Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

Sunburst already missed the siblings, even after just a couple of days of them being gone, though he could tell Cadance and Shining were almost beside themselves. They all were receiving plenty of letters from the two, but it wasn't the same as the usual random sounds the kids would make throughout the day. But he had something to do to try to help Varian's quest, and that was learning what he could about Skyros, pre-Equestrian pony tribes, anything he could find out about Grogar or any other alias that being used. Something in the recesses of his eidetic memory was practically screaming at him, but it wasn't something he'd actively read, maybe an open book he'd peeked at while passing someone else. He hadn't noticed how many hours he spent in the library until he realized he wasn't alone, looking up from his book and letting out an embarrassingly shrill scream as he spotted the glowing red eyes looking back at him, his horn glowing bright orange as his fear raised. He remembered the castles newest resident and calmed down, taking a few deep breaths as he relaxed.

"Sombra, sorry. When did it get so dark in here?" Sunburst asked, looking around the darkened library.

"You've not moved in three hours. I was curious when you'd get up on your own. Your focus is very impressive." Sombra admitted. "Luna raised the moon two hours ago."

"Oh. I guess I was really focused on my reading." Sunburst admitted. "But I think I'm getting close to a breakthrough. See, Varian and his friends gave me an interesting hypothesis, that is where the sundrop and moonstone's magic came from. It's natural ambient magic given a form unnatural to itself, which is why the moonstone was so upset for so long. The sundrop, on the other hoof, was totally accepting of it's new form. I tried hard to think of what the difference was and I think I'm onto something."

"Ah… the celestial magic may be the magic that used to move the sun and moon in our world." Sombra surmised, Sunburst nodding.

"And the reason it looked like a star falling from the sky is it must have found one of the natural portals in the sky." Sunburst explained, drawing on a chalk board. "Now, solar and lunar magic doesn't really need to be connected which helps explain why it broke apart when it was ripped from the fabric of our reality. But something bothered me about the sundrops appearance and powers. We've never seen solar and floral magic tied together like that. Celestia isn't exactly well known for flowers growing wherever she goes. So I think-" Sunburst paused as he recalled just who he was talking at, Sombra didn't particularly look bored but it was unclear if he was listening. "Oh uh… sorry, I'm rambling, you probably have better things then to listen to me."

"If I wanted you to stop talking I would have stopped you myself." Sombra said, before pausing. "That came out wrong. I'm still learning not to 'talk like an evil king' as Radiant would put it. I am invested in your theories. Please continue."

"Oh well, don't worry I'm still not very good at social interaction either. I spent a long time as a homebody." Sunburst admitted. "Well, I think the sundrop also contained some of Equestria's floral magic. But unlike the moonstone and sundrop, the floral magic didn't end up in the other realm."

"Ah, it was found by the Flutter ponies who then took up the mantel of using it to keep nature's balance." Sombra smiled as he understood. "And it staying in our world as long as it did gave pegasi and earth ponies a chance to pick up the pieces, while unicorns worked on the celestial magic."

"Exactly. For the time being, I'm going to refer to the Flutter pony crystal as the sunstone. It's not the most fitting name considering I don't know how much it had to do with the sun if anything, but being the third of the magic artifacts created when Zhan Tiri, or at least what I assume was Zhan Tiri, attempted to rip it out of the fabric of our reality, taking the stone from moonstone and sun from sundrop is the only idea I could think of." Sunburst smiled.

"I think its good enough." Sombra nodded, before he frowned. "This has been going on for so long, right under all of our noses…"

"There's a chance that the crystal you came from, you and the other umbrum, might have also been tied to it. The Crystal Heart too." Sunburst admitted, Sombra nodding.

"Light and Darkness, positive and negative emotional energy… It sounds like it was likely once one thing before as well. The fact our world survived whatever Zhan Tiri did likely irked them." Sombra thought for a moment. "But then, when Varian gets the moonstone, will that really be enough to prevent them for getting it back?"

"I'm not sure. The problem is that this Zhan Tiri is very good at manipulation." Sunburst admitted with a sigh. "But we know we can't risk them, or anyone working for them, getting a hold of it or its power."

