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All I Think About Is You

Summary:

When you have all the same friends, it’s really hard to avoid your ex. It’s been two months and Skye and Ward are still trying to find their new balance. They run into each other at Fitzsimmons’ engagement party and begin to reconnect. They clearly still have deep feelings for one another, but how do they either move on or find a way to move past their problems?

Notes:

I have a major weakness for domestic Skyeward and all the heart eyes. I found a post-breakup prompt and it was perfect. Little did I know it would turn into a multi-chapter story. But I am so glad it did.

Most especial thanks to my favoritest Evie for helping me move forward and link things together and in all, not give up.

Chapter Text

 photo _breakup au _2.png

She wasn’t really feeling up to going out tonight, and any other night, she would have bailed. But it was her best friends’ engagement party, so how could she not be there? Especially since she is going to be the Maid of Honor. At least it was going to be a casual event at their favorite bar, that meant she didn't have to dress up. So, after a quick run of the brush through her hair and a little mascara, she was out the door.

"Skye!" came the excited squeal from across the room.

"Hi Jems," she greeted her friend, giving her a hug.

Fitz kissed her on the cheek. "Hey Skye. Glad you could make it."

"Of course. I couldn't miss my best friends' engagement party," she said as she plastered on the biggest grin she could muster. Fitz raised his eyebrow at her in that quiet way that told her he knew exactly how hard it was for her to come.

"Oh Fitz, why wouldn't she be here?" Jemma tittered. "Come on, Skye. Let's introduce you to some of my colleagues."

Jemma dragged Skye over the group of scientists and made introductions. She made small talk with them for awhile, as more people joined the party. She was in the middle of explaining the details of migrating data from a local server to the cloud, when the energy of the room changed around her. Just like that she knew he was here. Hearing Jemma shriek and Fitz shout was unnecessary; she always knows when he is near. But knowing that didn't mean she was ready to deal with seeing him, not tonight, so she excused herself and slipped away to the restroom.

She spent as much time as she can get away with in there. She fixed her hair about a dozen times, scrolled through her phone, and dreamed up a million excuses to leave early. Do you think Jemma would accept Skye coming down with mumps? Somehow she guessed the biochemist would sniff out the truth rather easily, even if she was firmly entrenched in engagement euphoria. While she cycled through the possibilities, there was a knock on the door and Bobbi's voice came floating through.

"Are you okay in there, Skye?"

"Yeah. I'll be out in a second."

"Really? Because you've been in here for 15 minutes already. You sure you're okay?"

The door unlocked and she beckoned her friend to come in. Bobbi immediately took in the shadows under the younger girl's eyes and the grimace masquerading as a smile.

"Yeah, no way are you okay. What's going on, hon?"

"It's just...." Skye trailed off and looked around the room, as if the soap dispenser would have all the answers to her problems. "He's here and I just don't think I can do this."

"Ahhh," Bobbi nodded in understanding. "But you've seen him in the last couple months. What makes tonight different?"

"I don't know. It's stupid. I need to just be a grownup."

"If you're this upset, it's not stupid. Come on, tell me."

Skye sighed and closed her eyes, to gather herself. “Yes, I’ve seen him other times. But….we were supposed to come to this together,” she whispered. “Today was just a crappy day with one thing after another and now he’s here and I don’t think I can go out and face him. I knew he was going to be here, we’re the Maid of Honor and Best Man after all. But, I just didn’t think… I don’t know what I thought. Not that it matters anyway; he obviously isn’t worried about it.”

“Oh honey, come here.” Bobbi wrapped her up in a hug. “Sweetie, I know it hurts. But you can do this. This is about Jemma and Fitz, remember? Go out there and have a good time, even if he’s around. You guys said you would stay friends, right?”

Skye sniffled, “Yeah, we did. Okay fine, you win.”

“Good girl. And if it gets to be too much, you just give me the signal and I’ll get Lance to cause a huge distraction and we’ll sneak you out. You know how much he loves causing a scene.”

Skye chuckled, “I appreciate it. But I’m going to hold you to that. Get that drama queen of yours ready to perform.”

“You got it, rock star. Now, come on. It's time to go congratulate the most sickeningly sweet, so-perfect-it-makes-your-teeth-hurt couple to ever walk the face of the earth.”

 

On the other side of the bar, Ward was laughing at a story Fitz was telling to the group. But it didn’t escape his attention when Skye and Bobbi walked back into the room. He had seen her disappear as soon as he arrived, but as much as he wanted to, he knew it wasn’t his place to check on her anymore. He tried to focus on the conversation around him, interjecting where it worked, but his eyes still drifted over to the brunette every couple minutes. She was smiling and chatting, just like he’d expect, but there was something missing. The light just wasn’t reaching her eyes like he was used to. And then he noticed it. It was that shirt; the purple and blue flannel that she had owned for more years than he had known her. The one that she only wore when she was upset and needed something comforting. His heart sunk at that realization. What was upsetting her so much? As much as he would like to think it was about him, that wouldn’t be it. She was the one who ended things, she was moving on, so there had to be another cause. He wanted to know (he wanted to make it better), but he couldn’t just ask. Normally, he would see if Fitz or Jemma knew what was going on, but it was their special night and he didn’t want to detract from their celebration by bringing up someone else’s problems. So, he kept it to himself and just continued to observe her from afar.

 

Skye was doing her best to socialize and chat with everyone. It was nice to see some of her old friends again, people she hadn’t seen in a few years. But, of course, they wanted to know how she was and what she had been up to in a time since they had last seen her. It was easy to talk about her job and the new apartment she had moved into, but it was much harder to explain what was going on in her personal life. She just gave a tight smile and said she was fine on her own. A couple of them knew that she and Grant had been together, but luckily, didn’t prod for details when it became obvious that was no longer the case. The idea of Hunter causing a disruption so she could escape was sounding more appealing by the minute, but she decided to grab another drink before giving Bobbi the signal and high-tailing it out of there. There was no line at the bar, so she quickly walked over and ordered another beer. As she waited, she turned to view the party. The happy couple practically glowed as their friends and colleagues congratulated them. The story of the proposal was being told for the 17th or 18th time, but even Skye couldn’t hold that against them. Jemma and Fitz deserved this time to shine and bask in their love for each other. Not to mention, that rock on Jemma’s left hand was catching plenty of attention on its own. But being around all the joy and affection was a little more than her heart could take in that moment. She grabbed the beer bottle and slipped outside to the patio area.

It was mostly empty, with just a few people sitting at the tables. She leaned up against the railing, looking out at the view of the bay. It was the most peaceful time of day, just after sunset, when the stars were just beginning to twinkle and it felt like there could be magic in the air. Skye let her thoughts run wild and lost herself in memories of the climbing tree at the orphanage, where she had spent many evenings just like this; by herself, imagining life with a family. She was so wrapped up in the nostalgia, she didn’t hear him approach, had no idea he was even there until he cleared his throat.

“Sorry, I didn’t mean to startle you,” he immediately said, upon seeing her jump.

“Uh, it’s okay, don’t worry about it.” She turned back to the view, not really sure what else to say.

Ward came to stand beside her. Not in her space but a couple feet away, also leaning against the railing. The silence continued for a couple of moments, while each of them tried desperately to figure out what to do next.

Skye’s instincts were telling her to run, that it was too painful, too scary to stay and risk whatever he had to say. It didn't matter that she was the one who told him to go, her heart still ached for him. It was still recovering, still trying to mend itself from where it had been scraped raw. If she stayed here, so close to him, she wasn't sure she could stop herself from blurting out that it was all a mistake. But she couldn’t let herself do that either. Because no matter how much she missed him, things hadn’t changed. Her anger was still there, buried under her sadness, but still smoldering over his lack of trust in her, his determination to stop her, his unwillingness to see that maybe it would be different for her than it was for him. Nothing had really changed. Except it appeared he was doing okay without her, he was getting on with his life. She wasn’t going to be the one to throw a fire bomb into this tenuous peace they had reached; that wasn’t fair to him. So running, to keep her mouth shut, seemed like the best option. Yet something was keeping her here, at least for now.

He could read the tension in her body so clearly, she might as well have had a neon sign over her head flashing, “I’m uncomfortable!” He saw the way she was just barely touching the railing, poised to fly away at a moment’s notice. And he knew he had to be careful with this moment, or he would spook her entirely, which was the exact opposite of what he wanted to do. What he really wanted was to gather her in his arms, tell her he loved her, find out what was bothering her so much, and fix it. What he wanted was to apologize for his rigidity and taking out his fear on her. What he wanted, what he always wanted, was to protect her from anything and anyone that would hurt her. But she had made it clear, she didn’t need his protection. She could take care of herself and she wanted to. She could handle things without him swooping in and rescuing her. She was no damsel in distress and did not appreciate being treated like one. So he stayed quiet, waiting for her to make to the first move.

The minutes passed quietly, with the hum of the party inside behind them, and the water in front of them lapping at the shore. It was almost comforting that they're able to be near each other like this. It reminded her of all those moments together, just hanging out on the couch at his place, him reading a book and her on the laptop. Nothing rushed or crazy between them, just the companionable silence between people who knew each other in their bones.

The music drifting out from the bar took on a different sound. What can only be described as caterwauling was heard by everyone.

She giggled softly, almost as if she didn’t want him to hear. They both knew exactly what that sound was.

“Damn Hunter. Bobbi let him near the karaoke mic again,” he chuckled. “You would think she’d learn by now to hide it from him at all costs.”

“I think she has learned to pick her battles. He is totally insufferable if he doesn’t get to sing. I wouldn’t want to go home with a pouting Lance either.”

“Yeah, but the rest of us now have to suffer too. She’d be doing a public service by stopping him.”

She rolled her eyes, but the smile remained on her face.

Seizing the opportunity, since she wasn't running, he pressed forward in the conversation, “How has work been lately? Did you finish that big project?”

Her mouth twisted into a scowl. “Yes, but that turned into a giant cluster.”

“What happened?”

She realized her mistake in telling him more details and tried to smooth it over. “Don't worry about it. It's not a big deal. It's all done now.’

He raised an eyebrow at her deflection. “Really? You've only been working on that project for 4 months, but it's not a big deal that something went wrong?”

“It's fine, really. Nothing I can do about it now,” she sighed resignedly.

He tried again, more gently this time. “Come on, Skye. Tell me what’s really going on.”

“I…..What makes you say that?”

He leaned forward and tucked a stray piece of hair behind her ear. Her breath caught and she looked up at him. “Skye, I see the shirt you’re wearing. You only pull that out when you’re really upset, at least for wearing it in public. What is bothering you?”

She closed her eyes and turned her head away. It still caught her off guard how well he could read her, how thoroughly he knew her and all her tells. “It's just been a rough week.”

She knew it would be impossible now to brush him off, he would know, but that didn’t mean she wanted to tell him everything. It wasn’t like she could just come out and say, I feel like I’m torn in half because you’re not there anymore. So that was out. And after everything that happened there was absolutely zero chance she would tell him a single thing about her search. He had proven he couldn’t handle that and no way was she opening that up to him. That basically left telling him about the problems at work.

“You know about that project I was working on. I was almost finished with it, only had a couple things left. But they were tricky to figure out, so I asked Brandon for some help, you know my whole pieces-solving-a-puzzle philosophy. It was going great, he got me through a couple roadblocks, I was almost finished. Sandy dropped a couple other things on me, that needed to be dealt with right away. So I put the project aside while I did those. The next day I came in, ready to finish, only to find that Brandon had finished it and turned it in to Sandy, taking all the credit for it. Not only did he get praised for all the work that I had done, but now I look like the incompetent loser who couldn’t hack it and needed him to come in and save the day. I hate looking like I couldn’t handle it on my own!”

“What a bastard,” came the taut reply. He knew how much she hated being treated like that and she deserved every bit of credit for that project. He had a suspicion that there was more to the story than she was giving, but he was pretty sure that what she could use more than anything was a laugh. “Tell you what. Sunday night, let’s go find his car and we’ll put cover it in shaving cream. Or saran wrap it. Or both! We can go the whole 9 yards. Maple syrup under the door handles, Oreos stuck all over the windows, then saran wrap around the whole thing, and shaving cream on top. He’ll be hours late for work, if he ever makes it in at all.”

