives blew out a breath. "But glad to be alive. I had no idea what was happening to me."

"Well, that makes two of us." Though Rex looked like he wanted to say something else, he settled for a soft smile. "I'm just glad you're okay."

"That definitely makes two of us."

Hiddendefecthiddendefecthid—

He needed to find another distraction for his brain, another topic that would take his mind off the looming dread, but he'd run out of questions for Rex.

Still, he heard himself speak, then immediately cursed his frazzled brain. "So… How did the rest of the summit go?"

Rex stared at him. "You already asked that."

"Oh. Yeah… yeah, I guess I did…"

Hiddendefecthidden—

"What happens now?" The question sounded more abrupt than he'd intended. He had wanted to ease into the topic, but his mind and mouth had other ideas.

"I'm sure Kix will go through everything with you, if he hasn't already."

"Yeah, he did that. I mean, what happens now?"

The flicker in Rex's eyes told Fives the exact second his captain caught on.

Yeah… Yeah, we’re gonna have that talk, vod.

Sighing, Rex leaned forward in his chair, arms resting on his knees. "I just went through this with Echo a little bit ago. This isn't Kamino. The only thing that's gonna happen to you is you're going to learn how to adapt to this allergy, then ship out with us on our next campaign like normal."

Fives scoffed, gaze shifting to a vague spot just over Rex's shoulder. "You're honestly going to sit there all calm like that and expect me to believe you? I know what happens to clones with defects. I've seen it. When something isn't up to standard, isn't perfect, it disappears. Defective clones disappear."

His voice had risen considerably and the exertion had taken more out of him than he'd thought. Slumping back against his pillow, Fives let his eyes slip closed for a moment. Just a moment…

"Not all of them." Rex's words were so quiet, Fives almost missed them. Yeah, right. "If they perform well, live up to their training, and follow orders like they’re supposed to, they tend to stick around. Well, some of them do, anyway."

Opening his eyes, Fives turned to his brother, still feeling the sharp claws of doom slowly pierce his soul.

"Right, sure. On what planet?"

He hadn't expected Rex to chuckle and the dry, mirthless sound shook him. "I'm still here, aren't I?" Fives just blinked. What the...? "I think if I could make it this far, you've got nothing to worry about."

He felt his eyes scan Rex several times over, searching for even the slightest imperfection and coming up empty at every turn.

Another dry chuckle had Rex pointing at his hair. Fives was most definitely not in the mood to have his mind blown, thank you very much.

"No… But, wait…" He blinked again, trying to make sense of what he'd just heard. "No, wait, you… You dye it, don't you? Come on, you totally dye it."

"I tried that once or twice," Rex explained, his shrug a forced sort of casual. "Once because I thought it would fix things, twice because I was desperate, but… I learned quickly that my skin doesn't react well to hair dye. In the end, it wasn't worth the pain just to fit in." Another shrug had Rex leaning back in his chair once more. "Would've made things easier, though, but that's beside the point."

There was so much to unpack in that statement, but Fives was still trying to wrap his head around the unexpected revelation. The overexaggerated nonchalance told him that his captain's indifference was just a facade and he wanted more than anything to ask about it. Instead, Fives shook his head in awe.

"I never would've known…"

Rex's smile was a bit more genuine this time around. "Exactly. You get to pick who knows, Fives, and whoever happens to find out won't think any less of you because of it. It might not be something you chose, but at least it's something you can control."

Right. Though he supposed it was meant to, that didn't make Fives feel much better. Not when the threats ingrained in him on Kamino still lingered at the back of his mind like a dark storm cloud threatening to break. Sure…

"But we're supposed to be perfect. We were created to be perfect. "

"That's a pretty high standard, don't you think? Kind of impossible, if you ask me. Even if you were genetically flawless, there's still personality to consider, and not all of the choices we make are going to be 'perfect.' Actually, most of them aren't. And there's a lot more vode with minor defects than you might think who are still around. At least yours is invisible."

"At least yours can't kill you."

"All right," Rex chuckled. "I'll give you that one."

Fives wanted to say more, to ask which clones with defects Rex knew that he didn't. To tell the captain that his blond hair absolutely rocked and Fives couldn't imagine him any other way. To pour out all the nagging fears that continued to nibble at his mind and have Rex tell him over and over again that yes, it was all going to be okay.

But the door slid open before he could get his mouth working and Echo's voice filled the room.

"Why didn't you tell me he was awake?" Discarding his snacks and caf on a chair near the door, Echo dashed over to the bed. "How are you feeling? Are you all right? Do you need anything? Oh, and if you ever scare me like that again, I’ll murder you."

Obviously trying to hide a smirk, Rex cleared his throat. "I'll go see if Kix has those results back."

"You mean, you're gonna leave me all alone in here with him?" Fives joked, earning a light punch to the arm from Echo. "He'll suffocate me with all his worrying!"

"Sorry," Rex smirked, "but that doesn't really sound like my problem."

“But he literally just said he was going to murder me!”

Rex just gave a shrug that practically screamed You’re on your own, sorry not sorry.

"Hey, Captain," Fives called out just as Rex reached the door. "Thank you."

"It's nothing. I'll be back soon with Kix and those results."

"No, I mean," Fives pressed, taking a breath and smiling, "thanks."

With a knowing smile of his own, Rex nodded. "You're welcome."

Notes:

I think I might do some sort of an epilogue at some point, but first, I need to proofread and post the first chapter of my Zygerria from Rex’s POV fic and start working on a Wolffe story I’ve been tossing around for a hot min minute.

Thank you to all who commented on the last chapter! It means a lot to hear from everyone who’s enjoying this story. :)

Notes:

Part two should be up soon! If you enjoyed this story, I’d love to hear from you!

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