Sombra nodded, "Well… as impressive as your studying has been, you should go eat something and get some sleep. I'll look through the archives and see if I can't find anything you might parse through for more information."

"Oh uh, alright. Thank you." Sunburst smiled a bit. "I know you don't need much sleep but try to get some yourself too, alright?"

Sombra just nodded, before he began to do as he promised and look around the library. Sunburst decided that the interaction was very positive, all things considered, and left to get some dinner. Sombra was capable of doing some referencing and cross referencing, Sunburst was sure of that much.

The first few days had gone well, for the most part. Varian, Cozy and Flurry spent a lot more time in the air then he'd ever anticipated, and as his mom had warned him flying was a physical activity that made him voraciously hungry. He landed carefully next to Tempest, who smiled at him as he nearly tripped over his own hooves. She was pulling the wagon on her own, having Tempest alongside them meant Trixie and Starlight could actually take breaks from time to time. Which was good, it let Trixie help him one on one every once in a while. He'd avoided snapping at Rapunzel thus far, and he was hoping that everything would be okay.

"Still coming in a little too fast." She said. "You okay?"

"Yeah. Just hungry again." Varian sighed. "I swear Flurry never complains about being this hungry…"

"Well, Flurry is used to that level of physical activity." Tempest mentioned. "Go inside and get a snack. I think we're going to have to stop for more food anyway."

"Already? But it's only been almost a week." Varian tilted his head.

"I guess that the Coronans underestimated how much food the princess could eat." Tempest said simply. "Lance said they were almost out of food, we're heading to somewhere called Vardaros. Lance and Eugene seem excited about it."

Varian felt a little suspicious about that, but he shook it off before he headed inside the wagon. Hugo was sat down tinkering again, Olivia was skittering around the table and handing Hugo tools, and Varian used his pearl before grabbing an apple and sitting next to him.

"How was the sky today?" Hugo asked.

"The same as yesterday. Wind is kind of cold, sun is warm. Flying is fun, and I am completely wiped out." Varian admitted, scooting his chair closer. "So what are you working on?"

"Eh, just tinkering on some new parts for Liv. I hate not having anything to do, but until we get new information I dunno what else to do." Hugo admitted. "You know we're supposed to stop for lunch soon right?"

"Trust me, I'll eat that too." Varian admitted.

"Yeah? Guess flying is hungry work." Hugo smiled a bit, before he turned to look at him. "So any idea where we're heading first?"

"Vardaros. We need supplies? I guess they're going through food fast." Varian admitted.

"Vardaros? That's bold of Eugene." Hugo admitted.

"What makes you say that?" Varian tilted his head.

"Well, he's got a history, one I'm sure we'll hear about from someone in Vardaros." Hugo mentioned. "And I don't really mean the uh thieving thing, I mean exes."

Varian hummed, about to ask Hugo for clarification when something when the wagon stopped, Starlight calling to them, "Boys, it's lunch time."

"Good because I'm still starving." Varian admitted.

He and Hugo stepped out of the wagon, unsurprised that Cass and the others were stretching. Hugo did too, Varian was the only one aside from Flurry and Cozy who had a very easy way to stretch. Tempest, Trixie and Starlight at least could walk, and Ruddiger was able to scramble around the wagon without issue, though the raccoon was more then a little lazy.

"Oh look more ravens." Flurry said, looking up at the sky.

"Hm." Trixie looked at Eugene. "You used to feed them or something?"

"No. Why?"

"Well because they remember people they like. And people they hate. But, they clearly seem to like you." Trixie said.

"… Why do you know so much about ravens?" Eugene asked.

"I've known Fluttershy for over a decade now." Trixie answered.

"You'd be surprised what Trix can pick up just by listening to about half of the conversations she's in." Starlight teased, Trixie smiling at her.

"… Is that a charm point for you?" Eugene tilted his head, shaking it and sighing. "Hey, kid, mind helping me get some wood for a fire for lunch?"