He was rewarded by the first genuine snicker he’d heard from her all night. And since he desperately wanted to keep hearing that, he piled on even more. “We’ll fork his lawn and snap off all the handles so it’s even harder to get them all out. A good old fashioned TPing is always a great option. Maybe we can even do the flaming bag of dog crap as the finishing touch.” She was full on guffawing now and it was exactly what he wanted to see. The light was finally back in her eyes and it took his breath away, how gorgeous she looked like that. He was about to reach for her when a loud crash and some rather impressive profanity grabbed their attention.

Lance, having finished his karaoke performance, was now losing a fight with a patio chair. It somehow twisted up his legs and pinned him down at the same time.

“Bloody, cheap American furniture! Where did they even get this?”

“Need some help there, Lance?” Skye called over, amusement all over her face.

“If it wouldn’t be too much trouble, love.”

Skye walked over and hoisted the chair off the unlucky Brit. Ward stretched out his hand to help him up as well. “What were you even trying to do, Hunter?”

“Well, T-1000, I’ll have you know I was coming out here to tell you both it was time for toasts. Your presence is required, seeing as you two are the Best Man and Maid of Honor. But if you have something better to be doing, by all means, don’t let me stop you.” His wink made Skye’s face pale considerably.

“Uhhh….no, it’s fine. I’ll go see what Jemma needs right now,” she stammered and quickly ran inside.

Ward groaned a little to himself, “Thanks Hunter. Way to freak her out.”

“Don’t blame me! You were the one out here making heart eyes at her,” he defended. But then his voice grew serious. “Ward, buddy, you gotta be careful. She’s not doing nearly as well as she tries to make it seem. She’s hurting a lot more than she wants to admit.”

“You think I don’t see that?” he asked angrily.

“Just...don’t play with her, okay? Let her move on. Or at least give her the space to try, that’s all I’m saying.” Hunter held up his hands in defeat.

Ward pressed his lips into a thin line as he thought on Lance’s words. Should he just leave her alone? Can they be friends, right now or ever? Does he even stand a chance at winning her back? He felt no closer to the answers than he did two weeks ago. He shook his head and decided to put it off until after the party was over. His heart was a mess and his mind couldn’t take any more of it tonight. So he put it aside and went back in to celebrate his friends’ happiness. But he kept thinking of the way a certain pair of eyes had twinkled when he talked about forking a lawn, and somehow that was enough to buoy him through the evening.

Chapter 2

Summary:

Skye and Ward both reflect on their moment together at the engagement party, as well as the history of their relationship. They think back to both the beginning (the night they meet) and the end (the breakup). And where that leaves them now.

Notes:

This chapter is the longest, but probably my favorite. There is a lot of backstory revealed here and the full spectrum of emotions. I hope you enjoy it as much as I do!

Chapter Text

Finally. She was at home, in her sweats, curled up in bed, and nothing else expected from her until Monday morning. Maybe by then she will have sorted through the insane mess that was her head at the moment. Maybe. She wasn't holding her breath, considering the last two months hadn't seemed to help with that. Adding in the drama at work this week and hitting yet another dead end in her search for her parents, and Skye was needing some real comfort. Normally, Jemma would be at the top of the list to call, but she was enjoying her weekend with Fitz. Skye didn't want to interrupt that precious time for the happy couple. Her emotional mess would still be there later. Calling Bobbi crossed her mind as well, but Hunter had gotten pretty drunk at the party (how do you even lose a fight to a chair?) so she knew Bobbi had her hands full. It was too late to call anyone else, not that there was really anyone else she'd be willing to open up to. Well, there was one person, but she was staunchly refusing to admit that the only time she'd felt that ache in her heart ease, at all, was when he made her laugh with suggestions of obnoxious pranks. Admitting that would mean admitting he could still make things better and that didn't help when he was the biggest part of the problem.

She flopped back on her pillows and closed her eyes, hoping to stave off the tears. But all she saw behind her eyelids was his smile, all she heard was his laugh, all she felt was the warmth of his hands as he tucked back her hair. She sensed every fiber in her body calling out for him. This bed was too big without him in it. The pillow didn't even smell like him anymore. She looked around the room, but his ghost was lurking everywhere. The scent of his shampoo in the bathroom, the light from the hallway when he'd get up first to make coffee, the sweetness of the popcorn they'd share while watching a movie (he convinced her to try kettlecorn and now she'd never go back to salted), the kiss on her cheek right before she would fall asleep. The angry words they yelled and the tears that were shed the last time she saw him in here.

“Don’t you understand that this is important to me? That I deserve to find them? I have wondered about them my entire life. Why don’t I get to know them?” she cried, wishing he would just understand.

“Why do you want to? They left. Why would you want to find them? What could they possibly do for you?” He hadn’t raised his voice, but there was an edge to it that she’d become all too familiar with lately.

“They could tell me WHY,” she said exasperated. “They could tell me if they didn’t want me or I was taken or if they had a choice. They could tell me about where I came from and what their lives are like now.”

He rolled his eyes. “Are you sure you want to know? What if they are terrible people? What if they gave you up because they didn’t care? What if you were an inconvenience to them and you’re just going to cause problems by showing up now?”

“GAH! Ward, just because your family was a modern version of the Lannisters, doesn’t mean mine is too! What if they have been searching for me? What if they want to know me?”

“That’s a great story, Skye. But let’s be real. If they wanted to know you, how did you end up in that orphanage in the first place? Why haven’t they shown up yet?”

Her eyes narrowed at him. “How. Dare. You. You don’t know a freaking thing about why any of this happened.”

“Neither do you,” his tone just as even and icy. “And you shouldn’t mess around with things you know nothing about.”

“What?! You did NOT just say that! Things I don’t know about?! FUCK YOU, GRANT WARD!” He didn’t even see the book before it flew past his shoulder and hit the wall behind him.

“Geez Skye!”

“You know what? I can’t do this anymore. I just can’t. You clearly don’t trust me to think for myself. I’m just…..done.” Skye sunk down on the bed and wouldn’t even look at him.

“Okay, let’s take a break, go get some food.”

“No,” she said quietly but urgently. She looked him straight in the eye. “I can’t do this anymore. I can’t have this fight over and over again. We’re getting nowhere. We haven’t for months. Aren’t you exhausted?”

He looked genuinely scared now. “What are you saying?” he asked slowly.

“This isn’t working. All we’re doing is fighting over this. I can’t take it anymore.” The tears started streaming from her eyes and her voice broke. “I love you, but I can’t be with you if this is all it’s going to be.”

His jaw dropped. He stood there gaping at her. “Skye…..” he croaked. “You can’t, we can’t...no! Baby, I love you!”

“I know you do. But is it enough? If you can’t support me with this, or even trust me enough to let me do it on my own, what does that love mean? This is the most important thing I’ve ever done and all you’ve done is fight me on it every inch of the way.”

“Yes, it’s enough! Come on, let’s figure this out. I know we can.” He cupped her face in his hands, pleading with her. She stared back, conflict shining out of her eyes. He leaned in to kiss her, trying to show her how much he cared. But she pulled away and out of his grasp.

“No! You can’t just kiss me and think that makes it all better!”

“Okay! Okay,” he backed away. “But I am going to fight for this, for us. For you. I’m not just giving up. Please, help me. Don’t run away now.”

“This is too much. It’s too hard. I thought you would be the one person in my life to never hurt me. EVER.”

His face crumpled. “Skye, sweetheart. I love you. I can’t live without you.” The tears were falling now, down both of their faces. “I need you. I need your smile. And your laugh. And the way your eyes crinkle when you’re concentrating. And your heart, the way you’re always trying to help everyone around you.”

She sniffled and wiped her eyes. “Then why won’t you be on my side? Why are you fighting me on this?”

“I won’t! I swear! I’ll let it be. I won’t say another word. Just don’t do this. Don’t quit on us.” He was frantic to say whatever he could to make her change her mind.

“It’s too late,” she said resignedly. “I’m sorry, Grant. It’s time to let go.”

He took a step back from her, his heart breaking. She was his Skye, the light and the love of his life. And she was saying she couldn’t stay with him anymore. But there was clearly nothing more to say. Nothing that would make this better.

He grabbed his jacket and walked past her, pausing in the doorway. “Someday Skye….I hope you find what you’re looking for. And I hope they’re everything you want. And when they’re not, I’ll be there.”

She heard the front door close and with that, collapsed on her bed, sobbing her heart out.

The weeks that had passed since that night had felt like she was swimming through molasses. She barely remembered the days immediately following, most of her memories involving laying on Jemma’s couch, crying and drinking wine, while Fitz was at the apartment, helping Ward pick up the rest of his things. Most of the moving boxes never made it out of his place, but after two years of being together, spending more than half their nights with each other, there had been quite a few things to collect. Her friends had taken care of her tenderly, but there was little to do about the gaping hole in her chest where he used to be.

This apartment was going to be the start of their forever. She had moved in first, while he finished out his lease, but she'd always thought of it as theirs. He had loved the jogging trails all around the complex (she couldn't have cared less, but it made him happy). She had been thrilled over the bay windows looking out at the mountains (and what he wouldn't do to see her smile). But now it felt empty, half filled.

She burrowed even deeper into the sweatshirt she was wearing. Even the sweatshirt was a reminder of her broken dreams. It had been the one she always stole from him shamelessly, declaring it to be the most perfect sweatshirt ever; big enough to completely engulf her and warm, but worn in all the right places and endlessly soft. It was the sweatshirt she found on her bed, neatly folded in a way that told her it was intentionally left for her, not just accidentally forgotten. But never mind that she had worn it basically every night since he left; that it was the last thing she thought

* * * * * * *

The sunrise found Ward out on his normal five mile jog. Some Saturdays he stretched it out to seven or eight, but he was still exhausted this morning. He had stayed at the party rather late, until it was all over, helping Fitz & Simmons with everything. He had seen Skye slip out not long after the toasts, with Bobbi and Hunter. But their moment out on the patio had been at the fringes of his mind ever since. As much as he tried to ignore it, he couldn’t get her out of his mind. He kept remembering the shadows under her eyes, the heaviness in her shoulders, the slowness with which she moved. That wasn’t his Skye. And it was a knife in his gut to realize how much of that he was responsible for.

Along with the guilt, the anger smoldered. She was the one who quit on them, she was the one who unilaterally decided that they were done. And all because he was trying to protect her. He knew exactly how this search for her parents was going to play out. Either she'd get caught digging somewhere illegally or maybe she'd never find them and she'd never be able to move on. Or worst of all, she would find them and they would be nothing like she'd imagined. It's easy to idealize someone you know nothing about, especially someone you've always wanted to know. But Ward knew just how terrible families usually were. The idea of family being your safe place, the ones to love and protect you, was a fallacy. Family was what could hurt you the most (and usually did). He never wanted Skye to go through that pain, so he kept trying to convince her to stop. He knew it seemed harsh to her, but what else was he supposed to do? He loved her too much to let these hypothetical parents break her heart. But she never understood what he was doing. She just kept insisting on continuing.

She was right, that night when she gave up. They had been having the same fight over and over for weeks. He would get angry, she would get frustrated, they would yell and usually one of them would run, leaving them both to sulk and lick their wounds. Sometimes there were apologies and sometimes they just ignored what had happened. But nothing ever really got resolved. Yet he had never been ready to give up on their relationship: she was it for him. She was the one who loved him, warts and all (and he had plenty of those). She had gotten through his tough exterior and thawed him from the inside out. It was being around her that showed him that life could be easy, that it didn't have to be a constant battle, that he could let his guard down sometimes. Laughing wasn’t something Grant Ward had done much of in his life; there had never been much occasion to do it. But Skye was always laughing or giggling or simply smiling. It was infectious, you couldn’t spend time with Skye and not feel her brightness. After they first met, before he knew what was happening, Grant Ward started smiling more, even cracked a few jokes. That then encouraged her to tease him and do everything she could to provoke more grins from him. And it worked. He found himself breathing a little easier, having a little bit more patience, and in general enjoying his life, for maybe the first time. He knew without a doubt that this dazzling, passionate, endlessly fascinating woman was responsible for it. He knew she belonged in his life, that she was a part of him. The piece he hadn’t known he was missing.

