Chapter Text
As much as Gai wanted to stay by Neji’s side, he still had a duty to his village. Besides, the exhaustion had finally caught up to the boy, so he was sleeping through most of visiting hours anyway. It worked in Gai’s favor because it meant he didn’t have to request any leave from service, which also meant that he could continue getting paid, which is always a good thing. Teaching was undoubtedly his calling, and he loved what he did, but it didn’t exactly pay well. Afterall, being a sensei to a team of genin meant he went on a lot of C and D-ranked missions. Thank God the kids were improving enough to start accepting B-ranks and even A-ranks, in Neji’s case. Though, he assumed Neji wouldn’t be going on any missions anytime soon. Regardless, Gai always jumped at the opportunity when offered an S-rank, like the one he just returned from.
The initial report estimated the whole mission to take a week, but he finished it in just 3 days, tying his personal record. He stood across from the Hokage, relaying the details from his journey and awaiting her next question.
“Sounds like things went off without a hitch.”
“Yes it did, Lady Hokage. The interrogation went better than expected. As soon as he realized I had him cornered, he crumbled.”
“Well excellent job. The Empress is incredibly grateful and I think you’ve earned us a very powerful ally in the north,” Tsunade replied. She took one last glance at the report and put it back into the envelope. “How’s Neji doing? I’ve read his medical report,” she shook her head, “He’s very lucky to be alive, Gai.”
He swallowed, “I know.” God knows how the kid survived out in the forest before he arrived. “I thought he was doing better, but he tore stitches and nearly bled out the other day.”
“So I’ve heard. Dr. Hiroki has decided to start cutting back his pain medication. Oxycodone is highly addictive so we can’t risk keeping him on high dosages for much longer. He’ll be in a bit more pain, but hopefully that means he’ll be more careful with his stitches.”
Gai clenched his jaw. Tsunade was giving him a sympathetic smile. He had a feeling ‘a bit more pain’ was going to be much worse than she was letting on.
“It also means he’ll hopefully be more cognizant. Do you think he’s well enough to handle a mission debrief? I need this case closed as soon as possible.
He clenched his jaw again. He knew this would come eventually, but Neji still couldn’t talk about the mission without having an anxiety attack. “I think so…although he’s dealing with some serious PTSD. I can’t promise that he’ll be able to debrief in the details that you’re used to.”
“I understand. I’ll come by later today, assuming he’s awake, of course,” Tsunade replied, “Thank you again, Gai. You’re dismissed.”
He nodded and took his leave.
oOoOoOo
Neji was in the middle of a breathing treatment when Gai stopped by that afternoon. He was holding a nebulizer mask to his face and doing his best to breathe deeply from it.
Nurse Maiko was standing next to the boy, closely monitoring him when she heard the door open, “Well isn’t this a nice surprise! We weren’t expecting to see you for a few more days.”
“It was an easier mission than I thought. How are things here?” He asked, taking his self-proclaimed seat at the head of the hospital bed.
“I think we’re doing alright, wouldn’t you say so?” She replied, directing her question at Neji who shook his head, ‘no.’ “Oh hush, he’s just moody. Dr. Hiroki cut back his pain medication yesterday, and it hasn’t been pleasant.” Nurse Maiko gave Neji a soft, reassuring side hug, “He’s still struggling with getting a full night’s sleep but his back has healed enough that it doesn’t hurt to lay down flat anymore. Which is a good thing,” She added, giving her patient a pointed look.
“I heard about the pain medication from Lady Tsunade. I’m sorry Neji, it’s never a fun experience,” Gai replied.
Neji shook his head in agreement. God, the kid still looked totally drained.
“Alrighty, that’s fifteen minutes. Good job!” Maiko turned off the machine and took the nebulizer from Neji, replacing it with the nasal cannula, “I’ll be back in about an hour with a snack and a protein shake!” She called out as she exited the room.
Neji collapsed back into the pillows, exhausted from the breathing exercise.
“Did your teammates come by while I was gone?”
The kid nodded, “They all did,” he coughed out, “ a lot. ”
“They’re good friends then.”
“Hn.”
Damn, he missed high Neji already. He could tell just from his demeanor that he was in a bad mood. “I guess you didn’t get a lot of quiet time then. I can leave if you want to rest.”
