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Sometimes there are strange coincidences in life. They appear out of nowhere, catching us off guard. These coincidences at first glance can seem like trouble and only trouble, but after a while it's easy to see that there really are no coincidences at all. Everything that happens is for a reason.
‘Everything happens for a reason’ was a motto that Jeon Jungkook tried to live by. Because if he didn't, he wasn't sure he'd be able to live at all. He had to believe that when he woke up feeling like there was no point in moving, it was for a reason. When he watched people leave his life, it was for a reason. Yet, he wasn't really sure what that reason was.
He was undeniably lonely, too, but he never let himself get too close to other people. The only people he was close to were other people like him. Vampires. But they weren't his friends so much as they were informants. They fed him information and helped him keep up with some old friends as well as let him know where he could get good blood. It wasn't like they hung out or went to get coffee together.
Jungkook didn't know what day it was when he woke up one morning, alone, as usual, in the abandoned building he was holed up in. He could have any nice apartment he wanted, but living in the slums was his way of punishing himself. He'd never stopped punishing himself, not since he watched Kim Taehyung's body being lowered into a grave. It was the worst thing he'd ever experience. His heart still lurched at the memory. It was somehow even worse than watching him die.
"Rise and shine," a voice said to his right. He turned to see another vampire there, holding Jungkook's backpack.
"What do you want?" he asked.
"You told me to give you word if anything happened with any of your old acquaintances," the other vampire said, kneeling down so he could be level with Jungkook. "In return, you'll tell me where you get your blood supply."
The vampire has scraggly dark hair and was dressed in clothes that were far too big for him. Sure, many vampires became beautiful in death, but some didn’t. Some looked like walking corpses. Some looked like the monsters that they were.
"Okay, well tell me what it is then. Is it something about Jin? Or is it Yoongi?" Jungkook asked, grabbing his backpack back from the other. He had heard things about Jin, but Yoongi was pretty much a ghost since Hoseok had passed away. Before then, Jungkook had been able to keep track of them better. They'd had a good life together, and Yoongi had stayed by Hoseok's side even as he had grown old. Jungkook remembered watching them from afar once, Hoseok was beginning to age and he had lines around his eyes when he smiled, and he was always smiling. The two of them were out at a park and Yoongi held Hoseok's hand, despite the strange looks they got from onlookers because of the obvious age difference. The way they looked at each other had been so...pure.
"Neither," the other vampire said, interrupting Jungkook's reverie.
"Everyone else is dead," Jungkook snapped, and it was true. Kim Namjoon had stuck around the longest. Jungkook had attended his funeral. It was filled with unfamiliar faces and he had felt completely out of place.
"This is about Kim Taehyung," the vampire said.
"What? That's not funny," Jungkook stood up and headed for the door, feeling his head spinning from only hearing Taehyung’s name.
"One of my guys saw him, he's going to school nearby. Majors in law, I think. I have photos."
Jungkook paused and turned around. He didn't need to say he wanted to see the photos. His informant could see as much on his face. So, he pulled a roll of shiny photos from his back pocket and held them out to Jungkook, who snatched them quickly.
His hands shook as he unrolled them. And sure enough, there was Tae. The pictures weren't super clear and other kids were walking around him, but he would know that face anywhere. It was Taehyung, without a doubt. His hair was dark and his skin was glowing and tan and he looked damn good.
"Taehyung is dead," Jungkook says firmly and rolls the pictures back up. "I watched him die. I held his dead body. This means nothing to me. I won't tell you anything about my blood supply."
Jungkook turned on his heels and walked out into the sunlight. However, he had made sure to take note of the name of school that had been visible in the photos. As he walked down the street, he knew exactly where he was headed.
~~~
"We have been walking this campus for hours. I'm tired and hungry and very annoyed with you right now."
"You adore me."
"Not when you drag me along and then start going off about how handsome and great you are," Nari muttered and came to a stop before sitting down on the edge of the sidewalk.
Jin sighed and joined her. She was right, they'd been walking around for eons it seemed. Plenty of kids passed them by but none of them were the one they were looking for. Maybe it was all a mistake anyway.
"Want to grab lunch?" Jin asked Nari.
"Depends. What kind of lunch?"
"Either one," Jin replied.
"I'm actually hungry, soo..."
"Okay," Jin looked around as a new wave of students began to fill the sidewalks and streets as they made their way to class. "Who looks good?"
"I wish we knew what blood type people were. I'm craving type AB positive."