Now, that piece was missing again. The hole she had filled was even bigger than before. Hoping for something and losing it hurts more than never hoping for anything, he found that out the hard way. So he was left with his guilt and heartache and frustration and anger. Why hadn’t he known better? Why did he let himself get so entrenched with her? He knows this is how it always ends! He knows everyone leaves him or hurts him or both. He should have known she would too. He doesn’t deserve a lifetime of love, he’s not even sure it truly exists.

His feet pounded on the path as he wound his way back to his apartment. As he came inside, his eyes drifted over the neat stack of moving boxes in the corner. He hadn’t found the courage to unpack them and admit they were never going anywhere. A huff of annoyance escaped him and he glared at them, as if it was all their fault. There was a moment of slight relief as he flung his shoe across the room, hitting the boxes squarely and bouncing to the floor. It was time to pull himself together, at least for the day, if not for the future.

On his way to the shower, he happened to pass the end table in the living room, where he saw the picture frame. It held a photo of him and Skye from a few months ago, snapped by Jemma one evening. It was just a quick candid shot, halfway dark and hard to see, but it was his favorite. Skye was looking right at the camera, smiling contentedly, while he held her from behind, smiling as well. He was never happier than when Skye was in his arms, he never wanted to let her go. He picked up the frame and stared at it, not knowing if he wanted to snap it in half or put it away where he wouldn’t be reminded by it. In the end, he placed it back in its place reverently. Even though it hurt, he couldn’t hide her away. She had changed him and made him better, and he could never deny that.

* * * * * * *

A few weeks passed without much fanfare. While the sting of Brandon’s duplicity lingered, Skye made up her mind to move forward and show her bosses just how good she was. On a random Tuesday, she got a text, just as she was leaving work.

Trip, 5:56pm: ‘You have one hour to get all gussied up and meet us at Lebowski’s.’

Skye, 5:57pm: ‘Not sure I can do it tonight. It is a work night after all. ;-)’

Trip, 5:59pm: ‘Nice try, girl, but you’re coming. Remember that promotion I applied for months ago? Well, I found out today that I got it. So, we are celebrating. No ifs, ands, or buts about it.’

Skye, 6:02pm: ‘Squeeeeeeee! Okay, that is a worthy cause. I’ll see you there at 7pm.’

Trip, 6:04pm: ‘Excellent. Can’t wait to see your cute self.’

The seven of them decided to use two lanes, since it was a quiet night at the bowling alley. They were at the far end, leaving space between them and the other patrons. They’d been coming here for years and the owner, Walter, didn’t mind letting them have the extra lane when there weren’t many people there. At first, Skye was a little nervous about being in the group, but it didn’t take long before they had all relaxed into the easy chemistry they’d known for so long. It felt just like old times.

Trip and Ward lined up right next to each other. In perfect sync, they each did a little skip, then sashayed forward, and rolled the ball down their respective lanes. DOUBLE STRIKES! The guys turned back around, jumping up to celebrate. Trip collared Ward in a hug, and before they knew, both guys were on the floor, cackling hysterically.

“Can you even believe these two?” she said to Jemma.

“I know, it’s like they’re seven years old again.”

“Hey, now! You’re wounding my male pride. I am at least 10 years old,” Ward replied haughtily from the floor.

“Come on girl, you know I make this look good,” Trip purred.

Skye laughed, “No arguments from me on that. Now move that good looking ass out of my way, because it’s my turn.”

Trip stood, took a step back, and bowed. “It’s all yours, milady.”

Three games later, Simmons and Ward were declared champions while Bobbi just threw her hands up in defeat.

“It’s not complicated, Bobbi,” Jemma commented before turning to Fitz. “You would think that someone who has such control over her body would know how to roll a ball in a straight line.”

Bobbi just shrugged. “I can’t even defend it, Jemma. For some reason, it all just leaves my body the moment I pick up that ball, so I just throw and pray.”

“Aw, don’t worry about it, love,” Hunter slung an arm around his wife. “Maybe next time we’ll use the bumpers.”

“You’re hilarious,” she deadpanned. “Now, go get me a consolation beer. And nachos!”

“Your wish is my command. Anyone else want to come grab something to eat?”

Ward stood up, “Sure, I’ll come. You guys want anything?”

Fitz piped up, “A cheeseburger and onion rings, please. Oooh! With bacon!”

“Okay. Bacon cheeseburger with onion rings for the engineer. Ladies?” He asked.

Simmons shook her head, “I’m fine, thanks.”

“I’d die for a chocolate milkshake, if you don’t mind,” Skye requested.

Ward snickered, “Why did I even bother to ask?”

She stuck her tongue out at him. He just winked as he and Lance walked away.

“Are you really that bad, or do you just like to let your husband win sometimes?” Skye questioned Bobbi.

“Ugh. I really am that bad. I don’t know how or why, but I am. But it does make him happy too. So, I might as well let him feel like the big shot once in awhile.”

Trip got up and announced, “You know what we need now? We need to get our groove on.”

Simmons chuckled, “Trip, we’re in a bowling alley, not a dance club.”

“Come on, tonight is about celebrating me,” he preened. “Humor me. They’re playing music and there’s plenty of space.”

Fitz jumped up as well, “I’m in. Jems?”

“Only if Bobbi does too.”

“Why am I always getting roped into things with you?”

“Whatever, you know you love it. Plus this is something you actually can do,” Trip snarked.

“Oh, you’re on now, old man.”

Skye couldn’t help but giggle to herself as she watched Jemma, Fitz, Trip, and Bobbi twist and move along with the music. The song had changed and she instantly recognized the beginning strains of ‘Shut Up and Dance’ when she felt a tap on her shoulder. She turned to find a hand reaching out to her. Looking at the owner of said hand, she raised her eyebrow, while the corner of her mouth twitched as well.

“Come on,” he said. “It's your favorite song and you know we can dance circles around those guys.” The mischievous sparkle in his eyes was impossible to miss.

“Well then. It's our moral obligation to show them how it's really done.” Skye grasped his hand and he pulled her up and over to the group.

Skye laughed as they started dancing. This was just the exact thing she loved doing with her friends: letting loose, making fools of themselves, and just being there, happy, with each other. These were the people who had become her family.

Simmons and Fitz had befriended her from the first day she met them, just starting out at The Weaver Institute. Their psychic connection and ability to finish each other’s sentences made her head spin the first few times she witnessed the phenomenon, but it wasn’t too long before she could follow along. The three of them became this close knit trio who did almost everything together. One night, Simmons dragged her fellow biologist out with them. Bobbi and Skye immediately hit it off, finding someone else with a similar sense of humor. Before long, they met Bobbi’s husband Hunter. The foul mouthed Londoner was equal parts entertaining, baffling, and endearing. He had this innate ability to get under your skin but in a way that left you feeling loved. Their little group grew even more when Hunter invited his co-worker Trip, who towed along his college best friend Ward.

The first night Skye and Ward met was one to remember. Hunter had found out about a new pub in town and was determined to try it and judge its authenticity. Simmons and Fitz were on board right away. Bobbi and Skye rolled their eyes good naturedly, but went along, knowing that everyone else wanted to have a taste of home. Hunter had mentioned his friend from work was coming and bringing another friend. He had been thinking for some time that Trip and Skye would make a great couple and he just needed the opportunity to introduce them. He just hoped that Ward the Human Wet Blanket wouldn’t sour Skye before she had a chance to get to know Trip. Lance thought Ward was great, but he wasn’t exactly personable, especially in groups like this.

As Trip and Ward joined the rest in the booth, Trip ended up sitting across from Skye, with Ward next to her. Skye was her normal self, bubbly and bright, drawing in everyone around her. Hunter and Bobbi exchanged a few looks as Trip volleyed right back and the two fell into an easy banter. But Ward remained stubbornly quiet. There was no way Skye was having that, so she started asking him absurd questions.

He was startled when she turned to him and asked, “Would you rather be a unicorn or a woolly mammoth?”

“Um, what?” He blinked, as if she had spoken in a different language.

“Unicorn or woolly mammoth? Which one is more Grant Ward?” she repeated.

“Mammoth, I guess,” he replied quickly, ducking his head.

“So you’d rather be the giant, hairy elephant, fighting everyone with your giant tusks, than a mythical creature with a spear on its head? Good choice.”

“Thanks?” He really had no idea what was going on.

“Next question. If you were given the chance to have painted any great work of art, what would it be?”

He raised his eyebrows, “Serious?”

“Yep,” she nodded. “Inquiring minds need to know.”

“Well, probably The Church at Auvers,” he said thoughtfully.

“Oooooh, a Vincent Van Gogh fan. I like it. Okay, one more question. What is your favorite Pokemon?”

“Huh?”

“Pokemon! The Japanese cartoon, with all the little creatures that you train? Pikachu? Squirtle? Mewtwo? Any of this ringing a bell?”

“Oh right. I can’t say as I’ve watched much of it, but I guess,” he scratched the back of his neck, stalling until he could come up with the one he remembered. “Charmander.”

Skye smiled the most blinding smile Ward had even seen, then turned to their host for the evening. “Hunter, your friend passed. You can keep him.”

“Why thank you, magnanimous one. What ever would I do without your stamp of approval,” he mocked back.

These people had become her family, patchwork though it was. She had always felt comfortable and at ease with them, all of them really. They each gave her something she needed and loved her for who she was. As she danced, holding hands with Ward again, it was almost like nothing had changed. It was a normal weekday evening and the only argument they were likely to have would be about whose apartment to spend the night at or who had to water the plants. Reality crashed back down on her, when she remembered that he wasn’t going to come home with her tonight, or ever again really, and that there was a constant powder keg between them, waiting to explode at a moment’s notice. People walk on eggshells for a reason, she thought.

Ward noticed the tension as it settled in her shoulders and her movements fell out of rhythm. He quirked an eyebrow at her, “You okay?”

She nodded, but looked away quickly. “I’m gonna sit down for a minute. Can’t let that milkshake melt,” she offered weakly.

The rest of the group came over to eat their food as well. Ward kept sneaking glances at her while everyone ate and jabbered away. She got back some of her energy, but still was a bit subdued. What really stood out was the fact that she was avoiding talking with him again. She would look at and reply to everyone else, but was careful not to look at him or direct a question his way. He sighed to himself, Two steps forward, one step back. He slowly slipped to the edges of the conversation and after a bit, congratulated Trip and withdrew for the evening. If he was bothering her that much, he would let her have the rest of the evening with her friends without him.

Chapter 3

Summary:

Skye and Ward get roped into fulfilling Maid of Honor and Best Man duties, together. They are finding a new equilibrium, a new normal between them. It's both comforting to have each other as friends, but something is still missing.

Notes:

There is an important flashback here that I think will help explain a lot more about where they are both coming from.

Thank you so much for your feedback!! It has been so wonderful and lovely and amazing.

(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)

Chapter Text

“Come on Skye! I need you to be there! Fitz got stuck in the lab and we can’t reschedule this appointment and you know I’m rubbish at making decisions by myself. Please come with me!”

“Jeemmmaa,” Skye whined right back. “I have a ton of work I need to get done.”

“That’s not even remotely close to being true. Your sock drawer will still be messy when you get back, and probably for weeks after that. Now, you’re coming with me and eating cake for two hours and helping me decide what I want for my wedding cake. I only have two months until the wedding! Plus, these are official Maid of Honor duties. You have no choice.”

“Fine,” she conceded. “You win. But low blow, Jems, pulling the Maid of Honor card. You only get so many of those.”