Varian froze. He didn't want or mean to, but he began to panic at the familiar term from Eugene.

"… Me?" Varian finally squeaked out.

"… I mean, I was talking to you, but I guess 'kid' could refer to you or Flurry." Eugene admitted. "Or Hugo if I was feeling generous."

"Right uh- firewood." Varian quickly hurried off.

"… Well that's progress!" Trixie smiled. "Much better then the agitation he was showing before."

"I mean I am glad about that but I'm still so confused." Eugene admitted. "I mean he still clearly is… I don't know, afraid of me? And I really wish he wasn't. I already feel terrible, seeing him nervous to talk to me makes it much worse."

"He's working through something." Trixie said, digging in their supplies.

"And that something is?" Eugene asked.

"Can't tell you. It's up to him when or if he wants to talk about it." Trixie said, looking as a raven landed nearby. "… I think they're stealing your garbage."

"What?!" Eugene turned, watching as the bird flew away. "What did it take?"

"I don't know." Trixie shrugged. "Hugo, how does a salad sound?"

"I could eat a salad." Hugo nodded, looking back into the glass of the window.

"… You good?" Eugene asked.

"I dunno. I never really let my hair grow too long because it tangles pretty easy. That's what the undercut was for, and I kept it the same length as long as I could remember. I… didn't want it to get stuck in anything…" Hugo admitted, rubbing his upper arm where the mechanics connected.

"Oh… Yeah, that makes sense." Eugene admitted.

"Well, changing that style because you feel safer is okay, as long as it's what you want." Trixie said.

"I think I do. It's just uh… I dunno." Hugo muttered, shaking his head. "I'm going to go look for Varian and help him find that firewood, since Rider scares him so bad."

Hugo hurried off, leaving Eugene to sigh, "And there's the walls again."

"He still does that to almost everyone, don't take that too personally." Tempest insisted.

"I know I know." Eugene sighed. "Any idea what that's about though?"

"Vari complimented his hair and he's been kind of looking at his reflection different since." Flurry answered.

"Ah, he got his first real compliment from someone who really matters and it's causing feelings. Been there." Eugene admitted. "Alright well uh… since they're getting wood I guess I'll do something else…"

Varian felt very, very embarrassed about how he'd reacted to Eugene. He'd been working on not acting out in anger just because he felt afraid of something that he knew Eugene wouldn't do, he knew it was unfair. But being awkward around the man was almost worse.

"Come on Varian pull it together… He probably won't even care." Varian muttered to himself.

That only strangely made it worse. They were cousins. Varian was Eugene's family, the only family that they knew Eugene had. That only made Varian feel worse, to know he knew something that would mostly likely mean something to Eugene. That he'd been withholding that information for a month, information he felt that Eugene deserved to know. But what Eugene had said about Varian 'giving a human family a try' kept ringing in his ears. Varian sighed as he picked up another fallen branch, pausing as he realized something. He had the very distinct feeling he was being watched.

He stood up, starting to walk back to the caravan without making it known he knew he wasn't alone. He began to run as quickly as possible as soon as he was sure he was being followed, nearly crashing into Hugo.

"Someone is chasing me!" He hurriedly shouted, Hugo turning and running after throwing something down.

Based on the cursing behind him, Varian had to assume Hugo threw down some kind of trap. The voice sounded familiar, but Varian was too panicked to think on it as he and Hugo made it back to the others.

"What's wrong?" Cass asked, quickly unsheathing her sword.

"Didn't see who, but someone is out there." Hugo answered.

Rapunzel jumped up and grabbed a pan, stepping in front of Varian. Before he could complain he didn't need her to protect him, Flurry landed suddenly, causing a small tremor on the ground as she turned toward the woods with her horn glowing. Cozy landed behind Cass and Lance, but the filly was watching carefully.

"Woah there, calm down. It's just me." The familiar voice said again, before the woman stepped out.

"Ugh. Adira." Hugo sighed, crossing his arms.

"Adira?" Cass raised an eyebrow. "The lady who almost got Varian killed by not minding her own business?"

