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Chapter Text

Neurological safety and security in the Evangelion Project - a lack of defence in depth

Akagi R, Ibuki M
Tokyo-3, 2017

The primary security boundary in the interface between the pilot and the Evangelion consists of the filter circuits integrated into the Entry Plug. Early designs of this interface featured additional filter circuits in the A10 neural connectors worn by the pilots. Once the Entry Plug's filter circuits were proven to be more than adequate for all reasonable situations, the filters in the A10 connectors were removed on the grounds that they impaired the pilot's synchronization ratio.

In this paper, the authors report on the psychological and physiological consequences of this design decision for two pilots who underwent emergency dual synchronization during the Angel attack on the UN Pacific Fleet.

Chapter Text

Deputy Commander Fuyutsuki Kōzō looked at the red-headed teenage girl in front of him and wondered again why he had ever let himself be caught up in this madness. "Pilot Sōryū, what was your rationale for bringing Pilot Ikari into the Entry Plug with you?"

Asuka glanced sideways at Captain Katsuragi as if seeking comfort or support. "I... The safest place in an Angel battle is the inside of an Entry Plug, sir."

Fuyutsuki sighed and raised an eyebrow. "While certainly true, that doesn't quite justify your behaviour. Let me phrase my question differently. What was your rationale for putting Pilot Ikari in a situation where bringing him with you into the Entry Plug was the most suitable choice?"

"I wanted to show off my Evangelion to him," admitted Asuka, cheeks colouring as she again looked towards Katsuragi. "We were right there in the hangar when the alarm sounded."

"I can understand that. Contrary to popular belief, I too was once young and enthusiastic." Fuyutsuki glanced down at the slim manila folder containing the initial report from the Pacific Fleet. "The admiral had a great deal to say about this incident, very little of it friendly, and I will be directing most of it to the attention of NERV Berlin. Their decision to transport your Evangelion by sea fitted with standard B-Type equipment is a shocking oversight."

Asuka frowned at him, but kept her reply brief. "Thank you, sir."

Fuyutsuki sat back in his chair. "Captain Katsuragi, do you have anything to add?"

"You did a good job out there, Asuka," said Katsuragi, smiling. "Nobody could have done better."

"Thank you, ma'am." Asuka looked like she'd bitten down on a lemon.

"Well, Pilot Sōryū," said Fuyutsuki, doing his best to keep his tone light, "you are very welcome here at NERV Tokyo-3. Dismissed."

Lieutenant Ibuki Maya had been staring at the psychograph readings on her computer screen for ten minutes before raising an empty coffee cup to her lips sparked a sudden insight. She switched over to a command line window, tapped in a few adjustments to the analysis settings, and rose wearily from a chair really not designed to be occupied for hours on end. "Akagi-sempai, would you like another coffee?"

Akagi Ritsuko rose equally wearily from her seat, shaking her head. "Not now. I scored some spare go-pills from an SDF pilot a few days ago. Should still be some left, just let me find them."

Maya looked down into her empty cup, trying to hide her shock. "I... I don't take drugs, sempai."

"Caffeine just makes you wired. Speed makes you smarter." Ritsuko grinned. "Paul Erdős stopped taking speed once. He didn't write a single paper that month."

"I'll just, uh, stick to coffee, sempai," squeaked Maya as she retreated from their shared office. Walking as briskly as she could manage down the hall, Maya found Captain Katsuragi standing opposite the coffee machine, muttering to herself.

"Ah, Captain? Are you all right?" asked Maya.

"Oh, just paperwork. The fleet wants us to pay for its ships. Replacing those destroyers costs less than the repair bill from Operation Yashima, but it's the principle of the thing. We're not the Navy's paymasters." Katsuragi knocked back the contents of her cup. "How's life treating you, Lieutenant?"

Maya hesitated for a moment, wondering whether to mention her sempai's little habit. "Um, I had an unusual offer this evening," she said, as she keyed in her order on the coffee machine. "And I think I'm getting somewhere with the data from Asuka's fight."

"Your sempai trying to lead you into temptation, is she?" asked Katsuragi, waggling her eyebrows.

Maya felt her cheeks burning. "Captain! Nothing like that! She just, uh, likes something a bit stronger than coffee to keep her going."

"Oh, right. Yeah, that sounds like Ritz. Anyway. I'll get back to my numbers and let you get back to yours. G'night!"

Maya grabbed her coffee from the machine and headed back down the hall. As she approached the office door, she heard Ritsuko cursing loudly.

"That pig! That absolute pig! I'll..." Ritsuko tailed off as Maya walked back in. "Um. It seems I don't have those go-pills any more. Could I trouble you to get me a coffee?"

Maya sighed. "Sempai. I think I'm getting somewhere with these psychographs. Let me just check the results first."

Settling into her seat, Maya unlocked her screen and grinned. The idea she'd had when she ran out of coffee had worked. "Sempai, I know what's wrong with these psychographs."

"Go on."

"The Entry Plug protects the pilot from being contaminated by the Evangelion, but in a dual sync scenario, the pilots are both on the same side of the filter circuit. At high sync ratio..."

"I'll be damned." Ritsuko smacked herself on the forehead. "Misato mentioned Asuka and Shinji both seemed a little off after the battle, and not just in the way Shinji always is. I'll get them in for a sync test ASAP."

Chapter Text

Ikari Shinji lay in the darkness staring at his bedroom ceiling, unable to sleep despite an exhausting day. He'd wanted to say something to Asuka - it felt strange to think so familiarly of a girl he'd only just met, but it felt even stranger not to - as she came out of her debriefing, but the thunderous look on her face as she stalked down the hallway made him hold his tongue. Misato had come out a few minutes later, apologized to him for having "all the paperwork ever" to do, and asked a Section Two agent to drive him home.

Now he was stuck with only his racing thoughts for company. Synchronizing to Asuka's Unit 02 had been a very different experience to synchronizing to Unit 01, yet even that paled in comparison to the strangeness of having someone else in the loop. He'd tried to concentrate on the sensory inputs of the Evangelion itself, but keeping Asuka's thoughts out of his head entirely had proven impossible. Given the way she'd looked at him after they finally got out of the Entry Plug, he suspected she'd had exactly the same problem in reverse.

Some of those thoughts wouldn't leave his head. For her, piloting Eva was the best possible thing in the world. She was fascinated by the ponytailed man accompanying her - Mr Kaji - and determined to win his favour, even though it had been perfectly clear to Shinji that Kaji was far more interested in Misato, who he'd obviously met before. Her thoughts about Shinji, in turn, were a confusing muddle he couldn't follow and couldn't forget.

That was a little, he conceded, like his own thoughts about Asuka. She was pretty. She was good at piloting Eva. She was full of herself. She had a very short temper. He didn't really like her, but he still wanted to get to know her better. He wanted to understand where those thoughts stuck in his head came from.

Shaking his head, he got up and walked through to the kitchen. Maybe a glass of water would help.

Asuka Langley Sōryū lay in the darkness staring at the ceiling of Kaji's guest bedroom, her eyes still red from crying. She'd tried to make another pass at Kaji when they got to his apartment, and it had gone even worse than the first. It would have been easier if he'd said the same things she was thinking about herself now, or even if he'd just been cold and blunt, but no. He'd had to be kind about it and point out his own vices.

Her luggage being a casualty of the battle didn't help. NERV had provided a change of clothes for her so she could get out of her plugsuit and shower away the LCL, of course, but going to her debriefing in a T-shirt and sweatpants - because even though this was Japan, the quartermaster didn't have a regular uniform in her size - was not an experience she wanted to repeat.

Shinji had been fine, of course. He'd gone to his debriefing in a perfectly normal shirt and slacks. Perks of being the Commander's son, she wanted to say, but the unwanted thoughts that had leaked into her head during the battle made it impossible to believe. Even she had more of a connection with her adulterous father than Shinji did with his.

Oh yes, those thoughts. She wanted them out of her head. She didn't want to know what it felt like to have your Evangelion blasted with a particle beam that made a mockery of AT Fields, and she certainly didn't want to know what that other female pilot's breast felt like - he was a pervert remembering something like that so sharply - but she couldn't quite make herself hate someone who'd watched his mother...

Someone who'd watched his mother...

She thought she'd run out of tears for one night.

Shinji was standing by the sink when the kitchen light came on. He blinked, wincing in the sudden brightness, and turned towards the door. His guardian stood there, a slightly dumbfounded look on her face. "M-Misato-san?"

"Are you all right, Shinji?"

"I'm..." Shinji glanced down at his half-empty glass. "Misato-san, is... is Asuka all right? She looked really angry when she came out of her debriefing."

Misato smirked and opened her mouth as if to crack wise, then stopped and shook her head. "I don't know. Kaji lined himself up a two-bedroom apartment. I think he took her back there. I don't think she'll be staying there long."

"You were going to say something else, weren't you?"

"I was going to say something stupid, Shinji. Grown-ups are good at that." She pulled off her beret and tossed it over her shoulder. "We say things like 'I need a beer'. Want one? It might help you sleep."

Shinji shook his head vigorously. Watching her pour cans of the stuff down her throat every night was enough to make him very sure he didn't want to try it himself. "I'll be all right. Just needed to clear my head. Good night, Misato-san. Sleep well."

Chapter Text

Misato looked at the stack of paperwork on her desk and sighed. Improbably for a Sunday morning, there was more of it than when she went to sleep the night before. Most of it, she was sure, could perfectly well be dealt with by civilian clerks, but she couldn't hand any of it off without reading it all first. She grabbed the first folder from the top of the stack and was just about to start reading when her phone rang.

"Katsuragi here," she answered.

"It's Kaji. Look, I screwed up and made a girl cry."

Misato pinched the bridge of her nose. Kaji had been back in Japan less than twenty-four hours and he was already giving her a headache. "What happened?"

"Asuka made a pass at me again. I turned her down, because hell no, and I was even nice about it, but..."

Misato leaned back and looked at the texturing pattern of the acoustic tile ceiling. "But nothing upsets a teenage girl with a crush on an older man like being reminded she's too young for him."

"Right."

"Fine. Obviously she can't stay at your place, then." Misato stuck the folder back on top of the stack and pondered the practical options.

"Obviously. Any room at yours?"

"Not rea-" She stopped, as a tolerable option came to mind. "Oh, to hell with it. Asuka can have my room. The storeroom's got a window, I don't have time to bring dates home, and I don't need any of the crap in there."

"Seriously?"

"Yes. You're paying for the removals van and the new furniture." A whimsical impulse seized her at that moment. "Oh, and for yakiniku and fancy beers for two next Saturday."

"Deal. See you later."

Misato sighed as Kaji hung up. She didn't need a teenage girl living in her apartment, she didn't need to be turning the place upside down at no notice, and she definitely didn't need to have just invited herself on a dinner date with her idiot ex. She returned the handset to the cradle, pulled her beret back on, and walked out of the office, realizing as she left that Asuka was going to need to go shopping as well.

"I'm home!" announced Misato's voice from the hallway.

Shinji started at the sound of her arrival, and nearly dropped the glass he was drying up on the floor. "Misato-san? What's wrong?"

Misato walked into the kitchen, typing a text message into her mobile phone. "That idiot Kaji upset Asuka last night, and she's moving in here."

Shinji scratched his head, trying to make sense of this announcement. He was pretty sure Asuka wouldn't want to share a room with either of them, and there wasn't a third bedroom. "Ah, Misato-san..."

"Don't worry, Shinji, your modesty will not be in peril! I'm giving her my room. I'll sleep in the storeroom." She stuffed her phone back into her jacket pocket. "They'll be here soon. I'll take Asuka clothes shopping. Could you help Kaji clear out my junk so there's room for a bed?"

Shinji felt a sudden and not-quite-unfamiliar sense of irritation with his guardian. "Why aren't you staying to help?"

"Because Asuka's luggage got trashed during the fight," replied Misato.

"... Right." Shinji sighed. He'd been hoping for a nice, quiet, relaxing day, with maybe a trip to buy groceries. At that thought, a random flicker of Asuka's tastes sprang to mind. "Asuka hates fish. Could you get some pork or chicken?"

"I'll try and fit that in. We can get delivery if it's easier." Misato paused for a moment. "Wait, how did-"

The doorbell interrupted her. "Coming!" she shouted, as she spun on her heel and headed back to the front hall. Shinji set down the glass and followed behind her, wanting to at least briefly see Asuka now instead of waiting until evening.

The front door slid open to reveal an underslept-looking and gloomy Asuka and her scruffy, ponytailed crush. "Hi Katsuragi. One Second Child, safe and sound."

Asuka sighed. "So you're taking me shopping in your uniform?"

"Only if I need to intimidate the store staff," replied Misato. "Right, Kaji. We'll be back once Asuka's got a decent set of outfits. Do try and have the removals done by then. Shinji, keep an eye on this scoundrel and make sure he doesn't try to pilfer my panties."

Shinji snorted at that remark. "As if he'd want to."

Misato gave him an odd look over her shoulder, then shook her head. "Ready, Asuka?"

"No, but let's go."

Shinji watched Misato and Asuka depart, feeling discomfited by Asuka's manner. She didn't seem like the girl he'd met yesterday. "So, ah, where do we start?" he asked Kaji.

"You're the man of the house, Shinji," said Kaji, grinning broadly. "Tell me, does Katsuragi still starfish in her sleep?"

Chapter Text

Asuka prodded half-heartedly at her lunch. Despite having only eaten half her breakfast, she just wasn't hungry. She looked up from the plate to see a worried look on Misato's face.

"Talk to me?" said Misato.

"What about?" riposted Asuka, the walls around her heart snapping up with reflexive ease.

"Why a growing teenage girl who hasn't eaten since 8am is picking at her lunch like she's stuffed, maybe."

"Not hungry."

Misato reached across the table with her chopsticks and plucked a piece of tonkatsu out of Asuka's bowl.

"Hey! That's my lunch!"

"You said you weren't hungry." Misato flashed a brief grin before turning serious again. "If you eat up, we can have this conversation later. If you don't, we'll have it right here and now."