He shook his head, “I just woke up.”
At least the kid’s voice wasn’t so gravely today.
“How many hours did you make it through?”
“Four,” he coughed.
The boy’s face pinch in pain. His waxy complexion made the circles under his eyes look even more prominent against his sallow skin. His cheeks had hollowed a bit, amplifying the gaunt appearance. No wonder the nurses were so worried about his weight. Couple that with pneumonia that’s taking its sweet time leaving his body, a menacing case of PTSD, and a slow recovery from an arduous surgery, it was no wonder the kid was so miserable.
“Is there anything I can do to help?” He hated seeing his student like this.
Neji shook his head no, too tired to even open his eyes. Gai nodded quietly, deciding to give the kid a moment of silence, and distracted himself with anything he could lay his eyes on. He noted the book on the bedside table. It didn’t look like he’d made any progress since the last time he saw him, which was surprising. Neji was undoubtedly his most studious pupil. He loved reading. He was even known to bring two books on long missions.
“Doesn’t seem you made any headway in your book. If you don’t get going, I’ll finish mine before you finish yours,” Gai joked.
“I can’t read it,” he said, looking absolutely defeated, “It hurts my head and I can’t focus. I had to re-read the first three pages five times.”
Well no wonder he was so down. He couldn’t even enjoy his favorite pastime. He watched the boy turn onto his right side and slowly tuck himself into a ball, cocooned in the pile of blankets. A strangled sigh escaped his lips as he scrunched his eyes in pain.
Gai’s stomach squirmed with anxiety. Neji wasn’t one to outwardly show emotion, so when he did it was always attention grabbing, and right now he might as well be flashing a sign that said “I’m depressed.” He couldn’t blame the kid. He was in a level of intensive care that most of his teammates would never experience. Lee was in bad shape after his battle, sure, but he didn’t need to be resuscitated– twice .
The boy shivered, a low, very quiet moan roared from his mouth. He dug his head deeper into the pillows as he clutched the bicep of his injured arm, unintentionally hugging himself. Gai was at a loss for words. He’d seen Neji like this only once before.
His students had been a team for nearly three months when Neji missed his first training session. The other two had shown up late from time to time, but Neji was reliably punctual, so it sparked a bit of concern. But when lunch rolled by and he still wasn’t there, Gai decided that he would stop by the Hyuga compound that evening to check in on him and he was so glad he did. A branch member led him to Neji’s room and filled him in on what happened. Apparently he’d ticked off a clan elder at breakfast and had his curse mark activated. He would find out later that that elder was actually Neji’s grandfather.
When he finally opened the door, the boy was lying in bed, curled in on himself and shivering. The room was shrouded in darkness but there was enough light to guide him to the bed and place a reassuring hand on the boy’s shoulder. Gai would never forget the look of pure misery on Neji’s face. He wanted to throw up, and based on the stench, he had a feeling Neji already beat him to it. He did his best to comfort the boy but there really isn’t much that can be done other than to wait it out. No medication helped. Noise and light were debilitating. Not even sleep guaranteed an escape from the torture. He felt the same way now as he did then: Helpless. Which was ironic, because that was exactly how Neji appeared in both situations as well. He would’ve thought he learned something from Lee’s stay in the hospital, but Gai was catatonic with uncertainty. The first time he barely knew anything about the kid, so navigating illness together was awkward. But he knew the kid pretty well now. Maybe even better than his actual guardian. Surely he could think of something that might help him feel better. He scanned the room again and found himself staring down the book again.
“What if I read your book out loud? You can even keep your eyes closed,” Gai suggested in a hushed voice.
Neji cracked open an eye, considering the offer. His gaze shifted up to meet Gai’s and he gave a minute nod.
“Okay, close your eyes and I’ll turn off the lights. If you fall asleep, I’ll mark your place.”
Neji nodded, eyes already shut again. Gai pulled the extra blanket over the boy’s shoulders before walking over to switch off the fluorescent lights. He then turned on the bedside lamp so he could read under its soft glow. He decided to start from the beginning, figuring that his student didn’t retain any of the information from the multiple times he attempted the first few pages. The book was an average size, maybe 300, 400 pages, but he’d seen the kid lug around novels that were easily twice as big.
