Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

Today was the day. He'd do it today. He'd ask Dexter to join the computer… and get him to agree to join(!!!)

"Even though you've never been successful the last few times?" the reverberating voice of Jill asked him, but Todd waved that away– he took a deep breath, and forced a pep in his step. 

"Heeey… Dexter?"

Dexter didn't answer– oh, must be talking to Freakazoid. 

Todd cleared his throat. 

"Dexter?"

No answer. 

"... Dex… ter?" 

… He'd… he'd have to be a bit more forward, it seemed. Todd… tapped Dexter's shoulder–

"What?!" Dexter turned around with a quick motion. "... Oh, it's just you."

Todd tried not to sink into the floor. What did he mean by that…? "Ah, well… I had a question for you…" 

"... Yeah? " 

Dexter's tone wasn't a good sign– it may as well have been a no before anything was said. But still… he promised himself that he'd try! "Would… you… like… to…?"

Dexter stared, uninterested, but gestured for him to finish. 

"... Join the computer club? Please…?"

Todd wanted to believe that Dexter didn't just eye roll. 

"So, okay, Theodore, how much time do you think I have?" 

Todd raised a finger. 

" With the blue guy in my head?" 

… Todd lowered his hand. 

"So, yeah. I barely have enough time for my homework, and his heroing nonsense–"

"You have been doing good! Or, well, Freakazoid has…" 

"But. Do you really think I have time for your dumb club?" 

He probably didn't mean it that way. Dexter's expression said as much when he saw how Todd frowned. 

But it still hurt. 

"Ah, uh… I get it…"

Chapter Text

Dexter sat back, disgruntled as Todd played his video game. 

… "Uh, if I'm playing this game in a way that… bothers you… I can stop…," Todd said, meekly. 

"No, it's– it's not that," Dexter swore, "it's more, like– how are you so good at it?"

"... What do you mean?" 

"Like– the way you're playing it is effortless!! "

"... What do you mean? "

"Any time I play this game," Dexter explained– maybe, "I like, mess up and stuff."

"Well, that's normal…"

"So then I suck so bad I don't want to play anymore." 

"Aaah, that's your problem…"

Dexter wrinkled his nose. "Don't rub it in." 

"No– not that you suck–"

"Which I do."

"You don't practice!" 

"Why would you practice at a video game? "

"Do you play it a lot?"

"Uh… like every so often…"

"Do you take notice of what you do wrong?"

"How would I even do that?!" 

"Well… okay, play my game for a sec."

"Ugh, you're gonna regret this–" Dexter had the controller shoved in his hands. … Reluctantly, he moved through the level, and somewhat recognized it–

He fell into a pit. Dexter made a noise of frustration and near-flung the controller back at Todd. "There, are you happy?! You proved that I suck! "

… Todd took in a breath, "Well, what did you do in the game?"

"Other than I suck? " Dexter thought about it. "Well… I was walking around…"

"And?"

"And then I fought an enemy– I… I guess I did kind of good at that."

"And then what?" 

"... I was dumb and fell down the pit." 

Chapter Text

"So," Todd began in the voice call, "what I think we could do is go to AllDollz.com–"

"I remember that site," Jill commented. 

"I still use it sometimes," Angel said. 

"Eh… isn't it for little kids?" Dexter said dismissively.

"... But we go onto there, we select a game, and then we all show what we made and decide who had the best dress up."

"Isn't there something better we could do?"

"I'm in," Jill said. 

"That sounds like so much fun!" Angel piped in. 

"... Well, okay, if everyone else is doing it…," Dexter muttered reluctantly. 

"And we could each go and pick out a game in turns for each 'round'." Todd paused. "Dexter, if you select any of those… weird games, I'm killing you." 

"WHY DO YOU THINK I WOULD???"

"You might think it's funny."

"I wouldn't???"

"I'm glad you wouldn't," Angel said. 

"... Thanks, Angel," Dexter said. "At least SOMEONE believes in my INTEGRITY."

"The integrity on AllDollz.org," Jill commented. 

"It's an org now?!" Todd said in mock-disbelief. 

"Yeah, an important resource." 

"I'll randomly select what our turn order is," Todd said, and after a moment commented, "oh, Angel, you pick first!"

"Yay yay! I have the perfect one!"

–

The game that Angel selected was one where you clicked–and–dragged clothes onto a person– titled 'Diva Dressup'. 

"We each have five minutes," Todd instructed. 

"Only five?" Angel despaired. 

Chapter Text

Dexter panted as he came off the heat of a training session in Dr. Lobe's personal training room. 

"So…?" He asked with anticipation, looking up at Lobe through the glass. 

"Hm…," he seemed to be looking at data and metrics– things Dexter was sure he could understand, but preferred to leave to other people anyway, "... acceptable."

… Dexter stood, seeming disappointed by this answer. "Acceptable? Like– not fantastic, good? Great?"