"… That seems like a harsh way to put that." Adira said.

"Well that's how I see it." Hugo crossed his arms.

"And I don't appreciate people going behind my back to use my alchemy against my friends." Varian added. "So you can just go."

"I know the last time we saw each other things didn't go quite as well as they could have-" Adira started.

"You tried to trick my boyfriend into drinking a truth serum!" Varian snapped. "What, if you had your way do you think it all would have been fine? I knew Hugo hadn't told me everything, he was scared. I know what he was working up to tell me now."

Adira paused, looking between the two for a while before she relaxed, "I suppose you do. He looks a lot more confident now."

"I was plenty confident." Hugo huffed. "And we do not need you on the road with us. You were more then a little unpleasant to travel with the first time."

"Go away." Flurry huffed.

Clearly, she didn't like all the negativity Adira's presence caused. Varian knew he had complicated feelings about the woman, and he was sure that Hugo's feelings were very negative about her.

"… Are you going to the moonstone?" Adira asked, looking at Varian.

"In time. But there's answers we need to find on the way." Varian said. "And like Hugo said… you were very unpleasant company before."

"I did tell you about your father." Adira reminded.

"Yeah. And I can appreciate that and be upset about how you treated my friend. Friends, really. You got into Sunset's stuff without permission too." Varian crossed his arms. "I'm not going to forgive Frederic for what he did just because he's also told me stories about Quirin. It's not that simple."

"Well I hope you don't consider me to be that bad. Fine then, I'll go. But I'll be back. You'll need my help." Adira shrugged, stepping around them to circle the group. "Before you had that air ship. Traveling by foot, well, that's a lot more dangerous."

"If your referring to Hector, I'm not afraid." Varian interrupted, stopping Adira in her tracks. "Something tells me you aren't that good of judge of character, so when we inevitably run into him, I'm going to give him a chance. He's just as much family as you are."

Adira shook her head, "Hector is barely a human-"

"Being a human doesn't matter much to me. Almost everyone whose ever hurt me has been a human." Varian countered. "Hector is doing what he thinks is best to protect people from the moonstone. You're just mad he didn't agree with you about neutralizing the moonstone and sundrop."

"… So what were you two planning to do if not that?" Adira asked.

"So you were willing to sacrifice him is what I'm hearing." Cass said, glaring at the woman.

"Just ignore her, Cass. We're having lunch and moving on." Tempest said, looking over at Adira. "If I were you, I'd make myself scarce. Because, if Cass is right, as his aunt, I'm liable to show you what I can do."

"… Do you really think there's another way?" Adira asked, looking at Varian and Rapunzel.

"Yeah. I do." Varian confirmed.

"I know Varian is right." Rapunzel added. "Equestria knows way more about magic then Corona does, even if Varian never took a lot of interest in magic classes before he would know more then most people here about magic just from hearing it from everyone else."

"Some creatures would call that social osmosis. Where someone learns something just because its a part of the culture they are a part o-" Varian started, pausing once he saw Rapunzel looked excited. "… What?"

"Nothing! I mean, that's very interesting." Rapunzel said, pulling herself together quickly.

It was the first time in what felt like forever that Varian explained something or gave her a random fun fact. It felt like forward progress, even if Varian looked confused by her sudden joy.

"… Anyway, yeah, we're going to try things our way." Varian said. "And I'm not willing to travel with you because I don't trust you at all, you were very rude to my boyfriend, got into peoples personal belongings, and frankly we have enough people to keep track of."

Rapunzel nodded, before she looked around, then at Varian, "Where's Lance?"

"… Seriously? How did he- he's the biggest one of us." Varian sighed.

"Yeah he's like eight feet tall." Flurry looked around.

"Okay I know you know he's not that tall." Hugo chuckled a little.

"Maybe he went to get firewood since obviously you were chased out of the woods." Eugene mentioned, looking around.

They began to look around, finding Lance standing around the back on the wagon.

"There you are." Eugene raised an eyebrow. "What's uh… what's up with you?"

"Oh, nothing. Hey, let's go ahead and get that lunch made." Lance insisted, turning the group around.