"I'm craving lamb skewers," Jin mumbled. He stood up to get a better view of the crowd. Nari stayed seated, but looked around too. She mostly had a view of shoes and pant legs.
She smiled when she spotted a pair of timberlands in the crowd. "Hey, remember Jungkook and his white T-shirt and timberland obsession?" Nari said.
Jin looked down at her. "I told you about that, you wouldn't have known if I hadn't," he said. "Remember when you had a crush on him?"
Nari slapped Jin's leg. "I did not!"
"You totally thought he was more handsome than me!" Jin argued.
"Untrue."
"Well, you think I’m more handsome now right?" Jin smirked slightly as Nari looked up at him.
"Maybe, I don't know," she shrugged nonchalantly and Jin huffed. He leaned down and placed a kiss on top of her head, which made her meet his eyes again and he was able to kiss her properly. She rested her hands on his shoulders and both of them momentarily forgot they were in a public.
Until of course, a familiar voice interrupted them. "You guys are disgusting."
"Oh my god!" Nari jumped up and threw her arms around Jungkook. He returned the hug. He hadn't seen Nari in some time, Jin either, but both of them looked good. He remembered how thin and fragile Nari had been wen he'd first met her. Now though, her bones didn't protrude from her skin, and her face was flushed with color. It seemed death had done her well, ironically. And Jin seemed like he'd gotten taller (even though he hadn't) and his shoulders might have gotten wider if that were even possible.
Nari pulled back and took Jungkook in. "Damn," she said. "I change my mind Jin, I do have a crush on him."
Jungkook blushed and Jin just rolled his eyes. "I don't think you'll have much luck," Jin said.
"What're you guys doing here?" Jungkook asked, giving Jin a look. The two of them didn't hug or even properly greet at all. There was tension between them, there had been since everything went down, even if it had been years and years and years (and years) ago.
Nari and Jin exchanged a pointed look. "We heard...some things," Jin said vaguely.
"That Taehyung is here, you mean?" Jungkook asked bluntly. "Because that's what I heard. But it’s obviously not him so, you guys can go."
"If it's obviously not him then why are you here?" Jin snapped.
Jungkook glared at Jin. He just wanted to see this guy. The one who looked like Tae. That was all. He wasn't going to talk to him or get close. It wasn't Tae, he knew that, it was just someone who looked exactly like him. He'd heard about that being a thing, unrelated people looking exactly alike. Doppelgängers.
"Maybe we should take this somewhere else," Nari suggested.
Jin turned around to see a couple of kids watching them. Jungkook followed his gaze. The kids were pointing and whispering to each other.
It was uncommon for them to get recognized anymore. For the most part, BTS was forgotten and they were free to go out in public without fear of recognition. And if someone did mention that they looked like someone from BTS, they would just play it off as coincidence because what else could they say? "Oh yes, that's me, I'm actually an immortal vampire!"
However, sometimes people would still point at Jungkook or Jin (and even Yoongi, wherever he was) when they walked down the street. Jin would laugh and say to Nari, "It's just because I'm so handsome." And Jungkook knew he was good looking too, but he also knew that the internet existed and anyone, even someone young who hadn't known BTS when they were originally popular, could be into BTS now. Jungkook also knew that there were plenty of conspiracy theories floating around out there on the internet. So they could never be too careful.
"Yeah," Jungkook agreed with Nari. "Or I could just go and you guys can just go. Nice to see you, Nari," he waved and then was swallowed up by the crowd.
"Why do you have to be like that?" Nari asked Jin.
"Me?" he exclaimed. "He's the one being a brat!"
Nari sighed and took Jin's arm. "Are we staying?"
"Yeah," Jin glared into the crowd even though Jungkook was gone. "I want to find that kid before Jungkook does."
~~~
The cafeteria was a wreck. Jungkook swallowed dryly as he scanned the options to eat, but none of it looked good. Everyone around him was engrossed in their own things, their own friends and conversations. So, he lagged behind the lunch line until most of the students were gone. It was a self-serve sort of thing, but there were some people behind the counter making sure things were kept neat. Jungkook grabbed a cup from the soda station and waved one of the women over.
"Can I help you with something?" she asked.