Asuka poked at her lunch again with her own chopsticks. "Fine," she said, laying the utensils down. "Kaji's an asshole."

"I know, but that's not why he turned you down." Misato's expression went from 'serious' to 'stern'. "If anyone had got wind of him saying 'yes', he'd be having a very interesting conversation with Section Two right about now."

"What do you-" Asuka stopped as her brain caught up with Misato's implications. "But... but I asked him!"

"That just means he'd only fall down the stairs once. I know you're upset, but, well."

I mustn't run away. Asuka blinked. That was certainly a sentiment she'd never felt a need for before. "Fine, fine, I get it. You're right. Can we finish the shopping now?"

Misato smiled and nodded. "Sure. I have to warn you, though, you might not appreciate the next bit."

"Why's that?"

"Well, you're starting school with Shinji and Rei on Tuesday, so you'll need a set of school uniforms."

Asuka rolled her eyes, but bit back the urge to challenge Misato on either point. It wasn't an argument she was likely to win. "Let's get it over with."

Looking down from the balcony, Shinji watched the unmarked white van pull away. There was something suspicious about the removals men Kaji had brought in; they were rather better spoken than he would've expected, and they'd steadfastly kept their gloves and long-sleeved turtlenecks on despite doing manual labour in Japan's eternal summer. "Uh, Mr Kaji, who were those men?" he asked as the van disappeared in the distance.

"Oh, some guys whose boss still owes me a few more favours," replied Kaji, flicking imaginary dust off the front of his shirt. "Don't worry, they're not going to steal any of Katsuragi's junk. It's all going to sit perfectly safe in a warehouse until she wants it back. Their boss knows what's good for him."

Shinji could think of a dozen more questions he wanted to ask, but somehow, he suspected he didn't want the answers. "Right. So, uh, how long have you known Misato?"

"We met at uni. We saw each other for a while. It..." Kaji looked up at the sky for a moment. "It worked, but it didn't work out."

"What do you mean?"

"Men and women are different, Shinji. And I don't just mean in the fun ways." Kaji mimed voluptuous breasts with his hands. "Whatever we were looking for, I don't think we found it."

"You don't know?"

"Twenty isn't really old enough to know what you're looking for. Hell, I'm not even sure about thirty."

Shinji found himself wondering why, exactly, Asuka was so keen on Kaji. From a brief impression, he seemed to veer between flippant and just plain evasive at the drop of a hat. "What did you do to upset Asuka?"

"I didn't do anything I shouldn't. Anything else is her story to tell."

Shinji scowled. "That's not an answer."

"True. On the other hand, she hardly knows you and I'm not going to tell tales behind her back. If she wants you to know, I'm sure she'll tell you."

"She-" Gritting his teeth, Shinji held back his outburst. Kaji had a point, and talking about why it might not be as valid as he thought didn't seem like a good idea. "Fine, you're right."

Chapter Text

Asuka sat on the bed in her new room, contemplating her situation.

On the up side, the bed was reasonably comfortable, the wardrobes and drawers had swallowed her new purchases with room to spare, and the room itself wasn't as pokey as she'd been expecting from a Japanese apartment.

On the down side, it felt pretty soulless without the nick-nacks her room back home had accumulated, and there was a faint, unnameable smell that the air freshener Shinji must have spritzed the room with couldn't conceal.

And of course, there was the door. The sliding door. The sliding door with no damned lock. It was ridiculous, asking her to share an apartment with a teenage boy and not giving her a door that locked. She yanked it open, rollers clattering noisily against the rails, and stepped out into the living room as soon as the door thumped against its end stop.

Misato was sat on the couch in a skimpy tank top and cutoffs, leafing through a magazine with two buff-looking men in speedos on the front cover. Asuka snorted in disgust, and her erstwhile guardian looked up at her. "What's up, Asuka?"

"This stupid door doesn't lock and the room smells funny and why are you reading porn in the living room?"

"It's not porn," replied Misato, laying the open magazine flat on the coffee table. "See?"

Asuka hesitated, wary of Misato's tendency to tease, and looked down. There wasn't a human in sight on the two-page spread - just pictures of exercise machines and what looked like price/feature comparison boxes above them. Cheeks burning, she tried to regain some kind of composure. "I didn't know you were in charge of the PT programme here."

Misato smiled wryly. "Neither did I until Fuyutsuki dropped it in my lap last week. One of our visitors from the JSDF kicked up a stink about us not having one."

"Right." Asuka's stomach rumbled, reminding her she hadn't finished her lunch. "When's dinner?"

"Half an hour," replied Shinji from the kitchen. "Chicken curry and rice."

With a belly full of beer and Shjnji's cooking, Misato leaned back in her chair and pondered her teenage charges' behaviour. Neither of them quite seemed themselves today. Asuka was actually backing down from confrontations, however gracelessly, and Shinji had acquired a sharp tongue from somewhere. The first could be chalked up to the thing with that idiot Kaji, but the second didn't really seem to have a cause behind it.

Her mobile buzzed annoyingly from the living room. Grumbling under her breath she headed over to see who was texting her on a Sunday evening.

It was Ritsuko. "We need Shinji and Asuka for emergency testing tomorrow morning. Everything's set up and I've told the school Shinji won't be in."

"I'll be in my room," said Misato, heading down the short corridor. "Play nice."

Her new room was, she realized, unpleasantly poky, but she was going to have to put up with it. "Emergency?" she texted back.

"We need clean psychograph readings. Dual sync is an untested configuration."

She scowled at her phone. "What's wrong with the readings you've got from the Angel encounter? If there's something wrong with my pilots I need to know."

"Interference. There's only so much the MAGI can do with that data."

Misato gave an exasperated sigh. "Fine. We're going to talk about this tomorrow."

Shinji hummed an unfamiliar tune to himself as he washed the curry residue out of the saucepan. It was an aggressive and choppy tune, and he'd never actually heard it, but there was something remarkably appealing about it.

"I didn't think you'd be into Rammstein," remarked Asuka from her seat at the table.

"Rammstein?"

She stared at him like he'd grown a second head. "You're humming one of their best songs!"

Shinji glanced nervously at the front door. "Oh. It's one of your favourites, right?"

"Yes." Asuka looked past him, also keeping an eye on the front door. "You... you got that from my brain. When we fought the Angel."

"I guess I must have—" He paused as he heard the front door opening. He wanted to explore this some more with Asuka, but not with Misato listening. "Later?"

Asuka nodded. "Sure."

"Hey kids, you've got a sync test first thing tomorrow," announced Misato, her annoyance with the situation plain to see in her expression. "And I have a meeting with Ritz at the same time."

Chapter Text

Asuka had never been bothered by the figure-hugging fit of her plugsuit. She liked the feel of the hi-tech fabric against her skin and the way it conformed to her movements without pinching or bunching. It let people know who she was - the pilot of Evangelion Unit 02 - and if some of the gazes it attracted were improper or disapproving, well, those prudes and perverts were beneath her notice.

And yet, this morning she stood in the locker room with her still-slack plugsuit hanging loosely around her body, hesitating for once to activate the tensioning system. Today, the prospect of those improper gazes felt... troubling. Unpleasant. Intimidating.

She slapped her hand against the locker. "Stupid Shinji," she muttered. It had to be something from his brain, another piece of him that had leaked into her. She triggered the tensioning system, checked that her A10 connectors were in place, and walked out into the hallway.

"Ah, Misato. Have a seat."

Misato hefted a stack of papers off the visitor's chair in Ritsuko's office and onto the floor before sitting down. "All right, Ritz, why don't you tell me what this is all about?"

"Dual sync is a completely untested scenario. We didn't even know whether an Evangelion would function with two pilots." Ritsuko leaned back in her chair. "Obviously it did, but the results just give us a new set of questions to answer."

Misato pinched the bridge of her nose. "So what's wrong with my pilots?"

"It looks like there was some mental contamination," said Ritsuko. "Maya spotted something on the psychograph readings, and given what you said about Shinji, it all fits. What we need now is a clearer sense of how much."

"Couldn't you at least pretend to care about them?"

"If I didn't care, Shinji would be at school and Asuka would be having the day off." Ritsuko fished her cigarettes out of her pocket. "Now if you'll excuse me, I have a nicotine habit to feed and a simulator test to supervise."

Asuka walked into the simulator bay to find Shinji leaning against a safety railing, tapping his foot on the floor. The sight of him in a correctly fitted plugsuit instead of her spare was, she had to concede, quite appealing. "Hey, Shinji," she called to him.

Shinji looked up and smiled at her. "Hi Asuka. How are you feeling?"

She wanted to say 'fine', but the word stuck in her throat. He'd know she was bullshitting. "Weird," she admitted. "Does... does it bother you, wearing a plugsuit?"

"I'm mostly getting used to it. I still don't like the way Technician Kimura looks at me when I'm wearing it, though."

Asuka smiled weakly at the confirmation that that thought was one of his. "I... we should make some time to talk. About things. You know."

"I know a good café," said Shinji. "We could go there when we're done here?"

Asuka hesitated. It would look like a date. She'd look like she was on a date with this... actually kind of cute and talented boy, who'd got into an Eva even when he didn't want to, because his father was going to force a wounded girl to do it instead. What could it hurt? "Sure. But we're paying for our own drinks."

"Don't want to give people the wrong impression, right?"

"R-right!" Asuka felt her cheeks flushing. Having someone around who actually understood her was going to take some getting used to. "So why are we waiting?"

"Lieutenant Ibuki says there's a circuit fault with the simulator and she didn't want to make us wait inside the plugs."

"Huh. Someone nice works here?"

Shinji smiled wryly. "There had to be someone, I guess."

The PA system chimed. "We've traced the fault and replaced the damaged parts," announced Lieutenant Ibuki. "Simulator plugs will be open shortly."

Misato paced nervously at the window of the observation bay. This wasn't like waiting for a live launch. She was in her element there, directing her pilots in a tactical situation.

It was more like when she'd been waiting to hear about her mother's condition. There was nothing she could do, and even once she had an answer it might not change anything.

"Simulator online," announced Lieutenant Aoba, leaning back in his chair. "Looks pretty boring."

"It's supposed to be," responded Ritsuko. "We want clean psychograph readings. Ibuki, enable synchronization."

Misato turned her attention to the status displays that were now flickering into life. There wasn't much to see yet, but it was actual information to focus on.

A simulated world flickered into being around Asuka. It wasn't really an improvement on the inside of an entry plug; she was surrounded by a flat, featureless plain under a flat, overcast sky. She thumbed the commlink switch. "Hey, what's with this simulation? We always had scenery in Berlin."

A video pane showing Dr Akagi popped up in her view. "We'll be loading a real scenario shortly. We need a psychograph baseline from a zero-threat environment, without your Evangelion complicating the results."

Another pane showing Shinji in his entry plug appeared. "Could be worse. At least the sky and the ground are different colours."

Asuka raised an eyebrow. "Seriously?"

"That was a programming error, Shinji," said Dr Akagi, before suddenly frowning. "Talk amongst yourselves. I may be some time." Her video pane vanished.

Asuka tapped her fingers on the control grips. She didn't want to talk about that over the commlink, and there wasn't anything else she could think of worth talking about. There was the other pilot, she supposed, but...

Her cheeks flushed as the unwanted memory from Shinji replayed itself. No. Definitely not talking about her.

Ritsuko stared intently at the psychograph traces on the wall display. The cross-contamination between the pilots was clearly highlighted by the MAGI's analysis, but the observable effects were not at all what she'd have expected. Neither pilot had exhibited any frank psychiatric symptoms, just modest behavioural changes.

She sighed. There were bound to be latent issues. Maybe a stress test was needed. "Maya, load Test Angel 16."

"16, sempai? Isn't that the—"

"Yes. Asuka's been trained properly and Shinji has field experience. They should be able to handle it."

Misato interjected in a tone that would have frozen a penguin to death on the spot. "Would you like to explain to me why Lieutenant Ibuki is cavilling over your choice of testing material for my pilots, Doctor Akagi?"

"I... have to concede her point, Captain," said Ritsuko, weighing her words carefully. "The baseline data is solid. Their stability in light of the data is surprising, but I'm sure some more analysis will give us some insight. I think we can let them go about their day in peace."

Misato's voice thawed very slightly. "I'm glad to hear it. We should have a proper planning session soon."

Ritsuko toggled the commlink. "Change of plan. The data we have is enough to work with, so we'll be giving you the rest of the day to yourselves. Shinji, Rei will be collecting the day's schoolwork for you. Make sure you're in when she comes to drop it off."

Chapter Text

Asuka was sitting in a café with her fellow pilot to discuss serious matters that might impact their combat performance.

The fact that her fellow pilot was a boy her own age who looked good in a plugsuit and actually understood some of what she was going through didn't make it a date. After all, if it was a date she'd be making him pick up the tab.

She set down her lemonade – there was no way she was drinking anything hot after a kilometre and a half walk in Japan's infernal humidity – and looked at her fellow pilot. "So, Shinji. We need to talk about... that."

"Yes."

There was a pause. Asuka realized she was looking a boy in the eyes at a café and not saying anything. Quite a cute boy. He wasn't as handsome as Kaji, of course, but Kaji was too handsome for his own good, and an asshole to boot.

Cheeks turning pink, she dipped her gaze. "So! Where are we going to start?"

"You like piloting Eva, don't you?"

"Yes. It's what I'm best at, and when the next Angel comes, I'll show you what I can do. You... you don't, do you?"

He shook his head vigorously. "It's... I didn't want to, but he was going to make Ayanami do it if I didn't. She had a broken arm and bandages everywhere and he was going to send her out to fight an Angel."

"Ayanami's the one you fell on top of, isn't she?"

Shinji blushed furiously and looked away. "You got... you got that? When we were in the entry plug?"

"Yes, I did." Why wouldn't that verdammt memory just go away? She didn't want to know what Ayanami's boob felt like. Especially if it felt nice. "What were you doing?"

"Nothing like... like that." He took a deep breath. Then another. "I went to give her her replacement security pass. She hadn't shut her front door properly and I went inside. She came out of the shower and walked towards me and I panicked and somehow we fell over and my hand ended up on her... her chest."