"You seem to take umbrage with my wording."

"'Acceptable like… implies that I only just did good enough. Like I hit the bare minimum of failure, bad, failed…"

"That was another variation of falure."

"You get what I mean! … Right?"

"Well… you are… acceptable. I found no 'glitches' again with your powers, everything is stable– it was not necessarily a test of the efficiency of your current abilities, Dexter Douglas. It was to assure me and you that everything is working just as intended with that chip embedded into your chest."

Dexter touched where it was. "... I… guess you have a point, prof."

"Indeed I do. Now, if you would like to test your capabilities, I do promise you I have a number of training simulations I have put Erzatz through before."

Dexter grinned– sparks around him in excitement. "Yeah! Bring it on! "

"I will note, however, that all simulations are timed and have a programmed 'end point'. I cannot easily stop a training simulation without risk of damage to the device itself–"

"I'm sure I can handle whatever you throw at me."

"... Every simulation is also ranked in difficulty, one through five."

Chapter Text

It was a lovely day to have frozen yogurt, all things considered. 

"What's on your mind, dude?" 

Todd looked up at Jill's question. 

"... You don't have to tell me." 

"It's a distressing thought…," Todd admitted. 

"About Dex?" 

Todd stayed silent, as he stared into his mint yogurt. 

Jill just sighed, before she took another bite of her strawberry. 

"... Sometimes I wonder if Dexter even… likes me." 

"You'll never know if you don't–"

"Even as a friend." 

Todd worried about Jill's silence. 

"Do you want the reassuring answer, or the realistic one?" 

"... What's the… reassuring one?"

"Dexter has a hard time showing he cares and he's incredibly self-critical, which he projects onto other people. He probably does care a lot about it, but he uh, sucks at showing it." 

"And the realistic one…?"

"Dexter's a shitty friend." 

Todd's spoon clanged onto the table. He even looked around– as if Dexter might come in and hear that at that very moment. "Uh, isn't that… mean…? Why are you…?" 

"I still love the guy," Jill continued, "he's like a brother to me. But there's a reason why I never depend on him for anything. And I get why he's like that. But the older he gets the more that stops being a 'good' excuse." 

Chapter Text

Theodore wasn't used to the experience of being punched. Particularly because it had been the first time this happened. 

His body collided with the ground, the concrete, glasses askew. 

"Oh my god, Jeremy! " The girl said, in a tone (Todd couldn't tell which). "Why the hell did you do that?! What's wrong with you??" 

"Uh, don't you recognize him?" The supposed Jeremy said (unless it were another Jeremy who hit him). 

"Uh, no. I'm not cheating oh you, oh, my, god—"

"Noo, from this." And then Jeremy would show the video that was his infamy. His life now. It was attached to his soul– a heart everyone could see outside of his body. 

Theodore heard it— the 'pig like' squeals he'd made in that video. Not his own description– that was so generously provided by the streamer Freakazoid (if he's sounding it out proper) when he reacted to his video. 

When he forcibly made Theodore a patron saint of the internet. 

The woman looked at the video, and then at Theodore, a mix of pity, and now nervousness. 

"So, like," Jeremy continued, "I didn't want him getting, like, uh all weird at us." 

"But… I don't think he… would," the woman sounded hesitant. She did not look him in the eye. 

"Yeah, but," Jeremy continued, "you can never be sure with these weirdos. What if he like looked at your purse," he pointed to it– Theodore could tell what it was, a collector's item of a popular mascot, limited edition, only gotten physically in stores around last year in the month of March, if not in these circumstances he'd likely be able to pull up the date, "and like, start screaming and grabbing at it or something. Yeah."

Chapter Text

"So, there's a concrete theme here, right?" 

The Archivist looked at the inky form of a fox, its many eyes looking at him. 

"Well?"

"I was waiting for you to come to your conclusions on that–"

"Why would I say anything if I didn't want anyone else to SPEAK?" her words spit acid– literally, a few inches from one of his legs, it hissed. 

"... Our… 'theme'... being…," Theodore thought on it, "... we were all affected by the chip–"

"That's a connecting event, dumbass, " more acid, "what I mean is– Dexter."

"... Ah, I believe I see what you mean now–"

"Do you?" The creature– Valerie– Karma Kitsune– moved closer, her inky forehead twisting down to look at him multiple times, "do you REALLY understand me now, or should I explain it more for your tiny spider brain." 

"... Yes, I do," the Archivist said calmly.

"You see," the kitsune explained anyway, "we were all affected by him, in one way or another." She spoke as if the Wolf was here. 

She had better things to do. The Archivist would too, but useless information is still information. 

"You were humiliated by him." 

…

The Archivist could not deny that. 

"He twisted your actions until they became a parody of that. I think I'd be happy seeing him be a smear– no, better than that, still alive–"