“That’s fine,” her friend replied smugly. “Just be at the shop at 1:00pm. I promise we’ll have fun.”

Skye hung up the phone, shaking her head. She did love cake, so how bad could this be?

* * * * * * *

For once in her life, Skye was early. Somehow between being nervous about not finding it and getting an amazing parking spot, she had arrived several minutes early. Jemma’s text said that she was still a ways away. Skye lingered in her car for a couple minutes, then just decided to go in and at least look at the cakes while she waited for Simmons. The bell above the door chimed, announcing her arrival. She glanced around the small room, surveying the confectionary marvels on display. But her eyebrows jumped up as she caught sight of an equally surprised face, looking right at her.

“What are you doing here?” she asked, curiously.

“Fitz got stuck at work and told me I had no choice but to fill in for him. Apparently these are official Best Man duties,” Ward replied. “What about you?”

She laughed, “Basically the same thing. I was threatened with losing my Maid of Honor status if I didn't come. Plus, I figured I'd get a bunch of cake out of the deal, so how could I turn that down?”

He chuckled, knowing her penchant for desserts. “How much do you want to bet they didn't actually talk to each other about dragging us to this?”

“I'll bet my first three pieces of cake on that. When Fitz is focused on the lab, he can barely think of anything outside those walls. It's actually kind of a miracle that he managed to take enough time to convince you to come.”

He opened his mouth to respond when the owner of the shop walked up to them. “Good afternoon! I’m Sylvia. Are you here for the consultation?” she asked.

“Yep. We're ready to eat as much cake as you'll let us,” Skye replied airily.

“Wonderful,” the owner winked at her. “Well I'm sure we'll find just the perfect cake for your special day. You two are a beautiful couple, how soon is the happy occasion?”

Ward sputtered and Skye turned bright red.

“Oh no! We're not-”

“Uhh, it's not for-”

They both stopped at the same time, rather embarrassed. Ward cleared his throat and spoke, “We're not the couple. That would be our friends Jemma Simmons and Leo Fitz. Fitz couldn't make it at the last minute, so we're here strictly in Best Man/Maid of Honor capacities. In fact, I wonder where Jemma is…”

The bell chimed again as the bride-to-be swept into the shop. “Here I am! I'm so sorry I'm late! Traffic was dreadful. Oh Ward! Hello.”

“Hi Jemma. Fitz sent me in his stead, but it looks like you've already recruited Skye. So I will just go and leave you to it.” He started to move towards the door.

“Nonsense! That's just like Fitz to not tell me. No matter. Stay! Let's figure this out together. We'll probably need a man’s opinion to help us from spinning off into crazy bride-land.”

“Alright. As long as you're fine with it,” he said. Jemma nodded and he turned to the other woman. “How about you, Skye? Is it okay with you?”

“Of course!” she squeaked, a little higher pitched than normal. She grimaced for just a second, cleared her throat, then tried again with a more normal tone. “I could probably use the backup, anyway. If left to her own devices, Simmons will probably choose something ridiculous like a steampunk TARDIS cake.”

Simmons’ eyes lit up at that mention. “Actually…”

“No.” Skye wagged her finger at her friend.

Sylvia smiled again. “Well, if everything is settled, follow me and we'll get started.”

 

An hour and a half later, the most gorgeous four tiered cake was selected. Skye and Jemma overruled Ward with chocolate cake, but he held firm for Fitz on buttercream filling. They all compromised on the purple ribbon and matching flowers (calla lilies and freesia). It all went beautifully with the heirloom cake topper that had be used in five generations of Fitz’s family. The three of them walked out of the bakery, stuffed after all the cake samples.

“Well, I have to dash. Fitz texted me that he needs my help at the lab, so I have get over there right away. Thanks for coming you guys!” Jemma waved over her shoulder as she took off so quickly that neither Skye nor Ward had a chance to say goodbye.

They each chuckled a little and looked at the other.

“I don't know about you, but I need walk off all that cake. If I sit down now, I'll fall asleep for hours. Wanna come window shopping with me?” Skye smiled as she offered the invitation.

Ward seemed a little caught off guard. “Uh, I was just, uh, going to go home and…”

“What, read another book? Nope. You're coming with me. It's a gorgeous day, let's go on a walk.” She grabbed his elbow and started dragging him down the block with her. It felt so much like the old days that he felt that faint stab in his heart, but he shook himself and decided to enjoy the afternoon. Being friends with Skye was still a million times better than not having her in his life at all. If she was willing to offer that, he would gladly accept it.

“Alright. What are we scoping out first? Do we have a theme for the adventure?” he asked, knowing the way she liked to explore looking for items that would fit the life of lumberjacks or circus performers or secret agents.

“Hmm….pirates, I think. How does that sound? You wanna be Jack Sparrow for the day?”

“That's Captain Jack Sparrow, poppet,” he said with a wink.

Her head fell back as she howled delightedly. “Perfect!”

 

The afternoon passed quickly for Skye. She and Ward wandered through the shops and galleries, trying on crazy hats, perusing knick knacks, deciding what artwork Captain Jack would hang in his home. Toward the end of the venture, they were looking at a bunch of paintings and Skye saw how Ward stilled and was caught up with one. It was only for a couple of seconds, but it was long enough for her to notice. When she saw what he was looking at, it all made sense. She made a mental note to come back here later, because she knew he needed to have that print.

* * * * * * *

Ward was lounging in bed, just about to turn off the light, when his phone beeped. He was surprised, because it was a text tone he hadn’t heard in a few months.

Skye, 10:42pm: ‘Are you up?’

Ward, 10:44pm: ‘Yeah. What’s up?’

Skye, 10:45pm: ‘I neeeeeed help! I can’t figure something out.’

Ward, 10:45pm: ‘What’s going on!?’

Skye, 10:47pm: ‘What episode was it when Sydney was wearing that goth outfit, with those things that laced up her arms?’

Ward, 10:48pm: ‘.......Are you seriously texting me at 10:45 on a Thursday night, because you can’t remember an episode of Alias?’

Skye, 10:49pm: ‘YES! Come on, I know you remember. I can’t sleep until I figure it out. Pleeeeeease.’

Ward, 10:51pm: ‘You’re ridiculous, you know.’

Skye, 10:53pm: ‘I know. Now are you going to help me or not?’

Ward, 10:56pm: ‘Fine. Remind me what else happened in that episode?’

Skye, 10:58pm: ‘Uh...They’re in a club. Vaughn has guyliner and spiked hair and tons of necklaces. I think Syd’s wearing glasses for part of it?’

Ward, 11:00pm: ‘I can’t believe you convinced me to watch that show. That’s like every episode, Skye.’

Skye, 11:03pm: ‘They were meeting a hacker? I think. And he gets shot…..in the club.’

Ward, 11:07pm: ‘Okay, now I remember. That’s where Sydney sees Lauren in the club, and Vaughn doesn’t believe her. So that means Season 3. And if Lauren is there, and Syd’s suspicious, it makes it late Season 3. Does that help?’

Skye, 11:08pm: ‘YES! Okay now I can find it. Thank you!’

Ward, 11:10pm: ‘You’re welcome. Now I’m going to go to sleep. Any more Alias trivia will have to wait until normal people hours.’

Skye, 11:12pm: ‘ :-P Good night.’

He put his phone back on the nightstand and smiled contentedly. Every step he and Skye took back towards a normal relationship felt like one more piece of his life sliding back together. And he would be lying if he didn’t say how right it felt.

* * * * * * *

Skye smiled at her phone. These last few weeks were the first she had felt normal in a long time (five months, three weeks, and two days, her brain helpfully supplied). She wasn’t ignorant to the fact that the major factor in that was the presence of a certain Grant Ward. Being around him was just so easy, it made her remember every reason she fell in love with him in the first place. But then in the quiet moments, she would remember the fighting and the arguing that never seemed to go anywhere. She could basically pinpoint the exact date when it all changed.

 

“Ward, can you put the plates out on the table? Dinner’s almost ready,” Skye asked over her shoulder, focused on the pot in front of her.

She felt a warm presence behind her before her hair was pulled to the side and a soft kiss was pressed to her neck. “Waaaaaard, not fair! I’m trying to cook here and I need to focus.”

He chuckled quietly, but moved away to clear off the table. “Skye, you know someday, you could actually put things away when you’re done with them.”

“Hush you. Who said I was done with them anyway? Just put them over of that part of the counter,” she gestured.

“You got it, babe.” Ward gathered up the papers strewn all over the table and went to place them on the counter. “Uh, Skye?”

“Yeah?” She was still preoccupied with the stove.

“Who is Calvin Zabo?”

The wooden spoon dropped out of her hand, splashing sauce everywhere. “Oh, uh, that’s maybe my father,” she mumbled, still facing the stove.

“Your...what? Your father?!” Ward was dumbstruck. He knew Skye was an orphan, raised in foster care, but he didn’t know much about what had happened with her parents. She never seemed to dwell on it and he knew more than enough about painful family backgrounds to leave it alone.

“Um, yeah. I’ve been trying to find my parents for awhile now and I finally got a lead on a possible alias of his.” The words tumbled out of her mouth so quickly, it made his head spin.

“And you didn’t tell me about this before, because….?” He was flabbergasted and almost angry.

Skye turned off the burner and put the lid on the pan before removing it from the heat. She took a deep breath and turned to him. “Ward,” she said softly, coming over to sit at the table. “I haven’t told pretty much anyone about this search. Fitz is actually the only one who knows about it, not even Jemma. It’s just…..”

“What, Skye?” His tone was flat, devoid of any feeling. She looked up at him, trying to get a handle on what he was thinking, but his expression gave away less than his voice. It was as if a stone wall had descended in front of him. “What is it?”

“It’s…. Growing up, I never knew anything about my parents. No one knew, or at least not that they told me. A lot of the other kids at least had some memory or knowledge of where they came from, even if it was terrible. But not me. I basically didn’t exist before I showed up on the doorstep of that orphanage. So, of course, I wanted to know more! But every time I told someone about that, they just told me to forget it, that it wasn’t important and I’d never find anything anyway. After being told that enough times, I learned not to say anything.”

“And you thought you couldn’t trust me with it?”

She flinched at his accusation. “That’s not it at all. It has nothing to do with you.” Skye groped to find the right words to explain it to him. How do you explain that you’ve been hiding something like this? That it is so deeply personal, that you’ve been hurt so many other times, that you can’t bear the thought of someone you love this much discounting or dismissing your need to find your family? “I wasn’t sure how to tell you,” she finished lamely.

“So lying about it made more sense. I see how it is,” he ridiculed.

“No!” she exclaimed. “I wasn’t lying about it. But yes, I didn’t tell you. I hid it, not just from you, but from everyone. With you, it was different though. It’s something I’ve always kept close, but by the time I knew I could trust you, it felt too late. I wasn’t sure how I could bring it up without you feeling, well, like you do right now. I’m sorry.” She hung her head, feeling guilty over her deception.

Ward could see the shame rolling over her, but was still too angry to look at it from her perspective. “And now what? What kind of a lead do you have? What do you expect to learn from it?”

“I….don’t know. Maybe where he is? Is he even alive still? What about my mother?” She sounded so uncertain and fragile.

“And? Seriously, Skye, think this through,” he said condescendingly. “Let’s say your parents are alive and you can locate them. Do you actually think they’ll want to talk to you?”

“Why wouldn’t they?” she challenged back. “I’m their daughter! Wouldn’t they want to know me? About my life? About how I am doing?”

“How do you know they’re going to care? You have no idea why they abandoned you. I find it hard to believe there was a good reason.”

You find it hard to believe. Yes, of course, because it’s all about you and what you think. Silly Skye, don’t worry your pretty little head about your family, your history, your identity,” she said sarcastically.

His jaw tensed and her could barely grind out, “Your family is not your identity. They do not define you.”

“I wouldn’t know.” She rolled her eyes.

“Well, I do,” he said with conviction. “Family isn’t something you can rely on. They’re nothing more than the people you were forced to spend your childhood with, and if you’re unlucky enough, genetics too. Be grateful you’re not saddled down with any of that.”