Varian was sure he was hiding something, but he didn't really want to press it. He just wanted to focus on eating and getting a move on again, and getting away from Adira.

"Do you think that lady is following us?" Flurry asked, peeking over her hammock down at them.

Varian couldn't bring himself to hang out with everyone else once the wagons had stopped for the day, not for too long. He'd managed to spend a few hours with the others here and there, he always spent time with them for lunch, but usually by the end of the day he was too tired to fake niceties. And with how he'd been around Rapunzel and Eugene he was trying not to snap at them when they weren't doing anything wrong.

"Adira? She better not be." Hugo huffed.

"She almost for sure is." Varian admitted. "I don't think she'll do anything. I mean, she wants us to go to the moonstone. If anything she'll just be really annoying when we make other stops."

"But… if she's in the Brotherhood, that means she's like family to you, right?" Flurry asked.

"Well, sometimes… sometimes family hurts you and you can't just move on easy from that." Varian wasn't sure he was explaining right, thus far in their life all their family had been good. "Adira almost got me killed, and while it wasn't her intention, she did intend on forcing Hugo to tell the truth when he wasn't comfortable doing that."

"Yeah, okay." She thought for a moment. "But… what about Hector? Is he family?"

"Well, I think so. I remembered something Hue, when I fell? I didn't hit the ground because Hector caught me. At least I think he did… I mean I did hit my head hard. Sure, I was a pony but… I mean if I'm right, and if he stuck around to make sure I wasn't alone, then he knew it was me." Varian explained.

"… Think Sunset stayed outside the trail chamber to talk to him?" Hugo asked, sitting up.

"Oh hey, yeah. Yeah that makes sense." Varian confirmed. "I really wish Sunset would have waited a little bit so we could talk to her a little. Well, I know we won't be seeing him for a while but… I want to try to talk to him. Not just about Quirin, but… I mean if I were him I'd be lonely, after all this time."

"Especially if we assume everyone or even just most people act like Adira does around him. Seems like makin' connections wasn't easy for him. I know how that feels." Hugo said, crossing his arms. "But he might be dangerous to the rest of us. I don't think he'll hurt you, but if he's takin' that oath seriously…"

"I know. I'm working on a plan." Varian admitted. "And working on how and if I'm going to tell Eugene before we get to the Dark Kingdom. I mean… I guess it's his heritage too…"

"… WAIT WHAT?" Flurry moved to stand but instead fell out of her hammock. "EUGENE IS-"

"Ssh!" Varian shushed her, jumping to catch her. "I uh… I guess I forgot to tell you… Eugene and I are cousins, I guess."

"Which gives me so many questions… None of which anyone can answer." Hugo admitted.

"Eugene is family too?" Flurry asked, Varian nodding after a moment. "And he doesn't even know?"

"I haven't told him for a reason. A… mostly good reason." Varian insisted.

"And that reason is?" Flurry raised an eyebrow, Varian sighing.

"… When everything bad that happened happened, Eugene said something that sounded like he thought I should have been raised by humans. I don't know how much he meant it, and he seems sorry but… I'm afraid. I'm afraid he'll… I don't know, insist on something if he finds out we're blood related." Varian admitted quietly.

"I get that fear V, really but… I mean, he knows about your uncle Ulf and aunt Martha now." Hugo said it carefully, knowing that Varian could be volatile about this issue. "He hasn't said anything about you 'needing' to go with them. Only thing he said about them was a joke about how much you all look the same. Which is fair honestly Ulf and Ulla's genetics are pulling a lot of weight."

Varian chuckled a little, aware of just how similar he looked to his cousins. Especially Amber, it was more clear since they were almost the same age. The only thing he seemed to inherit from his fathers side were his darker hair and skin, at least as far as he could tell at a glance that was all.

"I like our new cousins." Flurry smiled, before looking at Varian. "But don't you think Eugene might like to know he has family too?"

"I don't know. I mean, I'd think so but…" Varian sighed. "I'll tell him soon. I promise."

