Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

lit candles, soft skin, acoustics on the turntable, red wine, rolling around on satin sheets, rosy cheeks, ruffled hair, a hot bath, scattered red rose petals, talks of the past in the darkness, deep and passionate kisses that render one breathless

Chuuya's wet fingers pinched the small flame emitting from the candle, repeating the action until you could no longer see his bare body standing over the claw foot tub the two of you had just shared. 

"Doesn't that hurt?" You hung onto the door frame, listening to rather small feet shuffling through the rose petals that the owner of those feet had so generously scattered through the loft. The sound of clinking wine glasses grew closer until a hand emerged from the darkness to grip your hip and pull you against the body attached to it.

"I've felt worse." A smooth voice answered, also attached to the hand that was no leading you to king sized bed that you also shared with the red-headed man. The two of you dressed in comfortable silence and clothes, you flopping back onto the bed when you were finished and Chuuya leaving to refill the wine glasses.

"You know, we've probably had enough wine. You're already a little buzzed." You pointed out, earning a 'tch' from your fiancee.

"It's a time to celebrate. I haven't had a day off in months. Let alone, a rainy day off. Rain pairs well with a bottle of '76 Domaine Moine." He retorted, setting the glasses of wine on the nightstand next to the bed. He turned away from the glasses to let his eyes roam over the rise and fall of your chest and the way your skin seemed to glide so nicely over the satin sheets with each minute movement of yours.

Have you got color in your cheeks ?

Smiling lips, soft and red, drew nearer to yours until they were pressed against them as your favorite acoustic slipped from the turntable; Chuuya wasted no time in parting your lips with his tongue and letting it take over your mouth. His rosy locks fell around his equally rosy cheeks to fall upon your own. Teeth scraped and pulled at your bottom lip, and Chuuya flung his hand out to the nightstand, reaching for something that could only be found in the drawer, but instead his hand knocked over a glass of wine.

Ignoring the dull sound of glass on carpet, Chuuya managed to get the drawer open without separating his lips from yours, but knocking over the other glass in the process, this time, it fell onto the love seat usually let alone. 

Spilling drinks on my settee...

Chapter Text

slow dancing, missteps, black rugs and white walls,  black coffee,  a smile lost in the dark but found by the light, soft chuckles and pinched cheeks, a fireplace with purpose, being held tight to a chest, kisses filled with longing and relief

Dazai could remember a time when he was depressed and quite lost. He normally had to keep the air that he knew exactly what he was doing and that he knew exactly how his life would turn out, just in case anyone ever had any doubts. The reason why no one could ever truly hate Dazai was because he provided a stability for everyone he met, in the most unstable way.

But who would provide that same stability for Dazai?

I can't explain but I want to try ...

Realization touched him as light as a feather as he was holding one of your hands in one of his and supporting your back with his other hand. You provided that stability for him. Even as he was here, supporting you as the two of you swayed back and forth to nonexistent music wafting along with the scent of abandoned black coffee, you were the one keeping him on his feet and in his right mind. Dazai smiled.

I'm not sure if I should show you what I've found...  

The fireplace provided just enough light in the stormy darkness from outside to unveil the small smile that had graced Dazai's lips and that Dazai had hoped to keep hidden in the darkness of your shoulder. 

"What's so funny? It's not my fault that I keep stepping on your toes. You're a lousy lead." You scoffed, letting go of one of his shoulders to pinch one of his cheeks. His smile elevated to a chuckle as he caught your hand in the one that was being used to support you; now, without any support, you felt yourself falling until your back hit the soft, white carpet that Dazai had begged you to decorate your sitting room with. But then you were being pulled back up and caged in by the same lanky arms that had let you fall.

"Thank you, y/n." Dazai muttered into your hair. You rose an eyebrow and used all of your strength to push away from him so you could see his face and try to guess his emotions. However, once you managed to free yourself, a thumb and forefinger closed around your chin and brought it forward until your lips were trapped by Dazai's before you could comment on his impromptu thanks.

Dazai was relieved when you surrendered yourself to the kiss, promising no further harassment from you since you were too pre-occupied with his affections. He'd decided that the explanation for his gratefulness was too sappy anyway. He had a reputation to maintain.

Chapter Text

hot tea, the smell of must on old books, frigid hands and cheeks made warm by contact, comfortable silence, cherry cough drops, natural light, a black throw on a white couch, tangled legs, a back pressed to a chest, stubborn kisses, hidden smiles

Some live just to love, find love, or be loved and no one had pegged Akutagawa to become that type of person. In fact, no one thought he would be the type of guy to get into a relationship, let alone like being in a relationship. Love was as dangerous as he was--maybe even moreso. Love made one blind to everything around them and inside them. Love was pointless, worthless, hopeless. 