Gai wasn’t sure what type of literature he thought Neji would be into, but science fiction wouldn’t have been his first guess. The story was set far in the future. There seemed to be some sort of alien invasion prompting the world to send kids to military school so they could help in the war. It was actually quite interesting, but definitely written for a young teenager. He blazed through two whole chapters before realizing Neji was snoring softly. Gai marked the page, using all his restraint not to continue reading. His own book wasn’t nearly as spellbinding.
He was admittedly shocked. He expected Neji to be into more reserved material like…historical nonfiction or memoirs from old authors. Something that screamed maturity. But it was good to know the kid still had some sense of acting his age.
About an hour ticked by when Nurse Maiko returned with a tray carrying a strawberry protein shake, a vanilla pudding cup, a plain slice of toast cut into small triangles, and some applesauce. She placed the tray on the bed table and turned to Gai, “I’m so sorry, but I have to wake him.”
“What? Why!?” He whispered.
“He’s losing too much weight, we can’t have him skipping any meals,” she replied as she walked back to the door to turn on the lights.
Gai squinted, “But he just fell asleep. He’s exhausted. Please.”
“I know, I know. I want him to rest too, but getting his weight up is more important. I really am sorry,” Maiko said, giving him a sympathetic smile. She turned back to her patient, “Neji, honey it’s time to wake up.” She started stroking his hair, coaxing him to rouse. “Come on, hun, wakey-wakey.”
Neji stirred slightly, cracking his eyes open and squinting up at her. He let out a childish whine.
“I brought you something to eat.” Maiko helped him sit up and handed over the plastic spoon, “Do you think we could get through most of it again?”
Neji gave her a tired nod, not fully comprehending what he was agreeing to. Gai watched him mechanically dip the spoon in the applesauce and take a small bite. He blinked slowly, practically asleep in his sitting position.
Nurse Maiko gave him an encouraging pat on the shoulder and let herself out. Neji took a lethargic bite of the toast, choking back the food. Gai glanced at the clock, it was nearly four.
“A bit late for lunch, isn’t it?”
“They’re making me eat four times a day,” he hacked.
God, his cough seemed to be getting worse. He glanced at the monitor, 102.9°. Not good. Neji coughed harder. Gai’s eyes snapped back to him. The toast must’ve been exceptionally dry. He handed over the water glass, holding it steady while the boy drank from the straw.
“You should try putting applesauce on the toast. Might soften the bread a bit.”
Neji gave him a questioning look. Looking at the bread in his hand and the cup of applesauce on the tray. He was clearly unimpressed.
Oh that’s right. How could Gai forget? “Bland” seemed to be Neji’s favorite seasoning.
“What? Have a little imagination. There’s no rules when it comes to food.”
“Except not to eat raw chicken. Or spoiled milk. Or–” he coughed, cutting his sentence short.
“You know what I mean. Come on, give it a try,” Gai coaxed.
He held a spoonful of applesauce up to him. Neji eyed the utensil warily, but held out the toast. He accepted the dollop and took a bite. His eyes widened with amazement, quickly finishing the bite. He held out the toast again expectantly. Gai smiled and placed another scoop on the toast. The boy finished the toast and the applesauce in record time.
“You know what I bet would make it even better? Cinnamon.”
Neji’s eyes widened again, head nodding at the idea.
“When one of the nurses comes back, we can ask if they have any.”
The boy nodded in agreement and dipped the spoon into the pudding.
“Vanilla, aye? I’m more of a chocolate guy myself.”
The boy shook his head, using his energy to take another spoonful rather than respond. Gai was actually impressed by how much of an appetite he had. He sat patiently while his student finished up two-thirds of the pudding cup before setting the utensil on the table. Neji took a sip of the shake then reclined back into the pillows.
“All done?”
He nodded.
Anxiety squirmed down Gai’s throat. Suddenly, one slice of toast, a side of applesauce, and an unfinished pudding cup didn’t seem that impressive. Neji had consumed, what, maybe 300 calories? If he was being generous. No wonder they were making him eat so often.
He studied the boy. God, what Gai wouldn’t do to just fast-forwarded through this hospital stay. He’d never seen Neji so… tired . But more than just struggling to sleep. Tired like he’d been fighting an enemy for too long. Tired like he’d lost the youthful spark in him. Everything about him reflected it. His skin was waxy and pale. His hair lacked its usual shine. And his fiery spirit had been extinguished.