"You know that makes no fucking sense, right?"

"Yes." He looked up at the ceiling. "Can we talk about something else?"

She took mercy on him. She needed him to stay mentally fit to pilot. She'd need support if they had another Angel like that blue one. "Fine, but we need to talk about girls' privacy later. So, you liked that Rammstein song, I guess?"

His eyes lit up at that. "Yes! It wasn't at all the sort of thing I usually listen to but I'd like to hear it properly."

A plan came together in Asuka's head as she took a generous swig of her remaining lemonade. She could build a stronger connection with her fellow pilot and replace some of the music that had found its way to the bottom of the Pacific. "I think I saw a record shop a few doors down. Let's go shopping."

"Sounds good," said Shinji. "I just need to—"

Even attenuated by distance and double glazing, Asuka recognized the sound that interrupted his response. "Get down!" she snapped, ducking under the table to put the decorative planter between herself and the window as people outside started screaming. "That was a gun!"

Shinji joined her under the table, looking distinctly wild-eyed. "Why is someone shooting?"

Asuka shook her head, fishing her new NERV-issued phone out of her bag. "Who cares? That's security's job." She flipped open the mollyguard on the back cover and held down the panic button. "Let's see if they're on the ball."

Rei Ayanami was prone to spend her afternoons at school in a daze, not really listening to what the teacher was saying. Knowing her purpose as she did, she saw no value in absorbing knowledge she would never need.

The buzzing of her NERV-issue phone intruded on her daze, bringing her instantly to full alertness in a conditioned reflex. She rose from her seat and headed for the door.

"Miss Ayanami, are you—"

"I must respond to an emergency signal," she said, not even breaking stride as she interrupted the teacher's query.

Stepping out into the corridor, she looked at the message on her phone. "PILOTS IKARI AND SOURYUU UNDER FIRE. PROTECTION PROTOCOLS ACTIVATED. PICKUP DRIVER EN ROUTE."

The feeling she experienced as she hurried through the school to the designated collection point was the same novel and unpleasant one she had felt when Pilot Ikari was injured fighting the octahedral Angel. It was not part of her purpose, and that fact bothered her almost as much as the feeling itself.

She swiped her NERV ID over a proximity reader and pushed open the door that led to the collection point. The floor was still covered in construction dust that puffed up around her ankles as she walked to the reinforced door, and she made a mental note of the shortcomings in the cleanup work. Her own health would not be impaired, but an ordinary human pilot might suffer respiratory distress as a result.

The green light above the door winked on, confirming that the Section Two van was correctly positioned for pickup. Rei swiped her card over the second proximity reader and stepped directly into the van's cabin.

As it moved off, Rei wondered why anyone would start attacking the other pilots.

Chapter Text

Asuka hated waiting.

With a nutter with a rifle overlooking the street outside, it was all she could do.

She looked over at Shinji. He was holding together, just about. That was good. He wasn't going to freak out on her yet. She took a deep breath. "Looks like we'll have to postpone the record shopping," she quipped.

He made a short, tense sound that might have been a laugh. "I guess so." He fished out his phone, holding it in a white-knuckled grip. "Have they told you anything?"

She glanced down at her own, and started to say 'no' when it buzzed in her hand. The message from Misato read "Section Two en route. Sit tight. Confirm response."

"Confirmed." Asuka texted back. She wasn't about to try texting more than that in Japanese. She smiled at Shinji. "Someone's on the way. Misato says 'sit tight'."

Shinji looked at his phone, and then back at Asuka. "I... I guess we do that then."

"Yeah. Not the best afternoon out I've had."

Dressed in the only garment remotely as comfortable as her own skin, the icon of her publicly admitted purpose, Rei Ayanami sat in the locker room and waited.

An outside observer might have noted her relaxed muscles, neutral expression, and static pose, and from these things inferred a placid mental state.

They would – for once – be wrong. Two subjects preyed on her mind, leaving it in turmoil behind the mask of her self-discipline, and with no credible prospect of an imminent Angel attack, there was no higher priority to focus on.

The fortress city of Tokyo-3 was the ultimate bastion of humanity, the heart of its defences against the Angels, and the Evangelion pilots were its foremost defenders. She could not rightly comprehend how and why they could come under fire from a human.

There was also the matter of the feelings she was experiencing regarding Pilot Ikari. His presence was pleasant, and the prospect of him being injured or distressed was... not pleasant.

A concept became an urge became an impulse.

With the rest of her fingers plaited, her left thumb rolled over her right, and her right, in turn, over her left.

She noted the action to be relaxing, and repeated it.

Shinji looked at his phone again. No new messages. Nothing to tell him when Section Two would be turning up like Misato said. Maybe they'd got stuck. Maybe the—

"Hey, Shinji." Asuka's tone sounded brittle, but it was still something to focus on. "When we go to the record store, let's pick something out for each other."

He looked across at the beautiful red-haired girl he was hiding under a table with and took in the worried smile on her face. Words. She's talking to me. Use words. "I... I'd like that a lot. We should do that."

She extended a hand. "Shake on it?"

Nervously, he reached out and took her hand in his. The contact was... nice. Her hand was warm. Her grip was firm. He managed to firm up his own grip and shake her hand properly and tried not to think too hard about the fact that he was touching a girl and a girl was touching him and—

"Then it's a deal," she said. "No getting shot before then, all right? Even a great pilot like me needs backup."

"All right," he said, cheeks burning as Asuka's hand slipped out of his grip.

Outside, there was an explosion.

Seated in one of the observer stations, Misato stared at the command centre's tactical display in disbelief. 'Air-launched HE missile' was not how she'd expected the SDF counter-terrorist unit to deal with the sniper.

"I believe your people are safe," said the SDF duty officer to her right.

"A missile seems like overkill."

"The upper storeys were vacant. You value your people, Captain, and we value ours. Read about Charles Whitman."

Chapter Text

Misato hated Commander Ikari's office. It had very obviously been designed to intimidate whoever visited it, and the man made full use of that effect. The inevitable familiarity that came with visiting it in the line of duty softened the impact, but couldn't quite suppress it. "Six dead civilians – it could be eight by tomorrow – and twenty assorted lesser injuries," she said. "The SDF killed whoever did it so hard we can't even use dental records."

"I agree that Colonel Nakajima's choice of tactics was questionable," replied Ikari. Misato caught the telltale shift in his facial muscles that said he was smirking behind those steepled hands and amber glasses. "I will express our displeasure to General Kurita in person. Please attend to your pilots. It would be inconvenient if they were to be incapacitated by this incident. Dismissed."

That's your fucking son, you ingrate. Allegedly. "Of course, sir," she said, turning to depart.

For a moment, as she made the long walk out of the Commander's office, she could have sworn she heard another voice, faint and muffled, from behind her. However piqued her curiosity might have been, though, she had no desire to linger, or even look behind her as she departed.

Sat with his gaze directed at a safety poster on the break room wall in front of him, Shinji wasn't really looking at the poster, or anything else.

The van didn't have windows in the back, and Section Two had parked it very close to the café door when they came to collect him and Asuka, but it hadn't blocked his view of the square completely as he emerged. He'd seen a man who'd been shot in the head, and a little girl tugging at him like she was trying to wake him up.

He knew people had gotten killed during Angel attacks, of course, but there was... distance to it. He hadn't seen the bodies. He hadn't even been to visit Touji's little sister who was in hospital with broken legs thanks to falling rubble because he hadn't been good enough to actually fight the Third Angel. The Angels' victims had been inside buildings, or tanks crushed by Sachiel, or planes vapourized by Ramiel's particle beams, or ships sunk when Gaghiel broke their hulls open, and for all he could tell, the Angels were just monsters. There didn't seem to be any kind of conscious intent behind their violence – they just destroyed whatever threatened them or got between them and their goal.

This was something a man had done. One of the billions of people he was fighting the Angels to save. A man had gone up a building with a gun and started shooting people as they went about their daily business. They weren't even people he'd have any particular reason to hate. Just... people.

A red and black shape moved between him and the poster. "Shinji? Shinji, how are you feeling?"

Shinji blinked and shook his head, then blushed as he realized he was now basically staring at Misato's... Misato. "I... uh... why did..." He rubbed his face. "Why did that..."

"We don't know yet, Shinji," said Misato, squatting down so her face was level with his. "But we're going to find out, even though the SDF blew him to pieces."

Shinji looked around, and realized he and Misato were the only people in the room. "Wh-where's Asuka?"

As if on cue, the red-haired girl emerged from the women's restroom looking slightly dishevelled and even paler than normal, with one hand clapped over her abdomen. "Right here, id— Shinji. Can we go home now, Misato?"

"Yes," said Misato, pulling her beret out from under her epaulette strap and getting to her feet. "I'll get us a takeaway. And then we can... talk, I guess. If you want to."

Asuka pulled a face. "Nothing too greasy. Please."

Maya sat at the MAGI cluster's main visualization terminal, with the file the Section Two agent had provided open in her lap. She'd fed the first section into the hopper on the scanner as soon as she saw one of the photographs, and moved on to delivering the drier, more technical information by voice.

"Bullets recovered from semi-hard targets consistent with use of .338 Lapua Magnum," she read aloud. "Attacker fired from the 15th floor of the Yamagawa Building. Victims did not hold high-clearance roles."

Meaningless streams of pixels ran up the side of the visualization terminal, letting Maya know that the system was working on the information she was providing, and a list of names started appearing, followed by a red-boxed prompt. "CORRELATION OF EVIDENCE REQUIRES INTERROGATION OF JSDF SYSTEMS. THE IDENTITY OF THE CONFIRMING OPERATOR WILL BE RECORDED TO NERV SYSTEMS. PROCEED?"

Maya took a deep breath. NERV had authority to do this sort of thing, but there was still something intimidating about the prospect of actually doing it. "Proceed," she said.

The prompt vanished, and the pixel bands at the sides widened to represent the heightened activity. Another prompt appeared. "ANALYSIS TIME AT CURRENT SYSTEM LOAD: 17 HOURS 23 MINUTES. NO FURTHER DATA REQUIRED AT THIS TIME."

Maya scooped the contents of the scanner's output hopper back into the folder without looking at it, and stashed the folder in one of the locking drawers under the terminal. "Suspend display," she ordered the system. There wouldn't be much point in leaving the terminal running once she'd left for the evening.

Chapter Text

When the sun rose that Tuesday, Rei was already out of bed, recovering her hateful garments from where she had flung them the previous evening. The same conditioning that allowed a simple signal to break her habitual daze in an instant had instilled expectations about what would follow from an alert. Those expectations had not been fulfilled, and her senses were undimmed even after a fitful and near-sleepless night. The bedsheets were no more pleasant than her clothes, and even her own hair brushing against her neck when she turned her head had become a source of irritation. She dumped the previous day's garments into the laundry hamper and pondered her situation.

Staying at home was out of the question; for all that her attendance was pointless, it would be unpleasant to have to explain such a large wilful deviation from routine to the Commander or Dr Akagi.

She could not plead a gastrointestinal upset; her biochemical makeup was anathema to every pathogen and parasite known to humanity, and for all that she found the tastes and textures of flesh unpleasant, she had no dietary intolerances in the biological sense.

Pondering that last point, Rei walked into the kitchen. The Section Two agent who had helped her move her things – such as they were – into the apartment had left some jars of herbs and spices in one of the cupboards. She had never even bothered to unseal them, having no context for how they might be used. She picked up one of the jars, pondering the flat yellowish seeds and red flakes inside, and remembered that humans sometimes used strong, ostensibly unpleasant stimuli to distract themselves from weaker but more vexing stimuli.

She peeled the plastic seal off the jar and unscrewed the lid.

Shoulders squared in the best impression of "imperious" she could manage, Asuka swept her gaze over the class, contemplating the people she was about to spend six hours a day with.

There was Shinji, of course, but thinking about that too much was a bad idea.

There was the jock and the nerd who'd been with Shinji on the Over the Rainbow. The nerd flinched and the jock met her gaze with a scowl.

There was the blue-haired pilot – Ayanami, was it? She looked back at Asuka with a terrifying intensity that didn't mesh with that memory of Shinji's.

One of the girls, who'd been "blessed" by her hormones, smirked; the rest had nothing to make them stand out.

"Good morning," she said. "I'm Asuka Langley Souryuu. I'm here to protect you all from the Angels, and if anyone sticks a love letter in my locker I'll make him eat it."

A hushed murmur ran around the classroom, only to be stilled when the aged fossil purportedly employed as their teacher cleared his throat. "Thank you, Miss Souryuu. Please be seated. Gentlemen, please remember that lockers are not mailboxes."

Asuka walked over to the desk in front of Ayanami. Up close, she could see that her fellow pilot's expression was not so much one of "intensity" as one of discomfort. "Hi," said Asuka before settling into her seat.

"Good morning, Pilot Souryuu." Ayanami paused and tilted her head. "You remind me of Pilot Ikari. Can we talk later?"

The teacher started speaking in a flat, droning voice that could almost have been calculated to make his pupils zone out. "Now, in the wake of Second Impact, old Tokyo was struck by both geological upheaval and a deliberate nuclear attack..."

Sitting up on the roof with Rei and Asuka, Shinii stared in shock as Rei produced a jar of chilli flakes from her bag and shook a generous dose out onto her lunch. "Ah, Ayanami, are you—"

"My clothes are deeply uncomfortable," replied Rei. "Intense sensory stimuli make it less noticeable. Capsaicin is a convenient source."

Asuka snorted. "I know these uniforms are ridiculous, but they're not that bad, are they?"

Rei took a bite of her lunch before responding. "Cloth is unpleasant, and my senses are heightened due to yesterday's alert not bringing me into combat."

"Why don't you tell Dr Akagi?" asked Shinji.

"You were visibly distressed by the condition of my apartment. Dr Akagi is not." Rei took another bite of her lunch. "She is not concerned with my comfort."

His opinion of the scientist lurching further downward, Shinji decided to move the conversation on. "I guess that wasn't what you wanted to talk to us about, though."

"You are experiencing mutual mental contamination," said Rei. "It is a very strange sight. Have you touched each other since then?"