"You might feel better once you do." Hugo admitted. "You know Flurry, you usually don't hang out with us in here during the evening. Something wrong?"

"I guess I was just curious about that lady, and Hector. And Cozy Glow is acting all weird. Suspicious. I mean, like she's suspicious of something not that she's acting suspicious." Flurry explained.

"Probably Lance. He's acting weird." Hugo admitted.

"You thought so too?" Varian sighed. "I was hoping I was just… well, a little paranoid because of everything that happened. Lance helped us before, I can't imagine him doing something-"

Flurry seemed concerned and looked out the window, Varian realizing his sister was acting suspicious immediately.

"… Flurry, do you know something?" Varian asked.

"… Uh… noooo." She averted her gaze, fooling neither of the teenage boys.

"Are you lying? Badly?" Hugo asked, smiling a little. "This is what happens when your taught to be honest by Applejack huh?"

"Lance said it was a secret." Flurry muttered.

"What kind of secret?" Varian asked.

"… Um… A friend kind of secret. A secret between friends." Flurry looked up, but it was clear neither Hugo nor Varian really bought that.

"Flurry, what is it?" Varian knelt down to her level.

"I can't tell you! You'll tell the others." Flurry insisted.

"Sounds like it's the kind of thing that shouldn't be a secret." Hugo mentioned, crossing his arms.

"Flurry, if this somehow is related to something serious that is going to cause problems down the road, we and the others need to know." Varian tried gently, but Flurry gave him a look.

"Like Eugene being related?"

"… I'm going to tell him, eventually. The only reason I haven't is because Eugene hurt me in the past and I'm struggling to trust him." Varian countered.

"But if you tell him, then you'll have a stronger bond he won't want to break, right?" Flurry asked.

"Well I don't- you are trying to change the subject." Varian sputtered, catching himself after a moment.

"Does this have something to do with the food?" Hugo asked.

"… Tangentially." Flurry muttered.

"Tangentially? What are you a dictionary, since when- Flurry, is Lance feeding that food to someone who isn't supposed to be here?" Varian asked, raising an eyebrow.

"Ummm."

They all heard a loud snap of some kind along with a startled shriek, Flurry looking more worried as they hurried outside. Cozy Glow had evidently set up a trap, a trap that had successfully snared two familiar forms as they exited the food storage of the Coronan wagons.

"You brought the girls?!" Starlight was angrier then Varian had ever seen her before.

Keira and Catalina were sitting nearby, Keira had her arms crossed as though she was annoyed while Catalina looked remorseful. Eugene looked about as upset as Starlight, though he wasn't saying anything. Rapunzel clearly was fighting the urge to try to get everyone to get along. Cozy was still pretty proud about her trap and how well it had gone, which Varian couldn't blame her really considering. It was almost a miracle that Ruddiger, Max, or Pascal hadn't set it off before it could get the girls. Trixie was watching with what could only be considered amusement, sharing cinnamon nuts with Hugo and Cass who seemed to just be letting Starlight handle it. Tempest, she was just watching with her usual neutral expression. Varian was standing nearby, having already given Flurry a piece of his mind about hiding the fact they had two children with them unknowingly, the filly staring at the ground. Varian hated arguing with his sister, but he really could not believe that she hid this.

"Now hold on, I can explain." Lance insisted.

"Oh please do, I'd love to hear this." Starlight huffed.

Lance opened his mouth as if to speak, but the length of time he took made it clear he was struggling to think of an excuse.

"Lance!" Starlight snapped.

"I'm thinking! Your so angry-"

"Because we're on a dangerous quest and you brought a couple of little kids!" Starlight gestured at the girls angrily.

"Flurry and Cozy got to come!" Keira spoke up.

"Flurry can take out a kingdom in a heartbeat." Eugene said. "And Cozy Glow caught you, so I think we can safely say she can handle herself. And she has her very scary older sister here just in case."

Cass nodded with a small smile, clearing her throat, "And, Flurry and Cozy are both older then you two."

"Barely!" Keira countered.

"Why did you two want to come anyway?" Rapunzel asked.