Jungkook leaned forward so he was looking into her eyes. "Cut your wrist and fill this with your blood, then go to a nurse and say you had a kitchen accident," he said. It didn't take long for her to hand the cup over and he quickly scurried away to find a table. He grabbed one with a good vantage point of the room and sat down. Students poured in and out and after almost an hour the cafeteria was starting to clear out and Jungkook was on the verge of giving up, but then, the room got darker and all the light was focused around one person walking in. The boy’s face was lit up as he laughed at something one of his friends had said. He was wearing a pair of red sweat pants and a black T-shirt and his backpack was neon green and highlighter yellow.
"I can't believe I actually passed that test! I bullshitted the essay portion so hard!" his voice crossed the room effortlessly, deep and soulful. "I mean, I bet our professor didn't even read it! I could have written about how much I love cheese and he would have passed me."
"That's because you're a teacher’s pet, asshole," his friend replied.
Jungkook drained the last of the blood in his soda cup and was about to stand up (to do what, he wasn't sure) when suddenly an arm was around his shoulders and he was slammed back into his chair.
"Close your mouth, you'll catch flies," Jin said to Jungkook.
"Uhg." Jungkook groaned.
"Nari and I found him forever ago, we followed him here. Your sleuthing skills could use some work. I have a lot of jokes about detectives, wanna hear one? Or actually, wanna hear a joke about paper?"
"No, Jin, I don't," Jungkook muttered.
"Fine, its tearable anyway."
There was a time when that would have made Jungkook laugh, but he wasn't in the mood currently. "My sleuthing skills are top notch, for the record. I spy on you all the time. Or I have people spy on you for me. I know shit about you that you don't even know about yourself."
Jin made a face full of mock surprise. "As if I don't notice your creepy friends watching me, I'm not stupid."
Jungkook pushed Jin's arm off him and stood up. "Please leave me alone, hyung. Please."
Jungkook started to walk away from Jin and back towards the line for food where Tae's look-alike was filling a tray with his friends. Jungkook got a tray too and started to put some stuff on it without really paying attention. He could feel Jin's eyes on his back. Without paying attention to what he was getting, he started to fill his tray. Eventually, he reached the end of the food line and Tae's look-alike and his friends were paying and showing the woman their meal cards.
"Next," she said. She looked him dead in the eye. "Meal card?"
"I don't have one, but-" Jungkook was about to tell her that didn't matter, to let him go, but she looked away.
"Don't waste my time, kid," she said in annoyance.
"I just-"
"Hey, he's with me, you can put it on my account." Jungkook turned to look at Tae's look-alike in surprise.
"Whatever, just get out of here," the woman said an Jungkook muttered a thank you to her.
"I haven't seen you around before," Tae's look-alike said.
"Yeah, um, I'm visiting a friend," Jungkook lied.
"Where are they?"
Jungkook looked back into the cafeteria for Jin, but of course, he was gone. "I don't know."
"You can sit with us, if you want. I'm Dae-sung."
"I'm uh, Jungkook," he said awkwardly as he followed the boy to the table with his friends. They didn't seem to mind him sitting with them, they just smiled and went on with their conversation.
"So where are you from, Jungkook?" Dae-sung, Tae 2.0, asked.
"Busan."
"Oh, cool, I'm from Daegu."
"Shit, are you serious?" Jungkook asked loudly without thinking.
Dae-sung laughed. "Yeah, why?"
Jungkook cleared his throat. "Nothing just...I had a couple of friends from there."
Dae-sung smiled, and it was Tae's smile and Jungkook could almost pretend that the other kids at the table were Hoseok, Jimin, Namjoon, Yoongi, and even Jin. He could almost transport himself back to before they'd debuted and they were all getting to know each other again. He could almost feel happy again, with that smile pointed his way.
Only the last time he'd seen the real Tae's smile, it had been seconds before his death. Seconds before blood and tears and loneliness.
But this new version, it was almost as good.
"What, um, do you study?"
Dae-sung groaned and put some rice into his mouth, chewing slowly. "Law. Literally the most boring thing in existence. But my professor loves me."
"I can't imagine why, half the time you sit in the back and sleep!" one of his friends butts in.
"Are you in school?" Dae-sung asked Jungkook.
"Not really," he admitted.
One of the friends asked Dae-sung something and he turned away from Jungkook and started up a new conversation with his friends. Jungkook was suddenly on the outside again. He watched them all interact, so effortlessly, so normal. They had their whole lives ahead of them. One of the friends was tall with scraggly hair and if Jungkook squinted he could pass for Namjoon. Another one of them, even taller, with long legs and dark hair that was cut perfectly and big brown eyes that sparkles with humor, could be Jin. There was one with blonde hair, which reminded Jungkook of Hoseok when he was blonde. Jungkook sucked in a breath. He could see his friends in anyone if he tried hard enough. But Tae really was there, next to him.