"What the hell kind of question is that?" asked Asuka, scowling at the bluenette as she devoured more of her chilli-strewn lunch.

"It's a Rei kind of question," said Shinji. "You get used to it. Anyway. No, we haven't touched each other since we left the entry plug."

"Thank you, Pilot Ikari."

"You said it was a strange sight. What do you mean?"

"I may have said too much. You are..." Rei tilted her head, then smiled very slightly. "You are Evangelion pilots. Your performance against the Angels would be well served by understanding your situation. This is not an ideal venue. May I come home with you this afternoon?"

Shinji smiled back at Rei. "All right by me," he said.

Asuka looked at Rei and shifted uncomfortably. "I... guess. I can't really argue with the idea."

Rei's smile widened a little further. "I look forward to visiting you."

Seated in his office, Kouzou looked across the shougi table at his superior. "The First Child is connecting with the other pilots," he observed, moving a pawn.

"If her loyalty wavers, she can be replaced. If it doesn't, she becomes a means to influence the others." Gendou dropped his bishop in an attacking position. "The scenario is not unacceptably perturbed."

It was a bold move. Kouzou sat back in his chair and pondered it. "What is the Committee's angle?"

"Irrelevant." Gendou looked at the clock. "I have an appointment with a uniformed fool. Excuse me. Let us continue this later."

"Of course."

Chapter Text

The three pilots sat around Misato's dining table, with Asuka and Shinji facing each other and Rei sat at the end of the table watching them both. Shinji's right hand was palm-down on the table, and Asuka's left was palm-down on top of it.

Shinji felt pressure against the palm of his left hand, like he was resting it on top of someone else's, and an entirely unfamiliar band of pressure around his ribcage.

Asuka felt pressure against the back and the palm of her right hand, like it was sandwiched between someone else's hand and something hard and flat.

Rei's inhuman senses showed her the transposed fragments of her fellow pilots' souls lighting up.

"This is weird," declared Asuka, flexing her right hand. "It's like I'm feeling what you're touching."

Shinji shifted slightly in his seat, and Asuka felt a bundle of sensation, mostly an uncomfortable pressure, that seemed to be coming from somewhere she didn't—

Facts connected in her brain, and with a cry of "pervert!" she slapped him with her right hand. The impact registered in her hand and her face simultaneously, making her flinch and breaking the sensory connection.

"Ow!" cried Shinji and Asuka in unison.

"What was that for?" added Shinji.

Asuka rubbed her cheek, despite the pain having vanished as soon as she stopped touching Shinji. "You were being a perv!"

"What do you mean?" interjected Rei, confused by the exchange.

Asuka and Shinji both went red, and Asuka managed to get some words out. "Look, I know what the pressure I felt means, OK?"

Rei put together the pieces of the situation in her head and nodded. She didn't entirely understand why it bothered Asuka, but it was good enough to work with. "I see. I'm sorry this upset you. It proves I was right about your status, though."

"So... there's part of my soul in Asuka, and part of hers in me?"

"Yes," replied Rei. "When you touch each other, you connect to the missing part and receive sensory impressions from it."

"I don't want part of Shinji in me!"

Shinji blinked at the outburst. Asuka stopped, looked at him, and fled the table with her cheeks blazing.

Misato looked over the front page of the report Lieutenant Ibuki had given her. The minimalist summary at the top was discouraging enough – "43% confidence" was a bad sign – but the longer summary was worse.

The man the MAGI were proposing as the shooter had been a sniper in the JGSDF who went AWOL four days before the shooting. He had no surviving family on record and had been raised in an orphanage before enlisting straight out of high school. Nothing unusual there – Japan's orphanages had been overloaded since Second Impact, and enlisting gave you better opportunities, both in service and after discharge, than waiting until you got conscripted.

His SDF disciplinary record, on the other hand, appeared to be complete bullshit; he should have been court-martialled and dishonorably discharged three times over, but he'd never received anything worse than a formal reprimand.

On top of that, he was the only survivor from his platoon following an ambush while doing COIN work in the Mekong Protectorate, yet he'd been passed fit for duty before being transferred to an undermanned platoon and rotated back to Japan. The closing line of the front page was an understatement. "Records associated with this suspect exhibit peculiarities consistent with deliberate tampering."

She looked up from the report to see Kaji standing in the doorway of her office. "Hello, you," she said.

"Good afternoon." He smiled sympathetically at her. "The look on your face says you don't like what you're reading."

"Those romances Ibuki reads make more sense than this shit."

"Sounds like something a dashing, handsome UN Inspector needs to investigate."

Some things never changed. Misato rolled her eyes and extended the report towards him. "Well, when you find one, hand him this."

He took the document off her hands and started reading the first page. After a few moments, he sighed and shook his head. "This is going to be a fun case. Are we still on for Saturday?"

"Why would I miss having fancy dinner at your expense? Of course."

"Glad to hear it." Kaji grinned. "See you later, Katsuragi."

"See you later, Kaji."

Misato wondered, as her idiot ex departed, just what she'd got herself into.

"Would you like to stay for dinner?"

Rei contemplated the invitation. On the one hand, spending more time in Shinji's company would be pleasant. On the other hand, she was not entirely comfortable with Asuka's company, and there was the question of how the Commander and Dr Akagi would react to her seeking to reinforce social bonds. "Does Asuka like vegetarian food?"

Shinji looked towards the redhead's room and sighed. "Probably not," he admitted. "And I've left it a little late to prepare two different mains."

"Then I should thank you for the invitation, but regretfully decline. It would be pleasant to dine with you another time." She reached into her school bag, pulled out the jar of chilli flakes, and shook it to settle the contents. "I need to buy more of these. I don't know how long my present state will persist."

The look on Shinji's face appeared to be one of alarm. "Is it healthy eating that much chilli?"

"Humans not used to it would suffer considerable discomfort throughout the alimentary canal." She smiled a little, in a manner she hoped was reassuring. "I do not anticipate experiencing any difficulty. Good night, Shinji. I will see you tomorrow."

Chapter Text

Wednesday morning at school found Rei watching her fellow pilots. Shinji was glancing occasionally at Asuka, and there was a visible tension in Asuka's posture as the redhead kept her eyes fixed on the blackboard. Whatever had happened after she left, Rei sensed that it had not been any kind of resolution.

She turned her thoughts to her own problems. There were advantages to her heightened awareness – after all, she wouldn't have been able to notice and investigate the interesting phenomenon that was Shinji and Asuka's connection without it – but it was very wearying, and her steady intake of capsaicin to distract from the wretched garments she was compelled to wear was... not ideal, for all that she had deflected Shinji's concerns the previous evening.

She couldn't approach Dr Akagi about the subject. She was unsure whether the scientist could be trusted to use anything but the most direct of methods, and she had no wish to return to the depths of her habitual daze.

She couldn't approach the Commander. Her mental state was outside his expertise. He might very well simply ask Dr Akagi to address the situation.

Captain Katsuragi was a possibility, but Shinji's occasional remarks about their superior raised questions over her suitability.

She opened the messaging application on her school laptop, and was immediately reminded why she didn't use it. The logs were littered with inane requests from other students. A few moments' work allowed an indiscriminate purge, and then she typed a message to Shinji. "May I sit with you and Asuka for lunch again? It was pleasant."

Shinji's response was disappointing. "Not sure she wants to sit with me. She wouldn't look at me at breakfast this morning. I can sit with you if you'd like."

"That would be pleasant. Do you mind if I ask Asuka? I think it would be better for us if we were able to interact with each other regularly."

"OK."

Asuka frowned at the message from Rei on her laptop. "Would you like to sit with me and Shinji for lunch today?"

Her cheeks flushed as she remembered the previous afternoon. The id— Shinji had started thinking pervy thoughts about her. She supposed it shouldn't really be a surprise. Boys were like that and she had an inkling he'd more or less never touched a girl apart from the time she was trying to not think about his memory of, so touching a girl who he could feel what she was touching probably would make him perv out over something.

There was the question of why she hadn't noticed anything like that when they held hands in the café, but they had both had bigger concerns than 'feeling a bit weird' at that point.

And she still had to share Misato's apartment with him, because Kaji was an arsehole and there was no way she was doing her own laundry if she could help it. Even if it meant a risk that maybe he was doing things with it.

No, she thought. He wasn't quite that kind of perv. With a sigh, she typed a reply to Rei. "All right, then." Sitting together as the three of them would probably help stop people getting the wrong idea about her and Shinji.

Something was amiss, Asuka realized, as she wolfed down her lunch. Sitting with Rei and Shinji, she could feel an odd, nagging sensation like... like something wasn't there when it should be, which was stupid. She definitely wasn't missing any body parts. She set down her chopsticks. Eating lunch with people in silence was too weird. "So, Rei, what kind of music do you listen to?"

The bluenette shrugged. "I don't."

Asuka blinked. "Who the hell doesn't listen to music? Apart from deaf people, I mean. Obviously they don't."

"I don't have any equipment to do so. It never felt necessary."

Who even raised her? "Well, we should do something about that, shouldn't we, Shinji?"

At the opposite corner of the table, Shinji looked up from his lunch. "Uh, sorry, I didn't catch that."

"I said we should find some music for Rei to listen to! Can you believe she doesn't listen to any? And we still need to go to a record shop anyway, because I need to replace what got sunk and you need to listen to something written after 1850!"

"I like Stravinsky. He was after 1850."

"Fine, after 1950, then! And it needs to be something with electric gui—" As she leaned across the table, her hand touched Shinji's, and she gave a yelp of surprise as she realized her sense of something missing was gone. She recoiled from the accidental contact, and the missingness returned.

"You are very passionate about this," observed Rei, as Asuka flopped back down into her seat.

"It's really important," replied Asuka in a voice much smaller than usual. I mustn't run away.

"All right," said Shinji. "Let's go record shopping. I guess Rei might need something to play things on as well. If we go at the weekend we'll have time to browse properly and sit down afterwards and listen to things."

Asuka nodded and returned her attention to her lunch. Food was good. Food didn't complicate her life.

Chapter Text

Down in the deepest parts of NERV HQ, with only the floor – and ten layers of armour – separating her from the "LCL Production Plant", Ritsuko tapped her fingers nervously on the workbench. Ayanami's behaviour was different, and the fact the girl was suspended in LCL behind an inch of armoured glass did very little to make that less worrying.

Gendou taking so long to answer her call wasn't helping. Come on, you bastard, pick up.

Click. "Doctor. Is something wrong?"

"Ayanami seemed agitated when she arrived for her backup. I'm not sure I've ever seen her undress that fast before outside of combat prep." She looked at the rack of drug cartridges next to the workstation. Formula three would be easiest, but six would probably yield the best results. A couple of buttons, a few squirts of carefully chosen chemicals into the suspension tank, and she could have her peace of mind back. "I can address the issue easily enough, but I knew you'd want to offer some input."

"I'm aware of a shift in her behaviour. If it causes a serious problem, it will be dealt with. Until then, do not interfere."

That wasn't the answer she wanted. She pressed the issue. "The MAGI estimate a 200% increase in the size of the backup delta compared to last week. It's not going to finish in the normal time window. That's going to cause a problem right there."

"Move the backup window to Saturday nights." Gendou's tone shifted subtly, even if his language remained professional. "I believe that would be a suitable time for a conference once the process is under way."

Ritsuko hesitated, grateful that this was a voice-only connection. Their last couple of... conferences had not been to her taste, in more ways than one. She couldn't help wondering if he'd changed his diet. "Of course, Commander."

"Very good. Cancel tonight's backup. Have Section Two return Ayanami to her accommodation." Click.

Ritsuko rubbed her upper arms as she looked towards the suspension cylinder. She could have done with a break before interacting with Ayanami again.

As the hot spray of the shower sent orange rivulets of diluted LCL streaming down the drain, Rei pondered the incidents of the evening.

Given how unpleasant cloth felt against her skin, she had been looking forward to the backup process, and the multiple hours of being suspended in LCL without even a plugsuit. To have it interrupted after less than an hour and be ordered to wash, dress, and report to Section Two's motor pool to be driven home was... displeasing.

Dr Akagi's behaviour towards her was different, too. Normally the scientist treated her with a certain disdain, like she regarded Rei as barely more than an animated object. This evening, though, there was anxiety and tension in Dr Akagi's movement and manner.

Rei wondered what inspired such a reaction. She could not imagine herself engaging in violence towards Dr Akagi. She had no motive to do so, and in any event the likely result would be the termination of her current body and the continuous sedation of its replacement.

She ran her fingers through her hair, separating her locks to allow the shower to loosen every last trace of LCL. Immersion was pleasant, but letting it dry and congeal was not.

"Ayanami!" shouted Dr Akagi from the doorway. "What's taking so long?"

Rei sighed and twisted this way and that under the shower one last time before turning off the water. "I wished to be particularly sure I had cleaned all the LCL out of my hair before getting in a Section Two vehicle. It would be inappropriate to contaminate the headrests."

She started towelling off. The rough cotton was no more pleasant against her skin than her school uniform, but the contact was brief, and entirely in her own control. She left her hair wetter than usual; if it was wet, it would cling to her instead of brushing against her neck.

Reluctantly re-dressed in her school uniform, Rei emerged from the bathroom and met Dr Akagi's gaze. "When is my next backup going to be?"

The scientist recoiled slightly and looked away. "Saturday. 18:00. Don't be late. The MAGI estimate it could take as much as 24 hours."

"Is Unit 02 ready for use? It would be unfortunate to leave Shin— Pilot Ikari as the only pilot capable of deployment."

"We'll be holding full sync tests for all three of you tomorrow afternoon. Now get upstairs. Section Two are waiting for you."

Arriving in class on Thursday morning, Asuka started at the sight of Rei. She'd replaced her usual scruffy bob with a much shorter – but equally scruffy, like she'd hacked it into being with nail scissors – style that left her face unframed and her ears exposed. After the class rep had run them through that pointlessly deferential stand-bow-sit routine, Asuka sent a message to the bluenette.

"What's with the lesbian hair?"

"I don't understand the question."

"Your new haircut. It's going to make people think you're into girls."