Skye stared at him in shock. “What are you talking about, Grant? Is this…. Are you talking about your family?”

He cringed when he realized exactly what he had said. “Yes,” he muttered as he tried to rein back in his spiraling panic.

“What happened? I’ve never heard you say anything about your family, so I assumed you weren’t close, but what on earth happened with them?”

“I don’t want to talk about it.”

“Too freaking bad!” she cried. “I’m telling you the tiny scraps of information I have, and you’re still mad at me for not trusting you sooner. Well guess what, this is a two way street. You want me to trust you, you have to trust me too.”

He stared at his hands for a minute, wrestling with what to tell her. He had buried so much, for so long, that opening that door even a crack was dangerous. “My family were not good people. My parents probably never should have had children, but we came along anyway. My older brother was the golden child, the one who was the heir to the throne. My younger brother was the angel, the cherished baby. And I was left in the middle, the black sheep that no one could be bothered with. On a good day, they simply ignored my existence. But the bad days….” He trailed off, it becoming too painful to continue.

Seeing his obvious pain, she softened, slid over to him and put her hand on his. “You don’t have to tell me everything.”

“Let’s just say, there weren’t very many good days.”

“Ward,” she murmured. “I’m sorry. You didn’t deserve that. No child does.”

“I wish I didn’t know them. I haven’t seen or talked to them in 13 years and if I ever do again, it will be too soon.”

She leaned her head on his shoulder. He held himself rigidly, as if the slightest movement would cause him to shatter into pieces. She simply stayed there, waiting patiently until finally the tension in his body started to recede. When he had finally relaxed, she looked up at him, put her hand on his cheek, and gave him a soft, sweet kiss. He opened his mouth to say something, but his stomach growled, effectively ruining the moment. They both chuckled softly, the tension starting to recede.

“I guess I better feed you. I wonder if it’s still any good,” she said, looking over at the stove.

“If not, there’s always pizza,” he offered. “We’ve done that plenty of times.”

“Is that a knock against my cooking abilities?” she asked.

“Um….no?” he squeaked.

She smacked his arm. “Hey! You watch it, mister, or no dessert!”

“Dessert?” He perked up. “What’s for dessert?”

“Nothing at this point. Though I suppose you could try to earn it back,” she teased, flouncing back to the stove. “But first, we eat dinner. Grab a plate, Robot.”

He smiled crookedly back at her and moved over to help dish up the food, their argument left by the wayside.

Ignoring the conflict had only worked for so long. The bitter comments and arguments began to spring up more often and came closer together. It wore her out, trying to justify her search against his complete vehemence. Especially when he was the one she wanted comfort and support from the most. Maybe if they didn’t have the pressure of the relationship, of building a life together, then the conflict over the rest wouldn’t matter so much. At least, that was what she hoped. She wasn’t ready to let Ward go from her life yet.

Notes:

If you want to ask questions or chat, feel free to look me up on tumblr!

Chapter 4

Summary:

Trip asks Ward about what is going on between him and Skye, but Ward doesn't have a great answer. Then, it's time for the Bachelor & Bachelorette Party! The gang all gets together to have a good time, but it takes an unexpected turn.

Notes:

(See the end of the chapter for notes.)

Chapter Text

Trip handed Ward a beer and settled back down on the couch. “Okay man, time to come clean. What is going on with you and Skye?”

Ward groaned, “And here I thought we were going to have a nice guys’ night.”

“You honestly thought you were getting out of this without having to explain? Never gonna happen. So you might as well just give it up now.”

“Fine,” Ward huffed. “The short answer is nothing really. We seem to have moved past that awkward stage where we don’t know what to do around the other and are comfortable again.”

“And that’s it? Nothing more?”

“What do you want me to say, Trip? We’re finally friends again and that’s just fine.”

Trip barked out a laugh, “If that’s what you want to believe, then go for it. But no one else believes that for a second.”

Ward grimaced. “What choice do I have? She’s the one who called it quits. Am I supposed sit here pining for her? Or beg her to take me back every chance I get? What good is that going to do me? If all I can get is being friends with her, that’s better than nothing. And why anyone else thinks it’s any of their business I have no clue,” he finished angrily.

Trip held up his hands in surrender and his expression sobered, “Hey man, I get it. You’re probably doing the best thing. I’m just saying there is still obviously something between you. Are you really ready to give up on it?”

Ward stared at the bottle in his hand for a couple minutes, not really sure what he wanted to say.

Trip continued on, “You love her and I’m 98.47% sure that she still loves you. Is whatever happened between you more important than that?”

“I didn’t think so, but she said it wasn’t enough,” he said quietly.

“What did happen? You two were all domestic bliss and sunshine, enough to make the rest of us sick, and then BAM. It was over and neither of you would say what happened.”

Ward ground his teeth together, conflicted as to what to tell Trip. He was fine with explaining the story, but there was no way to do that without exposing her search for her parents. And as frustrated as he was with her secrecy, it still wasn’t his story to tell. “Listen Trip, I can’t give you all the details, because it involves stuff that isn’t mine to explain. But basically, I want her to stop working on something and she refuses. She won’t listen to me that it’s going to end up hurting her.”

“I see,” Trip said slowly. “And that’s it? You just asked her to stop, she said no, and that was it? Y’all were done?”

“Well, not exactly.” Ward couldn’t meet his best friend’s eyes. “There may have been several arguments about it. Over and over again. And I may have ended up hiding some information from her, which you can imagine went over really well with her.”

 

Ward was laying on the couch, reading, when all of a sudden a paper floated down, landing on his chest. Confused, he looked up at Skye, seeing a fury in her eyes he’d never seen before.

“Care to explain?” she said icily.

“Huh?” he grunted as he sat up.

“I just found this, seemingly hidden in the closet. Any idea on how it got there?” Her tone was positively deadly.

Ward studied the paper and his eyes widened as he realized its significance. “Oh,” he breathed.

“Oh? That’s all you have to say? Oh?!”

He knew what she wanted him to say, but he couldn’t bring himself to admit it. The government seal in the bottom corner, the title ‘Certificate of Live Birth’ across the top, and the names listed there, ‘Calvin’, ‘Jiaying’, ‘Daisy’ all shouted at him. “Skye….”

“Why, Grant? Why?! Why did I find this on the top shelf, under the blankets? It obviously didn’t put itself there. How long have you been hiding it from me?”

Ward exhaled slowly. “Only like a week, I swear,” he admitted.

“Were you ever going to tell me about it?” she demanded.

“Maybe? I don’t know,” he sighed defeatedly.

“You don’t know?! What made you think you got to decide whether I saw it or not?” Her voice steadily rose with each sentence.

“I just panicked, okay? I had picked up the mail and didn’t realize what it was until after I’d opened it, Then you got home as I was looking at it and I shoved it up there to deal with later,” he tried to explain, getting defensive himself.

“Why didn’t you just show it to me?! Who said it was yours to deal with?” She was yelling now. “Instead, you just hid this. THIS. My birth certificate, that I have been searching for for years. You took it upon yourself to stop me from finding out the most important details of my life. My name, my birthday. Things I never knew. But never mind, it’s no big deal. Those aren’t worth knowing anyway, are they? Certainly not according to the all-knowing Ward,” she sneered.

“Oh, your name is so important to you? The name that you have changed, how many times now?” he snarled back.

Her jaw dropped. “Screw this. I can’t even look at you right now.” She grabbed her keys and stomped out of the apartment, slamming the door behind her.

Later that night, Ward was laying in bed when Skye crept back in. He feigned sleep, but listened as she got ready and slipped into bed next to him. He was just about to roll over and tell her he was sorry, when he heard her sniff. His heart sunk as the sound of her muffled sobs reached him. She clearly was trying to keep it quiet, he knew he would only make it worse by intruding. So he kept still and let her be, even if it hurt him to hear her pain. Eventually, her cries subsided and she fell into a fitful sleep. But Ward just laid there all night stewing over how the discovery of the birth certificate and his hiding of it was another symptom of the fissure between them. A chasm which only seemed to be widening. And that thought scared him to death.

“Ward, man. How could you do that?” Trip asked, shaking his head. “You’re lucky she didn’t throw you out on your ass right then."

"I know.” Ward refocused on the bottle. “So you can see why I’m not exactly sure what to do now.”

Trip took a deep breath. “Well, since she’s not going to give up….whatever it is she’s doing, are you willing to back off about it? Because she’s right that if nothing is changing, then there’s no point in continuing to bang your heads against the wall. So, if you want to be with her, it sounds like it’s in your court to make that happen. Is that something you can do?”

Ward stared a minute longer, “I don’t know.”

Trip nodded thoughtfully, “I guess you’re just her friend until you figure that out.”

* * * * * * *

Once again, Skye found herself in a sour mood, while preparing to go out for Jemma and Fitz. Only these two would decide to just have a combined bachelor and bachelorette party.

“But Skye! We have all the same friends. We’re just getting drinks and dancing, no strippers or crazy games. Why not do it together?” Simmons had explained. Skye had rolled her eyes, but knew there was no arguing with these two. They had scarcely been apart in the last 15 years, no reason to think it would start now.

So Skye was putting on a cute top, the skinny jeans she knew made her ass look great, and her favorite boots. She even curled her hair and put on eyeliner. Maybe it would distract everyone from the scowl that seems to be permanently attached to her face today. It had been another bear of a week at work and she had no patience left for anyone. Especially Grant Ward and his painfully keen perception. He always seemed to see through her mask, to see what was really going on with her underneath, and she wasn’t sure she could handle the scrutiny tonight. They had reached a nice equilibrium; they were friends. They talked, hung out once in awhile, and had helped with a few things for the wedding together. But they kept it superficial. They didn’t go into great depth with each other, choosing to keep it light and breezy. It was great to not feel agitated around him anymore, but she couldn’t help but feel something was lacking between them. The confusion roiling around inside her head set her on edge before the night even started.

Bobbi and Hunter had offered to pick her up so she didn’t have to drive. Sitting in the backseat, Skye stared out the window while letting their normal bickering wash over her. She found it almost comforting, the rhythm to their banter; something dependable, something constant. It was on par with Fitzsimmons’ science babble, where most people couldn’t follow it and were confused how the pair could function in a relationship, but once you spent some time with them, the warmth and adoration underneath became clear. That was just how they communicated. Skye remembered wistfully hoping that some day she would have someone who loved her that much. Then Ward walked into her life, and it felt like she had finally found it, her happily ever after. But it clearly wasn’t meant to be. She shook herself and refused to let her mind wander down the what-might-have-been path. She had done that plenty over the last few months and it never made her feel better. This was her life now and she would make the best of it. Plus, tonight was about Fitz and Simmons and having a good time with them. So, she refocused on the ongoing argument between Hunter and Bobbi, interjecting as she could, flummoxing Lance and cracking up Bobbi.

As they entered the club, Hunter commented, “Well, at least they chose something normal like a club, even if they had to be their weird selves and have a combined party.”

“Give them a break, Hunter. You’re just bitter Fitz said no to strippers,” his wife replied.

“Of course I am! What kind of a bachelor party doesn’t have strippers?” he said indignantly.

Skye rolled her eyes, “A bachelor party for the two sweetest science nerds on the face of the planet.”

Hunter just heaved a sigh and moved to join the group at the table. Skye slid in next to Simmons.

“Before we get any farther, I have something for you, Jemma.” Skye reached into her bag to pull out a cheesy Bride-To-Be sash, complete with glitter and a sparkly and very pink tiara. She draped them on her surprised friend.

“Skye, no!” She protested.

“Jemma, yes. It’s tradition. The Bride-To-Be must be easily identified by everyone within a 3 mile radius. You may be going low-key with the party, but this is my Maid of Honor duty. I would lose my title if I didn’t make sure you had this. Just be grateful I didn’t bring the Penis Pasta.”

“I can’t believe you pulled the Maid of Honor card,” Simmons grumbled as she set the tiara more firmly on her head.