“Want to hear about my mission? It was short, but boy, there was barely a moment to breathe during the three days I was gone,” Gai asked, trying to fill the silence.
Neji coughed, “Can I close my eyes?”
This poor kid.
“Of course, I can even turn the lights out if you’d like,” Gai replied, already standing up.
Neji nodded, already snuggling deeper into the pillows by the time Gai returned to his seat. He turned back onto his side to face Gai, wincing with the movement, then blinking at him expectantly with half-lidded eyes.
“I was sent to a small, but very wealthy town near the Hidden Mist to intercept a heist,” Gai paused to gauge Neji’s participation level for this conversation. The boy popped his eyes open when the story stopped. “The Empress’ protection team caught wind of an infamous gang of criminals targeting her Spring Jubilee. Apparently the gala was going to have diamond encrusted art pieces on display from a world-renowned artist, so it was bound to peak the interest of some robber, right?”
Neji nodded, closing his eyes again. Gai continued the story, embellishing only enough to make it sound really really cool. He stopped the story a few times, thinking his student finally fell back asleep, but apparently he made it too compelling because the boy would force his eyes open and mumble out a question.
Gai loved it. He didn’t spend a lot of time with Neji. Most of it was due to the boy’s avid defiance in doing anything with the team outside of practice. And truthfully, besides from Taijutsu, there wasn’t much for Gai to teach him, and even their styles of tai were completely different. Gai and Lee were all about power. Neji was all about precision. Tenten was a bit of a mix between the two.
He honestly didn’t think Neji thought too highly of him, so it was surprising to see just how invested he was in the story. The kid was literally fighting off sleep. He held back yawns and repeatedly insisted he was still awake despite being unable to open his eyes.
That was until they heard a knock at the door.
“Come in!” Gai called, expecting a nurse.
The door opened, revealing their Hokage and her assistant.
“Lady Tsunade, it’s a pleasure to see you,” he said, rising to bow.
“Good seeing you too, Gai. You can relax. I’m just stopping by to see if I could ask Neji a few questions,” she said, her voice matching the calm ambience of the room.
The boy was now very awake, staring wide-eyed at their Hokage, fear reflecting in his irises. He visibly swallowed and slowly pulled himself up into a more dignified position, “Y-yes, of course, Lady Hokage,” a cough escaping his lips.
Tsunade opened the door wide and let herself in, Shizune following behind her. “I have to say Neji, we were just thinking we were getting bored until you and the rest of your team showed up,” she joked.
Neji smiled politely while Shizune examined his surgical stitches.
“How are you feeling?”
Neji’s gaze dropped to his lap, shoulders visibly drooping.
Gai winced. “He’s been having trouble sleeping. And I think cutting down on the pain medicine is starting to show its effects. It’s been…hard.”
Neji flinched when Shizune undid the bandages on his shoulder. “I know it’s not fun. They kept you on the higher dosage for as long as they could. If the pain is truly unmanageable, we can try some Tylenol.”
Gai watched Shizune tie the bandages back in place, then he turned back to study Tsunade. He knew why she was here, and by the look on Neji’s face, he knew it too.
“Neji, I know you’re still not feeling well, but if you’re up to it, I would really like to debrief the mission with you. You’re the only account we’re missing and I need this filed as soon as possible so we can register Sasuke as ‘Defected.’ But more importantly, it will give us a clearer picture of your injuries. Normally we’d discuss the entire mission, but given your health, and the other four boys’ testimonies, I don’t think it’s necessary.”
Gai watched as Neji clenched his jaw and gave the Hokage an apprehensive nod. Tsunade let out a breath. He could tell she didn’t want to do this either.
“The latest account I have before your battle is from Shikamaru. Some of the information has been redacted to ensure your testimonies match.” Tsunade read from the report in her hand, “Neji stayed back to fight the Sound-nin while we took off in the direction of Sasuke. The Sound-nin targeted us but Neji intercepted. We continued our chase for about thirty minutes before coming face-to-face with the Sound team again.