"As far as I know I am not 'into' any kind of human."

"If you say it like that people will wonder if you're some kind of freak who's into tentacle monsters or something."

"Humans are strange."

"You say that like you aren't one."

Rei stiffened in her seat. "Later. Bring Shinji."

"Hey, we're not joined at the hip, you know."

As Asuka sent that last rejoinder to Rei, the teacher cleared his throat. "Miss Souryuu, your kanji work could do with a great deal of improvement. Please pay attention to the lesson."

Asuka opened her mouth to protest, then thought better of it. He'll just have that Horaki girl march me to the office or something.

There was a final message from Rei on her laptop. "Indeed. You are joined at the soul."

Chapter Text

Sat at the back of the observation bay, Ritsuko ignored the hustle and bustle of technicians setting up the extra equipment to manage three live sync tests from one bay. After all, they knew their jobs and could do them perfectly well without her supervision. Her attention was instead focused on the window, and the blue-armoured giant in the test bay beyond it. How, she wondered, was that... thing going to react to the Commander's precious doll's current state of agitation?

Would it reject her? That would be convenient.

Would it fly into a rage and try to murder them all again? That would... not be convenient, even if the window had been given extra reinforcement and a catch net to block at least the larger pieces of glass.

Maybe everything would go smoothly and let Gendou smirk at her this Saturday during their 'conference' and tell her everything was going to the scenario. That would be annoying, but possibly for the best. Quite apart from the whole practical question of having three deployable pilots, if he was relaxed about the state of the scenario, he'd probably be more... considerate. And maybe even take some feedback on taste.

She pushed aside a treacherous and unhelpful thought about that, and fished her cigarettes out of her labcoat pocket. "Ibuki! I'm going for a smoke."

She had a cigarette between her lips by the time the door closed behind her. Alone in the hallway, she sparked up and took a long drag. As she blew the smoke ceilingward, the elevator door across the hall slid open and Misato stepped out.

"Ugh, Ritz, are you still smoking the same shitty cigarettes? At least Kaji managed to find a decent brand."

"If they tasted good I'd smoke more. How are your pilots?"

Misato shrugged. "Rei seems twitchy. Shinji and Asuka are... well, I told you before, Shinji's grown a sharp tongue, and Asuka's a little bit less... forceful than I'd expect. And they're probably both still a bit rattled from the shootings. The body they saw wasn't a pretty sight."

"Keep me posted. Anything that stands out could be important." Ritsuko glanced down at her cigarette. "Especially with that throwing a wrench into things."

Misato's eyes narrowed. "You know, you're not very good at sounding like you care."

"When was I ever good at..." Ritsuko paused, and remembered a certain weekend back in uni, just after Misato and Kaji had broken up. "Don't answer that."

"See you inside, Ritz," said Misato with a grin as she brushed past Ritsuko, the accidental contact giving that troublesome memory a signal boost.

She smoked the rest of her cigarette far faster than was sensible and headed back inside where there would be work to do, at least if the technicians were finished.

"Synchronization complete."

Asuka shifted uneasily in her seat. Something wasn't quite right. She was used to Unit 02's barely-contained rage seeping through the link, but today it felt different. Blurred. Confused. She toggled on her commlink. "So what's my score?"

"You're averaging fifty seven point three, Asuka," replied the voice of that nice friendly lieutenant – Ibuki, her name was. "There's some jitter on that, though. You're swinging by two percent either way."

Three percent down on my last test at NERV Berlin. "Huh. You sure that reading's correctly calibrated?"

"We're using the calibration curve that was sent over with you and Unit 02."

Oh, wonderful. She looked around the inside of the Evangelion cage, comparing it to its counterpart in Berlin. "Tell them to make sure they sent the latest curve. They sent me by sea without underwater gear, after all."

"I'll get that double-checked for you, Asuka."

The commlink fell silent, leaving Asuka sitting in an entry plug in an idle Evangelion with nothing to do.

"Synchronization complete."

Shinji's grip on the controls relaxed slightly. Everything was... off. The intangible warmth he was used to was a little cooler, a little harder to grasp. He reached up to his A10 connectors to check they were properly in place, but everything seemed to be in order. He toggled on his commlink. "This doesn't feel right. It should feel warmer."

"Hang on, Shinji, let me check the thermal readouts for the plug," replied Lieutenant Ibuki. "Does anything else feels unusual?"

"No, just that."

"OK." Ibuki paused, and Shinji heard a clatter of typing. "Thermal profile says the temperature in the entry plug is the same as usual. No hot or cold spots."

Shinji looked up, through Unit 01's gaze, at the empty observation box, and shook his head. "I'm not talking about that kind of warmth," he said. "When I sync with the Eva, it feels warm inside. Like..." He trailed off, unable to find the words to express it.

"Well, your sync score is lower than last time. You're on 51%." More typing. "You and Asuka are both showing some jitter on your score – about 2% either way."

Dr Akagi joined in the conversation. "Hello, Shinji. We'll have to look more closely at these results, but for the moment, there's no major concern. You should be fine to pilot in the field if an Angel attacks – just be mindful of the jitter. We might need to run a field exercise with you and Asuka."

"There's no 'might' about it, Ritz."

The voice in Ritsuko's ear was friendly enough, but the remark reminded her that all was still not entirely well between herself and Misato. She nodded. "Of course. When should we run it?"

"Sunday."

"Possible. Let's see Ayanami's results first. Maya, do the honours."

"Synchronization complete."

Rei looked around the cage. This was not how a sync test should feel. Sync tests were supposed to happen in her baseline neurological state. All of her results had been taken in that state. As long as her sync ratio in that state was adequate, she would be certain of being able to operate Unit 00.

"Congratulations, Rei! Your score is up five points from your last sync test. You're almost level with Asuka. Whatever you're doing, keep it up."

Rei paused. She wished to dispel Lieutenant Ibuki's impression that her sync rate improvement was the result of something she had done, but she did not wish to draw Dr Akagi's attention to the anomaly. Her continued heightened awareness was a difficult burden to bear, but any intervention would be... blunt.

"Thank you, Lieutenant. I shall do my best." An idea occurred to her. Sitting in the entry plug, wearing her plugsuit and immersed in LCL, was a much more pleasant condition than any practically maintainable condition she could reach in her living quarters. "Would you like to get an extended data set?"

Ritsuko wanted the data in front of her to go away. Ayanami's sync rate was stable, and higher than normal for a sync test. Gendou's decision to leave her be would stand up to scrutiny. "Excellent work," she said, trying not to sound like she was gritting her teeth. "Let's get a few more minutes of background data before shutdown."

"So, Ritz, are we good for Sunday?"

Ritsuko looked at her old friend and nodded. "I suppose. Ayanami and I will be unavailable due to an essential procedure, but I believe Lieutenant Ibuki can handle the Project E side of the exercise."

"I can live with that. What kind of 'essential procedure' are we talking about?"

Ritsuko recalled the 'conference' following the last time she'd given Misato more information than Gendou thought was strictly necessary where the surveillance systems were online, and barely suppressed a shudder. "That information's only available at the Commander's discretion. If you don't feel like asking him, you'll just have to trust me."

"Right." Misato paused. "Everything OK, Ritz?"

"As good as can be expected given the threats we face."

If she said it enough, maybe she'd believe it herself.

Chapter Text

Rei felt an unfamiliar, and distinctly unpleasant, emotion as she settled into a chair at Captain Katsuragi's dining table. It seemed to rise from an awareness that Shinji and Asuka's living arrangements – however much Asuka, in particular, might display discontent with them – were clearly 'better' than her own in several ways.

The fabric of the apartment was sound, with no visible damage to the walls. The windows were double glazed and free of cracks. The refrigerator was quiet. The right rear element on the hob did not trip the circuit breaker after a minute's use. The water from the kitchen tap ran clear immediately. Visiting such a residence, a pleasant enough experience in itself, was leading her to make comparisons, and she did not like the results.

"So, Rei. What did you want to talk to us about?" asked Asuka.

Rei looked at Asuka, then at Shinji. "When we were talking about my haircut and how it might be interpreted, you made a remark about how my choice of words might make people think I'm not human."

"I remember that," affirmed Asuka. "I wasn't being serious, really."

Rei weighed her words carefully. If she disclosed the wrong facts, it was likely that a great deal of disruption would ensue. On the other hand, she needed to disclose enough to secure the trust of her comrades in arms. "The fact that I am... not human in the strictest sense of the word is not for public consumption. I should not do things that encourage speculation in that direction."

"The Commander enrolled you in school without making you wear cosmetic lenses, right?" asked Asuka.

"Yes."

"And you change for PE in front of the other girls?"

"Yes."

"You're a red-eyed natural bluenette with no bellybutton. Someone's going to have noticed." Asuka gave Shinji a sidelong glance. "Certainly this per— I mean, Shinji has."

Shinji looked confused for a moment, then blushed furiously . "I didn't— I mean, I was trying not to look! I didn't mean to..."

Rei pondered the implications. It was hard to reconcile the Commander's far-ranging insistence on secrecy with such an oversight. "Thank you for pointing this out to me." She tapped her fingers on the table. Properly, she should tell the Commander about Asuka's observation, but the likely outcomes were undesirable. If he felt the leak was a problem, he would withdraw her from school, and then her only contact with the other pilots would be at official NERV activities, drastically reducing her opportunity to observe their souls. If he did not, then raising it with him would be a waste of his time and hers.

"So," said Asuka, "I guess I have to ask, if you're not human, what are you? Some kind of alien or something?"

"I was created as part of the Evangelion project." Careful words. Factual words. Words that did not betray secrets it would be dangerous to reveal. "My creators hoped to avoid the need for a human pilot. They did not succeed. They could create as many bodies as they wished, but they could not give them all souls. There are many of this body, but only one can act at a time."

"Where did your soul come from, then?" asked Shinji.

Rei froze, not even blinking, as she realized she had misstepped.

Asuka's hand waved in front of her face. "Earth to Rei, Earth to Rei. Come in Rei Ayanami."

Rei closed her eyes and shook her head. She needed to provide enough of a fact. "An experimental process." Everything was an experiment. "It turned out to not be repeatable, despite their best efforts." There. That should suffice.

Shinji frowned a little, then shrugged. "I... well, I have no idea how difficult it was. I guess that makes sense."

Asuka raised an eyebrow, but said nothing.

Silence hung over the table, only to be pierced by the sound of the front door and Captain Katsuragi's call of "I'm home!"

"Welcome home!" called Shinji.

"Huh. When did that workaholic last get home before dinner?" asked Asuka.

"Ayanami dined with Katsuragi and the other pilots today," observed Fuyutsuki. "She was late home."

Gendou nodded, his hand hovering over the shougi board. "Did Section Two note any other discrepancies?"

"She remarked on one of the agents' smell."

The pieces clicked against the board as Gendou made his move. "Nothing to be concerned about, then. We already know she is more alert to her surroundings now."

"The agent smelled of marijuana, though of course she didn't recognize it." Fuyutsuki looked at the board, and dropped a knight. "Unprofessional."

Gendou sighed as he saw the checkmate. It was a rarer sight than it used to be. "I lose, sensei."

Chapter Text

Chewing chilli flakes as she dressed for school that Saturday morning, Rei came to an inconvenient realization: her body was starting to get used to her attempts at self-distraction by capsaicin exposure, and she was going to need a new strategy. Picking up her school bag, she focused on what the day held in store.

School itself would be just another spell of pointless tedium, offering her knowledge that she would never need. Only the fact that Shinji and Asuka, and their fascinating souls, would be there offered any prospect of mental stimulus.

The evening would be a pleasant void, floating in a tank of LCL in Terminal Dogma while her latest memories were recorded by the MAGI. It held no interest, but at least she would be free of all the aggravating stimuli of daily life for the duration.

The afternoon held dread and excitement in equal measure. On the one hand, Saturday afternoon in Tokyo-3's shopping district would be full of noise and confusion. On the other, she would be able to watch the interaction between Shinji and Asuka, and they would be introducing her to the world of music.

She wondered if they would touch each other. Their souls were at their most interesting when that happened, as the transferred fragments lit up from the connection to their origin.

On her way out, she frowned at her front door with its broken lock that had allowed Shinji's intrusion into her apartment. It left a new doubt lingering in her mind as she headed downstairs. The Commander undoubtedly prized her safety – his response to the activation accident told her that – yet nobody had thought to repair the lock on her living quarters. It was another troubling oversight to add to the one Asuka had brought to her attention.

Shinji frowned at the sign above the shop Asuka was pointing to. The bizarrely angular style of the red-on-black writing, embedded in a tangle of meaningless lines, made it nearly impossible to read, but he thought it might say "KHAOS NOIZ" in romaji. The rest of the storefront wasn't any more reassuring. The front door was painted black, and the window displays (with black backdrops) either side of it featured mannequins in outlandish outfits, posed with battered-looking electric guitars. "Asuka, is that really the right place?"

She glared at him. "Look at it!" she snapped. She'd been short-tempered all day. Misato had even said something about "back to your old self, eh?" at breakfast.

"Okay, okay, I guess we should go in."

"Damn right. Let's get some decent music!" Asuka forged ahead, Rei following close behind. Shinji brought up the rear, not quite knowing what to expect.

The interior upheld the black-and-red scheme of the shopfront, and Shinji felt profoundly out of place as he saw the handful of other customers, mostly older than himself and dressed in black with outlandishly styled hair. A new song had just started playing from the ceiling speakers, a woman chanting wordlessly over some sort of background noise.

The English lyrics, when they began, seemed confusing and disjointed, but the texture of the sounds alone was enough to send an uncanny chill down his spine. He looked over at Rei, and saw her staring intently at the speakers, tapping her fingers lightly against her thigh in time to whatever structure might be found.

"Hey Shinji, stop lollygagging and get over here," called Asuka. As Shinji headed towards her, she added, "You too, Rei."

Rei's hand came to a rest as she blinked and shook her head. "Do you know this song?" she asked as she joined Shinji and Asuka.

Asuka pulled a face and clapped a hand to her belly. "Ugh, no. And I could do without those fucking lyrics right now."