But he wasn't anyone to this version of Tae. And he never could be. He couldn’t bring Dae-sung into his world. He couldn't do it and risk losing Tae all over again.
So he pushed his chair back and stood up without saying anything and started walking out of the cafeteria. His eyes were blurry and his head was spinning. It was all too much. He tried to breathe normally, but he could feel his heart rate increasing.
"Don't. Don't have a panic attack," he muttered to himself while he dug his nails into his palms, trying to focus on the pain and let it bring him back to the present.
When someone touched his shoulder he almost turned around and punched them, but luckily he didn't, because it was Dae-sung. Jungkook still had a view of his friends in the cafeteria and they were all watching the two of them.
"Hey um, this is my number," Dae-sung said and handed Jungkook a piece of paper. "I know I literally don't know you, but, you know, I’m all about living in the moment and you're...well you know. So...yeah that's my number. Call it if you want." He spoke calmly and that deep voice was still music to Jungkook's ears.
"It was nice to meet you, Tae, I mean Dae...sung.
"You too, Jungkook." Jungkook could only nod as Dae-sung walked away confidently.
Jungkook put the piece of paper in his pocket and scurried out of the cafeteria.
The sun was setting in the sky, which meant it was prime time for his kind. And he was already feeling hungry again.
"Hey, why are there fences around cemeteries?" Jin appeared back at Jungkook's side, seemingly out of nowhere. Nari came up on Jin's other side.
"Because people are dying to get it," Nari finished the joke.
"Gross, you finish his jokes now? Who are you?" Jungkook muttered to Nari.
She shrugged. "I've just heard them all by now. He tells them ALL the time. And I mean all the time."
"I don't like what you're insinuating," Jungkook said and put his fingers in his ears.
"So how'd it go with Dae-hottie or whatever his name was?" Jin asked.
Jungkook stopped in the middle of the sidewalk and dug the piece of paper out of his pocket. He held it out to Jin. "I need you to take this. Get rid of it. I can't do it," Jungkook said.
Jin took the piece of paper hesitantly and looked at Nari. Jungkook hated when they looked at each other like that, like they had their own language and he wasn't a part of it. "He gave you his number?" Nari asked.
"Yes, but I can't call it. I can't insert myself into his life. I'll kill him."
"You don't know that," Jin said, sounding like a sincere friend for the first time that day.
"Jin," Jungkook said in monotone. He glanced at Nari and then back at Jin. "You killed her. I will kill him. I don't know why he looked exactly like Tae. I don't want to know. I can't. I just want him to live."
Nari touched Jungkook's arm tenderly. "I'm sorry," she said.
"Don't be sorry for me. I'm just doing what's right."
Jin nodded and put the number in his pocket. "We should get going, then," he said to Nari.
She nodded and took Jin's hand. They started walking away without another word to Jungkook. But then, Jin stopped and turned back around. "Where are you staying tonight?" Jin asked Jungkook.
"I don't know."
"Come back with us," Jin said.
"Jin, you don't-"
"We have plenty of room, and the place is nice, it's by the water. It'll be like old times," Jin continued and Jungkook could see how much he wanted him to accept the invitation.
Jungkook looked behind him. He saw Dae-sung and his friends leaving the cafeteria. Actually, he just saw Tae. Tae walking down the sidewalk away from him, in the fading light from the sun, the sky a blue and pink and purple backdrop against a beautiful boy who still had Jungkook's heart.
Upon turning around, there was Jin and Nari, hand in hand, against the part of the sky that was already dark, bathing them in shadows and mystery. But they were also familiar. They were friendly faces. They were the part of the past that still remained. They were really all Jungkook had left.
"Okay. Okay, I'll come with you," he decided. He didn't look back again at the light. At Taehyung. He only walked forward, into the darkness, and caught up with Nari and Jin. Nari linked arms with both of them and leaned her head against Jin.
Jungkook kept his gaze forward, into the night. It was where they belonged. The darkness always won when it came to them. It always would. Taehyung had escaped that darkness, in death. Jungkook had not. He wasn't going to bring anyone else into it though. He was going to make the most of what he had. He didn't have Taehyung and maybe he never did really, but he did have Jin and Nari and the darkness. And that could be enough. It had to be enough.