Catalina opened her mouth to answer, but Keira gave her a look before answering herself.

"A big epic adventure? Who wouldn't want to go?"

"… I don't think I believe you." Varian admitted. "But something tells me pulling the truth out of you two is going to be impossible."

"Great. Now we need to turn back and take them back-" Starlight sighed, rubbing her face.

"Now hold on, I'm their guardian, and I decided it was okay to bring them." Lance interrupted.

"You- You have got to be kidding." Starlight looked at Lance. "We're going to be attacked by witch hunters, sooner or later, almost for certain. Then there's Zhan Tiri's minions. The alicorn. Is any of this ringing a bell?"

"Oh come on Starlight, they survived working for the Baron and helping every creature from Ponyville survive in the Everfree Forest." Lance picked up the girls, nodding in self assurance. "And I will keep them safe."

Before Starlight could argue, Tempest spoke up, "Fine then. Then you will be responsible for them. Keeping them safe, keeping them fed, keeping them out of trouble and dealing with whatever trouble they get into. Because if your responsible for them, then your responsible for their actions."

"Fine, fine." Lance sighed. "Do you have to be so serious about everything?"

"You should be more serious. Those girls count on you." Tempest said, turning and heading back to the campfire. "At least now we know why the supplies were being gone through so much. Now we can adjust for the two extra mouths."

Varian didn't really want to turn around and go back to Corona, so he had to accept that outcome.

"They aren't sleeping in my bed." Cozy said as they headed back to the fire.

"Oh come on, you don't even use all that space." Lance said. "There has to be something I can do to get you to share."

Varian listened idly to the pleading and promises Lance gave to Cozy before she eventually accepted some kind of bargain. He wasn't really listening to what by that point, he was instead reading the letters he'd received that day.

"That seems like a lot more then usual." Hugo mentioned.

"Aunt Pinkie sent me a long letter about all the things little Cheese and Apple Spice did the past few days. And three other letters just about things that happened in Ponyville." Varian smiled a little. "Of course right now little Cheese and Apple Spice are just doing normal baby things so… sleeping and eating mostly."

"Well they'll be up on their hooves before you know it." Trixie said. "And we all know Pinkie gets a little… extra when it comes to things like this. She just misses you."

"Mom and dad just responded to our letter yesterday. We need to write them another one… and maybe ask them to tell Cheerilee where the girls are just in case." Varian said, looking over where Flurry was still quietly staring at her dinner.

He hated seeing his sister like this, they almost never really argued about anything so when they were at odds they struggled to bounce back. He thought for a moment before he leaned over and poked her cheek gently with the back of his pen.

"Hey… I'm not mad at you, okay?" Varian asked, Flurry looking at him. "But since we are on a big, dangerous quest, you need to tell me stuff like this."

"I know. I'm sorry." Flurry gave him a small smile, before her eyes flicked over to Eugene.

Varian knew she wasn't pushing him to talk to him to Eugene, in fact the filly moved on instead to write her own letter back to their parents. It was just a silent question, one she was probably asking herself more then him. A question he wasn't really sure he had an answer to himself, still, despite him grappling with it for a month now.

After dinner, Varian tried to go right to bed, but he found himself struggling to. Even once he could tell by the sounds of their gentle breathing that Hugo and Flurry had fallen asleep, and by Starlight's snoring and Trixie's sleep talking through the wall. He seemed to be the only one awake, so he got up as quietly as he could and slipped out of the caravan. He looked up at the sky as he sat down on a tree stump, the little lights of the stars and the moon making it clear enough for him to see fairly well. He wasn't sure how long he sat there quietly trying to parse through his thoughts before he heard something, a consistant little sound he couldn't quite place. He moved toward it as quietly as he could, before he spotted a little lantern light and realized the sound was the pen Rapunzel had, the woman was drawing.

"Rapunzel?" He spoke up before he could think about it, jumping a bit as he startled her.

"Varian!" She sighed in relief. "Did I wake you up?"