“You started it,” Skye responded slyly, before she reached over and flicked the switch on the back, making the tiara light up and start flashing.

Fitz watched the scene, a pout appearing on his face. “How come she gets all the cool stuff?”

“Leopold Fitz, are you honestly jealous of this obnoxious sash?” his fiancee asked.

“Don’t worry, Fitz. I got you covered,” Ward interjected. From behind him, he pulled out a t-shirt and threw it over. “Consider my Best Man duties fulfilled as well.”

Fitz unfurled it, a huge grin blossoming on his face, and quickly pulled it on over his sweater. ‘Keep Calm and Kiss The Groom’ greeted everyone around the table.

“All right, now that you all are properly labeled, can we start the drinking?” Hunter whined.

Trip chuckled, “Do you even have a functioning liver anymore? You know what? I don’t want to know. I’m going to go grab the first round and we’re going to play ‘I Never’.”

Everyone settled into the booth, with their drinks in front of them.

“I’ll start! I never…..have gone skinny dipping,” Fitz said proudly. Skye, Ward, Trip, and Bobbi all took a drink.

It moved to Jemma next. “I never….have failed a class.” Skye, Hunter, and Fitz swallowed a gulp.

“I never….have crashed my car into a tree,” Skye declared. Jemma’s eyes were shooting daggers at her best friend as she drank.

“My turn!” exclaimed Bobbi. “I have never sleepwalked.” Hunter grumbled as he took his drink.

“Fine, dear. I have never given someone a black eye while on a date,” he shot back. Bobbi narrowed her eyes, but drank. What caught everyone off guard was Trip taking a drink too.

“Whoa, whoa, whoa. I think we need to hear this story!” Hunter crowed.

“No way. It happened when I was 17 and will never be repeated,” Trip said. “Now, to me. I never have I had sex in a friend’s bed, while they were home.” Bobbi and Hunter guiltily drank.

Ward looked at them, grossed out. “Seriously, guys. No. Not okay. Okay, I have never been to Disneyland.”

“Never?! You’ve never been there? What kind of family doesn’t take their kid to Disneyland? Even I have been there!” Simmons shrieked as everyone but Skye and Ward took a drink. Their eyes met across the table and Skye watched the shadow pass across his face at the mention of his family. She offered a weak smile and he just nodded in return.

Fitz started the next round and they continued on for a couple more rounds. But it was Simmons’ declaration of never running away from home that cast a dark cloud over Skye’s mood. Sure, Hunter and Trip had both taken a drink along with her, but she knew that the most ‘running away’ either of them had done was an afternoon spent in the backyard, a child’s declaration to live in their treehouse that was given up at the first sign of rain or when it was dinner time. Skye wasn’t even sure running away from the orphanage truly counted as running away from ‘home’. You had to have a home to run away from. Since the glasses were almost empty, she volunteered to get the next round. If nothing else, she needed a couple minutes to herself before putting back on a smile.

Skye tapped her fingers on the bar while she waited for the drinks to be prepared. She became aware of a presence next to her, but didn’t bother to look over. She just wanted to head back to the table with her friends.

“Wasn’t that you I saw dancing on the table a bit ago?” came the voice from beside her.

“Nope. Wrong girl,” she said curtly, giving the stranger only a cursory glance before turning back to the bar, trying to make it clear she wasn’t interested in a conversation.

“Are you sure? I was sure it was you. Hard to forget a face like yours, sweetheart,” he practically purred.

She was getting annoyed now, but didn’t want to cause a scene. “Wasn’t me. I’ve been with my friends the whole time.” The drinks arrived in front of her and she could make her escape. As she tried to figure out how to carry them back to the table, the guy chimed in once again.

“That’s quite the assortment you’ve got there. Looks like you’re looking for a good time tonight,” he leered at her. “I’d love to help with that.” The double entendre was clear.

“No thanks, I’ve got it. I better get back to my table now,” she said firmly.

She started picking up glasses and almost had them managed when he snatched one from right in front of her. “Show me the way, doll.”

“No,” she gritted out. “Give me back my drink, please.”

He reached out to touch her arm, but before she could react, his face screwed up in pain.

“She said ‘No’,” Ward growled. “Learn to listen to the words said to you.”

“Hey man, I’m just trying to help! Let me go, this has nothing to do with you,” the jerk squeaked out, his arm twisted behind him.

“She was clear she wasn’t interested. Hand her back the drink and go far, far away,” the menace in his voice was unmistakable. If it had been directed her way, Skye would have been terrified.

“Is there a problem over here?” the bouncer interrupted.

“Not at all,” Ward flashed a smile, which you would only see the seething underneath if you knew him well. “Just reminding this jackass that no means no.”

“Why don’t you let me take it from here?”

“By all means,” Ward sneered, as he shoved the guy towards the bouncer.

Security escorted the guy away from them and out the door. Skye took a deep breath and Ward turned to her.

“You're welcome,” he said smugly.

“I'm welcome?!” she stuttered in disbelief. “I didn't need your help. I had it handled myself.”

He rolled his eyes. “Yes, because it was obviously working so well. Pardon me for stepping in before that guy started mauling you.”

“I will not pardon you. I was just about to tell him off myself and if that hadn't worked, I know how to kick a guy in the balls. I've done it plenty of times before I met you, oh great protector Grant Ward.” Her words were practically dripping with venom.

His face darkened, “And why were you getting into situations where you would need to do that to get out of them? Do you even realize how many times I kept you from getting in over your head?”

The insinuation that she couldn’t handle her life on her own lit a fire in her, so she set the glasses down on the bar and threw caution to the wind. “Really? You wanna do this now? Fine. News flash: I don't need you to fight my battles. I have done it by myself for years.”

He sneered, “Oh right. You've totally had it all together. You definitely didn't any help, with anything. How could I forget I'm dealing with the all powerful and infinitely wise Skye? I can't believe I had to audacity to think she might actually appreciate a little help for once.” His eye roll was so intense, she was surprised the people across the club didn’t hear it.

“I'm not a child, Ward! I don't need you to save me from myself,” she threw back at him.

“Well, clearly you do,” he dismissed. “You couldn't even handle finding your birth certificate without coming unhinged.”

Skye sucked in a sharp breath. “I can’t believe you just said that, Ward,” she warned.

“Well, am I wrong? Because I distinctly remember you crying yourself to sleep that night.”

“Because you hid it from me!” she shrieked.

“Again, seems like it was a pretty good decision, if that was how you reacted.”

“It wasn't your decision to make!” Her voice had gotten so loud, everyone around them was staring. “But you made the decision for me. I never even had a choice. You never once gave me the benefit of the doubt or even bothered to listen to me. You just assumed that I was barging ahead without any regard and that no matter what, it was going to end in disappointment. How could you know any of that?!”

“Life isn't all sunshine and unicorns, Skye. It doesn't work that way. Who am I kidding? It's not like you'd have any clue about something like that.”

CRACK. The force of her slapping his face surprised them both. But she continued to stare him down, the most infuriated he had ever seen her. “Don't you ever, EVER, tell me that I don't understand.”

Their eyes remained locked while neither practically dared to breathe. Another heartbeat of excruciating tension and then Ward spun on his heels and stalked away.

Notes:

I feel like I should apologize for the end of this chapter....... But I'm not going to. Because that scene needed to happen. But if you need to scream about it, I welcome it! In fact, I encourage it. Leave a comment and/or come find me on tumblr and let's all freak out together.

Chapter 5

Summary:

Ward and Skye have to come to terms with their new realities, life without the other in it. But before they go their separate ways, they see each other at the rehearsal dinner.

Notes:

I know, that fight left everyone heartbroken. It was brutal. But I hope this makes up for it.

(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)

Chapter Text

Ward woke up in a foul mood. Between the alcohol from the party and the fight with Skye, his stomach was sour and churning. He thought about going for a jog, but decided weights and the punching bag sounded much more appealing. But after two hours at the gym, and some rather bruised knuckles, he was feeling worse, not better. The anger was starting to fade and the guilt seeped in. Guilt over ruining Fitz’s night (and Simmons’ too, now that he thought about it), guilt over letting his temper get the better of him, and guilt over the cruel things he said to her. Not that she was an innocent party in this, she had flung her fair share of razor sharp insults and retorts. But he knew he had gone too far, if the lingering sting on his cheek was any indication.

Now there was only a week to go until the wedding, where he would have no choice but to see her and be next to her and touch her. Even less than a week when you counted the rehearsal dinner. He wasn't exactly in a rush to be around her. He was still too frustrated and bitter to trust himself in her presence. It was good they had at least a few days before they had to come face to face. Maybe they would both cool off by then and be able to be civil. It was probably all he could hope for at this point.

* * * * * * *

It felt like any other Tuesday, Grant Ward got up, worked out, went to work, picked up dinner on the way home, and was planning on spending the evening in his apartment. But it was his birthday, Grant Ward was a year older. He wasn't quite sure how he felt about it. Growing up, no one ever cared or celebrated his birthday, so he never had a fondness for it. Just add that to the list of things Skye changed in him. She demanded that birthdays be celebrated and she made sure he knew how glad she was that he had been born. His two birthdays with her had been the two best of his life. Without her, the day didn’t feel special at all.

Ward walked up to his apartment, but was confused by the brightly colored package on the doorstep. He bent down to pick it up and saw the card. It simply said “Happy Birthday Ward”, but he recognized that handwriting in an instant. He scooped it up and brought it inside. He dropped his takeout on the counter, forgetting about it, and sat down at the couch with the present.

He just stared at the box in his hands for quite awhile. It was obvious she had brought it over herself, it hadn’t been shipped. The fact that she would still do that, even after their bitter fight, took his breath away. If she ever stopped surprising him, he wouldn’t know what to do. The wrapping paper with the cartoon robots made him smile. Finally, he slid his finger under the tape and slowly removed the paper. He set it aside carefully (Skye could never convince him to rip apart the paper) and lifted up the lid of the box. As he saw what was inside, everything in his mind screeched to a halt. It was a canvas painting of a chocolate lab, looking off to the side, with a bright blue sky behind it.

It was the picture he had seen a couple months ago, when walking around town with Skye.

He had no idea she had even noticed him looking at it. But it was Skye, of course she did. And she was one of the only people who would have known the significance for him. The dog looked so much like his childhood puppy, Buddy. During a childhood filled with pain and neglect, Buddy was the one bright spot. Grant and Buddy were an inseparable duo for years. The only affection he ever received was from his dog. Losing Buddy was one of the hardest things he’d ever gone through, especially because he no longer had any pictures or reminders of the labrador. So the painting had grabbed his attention right away. But he hadn't said a word about it and didn’t think he’d looked at it that long. Apparently Skye had taken note and went back later to get it for him. And she had still delivered it to him, even after their blow up.

Grant sniffled and wiped his eyes. He was dumbfounded. He sat there, staring at the picture, remembering his beloved pup and reflecting on the woman who gave it to him, for what felt like hours. He still couldn’t believe that she had done this for him.

It took him another 40 minutes of typing, staring at his phone, erasing, re-typing, and so on before he finally hit send.

'Thank you.' was all it ended up saying. Anything else felt too much.

A little over 20 minutes later, his phone beeped. 'You’re welcome.' was the simple reply.

That night, Ward went to sleep with a slight smile on his face. It was still one of his best birthdays, all because of her.

* * * * * * *

A truce was about all Skye felt she could hope for. Things were irretrievably broken between her and Ward, she couldn’t fathom any way that they could repair it. They would pull themselves together for the wedding and after that, probably part ways forever. Her very core ached at that thought, but there was no other option. It had gone too far this time.

But she would not let that stop her from being there for her friends. Fitz & Simmons deserved the very best Skye could give. It was their special day after all, and with so many years of them being there for her, at her lowest and her highest, she had to give back to them somehow. So, she pulled herself together, got in her fancy dress and heels, and met everyone at the hall.