"Oh. Why? They are intriguing," said Rei, starting to tap her leg again.

Asuka glared at Rei. "You... you really don't know, do you?" she said, before muttering in a low voice, "Lucky bitch."

Rei seemed not to notice the insult, but Shinji did. "What was that for?" he asked.

Asuka gave him the same glare, then stepped away to put Rei between them. "Ask me later and I'll help you understand. I don't want to get thrown out for causing a scene."

Shinji looked back at her and nodded. "Fine."

Rei had very little to pay attention to, floating in the tank. The petty discomforts of daily life were far away, the flotation medium obscured her vision, and the layers of armoured glass shut out all sound beyond the gentle whirr of the recirculator pumps.

Very little, though, was not nothing. She could sense Dr Akagi's soul. She could sense Commander Ikari's soul arriving.

She could sense the dim scrap of some other soul that was attached to his.

That was new, and troubling. She had faith that it was part of the Scenario, but it seemed a strange choice to have made.

"So, you said you were going to 'help me understand'?" asked Shinji as he put away the last of the washing up.

Asuka looked up from the sofa. "Yes. How much of the lyrics did you understand?"

"Not much? Something about jagged glass and stars and angels? English isn't my best subject."

"Right." She got up and walked back towards him. "Give me your hand, and don't pull away."

He extended his hand nervously. Her choice of words was worrying, but he wanted to not be confused.

She grabbed his wrist, rather harder than he'd have liked, but his attempt to complain turned into a yelp of pain as he started to feel what she was feeling. The tenderness across his... no, her chest. The raw, tense, knotted pain in her abdomen. He tried to pull away, but with her grip so tight on his wrist he only succeeded in pulling her closer, nearly overbalancing them both before she let go and stepped back.

A faint ghost of her pain lingered for a few moments as he caught his breath. "That hurt," he muttered.

"That's what that song was about. Mostly. I think. Maybe about wanting to end the world because of it, too."

"Shouldn't you see a doctor or something?"

Asuka snorted and rolled her eyes. "Already did. 'Just part of becoming a woman,' she said. 'Just take some painkillers and carry on, it's only a few days a month.' Stupid stoic bullshit. She doesn't have to pilot Eva like this."

The taste that lingered in Ritsuko's mouth, despite gargling and brushing her teeth, was much less unpleasant than after her last 'conference' with Gendou. It still made her wonder what he'd been eating, but it was just a matter of scientific curiosity, rather than a desire to not taste him after he'd eaten it.

She walked into her office and saw Lieutenant Ibuki staring intently at whatever report she was working on. There was something endearing about the younger woman's enthusiasm. Aoba and Hyuuga would never stay up this late working on a Saturday, short of a direct order.

"Ibuki?" she called.

Ibuki jolted in her seat and turned towards Ritsuko. "Sempai?" Ibuki frowned. "Are you all right, sempai? Did some— Did something happen?"

Ritsuko blinked, taking a moment to process Ibuki's concern. Oh. Right. I didn't brush my hair, my lipstick is a mess, and I'm not smiling about it. Rumour control time. "Nothing I said 'no' to, Lieutenant. No need to worry. Go home and get some sleep. Those numbers will keep until morning, whatever they are."

"R-right!" Ibuki locked the terminal and stood up. "Thank you, sempai. If you need it, I know a... service. They helped a friend of mine."

"I told you, it was nothing I said 'no' to. But thank you for your concern. Sleep well, Ibuki."

Chapter Text

This was stupid, Misato told herself.

She was eating yakiniku with the man she'd fucked six ways to Sunday at university.

She was drinking fancy beers with the man she'd broken up with by answering machine.

She was gazing into the eyes of the man who was supposed to be investigating anyone and everyone at Tokyo-3, herself included.

The only way it could get any stupider was if she actually made a pass at him instead of just pressing her foot against his leg under the table.

He didn't even look like he'd noticed that part.

She grabbed her beer glass and necked the last third of it. It was good. Too good. She drank a premium brand at home, but this was better.

Stronger, too. Belgian import.

"Are you going to eat that?"

She looked down at her last piece of yakiniku. She picked it up in her chopsticks, and fought down the stupid impulse that resulted. "Yes," she said, and popped it in her mouth.

"I'll settle up." He tilted his head. "And I'll get you a cab."

Bastard. "Just me?" she pressed.

He leaned across the table. "I have a lead to follow up in the morning," he said in an almost-whisper before standing up. "I can come as far as your front door."

She steadied herself against the table as she stood up. "Next time, then?"

He grinned.

With the rice cooker loaded for breakfast, Shinji looked back over his shoulder at the sound of door rollers. Misato emerged into the living room a few moments later, looking less hungover than he'd come to expect on Sunday mornings.

No happier, though.

"Good morning, Misato!" he called. "How was your date?"

She made a beeline, not for the beer fridge as he expected, but for the cupboard with the glasses in it. "Kaji slept in his bed and I slept in mine," she replied, filling a glass from the tap. She chugged the contents almost as fast as a can of beer, a trickle of water escaping the corner of her mouth. "How was your evening? You two behave yourselves?"

"The furniture is in one piece and there are no new burn marks," replied Shinji. He considered asking why she was opening the day with water, but thought better of it. Anything that involved her drinking less beer couldn't be all bad. "Excuse me, Misato, I need to get at the eggs."

Misato stepped out of his way. "Omelettes for breakfast? Or are you going to try your hand at okonomiyaki?"

"I'm not from Osaka."

Asuka emerged from the bathroom in casual clothes, one hand resting on her middle. "Hey Shinji, do we have any painkillers?"

Shinji smiled sympathetically. After last night, he knew exactly how she felt. "There's some ibuprofen in the cabinet. Top shelf."

"There's three sets of pills up there." She looked like she'd wanted to slip an extra word in there. "You know I can't read the squiggles half the time."

"Red and white packet," said Misato. "What's up, Asuka?"

"What do you think?" Asuka snapped back as she vanished back into the bathroom.

Misato set down her empty glass. "What's that about?" she asked Shinji.

He thought back to last night, raised an eyebrow, and echoed Asuka's response. "What do you think?"

Misato looked at him oddly, then shook her head. "Right, right, I get it. Tell her there's a hot water bottle in the closet in her room. And if you want to really make her day, go buy her some good chocolate."

Next time on Defence in Depth: Kaji meets a contact. Rei returns home and ponders her listening material. A new school week begins.

Chapter Text

Walking through a real military base, full of clean-shaven men in fatigues with short hair glaring at him, was not Kaji's idea of a good Sunday morning. On the other hand, there was no way he was going to get to the bottom of the bullshit on that one guy's personnel record without talking to someone.

Walking into the base offices, he showed his UN ID to the sergeant on the front desk. "Ryōji Kaji, United Nations Special Inspectorate," he announced. "I'm here to see Colonel Hasegawa."

The sergeant looked Kaji over, frowned at his ID card, and nodded. "He's waiting for you."

After the third pat-down of the morning and some shenanigans with the security gate, Kaji was ushered into the colonel's office.

"Good morning, Inspector," said Hasegawa. "I understand you want to talk about one of my men."

"Yes, Colonel," replied Kaji, passing his folder across the desk. "We obtained his personnel records, but they appear to be... less than entirely accurate. I'm sure you had nothing to do with the inaccuracies, but you might have some insight into the man."

Hasegawa flipped open the folder and started leafing through it, his expression shifting slowly from 'unimpressed', through 'incredulous', to 'downright thunderous'. "Well! NERV's ridiculous computers dug this claptrap up, I presume?"

"Yes, Colonel."

"Thank you for bringing it to my attention, and I do remember this man. Signing a sole survivor's psychiatric discharge always sticks in the mind, Inspector. What's your interest in him?"

"His name came up in connection with the sniper incident. The Tokyo-3 garrison regiment used a missile to get rid of the sniper, so there's not much to go on."

"Nakajima was always fond of that approach. Cost him fewer men than trying to countersnipe, he said." Hasegawa looked down at the folder. "Sadly, after his discharge, I couldn't tell you anything about this man. Probably wound up sleeping rough."

Kaji took pains to not let his disappointment show. "That's useful in itself. Thank you for your time, Colonel."

"You're welcome." Hasegawa handed the folder back to him. "Here. Take your spy thriller away with you."

"Of course." Kaji collected the folder and offered Hasegawa a card with a secure phone number on it. "If something happens to catch your attention, this number might be useful."

Standing down in Terminal Dogma, Ritsuko looked over the results on the MAGI terminal. The backup, large though it was, was complete. Ayanami's vital signs were stable. Her last sync score was entirely satisfactory. There was no reason to intervene and adjust her biochemistry. The Commander would not approve of her doing so.

It still took an act of will for her to not drug the hybrid girl to the gills. She keyed in the release sequence for the tank and watched as the flotation medium drained away and the armoured glass retracted into the floor.

Ayanami looked her way briefly before heading towards the changing room. It wasn't the strangely impassive look that should have been there. It was focused, alert, even insightful. Maybe that was a sign that she should do something. But... no. The moment was gone. The hyposprays were too drastic and there was no reason for her to put Ayanami back in the tank. She turned her attention back to reviewing the data.

She was still immersed in cardiograms and biomarker listings when the sound of shoes on metal announced Ayanami's return from the changing room. "Dr Akagi, I am ready to return home."

"Fine. Let me show you out." Ritsuko stood up and walked Ayanami to the elevator.

Rei walked into her apartment and locked the door behind her. She walked over to the dresser and pressed 'play' on the CD player lying there, starting up one of the discs Shinji had suggested for her.

The music playing over the speakers was soft at first, slowly building into layers of dissonance and irregular rhythm. It was not pleasant, but there was something compelling about it, something that demanded movement despite the difficulty of the rhythm.

In the quieter, less compelling moments, she found time to slip the booklet out of the CD case and read it in bits and pieces. She read of a near riot at the first performance and ferocious arguments about the work's merit; she read also of the narrative depicted in the ballet, revolving around the rituals of an ancient people, and the choosing of a girl to dance herself to death before her elders.

She paused the disc then, and set aside her clothes. Her hope that loudness might serve the same purpose as the chemical heat of capsaicin had proven unfounded, and the fact of cloth was even more annoying when perspiration became a factor.

There had to be a solution. Perhaps the technology of plugsuits could be adapted to civilian clothing. Dr Akagi would not care, but perhaps she could ask the Commander to arrange something.

Monday came, and once more Asuka found herself zoning out as Nebukawa-sensei droned on about some petty detail of the pre-Impact world. Unable to concentrate on the teacher and the squiggles filling the blackboard, she turned her gaze towards Shinji.

It was annoying, really. She shouldn't be thinking about him this much. She wouldn't be thinking about him this much if she hadn't had to pilot with him inside her Entry Plug. She couldn't get those bits of his memory out of her brain.

Sharing an apartment with him just made it worse. He could cook the best out of the three of them. He could keep the place tidy even with a drunken slob like Misato living in it. He did everyone's laundry and yet she still hadn't had a single pair of knickers go missing. When she inflicted her uterus on him on Saturday night, he'd sucked it up... and gone out after breakfast on Sunday to buy her chocolate and more painkillers.

He liked good music. He'd taken to Rammstein quite quickly, and that Russian classical CD he'd put on was better than she expected. Very thunderous, very passionate.

He looked good in a plugsuit. He'd look good in normal clothes if he had any sense of style at all. Maybe she'd have to try doing something about that.

"Miss Sōryū."

No. No, she was not going to help Shinji look better. Why would she do that? He wasn't her boyfriend. They hadn't even been on a date. She'd paid for her own drink at the café. He was just her housemate.

"Miss Sōryū," repeated the old fossil at the front of the class, finally breaking her train of thought.

"Yes?" she asked.

"I understand you were raised in Germany. I'm sure your school curriculum covered how Second Impact changed people's lives. Perhaps you could share a few examples with us."

"Our modern history classes focused on the 1930s and 1940s," she replied, not bothering to stand up. "In Germany we think it's important to remember our country's sins as well as its glories."

There was a silence in Classroom 2-A around the space of half a minute, and some of the looks sent her way felt less than friendly.

"I see," said the teacher, when no more words were forthcoming. "Very well, Miss Sōryū. Now, as I was saying regarding the railway system following Second Impact..."

Next time on Defence in Depth: An Angel comes to Tokyo-3. The power of music is demonstrated.

Chapter Text

"The SDF have one of their destroyers shadowing something big and slow approaching the Kii Peninsula. They can't get a decent visual, but they're confident it's not a whale."

"Thank you, Aoba." Misato looked up at the map on screen. It had to be an Angel, really, even if it hadn't set off the alarms yet. "Have we got any readings from it?"

"The MAGI are still—"

The alarm started blaring.

AT FIELD DETECTED
PATTERN TYPE BLUE
ANGEL CONFIRMED
DESIGNATION: ISRAFEL

In Classroom 2-A, three young people reacted to the sound of their phones going off in unison.

Shinji sighed heavily, steeling himself for the prospect of another life or death struggle. For all that, he felt a certain thrill that had to come from the parts of Asuka's soul he was carrying. He gathered his things and hurried out the door without glancing back.

Asuka grinned as she saw the alert text on her phone. She'd finally get a chance to show off what Unit 02 could do when it wasn't stuck underwater with standard equipment. She'd just finished gathering her things when she glanced over at Shinji and remembered the pain he'd felt in his chest. He'd nearly died the first time he was launched against the blue crystal Angel. They'd actually needed to use the shock electrodes built into the chest of his suit. Gritting her teeth and silently cursing, she did her best to look confident as she headed for the door.

Across the classroom, by the window, Rei dug her nails into her palms and took slow deep breaths. Everything was the sharpest it had ever been, from the aftertaste of her toothpaste, through the slowly diffusing scents of her classmates' deodorants and suchlike, to the already hateful texture of her clothing. The only hope, if any was to be found, lay in defeating the Angel. Perhaps that would persuade her brain that the threat was gone for now, that she could sink back into the comforting fog of her daily routine.

She needed guidance. Dr Akagi would just use the drugs she had in ample supply. The Commander might even decide she needed to be transferred into a fresh body and reconditioned from the beginning.