“I’m just going to ask you a few questions to make sure your account matches the team’s. Then I’ll ask you specific questions about your battle, alright?”
Tsunade waited for Neji to give a timid nod then nodded herself.
“Right. What was the name of your opponent?”
“Kidomaru,” Neji said, voice barely breaking a whisper.
Tsunade nodded, “Can you describe his fighting style?”
Neji twisted the sheets in his hand, refusing to make eye contact with anyone, “He was like a spider. He even had eight limbs.”
“Can you be more specific?”
Gai could feel the tension in the room. He would’ve left if he didn’t think Neji would need him here.
“He…he made things–like webs, and kunai, a-and…a…arrows–from his body, using chakra. And he’d set traps like a spider. Early in the fight, before everyone left, he had me…cocooned in his chakra webbing.”
“Who suggested that you stay behind to fight him?” Tsunade asked cautiously.
You could’ve heard a pin drop if it weren’t for the beeping of the heart monitor. Was she really suggesting that the team stranded him?
“I did. I was the only one who could cut through his webbing,” Neji said, unphased by the question.
Tsunade let out a small sigh of relief, “Was there anything unique about Kidomaru?”
“He had this mark…it traveled across his body, leaving a pattern behind. At some point he completely changed. He was practically unrecognizable. Not even his chakra network looked familiar.”
“The others reported similar markings on their opponents as well. What happened once everyone left?”
Neji paused for a long moment, hands tangled in the sheets.
“Neji?” Tsunade asked carefully.
“We went head to head for a bit. And then he fled into the trees.”
His heart rate sped up ever so slightly. Gai would’ve missed it if he hadn’t clocked Shizune’s eyes jumping between his student and the monitor. He listened intently as Neji went further into detail, describing how the first kunai made it through his blind spot, slicing his shoulder, and how six more became embedded in his back. Gai winced. The stab wounds sounded bad, but it was the giant spider that crushed him that really made him squirm. He hated spiders. Getting crushed by one sounded like his worst nightmare.
Neji stopped suddenly, breathing heavily. Shizune looked up from her notes.
“We’re almost done. Do you think you can tell us what happened next?” Tsunade asked, breaking the silence after giving him a moment.
Neji’s eye flickered from left to right, kneading the blanket in his hands, “He…he shot an arrow. He was outside my field of vision so I didn’t see it coming.” He took another minute, clenching his jaw repeatedly, “I-I was able to throw it off a little, but it…it, um, it h-hit me in the ch-chest. And it burned. I thought I was on fire. And then i-it s-started b…bleeding…And it hurt so fucking bad, I think I passed out for a second.”
The silence was deafening. The heart monitor’s rapid beat pierced the room.
“I think he moved, so he could aim from a different angle…And he, um, he…shot again. I missed it, just barely,” Neji instinctively reached for the mostly-healed cut on his face.
“Why don’t we take a break?” Tsunade placed a reassuring hand on his uninjured shoulder.
But Neji had tuned her out, his mind stuck in the battle. He chewed his lip, fear bubbling in his eyes. His heart was racing. Breathing sporadically, he wheezed out, “I-I knew h-he w-was g-gonna do it again. A-and he w-was s-so much stronger than me. I-I couldn’t…I…couldn’t. A-and the, the arrow–,” He gasped desperately, hyperventilating as he clutched at his chest.
Machines whirled and alarms screamed.
“Neji, I need you to breathe, okay? Deep breaths, like this,” Tsunade demonstrated. She reached for the oxygen mask to replace the nasal cannula.
Gai jumped to his feet, panic erupting through him. He watched Neji’s heart rate shoot into the 200s and his body start to tremble.
Tsunade continued to demonstrate exaggerated breaths as his student did his best to mimic her.
“What’s happening!?” anxiety cracking in Gai’s voice.
“It’s just a panic attack,” Shizune said calmly, stepping up next to Tsunade.
Just a panic attack.
“You’re okay, Neji. Just breathe.”
“Temperature’s 103.6.”
“Focus on me, block everything else out.”
The kid fought valiantly but the anxiety overtook him. His eyes rolled into the back of his head as his body convulsed. Shizune punched the call button and Nurse Aimi came in moments later.
“I need lorazepam stat, he’s seizing,” Tsunade said, rolling the boy on to his side.