Love's a risk...

But now, as you sat with your back facing him, the fingers of his left hand mindlessly twirling a strand of your hair around them, and a book in his right hand, he knew that love was absolutely necessary. Without love, he wouldn't be relaxing with you while the heavens cried until they couldn't anymore. Without love, he would mind that his tea was cold, and that his thighs were growing numb from how you'd been sitting on them for so long, and that he could barely read the text of his book because of the useless natural light filtering in from the windows. But none of that mattered. The only thing that mattered was the way that the silence in his air was so incredibly comfortable, and how the black, plush throw that you two were sharing had enough warmth for the two of you. 

Akutagawa cleared his throat.

"I want to see you." He stated. 

"I'm right here." You retorted, causing Akutagawa to roll his eyes. 

"You know what I meant." Akutagawa's clipped tone made your body move on its own, lifting you up off of his thighs and turned you around so that you were kneeling over him on the couch you were making dents in. He slid a hand against your cheek and you shivered at how cold it was, while he shivered at how cold your cheek was. But the simultaneous relief you both felt from the warmth that spread through both of your bodies would never give away that you had both needed the warmth of the other.

Akutagawa's eyes said something that he said very rarely, and your eyes reciprocated the unspoken feeling. Words weren't needed when two people were in love. And as you sank into the kiss that Akutagawa had decided to suddenly inflict upon you, words still weren't needed. Not when you were tasting the cherry cough drop Akutagawa had just sucked on moments before. You had wondered why it was so quiet.

You're at a loss just because it wasn't all that you thought it was ...

But love didn't account for that spark he felt bringing his soul back to life whenever his lips brushed against yours. Love didn't account for the longing he had to bear when he was away for weeks at a time and all he could think about was holding you. No, that was something else. If it wasn't love, then what could it be? Maybe love wasn't all it was credited to be.

Chapter Text

soft blankets, whispers of the future, string lights, bare feet on cold tile, hair the color of clouds, hot cocoa with extra marshmallows, sweatpants and knit sweaters, short naps with the tv on, laughter, shy kisses followed one after another

The glare from the television in the corner and the soft twinkling of the string lights that you had helped Atsushi hang around his bed provided ample light to take in the breathtaking sight of your boyfriend, in all of his bashful glory. 

His hair was almost the spitting image of the clouds outside, had it been styled differently, and his cheeks were the same color as the pink knit sweater he wore for these types of hangs specifically, since he knew you liked the way it smelled when you snuggled your face into his chest. And finally, his lemon-zested violet eyes were trying their best to meet your own, but he couldn't just overlook what you had said.

Clinging to not getting sentimental, said she wasn't going but she went still... 

It was true what you had said--you could defend it to your death because of how excruciatingly true it was. Atsushi wasn't perfect in your eyes--he was quite raw and unrefined--but you could spend the rest of your life chipping away at all the grime and dirt to get to beautiful, shining soul that you could detect traces of every day.

"Don't worry, Sushi, it means I love you. It doesn't mean anything bad." You explained, trying to suppress your laughter at his worried expression. He let out a huff of relief and threw his arms around you, causing you both to fall back onto his bed. 

"Oh, good. I thought you were breaking up with me. Who says that to someone anyway? Scared me half to death!" He said hurriedly, a little too relieved that you meant good by your words. He needed to step away and recuperate. He needed to calm down. "I'm gonna get us something to drink, okay? You find something good to watch." And then he was gone, leaving you confused and amused at his sudden sense of urgency.

Atsushi's bare feet slapped against the cold tile of his apartment's floor as he rushed to the kitchen to prepare some hot cocoa with extra marshmallows for the two of you to enjoy. Chocolate always seemed to help calm him down, and he'd do anything to regain the calm and collected mood he felt before you said those trying words to him.

Oh, the boy's a slag, the best you ever had...

A small smile found its way onto Atsushi's face as he laid eyes on your form, fast asleep and given up on reaching for the remote. He set the mugs down on the television stand and gently crawled into bed beside you, pulling the blanket at the foot of his bed over your shoulders and his own. The two of you were now laying face to face, and Atsushi dared to place a light kiss on your nose, fearing he'd wake you up. But once he saw that you remained asleep, he let himself brush his lips against yours. Atsushi wished it would never stop raining, and the two of you could remain like that forever.