"Oh, no. I couldn't sleep. Uh… not because of that." Varian paused for a moment for Starlight's snore to make his point. "I guess I just… I don't know. What about you?"

"I couldn't sleep either. I don't really know why… maybe it's the sundrop and moonstone?" She offered.

"Hm, could be." Varian admitted. "I mean, we don't know a lot about them yet still…"

"Uh… while we're alone, there's something that was bothering Eugene. You don't have to tell me anything, obviously, but… Eugene is worried that you seem like your afraid of him." Rapunzel mentioned.

Varian wasn't sure how it had been coming across to Eugene, but his conclusion made sense. It was also technically correct, though now that he knew Eugene knew he was afraid of the man in some it only made him feel worse.

"It's not that I'm exactly afraid of him." Varian muttered. "It's… complicated. I… I know logically he wouldn't do anything. It's…"

"You don't have to tell me if you're not comfortable. I was just worried, it seemed like things between you two got worse not better and we didn't really know why. Uh… unlike before. Sorry. Eugene told me that we accidentally crashed a few dates?" Rapunzel looked at him sheepishly.

"Uh… Yeah. But it's not like you knew, I was annoyed but not mad." Varian admitted. "It's just… hard for me to be open with you now. I know I need to be… I'm working on it."

"I know you spent most of it away from us today but… you seemed to be more yourself today." Rapunzel admitted. "Not as angry and only a little afraid."

Varian wasn't sure what to respond to that with, but it did make him feel better to hear that there was some kind of visible way for them to see he was healing, at least a bit. He did think of something Trixie had told him just the day before, and he decided to pass that explanation and a bit of that talk he'd had with the mare to Rapunzel. He sat down somewhat close to her, though still a little bit away from her, and he was pretty sure he noticed her perk up. She really seemed happy with any amount of positive interactions with him, but he couldn't be upset about that. She hated when people weren't happy, he knew it would extend to him too.

"That's the goal, I think. To have more 'good days' then 'bad days', at least that's how Trixie put it. Sometimes I wake up and I see you guys and I'm angry immediately and even I know that's not healthy so I stay away because I… I don't like hurting you guys or snapping at you or any of that. It's just… some kind of survival instincts or something acting up, to keep me safe. But other days I wake up and its easier to remember how things were before. I know you and Eugene are good people, just with… some issues that made it harder for you to stand by me against Frederic. You because you went into your own survival mode, trying to make your parental figure happy because it was easier and safer. Eugene, he was afraid of what Frederic might do to him, he'd already almost been executed, I understand all that and I know you wouldn't do that again but… I don't know." Varian sighed. "It feels stupid."

"It's not, Varian. Emotions are just… complicated." Rapunzel admitted. "I know there were… are times I feel stupid for things that feel complicated but shouldn't be."

"… Like?" Varian looked over at her.

"… Sometimes, I miss her. Gothel. And I feel so stupid for that. She kidnapped me. She killed Eugene, he's only still here because of the sundrop. She was going to use me to keep herself young forever. She mistreated me and gave me all kinds of issues and behaviors including the ones that hurt you but…" Rapunzel sighed.

"… But she still raised you. She was the only person you knew for eighteen years. I get it." Varian admitted. "I can't imagine what you went through…"

"… I know if there's anything I could do or say to help you feel safe around us again, I'd do it in a heartbeat." Rapunzel offered.

"… You kind of did. I mean, I heard how you spoke to Frederic during the trial. I think I just need time around you, when I'm comfortable with it." Varian admitted. "And to work though… what's currently going on with me and Eugene. Which is a personal issue right now."

Rapunzel nodded, giving him a small smile, "Any time you want to spend together, just let me know. We have a long road ahead so it's not like we don't have time."

"I will. Well uh… I'm going to try to get some sleep." Varian got up, brushing himself off. "Good night, Rapunzel."

"Good night Varian. Sweet dreams." Rapunzel smiled a little watching him leave.

She knew it was just a single 'good day', that Varian might be cold or angry or just plain unavailable the next day, but after what felt like months of only 'bad days', she was just glad to see a little bit of the boy she knew before.