Disappointed in herself, she gathered her things and hurried after her comrades in arms.

"Because the repairs following Operation Yashima are still in progress, we have agreed with the SDF to intercept this new Angel, designated 'Israfel', in an unpopulated area. Captain Katsuragi, please brief your pilots on the details of the operation."

Rei turned her attention from the Sub-Commander to the Captain.

"Right. The MAGI recommends a two-Eva team to engage this Angel. Mostly because we only have two of the airdrop transporters available. Rei will remain in reserve at Tokyo-3. Shinji and Asuka, you will..."

Rei bit the inside of her cheek. The pain and the taste of blood distracted her from Captain Katsuragi's description of an operation she would not be participating in and the scent of Sub-Commander Fuyutsuki's cologne and Asuka's strawberry shampoo. She was not being deployed. Her current state might persist even longer. Would it escalate further if another Angel encounter saw her sidelined yet again?

She bit the inside of her other cheek. Eating would likely be unpleasant for several days. Perhaps that would be useful.

A hand on her shoulder, shaking her lightly, broke her train of thought. "Earth to Rei!" called Asuka. "Are you okay there?"

Rei blinked and shook her head. "I was thinking about my role in this encounter."

"Relax, you get to stay at home with your crappy prototype," said Asuka.

Rei felt like she should protest Asuka's description of Unit 00, but she couldn't think of a reason to actually do so. Objectively, Unit 00 was inferior as an anti-Angel weapon to either of the other units. "I was hoping to be useful."

"Well, you know what they say. 'They also serve, who stand at home and wait.' Garrison duty sucks, but somebody's gotta do it."

Rei tried to dig her nails into her palms, but was blocked by the gloves of her plugsuit. Asuka did not understand. That was reasonable, because she did not know, but it was still frustrating. "I... you are right."

"Hey, Shinji."

Shinji stopped a couple of paces past the door to Unit 02's cage and turned around. Asuka was lingering at the door, one hand on the frame and the other held out towards him. "Asuka?"

"Come back here a moment."

Quirking an eyebrow suspiciously, he walked over to her. "What is it?"

She leaned in and whispered to him. "I have a theory. About that. And plugsuits." More loudly, she commanded, "Shake my hand."

He wasn't sure why he hesitated. They were both wearing gloves. It wouldn't do anything. It wouldn't affect the way being so close to her made him so very aware that something was missing. He took a deep breath and took her hand in his.

It was like touching bare-handed. He could feel the doorframe, hard in the grip of her other hand. He could feel the way her plugsuit fit her, including the places where it was very different to how his fit him. He tried not to think about that. They had a mission to accomplish, an Angel to kill. He shook her hand as firmly as he could manage. "Deal," he announced for the benefit of the other as if she'd suggested a bet or something.

She blinked. "Right. Deal." She pulled her hand away. "Now go get in the fucking robot."

Asuka couldn't fault the principle of the modified entry plug, but she didn't have to like it. The gimbal rings keeping her seat upright regardless of Unit 02's attitude were ugly and interfered with her field of view, and the inconsistency between the Eva's sense of balance and her own left her one step short of dizzy.

She wondered how Shinji was dealing with it. He hadn't had proper centrifuge training, after all. She guessed, from the lack of panicked voices on the commlink, that it hadn't made him spew, but would he still be effective? It would be a real mess if he started flopping around on the battlefield because he couldn't tell which way was 'up' any more.

"Two minutes to drop point," called Lt Ibuki. "Ground umbilical stations are primed for use."

The transporter started to dive, tipping Unit 02 head-down, and Asuka reflexively tightened her grip on the controls. There she was, worrying about the— about Shinji's ability to cope, when she wasn't a hundred percent sure about her own. To take her mind off it, she thumbed the talk button. "Hey Shinji, remember our deal. If I get the kill you have to cook me a proper German dinner."

Was it going to work?

"I remember. And if I get the kill, you have to actually try my fish soup."

Not quite the result she wanted. But she couldn't get into an argument about it. "Oh yeah, I am not letting you feed me that. I am going to kill this bastard."

The way Rei sat on the gantry railing next to her entry plug was not comfortable. It required constant fine shifts in muscle tension to remain stable. It made her tendons ache.

It wasn't enough, but it made things better. With her eyes closed, and her cheeks aching from their earlier biting, and her body encased in the smooth, compressive comfort of a plugsuit, the only things truly left outside her control were the smells and sounds of Unit 00's cage.

She wondered how Shinji and Asuka were doing.

Shinji sighed with relief as the battery countdown that had started when Unit 01 detached from the transporter disappeared. "Power attached," he confirmed over the commlink.

"Power attached," echoed Asuka. "So where's the Angel?"

"Making landfall right about now," replied Misato.

The water in the bay parted, and a black and white bipedal figure slowly emerged. It reminded him a little of the first Angel he'd fought, with no head or neck, and white ribs visible near an exposed core, but its limbs were much thicker and the face was a red and blue taikyokuzu instead of that odd bird skull. He raised the pallet rifle, aiming at the core, and concentrated on extending Unit 01's AT Field, remembering how the whip-Angel had ignored the gunfire when he forgot.

"All right," called Asuka. "Let's kick this thing's arse and go home."

Shinji made contact with the Angel's AT Field. It felt... odd. Almost like it wasn't quite... there. Still, it seemed to weaken as he probed, so he let off a short burst from the pallet rifle. Asuka lunged in a moment later, whirling her massive Eva-scale naginata round in a downward stroke that split the angel from the shoulder all the way down to the middle of its core.

"AT Field surge detected!" called Lt Ibuki as Asuka tugged at her weapon to pull it free.

"What?!" asked Asuka, overbalancing to land flat on her back as the Angel ripped the rest of the way in half.

The two halves pirouetted away, spinning at ridiculous speed, and when they came to a halt, Shinji thought he was seeing double. There were two of the Angel now, one silver and the other copper, each with half of the original's face.

To be continued shortly in "Bifurcation II", expected date 19 JUL 2021.

Chapter Text

Standing in the locker room, senses still keyed up to an unbearable level, Rei hesitated with her finger on the detensioning stud. Her plugsuit was specialist equipment. It was designed as a synchronization aid. It was not intended to be worn for any purpose other than Evangelion operations and training. It was not suitable for everyday wear. She could not go home in it. She could not sleep in it.

She shook her head and pressed the stud. Such thoughts were futile. The Angel was suppressed. There would be no combat engagement for several days. She had to change back into her school uniform and go home. Refusing to do so would simply make Dr Akagi insist that she needed to be taken down to Terminal Dogma for examination.

She would be content enough when she re-emerged the next day, or maybe the day after. Her behaviour would be as expected. Her senses would operate in their usual envelope. She would not have to grit her teeth as she pulled on garments made of everyday textiles. She would not feel nauseous breathing the tobacco-scented air around Dr Akagi. She would not object to how each of her shoes was ever so slightly the wrong fit in different ways. She would not be distracted by the way Shinji and Asuka's souls behaved.

Dressed in accordance with expectations, she regretfully dropped her plugsuit into the cleaning chute. The one small mercy, as she walked out of the locker room amid a storm of unwanted sensation, was that her crudely hacked-off hair was still short enough not to brush against her neck. She was not going to be able to sleep like this. Sheets in contact with her whole body would be insufferable. She needed something to—

Her gaze lit on a wall-mounted emergency medical kit. Her conditioning was tuned to respond, at least in part, to the hormonal markers of combat. A spike of exogenous epinephrine might serve a similar purpose, but breaking open the inspection seal on the fixed kit would raise questions.

She smelled someone over the cleaning products used to maintain the corridor. She was unsure who, except to exclude Dr Akagi because there was no stink of stale tobacco smoke.

"Rei?" asked Captain Katsuragi, coming round the corner. "I was just coming down to see how you were."

"I am well enough." Rei paused. Shinji had described the Captain as a caring person, if not always... good at it. She could endure a delay to avoid the attention she did not want. "Captain, I need some standard medication and I do not wish to disrupt Dr Akagi's analysis of the Angel. Could you get me an epinephrine autoinjector?"

"An EpiPen? I didn't know you were allergic to anything," replied the Captain. "But sure, I can get you that from Medical."

"Thank you. Please... do not mention it is for me."

"Rei?"

"Any requisition associated with me is notified to Dr Akagi. It would distract her when her full attention should be on finding a solution to dealing with the Angel. It is very important to me that I not distract her."

Shinji hesitated as he walked into the briefing room. Misato, Dr Akagi, and the three bridge crew were all sitting in the audience seats, leaving the seat next to Asuka as the only one vacant.

It wasn't that he didn't like her. It wasn't that he didn't want to sit near her. He just didn't want to accidentally brush her hand or anything and share the residual sympathetic pain in his left side with her, or find out the hard way that she had the same kind of problem. But he couldn't really make a thing of it because he didn't want to land himself any extra prodding and poking by Dr Akagi "in the name of science".

So he sat down next to Asuka and clasped his hands together in his lap. She looked up from her notebook at him, frowning slightly. "Hi," she said.

"Hi," he replied.

Any further conversation was curtailed by the lights dimming and Sub-Commander Fuyutsuki walking into the room. "Good evening," said Fuyutsuki, as a slide showing the identically charred figures of the Angel's duplicates appeared on the screen behind him. "We are here to review the unsuccessful engagement with the Angel called Israfel."

Shinji braced himself.

"Let me begin by saying that this incident demonstrates why it is not enough simply to have the right weapons to defeat the Angels. They must be used correctly."

The slide advanced to show a still image captured halfway through the Angel dividing. Shinji heard Asuka give a sharp intake of breath, but she didn't say anything.

"Unit 02's blow at the start of the engagement should have been decisive, but as we have now learned, 'should' means nothing when the Angels are involved. Instead, the Angel split into two copies of itself, which the MAGI system has called 'Banach' and 'Tarski', and began to actively engage the Evangelions."

A new slide showed Asuka and Shinji attacking the coppery duplicate. "The Pilots demonstrated an awareness of their tactical situation, and an ability to focus their attacks on a single target when presented with multiple. Unfortunately, despite landing multiple blows on duplicate Tarski, including strikes causing visible fractures of the core, they were unable to inflict any lasting damage."

Unit 02 – or at least, its legs, poking out from under a rockslide – appeared on screen. "The duplicates made a combined attack on Unit 02, seizing it and throwing it into a nearby hillside. The impact destabilized the terrain, leaving Unit 02 incapacitated."

Unit 02 was replaced by Unit 01, lying face down with a severed power cable. "Pilot Ikari offered a valiant resistance, but was unable to harm the duplicates or prevent them from destroying Unit 01's power cable. The SDF launched an N2 missile at NERV's request, causing extensive damage to both duplicates. Dr Akagi, I believe you have some input."

"Yes." The blonde-haired scientist walked to the front of the room – a little more awkwardly than usual, Shinji couldn't help noticing – and took Fuyutsuki's place at the lectern. "Any part of either duplicate where the other took no damage recovered almost instantly. The parts where both duplicates took damage from the blast remained injured. Our best forecast indicates the Angel will take a week to recover to combat readiness."

A new slide appeared, showing two horizontal lines with identically spaced marks on them. "The MAGI's analysis notes that while the duplicates moved independently, their attacks – whether on the same or different targets – were always very closely synchronized. The detailed AT Field analysis is ongoing, but we have a proposed plan of attack. Pilots Sōryū and Ikari will need to synchronize their movements so that they score blows against the duplicates as close to simultaneously as possible."

Shinji looked at Asuka. She looked like she wanted to say something – probably something rude – but obviously thought better of it. He allowed himself to smile a little... just as she turned towards him and frowned.

Before any words could be exchanged, Misato stood up, her chair scraping against the floor. "I have a training plan to help with that before we put them in the simulator again," she announced. "Kaji's getting the equipment delivered as we speak."

Asuka frowned as she, Shinji, and Misato approached the apartment building. There was an unmarked white box van parked outside, with two men in long-sleeved turtlenecks and gloves busy closing up the back. "Who even dresses like that in this heat?" she asked, plucking at her school blouse.

"Good question," replied Misato, just as Kaji emerged from the building. He grinned at the trio and waved, then turned to shake the hands of the delivery men. For a moment, Asuka thought she saw a flash of colour at the wrist of one of the men where his glove didn't quite overlap his sleeve.

The van drove off, and Misato walked over to poke Kaji in the chest. "What's with hiring guys like that for delivery?"

"How else was I going to get a good deal at short notice?" he countered. "Don't worry, the gear's all perfectly legitimate. Their boss knows what's good for him."

"Those were the same men as last time," observed Shinji. "I recognized the short one."

Misato turned to face Shinji. "Wait, you mean he had those guys haul my junk away?!"

"I told you, their boss knows what's good for him. And besides, they're not the shadiest people in town." Kaji bowed apologetically and tossed the house keys towards Misato. "Let me buy you yakiniku next Saturday to make amends?"

Suddenly blushing, Misato snagged the keys out of the air and glared at him. "Fine. Now scram."

Asuka watched Kaji departing, facts clicking into place. This was the man she'd been fascinated with? A man who apologized for hiring the Mob to deliver whatever-it-was by asking Misato on a date? "Ugh, that man!"

Shinji shrugged. "He's better than my father."

To be continued shortly in "Bifurcation III", expected date 02 August 2021.

Chapter Text

Shinji stared at the living room. The furniture had all been pushed against the walls, and pride of place was now given to a pair of thick white floor mats with red circles on them. Cables ran this way and that, connecting the mats to various bits and pieces of electronics, including a pair of black boxes mounted on the wall. "What's all this for?" he asked.

"It's a rhythm action system," said Asuka. "You know, a dance game! Haven't you seen one before? They were invented here!"

Shinji shook his head. "Not one like this. I've only seen the one in the arcade Ken and Tōji go to, and the boards for that are square."

Misato grabbed them both round the shoulders. "This, kids, is your new training setup! You have to learn to match your movements with each other so you can hit both of those Angel clones at the same time."

Asuka squirmed out of Misato's grip. "And we're using this lot for training? Seriously?"