It was utter chaos. Fitz looked beyond lost and Jemma was spinning off into another world, she was speaking so quickly. It didn’t help that Mrs. Simmons was eyeing everything critically and whispering to her husband. Skye caught Jemma by the arm, as she whirled past.

“Jemma, hey, whoa. What is going on?”

“Skye! Oh my goodness, I am so glad you’re here! The officiant hasn’t arrived yet, they didn’t finish setting up the hall, the flower girl is sick, and I just got a call that the harpist can’t be there tomorrow! It’s a disaster and we haven’t even gotten there yet!”

“Okay, okay! Take a breath, Simmons! Let’s figure this out,” Skye said, putting a hand on either of Simmons’ arms. “First things first, what kind of sick is the flower girl? Will she be better by tomorrow?”

“I think my sister said she had eaten too much candy on the drive here. But she can’t get sick everywhere! Not on her dress, not all over the hall!”

“Whoa! It’s okay. Have your brother in law take her back to the hotel and get her to bed. We’ll have someone else stand in for her tonight, and she’ll be back and ready to go tomorrow.”

“Yes, okay. That sounds like a good plan.”

“Alright, next. It doesn’t matter that the hall isn’t set up. All we need are the first couple rows in the front for the families and the aisle. The rest will be done in time for tomorrow.”

“Of course. You’re right. That part is done.”

“See? Two things knocked out already. Next, the harpist. Did he say why he couldn’t make it? You know what? It doesn’t matter. Did he happen to give you any recommendations of others who might be able to fill in for him?”

“You know, he did give me some numbers.”

“Perfect,” Skye assured her friend, then looked around the room. “Hey, Bobbi! Come here!”

The blonde walked over, “What’s up?”

“Jemma is gonna give you the numbers for some harpists. Hers cancelled last minute, so we need to get a replacement. Do you think you can call around and try to book one, while we’re waiting?”

“Sure, I’m great at talking people into things.” Skye and Jemma both snorted and glanced towards Bobbi’s husband. “Do you know what music you want them to play, Jems?”

“Yes, here are the titles and the names. Thank you so much, Bobbi!” the bride gushed.

“Great! I’ll let you know when I have it all arranged.” Their friend walked off, already pulling out her cell phone and dialing.

Skye got Jemma’s attention again. “Look at that! Three out of four problems practically solved. So the last one: the officiant isn’t here yet?”

The Brit shook her head, “She should have been here 20 minutes ago!”

“Mmhmm. Have you tried calling her?” she inquired.

“I was going to, but then I got sidelined by everything else.”

Skye nodded, “Totally understandable. Go call her now and at least find out what’s going on.”

While Jemma walked off to make the call, Skye flagged down Fitz. “How are you doing? Everything okay?”

“Yeah, I’m fine. I just get flustered when Simmons is stressed.”

“I get it. How about you go get yourself and her a drink? Something to calm you both down.”

He both relaxed and brightened up at the suggestion. “Great idea! I’ll be right back.”

Skye watched her friend walk out of the room and observed the calm that seemed to be settling on everyone.

“Nice job, Olivia Pope,” Hunter drawled from behind her. “Shall we add Crisis Management to your list of skills?”

Skye snickered, “Go for it. Glad I could put all that binge watching to use.”

Hunter smiled, then took a closer look at her. “How are you doing? You hanging in there?” he asked softly.

“I’m fine. Just have to concentrate on getting these two through the next 24 hours.”

“Mmhmm, sure. You’re clearly doing so well that you haven’t slept more than four hours in days.”

“Hey!” she objected. “Are you telling me I look anything less than stellar?”

He put an arm around her, “I’m telling you that I can see the weight in your eyes. And it’s gonna be okay, love.”

She leaned her head on his shoulder for a second, “Thanks, Lance.”

“Oh, the first name treatment! Things must be getting deep now.”

“Shut up,” she elbowed him in the rib cage. “How does Bobbi put up with you?”

“It’s my inescapable charm.”

She rolled her eyes, “Something like that.”

Jemma came back in the room, with the officiant trailing behind, looking rather sheepish. “Alright everyone, we’re all here, so we can get started.”

The officiant beckoned everyone to come gather together and explained where everyone would be standing, what order they would be entering in, and how much time to stagger between entrances. The wedding party headed to the hallway while the family sat down. As everyone lined up in the hallway, the officiant sorting them all into the proper order, Skye snuck a peek or two at Ward. He looked just as tired as she felt, but he certainly didn’t spare a glance her direction, so she refocused her attention on making sure she came out at the proper time.

The mock ceremony flowed smoothly, everyone seemed to understand what was expected, and then it was time for the recessional. Which meant she would be face to face with, and on the arm of, Ward. She took a deep breath as Jemma and Fitz walked back down the aisle, then stepped forward. Their eyes met for the first time since she slapped him. Where she expected to still see anger and irritation, she found that mysterious gaze of his, the one where she could never quite tell what he was thinking. It didn’t feel harsh, but it was intense. He extended his arm and she gracefully took it. They turned and slowly made their way out of the hall. Skye felt like she could hardly breathe, she didn’t know what she was thinking, let alone what should be going through her mind right now. Guilt, shame, frustration, hurt, and sadness all welled up inside of her, demanding attention she couldn’t give. But she swallowed it back down. She could sort it out later, but having an emotional crisis in the middle of a wedding rehearsal wasn’t going to help anyone.

All of the couples gathered at the end of the hallway, waiting for the recessional to finish. Ward dropped her arm while they stood there and took a step away. His face still gave nothing away, but something in his body language told her there was something else going on with him. He seemed coiled just a little too tight, a little too jittery and nervous. She got the distinct impression that he was giving space for her benefit, not because he was trying to get away from her. But he still didn’t speak. It was unsettling and confusing, but there was no more time to dwell on it, because the officiant had come out and congratulated them all on a smooth rehearsal. She confirmed for Jemma and Fitz that everything would go perfectly tomorrow and they should relax and enjoy the evening with their families before getting a good night’s rest. They smiled at each other, a glow practically emanating from them, before kissing.

“Save it for tomorrow! Some of us are hungry!” Trip called out, his grin at odds with his words.

“Fine, fine!” Fitz sputtered. “Everyone in! It’s time to eat.”

 

The dinner portion of the evening was going nicely. It was calm, especially after the chaos at the beginning. Everyone was enjoying the meal and talking about what they were excited about for the next day. Skye excused herself to go get another drink. She was refilling her glass when that familiar feeling prickled on her neck. His warmth materialized next to her and it was all she could do to keep from sighing.

“Thank you,” he murmured quietly. “I really mean it. The gift was amazing.”

“You’re welcome. I’m glad it made you happy,” she responded, keeping her voice as neutral and calm as she could.

“I can’t believe you remembered about it. And that you still brought it over, even after….” He trailed off, as if he couldn’t bring himself to talk about the fight.

“Well, I wanted you to have it. It wasn’t going to do me any good, so I made sure you got it.”

“Skye,” he began uncertainly. “I want to say, about last week…”

“You know what? Let’s not do this, at least not right now. This is about Fitz & Simmons and they shouldn’t have to deal with us dragging this all up again. We’ll get through tomorrow and then we don’t have to keep doing this. We can go our separate ways and move on.” Her voice was thick and she couldn’t quite meet his eyes. He could see how much it cost her to say it.

He decided it was now or never. “But what if I don’t want to? What if I don’t want to go our separate ways? What if what I want to tell you is that I’m sorry from the bottom of my heart for everything I said?”

Skye gasped and looked him straight in the eyes. Everything around her disappeared and all she could focus on was the earnest look on his face. “Ward. I….” she said breathlessly.

He opened his mouth to speak, then closed it again. He glanced quickly around the room, then coming to a decision, grabbed her hand, “Come with me, this isn’t a conversation for everyone else to hear.”

Skye put her glass down on the table and let him lead her out of the room. They peeked in a couple doors before finding an empty room. She still hadn’t said a word, but just looked at him with wide eyes. It didn’t escape her that he still hadn’t let go of her hand.

“Skye,” he finally spoke. “I am so sorry for what I said. I’m sorry for hurting you. I’m sorry for not being there for you. Hell, I’m just sorry! I miss you and I want a chance to make it up to you.”

Her eyes welled up with tears. She wanted desperately to throw herself in his arms and tell him to come home. But she held herself back, pulling her hand from his. This past week had been a rude reminder of their still very present, very real issues. No matter how much they enjoyed being around each other, how easy it was, and how much they might love each other, that fight had shown her how little he trusted her in ways she needed and how angry they both were.

“Ward,” she gulped. “Do you really think it would be different? Do you really think anything has changed? I mean, look at the club. That started off about something random, and ended with us screaming at each other about the same damn things. How can it be any different?”

“We can be different. I can be different,” he promised.

She sat down on a chair, a few feet from him. “Will you really? Are you really going to be okay with me continuing to search for my parents? I told you I’m not going to give that up. So far you haven’t shown that you can handle it.”

He bristled, but kept his composure. “I can’t deny that I don’t like the idea. I don’t know why you want you want to keep looking for them But, I guess, if that’s what you want, I will keep my mouth shut about it.”

“Keeping your mouth shut is the best you can give?” Skye felt her temper starting to flare again. “I can’t expect or even hope for something more supportive? Just you skulking in the background, scowling and huffing over it all?”

He felt exasperated. “I don’t know what more I can offer. I don’t want to see you get hurt, but I know it’s going to happen. I can’t protect you from it, when you insist on charging in. But I am willing to stay quiet, even if the worst happens.”

“And what is the worst that can happen? Tell me, Ward. Because I'm trying to figure out how this affects you. What does it matter to you if I find my parents or not?!” she challenged.

“Because what if you find them, they love you, and you don't need me anymore? What am I supposed to do then?!” he cried, with the most broken voice she'd ever heard.

Everything snapped into place for her. That is what this was all about. He was so terrified of losing her, of being left alone, and he had no clue what to do about it. She doubted he had even recognized the fear for what it was before the words came spilling out of him. In front of her was not the strong, mature Ward she had known for years, but a little boy, who had been abandoned by everyone who was supposed to love him. And with that realization, she had an epiphany of her own.

She walked over to him, and put her hand on his cheek, clasping his hand with her other.

“Grant,” she spoke softly, as he looked down, refusing to meet her eyes. “Grant, look at me.”

He finally brought his gaze up to meet hers, tears leaking down his face.

“That is not happening. If I woke up tomorrow and my parents were on my front door step, it wouldn't change the fact that you are the one I want inside the house with me. Yes, I desperately want to know where I came from and what happened to my family. But if I never find a single thing more about my parents, I will still have a place I belong. Because they are my past. YOU are my future. You're the one I want to build a home and a family of our own with. I've lived without them for 27 years. But these last few months, without you? They've been the worst of my life. I need to find them, but I need you more.”

The sheer disbelief and amazement on his face was staggering. He searched her face, looking for the slightest note of insincerity or deceit. Upon finding nothing but honesty and love, he dove in to kiss her. It was an epic, passionate, life-altering kiss. It was the kiss of I'm sorry, I was wrong; of I'm going to make it up to you; of I'm never going to leave you; of I love you more than I could have ever imagined. She poured all of herself into it, all of I'm here for you always; all of Please stay with me; all of You're all I ever wanted; all of You're who I choose.

His hands were cupped around her face and hers with linked behind his neck. They rested their foreheads against each other and took a moment to breathe.

“Skye?”

“Yes?”

“I want this. I want you. I can’t do it again, I can’t live without you. Please stay with me.”

“Of course. I won’t leave you. I’m here. And this time we’re going to do it better, okay?”

“Whatever you say,” he rushed to agree.

“No, not whatever I say,” Skye chided. “This is for both of us. We both are going to change and try harder. Would it help if I told you more about the search for my parents? If it was something we did together?”

Ward mulled that over for a minute. “Maybe? Yeah, I think it would. And I really do promise I will try to be more supportive. It’s so hard for me to believe that it could turn out well, but I really do want something good to come of this. For you.”

Her eyes shone up at him. “Thank you, Grant. That means everything to me.”