“Yes Lady Hokage.”
Gai was frozen to his spot. Fear ripped away his ability to speak. He watched as the boy’s meager lunch came back up and all over the sheets.
“Here,” Aimi said, returning with a syringe and handing it to Tsunade.
The Hokage quickly administered it through the IV port. It took another minute, but the seizure finally stopped and the medical equipment quieted down.
The boy soon started to stir.
“You’re okay. Can you open your eyes for me?” Tsunade whispered.
Neji let out a quiet whine, lacking the energy to follow her orders.
“Come on hun, you can sleep once you answer some questions for me.”
The boy whined again and clumsily grabbed at his head.
“Does your head hurt?”
He winced and turned away from her voice, nuzzling his face into the pillow.
“Can you squeeze my hands?” Shizune placed a hand in each of Neji’s and waited for him to follow her directions, “Good!” She said in a hushed tone.
“Can you tell me your name?” Tsunade asked, hovering a green, chakra-laced hand over his forehead.
It took some coaxing from all three women but he finally stuttered out his name and followed along through several other neurological tests.
“Do you know where you are?”
He finally cracked open his eyes and looked around the room, “...h-hospital?”
“Good!”
“What…happened?” he asked, voice muffled by the mask.
Tsunade pulled his chin so he was looking up at her, and studied his eyes, one hand still glowing over his forehead, “You had a seizure.”
“Mmm…Don’t feel good.”
“I’m sorry, do you think you’re going to be sick?”
Now that she mentioned it, he did look a bit pale. Neji nodded, nausea rising in his throat. A shaky hand came up to his mouth, feebly holding back a gag.
“Here,” Shizune helped him sit up and was rewarded with a childish whimper, “I’m sorry, I know. Open your eyes. There’s a bowl in front of you if you need to be sic–,”
Neji vomited, almost missing the bowl altogether, but thankfully Shizune’s reflexes were faster than his.
“Here. Take a sip and rinse out your mouth.”
“Mmm head hurts.”
“I know, are you tired?”
Neji nodded, eyes already closed.
“That’s alright. Nurse Aimi is going to help change your sheets and then you can get some sleep, okay?”
The boy nodded again, sighing with relief at Tsunade’s healing touch.
“Gai, can I speak with you outside?” The Hokage asked.
“O-of course,” he responded, voice cracking from stress.
He followed the two medics out of the room while Aimi cooed and whispered sweet nothings to his student.
“I want to order an EEG. It’s concerning that he’s had another seizure.”
“Yes, of course,” Gai agreed.
“In order to do so though, we’ll need to intentionally trigger another seizure.”
“Isn’t that dangerous?”
“We’ll be monitoring him very closely. But it’s the best way to measure brain waves during episodes. We need to know if the seizures are epileptic or non-epileptic. His head trauma might be more significant than we initially thought.”
Gai bit his tongue. Epilepsy and ninja work didn’t mix well, and Neji had too much potential to retire as a genin. “Are you going to do it now?”
“Well it’s not that simple. We’re intentionally putting him in harm’s way, so we’ll need his uncle to agree to the treatment first. And seizures aren’t fun. He needs some time to recover from this one. But, hopefully, we can start monitoring in the next day or so.”
The door creaked open, interrupting their conversation. Nurse Aimi emerged, closing it quietly behind her. “He’s fast asleep. I decided to keep the oxygen mask on, his sats were a bit low.”
“Thank you,” Tsunade said with a smile.
“Gai, do you plan on going back in? I think he’d like someone to stay with him,” Aimi continued, giving him a sad, guilt-tripping look.
“I can stay for about another hour, but then I need to get to training with my other students.”
“I think he’d appreciate every minute of it, even if he–hopefully–stays asleep,” she replied with a wink then exited down the hall and back to her station.
“You’re a good teacher, Gai,” Lady Tsunade said as she followed Nurse Aimi, “Mission, hospital visit, and team training, all in one day.”
Gai bowed, despite the Hokage facing the other way, and thanked her. He slowly turned the doorknob and let himself into the mostly-dark room. True to her word, Neji was passed out, puffing shallow breaths into the mask. An icepack dripped from his forehead. They really needed to shake this pneumonia.
He took his seat and sat quietly, reading his own book while his student slept.