"Seriously. There's a few other things on the cards, but we can talk about that after a lovely dinner from Shin-chan." Misato ruffled Shinji's hair and let go of him. "I'm going to get changed. Behave yourselves!"

The pilots watched their guardian vanish into her bedroom. After a few moments, Asuka shook her head. "That woman is impossible. So, 'Shin-chan', what are you making for dinner?"

Shinji looked at the kitchen and sighed. "I have no idea. I was going to go for groceries after school."

"Hmph. Well, I'm not waiting for you to do a grocery run! Why didn't you get some in yesterday?"

"Because I had enough ingredients yesterday, and I wanted fresh ingredients today." Shinji's fingers curled, and he took a deep breath. "Look, there's a delivery place sent out menus a few days ago, we can order out and then I can get groceries tomorrow."

Asuka glowered at him for a moment, then sighed and nodded. "Fine. But you'd better do something special tomorrow to make up for it."

"No promises," said Shinji, fishing the menu out from behind the rice cooker. "We don't know how tired we're going to be or what else Misato has up her sleeve."

The delivery Chinese wasn't as good as Shinji's cooking, Misato mused as she cracked open her third beer of the evening, but there was plenty of it. Finish this beer, and then she'd be able to weather any shrieking from Asuka over the crazy, crazy plan Ritz insisted was toned down from the MAGI's proposal. She raised the can and poured its contents down her gullet, wishing it was one of those fancy beers from the yakiniku place.

"Right, kids! It's time to talk about the training plan!"

"There's more than just those dance mats?" asked Shinji.

"Uh-huh." This was it. Three beers and a deep breath. That should be enough. "So the MAGI analysis is, and Ritz swears blind that she actually had to reject the first version, that you two need to do as much as possible together. Even sleep in the same room and keep the exact same hours."

"What?!" asked Shinji and Asuka, almost in unison, as they glared at her.

Misato looked longingly at the beer fridge. Maybe three wasn't enough after all. "Hey, you don't have to get changed in front of each other. We're not having you share a bed, just a room."

Asuka sprang to her feet and slammed her hands down on the table. "A boy and a girl our age shouldn't even be sharing a room!"

Misato pinched the bridge of her nose. "Asuka, I'm not negotiating with you about this. You're sharing a bedroom with Shinji until after this Angel is beaten. You're both going to bed at the same time, and you're getting up as early as he does."

"But he only gets up that early to make the food!"

"Well then, you can help him. You're supposed to do as much as possible together, after all."

Asuka looked at Shinji. "I don't know how to cook Japanese food."

Shinji looked at Asuka and held out a hand. "You can help chop the vegetables?"

Asuka looked down, glanced sideways at Misato, and shook Shinji's hand. Did they flinch a little just then? "Fine," said the redhead. "But don't get used to it. I'm not the housewife type."

Misato felt very proud of herself for not actually sighing with relief. "Fantastic! Great to see you working together." She waved a hand in the general direction of the lounge. "Now, Ritz says you two should start getting used to how that lot works ASAP."

Rei lay on her bed, looking up at the ceiling through half-closed eyes.

Her ears were ringing from the music Asuka had recommended, played as loud as her stereo could manage. It was fortunate the building, being near derelict, was otherwise vacant.

Her neck was stiff and her arms and legs ached, most especially where she'd driven the autoinjector home in her right thigh.

Her feet hurt from repeatedly landing hard on uncushioned flooring. She thought she might even have slightly twisted her right ankle.

She was curious, after hearing the lyrics, why Asuka liked the songs so much.

But none of that mattered.

What mattered was the feeling of the sheet against her skin where she'd flopped down onto the bed without showering off her sweat first.

It was bearable. She could lie still. She could imagine succumbing to her fatigue and sleeping until her morning alarm went off.

None of this was something she could share with the Commander. None of this was something she could share with Dr Akagi. Her curiosity about the lyrics, in particular, would not be acceptable.

Reluctantly, she stood up and started stripping the bed. Bearable or not, sleeping in sweat-stained bedding would make her poor company in the morning. Sleep would have to wait until she finished changing the sheets and took a shower.

Chapter Text

Despite the weariness in her muscles from a dismal trial round on the dance mats, Asuka found herself lying awake in the darkness.

With Shinji lying there on his futon, less than a metre away, that sense of missingness gnawed away at her. It was exactly as bad as she'd feared. The rest of her soul was so close by. She could practically reach out and touch it. She'd feel complete like that.

She'd also be touching a boy. A boy who shouldn't be in her room at all. A boy who should be safely hidden in his own room, far enough away that the feeling plaguing her could sink below the ache in her muscles. A boy who piloted an Eva. A boy she couldn't slap because it would be like slapping herself. A boy who was easy on her eyes.

"Shinji?" she asked, quietly so he wouldn't wake up if he'd managed to get to sleep like a lucky bastard.

"Asuka?"

She rolled over, not trying to move slowly, letting the mattress springs make whatever noise they made as she hung her hand off the side of the bed. She'd have deniability like that. Just tossing and turning, not deliberately putting her hand where he could reach it. She wasn't trying to touch him. She was just—

His hand brushed against hers. She snatched at it before he could pull away. However weird it felt, feeling his clothes and his bedding and the ghost of her own hand around her fingers, it made that feeling go away, the one she couldn't bear for long at this distance.

To his credit, to her simultaneous satisfaction and disorientation, he let her keep hold of his hand. "Asuka, I..."

She was holding a boy's hand.

She was holding onto a boy's hand with an iron grip because it made her feel complete.

And he... he was holding onto hers in return.

She hated that it worked. She told herself it wasn't like some gooey romantic nonsense from a love song. It really did make her feel like she was all there.

But they couldn't get to sleep like this. She couldn't lie like this all night with her arm hanging off the bed to hold Shinji's hand.

"Shinji. Get up here. Don't get any pervy ideas."

"Asuka?"

"Gott im Himmel. A pretty girl asks you to get in bed with her and you just lie there like a lump. Look. You can think whatever you want. I just..."

She couldn't say it.

She needed to say it.

"You said a boy and a girl shouldn't share a bed," he pointed out.

Bastard, using her own words like that.

"We need to sleep. I can't sleep like this. Get up here. I'll be big spoon. I promise I won't hit you just for thinking boy thoughts as long as you don't try anything funny."

He moved. She let go for a moment and shuffled back from the edge of the bed. He climbed in and did exactly what she'd told him. Legs touched legs and she felt the completeness come back.

She could sleep like this. She wrapped an arm around him like...

Like some kind of teddy bear.

Yes. Definitely a teddy bear. Definitely not a do— one of those.

Her eyelids sagged shut.

Shinji awoke to the blaring of the alarm clock. Groping blearily for where it should have been, slow realizations crept into his brain.

He wasn't in his futon.

The alarm clock wasn't where it should be.

The alarm clock didn't sound like his.

Asuka was spooned up behind him with her arm wrapped around him. He remembered now, falling asleep like this.

Asuka was between him and the alarm clock. If he let it keep blaring away much longer, Misato would probably come and check on them.

Misato would tease Asuka until the end of time if she saw them like this. He... didn't want Misato to do that. He didn't want to explain to Misato why he didn't want her to do that, because she'd either make salacious comments about it or tell Dr Akagi.

"Mrfl," Asuka mumbled into his hair.

"Asuka!" he hissed, trying to gently nudge her with his elbow. "Asuka, wake up!"

"Mrrf? Gah!"

Asuka pulled away from him, taking the sheet with her.

The missingness returned. It was cold and hollow.

There was a thud and a yelp behind him.

He rolled over, reaching out to slap the alarm clock's snooze button, and watched Asuka get to her feet, rubbing her elbow. "Ouch. Stupid dual sync bullshit," she grumbled. "Give me your hand."

Shinji sat up in bed and held his hand out. Asuka grabbed it, gripping a little too hard for a moment then slackening off as the connection returned. "You know we can't make breakfast like this, right?" he pointed out.

She glared at him, then sighed. "I know. Just let me have this moment, okay? It's... you know, right? The way it feels inside?"

"Yes." He glanced at the bedroom door. "When you're ready..."

She grimaced and reluctantly released her grip. "Yeah, yeah. Dibs on the bathroom."

Asuka dashed for the door, the hollowness inside Shinji fading with every step she took. It was still there, but when she was in another room he could ignore it.

Rei awoke, and felt a small but fierce joy despite the stiffness in her muscles. The feeling of the bedding against skin was still not entirely pleasant, but it was bearable. It held the prospect that she could spend the day fully clothed without wanting to tear her garments to shreds. As she went about her morning routine, she wondered how Shinji and Asuka would fare with their training.

Standing in front of the bathroom mirror, her hairbrush lying abandoned on the side, Asuka cursed a blue streak in German as she frantically flipped sections of her hair this way and that, trying to find a way to hide the patches where her roots had turned a very Japanese near-black instead of her proper red.

It was no good. There were just too many of those little patches, dotted about here and there.

"Asuka?" asked Shinji from the other side of the door. "Asuka, are you all right?"

She took a deep breath, gripping the edge of the washbasin as she tried to calm herself. It wouldn't show too much from a distance yet. She had time to do something about it.

Then she looked down at the backs of her hands. It was like vitiligo in reverse, patches just too big to be freckles where her skin tone had darkened a little to nearly match Shinji's.

She turned and flung the door open, even though getting closer to him would mean being able to feel her incompleteness. "You! This is your fault! If you hadn't been in my entry plug this wouldn't be happening!"

She wanted to punch him. If it wasn't like punching herself she would have. She wanted to grab him, but she couldn't allow herself to rely on him like that. He'd think she was weak. It wasn't like last night when neither of them could sleep if they weren't touching.

"What's my fault?" he asked. "I don't see what's happening!'

"Look at my hair, you... you. Look at it." Her eyes widened as he moved closer. Were those little pale patches on his neck like the dark ones on her hands? Were his roots growing in the colour hers should be, here and there?

"I don't... wait. I thought you were a natural redhead."

"I am! My roots weren't doing that before. And look at your neck in the mirror!"

It was Shinji's turn to stare wide-eyed at something impossible. "A-Asuka... what are we going to do about this?"

"How should I know? Ugh, Misato's going to tell Blondie about this when she notices, and then Blondie's going to call us in so she can poke and prod us and measure our brains again and God knows what else."

Chapter Text

Misato's gaze flicked from side to side as she ate her breakfast. For some reason, Shinji had taken his breakfast past the dance mats to the beanbag closest to the window, while Asuka was in the dining chair closest to the cooker and sink. "You're supposed to be doing everything together, you two." She paused, and noticed little dark patches growing in at the base of Asuka's hair. A tease sprang to her lips. "Asuka, your roots are show—"

No, wait. Asuka was genuinely a redhead. Misato knew that from her time in Germany.

Asuka looked... scared? "Don't tell Dr Akagi, all right? She'll just insist on poking and prodding at us both."

Misato pinched the bridge of her nose. She did not need this, not when the pilots had a training exercise to complete. "If you post good scores from your training today, I'll leave it be until after the Angel is dealt with."

Asuka frowned. "What if it's his fault?"

Misato began to doubt the wisdom of skipping her morning beer. "If there's any poking and prodding to be done she'll probably want both of you in the lab anyway."

Asuka's grip on her fork tightened, but she nodded. "Fine. Hear that, Shinji? If you mess up today the blonde is going to start poking us to find out what's up with my hair."

"Same if you mess up," he snapped back.

"Hmph."

Misato sighed and shook her head. She needed to get away before they drove her any crazier. She stood up, leaving her omelette half eaten, and grabbed the last piece of toast from the rack. "Work together, you two. We're counting on you."

Asuka watched Misato heading into the front hall, and waited for the sounds of the front door. "Get over here," she ordered, when she was sure Misato had gone.

"Why?" asked Shinji.

She glared at him. "You know why, ..." No. Calling him an idiot wouldn't actually help.

He smiled a little and got up from the beanbag. Asuka gritted her teeth as the emptiness became more intrusive with every step he took. She was not going to look weak in front of him.

He took the seat closest to her and laid his hand on the table. She looked down at it, weighing up her options, and laid her hand down on top of his. Nobody was watching to misinterpret it, after all. Finishing her breakfast one-handed was annoying, but it was worth it to not feel that emptiness nagging and gnawing away inside.

Shinji smiled at her. Why did he have to do that? It was like he wanted to make things complicated. She wasn't going to smile back at him, that was for sure. Even if touching his hand made life easier to handle.

Even if her stupid muscles twitched the corners of her mouth up. That was just because it felt odd to feel his smile clashing with her straight face.

"Those mats are too close together," she declared, when she'd finished her breakfast.

He looked over at them, then nodded. "We can't rearrange them, though. It's the only way they'll fit."

She took a deep breath. She had an idea. She didn't want to say it. Even if they both knew the reason for it, and it didn't mean anything, it would sound like something some sappy girl would be asking her boyfriend.

"We'll just have to put up with it," he said. "I guess we can make contact between stints."

Bastard. Who gave him permission to phrase it better than she was trying to?! "Yes. No funny business."

"No funny business."

Rei found her feelings about the day mixed.

In its favour, her clothes were tolerable against her skin. She would not be in danger of damaging them in her haste when she got home and undressed.

On the other hand, she was still more alert than she needed to be in Nebukawa-sensei's class, and she did not have the fascinating phenomenon of Asuka and Shinji's souls to hold her interest.

An idea occurred to her. It would mean spending more of the day clothed, but it might give her an opportunity to observe Shinji and Asuka some more. She typed a message. "Horaki-san, do you need someone to deliver Shinji and Asuka's work to them?"

"I was going to send Suzuhara-kun but if you want to, you can."

Rei couldn't help smiling.

Chapter Text

Hi, grommile here.

Thank you for coming with me on this journey. Your comments have encouraged me, but sadly, I remain profoundly dissatisfied with how I have written this story. It will be left to stand as it is, flawed and unfinished, because I am too conscious of its foundations of sand to keep building on it in its current form.

The first chapter of a new attempt at the core narrative, provisionally titled Defensive Design, will be posted in the next few days.

Thank you again for your support, and I hope to see you there!