“I love you.”

“I love you too.”

Notes:

All we have left is the wedding, which is full of cracky, fluffy fun. That should be up Friday. Thank you for coming along on this ride with me! I have treasured every comment, like, reblog, and hit on this story. I hope you've enjoyed it. I'd love to hear your thoughts, either in a review or come find me on tumblr.

Chapter 6

Summary:

Wedding Time!!! Jemma and Fitz tie the knot with everyone looking on, and then have the happiest reception on the face of the planet.

Notes:

Seriously, it's 100% fluff. Gah, I love how happy this chapter is. Enjoy the tooth-rotting sweetness!!

This chapter is dedicated to my person, Cupcake. She helped me plan out all the details for the wedding and there are some easter eggs in here just for her.

And let's just all freak out about the BEAUTIFUL photo collage Evie made for this chapter. Because it deserves much freaking out. Isn't it AMAZING?! Go, swoon at her. (Also, I added the story collage she made to Chapter 1, so go swoon over that one too, especially now that you know the whole story!)

(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)

Chapter Text

 photo _wedding 3 copy.png

 

“Jemma,” Skye breathed out. “Gorgeous doesn’t even begin to describe it.”

“Really?” the bride asked, as if she couldn’t quite believe it.

“Oh hell yes,” confirmed Bobbi. “Fitz’s eyes are going to pop out of his head.”

“Which is going to be such a mess and totally delay everything as we pick them up off the floor and put them back in. We’ll have to rinse them off, otherwise he’ll have lint and dirt all over them. I mean, maybe we shouldn’t let you go out there like that. It’s really going to be a hazard, and we can’t have that messing up the ceremony. I did not squeeze myself into this dress to have my moment screwed up by you.” Skye winked at Jemma, making her laugh so hard, Skye finally saw her friend’s shoulders relax. Simmons had been so strung out, all morning, that Skye had made it her mission to relieve some of the tension.

“Well, we can’t have that, can we? I would hate to ruin your chance to be in the spotlight. What kind of friend would I be?” Simmons joked back.

The giggling was interrupted by a pointed sniff behind them. “If you are all quite finished, we have a wedding to attend,” Jemma’s sister admonished them.

“Oh, Bea. Leave us alone, we’re having a much needed laugh. Don’t worry, we’ll be properly solemn and dignified when the time comes,” Jemma rolled her eyes at the disapproving glare.

Skye and Bobbi tried valiantly to stifle their giggles. “Yes, yes, of course. We are grown ups, we swear,” the tall blonde assured.

There was a knock at the door, revealing Jemma’s parents. Her mother smiled approvingly, “You look beautiful, dear.”

“Thank you, Mum. What do you think, Dad?”

Mr. Simmons couldn’t do much more than beam while he struggled to hold back the tears from falling.

“Now, Jonathan,” Mrs. Simmons crooned. “Don’t you start with that, or I’ll be a mess too, and we’ll never get anywhere. And I, for one, can’t wait to see our little girl walk down that aisle.”

“You’re right, Millie.” He took a deep breath and turned to his daughter, offering her his arm, “You ready, sweet pea?”

“More than ever,” she said, accepting it.

“Wait!” cried her mother, causing everyone to look her in alarm. “You can’t go without your veil. This was your grandmother’s, sewn by her mother. I wore it, and now you.” Jemma waited patiently, while her mother gave her a peck on the cheek and pulled the veil over her face. “Perfect.”

“All right, everyone, move out!” Skye chirped. “Let’s get this gal hitched!”

 

Skye gave Jemma one last squeeze of the hand, before stepping through the doors and into the aisle. The purple satin swished around her legs and she smelled the freesias and lilies from the bouquet in her hands. She moved forward slowly, while looking around at everyone. She saw so many of her friends and acquaintances in the audience. Bobbi was up at the front by now, alongside Beatrice, just across from Fitz. He somehow managed to look both nervous and so excited he could burst at the same time. Hunter and Trip were both there, smiling brightly at her, looking as dashing as ever in their grey suits. And in the middle of them all was Ward. Their eyes met and her grin felt like it was about to crack her face in half. He looked like he was doing about the same. Skye felt like she was about to burst with happiness. Her best friends were getting their happily ever after. And it seemed like maybe hers was around the corner as well. She took her place next to Bobbi and turned with everyone else, as the wedding march began.

Jemma and her father stepped forward and started their walk to the altar. She was a breathtakingly beautiful bride. The lace gown was fitted through the bodice, then the skirt gracefully flowed away. Her hair hung down her back in soft curls, frosted by the delicate veil that had been in her family for generations. She was a vision in white, if there ever was one.

Skye hazarded a glance at Fitz to find him completely overcome by the sight of his bride. Tears were unabashedly falling down his cheeks. The love flowing between the two was nearly palpable. Upon reaching the altar, Mr. Simmons lifted his daughter’s veil, kissing her on the cheek, and put her hand in Fitz’s. The officiant welcomed everyone and invited them to sit. The words she spoke were heartwarming and celebratory of love and commitment.

When it was time for the vows, once again, Fitz had tears trickling down his face as he looked at Jemma with all the love in the world. “I, Leopold Kenneth Fitz, do take you, Jemma Kimberly Simmons, to be my lawfully wedded wife. I humbly give you my hand and my heart, as a sanctuary of warmth and peace, and pledge my faith and love to you. With this ring, I thee wed.”

Jemma gazed back, radiating warmth and joy, “I, Jemma Kimberly Simmons, do take you, Leopold Kenneth Fitz, to be my lawfully wedded husband. I humbly give you my hand and my heart, as a sanctuary of warmth and peace, and pledge my faith and love to you. With this ring, I thee wed.”

There was scarcely a dry eye in the room, as the two scientists exchanged vows. Skye dabbed at her eyes continuously, Hunter was openly sniffling, and even Ward tried to wipe his eyes discreetly.

“As you have pledged yourselves to each other, I know pronounce you: Husband and Wife. You may kiss the bride.”

Clapping thundered through the hall as Jemma and Fitz sealed their union with a kiss. Their unbridled smiles lit up the entire room.

Skye watched her best friends journey back down the aisle, marveling at how gorgeous they were together. She stepped forward to meet Ward, for the second time in 24 hours, but this time instead of guilt and hurt, she felt joy, love, and excitement. He looked back at her with such adoration, it almost made her stumble backwards.

Ward could hardly believe it, as she took his arm and gave him the most stunning smile he’d ever seen. That look was for him. He had always been astonished at her beauty, but right now, he was positive there had never been a more radiant and enchanting person on the earth. They walked out the hall together and he let himself wonder if someday, this could be them: Skye dressed in a white dress, him in a tuxedo, two shiny new rings, and all their loved ones clapping for them. He suddenly found himself wanting it more than anything he’d ever dreamed of.

 

The music played softly in the background, as Skye and Ward danced in the middle of the dance floor, holding each other close.

“Any clue as to why Bobbi is looking at you like you’re a mouse and she’s a lion about ready to pounce?” Ward asked.

Skye groaned. “Probably because she is. It’s not like it was exactly a secret that we weren’t getting along, and yet, here we are,” she gestured between them. “She’s probably dying to know what changed.”

He chuckled, “Do you want to fill her in now or let her squirm a little bit more?”

“Definitely squirm a little more. I have no desire to move right now.” She happily laid her head against his shoulder as they swayed.

A minute later Ward leaned in and whispered in her ear, “Let’s really give her something to freak out about.”

Skye just smiled and tightened her arms around his neck a little more, meeting his lips and giving him a sound kiss. She giggled as they each pulled back, just as the song was ending. “I think that was more than sufficient; pretty sure I heard her jaw hit the ground. Maybe I should go put her out of her misery. I am rather parched after all.”

“Oh, I’m sure you are,” he flirted. “Now go get yourself a drink and let Bobbi interrogate you.”

“If you insist. But if I come back and you’re not here with a plate of food for me, big trouble, Robot.”

“You got it, Rookie,” he said with a wink.

She walked over to the punch table, deliberately not looking at Bobbi, but knowing the blonde was going to make her move any second. Sure enough, she barely had time to pick up a glass before her friend grabbed her arm and dragged her to the corner of the room.

“Bobbi?! What the hell?” Skye exclaimed.

“Oh, get off it, Skye. I’ve been watching you two all day. The heart eyes you guys are throwing at each other have practically knocked down small children. What is going on? ‘Fess up, woman.”

Skye just blinked at her, then looked down at her shoes. “Ummm….. Well…..” A smile blossomed across her face. “We kinda made up last night.”

“You KINDA made up?!” Bobbi screeched.

“Shhh! Geez Bob, I don’t think they heard you the next state over.”

Bobbi simply rolled her eyes. “Whatever. I want details. Now.”

“Fine! Well, long story short, he talked to me at the rehearsal dinner, thanked me for the birthday present.” Bobbi raised her eyebrows at that, but Skye continued, “Later, I promise. Anyway, I told him we just had to make it through this weekend and we could go our separate ways and he said he didn’t want to. Then he pulled me into another room and he apologized and we argued a little, but then I finally got to the bottom of what is bothering him. So, basically, we made up.”

“And you weren’t going to tell anyone?!”

“Hey! I didn’t want to take away from FitzSimmons’ day! My personal drama has been enough of the focus lately, I didn’t want to steal the thunder on their wedding day.”

“Yeah, too late on that one. Like anyone can’t see what was going on.”

“And your point is?” Skye started getting defensive.

Bobbi grinned, “I’m so happy for you guys. That’s fabulous. Now, get your gorgeous self back over there and make everyone else stupidly jealous.” She wrapped up Skye in a hug.

Skye squeezed her back, “Love you, Bobbi.”

“Love you too, rock star.”

 

“If all the single ladies would come to the middle of the ballroom, it is now time for the bride to toss her bouquet,” the emcee announced.

“You gonna go?” Ward asked.

“Wasn’t planning on it,” Skye shrugged.

“Why not?”

“I don’t know. It seems kind of silly, jumping around, clawing other women just to get some flowers that will be dead in a few days.”

“Quite the romantic there, Skye,” Hunter butted in. “You won’t even have Bobbi out there to compete with. But I guess if you don’t think you can handle it, just stay back here where it’s safe.”

Ward whistled low as Skye’s eyes flashed fire. “I could totally take them all on if I wanted to.”

“Then why don’t you?”

“Fine, I will. And you will eat your words.” Skye marched off to the group gathering on the dance floor.

Hunter glanced over at Ward, “You’re welcome.”

Ward just laughed, “You did that on purpose, didn’t you?”

“That girl of yours is so predictable,” he drawled. “Plus, let’s be real here, it’s not going to be long until we’re all back here for you anyway.”

Ward choked on the water he was drinking. Hunter slapped him on the back and continued on, “Come on, mate. Don’t even pretend that wasn’t what you’ve been thinking all day.”

“And so what it if is?” said Ward defiantly.

“That’s exactly why I made her go out and get the bouquet. Now, watch as she demolishes everyone else.”

Everyone focused on the middle of the room as Jemma faced away from all the women. “One, two, three!” She called as the bouquet sailed over her head.

There was a lot of jumping, squealing, and a mad scramble, but sure enough, Skye emerged victorious, waving the flowers high. She made her way back to the table, dropping down next to Ward again. “Proud of me, baby?”

“Always,” he kissed her. “You know they’re never going to leave us alone now, right?”

“You got a problem with that?” She arched an eyebrow.

“Never,” he pulled her closer. “You’re stuck with me.”

“No one I’d rather be stuck with.”

Notes:

THE END.

THANK YOU SO MUCH from the bottom of my heart for coming along this journey with me. I appreciate everyone who took the time to read, to give kudos, to leave comments, and message me otherwise about it. I'm so glad that this gave you joy (and other feelings ;-)). Knowing there were people loving it brought me so much joy too. <3

Fun fact: I planned out pretty much all of the details to this wedding. Please come find me on tumblr if you're curious about the wedding details or anything else. I love it when new friends message me! Thank you again!!!!

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